#like literally i had spoken to dan ages ago about my concerns and pondering what i ought to do
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anyways its extremely telling that i did not listen to my misgivings and have wound up like this
in active withdrawal AND losing to thoughts of wanting to kill myself. cool
#like literally i had spoken to dan ages ago about my concerns and pondering what i ought to do#but told myself NO haha its fine whatever its meaningful change and i like making things and the people mostly#but its like oh hi. :-) hello old friend. of having a mental health crisis and resigning yourself once more#to the fact that youll be fine [if damaged] but in the meantime its just [excruciating horrors]#i dont know why i second guess myself haha considering ive basically always been right on a read of temperature#doesn't matter. poasting your way through the tears and blood and snot on your own blog is less damaging than like#going on a total impulsive destructive streak and indulging a little (1) little bit in asking for a data backup is fine#harm reduction looks like not downing your entire pharmacy of drugs and instead bleeding through tshirts
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