#like its so stressfull trying to lessen this catastrophy were creating and making worse while already living it | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

confessiononadancefloor · 2 months ago

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so i took this practical course from my university at my actual job campus this week and it left me in such deep despair. i just feel like i wasted so much time for a job in stem when i dont even like it and now its the only thing i know but im not even good at it because i hate it and cant bring myself to do anything properly! i am changing up and doing my patissery training i know that.. but im so scared of ending up hating that as well.. and i know im not to old to start something new but like i havent even started anything at all yet

#i need to get out of this country #also i dont know if ill be able to shed the responsibility i feel to do work in agrar #like i do like the job and i think its so important and id like to make a change but i can feel it draining my soul already #and i havent even started working fr yet #like its so stressfull trying to lessen this catastrophy were creating and making worse while already living it #and all the egos of randoms just make it so difficult for everyone like i just want to cry all day #i dont know if i can just forget abt all that and all the people that are suffering that i could help maybe even just a tiny bit #and just be a random pastry chef #like i think i already have all that knowledge like why would i waste it now kind of feels selfish #idk #having a crisis rn hihi #also i just dont fuck with academics.. and i dont want to be around them my whole life #or like at least until my masters or smth #I DONT WANT TO DO A MASTERS

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