#like it’s not the name i’m gonna publish it as but i always title my fics like this in my notes app lmao

[autistic-katara]

alright fuck you too then Siri

[luffyvace]

Helloooo! I saw ur request open and writing for saiki k! I see so little context of him 😭

May I request where saiki is dating his favorite author(she is an anonymous writer) and he didn't know (like she Naver though to tell him about it and she Naver really think of her work when w him or when in school) and maybe finding out through his dad that she is ? And how would he react and think after he found out ?

(sorry if my request was long 😭)

Yeah me too !! 😭

ohhh wow! What an interesting and fun request! Thank you :}

(you used ‘she’ so reader implied is fem but I won’t mention you being a girl just in case <3)

Don’t worry it’s not too long at all~

☕️🌷

Everyday you get home after school and write, as a comfort and to make some change to buy things you like :)

You do publish your work, but your an anonymous writer

your sales have been doing really good and everything! Your forever grateful!

it makes you happy seeing as though writing makes you happy and is your comfort!

so the fact that you could be doing that for others makes you joyous 💓

there’s also your boyfriend Kusuo!

he’s a reserved and genuine guy who treats you very well :)

you’ve been an item for a while now and your really happy in your relationship!

man you’ve really got it going for yourself!! 😋💪

this company has been loyally publishing your work for quite some time which makes you satisfied to see they like your writing!

school’s good too! You and Kusuo have a friend group who you go out with pretty often

(alright that was a little bit of some reader POV now here’s the fun part! 😆)

Kusuo finished his coffee jelly and was going down stairs to put the dishes in the sink

until he spotted his dad reading his favorite book/manga!!

”hey dad what book is that?”

his dad’s inner dialogue: “holy crap my son is talking to me!”

“oh uh nothing son just uh (book/manga title name)—I uhh, brought a copy from work home”

”they have that series there?”

”yeah! We do! We have every chapter! Actually, we’re the ones publishing them! Do want me to get you the set?…..if I lick my bosses shoes a couple extra times I’m sure I could pull a few strings..”

”thanks.”

his dad’s inner dialogue: “holy crap I just had a conversation with my son! He was wanted to talk to…me! I can’t believe it..!”

saiki’s inner dialogue: “goodness..😒🤦”

”n-no problem son! Heheh..”

He was gonna go back to his room but stopped at the stairs

“hey dad..the author uses a pen name..do you know who they are?”

“Huh-! Oh!- yeah I do! I’ve met them in person actually- do you wanna meet them?”

Kusuo nods and walks off

his dad then proceeds to dance in his living room, as he’s had a successful conversation with his son that Kusuo started 🕺🕺

Later that week, saiki and his dad wait for you to show up at his job with the latest chapter

he was indeed able to pull a few strings…by licking some shoes..

when you walk in Kusuo’s dad came up to you and (re)introduced you to his son

”Kusuo this is (Name), the author you asked me to introduce you to. (Name), meet my son Kusuo”

you looked surprised to see Kusuo and that he wanted to meet you?? I mean you know your anonymous but he likes your work?! You had no idea he was buying!

Kusuo has a slightly amused expression on his face

“Kusuo? You…”

..were at a loss of words at such a funny situation! (LOL)

you two ended up explaining both sides of the situation

you said you love to write, but anonymously and you never got around to telling him

he said this is his favorite series from you and your his favorite author, he’s been buying for a while to be frank!

ohhh!

this may be the way his parents found out you were a couple and let me tell you he was less than pleased..(not that he wanted to hide it but his parents…..:^ yeah 😃)

Saiki got the privilege of getting the first copy of the latest chapter before it was even published! :)

and now he always does <3

he also has the perk of getting it for free!

horray! Now he can save his money for coffee jelly- 😚

LOL not that he doesn’t wanna support you

you simply give it to him and he accepts ♥︎

he also gets the honors of helping you decide things for the story!

He gleefully reads the parts in which his opinion was inserted

however he doesn’t want to influence any major plot points- he doesn’t like spoilers :P

(It is possible he persuades people at school to buy your books so you can have the funding to keep going and make you happy simultaneously—but we’ll never really know 🤷‍♀️ )

your actually my first saiki k request! Thank you! I appreciate it love!

hopefully you had a good meal out of these headcanons cherished anonymous~ ☺️

[bueckers-sturniolo]

i have literally been begging for someone to write a paige fic based on “Slut!” by TS like the parts that’s like “if i’m all dressed up, they might as well be looking at us” where reader is famous and gets like hated on for being a “slut” 💁‍♀️💁‍♀️

“slut!”

paige bueckers x female!reader

a/n: hi guys!!! sorry it took me so long to edit this and actually post it. i don’t have much to say but THANK YOU FOR THE LOVE ON THE ALCHEMY!!! i promise part 2 is coming soon!!! ps: this may suck a little but i wrote it in an hour and a half so im sorry!!! also, this hasnt been proofread bc its 6 am and i havent slept! hope u somewhat enjoy!!! love uuuu!

warnings: naur, just swearing :)

word count: somewhere around 1k-ish

-

got love-struck, went straight to my head. got lovesick all over my bed. love to think you’ll never forget. we’ll pray the price, i guess.

you had been dating paige for 5 months, now. she was the best person you had ever met, and an even better lover than you could have ever imagined. but, being in the public eye isn’t necessarily ideal, especially when you’re queer. paige was a basketball player at uconn, and you had been famous for a few years. you had been famous before you knew paige, and even before paige was famous. it’s awesome, and you love it. the lifestyle can be very rewarding and enjoyable.

but, being ‘famous’ comes with its faults. as most things do. over the years, you had developed this sort of…. title. this title being that you are some kind of insane serial-dater. it was pretty ridiculous. of course, paige loved you for you, and didn’t really give a fuck as to what people had to say about you. but, it’s still obviously hurtful, and paige gets that.

present day, the epsy’s were coming up. this is something that meant a lot to your girlfriend. and, quite frankly, you’d do anything to make her happy.

until that thing was going as her date (or +1) to the epsy’s. not that you didn’t want to, not that it was because you were gay. but, because you knew how much this could mess with both of your careers. you didn’t really care about your own, cause people are gonna talk about you regardless, but paige’s social presence made it hard to just come out and do whatever you guys want.

“i mean, i’d just really want you there. we can like…. coincide outfits ‘n shit.” paige says, looking over at you, eating a bite of her cereal.

“yeah, p. i understand.” you say, sighing. you look down at your hands, acting like you were paying attention to anything to distract her (and yourself) from the fact that you really just do not know how it would go, and that fact is stressful in itself.

“baby, if you don’t want to go, it’s fine. im just saying it would be cool.” she says, and you meet her eyes again.

you know she’s right. it would be really fuckin’ cool. but like, at the same time, you really didn’t want to have to receive all of the texts from your publisher of news articles with pictures of you and paige where they essentially just put your name in bold letters then talk about how much of a slut you are for dating 4 people in your approximate 5 years of being famous.

yes, it may seem like a lot. but, also, most of these relationships only lasted a few months. you never necessarily wanted them to go public, but, they almost always did. that’s why you and paige took extra precautions.

obviously, one day, you wanted to tell people about you and paige. but, you wanted it to be when you guys had atleast made it past the new relationship stage.

but, if im all dressed up, they might as well be lookin’ at us. and if they call me a ‘slut,’ you know, it might be worth it for once. and if im gonna be drunk, i might as well be drunk in love.

you couldn’t help but give in. there was exactly a week before the epsy’s, and even though you’d kept telling paige you really didn’t think going was a good idea, you felt so bad for saying it that you randomly changed your mind.

“p, come here.” you say, calling from the couch in your living room. she walked in the room, hands on her hips, sleeves rolled up. she was loading the dishwasher for you, as the ‘gentleman’ she was (in a world of boys, (s)he’s a gentleman.)

“yes, baby? what’s wrong?” she says, walking toward you and sitting down, resting an arm on the back of the couch behind your head. “i wanna go with you, p. ill go with you to the awards.” as you say this, you fiddle with the hem of her basketball shorts.

“you wanna go with me? seriously?” she perks up. her whole face immediately lights up. this was the reason you were doing it. that reaction right there.“yes, love. i want to go with you.” she grabs your chin, pulling your face closer to her and gently pressing a kiss to your temple.

“you know, you don’t have to go if you don’t want to. i know you don’t want to read about all of the stupid shit men online say about you. they don’t even know you and it’s so infuriating that they think they can talk about my baby like that. my sweet, sweet girl...” she rubs your side, kissing your temple gently a few more times while babbling a few more sweet names in your ear.

“i know, p. but, i also know i don’t owe anyone shit, and if i want to go out in public with you, i shouldnt be scared. i mean- it’s just…. like, i don’t want to keep hiding us because of the fact that people always have some stupid shit to say. you know, if they call me a whore or if they call me a slut, it might be worth it. it may just be worth it this once.” she smiles ear to ear as you say this. seconds after this, she tackles you onto the couch, pecking all over your face as she tickles your sides.

half asleep, takin’ your time in the tangerine neon lights. this is luxury. you’re not saying you’re in love with me, but, you’re goin’ to. half awake, takin’ your chance, it’s a big mistake. i said, ‘it might blow up in your pretty face.’ im not sayin’ do it anyway, but you’re going to.

the night finally arrives. you guys are both getting your hair done. paige is wearing a lilac suit, and she looks ridiculously attractive. you were wearing a white dress with lilac heels, to coincide with her.

you guys get to the carpet, and it feels so surreal. you guys are finally out together and it’s just fucking insane. she does a few interviews, and they even ask you for your own pictures (even though you’re not an athlete)

the awards themselves are good, paige presents and even changes suits. she looks fuckin’ phenomenal.

but, then the after-party comes. the lights are tangerine and kinda dim, everyone’s drunk, and some people are even outside in a swimming pool. (???)

you had been to award shows yourself, but this was so cool. paige grabs you guys drinks throughout the night, careful not to get too wasted, but enough to get a little tipsy. by the end of the afterparty, so many pictures of you guys had been taken you felt like it was kinda too hard to hide your relationship from the world anymore.

while this wasn’t the main goal of tonight whatsoever, paige decided it was time to make your relationship social media official. she thought you deserved to be loved out loud, and honestly she couldn’t give any less of a fuck who said what. you loved her. she loved you. that’s all that mattered.

@paigebueckers

liked by kamoreaarnold and others

paigebueckers: Cats out of the bag I guess 🐈👜

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kamoreaarnold: Photo creds on slide 3

> paigebueckers: @kamoraarnold Best photographer 🙌

yourusername: wow she’s cute who is that

> paigebueckers: @/yourusername Idiot

>> yourusername: @/paigebueckers 😁

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[mayasaurusss]

Chapter one: Old tales.

Warnings: midly detailed description of wounds, not totally proof-read, gramamtical errors.

A/n: I'm really really scared to publish this (I'm shttng myself). The title is not really for my liking, maybe I will change it. English is not my native language so there may be some errors. Words: 4k and 500

"...will replace number eleven, Allie, after her accidental injury due to breaking her leg during practice" you heard coach Ben's words, but didn't fully register them yet.

Mere days have passed since Allie broke her leg, or to be exact, her leg was broken by Taissa.

When Allie broke her leg, you were on the bench, having had to swap with her during practice. You were relaxing, enjoying the sun when Misty walked over to you and started rambling about the most random things she could say, something about a philosopher, Misty was Misty after all. You weren’t really sure on how to even talk to her, so you just stayed silent, nodding sometimes while she talked, but your mind didn’t register anything of what she said. Misty-trance was so strong that, at first, you didn’t hear Allie screaming in agony. Your mind went into panic mode only when Misty bolted from her seat next to you to the green field: from your position on the bench you couldn’t see it but as you got closer to the scene, you saw Allie clenching her leg, her bone sticking out, pure white contrasting with the deep red of her flesh.

"... did you hear me?" you hear your name begin called, you peered at coach Ben.

"...What?"

"I asked if you'd like to replace Allie as the winger for the Nationals," coach repeated himself.

"Sure..." your voice was small, truth to be told, you weren't sure of this decision.

You weren't that brilliant as a player, certainly not that better than Allie, but at least you could fulfill your duty pretty well, you just weren't that certain you could perform well in such a big game. And, you weren’t exactly the most loved player of the team.

When you looked up, you could see all your teammates look at you weirdly, judging you and your absent demeanor.

"Despite what happened to Allie, we're gonna go to the Nationals, we're going to go and we're going to win, all right?" Ben said to the team, not receiving a response.

"All right?"

"Yes coach" the team responded in unison.

You gathered your things, heading out of the changing room when Shauna approached.

"Hey, are you all right? You seemed a bit shaken up before" Shuna Shipman was one of the few people in the team that talked to you, you used to be more of a loner but she and Jackie too, sometimes involved you in their conversation, you didn’t know if they did it out of pity or real interest.

"I am ok, I think. I'm just scared that I'm not gonna live up to the team's expectations, that's all".

Shauna smiled at you, "You're going to be great, don't worry, you'll just have to think you're playing during one of our practices".

"Thanks Shauna" she could always be kind, though her eyes were so deep and dark you felt lost looking at them, making you feel little and scared.

"The team will go to a party today to celebrate our success, are you going to come?" she asked.

"I don't know, I think I'm going to go back home tonight so I can spend the last night with my parents" you answered Shauna, you knew from deep down that as soon as you said that, you doomed yourself to 'unsocial girl' of the group.

“I see…” Shauna’s gaze felt heavy on you.

“Well, I’m gonna go” you slumped your bag over your shoulder and bid goodbye to Shauna, getting out of the changing room.

Rain pours heavily, pooling at your feet and wetting every inch of you, your shoes sink in cold puddles and your skin feels uncomfortably damp. 

You had been walking for half an hour, being that your home was in the outskirts of Wiskayok and the bus hadn’t yet come, your best chance was walking to another bus stop and waiting there; walking under the rain had proved to be more challenging than you thought, especially when the wet asphalt made you slip. 

At last you arrived at the bus stop and shielded yourself from the heavy rain. You sat on the bench, waiting for the bus which  had to come in a few minutes now, so preoccupied with trying not to slip and break a bone you had almost lost track of time and missed the bus.

You hold your face in yout hands, retaking in the events of the day and wishing Allie wouldn’t have broken her leg: you couldn’t perform well under pressure at all, you remeber once when you had to perform a penalty shoot during pratice and failed miserably, while all of the team watched you. The thought of people watching, watching you inevitably fail made you recoil in fear. 

A sudden noise interrupted your thoughts, something moved just inches away from you, hiding in the corner of the bus stop. You couldn’t make it out in the darkness, but your ears picked up on the fact that whatever it was small or certainly small enough for you to defend yourself. You jolted up, arms at your side tightening and muscles moving under the skin, ready to flight at any second. 

A ruff of red puffed out from the shadows, followed by a movement, whatever it was was now turning on you, having heard your noises. Two pairs of golden eyes peered at you from under the dark, studying your form and stance; maybe it was scared of you too. Slowly, ever so slowly, from the dark corner a fox appeared: it was bigger than you imagined, it was as tall as half of your leg, red and orange and white shades coloured its fur. It looked soft, the kind of fur that shielded from the cold winds of winter, a thin layer of what seemed to look like snow heaved on the tip of its coat and nose, tinting it white. Golden eyes reflected the dim street lights, giving it an eerie human look. It didn’t seem malicious, but there certainly was something unnerving in its presence.

“There shouldn't be any snow on you, it’s raining…” your voice was small, almost muffled, like sound and time stopped right here, under the roof of the bus stop. 

It continued to watch you, you, you, you in the eyes, your face, how you were. For a small second, you felt tightly connected with it.

Something talked, you didn’t know if it was your brain, your subconscious or the fox magically knew how to telepathically communicate with you but you heard thousand of tree whispers and thousand of voices reunited and combined to talk to you, to say “Come”.

Your skin freezed, blood running cold in your veins and feeling like it dripped from your fingers onto the floor. Goosebumps fell down your spine and in your mouth flooded the taste of blood, you had bit your tongue in fear.  

The fox watched you, puffing its chest and with hurry, ran behind the bus stop into the dark woods. You didn't know what compelled you to do it, but you followed it, cornering around the stop expecting to see it waiting for you at the line of the trees, but you found nothing staring at you beside the darkness. 

Lights shined through the rain, finally the bus had come. With newfound energy, you sprinted in it and almost tumbled over, making the driver eye you in confusion. You searched for a seat, finding it in the middle of the bus. You were still shaken up, not by the fact that you encountered a possibly dangerous wild animal, but at the fact that something talked clearly at you. Arms wrapping themselves you didn't fail to notice a small pair of golden eyes watching you from the darkness and as the bus moved, you lost sight of them.

“Come”.

“Mhm…no”

Shauna moves back to the clothes, changing once again her dress.

"You know, there’s Randy tonight at the party”. 

Huh? Why did she brought up Randy? I don't care about him.

“...ok” Shauna once again changed, once again she received the same response from her best friend.

“He asked Jeff to ask me if you’re gonna be there”

“Randy? Really?”

“What? I just thought you wanted to know if someone asked about you”

Wow, ok.

“Shauna, just put on the red dress I gave you”

Am I your dress-up doll Jackie?

“Maybe I don’t want to wear the red dress, and I’m sure as hell I don’t want to hook up with Randy -fucking- Walsh!”

Why can’t you see me? I don’t want to be with Randy, I want…

Jackie was taken back from Shauna's sudden outburst “Jeez, what crawled up your ass? Just put on whatever you want…”

“Thanks, I will”

The room filled with uncomfortable silence. Jackie felt like she just managed to ruin the night for both her and Shauna.

“...You’re probably right about Randy, you know? I once saw him having trouble with an escalator” 

Shauna cracked a smile, even in the most dire situations Jackie never failed to make her laugh “I once heard him ask who invented the Pope”.

Around 9 a.m, most of the soccer team arrived. There was a faint smell of earth in the air, covered by the smell of booze and fire. 

Shauna had followed after Jackie, just like the shadow Jackie wanted her to be -or did she want to be Jackie’s shadow?- she stood out among the other girl friends, she knew she didn’t belong here. 

Shauna stopped Jackie from dancing with her, her stomach clenching “Wait, l need a second” without waiting for a response, she walked away and Jackie did not bother following her. 

Shauna leaned against a pickup, watching Jackie in the distance.

To her, in that instant, while she was enjoying her night with her friends she looked ethereal. Shauna could not understand if she wanted to be with Jackie, if she wanted to be Jackie or if she wanted to consume her. Shauna can’t understand if what she’s feeling is longing, loneliness or anger, anger towards Jackie, for not spending time with her, for not begin with her. Shauna chugged down the alcohol burning her throat. Her emotions were too much, she had to go away, to get away from Jackie,  it didn’t help that behind her Randy fucking Walsh was drunk off his ass and bothering her. 

She had to release her pent up energy, -she had to get Jackie’s attention- , so she walked to where Taissa was, willing to start a fight.

“I admire your resilience Tai” Shauna’s voice was bitter, deliberately trying to get Tai angry and argue with her.  “It can’t be easy, knowing you fucking crippled someone today”

“Cool, good talk”. A vein in Shauna’s head pulsed “Just admit you did it on purpose” she yelled, “Excuse me?”

Away from her, Laura Lee recognized her teammates voices, she saw Taissa and Shauna talk to each other.

“Woah, calm down”

“No, listen you guys, we don't have to worry about the ‘Allie problem’ anymore because Taissa fixed it for us!”

Laura Lee walked over to the scene, leaning near Natalie “What is she talking about?” she asked. 

“She’s talking about Taissa having a plan”

Taissa visibly rolled her eyes at their exchange “Oh please, since when do you give a shit anyway? Don’t you have a bong to hit or a dick to suck?”

“Don’t talk to her that way”

“Fuck off Shauna! I don’t need you to defend me! Last time I checked you were fine with ‘freezing her out’”

“Ok, seriously, what are you guys talking about?”

“Shut the fuck up, Laura Lee!”

The atmosphere got heated, both Taissa and Shuna were too stubborn to let the other one ‘win the fight’ .

“Somebody needs to take her wasted ass home”

“Say that again you bitch!”. A fight broke between the group, everyone screaming their asses off.

“Enough!” Jackie screamed, the others hushed.  Everyone was watching the group, all the eyes of the party on them.

“Yellowjackets, with me!” Jackie said, leading the group to a secluded space.

“I don’t know what the fuck that was, but I do know it’s over”  Shauna shifted uncomfortably under Jackie’s gaze.

“We are about to go to Nationals, and based on what I’m looking at right now, we might not even bother getting on that plane” the underlying message wasn’t missed by the team: they weren’t close enough, they weren’t ready enough.

“Alright, everybody line up. I’m fucking serious, line up, come on!” The girls lined up one near the other, waiting for Jackie’ orders “I wan’t each of you to go down this line and say one nice, true thing about every other girl on this team”

“What is this, fucking girl scout?” Taissa's annoyed voice whispered to Van. “Who wants to go first?” Jackie asked. Laura Lee smiled “I’ll go Jackie”

She walked over to Taissa, looked her in the eyes and took her hands in hers, “Taissa, you’re beautiful in the eyes of our Lord” making Taissa smile -maybe more like trying to hold her laugh-. Laura Lee moved to Van, repeating herself when she was interrupted, everyone laughing. Everyone in the group moved, going to ‘say something nice and true’ to their teammates.

“I’m sorry for what I said earlier” Shauna said to Tai, dark eyes burning a hole in Tai’s skin. Taissa looked at Shauna, voice unsure and laced with regret “I didn’t -you know- mean to…hurt her” 

“...ok” 

Laura Lee walked to Lottie, her hands rubbing nervously: sometimes Lottie made her tense. She didn’t know if it was out of fear or respect for the girl, or if it was some sort of other emotion plaguing her heart.  With a bit of uncertainty, Laura Lee looked up at her teammate, “Lottie, you’re really tall, you are one of the best players in the team, and I  admire your strength. And, you're beautiful in our Lord's eyes”. Lottie just smiled, that smile that reassured Laura Lee that everything would be fine “Laura Lee, you have a beautiful soul and you are a great friend. I admire your devotion” Lottie said.

“Thanks, really. Wouldn’t you want to spend some words for Y/n?��

Suddenly, Lottie’s voice got sour, her brown knitted together  “Why would I want that? It’s not like she’s here, no?”

Laura Lee knew that by how Lottie reacted, she had unknowingly pushed something inside her: Lottie had tried and failed to be friends with the other girl, but the -Operation: become friends- had failed on both ends because of Lottie stubbornness (and secret shyness) and the other girl not knowing how to relate herself with others.

“I know it’s just that she’s not really part of our group and I feel bad for her...”

“If she wanted to be part of our group, she would’ve come” Lottie wanted to go away, the air seemed thick now and a faint headache was starting to form. She started to walk away when Laura Lee stopped her, grabbing her arm.

“I understand why you would think so, but I think she's just shy or lonley. Maybe she requires a bit more of work to get her to open up her shell”.  She took Lottie’s hands in hers, rubbing at the skin to soothe the other girl's tension.

“You should aske her to sit next to you on the flight” .

“...alright”.

You stumbled into your home, leaving a wet trail behind you. The house was dark, dark and cold, shadows looming over the corners of the room.

I hope no foxes magically get out of them and make me shit myself, you thought with a bitter smile, still not feeling completly safe.

You called out for your parents but no one answered. Taking your phone out you saw a missed called and a message from your father

“Hey kid, just a heads up, me and your mother are going on a date, we will be home late tonight, in the fridge there’s a leftover pizza. Be safe”.

You sighed, you couldn’t blame this on them really, you knew they had a date and they still didn’t know that you’d be gone to the Nationals soon, besides you still had a few days to spend with them. 

After dinner, you went upstairs to your bedroom. It’s dimly lit, shadows creep in the high corners, making your skin crawl. On the nightstand, an old copy of ‘Grimm’s Tales’ sat, the one that your grandfather gave to you some weeks before passing, when you were just eight. It was meant for children apparently, but it was more like pages of pages of inducing nightmares stories: young women envied by queens, of children in woods being chased by wolves or finding an evil witch house. You were still reading when you fell asleep.

That night you dreamt. You dreamt of thousands of trees, branches tangling with each other so much that you couldn’t see the dark night sky. The woods were silent, fog embraced them and not giving you enough space to see. In the distance a howl echoed out, something that sounded angry, angry and hungry. Your skin crawled, cold shivers running down your spine and without thinking, you ran. 

You ran not knowing where to go, without guidance while the howl got closer and closer, branches scratching at your skin staining it of red. The howl multiplied, as if whatever was chasing you had called its companions. Skin bloodied, lungs burning in pain, eyes watering, sky crashing on you. 

Finally your energies gave out, mouth tasting the dirt beneath you. Something grasped at your body, hands prying you up, someone was holding you to their front, brushing your hair out of their way to your neck. You felt someone biting at your jugular, blood oozing from the open wound. Hands, so many hands touched your skin, clawed at it, brushed your blood away from bruises into the dark surrounding you. Teeth, thousands of teeth clenching your skin, grounding on it, ripping it open, eating like the prey you were, like a fox caught between the jaws of a bear.

You woke up from your nightmare, sweaty and with a heart beating irregularly. 2:02 am. You looked at your book still open in your hands, fingers keeping it open on the middle of 'Red Riding Hood'. Your body fell back on the bed, sleep overcoming once again.  “I really shouldn’t keep on reading these books…” 

On the other side of town, Lottie dreamt too. But hers was a good dream unlike the ones she had the previous weeks. Lottie wouldn't wish anyone to know but she too was scared of playing in the Nationals; the tension is what to her the the woods looked more alive than ever now, she did so much to keep them alive, offered so much of herself to the woods that now they thanked her in return. The voice spoke to her, whispering through the trees, animals and wind and leaves all swirled togheter to create It. 

She wouldn’t give this gift to any one, the times she tried talking about it, talking with her parents, her father got mad and screamed at her mother - “Lottie doesn’t see the future, she’s not normal. We’re taking her to a child psychiatrist”-.

She never understood if he did it out of love or disinterest to have her around. It favored her, this secret is just for her. Before coming to have an audience with it, she had positioned small wooden dolls in a circle, one for each of them.  But they were sad. She couldn’t understand why,

Why are you crying? Yes, it began snowing and it's cold but can’t you hear It? 

Why? Can’t you hear Its voice? 

Can’t you hear the woods?

Finally it was the morning of your flight. You got up at five am, too nervous to go back to sleep and started to recap if you got everything for the trip. At seven am you had eaten breakfast with your parents and bid goodbye to your mom, kissing her on the cheek “Be safe”. 

Your father drew you to the airport, “Are you sure you don’t want me to drop you near the plane? Your bags are heavy”; bless your mother, even if you did pack enough, she just had to help you pack, inevitably heaving you down “Take this sweater if it’s cold, you never know, and these pants, and this shirt, and these…” you had to physically stop her to pack more.

“I think I’m capable of carrying them on my own, I don’t want the other girls to see me as a ‘daddy’s-girl’”.

You got out of the car, grabbed all your bags and walked to the driver seat “Alright then, have you packed enough?” you looked at your father with a look that said ‘seriously?’.

“Fair enough…”

Your dad ruffled your hair, “Call when you get there, ok? Become a champion”. You gave him a corny smile, “Sure dad”.

“Have a safe flight!”, he drove away, you watched as the small car disappeared from your sight then walked to where your teammates were.  When you got there, all the team saw was a make-shift Santa Claus coming to them.

“Heyyy, forgot to pack something? Mommy helped you?” Tai said to you sarcastically. 

“Tai, enough” Van answered, making her friend scoff. The bags hit the floor, you let out a heavy sigh at the action finally free from the weight. “Don't mind her, she's just a bitter asshole”, Taissa scoffed at her friend “Oh fuck off”.

Lottie and Laura Lee were close, watching the exchange between you and Van “Lottie! Come on, go!” she wisphered to her taller friend. Lottie shifted uncomfortably on her legs, hands rubbing together behind her back, she walked to where you were, followed by Laura Lee “Hey…” her called, small and unsure “Hi”.

Lottie wasn’t one to be awkward, most of the time, but confronting you one on one made her feel less confident in herself and

“So, uhm… how are you today?” she cringed at herself. 

"You should ask her to sit next to you on the trip" Laura Lee voice chimed in her head

“Huh…good, I think? How are you?”

“I see, uh, yeah yeah, I’m good too”

Silence fell over you, both not making an effort in trying to make small talk. 

The staff announced that they were ready to leave.

Van chimed near you, draggin you with her “Hey, you want to sit next to me? We should be friends” she playfully said to you.  Laura Lee sighed, “Oh... We'll get to know her once we land” she patted her teammate on the shoulder.

The inside of the plane was modern, everyone was mouth agape.

Van laughed “I’ can’t believe your dad paid for a private plane”

“It’s pretty much his only form of parenting. I guess I’ll take it”

“Well, thank you, Mr Matthews!”

Every girl in the team sat, Van tugged you with her near her seat, you fell between her and the window. 

“So, what do you like?” Van asked, a smile forming on her lips

“W-What?”

“What do you like? As in movies, games, magazines? Is there something you even like?” 

Oh, did she want to sit with me to make fun of me? 

“Uhm… The last movie I got to see in theaters was 'Intervew with the Vampire'...but that was sometime ago ”.

“No way! Really?! Did you go alone?”.

“Yes…”

Her mouth was agape with shock, “Wow, I wouldn’t have your courage, you know? I like those movies -well, I like slashers more- but if I’d see one alone, I have nightmares for weeks” . You smiled and laughed with her, she was trying to make you feel less lonley “The last movies I have seen were ‘Halloween' and ‘Braveheart’”.

“What’s that last one about?”

“A drag queen fights the English army”.

“What?!” you laughed wholeheartedly with Van, she was holding your arm in a subtle effort to include you more and more into this conversation.  “You know, there’s this movie that's supposed to come out in december, it’s called ‘Scream’ and it’s supposedly a slasher, I can’t wait to see it. I’m gonna need someone to keep me company though, I'm not really that brave”.

You looked at her “Whit who?” asked, “Maybe you, maybe Taissa”.

“Ohhhh, I see”

She playfully shoved you, “What do you ‘see’, moron?”.

After a while of talking, your eyelids started to get heavier, begging you to take just a tiny nap.  “I think I’m going to sleep for a bit, I’ve woken up so early today…”

“Sure, I’ll wake you up when we got there”. You closed your eyes, sleep overcame you faster than you expected.

You were hungry, you finally managed to catch dinner after a while of running and biting and howling in the woods, she fell so dumbly into the trap, you wouldn’t ever die like this if you were in her position.  Blood runs down to earth, tinting the snow red.  She was so stupid to get caught.  The queen had made you wait, telling you that a meal is far more filling when you are patient. But you had been patient for oh so long, always grumbling and biting at your own flesh to keep your hunger at bay. 

When the queen nodded, all moved to the dinner plate like hawks, bit and ripped and grounded the meat under their teeth, surrounded by the flickering lights of the torches. If one doesn't think too much of it, this was just like the holidays you used to have once, food and lights. After all, a family's most intimate moment is at the dinner table. None was left of her.  It was still watching you. 

Scream erupted from the deep woods, you looked at the trees, your hair disheveld, face dirty , a trail of blood running down on the right side and dripping from the chin. 

You woke up from your haze, screaming filled the plane. “Van?! Van, what’s happening?!” Van is desperately trying to get out something from the ceiling above you , punching and screaming while everyone around you was either hugging each other, passed out or panicking. You felt your fingers weakening, trying to help Van and failing to get out the oxygen masks, dizziness overcame your senses, breathing erratic, goosebumps on your skin, eyelids heavy.

Lottie took your hand, ushering you gently to follow her, “Come on”.

You felt something hot travel up on your arm.

“It’s time to go”.

What’s happening?

Green trees are getting closer, your eyes roll to the back of your head and you lose yourself.

“We have to hunt”.

Am I going to die?

“We have to eat”

I don’t want to die!

“Is the meat cooked well enough, dear?” 

Mom?

The plane is crashing.

“Did you liked dinner?”

L-Lottie?

You can't breathe.

Help me!

A voice called out to you in thousands of whispers. 

“Come”. 

[fiveredlights]

the oversharement of the author: a completely unnecessary post containing my multitude of thoughts on takes one to know one

everyone has been so kind and wonderful about TOTKO so here’s a very, very, very, long author’s note which is me just rambling about anything and everything as a thank you for all the love 🫶

background

for those aware of the fiveredlights lore you may remember in april i had to pause updates because of some weird arm/wrist pain... so that was carpal tunnel syndrome and idk what i did to invoke it this july/august but it came back with such a vengeance that i did not think i was physically gonna be able to write this. but maxiel would not shut up in my brain so i got my hot water bottles and got to work.

this whole idea began after i saw travis kelce go on stage on the eras tour and i went... max and daniel absolutely possess the right type of insane to do something like this.... you can see the original thought post here

the albums

i thought making the albums would take me like a day. literally right up until i hit publish i was still making changes to Sidelines, and i had convinced myself they were real tangible albums with the amount of times i hit albums instead of the playlist button on spotify.

Second Place

the easier album, finished this is a day. cut songs were killer by phoebe bridgers and loml by taylor swift. i was gonna do a whole thing where i was gonna be like “oh the relationship killed him so much he abandoned the guitar to sing a sad piano ballad” and then i realised moon song is rooted in piano. so uh that was cut.

there also was a whole thing where his ex was personified as fire — “can the killer in me tame the fire in you” (killer) with “our field of dreams engulfed in fire” (loml) parallel that i really enjoyed but unfortunately never made it in. also loml has a lyric “the coward claimed he was a lion” which is fun with max adopting the lion as his symbol….anyways

the titled second place comes from another SMAU i used to write for a different fandom (on twitter so it is long gone, rip), where ironically it was also a singer/famous au and i was clearing out my spotify playlists and found the fake album and was like huh. i like that name. luckily for me it worked for the album storyline as well so good times!

Sidelines

this album changed at least fifty times. for the first three weeks of me writing it was called 3 (THREE) because I’m annoying like that, but the more i looked at it i could not convince myself daniel would call it that. because yes, it is his max album but calling it thirty three is a tad too much (in my opinion anyway). sidelines was always on the album, but i was going through my tik tok maxiel folder and saw a daniel edit to sidelines and was like okay yeah that's a better name.

out of 11 songs, only 5 of the original tracklist made it in. cut songs included:

call your mom by noah kahan

apple pie by lizzy mcalpine

orange juice by alfie jukes & nell mescal

orange juice by noah kahan

ivy by taylor swift

science by niall horan

who we are by hozier

with ivy there’s a lyric “and i’ll drink my husband’s wine” which would’ve been the way max and daniel would’ve been like “we’re married lol” but it was cut because to ME ivy is about sapphics cheating on their husbands with each other and i just can’t rewrite ivy like that. here’s some deleted scenes on that:

jeanie 🤠 @/COTADANIEL · i’m sorry daniel WHO’S WINE ARE YOU DRINKING????? driccrodeos [Video: Daniel on stage singing the lyric, “And drink my husband’s wine,” looking offstage to Max, before turning back to the audience and smirking, continuing to sing.] category five event has hit the maxiel towers noah @/ricciardanielo · this album has actually killed me. like i’m not on this earth anymore. why? ivy: “And I’ll drink my husband’s wine.” peace: “Give you my wild, give you a child.” @ max and daniel do you have something you want to tell us or??? ric33stappen if you attend the next race with a ring on your finger and a baby in your arms i swear to god max and daniel i will fuck you up (politely) #like i respect their privacy or whatever but also what the fuck #you know what i mean like what the fuck

in sidelines almost every single song (except for you could start a cult) has a daniel3.jpg post pertaining to a lyric... i realise maybe i should've had someone in universe point it out because i now realise it's quite difficult to spot. whoops.

daniel’s sidelines: live from red rocks is inspired by phoebe bridgers punisher tour (she flicks through the pages of a storybook), taylor swift era’s tour (the lover house) and noah kahan (we’re all be here forever tour; watched live from fenway park specifically on how to write his concert). the whole concert idea was also written literally 5 hours before posting because i originally had a max and daniel article but i could not write it.

easter eggs

i feel incredibly pleased that so many of you picked up on the easter eggs like i get why taylor swift is so insane about hers because it's just so much fun! (spoilers for the rest of my fics...)

blue sweater (thank you to ataraxiaa on ao3 who commented because I didn't realise i had done it) -> glitter on the floor maxiel's communal blue sweater

matthew (rriicciiaarrddoo) & callan (callonmax33) daniel would make a great TP -> old habits die screaming

jake 3(3)81racers Can Max Verstappen fight? -> glitter the floor chapter 3 & 5 recurring plot line

daniel's july 2 2025 post (Photo 2: Max and Daniel sitting in front of a fireplace, the person taking the photo is behind them. Max has his arm around Daniel’s waist, whilst Daniel has his right arm giving the middle finger to the photographer and head turned to the left with an annoyed expression. Max has his head tucked into Daniel’s neck, laughing into his shoulder.) -> inspired by glitter on the floor's 2024/6/7 monaco dark laneway posts

rriicciiaarrddoo "are george and alex married" -> a future easter egg for the glitter on the floor galex sequel

daniel's august 10 2025 post:

 A vase filled with tulips on a table with a white table cloth. -> glitter on the floor, last daniel3.jpg on 2023 has a vase full of flowers, was meant to signify that they got married

Two kookaburra garden statues, next to a rocking chair on a balcony. -> gary and steve from glitter on the floor

daniel's caption: The rumours are true, I am now in possession of half of Max’s WDC and they will be going on auction next week. -> fool me once

things five forgot to include because i have horrible memory but they canonically happened (this will absolutely be updated when i remember new things)

daniel ricciardo broke his hand whilst karting when younger which is why he gave up racing-> lyric in forever "broke a bone that never healed in my hand"

he gets into singing because grace and joe ricciardo put him in choir as a way for him to get out all his yapping and talking at least once a week so they can get a little peace (but it doesn't work because now he sings around the house)

real life references

sometimes i like to use a little reality so that the universe doesn't feel too far away and here's all the real life things i pulled from:

hair tuck max in f1tv japan interview: 2023 honda thanks day

daniel looking like darth vader in austin rain: 2023 monaco boat race

daniel wearing max's hat: 2017 baku podium

checo fought his way to finish p9: probably any race from the latter first half of the 2024 season

daniel ricciardo international relations expert: 2024 post belgium gp

twitter realises daniel ricciardo is hot actually: 2022 abu dhabi gp (the outfit)

daniel playing max's GP in his concert -> i saw adele pause her concert for the olympics womens 100m final so that's how that got in (also i did so much time zone math in order to make sure it was actually the right timing)

max and daniel escaping in a helicopter -> post 2024 belgium gp

[iamdispleased]

Found Some More Hatchetfield Lore!

tldr; at bottom

I remembered that one of the Lang brothers said that Wiggly is based off of Cthulhu, so I decided to do something digging on a piece of shit author, H.P. Lovecraft and y’all… Okay, I don’t know if it counts as lore, but Hatchetfield is right under our noses.

CW: H.P. Lovecraft’s writing is full of bigotry, and if you plan on reading it, prepare yourself. For example, there is an evil entity named Shub-Niggurath. Yeah.

I don’t like H.P. Lovecraft, nor do I enjoy his writing in general, so here are some things that people should look up if you want to find out Hatchetfield’s inspiration. More thoughts on why I cannot write about him are at the bottom.

Also! I do not look down or dislike people who enjoy H.P. Lovecraft’s writing and his creations, and would really love for people to continue to look into things I cannot. I hope my little notes help!

(I’ve linked the stories in pink!)

SPOILERS: Hatchetfield? I guess? The Cthulhu Mythos & The Dream Cycle.

Cthulhu Mythos:

Just read ‘The Call of Cthulhu’. Everything makes sense.

Miss Holloway is based off of a character named Horvath Blayne from the anthology series The Trail to Cthulhu by August Derleth. Here’s one of them. ‘The Black Island, Being the Narrative of Horvath Blayne’.

Duke Keane is also taken from The Trail to Cthulhu.

The narrator of ‘The Call of Cthulhu’ is named Francis Wayland Thurston.

Professor Hidgens is based off of an art student named Henry who is known for being eccentric and living in solitude. (The Call of Cthulhu)

Emma Perkins is named after a ship called the Emma. The crew got into a battle with Cthulhu’s cult members, which resulted in the Emma having one survivor. (The Call of Cthulhu)

John MacNamara is based off of the police officer John Legrasse. (The Call of Cthulhu)

Willabella Muckwab resembles Lavinia Whateley, from ‘The Dunwich Horror’. She has a son, Wilbur Whateley (Wilbur Cross), whose father is the cosmic entity Yog-Sothoth (Wiggog Y’rath). Lavinia went missing on Halloween, and the assumption is that Wilbur killed her.

The Black Book is the Necremonium.

There’s always professors somewhere.

The Dream Cycle:

LOL. The Dream Cycle is a collection of short stories surrounding dream cities. I honestly haven’t read anything about this other than brief stuff from the Wiki, but the connections are painfully obvious.

The word ‘oblivion’ is written in the Black Book. H.P. Lovecraft has a poem titled Ex Oblivione. The narrator sees a gate in his dreams and wants to get past it, but he can’t access it. He eventually does, though. Yikes. Read this post, picture Willabella Muckwab as the narrator for Ex Oblivione, and enjoy.

Bonus: Some of the covers of the magazine that published H.P. Lovecraft’s work (Weird Tales) are sprinkled throughout Hatchetfield.

“Pete, get behind me! I’ve got a gun.”

“Steph… it’s a ghost. I don’t think that’s gonna do any good.”

Rosary? Killer Track, much? Also, the art style for the Black Book kind of resembles this… huh.

-

Note: I had planned to read all of H.P. Lovecraft and the associated work, but the racism is too much for me. I can’t “separate the art from the artists”, especially when everything evil is so obviously and horrendously based on Black people, as well as other races. Again— Shub-Niggurath. Like, seriously?

It’s a huge bummer, because I have so many thoughts— like the implications behind Willabella Muckwab associated with Lavinia Whateley, and Wilbur Cross also being associated with Wilbur Whateley. So much is at our finger tips.

I’m still going to be writing other things, though!

I have more of the Black Book deciphered, so that’s exciting, especially since I actually got some stuff right in my first post. (It was looked at through a more religious lenses rather than an H.P. Lovecraft lenses, though.) BUT STILL. MY EYES HURTING FROM INTENSE SQUINTING SESSIONS WAS NOT FOR NAUGHT! And I know I state some of these things as if they’re facts, but they’re ‘probably based on’ stuff.

Alright. I’m off to read about physics, the concept of nothingness, and the æther in the name of theatre kid.

tldr; the Lang bros made a the TTRPG Call of Cthulhu homebrew and turned it into musicals.

[beyondspaceandstars]

Ivy

Relationship: Steve Rogers x Reader Warnings: Cheating/implied cheating, slight angst Summary: Although you're already happily married, you and your apartment neighbor Steve have started a bit of an affair. And it's growing. Rapidly. (Inspired by: "Ivy" by Taylor Swift) A/N: oh hello everyone :) this is an older fic I wrote right after evermore dropped (hence the title and lyrics) but I'm going through and publishing some of my old writing I've been holding onto (I think I published this one under a different account but I spruced it up a bit). Hopefully newer stuff will come soon :)

Masterlist

"Oh, I can't Stop you putting roots in my dreamland My house of stone, your ivy grows And now I'm covered in you"

It happened fast. It happened so fast that you didn’t know where the breaks were until it was too late. He was just… there. Always there. Standing in the hallway, walking on the sidewalk, shopping at the freaking grocery store. It was a kaleidoscope of instances with him from the bumping into and the lingering gazes to the knowing smiles. It was fast and… spreading.

It was spreading, yes.

He was spreading, from your heart to your brain. Every second of every dream was filled with the what ifs. What if you held his hand when he asked to walk with you to the store? What if he happened to fall asleep in your bed after you asked him for his help with something? What if, in the end, your marital hand was his to take instead? The scenarios played out time and time through the night, forcing you to wake up with a fluttering heart and a guilty conscience.

Your husband—the man you were actually involved with and supposed to be dedicated to—kindly made you coffee every morning, having no idea about your infidelity-filled dreamland. He could barely even remember Steve’s name while his entire being lived in your soul, day in and day out. It felt like a cruel punishment.

"Good morning," your husband greeted you as you padded into the living room. As expected, two mugs in hand, one outstretched towards your sleepy form. You hugged the coffee carefully, giving a smile back in greeting, but the action twisted your stomach. You couldn’t recall last night’s dream yet the feeling of it all lingered.

"I know today was supposed to be my day off but I gotta run to the office real quick," your husband explained as he sipped his coffee and collected his files. "You’ll be okay here, right?"

Your heart skipped. Nodding, you said, "Yeah, I think I’ll go to the coffee shop and catch up on reports."

"You have coffee right there, silly," your husband chuckled, motioning his mug towards yours. You looked down at the steaming, dark beverage. You could just make yourself out in the reflection, coming face-to-face with your tired eyes and frowning lips.

"Yeah," you shrugged. "I want one of those fancy blended drinks. They’re practically milkshakes."

Steve liked those drinks, you subconsciously noted, even though he pretended he didn’t. He was carrying one when you bumped into him on the street a few weeks after moving into the apartment building. When you asked what it was, he acted like he had no clue and claimed he was just holding it for a friend. You remember giggling at his frantic explanation but eventually, he confessed his deep, dark coffee secret. You were sworn to secrecy on the manner.

Maybe Steve would like to tag along with you today. The idea hit you like a train. You didn’t know where it came from. Well, you did but… Oh.

"Honey?" Your husband’s voice shook you out of your thoughts. "Are you okay?"

You coughed, "Yeah, I’m alright. Just a little sleepy."

"Hmm, okay," he nodded, still eyeing you suspiciously. "I’m gonna get ready and head out."

You nodded in acknowledgment as he gave you a quick peck and departed for your bedroom. Suddenly feeling sick, you dumped the mug’s contents in the sink and slammed the cup on the counter.

Running your hands through your hair, you stood in the kitchen. Mind screaming, heart-burning.

****

Your head was fuzzy as you got dressed for the day. You waited until your husband had left for the office as you had plans with your appearance. It came easily, you found, to put in a little effort. After getting married, both you and your husband found comfort in the natural and casual but now there was something shiny and new. There was maybe someone who appreciated you trying and it filled you with that schoolgirl anxiousness. It was wrong, though, so wildly wrong.

You could suppress it all, though. So easy, you thought. Nothing wrong with a married woman getting herself together to feel good. It was about you, of course. At least that was what you managed to convince your head to recite as you applied the lipgloss and curled your hair. It was partially true—you did like how you looked—but that background voice, that voice you heard in your dreamlands, reminded you of where your heart was.

Sighing, you forced yourself to step away from the mirror and collect your work. You actually did have plans to work on reports for your job but you wouldn’t mind a certain next-door soldier keeping you company.

You hadn’t exactly done this before, you realized as you stood at Steve’s apartment door. Your time spent with one another was always just…coincidental. At least, that’s what you perceived it as. You two happened to go to the grocery at the same time or walked up the stairs after work at similar hours. Fate was laying it out and you were stupidly taking the dive.

Swallowing your doubts, you knocked on the door.

For a few seconds, you thought about turning away and running. Purse gripped tightly, that felt like the only move, and just when your feet started inching towards the stairs, the door swung open.

He appeared in the doorway like a golden dream come true. Eyes bright and smile as big as the sky, Steve looked pleased to see who was on the other side of his door. He was fully dressed for the day. Shoes on and everything as if he was almost on his way out. You felt even more stupid now realizing of course the most important man in the city had somewhere to be.

"Good morning," Steve greeted you. "What a surprise."

"H-Hello," You let out a humorless laugh with your stupid response and looked down at your nail polished nails, picking away at the nude paint. Anxiety was bubbling up, forcing your words out straight to the point. "I was just… I don’t know. This is probably so stupid or whatever but I was gonna go to the coffee shop down the street to do some work. Do you want…some coffee?"

Gosh, your face must have been beet red as you felt the temperature in the hallway rise drastically. Steve, however, didn’t even flinch at your suggestion. He folded his arms and leaned against the door frame, his smile turning into a hinting smirk. He eyed your nervous stance carefully and you could feel it. Your feet started itching to flee, again.

Steve shrugged, "Are you asking me to come with you to the coffee shop?"

"Well, I mean-,"

"A coffee date, perhaps?"

You gasped, your heart plummeted. This wasn’t— You couldn’t— He was getting in your brain, putting thoughts there now. Everything felt so suggestive suddenly. You were insane for this. Your husband and the rings you still adored… What was becoming of you? No, what was becoming of him? It was his work, wasn’t it? But you were here? Brain on fire, you wanted to scream.

"Steve—,"

He chuckled, nearly completely unaware of the races in your mind. "I’m just joking. I think I would enjoy some coffee right now."

You gulped and reeled yourself back in. "Wonderful."

Steve was right by your side the entire walk. Your elbows brushed so casually yet flamingly. Your skin ignited with every step and God forbid if someone was coming up the sidewalk from the opposite direction. The way Steve pushed into you to make room felt like at any second he was going to pin you against one of the brick buildings lining the sidewalk.

There was the issue with his hand, too. His pockets were free to use yet he let his hands stay at his sides, brushing over yours ever so gingerly. Every time it did, his fingers hit your wedding band, operating as your not-so-subtle reminder.

It felt like a bad game. A bad, teasing game. The tension was rising and what originally started as light banter or silly laughs here and threatened to turn into stiff beats around the elephant in the room. But gosh, he was so kind and funny and just glowed throughout, so you would deal with it and let today go where it goes.

When you arrived at the coffee shop, Steve held the door open for you, motioning for you to enter. He gave a cheesy bow as if you were some kind of royal. You gave a silly curtsy in response which he lit up at.

See, you told yourself, go with the flow. There was still banter and fun with him.

At the cashier, Steve ordered for both of you and allowed himself to pay as well. While you tried to object, he was already done with the transaction and pushing you into the nearest booth. You frowned at his generosity but he chose to ignore your antics.

He went to retrieve your drinks as you set up your laptop and papers. Steve returned now with a faux frown on his lips as he noted your collection of items.

"So," he said, clearing his throat and sitting across from you. "I get to sit here while you do work?"

You shrugged, "I only asked if you wanted coffee. You invited yourself along."

Chuckling, he responded, "As if I would miss a chance for a day out with you."

Your heart plummeted for what felt like the umpteenth time today. Placing your pen down, you looked up at the smirking Steve. His eyes were staring you down, shamelessly roaming all over you. You could and couldn’t believe his boldness.

"Steve—,"

"Don’t you have work to do?" He pointed his cup at the papers. You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion. God, it was all starting to get confusing again. He knew where the line was, right? Why was he pushing it? Why were you even allowing it? Because it fed some fantasies? Aided with some brief passings of loneliness? There was just always something in his words to you. A twinkle or so behind those looks and smirks. You don’t even remember feeling this way on dates with your husband. Oh, your husband…

"What are we doing?" You sighed.

"Hmm?" Steve sipped his drink. "I’m drinking coffee and you are supposed to be working. I think that’s what we’re doing."

"You know what I fucking mean."

Steve’s eyes widened at your outburst. You never swore around anyone, not even in your own home, so to do it here and out… Well, there was a new tone approaching the table.

Silently, he moved your drinks out of the way and leaned his elbows on the table. Shifting probably as close as the table would allow, he looked you dead in the eyes and asked, "Why did you knock on my door?"

"I… Well, I’m—,"

Words were tumbling in your brain like crazy as if that was any sort of shock. You couldn’t keep yourself together today. You could feel him all over you yet again.

"You feel it," Steve whispered.

"Steve—,"

"It’s exciting and you like it,"

"Steve, really—,"

"I like it, too,"

God, make his words stop. You wanted to scream. Everything was burning on you. From the words in your ears to his eyes on your figure. You felt the roots from his glances digging deeper and deeper and any hope of hiding it was flying out the window.

You took a deep breath and raised your hands in defeat. "Please."

What? What were you even asking—begging—for? A release? Someone to take your words away? Steve to ask you to run away or keep this in a secret rush?

"You do," He whispered and there was nothing that could confirm it like your hesitant silence. "But your husband—,"

"He can’t know," you shot back. If he ever caught wind there was no telling what could happen. He was a soft soul on the surface but it takes one spark to start a fire and fires can burn down a home.

Steve sighed and leaned back in his seat. "Calm down, we haven’t even done anything."

"But the feelings," you whispered. It was your turn to leave him bewildered. "The feels and falling consume everything. Don’t you think that’s worse than something physical? It’s soul and bones deep."

"I mean that much to you?"

"You’re everywhere."

You could tell that hit him. Heck, the admission even took you by surprise—and it was your admission.

Everything suddenly felt so much dirtier than one-night stands. This man hadn’t even properly touched you and yet, at the same time, he had touched so much.

"You mean this?"

"I wish I didn’t."

Steve scoffed, playing with the rim of his coffee cup. "You don’t know what you’re doing."

Sighing, you closed your laptop and said to hell with these reports. Your day was flowing and you promised to go with it.

Throwing everything back together in your bag, you looked back at him. "But I do, Steve."

At his name falling off your lips, his eyes abruptly met yours. After a beat, his hand reached for yours and you felt the weighted pain slowly drift away. It was as peaceful and forbidden as you had expected. You didn’t think you wanted to be anywhere else.

"You’re everywhere for me, too." You could cry at those words but he continued. "Like ivy growing everywhere, darling. I go out on limbs to see you."

"Ivy," you repeated. "Just like ivy."

Steve gripped your hand tighter, "And, baby, I’m covered in you."

Your jaw dropped. Pulling your hand away, you mumbled, "He’ll burn us to the ground if he ever finds out."

Steve shrugged, a suggestive smirk working on his lips—a wild yet dreamy contrast to the man you saw a few seconds ago. "I’ve been known to keep a few secrets."

[sleepy-apparition]

New Feelings Unbound (Shenhe x Reader)

WARNINGS:None

A/N: Hi there! This is my first time writing and publishing something, so it won’t be great. Also, the title says ‘x reader’, but the relationship is platonic(for now). Word Count: 1.793

Shenhe has always found it hard to connect with other people. Even when she was still a little girl not yet burdened with the curse of calamity, interacting with other people didn’t come easy. You can imagine then, the trouble she’d have after near decades of living in the mountains with only Adeptai and the odd illuminated beast to serve as company.

Learning how to fit into normal, human society is a rather difficult task. Her distant and indifferent nature, combined with her impressive strength, leads people to avoid her. Whether it is out of respect or fear varies from person to person. This certain type of loneliness that comes with being the odd one out, brings…. a small amount of ache to Shenhe’s heart. After all, she’s only human. Not that most people would think that.

If Shenhe is kind, people take that as confirmation that she’s an Adeptus and hail her. If Shenhe puts them in their place, then she gets condemned and called a witch. That’s how all her interactions with humans have gone. All, until she met a traveler roaming the mountains of Minlin.

She had first assumed you were lost, just another person who foolishly overestimated their sense of direction. No matter, she’s dealt with plenty like this before, what’s another? As the moon takes its place in the sky, Shenhe approaches.

“Pardon.” Her voice caused you to jump from where you were kneeled on the ground, spinning to face her immediately. It appears her tone was too harsh; she’ll have to adjust it.

“You are lost, correct? Here, I will guide you to- “

“I’m not lost.”

There was an awkward pause after you cut her off. It only lasted a moment, but it felt dragged out by the rather eye contact you’re making towards her. This was not an expected outcome. She wondered if she should question what you’re doing here or if she should just leave, but you beat her to it.

“I’m sorry! For interrupting, I mean. I am not lost; I came out this far in search of materials for my work.”

“Oh.” Another awkward pause. This is getting tiring. “So, you do not need my assistance?”

You looked to your feet and say, “Well, no…actually, could you help me find a place safe from hilichurls and the like? I’m gonna be in the mountains for a while, and I need a safe space to set up camp.”

Your request made her raise a brow. Were you not aware that the Adeptai made these mountains their homes? She asked you just that, and you reasoned that since you had no intention to disturb them, that it was fine to be up here.

“Are you an adeptus...? Ah, I never got your name.”

You state yours, then look at her expectantly. All this attention was…strange. You seemed rather interested in her. Having someone be this enthusiastic to get know her formed a weird feeling in her chest. Weird, but not unpleasant.

She realizes she’d been spacing out and quickly brings herself down to reality. “My name is Shenhe, And I am merely an Adeptus’s disciple. Now, follow me. I will lead you to a safe place to settle”

‘This feeling doesn’t matter’, she thought to herself. Like most who’ve come face to face with her, you’ll grow to hate her, and then you’ll leave. That’s just how it goes.

But you don’t grow to hate her. In fact, your interest in her person only seems to grow as you spend more time together. And oh, do you prefer your time to be spent together.

At first, it was casual. Casual, but practical. Things like, ‘Why don’t you stay longer for me to make you food? It’s the least I could do for you.’, or ‘Would you mind showing me my way around the mountain? I’m not quite used to them yet.’, were common phrases on your lips. You were straightforward about your needs and wants, she quite enjoyed that about you.

Actually, there was a lot she found enjoyable when she was around you. Ability to make herbs tasteful aside, Shenhe finds that being around you is an easy de-stressor. Your work, and living style, she presumes, is rather simple. Not always easy, but simple. “I’m out here on commission,” you explain on one slow afternoon, skipping a rock across the lake the two of you stopped to rest at, “Some novelist wanted me to stay here for a period, and document what the great mountains Liyue were really like. For a new book I guess.”

“What’s there to document about a mountain? It’s essentially a giant rock.” Shenhe states off to the side, adjusting her braid that came loose during a treasure hoarder raid. This novelist sounds both dull-minded and indolent to Shenhe. To both not be able to think of the environment a mountain would have and being unwilling to experience it yourself, doesn’t make for a very inspired person in her eyes.

You just shrug and respond, “Yeah, I suppose. I didn’t accept the first time because I thought it was a scam. But then one of the Guild's trade routes got blocked right as a couple restaurants sent out commissions asking for someone to bring them food supplies.” You pause and move from sitting on a rock to the ground closer to Shenhe.

“Since both commissions required me to be at same place, I decided to take up the novelist on his offer. What’s a little journaling to fill some spare time? If it doesn’t end up being a scam, then great! Double pay! If it does…I’ll find a way to my money out of him, somehow.”

Silence fills the air after your last comment, so you assume Shenhe has nothing else to say. You both just sit there for a minute and gaze at the scenery in front of you. Then you see Shenhe turn to you out of the corner of your eye. You turn to her as well, curious about what she’s doing, and are met the most serious expression you have ever seen someone make in your life.

She puts one hand over her chest and begins talking, “Materialistic things such as money and mora have no meaning to me. However, common folk require it live healthy, stable lives.” The hand over her chest clenches into a fist. “With that in mind, anyone who dares trick you into wasting your time will surely regret doing so when they’re met with the sharp end of my polearm.”

Her tangent ends, and her former rigid posture goes slack as she waits for a response. You on the other hand, are staring slack jawed at her. Did Shenhe really just propose murder? In completely seriousness? It finally registers in your head that yes, she did, and you respond at quickly as you can at that point.

“Um, please do not kill anyone just for scamming me! Or at all, preferably.”

“Hmm? But is not most effective to remove the root of the problem completely?”

“I mean-Yes, but murder is against the law!” You yell out. Shenhe looks at you questioningly, “The law?” she says. Oh boy.

 It was a hot day in Liyue, like many others, but today was a bit different. Shenhe wanted you to come up Mt. Aozang with her, to either teach you to fight or to watch her fight. Her phrasing made it unclear.

You were initially excited when she invited you to her to come with her. She was taking you to what was essentially her home! But now, two hours into a three-hour long hike, you justifiably began to have second thoughts. And it’s already getting a bit harder to breathe, so you even want to imagine what it’s like at the summit.

Shenhe isn’t breaking a sweat, expected from someone whose lived most of their life up here. Sighing, you speak up, “Why did you want me to come along again? I didn’t catch your explanation.”

Shenhe looks at you questioningly, “The law?” she says. Oh boy.

She doesn’t even slow down when she responds, “You mentioned being paranoid due to your lack of self-defense; I’m bringing you up here to teach you what I’ve learned from my master.”

An easy solution, she thinks. Something she can help with. Gathering aside, most of your work involves a of trade routes and specifics about people she doesn’t know, so she’s glad to finally be able to repay your kindness with by teaching you a skill that will most definitely be useful.

Behind her, you groan. “You know, I’m sure there are friends who brawl with each other for fun, but I don’t think I could take a single hit from and still be able to stand.”

She halts faster than you can realize, and you bump into her. “Is everything alright?” You ask. You sound worried. She turns around to face you fully.

“Sorry. Yes, everything’s fine.” Despite her reassurance, she stands there in deep thought. It’s kind of strange to see her like this.

“…Did you forget something and just now remembered that you forgot? Or…was it something I said?” She shakes her head, but other than that doesn’t respond.

She bites her lip unceremoniously then speaks again, “You consider us to be friends...?”

You falter, “Are we not?” You’re a more than a bit crushed, and about to apologize for assuming

when Shenhe speaks up again.

“No-I mean yes, I also consider you to be very dear to me, and I hold you in high regard. It’s just…” ‘Just that I have no knowledge on how to be a good member of society, let alone a good enough friend for you’ Is what comes to mind, but Shenhe doesn’t say it. Not like that, at least.

“I have no prior companions from the mortal realm, nor do I have any knowledge in the realm of friendship.” Shenhe sucks in a shaky breath, “Despite this, I quite like the title of ‘friend’. And I am more than willing to learn about it. For you.”

You’re left stunned. What can you say? You were never expecting such a heartfelt confession from her. A moment passes without you saying anything, and Shenhe starts to regret saying anything. Before she can turn around and write it off, though, you grab her hand. Intertwining your fingers together, you bring pair of your locked hands into view and smile.

“Thank you, truly. And know that all the work you do is appreciated.” You bring your hands back down to your sides.

Those words leave Shenhe feeling…lighter. As if the heavy ropes that restricted her emotions had loosened. Instead of the usual numbness she felt, she was…happy.

The two of you walked up the rest of the mountain hand in hand.

[missmaywemeetagain]

PINK SCARF AND LIFE UPDATES

Hello my babies! I wanted to jump on and give you some updates since I know I’ve not been posting/responding much since PS ended…

The long and the short of it is that I’ve been rather overwhelmed. Life is being A LOT. One of my sisters is very, very ill with late stage cancer and we are currently gearing up for her to (hopefully) get a stem cell transplant within the next month. This process is very involved and complex and scary and it’s one of those things that could just as easily kill her as make her better. This coupled with the family dynamics involved as we all try to navigate the situation has been emotionally exhausting.

In addition to that, I started temping back at my old job a couple weeks ago which is not what I wanted to do, but I gotta pay the bills, but it means my time is more limited and I’m way tired cuz my stamina is for shit lol.

And whilst all that’s been happening, I did some research and discovered that there is no way I can publish Pink Scarf as is. *sobbing* Turns out after Elvis died, Tennessee had to create a law specifically for him to protect his rights and image posthumously. This includes using not just his image, but his name and likeness as well. All this meaning I could get sued if I publish, and I DEFINITELY do not want to invoke the wrath of EPE.

Needless to say, this made me very upset cuz I know how much y’all want Pink Scarf on your bookshelves.

HOWEVER, before we all slide into the pits of despair, I think I have come up with a bit of a solution/compromise. I’m planning to rework PS into something just slightly different, changing some things that make it too specific to Elvis. I’ll likely have to change the title, too. But the plot and much of the writing will stay the same. But at least this way, I can still get it out to y’all in paperback form! (And lord knows I certainly can’t help who y’all picture in your heads while you read, soooooo…😉)

I know this is disappointing, y’all, and I’m so sorry I can’t make PS happen in published form as is. I am hoping that this new version is good enough for y’all to still want, and I’m gonna make it the best I can for ya. Honestly, I am thinking having something really close is better than having nothing at all. And of course, PS will still be online in its original form, so it’s not going away!

So, in the midst of all this insanity, I’ve started working on this newer version which is a project in its own right, but it’s taking time and my energy has been zapped with everything that’s going on. 💗🧣💗

For those who have asked about if there are any new Elvis fics in the works, the short answer is yes! I have a post-army fic that I am verrrrryyy slowly working on. The vibe is different from Pink Scarf (more of a slow burn), but I hope y’all will still enjoy it!

Anyway, thank you as always for your support and I’m sorry I haven’t delved into answering all your wonderful asks and comments. I very much appreciate them, I’m just a bit depleted at the moment. I’m still lurking around, just maybe not as active for the time being. But maybe I could jump on Discord or something next weekend if that would be fun for people!

Love ya always 💗🧣💗

Madisyn 💜

[fromkenari]

Waterloo Letters #2: You are a dark sorcerer

You are a dark sorcerer Henry hwales@kensingtonemail.com                6/8/20 3:23 PM to A Alex, I can’t think of a single other way to start this email except to say, and I do hope you will forgive both my language and my utter lack of restraint: You are so fucking beautiful. I’ve been useless for a week, driven around for appearances and meetings, lucky if I’ve made a single meaningful contribution to any of them. How is a man to get anything done knowing Alex Claremont-Diaz is out there on the loose? I am driven to distraction. It’s all bloody useless because when I’m not thinking about your face, I’m thinking about your arse or your hands or your smart mouth. I suspect the latter is what got me into this predicament in the first place. Nobody’s ever got the nerve to be cheeky to a prince, except you. The moment you first called me a prick, my fate was sealed. O, fathers of my bloodline! O, ye kings of olde! Take this crown from me, bury me in my ancestral soil. If only you had known the mighty work of thine loins would be undone by a gay heir who likes it when American boys with chin dimples are mean to him. Actually, remember those gay kings I mentioned? I feel that James I, who fell madly in love with a very fit and exceptionally dim knight at a tilting match and immediately made him a gentleman of the bedchamber (a real title), would take mercy upon my particular plight. I’ll be damned but I miss you. x Henry

Re: You are a dark sorcerer A agcd@eclare45.com                6/8/20 5:02 PM to Henry H, Are you implying that you’re James I and I’m some hot, dumb jock? I’m more than fantastic bone structure and an ass you can bounce a quarter on, Henry!!!! Don’t apologize for calling me pretty. Because then you’re putting me in a position where I have to apologize for saying you blew my fucking mind in LA and I’m gonna die if it doesn’t happen again soon. How’s that for lack of restraint, huh? You really wanna play that game with me? Listen: I’ll fly to London right now and pull you out of whatever pointless meeting you’re in and make you admit how much you love it when I call you “baby.” I’ll take you apart with my teeth, sweetheart. xoxo A

Re: You are a dark sorcerer Henry hwales@kensingtonemail.com                6/8/20 7:21 PM to A Alex, You know, when you go to Oxford to get a degree in English literature, as I have, people always want to know who your favorite English author is. The press team compiled a list of acceptable answers. They wanted a realist, so I suggested George Eliot—no, Eliot was actually Mary Anne Evans under a pen name, not a strong male author. They wanted one of the inventors of the English novel, so I suggested Daniel Defoe—no, he was a dissenter from the Church of England. At one point, I threw out Jonathan Swift just to watch the collective coronary they had at the thought of an Irish political satirist. In the end they picked Dickens, which is hilarious. They wanted something less fruity than the truth, but truly, what is gayer than a woman who languishes away in a crumbling mansion wearing her wedding gown every day of her life, for the drama? The fruity truth: My favorite English author is Jane Austen. So, to borrow a passage from Sense and Sensibility: “You want nothing but patience—or give it a more fascinating name, call it hope.” To paraphrase: I hope to see you put your green American money where your filthy mouth is soon. Yours in sexual frustration, Henry

McQuiston, Casey. Red, White & Royal Blue: A Novel (pp. 202-205). St. Martin's Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

[j2zara]

🍄🧭🖍️❤️ (second kudos for… aw man I was gonna say Loversverse but then I thought about Gorgug MCAT thesis so ALL OF THEM!!!! I adore them all so much!!!!)

🍄Decriscribe your wip/one of your wips in the format of “___ + ___ =___”

Hm….. I’m cheating b/c i haven’t started it yet but i genuinely plan to at some point but

Eternal Sunshine + The Scottish Play = LJ3 LSOP murdercouple duo scheme to steal Porter’s godhood and ascend Ellie

🧭An alternative title to your/ one of your WIP(s)?

I won’t say what WIPs bc some of these are Alts for things i’ve already published but i might go back and use them for upcoming stuff but i also feel like they’re alts for reason, none of them feel quite right:

I despise my rotten mind (and how much it worships you)

Don’t think we can be friends (‘cause you’re too pretty)

something about him (is made for somebody like me)

and think of me fondly (when your hands are on her)

Something in your touch (felt shockingly familiar)

Don’t forget to kiss me (or else you’ll have to miss me)

🖍Post Any sentence from your wip

Yippeee take something from LJ3Porter!

J4 moans, tucking her face into Porter's shoulder. “I ruin everything.” “If it makes you feel any better,” says J3, and there’s the reassuring brush of his hand against her leg—“I think always ruining everything is part of your charm.”

I... i did change a pronoun to a name in this version just to clarify something lol.

❤️ aka second kudos

Thank you so much!!!! You're so sweet tbh it still does mean a lot to hear that, like for real. I am cringefail bc the loversverse is close to my heart, this is what i get for being so invested in starbreaker and its derivatives, so when anyone says anything at all its like :')

and its always like. So funny yet nice to hear someone liked Tell Me How aka gorgug mcat thesis, and it is funny that me calling it Gorgug MCAT Thesis b/c that's what it is in my brain to me is like. Not just what it is to only me anymore. Anyway. I do think it's decent! it's just not like—a thing i agonized over to get Perfect well. "perfect" like so many other wips nor is it ship ship content so like its surprising and yet like flattering to get that like. Oh this was impactful for someone etc etc.

[the-traveling-poet]

🧃 🍬 🔪 🍦 ☁️

thanks for the asks anon!

🧃~ “Share some personal lore you never posted about before.”

Here’s some fun personal lore for y’all!

I once nearly passed out in a Chili’s bathroom stall after proving a bet that I could, in fact, chug a full bottle of wine, a large margarita, and then a pack of Mike’s Hard Lemonades in an hr.

I won the bet and was carried out of the establishment. I was 19.

🍬~ “Post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character.”

AOT cause that’s my blog theme; Armin x Annie is a rushed ship. Not a fan. I understand it, but still. Not a fan.

🔪~ “What's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?”

Most memorable search I recall was looking up ‘how fast would someone bleed out when stabbed in the stomach.’

This was years ago for an LOTR fic I was writing, and apparently the answer varies on multiple circumstances/situations!

🍦~ “Name three good things about a character you hate.”

Again, AOT; Floch.

1. Dude’s loyalty is to be heavily admired.

2. Bro is RESILIENT. Hanging onto the boat after getting shot and no doubt exhausted from the previous battle? Goddamn.

3. I’m struggling here but uhhh…He became a disciplined soldier after witnessing his beloved Commander’s demise. He always fought for what he believed in (even if it was wrong) and he stood his mf ground.

☁️~ “What made you choose your username?”

Well, when I was like 12? 13? I wanted nothing more to become a published author. And “The Traveling Poet” was gonna be my book title!

I still want to one day, and maybe I’ll continue my past original ideas with my username as the title!

Feel free to ask more questions!

[ichijager13]

Of love, books and your smile

pairings : Eren x reader (Jean x reader, Eren x Historia)

Modern AU, aged-up characters, strangers to lovers, falling in love, fluff

Summary:   His name was on every book you borrowed. you have even made a habit of looking for it eacht time you chose one. Eren Jager a combination of letters you grew familiar with, but what happens when you finally meet the man in question.  

You can find the links of the other chapters here

A/N: this was previously published on AO3, the story is inspired   by seiji's confession from whisper of the hearts.

Jean shippers I’m terribly sorry xD  

Chapter VIII: First time

"You're saying you did it at his parents' place". Pieck squealed. "In his bedroom, childhood bedroom, your first time". You slowly nodded wearing a tight lip smile.

"Damn that must have been hot". Annie muttered pouring herself another glass of wine. "Don't act like you've never done it there with Porco".

"But not our first time". Pieck argued.

"Why not?" The blond shrugged.

Two weeks after you invited him over for dinner you met at the library. "Hello there, found something interesting?" you heard him saying.

"Hi Eren, yeah these two". You answered showing him the books you picked today.

"I've read this one". He held a hard-cover edition of the Prague cemetery. "You sure have good taste in literature". He pecked your temple. "But I've never heard of this author. When the Dawn Breaks, such a beautiful title".

"Yes, I found it on Pinterest. It was the title that attracted me at first and when I googled it, I found it might be an interesting story". You tried to see the titles of the books he picked. "What about you?"

"Only medical encyclopedias for this time". He handed you back the book. "Have you eaten?" He asked while you stood in line to check the books you picked. "Do you wanna grab something to eat?" he followed when you shook your head.

"Yeah sure". You left the library with his hand propped around your shoulder.

"By the way, mom is inviting you this weekend. We'll spend the whole weekend there if it doesn't bother you". he spoke when you were on the way back to your workplace. Not receiving an answer, he threw looks your way. "Don't worry, I'm positive she will love you". he added smiling.

That's how you found yourself putting your travel bag in Eren's car trunk before hitting the road to his hometown. Three hours later, you were standing behind him at the entrance of the house he grew up in.

"Mom, we're home". He called while taking off his jacket. "You can leave your shoes on". He said turning to you. "It's gonna be alright". He said in a soft tone before placing a peck on your forehead.

"Welcome home darling, it's been a while". A beautiful brunette appeared smiling. "Hello, nice to meet you. I can see you weren't exaggerating, she is beautiful".

"Good evening, madam, I'm pleased to meet you".

"Please, no formalities, just call me Carla. I hope my hotheaded boy is being nice to you". The confused look you wore made her laughter echo in the living room. "Let me tell you, he hasn't always been this calm".

"Mom, can you leave the embarrassing comments 'til later". He groaned.

"Seig and Jelena will arrive in any minute, go get your stuff upstairs before they arrive". The green-eyed man nodded before taking both of your bags. "How about a coffee sweetheart?" Carla suggested.

"I would love to". You answered handing her a box containing the black forest cake you made yesterday.

"Thank you, there was no need to bother yourself".

"It's nothing". You said a bright smile curving your lips.

"He surely wasn't exaggerating when he described your smile either. You do have an angelic smile". Her comment made you blush from head to toe.

Before dinner, you went upstairs and changed into a more formal clothing. You picked a gray boat neckline long-sleeved dress and did your hair in a low loose bun. While he wore a light grey dress shirt and navy pants.

You were in his childhood bedroom about to get undressed when you heard the door crack open. "You looked stunning tonight". Eren hummed against your ear before leaving light kisses along your neck.

His hands wrapped around your waist hugging you from behind. "Eren". You whispered feeling nervous.

When your eyes locked, both staring at your reflection in the mirror, you felt your body temperature increase. "I couldn't get my eyes off you during the whole dinner". His lips were now traveling along your shoulder. He paused planting his teeth there causing you to gasp. "I had to summon all of my forces to not pin you against the wall and ruin that lipstick". He followed while unzipping your dress. You slowly closed your eyes feeling his breath caressing your skin.

As your dress fell to the floor, Eren's lips and palms run all over your body while you stood there feeling the cold night breeze and Eren’s hands caressing your burning skin. You lost the notion of time and space; all you were aware of was his proximity and the heat radiating from deep inside of you.

When you came back to yourself, you found yourself laying on his bed with him on top of you. "I've been waiting for this for so long". He whispered against your lips before capturing them for another passionate kiss. With half-lidded eyes, you looked up at him placing a hand on the back of his neck. His hand started going down slowly, caressing your breast and your hips before grabbing the fat of your thigh. Your other hand started unbuttoning his shirt. It felt like you were in a dream, your mind was fuzzy and your ears were buzzing. You too spent your days after the night he stayed at your place thinking about how it feels like to have him inside you. feeling his heartbeat and breathing rate become faster as you moved in harmony.

You pressed your lips to his thick neck and started biting and sucking gently while he shrugged off his shirt. His hands back on your body he freed one breast and teased your nipple with his finger pad. The moment he ceased it with his teeth you released a deep cry that made him twitch in his pants.

With trembling hands, you reached for his belt, unbuckled it, and dragged his pant and underwear down. Not wanting to waste another minute he buried himself inside you once the last pieces of clothing covering you were off. with fast thrusts and hips moving in synch with him, you were both so desperate to feel the other's presence. once you came down from your cloud of pleasure you took things slowly. You dedicated every second of that night to explore and get to know each other's bodies. Outside of the first round, Eren's gestures were slow and gentle, his kisses made you feel alive again and his touch made you forget how to breathe properly, how to sort out your thoughts and process what was happening. The amount of effort you needed to make to hold back your moans and cries each time he made you come undone was beyond your imagination.

"Why are you blushing?" Annie scoffed watching your face turn red from the memory of your first night there.

"Were you even listening?" Pieck questioned you frowning.

"I highly doubt". Annie joked. "I have a feeling that night is still haunting her". You looked down focusing on your fingers messing with the hem of your blouse.

It wasn't until late that you curled up against him feeling exhausted. "Did I go too hard on you?" You heard him asking, one hand buried in your hair but you were too fucked up to make up an answer. Instead, you nestled your face in the crook of his neck and listened quietly to the wind going through the trees in the backyard gently. "I'm sorry darling, I just couldn't stop". He let out laughing. minutes later you were fast asleep. Watching you sleep he mused. "Since the first time my eyes landed on you, I tried to imagine what you are like. The things you love, what makes you laugh, your thoughts on the books we read, and what causes you to smile. I sort of imagined what your personality would be like based on the books you picked each time and the warmth of your smile. And during all this time I never paused to think if you are maybe different from how I pictured you. I never dared consider that maybe the woman that you are has nothing in common with the woman I made up. but when I ran into you that Saturday morning on my way home, after the two hours we spent talking, I realized that I was right. you are exactly as I imagined you. a nice person with a big and kind smile and a pure heart". He pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead. "Being with you feels like a dream, a dream that I don't want to wake up from. Please, don't wake me up from this dream".

"I said Porco got promoted and we're throwing a small party this weekend to celebrate it".

"Ah, congratulations". Your voice felt so distant and faint.

"Make sure to tell Eren he is invited as well. Don't you dare forget it".

"I won't". you rose your hands frowning.

The next morning, still half asleep a huge grin lightened your face when you realized you were in Eren's arms. Feeling the softness of the bedsheet underneath you, you moved closer to him. you gently brushed your nose against his before placing your lips on top of his. When you pulled back, you were met with gorgeous jade eyes staring at you softly.

"Good morning beautiful". His voice was drowsy and so low making it sound so sexy.

"Good morning handsome". He rolled to his side before cupping your face. The kiss that followed felt like a scene that came out of an old Hollywood movie.

Feeling you smiling against his lips he pulled away. "I love seeing you smiling". He pressed another kiss to your lips. "I promise I'll do my best to always draw a smile on your face". His words made you feel all sorts of beautiful feelings and made your smile grow bigger. You stayed there enjoying each other's company in silence before he spoke again, about a half hour later. "How about we go downstairs for breakfast?"

"So, how did it go?" Annie inquired.

"Great, he grew up in a calm and beautiful town. His mother is so nice and her cooking is amazing. I also met his half-brother and his wife. He is a doctor as well". You answered. "His brother is so funny, always teasing Eren and making sarcastic comments". Your smile made both of your friends happy.

"Make sure you bring her back". Carla said watching her son loading your bags in the trunk. "You know what, don't wait for him, you can come whenever you want. You are always welcome".

"Thank you so much". You replied smiling before you joined your boyfriend.

"I love her, she's a nice girl, don't you think honey". Carla asked her husband once she closed the door. "He seems happy, I hope things work out between them".

[1117feverlessdreams]

Welcome to 1117feverlessdreams! A place where you can let free the wildest fantasies of your dreams!

*ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚ * ੈ✩‧₊ *ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚ *

I decided upon the name when I was thinking about the first song I listened by myself when my friend recommended me to Ateez, Star1117. 🗣️

Something had drawn me to it, the title sounded like it was gonna be beautiful and something I’d enjoy, and my instincts were right. 🧞‍♂️

As I listened to the song, I thought, who could they be talking about? They sound like they really love this person. (even though I didn’t know what the hell they were saying LMFAO) 🥶

But the melody and they way they sang so softly and belted out those notes, I knew it was a strong song with deep emotion, and the “forever you are my star” line made me think it was about someone they really cared for. 😭

I immediately searched the songs meaning and saw it was for their fans. I never got into K-pop fully but I always wanted to and had a few songs on my playlist. I decided Ateez was the first group I was gonna Stan based on that song alone. I wanted to be part of a fandom whose artist love their fans so dearly that they made a song dedicated to them. 💙

Feverless came from another Ateez song, it just came to mind and I wanted to include it. 👨‍🎤 I had to add less because it emphasizes the wish of my stories to have a pleasant experience rather than a bizarre/ disturbing one.

Dreams comes from me just being delusional lol. I tend to wander off out no where in my mind coming up with all kinds of scenarios. So much to the point it’s just a coping mechanism for my insomnia. 🐳

It actually helped in some ways. I can sleep peacefully now, maybe too much because I don’t ever wanna wake up. What can I say, I guess I have an addiction. 🌀

Plus I don’t think it’s going away anytime soon so enjoy the ride 🚙

The theme for my page is a fantasy dream world where all your desires come true (i.e. requests or messages), the theme color being blue. The color blue represents calmness, imagination, and spirituality. 🚹

I want to make my page for my black!readers because we really don’t get a lot of representation 🥲🥲🥲

BUT sometimes I might write generally, so just to be clear I’m not discriminating and I want to include everyone!

BUT for my black!readers just know that this is a safe space 💙

PLEASE DO NOT COPY MY ORIGINAL WORKS, reblogs are appreciated and accepted. Stealing and modifying my work or publishing out on other platforms is not. 🖌️

Lastly I will also be attaching to music to each of my works to get y’all in the mood ( ͡❛ 👅 ͡❛) I love music, I literally can not live without it just like I can’t live without my “exciting imagination”. Also I thought it would be a fun addition, so I hope y’all don’t mind! 😰

* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚ * ੈ✩‧₊ * ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚ *

All About Me!

Name: NYX (a picking of my choosing after the goddess of night)

Age: 19- yes I am an adult and therefore make content for other adults, MINORS DNI 🔞

Country: ‘Merica 🤠🔫🔫 🦅🦅🦅

Ethnicity: African-American Gyal 💁🏾‍♀️

Favs: Ateez (ult) Stray Kids, P1Harmony, Enhyphen, Nct127, NCT DREAM, Twice, TXT, NewJeans, Red Velvet, Leehi, Got7, Seventeen.

(Imma be completely honest, I listen to the other groups music and I know some of the members, but Ateez is the only group I know really well. I’m trying my best to get involved in other groups but I love my boys so much!!!)

Moots: They’re non- existent but that’s because they don’t know I exist yet! If you wanna be moots don’t be shy, I won’t bite 😭.

* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚ * ੈ✩‧₊ * ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚ *

[maddenkateee]

From The Sidelines

a personal essay.

My alarm wakes me up at exactly 6:40 AM every morning. I yawn, sit up, and prepare myself to do the same thing I do every morning. I stand up, go to the bathroom, brush my teeth, wash my face, decide if it's a hair-up or hair-down day, and ponder why my face looks so weird today. I decide something's off with my appearance, and that means the whole day is gonna be messed up already. I go back to my room and decide what I’m gonna wear, and instead of thinking about what makes me feel confident and comfortable, I think about what everyone else is gonna be wearing today. I grab my phone and text my best friend a simple “what are u wearing td?”- she won’t think anything of it when she reads it and responds, assuming I’m just being indecisive again. As I completely empty out my dresser, the issue isn’t what I’m gonna wear anymore. It’s my body. I think about how everyone is probably going to be wearing shorts and a hoodie or leggings and a Lululemon top and how all that I am doesn’t fit nicely into crop tops. When my phone chimes with a response, I grab it reluctantly- no longer wanting a response because I know, I know, I know that whatever she’s wearing won’t look the same on me. When she responds with a mirror picture of a gold hinge skirt and a tight shirt, I decide at that moment that I simply can not win. I decide on leggings and a hoodie like always, and I move to the bathroom to do my makeup and hair. When I’m doing my makeup, I can’t help but pull and grab at my cheeks and under my jawline, wishing I couldn’t feel the skin in my hands. I feel the all too familiar feeling in my stomach, staring at myself and seeing what seems like a stranger. I no longer see myself, but a reflection of others within me. I don’t have my own voice, but only what others have spoken to my rotten ears. I no longer have my own mind, for my brain is simply just a copy of what I have been conditioned to believe is acceptable, normal, cool, and average. I rethink my life and everything around me. Every decision I make is based on other people. I realize I have taken a stance from the sidelines on my own life. I am in the bleachers, watching myself try so hard to be someone I’m not, with hot tears stinging my cheeks and a sore heart. In a room full of people, I am watching the world from the sidelines. I am on the outskirts, smiling at the world from an outsider's perspective. Realizing all of this at once almost feels like motion sickness, realizing that I am here right now, as a real person. I am not forced to believe anything. I can be who I am. I can put a meaning to my name and be whoever my name calls. I can draw my own outline. The mirror now feels powerful to me rather than repulsive. As I walk out the door and to the car, I am no longer a side character in my own film. I am no longer on the sidelines, but I am on the field. I’m drawing the game plans. I am free. As we grow up, I encourage you not to take a backseat to the world around you. Get behind the wheel and take control. We will never be this age, in this exact moment, or even with the same people, ever again. Live in the moment, the right here and right now.

NOTES!!

-THE REFERENCES ARE PURPOSEFUL.

-The title and essay itself is heavily inspired by "Sidelines" by Phoebe Bridgers.

-The references in here are based off Phoebe Bridgers, tpobawf, and How To Never Stop Being Sad by dandelion hands.

-this is my first time ever publishing an essay by me publicly and with my name attached.. EEK. i wrote this at 12AM (currently 1:10) so if it's not great I'm sorry! posting for progress and CONSTRUCTIVE criticism!!

[milenadelgadolaborde]

Hunger games 1: Reaction and Thoughts

[BEWARE THE SPOILERS!!!!]

Alright book munchers, buckle the fuck up bc we’re about to reread the hunger games, here we go. Some context for starters, I read the series for the first time when I was like 9ish/10 and I remember it being one of the very best dystopias I had read at the time (and honestly still one of the best in that genre, up there with the Uglies series (which I have yet to finish) and the maze runner). I remember it being so complex and how every little detail built up to this horrifying picture of this oppressive society right?

Now that the new book and movie has come out, I thought it would be cool to reread the series before reading that book (mostly so I can remember more than just the biggest plot points of the series). I’m interested in seeing how the books hit different as an adult, especially one who has more of an understanding and experience with things like discrimination and oppression, and other similar ‘systems’ that I understand better now.

Very very much looking forward to it so let’s get munchin

——-

Book 1: the hunger games

Published in 2008 (we got the HG in the same year that Obama became president? I don’t remember everything from when I was younger but I do remember that year was pretty wild for early 2000s standards)(Was it just me?)

*****So so many spoilers for the hunger games ahead, it’s been more than a decade but even so, if you haven’t read it yet and don’t want spoilers avoid below bc we’re gonna get into the thick of it

Part 1: the tributes

(Apparently instead of chapter titles there are just 3 parts - whatever happened to chapter titles man?)

Chapter 1:

First line: “When I wake up, the other side of the bed is cold.” Pretty unassuming but kinda gives a certain vibe that matches the series (?)

Second line: “My fingers stretch out, seeking Prim’s warmth but finding only the rough canvas cover of the mattress.”

My soul is already braced for pain 😂

—

It’s strange, bc it’s been a minute since I’ve read something in first pov // I’m so used to 3rd person past tense

——-

“Even though it was years ago, I think he still remembers how I tried to drown him in a bucket”

Jeez Kat

“The Seam” = ominous

——

“Electrified or not, the fence has been successful at keeping the flesh-eaters out of District 12.”

Girl what? The what? I don’t remember this😳 is this the post apocalyptic part of the world? Honestly between zombie creatures and the hunger games I think I’d take my chances with the zombies. Though I wouldn’t be surprised if this was like a ‘oh the gov says there’s zombies out there’ but really they’re lying to keep the people inside kind of thing

——

““District Twelve. Where you can starve to death in safety,” I mutter.”

See this is what I’m talking about. The Symbolism and Ethical/ Moral /Philosophical questions of this series are Top Notch.

Muncher question: Would you choose to starve in safety of eat well in danger?

—-

“The mayor’s daughter, Madge, opens the door.” Even the mayors daughter has to put her name in? Brutal man

““No, it’s no one’s fault. Just the way it is,” says Gale.” Well, I wouldn’t say it’s no ones fault- I’d say it’s the capitol’s fault

—-

I have to ask myself- why the children? I get that it’s in order to show the brutality of this system but you would think that nothing would incite rebellion more than targeting the children- Aaahhhh my heart strings are already being pulled!

(I wonder how big every district is)

——-

“His (Gale) rages seem pointless to me, although I never say so.”

I think from the very beginning there’s this air of hopelessness that colors all of Kay’s monologue up until the reaping // I also think this quote is interesting with the future love triangle context

I do remember vaguely this thing of Gale always setting her off and Peeta being the one that calms her (?)

——-

The section at the reaping where the history of Panem is explained and why they take the tributes ,

B R U T A L

Then Prim is chosen- Oof, Big Oof

——-

Ch2:

“The odds had been entirely in her favor. But it hadn’t mattered.”

“So instead of acknowledging applause, I stand there unmoving while they take part in the boldest form of dissent they can manage. Silence. Which says we do not agree. We do not condone. All of this is wrong.”

——-

“Haymitch plummets off the stage and knocks himself unconscious.”

I don’t remember Haymitch being this much of a mess but omg can you blame him? This poor man has to watch the kids he trains every year be murdered brutally and is sent back again and again every year - probably reliving his own time in the games too

My face as I read the entire book: 😬😬😬

—-

“Family devotion only goes so far for most people on reaping day.”

Also F Peeta’s brothers man // I mean I 100% get it but P’s the protag so allow me to be pissed on his behalf 😂

—-

Also I’m actually interested in reading this Treaty of Treason thing- does anybody else also experience wanting to get so deep into the lore and paperwork of a world? Like I remember with HP wanting to actually read Hogwarts textbooks and stuff

——-

And definitely Fuck P’s mother (if that’s who hit him)

——-

Ch3:

So Madge gives her a pin - is it the mocking jay pin? Ok it is -Does something bad happen to madge? Now when anyone does anything nice for the protags I just expect them to die horribly later

——

“But I hate Effie Trinket’s comment so much I make a point of eating the rest of my meal with my fingers. Then I wipe my hands on the tablecloth.”

Yeah! There’s our rebel!!!! F etiquette!

——-

Ch4:

“So I decide, from this moment on, to have as little as possible to do with the baker’s son.”

That’s gonna be a little hard babe, considering the plot

—

Having a bunch of children fight to the death in a brutal fight to live is one thing, but having them dress up like it’s a fashion show beforehand is sickening y’all

I don’t remember being this disturbed by the ages when I was younger bc I was under twelve and also this age range seems to be the set age for heroes in stories but now that I’m 22, like I’m closer to being a decade older than the oldest of these kids than not - and I still consider myself Super Young //

Like I remember feeling bad for the protags but now I’m like “Who let these babies fight?”

——

“Suddenly he (Peeta) lashes out at the glass in Haymitch’s hand.”

Oh go off King

This man is so unassuming at first but so cunning *chefs kiss*

——

Ch5:

“What must it be like, I wonder, to live in a world where food appears at the press of a button?”

——-

“Our horses pull our chariot right up to President Snow’s mansion”

It is so easy to absolutely loathe this guy - I’m genuinely curious about the new book which is apparently about him and his backstory

——-

Katniss: Peeta is being nice to me? He must be planning on how to murder me. There’s no other reason he would do that

Peeta: 😍

——-

Ch6:

The Avox thing is so fucking disturbing man

——-

Ch7:

P and K both underrating themselves only to have the other highlight their greatest skills for Haymitch is so adorable- I love them

—-

Not Rue - I’m already crying 😭

—-

Katniss shooting the Apple in the pigs mouth = iconic

——

Ch8:

Ch9:

Peeta with the *le gasp* plot twists in the interviews with Ceasar = also iconic

——-

Part 2: the games

Ch10:

Ch11:

Ch12:

Ch13:

Ch14:

Ch15:

I love Katniss and Rue as a duo even though it hurts my heart ☠️

Fuck! I’m already crying

Ch16:

Ch17:

Ch18:

The song? The song guys. Kill me now

I’m so sad - so extremely sad

“Then I realize . . . he was my first kill.”

Katniss not even realizing that the boy she killed in defense of Rue is the first time she’s taken a life until later 😭 the cruelty of it all

——

Plot twist: the rule change *le gasp*

—-

Part 3: the victor

Ch19

Ch 20

Ch21

Ch22

The whole scene between P and K getting more intimate fulfills the part of me that ships them but the whole scene has a disturbing background feeling bc the entire time they’re both also aware they are on screen and have to play it up in order to get food. Like I want them to get together but ☹️

——-

“I know I’ll never marry, never risk bringing a child into the world.”

Yeah what’s stopping the districts from just not having kids? Like ppl irl are not having as many kids just because prices are going up and also some other risks but nothing like the hunger games - I would just not have kids // what would the capital do then? They’re completely dependent on work from the districts

——-

Ch24:

Ch25:

Cato’s death scene is the worst of the disturbingness- the mutants, the way it’s drawn out - it’s a no from me

Ch26:

When Katniss lifts her bow against Peeta on instinct and drops in? The berries: a little Romeo and Juliet moment? Forcing the capitol to give up even a little bit of ground? Iconic

——-

“My mouth waters at the smell, but I place it carefully on the floor, not trusting anything so clean and pretty.”

Now them dealing with the ptsd and ramifications of it all - heartwrenching

—-

““Oh, they did a full body polish on you,” says Flavius enviously. “Not a flaw left on your skin.””

The absolute disgustingness of it all, of a capitol city that had endless food, resources, and ways to keep people young and flawless, not just allowing, but actively demanding the depravity of children being sent to the hunger games to die in increasingly brutal ways while their families watch, starving

I have no words

———

““But the Gamemakers wanted to alter you surgically.”

Like she’s a doll?!?! Oh hell to the no

She’s a teenager!!!! I’m frothing at the mouth y’all

——

“When I left the arena, when the trumpets played, I was supposed to be safe.”

The Dread.

——

Ch27:

Peeta finding out that Katniss was definitely hamming it up for the cameras- Ouch

——

alright guys, I’m ready for book 2!