#like it would be rlly sick to have her die after all that and would be hard on viewers who related to her mental health struggles

[kavehater]

Do I have to start saying not that anyone would care in that super duper passive aggressive way to guilt people into caring or what

[gay-dorito-dust]

May I request BootHill and Argenti with a crush who’s reckless and accidentally confessed due to a particularly bad injury?

Crush doesn’t care for getting injured at all and always brushes off their concerns when they get injured but one day they just get rlly badly hurt and when they try to do the usual

“I’m okay”

It just kinda snaps in the boys?

(Sorry if this is too much)

Boothill

‘You fudging idiot!’ Boothill screamed when he saw the massive gash on your side. ‘You’ve gone and gotten yourself hurt again!’

‘I’m okay.’ You said as casually as you could while trying not to wince as Boothill began to put pressure on your wound to prevent it from bleeding out further. The gash fucking killed but you weren’t about to let him know how much it hurt, you refused to as you’ve dealt with far worse.

You haven’t, actually, that was a fucking lie to begin with.

‘I’m okay’ they say.’ Boothill scoffs, ‘yeah right, you’ve only gone and done it now! For fork’s sake would it kill you to actually act like you want to fudging live for once?!’

He knew you were a reckless spirit for the moment you first met, you were someone who didn’t care how many scars would litter your skin, only caring about finishing the mission no matter how debilitating the pain was. At first he didn’t care to know your name nor your reasoning as to why you act the way you did, but when he started to feel something for you, that’s when he began to worry himself sick over you.

Boothill genuinely wondered whether or not you cared that you lived after each and every suicide mission, you couldn’t be mended or rebuilt like he could, you weren’t invincible as you’d like to this you were and Boothill could only hope that today served as a reminder of that.

Boothill didn’t want to lose you, he couldn’t bare it as he’s already lost his friends, family and his darling Arabella who’s smile so wide you could see the her gap tooth on full display. Arabella was just learning to walk when she was taken from him along with everyone else who meant everything to him; Revenge was his only motive and loosing you would only make him surrender to it a hell of lot faster.

‘If all you’re going to do is shout about how stupid I am then you can fuck off and leave me here to die since I’m such a idiot in your eyes, mr spaghetti western.’ You barked, hating Boothill’s unnecessary comments and hating the worried look within his eyes even more, it made you feel useless and pathetic.

Boothill looked at you as though you’ve grown a second head, lost on how that was the conclusion you came to, you must be delirious from the blood loss. ‘Fork me do I have to spell it out for you- I like you fudging dummy!’ He exclaimed. ‘I’m mad not because I hate you but because you’re hurt and I’m scared of loosing you darling!’ He chuckled humourlessly as he presses his forehead against yours, the one time where he was glad that his face was the last places where he could feel your warmth seep into him. ‘Your recklessness has me on the edge of insanity more than once sweetheart. I mean do you know just how much it hurt to see you like this? I might as well have gone on a tirade and hunt down every son of a nice lady who played a part in your scars.’

You remained in stunned silence.

This confession wasn’t something you were expecting from someone like Boothill, it made you wonder whether you were imaging this for yourself, and the reality was that he wasn’t actually here with you and you were indeed dying alone with no one to provide you company other then dead corpses waiting for you to join them. So in hopes of proving yourself wrong, you lifted a hand to his cheek, watched as he melted against it, his warmth seeping into your skin.

He was here.

Boothill was here and this was real, all this was real.

‘I like you too your silly cowboy.’ You whispered before pressing a tender kiss to his plush lips. A battlefield wasn’t a great place for a confession nor for love to blossom but if that was the case then why did it feel so right for the both of you in that moment.

Later you were taken to medical and Boothill, your official partner, went back to talking your ear off about how reckless you were, but would press kisses to your forehead and hands to let you know that he’ll take care of you from now on.

Argenti hated it whenever you came back from missions injured and your carelessness towards the scrapes and bruises that littered your body didn’t exactly help either.

‘I’m fine.’ You said after spraining an ankle.

‘I’ll live.’ You waved him off dismissively after hurting your side during a mission.

It seemed as though you never held yourself in the same regard as he did, and Argenti couldn’t help but feel his heart break the more and more he witness you disregard other people’s concern, acting though you had a paper cut rather then a wound that wound take you out of action for a good couple of weeks.

So when he found you with your back pressed up against a wall and a deep gash on your leg that made it hard for you to stand never less walk.

‘My beloved rose!’ He cried as he rushed to your side, setting aside his weapon as he inspected the wound.

‘I’m okay, it’s only a small gash.’ You told him but Argenti wasn’t about to hear it, not this time. He wasn’t going to allow you the chance to dismiss him when you were severely injured. So when he levelled you with a stare, you began to wish you could take back your words as seeing such a stern expression on a man as beautiful as Argenti was actually downright terrifying. ‘This is vastly different than a small gash, this is a serious injury that could alter your life’s trajectory for good if we treat it with such disregard as you have done with previous injuries.’ He told you with a seriousness that had you listen to him.

‘And why do you care?’ You asked.

‘I’ve always cared.’ Argenti replied straightforward, ‘every injury I’ve cared. I worried for your health, your well-being, both physical and mental, but you don’t seem to do the same and that pains me because you are so-‘

‘-reckless?’ You cut in, having heard the same thing from pretty much everyone and believing Argenti would be no different from them.

‘-beautiful.’ Argenti said and your breath caught in your throat. ‘You are so beautiful to me, my rose. I have found myself grown quite fond of you in a short amount of time that any pain caused to you might as well be my own.’ He finished as he saw the conflicting emotions within your eyes and prays that you could find the truth within his words.

‘Why?’ You asked. ‘What would a knight of beauty want with a reckless idiot like me?’

Argenti smiled softly. ‘You may be reckless but you are far from an idiot my dear, I like you a lot and I merely say this in fear of a future where I may never get the chance to do so for multiple reasons. Whether or not you accept is solely up to you.’ Argenti felt as though he had finally gotten a heavy weight off of his chest, but felt a pinch of anxiety when you didn’t respond after a period of time, and began to wonder whether this was a smart move on his behalf.

‘I always dreamed of having a knight in shining armour.’ You admitted, raising a hand to cup the back of his head. ‘But I didn’t think that dream would come true until you came along and I knew in that moment I would give you my heart and so much more.’ Argenti breathes a sigh of relief as he rests his forehead against your own, nuzzling your noses together briefly. ‘I’d be more than honoured of being your knight, if you’ll let me.’

You chuckled as you looked at him fondly. ‘I’d be more than happy to my cherry haired beauty.’ You replied as Argenti was quick to scoop you in his arms and carried you to the medics, who told you that you’d be out of action for quite a while and Argenti was more then happy to be your caregiver during that time, you couldn’t be more happier at the opportunity of being with your knight in shining armour.

[norrizzandpia]

okay so you know how oscar sleeps like anywhere, can we have some thing about how they claim they are friends but theres all these photos that lando has (or anyone really) of them two sleeping in the most random places and lando posts them as a joke (sorry if it doesnt make sense!!)

This request is 💋

Sleeping Buddies or Dating? (OP81)

Summary: Oscar and Y/n love to sleep next to each other. They don’t love each other. That’s it.

Warnings: Lando and the other drivers being menaces, language

y/nnn this is payback for making me think you have pics of me and oscar asleep together

Comments:

landonorris I LITERALLY DO???? YOUVE STARTED A WAR

- oscarpiastri lando….

- Mclarensgirly LEAK THEM LANDO

- ln4op81 plz. my bday is in a few days. that would be the best bday present.

- landonorris happy bday then

landonorris ALSO I LOOK SO FUCKING GOOD IN THIS IDK WHAT TF YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE DOING

- y/nnn you actually don’t stop being delulu

- oscarpiastri YOURE SPURRING HIM ON

—

landonorris this is for not shutting up 🫶🏻

Comments:

oscarpiastri THIS MANY????? EXIST??????

- landonorris yes.

- danielricciardo yes.

- logansargeant yes.

- alexalbon yes.

- charlesleclerc yes.

- y/nnn oh!

y/nnn were you silent or silenced?

ln4andop81 YOU ARE FUCKING KIDDING ME. AND THEY ARE STILL NOT TOGETHER??????

- mclarensgirly in my heart they are 😥

F1gossip they have to be dating no way you fall asleep like that in the second pic and are just friends

- f1fan2023 idk man they’ve done some questionable things in the past and stayed friends

- papayafan481 TRUEEEE like that one time Oscar said in an interview he spends nights at y/n’s all the time and they “get up to some fun” BROS GOTTA KNOWN WHAT THAT MEANS

- mclarennnnn ALSO when he won his first podium and ran up to her and KISSED HER CHEEK???? THATS THE BIGGEST MYSTERY OF F1 BC HE WAS SO CLOSE TO HER FUCKING LIPS. YOU CANNOT CONVINCE ME HE DIDNT KISS THE SIDE OF HER MOUTH AND REALIZED HE WAS ON LIVE TV SO GASLIT EVERYONE INTO THINKING HE KISSED HER CHEEK. HE KISSED HER. HE DID.

- f1fan2023 that moment is fs my roman empire. i think abt the logistics of that moment every day

—

logansargeant thought I’d hop on the train ;)

Comments:

y/nnn BRO I DIDNT DO SHIT TO YOU

- logansargeant i am SICK AND TIRED of hiding

- mclarensgirly sorry… HIDING WHAT????

- mclarennnnn HE KISSED HER ON LIVE TV.

oscarpiastri you got the audacity from where?

- logansargeant you.

- f1fan81 BYEEEEEE

- mclarensgirly LIGHT HIM UP AMERICAN BOY

- ln4andop81 WTF IS A KILOMETERRRRR??????

mclaren are we sensing a soft launch?

- oscarpiastri ADMIN.

- y/nnn UHHHHHHHHHHHHH

- mclarensgirly WHAT.

- ln4andop81 MY MANIFESTATIONS ARE COMING TRUE OMFG

- f1fan2023 i can die happy now (i am going to live out the rest of my days living for their relationship)

- landonorris oh shit.

—

oscarpiastri yes, i did kiss her on live tv and tried to gaslight everyone into thinking i kissed her cheek (it worked on all you bitches don’t lie)

Comments:

F1fan2023 WE WON YALL

mclarennnnn I WAS FUCKING RIGHT THIS WHOLE TIME I WAS FUCKING RIGHT HOLY SHIT

- oscarpiastri your comments were concerning me ngl

- y/nnn yea he thought you were going to expose us

landonorris this hard launch took way too fucking long omg

- y/nnn shut tf up bitch

mclaren we can die happily now 🥹

- mclarensgirly mclarens just like us fr

- oscarpiastri y/n and i no longer wish you death after you outed us

- mclaren NO LONGER?????? YOU DID AT ONE POINT???????

- y/nnn shhh, admin. “no longer”, that’s what you need to pay attention to

—

y/nnn he’s mine now bitches 👹

Comments:

oscarpiastri idk what your obsession is with these two pics

- y/nnn YOURE FUCKING HOT LEAVE ME ALONE

landonorris happy for you ig

- y/nnn I know the heartbreak must be painful

mclaren we would like to take the credit for dressing Oscar in the second pic

- y/nnn you deserve the world for putting him in that jacket.

mclarensgirly im rlly kicking and screaming tho

F1fan2023 i know i said i would die happy bc of this news but suddenly i hate the fact this man is off the market

- landonorris well that sucks bc pastry is sickeningly in love

[2plolohs]

The fact that after this paragraph I was already going fucking insane. Dude. Rosemary thoughts rose thoughts

The motherhood angst from all directions. The girlhood angst from all directions. Rose, seer of light, not knowing what to do without some sort of righteous cosmic purpose. Jade and rose just generally being fucked up adults. Everybody just generally being fucked up adults.

Unchecked yapping under the cut

18 YR OLD ROSE GETTING MAD AT JADE ABT HER MOTHER HELLO I WANT TO SEE THAT?

After Rose’s whole “ramble” I cant stop thinking abt Jade saying how rose agreed to having Yiffy because “she wanted to see what would happen.”

I also refuse to accept that rose is right abt any of her predictions I’m sitting at the bottom of the Nile River in Egypt ok.

I mean! She doesn’t know that Dave is alive! So if she’s wrong abt that she could be wrong abt other things. Fucking Dave I’m so mad at him this ain’t abt him

I’m so excited to see rose and kanaya talk again, I cannot wait. For many reasons. Kanaya Maryam when she’s angry, “flighty broads and they’re snarky horseshit,” this time with soap opera ass betrayals in the middle of a war!

I want to know what Kanaya would say abt rose’s beliefs on their fate. I wonder what SOLLUX, mage of doom would think. Ok that’s off topic. No but rlly, I hope with my whole heart rose says something to Kanaya, Rose my beloved u r being so STUPID rn. None of them are okay.

And I wonder if rose can see the parallels between her thought process, “I’m going to die and my daughter’s heart is going to be broken but nothing can be done fuck this stupid baka life,” and that of her mothers.

Like ok remember when kanaya was talking abt roses mom, “Evasive. Pushy. Lacking In Proper Coping Mechanisms. Carrying An Air Of Unspeakable Sadness.”

I don’t know enough yet to rlly say anything on the matter but when rose was narrating her thoughts abt her imminent doom and how it would affect Vrissy my brain made a connection, IDK

I have to stop here bc these bitches r driving me insane ☝️ I spend way too much time picking apart Homestuck BC.

Maybe I’ll talk abt karkat living up to the vantas legacy next and the dolorosa and signless parallels between kanaya and karkat rn I’m sick

[cat-tastrophee]

I am now Six’s lawyer

when people act as if six is some kind of monster it actually drives me crazy i see people saying the wildest shit "six should die she's an awful person" six is a literal child she is 9 years old in a normal society her actions are "inexcusable" but six doesn’t live in a normal society. There are people after her at all times, she is not a monster, she is a victim.

In the Sounds of Nightmares, the ferryman mentions how not many children survive to adulthood. Six is not a monster, she simply DOESNT WANT TO DIE. and if the only way to survive is to do the things she'd done she would do it, that doesn't mean she's a heartless monster that enjoys hurting other people she's a kid.

im sick of the argument that she "never cared about mono" she very much DID care about mono she saved his ass so many times!!! when six is taken to the signal tower, when she's turned into this distorted monster she's in pain, she's hurting. the only thing that brings her any comfort is her music box which we know she's RLLY defensive of she pushes the music box towards mono, she offers to share it

she cares about mono.

[EDIT: IM ADDING PARTS TO THIS SECTION FROM A RLLY GOOD TAKE BY purplemninja PLS GO CHECK OUT HER THING ABOUT WHY SIX DROPPED MONO, SHE EXPLAINS IT BETTER THAN I EVER COULD] mono destroyed the only thing that gave her comfort, Mono caused her SO MUCH physical and emotional distress by destroying the music box. "but- but he was just trying to help!" YEAH. i know!!!! but that isn't how six saw it. i could go on abt this for hours i will defend six until the day i DIE!!!

In the first game, when she eats RK, a lot of people say stuff like

"she could've just eaten the food he offered her"

let's talk abt her hunger my theory (emphasis on theory) is, at least when the thin man took six and pulled her shadow self from her (or created it), it left something empty in her, that void was replaced with hunger (you could argue it has to do with being on the maw, however Six’s hunger began BEFORE she boarded the maw. (i encourage you to watch Indie Xplorer’s “An analysis on the Nowhere” about Maslow’s hierarchy of needs))

we KNOW that hunger is insatiable while it obviously doesn't make cannibalism okay, no, she literally couldn't have just "taken the food he offered her", not to mention six probably didn't even know the nomes were human

she needed something ALIVE.

people like to take six's character and just treat it like it's black and white

little nightmares as a whole, will NEVER be black and white

she is a child.

there's so much more to it than right and wrong

and that's like why i love it so much.

[callmedylan]

Idea I had for a Dungeon Meshi swap AU

(Farcille and Chilaios fans why are we yet to make a swap AU where Laios x Chilchuck and Falin x Marcille swap.)

(P.S I only recently got into dungeon meshi like a month ago + I’m going off the anime and a bit of character facts from the manga so beware I might get some stuff wrong 💔)

Recently I’ve been cooking up (pun intended) this idea for a swap AU, ofc I love when ppl swap Falin and laios’s places but I wish they’d swap more characters and their stories, so it got me thinking about different possibilities.

what if Chilchuck and Laios were the ones that met in Magic school and become good friends? (for the sake of the AU let’s just say half foots live a bit longer so they age more similarly to humans). Chilchuck learned magic cause he didn’t want to be seen as weak or greedy for his race, which led him to getting miraculously accepted into a prestigious College for magic (which leads him to later learn Dark magic). It’s not his fault he befriended the “weirdo” human boy from said school and now has to save him (he’s worried sick he’s just emotionally constipated as hell).

Along with all this, after being saved from that spirit as a child, Laios realizes he has a love for monsters and what not; which later leads to his love for magic. When hes able to work with his little sister in their group as a Cleric, he was super excited to travel with friends and see all the monsters they come across, it’s too bad he ends up getting munched on by the red dragon.

Meanwhile Marcille is a half Elf for hire who was never able to master magic; And since elf’s aren’t known for their physical strength, she learned to disarm and detect traps. Ofc she probably had trouble with business because of this, but Falin and Laios found her situation super intriguing and hired her almost instantly.

Finally theres Falin, maybe after saving laios from that spirit as a child she realized she enjoyed combat and instead of going on to do magic she instead took a similar path as Canon laios and left home around 12 and later became the leader of their group. Of course while shes much more “mature” than Laios and is better at picking up social cues, she still has that weird fascination with eating monsters; she’s just way less extreme about it (guess it runs in the family).

Senshi could probably stay the same, but I could see him and namari swapping places (still deciding)

Some other roles that would be swapped (there’s more but I’m too lazy to list all of them):

Shuro <—> Maizuru

Kabru <—> Rin

Izutsumi <—> Kuro

dandan <—> Mickbell

(Note I’ll most likely make Farcille and Chilaios canon in this AU)

In this AU Marcille and Falin would actually get to develop their relationship some more and I think it’d be rlly fun for them to have this kinda awkward little Romance, like “hey ik your brother (and our friend) is getting digested rn but you’re rlly cute…”

Meanwhile Chilchuck is annoyed cause his best friend could possibly not be saved and die if they don’t hurry up and stop worrying about eating monsters and forming relationships (as he totally pushes down his feelings for Laios).

I really need to draw something for this AU, I think it’d be rlly fun.

Anyways hope y’all enjoyed my stupid little idea ramble.

[skullcfusher]

Ok guys I tried 2 hold back but too bad I'm posting headcanons🙌

I am going to tell u about Kate and Toby cause I love them ok. They are soooo sibling guys plz they play fight like hell and argue like siblings and they do shit for each other like siblings ok I DON'T MAKE THE RULES (I did actually.)

So with the small stupid comic I posted yesterday if u can even call it that, I think Tim owns this truck right and it's a beat up 2 seater ok and Tim drives and Brian is the passenger princess and then Toby and Kate are the two freaks who have to sit in the actual truck bed and they are actually so funny back there. I think Toby is actually a smart guy he just doesn't show it well okay because look at him, and Kate didn't even finish middle school cause she was RLLY young when slender got to her and so she's just actually not the sharpest tool in the shed okay she's a creature and I like to think Toby teaches her stuff so like imagine they are in the truck bed ok "Kate.. Kate.. Kate dude.." "Toby shh.. shut tf up" "no Kate dude look.. look at that caterpillar it's really cool it's actual-" "I don't care about that Toby shut up" and he's like "Ohhh okay so god forbid I try to teach you smth." And she's like "Shut up before I push you out of the truck" and he's like "Omfg fine good maybe I'll die this time and you'll be stuck doing a mission with Tim and Brian ALONE you freak" and they just continue to bicker. Tim and Brian don't really like Kate they think she's a monster and don't like her cause in my mind she's the person who tormented them and brought them to Slender's doorstep basically and so they just rlly don't like her LMFAO and I don't blame them either but Kate doesn't really talk to people until Mr. Tobias comes around ok like she lives in those dirty ass mines and hasn't changed her clothes like ever ok so Toby shows up and is like damn bitch you live like this!?? And he immediately starts giving her stuff like clothes he can't fit anymore, maybe a mattress and lots of food and just random shit to do, he convinces her to come around to the proxy cabin more and more and smth I thought would be funny is if Tim and Brian come home from whatever and they just see Kate munchin on a sandwich like it's the best shit she's ever had in her life (it probably is) and Toby is just chillin with her and Tim and Brian are like "what the fuck get out?? Why is she here??" And Toby is like "Dude relaaaax she's not even doing anything" and Kate gives ZERO fucks LMFAO SHE'S LOVING THAT SANDWICH SOO MUCH SHE DOESN'T CARE WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND HER LMFAO. Following proxy shenanigans I like to think Kate and Toby wrestle a lot, you can't put a boy who can't feel pain and a really strong girl next to each other and be best friends and them not fuckin duke it out ok I like to think Nina visits the cabin one day and she opens the door and sees Toby fly over the couch and watch Kate jump after him and they are Rollin around on the ground fighting and Nina is like freaking out "OH MY GOD R U GUYS OK IS THIS THE VIOLENT SLENDER SICKNESS Y'ALL TALK AB" and they stop and look at her like ??? Huh CAUSE TO THEM THEY ARE JUST PLAYIN (I don't blame Nina either like Toby's bleeding from his nose and Kate has a busted lip LMFAOA and they've got like scratches all over)

Ok so I wanna touch on angst cause it's not head cannons unless we're kinda sad actually so like Slender def punishes his proxies ok like when they do smth wrong like fuckin up a mission or like commiting friendly fire on another proxy, so when Kate gets punished I like to think Toby will sit with her and hold onto her while she's freaking out cause it's not just like ohh she's kinda sick no like her fingernails tore off from her tearing at the ground she's screaming until her vocal cords can't make anymore noise she's losing it and Toby sits with her like if she just needs smth to lean on, if she needs something to grab or even something to hurt he's holding onto her like she's gonna die like he already lost one sister ok he's not losing this one too LMFAO and then after it passes I like to think he bandages up her hands, similar to how Toby's mom used to bandage his hands after he chewed his skin off yk?? Ok that's all for this post perhaps goodnight fellas

[chuchuminn]

just realized its been really really long since i posted (so sorry for being rlly lazy some stuff happened)

new content!!!!!

what if aruji sama was a DEMON??

smth ive been thinking abt!

im gonna come up with smth like whtever

name = ELENORA STEINE (nora, but none are her real name *its actually ____*

age = VERY OLD.

height = might be crazy... 6'2

facts abt nora:

- very bad memory (no she wont remember where her fork from dining went after going to the bathroom but its ok bc shes a grandma /j)

- came from germany (has a slight german accent wowzers)

- doesnt rlly like sweet but likes sweet if theyre not too sweet...??

- though rlly follows the main story of living in the modern world she just moved in recently 😔

- physically, magically, and mentally capable of murdering someone (any weapon works they should just be dead)

- if shes angry at you kill her or youre the one killed!!! waa waa waa. waa waa waa waa.

buh buh backstory!!! before butlers stuff

-----------

Back when DEMONS, HUMANS, and ANGELS still thrived..

"Is there really such a thing as a war anyway? That would never happen."

Nora says, looking at her two best friends, Kium (ANGEL) and Leon (HUMAN).

"Maybe! Theres a chance, y'know?"

Leon says in a cheerful tone, as Kium speaks up.

"I guess there's a chance as well."

"Anyway, aren't you hungry? We've been sitting in this tavern for a while."

All three nod and go get some food.

---------------

BANG!

Rings the sound of crashes and falling debris, scattering on what was once called the Human territory. Nora, Kium, and Leon were all called back to their own races. One thing was sure. It was war. Noone knew why but the lords of all three races. The three friends were all worried for each other.

They were all on the battlefield as well.

CLANG! CLANG!

The sound of swords clashing rang in Nora's ears. Whooshing of magic from demonic mages and angelic powers fly around.

"Oh, curses.. Why do I have to be doing this..- Leon..?!"

Nora sees Leon, collapsed on the ground. He's.. dead. Someone killed him.

"....Isn't this normal, though? Everyone would die someday."

*Kium says, facing Nora. He has tears running down his face, and he points a spear at you.*

"I have to do this, Nora. I'm so sorry.."

*He tried plunging his spear in Nora's body, but she managed to stop him in time, holding the blade. It couldn't be stopped anyway. Bound to be. She threw the double edged spear at Kium, killing him.*

"It's normal.. Right? Normal. Totally normal.."

*Nora fell down om her knees, and sobbed for a while. She returned back after war was over, and spent life until the modern world.*

--------------

butlers stuff abt NORA time!! (the story was rushed i am sorry)

Berrien:

☆ would love to learn her favorite snacks for tea time!!

☆ when shes sick (its possible ok.) he gives her Tea. (tea tea tea tea im like tea tea ooh just like tea tea ooh)

Lono

☆ he will make every single food she wants no matter the time because when shes rlly hungry she walks around to eat something that is probably edible for demons but not for humans

☆ knows all her favorite foods (hmm, let me guess.. nora's fav food is... Meat)

Bastien

☆ woodcarves her favorite things for her (maybe not a whole house but yeah) mistakenly sleeps in her room if he ever changes her bed (beds, right?)

☆ she teaches him sometimes for fighting stuff but again shes old. her bones are becoming nonexistent. every step you hear some cracking (/j)

Haures

☆ tries his very very best to cook for her (spoiler: it lit the kitchen on fire)

☆ decorated the garden with a lot of stuff because nora said she likes them at a really random time (eg: haures, i like ___.)

Fennesz

☆ reads books with nora then nora starts telling him about what happened during the old times when demons and angels had coexisted

☆ sometimes lifts weights with her because she got a bit bored of standing around (wants her muscles a lot)

Boschi

☆ nora asked him to put a giant pating in her room and it went on the ceiling but nora is happy because its still there (its kinda scary)

☆ flower arranging with boschi time every weekend even though nora gets headaches from them

Ammon

☆ when nora saw THAT scene (spoiler warning: the whip thing) she felt pretty bad for him and wanted to explode his mom

☆ constantly reminds nora not to touch the roses even though it won't hurt that much because he still doesn't want to see her hurt

Lucas

☆ scolds her because she doesn't yap when shes bored but actually runs around and ends up getting hurt

☆ wine lovers (theyre drunkards but nora has more tolerance than lucas because she had drinking competitions before)

Lamli

☆ one time nora ate a red mushroom because of hunger and became as silly as lamli

☆ lamli likes playing with frogs but nora would like to dissect them because its interesting

Nac

☆ nora doesnt understand nac and doesnt know why (his way of words make her brain become water)

☆ scolds her a lot for drinking lots of alcohol because he normally finds her throwing up

Miyaji

☆ doctor also, so... also scolds her with lucas for getting hurt a lot (only thing they can agree on)

☆ nora ate his cooking once after drinking the day before and started vomiting a lot (new rule: never let nora eat spicy after drinking)

Lato

☆ braids her hair but it kinda became a big mess but its fine because nora fell asleep

☆ other than miyaji and flure nora is the only one he likes + nora isnt very scared of him just thinks hes silly

Flure

☆ designed a lot of noras clothes because she really doesnt have that many

☆ nora tried sewing clothes with him once and it turned out pretty good but she stabbed herself a ton

Yuuhan

☆ sparred with her once, stopped because she had a stomach ache in the middle (he will try again)

Hanamaru

☆ talks abt his kids a lot to her and she listens while drinking green tea

Teddy

☆ kinda stalks her and has all her information in his notebook

conclusion....

sorry abt less content for villa butlers bc im not rlly familiar with them 😗

planning on making a new au sooner or later when i have time

thankz so much for reading all this pooks

[mikeyelistsukasa]

Hello, I hope you are feeling well :)

Is it all right If I request a HanaKou oneshot? Basically the prompt is that both Hanako and Kou are fighting an apparition, It’s about to deal a devastating blow to Kou before Hanako quickly jumps in front of him and ends up getting hurt instead. Kou ends up panicking a lot in spite of the fact that Hanako is a ghost and is technically well, already dead.

I hope you have a good day ^^

Your wish is my command lol !~

(My bad i was rlly sick and lots of things going on in life)

Id die for you!

Hanako and Kou waved their goodbye’s to Yashiro as Kou told her that he wants to stay a bit longer at school to check if the school is safe from any other bad apparations.

“I bet on a box of doughnuts that you said that only to stay longer with meeee~” Hanako replied wiggling his eyebrows while grinning

“Oh shut up” Kou was clearly flustered. What’s worse is Hanako wasn’t fully wrong

They entered the school.checked for anything that felt unusual and then they went to the bathroom and decided to play some cards with the mokke since Kou decided one or two rounds wouldn’t hurt before he would go home. Kou must admit it actually felt creepy but also peaceful to stay late at school while noone is here except him and Hanako.

Suddenly the whole school started to shake as the cards flew down. kou immediately grabbed his weapon as Hanako followed him.

The shaking felt like it was from outside so they quickly went out and there They saw a big…no HUGE skeleton.

“W-wha i-is that a?…”

“Gashadokuro” Hanako interrupted as he got into a position to fight with Kou

“HOW AM I EVEN GONNA REACH HIM I CANT FLY LIKE YOU”

Hanako shrugged with his shoulders “You’ll figure out something eventually”

“Wow thx how supportive…” Kou said under his breath as Hanako flew off to attack the skeleton

Hanako’s attacks distracted the spirit as Kou noticed he can climb up the skeleton’s arm and thats exactly what he did. He quickly climbed up while trying to keep his balance. He eventually reached till the head as he with all force plugged his weapon inside the spirit’s eye making the skeleton be in huge pain as he shook Kou off his shoulder making Kou fall to the ground. “KOU!” “I-im alright. Im alright” Kou said finally opening his eyes as he saw the skeleton raise a fist and about to land on Kou. Kou quickly closed his eyes ready to take the damage as he suddenly felt himself getting pushed away and a loud thud be heard. He opened his eyes as he saw Hanako’s arm under the spirit’s fist

“H-HANAKO!” Kou quickly stood up as electricuted the spirits wrist making the skeleton back away.

“H-hanako??? Hanako say something!!” Kou shook Hanako aggressively very worried about him

“G-geez im alright stop shaking me…” Hanako said while coughing a little and shaking off the dust

“Why did you do that?! I could’ve taken the hit.”

Hanako frowned at that. “That hit could’ve been the DEATH of you Kou. I can’t have that. Im already dead so it doesn’t matter”

“But-“

“NO BUT’S…you Don’t have to play the hero in-front of me. I wouldn’t forgive myself if something happened to y-“

Hanako was interrupted as Kou suddenly hugged him taking him off guard

“You’re right…im not immortal like you. I just wanted to proof that im also strong and don’t have to be treated like a little toddler…”

Hanako gently hugged Kou back

“I understand”

“I owe you one”

They suddenly had to break away their hug as the spirit landed another attack and they both quickly dodged

“Now let’s finish off this ugly beast”

Kou nodded in agreement as they both went to finish the spirit off.

After about 20 minutes they found the weak spot of gashadokuro making them finish off the spirit with ease

“We did it!” Kou said happily as they both gave eachother a high five. Seeing Kou so happy after defeating a spirit made Hanako’s heart always flutter for some reason.

“Sooooooo about that thing where you said you owe me one~”

“Hm? Yeah i said that. Any idea already?”

Hanako wiggled his eyebrows with a smirk as Kou frowned and pushed him playfully

“Drop it with that look. Alright alright I’ll bake you doughnuts tomorrow”

“Yaaaaaaaay~” as Hanako hugged him from behind tightly making Kou end up blushing a little as always

Thank you for your request please visit again! <3

[nerd-at-sea5]

reading comics + keeping track of all the kajemac moments that i like (prob not all of them just ones i’ve noticed and think are cute)

-mac goes from laying on her handlebars to super alert the moment kj’s voice comes from the walkie

-mac is the first one to listen to kj when she brings up the ‘war of the worlds’

-kj running after the guys w her hockey sick out and mac yelling ‘kaje, wait!’

-mac punching the guys when they hit kj (and tiff)

-kj and mac arguing over candy during the ‘end of the world’ (ablution)

-kj being the first to vote to go w mac to her house

-kj teasing mac for being a girl scout

-kj and mac agreeing to not put erin (who’s bleeding out) on the handlebars of a bike

-kj and mac arguing over gay stuff, time travel, and discussing kj’s bat mitzvah all in 1 page

-mac ready to leave everyone else to find kj + jumping up the instant she finds even the slightest lead to kj

-‘all that matters is we’re together’ M A C

-the whole ‘saving mac from drowning’ thing

-‘your an asshole’ *proceeds to jump into each others arms*

-the entire mac thinking kj is rlly hurt but in reality she’s just got her period thing

-more of mac being concerned for kj and kj’s like ‘babe i’m just on my period, chill.’

-THE UNTRANSLATABLE

‘it showed me crap that couldn’t possibly-‘ KJ NOT THINKING MAC WOULD LIKE HER BACK

‘i’m gonna kiss mac?’ IN FUCKING BOLD

-mac being mad at kj for running off

-kj judging mac for her taste in comics

-kj coming out to mac, mac not realizing it for a second, and then ‘the fuck did you just say?’

-mac still being crazy worried at kj when the dude hits her with the red stick thing

-kj reciting when she first met mac and mac crying

-‘we’re gonna make sure mac lives rove a hundred’

-just kj telling mac abt her vision

-the entire doctors office thing

-every single times mac calls kj ‘kaje’

-THEN I GUESS WE DO.

-mac thinks she’s abt to die and she’s saying kj’s name

-‘i kissed a girl.’ ‘can you get me back to my girlfriend or not’

-‘because i know you taste like cigarettes and ultra brite toothpaste’

-‘i hate you.’

-‘i didn’t even get to say goodbye’

-the whole bat mitzvah scene.

-have you seen kj tonight?

-‘trust me she’s said way worse’

-they had accidental matching costumes

-‘why’ ‘i have no idea’

-NO PUNCH BACKS

[lai342]

Ganyu

its been FOREVER since i posted anything on here so im doing a ganyu hc <3

-4/10 volume, 8/10 pitch, and 6/10 wetness

-usually always stifles when shes working or doing something important

-always sneezes 2 times (bc i said so <33)

-not allergic to much but maybe like dogs or dust

-HATES sneezing in public (hates being watched sneezing)

-people with a job like ganyus have to have the best immune system ever

-when shes sick she rests all day and does her best to avoid ppl

-takes days off work until shes sure nobody can get sick bc of her

-always blesses people after they sneeze and always excuses herself, even if theyre/shes like about to die

-shes not a very messy sneezer, but she always covers no matter what

-her face would turn like tomato red if she was rlly sick

thats it for ganyu ill try to post more soon <33333

[chryzuree]

fore the modenr au chrysijacks in particularly! what are some misc facts about chrysi and jacks in hs! what were they like..skipped classes a lot? what kind of things were they into.. any fun little memories they think about? would either of them try to get the other to dance in the cold rain with them at night? who gets sick after..

I WAS THINKING ABT THEIR HIGH SCHOOL LIFE VV HARD TODAY, so this is perfect!!

chrysi was the horror friend in hs, obvi… but yk what?? jacks also had a pretty good idea of horror movies too!!! he and chrysi would have horror movie nights where they would swap who chose the film! jacks’s nights tended to have more romantic aspects to the horror, versus chrysi being like “i have got the movie for you!!!!!” and she puts on cronenberg or smth... jacks wants to die.

jacks was a theatre kid first & foremost, but he was also in track!!! mostly because chrysi did pole vault & they would go to meets together. they spent a lot of the time jst laying on the field or in the bleachers talking, watching more horror movies (david lynch this time!! jacks still doesn’t get it!!), or playing stupid parlor games w the rest of the team that almost causes a fistfight.

speaking of theatre kid jacks, chrysi would sometimes pick him up after rehearsal and then they’d go drive up to a lookout to stargaze 🫶🏻 she was DROPPING HINTS the WHOLE TIME.

okay, not quite high school age, but one summer, chrysi leaves taller than jacks. comes back to school and fuck OFF, he’s TALLER THAN HER NOW. she never catches up 💔💔💔

chrysi was very good at going to all of her classes, unless she doesn’t want to 🖤 then she’ll sneak out and go somewhere. jacks tends to rely on her taking him to and from school, so if chrysi’s skipping class, he has to skip class too. they go get smoothies a lot. also jacks gets grounded. still—his parents love chrysi.

jacks also skips all of his classes to hang out with chrysi. all of her teachers know him as chrysi’s little pet & they all endure him.. they gave up trying to separate the two of them. it’s easier to jst assign jacks little classroom chores to keep him from annoying the rest of the class.

chrysi and jacks absolutely share NO classes in their junior year (since chrysi was in a lot of ap courses and jacks was borderline failing high school). this became a real annoyance for the attendance office, since jacks would be sitting in chrysi’s ap lit class instead of his remedial math course..

on that topic, he gets rlly rlly into all the ap english class discussions. has he read the book?? no. he doesn’t even go here. but has he heard all of chrysi’s rants and internalized them?? yes, and he has a fighting chance in the debate.

chrysi was vv into horror (still is), reading, and 80s coming of age films <33 jacks was into chrysi, but didn’t know it 🤗 but also he was dabbling in fashion design (in the modern au, i’m tempted to make him end up being a high end fashion designer.. workshopping this, but the chrysijacks reunion is vv funny in this scenario) and he was obvi into theatre!

chrysi and jacks both think rlly fondly back on those evenings they would spend in the trunk of her car, eating takeout or jst chatting or watching the stars… jst the most mundane things that they felt the most comfortable doing… also, they like remembering going to malls and making fun of things. the mundaneness is so missed after they had their friend breakup (and… actual breakup?? sorta?? it was that weird in between stage of friends to bf/gf.. sad.)

CHRYSI IS DANCING OUT IN THE RAIN!! jacks has this gutter that gets blocked all the time, so he has a huge puddle in front of his house whenever it rains and chrysi would always play in it. he ends up coming out to dance with her too <333 it always ends in chrysi getting sick, bc she’s so frail sobsob. oh well!!! more excuses for jacks to go over and nurse her back to health!! normal friendship thing :)

[penguin--person]

🎨, 💌, 💎, 🚦 oooo woe bunch of emoji questions at u because im the curiosuer

i kept my prommy that id forget to answer any asks 🫡

🎨 If someone were to make fanart of your work, what fic or scene would you hope to see? i would die no matter what 🙏my friend once drew fanart of my fic 'just for today' and awoughhhh its on my mind FOREVER!!!! but umm um . divergence, maybe? i think that could be cool:)!! 'the world is smiling on me' would be awesome too i think, its an rw fic from the pov of a batfly that gets eaten by hunter long legs. i think it could get sick and twisted. same with 'perfect dish' i think someone should draw hunter eating a slugpup or smth idk i never read my fics

💌 Is there a favorite trope you like to write? its not rlly a trope but i enjoy writing gore !! i like writing pain and angst and agony etc... i like exploring canon divergence, but i dont write fics for that that often

💎 Do you often write about a relationship or focus on an individual? what is an individual made of if not their relationships with others..!!! i cant rlly answer this.. i rlly enjoy writing character studies where nothing at all happens. the character just angsts about. but, usually theyre angsting about their relationships with other people, yknow? like, in 101 epitaphs, sanyas the primary focus of the fic, but so is her relationship with yura. in an unpublished writing where i explore my oc nastyas sick and twisted mind, shes just sitting in her bed thinking about stuff, but the main focus is her relationship - or, her view of - another character. eughhh im yapping !!!! but like, yeah . idk . i couldnt seperate the two if you held a gun to my head

🚦What sort of endings do you prefer to write: ambiguous, bad, happily ever after, etc.? ambigous 🙏🙏🙏i Hate deciding things i Hate having to be the one to give the story an ending ... an ambigous ending isnt 'an easy way out', like, no way, but for me its easier, i guess? like, at the end of 'i wish i never met you' the ending is clear, but its not clear whether nastyas gonna come back or not ! at the end of 101 epitaphs, its clear that nothing more is gonna come out of yuras death, but, whats sanya gonna do? mope about? idkkk . i dont know my writing . ive never written a word in my life this is my first time using my keyboard hi hello good morning

[marylily-my-beloved]

!!SPOILERS!! Girl in Pieces

Pg 31-46 

TW: SELF HARM MENTION, SELF HARM SCARS, A LOT OF TALK ABOUT SELF HARM AND SUICIDE, RAPE? SEX TRAFFICKING? IDK

‘It’s all the same thing: self-harm.’ Is it though? It’s all so different and does things so differently but it’s the same end goal. 

‘You can never not be a creepy freak, because your whole body is now a scarred and charred battlefield and nobody likes that on a girl, nobody will love that, and so all of us, every one, is screwed, inside and out. Wash, rinse, fucking repeat.’                               Because you can never not be a weirdo if someone sees it, you can never be the same with them, they just act so different. Why do they act to different? I don’t really know, because everyone who has experienced the same doesn’t change their perspective on you, at least they understand. 

Following the rules is a very hard thing to do, surprising she can do it

Evan and Dump. They brought her backpack, they said they were sorry. ‘Were they sorry that they couldn’t not take all three of us to live with Fucking Frank? I was sick… Were they sorry I wouldn’t do what Fucking Frank asked? (What he wanted all the girls in Seed House to do, if they wanted to stay.) Were they sorry they didn’t let me die in the attic of Seed House?’ You know the more I hear about Fucking Frank the more I think he’s a fucking sex trafficker… Evan and Dump don’t seem too bad? They seem to have helped her a lot so I think they’re ok 

Money, there’s money, they have money, but does Louisa? Does Charlotte? They need money for everything here obviously.

‘Today I get my bandages off’ She’s gets her bandages off I hope it all goes well for her, I hope it doesn’t trigger her (or me lol) 

She draws Blue!!! She’s drawing!!! Then she Xed her out. Ok.

My pen writes ‘OUT. GET IT OUT. CUT IT ALL OUT.’ That’s what she thinks when she shs and honestly it’s sad because it makes so much sense 

Blue took her fucking paper. Just why? Jfc. ‘“You know, Doctor, it’s very unfair.” “What’s unfair?” Casper regards Blue… “She never has to say anything. We all have to talk, spill our fucking guts out, and she doesn’t have to say shit. Maybe we’re like a little comedy show for her”’ Oh fucking hell Blue, of course that’s what goes through her mind, of fucking course I mean why do so many people think like that? It’s not always fucking like that. But it makes sense she assumes the worst of people. 

I mean I get why Blue would tell everybody, but why tell her to tell everybody her life story? Like man. 

‘If you were a girl, and you were at Seed House, and you wanted to stay at Seed House, there was a room downstairs with only mattresses. Frank put girls in the room. Men came to the house and paid Frank, then went into the room.’ I FUCKING KNEW IT, OF COURSE FUCKING FRANK. I always thought that it was Fucking Frank because she really fucking hated him but no. …

Ellis is missing, her father is dead, her mother is somewhere? Not dead that’s for sure. 

She’s going to attack Blue, but she can’t because if she does one more thing she can’t stay… well good for Blue 

‘Charlotte, Evan said, his eyes shiny, drunk, smears of my blood on his cheek, that night in the attic. What a beautiful name. He kissed my head, over and over. Please don’t leave us, Charlotte’ But in the end she kind of did, will she ever see them again? Will they ever see her? I think they just know she’s alive. 

Golden teeth really, damn these people are fucking rich. This nurse Vinnie must be rlly fucking rich. 

He’s clipping the stitches and he took off the bandages for her. Holy shit. How will she feel? 

‘Underneath these new scars, I can see the old ones. My scars are like a dam or something.’ This is such a good interesting metaphor because I’ve never thought of it like that, but if you think it really is like that. 

‘The best part is after.’ It really is, when you just sit down, and think about what you did, clean it up, bandage it and it’s just there forever, you know it’ll be there forever lol

‘More scars = more shame = more pain’ may i add something. More pain = less after. Because the more you do it the more it becomes this was the before doing it and doing it, there’s no after cause you just do it again so frequently. 

PINK UNDERWEAR 🎀🎀 

‘“Nurse. Ava. Bought. Me. This. Underwear.”’ SHE SPOKE OMGG SHE SPOKE!!!! AHHHH SHE SPOKE YESSS!!! 

She didn’t say thank u :/ 

Wrapped up in a bedsheet??? 

‘When the blood comes, everything is warmer, and calmer.’ It really is, until it dries up and it’s all sticky (eww) 

Ellis!!! ELLIS!!! 

Her dad died ages ago, and her mother is a ghost to her :/ OMGGG

Little side note: this barely triggered me lol 

[fruiteggsaladit]

The fandom needs more aus so Im adding one I just made

Recently bereaved of her childhood and best friend Yusuke, Yukimura Keiko opens the window one evening to admire the sunset. She's surprised to see a flock of furious, angelic birds attacking a humanoid figure-

Who soars upwards with a heave of jagged, dark wings.

When that is thwarted, it somehow ends up closer to Keiko's neighbourhood instead as another attempt to escape. Bewildered, Keiko waves and yells without thinking for it to come here, come inside here!

The figure hesitates for only a moment, and then dashes into the open window, crashing somehow into every little part of what is now formerly Keiko's bedroom.

Keiko doesn't know it yet, but the young demon from hell's name is Yukina, and it's looking for it's brother - a half-demon.

It's being pursued by Heaven in the hope to collect a valuable hostage; indeed, the ward of a demon lord (Rui) would have merit when they seek demonic allies against the demon king to kill him. An alleged Eater of Seraphim would be a good ally indeed.

Additional notes because I made them tags @ first and then they got so long I felt bad for whoever might read them:

Fire and shadow powers for yukina bc im a little bored w the ice magic and wanna experiment w that too

Keiko becoming a witch to help protect Yukina better by making a contract w it would also be a very cute and major part of the premise

Yukina knowing abt witches in theory and having only met a few of them would also be cause for shenanigans - like knowing what a pharmacist is and does but having little idea abt what it entails aside from "wonderful person who is very patient while I'm fumbling to get my ID out for them so they may give me my prescription and/or inform me of how much that'll cost"

"Can you be a pharmacist?" "Sure, how hard can that be?" Very hard but very funny to watch from a distance and after the next big problem is over.

Yukina enrols into Sarayashiki and it wears the boy's uniform and we have an entire episode dedicated to being able to choose your uniform regardless of the gender society is putting on you. Akashi and Iwamoto are ofc the villains here. Keiko rationalises that Yukina's a demon, ofc it wouldnt have the genders humans have; she has no idea Yukina has single-handedly inspired several people to transition and experiment.

Hell and earth differences. Yukina keeps using all the hot water and one time it and Keiko have to try to fix the bathroom, that's how hot Yukina ran the water.

Home sickness! Yukina having an arc of deciding it'll actively look for its brother!

Backstory episode... Yukina actually being chased out of hell and escaping to earth.

Keiko at an early point: You can't tempt me to do bad things to people! Not even if I think they deserve it! I mean it! not even a thumb-tack in their food!! Yukina: Why would you do that, that sounds so mean. Keiko: (rlly wants to have an excuse to do that)

very anime too to have a cute plot at first and then reveal the BIG SADS

“Eater of Seraphim” being Rui who ate Hina's heart as she was dying to gain enough power to fight off other demons or invading angels bc she needs that and Hina told her to

Hina being a seraph bc Im not immune to the Your Wings and Mine webtoon and I wanna cry when I hear her name or see it written out

Kurama is half demon half human. Don't think he was Yoko Kurama in another life here(??), I think in this case this is a case of him being possessed by a demon and dealing w the fact that the demon doesn't seem to realise it will die no matter if Kurama tries to feed it or not. It doesn't know it's a demonic ghost, which is something that shouldn't exist.

very embarrassed when he realises these two idiots are babies in the matters of witchhood and contract-making, which is embarrassing when one of them is literally from hell and the ward of a demon lord whose position is only "lesser" bc she doesn't desire anymore land than what is sufficient to protect her child(ren). ".... I wasted. An entire day. To harass babies." He can never let the them know.

hiei was sent to earth to protect him & he has no idea hes not human. for maximum funsies he's at catholic school & hes nicknamed a "demon". We won't meet him till episode 60 (out of 75 and then a movie)

cant decide if i want botan to b an angel or a witch.... what abt an ojamajo doremi thing where keiko accidentally curses her to become her witch tutor or she becomes a toad. or she does become a toad but its only at night hell yes princess tutu vibes as well

Botan the botany witch please GOD. PLESE: GOD:.

Yeah yeah yeah Botan botany witch playing heaven and hell as a freelance witch and not thinking about how she's contributing to the conflict, "I'm just trying to make buck!" (she's doing just fine and could be a witch on commission working a different job part/full time).

Botan clocking Yukina as a demon and the Rogue Demon Ward Who's Escaped to Earth immediately when it and their classmates are there after school or for a school outing and kidnapping it. Keiko saves it and turns Botan into a toad. Botan becomes the blackmailed mentor figure.

Gasp. Witch exams. Bc Keiko needs to do them to become certified bc its when someone uncertified calls a witch a witch that a witch turns into a toad... it was only bc Keiko has a contract already that Botan was lucky enough to only be turned toad SOMETIMES.

shizuru a witch or a priest... Priest on monday-wednesdays, witch thursdays-sundays yeah thats funny we keep that. It's the 90s anime shenanigans that will leave a viewer feeling "If this was a man and a woman, Botan and Shizuru definitely would look like Duck trying desperately to hide she turns into a duck sometimes and Fakir knowing this and fucking with her at every turn anyways."

No, Shizuru priest but her parents are witches. Kuwa could be a priest but is working on if that's the path he wants.

[evilsnievil]

A couple weeks ago I had a bit of an episode and drank far too much vodka and went into psychosis and started sh-ing and told all my friends I was gonna off myself and eventually my family found me like that and I was just screaming at the top of my lungs and crying for like 2hrs and most of it was about the rapture and asking god to un-forsaken me because I genuinely felt like I was gonna die and religious trauma✨ and sometime after I was out my best friend who lives nearby called the police and biked to my house in the middle of the night and I feel rlly bad about that😐 and my mom had to convince them not to take me to a psych ward apparently and I’m just glad I was asleep for all of that because I hate cops I have trauma

Anyway waking up the next morning was embarrassing asf I had to text the group chat like hey guys just kidding I was heavily intoxicated dw about it ahaha and apparently i finished off the big vodka bottle even tho I clearly remember leaving a good amount in there but that’s beyond me and my parents were mad at me and I was having a killer hangover and it was just not a good time

My best friend and I were texting a lot though like to be there for each other and he was kinda not doing good either. I think what I did kinda messed him up. He would text me in the middle of the night because he had a nightmare or got anxious/scared. I feel bad about causing that.. it was nice to feel needed though. We were both at a vulnerable point and just something about being there for each other through that felt so different and comforting because I’ve never had someone like that before.

I feel guilty that he has to deal with all my bullshit though

I just wanted to write something because I’m having a really bad day today and it’s not because of that stupid girl there’s just something fundamentally wrong with me I think and she brought it all out after I’ve been comfortably burying it all these years and I hate her so much I am not in a place to be fucking feelings things I have things to do and I’m about to graduate and I need to be an adult and she‘s fucking with my brain and I feel so shitty and tired all of the time but I don’t even know what’s real because sometimes I’m happy like nothing ever happened and times like now I feel so terrible for no reason and every second I’m fantasizing about self sabotaging but never doing it because I don’t want to cause trouble so I just sit here looking fucking stupid and ugly and useless I just want this stupid fucking weight off I want to be a good and normal and productive person I’m fucking sick of this I want everything to be normal and okay I’m so tired I’m so so tired