#like if he had just said or done something different would Keith have stayed…….

[heynhay]

in some other realm, you are waiting for me

[nightwriter357]

Smosh Summer Games:Ships 9

Okay so this story is almost done now.. I'm thinking 1 or 2 more parts after this one. I really hope you like it and feel free to let me know what you want for this story before it's done.

xxxxx

part 9 - release all of those sounds that are trapped in you mind. AAAAAAH!

Spencer dragged you and Damien upstairs, you couldn't help but notice the growing buzz among your friends. There was something different in the air-something chaotic but familiar. You exchanged a quick look with Damien, silently agreeing that whatever was about to happen, you were in for it.

"The Newlywed Game," Spencer announced like he'd been waiting to say those words all day. This was the final game of this trip. You tried to keep your face neutral, but the idea of playing this game with Damien in front of everyone made your stomach flip. There's no way this was going to go smoothly.

As Spencer gleefully explained that each ship would do the game together accompanied by him, Olivia and their team captain, the lounge buzzed with energy. You tried to stay calm, but your mind was still racing, thinking about Damien. Now that you knew he liked you—and that you liked him—you felt the secret weighing on you. You hadn't had time to talk about it with him yet, and the teasing glances from Courtney and Shayne weren't helping.

As Noah and Keith were called away, you and Damien found yourselves sitting in the lounge with the others. You glanced at him, wondering if he was thinking about the conversation you almost had before you were interrupted.

"Damien," Shayne started, leaning back in his chair with a smirk. "So, have you guys talked?"

Damien looked at him, confused but amused. "Uh... We talk all the time," he said, and you could see Courtney grinning as if she knew a punchline was coming.

"oh all the time, huh?" Courtney chimed in, her eyebrows waggling. "Would you say multiple times?"

There was a flicker of something behind Damien's eyes, like he was connecting the dots, but not quite. You shot her a playful glare, knowing exactly what she was insinuating. 

Damien let out a small laugh, shaking his head. "Am I missing something here, guys?"

Trevor, who had been silently watching the conversation unfold, suddenly jumped  in. "Oh, Maybe they have a big secret? Like a hidden treasure or a secret love child!"

"Yes, Trevor. They definitely have a secret love child," Arasha said sarcastically, nudging him with her elbow. "Or maybe you're just not paying attention."

You caught Damien's eye, biting your lip to hold back a smile. His confusion was kind of endearing, but the situation was starting to get a bit more complicated than you'd planned. The conversation continued into a lighter topic. Later across the room, Noah and Keith came back quietly laughing about something.

"What's so funny over there?" you asked, curious.

"Munge!" Keith wheezed, causing Shayne to nearly choke on his drink from laughing so hard.

He wiped his mouth, "haha, MUNGE."

"Oh no, not this again," you groaned, catching Tommy's eye. The two of you mouthed, What does that even mean? to each other, completely baffled.

"I'm so confused," Tommy mouthed back.

Noah winked in your direction. "You'll figure it out someday, kids."

Ian joined the conversation, "Kids, kids, settle down," he said mockingly, drawing laughs from the group. "We need some decorum here."

"Right. Decorum," Amanda added with a sly smile. "As if that ever worked."

Chanse rolled his eyes, turning to Tommy. "I swear, I can't take you guys anywhere."

Angela, who had been drumming her fingers on the table energetically, threw him a grin. "We're on a ship, Chanse, nowhere to go even if you tried."

Chanse pursed his lips, "Bitch, I could still throw you overboard."

Angela waved her hands around, "hey HEY, shut up!"

The group's laughter bubbled up again, and as you leaned back in your seat, you realized how much you enjoyed these moments of chaotic calm. It was easy to get lost in the banter, it almost made you forget about the secret you were dying to share with Damien.. almost.

Suddenly, Olivia popped her head back into the lounge. "Trevor and Arasha, you're up!"

Trevor hopped out of his seat like an eager puppy. "Wish me luck, guys!"

"Don't cheat, Arasha!" Ian called out as Arasha got up to leave.

"Cheat? I would never," Arasha replied, her tone dripping with mock innocence as she walked out, leaving everyone laughing behind her.

You were sat there on the couch watching each ship go in for their turn. It didn't seem like the right time to steal Damien away, not until you had your turn. A part of you enjoyed this moment though, seeing him give you that look and actually knowing what it meant. He likes me.

After every other ship had had their turn it was finally time for you and Damien. Olivia called you, Damien and Ian in and you were met by the beautiful view that is Spencer Agnew in his perfectly altered robe.

Spencer dramatically gestured to the small whiteboards set up in front of you and Damien and explained the rules: each of you would write down answers on your whiteboards to a series of questions about the other person. The goal? To see if your answers matched. If they did, you'd earn points, and, of course, make the current score 3-2 to team leg-peggers . "Alright, time to see how well you really know each other. Write your answers down, and we'll see if they match."

You and Damien exchanged a quick look, both of you holding back a grin. You could feel the playful tension in the air, the room buzzing with everyone's eyes on you two.

"First question," Spencer started, his voice taking on the tone of a dramatic game show host, "what was Y/N wearing when you two first hung out?"

You scribbled your answer on the whiteboard-easy, he talked about it recently. Damien would remember for sure.

Damien smiled and paused for a second before confidently writing and flipping the board, "A daisy dress."

You turned your whiteboard around, revealing your answer. Ian clapped his hands together and Spencer exclaimed, "Correct! They know each other quite well folks!"

Olivia chimed in, "Daisies are like, the flower?" She looked off into space, seemingly pondering her own thought.

Ian raised an eyebrow. "Uh... okay, Olivia. Let's move on." He turned to you and Damien with an approving nod. "Great start, though."

You couldn't help but smile, feeling the warmth from Damien's casual confidence.

Spencer didn't waste any time moving forward. "Next question! Where's the wildest place Damien has hooked up?"

You and Damien both paused, your eyes widening slightly as you scribbled your answer on the board. You could already feel the heat rising to your cheeks. You knew what he was going to say.

Damien looked around the room, then back at you, smirking. "On a ship."

The room went silent for a beat before everyone erupted in laughter.

"Wait, you mean like this ship?" Ian asked, looking shocked.

You turned your board around, confirming his answer. "Ship."

Spencer shook his head in disbelief. "Bold choice. So have you ever been on a ship before or does that mean.."

Olivia gasped, her hands flying to her mouth. "Oh my god, like, what if it was right where we're sitting now? Like... in the exact same spot!" She jumped up from her chair and dramatically scanned the floor. "What if he's doing it RIGHT now!"

Damien laughed. "Not this exact spot and obviously not in this exact moment."

Spencer, always in character, banged the hammer on the table. "Alright, alright, let's keep it PG, folks. Moving on!"

Olivia shot him a look, "well you asked the question dude!"

You tried to compose yourself as Spencer introduced the next question. "What's an annoying habit Y/N has?"

Damien was quick this time, writing his answer on the board and flashing you a cheeky grin, you rolled your eyes playfully, knowing exactly what he was going to say. "Holding everything with both hands."

You narrowed your eyes at him, remembering how he'd pointed that out a few days ago. You turned your board around, showing that he was right.

"Cute," Ian commented. "It's not annoying if it's adorable, though."

Olivia tilted her head, thoughtfully stroking her chin. "Does that mean you also use both feet for holding?"

Damien blinked at her. "Liv... what?"

Spencer waved his hand. "Ignore her, she's to far gone."

"Next question!" Spencer moved forward, clearly enjoying this. "What food can Damien not live without?"

You grinned, writing your answer quickly. This one was easy.

"Shellfish," Damien answered with confidence.

You turned your board, and Spencer clapped his hands together. "Correct again! These two are on fire!"

You interacted with the camera, "Guys, did you know Damien is a Shellfish guy?"

Damien smirked and leaned back in his chair. "That's right, shrimp girl."

Everyone burst into laughter remembering the put it in my mouth video you recorded recently, and you shook your head, grinning.

Ian chuckled. "Shrimp girl and shellfish guy are truly rocking the boat"

Spencer was barely keeping it together. "Okay, okay! Let's wrap this up before I lose control of the show. Last question-what's one word Damien would use to describe Y/N?"

You scribbled your answer quickly, knowing exactly what he would say. Damien seemed to have the same thing mind.

"One word?" Damien repeated, glancing at you before confidently saying, "Lover."

The room immediately filled with playful "oooohs" and laughter.

Ian shook his head. "Well I feel like we all knew that one."

Damien just chuckled, turning to you as you revealed your whiteboard with the same word. Of course we matched.

Spencer adressed the camera, "Looks like these lovers just got a perfect score."

He leaned in, his voice soft and teasing, "Told you we know each other well."

Your heart skipped a beat, and you smiled at him. Maybe we really do.

Spencer then glanced at Olivia and Ian. "Alright, let's bring everyone back in!" Olivia nodded and headed out the door, her voice echoing through the hall as she called for the others to join you.

Moments later, the door swung open and the rest of the crew streamed in, laughing and chatting. Anthony led the way, Trevor and Amanda not far behind, while Noah caught up with Keith, both of them holding plates of snacks.

Shayne chuckled from the back of the room, shaking his head. "haha, MUNGE."

Courtney smiled at him and raised her eyebrow, "You know, nobody even said it this time?"

He raised his shoulders, before laughing again "I know but, you know MUNGE"

She shook her head before lauging along.

 "What'd we miss?" Anthony asked, eyes bouncing between you and Damien.

Spencer smirked, twirling his marker, letting everyone take their seats before writing the final score on the whiteboard: "And the winners are... Team leg-peggers!"

The room erupted in cheers, laughter, and playful jabs. Spencer raised his hands for silence, a wide grin on his face. "But wait! This isn’t just a victory for today—this makes you the winning team of the entire Smosh Summer Games: Ships!"

The crowd went wild, high-fives and hugs exchanged, while the Leg-Peggers basked in their well-deserved glory.

Ian stood up, pumping his fist in victory. "That's right, baby! Leg-peggers all the way!"

Anthony clutched his chest dramatically, pretending to collapse onto the couch. "This isn't over, Leg-peggers! The Seamen will rise again!"

The room was filled with laughter as the finality of the game set in. After the joking and banter settled down, everyone drifted toward dinner. The cast crowded around the long table, plates piled high with food. Conversations buzzed in every corner, but your thoughts kept drifting to Damien, who sat beside you.

He caught your gaze several times, a smile tugging at his lips as he leaned in closer. "You know I'm still really curius about that conversation we almost had?"

You nodded, but your heart was pounding. Now's the moment, you thought. You couldn't wait any longer. Not when everything felt so right, and you knew exactly how you felt about him.

You leaned over, your voice just above a whisper, "Hey, can we talk? Alone?"

Damien's expression shifted from curious to serious, sensing the weight behind your words. "absolutely," he said softly, standing up and motioning for you to follow.

You both quietly excused yourselves, slipping out of the noisy dining area and down the stairs. It was quiet down here, you could only heat the sound of the waves gently crashing against the boat. Outside your shared room, you paused, taking a deep breath before turning to face Damien.

His gaze was gentle, full of concern and curiosity but with a slight smile on his face. "So, what's going on?"

You took a deep breath, heart pounding in your chest. "We've had a lot of fun together, right? And I kept telling myself it was just... because we were here, you know? Circumstances, sharing a bed, all that. But... I don't think that's true anymore."

Damien's brow furrowed slightly, but he stayed quiet, waiting for you to continue.

"I thought I could keep pretending it didn't mean anything. But it does. I like you, Damien. Not just because we're here or because we've gotten close, but because it's you. I like the stupid conversations we have. I like sneaking off with you. I like how you make me feel safe and... just everything. I want to tell you all the things we haven't said yet.. I think I'm in love with you."

The words tumbled out all at once, and the moment they did, you felt the weight lift off your chest. You looked up at Damien, your eyes searching his for a response.

Damien blinked, as if trying to process your words. Then, a slow smile spread across his face, and he let out another soft laugh, this one full of disbelief. "Wow. I mean, I didn't think... I—wow."

"Didn't think what?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper now.

He blinked, a soft, surprised laugh escaping his lips. "Wow. I mean... wow. I—God, I didn't think you'd feel the same." He ran a hand through his hair, still smiling in disbelief. "I've been in love with you for so long, and I was terrified to say it. I thought you just saw this as a fling."

He took a step closer, his hands reaching for yours. Your heart swelled with relief  "Really?", even though you already knew, part of you felt suprised.

Damien nodded, his thumbs brushing gently against your knuckles. "Absolutely, how could I not be!" he exclaimed, laughing again. "Wow, we've really done everything backwards! We slept in the same bed before we even kissed. We called each other 'lover' before we even had sex. And we've been doing all this.. feeling all this, without even going on a date?"

You couldn't help but laugh with him. "Yeah, we kind of skipped some steps, huh?"

Damien chuckled softly, his hands sliding to your waist, pulling you closer. "So... do you want to?"

"Want to what?" you asked, your voice a whisper now.

"To go on a date," he murmured, his eyes soft but serious.

You felt your heart race, grinning as the tension eased. "Can you imagine if I said no?"

As you stood close, the air between you felt charged, electric with unspoken words and lingering glances. Damien's gaze flickered from your eyes to your lips, his breath hitching slightly. You could feel the warmth radiating from him, and your heart raced in anticipation.

He moved in, the world around you fading away. Just before your lips brushed, the weight of the moment settled in.

"Is it weird that I'm kind of nervous to kiss you?" you blurted out, breaking the tension but only adding to it.

Damien's lips curled into a playful smile, eyes glinting with mischief. "Yes, you're super weird."

As you both leaned in, the distance evaporated, and your heart raced in time with his. The moment felt suspended in time, as if the world outside didn't exist. His lips brushed against yours, tentative at first, exploring the new uncharted territory of this connection. 

You melted into the kiss, the intensity building as Damien deepened it, his hands cradling your face, thumbs gently stroking your cheeks. It felt like everything clicked into place—his warmth enveloping you, a perfect harmony of desire and tenderness. The kiss was both electric and soft, igniting a fire that spread through you, making everything else fade into the background.

"Whoa, whoa! What do we have here?" Spencer chimed in, leaning against the doorframe, a teasing grin plastered on his face in that ridiculous cropped judge's robe.

Just as you and Damien were fumbling to explain yourselves, Spencer held up a hand with a smirk. "Hey, hey, I'm not one to judge."

You and Damien exchanged awkward glances, both of you clearly caught off guard.

You groaned, feeling your face heat up as you nudged Damien's arm. "This really isn't how we wanted anyone to find out..."

"Oh, this isn't how I found out," Spencer said nonchalantly, leaning against the wall.

Both you and Damien blinked in confusion. "Then... how?"

Spencer's grin widened. "Oh, by the way, when the red light is on, it means the camera is recording."

You froze. Damien's eyes widened.

"Wait, does that mean—?"

Spencer gave a casual shrug, his grin never fading. "Hey no judgement here, even though I know you already took it to Court."

As he started heading up the stairs, you both averted your eyes quickly, avoiding a full view of the "Spencer Ag-nude Show."

"What does he mean "took it to court?"," Damien muttered under his breath.

You let out a small laugh, "I might have told Courtney.." you put your hand on his shoulder, "and Shayne knows, Spencer too. I'm pretty sure Arasha knows as well, maybe Ian. Oh god, tomorrow's gonna be..

Damien's arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you into him. "Tomorrow," he echoed, his voice low, full of warmth.

You leaned in, your lips brushing against his softly, savoring the moment as the world outside faded away again.

[kidge-planet]

KIDGE HEADCANON PART 12!

During the episode 9 season 8, we can find that scene:

Well, I have an headcanon about what happened next, when they got back to the Atlas:

So they came back to the Atlas and got immediately checked by some doctors aboard the ship to make sure that they were ok. Hopefully, everyone was ok (except Allura that had passed out at the end of the mission and was now resting.)

It was just the paladins sitting on the couch in a common area of the atlas but there was no one else around just them. Finally Lance left to go check on Allura because he was very worried about her and Hunk would be going to the kitchen.

So now only Keith and Pidge were in the room: pidge working on her computer and Keith just crossed arms in the couch... He seemed worried:

Pidge: are you ok? You look like you have something in mind.

Keith: I... Actually, yes. I needed to talk to you.

Pidge:ho?... Really? What's up?

Keith: ( blushes a little, not knowing how not sound weird) hummm... I just... Wanted to know... When you passed through the ground, what did you guys saw?.. (that wasn't what he had to tell her.......)

Pidge: mhh.. well... I personally saw a shadow trying to kill me. But it turned out that it was Trigel, the original paladin of my lion. I think it was the same for everyone else.

Keith: ho, I see...

(they stayed silent a moment)

Pidge: is that all you wanted to ask me? I mean, you literally said that you needed to talk to me and just asked a question...

Keith: (take a deap breath) Actually... No, I'm not done. I'm just scared that I'll sound stupid...

Pidge: why would you sound stupid ?

(Keith stands up and comes to sit next to her.)

Keith: you know, back there, I... Tried to, like, save you. I did my best, but I failed... Your hand slipped from mine. And, well, I felt so bad after that. I felt like I had lost all of you... I felt like I lost you.. But you know, for you, it was different, I really tried to save you! I did! And I failed. It all just made me realize how dangerous this all is... It made me realize that we could lose one of us easily... I'm just... So glad that you survived and... I want you to know that I'm sorry that I couldn't save you... I sound stupid, but it really keeps coming in my mind... I'm glad you're here.

(Keith blushed and looked away, feeling vulnerable.)

Pidge: Awww, Keith, that's so sweet!... Thank you, I'm glad you're ok too. Really. And stop thinking about what happened during that mission. It never really came to my mind but I forgot to thank you for trying to save me. But why me?.. Like, all of us were getting pulled in the ground...

Keith: Well, I don't know... My instinct told me to save you... The choise wasn't easy, of course, but I wanted to save you first... Don't tell the others tho... I also figured that if I saved you, we would work together to get the others back, somehow... I mean, I thought that you'd find a solution...

Pidge: I understand...

Keith: But anyways, this whole thing made me realize that we might die young after all... You know, I think I always thought that I was strong enough to defeat Zarcon and everything... But I'm realizing that we are now facing something very dangerous... And if we lose one of us... (If I lose you...)

Pidge: hey, I'm sure Shiro told you this before but, as my father always said: "if you get too worried about what could go wrong, you might miss a chance to do something great!" These words help me as a paladin. I am not the strongest, I'm actually far from being an ideal paladin... I could die any minute! But fuck it! If I think about my death during a mission, you can be sure that the mission IS going to go wrong. Nah, I'm just doing things and adapting myself to the situation. What I mean is that you should live in the moment and not think about the future. SO! STOP THINKING THAT IM GOING TO DIE IN OUR NEXT MISSION OR I'LL KICK YOU BUTT! But thank you for worrying tho, I appreciate that from you, emo boy. ( She gently punch his arm)

Keith: You're right.

Pidge: pfff, I'm always right...

Keith: that's true, that's why I trust you.

(Pidge smiled at him.)

Pidge: just, take opportunitys, alright?..

Keith: opportunitys... Mhhh...

( HE HARDLY WANTS TO KISS HER. But he doesn't take that opportunity. Probably not the right moment, he thinks to himself...)

Pidge: so are you going to stay here?

Keith: yeah, I like it here.

(she leans her head on his shoulder. Keith blushed slightly and after hesitating, he placed his arm behind her.)

Pidge: I like it too.

[alwaysthesitter]

car: for our muses to get intimate inside a car

"If this ruins my seats, Billy, I swear to God - " Steve huffed, as if he hadn't had sex in the back of his BMW more times than he could count. There were two things that made this situation different than those, though. For one, he was always with girls, and therefore always wearing a condom so nothing could get anywhere. For two, this was Billy he was with, which naturally meant he had to be a little bit of a sassy shit. "This leather wasn't cheap, and my job isn't going to pay for new interior."

Being a brat was almost like his form of foreplay with the other, and no matter how badly he wanted Billy in that moment and always, he wasn't going to cave that easily. "Don't know why we couldn't fuck in the Camaro." He mumbled under his breath, scrunching up in the backseat of his own car. Despite his bitching, he was already trying to get undressed, wondering how he had possibly done this so much in high school.

Ah, yes, in high school he didn't care as much about those girls, as cruel as it was to say. Getting fully undressed certainly hadn't been needed back then. Pushing the girl's shirt up so he could snap her bra off and touch her boobies, definitely necessary. But he always stayed mostly clothed, minus the zip of his fly open and his underwear shoved down so that he could have access.

It was different with Billy. They had been a couple for awhile now, and while neither of them had said the L word (not lesbians, no, that was Robin's area of expertise), Steve absolutely felt it. He was just terrified to share that, thus it get thrown in his face like it had with Nancy. He knew he was more to Billy than just a lay, because Billy and him had put a title on it after awhile. But he didn't know if he meant as much to the surfer as he did to Steve.

But due to this difference, Steve wanted to be more intimate. Wanted it to be more than just a quick ejaculate and evacuate. He wanted that skin-on-skin contact with Billy, to be able to see as many inches of his glorious body as he could. So it was only fair if Steve did the same. He had struggled tugging the shirt off his torso, knocking his head a few times on the window as he had shuffled, though finally managed and exposed his hair-covered chest.

His hands clutched at the younger, pulling him down into a searing kiss, showing that his annoying hesitation was all an act - it was clear Steve had wanted it. The lamp glow from the parking lot cast shadows on Billy in such a beautiful light, and he would have completely gotten lost of it if not for - "Let's just hope Keith doesn't come back because he forgot something. I don't need to get fired for fucking in my work parking lot."

@hellwaits

[waugh-bao]

Why did Charlie join the Stones?

A few months ago, one of the journalists who was interviewing Keith asked him about why he thought Charlie had ever gotten mixed up with the Stones in the first place:

"I never did ask him that myself: 'Why the hell did you join us, man?' I presume it was something he heard in the music we were listening to and trying to play. Also, he had that sense of adventure: 'I’m just going to be another jazz player in a big pond. Or I can hang with these crazy guys and see where it goes.'"

Keith never asked Charlie, but he was quite remarkably on point as to what happened.

In recent years, whenever a journalist would press Charlie on that question, he was pretty evasive. It was always some version of 'I was in three other bands at the time anyway' and 'it was all good luck.'

But in the early '80s, a music journalist who was doing an interview with Charlie found, like many people after that same task, he wasn't exactly much of a talker. So when he got to Stones history in the piece, the writer mixed Charlie's contemporary answers with ones from magazines and newspaper pieces done in the early to mid '60s.

This is how he described his initial encounters with them, and tentatively joining:

"[After leaving Alexis Korner] I sort of backed out and worked with one or two other groups, meeting up with Brian and Mick and Keith from time to time. So they asked me about kicking in with them. Honestly, I thought they were mad. I mean they were working a lot of dates without getting paid or even worrying about it. And there was me, earning a pretty comfortable living, which obviously was going to nosedive if I got involved with the Stones.

It made me laugh to think of them trying to get me in with them too. But I got to thinking about it. I liked their spirit and I was getting very involved with rhythm 'n' blues. I figured it would be a bit of an experiment for me and a bit of a challenge, too. So I said okay, yes, I'd join. Lots of my friends thought I had gone stark raving mad."

The really remarkable bit, which he only gets to in that later interview, was that his hesitations weren't just a few friends being nervous about his potential bandmates and making less money. Which were substantial issues on their own. The Stones were total pariahs in the London jazz scene:

"It's true to say nobody had a good word for them. They were complete outsiders. Nobody wanted to know about the great sound they were making - because everybody was too busy looking on them as just a gang of long-haired freaks. And I certainly wasn't keen on letting my own hair grow at that time just for the sake of being a member of the group."

If you see the Stones from the very early days, you can get sort of a sense of why people were telling Charlie to stay away. Before he got involved with them, he was in groups that looked like this:

And after:

That was them looking pretty respectable, too. It was a long standing difference, honestly:

Anyway, after expounding on why no drummer with steady work wanted to throw in his lot with them, Charlie explained:

"But this bunch of outsiders, what people called 'lay-abouts,' struck me as having a pretty good future. I thought the atmosphere they got going simply had to make it big one day."

The best analogy I can come up with is someone (a very nice and softhearted someone) walking through a dog shelter, stumbling upon a litter of slightly odd looking puppies with a bunch of problems who only do weird tricks that no-one wants, and saying 'I'll take them all!’ Because he thinks with a little love and help they could be just as great as the ones they got passed over for. And then actually keeping them, and doting on them, for the rest of his life.

It was a good choice, though. In the end he got, just as he predicted, a very successful band. And something that would have been much harder to foresee; two guys to love as "brothers" of his own for 60 years, and two guys who loved him back, at the very least, just as much.

[kiwibirbs-library]

Nightmares

a/n: so like.. uhh... how’s your day? Cause mine said work and think of this babe the whole time. Oh you too? Cool cool.

YALL THIS IS AFTER I WROTE THIS ITS SO LONG OMG OK I NEED TO GO READ THROUGH WOW

Pairing: Keith kogane x reader

Warning: uhh nightmares ya ya that. That’s it

Summary: you get nightmares, fairly bad done at that. And one night you just can’t do it anymore and go to the nearest occupied room. And suddenly it becomes a tradition.

You were rescued from a prison break. The only thing that made you special was that your entire planet was massacred and you had absolutely nowhere to go.

That was almost 6 months ago.

That’s how you ended up where you are now. In a near empty room of the castle, trying to fall back asleep. This was the fifth time you had a nightmare this week. This was the fifth time you had had to relive the vivid torture. The fifth time you’ve been curled up in a ball, tears streaming, trying to just breath through it.

After about 10 minutes you sat up. You couldn’t keep doing this. You couldn’t keep going off of two hours of sleep. You really couldn’t keep hearing Shiros ‘you ok?’ Every morning when you showed up looking like the living dead.

You grabbed your blanket and wrapped it around yourself before waking to the door. The faded walking lights were enough to keep you from hitting anything as you stopped at the nearest door. Hopefully it was someone who could help you. Just to talk to if you could. In other words— as much as you enjoy him— not Lance. You gulped as you knocked on the door. You weren’t expecting it to open as soon as it did.

Keith stood in the open door way, rubbing an eyes slightly as his vision adjusted to see you clearly.

“Y/n?” His voice was raspy from not talking for a while.

“Um hi,” your voice broke in the middle. His brows furrowed as he noticed your stained cheeks and red nose.

“Are you ok?” He squinted at you a bit, still not completely able to see you.

“Uh actually could I um... stay here for a bit.... please,” it all came out whimpery and cracked. You felt kind of pathetic. You half expected him to tell you where Shiro was and go back to sleep with how long he took to respond. But no. He backed up a bit and gave you room to come in. You smiled a little up to him and shuffled in. He sat on his bed and watched you slightly as you made your way down to the floor.

He didn’t exactly know why but he didn’t like the idea of you laying there. It was clean sure, and he definitely would have let anyone else sleep there, but he couldn’t in good conscious just leave you there. Especially with how red and wet your face was when you passed him. He cleared his throat a bit and you looked up at him from your spot. He patted the mattress beside him and you got the idea, getting up and sitting next to him.

“So... what’s wrong?” He looked at your hands as they twisted into each other. You bit your lip.

“Um well, lately I’ve been having these.. um... nightmares. There of the time in the prison. And the um... things that happened,” you gulped. There was a slight pause.

“You don’t have to force yourself to talk if you can’t,” Keith sighed a bit. You looked over to him to find a surprising look of worry on his face. You were taken aback by how understanding he looked. From what you knew of him he was that loner of the group, the one that didn’t talk much and did his own thing, only worrying about himself (and Shiro as you observed). But sitting next to you wasn’t someone that didn’t know feelings of others. It was more like someone who could understand what was happening with you.

“I get nightmares too you know. Of course I’ve never been tortured like you or Shiro were, but they still get to me pretty bad,” he said bluntly, leaning back on his hands. You sighed and brought you knees to your chest, a tired look in your eyes. “You can go to sleep if you want, it would be good for you,” he said without looking at you.

“Thank you,” you smiled a little. “You know, your a lot nicer than I thought you would be one on one,” you laid down slowly.

“I’ll take that as a complement?” His words had the slightest sound of amusement with them. It brought a calming blanket down on you.

In no time your were completely knocked out, Keith leaning up against the wall, also falling asleep as he made sure you didn’t wake up.

~~~~

There was a vibrating from under your head, waking you up. You weren’t fully awake as you felt the air on your skin without opening your eyes. You felt something come underneath the pillow and stop the movement before leaving. Your brows furrowed slightly as you moved even closer to wherever the thing had come from. Without moving much you hit something, immediately running a hand down the back of it before falling back to sleep.

Keith was also awakened by a vibrating. More than you obviously as this was his alarm every morning. So when he turned it off to keep you to sleep and you moved closer he very much noticed. And then your hand ran down his back and made him shiver. He was a blushing mess. He couldn’t even say anything as you stuffed your face into his chest and stayed asleep. Without even knowing it he was smiling at you, moving some hair from your face before he thought about it. You pushed yourself forward a little more, turning him onto his back as you used him as a body pillow. For the first time in a while he had to hold back a laugh at the movement.

You both stayed like that for almost an hour before you groggily got up finally. When you saw the position you immediately started apologizing for what happened. He waved you off, his normal stern face back as he sat up and met you in the middle of the room.

“Calm down its fine, I don’t really care. Anyways we should leave, we’re about to have the morning meeting,” as if the castle could hear him the intercom turned on with a loud beep and Alluras voice came on.

“Meeting time! Hunk made food as well,” and she was gone. You smiled at the idea of Hunks cooking.

“Oh shoot I need to change,” you looked down to your pajamas.

“Meh Lance Never does don’t worry about it,” in truth Keith was just stalling to continue seeing you in them. He really didn’t understand why but he liked the sight. You both left his room before walking the halls to kitchen. Mostly everyone was there, the only one not was Lance unsurprisingly. You waved a bit as you took a seat next to Pidge, Keith to you. They looked at you both with a smile before going back into their talk about something technical.

You tried to listen as you ate but your thoughts drifted to the night before and this morning. A light pink hit your face at the thought. You smiled a little as you put the spoon to you mouth.

~~~~

These sleepovers quickly became something usual. In some instances you wouldn’t even go back to your room, just straight to his with him. At one point he told you to bring some clothes over to change so now you had your little pile in the corner of dresses and shirts. The most awkward part of it would have to when you both began cuddling consciously. You felt hot as Keith put a very hesitant arm on you, his constant ‘is this ok?’s making you laugh a bit.

You didn’t know when but at some point you started taking the sessions in for more. You would always smile at the thought of Keith. Your eyes would always wonder the room in search of him. If the found his you would gaze for a moment before looking away.

Keith knew exactly when he took after hours for more. He knew exactly what he was doing when went to his room at the end of the night, waiting impatiently for you to show up. He knew exactly what he wanted when he asked you to bring some clothes over, his idea for you to spend more time there working amazingly.

The day you got found out though was the most embarrassing moment of your life. Even worse than Pidge calling you out for staring at the boy. For one thing you were more tired than usual that morning due to training the previous day. So while reaching for a pair of leggings you missed and grabbed Keith’s spare sweatpants. Honestly you didn’t even think about how big they were as you threw on your jacket and left. Keith had left before you to meet with Shiro so you were alone and the first in the breakfast hall. By the time you stood up everyone was there as well. Keith’s hand flew to his face to hide the bright red that flushed his face when he noticed. He wasn’t going to say anything, he didn’t really want to. He would have to resist the urge to hide your normal pjs in favor of you wearing his for the next week.

“Aren’t those a little big on you?” Pidge commented.

“Huh?” You looked down and blushed a bit at the clothing. “O-oh ya, haha. Um i saw them at the mall we went to the other day and picked them up,” you coughed.

“Wow really those look like what Keith was wea—“ Lances mouth was covered and his head was dragged down by Keith’s arms. Everyone looked between you two with skeptical look before you slip out the door with a ‘well then’.

That was the catalyst of Lance following Keith to his room and hour later. He was droning on about something when Keith stopped in front of his door. He never had time to clean up this morning. Your clothes were probably still scattered in different areas. He cleared his throat.

“What?” He looked to Lance you was waiting patiently for the door to open.

“Oh I wanted to see what your room looked like. I’m bored and have nothing to do today,” he gave a dramatic sigh. Keith blocked the door.

“No.”

“Whaaat?? Why nooooott? How long have we known each other? Shouldn’t we have more trust????” Lance whined. “Besides whaaat Y/n in here the other day?”

“No,” Keith stayed. Then you came down the hall. You had went to your room in search of a pair of pants before realizing they were still sitting on the edge of Keith’s dresser. Maybe your other jacket was still on his bed if you were lucky. When you saw Lance you made a turn to leave the way you came too late.

“Y/n?” Lance called. You stopped and turned back to him.

“Hey Lance, what’s up?” You smiled a bit and walked a little closer. Keith was happy to hear your voice but also bit his lip at the predicament. You were probably looking for your favorite leggings. The ones you left here the other night. Bad timing.

“Oh I was wanting to see inside Keith’s room! What about you?” You continued talking to Lance, at one point giving Keith a side glance to say to go in. He quickly slipped into his room and started picking up your things and hastily putting it places, most went under his bed. In all honesty he didn’t mind too much about everyone finding out about your sleepovers. He did mind however about the teasing that would come with it.

The door clicked and slid open, Lance walked in with a nervous you glancing around after him.

“Wow it’s so boring in here,” Lance sighed, draping himself over on top of you. “There’s nothing in here how do you live like thi—“ he stopped when he looked over the floor. He saw something light blue poking out from under the bed. Keith tensed when lance moved it out with his foot. The jacket dragged out a few more clothes with it, all definitely not Keith’s and very obviously yours.

“Y/n did you know your clothes are— OH MY GOD NO WAY!!” He jumped away from you and looked between you and the mullet boy. “YOU TWO ARE A THINGGG??”

“No no we’re not!” You held up your hands and tried to explain. You missed Keith’s small and inaudible ’yet’.

“Then why are your clothes here? Are there more?!” Lance asked, gesturing to the small pile on the floor.

“Um well, sleepovers?” You rubbed your hands together. Lance turned to Keith.

“What does that mean?”

“Well what do you think a sleepover means? Honestly,” he crossed his arms. Lance turned back to you.

“How many times??”

“Ah ha ha um... multiple?” You looked over to Keith to find he was already watching you. You whipped back to Lance. As if the universe told you you weren’t getting out of this easy, Pidge and Hunk passed by the open door. They peered in a you heard a little laugh.

“He finally figured it out? Hah we knew weeks ago,” the small girl laughed a little, pushing her glasses up.

“You two knew?!!!” Lance whined as he left the room to join those two in the hall. Keith, quicker than you would have thought, moved and pressed a button to close and lock the door. You heard a muffled ‘hey’ before footsteps that eventually faded away. He sighed. You gave a little laugh.

“That your first choice in hiding?” You giggled.

“Shut up,” he gave you a smile and a glance before flopping down on his bed with a groan. “This is why no one comes in here.”

“Aww I feel so special,” you giggled again as you climbed on top of him. You laid you head down as he dragged you completely on top of him. “By the way, about what Lance said.” Keith looked down to you. “What are we anyway?”

“Well, I’d prefer the privileges of boyfriend all the time. But if you wouldn’t then I don’t mind waiting,” you put yourself up on your arms at his directness.

“What?”

“What?” He repeated.

“Aren’t you supposed to be the closed off feelings guy? What was that?” You look at him bewildered.

“I will not hesitate to leave you here alone,” he gave you a playful glare. “Answer my sentence though.”

“What?”

“Do I get privileges?”

“I wouldn’t mind,” you looked away before sitting up fully. “You get to tell everyone though,” you smiled a bit.

“Ugh why,” he groaned and put his head to the side. His hands naturally rested on your hips. You both had been doing this so long you never even took it as something weird with the way you straddled him. You laughed a bit at him when he pinched your sides a bit.

“Deal?”

“Deal,” he smiled before pulling you a little closer and finally doing what he had been wanting to for the past month, finally kissing you.

[dreamescapeswriting]

Midnight Diner [M] ~ MYG

WORD COUNT: 3.5K

PAIRING: Tattoos!Yoongi x Fem!Reader

GENRE:  Smut, AU, Tattooist AU, Diner AU, friends to loves, touch her and you die vibes, established friendship, protective Yoongi

An old fashioned diner was not where you had pictured yourself working but here you were dressed in a pale pink dress with a white apron around the middle to look as though you worked as a vintage waitress from the '50s. It used to be a small cafe but the new owner decided that he wanted to turn it into a '50s diner so that it would become a well-known truck stop along the highway. Lots of people stopped by all of the time but not just because of the diner but because of a famous tattoo studio right next door run by one of your friends. Yoongi. He had two full tattoo sleeves each tattoo was designed by him and put onto his body by him or someone else he trusted with his life. 

"I'll be right with you sir," You said as the bell above the door chimed to let you know that the first customer of the day had walked in, you cleaned up the desk and turned around to see Yoongi waiting for his morning cup of coffee. Every morning like clockwork he would be waiting for you to open, watching from his apartment above the tattoo studio to see if you'd been in yet and then he would make his way down. 

"Take your time." You rolled your eyes at him playfully, telling him to sit wherever he wanted to but he would always pick the same spot, the bar stool in front of the till. You figured it was so he could keep you company and make conversation while the diner wasn't busy but that wasn't it at all. 

See Yoongi didn't see you as just a friend, to him you were someone he had to protect and he was going to do that until his last breath. It wasn't that he thought you needed protecting, lord knows you could look out for yourself but there was something about you that intrigued him. You were someone that he loved and cared for deeply not that he would ever admit that out loud to you or anybody else for that matter. Whatever it was about you made him want to stay around you all of the time was relaxing to him, with you he felt he could be his true self instead of his persona that everyone seemed to perceive him as, the tattooist that hated everyone he met or came into contact with.

"The usual?" He glanced up when he heard your voice and nodded, it was still quite early so the diner was empty apart from the two of you and the chef in the back. 

"Jack? Yoongi's usual," You called out with a giant smile on your face, it was now that Yoongi realised you were wearing makeup, it was the first time he'd ever seen you with so much on. 

"Oh? The lipstick." You mumbled as you caught his gaze staring at you,

"Keith wants us to look more in the part," You grumbled as you did a small spin in the dress showing off everything you were wearing, Yoongi's heart practically leapt out of his chest. You always looked breathtakingly beautiful but today there was an allure about you that made it harder to resist you.

"But you can't say anything Mr bleach blonde!" You cried out running your hands through his blonde hair that was recently dyed, he was always doing different things with it. When you first met him it was long and up in a ponytail dyed bleach blonde, then he went black, green and one time pink. The two of you had been best friends for three years ever since you started working at the diner, every morning he would come in and order the same thing. Black coffee, pancakes and a second coffee to go with it. Then he would do the same at night after closing up his tattoo studio. A herbal tea with whatever dinner you got to pick out for him, the two of you would eat together every night. Even if you were on the late shift. 

"Any famous clients today?" You teased as you began to clean around the bar with a dishcloth and some cleaning spray, 

"We have a very special client," He laughed as he continued watching you clean, 

"Who?" You knew Yoongi would never give you details if someone famous was truly going to him to get a tattoo but it was always fun poking him for information. It was the best of the best in his industry and even though his studio was right out on the highway people still came from far and wide to get tattooed by him.

"Well it would be her very first, she said she was nervous but she's got nothing to worry about." As soon as the words left his mouth you knew that he was speaking about you and you rolled your eyes, throwing the rag that had been attached to your apron at him. 

"I'm not getting it done today, I'm on the morning and late shift." You whined as you thought about going over there to get a tattoo. 

Both of you had been planning it for so long, doodling ideas that you had for a tattoo on your arm but never fully committing to it until Yoongi designed the perfect design for you. It was your birth flower and birthstone fused together with a crescent moon surrounding them and Yoongi's artwork made it look truly magnificent.

"But I've already drawn it up, you have to get it done eventually," You knew it was true and you wanted to but it was hard with how often you worked. 

"What about after I've shut and you've finished, you're my friend I don't mind doing it after hours," He reminded you before blowing into the scolding liquid and watching you. 

"That could be good...This weekend?" You suggested as you glanced at him, the door opening to reveal more customers walking through the door, he nodded before you went off to greet the couple taking them to a table. 

Yoongi left not long after finishing his breakfast and a second mug of coffee, leaving his money and an extra-large tip the way he always did whenever he was served by you and you were left the enjoy the rest of the busy day filled with bikers, families that were travelling on holidays and regular customers that came in almost every day. It was finally near closing time which meant Yoongi would be in any second to have dinner with you before you would head home for the night. 

"Hey sweet stuff," You glanced over your shoulder to see truckers walking through the door, usually truck drivers were some of the sweetest people you came across but towards the end of the night was when the worst of the worst came to come into the diner. Tired from driving all day, testosterone high from not being around their partners and thinking they could groop and touch whoever they pleased without consequences. 

"Take a seat, I'll be right with you." You did your best to appear confident in front of the six men who were all larger than you and walking towards you. Slipping by them you carried a tray of plates through to the kitchen and tried to calm yourself down to go and talk to them. Reminding yourself that they were just tired and rowdy after a long day and just needed to cool off. 

The bell signalled and you relaxed knowing that the person who came through was going to be Yoongi, no matter what, if he was around you were more calm and relaxed. 

"Hey, do you want the usual or something special?" You asked as a giant grin appeared on your face as soon as you saw Yoongi sitting at the bar stool by the till but Yoongi wasn't smiling. He looked tired and pissed off, as soon as he'd walked into the diner he could sense that something was off, normally you would be on the floor waiting for him not hiding in the kitchen. 

"Something special? Does that involve you hot cheeks?" You ignored the man at the table who yelled out to you, his friends all whistling as you stood unamused in front of Yoongi. 

"Listen-" Your hand gripped onto Yoongi's arm as you sent him a silent signal with your eyes not to bother saying anything, it wasn't worth the effort since they would leave soon enough but that wasn't soon enough for Yoongi. He wanted them out now since he could see just how uncomfortable you were with them in the diner. 

"How come he gets something special?!" Another one yelled before you walked over to their table, smiles and graces plastered across your face as you tried to keep a good face-up. 

"What can I get for you all?"

Time passed and you served the truckers before having your dinner with Yoongi. The two of you sitting together at the till and sharing food and stories from his day had been a slow one for him. Only booked clients had arranged to come in with short tattoos and he was bored of not getting to show his creative side. 

"Which is why you should have come to let me do yours," He complained playfully as nudged you,

"Okay, I'm a little scared of the needles," 

"I'll hold your hand baby," A deep voice said from behind you as the main man from the group came up to pay for their meals, 

"Maybe if you're a good girl I'll let you hold something else," He moaned dramatically before making some inappropriate thrusting movements with his hips and then everything was like a flash. Yoongi was no longer sitting beside you and the man was on the floor bleeding from his lip. 

Just like that everything seemed to be moving quickly, Yoongi was punching two men when another grabbed him and punched him in the face. Panic washed over you as you didn't know what to do first, you grabbed a tray from beside you and bashed the man holding Yoongi around the head and he let him go. 

"You little fucking whore," He boomed out ready to throw a punch but you kicked him in the groin before slapping him across the face with the tray again, his nose splurting blood out on the floor. 

"Get the fuck out of my diner," You hissed as you grabbed one of them by the ear lobe and began dragging the whimpering man to the door. Yoongi smirked from where he was standing as the men stumbled over to their trucks not saying another word. 

"Yoongi." You breathed out as you saw blood dripping from a cut on his lip and forehead, 

"I’ve got a first aid kit in the studio, I’ll be fine”. He shook his head trying to pass it off as though it was nothing and that he would clean it up but you began shaking your head, telling Jack to lock up for you as you dragged Yoongi out of the diner and over to his store. 

"I can look after myself," He mumbled as he suddenly felt like a baby with you dragging him around, he'd been trying to protect you in the diner but now he felt like a failure when you began kicking them out instead. 

"Shut up and let me do this," You mumbled as you walked through the door, sitting him down on one of the tattoo chairs and waiting for him to tell you where the first aid kit was. 

"Sit still before I poke you in the eye," You ordered as you sat across from Yoongi, the both of you squished onto the tattoo chair as you forced him to let you clean up the wound on his forehead. 

"It would heal with a bandaid," He mumbled poking out his bottom lip as you cleaned it up with some alcohol wipes and then placed a bright pink band-aid on top, smirking to yourself as he gave you an unimpressed stare. 

"It's pink-"

"It's cute," You reminded him as you began packing up the kit, 

"You're going to have to stop defending me at some point, you can't keep getting hurt because of me," You whispered as you remembered the last time Yoongi jumped in when someone had been making inappropriate comments at you, it hadn't ended well for the first guy and Yoongi was left with bruises and cuts too.

"But I want to protect you," You heard the sadness in his voice and you turned to look up at him not realising how close your faces were to one another until you almost headbutted him.

"Y-You don't have to protect me," You stuttered because of how close you were together and sighed shaking his head, 

"You don't get it," He mumbled trying to slide off the chair but you took his hand in yours, begging him to explain what you didn't "get",

"I'm in love with you," As soon as he told you it was as if a weight had been lifted from his chest and he stared at you waiting for you to run off. That was what happened the last time he told someone he truly cared about them but instead, you didn't, you slid down from the chair and cupped his face in your hands. Running your thumb over his soft skin before leaning forward and connecting your lips together. He was hesitant at first but as soon as he realised what was happening he wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you closer to his body. You were in love with him too and had been waiting so long to finally hear those words fall from his lips. 

Your lips touched yet again but this time he didn't hesitate against you, there was passion behind every peck and kiss he gave to you, his hands wandering up your sides as he picked you up, carefully placing you back onto the chair you had gotten off. As soon as his lips touched yours is like like your whole body became heated as if you were set on fire. The kiss made you feel as though you were alive and you pulled him closer, wrapping your legs around his waist to try and cause some friction between you, 

"I need you." You whimpered feeling needy as his hands touched your inner thighs, the skirt bunching up against your hips as you kissed him again, he grabbed fistfuls of your skirt and smirked as you let out a whine. 

"Say the word and I will stop," He whispered as he pulled away to look at you, you nodded before kissing him desperately wanting nothing more than his touch on your body. He kissed won your neck as he began to take off the dress you were wearing, throwing it somewhere behind him as you fought off the urge to hide from him.

"You're beautiful, you don't need to hide from me," He reminded you as his fingers trailed over every inch of exposed skin making you needier for his touch. Yoongi laid a gently kiss on your thighs and you cried out as you waited for something more. 

He worked his way down using his tongue to follow where his hands had touched, running his tongue over each of your nipples before kissing each of your thighs again. 

"Y-Yoongi," You whispered as he looked up at you, he had a wicked smirk on his face as he looked up at you, licking his lips as though he was about to eat his first ever meal. 

"Yes?" You whined at him as he blew cold air onto your exposed core making you whimper as he run his fingers through your folds your fingers dug into the leather chair as he used his tongue to glide through your folds. Your heartfelt as though it was about to stop as he continued to eat you out on the chair, growling against you as he heard your moans of approval at what he was doing. Every small flick of his tongue earned another moan from your lips, your head fell back against the chair and you were squirming and writhing around unable to keep your movements still has his tongue continued to work wonders on you. It wasn't long until the intensity began to build leaving you stunned and unravelled as you cried out his name cumming around his tongue. 

Yoongi smirked as he lifted his head his lips were swollen and glossy from your juices that were on him, you whimpered looking at the state of him. 

"F-Fuck," You growled pulling him onto the chair with you as you began to kiss him, his legs tickled your core as you ground against him, 

"Y/n," He breathed as his lips touched yours, kissing you all over as you began to whine for more from him,

"Touch me," You smiled as you kissed him, running your hands down to his trousers as you pushed them down, smirking to yourself as he let out a shaky breath. Kicking off his pants and looking at you as you run your hand over his hardness, running your thumb over his slit as his breaths became jagged and his body seemed to jerk. 

"D-Don't stop," He begged with his jaw clenched, fingers holding onto you tightly as you began to slow pump nim in your hand. Watching his face for all of the reactions he was giving you, his jaw pipped, lips parted as he let out moans. 

"Fuck," He moaned out as he rolled his head forward into your neck, biting down on your skin as you continued to pump him in your hand. 

"Your touch kills me," He whimpered as his hips began to move in the rhythm of your pumps, moaning out as you gripped a little tighter. 

"I-I need to be in you?" He asked it as a question wanting to make sure you were comfortable and you nodded, 

"I-I'm on the pill and I'm clean," You reassured him as you realised that neither of you was exactly prepared for this to happen, he kissed you softly lining himself up at your entrance. The tip of his cock made you clench around nothing as he slowly began to move into you. There was intense pressure for a moment and you weren't sure if he was going to fit, then there was a sudden sharpness as he sank into you holding himself deep as you cried out. 

"I-I'm sorry," He kissed you lovingly as he realised it was hurting you, but it wasn't a terrible pain it was just that the fullness was a little too much for you.

"I-It's okay, you're j-just big." You whimpered as he kissed you again, softly, and then he began to rest his head on yours waiting until you were ready for him to move but to be honest you would have been perfect laying there with him inside of you all night, it felt as though he was the perfect fit.

"Y-You can move," You promised him as you kissed him again, he began to move his hips slowly, you lifted your hips against him and it began to turn into intense pleasure, something you'd never experienced with anyone before. Your head was totally lost as he continued to move with you, the sound filling the room where your moans mixed together with soft sighs and whimpers as he pushed in and out of you passionately and lovingly. 

Yoongi worked his arm under your head and you wrapped your legs around his waist as he angled himself deeper inside of you, your stomach tightened as you felt yourself getting closer. He began to move faster, deeper his thrusts getting stronger as he looked into your eyes the feeling was intense. 

"Y-Yoongi," You breathed out as you could feel yourself trembling around him, it felt as though you were going to burst until you finally came undone around him without warning. Yoongi's features turned dark as his jaw tensed again, he lost control as his body pounded against yours making the chair move across the floor until his muscles flexed and his head rolled back, crying out and shuddering as he came undone inside of you. 

His head laid in your neck for a while before either of you began to move or speak, 

"I-I'll get us a hot bath." He whispered as he slid out of you, giving you his shirt to change into while he looked at you. 

"You're so fucking beautiful," He breathed out in a raspy voice as he looked at you, even after sex you were still just as beautiful as before. 

"Shut up," You whined following him up the stairs to his apartment so the two of you could clean up together and talk about what all of that meant. 

Tagline: @lyoongx​ @mitzwinchester​ @rjsmochii​ @taestannie​ @sw33tnight​ @sweeneyblue1​ @jin-from-the-block​ @acciocriativity​ @mwitsmejk​ @anxiousbobatea​

[dammitadolfnomorecake]

**Cultivating Love**46**

Secretly Allura had always dreamed of what her life would be if she wasn’t a princess. She dreamed of exciting adventures and envied those able to undertake them. Now she was on her own adventure and it was not how she envisioned it. When Pidge and Lance had attacked the terrace she’d wanted to cheer for them. Shiro silencing her and dragging her off in his hold, instead of simply pointing out that maybe cheering loudly wasn’t that good of an idea. She even had a divine weapon in her hands, and a band of friends by her side… all the things she could dream of to make the adventure extra special. Except… as bad as it was… she wanted to see Lotor.

Her Lotor and Lance’s Lotor were different people in her mind. She couldn’t fathom him betraying them all the way he had. Her heart ached in sympathy for what he must have been through, and her brain wanted to slightly stab him repeatedly for using her the way he had. He’d never come across as the pervert prince Lance called him, at least not to her, and her pride was most definitely dented over it. She didn’t know what she was lacking. Why she was not good enough. Yet seeing he was a horrid man, she was grateful that he was before she got herself hurt by him.

Lying on the roof between Shiro and Keith, the pair were watching the scene below. How they could stand back and stay objective showed their own personal strength. Maybe if she was stronger she could have charged right in there and done something? She knew it was important to gather information, yet she wanted to be helping people and not hiding on a slippery roof.

“Shouldn’t we be doing something?”

Keith sighed as the words slipped from Allura’s mouth. She was kind of envious that she hadn’t gotten to go with Pidge and Hunk, seeing she knew Keith and Shiro were stubborn beyond words. She’d also noticed that the four of them spoke differently since returning from the demon realm, especially Pidge, and would have liked to ask more about the differences there. Patiently, Shiro asked

“Allura, are you scared?”

The courageous dreamer in her wanted to deny it outright. She did not wish to be coddled by Keith and Shiro, but who was she kidding?

“A little. I don’t know how to use Blue and I do not know what to do”

“We’ll keep you safe”

“I don’t want to be kept safe. I wish to help… yet… what if Blue won’t allow me to use the blade? I’m not a divine spirit beast”

It was Keith that answered instead of Shiro

“Look, the way I see it, you have the patience of a god as it is for putting up with Shiro and I for those six months. Gods are divine. Hence, you must have some divinity of your own. Lance knew you could handle Blue, he didn’t make the decision only because of his arm. He choose you to take Blue”

She didn’t expect that from with, Allura’s cheeks warming. She may have developed feelings for him if he wasn’t taken by Lance and Shiro in both heart and mind, and the fact that was the gentlest thing he had ever said to her when not speaking of Lance

“I’m sorry”

“Don’t be sorry, just don’t hesitate when the time comes. We’ll follow the roof along to the far end, then drop down to walkway. The others know what they are doing”

Allura supposed they did. The fox Pidge had made was beautiful, if not a little surprising in how robust it’s construction was

“I…”

“If you’re going to apologise again, I’ll have to get mad”

Allura snorted at Keith

“I was going to say I will follow your lead”

Shiro chuckled at the pair of them

“Don’t mind him. You don’t need to apologise. Let’s get moving again. We need to find our way down to the Emperor”

They were going to the Emperor?

“Sorry, when did we decide this?”

Shiro cautiously got to his feet so he was crouched beside Allura

“Just now. There’ll be plenty of guards there, and hopefully we’ll find others along the way that can fight with us. Plus, there is also the possibility that when they sealed the royal family, they were unaware of the spell traps laid by Zarkon’s supporters. Just because that spell hasn’t been completed doesn’t mean that another has and there could be demonic forces flowing in as we speak. Watch your footing, princess”

Following Keith, Allura somehow managed to keep her feet beneath her and reach the end of the roof in one piece. The drop from the roof at the end of the terrace wasn’t onto the same sort of walkway they’d climbed up from. Lowering himself, Keith made the drop with ease, despite it being a good four metres down. Pausing, she knew she couldn’t make the same jump. She’d never made such a jump before. Shiro making her jump

“Keith will catch you”

“Are you sure?”

“We’re not about to let you get hurt here. Go”

Shiro didn’t let her jump for herself, instead pushing her forward. Allura’s stomach dropping for the short moment it took to fall into Keith’s arms, then flatted Keith in the process. Annoyingly, Shiro landed next to them as lightly as Keith had. Both of them glaring up at him as he chuckled, then offered his hand to her

“Don’t worry, I won’t tell Lance you jumped on Keith”

Taking Shiro’s hand, Allura’s glare was fierce

“I didn’t have the chance to jump, I was pushed off the edge”

“But were you really? Keith, are you okay?”

“Idiot. She didn’t have time to go limp. Help me up”

Allura stepped aside so Keith could get up, only he swept Shiro’s legs out from under him before jumping to his feet. Shiro much more slowly getting back on his. Obviously she hadn’t hurt Keith by falling on him, so she let herself giggle at the pair of them as Keith proudly stated

“Now we’re even”

“Really?”

Keith drew Black. Even if she was not divine in the same way as the others, Allura could feel the energy of Black. It was very different from Blue and Red… again she wished she’d asked the others for more information when she’d had the chance

“Yes. Allura, you weren’t hurt were you?”

“No, I’m quite alright, Keith. Thank you for catching me”

“It’s fine. You don’t weigh as much as Lance… wait, don’t tell him I said that”

“I won’t. Should I draw Blue?”

Patting her shoulder, Shiro shook his head

“Keith gets angry if he feels that he isn’t doing enough. Think of Black as his safety blanket”

“Black isn’t my safety blanket. Unlike you, I’m attempting to be prepared”

“And there you go again. This is why Lance teases you about your temper”

“He wouldn’t have to tease me if our realm wasn’t in danger”

“Then what about all the other times? Do we need to talk about it?”

“No, you need to stop showing off”

“Says you”

Giggling at the pair, they both turned towards her. Allura holding up her hands in mock surrender

“I’m sorry. I’m happy you two are speaking again so casually. Perhaps we should get moving? I don’t want to be found so easily thanks to you both bickering”

Shooting Shiro an annoyed look, Keith then started walking along the walling

“Well, what are you waiting for? Zarkon is hardly going to stop himself”

*

Despite the central forces gathered in the terrace, their group had come across another one of the hooded figures that had been keeping the hostages contained within the terrace. One moment Shiro had been by her side and the next Allura found herself caged by Keith’s body and the hooded stranger dispatched by Shiro. She wasn’t completely sure the stranger was dead until Shiro had taken them by the feet, dragging them out the hallway and into a side room. Clearly he’d done this before. All of it happened so fast that once again Allura felt lacking.

Following Shiro, Keith closed the door behind them. Shiro kneeling next to the figure as he peeled off their mask to reveal the face of a demon. A shudder ran down Allura’s spine. Despite being a demon, the person looked relatively young, no older than herself and at the very max Shiro.

“Keith, do you recognise them?”

“No. They weren’t in the pits with us”

“Okay. I’m going to seal their residual energy. Keep an eye on the door, take Allura out with you”

“Got it”

Following Keith outside the room, Allura didn’t understand why they’d followed Shiro in, only to be kicked out again

“What’s Shiro going to do?”

“Remove the heart. Normally demonic beasts rot away once they’ve been slain. In this case he’s removing the heart to prevent them from rising again. Once the heart is out, Shiro will purify it and it’ll crumble”

“Oh”

“We don’t do this often. Even if they would have chosen to return to battlefield mindless, they can’t voice their opinions when they’re dead”

“This is true. Keith, have you done this a lot? I mean… sneaking around and… doing this?”

“Not like this. Maybe once or twice in the last decade it’s been somewhere of importance. We both prefer a proper battlefield where those who die, die with honour. We’ll hold a bonfire for those corrupted once this has ended and hopefully their souls will be able to find peace”

There was something in Keith’s tone that made Allura think of Lance

“Lance will be alright”

Sighing at her, Keith gave the smallest of nods

“I know. I’m still worried. He easily fell for Sendak’s trap. I’m worried that he hadn’t ingested enough divine energy to keep his heart and mind pure”

“He seemed level headed enough”

“He wasn’t at all. I’ve been right there with him on more than one battlefield. He’s never been alright with taking a life. Not really, despite the circumstances. Plus, when he and Pidge get together they tend to bring out their competitive spirits thanks to Lance’s natural powers as a divine fox and Pidge’s illusions”

“Hunk will be okay too, right?”

Allura watched as Keith’s ears twitched. She doubted that Keith doubted Hunk, yet he probably did in the moment as he was not with Lance

“Hunk is a natural healer. He’s got strength and skills. He’s also the same as Lance and likely to go too far to protect those he loves… a bit like us. Um, I know this is not the right time, yet, thank you for everything. For saving Lance, and for your hospitality. I wasn’t the easiest person and I…”

“You don’t need to explain. As long as you three have talked, that’s all I need to know”

“We have. I miss and love Shiro, but the wound in my heart has faded, yet not left. Never mind, this is not the place”

“I’m sorry. I wanted to meddle when you were with me. You’re both so stubborn”

“So I’m told. I think perhaps you’re stubborn too, only hide it better”

Allura wanted to laugh, yet thought better of it seeing they were now inside

“I cannot deny that. There are a lot of things I wished I done. I wish I could have more faith. I wished I’d asked more about all of you”

“You’re fine the way you are. You can ask what you want to ask when we’re all together again”

“You know, I think the demon realm was good for you. You’ve been much gentler since you returned”

“You can blame Lance for that… Get back in the room, someone is coming”

“I can…”

“You can stay safe. Tell Shiro for me. The worst of it should be done by now”

Wanting to protest, Allura forced herself back into the room, making sure to close the door as quietly behind her as she could. Shiro had done what he’d needed to, the room smelling of blood badly enough for cover her nose. Wiping his hands off on the edge of his robe, Shiro frowned at her

“Allura?”

“Keith said someone is coming and sent me in”

“Right. Wait here. I’ll check the situation”

Again Allura wanted to protest… and again she did as she was told. Moving away from the door so Shiro could check outside. Too curious, she moved up behind him, peaking around Shiro but unable to see enough

“What is it? Is Keith okay?”

“Wait here. Keep the door shut”

“Wait…”

Shoved back by Shiro, the door was closed. It was then that Allura got another shiver up her spine. As she turned, to her horror the slain demon sat up. Its purple eyes fixing her straight in its undead gaze. Keith had only just told her moments ago this wouldn’t happen and now it had. Instead of remaining calm, Allura panicked, grabbing the door handle and trying her hardest to open it, only to find no give. She was trapped inside with a demon and no idea what to do, other than to hope Blue would accept her.

[thorin-is-a-cuddler]

Beach Rules

A/N: Paladins at the beach? Sure! Platonic everyone. This is Keith and Shiro centric. And there’s loads of tickling and simping, yay :D

„Is that…“

„No, it can’t be!!“

„Oh, but, but… guys, it’s…“

„A beach!“ Shiro stepped out of the castle, joining Pidge, Lance and Hunk on the surface of this vacation worthy planet with a disbelieving expression.

Allura followed, taking her helmet off and actually giving one of her rare honest smiles. „Yes, a beach. This is the planet of Basoria. 10 000 years ago, this planet has already been one of my favorite places to be. It seems incredible that the Galra haven’t taken over it. But since there are no intelligent beings on here, they probably didn’t see the point. It’s a save place. Coran and I wanted to offer you this. A day off at the beach. With everything you’ve already done, paladins, I am happy if I can give you something back.“

The three younger paladins shrieked happily, shouting their thanks as they took off running for the shore, shoes flying and jackets landing in the sand. Shiro turned his head to look at Allura with a smile. „This is amazing, Allura. I think you couldn’t have made them happier.“

Allura tilted her head and put a hand on Shiro’s left arm. „I was hoping you would enjoy this as well, Shiro. You have been working harder than anyone of us. You deserve a day’s rest.“

Shiro opened his mouth in surprise, a little overwhelmed by so much attention and a little lost for words. Fortunately Keith chose excatly this moment to step out between them, a grumpy expression on his face. „A beach?“ He asked with a raised eyebrow, obviously sceptical about something that involved such a big amount of fun.

Allura narrowed her eyes at him in annoyance, having hoped for a rather different reaction. „Yes, Keith. A beach. A place for relaxation and happiness. I’m glad to see that it disgusts you so much.“

Allura went to take off her armor inside the castle, mumbling intelligibly under her breath. Keith merely sniffed and shrugged as the princess moved away, crossing his arms over his chest and looking outside with a wary expression. Three cheerful paladins were splashing around in turquoise water. They were still dressed in t-shirts and pants, but didn’t seem to care a bit about the additional soaked weight. Keith had never seen them this outgoingly happy.

He felt a weight on his shoulder and saw that Shiro had put his hand on it, an encouraging smile on his face. „Go on, Keith. Don’t worry so much. I bet it’s fun out there. Give it a try.“

Keith tilted his head slightly and looked away, a little crease appearing between his eyebrows. „Hmmm. I don’t know, Shiro.“

The warm dark eyes of the older paladin changed, giving room for worry. This guy managed to catch up to everything. „What is it?“

Keith huffed and shook his head slightly, fond of Shiro being so perceptive, yet at the same time wishing he weren’t. „It’s just… I don’t know. I- I’ve never… well, I’ve never been to a beach before. My father and I never went on vacations, you know.“

Keith shuffled around slightly, trying to act as indifferent as he could, while he was actually dying from insecurity inside. He sent a tentative side glance in Shiro’s direction and saw the realization in his expression. Keith smiled and shielded his eyes against the sun.

„I think it’ll come naturally to you, Keith.“ Shiro said softly, making Keith look at him again in surprise. „All we have to do is go out there and… do the next best thing.“

Keith blinked at him, pretty unsure about this much spontaneousness. „And what would that be?“

Shiro put his finger on his lips thoughtfully, making Keith start to consider that maybe Shiro had just as little clue what to do at a beach as he had. His features softened a little at that impression. Where Shiro knew pretty much everything about him, there was little Keith knew about Shiro in connection to his past. Shiro kept most things locked away behind so many doors that walking through all of them could take years. Keith had barely managed to walk through the half of them.

He sighed deeply and slid out of his jacket, leaving it in the castle. „Let’s start by making ourselves more… beach ready.“ Keith made an awkward motion towards his t-shirt and then bent over to take off his shoes and roll up the legs of his pants.

Shiro smiled at that and copied Keith’s actions, stripping to his sleeveless muscle shirt and rolling his pants up as well. For a second he was insecure about the bulgy skin where his right shoulder merged into the metal arm. But then a sudden feeling took over him and made him forget about any insecurities. Was that… giddiness he felt in his stomach?

There suddenly was so much energy inside of him that he had to get rid off. He looked at Keith staggering around on one leg as he tried to keep the material of his pants rolled up on the other leg. And a grin spread out on his face.

He suddenly knew exactly what he had to do.

„Keith..“

Keith looked up in time to manage a very surprised yell, before a very strong arm wrapped around his middle and lifted him off the floor. „SHIRO WHAT ARE YOU-“

„I know what we have to do!“

Keith clawed his fingers into Shiro’s foreram, holding on to him tensely as the pilot started running with Keith dangling from his side, shaking him quite thoroughly. Despite that Keith almost sighed in relief as fresh air ruffled his hair and blew under his shirt, giving him goosebumps and drying his sweat. It felt like flying through the desert with Shiro all over again. The memory of their races untied a knot in Keith’s chest and he suddenly had to let out a laugh as Shiro readjusted his grip on him, lifting him even higher than he’d been before.

„Don’t drop me!!!“

Shiro’s smirk was audible in his words as he raised his voice as well. „Oh, I will drop you in a bit!“

Keith tensed up again and looked to where Shiro was headed. Pidge, Hunk and Lance in the water had noticed their approach by now, curious happy smiles on their faces as they got closer at a dizzying speed. The realization hit Keith and he started struggling, almost causing Shiro to drop him himself.

„NO YOU WILL NOT! DON’T YOU DARE! SHIRO!“

But Shiro wasn’t bothered by Keith’s defiance in the slightest. His soft laughter mixed with Keith’s gasps and yelps and put a warm feeling in his shaking stomach.

Keith’s struggles grew stronger the closer they got to the water, forcing Shiro to swing Keith’s in front of his chest to be able to hold him there with both his arms.

Keith’s fists drummed against Shiro’s forearms, as the pilot reached the shore and took a few steps into the water. How Shiro managed to stay strong enough to hold him like that with all his laughter was a freaking mystery to the paladin of the red lion. „Enough with the violence,“ Shiro chuckled, „Time to cool your head!“

Keith’s knees were pulled up to his chest and he was eagerly trying to keep himself in that pulled up position by wrapping his hands around Shiro’s head behind him and holding on. „I DON’T THINK SO!!“

„Oh, but you will let go,“ Shiro growled, a playful tone to his voice that made Keith’s stomach drop.

„YOU CAN’T MAKE ME!!“

„Ah, Keith, you really bring this upon yourself,“ Shiro chuckled and kept his metal arm wrapped around Keith’s middle, the other suddenly dangerously unoccupied and close to his side and ribs and this was when it clicked, but too late.

„SHIRO WAIT-“ Keith shouted out in panic, trying to pull himself up higher to get away, but it was to no use. Shiro’s fingers were already squeezing his side and making their way up and hell on earth, it tickled so much, Keith had never thought anything could tickle this much.

Any plans for holding back his giggles were diminished immediately, as he broke out into hysterical squeals and deep uncontrollable laughter, twitching around like a fish as Shiro’s fingers were crawling up his side, over his ribs and right in the center of his exposed armpit. He really meant to keep his hands behind Shiro’s head, pulling at his hair to keep from being dropped. But forget that, he couldn’t take this without fighting back. It felt like Shiro was tickling him with twenty fingers at least where he was only using five and it wasn’t fair and it led to Keith’s unavoidable fate.

„SHHIHIIHRO NOHOOO PLEEEHEHEHEASE!!“

„I won’t stop until you let go!!“

„BUT THEN YOU’LL DROOHOHOP MEE!!“

„Beach rules, Keith. You are obligated to have fun!“

One last arch in Shiro’s arm, then Keith couldn’t stand it anymore and he tore his arms down, trying to push Shiro’s assaulting hand as far away from his ticklish torso as possible, when it was already time for a dive in the waves of Basoria.

Keith shrieked, when Shiro’s arms suddenly stopped holding him, honest to God shrieked - as if he’d needed any more embarrassment in front of the others. The cold water caught him quite gently though. There were no burns at the impact of the water, there was no water shooting up his nose. There was just a nice feeling of floating around and having his hair fly around his head.

He welcomed the feeling happily. But only for a few seconds. Then his wish for revenge grew too strong and he speedily made his way back up to the surface. He managed to find a stand on the sandy underground, the water up to his chest where it had been up to Shiro’s waist.

Shiro. With narrowed eyes and wet hair clinging to his forehead he saw Shiro quickly making his way deeper into the water, looking over his shoulder, laughing breathlessly.

„OH YEAH YOU BETTER RUN!! JUST YOU WAIT TIL I GET YOU BACK!“

Shiro almost slipped from laughter at Keith’s bubbly attempts oto swim after him, completely out of breath, but fueled with the desire to give him a taste of his own medicine.

In the meantime Pidge was busy climbing on top of Hunk’s shoulders in her soaked shirt, where she held on to Hunk’s hair with one hand, pointing at Shiro with the other and letting out a war cry that would have scared away Galrans. „FUGITIVE ON THE RUN! GO GET HIM! AID OUR TORTURED FRIEND!!!“

Keith almost sunk under the surface from his surprised laughter. He hadn’t expected the others to come to help him. They liked to watch Shiro tickle him into madness during sparring matches rather comfortably. But this. Maybe this was also part of the beach rules. Everyone against the strongest one. It seemed like a good rule to Keith.

Shiro on the other hand was barely able to bring much more distance between himself and the others as panicked laughter started to slow him down. Lance was gaining on him, as Hunk grabbed Pidge from his shoulders and used all his strength to throw her in Shiro’s direction, getting her closer to him as well.

Shiro thought it clever apparently to change tactics and stopped swimming in the one direction to make his way in the other one now.

Keith had to chuckle as he heard Shiro’s breathless gasps for air get closer. Alright, if this was a fun time at the beach he was sold. Now they only had to catch him.

„YOU GUYS, THIS ISN’T FAIR!!“ Shiro shouted, smiling widely as Pidge and Lance were getting awfully close.

„BEACH RULES!!“ Keith yelled as he too was getting closer to Shiro who was trying to make his way to the shore to be able to run away. He’d be way too fast for the other paladins if he managed to reach it. They couldn’t let him get away.

„Oh no, you will NOT!!“ Lance exclaimed passionately as Shiro was stumbling to his feet in the ankle high water. The plue paladin took a large dive and actually managed to pull Shiro down with a splash. The two of them rolled over in the warm part of the water, Shiro breathless from laughter already while Lance was yelling almost as loud as Pidge had before.

„You did it, Lance!“ Keith cheered as he too got to his feet in the low water, throwing himself on top of the other two. Shiro groaned with laughter at the additional weight and tried to push the two of them off of him.

„Now, just wait a second, just wait…“ Another weight took away Shiro’s breath as Hunk dropped down on top of Keith, slowly but successfully building a sandwich.

„We have him! Do we have him?“ Hunk spluttered and looked at his two friends underneath himself. Keith held up a thumb, despite the lack of air.

„We’ve got him! You guys are the best!!“

Pidge arrived with a wide smile on her face and was a bit reluctant to putting herself on top of the three boys as well. She didn’t have to anyway. Instead she dropped down next to Shiro’s face and grinned at him evilly.

„Ha, you didn’t see that coming, did you?“

Shiro glared at her, still out of breath, but he just couldn’t keep it up and a soft, playful expression was back on his face again in no time. „I guess Voltron’s bond must be really strong already. Just don’t lose your head in the process…“

All four of them groaned inexplicably loud at this bad pun and Pidge felt no sympathy for him in the slightest as she told the other three to give him hell just for that. Even though he was pretty doomed in his current position. He couldn’t move out from underneath the three boys and all of them put their hands to good use some place on his tall upper body. Hunk was pinching his sides, as Keith worked his hands under his arms and Lance immediately used his position for good access to Shiro’s ribs.

Pidge was blessed with the picture of Shiro throwing his head back in ticklish agony, his eyes squeezed shut and his mouth opened in the brightest smile, as beautiful laughter was shooting out of him.

He couldn’t fight off six hands with just two and Keith enjoyed strongly making him laugh this hard, especially with the aid of his friends. He could tell that Shiro was very fine with them having their fun like this and it warmed Keith’s heart that Shiro was so selfless and soft in every situation. He looked at Shiro throwing his head from side to side, shaking with incessant giggles and trying to arch his back against the overwhelming sensations and he just knew that Shiro would never stop doing whatever it took to make him happy and have fun despite the times they were living in.

He knew that there was no „Voltron losing their head“. Shiro’s love was the starting point of all bonding among the paladins. He was the heart of the group.

Keith certainly knew that. And the others would at the very latest agree now that Shiro’s determination had managed to connect all paladins in having fun together.

[corvus--rex]

The last one was the prequel to this one, which I actually wrote first. It's not even the beginning of the main story, but it was what I came up with first. Oh well. I wanted to do cyberpunk without it being Leakira (which I do love, I just wanted to do something different), and came up with this. I have played the shit out of Shadowrun tabletop, so a lot of it comes from that. And since it's part of the last post, it's still an Omegaverse :)

~*~*~*~

Lance backed away, raising his hands. “Hey, no need for that. I’m not even armed.”

The mercenary pointed with his weapon.

“Over here?” Lance asked, still playing the game. “Ok.” He walked over to the window of the high-rise. “Might want to watch that draft. Wouldn’t want to come down with something.”

His hard-wired comm picked up everything, making the assassin on the ledge outside chuckle. But he knew that it was his cue, and punched through the window feet first, his tech-enhanced boots forcing through the thick glass easily. The black monofilament blade glowed red with heat, cauterizing the sliced wound to the mercenary’s throat and killing him instantly. Lance pulled out a modified holdout pistol, taking out the overpaid mercenary that followed with perfect aim.

“Red! On your nine!” Lance yelled above incoming fire.

A small knife flew, catching the mercenary in the throat. Keith used his falling body as a springboard, launching himself at the next target. Both he and Lance heard the same thing over their comms.

“Comin’ in hot!” Shiro yelled.

Lance and Keith both knew what that meant. That meant that this semi-stealth mission was turning into a Russian stealth mission, and that it was coming in the form of Hunk’s gatling gun. Soon enough, they both heard the whine of a spinning barrel and the screaming of rapid laser fire. Mercenaries were still pouring in and the teammates knew that they would still have to fight their way out. Lance had already retrieved the files and uploaded Pidge’s traceless virus. All they needed to do was get out.

Keith spun in the air, knives flying, carving a path to the exit. As he turned, he caught sight of a mercenary coming up a little too quickly behind Lance. His violet eyes went wide, launching himself off walls, furniture, and bodies.

“BLUE!” he screamed as the mercenary drew a small pistol and fired.

Lance’s gasp caught in his throat, his free hand going to the exit wound in his chest and dropping to the floor. This was wrong. These were just mercenaries. And the Voltron Pack always wore heavily modified body armor. There was no way something so small should have been able to punch through that. In a blind rage, Keith hit the mercenary hard enough to pin him to the floor, drawing the ultraviolet hard-light blade he kept on his back. Pressing his thumb to a bioscanner on the hilt, the small knife expanded in an instant to the straight-edged ninjato, which he plunged through the mercenary’s chest plate. He turned the blade back, jamming it into its sheath.

“Blue’s down! We need evac! NOW!”

The laser bolt from the pistol meant that Lance’s wound was cauterized and he wouldn’t bleed out, but it didn’t keep him from going into shock. Keith barely had the presence of mind to retrieve both Lance’s and the mercenary’s weapons before returning to the marksman.

“Stay with me. Come on, Blue. Team’s coming. I need you to hold on. You’ll make it.” Keith was rambling, and he knew it. But he couldn’t help himself as he watched the light in his Alpha’s blue eyes dim.

The sound of electricity and the smell of ozone whipped past Keith’s senses, a small blur following. Several mercenaries dropped, the blur that was Pidge spinning, her electrified katar flying through the next throng. A powered whine and sharp crack felled a line of mercenaries, Allura quickly moving on to the next group with her whip. Knowing that backup had arrived, Keith focused on keeping Lance awake. The Alpha was only barely conscious, the bolt having blown straight through his lung.

“Come on, baby. Stay with me. Team’s here. We’re getting you out.”

Keith was desperately trying to keep his scent hopeful, but the fear and panic saturating his mate’s was overwhelming. Lance was afraid of dying, and it was looking like a very real possibility. The Alpha’s hand moved, a brief jerking spasm. Keith took it, pulling the tactical glove off and holding it to his face, softly kissing his mate’s palm.

“You’ll be ok. We’re getting out.”

Pidge came up, putting a gentle hand on the Omega assassin. “All clear. We need you to get him to the extraction point. Allura’s got the body of the one that got him.”

Keith hadn’t even noticed it was gone. But he had a new mission objective. Get his mate to safety. He shoved both weapons – Lance’s and the mercenary’s – into Pidge’s hands, and picked his mate up in a bridal carry, racing to the extraction point. Shiro was in the pilot’s seat of their VTOL, a specially built, modular one the Coalition named Atlas. Hunk and Allura were already onboard, Pidge bringing up the rear behind Keith. Allura rushed to help the Omega assassin. The limited medical supplies on the Atlas wouldn’t save Lance in the long run, but it was enough to get him back to base.

The Coalition Rebellion’s base was hidden within a high-rise owned by shell companies belonging to the financial backers of the rebellion. The three biggest supporters were Olkarion BioTech, owned and run by Claudia Ryner, a thin middle-aged woman who could flip between hard-ass CEO and a gentle maternal figure in a split second, Taujeer Chemicals, owned and run by a man only known as Baujal who never showed his face and always used a voice modulator, and The Garrison, manufacturers of weapons, armor, and vehicles, owned and nominally run by Ellen Sanda and more practically run by Cmdr. Iverson. They all wanted the megacorporation that ran the world, Daibazaal Industries, gone as much as everyone else.

The Atlas landed on the grounds of the Rebellion base, known only to the Coalition as the Castle of Lions. Medics were waiting to rush Lance to the medical floors, leaving Keith on the landing pad feeling like his soul had been ripped from his body. The rest of the Voltron Pack surrounded him protectively, and the worry, panic, and fear he’d kept carefully bottled up overwhelmed him and he dropped to the asphalt.

When the assassin woke, he was in a med floor bed. Pidge had set up a work station in the room, the weapon and punctured armor of the mercenary being run through her meticulous scanners. Hunk tinkered with Shiro’s cybernetic arm while Allura paced like a caged tiger. Keith sat up, a wave of dizziness making him lay down again. It got the attention of everyone in the room. Pidge adjusted the bed’s position remotely, allowing Keith to sit up without falling over. They were all at his side immediately.

“Surgery was successful,” Allura told him, “Lance will make a full recovery. He’s still out, and they want him in a completely neutral environment. The only medics allowed in are Betas.”

“I can’t see him?” Keith asked, worry and panic clouding his scent again.

“Not yet,” Shiro said, “He still needs to heal, and you know that pheromones can interrupt that process. Even a bonded mate’s.”

“I could probably get in, check up on him for you,” Pidge offered. There were few cases like Pidge where, even if the corporate-run nanny state hadn’t mandated sterilization for all Betas, she would most likely have done it anyway. The benefit in this case was that she was less likely to upset Lance’s healing.

“Please?” The Omega couldn’t keep the whining cry for his mate out of his voice.

Pidge nodded, placing a small hand on his arm.

“Oh!” Hunk said, darting over to the other side of the room. He came back with a high stack of blankets and pillows. “The medics don’t want you moving around much yet, but we figured you’d feel better with at least a small nest.” He went back, returning with another blanket in a sealed bag. “I went and got this one from your room.”

Keith didn’t need elaboration. He instinctively snatched the bag from Hunk’s hands, holding it close. They were his pack, and fully understood the state he was in. Pidge queued further processes for her scanners and left to check on Lance. Hunk went with her, as he was the only other Beta in the pack and could back her up when they got there. Shiro and Allura were the pack’s other Alphas, and while they wanted to see their packmate safe, they knew they couldn’t be near Lance. They could, however, ensure the safety of their pack’s Omega, and so stayed with him, only assisting with the nest when it was asked for.

Even with limited nesting materials, Keith still was able to build one that made him feel more secure, the soft fluffy blanket from the nest he shared only with his mate adding to the security. The shrill, distressed trill coming from him died down only when he fell asleep, wrapped in his mate’s scent and knowing that his pack’s two other Alphas were nearby.

When Keith woke next, Hunk and Pidge were back. He shot up in his nest, a soft questioning noise rolling up his throat.

“He’s doing better,” Pidge answered. She turned around. “It’s been about six hours since we left to check on him. They said that you can probably see him tomorrow morning, which is in,” she checked the time, “About four hours.”

“You should eat and rest,” Allura suggested softly. “If you’re exhausted and upset when you see him, it could make things worse.”

Keith knew she was right, but it didn’t make it better. He wanted his mate, his Alpha. He’d had to watch when he was shot, when he fell to the floor, had to watch as his beloved Alpha desperately clung to life. He wanted them to curl up in their nest together, safe in each other’s arms. The memories caused another distressed sound, this one harsher, even more shrill than before. The pack snapped to look at him, knowing that if Keith got any more worked up, he could go feral. It was a state more closely associated with Alphas, but it was certainly possible for Omegas. The kind of trauma he’d experienced that day combined with being separated from his mate was making things dangerous for him. Pidge dropped what she was doing, climbing into the nest. She was a packmate and therefore safe, but she was about as far removed from anything like Lance as possible and, therefore, was the safest person to be close to Keith. He curled up, still upset, but allowed her to hold him, reinforcing that he was safe.

It didn’t take long for him to fall asleep again.

He was woken next by Pidge gently shaking him, breakfast in hand. He accepted it, a soft sound escaping, his Omega brain still in control. After breakfast, that Pidge actually joined him in his nest for, she called for a medic, who came in and checked Keith over, clearing him for release. Pidge stuck close to him, going along to the next floor where Lance was still under medics’ care. But he was awake, and Keith darted inside, Pidge staying by the door.

The Omega curled up on his mate’s bed, softly nuzzling him. Lance ran his fingers through his mate’s hair, a large medical patch monitoring his biorhythms across the back of his hand. After a few minutes when Keith still hadn’t said anything he looked to Pidge, concern and confusion written across his face.

“He nearly went feral last night. Hasn’t spoken a word since then,” she explained.

The medics tried to make Keith leave when they were alerted to Lance’s shifts in his system caused by the sudden fear for his mate, but the Alpha insisted on his Omega staying. Pidge left, knowing Alpha-Omega mate-pairs in general and her packmates in particular. She knew how important their connection was and that if they were separated both would most likely turn feral, attacking anyone who got too close that wasn’t their mate. Shiro and Allura stood guard over the room from the outside, preventing anyone from entering they didn’t approve. One nurse claimed that she was just there to check up on Lance, but her scent told them she was lying and that she was most likely there to try and separate the pair again. Shiro’s tall, broad frame firmly kept her out. Pidge and Hunk had brought the nesting materials from both Keith’s hospital room and their own apartment in the Castle. Lance’s biorhythm readings were calmer than the medics had seen, and they stopped bothering him and his mate.

It wasn’t until the end of the day when Keith finally spoke for the first time. “I thought I’d lost you.”

“For a while, so did I,” Lance admitted, “But you got me out in time. You saved me, mi amor. We’re ok.”

Curled up in their temporary nest, wrapped in his Alpha’s arms, long, elegant fingers carding through his hair, Keith was able to sleep peacefully for the first time since the start of the mission.

~*~*~*~

Links to the rest of the series:

1 | 2 | 3* | 4 | 5* | 6* | 7 | 8 | 9* | 10 | 11 | 12* | 13 | 14 | 15* | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19* | 20* | 21* | 22*

[sayonarasanity]

Reverberation

Chapter V

link to AO3

Chapter 1 - 2 - 3 - 4

notes: the song that will be mentioned in this chapter is She's a Rainbow by Lola Marsh and also here is the Spotify link. I highly recommend you to listen to it especially while reading that part. it's truly an incredible song

The first year of high school passed by in the blink of an eye. Between the adjustment of classes, advanced math, and literature, teachers of idiosyncratic character treats and a variety of teens in the class he didn’t even understand the period between September and June. If he was being honest there wasn’t much noteworthy difference between middle school and high school except for the lessons and maybe some physical changes among his peers as well as himself. Save for the height part. Apparently, he wasn’t gifted like that giant Mike or the very sophisticated Erwin Smith.

There was nothing much to do during the summer break. He worked alongside his uncle in the market to at least gain some money and not spend his whole time lying on his bed, sweaty and gasping for a breath while a single leaf on a tree begged for a tiny breeze to make it wiggle. He read some books, watched some TV shows, played soccer with the other boys in class; Mike, Erwin, Oluo, Guther, Eld and even Moblit when or if they were around. Went to the beach with the same squad in addition to girls like Petra, Nifa, Nanaba and Hanji.

Most of his time was spent with Hanji, of course. On the roof, in the attic, in each other’s rooms, sometimes at the library—because the heat didn’t stop Hanji from being a complete nerd—and sometimes she helped him in the market while stuffing his mind with countless  mind-blowing  topics.

And so came the second year of high school.

And it took Hanji only two weeks to be late for the first class in the morning.

“I can’t believe you actually slept in,” Levi told her after she came inside the class during the break, gasping, her face flushed red possibly from running, hair dishevelled and absolutely not  combed,  and sat down on her desk in front of him.

She was trying to adjust her breaths as she turned over to face him. The dispersed, brown strands were covering her face, some of them had stuck on her reddened cheek and forehead. After the not so successful haircut, Levi had given her, she had also gotten bangs. Courtesy of her mother. “I was reading a book last night.”

“And?” He raised a brow.

She pushed the glasses up, and leaned in closer, putting an elbow on top of his desk. “I couldn’t sleep.”

“What kind of book could possibly make you stay awake all night?”

“It’s called The Blind Owl.” She shivered as if a chill had gone through her body. “It was the most disturbing thing I’ve ever read. And the thing is I couldn’t stop reading it because it was also ridiculously intriguing,” she sighed and rubbed her eyes under her glasses. “It cost me my sleep though.”

“That bad, huh?” Levi asked, but it was obvious from the dark circles under her eyes.

“I mean, it wasn’t that bad actually. It was masterfully written for sure. It was just—”

“Disturbing.”

“Yes. There is no other word to explain it.” She ran a hand through her dispersed hair, but her fingers got stuck between the knots. Then she looked at her wrist and groaned frustrated. “I forgot my hair tie.”

One of the things the almost six years of friendship with Hanji had thought him was to collect the items she had a habit of forgetting, mostly in his room. He had a drawer full of her lost, black hair ties. He kept a few on his pencil case or sometimes, like today, he carried one of them on his wrist. “Here,” he said extending it to her.

“What would do without you?” she whined as she took the tie from him.

“You wouldn’t survive a day,” Levi pointed out. It wasn’t even half-joke.

“Agreed,” she nodded. She had finished tying up her hair. Now her face was more on display, the flush on her cheeks was nearly gone. Levi realized that her nape was not covered with the too-short strands that couldn’t make it into her sloppy, little ponytail.

His hand moved instinctively, naturally even. “Your hair has grown long again,” he told her with a frown. And when his fingers touched her bare nape, she winced quite clearly for his frown to get deeper. He retreated his hand upon her reaction.

Her hand held the place he had barely touched seconds ago and when she noticed his expression she laughed. “God, your fingers are cold.”

Levi folded his hand as a fist, pressing his fingertips on his palm to see if his fingers were indeed cold as she had said. His body temperature was low, it was no news to him but at the moment his fingertips was not that cold for her to give such a reaction. Maybe because she had run here it was her body which was unnaturally hot, he reasoned, not really satisfied but he would accept it for the time being.

“Do you want me to cut it?”

“No,” she objected, avoiding his stare. “I’ll use it like this for a while.”

Her hand went on rubbing her neck, it seemed like an almost unintentional, absent-minded motion at this point.

“I made some research,” Hanji said when the silence got a little awkward for their standards. She then looked through her bag with both hands and slammed a wrinkled piece of paper on his desk.

“What’s this?” He examined her inelaborate handwriting but couldn’t understand the overall concept of what was written. Meanwhile, Hanji brought a pen over the page and underlined two words that were written in capital letters.

ROSE and SINA.

“These two are the best universities of the country,” she started to explain. “Both in terms of education and in terms of different opportunities for students. Student clubs are very much active also the campuses are huge.”

Levi had heard of the universities of course. They were named after the cities they were located in. Sina was almost three hours away from their town and Rose was even further in the opposite direction. But they had to leave the town at some point if they wanted to receive a good education. As Hanji had told the two of them were probably their best options and if they manage to keep their grades high enough there was a chance for both of them to make it into the same university. But, which one?

“But?”

“But” she carried the pen over the word Sina and drew a circle around it. “Since Sina is a technical university, I think it is a far better option for us considering the departments we want to study.”

Levi hummed thoughtfully. She did have a point.

“Also,” she continued, eyes glittering. “Great professors like Keith Shadis, Theo Magath and Darius Zackly are teaching there. Imagine the lectures…” she shrieked with excitement and wiggled in her seat. “It’s gonna be so fun!”

Levi shook his head at her quite early thrill and snatched the pencil out of her hand. He drew an arrow to the word Sina and wrote elegantly above: GOAL. “Sina it is then.”

Hanji took the pencil back and while nodding she scratched the word he had just written and instead, bringing the pencil a little to the crosswise she wrote: DREAM.

She looked at him then as if to confirm, with a bright smile on her lips and eyes full of the glitter of the dream she held so close to her heart. It was contagious. Levi felt his lips curling up, and maybe a tiny bit of that lustre in her eyes had reached out to his own. And he thought that maybe it wasn’t that hard after all.

How naïve, a sly, foreign voice whispered in the back of his mind. Little boy, how naïve.

-

“So, what’s going on between you two?”

Hanji lifted her eyebrows upon Nifa’s question and moved her stare to whom the question was directed. Nanaba gulped her bite with seemingly a little more force than necessary and blinked innocently at Nifa. “What do you mean?”

“You know what I mean,” Nifa wiggled her brows, smirking mischievously at their suffering friend. “You and Mike.”

Petra hid a chuckle behind her hand as Hanji bit her cheek inside to stop her smile from shaping so obviously. They were sitting in the backyard of the school on an arbour for lunch. There was still for about half an hour until their next class and from the looks of it, Nifa had decided to use it for some gossip.

“Nothing,” Nanaba answered nonchalantly then she brought the straw of her peach juice to her mouth and took a very long sip. Hanji didn’t miss the faint blush on her cheekbones. “We’re friends.”

“You’re a little too close for being friends, don’t you think?” Nifa asked with a sweet voice, dropping her chin on top of her intertwined fingers, smiling.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about?” Nanaba brushed her off, taking another bite from her sandwich.

“Stop tormenting her, Nifa,” Hanji interrupted just as Nifa was about to say something else. “She can tell us when she feels like it.” Hanji then smirked at a very pissed Nanaba, who was glaring at her so hard Hanji thought she could catch flames just by responding to her stare.

Suddenly, someone dropped something in front of her with a loud “pat” and Hanji looked down, startled, to a packet of chocolate milk, then looked up to a frowning Levi.

“Did you eat?”

“Yep!” Hanji rested her chin on her palm and smiled at him. “Did you?”

He nodded silently and gestured at the milk standing on the wooden table. “You’re gonna pay me back for that later.”

“Stingy,” she murmured as he turned his back to her. Hanji saw the other boys gathered up around a bench a little away from where she and the girls sat. And before Levi went too far away, she shouted behind him, “When shall we meet again?”

He glanced at her above his shoulder. “After school,” he said, flatly.

“Come on, Levi!” She lifted her chin from her palm, disappointed. “You should’ve said “when the hurly-burly is done”, I thought you were better than that!”

He turned his whole body to her this time, walking backwards. A smirk played on one corner of his lips, midday sun caught his eyes, and her heart skipped a beat. “And you should’ve asked, “in thunder, lightning or in rain?” I thought you were better than  that , genius.”

Take him and cut him out in the little stars.

Levi was beautiful. Hanji recalled the day she had first realized it, the faint yellow leaves and the crackling sound of fire. The realization had hit hard, and she couldn’t have understood the reason why right away. It was startling that was for sure but after some thorough and logical consideration, she had decided that it was all about being a teenager.

It was that simple. Thinking a boy was beautiful was natural. Besides, it wasn’t just Levi. Erwin, for instance, was attractive. With a sharp chin, bright, blue eyes and that shiny yellow hair that always looked so soft like cotton. He wasn’t necessarily beautiful though but attractive still, handsome even.

And he will make the face of Heaven so fine.

Levi turned his back to her again and Hanji snorted, opening the straw of her chocolate milk. “He got me bad.”

When she put the straw between her lips for a long sip, she realized the silence that has settled on the table and when she took a glance above her glasses, she saw the three other girls looking at her.

“What?” she asked after gulping.

“What’s with you two?”

“Huh?”

It was Nifa again and this time the question was directed at her. “You and Levi?”

Hanji blinked, trying to reason her question. “What about us?”

“You seem close,” Petra added instead of Nifa. Her hazel eyes curious as she observed Hanji. “Like real close.”

Hanji frowned and pushed her glasses back to their proper place. “We are best friends.” They seriously hadn’t understood it for a year?

“I bet everyone thinks you’re dating,” Nifa said laughing.

Oh? “That’s ridiculous,” Hanji said, shaking her head. “Why would I date my best friend?”

Nifa shrugged, and Petra looked thoughtful. “How long have you been friends?”

Hanji didn’t know why but she felt her stomach curl. “Since we were eleven.”

Petra hummed and the conversation seemed to be over like that. Hanji chewed the plastic stick thoughtfully and with distress, she couldn’t find the reason why. The curl stayed solid in her stomach, sharp and insistent. Absently she noticed that Petra was staring somewhere with a strange expression in her eyes and when Hanji followed her stare, she saw Levi standing in front of the bench the other boys were sitting. Mike who was standing next to him had wrapped an arm around his shoulders, and he looked content, his features relaxed, his black hair looked smooth touching his forehead.

That all the world will be in love with the night.

Goddamn Juliet, she thought bitterly, frowning she took her eyes away from him. Goddamn Shakespeare.

*

“What did you want to talk to me about?”

It was Wednesday afternoon on a nice autumn day. Near them was a tree slowly getting peeled off its leaves, and the clouds were reflecting the orange light the sun created. It was also reflecting on her ginger hair, making it shine almost yellow.

“I, uh…” Petra cleared her throat, squeezed her hair behind her ear as the blush that had appeared on her cheeks gradually became more visible. “This is harder than I expected.”

Levi raised his brows. He had been wondering what Petra wanted to talk to him ever since she asked him if they could meet after school in the backyard this morning. He had found it a little awkward because it had felt like she wanted to talk to him in private and he couldn’t have thought of any reason why she would wish for that.

“You look nervous,” he told her.

“Well, of course, I am,” Petra laughed, not a cheerful one. “I am trying to…”

She let out a sharp breath as if she was angry at herself and she wasn’t looking at him too. Her eyes were scanning their feet, her fingers were fidgeting, brows furrowed.

And Levi was quietly getting an idea about why she wanted to talk to him.

“Just tell me,” He tried to encourage her, feeling his own heartbeat getting faster abruptly.  

Finally, she looked up at him, her cheeks painted crimson and she took a long, deep breath before she said, “Would you like to go to the cinema with me?”

“Oh,” he said.

Not the kind of reaction he should’ve given apparently. Petra bit her lower lip anxiously at first, searching his eyes. He must be pretty shocked for she looked a little discouraged upon his reaction. But within seconds she gathered herself up, her shoulders held high.

“I… liked you since the seventh grade,” she said, the blush spread from her cheeks to her neck, but she continued to be resolute without looking anywhere else than him. “And I thought that there is nothing wrong with asking a boy out if that boy doesn’t seem to be doing it anytime close.”

Levi felt his own cheeks heating up. Admittedly, he had never realized Petra had such feelings for him. “Sorry.”

Petra laughed, somewhat forcefully. “It’s okay,” she gulped, and a weak smile vibrated on her lips. “Just don’t be harsh if you’re gonna say no.”

Levi considered her offer quietly. Petra had always been a good friend and she was a nice person too. Kind, tidy and even funny. She loved painting and drawing and was pretty gifted at them as well. And she smelled fresh, Levi guessed it was because of the softener she used on her clothes, her hair was soft, and her eyes were pretty.

“When do you want to go?”

Said pretty eyes glittered as she beamed at him. For a second, in the back of his mind, he saw a very similar image belonging to another girl with auburn hair and hazel-brown eyes who had a smile that reminded him of the rainbow after rain and sun.

“What about this Friday after school?” Petra asked, excitedly.

“Sure,” Levi responded, trying to smile and ignore the weird feeling in his stomach.

*

When he stepped into the roof, the night was chilly, the sky was full of transparent, quietly moving clouds, the stars were shining behind them, the Wanning Gibbous was hanging low on the horizon, and Hanji was standing on the edge of the roof, her head laid backwards.

Levi didn’t even know if he breathed, his heart jumped to his throat as he threw his schoolbag to the ground and walked closer to her from behind cautiously. “Hanji, what the fuck are you doing?”

“Watching the sky,” she replied, smiling.

Levi felt a muscle move on his jaw; his heart was beating so loud it almost hurt his ears. He focused on adjusting his breaths. In and out. “Don’t be ridiculous. Get back down.”

Hanji shrugged and Levi nearly had a heart attack right then and there. He felt his eyes widen, and his breath hitched. “I feel closer to the clouds like this.”

“Hanji,” he took slow, careful steps towards her. The night breeze was toying with her dispersed hair, her face was tranquil, her eyes never left the sight of the clouds. The smile that was drawn on her lips was unmoving like it was craved there by the hands of a masterful sculptor. And he watched her, his heart still beating fast and loud, his breaths irregular, and his eyes wide, and he thought about—

Stars

how free she looked at that moment like she belonged to the sky, the stars and the moon. As if they shone for her only.

hide your fires.  

Brown hair and brown eyes but Hanji was luminous. She kept the colours hidden, had a brush and a palette ready in her hand. The murky night did nothing but to contrast the light, she had a way with the world which made her stood out among the dullest of sounds and faces. Even on top of a derelict building, she was—

Let not light see—

the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

He grabbed her wrist, inhaling hard and thick then he drew her back with a quick move of his arm. Her body turned and crashed against him, and he stumbled backwards a few steps, but he kept his balance, wrapping his arms around her waist securely, without any intention of letting go. He vaguely heard the surprised shriek Hanji made upon his unexpected move. And he half-expected her to push him back, to laugh it off and to say that he was being dramatic again. That nothing was going to happen anyway, it wasn’t like she was going to jump.

Yet instead, her arms circled his neck as she rested her cheek on his head and at that very moment Levi realized that he had never thought of losing her, of what would happen if she were to leave his life. Just like he had never imagined a day without the sun rising. The thought was uninvited and unwelcomed, and it cropped a fear in his heart so profound, he drew a shivering breath in before he buried his face on her neck. Then he pushed that thought deep down to the dungeon in his head never to see daylight again.

“I’m okay, you know,” Hanji spoke after seconds.

“Stupid,” he said, holding her tighter. “Stupid four-eyes.”

“Mm,” she muttered, amused. Then she started to move left and right making him follow her movements as if they were dancing. “I’m going to let all the world know that Levi Ackerman cares for me.”

Levi placed his forehead on her shoulder, pressing hard. “Someone needs to care for your sorry ass, or you’ll drop it down a goddamn building.”

She laughed, and it felt so good to hear it he immediately craved the sound soon as it faded away. Hanji stopped moving afterwards, then put her hands on his shoulder to push him slightly back. He withdrew reluctantly but kept his hands on either side of her waist not ready to let go just yet.

Her eyes were somewhat misty as she watched him, as the sharp peak of a mountain lost behind a grey fog. Levi frowned at her, searching for a sturdy branch to hold and to obtain some kind of a clue about what she was thinking. He came back empty-handed, and Hanji snapped out of it soon after, smiling at him brightly and warm. Her hair was all over her face, her glasses were askew, and he brought a hand up to fix them.

Then he flicked her forehead instead.

“Ouch!” She exclaimed, touching the slightly damaged skin.

“That was for almost giving me a heart attack,” Levi said nonchalantly and walked past her to grab his schoolbag. Then he sat down, bag between his legs as he searched for the snacks he bought after school.

“Geez, I’m sorry,” Hanji muttered as she placed herself next to him. “But you were just being dramatic. I wasn’t going to jump anyway.”

*

So, here was the thing, he needed to tell Hanji.

But he didn’t know how. Through all those years they had been friends, there had never been a secret among them. He knew everything about her. From the fact that she had fed a frog in her room when she was only seven without telling neither of her parents and how she accidentally killed the poor animal by forgetting to feed it properly. And to the very first crush, she secretly had on a boy who didn’t even know who she was when she was ten. Each and every detail in between had been craved in his head, everything about her was a book he had learnt by heart, and he knew that for her it was the same.

He didn’t understand why he was so unwilling now about telling her about Petra. Frankly, he was going to tell her yesterday but when he saw her standing on the edge of the goddamn roof, he had forgotten all about it in a second. Thursday, which was today, he couldn’t have found a chance to talk to her alone and tomorrow was Friday. And he had no idea what the hell he was supposed to do.

Levi traced the shadows on the ceiling with his eyes, lying on his bed. It was near eleven pm but he didn’t have any sleep. Should he call Hanji? But no. It wasn’t something he could tell on the phone. It would be absurd and out of nowhere—

His phone started to vibrate on the bedside table.

He jumped a little, surprised at hearing a sound other than the voices in his head then stared at the phone for a while until he decided that it was going to ring till he opened it. And so, he did.

“I thought you had fallen asleep,” Hanji spoke before him as he lied back down, eyes fixed on the ceiling.

“I was trying to,” he lied.

“Oh, sorry,” she apologized without sounding a bit sincere. “But this is more important than your sleep so…”

He raised a brow. “What did you learn again?”

“A lot of things. But that is not the reason why I called.” Levi heard some clatter he guessed it was the pressing of the computer keys. “I found a new song.”

He exhaled, wearily. “Seriously?”

“Wait before you judge,” she said. “Do you remember the time when you said, this is going to sound weird but, I was a rainbow?”

“No.”

“I hate you,” she said, darkly. “It was our first time in the attic. I had told you about –”

“I know, Hanji.” He rolled his eyes. “Of course, I remember.”

She grunted and said some things he couldn’t quite pick clearly under her breath. “You don’t really deserve this but since I’m a nice person I’ll let you listen to it.”

He snorted, lips curling on the corners, and he waited for the song to start. And not long after, he heard the first notes, then a soft voice of a woman followed. He also heard Hanji accompanying quietly behind, murmuring the lyrics alongside. Then he closed his eyes to focus on the song properly.

Dearest, I'm broken

My body is unspoken

How could I be loved?

Wake up in the morning

Feeling uncertain

Like a burning old scar

For I remember

The joy I’ve had as a child

Various colours I’m hiding inside

She’s a rainbow

And I am

A difficult man

It was as if the song, the lyrics, the notes, the singer’s voice were each had little hooks, they captured his soul relentlessly. He felt captive, unable to move. The song made him feel way too many things, with an intensity that nearly choke him as he lied there. His throat felt tight, even after the song ended, notes faded, and all he could hear was Hanji’s regular breaths a complete opposite of how his heart pounded at the moment.

“So?” She asked when he was unable to speak. “What do you think?”

Levi cleared his throat, he needed to talk dammit. “It was nice.”

“Just nice?” She didn’t sound pleased at his response. “But you have to listen to it every day Levi so that you wouldn’t forget me.”

“Forget you?” Was she kidding?

“We don’t know where life would take us,” Hanji told him, her voice calm now. “It’s the reality of the world. I’m just guarantying myself.”

Oh, so she didn’t know? That no matter where life carried him, no matter how high and wild the waves would be it would change nothing. The sun would rise from the west, and all the world would crumble, melt and disappear. But he wouldn’t forget her.

“What if you forget me?” Levi redirected the question to her, wondering her answer.

“I wouldn’t,” she said, not hesitating.

“How do you know?”

“If I’m a rainbow then that would make you the sky, remember?” Some distinct shuffling came to his ears, and he imagined her lying on her side, the phone still on speaker resting on top of her pillow. “Whenever I look up at the sky, I will think about you.”

“Sappy,” he whispered, ignoring the aftershock her words caused.

She chuckled in response and yawned loudly. “Only for you, clean-freak.”

*

Friday after the last class ended Hanji gathered up her things quickly. It had been an incredibly long and tiring week. She couldn’t wait to spend some time with Levi on the roof, just talking about things that didn’t matter, things that were easy to speak of because they were still young and had years ahead to take them seriously.

She waited for Levi outside, leaning against the school building as he went to the bathroom. She busied herself with observing the exhausted students leaving the school borders, chattering between themselves. It was getting chilly and the black denim jacket she was wearing didn’t do a good job at protecting her. She pulled the sleeves of her sweater to her palms to at least cover her hands. She spotted Petra a few inches away from where she was standing. She was walking back and forth, fiddling with a piece of paper she held in her hands. Hanji found it a little strange but shrugged, deciding it wasn’t her business.

Finally, among the rain of students that walked through the school gate, Levi appeared. His face and some parts of his hair damp, indicating that he had just washed his face.

“Feeling refreshed enough?” Hanji asked, smirking.

“Yeah,” Levi murmured, and he looked around briefly.

“Come on,” Hanji pushed herself up from the wall. “Let’s go. We better grab something to eat on the way. I’m starving.”

She had taken only a few steps when she heard Levi calling out to her quietly. “Hanji.”

“Mm?”

He appeared to be uneasy as he looked at her, brows knitted, and lips pressed. Curiosity rose within her swiftly as she expected the words he was about to say.

“I can’t come to the roof with you today.”

Of all the things she thought about that was the least, she had expected to hear. Her stomach started to burn again, and she imagined a cauldron inside. Burning so fiercely and it never promised anything good. “Why?” Hanji asked, sounding just as surprised as she possibly looked.

Levi’s eyes moved to somewhere above her shoulder. She wanted to trace his stare but was too busy observing his expression, a little anxious, tense and what? Embarrassed? But why?

“Levi?”

“I… am going to the cinema,” he blurted eventually, his eyes finding her again. “With Petra.”

Cinema… with Petra?

“As a date?” She sounded bewildered again as if she couldn’t believe her ears. It wasn’t something to be that surprised about considering their age, hormones and everything. But it was Levi. Levi… It had always been the two of them, now imagining him spending time alone with someone else—she hadn’t prepared herself for that.

“I guess,” Levi rubbed his neck. Oh, he was shy about it too? Was he excited, was he looking forward to it? Was he going to hold her hand as he held hers? Did he even  like  her? When had this thing happened anyway?

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

He seemed guilty, and he should be too. They were best friends for a reason. If she wasn’t going to be the first one to know about his first  date, what was the point to it?

“It happened just this Wednesday. I couldn’t find a proper time—”

“This Wednesday?” She tried not to reflect her disappointment in her voice. “It was two days ago, mind you. You had plenty of time.”

“Hanji—”

“Did you ask her out?” Hanji went on, not giving him any chance to speak. “How long have you liked her?”

“It’s not—” He frowned, his jaw tightened, and a blaze came to life in his eyes. “She asked me.”

“Oh? How brave!” She felt like laughing and somewhere deep inside she knew that she was exaggerating, that she should be happy for him instead. Yet the disappointment was much heavier, and it stood out so blatantly, so arrogantly that it didn’t give her any time to think reasonably.  

“Hanji, don’t.” He stepped forward but she withdrew in an instant.

“Have a nice date,” she said, and she failed at hiding the sarcasm behind. And she thought she saw a flickering of hurt in his eyes but didn’t stay long enough to acknowledge it. With a final look she gave to a confused Petra, she walked out of school. And the cauldron bubbled, bubbled and it burned, and it hurt. Then Hanji wished it would turn the wildflower to ashes to its roots so that it wouldn’t spring again. Wishful thinking it was because the wildflower was already the reason why the flames come alive in the first place.

*

Hanji didn’t quite remember when or how but she was sitting on the swing on the park near Levi’s house, the park they had buried the dead bird all those years ago. Strange how the years passed. She felt old for some reason despite the fact that she was only sixteen and life hadn’t even started for her yet. But she yearned for that little girl now, playing snowball fight with a boy who drank a little too much tea and swore a little too much for their age. Then she cursed at herself for being so frail, for letting her emotions draw the road she would walk.

The streetlamp near the park had a weak light. It trembled from time to time, squeaking as if it was at death’s door. She pondered it was a good metaphor as to how she felt now. Exaggerating? Maybe. But Levi had become such a constant in her life, it felt like the time Jack had crashed her glasses. She remembered how blurry everything seemed and how dizzy she had felt.

“Hanji?”

She blinked and following the voice she lifted her eyes up from the ground. It was Erwin, standing in front of her, with a curious expression painted on his face. What was he doing here?

“Are you okay?”

“Huh?” Hanji shook her head, realizing that she had been blinking at Erwin absently. Then nodded, voicing a half-hearted chuckle. “Yeah, I’m fine. What are you doing here?”

He sat down on the swing next to her, dropping his school bag on the ground. It was a funny sight. A boy of Erwin’s age and height sitting on a child swing. His legs were much too long for that, but he used them to move back and forth slowly.

“I was just passing by,” he said, shrugging. “What are you doing here alone? Where’s Levi?”

She didn’t need to be reminded of the fact that whenever someone saw one of them alone, they immediately wondered where the other was.  I am acting like a child.  Then she started to move back and forth herself, holding the chains on either side. “He is on a date,” she informed Erwin. “With Petra.”

Then the movements of her legs fastened to the point where she had to curl them so that they wouldn’t slow her down. She used her body against the wind, it ruffled her hair, and her hair blocked her vision. And she thought about Levi who was with Petra and Petra who was kind and pretty. Petra who had shiny hair which was always combed and tidy. Petra who was funny and nice and—

“Hanji!”

Ah, her vision was blurry. Had she dropped her glasses again?

“Hey, slow down!”

She couldn’t slow down but someone, Erwin, she remembered, made her. He was holding the sides of the swing, kneeling down in front of her, he looked into her eyes. Hanji noticed his eyes were a different kind of blue not so fierce like the winter ocean, but kind and worried at the moment. Yellow, thick eyebrows knitted, “Are you okay?” Erwin asked.

It was the second time he had asked the same question and it confused her a bit. Did she look that bad? “Yeah,” she confirmed. Her voice came out cracked.

Then Erwin reached out with his hand. Hanji waited silently as he wiped her cheek with his thumb and under her chin with his knuckles. His hand shone under the shrieking light of the streetlamp when he withdrew it, with tears, she realized with a startle. She lifted her hand then, her eyes wide and touched her damp cheek.

“I can walk you home if you’d like,” Erwin offered with a voice so gentle Hanji thought she hated it. Hated because she didn’t want pity when she was the one that had brought this upon herself.

She blinked at her wet fingers, her sight getting blurry again and used her other hand to adjust her glasses.  She could walk herself home, and she opened her mouth to say that much to Erwin. But words betrayed her half-way and what came out was, “I’d appreciate that,” instead, as she accepted, silently. “Thank you.”

[blind-rats]

For the fans, it’s never about the “happy endings”. People misunderstood that it seems to get a good storyline, either it has to be happy or dark. It’s not that simple. It’s not Happy Ending vs Dark Ending. It’s about good storytelling and characterization.

For years, fans cared more about the characters. When a writer only focused on the plot, and not the character, then they would usually sacrifice the progression, the development, the investment, the connection, and the fans who actually watched the show FOR the characters since the beginning. Good storytelling is when it elevates the character (good or bad) into something layered.

Season 1: 

Aaron was arrested for Lilly’s murder was a good thing; something that should be done. The baddie finally was captured, even got hit by a truck. 

Logan wanted to jump off the bridge was a cliffhanger; something that would keep the fans tuned in for the next season. 

Lianne took the money was IN character; she wasn’t a good mother and Veronica finally admitted that. For a whole season, V thought that by solving Lilly’s murder, her mom would return, but in the end, it didn’t matter. V accepted that. It sucks, but it was progress for Veronica that she finally let her go, although she lost the money. There was balance for these plots and these characters, that is why season 1 was the best.

Season 2: 

Keith missed the flight wasn’t about a happy ending -- it was a set up for the next season because he received a mysterious assignment from Kendall. Again, it kept the fans wanting more.

Season 3: 

Logan beat up Gory was a set up for the next season. Like I mentioned before, if the show wasn’t canceled, it would give Logan a darker path or a lighter path in his life. It was supposed to make the fans wanting more; what would happen to Logan? What would happen to him and Veronica? There was a lot of speculation at the time, but it wasn’t supposed to be the ending.

Keith lost the election, according to RT himself, because he helped Veronica. Which was IN character. He helped Veronica, and it ignited another rivalry between him and Jake Kane again. It was supposed to be another set up for the next season, and it wasn’t supposed to be the ending. 

The Movie:

There are so many retcons in this movie that fans noticed and many expressed their displeasure because the storytelling of the movie was a bit weak, BUT they are still IN characters. Yes, there are some changes, obviously you can’t have the same characters from a decade ago. Logan was matured, Wallace was matured, Mac was matured, Weevil was matured, even Piz was matured. 

Veronica was trying to find herself and decide what kind of person she wanted to be. At the end of the movie, she decided that she wanted to help people. And that is why many fans liked the movie because the character progressed into the next stage. The character didn’t stay stasis.

The movie had so many flaws, especially with cheesy dialogues, unimportant cameos, and frankly not so good plots. But when fans have waited for so long for the conclusion of the series, to have characters finally get their deserved/bittersweet endings, is a good thing.

The Books (The Thousand Dollar Tan Line and Mr. Kiss & Tell):

Maybe because the books were (co)written by Jennifer Graham, a woman, a fan, she knew about the characterization of the characters. Fans immediately noticed the differences between her writing and Rob’s writing; which parts were hers, which parts were RT’s. 

Nobody cared nor remember about the professor and the murderer/rapist, but everyone mostly remembered about Haley, Lianne, Aurora, Hunter, Petra, Jade, Norris, Grace, and even The Gutiérrez cousins.

Notice that all of the memorable characters in the books were absent from season 4 because RT didn’t write them in the books and he felt that he didn’t need to explain their absence.

Logan and Weevil had a good relationship, and they both were friendly with each other. That was progress and should be allowed to continue.

Logan and Veronica had stability and a good relationship even when there were some problems. Even when Leo (who was inserted by RT) was there. But it was pretty much good characterization for both of the characters. Something that was missing in season 4.

Season 4:

To those who said that the whole season was great except for the ending, didn’t pay any attention. From the very beginning, fans were being introduced to a lot of new characters that fans didn’t know nor care like it was some sort a new show. They have their own storylines, their own plots, even their own endings. It would be fine if this was a brand new show, but it wasn’t. It was a continuation of the previous installment. The new characters from the books were much more nuanced compare to the new characters in season 4.

The show focused more on the plots instead of the characterizations. They focused more on the special guest stars instead of the regular cast.

The characterization of Veronica was WAY OFF; so different and seems to be regressed to her former self when she was 17 years old. She was rude to everyone including Logan and Wallace. She didn’t know what was going on with Keith. She was nonchalant about filming others having sex. She was using drugs. She was drinking and shooting a gun. She was mocking Wallace and Logan for having stability. She was more interested in having a fling with Leo but she refused to break up with Logan.

Fans would accept Veronica’s regression if there was something happened to her. Why she behave like that? What was the reason? She was having a life she chosen from the movie and the books, and yet she wasn’t happy. Because of what? What kind of trauma that made her regressed? No reason at all? Because normal life is not something that a detective should have? And that’s when the characterization was down the drain. When a character doesn’t have a motivation to do what’s right or what’s wrong, their behavior is considered to be OOC. 

Matty, a new character, a white rich sociopath girl, wasn’t Veronica, and yet the fans were expected to treat and view her like she was Veronica. 

Marcia, the new chief of police was a wasted character. She wasn’t a foil for Veronica, wasn’t an enemy of anybody, and she spent her time in the precinct only.

The assassins from the Mexican cartel had too many plots and not enough characterization, and frankly, the fans didn’t care about them, especially when the writers sacrificed Wallace and Mac.

The death of Logan wasn’t just the only thing that was considered worse, but the fact that they immediately didn’t see the aftermath. They never showed the emotional impact and didn’t even give the characters and the fans to mourn the character. RT tends to leapfrog a plot, even in iZombie, and put exposition instead. 

The death of Logan was wasted, done by the most insignificant villain in the history of the show that didn’t even have a proper characterization and development. But the show promoted him like he was one of the best things ever happened.

Logan’s death wasn’t caused by a heroic moment or something dramatic. It was last minute and immediately swept under the carpet.

Veronica spent her last monologue talking about exposition. it was an ending. It wasn’t something that fans wanted to tune in, unlike the previous seasons, movie, and books.

So the whole notion that every season ended in a dark ending is partly untrue. Plot-wise, it should served their characters. It should elevated them into something better or something darker, but it was interesting nonetheless. Season 4 didn’t have that at all. All the characters were gone, finished. Veronica rode off to the sunset without any kind of satisfying ending, good or bad. Bad, mostly.

This is why Breaking Bad/Better Call Saul and Cobra Kai are praised because of the writings and characterization. We see the progression of the characters of Jimmy to Saul, who is not a good person, but still layered. We see the development of Johnny Lawrence; from a bully to an anti-hero. Or Hawk from a nerd into a bully himself. IT'S THE CHARACTERIZATION AND DEVELOPMENT accompanied by good storytelling. It’s not (just) about happy/sad ending.

It’s also not just about killing off the main character. There’s a reason why fans are still angry with the ending of How I Met Your Mother or LOST. So many people are pissed with the ending of Dexter and Game of Thrones. Don’t forget about The 100, Gilmore Girls, and Arrow. Not because of the dark endings of those shows, or the killing off the main characters. It was because they wasted so many years with the characterization and development just to get subverted endings that the writers seem to pat themselves on the back, ignoring any fans who had been there for the start.

And RT’s betrayal to the fans isn’t just about killing off the main character. It was the way he did it. He was using the fans to revive the show, using the fans’ money to revive it, knowing that he would kill off a popular character, knowing that he would piss loyal fans and the fandom, who had been very supportive with his works and projects, and yet still done it, just because he despised a character he created for so long. Even BBC News knew this trend and called him out. It was the way he exploited the fans that were considered to be a betrayal.

[sasa-gay-yo]

Just Us   (Chapter 1: His Eyes)

Sometime before The Fall of Wall Maria

The hum of customers seemed louder that day. Normally four or five regulars were sitting in the corner, drinking coffee and sharing baguettes, but today, it seemed most of the tables were filled. Newspapers were being passed back and forth between people and if I cared much about the news, I might have taken myself away from kneading bread to glance at the pages. Just by hearing the customers, I filled myself in on the town gossip without having to be confronted by the old ladies trying to make me marry their sons. 

“I can’t get married right now, Miss. Schmidt. There’s too much to do with the shop that I have no time to give my attention to anyone else.” Those excuses and a smile seemed to hold them off for a few days. 

“Eva! Can we get a refill of coffee here?” I looked up to the three Garrison soldiers who were hiding away from their morning watch duties. At least they weren’t drinking whiskey. Nodding, I put the dough in the oven to prove and wiped my hands. Now, I would have to talk to some people. If it made them want to come to the café more, I guess I would sacrifice a little of my sanity. 

“Here you go,” I held up my hand as they tried to slide a few more coins my way, “You already have had three, this one is on the house.” The Captain looked up and smiled at me before putting them back in his pocket. The, too, had a newspaper laid out in the center of the table. 

“Have you heard about the Survey Corps recently, Eva?” I shook my head and he held up the paper. 

“Apparently they’ve gained some recruits worth our tax dollars! They didn’t lose half of their people on the last expedition. It’s front-page news for some reason.” One of the subordinates pointed at the portrait on the front page of what I assumed to be the new commander of the Scouts. Last week's news was the retirement of Keith Shadis and the promotion of various Corps peoples. Perhaps with the promotion also came the recent success. 

“I think anyone who goes out to fight titans on our behalf is worth my tax dollars. If I recall, soldiers only pay a fraction of our taxes. In fact, I’m paying for you to sit here in my café and drink away my coffee supply. It’s hard on me to travel to the capital markets every month.” I raised an eyebrow at them and it seems the pleasant conversation they wanted to have had ended, especially with the other customers listening in. They made it a point to stand up, leave the coins on the table, and walk out of the café. 

“Finally doing their job.” I picked up the untouched pitcher of coffee and wiped down the table. They didn’t even have the decency to put their cups in the dish bin. I rolled my eyes and cleaned up after them, going back to kneading more bread dough and warming up their coffee for the next customer. 

Maybe the success of the Scouts will make the Garrison and MPs care about the people inside the walls. You can only be self-serving for a little bit before it comes to bite you in the ass.

“Delivery!” Again, I’m distracted from my bread making. This is why I should have prepped last night. I wiped off my hands, noticing how dry they’d become, and turned to get what I assumed to be my portion of flour. 

“Hi Jonas, just put it on the table here.” 

“Eva, did you hear the news?” I poured him a cup of juice and handed it to him, nodding. 

“The Survey Corps?” He nodded hard and drank it all in one big gulp. 

“You should’ve seen it when the scouts came through the city a few days ago. I don’t think I’ve ever seen people cheer for them, but this time they did. Did you watch them come by?” I took his cup and put it in the sink before turning back to him. 

“No, I was stuck in here. I did see the tops of some of their heads though, but the crowd around the window was pretty thick.” I decided to lean against the front counter and take a break from baking to talk to Jonas, one of the only people my age who seemed to come around here and stay. If you were young in Trost, you were always working. They would come in and right out of the café, never staying to talk or look out the windows. I only know a few of their names, but all of their drink orders by heart. The only ones who seemed to talk a bit when they came in were, in fact, Scouts who got a few days off. No conversation ever really amounted to anything and I didn’t take time to memorize their orders as they would always stop coming a few weeks after they first arrived. 

“How is Reeve’s doing on orders? I heard that there might be a shortage of meat soon.” He shrugged at me and I signed his papers. 

“I don’t have a clue about that. I just go where they tell me to. I mean, I haven’t been delivering a lot of meat lately. You don’t need it though, do you?” 

“No, I just need flour, coffee, and sometimes tea. I go to the capital for the last two. If anything, I’d just stop being a bakery.” Jonas pouted and pointed to the croissants in the glass case. 

“I’d fight to get those if there was a shortage. You have the best bread in Trost!” I smiled and waved my hand. 

“No, I don’t, Jonas. I kn-” 

“Tea, please.” Jonas jumped and turned around to see the man behind him. His grey eyes bore holes into Jonas who was in his way. I’d seen him before, but it was his first time into the café. 

“C-Captain Levi!” Jonas even bowed to him, slightly shaking. I tilted my head, looking at the man, no taller than me. Why was this shorty making Jonas shake in his shoes? And Captain? He didn’t seem like the type to be in the Garrison. 

When I was done looking at his form, I looked back up to his eyes which seemed annoyed that he was having to wait for his tea. They were a pretty grey but were almost overshadowed by the dark circles under his eyes. I’d seen those type of eyes...tired from death, not from lack of sleep. He was definitely a Scout.

I stood up and wiped my hands again, slightly wincing at their dryness. 

“What type of tea, Cap’n?” He didn’t seem to be amused at my abbreviation of his title and I lost my customer-friendly smile. Guess I didn’t have to play pretend around his negative attitude. 

“Black.” I raised an eyebrow and looked at his form again. Tired, strained, busted, sad even… He needed something less… anxiety-inducing than straight black tea. He needed something soothing. 

“May I make a suggestion?” He looked up again having already put the money for plain black tea on the counter. I didn’t fail to notice how when he looked up, so did everyone else in the café. Was he radiating some form of intimidating energy to everyone in this place? He didn’t look scary, just tired and stressed. I guess the darkness of his features didn’t help his cause. 

“What?” Every answer was short and low. He did have an impressive voice for being short, but it also sounded like he had a scratchy throat. A mental note to add honey. 

“Mint?” He looked at me for a few seconds, probably deciding whether or not I could ruin his tea routine, “No extra cost. You just seem like you don’t need any more caffeine at the moment. Perhaps a few more hours of sleep.” The last sentence was mumbled, but I’m sure he had to hear it. Hopefully, he heard it and took me up on it. 

“Sure.” He waved his hand and walked over to the corner table where the Garrison was sitting, staring out the window. It seemed that he was far away enough for everyone to start gossiping about him. I stared at him for a few more seconds before taking out one of the few teacups I owned. No one wants to drink tea anymore… such old taste. 

“E-Eva? How did you talk to him like that?!” I glanced over at Jonas who was crouched over the counter and whispering to me. 

“What do you mean? Why is everyone so afraid of him? He’s no taller than me, Jonas.” 

“He’s Captain Levi! Humanity’s strongest soldier. It’s said that he’s killed over 100 titans by himself! And, and, and he just joined the Corps this past year. He used to be a…” He leaned in even more and put a hand in front of his mouth like that was going to help block out this secret, “a famous gangster in the underground.” I looked back at him again and met his eyes. He quickly looked away, but I did notice he was still staring at me from his peripheral. It was the way he was sitting that made it possible to spy on me unsuspectingly. 

“He does look a bit mean, but I don’t see danger...I think he just intimidates you and you don’t like it because he’s shorter than you.” Jonas was exasperated at my comment and looked back and forth between the Captain and me. 

“But he’s from the underground! You know how dangerous those people are! Kenny the Ripper and The Sniper… he’s one of them!” I rolled my eyes again and watched the tea as it brewed. 

“You forget I was born in the underground too, Jonas.” It was a low whisper to keep gossip down to a minimum and he shook his head fast, tapping on the counter. 

“But you’re different, Eva. You didn’t live there for very long either and you were adopted by Mister Flynn. I know he’s murdered like so many people.” I held the honey jar up, debating how much I should put in. He didn’t seem like the type of person who would like something overly sweet, but his throat sounded like it needed a bit more honey. 

“So, if I wasn’t adopted and you met me on the streets, would you be treating me like you’re treating him?” He groaned again and tried to grab my hand to get me to understand his point better. I moved my arm so he fell a bit farther on the counter. 

“I’m happy that someone who knows how to kill is now killing titans. You read the newspapers. What if he’s the reason the Scouts are doing better now?” I put the teacup on the tray along with a small bowl of honey. I couldn’t decide. 

Everyone in the café watched as I walked over to his table and put the tea down. 

“Peppermint tea. I don’t know how you like your tea so there’s some honey. You should put it in.” I pointed to the tiny bowl and he looked down at it too, grunting. I guess that was his way of saying thank you. 

Something made it so I didn’t move from standing in front of him. Maybe I was just curious why everyone was afraid to meet his eye or why they thought he was so intimidating. I mean, Jonas was shitting his pants talking about him and here I stood, not feeling anything like that. I was grateful, if anything, for his service in the Corps and just how many titans he’s rumored to have killed.

“Do you have a question?” It was harsh and it woke me out of the trance while looking at him. I had to recover quickly, or it’d be a bit embarrassing to just admit I was staring at him. He really… wasn’t so bad looking either. Just short. 

“I’m waiting for you to put the honey in your tea.” A good recovery with a hard tone behind it. Hopefully, he didn’t see through it. He groaned again, taking one spoonful and making a grand gesture about putting it into the tea and stirring. I smiled when he followed my fake orders, but it was funny. The titan serial killing maniac gangster had done something that I told him. I nodded once before walking away from his table, noticing, again, everyone's eyes. It was easier to face his grey ones than it was to look at all of theirs. Annoying. 

“Jonas, get off my counter! You’re making it dirty!” 

Orders and people kept flowing in as the hour passed by, but as it reached lunchtime, everything slowed down. No one would want pastries until later in the day for an after-work snack and coffee and tea had lost their use as everyone was now knees deep in work. The only people left in my café were three older women gossiping, two men playing chess, and the Captain himself. 

He was still in the same position, staring out the window, and he slowly sipped his tea as if he was savoring it. I noted that as a victory for my tea-making skills and also noticed that he had used up all the honey I had given him. Interesting. He did like his tea sweet. Maybe he is scary and I’m just not good at judging someone’s character.  

All there was left to do was keep the bread and pastries rotating in and out of the oven and tend to the customers who came every fifteen minutes or so. When I was on downtime, I would debate on whether to go talk to him again or just let him be. Maybe me talking to him would make him more tired and a waste of the peppermint tea I gave him. Just a bag of that tea costs a fortune in the capital, but I was now glad for my decision to buy it. 

Maybe he's sitting there, try to get me to notice him and go talk to him. I can feel it when he looks at me while my back is turned. Is that a call to come over? Has my wit and good looks made him interested in me? Or, my last hypothesis, he can’t read me like I can’t read him. He is a Scout, so maybe he’s surveying me as they do. I was definitely trying to study him behind the pastry glass.

Around one, almost four hours after he stepped foot into my café, he stood up and walked the teacup and plate to the counter next to me. The dish tray wasn’t empty, so he either hadn’t seen it, or my second hypothesis was right and he had finally gotten annoyed that I didn’t approach him. 

“I don’t know where this goes.” His voice was still as stiff as ever, but perhaps it sounded a bit less scratchy. Up close again, I got to study his features. He was handsome, but not your average Trost brown-hair-brown-eyes boy. His eyes told stories the longer you looked at them. Stories of titans and death and the underground. I wish I could stare at them for longer, but he lowered his head again, pushing the cup forward. I got to see his side profile from the other side and it was the same. He was perfect and symmetrical. Sharp jaw and nose hide under strands of raven hair. Everything about him was so… not dark, but I guess the right word would be intimidating or... hard. He just seemed to be hard. Nothing would break his shell, not even small talk, but damn, did I want to try. 

“I can take that for you, Captain.” He nodded and stood there as I put the dish in the sink. He was studying me like I had when I delivered the tea. I decided to use this against him. 

“Did you have a question?” He opened his mouth to say something, probably a quick remark, but it didn’t come out. I turned, smiling, looking at his stance. He still had a blank expression, hiding any emotion, but I knew deep down that my question affected him. 

“How much is that?” He pointed to the baguette in the glass display which conveniently already had the price marked. Humanity’s strongest wasn’t very perceptive if he missed two things. First, the dish tray, now the price tag. Jonas couldn’t have been right about him… it was just a mirage for people inside the walls. For someone to kill that many titans, they had to be some sort of killing machine. They needed him to fit the narrative and his past and facial expression helped him to mold into it seamlessly. The narrative I broke out of as a child. 

“For Humanity’s Strongest? Free. Thank you for fighting the titans, Captain.” Without a word, I put the bread in a paper wrap and handed it to him. I had hoped he would say something back so I could talk to him more, but like every Scout, he just turned to walk out of the doors and probably back to the outside of Trost. 

“How long till you don’t come back, Captain?” 

                                                                                                      Chapter Two →

Chapter Masterlist

[lobakmerahs]

One: Painting and Its Secrets

Summary: This series is about Levi’s slow burn relationship with the reader who is not only a squad leader but a spy who works under Scouts Regiment.

Warning: mentions of death

A/n: I hope you, whoever you are that will read my series will enjoy it as much as I do when I wrote it. Thanks and have a pleasant reading! :)

~ 🎨

3 weeks before...

A blond platinum wig in a pixie cut, button down shirt in beige, a dark brown suspenders, a pair of pants in olive green with a jacket in the same colour. Last but not least a black fedora on top of the head. You stared at your reflection in the mirror, making sure that you looked completely different from the real you at the same time not wanting the disguise you were wearing would catch unnecessary attention. After you were fully satisfied with your look, you took your steps outside your little home.

It was supposedly your off day and you were strolling at the Stohess District and went to buy a newspaper before taking your seat at an empty bench while facing the river. After a few moments had passed, you glanced at your watch and stood up to head to your destination. 

Hans Art Gallery. You were on time when you stood in front of the art shop as the business was just begun and you were the first one to enter. 

“Good morning and welcome to Hans Art Gallery. Is there anything that I can help you, Mrs?,” the gentleman asked. 

“A bouquet of tulips for the man with the black shoes.” You answered to the gentleman who was not wearing a pair of black shoes but upon hearing your sentence and clearly understood your code, he went to the back of the gallery before returned to you and handed the canvas piece that was neatly wrapped with an oil paper. 

You calmly walked to your home and naturally looked around you to make sure no one was tailing before you entered your house and produced a soft click sound as you locked the wooden door behind you. You didn’t go straight to your room, instead you climbed to the attic and yet again locked the door. Slowly you unwrapped the frame and brought out your forceps as well as your scalpels, no need to ask how did you get those. The canvas held a drawing of an evening sky which was rich with every shades of orange colour capturing the beauty of the sunset, it seemed like it could bring calmness to whoever that laid their eyes on it, but what people didn’t know, didn’t have to know as well as didn’t have the right to know was what lied beneath the drawing. Yes, the drawing was undeniably beautiful, it was made by none other than one of your assets in the Wall Sina that disguised as an art dealer among the nobles. The said asset had planted a few layers of documents under his drawing which was the main reason you were about to form a surgery on the work of art. Meticulously, you ran your scalpel on the border of the drawing, next you brushed your thumb along the already cut borders to make the edges curled upwards then you used your forceps to peal the drawing away, revealing layers of papers which were believed to be the documents that were hidden beneath it. 

“Hmmh.. hmmm~ yare yare, found ya’.” You whispered to yourself and smiled in relief, taking out the pieces of papers and gave it a read. 

The documents contained the Military Police reports of Nicholas Lovof’s crimes that included bribery, kidnapping, murders and any other atrocities that were enough to put someone under justified punishments. Not only that, the documents also included a detailed descriptions as well as names of the people that were in charge to kill Erwin Smith, a good colleague of yours, thanks to Nicholos’s manipulations. The said people were; a young red-haired girl styled in pigtails, another young man with a light-brown hair and persumably the oldest one of the pack,a sharp dull blue eyes man with a black hair styled in an uppercut. 

Then, you made a copy of the documents and kept them in a scroll so you could send them to Erwin, where the original copy of them were properly sealed in an envelope for you to send them to none other than Dhalis Zachary.

~🎨

You took a deep breath, inhaling the morning’s crisp while staring at the blue sky. It was always your favorite thing to do, starring at the sky, focusing on the colours that it held. From the wide ranges of blues, to the variety tones of the white from the clouds and sometimes the contrast colours of orange or pink that appears during dusk or dawn. 

After you had enough of your morning pill from the sky, you stepped out of your chamber and was greeted by your best friend, Hange with a raised of both your eyebrows. Both of you did not need much words to greet each other most of the times. You were best friends since your Training Corps years. Morning wasn’t the time for you guys to start acting real with each other. So, both of you walked by each other to the mess hall to get your breakfast then attended the assembly Scout Regiment’s concourse. 

During the morning assembly, you lined up beside Erwin as you were also a Section Commander and had your comrades under your unit to stand in a line behind you. As you were standing, you could see there were 3 people standing beside Commander Keith Sadis, and were introduced to the whole Scout Regiment as the new Scouts. One of them was a girl with red-brown hair tied into two pigtails, named Isabel Magnolia, the other was a man with dark blond hair named Furlan Church and the last one named Levi, a shorter man with black hair styled in an uppercut. All three of them were assigned into Flagon's unit much to his dismay. You glanced at Erwin by your side and he gave you a knowing look. While others found those new Scouts’ names foreign, both of you were exceptional and for a good reason. 

They were surprisingly good during their training, for some people who never had a formal training using the ODM gear, they performed fantastically well but they still needed some polishing for their Titans killing skills, except for Levi. You were always up to offer help to them but they often misunderstood since you usually looked cold and always a bit brutal during your trainings which were a famous fact among the Scout Regiment. Farlan and Isabel often thought that you hated them since they received resentments from severel other Scout cadets and thinking that you were also in the same boat as the other Scouts. Levi was always with his bored expression, you could barely read his expressions let alone his thoughts, unlike the other two. There was a time where Isabel blurted about why you insisted to help training them when you seemed to dislike them.

“It doesn’t matter if I like you guys or not, people train to kill the Titans and to survive. You guys seemed to rush things and hiding something, as if you wanted you to get done with killing Titans then move on to do something else that isn’t Titans related and I’m here trying to help you not to get killed by Titans”, you answered. There was a short silence followed after your answer. You could tell their breaths hitched for a moment but you remained stolid nevertheless.

“Well, we have to move on to do something else as in to focus on the formation right?”, Furlan replied with a hint of nervous. 

“Yeah, let’s hope so.” You answered. 

~🎨

In life, there were a lot of moments where the air would be tense and the night before expedition was one of them. The night was calm and quiet but you couldn’t ignore the heavy feeling in your heart. Tonight was just another night inside the wall but to some in the Scout Regiment, it would be their last. Tomorrow’s expedition would surely cost some of your comrades’ lives and might even yours, for the sake of humanity. 

You took a deep breath. But it still didn’t help to calm your nerves. You had been pacing in your room since dinner. You couldn’t stay still, palms were sweaty and heart was beating unsually fast tonight. Something bad was going to happen tomorrow. You could feel it in your guts. You recognized these telltale because whenever you felt like this, you’ll end up receiving death news be it your favorite neighbour from your hometown, your beloved pets or even the Scouts that you had helped in training. Deciding that sitting in your room wouldn’t help lessen the nerves, you grabbed your pencils and sketch papers then headed outside to gaze at the starry night sky to do some sketches in hope of easing your mind. 

As you arrived at you usual spot at tower of the Scout Regiment barracks, you slumped down and took a glance at the sky. The moon hadn’t shown itself yet, and there were thick clouds hanging everywhere. Then, you stared at your paper and pencil. Blank. No idea. No inspiration. Stuck. You sighed, and continued to stare at the night sky hoping to relax your mind for awhile. Then, you heard the sound of clicking boots which meant that there were people not far from you. It was Furlan and Isabel whom just arrived, they walked to a figure that you assumed to be Levi. You remained quiet and peeped them from your location. You could heard Isabel and Furlan trying to convince Levi about them joining tomorrow’s expedition. As you were eavesdropping not that you planned to in the first place, suddenly your hand started to sketch the paper, starting with the clouds and adding the diamonds in the sky, slowly without you realizing it, you were sketching the trio starring at the starry night sky under the moonlight that shone magnificiently. 

When you were done with the sketching, you returned to your room as quietly as possible and continued to add colours to your drawing before you got sleepy and finally free from your anxious feeling earlier. Before you headed to your bed, you jotted down the date behind your work which now known as painting, no longer just a sketch.

_

During the expedition, you and your squad were put around the right flank of the long range formation. There were few Titans appeared throughout the journey, none that your squad could handle. You were beyond grateful that all of your squad were still well and alive at the moment. Then, you received a signal to tighten the formation since the sky started to show sign that it would rain soon and a heavy one at that. You commanded your squad to pull on the hood of their capes and stayed as close as possible with you and each other so that no one would go unnoticed and it would be easier to assist if anything happen.

Despite the heavy downpour, your squad kept moving forward and you efficiently assisted your squad in killing any Titan that came in the way, it was always your promise to make sure everyone under you would return to the wall safe and alive. Then, suddenly you heard a weird noise coming from in front of you, not the usual strange noise that a Titan would make.A load, short but multiple groan as if a Titan was in pain. So, you rushed to the direction of the sound assuming that there might a cadet or a squad that needed your assistance. 

You arrived at the same time as Erwin’s and some other squad leaders, surrounded by an Abnormal Titan’s and plenty of your other comrades’ corpses. Then, you noticed Levi standing next to the Titan’s dead body with blood all over him and Isabel’s head in front of him with half of Furlan’s body not far from him as well. Levi seemed to be the only one survived from his squad. His head hanging slightly low, with his hair covering his eyes but the tears streaming down his cheeks didn’t go unnoticed by you. So, this explained the sweaty palm and racing heart you had another night- to see two cadets that you helped with training days ago, only now left with just just head and half of a body. You felt your shoulder fell and knees slightly shaking. You felt like your breath had been taken away.

As the rain started to stop slowly as the sunshine gently peeking from the clouds, you watched how Levi was about to kill Erwin which was stopped by Mike then Erwin explained about the Nicholos Lovof's situation causing Levi to stop his actions and stood silently, digesting the fact that he was caught up in Erwin’s plans. 

You did feel bad for Levi, Erwin wasn’t the only who knew about him and his friends’ true intention of joining the Scout Regiment. You knew about it too. It was your assignment to obtain the information about Nicholos Lofov’s crimes and sent it to Erwin as well as finding out the person who was assigned to supposedly kill Erwin. It was just a simple guess as to why those three didn’t refuse so much on joining he Scout Regiment when Erwin offered them to.

You were assigned with that task since you were not only a Section Commander but also a spy under the Scout Regiment as well as the cadets under your wings and some were also assets scattered across the town in disguise as an art dealer in Wall Sina, a commoner who opened a bakery shop or could be anyone in the town that simply invisible to the world but not to you. You needed to sniff around to obtain crucial informations that could contribute to the Scout Regiment strategies, formation and as well as humanity. 

~🎨

The barracks became quieter after the expedition ended which was normal due to the lost of lives. You were at your room that night, just checking your report before you could submit them to Erwin the next morning and decided to write some notes in your book. You opened your drawer and saw the painting that you made before the expedition took place. Levi, Isabel and Furlan staring at the sky. Two of the were smiling in admiration to the sky while Levi just being Levi, stoic as ever except his eyes where they were packed with ......hope. 

You suddenly felt drenched and decided to go for a glass of water at the kitchen before you headed to sleep. You inserted the sketching into your notebook and brought them with you to the kitchen, it just came across your mind to let Levi had it since you remembered how shattered he looked when he was kneeling in front of Isabel's head. The kitchen was empty when you arrived so you went to grab a cup and filled it with water.

As you took a sip of water from your glass, you saw Levi entering the same room as yours. Both of you were startled for a second yet no words left your mouths before he proceeded to make himself a tea and you with your drink. The room was filled with silence but not an uncomfortable one, at least for you. That was when it slipped your mind that you wanted to give the drawing to Levi. Only if he would accept your drawing. You thought he might wanted it since that drawing was an evidence of a sweet memory that his two friends left him during their short time in the Scout Regiment. Probably something for him to look at when he felt lonely. He was stirring his teaspoon with his back facing you when you called his name. Probably the first time having you calling his name. Probably the first time you would ever interact with him ever since he joined the regiment.

“.....um..Levi,” you called. That’s when your heart skipped a beat. And you felt a bit....just a bit nervous to see him reacting to you. Then, he turned around and faced you, intense dull blue eyes focusing on your eyes, expecting you to continue. You gulped. Man, was his gaze always this tense? You never noticed that before for sure.

“I was at the tower the night before the exhibition, with my sketching utensils because I needed to calm my nerves. Then suddenly you guys came and I made something. I didn’t plan doing it, I just went with the ideas flowing in my head,” you stopped and brought out your painting to his attention. He stayed focus listening to you and eyes never left your face before he took the drawing and examined it. You couldn’t say he was amused but his gaze did soften a little. 

“I’m sorry I draw the three of you without your permission.I know I should have asked your consent. And um, you could keep that...... If you want though,” you continued. You felt quite nervous not because you were scared of him, shy probably but not scared. You were nervous because one, you wished your drawing didn’t remind him of his late friends in a bad way and caused him more sadness, two, you didn’t want him to get mad at you for drawing him without his permission and three, um...what if your drawing looked like a toddler’s work? That would suck.

“It’s nice,” Levi finally spoke. His deep monotone voice comforted your ears. You breathed out a relief. 

“I want to keep it,” Levi said, hand still holding your drawing, eyes travelling back to yours with a softer gaze and as if asking for your permission. 

You nodded, “sure, make it yours, I do hope it’ll help you feel better, if that's even possible”, you replied with a soft chuckle as you slowly stood and got ready to head back to your room.

You saw Levi took a glance at the drawing then looked at you again before he replied you with, “thanks, I’ll treasure it.”

You flashed a small smile before yawning and took off to your room to get your sleep. Feeling light and at ease, knowing your drawing could help lift up someone’s mood.

Little did you know that, back in his chamber, Levi stared at your painting. He indulged himself into the painting that you made, every drop of colour as well as every line and traces left on the paper by you, realized how he missed watching his lost friends’ smiles and thanks to you, he could see his friends’ smiles once again eventhough it was just on a piece of a paper. Not to mention, he finally got to interact with you. You striked a mysterious aura when you first appeared before his eyes which intrigued him to get to know you, yet he never had a chance or a reason to talk to you but you were always there somewhere in the back of his mind. He was utterly grateful with the drawing you made, at least he could carve the smiles of his friends into his mind, their smiles might no longer exist in this world but it would always be in his heart and mind. 

                                              Next chapter

[actress4him]

Bonus Whumptober Content Part 2

Original Whumptober fic here

Bonus Content Part 1 here

Find it all on AO3 here

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Thanks for all of the support on the last chapter! I appreciate each and every one of the likes and reblogs and follows I’ve gotten.

Tagging @outtacommission again because Keith would not have been resurrected from the dead without his bribery.

Here is chapter 3 of this fic... see you next week for the conclusion!

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Fandom: Voltron: Legendary Defender

Warnings: referenced amputation, blood mention, referenced broken bones, self-esteem issues, suicide ideation, death mention, nightmares, abandonment issues

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When he woke again, he was lying back down on the pillow, staring up at the blank white ceiling. For one, blissful moment, he didn’t remember the events leading up to him passing out again. But it all came crashing down on him an instant later, taking his breath away.

My leg.

My leg, my leg.

My arm, my face, my leg.

“Keith?” Shiro’s voice was quiet, tentative. Not like him. “Are you awake?”

He wanted to roll over on his side and ignore him. Close his eyes, maybe go back to sleep, pretend that the world and this nightmare didn’t exist for a little while longer. The only reason he refrained was because he wasn’t sure if his stupid, wrecked body could actually manage it.

“What did you do to me?” It was only a whisper, and as slurred as it was, he wouldn’t have been surprised if it was impossible to understand.

Shiro’s breath hitched audibly. If Keith had been looking at his face, he was sure he wouldn’t like the anguished expression that he would see there. But at that moment, he didn’t have the capacity to care.

“Do you want me to...explain...how it...happened?”

No. Yes. He didn’t know. He needed to know why him losing a leg had been the best option, but at the same time he wasn’t sure if he could handle hearing about it. In the end, he just lifted one shoulder - the one that actually listened and responded right away - in a shrug. 

Shiro shifted in his seat, leaning forward so just the tip of his white bangs were in Keith’s periphery. “I already told you that you...died. On that planet. So when we got back to the Castle, you dying again was a distinct possibility. We...it’s like Fallenta said. We had to get you into a pod, even though your...your left arm was broken, and your knees, especially, were a mess from where the console landed on them.”

He paused, rubbing his palms together. “We didn’t know what would happen. I was scared to death that some of those breaks wouldn’t be able to be fixed after the pod. I mean, we were headed to Tellima, but…” His head dropped. “We had no choice. That hole in your stomach...you were dying.”

Keith could almost imagine it - the frantic atmosphere in the infirmary, the blood everywhere, the desperate conversations escalating into shouts as they debated on what to do. He had no doubt that he really had been dying, that they had made the choice they thought was best. He just wasn’t sure if he agreed with that choice. 

“When you came out of the pod, once the stomach wound was healed enough for you to be stable, Fallenta started working on re-breaking the bones so that they could be set correctly. It was...awful.” The shudder was obvious in his voice. “I’m glad she was able to do it, of course, but I’m also glad that you were unconscious the whole time. Your arm was relatively easy. Your left knee...it took her hours. It was in so many tiny little pieces. And your right…”

Automatically Keith flinched at the reminder of what was no longer there. Of the scarred, chopped off stump that lay just underneath the blanket, and the way his leg just...ended. He could see the void where the rest of it should have been even now, if he were to look down. He was purposely avoiding it.

Shiro heaved a huge sigh. “Unfortunately, your right knee was shattered in a way that had been blocking the circulation in your lower leg the whole time. The tissue down there was...dead.” He paused again. “Keith, I’ve...trust me, I’ve gone ‘round and ‘round in my head ever since we...trying to figure out if there was something I could have done differently. And...I don’t think there was. We did what we had to do to save your life. I’m just...I’m sorry that we couldn’t save your leg, too.”

His leg was gone. 

Would he ever be able to walk again? Could they find a prosthetic for him like Shiro had, that worked as well as the real thing? Even if they did, how long would it take him to get used to walking on it? Just walking, not even counting anything like running, jumping, fighting. 

Fighting was what he did. It was the one and only thing besides flying that he was good at. He was crap with a gun, he couldn’t sit up in a sniper’s nest like Lance. He needed to be able to move. If he couldn’t, even just for the time that it took to learn how with a new leg and an arm that only half worked...

They’d replace him. What good was a paladin who was crippled? Who couldn’t pull his weight? As soon as Red woke up and found out what happened to him she would realize that he was useless now. And the Princess, the rest of the team...they already knew it. They were probably already looking for a new Red Paladin. How long would it be until they dropped him off on Earth, or on some Coalition planet? Probably as soon as he was healed enough. They didn’t have time to keep taking care of an invalid, they had a universe to save.

They did. Not him. Not anymore.

“Should’ve left me there.”

There was dead silence for a moment.

“What?”

Keith tipped his head back further into the pillow, eyes roving over the featureless ceiling as if he’d see something new. “I tol’ you not to come. I tol’ you to leave me there. You didn’t listen.”

“And now you’re alive.”

“Yeah, but why?”

“Keith…”

His hands fisted in the blanket, jaw clenched in sudden fury. “Don’t ‘Keith’ me. Why, Shiro? Why am I alive? What is the point? You know what all this means.”

It meant he’d be alone. And he couldn’t...he couldn’t do alone. Not again. Not when he found a group of people that he actually cared about for the first time in so long. Not when he was just finally getting used to always having people around, always having someone to talk to or distract him from the thoughts that tried to consume him. Not when he barely survived it the first time. 

He’d rather be dead than alone.

Shiro sucked in a deep breath through his nose. “That life is gonna be hard for a while? That you’re gonna have to work harder than ever to get back to where you were? Yeah, Keith, I do know. I know more than anyone else.”

Oh.

Shiro must think he was so incredibly self-centered.

He was self-centered.

He should have thought about how acting like losing a leg was worse than dying would seem to the man who had lost an arm and kept going. But instead he was all caught up in how he was going to lose everything he had grown to love and rely on. Acting like the self-absorbed brat that everyone at the Garrison except Shiro had accused him of being.

“That means I also know how hard it is to accept,” Shiro was saying. “It’s going to take time to adjust. But you will, I promise, and I’ll be here to help you every step of the way.”

Yeah, right. Keith didn’t know if he was lying to make him feel better, or if he just hadn’t yet realized or accepted that Allura and the rest of the team wouldn’t want to keep him around.

“Just...please, Keith. Please don’t say that we should have let you die. You don’t know…” His voice caught. “I’ve spent these last weeks hoping, praying that you would live. Scared out of my mind every moment of every day that you wouldn’t.”

Keith finally forced himself to turn his head toward his brother and saw him brush the back of his wrist across his eyes. Just that movement was enough to make his heart drop to his stomach. Shiro didn’t cry. At least not where anyone could see him. 

Slowly, he slid his hand out across the bed, palm up. A peace offering. It took only a moment for Shiro to take it, squeezing it so hard he thought a few more bones might break.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. And he was. Not for thinking it, but for saying it. He didn’t want to cause any more pain for any of his friends. 

That’s why when it was time for him to go, he’d do it quietly. No fuss. Don’t let them see your fear or your pain - he had learned that long, long ago. He was good at it. 

Shiro gave him a shaky smile. “It’ll be alright, Keith. I promise.”

Swallowing down the words that sprang to his tongue, he gave a nod. “Okay.”

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The next morning Keith woke up to an empty room. In a way, it was a relief. They obviously didn’t see the need to watch over him and baby him twenty-four-seven anymore. But he was, for all intents and purposes, stuck. With no leg, he couldn’t just get up and leave the room whenever he wanted, head to the training room like he normally would in the morning. There’d be no training for him for a long time. 

Of course there was breakfast to think about, too, and he wasn’t sure whether to expect someone to bring it to him, or to bring him to it. Either way, he hated it. He had always hated being treated like he was helpless, and now it was even worse because he actually was helpless. 

He went ahead and made up his mind, though. No matter what their plan was, he had no desire to be carried through the Castle to the dining room where everyone would give him those looks of pity. Poor Keith. Can’t even walk by himself. It’s just too bad he can’t stay.

He was in the midst of pushing himself up off the pillows, trying to get his right side to cooperate long enough to get in an upright position he could balance in and trying to ignore the strange lightness of his leg, when the door opened and Pidge slipped in.

“Hey,” she said softly. Padding over, she perched carefully on the edge of the chair that first Hunk, then Shiro had occupied. 

Tucking his left leg up close to him - the knee creaking in protest at being used for the first time since healing - Keith cleared his throat. “Hi.” 

Silence fell, but it had never been awkward between the two. The introverted arms of Voltron. Pidge just gazed at him for a long moment, her eyes saying all the things he knew she would never actually be able to say with words. “It’s good to see you awake. I was really worried about you.” 

On the outside, she merely shoved her glasses back up into the bridge of her nose and sniffed. “You better not quiznakin’ ever do that again.”

Keith’s lips turned up at the corners for the first time since waking the day before. “Alright.” 

Besides Shiro, he thought he would miss Pidge the most of all. They got each other more than anyone else.

“So.” Straightening up, she whipped a tablet out of her hoodie pocket. “We’ve been working on a leg for you. The Tellimites have crazy good medical technology, so obviously we’re using their notes, but I’ve also been talking back and forth with the Olkari, because they’re, of course, crazy good with biological connections, and we’ve come up with a design that should communicate really well with your body and, essentially, work like the real thing.”

She launched into a detailed scientific explanation of how every inch of it worked, tapping and flicking through various diagrams that just looked like a plain prosthetic leg to him. He didn’t understand but a few words here and there, but he let her talk. This was one of her passions, and it was nice to let her be able to ramble about it for once without having to worry about being rushed. The way her face lit up was worth every second.

“So...what do you think?” Suddenly she sounded uncertain as she blinked up at him. “We definitely want your input on it. I mean, I suggested putting in a rocket booster, but Hunk pointed out that it would be difficult to control with only one. Lance wanted to add lasers that shot out anytime you stomped your foot, but that seemed pretty dangerous for like, running and stuff, so…”

It almost sounded like they expected him to still be fighting with this thing. Well, maybe he would. Eventually. After all, he wouldn’t feel right about just ignoring the existence of the war when the people he cared about were still out there fighting it, so he’d do his best to get back into shape. Maybe he could convince them to find a Coalition planet for him that had soldiers he could fight with someday.

It wouldn’t be the same as fighting with this team, his...his friends. But at least he wouldn’t be completely useless.

He met Pidge’s eyes and realized she was still waiting on an answer from him. Part of him wanted to keep his words to a minimum, not wanting her to hear his new speech impediment, but he swallowed his pride. “It, uh...whatever you guys come up with I’m sure will be great.” He actually hadn’t even been sure whether to expect them to work on it themselves, or put it off on the Tellimites or some other able species. It made sense, though, that Pidge and Hunk would want to jump on this opportunity to design something they had never gotten to do before. He forced a small smile. “But...yeah, let’s hold off on weaponizing it.”

Smirking, Pidge turned off the tablet and stuck it back in her pocket. “Alright, if you insist. Lance is gonna be super disappointed, though.”

“I’m sure.” He could hear the whining and complaining about how boring and unimaginative he was now. 

“So, I was supposed to ask you about breakfast…?”

Keith stared down at his hands. “Oh. Yeah. I don’...think I’m really ready to...try to move around yet, so…”

He was such a bad liar. But Pidge either didn’t notice or was being nice and pretending not to, merely nodding and standing. 

“Okay. I’ll tell Shiro, he’ll probably bring you a plate down here.”

“Thanks, Pidge.”

She turned back from the doorway and smiled softly at him. “No problem.”

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The nightmares came that night.

And the next. And the next.

Snippets of things he didn’t remember during the day, and wouldn’t remember again when he woke. Alarms blaring. Lights flashing. A horrifying crunching sound, then crippling pain and a bitter taste in the back of his throat.

And then...nothing. No one came. No one heard him calling. He stayed there, alone and bleeding in the dark, until the pain became too much and he slipped away.

He woke with tears streaming down his cheeks and a scream on his lips that didn’t quite make it out into the still air of the infirmary, not knowing what he was even crying about other than the nauseating loneliness that weighed him down, pinning him to the bed. 

Forcing his right hand to be the one to clumsily scrub away the tears - because it was going to work, dang it - he gritted his teeth and pushed against the weight to flop over onto his side. 

Get over it. Get over it, get used to it, stop being such a baby. You’ve always known that this wouldn’t last. It’s a miracle they’ve stuck around for as long as they have. If you try to hang onto them they’ll just end up hating you before they leave. 

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He got away with hiding in the infirmary for two days before Fallenta declared him well enough to be up and about, and Shiro and Allura showed up with the Altean version of crutches. They escorted him slowly down the halls of the Castle to the dining room, chatting amiably the whole way. Keith assumed it was meant to either distract him from his plight, or to keep themselves from staring and pitying.

“Hey, look who finally decided to join us!” Lance announced loudly as soon as he hobbled into the room. “It’s about time you were out of bed, Mullet-head.”

“What Lance means,” Hunk sighed, “is that it’s good to see you up, Keith.”

“That it is, Number Four!” Coran rushed to pull out his usual seat, and his smile was so bright Keith couldn’t even be mad about the special treatment. “You had us all worried for a while there, for sure!”

Swallowing, Keith fiddled with his spork, unsure whether he was supposed to respond. “Um...yeah. Sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize, Keith.” Shiro smiled at him softly, knowingly. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

He just barely kept another ‘sorry’ from escaping. Instead he nodded, picked up his spork with his left hand, and changed the subject. “So, uh...wha’s been going on lately?”

That was all it took for everyone to launch into tales of short missions in the Lions, repairs on Red, and alliances with Tellima. Keith barely remembered to keep eating his goo as he watched all of the animated faces and gesturing hands with a small smile on his face. It was good to be back among his teammates. They were so unlike him in so many ways, it was no wonder that he had never really fit in with them. But he cared about them anyway. They might not feel the same way about him, but he was so glad that they had become a part of his life. 

And now they wouldn’t be anymore. Scowling down into his bowl where no one would notice, he poked at the green goo. How did I let myself get so attached? Before Shiro, it had been many, many years since he had let himself care about anyone this much. He should have known better by then. Letting himself come to consider any person or place home was just setting himself up for heartbreak.

As much as he loved spending this last bit of time with them, he almost wished they would stop acting so natural, as if they weren’t getting ready to kick him out any day now. No one mentioned a search for a new paladin. No one said whether they were headed to Earth, or some other planet. 

He wasn’t going to be able to stand the suspense for many more days. They needed to just get it over with.

.

Later that night, after waking from another nightmare back in his own room, Keith stared at the bare walls, so lifeless compared to the other paladin’s rooms. Maybe I was always prepared for this moment, after all. Or maybe he had just been kicked out and left behind so many times that the ability to settle in was impossible for him no matter where he went. 

Struggling to sit up, he groped for the crutches and pulled himself to his feet. He wasn’t going to get back to sleep anytime soon, and no one had expressly forbidden him from venturing out on his own - not that it would have stopped him even if they had.

It took far too long to make it down the four hallways between his room and Red’s hangar. Walking with crutches used a whole new set of muscles that he wasn’t used to accessing, and trying to force his right side to carry that much weight was exhausting. He had to stop and lean against the wall, panting for breath, several times along the way. 

But he made it, eventually. He paused once more outside the door, debating whether or not he was actually ready to see the damage done to Red, before he sucked it up and punched the scanner.

He wasn’t ready. 

The great mechanical beast was lying on her side, a position that somehow managed to make her look vulnerable despite her hulking size. Her legs were splayed awkwardly as if she had just been dropped there. She probably had.

The worst part, though, was that her face was nearly unrecognizable. What had once been her muzzle was completely smashed in, there were spiderweb cracks across one of her dull grey eyes, and the other was missing altogether. 

Actually, he took that back. The worst part was the cold and the silence. 

No purr in his head to greet him. No eyes lighting up in recognition of her Paladin. No warmth filling up his chest and spreading out to his fingers and toes. With Red, there was always some kind of heat. Now, though, a shiver shook his body.

Clenching his jaw, Keith forced himself a few steps closer, until he could reach out, balancing precariously, and lay a hand against her warped, dented nose. It was cold, too. 

Suddenly tears sprang to his eyes for the first time since his panic attack a couple of days before. “‘m sorry, Red.” He stroked his hand over the metal, feeling all of the bumps that shouldn’t have been there. “I’m sorry this happened to you. You didn’t deserve it. You...you’ve always protected me, and…”

Tipping his head back, he took in the mess of a cockpit again, and this time he saw flashes of his nightmare. Something sharp pinning him to the chair. Blood dripping onto the floor.

One tear escaped, sliding rapidly down to his chin. “I don’t even know how I survived this. But if either of us deserved to survive, it’s you. Please, Red...if you can hear me at all...please don’t give up. I know I...I can’t fly you anymore, but…”

It hit him then, the brutal truth of that statement. He’d never fly her again. He might never fly anything again. He’d known it ever since finding out what had happened to him, but now it stabbed him through the heart, how much he was going to miss this semi-sentient alien ship. 

Before he knew it, he was falling none-too-gracefully to the floor, one hand planted in front of him while the other remained on her snout, crutches clattering loudly to the side. The tears came in earnest, then. “Red...Red I lost my leg. I...I can’t fight anymore, I can’t fly…I’m useless.”

He’d told her that before. That time, though, she had reassured him that no, he was her Paladin, he was a defender of the universe, not useless. Never useless.

But now there was no one to reassure him. Even if she had been able, Red would know the truth. He wasn’t her Paladin anymore, he wasn’t a defender of the universe. He was useless.

Next

[dreamwritesimagines]

Burn The Witch 10 - Bad Influence [Bucky Barnes x Reader]

A.N: Thank you so much for your wonderful support and feedback my loves ! ❤ Here’s an extra chapter, I hope you like it as well and please let me know what you think! ❤ Thank you! ❤❤❤

Warnings: Enemies to lovers, fake dating, mentions of blood, sex, violence, death, manipulation, language, guns, knives.

Summary: Some nights are more hectic than others.

Series Masterlist

Oh hell no.

Tonight was supposed to be a normal night. Boring even. You were supposed to stay at home, watch a cliché horror movie, eat noodles and worry about whether your fake boyfriend, who didn’t know he was your fake boyfriend, was safe and sound on yet another secret mission of his.

Okay, maybe not that normal of a night.

But what was not supposed to happen was your ex-boyfriend showing up out of nowhere at your door.

“I know we left things off a little awkward but that’s no reason to point a gun at me. I was just doing my job.”

“Walk away,” you said, “Go back to the circle of hell they unleashed you from.”

“I heard you’re fake dating Barnes?” he asked, “He looks like your type.”

“I’m going to give you three seconds, then I will start shooting.”

He hissed in a breath,

“Except you can’t,” he stated, “You have to keep your cover. Milkshake waitress having a gun? People would start asking questions.”

“You’re right,” you said through your teeth, “A knife would be much more silent.”

“What’s taking you so—“ Keith called out but he stopped talking as soon as he saw you two. His eyes narrowed almost immediately and he took a step but you threw yourself in front of him, knowing he was about to punch him.

“Keith, I got it.”

“What the fuck are you doing here dickhead?”

“Nice to see you too Keith,” Julian said, “Am I interrupting something? I always kind of wondered what was going on between you two.”

“Ew!”

“If I didn’t want to punch you before, I certainly want to do it now,” Keith stated and you shook your head.

“I got it,” you said, “Really, it’s fine. Go back to the living room.”

He gritted his teeth, “I’ll fuck you up the moment I get you alone, Julian.”

“I can pretend to be scared if you want,” Julian deadpanned as Keith walked back to the living room and you tucked your gun into the waist of your shorts again, crossing your arms.

“So what crossroad is missing its demon right now?” you asked and he tilted his head.

“Y/N.”

“Why are you here?”

“I wanted to say hi,” he said, “Is that so bad?”

“Yeah. Considering the shit you pulled, it is bad.”

“You would’ve done the same thing.”

“No I really wouldn’t,” you said “What, am I supposed to believe you’re here to say hello?”

“Yep,” he said, “It’s customary to meet or re-meet your team leader on a mission.”

You blinked a couple of times, gawking at him before you let out a bitter chuckle.

“Oh fuck no.”

“Hey take it up to the General, I didn’t ask to be put on a mission where you play the honeypot,” he said, “Speaking of, is Barnes head over heels yet? I know how charming you can be when you want to, call it a first hand experience.”

“You’re not a part of my team.”

“I sort of am.”

“It’s my team,” you insisted, “I didn’t give okay to you being on my—“

“I’m afraid that’s above both of our paygrades,” he pointed out, “Nothing you can do about it. Trust me, I won’t enjoy this either.”

“Oh you won’t?”

“You think I will enjoy watching you have a relationship with the goddamn Winter Soldier?” he asked, “As fake as it may be, it will look real.”

“You’re so full of shit.”

“So I take it he doesn’t stay over yet?”

You ran your tongue over your teeth, shaking your head, “You know what?” you said, “I think I’ve had enough of this bullshit for the night. It’s always a displeasure to see you Julian, fuck off now.”

You slammed the door on his face and ran a hand over your face, making your way to the living room.

“General put him on the team?” Keith asked, “Is he serious?”

“Looks like it,” you checked your wristwatch, “I need to talk to him. Do you think I can-”

“Don’t call the General right now,” he interrupted you before you could finish your sentence, “You’re angry, and I get that, so am I but wait until tomorrow.”

“Keith, he can’t be in my team!” you insisted, “He can’t be trusted, you know he can’t!”

“Hey,” he grabbed you by the shoulders, “I know. I know what he’s done, I know he can’t be trusted. But the rest of your team got your back, okay? Especially me and Chloe. What happened at that last mission won’t happen again.”

You threw your hands up, “Ugh, fuck this shit!”

“We got this—” he started but then your phone started vibrating on the couch, making you both turn your heads. You leaned over to check the screen, then snatched the phone off the couch when you saw Bucky’s name flashing.

“I should take this,” you murmured and made your way to the bathroom to close the door behind you. You jumped into the empty bathtub and answered the phone.

“Hi Bucky.”

“Hi darling.”

Even the sound of that was enough to make a small smile warm your face and you closed your eyes, leaning your head back to the bathtub.

“You could’ve just texted, you didn’t have to call.”

“Nah I wanted to hear your voice.”

Your smile widened as you bit down on your lip.

“I wanted to hear your voice too,” you murmured, for once dropping the act, “God, you have no idea what kind of a terrible night I’m having.”

“What’s wrong?”

You scrunched up your face, scolding yourself in your head. “Just a…just a bad night.”

“Girls at soup kitchen are giving you a hard time?” he asked and you let out a chuckle.

“No,” you said, “I just heard some less than ideal news.”

“Do you need me there?”

You raised your brows, “Aren’t you on a secretive and highly dangerous mission?”

“Yeah,” he said, “Doesn’t matter, I’ll come if you need me. Do you?”

The clear difference between your ex-boyfriend and your current, albeit fake boyfriend was impossible to miss and you felt your throat getting tighter before you coughed.

Fuck no, you didn’t cry.

The last time you genuinely cried was when you were 16, and quite frankly you had no idea if you were even capable of doing it anymore.

“It’s fine,” you managed to say, “It can wait. Date night when you come back though.”

“Of course.”

“And actually I’ve been thinking about that,” you said, “It’s my turn, right? To pick the place?”

“Mm hm, we last went to Brooklyn.”

“So I was thinking what if we did one modern and one old times?” you asked, “I can pick the modern dates and you can pick the old times dates.”

“Huh,” he said, “That’s a good idea. Wait, you’re not going to drag me to one of those nightclubs, are you?”

You giggled, “Would it be that terrible?”

“Please don’t do that to me.”

“You don’t like dancing?”

“Not that kind of dancing.”

“You know, I keep waiting for you to actually utter the words ‘back in my day’, but it’s not happening.”

He chuckled, “Back in my day, we wouldn’t call that dancing.”

You hummed, slipping a little in the bathtub, “Good point,” you said, “So okay then, it’s settled. I got the modern and you got the old dates covered. What does that entail anyway? Home cooked meal dates?”

“Nope,” he said, “We’re dating, not married.”

You pulled your brows together, “How is that relevant?”

“Me being at your place or you being at mine would be very frowned upon,” he tut tutted, “Us together, without anyone else. Inside and privacy and all. Scandal, there’d be lots of gossip about your virtue.”

A clear laughter escaped from your lips and you covered your mouth with your hand, trying to pull yourself together.

“Right, my virtue,” you played along, “So I take it you have never been alone with a girl back in your day then? Since virtue was a huge deal?”

There was a pause on the other line, “I mean it wasn’t— it wasn’t that huge of a deal for everyone…” he trailed off, and you clicked your tongue.

“But overall, no Netflix and chill?”

“What’s Netflix and chill?”

You bit inside your cheek, trying to ignore the warmth at the pit of your stomach, “I know you hate to hear it, but you’re so cute.”

“No I’m not.”

“Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me,” you taunted him, “I won’t tell anyone.”

You heard Sam calling his name and there was a shuffle before he cleared his throat.

“I gotta go,” he said, “Promise to be safe?”

“Right back at you.”

“Good night sweetheart.”

“Good night.” you said and hung up, pressing the phone to your lips before you shook your head at yourself. You got off the empty tub and opened the bathroom door to step out, then found Keith busy with the noddle boxes in the kitchen.

“It’s still hot, and I took the liberty of texting Chloe,” he said, “She’s on her way.”

You tried to offer him a small smile.

“Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it,” he grabbed the chopsticks, “But we might want to finish Scream before Chloe gets here, because knowing her, she will make us watch a rom-com.”

                                                ***

You should’ve known trying to change the General’s decision was a lost cause. He listened to your multiple reasons why it was a bad idea to have Julian in your team, but you could’ve been talking to a wall and it still wouldn’t have made a difference.

“I’m aware of your past with Julian,” he said with a sigh after you were done listing your reasons, “Trust me, this wasn’t an easy decision to make.”

“It’s not about my past with him, sir.” You forced yourself to say, “He can’t be trusted. He’s not a team player, he doesn’t think about anyone but himself-”

“It wasn’t just my decision to make him a part of the team, it was all your superiors’,” he said, “We believe that you’re professional enough to pull this off.”

You gritted your teeth, “Sir, it’s not—“

“He’s in your team and a part of the mission now,” he cut you off, “You’re dismissed, Shrike.”

You dug your fingernails into your palms and nodded, then left his office to march up to Chloe and Keith who were huddled over Chloe’s desk.

“What did he say?”

“That he’s not going anywhere.”

Keith clenched his jaw while Chloe heaved a sad sigh.

“I can try to talk to him if you want, but…”

“It won’t make any difference,” you said, “I know.”

Keith crossed his arms, leaning back to the desk, “I mean we could always poison Julian.”

“Keith.”

“Or he could get caught in the crossfire. Spies die like flies, you know that.”

“Don’t say that!” Chloe exclaimed, “You guys are spies too and I already feel way too worried about you.”

“No worries, the only type of death Y/N will get from Barnes is la petite mort.”

You smacked him on the arm, “Fuck you, we’re not sleeping together yet.”

“But you sort of want to,” Keith said, “I heard your giggling last night while talking to him.”

You shifted your weight and threw your shoulders back, “Yeah, so? It’s my cover.”

“Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t want to fuck his brains out.”

“I’m not even going to dignify that with an answer!”

“I’m kind of excited about that too,” Chloe said and both you and Keith turned to her.

“Please tell me you don’t want to sleep with Barnes—“

“No!” Chloe said, “No I just… when Y/N wants to, we’ll go and get some vintage inspired lingerie so I’m excited for that.”

“We’re not going to do that Chloe.”

“Yeah, let the guy see the good things 21st century has to offer Chloe,” Keith winked at you and you rolled your eyes.

“You know what, I didn’t give you shit when you were the one undercover in Brazil and had to—“

“Y/N,” Julian’s voice reached your ears and a shiver ran down your spine, making you clench your teeth, “You have a minute?”

Chloe stole a look at Keith who glared at Julian while you raised your brows.

“Not for you Julian, no.”

“I just joined the team, you have to update me.”

“Actually she doesn’t because I already gave Sarah your file and I know that she gave it to you two hours ago,” Chloe stated and Keith nodded.

“Yeah and you’re standing a little too close, so why don’t you step back a little?”

Julian shot you a look, “Seriously? And you’re okay with this?”

“He’s right, you’re standing a little too close,” you stated, making him sigh.

“Y/N, we’re on the same team,” he reminded you, “We need to get along.”

“Actually, you’re on my team,” you corrected him, “I’m the leader in here. So technically, I don’t have to get along with you. You have to get along with me, seeing that you work under me.”

A small arrogant smirk curled his lips. “Wouldn’t be the first time I worked under you,” he said, “Brings back the memories.”

Your eyes narrowed and you tilted your head.

“It really does,” you mused, “The memory of the most boring ten seconds of my life, you tranquilized mattress.”

Keith snorted out his coffee while Chloe gasped, staring at you. You smiled at Julian sweetly, then grabbed your phone.

“Well, I’d better go,” you said, “Some of us have a mission to lead after all. I’ll see you guys later.”

“Have fun,” Keith said without taking his eyes off Julian, “I know we will.”

You winked at them and walked out of the bullpen, grinning to yourself.

                                     ***

The following two days were an actual disaster. Bucky wasn’t in the city so you had nothing to do and nothing to report about. Not only that, you had also made it your own mission to avoid Julian but so far that mission had been a success.

You were beginning to suspect Keith and Chloe had something to do with it.

There was also something at the pit of your stomach. Something that made you both sad and uncomfortable at the same time, like an itch you needed to scratch and no matter what you did, it wouldn’t go away.

Chloe had this genius theory of you missing Bucky, but she was absolutely wrong.

You were just done with counting the money and locking the register when you heard the wind bell by the door chime, but you were way too busy with trying to place the mason jars on the shelf to even look around.

“Sorry, we’re closed,” you said but there was no answer. You froze for only a second before the spy in you kicked in and you grabbed the mason jar tighter before reaching out to grab the nearest knife. The footsteps didn’t signal that it was more than one person and you would throw the jar and judging by the angle of his shadow he would probably lean left to dodge it and that would be when—

“Hi beautiful.”

You whirled around, still holding the jar tight before you dropped it on the counter with the knife, staring at Bucky standing by the door.

“Oh thank God….” you rushed to jump into his arms and he caught you, lifting you off the floor as you wrapped your arms around his neck, inhaling his scent deeply. Somehow just his presence was enough to make up for these last terrible days and you closed your eyes for a moment while his hand cradled the back of your head, pressing a kiss on your temple.

“Hi,” you giggled as you pecked him on the lips, “I didn’t know you were back!”

“Oh we just arrived,” Bucky said as he put you down, “Sam went home and I came here. He says hi by the way.”

“Hi back,” you said and the duffel bag on the floor caught your eye, “Wait, you literally just arrived?”

“Mm hm.”

You hummed, pinching his chin between your fingers as you turned his face, making him smile.

“No bruises,” you commented “That’s a good sign. You scared me though, I thought you were a robber!”

“Yeah, speaking of,” he said, “Where’s your friend?”

“Tara? She had a date, and the part timer had an emergency, so I’m closing today.”

“By yourself?” he asked, “That’s not exactly being safe.”

“I can take care of myself,” you taunted him, “I’m glad you’re back.”

“Glad to be back,” his smile widened, “Come on, I’ll walk you home.”

“Oh you don’t have to, you know I live close by. You should go home and get some rest, you look like you haven’t slept in days.”

“Y/N,” he said patiently, “It’s night time—“

“Meh, evening more likely.”

“It’s dark outside,” he said, “I’m walking you home, come on.”

You thought for a moment, then heaved a sigh.

“Okay,” you said and looked around to see whether you had missed anything, then grabbed your jacket and switched off the lights. He adjusted his duffel bag over his shoulder as you locked the shop then you both started walking.

“So I take it the mission was a success?” you asked, entwining your fingers with his vibranium ones. He still wasn’t used to it and he hesitated for only a second before he held your hand.

“Something like that.”

“How are you going to celebrate?”

He frowned, “Celebrate?”

“Yeah!” you said, “A nice thing happened, why wouldn’t you celebrate it?”

“We don’t really… celebrate missions.”

“Why not?”

He thought for a moment, “I don’t know,” he admitted, “Can I- can we celebrate it then? Together?”

“Oh we absolutely can,” you nodded, “How does tomorrow sound? It’s my time to pick the date, and I’m picking a bar with lots of celebration drinks.”

“There won’t be any dancing in this bar, right?”

“Not yet,” you wiggled your brows, “But I’m warning you, I have plans. We will push you out of that comfort zone of yours.”

“My shrink would like you.”

You tilted your head, “Is that a good thing?”

“Yep,” he said, “How about you? Do you feel better?”

You heaved a sigh and made a face, “Trying.”

“Anything I can do to help?” he asked, “Anything at all, I’m serious.”

A small smile warmed your face and you looked up at him.

“It’s fine,” you said “Thank you for asking though. It means a lot.”

He squeezed your hand like he was trying to assure you and you turned around to see him better as you stopped in front of the building.

“I’d ask if you wanted to a cup of coffee upstairs but…” you sighed dramatically, “My virtue and all.”

“Right,” he played along, “Of course not. We can’t have your neighbors get the wrong idea.”

“No chaperone or anything…”

“I’m astonished you’d even think of such a thing miss,” he said, trying to keep a straight face and you bit down on your lips.

“Well, thank you for being the perfect gentleman, mister,” you taunted him, then stood on your tiptoes to brush your lips against his, his arm around your waist tightening. He looked down at you as you pulled back, that soft light crossing his eyes again.

“Good night Bucky.”

“Good night,” he stole a kiss from you again and you giggled, then made your way into the building. You took the elevator and as soon as you reached your floor and stepped out, you found Keith fumbling with his keys by his door. He looked over his shoulder and you tilted your head, staring at his blood stained clothes.

“Why are you covered in blood?”

“Why are you grinning like a high schooler with a crush?” he asked back and you tried to control your expression. “Something tells me the answer to both of those questions is the same.”

“Mission?”

“Mission.”

You hummed and went to unlock your door as well while Keith leaned sideways to his doorframe.

“At least one of us is having fun on missions,” he pointed out and you curled your lips, shooting him a look.

“Aw you poor baby,” you said, “I’m sorry.”

“No you’re not.”

“No I’m not and you know why?” you pointed at him, “You didn’t bring me coffee the other day.”

He gasped dramatically and you let out a laugh, then closed your door behind you.

“That Barnes guy is a bad influence on you young lady!” he called out before closing his door as well and you chuckled to yourself, shaking your head.

“Yeah,” you murmured, “I think you might be right.”

Chapter 11