#like i still feel fatigued in a way thats telling me i need a break... but in a week i go home for Thanksgiving so i just have to make it

[alucart]

actually fuck it lmao

got hired late september. started actual work in october. started off as a seasonal worker. every day i woke up for work i was dreaded it. it was so much work. i was fatigued everyday but i still had to give it my all or else i was "lazy". if i moved too slow i was considered rude to customers. if i dont smile im rude. if i take a minute to process something then "something is wrong with me." like. Okay. lmao.

obviously when applying for jobs i dont list the fact that im bipolar. hell, i probably have adhd. but beside the point, the fact i have to act a certain way just to keep a job thats barely paying me shit was so. annoying. the fact that while working seasonal i had to put up with so much shit was ridiculous. november and december was so awful. im still mad i had to wake up at like 4am to get to work at 5am and then the store wasnt even busy until 12am. and we had to wear red and make sure everything was perfect bc the ceo was coming to the store? LMAO?

after my seasonal hours were over i thought i was free. i wasnt working for like two weeks but i at least got to spend time with my family. clean. take care of myself. i actually got back to drawing, something i havent been able to do for months. and then they called me back for a full time position. of course i took it because i wasnt finding anything else but it mightve been the worst mistake like ever.

like i must preface, that i got the job for the seasonal position in the first place without an interview, and like, yes i knew that was fishy at the start but also, ive been looking for a job for over two years so i was desperate. somehow the full time position was even worse than the seasonal position. my manager felt more annoying.

not to mention at this point they were making me do shit that i was never hired to do. why am i organizing clothes? i take returns? why are you making me cover in the handbags department? i work in returns and help people with online orders? why are you making me pack online orders? I WORK IN RETURNS, HELP PEOPLE WITH ONLINE ORDERS AND I HAVE PROCESS RETURNS FOR ORDER PICKUPS THAT WERE NEVER PICKED UP?

honestly madness. i had many breakdowns. over not wanting to go back to work. one time i had a stomach virus and had to stay home from work and was so miserable and literally panicking because i thought i could lose my job from being sick. i had a coworker that they also hired full time and she got fired because she "took too many breaks" meanwhile there was another coworker that took way more too many breaks.

while working there i saw many people get fired. like i dont know. and it was constantly understaffed. one time my manager asked me if i could work for 50 hrs one week and i told her "i'll think about it" only to find that weekend she changed my schedule without asking. (i had a breakdown that weekend).

when they had me set up my availability i had changed it so i would get mondays and tuesdays off because i realized i need two days off in a row instead of two random ass days and they didnt even. abide by that. and by the time it was like that on my schedule i already lost my job because i "violated company policy" because i accidentally scanned some fake coupons. which mind you, i never did anything wrong at the job beforehand so i shouldve really got a warning instead of being straight up fired.

but i honestly think they just wanted to get rid of me because i couldnt get enough people to sign up for a credit card, which again, i work in returns, so most people doing a return do not want to apply to a card. to expect someone in returns to have someone sign up for a fucking credit card everyday is insane. telling people that its not really a credit card is even more insane. the fact that im still stressed out over this because im fucking unemployed is. insane!!! and i dont even know if i can get unemployment. i feel like crying.

[blkkizzat]

I've been following your blog for a while now, and I hope this isn't weird to ask but I think you may have the best answer since you're an amazing writer. My friend has been taking down their works and giving up on telling others they even write fics because they feel no one likes their writing. They think this because when they ask for feedback it's silence. They keep comparing themselves to other writers and I feel bad they don't believe they're a great writer. As a writer did you ever have these feelings or do you have them now at certain times? I just want to be a good friend and motivate them to keep writing.

Oh wow. Well first, thank you so much! That really makes me happy you 1) like my writing so much but 2) even coming to me with this question!

(this is a long reply sorry lol but two parts, advice for friend and then my own personal insecurities)

Advice for your friend:

First, who your friend is asking? Are they asking on their blog or to a group chat or dms to others? Even though it shouldn't seem like it asking for feedback on your blog is probably the worst way. People rarely even reblog nowadays so asking them to take the time to comment and give something meaningful isn't likely going to happen (also people could feel shy too!).

However, I would tell your friend to reach out to people who regularly interact with their content the most and ask them if they would beta read or provide feedback. It may seem a bit intimidating to ask especially if they don't know them but if the person is liking their content that much I'm sure they would be flattered at the ask. Or start interacting with other writers more whose work they do like. I wouldn't ask right off the back for tips and feedback but if they begin chatting with them regularly and become mutuals then it'd be okay to then ask. A lot of writers, myself included, love talking about writing.

But at the end of the day tell your friend to write for their own satisfaction in their own perspective. My thing is if it don't make me, cry, laugh, horny or any of the main emotions I want to feel while writing it I keep working on it. It's my fic and I can't get anyone to feel an emotion if I don't feel it when I am writing/reading it back. Thats also what gets me out of my funk cause I tell myself I will continue to work on it until i do like it.

I'm not saying here to not care about interactions (cause everyone wants feedback) but to just write until you personally feel good about it and to be honest about when that is. You will feel a lot better about the work you do put out when you write for your preferences alone and I feel more people respond to that as well. Even when taking requests, sure people are asking for something but at the end of the day they are asking for your version of it still. People don't want to read you trying to be someone else they want to read you! Think of it like this. Never doubt your idea. Your plot is rarely the problem because we all end up recycling similar ideas, nothing is revolutionary here. As far as technical skill you can improve your writing by being more descriptive, using a variety of different words (use word lists for smut/feeliings/etc), and tapping more into how the characters are feeling in the moment. About my insecurities:

I feel like its natural to be your own worst critic and I am definitely mine. You are never going to view yourself or your work as others view it which is a shame because I feel like people wouldn't struggle so much with insecurities if they could honestly tap into others true thoughts of them at will.

About mid-fic is where I notoriously hate every single fic I write and have to will myself to push through to finish it. I love writing but working on one story at a time can be fatiguing so I tend to work on multiple. That way if I am stuck and hating something, I can hop to another and give my brain a break as I am usually overthinking it/too deep in it and need to step back.

I honestly don't compare the quality of my work to others as I do like my style as much as the frequency of work I do. I am a very slow writer and I write in a very non linear fashion where I write sections and then weave them together and then comb over them 3-4 times before moving on to the next part and jump around. It stuns me how some writers say they never re-read their work because I will reread 10x times tweaking things here and there until my OCD is satisfied and I'm happy with it. I definitely get envious of writers who can just pump out quality fics like hot cakes and post multiple times a week. I'm lucky to get 1-2 done in a month haha. Especially frustrating when I have a ton of ideas (like almost 30 fic ideas currently) I'm dying to write and like 5+ half written fics cause I keep jumping around lol. To top it off I'm more of a descriptive writer so a fic being under 5k to me is a miracle lol.

I love reading others fanfics too (what inspired me to write in the first place!) but sometimes I have feel guilty and not been able to really enjoy because I'm like "I'm reading these when I could be writing mine and i have like 10 requests sitting in my inbox on top of that lol."

Clearly I'm long winded af cause I did not mean for this to be this long either lol. But I hope you got something from this that can help your friend. Keep being encouraging to them! I'm glad they have you in their corner!

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[iwaisuke]

confessions; but not remembering it

ft. kita shinsuke, sakusa kiyoomi x sick fem!reader

genre: fluff

masterlist

a/n: this has been sitting in my drafts for a while and then i rushed bc i was getting tired 🙃 also. sakusa's is a little ooc. sorry ab that

-» ˚⸙͎۪۫⋆

» the clean yet musty smell of rain filled the gym as the boys practiced. it was a surprisingly humid and rainy spring day today here in the country side of hyogo

» "achoo" you had been sneezing and coughing all day. you also had a terrible headache but took some medicine to see if it would help. the spring allergies really getting to you

» you didnt reay have the time to be worrying about yourself. As a 2nd year manager of the inarizaki team, (recommend by suna) and the boys working so hard practicing for nationals there was no way you'd let this little cold get in the way. you had to work just as hard as everyone else!

» "hold on, im about to hang up your jerseys to dry"

» "i got you guys some fresh towels!"

» "i can run and grab that coach. im headed that way anyways"

» the coach called for a short break to rest up for a bit. everyone was sore and exhausted from practicing every day. "here. i filled your water bottles up!" handing them to all the boys. "y/n you're all wet" akagi sounded concerned.

» "hm? oh its alright. I'll dry off in a minute. i took the shortcut to the drinking fountain to refill your waterbottles instead of taking the long way" you nonchalantly said. "so you ran through the rain like an idiot?" suna threw a clean towel over your damp hair and ruffled it. "suna!! stop!! you're gonna ruin my hair"

» "like i said. its alright" you reassured the boys.

» kita, on the other hand had noticed your fatigue. although he wasnt as perceptive on peoples feeling and thoughts as well as others, he could easily pick up signs like yours. he admired you dearly for how hard you always work for the team. how you willingly did anything to make them smile. how you always put others first before yours. needless to say, he had a bit of a crush on you.

» "l/n san. i think you should take a break too. there's no need for you to be running around for us while we're resting" kita assured you. "i still have a few things left on my list to do.. but afterwards I'll take a break!" kita let out a sigh. you were stubborn sometimes and kita knew you were the kind of person to not stop until you're finished.

» "I'll be right back. i gotta grab the laundry"

» making an excuse to leave, your heart was beating fast. you knew kita's words were the kind he'd say to anyone, but it made your heart feel fuzzy when he'd look out for you.

» the stone cold captain who you thought he was, actually was so kind. he was just a little awkward like you, and a little blunt with what he said sometimes. but you learned the great qualities he carries and how much he actually cares about others well being. he was a hard worker and you couldnt help but absentmindedly fall for the captain.

» running up the stairs to the second floor of the gym, you felt a shift in your step. head becoming dizzier than it was just 5 minutes ago. legs trembling, you started falling before feeling a presence behind.

» kita's arm wrapped around your waist, supporting you in efforts to not letting you fall over. "i told you to rest l/n san" kita said sternly. "you wont benefit anyone if you keep overworking like this."

» you knew kita was right, but you really didnt want to rest knowing you'll be letting the team down by not working hard.

» "i promise I'll rest as soon as im done with this one thing" pleading with kita. he let out a sigh, knowing you really wouldnt until you did finish so he allowed you to do so.

» finishing grabbing all of the dry jerseys and bringing them downstairs to pass out to everyone, you didnt really notice atsumu and osamu spiking volleyballs at each other until aran yelled

» "y/n! watch out!" honestly, you were too tired to move out of the way so you figured, it do be like that sometimes, and allowed the ball to hit you.

» or... so you had planned the ball to hit you.

» kita stood in front, blocking the impact of the spike that you had prepared yourself for. there was agitation in kita's eyes. more than you usually noticed when then twins were miss behaving. concern washing over, he looked you straight in the eyes

» "... is there something wrong kita san?" lifting up his hand to your forehead, he let out a sigh. "why didnt you tell me earlier you had a fever", then walking over to the coach meanwhile atsumu and osamu come over to apologise for being reckless.

» "get your stuff. we're going home" kita said bluntly.

» "huh? but practice is-"

» "please l/n san. for me"

» kita would only take yes for an answer this time. no if's ands or buts. so here you were, walking home with kita. only the sound of raindrops hitting your shared umbrella being heard.

» muscles starting to ache a little more and your legs becoming more tired than they were when you left the gym, you began to walk a little slower every step

» "get on my back l/n" "its ok kita san, i can walk. its already enough that you're walking me home" "i didnt ask if you wanted to. im telling you to"

» you couldnt tell if it was the fever that made your face warmer or if it was kita's words. nonetheless, you got on kita's back. he was a lot stronger than he looked and you couldnt help but stifen at being so close to your own crush like this.

» "relax. I'll make sure you get home." he reassured. you leaned into his back, warmth seeping in, your eyes began to feel heavy.

» "kita san" "yes?" "thank you for always watching out for me"

» a comfortable silence was met as the sound of rain filled your ears.

» "kita san" "hm?" "did you know..." your voice softened "i like you a lot kita san"

» did he hear you correctly? if he wasnt paying attention he wouldve missed what you had said, being drowed out through the pitter patter of water. now his heart thumping louder than ever before.

» "l/n san-" he was about to go on but was met with the gentle rise and fall of your chest and the soft snores of you on his back, knocked out from exertion. kita let out a light chuckle, finally relieved you were resting.

» you had missed the next day of school, but when you came back the whole volleyball team bombarded you with love.

» "WE'RE A FAILURE TO NOT NOTICE YOU FEELING SICK" atsumu cried. "how could we let our one and only precious manager get ill for taking care of us" akagi, clearly dissapointed in himself. "please let us know when we can take care of you too y/n" aran said.

» "its no big deal. really!" waving your hands in defense. "it was just a small cold. but i do have a question though"

» all the boys gathered around to hear what you had to say

» "how did i get home?? i really dont remember what happened after i almost got hit by atsumu"

» it shocked the guys honestly. you genuinely didnt remember a single thing due to your fever. "wait? you don't remember kita taking you home?" suna replied, your face becoming red. "k-kita san took me home-?" "yah. he left in the middle of practice to do so" osamu added.

» immediately, you got up to find the captain that apparently took you home the other day. he was in the storage closet cleaning and grabbing the equipment for todays practice.

» "kita san" "oh. l/n. glad you're feeling better" his smile brightened the musty closet. "about that, im sorry for troubling you and having you take me home the other day. i honestly dont remember what happened after i almost got hit by atsumu. my mind was really fuzzy that day, but im truly thankful for you going out of your way for me. it really means a lot"

» kita was dumbfounded. you really dont remember? "no need to apologize l/n. it was my responsibility as a captain. and afterall, what good would i be if i couldnt even take care of the person who means the most to me"

» your heart raced. 'person who means the most to me' ? cheeks blushing a rosy pink, you were internally thanking the musty store room from being dim.

» with arms full of equipment, kita walked by you and stopped.

» "by the way l/n san. did you know?"

» ears perking up at the vague yet familiar line

» "i like you a lot too l/n san"

» now we all know sakusa HATES germs and for the past week and a half, he's been telling you to keep up with washing your hands, wearing a mask at all times even when you eat omi it doesnt work like that. pls especially since you are prone to getting sick easily no matter how hygenic you are. your immune system just hated you. PERIODT

» you remembered sakusa scolding you for running out of hand sanitizer and then the next day you were out of commission. bed ridden with laryngitis, cough, slight fever, the whole works. it was like your body was making fun of you or something

» you texted komori, asking him to take notes in class for you and relay homework information while you were at home resting up. but there was one request you had and made komori PROMISE.

» DO NOT TELL SAKUSA YOU GOT SICK

» "he's probably gonna notice your absence y/n. he'll find out about it either way"

» "well if you dont tell him then he wont know. its not like he even cares about where i am like that"

» "thats what you might think. but i know he's gonna say something i can garuntee it"

» the next day at school, sakusa did notice your presence missing. it was quieter not having a 3rd person in the group of friends. not having you around to talk to him when komori was gone.

» pulling out his phone to text you, he asked where you were that day.

» "on a family trip :D !!! forgot to tell you, but I'll tell you all about it when i come back!" you wrote, attaching an old selfie of a different trip you went on to make it more believable.

» you had hoped this silly cold would get better in a day, but soon that day turned into 2 and then 3 and then 4... you pretty much missed the whole week of school at that point

» Friday rolled around and komori was on his phone all day. sakusa noticed his cousin fidget in his chair more than usual and it irked him to see him like that

» "what's with you today?" one eye raised, sakusa finally asked. "uhhh nothing really" komori wasnt very good at keeping secrets lets just start off with that, but he was trying his best.

» "well clearly somethings wrong. you're fidgeting." "well haven't you noticed somethings been different all week?" komori hinted

» sakusa sat there in thought. nothing's been different? he ate the same breakfast he usually does every morning. all his studies have been well. there were no tests this week so there was no reason to be anxious like komori was and even if there was, he would've done well anyways.

» "just tell me what it is." sakusa was starting to get annoyed. "y/n..." komori started. "y/n?" "do you know where she's been this week?"

» did you not tell komori about your family trip? you usually told komori everything, but then again you didn't tell him either until he asked you about it.

» "she said shes on a trip?" he nonchalantly said. komori's eyes started watering. "A TRIP TO THE HOSPITAL THATS WHAT IT IS" he blurted out. komori didnt mean to let it slip , he was just so worried about your well being.

» "hospital?? what are you talking about. did she get injured on her trip?" "no omi. shes been sick all week and her mom just texted me saying she went to the hospital today because shes had a fever for 3 days straight. there is no family trip"

» sakusa's heart shattered. you were sick and didnt even tell him?

» before both he and komori knew it, his legs were running faster to get to the hospital than he had ever imagined he could ever run.

» and there you were. fast asleep in a bed with an IV drip. your face flushed, forehead sweaty and shallow breaths escaping your chapped lips. you were a hot mess but sakusa didnt care. stepping to your bedside to greet your mother she explained to him that she had to go to work and asked if he could watch over you until she gets back.

» sakusa said yes without even hearing the whole thing. his heart and mind saying yes to whatever it took to get you to feel better.

» gosh how he hated hospitals, but what he hated even more was the fact that you were in the hospital and he didnt even know.

» the doctor came in for their evening round and ensured sakusa that you were indeed getting better! your fever had broken not too long ago and your body was working extra hard to heal itself up!

» "is there anything i can do to help?" sakusa asked. he felt helpless in this situation just watching your face distort in uncomfort every now and then, and coughing your lungs out.

» patting sakusa's shoulder, the doctor told him that just being here for you is enough. "you gotta be a strong boyfriend for her alright son? she'll be able to go home tomorrow first thing in the morning if her fever doesnt come back"

» sakusa slumped in his chair at your bedside, the doctors words ringing through his head. 'boyfriend huh?' he thought to himself. "if i was her boyfriend..." he whispered to himself, "i would be a failure for not even knowing my girl was sick..."

» to kiyoomi, you were beautiful. even now in this sad state you were in. deep down he locked these growing feelings he had for you inside of him because he always felt like you were a better match with someone else and after this stunt you pulled of lying to him about going on a family trip, it only made him feel worse.

» it was now night time and you finally began to stir in your sleep, the fever finally gone. sakusa reached out to move some hair that was stuck to your face, fingers tracing the outline of your jaw. your eyes slowly opened and met with his dark orbs.

» "y/n?" "saku- wait this is just a dream. omi wouldn't be here. he hates hospitals" you let out a forced laugh and then a sigh through your sore throat.

» you reached out to sakusa's hands that were resting on the side of your bed. "omi would never let me hold his hand because he'd say im passing germs to him so hopefully dream omi wont be the same" you were aimlessly talking to yourself, not even realizing that this really wasnt a dream.

» he squeezed your hand in return. hoping that you wouldnt let go any time soon. a funny smile appeared on your face just at the thought of him. "even if you're stupid for not realizing how much i like you... i cant wait to see you again omi" you whispered before falling asleep again.

» sakusa didnt know what to do. he sat there frozen in his chair. it was his first time hearing you call him omi. heck. you literally just confessed to the boy. his brain was running wild. groaning in distress he let go of your hand to step out for a breath of fresh air now that you were back asleep.

» it was 5am and your mother came back to the hospital and thanked sakusa for staying by your side. He left in a hurry to make sure you didnt see him there.

» Monday rolled around and sakusa was waiting outside of the school gates for you. he had planned on asking you about your "trip"

» "good morning sakusa!!" your bright and cheery voice rang through his ears. honestly he was trembling inside. the memory of you confessing to him still fresh in his mind.

» "how was your trip?" you stopped dead in your tracks. "haha... it was good !! sorry i forgot to get you a souvenir" you were trying to play it cool but sakusa could tell you were forcing yourself. "i wouldnt want a souvenir from where you came from so its fine" sakusa's words threw you off. "i - im not sure im understanding what you're saying sakusa?"

» you felt a tug on your hand. "dont you mean omi?" his voice husky as he whispered into your ear. cheeks flushed, your brain felt like it short circuted. you've always tried your hardest to not let it slip that you want to call him omi since he hated when people called him that.

» sakusa smirked at your cute reaction he got out of you. letting go of your hand he began to walk into the school leaving you at the gate dumbfounded. "and by the way. you're just as stupid for not realizing how long ive liked you too"

-» ˚⸙͎۪۫⋆

thank you for your order! enjoy~!

[bnhaficsforthesoul]

Pregnancy Series - Surprise! (2)

You Find Out You’re Pregnant/Telling Him

Shinsou Hitoshi

Hitoshi watched as you paced around the room - your obvious anxiety stressing him out as your generally calm appearance faded. Your period was very late, a lot later for it to be just a normal switch in your period schedule, and the app on your phone had been telling you your period should be coming the following day for a little over a week.

“Kitten, what’s the matter?” 

You knew you already discussed this with him and you both decided you were perfectly ready for a baby - but still, it’s a baby! If you’re pregnant, your whole life is completely changing. So it’s normal to be stressed. Along with that, you had taken a few pregnancy tests but they had shown nothing - and with some research you found the best time to take a pregnancy test after a missed period was… now. Which is why in the bathroom there was a test waiting on the counter as you paced the 5 minutes away.

“I’m… trying to figure out something. Don’t worry about it.” He wasn’t all too convinced with your response, but you didn’t want to say that you might be pregnant and get his hopes up if you weren’t actually pregnant. Then, your phone went off, and you speed walked back to the bathroom after a good 2 seconds of being frozen.

“You got this you got this you got this - oh my god.” You were hyping yourself up to look at the test in front of you, and once you did - there they stood - the 2 lines that signified your future. Even with all your previous anxiety, you couldn’t help but feel a weight be lifted off your chest. Now you knew for sure, and the reality wasn’t as scary as it had seemed before.

Hitoshi, who was very confused by your actions, followed you to the bathroom and leaned into the doorway. “What’re you doing?” You jumped a bit, having not noticed him come in as you stared at the test in your hand, but as you went to tell him the good news you were enveloped in a tight hug.

“You’re pregnant?” 

You nodded into his chest, and you saw him bite his lip to hold back a smile as he looked at the test again, “That’s so exciting kitten~”

Bakugou Katsuki

“Well… did you take it? What did it say?”

Katsu had seemed very inpatient to get you pregnant, getting more and more agitated with each time that the pregnancy test showed up negative. He didn’t blame you, it’s not your fault, it’s just you two hadn’t exactly planned around your ovulation cycle and kinda just went at it, so you started at a bad time. 

But this time, you had a good feeling. You texted Katsu as he was busy with hero work right now, saying that you were gonna try taking another test and that you’d tell him the results in a bit. He replied with a simple ‘okay’ but you knew he was staring at his phone waiting for your answer. 

The 5 minutes went by fast, your phone alarm distracting you from the Youtube video you were watching, and you calmly walked to the counter where you had left the test and looked at the results. And just as your gut had told you - it was positive. Finally, you were pregnant!

So, you called Katsuki, who immediately asked for the status of the test. 

“I did~ and guess what?”

“If you don’t say you’re pregnant I’m gonna kill you.”

“Well lucky for both of us, I’m pregnant!”

He didn’t say anything for a minute, the only sound on the phone being the background noises of the city and your occasional ‘Katsu?’ He soon came back to reality however, and let out a choked, “Great - that’s great.”

“Aww, don’t cry baby-” 

“I’m not crying! I gotta go, I’ll talk to you later, love you.”

Once he hung up you could help but laugh - poor thing was gonna start crying at work, but you couldn’t blame him.

Todoroki Shouto

While at work - during recess while you were watching all the little ones play around the playground, you suddenly felt yourself get extremely dizzy, and then - you woke up inside your classroom. All your students and a few teachers stood around you, one of the them telling the kids to go back to recess.

“Y/n, are you okay? You fainted suddenly.”

You nodded, already starting to feel better. “Yeah, I’m fine. Maybe I was just in the sun for too long.”

“10 minutes? If you passed out from being in the sun for 10 minutes you should go to the doctor. I can bring your class in with mine - do you want me to call your husband to take you?” 

“No, no… I’m fine-”

“Y/n - no. Go.”

Sighing, you nodded again, “Fine, I’ll go to the urgent care. I can take myself, no need to worry Shouto.”

As you promised, you made your way to the closest urgent care - it would be a big waste of time but at least you’d see if something was wrong. You arrived, checked in and all that business, and after a good couple hours you finally made it into the office and explained what happened and you just wanted to make sure you were okay. They did all their tests, and now you were sitting there waiting to see if there were any significant results. 

“So after looking at your results, it appears that you are pregnant! That’s very likely the cause of your fainting, as otherwise you seem to be healthy.”

Pregnant? You were pregnant? As you left the doctor’s, her having given you a bunch of information to find an OBGYN and all those things, you thought about how to tell Shouto. You considered calling him, but figured he would rather hear the news in person. 

He came home late at night - and you in your excitement were standing at the door creepily, scaring him a bit when he walked through the door.

“What are you doing love? Why are you smiling like that?”

“I’m pregnant.”

Shouto stared at you for a second, getting the gears in his brain working after a long day of hero work, and his face lit up into a big smile as he leaned over, cupping your face in his big hands as he kissed you softly. “I promise - I’ll be a good dad. I promise.”

Kirishima Eijirou

You had bought so many pregnancy tests in the past few months due to your eagerness to become a parent - every single morning after you spent it taking a pregnancy test. You had gotten used to the single line appearing on the little piece of plastic however, it seemed luck was not on your side as of late.

That is - until you glanced over the test after hearing your phone signify the 5 minutes had passed, and there were 2 lines. The second was faint, you had barely noticed it when you first looked - but it was there. Two pink lines, and you felt tears well up in your eyes. You were pregnant!

Running out of the bathroom and flopping onto the couch - you let out a happy scream. Eijirou, who had been happily sleeping all this time, walked out of the bedroom with a raised brow. “You okay baby? What happened?”

“I’m pregnant!!!” As you let out another happy squeal, Eiji excitedly ran over to you, carefully flopping himself down onto you and hugging you tightly. “We’re having a baby!” He was tearing up too - you were both so happy, after trying for so long you had finally managed to get pregnant.

“Do you think it’s a boy or a girl - I’m fine with whatever. Who’s gonna be the god parents? Ooh, we should probably call your mom-”

Eijirou was letting his excitement overtake him as he rambled on about the baby. You said nothing, instead choosing to watch your husband with a smile.

Amajiki Tamaki

“Bunny, can I ask you something?” 

You were lying on the couch, technically on Tamaki’s lap - having been extremely tired lately for no apparent reason - and just watching some Netflix. Tamaki had been worried about you since this sudden fatigue began, it being odd for you to be so tired all of the sudden. 

“Sure bub, what’s up.” 

He threaded his fingers through your hair, thinking for a moment before speaking. “Well… I was thinking about what could have caused you to be so tired lately, and - well, a symptom of pregnancy is fatigue, maybe thats a possibility?”

That’s true - you had been trying a bit to get pregnant, so you very well could be. “I can go take a test in a bit, after this episode.” You were still tired and didn’t want to get up, but this was kinda important, so you would pick yourself up in a few minutes.

Eventually, the episode ended, and you slowly sat up, ignoring the dizzy feeling in your head as you did so - heading towards the bathroom. “Good luck bunny!” Tama gave you a positive thumbs up and a big smile, obviously hoping that he was right. You smiled back at him and went into the bathroom, digging through the cupboard for the little box that held the pregnancy test.

You sat on the floor as you waited, the cold tile helping to keep the dizziness away. Tamaki had come to sit with you once you were finished, holding your hand tightly as you rested your head on his shoulder.

“Bunny, y/n, look! Look at the test!” 

Opening your eyes, you focused on the test, and your eyes widened as you saw the 2 lines - “You were right, that’s great Tama!” You looked up at him to see small tears flowing down his face, “You’re pregnant. You’re actually pregnant…” He was in a slight state of shock, squeezing your hand tightly as he stared at the test with a happy smile.

Dabi

“Will you get pregnant already?”

“I never thought I’d see the day where you were fucked out.”

Dabi rolled his eyes at your comment, releasing you from his arms and rolling over in the bed. You had just woken up, exhausted and sore from your constant attempts of getting pregnant. Dabi was very dedicated to your goal - to the point where even he was overly exhausted. Boy needed a break. 

“I’ll go take another test.”

He hmmed, wanting to just go back to sleep, and you got up, stumbling a bit due to the numbness in your legs before catching yourself and making your way to the bathroom to grab a pregnancy test from the little pile you had accumulated - you were excited, okay? 

It was a very relaxed process - you had come to expect a negative result but you were hopeful for a positive one, so you were fairly calm as you waited for the results. You scrolled through your phone as you waited, until a few minutes later you decided to check on the test.

A big smile broke out on your face once you saw it, with the 2 very obvious pink lines. Immediately you ran out and jumped onto the bed, causing Dabi to groan loudly and hold the pillow tightly over his head.

“Dabi, come on, wake up - I’m pregnant.”

“It’s about fucking time.”

Pouting, you sat on his stomach and pulled the pillow off of his face. “Dabiii, I’m pregnant. Aren’t you happy?”

He wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you into a hug, “Of course I’m happy. But I’m also tired as hell. Let’s go back to bed, we can celebrate later.”

Shigaraki Tomura

Leaning onto Tomura as he played video games - you attempted to calm your stomach down. You had been nauseous for a couple of days now for some reason, even having thrown up a few times - so you felt overall horrible. Sadly your attempts seemed to be in vain, as you felt the soup Kurogiri had made you start to creep its way back up your throat and you ran to the bathroom, barely making it to the toilet in time to puke.

Surprisingly your boyfriend had peeled himself away from his game to come check up on you - he must be starting to get worried too. “Should I send someone to get you medicine?... Maybe they could grab some of those pregnancy things too -”

“Pregnant! Yes - get me a pregnancy test! That might be why I’m sick!” You knew you hadn’t eaten anything weird lately, and there was no one sick around so it would be odd if you managed to get sick - and with Tomura’s increased need to get you pregnant it made sense that you would be.

He didn’t say anything, just left the bathroom to make someone complete the said task, and came back afterwards to sit with you. Dabi walked in about an hour later, throwing some tylenol and a few pregnancy test boxes towards you before leaving, and Tomura excitedly handed you one.

You shoved Tomura out of the bathroom - since he didn’t want to leave at first - and took the test, tapping your foot impatiently against the wall as you sat on the sink counter, waiting for the alarm on your phone to go off. Once it did, Tomu ran into the bathroom, “Well? Are you?” Looking at the test, you saw two bright pink lines - a big yes. 

Laughing lightly at Tomura’s enthusiasm as he bouncing on his heels like a little kid, you turned the test to show him, “Yup, I’m pregnant.” His reaction was a bit underwhelming after all that drama - him just giving you a “Nice” before going back to his video game. But - later that night, when he thought you were sleeping, you swore you heard him crying as he held your stomach.

[probably-writing-x]

Unexpected

Request from @oldfashiondisturb : The reader is Samuel's sister, and best friend with Nadia, but in love with Guzman since the start of the year. She tries to forget him with Valerio, but some boy aka Guzman is jealous, even if it wasn't planned like this for him, he is the first surprise but he has to do something ? :O

Gif is not my own

Requests are always open❤️

This studying has grown boring almost an hour ago as you flicked relentlessly through pages to keep up with the subject. You, your brother Samuel, and Nadia did this regularly whenever there were exams. It always got dull for you a lot quicker than it did for them but you continued nonetheless. If you actually wanted to pass the year at Las Encinas, you’d have to put up with it.

“Can we take a break?” You groan, tossing your pen down onto the table, “There’s only so much I can do.”

“The test is tomorrow (Y/n)!” Nadia laughs, turning the page in her book and answering the next question with ease.

You run a hand through your hair, “It’s boring! And you know you’ll pass anyway Nadia.”

“She’s just taking Guzman’s influence, right (Y/n)?” Your brother nudges you, a smirk playing on his lips.

You glare at him and try to stop the blush from tainting your cheeks, “We said we wouldn’t talk about that anymore.”

“What? Your obsessive crush on the most annoying boy in our class?”

You hit your brothers arm and stand up from the table, “He’s not that bad. And I’m over it.”

Nadia and Samu share a knowing look and laugh at each other.

“I hate both of you.”

They had a habit of doing this. Ever since you’d first confessed that you might like Guzmán, they’d been set on making little comments to wind you up. Actually, it was Samuel that made the comments and Nadia that laughed at them. Really, she felt quite sympathetic toward you. But they were right - you hadn’t really got over it.

- - - - - -

The test going badly was most definitely an understatement. Maybe you should’ve revised more last night - you could see Nadia inputting answers like she’d been programmed to ace it from the start. You on the other hand? You’d come down to the pool instead to distract yourself.

“Was it really that bad?” It’s Guzmán that questions you as you finish another length of the pool.

You glance up and watch as he walks down the side, eying you for the entire time.

“Wasn’t it for you?” You push yourself up and shift round so you’re sat at the poolside, legs dangling into the water.

He scoffs, “Tests here are always bad for me.”

You smirk a little and run your hands over your slicked hair from the water, setting your goggles onto the surface beside you.

“Lucky for me, I’m a good swimmer,” Guzmán cocks a brow, “I can’t say the same for you.”

“Well, thanks,” You roll your eyes.

You’d grown tired of questioning why you continued to have a crush on this boy. The majority of your conversation with him, which generally only happened at the pool when it was only the two of you, would consist mainly of him mocking you. Other than that? You’d practically be invisible to him around school. He was surrounded by his group and Lu. And you were just Samuel’s sister.

“Don’t wallow in your own self pity, please?” He says as he gears up to start training, “You’ll distract me. And you can’t be that bad.”

It shouldn’t make you blush and you hate yourself for giving into it. But there you were, thankful as he jumped into the water so he wouldn’t see your cheeks turn a burning shade of red.

- - - - - -

“Nadia!” You grin as she walks up toward you and Samuel, always managing to look completely different when she was out of her school uniform.

“Hey!” She smiles, hugging you quickly in greeting, “Sorry I’m a bit late.”

You were all at the club tonight for another party, though they generally consisted of you three sticking with each other - Omar joining you whenever he could.

“It’s not like you were missing much,” Samuel rolls his eyes, glancing around at the growing crowd, “Who’s that?”

All three of you turn towards the boy that had just arrived. He had an appearance that you could already tell would match perfectly in tune with his loud personality. The bold curls on his head, the open arms like he was introducing himself to the world, the bright print on his shirt.

“Lu’s brother,” Guzmán comments as he walks past, heading over to the boy who greets him with a brotherly hug.

You knew Guzmán had probably only gone over because Lu followed behind the boy but you brushed it off quickly. The other boy seemed intriguing but certainly not somebody you’d usually concern yourself with. He seemed far too arrogant, too certain that he would never find anyone as good as himself. But his grin and his carefree attitude seem oddly interesting.

- - - - - -

“So if you take this,” Nadia points to a number on your page that you couldn’t even work out how you’d got to, “And divide it by this... I’ve lost you again?”

You sigh and put your face in your hands, “It’s like I’ve never even learnt it.”

She smiles and tries her best to remain patient, “Thats okay, we can go again if you need to.”

“Is there room for one more in this class?” You don’t recognise the voice as somebody you know but it’s distinctive already - it would only match the new boy.

“You’ll probably be better than I am,” You mutter half to yourself, staring at the page of maths like it would make anymore sense.

“Oh, darling,” He laughs, sitting down in the seat beside you and throwing an arm over your shoulder, “I think you’ve just given yourself a challenge.”

The three of you spend the rest of the period trying to get through this topic before the bell sounds and Nadia packs up for her next lesson.

“I never caught your name,” The boy points out, “I’m Valerio.”

“Valerio,” You repeat, “I’m (Y/n), Samuel’s sister.”

“I don’t care for the family history, you interest me enough on your own.”

And just like that, he seemed a little more intriguing.

- - - - - -

“No seriously Valerio!” You squeal as he lifts you up with ease, spinning you around, “We need to-“

Your laughter soon stops any words from escaping you as he throws you down onto the couch.

“We need to what?” He cocks a brow, hovering above you as he falls closer to your face.

“You’re a distraction,” You comment, referencing the fact that you’d originally come to his house with the intention of studying. Just as you had done the day before, and the day before that.

“(Y/n), you’ve been distracting me since day one.” He mumbles, leaning closer to you as his hands trail up your sides.

Things with him felt exciting. He was living in a whole different realm to what you were used to. He didn’t mock you, didn’t make you nervous - he made you distracted (in more ways than one). You weren’t certain of any feelings for him, any possibility, but he was interesting. And he seemed like a good person beyond this exterior. Though it seemed like neither of you were too fussed about what lay beyond surface level.

He dips down and is just about to kiss you when the door unlocks.

“Valerio!” It’s Lu’s voice.

You watch as he rolls his eyes and presses up to kneel on the couch, “You’re home early.”

“We finished dinner early,” She responds quickly, “I thought you were meant to be studying.”

We. She wasn’t alone.

You push yourself up so you’re now visible to the pair that stood at the door - Lu and Guzmán. Somehow, you and Guzmán make eye contact for a moment and it seems to linger for more than that - like you’re trying to read any expression that crosses his face. But, to your own disappointment, it doesn’t seem like there’s anything.

“With the García?” Lu scoffs, “Come on Valerio, seriously?”

“Lu!”

It’s Guzmán. With an oddly warning tone to his voice.

“I should go,” You say quickly, fumbling to get off from the sofa and grab your jacket.

“Hey, hey, no,” Valerio stops you, standing up beside you and throwing an arm over you, “Is there a problem, Lu?”

She looks between the two of you and tuts, “It won’t last, darling.”

But all you can do is keep your eyes focused on the boy beside her. The boy who now refused to look in your direction. And who oddly seemed to have a completely different energy to him now.

- - - - - -

When you walk in for swim training the next morning, your heart sinks like a lead balloon at the sight of who was just swimming perpendicular to where you walked. Who else would it possibly be?

Guzmán finishes his length and glances up to check the clock, smirking before he turns toward the door. He knew this was the time you always got here in the mornings. Every single time - practically to the exact minute.

“I’m surprised you’re not busy with your new boyfriend,” He calls, not bothering to make any actual effort to look at you properly.

“Shut up Guzmán,” You roll your eyes, setting your towel down on the bench. Maybe he hadnt changed as you’d thought. This still seemed relatively typical.

“What’s he got you doing now? Trying out his latest drug mix? Who can drink the most before they pass out?” He lists, face growing colder and more stern as he speaks.

You don’t respond. Why had you assumed he’d react any differently? You were nothing more to him than somebody to mock, to taunt, to treat as separate from him because you hadn’t grown up like the rest.

“You should be careful with him, (Y/n),” Guzmán says simply, “He’s not like you.”

For the first part of that, he’d impressed you. He’d made it actually sound like he gave a damn. But the second part struck you right back home.

“Not like me?” You scoff, tugging your goggles over your head and hanging them around your neck, “You mean he didnt grow up in a two bedroom flat with three brothers? Or he isn’t only at the school because of a lucky break?”

Guzmán remains silent, his cheeks heating with a tint of red. You take it as just a consequence from fatiguing after swimming.

“Thanks Guzmán but I can take care of myself. That’s what us poor ones do, isn’t it?”

Before he can say anything more, you dive into the water and thank the pool for creating a barrier between the two of you. He’d stay in his lane and you’d stay in yours - literally and metaphorically.

- - - - - -

“Hello beautiful people!” Valerio calls as he walks proudly across the floor towards you and Samuel.

Him and Lu were hosting a party at theirs tonight. It was for some particular reason that you hadn’t paid attention to when Valerio first invited you, but you’d been thankful for the opportunity to avoid some more studying. Things with him had been nothing more than the two of you just having fun to put it simply. It was pretty apparent that you didn’t have feelings for each other. But also apparent that there were other reasons why you needed the distraction. You didn’t care to explain your reasoning to him, and you never pried enough as to find out why he did. For now, you were comfortable with using this to keep your mind off Guzmán. Although maybe it hadn’t been exactly successful in that field yet.

You could tell from his breath as his arm fell around your waist that Valerio had already been drinking enough as it was. You weren’t big on drinking - always growing up fearing when your father would come home drunk. And drugs were a whole different story, with similar reasoning to the first.

“Can I get you guys a drink?” He suggests, swaying into you as he waves his arm at Samuel too.

“I’m fine, thank you,” He shakes his head, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

You’re relieved when Ander and Omar make their way over - hoping they’d at least distract Samuel a bit. He was in no way approving of you spending any time with Valerio, he’d made that very clear. And he’d encouraged you that Nano wouldn’t have let you anywhere near him if he was here.

He turns you to him and holds both arms on your hips, “You look hot tonight.”

You roll your eyes and try to brush him off, “And after how many drinks are you saying that?”

He smirks and leans down to you, lips grazing your ear, “How about I get you up to my level?”

He moves one hand away from you and reaches into his back pocket, pulling out a small clear packet that would be recognisable to anyone. Even the sight of it pools a sickening feeling in your stomach. You’d had far too many sleepless nights on the end of your bed with your brothers, listening to your father’s yelling, smashing, hitting - all as a consequence of the drink and the ‘little white powder’.

“No, no, definitely not,” You try to push him away, hoping he’d be sober enough to get the message and forget it.

“Come on, you’ll love the feeling,” He encourages, waving the packer closer to you like he was taunting a child with a toy.

You try to push away from him again, “Valerio, no.”

Before he can say anything more, there’s somebody between the two of you. They have their back to you and their face close enough to Valerio to instantly intimidate. Originally, you’d assumed it to be your twin brother - expecting Samuel to have the same reaction to the drugs as you had. But the frame is too tall to be Samuel, towering above you. And those broad shoulders can only be owned by one boy.

“Leave her alone, Valerio,” Guzmán’s tone is calm but icy, warning but not stepping above the line.

“Come on!” Valerio chuckles, “It’s a party!”

“I won’t ask you again, man. She told you no, now go take your fucking drugs somewhere else,” He speaks through his teeth, getting closer and closer to Valerio until he grips onto the lapels of his jacket and shoved him away from both of you.

Valerio stumbles just as his sister approaches the outbreak.

“Is there a problem?” She asks with a tone that she’s trying to keep positive.

“Ask your boyfriend, if you can even call him that anymore,” Valerio smirks, swiping a bottle from the table as he pushes through the crowd of people.

Lu looks between you and Guzmán before turning around to follow in the footsteps of her half brother. It’s only then that Guzmán focuses any of his attention on you.

“Are you okay?” He asks, eyes looking between each of yours.

He’s closer to you than he has been before and you take in the scent of his cologne on his torso. Not noticing his height above you until your eyes were in line with his heart.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine, thank you,” You fumble, glancing around at the people who were now solely focused on watching what had just unfolded.

He follows your line of sight and smirks, “They’ll always find a reason to watch.”

Your heart is pounding and your vision trying to keep its focus on his face but he’s gone quickly. He takes off into the party where he blended in so easily and you’re stuck once again with that weird, unsettling excitement he always managed to cause.

- - - - - -

The next morning, you arrive to the pool before Guzmán gets there and you feel your excited heart fail for just a second. Why should you expect anything to come from last night? You’d spent this entire school year expecting something to come from every moment you shared with Guzmán. Why would that party have changed anything?

You set your towel down on the side, hold your goggles in one hand, stretch out a little, and prepare to start your training for the day. But you’re interrupted as the door swings open.

In he walks. Torso and legs exposed as he’s covered by the smallest level of material, hair damp from showering and small beads of water trickling down past his pecks.

“Good morning,” He nods, setting his towel down beside yours as he walks straight past you.

“Morning,” You say, following his path with your gaze.

Here goes nothing.

“I just wanted to say thank you for last night,” You begin, keeping your eyes now focused on the tiled floor beneath you.

“You don’t need to thank me,” He says, tone short and a little abrupt.

“I know, but you really didn’t have to do anything and I-“ You fiddle with the strap of your goggles to try to give yourself anything as a distraction, “I don’t know, I just wanted to-“

“It’s fine, (Y/n),” Guzmán smiles quickly, “But I told you he wasn’t good for you.”

“I know,” You nod, “Nothing was ever going to happen between us though.”

“Have you ever had a boyfriend, (Y/n)?” Guzmán interjects and it instantly surprises you that he takes any interest in your life.

You glance up and swallow the lump in your throat, “No.”

He smirks a little, “I didn’t think so.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“See,” He starts walking closer to you, “I convinced myself that last night I was just helping you out, and I would’ve done it to anybody that Valerio had been pestering. But then I realised that all I seemed to focus on for the rest of the night was you - if I’d seen you wear that outfit before, what drink you had in your hand, how many times you made a joke to your brother. I kept focusing on you and I hated it because I couldn’t understand why.”

You’re frozen still as he speaks, now with only one stride between you and him.

“And then it hit me. It was you. The try-hard, innocent, never been kissed, García Domínguez that I’d never really paid much thought to,” He shrugs, “I’ve got Lu pining over every move I make and the only girl I could think about, was you.”

You can’t tell whether to be annoyed at his description of you or utterly dumbfounded by the fact that he’d just confessed this so quickly.

“And that’s why I’ve been showing up to swim on time every morning, why I’ve been checking with Valerio to see if anything’s happened with you, why I keep listening out for anything you say,” He scoffs, “Because, somehow, I’ve fallen for Samuel’s sister.”

He falls silent and looks down at his feet for a moment before speaking again.

“I don’t think I can go to another party where I have to watch you with him, or turn up to Lu’s and expect to see you there too. I don’t want that.”

“Guzmán I-“

“I’ve been a dick to you, a complete and utter dick. But I swear to you I wouldn’t have done any of that if I’d have known how I felt sooner.”

You let out a laugh at that, “Well, thanks.”

“Though,” He takes a half-step toward you, “You are still failing class and a pretty shitty swimmer.”

“And you’re still trying to convince yourself that you’re not as shit as me,” You defend, finally making eye contact with those piercing orbs.

“Well, that’s it, you’ve had my confession,” He finishes, “Shall we swim?”

[bleufrost]

Can I please request a h/c for Keanu/F!reader, where she is pregnant and how they manage that at different stages and their life in the public eye/public events etc. Thanks so much, I love your work! 💙

Keanu Reeves x Reader: Your Road to Her (pregnancy)

masterlist

a/n: I hope you like this lovely! I focused more on the stages because I genuinely feel like Keanu wouldn’t be the type of guy to allow for the public to get too involved in something so important for him. He seems really protective of his privacy and a baby would tenfold that in my mind, i hope thats okay with you!

**i also want to apologize, i thought i had this queued for a week ago and didnt notice it never went up :(

warnings: pregnancy, mentions of miscarriage (this is fluff tho dont worry!) 

From the moment you and Keanu find out the news, he’s ready and willing to do whatever it is you need. At first there aren’t many signs that the baby is even growing in your tummy, you almost get worried at the lack of morning sickness and cravings. Keanu is always there to reassure you that everything is okay though. 

He takes you to doctor appointments constantly the first month of your pregnancy. The first few are your idea, wanting to do everything right and keep track of the little one. The next seemingly hundred are definitely his idea. He is way more nervous than you are, but he does his best to not let it show through. You need someone to be a rock, and who better than the father? 

If the first month was almost completely normal, the second brings forth hell. There’s a constant feeling of nausea and fatigue radiating through you. Every little thing and smell causes your stomach to churn. Keanu tries at least a thousand different recipes to find something you can keep down, but nothing really works. At the very least, it’s still easy to go out in public and only be put in tabloids for grabbing coffee with your boyfriend. You aren’t quite showing yet and you enjoy not having to hide your baby from prying eyes for the moment.

The third month gets a little easier than the second physically. Mentally is a different story. There was a panic in your mind that you hadn't shared with Keanu the first two months, but in this third you almost feel as if you have to. 

Miscarriage typically occurs within the first trimester of pregnancy and you're so close to getting out of that, but you can't do it alone. 

"I'm scared I might lose the baby." You say it one day after your emotions catch up to you. Keanu finds you a sobbing mess on the floor of the bedroom when he comes home one day. His heart thuds in his chest when he catches sight of you in pain and he worries instantly that something terrible must have occurred. 

"What is it? What happened?" His hands come up to cup your face and he wipes your tears away gently. You shake your head, tears still falling, and he wraps you in his arms. You're safe here. The baby's safe here. Everything is okay as long as you don't have to leave. Eventually of course, you do have to. 

The fourth month leads to the second trimester, and the second trimester means new discomforts. Finally able to eat again, you discover that you really don't have any boundaries when it comes to what you'll happily consume. When one moment you couldn't keep anything he made down, now you were becoming a guinea pig for every new baked good and meal that Keanu feels like testing out. One time you even accidentally eat something that may or may not have been for people, but that's not something you want to think about. 

The random food only fuels the inevitable heart burn and constipation you get though. A large part of you feels gross for the way your body reacts to the pregnancy, but Keanu reassures you time and time again that he finds you to be nothing but gorgeous. 

Now it's not so easy to hide. You both spoke about being in the public eye the first week of your pregnancy. It was a mutual agreement that you really didn't want to be photographed while carrying your baby. There was so little privacy already, your child doesn't deserve to be exposed to the world before they're even able to open their eyes. You stop going out places with Keanu as much, and when you do go out, you're both heavily covered. 

Months five and six are miracles. One night, while Keanu is sitting and reading to you, you feel it. 

"Oh my god." Your hands fly to your belly and you can't stop staring. Keanu drops the book and stares at you with wide eyes. "What's wrong?" You look to him and laugh in both delight and confusion. Without saying anything you grab his hands and place them down so he can feel. It takes a moment, but then it happens again: the small little kicks of your baby as they remind you that they're here and excited and just can't wait to meet you guys. Both of you cry that night, anticipation and joy radiates between the both of you and you know this is exactly where you're meant to be. 

The seventh and eighth months get a little difficult again. News outlets have caught on to the fact that you're carrying and they truly are relentless in their endeavor to get a peek at your baby bump and confirm suspicions.

In a few interviews Keanu is asked to comment on his feelings toward the pregnancy, but he gently declines each time. He hates disappointing people, but you and the baby mean way more to him than any fan or public image

One night an interviewer pushes a little too far. Keanu was near ready to leave the set altogether, angry that someone would so easily ignore his requests for privacy. Luckily, he was able to calm himself down pretty quickly with one thought of you watching at home. Once more, he smiles and declines the questions. 

By the time the eighth month is closing and the ninth beginning, Keanu has gotten into a rhythm of rubbing your feet and back almost daily. The extra weight puts a strain on your joints and it sometimes feels like you're lifting heavy dumbbells every time you move. He's very patient and gentle as he always is, but now he watches every move you make with uncertainty. It's about this time that going into labor can be unpredictable and he desperately needs to be ready for anything. 

With great hesitation, he takes on a new role at this time. He received the script in the mail a few weeks earlier and was ready to decline immediately, but you wanted him to take it. It would help him get his mind on something else and relax. Besides, hearing him research the role and practice lines soothes you in a way that you could never describe.

You laugh the most at this time. The baby can hear their daddy speaking. His animated voice lights up the room and Keanu can always tell when the baby is responding by the giggles that leave your mouth. His heart beats faster at the thought of his child already being so happy with you guys. It calms any nerves he has about his new role as daddy.

There's bags ready and packed by the door for weeks. Keanu sleeps with a protective hand over the baby and the other wrapped around you tight. He wants to feel if anything happens and sleeping this way comforts him and puts his mind at ease because he knows that if you or the baby stirs, he'll feel it. 

It happens one day in the kitchen. You're sitting on a chair by the counter that Keanu had pulled up so you could be with him comfortably while he cooked. The two of you are laughing over a playful argument you were having on how much spice to put into the dish when you feel something wet. 

Your laugh stops suddenly and your cheeks blush with intense embarrassment, but you just sigh and move to get up. Wetting yourself is humiliating, but you know the man standing before you would never make you feel bad for something you can't control. 

He spots the wet floor and instantly his eyes light up. "Can you help me clean this please? I'm sorry." Keanu bolts over to help you stand. He shakes his head in shock and starts leading you over to the front door. "Babe, I need to go change and clean up the mess, where are we going?" 

He laughs in confusion and slight panic, leaving you by the door and grabbing his keys. From the kitchen you hear him call, "Sweetheart, I'm pretty sure that was your water breaking!" You look down in disbelief, surely you would know if that was your water breaking...right? 

A jolt of pain knocks any thoughts out of your head and all you can do is breathe until he gets back to help you. 

All the way to the hospital, Keanu is guiding you through the periodic pains that plague you. Sometimes it doesn't hurt as badly, but then a new wave will wash over you and leave you gasping for air.

The actual hospital arrival is a blur. One moment you see him rushing to check in, the next you can feel yourself being wheeled down a hall. You think you pass out for a moment, but can't be sure. All you know is that you're now in a room being told to breathe deeply. The contractions are not yet close enough together to initiate anything, so you just have to stay as calm as possible.

There isn't a second in your confusion that he isn't there by your side. You can tell he's scared by the way his eyebrows knit together and his hands tremble, yet his smile still lights up the room and his voice brings you down from the discomfort. He reads to you until you feel as though the waves are no longer coming one at a time. They all feel like they're happening at once and he instantly calls for a doctor.

Giving birth is agonizing. The exertion compares to nothing you've ever felt before and you can feel an endless flow of tears stream down your cheeks as you continue to get told to breathe, push, relax, push again, breathe…

Your eyes lock with his, hand reaching out for the strong grip you always seek for support and he wraps it around yours with no hesitation. Unlike most stories you'd heard, Keanu isn't panicking or on the verge of passing out. He's always been highly attuned to both life and death, and as much as he hates seeing you in pain, he knows that this is a fleeting moment that will lead to the most beautiful child both of you have ever seen. Your pain destroys him, but your love and willingness to endure it builds him back up even stronger than he was before. Just one look into his beautiful, deep eyes gives you strength to keep going, so you do. 

As soon as your screams die down, a new one begins. It is by far the most lovely noise that has ever graced your ears, and although you knew it would keep you both up for months, you wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. The nurses clean the baby off just a bit, the real bath could wait. Right now you both need to hold the little one just as much as you need to breathe. 

You are given her first. She is gently placed into your arms and your lip trembles as you can't stop the onslaught of tears that overflow your eyes. She is stunning. Nothing in life could have ever prepared you for just how gorgeous this tiny little baby would be. Her eyes weren't open, but you knew that one look into them would make you gladly give up the world for her. 

In that moment, Keanu feels as though his lungs give out. Nothing matters outside of this hospital room right now and he feels no need to be anywhere else but here. His arm remains where it has been the whole time, protectively holding you. The other, though, is free. He has a strong urge to protect the little girl. His shaky hand comes over to brush the soft hair on her head. As soon as he feels her delicate little head under his fingertips, his heart swells and he lets the tears fall down. 

The little bundle of joy was safe and warm and oh so loved. When the nurses came in, they found the three of you asleep. Keanu held you protectively in his arms, a hand still gently petting the baby's head. Your arms were holding your little angel as your head leaned against his strong chest, finally getting some rest after your long journey to get to the little girl that now felt like home. 

[bow-woahh]

She-Ra season 5 thoughts

A chaotic summary of my feelings/ reactions of each episode! Spoilers. Obviously. 

Episode 1 — Horde Prime

- First of...Adora stop throwing yourself into battle challenge - "You're not She-Ra anymore" — TELL HER SIS - The way Catra was so smug but Glimmer was not having any of it "You're just as alone as I am" if that ain't the truth idk what is - Catra wanting the climb up the ranks? Sis I don't think so let's see how long that lasts - The DINNER pissed me the fuck OFF - Oh yeah here's my obligatory SW FUCK OFF CHALLENGE - Micah, King, glare at her!! Yes!! - The way Scorpia said "Catra thought my singing was annoying" honey - That clone was SO annoying stfu about Prime being omniscient and omnipresent and shit like ugH idC - Bow and Adora are the BROTP - Scorpia stinging Adora to keep her safe - and that's on friendship - The way Prime INSTANTLY called Catra out "Adora means something to you" listen I hate the gay but damn he's smart. He saw right through her act. - "Adora chose her side and I chose mine" that doesn't mean you don't still care Catraaa - Also that was REALLL quick lmaoo the way five seconds she was like "imma climb up the ranks" then in about two secs HP was like "sis I have no use for you" - "What are you going to do to me?" IM CRYING - Adora and those weird flashback PTSD things -- are u okay sis?? - This was the first episode and I already want to cry so....wow

Episode 2 — Launch

- Adora omg she's so fatigued girl S L E E P - Bow getting pissed at everyone for not letting her rest...what a king - Catra disobeying HP and talking back to that clone but then HP took its form...fuck man that shit scary - STOP CALLING HER  LITTLE SISTER CHALLENGE JESUS FUCK - Everyone hates Entrapta wow ouch - Literally Entrapta being horny over robots is hilarious lmaoo - Mermista is a great leader and they worked so well together ahhh! I'm loving Scorpia and Frosta's friendship - Entrapta got the signal!! I'm proud -  Adora stop following holograms and illusions challenge -  Adora being all like "I don't know my destiny anymore but I know I need to save my friend." LIKE YES HONEY -  Glimmer is sO volatile like honey,, did you need to break HP's crystal ball thingy?? DID U?? -  also she knows her dad is alive now and that H U R T S ++ I bet she doesn't know the sword is broken so fuckkl -  Micah as She-Ra?? something I never knew I needed -  SW not being in this episode at all? love that for us - "I reinstate my horray" I LOVE YOU SCORPIA - "Can you stay?" MY FUCKING HEART GLITRA FRIENDSHIP HERE WE COME

Every episode I just feel immense f E AR

Episode 3 — Corridors

- THIS STARTS W BABY CATRA AND ADORA?? NOELLE WHY ARE TRYNA KILL US?? - Catra and Glimmer talking about sleepovers and Adora...damn my heart - Adora and her stupid ponytail 💀 - "I'll never say sorry!" - THE WAY YOUNG CATRA WAS SO JEALOUS EYE— - "There's no one in the entire universe who cares about me." - "Im sorry! For everything." IM SO UPSET WTF -  CATRA IS FUCKED BUT SHE SAVED GLIMMER -  HP GTFO CHALLENGE -  I'm so proud of my baby tho wow... -  What the fuck we gone do now? -  so much happened in this episode so this is a lot shorter because my brain is numb. Catra is gonna get brainwashed?? isn't she?? -  "I want to do that one good thing in my life." IM CRYING Y'ALL

Episode 4 —Stranded

- Adora is like "Catra, Catra?? saved you?? wtaf?” Lmaoo - Bow and Glimmer fighting is hurting my HEART - KYLE HAS A CRUSH ON ROGELIO?? SCORPIA DONE EXPOSED IT AHHH - Swifty tryna contact Adora?? kinda cute - him impersonating everyone was onbrand and kinda funny ngl - The way Adora is like "it's complicated" lmaoo girl everything is w you - I live the star siblings omg yeS - "I have to save someone. Someone I—" omFG ADORA - Adora is S T R O N K - she GLOWED OMFG SHE RA?? IS THAT U?? - BOW AND GLIMMER BEING OKAY?? MAYBE - Etherians really are wilding out here - YESSS THEY JOINING THE REBELLION - "Maybe we'll never be friends like we used to be."  Glimmer...I love her sm - "I can't just leave her there. I have to try." Adora actually cares so much about her!! and I love Glimmer being supportive wow we love a queen! - THE BEST FRIEND SQUAD IS BACK TOGETHER!! LETS GOO - "She-Ra is back." Swift Wind is annoying but thank you. thank you for saying that horse.

I literally threw my hoodie across the room and forgot that I did that wow lmao

Episode 5 — Save the Cat

- My friend who's ahead me said wait for episode 5 now I'm fucking S H OO K - this episode name has me shook I can't - its WRITTEN BY NOELLE?? WE'RE FUCKED - I love Wrong Hordak SM what an idiot - Catradora really is gonna be canon wow - WTAF IS THAT SHE IS NOT MY CATRA SHE IS A CLONE her hair tho?? kinda nice - the way HP said "your Catra." like low-key he said gay rights - "You broke my heart. And he has made me whole again." - "We both know I don't matter"  and "you're and idiot" "I know" THESE TWO ARE MADE FOR EACH OTHER - SHE JUMPED OFF A CLIFF FOR HER - the way she's holding her?? so soft - SHE RA IS LOOKING FLY -- and is she taller?? - "You miscalculated" YES QUEEN I LOVE HER. THAT WHOLE FIGHT SCENE WAS AMAZING - FuCK HORDEP PRIME - Darla is the best Light Hope SUX - the "Hey, Adora" was SO SOFT IM SO HAPPY

That episode really hiT different Catradora is DEFINITELY canon EVERYONE SAY THANK YOU NOELLE

Episode 6 - Taking Control

- Adora. Chill. - Catra's trauma...wow - honestly I have SO MUCH TO SAY and so little at all. - The ending w Catra joining was so cute and all the Catradora interactions are SENDING ME this is the development I need - "Adora. Stay." MY HEART - thank fuck that chip is gone YAY - Entrapta and Catra making up? Catra saying "Thank you and I'm sorry" her least favourite words -- characters DEVELOPMENT - The way Catra blushed when Adora transformed GIRL YOURE GAY - SHERAS POWER IS TOO MUCH SLAY GIRL - Horde Prime FucK off challenge I hate him - Micah tryna be a father figure? cute - the endING FUCK WHY WOULD THEY DO THAT SPINNERALLA??? POOR NETOSSA

okay but where tf is DT, KYLE, LONNIE AND ROGELIO??

my mum is so tired of me screaming lmaoo

Episode 7 — Perils Of Peekabloo

- Catra just SAT on Adora's lap the PDA is unmatched - We love a filler wow - we literally can't trust anyone this shit sucks - SCORFUMA STANS STAY WINNING - Mermista and Seahawk kinda cute tho (the  heart eyes) - DT I KNEW IT   - CASH KITTEN? EYE—JUST SAY SUGAR MOMMA AND GO - NETOSSA DOESN'T DESERVE THIS - MERMISTA TO - EVERYONE is chipped WTF - DT is a theatre gay through and through   - THEY'RE FUCKED WE'RE FUCKED - NOOOO SCORPIA 😭😭😭 - "I'm the muscle, remember?" - SCORPIA'S POWER, HER REACH, IT'S AMAZING - everything is going downhill FAST - "Happy Anniversary" EYE—😭😭😭😭😭

well that sucked What the fuck we gone do now?

Episode 8 - Shot in the Dark

- The soft smile Catra gave Adora while teasing? love that - loving this new squad - the wAY HER TAIL FLUFFED UP SHES SO SCARED MAN - Wrong Hordak is my main g - the LAUGHING!! THE BLUSHING!! EVERYONE CAN SMELL THE GAY TENSION - omg Catra being the brains of the operation?? yes please - "Catra's first mission" THEY'RE SO OBNOXIOUS I LOVE THEM - "I'm going to kill your friends." "Please don't." we are ASCENDING - Casta? Strike her down anyway please 🙏 - Adora is SO WHIPPED the way she blushed at Catra making the door - "It's such a cute sneeze" BOW KNOWS IT CATRA IS CUTE AND THATS THE TEA - literallyyyy I hate SW GTFO CHALLENGE get OFF my screen 😡 - CATRA WHY DID YOU LUNGE AT THAT THING?? - OMFG MAGICAT?? (Nope dumb bitch) - "I'm coming!" "Hurry." - "I'm sorry. I got angry. It's something I'm working on" ADORA GLOWED AND SAID "You are?" WE LOVE SELF GROWTH AHH - It was Catra's hand OMFG IN THE TRAILER - Adora and cat thing being magic? we love it - MELOG IS SO CUTE and Catra can talk to it?? wowow - they love taking strays lmao - Wrong Hordak's character arc is the best one in the show - CATRA HAS AN IDEA?? YES - Preach Casta shut Weaver up - "That about sums it up, yes." I love them as a team - the hand holding? so cutee Catra don't pretend you're not whipped - oml Glimmer kissing Catra before Adora? EYE— Glitra shippers gonna be so happy at that one moment lmaoo - THEY'RE HOMEEEE

ahhh we're getting close to the end nooo

Episode 9 —An ill Wind

- oh god oh god - Catra is so badass with Melog i LOVE HER EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL  - having to fight your own wife? that shit sucks - Erelandia? it's free - omg HP is angry asfff - FROSTA CHILL SHE PUNCHED HER HARD - Adora and Catra are soft 🥺 that's all I have to say

Episode 10 — Return to the Fright Zone

- omg are we gonna see Kyle?? Lonnie? Rogelio?? (also nope, stupid hoe) - okay but Netossa getting screentime? YES PLEASE - I love the intro sm ahhhh - also her knowing everyone's weakness? love that shit - ouch Perfuma ouch didn’t have to go so hard on Catra and YET - omg I forgot Bow's dads existed - "Mostly bad memories" 😔😔😔 - competitive gfs for the win - Catra FLEW tho WOW Scorpia is STRONK - the dad jokes are immaculate - "I'm working is being a better friend. That has to count for something right?" - "We don't throw tanks at our friends" sis you don't give flowers to your them at this current time either - "why did I get stuck with the water Princess?" Catra...baby I love you - omg there's a fail safe THANK FUCK I was legit speechless - "There's real power in love and friendship" preACH IT GIRLIE - SCORPIA FIGHT IT YESSS - legit forgot Spinny and Netossa were fighting lmao oof - FINALLY ANGST OVER THE WIVES ARE BACK - omg THE PAN TO ADORA ABOUT BEING VULNERABLE AHHHH - Perfuma is Catra's therapist that's my headcanon - OMFG I FORGOT ABOUT SW FUCK SHIT CATRA BABY IM SORRY

damn I'm stressed out

Episode 11 — Failsafe

- Weaver STFU challenge - them taking about their abuse? we love to see - "We— I could really use your help" KILL ME NOW THEY'RE TOO MUCH - "Not because I like you" she says SMILING - Melog is Catra's affectionate side prove me wrong - Stan Entrapta for clear skin - SW doesn't deserve rights (as per usual) - DONT TOUCH HER BITCH LITERALLYYYY WHYYY - and now She Ra is glitching?? fuck - Catra is so jumpy eye— "Trust Me" MY HEART SBSBDB - Weaver really called her a DISTURBANCE STFU 💀💀💀 - Entrapta and bird horse ftw what a tag team - OMG NO BE CAREFUL - "Did you just jump in fire to save me?" SHE WAS SO SMUG - can SW burn like... now? - "It's none of your business" LITERALLY BUTT OUT  - "Catra, she distracts you, confuses you." WEAVER I FUCKING HATE YOU SM I FUCKING I WILL PUNCH MY SCREEN - Entrapdak being a thing? I do not know how to feel - "Your imperfections are beautiful."  I am.... conflicted - SW doesn't deserve screen time - Catra is an i no cap (I genuinely have no clue what I meant so sorry about that) - i think the fuck not - this episode is so stressful - Catra saving Adora >>>>>>>>> - what an awful reunion for Glimmer damn - "It doesn't always have to be you!" IKR IT SHOULD BE WEAVER - fuck dark magic fuck it all - Catra's upset?? no my baby 🥺 - this whole episode is just traumatising - Adora's heart do be glowing - Catra's LEAVING?? why?? - "What do you want Adora?" - MY HEART BEEN BROKE SO MANY TIMES I DONT KNOW WHAT TO BELIEVE 😭😭 - omg this time instead of Adora leaving it's Catra (you are a dumbass DUH) - that H U R T S - ADORA TELL HER YEs QUEEN

omg HEART NEXT???

Episode 12 — Heart Part 1

- I am not prepared for this - Adora...baby I'm so sorry - Glimbow moment with a banjo?? that was cute - Adora really is a party popper - "Adora doesn't want me. Not like I want her." AND THAT'S ON LESBIANISM BUT ALSO FUCKING OUCH  - but really Catra...do you really think Adora doesn't want you? girl are youb B L I N D?? - Wrong Hordak is MY GUY - Stan the rebellion for clear skin - NOOO WHAT THE FUCK MY HEART DON'TPLAY WITH ME LIKE THAT THEY NEARLY KISSED AND IT WAS A FUCKING SIMULATION - real Catra be CAREFUL - "We have to warn Adora" YES SIS WARN YOUR GF  - "I thought I could make my own destiny" U STILL CAN SIS - I'm scared I'm fucking scared - my HEART IS BEATINGG FASTT - I really hate Horde Prime uhhhhhhhgg - for once in your sorry life do something good Weaver jfc - "I can't leave her behind again" - BEST FRIEND SQUAD + MELOG YES - "Bow, I love you." GLIMBOW IS BACK ON AHHH - BUT AT WHAT COST??? (literally what am I saying??) - "You deserve love too." AND THAT'S ON PERIODT - Glimmer coming in clutch!! - Mermista and Seahawk do be cute tho - Micah is actually the worst rn wow - "Goodbye, my oldest enemy" CATRA COME QUICK AHH

the last episode....I'm not ready to say goodbye

Episode 13 — Heart Part 2

- ofc this is written by Noelle - "Hey, Adora" MY HEART - "I'll catch up okay? Get to the heart." - SW ACTUALLY DIED?? THANK YOU MY GIRLS CAN HEAL NOW

andd that's as far as I got before freaking the fuck out with everything that was happening onscreen but THE CATRADORA KISS WAS EVERYTHING and the ending was perfect 🥺💖

—

Thank you Crew-Ra, Noelle for making such a beautiful and heartwarming show, this will be remembered for years to come because what this show did was incredible and unlike anything I've ever watched.

[felicityfiction]

[bulletproof glass part 4] part 3

a/n: its 5am. i needed a study break. this is terrible. im very disappointed in myself but also not sure if i can put anything out thats better. i have failed, please dont hate me :(

god, do they even teach them how to shoot?

san smirks, easily dodging a badly aimed bullet from a poorly hidden sniper. not really a sniper at all, if you ask him. just someone too cowardly to come down and face the action on the ground.

weakness.

in the chaos of a building carpark, there are guns blazing and shouts echoing, the occasional yell of pain or shattering of glass as these terribly trained excuses of henchmen hit a car instead of their intended human target.

it’s music to san’s ears.

to his left, he registers seonghwa, barrelling towards him with a wholehearted intention to get him into a car and to safety, but san is just starting to have fun.

he takes down two guys who have at least a foot on him, but he barely breaks a sweat. adrenaline is pumping through his veins, and he thinks that maybe he doesn’t have to smoke tonight to be able to get high.

this is his drug. san is addicted to the danger of it all. it’s messy and wonderful, a dance that is ingrained into san’s brain and burned into his muscle from years of first hand experience. choi san is talented, and he’s about to show it.

he sees seonghwa veer sharply to his right, and he spares a glance in his direction. just in time to see seonghwa gun down two guys who were surrounding hongjoong, trying to take him down. the leader was to be captured alive, no doubt, to be used as leverage. if his father was here, these guys would be all over him like hyenas to a carcass. but he isn’t, content to let san and seonghwa handle tonight’s minor matters.

he’s mine.

the words thrum in his ears, fuelling his slightly fatigued muscles to keep going until all their enemies were down. he was the next in line to inherit the choi name, and he sure as hell was going to make his name known to everyone in the underground.

and perhaps the child in him still preens under his father’s praise, and he’s greedy for more.

but san is amused by the sight of seonghwa fumbling in his attempt to get to hongjoong, his usual grace lost in his worry. he almost reaches out to hongjoong, then freezes and recoils like hongjoong at shot him. san feels a stab of pity, but also a brief inkling of scorn

this is what affection does to you.

hongjoong had come with few guards, despite knowing that there was a high chance that this deal would go south. perhaps he trusted san more than he let on, or he thought that san had a bigger target on his back, and he would be able to escape unscathed if it came down to it

or, san thinks, maybe he knows someone here will die to protect him.

a hand comes flying out of nowhere, barely missing san’s face, and san whips around faster than lightning. he grabs the wrist, and is about to twist and snap it when he registers the face in front of him. a smile curls onto his face.

“we’re allies here, did you forget? how can it be acceptable to try and take me out?”

“wasn’t trying to take you out. distracted. person shooting. wanted to get your attention.” yunho is speaking in breathless pants, sweat beading on his forehead. he grabs san and tugs, and san finds himself going willingly. he lets himself get pushed behind a pillar, as yunho scans for more aggressive men in black.

there’s a feeling san can’t pinpoint blooming in his chest, and he shoves it away, letting his god awful flirtatious nature come up as a defence.

“so sweet of you, darling. but you look more tired than me. i’d have been perfectly fine, but i appreciate the sentiment.”

yunho doesn’t realise he’s stilll holding san’s wrist, too busy being on the lookout.

“shut up.” he scowls

san sees a brief release of tension in yunho’s shoulders when he spots hongjoong safe, a few meters away surrounded by the remainder of his guards.

“you should go join them, sweetheart. it’s time for you to flee.”

yunho’s eyes snap towards him, and he angrily spits, “we’re not fleeing, you bastard.”

san wants to laugh again, because infruriating yunho is so, so enjoyable. “i didn’t mean anything. they’re all gone, anyway. we won. no point staying around for the cleanup.” he lifts his wrist to yunho’s eyes, and they widen exponentially. yunho drops his wrist and steps back, putting some distance between him and san. san decides he preferred it when yunho was pressed against him.

yunho makes to walk away towards a gesturing hongjoong, but san’s the one to reach out this time.

“thank you, yunho. i appreciate it.” yunho seems surprised by the sincereity that laces san’s words, but he quickly reminds himself that san is more than a proficient liar. he pushes san’s hand off his wrist, suddenly wishing he hadn’t tried to help.

stupid, stupid yunho.

“and don’t worry, baby. you always have my attention.”

and there it is, classic san. can’t have a conversation without dropping some kind of comment that made yunho’s skin crawl. yunho flinches, and walks away. san is staring after him, his lips upturned.

yunho picks his way through the bodies littered on the ground, trying to ignore both the vast amounts of blood, and the way that his ears are burning.

if hongjoong notices how red he is, he presumes that it’s from the physical exertion. he’s scanning yunho for injuries, relieved to find none. regardless, he pushes yunho towards the car, ready to take him away from everything and shelter him as best he can.

he shouldn’t have brought him here in the first place.

hongjoong can’t help the deep tug in his gut that compels him to look around once more before stepping into the car.

seonghwa is rushing towards san, and san is smiling so broadly it disturbs hongjoong. he’s certain that san is a psychopath, or at least someone who enjoys witnessing pain. or maybe he’s so desensitized that this has all become a game for him.

either way, hongjoong darts his eyes down and gets into the car. he pretends that the relief flooding his chest is for himself, for yunho and for his other men. not for the bodyguard of his rival gang leader, who just so happened to perhaps have saved his life.

fuck this.

hongjoong is absolutely fucking screwed.

yunho spends the same car ride trying to forget the deep voice echoing in his ears and the hand around his wrist. he’s all too aware that he was frantically searching for san the entire time the fight was happening, barely registering his members. he should feel guilty, he knows, and he berates himself fiercely.

why yunho, why? he’s a sadistic monster, he could have killed you and called it an accident!

but somehow, yunho can’t bring himself to regret that he threw himself in front of a guy that could very well be holding a gun to his temple in the near future.

yunho is also, absolutely fucking screwed

“he tried to help me, hwa. isn’t that so cute? i could’ve taken all of them blindfolded, but it’s still adorable.”

seonghwa purses his lips, a sharp pang striking a chord in his heart.

san is sitting on his desk, swinging his legs back and forth as he recounts the night to him, nevermind that seonghwa was supposed to be the one delivering the report.

“that’s the first time someone besides me has done that for you, san.” seonghwa says quietly, more to himself than to san. but his charge, his friend, hears it anyway.

“i’m attractive, hwa. what can i say? you tried to play hero too. good job on that, by the way.”

seonghwa flinches at the reminder. it was too close for comfort, the way hongjoong had been a split second from being overpowered, and seonghwa had moved before he had time to think.

“i’m sorry for getting distracted.” he had failed. seonghwa was supposed to protect san, yet he had some kind of messed up tunnel vision and sixth sense that led him to jump to the defence of someone he isn’t even supposed to associate with-

“don’t apologise. i’m a better fighter than you, or him. i didn’t need it.”

i forgive you. i understand. don’t worry, you did the right thing.

that’s how they communicate. with hidden meanings and the hope that the other party understands.

in spite of everything that went down, seonghwa’s frantic about one thing, and one thing above all.

it absolutely terrifies him how choi san is whistling a happy tune from his lips recounting the way jung yunho had tried to press him into a wall for his own safety. san chalks it all up to nothing, but seonghwa sees more. san isn’t just amused, he’s happy.

he’s happy that jung yunho had tried to save him.

it’s mortifying, seeing this unknown emotion on san. seonghwa knows how to deal with an angry san, a drunk san and an indifferent san. seonghwa knows san.

but seonghwa has never seen san care. and it sure as hell feels like san is starting to care.

“would you have done it?” he whispers, and san trails off, narrowing his eyes at him.

“what are you talking about?”

“would you have jumped in front of a gun to save him?” seonghwa bites his lip. please, please say something snarky and cocky and arrogant.

“i’d just shoot the source of danger, hwa. have you lost your touch? can’t protect someone if i’m dead, now can i? remember that next time, i doubt hongjoong would want to see you die in front of him.”

seonghwa’s ears are ringing.

protect someone? san, since when have you ever wanted to protect someone? everyone is disposable to you, no? why him? why now?

but seonghwa swallows all his words, and san continues on his painfully oblivious humming. he can’t even tell that this emotion is new and different. he can’t tell that his mind is drifting to a hand gripping his wrist, and the pressure of another body pressed against his.

word of the day: endearment. maybe san would do good to learn some new vocabulary, so he can put a label to that weird sensation in his chest, and his burning desire to see jung yunho again.

maybe, san would come to his senses. seonghwa can only hope.

[el-dibidibidorado1]

Demon Bite

Prologue

Avengers x reader

A/N: This is new and I'm excited! But there is some blood and gore that I have always wanted to write in my stories and I think that now is my chance. So I hope you enjoy and that this fic is a success if not I will learn to try again.

Hitchhiking and stealing a couple of bucks from people was my lifestyle, for a while. Well, ever since I've been solo. Inside I know it's a bad thing but its survival.

A couple of bucks gives me a nice hotel, with a semi soft bed, a hot shower and sometimes a meal to fill me up for a week or two..oh and free breakfast. Talking about a meal....

"You were supposed to get the menthol cigarettes not this shit!" A hard smack echoed throughout the almost empty lobby. The tears and bruises made my blood boil and stomach growl.

Gotcha.

After shoving, I'm guessing his wife into the room he looked around. I just waved my hand and winked at him. His dirty smile and smell made my nose burn.

"What room?" He spoke loud enough for me to hear.

"16" I said giving him another wink and walked away making sure his eyes were on me. Fuckin pig.

Before getting my stuff ready to leave right away i decide to call the lobby.

"Hello blackbird hotel, how may I assist?" Perfect it's the lady.

"Yes, do you mind coming to room 16 It sounds as If there is something in the vents and it's kinda disturbing my sleep."

"I will send some-"

"No! "I didn't mean to shout. But I had to, i wanted it to go to plan.

"I would want a woman to come, usually men somehow think that we are dramatic"

Finally she agreed and I panicked trying to find a way to tell her that I was going to kill the bastard of her husband.

While splashing some water on my face a knock on the door made me slip on some water that I had dropped.

"Coming" I opened the door to find the poor lady with a now purple eye. I moved aside letting her pass, then I heard it. A soft pitter patter, this lady is with child.

"So where is the noise coming from" I rubbed my hands and offered her some water and asked for her to take a seat.

"There is no noise..." she stayed quiet and I noticed her breathing speed up.

"I'm not going to do anything to you, but, do you love your partner?" A tear rolled down her cheek and shook her head.

"I fuckin hate him; I wish he where gone" she drank the water and a huge wave of relief washed over me.

"What if I can grant you that wish?" Her eyes sparked. This woman was desperate, and she despised him.

"How?" I placed my hand on hers and told her not to worry.

Another knock made her jump in fear. This man had done some damage to her.

"Stay put" I said and opened the door to find the same man. Surprisingly he showered and got ready for a fuck that will never happen.

"Hi" he said showing his same nasty teeth. I stepped aside and let him in.

"So- what the fuck are you doing here?!" He yelled

"I'm doing her a favor" I twisted his shoulder until I felt pressure. He yelled and continued cursing.

"Shut up" I said.

"You bi-" I snapped his shoulder making him cry in pain.

"Kneel" he continued cursing scaring her more.

"I said kneel!" I let my nail grow and stabbed his collar bone keeping my finger in.

He finally got on his knees and each time he cursed at her I would dig deeper into the stab. From the corner of my eye i noticed her shiver in fear.

"Sweetheart, stand up" I said keeping him still.

She stood in front of him but I held him back from lashing out at her.

"Apologize to her" I whispered into his ear.

"NO" I dug little more deeper until I touched his collarbone and snaped it.

"Apologize to her!" I said feeling the sharpness of my teeth gently scrape my lip.

"I'm sorry....please stop I'm sorry, im sorry, im sorry" he said making the lady cry once more. I finally managed to break the man.

"I hope that you suffer. You made my life miserable and I'm glad this child isn't yours you fuckin bastard" a harsh slap across his face made him quiet.

"Rot In hell" she rubbed her red hand walked out leaving us.

A smile appeared on my face.

"Aww is someone upset" I teased.

"You whore!" He pulled out a pocket knife with his uninjured arm and stabbed my leg and side. Angrily I finished breaking his collarbone and with force I pushed him across the room hitting the small dining table.

"Ow" I said taking out the knife and tossing it. The fear in his eyes is what I needed it made them taste tender.

"How is that possible?" The quiver in his voice was satisfying. Racing towards him I lifted him up and pinned him to the wall.

"Anything is possible" he began crying and shaking like a child. My teeth became sharper and nails longer ready to pierce his neck. In the reflection of his eyes I found mine blacked out.

"I need you hopeless" I growled and sank my teeth into him savoring the red liquid.

"What else do you have in store for me?" The color began leaving him. Dropping his body I grab the blade and open him up. His screamed echoed. I for sure knew that i had to leave tonight but i found satisfaction by this. His scream, the fear in his eyes and the rapid pumping of the remaining blood in his body. In seconds his organs rose and his eyes where about to pop out of its sockets.

"Hmm, liver is good " my hand circled inside him finding the main source of vitamins, facts. His breathing speed up soon as I pulled it out.

"But my favorite is the.." I forced my hand into his chest pulling out the juice box.

"....the heart" I licked my fingers and made sure that was the last thing he saw. Soon as I dug my teeth into his heart I felt my joints crack, skin tighten, and fatigue vanish. My energy had came back. My only way of surviving.

Once I had finished the most important parts the same sudden wave of disgust and emotions washed over me.

I ate people to live, but I only ate the evil, removing them from this earth.

I decided to eat more since I didn't know when my full belly would come again, regular food only helped so little. I cleaned up my mess and disposed of the almost empty carvis into a rundown fire pit they had in the back, before I showered.

"Hello?" I went to pay when the lady came out with red puffy eyes, i also didn't miss the small fear in them.

"You look different" I said

"So do you, more younger..." she opened her mouth but shut it right a way.

"About what happened-" she frantically shook her hands.

"I promise! I won't tell anyone!" I chuckled and i told her to relax as i pulled out some money from a wallet.

"I know you won't. And i expect you to take care of yourself and that child.." i pointed at her swollen belly.

"If not, i will know and i will take the child away and give it a better life." I gave her the room key and got ready to leave.

I didn't mean what i said. Its just intimation, to get them to become better people.

"I will and thank you!" She said as i walked out.

"Sure" i scratched my neck.

"Any big citys around here?"

"New York is north two hours away" new york? Ive never been there.

I left without another word. Walking out with a duffle bag, i looked around for a new ride. Thats when is noticed a blue 18 wheeler in the parking lot.

"Lost, lady?" A male accent caught me off guard.

"Yes. Um i was wondering if that blue beauty yours?" I noticed that he is nice elderly mexican man, with a mustache and tinted glasses.

"Si. Where are you going?" We began walking towards his 18 wheeler.

"Two hours North" he nodded and took a sip of his coffee.

"That is where i have to go. I give you ride." His accent made me smile. I nodded and hopped on the passenger side. He had a kind heart but a piece was dark...i could sense it. We spoke and the two hours seemed like 30 minutes. 

"Thanks for the ride Eduardo" i hopped off with one of burritos that his wife had made for him.

"Anytime. You know.." i took a bite out of the burrito.

"You remind me of one of my grandchildren."  I choked on my food.

"Youngest one."

We bid our goodbyes and hoped that we crossed paths someday.

I turned and found myself in the middle of a park full of people. Now that i am miles away i could probably start a new life.

[f4liveblogarchives]

Fantastic Four Vol 1 #209 & #210

Hello! If you clicked the “John Bryne” tag, well, this is his first stint as penciler. If you want to get to the stuff where he’s taken over the mag entirely, feel free to skip to #232. I’ll drop a link here once I’ve written that issue up.

Sun Sep 8 2019 [01:43 PM] Wack'd: ...huh

[01:44 PM] maxwellelvis: HERBIE! [01:44 PM] Wack'd: I knew HERBIE eventually made his way to the comics but this is a fast turnaround [01:44 PM] maxwellelvis: 😃 [01:44 PM] Wack'd: Also, yes: adorable [01:44 PM] Umbramatic: ben you are indeed cute [01:44 PM] Bocaj: .................... what would A-type be? [01:45 PM] Wack'd: A control freak [01:45 PM] Bocaj: fair [01:45 PM] Bocaj: ALSO: "I was out of town when the contracts needed to be signed" [01:45 PM] maxwellelvis: And much more tolerable when he's not taking Johnny's spot on the team in a cartoon where Reed defeats Magneto with "A WOODEN GUN?!" [01:45 PM] Bocaj: i'm besides myself. What a great stupid handwave [01:46 PM] Wack'd: The real explication is that Marvel had already licensed Johnny to a different company for a live-action film that never materialized [01:46 PM] Bocaj: hahah [01:46 PM] Bocaj: marvel's rights nonsense has always been nonsense [01:46 PM] maxwellelvis: Hard to believe that before She-Hulk and Deadpool, it was the Fantastic Four that were the Marvel heroes who prodded at the fourth wall the most. [01:47 PM] Wack'd:

Ben: Just tell me this, Stretch: he gonna talk back ta me like that cartoon show creep? Reed: HERBIE is a functioning analog computer. I didn't design a robot with a sense of humor.

[01:47 PM] Wack'd: :( [01:47 PM] Umbramatic: pfft [01:47 PM] maxwellelvis: They've always had a touch of that, as writers can't resist using the Four's status as celebrity figures as an opportunity to comment on the comics industry and merchandising and stuff like that. [01:48 PM] maxwellelvis: Like the probably infamous Free Comic Book Day comic [01:48 PM] Wack'd: hahaahahahahaha yaaaaaay

[01:49 PM] Umbramatic: rip ben [01:49 PM] maxwellelvis: Oh no, he's gone rogue! [01:49 PM] Wack'd: And so the Four and HERBIE set out to find Galactus [01:49 PM] Wack'd: The only being powerful enough to stop Sphinx [01:49 PM] maxwellelvis: SPHINX! [01:49 PM] Wack'd: You might remember the High Evolutionary turned him into a giant brain [01:49 PM] Wack'd: So this'll be tricky [01:50 PM] Wack'd: R'Klll's evil plan was just to shoot him in the back? Kind of an anticlimax

[01:51 PM] maxwellelvis: Couldn't have happened to a nicer guy. [01:51 PM] Umbramatic: oof [01:52 PM] Wack'd: I love funhouse mirror space travel

[01:52 PM] Umbramatic: WE'VE REACHED LUDICROUS SPEED [01:53 PM] maxwellelvis: MY BRAINS ARE GOING INTO MY FEET! [01:54 PM] Wack'd: "Oh, Johnny. Just do what I did--take a hiatus until a new writer shows up, half-forgets why you left, and pretend you had a bunch of character development off-panel!"

[01:55 PM] Bocaj: Pfft [01:55 PM] Bocaj: Also Galactus is a giant brain now? [01:55 PM] Wack'd: Also, our first big time-retcon--Johnny was a junior in high school when the team formed [01:56 PM] Wack'd: But now he was "barely out of high school", bumping his timeline up two years [01:56 PM] Wack'd: @Bocaj : Yes. [See issue #175] Though I doubt it's made him any smarter [01:56 PM] Wack'd: This is literally the first time the Sargasso of Space has been mentioned but sure

[01:57 PM] maxwellelvis: Watch out for Space Russians testing new weapons, and for Space Ghost Pirates [01:57 PM] Wack'd: Ben: So this is where the Battlestar Galactica went to die. [01:58 PM] Bocaj: There was something like the sargasso of space in a silver surfer book I read [01:58 PM] Bocaj: But there was a lot of dust and stuff so it was really hard to navigate [01:58 PM] Bocaj: Like a nebula but weirder [01:59 PM] Bocaj: Englehart Surfer [02:00 PM] Wack'd: So it turns out there's a survivor on one of these ships--a guard on a prison transport. He dies almost immediately and begs the Four to stop the escaped prisoners. Ben takes it personal because the guard looks like this

[02:01 PM] Wack'd: "I owe it to him--one monster to another!" [02:01 PM] Wack'd: Never mind that he species probably just looks like that [02:01 PM] Umbramatic: "rude" [02:01 PM] Wack'd: Oh hey the criminals are all also this species [02:02 PM] Wack'd: So there's no thematic point here at all, just dragging out the plot [02:04 PM] Wack'd: One of the criminals makes a break for the Four's ship, but when the Four catch up with him he's already dead. HERBIE denies responsibility, arousing Ben's suspicions. [02:04 PM] Wack'd: Ah, here's the point. It was secretly a Johnny story all along!

[02:06 PM] Wack'd: So hey, incidentally, a thing I should mention: [02:06 PM] Wack'd: This is John Bryne's first Fantastic Four issue! [02:06 PM] maxwellelvis: Huh [02:07 PM] Wack'd: Wolfman's still writing and Bryne won't be taking over that role for another couple of years [02:07 PM] Wack'd: But it's interesting to note [02:08 PM] Bocaj: oh shiz [02:08 PM] Wack'd: There'll be some stopovers at guest artists but he's gonna be our main dude for the next year or so, pencils-wise

Sun Sep 8 2019 [02:09 PM] Wack'd: A day has passed since last issue [02:09 PM] Wack'd: We're taking this ticking clock with the Four aging pretty seriously [02:11 PM] Wack'd: So they're trapped in a meteor storm. Sue and Ben are batting away the meteors. Reed decides they need to jump back to warp but Ben figures they won't make it without him defending the ship and refuses to come back inside [02:11 PM] Wack'd: So Johnny does the only thing he can think of--shoots himself out the airlock without a helmet, forcing Ben to rescue him [02:11 PM] Wack'd: These guys are pretty dumb sometimes [02:12 PM] Bocaj: ���� [02:12 PM] Umbramatic: oh [02:13 PM] Wack'd: Behold: the only accurate definition of a parsec in sci-fi history. (I googled it)

[02:13 PM] Umbramatic: amazing [02:13 PM] Bocaj: "My calculations must be accurate. Otherwise we're fucked" "Thats... thats not actually a guarantee" [02:14 PM] Wack'd: So, uh [02:14 PM] Wack'd: Apparently eating Poppup caused Galactus to have enough organic matter to rebuild his body? I guess? [02:14 PM] Wack'd: So that's solved [02:15 PM] Wack'd: In the time it took to find Galactus' ship another day passed. We're at 29 hours [02:15 PM] Bocaj: 😐 [02:15 PM] Wack'd: Reed's hair is getting greyer but besides that everyone seems fine [02:16 PM] Wack'd: Women live longer than men. It would make more sense for literally anyone else to get fatigued

[02:18 PM] Wack'd: Galactus refuses to acknowledge them even when they throw stuff at him [02:18 PM] Wack'd: So they go for Plan Curly

[02:19 PM] Wack'd: FREE ALL THE ANIMALS IN THE ZOO [02:19 PM] maxwellelvis: HAHAHAHHAHAHA! [02:19 PM] maxwellelvis: They forgot the tiger stripes [02:20 PM] Wack'd: I dig the hell out of these creature designs

[02:21 PM] Wack'd: Also Sue privately exposits that Storms always die young which is why she'll be the first to go. Fine [02:22 PM] Wack'd: So! They get the attention of Galactus [02:22 PM] Umbramatic: i also dig these creature designs [02:23 PM] Wack'd: And Reed cuts a deal: if Galactus helps them defeat Sphinx, Reed will release him from his vow to never again attack Earth [02:23 PM] Umbramatic: oh [02:23 PM] Wack'd: Galactus agrees, on the condition they retrieve the new Herald Galactus has picked out [02:24 PM] Wack'd: And he teleports them away to complete this task [02:25 PM] Bocaj: FFS REED [02:25 PM] Bocaj: Apparently Dan Slott forgot this story because he has Reed call Galactus out for attacking Earth when he promised not to [02:25 PM] Bocaj: And Galactus is like 'fuck you' [02:25 PM] Wack'd: Maybe that vow gets remade later [02:26 PM] Bocaj: Maybe [02:26 PM] Bocaj: I pity anyone that tries to seriously uphold all continuity [02:26 PM] Bocaj: Its tangled nonsense [02:28 PM] Wack'd: Anyway Galactus is also like "okay this is obvious bullshit and you're gonna stop me from eating Earth again but I have some pride bound up in this so I'm just glad I have the opportunity to try again"

[their-name-is-morgan]

Ok b so like, I'm gonna try to make this sort of specific, I live for some angst and I live for Abba so like.... Imagine Abba being in one of those days where he just feels like garbage , but then his nice softie s/o visits him and cheers him up and gives him luv bc uwuwuwu. im so awkward at writing this, anyways, it's a scenario if thats ok with u b, and the s/o is a female.

AAAAH B I tried my best to make this turn out decent!! I feel like Leo is extremely OOC and there might be some mistakes here and there, but it’s late and I’m tired...so I’ll fix this in the morning! ;;

I hope you enjoy it anyway, ilysm❤

Il loro segreto

Leone Abbacchio x Fem!Reader❤

Everyone has bad days, and everyone faces them in a different way. There are people like Bruno: he would try his best to help other people overcome their struggles, and seeing their smiling face would make him feel better in an instant. There are people like Fugo: he would allow himself to have a day off, and he’d spend that day doing his favourite things, talking to his favourite people, or even staying alone. And then there are people like Abbacchio.

Leone was a man of few words, he would talk when necessary, and he wasn’t the nicest member of the gang. His face appeared to be in an eternal scowl, with his dark, thin eyebrows furrowed and his lips rarely lifting upwards. One would think that he was a strong, confident man whose only emotions were anger and disgust, but there’s always more to a person than what they let the others see.

Abbacchio was like any other person: some of his days were happy, other ones boring, and other ones bad, upsetting days. On the latter he would isolate himself and even refuse to get out of his bed, too mentally exhausted to interact with other people. He would push them away, and then he’d feel guilty about it. His lips would quiver and his eyes would water, but he’d hold it in.

And that day was one of those days.

(Name) exhaled, her eyes fixed on the last message he had sent: “See you at 9” with a black heart at the end. ‘Edgy’ she thought with a chuckle, but the small smile on her face disappeared as soon as it came. They had agreed on meeting quite early in the morning and, when she noticed that it was pouring outside but his last access remained the same as the previous night’s, she had guessed that the rain wouldn’t have been a problem for him either.

But after an hour of waiting for his arrival in front of the smallest, saddest bookstore in town, she came to a sudden realization: what if something was wrong?

Was he okay? Was the rest of the gang okay? Was her phone being dumb and not showing her his true last messages? She needed to know. She was about to stand up and open her umbrella when she noticed a notification from a different chat: Bruno had just texted her.

‘Would you mind coming over? I know this is sudden, but there’s somebody here who needs you.’ The text read, and her expression twisted into one of concern. It wasn’t the first time that she received a text like that, from either the Capo –whom she considered one of her closest friends- or another one of the guys, and it was not a pleasant thing to read.

She didn’t even bother to reply, instead she started walking towards the Passione residence, which was not that far away from that spot. The rain didn’t stop, making her almost trip at least twice along the way, but she was determined to see her lover’s face and hold him as close as possible.

It didn’t take that long before three knocks on the door snapped Bruno out of his trance; he stood up and made his way to the front door, abandoning the crossword puzzled he had been trying to complete for the past forty minutes on the wooden table.

He slowly opened the door to reveal his friend, umbrella in her right hand and phone in the other, her eyebrows slightly furrowed but a polite smile still present on her face. He motioned to come in and guided her to the couch, where they both sat down;

“So, what happened?” she asked, fidgeting with her hands. He let out a sigh,

“I...will keep it short. You know how Leone can get and now I know he needs extra support that I can’t give him. But please remember, cara; if this is too much for you, if he somehow hurts you with his words or actions...” he paused, cautiously choosing what to say next, “It’s not worth it. He is my friend, but you are too and I wouldn’t want you to think that I agree with everything he says or does.”

She carefully listened, her expression concentrated. She warmly smiled as he finished talking and took his larger hands in hers, grateful for having such a caring and honest friend.

“Bruno, I will follow your advice if anything happens. But I’m pretty sure it won’t,” she reassured him, and he nodded and returned the smile, “Now, he hasn’t left his room has he?”

“He’s been in there since yesterday night. He’d making all of us very worried, (Name).” He confessed, his tone of voice sincere. The girl could only nod and direct her gaze on the flight of stairs leading up to the second floor, where the bedrooms were located.

 Unmade bed, window shut, blankets and dirty clothes lazily piled up in a corner of the barely lit room. The smell not bad enough to be unbearable, but enough to make one’s nose wrinkle. The pitter patter of the rain soothed him, but unnerved him at the same time. Was it even possible to feel in such a way?

He sat there, intently staring at the blank, boring wall as if it was the most interesting thing. What else could he have done in his state after all? With his headphones too far away to reach and the overwhelming fatigue that didn’t seem willing to leave him anytime soon, he could only lose heart and sit there, with his back against the bed’s headboard.

His almost lifeless gaze fell upon his phone, which had been resting on his nightstand since the previous night. A feeling of guilt struck him at the thought that he hadn’t shown up for his and (Name)’s date, his chest tightening and a lump forming in his throat. No, he couldn’t cry. What was the point of crying anyway? His eyes alarmingly watered, salty tears threatening to roll down his pale cheeks; he tried to focus on breathing, when a soft, almost inaudible knock made his grip on the thin blanket covering his legs tighten and his eyebrows furrow.

No. He thought, his heart beating faster. Fuck, leave.

Silence. But then, another knock, this time a little bit louder. Who was it, and what did they want? He had harshly declined Bruno’s help earlier that morning, and made it clear that he didn’t want any of the other guys around. Watching Bruno retrieve his hand at his commanding voice made him regret his actions, but then again. What was he expecting from himself?

With his gaze fixed on the door, he flinched when he heard the voice of the person behind it.

“Leo?”

I don’t deserve you. He thought once again, his eyes burning. He suddenly became aware of the state he was in, with his normally silky hair now messy and tangled, tied in a low ponytail, no sign of makeup on his ghost white face, and his embarrassing attire composed by an old, short sleeved shirt –obviously too large for him- and a pair of grey night shorts, his legs exposed and, much to his regret, hairy.

“Leone, I just want to know if you’re okay-“

“I am, now leave.” Please, he wanted to add, before I say something I’ll regret.

He could feel her sighing, trying to come up with something to tell him that could’ve comforted him. But what exactly could’ve possibly made him happier? He had tried to think of something, to do something, but it only ended up hurting him more, making him lay back down, exhausted and ashamed of himself. Just the thought of it made him stomach turn, the thought of his beloved waiting for him under the pouring rain whilst he was laying in bed, frustrated... melancholic.

“Please tell me if there’s something I can do to make you feel better. I know you’re lying, but it’s okay,” a pause. Then shuffling, and the doorknob moved a little, “Can I come in, Tesoro?” she asked. Little did she know that the man was trying his hardest not to break down there, in that exact moment. Or did she? She’d never seen him or talked to him while he was in such a state, usually he would be angry and frustrated, drinking his pain away in the kitchen in the middle of the night, or even in a bar.

Silence means consent, she thought –as much as that sentence could’ve been wrong-, and she dared to open the door, moderately illuminating the chaotic room. He froze, not really sure what to do, if to yell at them or to gather all his strength to stand up and lock the door completely. But he simply stayed still, his chest rising and falling with every shaky breath he took.

“What are you doing here,” he asked, his words ended up sounding more like a statement, though. She slowly stepped inside, her gaze falling upon her handsome boyfriend’s body, partially covered by a thin, cream coloured blanket.

“I’m here to listen to you, what’s going on Leone?” she asked, slowly stepping closer to his bed. He eyed her for a moment, his eyes softening. He wanted to be mad and make her leave, he really did, she wasn’t supposed to see him like this and he deserved to suffer alone. He deserved to listen to all the horrible thoughts that his mind was full of, obsess over them.

He gasped at the light touch of her hand, which was now softly holding his, his long, bony fingers subconsciously intertwining with hers. That simple touch sent a wave of butterflies through his veins, making him shake and choke back a sob.

(Name) promptly took notice of this and sat down beside him, her eyes kind and a warm, welcoming smile on her face.

“You can cry, it’s okay to. Please look at me,” and he did, with tears finally spilling down his face, his cheeks flushed and the muscles of his chin trembling, making his lips quiver. His right hand clutched at hers as if his life depended on it, while his left was clenched in a fist, the knuckles slowly going white. (Name) worriedly moved closer to him, letting her free hand wander behind his head to untie his hair and run her fingers through it.

Tell me everything.

“I am... I don’t know. Fuck, I don’t deserve you-“ a stifled sob, and then he sharply inhaled, “You were waiting for me, but I was here. Being a useless dick even if they wanted to help. I just...” he suddenly stopped, allowing smaller sobs to escape from his parted, soft lips. The girl moved her hand from his hair to his back, pulling him closer so that his head could rest on her shoulder.

Slightly embarrassed by this position as she was the one usually laying her head on his shoulder, he tried to pull away, but her soothing touch and whispers sent a shiver up his spine and made him hold onto her for dear life, weeping and babbling about how he didn’t deserve her, about how he would miss her though if she left, and she thought she heard him say I’m sorry once or twice –and he’d rarely apologize-.

(Name) held him tight, noticing how quiet he was even while shaking and sobbing almost uncontrollably, wetting her cute, slightly elegant shirt. Not that she cared anyway, he was much more important than a stupid shirt.  

“Leo,” she whispered at some point, making him blink, more tears rolling down his reddened cheeks, “You deserve so much and you don’t even realize it. I know you blame yourself for a lot of things...” he raised his head, his hair gracefully cascading down his back; their eyes met and (Name) gave him a small smile, which he returned, “But not everything’s your fault.”

He averted his gaze, his breath slowly calming and his shoulders relaxing.

“Hm. Just promise... this whole thing will stay between us,”

She chuckled, and shifted in a more comfortable position so that they could be even closer.

“Of course; now will you eat breakfast with me?”

[eccentriccowboy]

With A Girl Like You// lh

Summary: Luke and Y/N escape their own home when a party goes too far.

Pairing: Luke x reader

Warnings: Swearing, the consumption of breakfast foods at unreasonable hours, mention of street lamps, the writer thought about peanut butter while writing this so if you have peanut allergies this is a no-go, the waitress knows mixed martial arts but thats not at all mentioned nor relevant to the story i just thought you should know so if you’re intimidated by that this might not be the one for you, egg.

dont take me seriously 

also please take note that this is too cheesy for its own good whoops

Word Count: 1.6 k

*****

Listen to: With A Girl Like You - The Troggs

You weren’t the most fond of parties. Of course, you dabbled on occasion, usually when you were feeling confident that night or had the intensions of getting drunk and forgetting it the next day. But neither of those things applied tonight, your body aching after a hard day at work and wanting nothing more than to sling yourself into bed and sleep for the next three days straight.

So you couldn’t help but groan when you walked into your home just to be met with loud music and a crowd of people. You dropped your purse onto the ground in the corner, taking off your shoes to relieve your feet, and walked into the kitchen, only to find more people. 

You knew most of them, and you said your quick hellos before going on search for who must have thrown the party. Luke. Your boyfriend and unfortunately your roommate. 

You found him lying in the living room, sitting on the couch with one arm lazily thrown across the back, a drink in his other hand. Surprisingly, he looked sober, as his attentive gaze perked up when his eyes landed on you.

“Hey, babe,” he started. He patted his lap gently, signalling for you to sit. You followed his orders, mostly for the sake of your feet. He placed his hands on your hips, pulling you a bit closer so you two could speak and comprehend what the other was saying above the pounding music.

Once seated you turned to face him. “What is all of this?” you whispered gently in his ear, trying to not cause a scene. Luke looked at you, and seemed to finally take in your appearance, taking notice of the small grimace on your face. 

“Uhm, I invited some friends over, just because I haven’t seem em in a while, being on tour an stuff,” Luke whispered back, “I didn’t think it would get this out of hand. But Mitchy brought his new girl, who brought her friend, who texted her friends. And now it’s become,” he paused and looked around, “this.” 

You sighed. You couldn’t blame Luke for this, he didn’t mean for the party to get this big, and he didn’t know that you had had one of the worst days of your life.

Luke looked back to you, his brow furrowing. “Long day?” he asked.

You managed a smile, closing your eyes nuzzling your head gently into his neck, “Tell me about it,” you exhaled.

He squeezed your hips, kissing your temple lightly. You two stayed like that for a moment, in your own peace opposite to the roaring nightlife moving around you.

“Hey,” Luke said, breaking the silence. “How bout we get outta ‘ere?” 

You didn’t bother opening your eyes, just slowly nodding into his neck and mumbling a small yes please. He picked you up from the back of your thighs, your legs tightening around his waist as he began to walk, luckily drawing little to no attention from the distracted partygoers. He continued to walk out of the house and to his car, opening up the passenger door and gently lowering you into the seat and buckling you up. 

He walked to the driver side of his car, starting the engine and turning on the heated seats, before beginning to pull out of the driveway. The silence of the car and the road this late at night was a stark contrast to the loud music blasting at your home. But as Luke took a right and the house was left out of sight, you could feel the tension that had pent up all day release from your shoulders, the comfort of just driving with your boyfriend relaxing you.

You turned, your sleepy gaze finding itself on Luke. “Where are we going?” you yawned, stretching in an attempt to regain some energy. 

Luke looked over to you, a small smirk finding its way onto his lips. “You’ll see.”

You rolled your eyes, but couldn’t help but smile nonetheless.

It wasn’t long until Luke was pulling into the parking lot of the 24 hour Diner and turning off the engine, the car becoming surprisingly even more quiet. You recognized where you were, and couldn’t help but smile as you slowly got out of the car.

“Now this decision I can get behind,” you stated, causing Luke to chuckle.

The diner was retro-style, only because what is perceived as retro now is what was normal back in the 1960s. Walking in seemed to be like walking into an alternate universe, the checkerboard floors, the neon blue seats and pink tables, the only waitress on shift hunching over the counter in a mix of fatigue and boredom. The only other person in sight was an old man with a long beard who was sat doing sudoku with a cup of coffee by the end of the counter. 

You and Luke sat yourselves in one of the booths by the window, looking out to see nothing but street lamps and the closed down convenience store across the road. 

It was as if time moved slower around you two, everything more still and silent. You and Luke were not to complain, though, the much needed quiet easily being accepted.

The waitress slowly made her way over to your table, her heels clicking on the floor above the soft sound of the Rolling Stones playing on the jukebox in the corner. 

“What can I get cha to start?” She asked. Luke kept it short but polite, asking for a decaf coffee and a water for himself. You nodded your head and asked for the same. 

The two of you sat in a comfortable silence, your leg intertwined with his underneath the table. You heard a huff from the man doing sudoku, while the waitress brought over your beverages and handed you two menus. 

It was late enough that the diner was offering breakfast foods already. Luke flipped through the menu, humming along to the song from the jukebox softly. You decided on some simple scrambled eggs and toast, closing your menu and leaning on your elbow on the table.

The waitress came along and asked for your orders nonchalantly. You both gave your orders, your voice sounding loud against the silence you were use to.

She walked back to the kitchen, apparently the only one on duty at the moment.

“Poor girl got night-shift,” you observed. Luke only nodded, reaching for your hand across the table. You didn’t mind the silence between you, finding it comfortable.

It was a few minutes of still before the man playing sudoku suddenly got up. You suspected he was going to walk out the door and leave, but instead he walked to the corner of the diner, pulling a dime out of his pocket and inserting it into the jukebox.

The man selected With A Girl Like You by The Troggs, Luke recognizing the song. He started nodding his head to the song, before his eyes lit up with an idea. 

Halfway through the first verse, Luke grabbed both of your hands and pulled you out of the booth.

'Till that time has come that we might live as one Can I dance with you?

Luke sang the lyrics, looking you in the eyes. You laughed, throwing your head back, before placing one hand on his shoulder, your right hand finding his left while his other hand placed where it belonged on your hip. The pain your feet had felt earlier was numbed as you began to get lost in the moment. 

“Ba ba ba ba bah ba ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba bah ba ba ba ba,” you both sang along, trying your best to waltz together to the beat. 

Your dancing was messy, the two of you tripping over each other’s feet. His height certainly didn’t help, his long legs making it hard to keep up. But it only made you two laugh harder, creating more noise.

The waitress in the kitchen looked up, before looking back down, a small muttering of “Kids these days...” before she continued on making your breakfast. The man playing sudoku only looked up and smiled, before returning back to his puzzle.

So before this dance has reached the end, 

Luke removed his hand from your waist, instead turning you into a spin. To you across the floor my love I'll send, 

You laughed and did the same to him, finding it hard to bring your significantly shorter arms over his head, but carried on nonetheless.

I just hope and pray that I'll find a way to say

Luke, done with his twirl, grabbed both of your hands and pulled you closer.

Can I dance with you, 

Luke whispered the final lyrics, the song continuing on, but he didn’t care. Instead, he connected his lips with yours, pulling you into a kiss while the song faded out. You were the one to break the kiss, a smile finding its way onto your lips instead. Luke returned the smile, before his attention was drawn to the kitchen door that had opened, the waitress walking out with a tray of your food.

You two quickly sat down, as if she hadn’t seen anything from the past three minutes. She placed the plates in front of you, before returning back behind the counter, leaving you and Luke alone to grin at each other from across the table.

“Wow, you’ve got some moves, Hemmings” you joked, “You should dance more often.”

Luke laughed, picking up his fork, “As long as it’s with a girl like you.”

*****

tag list? @rosegold-thorns 

[probably-writing-x]

Secret Safety.

(I've just started writing this outside and these huge storm clouds have just come over... Pathetic fallacy I guess @bringmethehorizonandpizza)

~~~~~

Camping sounded like a great idea at first. Just you and Haz surrounded by nothing but the chorus of wilderness. And for the first night, that's exactly how it had been. Harrison had bought the cutest tent possible and decorated it with a comfy double airbed, fairy lights and pillows and blankets galore. You'd spent the evening stargazing and made the most of being on your own for the night, thankful for the break away from reality.

Today felt a little different however. You'd woken up early and opted to leave Harrison to sleep in for a little longer. You slipped on his jumper from the night before and tugged on your trainers before heading outside into the field surrounding your little temporary home. The air felt a little humid but nothing out of the ordinary and the wind felt relatively non existent.

You made your way down to the waterpump at the bottom of the campsite, filling up the two bottles you'd brought with you and carrying them the relatively long walk back to the tent.

As you do, you glance up to notice an odd darkness settling over the landscape. For mid-morning, this certainly wasn't typical and it instantly made you a little uncertain. You'd never been the best when it came to storms, never understanding how people couldn't be afraid of them. But one thing that really got you was when the sky got like this. When it held that menacing possibility and a disturbing darkness that couldn't be shifted. You shuddered quickly at the thought, picking up your pace just a little to make it back to the tent.

"Morning gorgeous," Harrison's groggy morning voice speaks as you enter the tent.

The sound makes you flick your head round to him, having been too busy focusing on the clouds above and behind you.

"Everything alright?" He frowns, shifting in the bed to sit up a little which makes the blanket fall down to his stomach.

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine," You force a little smile, "Just wanted to grab some water,"

"Thanks babe," He smiles, taking the bottle of his from you and taking a sip, "But come back here,"

You can't find it in yourself to disagree so you gladly clamber back onto the slightly uncomfortable bed, welcoming the instant comfort of Harrison's arm wrapping tightly around you.

"What's the plan for today then?" He asks quietly, not wanting to disturb the tranquillity too much.

"Can we just stay here?" You mumble, burying your head into his shoulder a little.

He chuckles and you feel it rumble against your ear, "I thought you had every day planned out,"

"I don't know, guess I've changed my mind," You mutter, evidently embarrassed by your own fears.

Harrison's not convinced as he looks through the tent flap that you'd left half open to peer outside. As it waves in the building wind, he notices the looming clouds overhead - posing an instant threat to the girl wrapped in his arms. Of course, how could he forget?

~~~~~

"Come on, tell me," He laughs, encouraging the girl beside him more and more.

"No, no, just forget it, ask me something else," She shakes her head, now a blushing mess at his focus.

"Come on," Haz tilts his head to the side, hand innocently coming to rest on her leg as he speaks, "I won't judge,"

She looks up at him through her mascara emphasised lashes, still pinching herself for getting a second date with a guy like him.

"Alright, I really really hate storms," The young girl admits, mentally shrinking away like she was back to her teenage years.

"Like thunder and stuff?" Harrison raises his brows, "That's not so bad, loads of people hate that! I told you I was scared of fucking bridges!"

She laughs but shakes her head as she does, "No I mean like before a storm when all of the clouds come over and it gets dark really early and-" She waves her hands around as she talks, fueled only by her nerves, "I don't know it makes me claustrophobic or something,"

Harrison sticks out his bottom lip to emphasise his sympathy, "Well, I guess you just need somebody to protect you,"

She can't help but smile as his hand squeezes her thigh gently.

"It's not stupid," He mumbles with deep sincerity and she really knows that he means it and, if anything, it made him adore her just a little more.

~~~~~

"Mind if I leave you? I really need a pee," Harrison comments and it breaks you from your moment of mindfulness.

You pout and snuggle into him a little closer, "Yes, I do mind,"

He chuckles and wiggles away from you, "I would stay but any kind of accident would result in a whole load more problems,"

You laugh and wrap yourself up in the blankets while he's gone, trying to hold onto his fading warmth and praying that no storms started in his absence.

He's gone for longer than you'd expected so you start to fiddle with the blanket, your already anxious mind starting to fret even more thanks to your heightened fears about the worrying weather.

You're so on edge that, as Harrison goes to open the tent door, you flinch so much that you let out an involuntary squeal.

"You okay darling? It's just me," Harrison frowns, hands held behind his back.

"Yeah, yeah sorry," You mumble, shuffling and pulling the blanket up tighter around you, "I'm fine,"

"Well, I'm not being intrusive and I'm not belittling you but..." He shifts whatever was behind his back and pulls one item in front of you, "I've decided that you may not be feeling your best today, for no specific reason of course. But I got you all of the things you like that the store had, and even made them get some from the back,"

You're completely dumbfounded, so much so that you can't even find a response.

"So here's the classic, some chocolate," Your boyfriend begins, dropping some bars in front of you, "And then I got popcorn and Pringles and this cool thing that is like an indoor fondue maker or something so I got some strawberries and marshmallows for that and-" He stops and opts to dump the rest of his supplies onto the ground instead, "Yeah, I got a lot,"

You look up at him as your mouth begins to open and close to try and find a way of answering, "Haz I-"

"I know you don't like people babying you or anything but I promise that's not what this is. I just know that you hate when the sky's like this and I hate anything that makes you feel less than perfect. Hence, this," He gestures proudly to all of his products before flopping down onto the bed beside you, "But seriously, are you okay?"

You look at him for enough time to engulf his perfection before cupping his face in your hands and kissing him with enough to say that your words couldn't, "You are perfect Harrison Osterfield,"

He grins and shrugs his shoulders, "I have heard,"

You laugh and hit at his chest, "You're okay with not doing anything today though? I know we're only here for a few days an-"

Harrison shakes his head quickly, "A whole day eating a shit tonne of food with my girlfriend? I mean could I ask for much more?"

You chuckle and snuggle into him as closely as humanly possible, thankful to have that little piece of comfort amongst your terrors.

And thats how the two of you stay, wrapped up in each other like there was no concern of the weather outside. It was the first time Harrison had had to deal with your fears like this... Or so you thought.

~~~~~

He'd woken a little earlier than you, which was a rare occasion at the best of times - even if he'd set an alarm. So, Harrison cautiously wiggled his way out of the bed and headed through to the kitchen to make you some tea.

"Morning," Tom greets him as he steps into the shared living space.

Harrison winces and shushes him instantly, cautiously closing the bedroom door behind him before walking closer to Tom, "She's still sleeping,"

Tom let's the realisation be apparent on his face, "That never happens,"

Harrison chuckles and runs a hand through his hair, "Tell me about it, what's the time?"

"Eight thirty," Tom mumbles, taking a sip of the coffee in his hands and wincing at the slightly overheated liquid, "It just looks much earlier because it's so dark out. Looks like there's going to be a storm or something,"

Despite his sleepy state, Haz snaps his head up and widens his eyes, "A storm? What like when the clouds look really creepy and shit?"

Tom frowns, "We have windows Haz, look outside," He chuckles, tiredly dismissing the strange response from his friend.

Harrison flicks his eyes to the window, recognising exactly what he'd expected.

"Alright, I'll catch you later man," Harrison nods, grabbing a few supplies from the fridge and cupboards before hurrying back to his bedroom.

"Wh-" Tom starts but gives up quickly, settling back into his fatigued focus on the mug in front of him.

Harrison made a few more runs back in and out of the bedroom before everything was prepared and he cautiously made his way back to the bedroom one last time with two steaming cups of tea held in his hands.

"Hey babe, I was wondering where you were," He hears your voice, quiet and laced with that sleepy tone that you hated on yourself and loved on him.

"I woke up a little early so I made you a cuppa," He smiles, carefully setting them onto the side before climbing over you to get back into bed.

"Thanks H," You grin, propping yourself up in the bed to take a sip of the warm liquid, certainly welcome in this cold winter chill, "So, any plans today?"

"No, actually," Harrison shakes his head, wrapping an arm around you and holding his tea in the other, "I figured we'd have a movie day, just stay like this all day,"

You laugh and shake your head, "I'd love to Haz but don't you have stuff to do?"

He quickly dismisses your comment, "Just feeling a bit shitty is all, figured a day in bed could do me good,"

You frown instantly and focus on him a little more, "What's wrong baby?"

He shrugs and leans in so his lips are only inches from yours, "I'm sure I'll survive, whatever it is,"

Of course it was nothing. But he knew the only way he'd keep you here all day would be to tell you there was something wrong with him. You cared too much to say no if he'd said that was the reason.

"Well then I guess we're staying here all day," You mumble, pressing your lips against his and humming at the welcome contact.

And that was exactly how you stayed. Harrison never once telling you the real reason why.

~~~~~

Tags: @imarypayne @sunshine112 @bringmethehorizonandpizza @supernatural-girl97 @vibhati123 @butithasntkilledyouyet @faefictions @carisi-sonny @trap-house-homiecide @spiderrpcrker @tommydaspidey @oneblckcoffee @darlingtholland @fanficparker @xxtomxo @httpfandxms @jackiehollanderr @bookish-and-shy @trustfundparker

[ventrue-rosary]

“You’ve been out for days.” For Amaranthe and Balthazar?

God this has been sitting in my inbox for months but I had a little idea for a fic which fit this perfectly, so enjoy!

Ko-Fi

‘Cut!’ 

Amaranthe sighs as she flops down in her chairs, accepting the proffered bottle of water from one of the interns. 

She thought modelling exhausting work, but acting is on whole new level, even just for commercials.

‘Alrights that's a wrap people,’ the director calls.

‘Thank the gods,’ she murmurs, mincing to the dressing room. It isn't often she is so eager to take off her face but the artists had been overzealous with the foundation. Like anyone needs that amount of makeup.

By the time she reaches the dressing room she feels...off. A very tender stomach. She did think the salad looked rather sad and wilted when presented to her it. It must have been out of date.

She makes it to her vanity, despite the overwhelming fatigue. She really is unwell. She reaches for her bag to call for Balthazar to pick her up. It's just out of reach. She leans far out of her chair and falls to the ground.

‘Shit!’ Amaranthe hisses. Her ears ring. The room spins. She wants to puke.

‘Let me help you.’ A voice pierces through the ringing. 

She allows them to pull her up.

‘I don't feel well. I need to get home…’ Her eyes flutter as exhaustion surges behind them.

‘I’ll take you home. Don't worry.’ He hoists her over his shoulder as her consciousness slips away.

Amaranthe emerges slowly from a dreamless sleep. Her head thumps rhythmically as she slowly opens her eyes. A bright light causes it to spike. She throws her head to the other side with a moan. Only then does she notice the manacles binding her wrists and ankles to a chair. She tries to struggle free, shaking and then straining against her restraints.

‘Hello? HELLO!’ Her hoarse voice breaks. Her eyes close from the pain. So thirsty…

‘Please don't yell. I’m right here.’

Her eyes open. A pair of male hands hold a plastic cup of water. They press it to get lips and she drinks greedily, slaking the burning thirst. 

Amaranthe peers up at her benefactor and blinks in confusion and shock, seeing cloudy grey eyes and tousled sandy hair.

‘You...from the studio? You have to let me out, please!’

He reaches over and cups her face. His touch makes her skin crawl.

‘Why would I do that after all the trouble I went through to get you here?’

Amaranthe trembles and shivers but not from his words. She nearly blacks out, her surroundings fading to a dim blur.

‘HEY!’ A sharp slap brings her back to the present.

Amaranthe gasps as she opens and closes her jaw to check the damage. The strike certainly stings.

‘Seems the drug is still in your system.’ He sighs as he stands back, pondering her. ‘But can I really afford to wait? A high profile woman goes missing, people notice.’

Amaranthe ignores him for now to take stock of her surroundings. For any clue to her location or any tool to help her escape. 

The room is large and mostly empty, just one door on the far wakk. The part of the room she is in is mocked-up to look like a studio for a photo-shoot, a plain back-drop behind her, studio lights and a tripod aiming a camera at her.

No way for her to escape on her own. 

‘Why did you bring me here?’

He chuckles as he kneels down in front of her. ‘Is it not obvious? We are meant to be together.’

Great. He’s not just sadistic, he's a nut job, she thinks to herself, cursing silently.

How long has he shadowed her steps, waiting, watching, wanting? How long had she been ignorant to his presence?

‘So you love me?’ 

‘Of course!’

‘You’d do anything I asked?’ 

‘I would burn the world and everyone in it, if you asked.’

‘Then can you undo these restraints? How am I supposed to return your love when I’m chained down?’

He smiles. Amaranthe supposes it must be kind, but it's like like a wolf baring its fangs.

Her vision blurs again. She’s losing lucidity 

‘Darling, you don't need to do anything to prove your love, other than sit there and be perfect.’

Her head lulls. She clings to whatever consciousness remains, but it escapes her.

‘See?’ A camera shutter snaps. ‘You're perfect just the way you are…’

Amaranthe awakens again. She has no idea how much time has passed, but she feels more alert and awake, like a fog has lifted from her mind.

She's alone the time, no sign of her captor. She tries her manacles again, and gasps from the pain of the cold metal against her broken skin.

Amaranthe's mind wanders out of her prison to the outside world. Vander and Balthazar...surely they both noticed she is missing. Balthazar at the very least expected her home after the filming. How long exactly had passed since then? 

She wishes he was here to take her away from this awful place.

She whispers her name in the dark, a private wish she speaks into existence. 

Footsteps echo down from across the room. A door opens and the lights flicker on. She squints as the harsh fluorescents assault her eyes.

‘Good morning, my love,’ he greets her exuberantly, holding a tray with a plate of scrambled eggs, sausages and hash browns and a cup of water. Her eyes notice the knife on the plate. ‘Hungry?’

‘How long have I been here?’ She asks. Her throat itches once more.

‘Almost twelve hours. It’s 7am--breakfast time.’ He pulls up a chair in front of her, and holds out a forkful of eggs. ‘Eat.’

Amaranthe turns her head away. She couldn't possibly stomach any food now.

‘Don't be stubborn now, love, you need to eat.’

‘I don't want any food,’ she mumbles.

‘It’ll help you feel better. Now open wide--’

The manacles offer her a few inches of movement--just enough. She kicks the leg of his chair. He falls back, the tray flying from his grasp. She manages to use her foot to pull the knife towards her as he recovers.

‘LOOK WHAT YOU DID!’ He roars, spittle flying. He takes a few deep breaths, fists clenching and unclenching. ‘I didn't mean to yell. But you ruined breakfast. Now I need to...I need to clean this up. And arrange a suitable punishment for you.’ 

He casts her a dark look before he leaves the room, the door slamming in his wake.

Amaranthe wastes now time. She swings her chair from side to side until she falls on the ground to the right. Her fingers blindly grope until they clasp the hilt of the knife. She twists it in her grip until the blade rests against her bindings, and begins working. But the chains are metal. It would take hours to saw through them.

‘Fuck! Please…’ she begs as she continues, as though prayers alone would free her.

A yell and a series of dull thuds sound from upstairs. The knife clangs against the tiled floor. Silence falls, but not for long.

Two sets of feet descend down towards her. Neither are her captors.

The door swings open. Balthazar and Vander step through, appearing frantic. They take one look across the room before they spot her.

‘Amara! Oh, god...what did he do to you?’ Balthazar gently caresses her face. She breaks into sobs.

‘You came...you both came.’

‘Of course we did.’ Vander pulls out some lock picks and gets to work freeing her from her manacles.

When they finally fall from her limbs, it is a feeling of utmost freedom and relief. She throws herself into Balthazar's arms, relishing in the warmth and protection.

‘Come on, sweetie. Let's get you home.’ He throws his jacket over her shoulders before taking her up in his arms, carrying her away.

The limo is waiting outside. Vander sits close in back with her, chatting idly mostly to make sure she remains conscious.

Amaranthe makes it for the whole journey to the hospital before she falls back into unconsciousness once more. Vander's gentle voice lulls into a muffled whisper, then silence.

Amaranthe’s rest is interrupted by the steady beep of a heart monitor. Her eyes meet the fluorescent lights above, fending off the impending dim of dusk. She winces as her wakefulness draws awareness to her aching body, and the nausea swirling in her stomach. 

Her stirring rouses Balthazar dozing in the chair at her bedside.

‘Finally awake, sleeping beauty?’ he smiles at her sleepily. ‘You’ve been out for days. I’ll get the nurse.’

‘No!’ She seizes hold of his forearm. ‘Please, stay.’

‘Of course.’ He settles back into his chair, holding her hand between his. ‘How do you feel?’

‘Exactly as expected after sleeping through for days.’

Balthazar laughs softly, but the levity is short-lived. ‘Amara, do you remember what happened?’

Her eyes drop to the blanket covering her lower half. She idly picks at a loose thread. ‘Of course I do.’

‘Can you tell me?’

‘I was done shooting for the day. I drank water from one of the interns...then I woke up there in that...place. He took a photo.’

‘He took several. We found them,’ he corrects her gently.’

Amaranthe only feels sicker, her hands instinctively curling into fists. She had only been conscious for one. ‘May I see them?’

‘Sorry ...we turned them into the police. For evidence.’

‘Of course.’

‘Did anything else happen while you were there?’

‘He didn’t rape me, if thats what you’re asking.’

‘It wasn’t but....that’s a relief.’

‘What did you do to him?’ Amaranthe raises her gaze to his. Tears spill from her eyes as an uncustomary anger consumes him. ‘What did you do?’

‘He won’t hurt you, again. Or anyone. We made sure of that.’

‘Good.’

[obfuscatedcarisi]

All the times Sonny Could have kissed you but didn’t (and the one time he did)

Part 5 is here. I am so sorry this took so long. I’m week 3 at my new job and it’s been a real ride. My boss got into an accident on my first day and has been off work ever since and so I have had to hit the groud sprinting with no training I am barely alive rn.

Anyway. I hope you like this one - let me know what you think! Also shoutout to Kindergarten Cop!

Part 5 / ?

You walked into what felt like the 37th library of the day in search of someone who might recognize your perp. He'd been tearing out carefully selected pages from a library copy of The Divine Comedy and leaving them with his victims once he'd finished with them.

“The more a thing is perfect, the more it feels pleasure and pain.”

It was truly heinous.

So here you were, doing your absolute best to politely interrogate the sweet librarian with Carisi by your side. You were fed up, your patience wearing thin. You knew the fatigue was showing all over your face.

You huffed and turned away, pretending to inspect the surroundings and trying to squash the panic rising in your chest. You needed to catch a break. This felt like you were wasting valuable time but it was the only lead you had. Looking around, you saw nothing out of the ordinary; dark wooden tables marred by years of stains and scratches, metal chairs upholstered in burgundy burlap. Did it match the green carpet tiles? Of course not, but you didn’t suppose that was a consideration. There was a group of children, kindergartners you supposed, sat on the carpet in the kid’s corner and….seemingly unsupervised….

As one of them came running over, Carisi touched your elbow and turned you to face him.

“What was that?” You asked, straining a smile at the woman behind the desk.

“I said I can ask my supervisor, she remembers everyone and everything that passes through here.”

“I’ll come with you, Y/L/N you can wait here. Besides,  Carisi nodded behind you, a glint in his eye. “I think you’ve made a friend.”

You looked around and the small child was grinning at you with a big gap toothed smile.

“Hi” you said, crouching down to meet them on their level.

“Hi” the child beamed “ Are you going to read us a story?” It was more of a plea than a question.

“Uhh, isn’t there someone else here who does that?” you looked around for someone who could looked like they might be already employed to do that kind of thing.

“They said they had to step out for a second. That was ages ago!”

So, probably just a few seconds, you thought. You pulled your most dramatic shocked face “Ages! Well. In that case, what are we reading?”

Despite your mood, you were not an asshole, and would not take your frustrations out on anyone, especially not children. You followed the child over to the group and was promptly handed a large, square, hardback, picture book.

The Birds and The Bees

Oh boy. This was surely inappropriate. And way, way above your pay grade.

“Ummmm. I’m not sure this is -”

You looked around and saw Carisi coming towards you. Disappointed. That was way too quick to be positive.

“Hey -” His voice was urgent. He was cut off.

“Where do babies come from?” A little voice piped up from the back. You’d never seen Carisi look so stunned. His mouth hung open.

“Uhhhhh”

He’d been reduced to only blinking. You bit down on your lip to keep from laughing.

“My dad’s a gynecologist. He looks at vaginas all day long.” another voice added.

Wow. Things were getting real over here. “Well. That’s. Um.” Carisi began, gesturing haphazardly with his hands.

“Our mom says our Dad’s a real sex machine.” A pair of identical twins decided to add to the discussion.

You choked on your own spit and doubled over. Tears springing to the corners of your eyes.

“Hey you OK” Sonny’s voice broke through the choking. This was Sonny checking on you, not just Carisi. One hand came to the small of you back, the other cupping your cheek, concern written over his face.

“I’m good” you laughed, not holding back anymore.

“Are you boyfriend and girlfriend?” Another child teased.

Sonny didn’t look away. He was still checking you over. His eyes met yours, finally, he let himself go and gave you the biggest, brightest smile you’d ever seen on him.

“Well...We’re...uhhhh” He searched your face, looking for the right answer.

“Are you two going to kiss?!” a disgusted voice rang out “Yuck!” they screeched.

“KISS! KISS! KISS! KISS! KISS!”

He let out a nervous laugh but actually dipped his head down.

“Detective! That's him over there!” The librarian shouted out, pointing towards the doorway.

“Fuck!” You yelled as you both tore away from each other and sprinted in the direction of the man who was making a beeline for anywhere-but-here-and-now.

You couldn't tell if the gasps were because you were YELLING in a library, because you CURSED in front of kindergartners or because of the thrill of a live police chase. Sadly, you couldn't stick around to find out.