#like i knew he fucks the dog but its been so long since that game came out that

[musings-ofthe-unamused]

Love and Deepspace Headcanons: Denial

A/N: My bestie is forcing me to try this game again... So I might as well make some stuff for it!

There's a surprising lack of gifs I can find on here, so I went ahead and made my own headers :3

Warnings: 18+

Ask Box: Open

Masterlist | Ko-Fi | VGen | Patreon

Xavier:

I personally think he isn't the type to be too into denial

Sure, I think he gets angry or annoyed

But it clears pretty quickly

And once he sees how much its affecting you… immediately stops

Apologizes instantly

Puppy dog eyes 

Your hand is pressed firmly against Xavier's abs. You bit your lip, trying to keep in your cool. It's not easy. You had already worked yourself up by kissing him senseless and pulling back when he tried to go further. But he had taken control quickly, taking off his clothes and going for your weak spot: your neck. 

No matter how much you apologized or told him to keep going, he just gave you a soft glare to shut you up. But you had enough. Your hips moved against his bulge. You frowned and tried to push him back against the bed.

"Xavier, I can't take it."

He blinked, his head raising to meet your gaze. "Huh?"

"I want it."

"O-Oh." His face flushed as if he realized what he was doing. His eyes softened. "S-Sorry."

"Come here."

Rafayel:

Him and his teasing

Fleeting kisses, barely touching you

That fucking smirk

He loves seeing you get frustrated

But it backfires 

And suddenly, he regrets denying you

Rafayel let out a huff as you pushed him down onto the couch. One moment, he was touching you in all the spots that were so close to where you needed that heat. The next, you had his hands pinned above his head as you straddled his hips. He stared up at you. He wasn't expecting this.

"Woah, there. Getting feisty?"

You smirked. "I don't think you're in the position to judge."

"No. But I like this position."

"Really?" You leaned down, nipping at his neck. "You won't like it for too long."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It's your turn to get frustrated."

Zayne:

I also feel like he isn't super into it?

The type to do it accidentally

Long nights working, barely paying attention to you

The occasional text or two

Not even sending a suggestive photo gets a big reaction

So imagine his surprise when he finally gives you the time of day

And you're waiting there like a feast waiting to be devoured

"You're finally back."

"Sorry. Work has been-" Zayne paused. He gaped at you. "What are you-"

"This? Just got comfortable. Is there a problem?"

There was a problem. Zayne had suddenly realised how much he craved you. It had been too long since he last touched you. He was denying you and himself of a pleasure that needed to be filled. 

He dropped his bag to the floor. His shoes and coat soon followed. His eyes were glued on your scantily clad form as he slowly walked over to you. You hid a smile as you watched him loosen his tie. This was the exact reaction you wanted. To make him so hungry for you, he wouldn't be able to resist.

"Do you have work tomorrow?" His husky voice sent a shiver down your spine.

"No." You shook your head.

"Good."

"Do you?"

"I'm calling off."

"Good."

Sylus:

Oh my god, nothing brings him more joy than denying you of what you want

He loves seeing you squirm 

The sweat dripping down the side of your face as he hits in just the right spot

You're teetering on the edge of pure ecstasy

But he just keeps pulling you back

Wants to see you beg

Sylus knew how to make you writhe in pure pleasure. He knew where to touch, kiss, bite. He knew he had you wrapped around his finger. And right now, you were so tightly wound, you were about to break. He drank in the sight of you arching your back, on your hands and knees for him. HIs thrusts were languid and relaxed. The two of you had been at this for hours.

He reached out, his large hand moving over the expanse of your bare back. "Look at you. A complete wreck."

"Please, Sylus." Your voice was hoarse. "I can't take it anymore."

"What did I say? You have to be clear when you beg."

You whimpered and gripped the sheets tightly in your hands. "Please make me cum, Sylus. Please…""Since you begged so nicely…" HIs hand wrapped around your head and tugged sharply. "I'll give you what you want."

Caleb:

He does it for one reason only

To see if you still need him

And boy, do you need him

Constantly asks you to tell him how you need this

Tell him that you need him

That you'll never stop

He'll keep denying you of it until you're almost in tears

And then he gives you what you want

"Tell me…"

Caleb's voice is soft against your ear. Your back arched as his fingers moved inside of you painfully slowly. Your face was flushed, lips parted as you hung onto him. Your body quivered in pleasure at just the sound of his voice. You wanted to be pushed past that peak.

"I need it."

"And?"

"I need you."

"You do?"

You nodded, swallowing thickly. "Please. I need you so badly, Caleb."

"I need you too."

Caleb kissed you deeply, his fingers plunging into you once again. The speed was faster this time. He curled his hand and sent you over the edge with just that one movement. You let out a cry that was swallowed by Caleb. He pressed against you. His heart was hammering in his chest. He never wanted to leave this moment. He wanted you to need him forever.

[puppetgirlsstuff]

Choso x Black Reader.

Summary: It's been while since you've seen your bestie. She called you up to go to an night party. You know you couldn't say no so you went. But just for an surprise you'll be seeing someone you didn't think that wouldn't be their.

Warning: fingering, secrets, kissing, getting drunk, smoking, slurs, and mouth job.

As you got ready for you're night out. You heard a buzzing sound. It was you're phone you walked over as you're dress shines in the light with the redness shows out well. It was you're bestie Brooke. She texted you. It saids she arrived. You put you're phone in your bag and headed down stairs to the door. But before you left you gave you're dog some pats before leaving out and locking the door.

When you walked down from the stairs you headed to her car. Opening the car door. Getting in then closing it. "Hey! Bitch I haven't seen you in so long!" Brooke saids to me as she try to hug me in the car. "I know I know I've missed you too!" You tell her as she got done hugging you. Before starting up the car again and started y'all way to the party. "So what's been going on?" You asked her. "Shit nothing much just been getting my bread up. The stripper club isn't so bad once you get used to the assholes around." you giggled at her statement.

"What? I'm being for real. Like they would be drunk as hell just to pour out about their relationships issues. But shit it gets me more money." She takes a right turn through the streets. "But what about you babygirl? I know you've been hella busy I feel like its been a year." She saids with her dramatic tone. "Just been studying theses teachers killing the hell outta me with there work though. No gone lie make's me wanna drop out of college but I wouldn't dare." You gave it to her straight while leaning your head into the seat. "Aw honey I'm sorry to hear that. But you a good one I wouldn't be able to do that shit."

You guys talked a bit more before pulling up to loud music, changing color lights, bottles everywhere on the lawn, some people outside smoking and a hole lotta cars. Brooke park the car and you both got out. "Ready?" She asks you and you nodded. You both walked in the house and well damn you there was a lot going on. Even with games. "Okay so like what you wanna try first!?" Brooke yelled out because of the music. "Let's start with the cup game!" You both walked over just to see a free spot to play. You already knew what to do. This was your favorite game of all.

You waited for a opponent. Just for a pretty damn handsome 5,11 guy to walk up. "Damn that nigga hot." Brooke whispers in your ear. "Bitch you damn right same thing I was think of." You responsed. You felt like he heard y'all because his smirk popped up on his sexy face. He already looked so good with his hair down on his face, and his body. Oh Lord that body. "Hm? Wait... Gurl that's Choso. Remember yo crush back in high school." She was right it was him took you long enough to remember.

You couldn't believe it. But sad part about it you hated him and stop day dreaming over him. You just started the game. Throwing one after another. You realized you were losing to him. 'The hell? Get it together Y/N.' Before you noticed it he won the game. You were upset by it and the drinks made it no better. He smiles at you knowing the feeling you got from the game. You just walked away trying to not let him see it no longer. Brooke followed after you. "Are you okay!?" She yelled. "Yeah just surprised! Can we just find something else to do!?" She nodded and grabbed your hand before taking you to the basement. You were hit with smell of weed. You sat down on couch where they were smoking at. "Pass dat." You told the boy next to you. It wasn't that loud so it was cool to just use your inner voice a bit. You got down to work. It was a cycle. Just smoking it, passing to the next, and drinking.

'Fuck I need to refill my drink.' You got up and let Brooke know you'll be back. You went back upstairs. And headed to the kitchen. You refilled it and turned back around to head back but you ended up bumping into someone. Making your drink spilled upon your chest. It leaks down a bit slowly. "Fuck watch where your fucking going dude!" You told him off. You look up to see it was Choso. "Oh I'm sorry mamas didn't see you there." You knew it was bullshit. "Why were you so close!?" You looked at him pissed.

"Just forget it!" You didn't give him time to answer and stormed off the bathroom. You found one that was free. You walked in it and closed the door. Your top of the dress was ruined and smelled like strong liquor. You started to wipe some off but it was still some on your breasts. So you unzipped your dress a bit so you could clean them off. You heard a knock on the door. "I'm in here!" you yelled and continued to wipe some off. As you looked in the mirror the door was opening. You didn't have time to close it. But it was no other then Choso walking in and closing the door.

"Hey what the hell I'm busy!?" You tell him trying to hide you're half naked body. You try to put back on your dress. But fails to "No need for the clothes babe." He saids locking the door before walking up to you and pressing up against your ass. You didn't know why put you felt a type a way. "What are you doing. Back up some.." You looked down from the mirror. You didn't want to see his face. Everytime you did it made things worse. "Embarrassed sweet heart?" He saids as he leans onto your neck with kisses. You're breathing felt heavy. His hands felt upon you're dress. As he takes it off fully. You weren't wearing a bra. It's not like you needed it.

"Mm you naughty little slut you weren't wearing nothing." You whimpered a bit to his words. But of course you had panties your dark red soft panties. He gripped both of your breasts while playing with your nipples. Pitching them bit. While he sucked on you neck. You felt heavy under him. Everything you were taking in. You felt wet. He stopped sucking on your neck. "You were just so mean to me. Why is that?" He teases you in his tone "And not only that you just started to get so cold towards me back in high school."

He let's go of one of your boobies as it bounces. Then he took that hand to pull your head back so you were looking at the mirror. "Answer me!" His deep tone scares you but only made you wetter. You couldn't answer him. "No answer? Hm that's okay babe you don't have to talk yet." He let's go of your hair then your other boob. You thought he was done after not answering him. But so dead wrong you was. You felt him taking off your panties. They slid down on it's own. You felt his fingers pushed inside. It caught you off.

It made you moan out. "So wet. And yet I haven't even touched you that much." His pace got sped up a bit. Teasing you and it was annoying. You're whimpers were telling that out to him. "F-faster.." your words were going downhill. Those drinks finally kicking in. "I don't think you understand. You're not the one whos calling the shots here." He goes deeper. And you pout at his words. His pace sped up a bit. But more deep he goes. "More more.." He smiles "No babe you don't get what you want remember?"

He takes his fingers out of you. "On your knees and in front me now." His tone you felt. But you did as he saids. "Feel it." You put your hand to feel it through his pants. "You see how hard you've made me feel." He groans out. "You know what to do get to work." You unbuckle his pants and pulls them down. You see it poking through. You pull his underwear down. "Go ahead." You start by licking it and a few strokes. He groans out to your touch. You tasted the tip and licking it in circles.

"Oh fuck babe. I need more." He pushes you up and down on it making you go fast. The sounds fills the room. You couldn't help but gag on him. Your moans sent him. "Shit your mouth feels so good." He slaps your face a couple of time. "Look at my face with those pretty eyes." You look at him with watery eyes. "Ahh shit hm. So good." He chuckles a bit. "Don't cry babe you know you like it." You close you're eyes while the tears streams down. But you feel pain on your cheek. "What the fuck I say bitch eyes open." He moans out and pulls your head all the way down on him. "Shit!" He came down your throat. And took it outta you're mouth. "Swallow all of it." Once again you do as you're told. "Good girl. Since you've been so good for me I'll let you cum." You get up off your knees and stand in front of him.

"Where do you want me most mamas? Inside you dicking you deep. While I'm holding you up in the air?" You nodded to him. "Yes p-please." You tell him and he looks at you. He picks you up and now both of you are making full eye contact. You wrap your legs around him same with your arms. He starts to kiss you. His tongue connecting with yours. Before you knew it he slips it inside you. The feeling of how tight you were. "Oh fuck-.." He moan in the kiss.

He started his pace fucking you against the wall. You're nail deep into his back. As he starts to increase it. "You're so tight. So perfect for me." You felt him stretching you out. He wasn't small he's pretty big from what you thought. "H-harder." You tell him. The pain turn into pleasure but you wanted more from him. "As you wish." He whispers in your ear. Then starts to rough kiss you as he went in deeper and harder in you. You screamed his name between the kisses he gave. He knows you were getting close.

He keep on he felt it. Before you knew it you came on him. It came down hard you were shaking from it. "That's my girl." He whispers. You were trying to calm down from your high. But he keep going. You cried out to him. "No it hurts.. To much." Your started to tear up. "No stop."

"Aww why stop? You were just begging for it like the little slut you are." He tells you as he thrusts in deeper. "Plus babe I haven't cum inside yet." You couldn't take being overstimulated. You never did it before. "Shh it's okay were almost there."

He was right you felt him twitching. You bite his neck for support. Your spit leaking down from the bite mark. "Ah fuck. Just a few more. I know you can handle it." He pounds into you a little more. You whimper loudly while squeezing your eyes shut. "I know I kno-.. Fuck. It's okay babe I know your coming down to another orgasm." You breath heavily to his words you knew he was right. "Cum for me mamas." He tells you as his last thrust inside you.

The body beneath him as her orgasm crashed over her, her pussy clamping down around his cock like a silken vice. A scream of pure ecstasy tore from her throat, tears streaming down her face as waves of pleasure consumed her. He let out a groan as he felt her come undone, her climax triggering his own.

With one final, brutal thrust, he buried himself to the hilt inside her spasming channel as his own release overtook him. His hot seed erupted from his cock, painting her insides white and jerked in her. He holds her for a bit a calm down before putting her down.

As the final aftershocks faded, He looks down at her, his eyes dark and intense. He brushed away her tears with his thumb, a hint of tenderness in the gesture that made the moment all the more unsettling.

"That's my good girl," he murmured, his voice a low, satisfied rumble. "My perfect little whore." You both got cleaned up after that. He made sure you had his number. Because after that there's no way he's letting you get away from him again. You said you're good bye to Choso and went off to find Brooke. Once you did she yelled at you about disappearing for to long. She was worried something had happened.

Truth is nothing did. You just had some catching up to do with an old crush of yours.

[blouisparadise]

Upon request, today we have a rec list of fics where Louis, Harry, or both of them have pets. This is a great group of fics, so please be sure to check them all out and show the authors some love! If you enjoy our rec lists, please also like and reblog this post to help spread the word. Happy reading!

1) Maple | Mature | 5,255 words

Prompt 30: Louis is crazy about animals, so Harry is determined to get him all the pets he wants even if they are unconventional, like a baby goat. Louis is over the moon when they get to adopt a goat family, but there’s one little problem, and that is the goat not liking Harry…or even letting him get close to Louis. At first it’s all endearing fun and games, but when it starts affecting their sex life and Harry’s dick feeling neglected, he’s determined to try win over the goat so he let him be with Louis. It’s easier said than done - who knew goats could screech that loudly? (Tip: google goat screaming to get an idea how loud.) ***Change to a cow, I hope that is okay.

2) At The End Of My Rope | Mature | 5,608 words

"Baby?" Harry mumbles, voice laced with sleep and a shiver goes through Louis at hearing the term. He hasn't called him that in so long, in that voice and, clearly, even Louis' body fucking misses it. "Did you cheat on me?" Louis finds himself asking. If he's being honest it's more so he can see Harry's reaction, than a genuine question, but what has he got to lose? Sure enough, Harry's face changes from sleepy to the most incredulous look Louis' ever seen on him. He actually looks terrified, all wide eyes, mouth gaping like he can't believe Louis would even assume that and Louis would laugh at it, but he's so done with the way Harry's been acting, he just wants to know what the hell's going on.

3) If This Room Was Burning | Explicit | 8,629 words

Where Louis' cat gets stuck on the roof and Harry is the firefighter who ends up saving her.

4) I Built This Bed For Two (I Built This Bed For Me and You) | Explicit | 8,942 words

Harry and Louis broke up after uni and haven't seen each other since—until they're roped into doing a Buzzfeed video together. Featuring awkward cuddling and a reunion that just needed a kick in the arse, gleefully provided by Niall.

5) Glistening Under The Sun (You’re My Honey Soaked Love) | Mature | 8,996 words | Sequel

“Oh Petal,” he picks her up nuzzling the top of her head with his cheek as she nibbles on the lavender, “How lucky are we? I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy, the only thing we have to be sad about is that soon I won’t be able to hold you like this,”

6) Candle Wax & Polaroids On The Hardwood Floor | Explicit | 13,082 words

Prompt 463: Clumsy modern witch Louis AU where he accidentally gives his roommate Harry a love potion and he has a crisis because he thinks he will get in trouble with the law for technically poisoning someone and Harry’s heart eyes aren’t helping.

7) A Vivid And Wistful Melody | Explicit | 13,137 words

"Slowly, he takes his violin out of its case, listens for a few more minutes to Louis’ flute, before joining him as best as he could. The flute stops for a few seconds, and Harry imagines Louis blinking cutely, taken aback, before huffing with a smile, and starting to play again, on a suddenly far happier tune. Harry closes his eyes as he twirls around the living room, violin in hand and music filling the air. He pictures Louis doing the same in his own flat while being careful as to not step on his cat. Somehow, even with heavy eyes and tired limbs, this is the happiest Harry has ever felt in years."

8) Absolutely Smitten | Mature | 20,120 words

Louis is walking his dog. Harry is walking his cat. Leashes get tangled, and feelings too.

9) I Didn't Fall For You (You Fucking Tripped Me) | Explicit | 20,681 words

These days Louis tends to steer clear of dating alphas. He’s dated too many knotheads in his time, and he’s ready to just focus on school and his friends and his pet monitor lizard, of course. Too bad the alpha next door won’t take a hint and stop using the worst pick up lines of all time on him. He’s really got to stop laughing with him--and talking to him and walking to class with him and letting him bring him coffee and tea and gifts for his lizard and watching Netflix together and...

10) Nocturnal Creatures Are Not So Prudent | Mature | 24,558 words

Louis is a white witch with a little black cat named Hemlock and a best human friend Liam (they're a lot like Samantha Stephens and Louise Tate). When he's dragged out to a new club Liam's heard about from a friend and classmate, Louis comes face to face with that which witches do not touch: a charming vampire by the name of Harry.

11) Weightless | Explicit | 25,332 words

Harry is the best dragon racer the world has ever seen and Louis is an almost-vet who feels like he is carrying the weight of the world.

12) A Common Place Affliction | Explicit | 36,508 words

“You should go home,” Louis muses, and Harry can feel the omega crouch down to become eye level with Harry, poking his cheek with a dainty finger. Harry lifts his arm, taking a peek at Louis’ face. Louis looks tired, he notes, but not exhausted, and there’s an eyelash stuck to his cheek. Harry doesn’t hesitate to lazily reach out and thumb over his cheek. “Can’t,” Harry croaks, blindly twisting his hand around to grab at Louis’ offending finger and just holding it. “C’mere. Take a nap with me,” he asks after a beat, opening an eye to look at Louis. Louis raises an eyebrow. “M’not going to nap with you in the middle of the ER, H.” Sighing, Harry squeezes the young nurse’s finger. “Nobody cares.” He knows they do; they’ll annoy nurses and probably worry patients when they catch sight of a nurse and surgeon sleeping on the job. Let alone in the middle of the emergency ward hallway. Harry can hear the complaints now: ‘these are the people we’re supposed to trust with our lives?��

13) You Wish I Was Yours And I Hope That You're Mine | Explicit | 36,992 words

The one where Harry's a bit strange and Louis doesn't give up easily. Of course, they fall in love.

14) Give Me Love | Explicit | 41,041 words

Louis doesn't feel like a good omega, Harry doesn't remember how to be an alpha, and they figure it out together.

15) This Glass House | Mature | 43,072 words

While deployed, Alpha Harry gets injured by an IED explosion, leaving him to deal with severe injuries in its devastating aftermath. During his road to acceptance and recovery he learns with the help of Louis and their children just how important family can be for the mind, body, and soul.

16) Breakable Heaven | Mature | 44,594 words

“What do you think?” Louis gets captured by Harry’s green eyes, unable to look away or even take a breath. “I think you’re the most magnificent creature I’ve ever met.” “You must not have met many creatures then.” Harry’s eyes glance downward to Louis’ lips and his tongue darts out to wet his own. “None like you.”

17) Yesterday Came Suddenly | Explicit | 48,504 words

They don’t talk about it. The way Harry deflects any and all questions about his past and Louis pretends he isn’t confused or hurt by it. The way Harry keeps a distance between them and Louis acts like he can’t see it creating a wall between them. The way Harry doesn’t always answer honestly and Louis goes along with it as if he can’t tell. They don’t talk about it. Harry knows Louis feels like he doesn’t know him well enough, and it pains him. It pains him every time Louis gets that look on his face that’s a mixture of disappointment, frustration, and confusion. And sometimes, self-blame. It pains him because Louis is wrong. Because even though there is a lot Louis doesn’t know about him, there is so much that he does. He knows what Harry is like at his most vulnerable: curled up on this bed with him in the dark where it’s safest. He knows Harry in a way no one else does.

18) So Much We Didn’t Say | Mature | 53,584 words

Harry’s near fatal accident exposed the cracks in his and Louis’ eleven year marriage. A serious error in judgement by Louis shattered it completely.

19) Secret's Safe With Me | Explicit | 59,208 words

When bad turbulence and three glasses of wine have Louis spilling all of his secrets to the man sitting next to him on the plane, it's embarrassing, sure, but it's also easy enough to shrug off and block out of his memory forever. Or at least, it was until Louis went into work on Monday morning and realized that the man from the plane is the new CEO of his company.

20) Tug-Of-War | Explicit | 63,000 words

Louis' husband dies suddenly and he is left with nothing. Well, not really nothing. He has Harry. And a St. Bernard puppy named Link, whom his late husband left behind for him. Louis takes care of Link and Harry takes care of Louis. Everything is okay until suddenly, it isn't.

21) Sweet Creature | Explicit | 78,282 words

Prompt: "You're having a nightmare and I feel bad because you're trembling and crying so I crawl into bed with you and hold you so you feel safe, but in the morning you wake up with my arms around you and you're really confused and embarrassed."

22) Elysian | Mature | 81,886 words

Harry is running out of time to fall in love, but with Louis, it seems as if there’s all the time in the world.

23) Beautiful War | Mature | 103,379 words

Five years ago, Louis was nearly the next victim in a string of murders plaguing Portland, Oregon. He managed to escape and the Angel Killer was apprehended and sent to prison. Now, Louis' a best-selling author that assists state police with minor cases. He still suffers from the events of the days he'd been held hostage, but he's found ways to cope. That is, until the killings start up again. A body was found in the woods. A body that bared the same signature the media had dubbed: The Angel of Death. Special Agent Harry Styles leads the case, and he doesn't buy into the clairvoyant bullshit that Louis spewed to save face five years ago. He's certain that Louis Tomlinson was involved. Until they meet, and they're both left questioning everything they'd thought to be true.

24) Only You Can Be My Alpha | Explicit | 212,387 words

In a world where one was either an Alpha or an Omega wolf, Louis found himself in a body that could be neither. Born an Omega without the expected characteristics of one, he felt broken, choosing to live as Alpha a lifestyle as he could. Harboring a serious lack of respect for Alphas and their authority complexes, Louis managed to get himself banished from his home, forced to wander the unforgiving woods for years, facing the elements and fighting enemy rogues each time they arose. Unbeknownst to Louis, in a tribe to the southwest of his home, there lived a dysfunctional Alpha, the orphaned pack leader Harry, who had never felt satisfied enough with anyone to settle down and continue his royal line. Living their lives apart thus far, the both of them assumed that they might be alone forever, making the best of things despite this even though it hurt. Chance, luck, or maybe fate brings Louis to this tribe when he’d least expected to receive kindness and shelter from a stranger, and when he arrives, something in his soul pulls him to Harry like a raging river current. The two don’t get off to a good start, but everyone around them can sense the chemistry—and in time they do too.

Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.

[nerdyvocals]

Wow, it's been like two months since I posted the Descendants 2 quotes list, and its been a month since @look-at-those-niceass-rocks and I watched D3. We're planning on watching Rise of Red tonight, so it feels like an apt time to give you the unhinged things we had to say about Descendants 3. As always, the dumbassery is under the cut. Please enjoy!

Me: They have a bigger budget but somehow everything is Worse

Bee: Her wig is worse Me: ... I don't know who you're talking about, but you're right

Mal: Not a tentacle in sight Me: That is the opposite of kinky

Honorable Mention: A much too long interlude of us trying to figure out what the timeline here is, because at times it feels like they're all much older, but others it seems like D2 *just* happened.

Bee: DOUG WHAT IS YOUR HAIR Me: Bad!

Ben: *proposing* Me: You are seventeen (I think???) Bee: You are in high school (probably???)

Me: That ring is hideous Bee: What is that leaf thing on the side???

Insert various squealing over how cute the twins are

Me: Ben, how many times do we need to have this discussion about your suits? 1. Buttons, 2. If you're not wearing a tie, you don't do the buttons that high.

Ben and Mal: *discussing closing the Isle permanently* Bee: This argument makes no sense! It would make more sense the other way around Me: Its so out of character for the both of them

Audrey: *turns Mal into a hag* Me: I feel like we need to drink for that Mal: *speaks* Bee: I feel like we need to chug for that

Audrey: *singing Happy Birthday in cursive* Bee: Oh god, she's a theatre kid

Mal (returned to normal on the Isle): Evil magic doesn't work here! Me: See, they can never decide if they're gonna stick with that Bee: Follow your own fucking rules, I beg of you

Us noting how weird the movie is, like they're trying to be grittier but the script is the most "Disney Channel" the franchise had been at that point

Mal: How big is that dog? Bee: CAN I PET THAT DAAAWG

Bee: I think I am just the right amount of drunk to appreciate this movie for what it is

Bee: *about Hades* He is so hot Me: I would do ungodly things to that man- pun unintended

Me: Also, are we just gonna gloss over the fact that Mal is a fucking demigod???

Me: So the canon up until this point (implied in the movies and explicit in the books) is that none of the Villain kids know who their other parents are, and all Mal knew was that her father was human and Maleficent was ashamed of that

Me, two seconds later: Hades had two fairy demigod children; Mal Bertha and Nico Di Angelo Bee: *chokes on drink*

Bee: Now I know there's a dramatic song here because I vaguely remember a dramatic song- oh there it is

Bee: What. The fuck. Is happening? Me: Something I'm still way too sober for

Hades: If it gets wet, it's game over! Us, simultaneously: Me too- *wheezing laughter*

Audrey: Sleep is too good for you! Ben: *drops like a sack of potatoes* Bee: Oh shit, she killed him!

Octo-Uma: *exists* Bee: Oh the budget is back!

Uma: Guarantee me that every single villain kid that wants to can get off the Island Mal: I can't do that Me: You literally can? Bee: You're the queen??

Me: Harry's costume is the only one in this scene that I like Bee: You're right Me: He should be more tits out Bee: He should have a boob window!

Bee: She (Evie) would make a great preschool teacher

Audrey: *pets Chad* Bee: He's gonna have some interesting kinks to figure out when he's older

*In the hallway* Uma: Hold up! What's this? Bee: Bad set dressing?

Mal: I wonder what fried octopus tastes like? Bee: Like you haven't eaten her before Me: *chokes on drink*

Bee: Evie is literally just sitting there looking pretty and I respect the fuck out of her for that

*During Night Falls* Me: Did they say "bitch, splat?" Bee: I think they said "pitch black", but I also heard "bitch, splat" Me: That's a better lyric

Bee: Evie actually invented gentle parenting. I'd call her mommy Me:

Uma: *talking about Audrey after reading her diary* Bee: Oh, they're in love. Like I know they haven't met, but they're in love

Bee: Oh no, my lesbian! (note: I cannot for the life of me remember what the fucking context for this was)

*In Evie's sewing room* Me: PAUSE Bee: Oh, she's (Evie) so cute! Me: Oh, I was trying to see what kind of sewing machine that is, I think it's a pfaff Bee: ...Does that count as costuming? Me: Enough for a drink, yes- Oh actually, that might be a Bernina

Me (about Evie and Doug): "I miss Bee and [Husband]" "We have Bee and [Husband] at home" The Bee and [Husband] at home

*During the introduction of Beast!Ben* Bee: *incoherent screeching* Me: I think we need a chug for that Bee: I need to drink to forget, when will he go away?

Bee: ...I wasn't gonna say anything, but that's a butt plug tail

Jane: *appears* Me: My babygirl! Bee: She gets cuter every movie.

*@ Carlos* Bee: Puh-lease give her a little smooch Me: He's so smitten, it's disgusting

Harry: Hey Jay, uh, thanks for saving me, gorgeous face~ Me: HELLO??? Bee: GAY Me: I don't remember that, that might've been something that was cut from the Disney Channel release?

Harry: *smacks Jay's shoulder* Me: It only could've been better if he smacked his ass Bee: Oh, he definitely smacked his ass. I saw him smack his shoulder, but he smacked his ass

Bee: Through the power of lesbians and rhyming couplets!

Honorable mention: Us losing it over the VISIBLE LACE of Ben's shitty fake beard

Bee: Chad was a better character in the first movie where he was kinda dumb but conniving, but now he's just dumb

(About My Once Upon a Time) Me: This song is from a better movie Bee: Right like holy shit??? This is a mid-act-two power ballad on Broadway. The way I would scream this in my car.

(Side note: the verses of the song felt out of order to me. Turns out it's sung in a different order in the movie than it is on the soundtrack)

Bee: There's something really gross about this dragon model and I can't put my finger on it Me: It looks wet Bee: Yeah! It- oh. Oh it, uh. It looks like a "bad dragon". If you catch my drift. Me: ...I'd like to go home now

Audrey: *comatose* Me: WHAT is that cover??? Bee: Is that a shroud??? Me: They changed her! They put in the effort to put her in pjs but turning her covers down was too much? Was that too inappropriate??? Bee: They left her feet uncovered!!! Dogs out for free on the Disney Channel!

Me: Another fit in which Ben needs a tie

Me (@ Hades): Dad, more like- no. Bee: Dad, more like daddy!!! I'll say it, I have enough daddy issues to Me: Bee, no

Bee: Why do they (Hades and Mal) love each other now? This relationship is unearned

Bee: (@ Beast) You gave the kingdom to a sixteen year-old, you can shut the fuck up

Jay: *making very romantic-sounding plans with Gil* Me: Which ear is the gay ear? Bee: I think it's the left??? (after Googling) No, it's the right Me: Jay has had an earring in the gay ear and only the gay ear this whole movie Bee: *screeching*

Me: In a better version of this movie, Lonnie has been here teasing the fuck out of him (Jay) about Gil the whole movie and then she eggs him to ask him out now.

Bad note for costumes, Uma is wearing a repainted Amazon corset in the final number. So much for Disney money and this movie having a bigger budget

Hades: Am I invited to the wedding? Bee: No, go away

Speaking of the wedding, we took a brief interlude there before Rise of Red

[foap-enjoyer]

Branding | Scarring | Collar

Collar.

'Soap's been captured. Turns out this time, the torture is... a little different than he's used to.'

Trigger warnings for this prompt: Vomit, starvation. Ships for this prompt: Ghoap. Word count: Around 3000/4000

Read it here, on AO3: Ouch. - Chapter 7 - Tsukuyomi_Ravioli - Call of Duty (Video Games) [Archive of Our Own]

Wrote this incredibly sick, I love October but holy SHIT.

~

Chained, collared, and left out in the cold. Like an animal. Like a literal dog. 

This wasn't weird at all...

No, no it was very much weird.

The SAS trained him for all sorts, back when he was a rookie. All stereotypical shit you see in movies. Waterboarding, nail pulling, neck slashing, and so forth. But being treated like a mutt wasn't in the field manual. At least, not in the one he read.

Sitting ass first in wet, freezing mud sucked in any circumstance, but was, also, common. Being a soldier and all. They ended up in the mud nine times out of ten on missions, and in training, too. He can still remember crawling under barbed wire fences in the rain and sitting on his backside in the mud staring up at his supervisor waiting for instructions.

But, unlike those times, these pricks had gone ahead and done something a… little unexpected. Stolen his clothes right off of his fucking back, leaving him practically naked. At least they’d been courteous enough to let him keep his skivvies. Not that the soaked, once-blue fabric felt much better against his skin than nothing at all.

Oh, and the collar, of course. How could he forget the collar?

It was one of those old, worn leather collars made for ‘intimidating’ dogs. Little metal studs, not long enough to be of use circled his neck, complete with a little dog-tag. How nice. If he tilted his head down slightly, he could just make out the ‘name’ he’d been given: Bitch. How flattering!

The collar itself wrapped snug against his Adam's apple, a little hoop at the back connecting him to a nearby pole, stood tall and strong in contrast to the rest of the barren wasteland of a base. He was awkwardly connected to it through a metal chain, a huge one that he’s certain isn’t for dogs, much less humans, given that his neck tilted to the side with the sheer weight. Certainly good news for his posture, no doubt. 

The pole didn’t just work as a chaining post for just him, of course. This was where they put all the dogs of the camp. Actual dogs, this time. He, as far as he knew, was the only human here. There were several poles, dotted around the base from what he heard, and his was known as ‘number seven’. It housed three other dogs, all anti-social little fuckers who coiled up as far as their chains could go, snarling and growling at anything that moved.

There was, actually, a kennel too. A nice little semi-dry spot, built of sticks and logs, for him to relax, except that was located at the base of the pole. Which wouldn’t be a problem given his grouchy neighbours if it weren’t for the one large, huge, brown-tan muscular dog that resided there. He supposed it was like… an alpha? Either way it scared the shit out of him enough that he much preferred his spot in the freezing mud.

He fucking hated dogs. His one weakness. Hell, his ‘kryptonite’, if you will. Terrified the shit out of him ever since he was a youngin. He was never able to shake the terror out from his heart, and he kind of liked it that way. Any other person probably would have sauntered right over to the ‘cute little puppy’ and lost their face for it. Not him. 

Of course, this meant that the shelter was out of bounds. Which was just fine by him. It was his only choice in this whole situation, and he was glad to have it. He’d rather not lie down with literal dogs and risk losing his manhood or something, thanks to ‘Buddy’ or ‘Chief’ feeling a little peckish while he slept.

So here he sat, trembling like a flag in the wind, soaked to the bone, watching this dog nap peacefully out of the storm, save for its face and tail, exposed out of the small tunnel that made up the kennel. That brought some sort of sick pleasure to him. He was glad the dog was suffering at least a little, like the rest of them.

Made him almost feel happy about having his fellow shelter-less neighbours. Dogs or not.

Anyway. 

Days in the camp, usually, went a little like this:

He would wake up to the howling, barking, and snarling of dogs. Of course. Following that rude awakening, he would peel himself off of the dirty ground underneath him and await food. Not that he ever actually got food. Only ‘good’ dogs got food, and he didn’t qualify, apparently.

But if he was honest, he was kind of glad. The slop the mutts were served was, frankly, disgusting. It was brown, and sludgy,  and kind of looked like shit, if he was honest. Probably tasted like it too. 

At least, that’s what he tried to tell himself watching them all happily scarf it down like it was the finest of dining, licking frantically until it was sparkling clean, not a dot of slop left. They probably didn’t even clean the bowls, now that he thought about it. Not when the dogs were constantly on the verge of hunger. Which was yet another thing to add to his checklist of being grateful he didn’t have to eat that crap. 

Next, after breakfast, well… He would just… sit there. 

What else was there to do? He sometimes would check the chain, check his collar, look for some sort of wear or tear in the fabric and the metal. Or sometimes, when he was too exhausted to look, he would simply hold the chain up. Give his poor neck a break from snapping awkwardly to the side under the weight. It left little relief, so he usually resorted to laying down, curled on his side just like his dog friends. 

Once every few days, someone would come and collect him. He’d be forced to waddle on all fours into one of the houses that the people owned, like a literal mutt. They led him to the same room practically every time; the dining quarters. Full of men and women alike, munching down on mouth-watering food. Literally. His mouth would salivate as soon as he even saw the doors to the room. Pavlov would be proud, that stupid psychologist. 

There, they would chain him to a table leg, and then they would eat their lunch. 

If he tried to stand? Hit. Tried to grab some of the food from above? Hit. Hell, if they dropped something, and he deemed it free-dibs, he was hit. He just had to sit there on aching knees and watch them eat meal after meal. People laughed at him, kicked him when they walked past, teased food right above his face, and he just had to take it, or face being hit. Hit even more than he was already, really. 

Starvation was a big issue for him, at this point, but not an issue he was unfamiliar with. He knew it all too well, a common tactic for interrogating soldiers. He knew this was their plan from the get go, and he’d been more than prepared mentally, but being around food so much was hard. Watching the dogs eat their sludge had been hard enough, and now he had to smell and see real human food. Burgers, hotdogs, chips, pizza. Not to mention the fact that the only drink to relieve his raspy throat he ever got was when it rained and he stuck his tongue out. They had Cola in here, Fanta, lemonade, water, squash. Coffee, too. Anything and everything.

“Does the puppy want some?” A woman cooed, waving a half-eaten sausage back and forth in front of him like a hypnosis. When he didn’t budge, the only thing to move being his eyes to follow the food, she laughed. “The puppy knows tricks.” She looked back up to the rest of the people at the table. She reached down to tussle his wet, mucky hair. Overgrown from his time out away from a good pair of scissors. “Its learnt to stay!”

The table erupted into laughter, and one man stood up, moving over to him. He kneeled down, a slice of pizza in his hand. A sliver, not enough to satisfy even an ant, but a slice nonetheless. “You hungry, mutt?”

He wasn’t going to give it to him, so what was the point? He simply stared forward blankly. He was too exhausted for this, his head hurt, his whole body hurt. He just wanted to be taken back outside.

“Hey.” A click of the fingers and he was back in the world of the living. The man was still there, eyes serious. “You can have it.”

He curled a brow. Seriously?

The man grinned, lifting the slice up before spitting a wad of saliva onto it, holding it out once more, tossing it to rest between his knees on the dirty floor. “Here you go!”

.

He was so tired.

He wasn’t sure how long he’d been here for now; starvation curled around his mind like a coiled snake, stealing any rational thoughts. 

It was watering him down, he realised. Watering him down to a dog, like the rest of the mutts around him.

When was the last time he’d spoken? Eaten? Drank?

When was the last time he was held?

He wanted to be held. He wanted someone to curl their arms around him and tell him everything would be okay. He would even be okay with the dogs, he just needed something living, breathing. Something that had an ounce of love left in it, at this point.

He’d tried, once, to get closer to one of his neighbours, out of sheer desperation and loneliness. He had a nice bite mark to the left arm to thank for his troubles. At least, he assumed he did, he was covered in enough mud that no matter how much he swiped at it, it never revealed the wound underneath. But he could feel it, aching and hurting. Got a glimpse of blood sometimes, through the muck. 

At least this experience had sort of cured his fear of dogs momentarily. He supposed that was kind of cool.

.

He was getting sick. 

He wasn’t too sure what from; be it the cold, the mud, his wound, the starvation, the dehydration. Whatever it was, it was making him ill. Making him vomit. Not that he brought up anything but bile.

Turns out, though, that bile works sort of as good as water. Not that he would swallow it again, fuck no, he wouldn’t stoop that low. The bile helped him weaken the mud clung to his skin. Allowed him to get a look at that arm wound finally.

Yeah, it wasn’t looking good.

Red, raised, and bumpy. Yellow goo oozed out of the ragged puncture marks left behind, red mixed in. Blood, he realised. He could’ve cried. What if that dog had rabies? Was he going to die?

He could have laughed, actually- because only now did he think about death? Typical John Mactavish. 

Thinking about death made him remember that he had a team. A team that would come and get him. 

They’d find him, they’d save him.

Right?

.

.

He was right. Of course he was right, he was John ‘Soap’ fucking Mactavish! Sergeant of 141. Fuck the odds!

His team came for him, they came, they came, they came, they came. They were here. Somewhere here, only metres from him. 

He could hear them, hear gunshots; screaming and shouting. The dogs had all risen with the change in normalcy, barking and yapping and howling in confusion and fear. Even little old ‘Buddy’ as he’d named him, that big fucker hogging the kennel, had moved to peer at the windows as they shattered from sprayed bullets. At the people sprinting for their lives out the doors, whizzing past them.

He grinned tiredly.

It was 141. It had to be.

It was his team. His team, all his, they’d come for him. They were taking him home. He was going home. Today, not tomorrow, not next week, not ever, but today.

He was so fucking exhausted.

He’d just rest his head for a moment, on the ground. That wouldn’t be too bad. They would find him, surely. He was the only non-dog here suffering, after all. 

They’d find him. He trusted them.

.

.

.

“-oap, Soap. Soap-” Hands over his face, his eyes, his cheeks. He groaned. 

“Fuck,” Someone hissed, and fingers jabbed themselves into his neck, attempting to wiggle between the leather and his skin. It was fruitless, he had tried himself. “Get this collar off of him.”

“I don’t have any bolt-cutters, sir. Ghost has them.”

“Alright, alright. Simon? I need you over here, stat.”

 A voice, static-y and far away, “You find him?”

“Yeah.” The voice breathed out, relieved. “Yeah, we found him alright. East side. Need your set of cutters.”

“He awake?”

“Going in and out at the minute.” A hand softly rubbed at his shabby hair. “Soap?”

A wisp of a grunt. “On my way.”

He blinked an eye open. It was Gaz’s face to greet him, eyes wide with adrenaline and worry. Instantly, upon seeing his own, they softened. Another hand reached for him, cupping his cheek. “Soap.”

Price bombarded himself into the picture a moment later.  “Son.”

He felt hot tears well up, dripping down his cheeks. Price ever-so-gently wiped them away. “It’s okay.” He promised, “We have you now.”

Soap let out a raspy sob, reaching a hand upwards desperately for the older man, but he couldn’t. It fell short, trembling and weak. He was exhausted beyond belief after God knows how many days out here. 

Price was there, however. Of course he was, and quickly took his hand into his own, rubbing over his muddied knuckles. “You’re alright, son.” He soothed, “You’re alright.”

His eyes began to close once more, but Gaz tapped his dusty forehead. “Don’t sleep, Soap.” Concerned eyes met his own when he blinked them back open. “Don’t. Ghost’ll be here soon, okay?”

“Si’?” He coughed, chest seizing at the simple word. He curled in on himself, groaning. 

Gaz’s hand moved to rub against his back. “Yeah.” He promised, “Ghost is here.”

As if on cue, footsteps thundered against the dirt, sprinting directly towards them. It stirred the dogs back up, snapping and growling at whoever had dared come into their territory. 

A hand quickly fell onto his shoulder, hard. A more gentle one on his head, turning him slightly from where he lay on his side, facing him to the sky. He blinked.

“Johnny.” Ghost’s voice was impossibly watery. Thick with emotion. It was unlike him to be so open in public. The big softie.

He cracked a soft smile up at the masked man, “Si’.”

“We need to get this thing off.” Price was explaining to Ghost as the man kneeled down, Soap’s own head resting on the dirt between the man’s knees, almost. 

Gloved hands touched his neck. Ghost shook his head, frustrated. “No can do. Too close to his skin.” He explained to the others, rather than to Soap. He couldn’t blame him though, what use was he in this situation? “I can cut the chain, though. For now.”

Price nodded, still stroking the skin of Soap’s knuckles, “Yeah, that works.”

“What’re we gonna do with all these dogs, Cap?” Gaz piped up, peering at the snarling mutts. “There’s so many of them.”

Price shrugged, “Shelter, probably. Though I doubt they’ll find homes. They look downright feral.”

Soap almost felt bad for what were soon to be his ex-neighbours. 

Almost.

The chain was cut with a quick snap, and he was free.

Hands were helping him up before he could even process this. He stumbled once his feet were under him. Nausea coiled in his stomach and he leaned over, arms still holding him up, to dry heave into the dirt. Almost dry heave, he clearly still had some bile to at least vomit back up. It hit the floor sickeningly. It made him want to puke more just watching it.  

Price let out a soft wounded noise, rubbing his shoulder. “It’s alright, son, take your time.”

He coughed, wheezing. Ghost was on his left. He watched him move in the corner of his vision, almost in slow-motion, adjusting his grip slightly and-

He yelped, like an actual dog, flinching away from the man’s touch as gloved nails pressed into the wound hidden under mud and muck. He watched as hurt flashed in Simon’s eyes, tears in his own as he held back a sob. I’m sorry, he wanted to cry out, I’m sorry, I’m sorry-

“Nevermind.” Price said curtly, “We need to get him out of here. Now.”

.

“Alright, love, let's get this off you.”

He clutched onto Simon’s hand as the doctor moved, hands searching the endless amount of drawers until she came up successful, holding a pair of fabric cutters. She held them out for Soap to see. “I’ll use these, okay?” She said softly, kindly, “I’ll just ease it in the gap between the collar and off it comes. Is that okay with you?”

He nodded, and she smiled, scooting forward on her wheelie-chair so she was in front of him. “Good, good.” She peered up at Ghost next to him like his deathly shadow. “Can you hold the collar for me?”

“Gotcha.” Ghost’s hands wrapped around his neck first, stretching the fabric sideways to attempt to make a gap. He coughed as it pressed against his throat uncomfortably.

“Alright” The doctor said as she began to work. “Looks to be a big enough gap here...” He could feel metal worming its way against his skin. He fought to hold himself still. “You’re doing great.” She encouraged, “Aaaanddd-”

Snip!

Slowly, painfully so, the thing was pulled from his skin.

She winced, blowing out a breath. In her hands, the dirty fabric. “Hell of a mark you got there, soldier.” She held up the collar for him to take. When Ghost glared at her, she chuckled, “Souvenir?” 

He took it in shaking hands. It rested on his lap heavily.

His eyes bore holes into it as Ghost’s fingers came to rest on the back of his neck, beginning to rub at the marks adorning his skin. 

He was truly free.

His eyes welled up with tears, and he choked on a sob.

She smiled sadly, moving to stand, aiming for the door. “I’ll give you two a moment.”

As soon as the door shut with a soft click, tears were streaming down his face.

Ghost’s fingers caught them gently. “Sweetheart?”

Soap dove for the man, curling into him with a wail.

Strong hands enclosed around him. A soft voice in his ear. “I’ve got you.” he promised wetly, “I’ve got you, I’ve got you.”

“I’m free?” He choked, like it was a question. Like it was something he couldn’t quite believe yet.

“You’re free.” A kiss on his head. “You’re free, love.”

“I’m free.”

[tomfoolies]

begin again

ship: corporate affairs words: 722 a/n: finally, here's the tomja s4 finale fic that i promised!! i actually wrote most of this all the way back in june when i finished my first rewatch, so it's about time i posted it <3 definitely more stream of consciousness kinda writing than what i usually do, but i had fun with it and i hope you like it too :3

--

Tom did it. The impossible, the unachievable. Something he once thought he’d never want to do, let alone be capable of doing.

Once again he was at a crossroads, two distinct lifes ahead of him. A lot of those happened in these past few years, he muses. Constant choice-making, choosing sides, chasing coattails and proclaiming his usefulness to anyone willing to take him on. But the hunt has grown stale, apprehensive, even terrifying in certain moments. 

He looked around the place, one pretentious establishments amongst the others, recalled the time he sat across Kendall, in a situation all too similar; being wooed for his loyalty that seems to have always felt easy for others to win, because he should’ve felt lucky that he was even being wanted in the first place. He looked at Mattson, the man who had now revealed his plans to him after what he thought was just something for entertainment, for evaluation. In his mind, Logan’s dead body on the airplane floor, a divination of things to come if he decided to walk down that path. I grind because I worry – it’s the truth, and it would’ve been the death of him. 

On the surface, his fears, his makeshift predictions. And at the heart of it all, her. 

“You know Sonja would respect you much more if you decided to help me out…” The memory of Kendall’s words resurface, the way he flashed the information like valuable cards in the intensely complex game they’ve played for years now without ever really knowing the rules. “Because she already did just that. Didn't she tell you? I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for her.”

He hadn’t given Kendall the satisfaction of being surprised. Of feeling some sort of betrayal. Of thinking about it, even if only for the briefest of moments. But he knew he’d get fucked, Sonja knew he’d get fucked. It wasn’t a viable choice. 

Sonja waits for him at their apartment, but anticipation and trepidation greet him first when he unlocks the door. Only after that comes her, in her anxious stance with her arms crossed, her shuffling walk. She'd turned in her resignation just a few days ago, waiting for this moment and its consequences with baited breath. The dogs feel the tension too, gingerly pad over to smell their dad to see if he’s changed. If he’s still the same Tom from before. 

Watching her now, with a dizzying sense of freedom in his chest he doesn’t ever remember feeling, he knows that today’s choice wasn’t one to begin with. Ironically, when it’s exactly what she taught him; the knowledge that he always has an opportunity to choose differently. But maybe with it, also the ability to know when there is only one road to take. 

She doesn’t have to ask. He gives her his answers with honesty that still humiliates him sometimes. 

“He wanted me to step up, take on the mantle. But I said no,” he says, and watches her face change. From confusion to clarity. “I'm done.”

Just like the first time, their beginning that feels so long ago that they must've lived lifetimes since. When he came to find her after a fight that left him reeling and relieved and with the taste of deliverance, telling her he’d ended things with Shiv. Sonja had been waiting for him, the tension between them had come to a standstill and had to be resolved. They’d both felt it, and everything around them conspired to make their collision happen. That time it ended with her body against his, as fast and as fervently as possible with the realization that there is something between them that can’t be quelled. 

Perhaps later tonight they will do that, too. But now her arms wrap around him and she sighs her relief into his collarbone and he buries his face in her hair. Caught in a moment where it’s just the two of them, the rest of the world gone somewhere else at last. 

She pulls back to look at him, almost like seeing him in a new light, cradling his face in her hands and then she’s pulling him under and he takes to it gladly, their foreheads touching. 

Something unknown yet great is right at his fingertips. He decides to grasp it with both hands.

[nevvaraven]

At least I’ve got you

Regulus keeps getting surprise visits from a dog? 

“Oh for fucks sake- REG! Your stupid dog’s back.”  

“How many times do I have to remind you that he’s not mine?”  

“Well maybe try reminding him, this is the like the tenth time he’s wandered in here now!”

Regulus peeks his head out of the bathroom to see Barty angrily stuffing the contents of his desk into his book bag, whilst simultaneously sending irritated looks over to the familiar black dog now resting casually on Regulus’ bed.  

The dog bares his teeth and growls slightly towards Barty when Regulus finally steps out but the minute he does so, the dog’s head snaps towards him with an excited bark, and any previous aggression vanishes as his tail begins to wag.  

“I’m going to the library with Evan, I’ll see you later.” Barty huffs out, practically stomping out the room, “and that thing better be gone when I get back!”

The door slams on his way-out causing Regulus to roll his eyes, and if he didn’t know any better he’d say the dog lets out a little huff of laughter at Barty’s dramatic exit.  

“Back again, are we?” Regulus asks approaching the now clearly appeased animal with a soft smile. The familiar creature lets his tongue wag out and smiles widely as Regulus begins stroking his head.

He isn’t quite sure where exactly the dog always come from.  

The first time Regulus ever saw him was after one of the less fortunate quidditch games a few weeks ago, they had lost rather pathetically, and he had stayed behind in the changing rooms not wanting to deal with the aftermath of it all.  

He remembers it had been a particularly rough day, with not only his mother having sent him a humiliating howler at breakfast about not screwing up at his game but also since it had been Sirius’ birthday. Regulus had refused to even glance in his direction following the silence after the howler had ripped itself to shreds but he knew he was watching him, half the bloody hall was, he just couldn’t bring himself to look back. Too afraid of what would follow, what he would see.  

Afraid it would be a stranger.

He knew perfectly well the extent to which he was no longer a part of Sirius’ life, he didn’t need the reminders.  

Regulus had been sat in the changing rooms long after everyone else had already left, head in hands and still in his kit when the dog had wandered in, at first he had looked around in confusion wondering where the owner was, but no one had followed the animal in. And when the dog placed its head on his lap, Regulus felt no desire to really go looking.  

It was sort of ridiculous but in that moment, Regulus had needed someone, anyone really, to prove to him he wasn’t as alone in this world as he felt. The whole day had felt like one punch after another, and for whatever reason, when the dog looked up at him, it felt like he understood. Like he was telling him it was all going to be ok. He knows logically that can’t be true but, in the moment, he felt some odd form kinship with the dog. And call him crazy but he thinks the dog felt it too. Why else would he keep coming back?

Ever since that day whenever Regulus has had a bad enough day that he can’t hide it in his expression, the dog always somehow shows up and offers him that small amount of comfort that keeps him from feeling like he’s fallen over the edge. It didn’t make sense then and it doesn’t make sense now but for better or worse this dog has managed to keep finding his way back to Regulus when he needs him, and Regulus has undoubtedly grown very attached to him.  

He tried hard not to, but these days there aren’t a lot of people he feels comfortable talking to about the things that play on his mind, and something about the dog just makes him feel safe enough to open up in a way he just can’t seem to with anyone else.  

“How do you even get in here?” Regulus asks lying down next to him.  

The dog responds by placing its head softly on his shoulder.

“I feel like I should have a name for you by now.” Regulus says laying his head against the dog, “never really been quite good at names though,” Regulus murmurs stroking the dog’s head, “how do you feel about.....Noir?”  

The dog lets out a huff in response.  

“Ok clearly not,” Regulus laughs, the smile dying on his face when the next thought appears, “you know who’s great at names? Sirius.”

The dog’s ears perk up at that, they always seem to whenever he mentions his brother. He had been on Regulus’ mind all day, they had run into each other in the hallway earlier and Sirius had been holding hands with that friend he’s always staring at, Lupin. They looked at each other in a way that friends just don’t. It was so plainly obvious. To all of them it seemed since Sirius had ripped his hand away the second he had spotted Regulus. Regulus had immediately turned in the opposite and despite hearing his brother call for him, he had continued walking.  

He knew. Of course he knew. But he wasn’t going to be able to say the right things. He never has. So he’d rather say nothing at all now. It’s easier this way, spilling his heart out to an animal who doesn’t really comprehend anything he says.  

It’s not real.

“He used to play this game when we were younger,” Regulus starts as the dog perks up, “where he’d look out the window and make up stories for every person who walked by the street, he’d give them names and backstories and explain why they were out that day, it was all so ridiculous. He used to do it to cheer me up whenever mother got angry.” Regulus feels tears begin to prick in the corners of his eyes as the longing for a person who no longer thinks of him begins to build up in him, “I still do it sometimes, when I go home. I try to think of the kind of stories he’d make up for people but they’re never as good. One time this kid with long hair walked past and I nearly ran outside because I thought it was him,” Regulus laughs through his tears at the absurdity of it. “It wasn’t.”  

When he looks back at the dog he’s surprised to see there are tears in his eyes as well.  

“It’s ok,” Regulus whispers, stroking him again in what he hopes is a comforting motion, “I actually saw him today.”  

The dog raises his head from his shoulder to look down at him, eyes unblinking. 

“I think he’s happy. He looked happy.” Regulus admits, the dog looks away from him for the first time and gazes towards the window, “I didn’t know what to say to him, I know he must’ve been scared not knowing what I was thinking, but I’ve never known what to do with his fear. Which is a shame since he always knew exactly what to do with mine.”

The dog looks back at him then, he almost looks sad.  

“I don’t think I’ll ever get to tell him, but I’m glad he’s happy. Even if I don’t get to be a part of any of it.” Regulus whispers, “one of us should be.”  

The dog whines and for a moment Regulus thinks he’s crying. The sight of it for some reason is too much for Regulus to handle.  

“I think you should get going buddy,” Regulus says wiping at his own and sitting up, “Barty and Evan will be back soon, and I don’t think they’ll be as happy to see you as I am.”

The dog sniffles and crawls into his lap, his front paws come all the way up to Regulus’ shoulders and he leans his head against Regulus’ chest. There’s only one person Regulus has ever accepted a hug from and as he sits there in his room holding on to the small creature that can’t possibly understand the comfort he provides him, Regulus wishes not for the first time, that his brother was here. 

“It’s ok,” Regulus whispers into the dog’s fur, “at least I’ve got you.”  

[rune-chaser]

OC question time!

Are there any songs that you strongly associate with any of your OCs?

OC(s) of your choice has been given 50 of their world’s monies. What are they spending it on? (If their world has different tiers of money, i.e. gold and silver coins, go with the higher value currency)

Do any of your OCs have pets?

And finally, just anything you would like to share about them in general :)

1)

There are a few actually! I'll try and grab some from an array of folks!

Marin: You all know her I've shared I think Fight Song by The Stanfields before, as well as Bad Influence by P!nk SO I'm gonna share another one that inspired the Icon I made for her playlist after like 4 years of having no icon Pink Panther by Scene Queen: https://open.spotify.com/track/32ljWqOxw3ckyuaUc882F6?si=ce75c6f7bc8946be

Sunita: You also Know Her I'm actually gonna share a song for her that is very very early on in her playlist! the 4th one added, because it's a song that I so heavily associate it with her I have a very hard time putting it to other characters. I Found by Amber Run: https://open.spotify.com/track/5zT5cMnMKoyruPj13TQXGx?si=f408015ff7a64533

Lake: THE NARRATIVE'S (my) FAVORITE I like her so much and she is so special to me and I plan on putting her through the wringer because I love her. THAT BEING SAID! bet you'll get off on this by Xana: https://open.spotify.com/track/73RMaD9aBr66HauQdertbc?si=2528b5cdc9f948de

Lord Huron: They are the big bad of my dnd campaign! Based on The Most Dangerous Game! This song I actually thumbnailed a good 40 seconds of an animatic to hehe Go Get Your Gun by The Dear Hunter: https://open.spotify.com/track/3JdJIrVP3QBSA8L1RSdUho?si=012dfef3ff89487d

Alani: The Captain that got them all into the mess of my dnd campaign! She's the captain of the ship that sunk getting to Tiamat's Maw (where Lord Huron resides, not that anyone knew that at the time) And I just really like it for her : ) Save Ship, Harbored by The Crane Wives: https://open.spotify.com/track/7EX8XCuQF5YlozMjNedoez?si=33fa94bd896b4f90

AND THE REST UNDER A READ MORE CAUSE WE ALREADY GOT LONG

2) We'll go with Alani again! Since the Alazarian world is about the only story place I have the money really matters, Song of Blood may also but I haven't developed it enough to be mindful about it.

50 gold can sometimes be a drop in the bucket with things, so I'll go with Platinum! which would be a higher value of things. But that can go a LONG way when supplying for a ship! Food Rations and even pay for her crew! But she would more than likely use it for supplies to keep her crew happy and safe, And should she see that there is enough left over after that to distribute, well should she be so fortunate to have the extra, why not share it around and pay the crew a bit more?

3) Lyric does! Huron too by a technicality.

Lyric however is a ranger, so they have an animal companion! A Hunter's Griffon that they named Cross! He's a lil guy a bit larger than the average cat! He's a very good tracker as well and helps Lyric out a lot on scouting around home and other places!

Huron has a bunch of Hounds! if you've read the story there's hunting dogs and Huron has those too! Like, A lot. Too many I think but A LOT. She's curated what's been desired of her hunting dogs to bite bite kill kill or maybe just be really really fast! He also has Guard Drakes that are, by a technicality, pets.

4) Wildcard

I actually wanna talk about Song of Blood a bit because I'm currently taking a nail file to it. and trying to slap some clay on it to mold it to what I want.

Specifically I wanna talk about this guy a tad : ) It's Naomi's dad!!!! When it wants to walk around looking a lil more human, because it's dragon form is a bit more fucked up. Series of images below of the most recent pass at its design : )

[gaming-thoughts-by-an-idiot]

Fable 3, fuck Logan, lil bitch

Game: do u want to be Prince or Princess?

Me: I'd like to be the third secret sex

Game: what?

Me: THE MAIN CHARACTER

Game: y-yes that's-

Me: WHO GONNA SAVE THE WORLD

Game: that's what the sex-

Me: gotta go girl, boys are so obvious, he's gonna be all proper

Game: have u ever met a man...?

Me: girls are so badass, just look at Buffy

Game:...

Me:...

"Ready to see my man... the bastard Reaver"

"Damn, the city sure got bigger in like 20? Years"

"The hen tried to fly but couldn't but they can actually fly so we were all lied to"

"Damn, children working..."

"I cant remember this part of my castle"

"Holy shit it's fucking huge omg"

"Hehe that's what she said"

"That feather had plans"

"Ew look at that hat"

"Damn my dog could've been prettier"

"Pff, do u wanna look princess-y or cool"

"Obviously I'm picking the short and movable one"

"I fucking LOVE Jasper"

"I'm standing still, I wanna hear his comments to it"

"What happens if I try to leave in my pjs"

"He just went 'are u sure?' "

"Damn, he just threw a word at me that idk what means, but I think its like 'silly' "

"I look so pretty- wtf is that hair?"

"Jasper said avoid my brother, but what kind of sister would I be if I did?"

"I'm glad the princess can talk"

"Lmao I just had like the most gangsta handshake with a guard love it"

"I'm so happy I get to pet my dog, not a fan of how she sounds tho"

"Oh wait, I think maybe since I'm playing 3rd on xbox one, but did the 2nd on 360, maybe I won't have the queen but default king..."

"I'm just walking around shaking people's hands"

"Elliot is such a.... name, and- wait... who's gonna be the girl if I'm playing as him???"

"Next time..."

"I will be EVIL and idk why that's a guy"

"Hohoho I kissed the man"

"The city doesn't look like my city :( or... are we not in bowerstone, was that the name? Jesus, I've played the 2nd game for so long and I've forgotten"

"I love we're holding hands"

"I love Walter"

"Oh no my Prince, he ran away"

Walter: I want u to fight me, like your life dependent on it

Me: wow, that doesn't sound like a tutorial at all

"I'm gonna fuck up the buttons"

"Hell ye I did not"

"Damn, thought I should end the game here so I could sleep, but apparently you can't until a spesific place in the game... oh nooo, I have to do my fave hobby? Terrible:)"

"Running with my bois<3"

"There were NOT this many doors in my castle"

"The default is king :/"

"Imo king is so vanilla, like you don't give the same respect as a queen"

"All my hard work of being a queen just gone"

"Basically next time I'm doing it all on xbox one"

"Right, war room"

"Listening in"

"Damn, I'd be upset too if I was Logan, if I had that haircut"

"Oh, same throne at least"

"Ah... here comes the choice"

"Well, as the queen... I'm a good person... until I charge rent ofc haha"

"Bye baby :("

"He loves me😭"

"My MOTHER'S daughter, thank u very much"

Game: the hero was your dad

Me: what was that?

Game: I said the her-

Me: sounded like the wind

Game: tHE HE-

Me: whatever it was, it was saying bs... I miss my queen

Game: u know what? Fuck it.

"Run run run- Where's my dog btw?"

"Oh nevermind"

"Ugh, we're gonna look at the imposter, the king"

"I mean technically, Reaver IS a hero, he's just a bad one"

"Did Logan also go through the whole grab seal, end up in front of Theresa?"

"The seer of the SPIRE???"

"The queen would've fucking whipped Logan's ass if she knew"

"I'm sensing the fanfic energy... not from that Logan thing but for Reaver"

"I'm such a simp"

"For these terrible men...

"And my queen"

"You guided my MOTHER"

"What does Theresa even do in her spare time? I bet she crochets"

"I got a glove that let's me use magic... can anyone say Link? Cuz im getting Link vibes"

"OH FOR FUCKS SAKE, STOP RUNNING IN MY WAY, YA BASTARD DOG"

"Do I get to name my hero? Or am I cursed to see 'hero' every time she speaks?"

"Do I get to name my dog?"

"Isn't the dog supposed bark when there's treasure close by? Cuz I only found that key cuz of my own memory"

"Jasper is scared of bats, he'd make a terrible batman"

Walter: did u see that Jasper???

Jasper: indeed your MOTHER would've been very proud

"Why can't I run"

"Did the queen make these tunnels?"

"What happens if I don't buy the castle in the second game?"

"Can I slut around in this game too?"

"Like mother like daughter, or is it like daughter like mother? I honestly don't know"

"What's with the gift in the symbol in the corner?"

"Thought all the transportation gates were all gone, I'm pretty sure I'm on one"

"Oh wow, look at all that winter. Just like norway"

"I can make friends by shaking hands"

"I'm gonna make everyone love me with how great I am with my hands"

"For handshakes, I meant handshakes"

"I forgot I had to go back to sanctuary to change, which is much better than just changing out into the open imo"

"Oh hell yea! Look at all those gifts!"

"Bleh the outfit is... yeah"

"Dog potion? For what?

"Pink poodle"

"Doberman"

"White poodle... who wants a poodle?"

"Clockwork dog potion??? What does that even mean???"

"Setter dog potion??? What"

"Five star dog potion...?"

"That's all the gifts, i wanted a gift for myself"

"AWW I GOING WITH ALSATIAN DOG, LOOKS LIKE A GERMAN SHEPHERD OMG"

"I CAN NAME THE DOG"

"should be something fun-.... hehe"

"Betcha u can guess"

"I'm giving 10 coins to everyone, I have 129 left"

"Damn, 20coins left"

"Gotta talk to the man with the small fish name"

"What are those jester shoes"

"My mom, the queen, was busy for like 20 or something years..."

"Oh! I'm getting more gifts!"

"They better be for me istg"

"I went into a sink hole water thing and found a wedding ring"

"I think a fish is proposing to me"

"Ooo, dye"

"Are all my packages dye?"

"Tattoo set, nothing says rebel as much as this, I just got out of the castle"

"Bushy hairstyle"

"Bowerstone soldier uniform...???"

"Yule costume lmao"

"Silly outfits, dye and hair types, oh and that tattoo set"

"Out to explore more!"

[jiminy-crickets]

faceoff episode one thoughts and opinions <3333

YESSSS right off the bat willy is walking around Toronto with his dogs, fuck YES!!

YES PUT THE TORONTO MEDIA CIRCUS ON BLAST!!!!!!

also fucking hell, when dear god WHEN will we as a society escape biz nasty. grow up!!!!!! YOUR NAME IS PAUL!!!!!

"This place is the only place that has been home for me. Like, ive never spent so much time in one place in my life"........... william........ i am holding you gently in my hands baby.

Willy absolutely stunting on those kids, also... It is almost pathetic just how romance-horny i get seeing people being nice to kids. like, i love kids, i hope to have a bunch one day, and it makes me so frustrated to see how angry so many young people get when children dare to exist in public (like, i get being annoyed at a crying baby on a plane, but when you are giving dirty looks at a parent and a kid who are just existing in public fuck off, fuck right off with that)

also i love the shot of the puppies looking at willy and the kids in the doorway onto the ice.

like once again, seeing pasta call his kid "boss" and taking her out to the aquarium... man i love that, like pasta if you want a second 'wife' lmk!!

augh!!!!! the shots of baby pasta and baby willy!!!! TINY BABIES!!!! widde iddy bitty boys!!!

oh fuck dead dad talk.... oh, i don't. i really hope this episode isnt sad for very long because uh.... i fucking buried my grandmother on Wednesday, i can't deal with sad shit rn.

oh okay, dead dad talk is over now, yippee. but also, yikes.

the dinner together is really sweet, it does you know... feel very performative since there are cameras, but its still nice.

okay the cut from willy being like all like 'i hate playing you because we loose' to boston winning 4-1, is MUAH chefs kiss

okay, time skip to the playoffs, i knew it had to happen, but wow. bit of a jolt to the system.

i am not a leafs FAN, i am a leafs appreciator, and so... i welcome any and all footage of them looking sad.

the montage of angry tweet and voice clips of people asking when willy was is very much giving the ready for it into from the reputation stadium tour.

i wouldn't wish a migraine on my worst enemy (my worst enemy being mycobacterium tuberculosis) and fuck i forgot how fucking idiotic people were yelling about how willy wasn't playing because of a 'headache' like, no. that IS NOT what a migraine is, fuck right off.

okay i get why they are showing the game highlights along with willy cheering them on, but it FEELS like im watching a fucking react video.

omg hiiiiii PK <3333333333 ive seen you before now, but you look so cute and you are so right they aren't playing hurt they are playing injured, and its fucked up.

<3 stop fucking crying bro <3

WAIT THE SHOT OF WILLY ON THE SUBWAY IN THE TRAILER WAS HIM ON HIS WAY TO GAME SIX????? fucking iconic, also FUCK THE TTC. i hate it more than OC Transpo, which is saying something because i live in Ottawa.

the shot of him walking up the steps in the station and smiling at the bruins fan in front of him... your honour i love him!!

okay i am ALL FOR the dramatic slow mo shots of them set to dramatic music, but have them be doing something cool, not just a lame celly.

...WHO'S CAR IS HE DRIVING HOME???? SIR YOU TOOK THE TRAIN!!!

the episode is called "the best of rivals" but it should be called the william nylander show, WHERE IS PASTA!!!

OMG HIIII PASTAAAAAAA <3333 also i fucking forgot that montgomery called pasta out, fucking hell. the shit you forget in a few months.

fucking hell, now dead son talk. i can't deal with this. i fucking can't. jesus christ. at least now im crying for a real reason, not liek when i watched the new sims trailer (its death themed) two days ago and had to pause it part way through and close the tab because i was crying looking at the sims coffin.

please can the leafs get eliminated now i need to cheer up.

wait omg i forgot it was pasta who got the ot win!!!! ough the nhl scriptwriter knocked that out of the park

its realllllly hard for me to be sad for willy wen he looks like THAT, like sir, if you want me to be sad for you you're gonna need to not be flushed and covered in sweat with your hairy tits out. like. you looks like sex on legs good sir.

awwwwww nice end.

i like seeing sad willy.

and happy pasta

this is FUN, i like this!!!! although, i am fond of a good docuseries, so... i was never NOT going to like this. its fun! its dramaaaaa, and they are swearing which i miss when i watch the other BTS series that teams put out.

[sailoreuterpe]

First Line Ask Game! Rules: List the first lines of the last ten stories you published (or works in progress if you’re feeling brave lol). See if you or others notice any patterns!

(For this game, I included the first paragraph of each fanfiction. I skipped any fandom ship week stories or else more than half of my list would have been just those. I also completely missed “A Commit-y of Marriers” on my first rundown so I’ve included that work as a bonus. ACoM the only fanfiction on my list that’s still ongoing, so it can be its own little category.)

Billy carries the dog off into the field, fully intending to take care of the problem. Fast and kindly. Free Miss Longabaugh of the worry. She has enough on her plate without the others complaining. - The Guy Who Got Flustered

Now what should we do?” Mamoru asks the other brunette as the crystal door silently slides shut behind Usagi. Seiya looks over at him, zer eyes narrowed. The grin on zer face is positively ecstatic and a little manic. Mamoru groans softly. “Seiya, no.” - When Usagi’s Not Home

The next time that Teddy sees his navy buddies, Bob and Linda do hold his hands. In fact, Linda is the one to grab Teddy’s hand first, deliberately and with a smile that glints a little feral. Bob is less showy–of course; it’s Bob–but his grip is no less tight. - I Wanna (Cargo) Hold Your Hand

Jimmy isn’t Linda. Even if he wasn’t such a fucking asshole and an egotistical shithead, he wouldn’t be Linda. Linda is–was…was– - He Isn’t You and that Cuts Me Through

Teddy knows that the Belchers love him. He’s known since before Bob and Linda even started dating him; even when Teddy could have never dreamed that they might love him romantically, he still knew that the whole family cared about him as their friend. They’re all so awesome that they can smash through Teddy’s significant insecurities...most days. - Unforgettable, Too

Louise notices the change first. She’s had Chloe in a headlock for long enough that the redhead should be passed out. Chloe, for her part, is still too angry to care that her perfectly-painted talons aren’t doing shit to Louise. Not any more. And they aren't even breaking on Louise's skin like usual. - Fate and Sole-Mates

The feel of Linda’s calloused hands on Teddy’s bare back isn’t sexy. Sure, he’s had a very minor, very tiny crush on his friend for some time. But right now, there’s nothing titillating about Linda’s hands on his skin as she stabilizes herself against him to draw a bad tattoo design to show to his mother. - Your Hands on My Back (They Give Me a Heart Attack)

Tina assumes that her first date with Zeke will be pretty similar to her first–official–date with Jimmy Junior. And every subsequent first date in Tina’s life. - Let’s Give ‘em Something to Taco ‘Bout

Louise sends Logan a selfie, spread out on the bed, in nothing but her shorts and beanie. There’s a bottle of beer in her hand and various snacks conspicuously placed. Specifically things that Logan hates (like her weird Japanese candy that costs an arm and a leg at the import store). - Girl'z Staycation

Jimmy Junior is awkward and weird. So is Tina. He dances out his emotions. Tina writes out hers. Jimmy Junior can be blunt and kind of mean. Tina gets called out for saying stuff out loud that apparently she’s not even supposed to think. - Quirky Turkey and Peculiar Pig

They woke up as if it were any other day. Linda’s eyes popped open and she grinned, but none of that was special. Most dawns saw Linda Belcher grinning and greeting the sun, her ability to see the best in every moment only occasionally dampened by too much alcohol or life-threatening emergencies. - A Commit-y of Marriers

Alright, here are some general observations. I’m glad to see the spread of fandoms, including one of my oldest, one of my newest, and one that I’m not really in but the material called to me. I only wish that I had a "Pacific Rim" story more recently. I’m pleased to see a range of “Bob’s Burgers” ships (two each for Bob, Tina, and Louise) although I need to write more Gene ship-work. The poor guy doesn’t get enough love in my writing. Many of these pieces are gifts, which makes me smile. I really do love my polyamory, lol. I need to finish the next chapter of ACoM, but I’m having minor writer’s block about a specific scene. Once I’m over that hurdle, the chapter will flow fine. Finally, I enjoy writing in the first-person present tense.

[marmolita]

Tagged for a bunch of tag games by @tulakhord !

(1) shuffle your on repeat playlist and post the first 10 tracks

I don't use Spotify so instead I went for the "most played" list in the app I used and I'm skipping the ones that are only repeat played by my kids and not me. This list is kind of heavily influenced by me listening to the theme songs for a couple fics I wrote on repeat 🥲

New World - L'arc~en~Ciel

First Time - Lifehouse

Paris - The Chainsmokers

When I'm Up - Great Big Sea

TEXAS - Haloo Helsinki! ft JVG

Hide and Seek - Kodaline

Between the Raindrops - Lifehouse ft Natasha Bedingfield

Hanging By A Moment - Lifehouse

Walk On The Moon - Great Big Sea

dears - Gackt

(2) a questionnaire!

Tea, coffee, or soda? Water, tbh, but of these options tea.

Dogs or cats? Dogs 100%

Can you play any instrument? Violin and piano decently well (haven't practiced violin in a long time but I was concertmaster of my college orchestra; piano I quit in 11th grade but I'm decent at it). I can play the recorder a bit, and given a little while to refresh my memory of alto clef I could get by on a viola.

What's your sun sign? Virgo, though I never pay attention to it

First song lyrics that pops into your head? Brand new Lamborghini, fuck a cop car / with the pistol on my hip like I'm a cop [they were playing this at the gym yesterday lol]

Do you have any tattoos? Nope!

Favorite place you've travelled? Gosh this is a hard one! I'm gonna have to go with the UK I think, which feels like a cop out because I have been to many countries and places so picking one that speaks my language and has a similar culture seems silly, but I have been there twice and enjoyed it thoroughly both times.

What's the last movie you've watched? Uhhhhh I don't remember?

What languages do you speak? Fluently, only English. At one point I knew enough Japanese to reasonably get me and my husband around Japan for two weeks, but I have since forgotten most of it. I've been doing Spanish on Duolingo for two years but I would classify myself as a beginner still since I never actually try to talk to anyone.

Do you have any hobbies? Yes? I mean, depends what you consider a hobby, but: writing fanfic, reading, playing piano, jigsaw puzzles, going to parks, going to museums, shopping, and lately I've picked knitting back up and dabbled in embroidery.

You can hang out with one fictional character for an hour, who do you choose? 🤔 Trying to balance here between people I'm obsessed with and people it would actually be fun to hang out with. I think I'm gonna go with Sarah from Sarah and Duck.

Compliment yourself: I'm doing a pretty decent job raising my kids I think!

(3) ao3 first lines tagline

Rules: Share the first lines of ten of your most recent fanfics and tag ten people. If you have written fewer than ten, don’t be shy and share anyway (spoiler alert: rules are made to be broken…)

From newest to oldest...

"And how's my frock coming along?"

"Ah, yes, Tim, come in."

The Magnus Institute's library gets a decent amount of use by academics.

"They want us to do a Valentine's Day special. What do you think we should do? Chocolate?"

It's all a panicked blur: pushing Sasha to run for help, trying to escape to Jon's office only to find it full of worms attacking him, jumping out of the way and landing painfully in a pile of fire extinguishers.

He wakes in the middle of the night breathing hard, covered in sweat, but not from fear.

The door creaked open with its usual unpleasant squeak, drawing Jon's attention irritably away from the files he was paging through.

"You have two hours to get me an answer on what that thing is," Elizabeth says.

They lose the game, which maybe makes it even worse.

"Suomalainen on velho ja ruotsalainen on viikinki."

Tagging though ofc with no pressure to do this: @notthequiettype @ivorydice @footnotesandendings @shoujocowboy @helens-squid and/or anyone else who wants to do it!

[excusethequality]

My 2024 in Film: April

Another month of films.

The sad part is I wouldn't be so far behind on these if I hadn't watched so friggin' many movies in March.

* = rewatches

81.

Bitch

(2017)

— Comedy Drama Directed by: Marianna Palka

A negligent husband/father is forced to start paying attention to his family when his wife suffers a mental break and stars thinking she's a dog.

I think it's worth noting that the actor playing the woman who thinks she's a dog is the director herself. I just think it makes the whole thing better knowing that all the weird scenes with her are ones that she created.

You know, I feel like this one would need a second viewing for me to really get a handle on it. I assumed I knew where it would go from the premise, but it tackles things rather differently than I was expecting. While the woman is almost always the central figure of the story it's actually her husband who we're primarily following and who is growing as a person through the process.

Since I found the woman who is having this break to be the more interesting figure, focusing on her husband was a little offputting. Especially because he is a wildly absent father and husband so watching him suddenly have to grow isn't the journey I came here for.

But there's some scenes at the end that made me start thinking that perhaps I had been looking at the story from the wrong angle and that perhaps the story was doing something subtler than I was giving it credit for.

I am still undecided on this one. But I will say that I have thought about it after I watched it and that can't be said for most movies.

82.*

For Your Consideration

(2006)

—Mockumentary Directed by: Christopher Guest

The set of movie is turned upside down when rumors of Oscar attention hit the set.

File under movies that took me half the movie to remember I had seen it before.

Sometimes Hollywood people want to make movies based on their life experiences as Hollywood people. The only problem being that life in the Hollywood bubble is FAR from a universal experience. So the more you know about the world surrounding Hollywood movies the funnier this will be. Which is rather unlike Guest's other films which have a much broader appeal.

It has its moments, but overall it just felt way too specific and a little ham fisted compared to his other work.

83.

Romy and Michele's High School Reunion

(1997)

— Comedy Adventure Directed by: David Mirkin

Two best friends try to create the image of a successful life in order to impressive the people at their 10 year high school reunion.

I'll be honest, I've avoided watching this movie for years because I just assumed it would be something I wouldn't like. But I finally broke and figured I'd knock another classic off the list and give it a go.

Lo and behold I actually kind of love it?

Since no one makes movies about asexuals, the closest representation I can get is stories about extremely close friends. For instance here Romy and Michele are best friends who've lived together for years. I can't remember exactly, but I think their beds are even in the same room? Are they said to occasionally hook up with dudes? Sure. Do they also seem to be way more into each other than anyone else? Absolutely.

And that my friends, is close enough for me. It's a non-sexual long-lasting, deeply intimate relationship. I'll take what I can get.

It's a silly movie. I could understand if its style of humor wasn't for everyone, but I was having a great time.

84.

The Hating Game

(2021)

— Rom-Com Directed by: Peter Hutchings Based on: The Hating Game by Sally Thorne

After their respective publishing companies merge, two employees with very different styles start a bet to decide who gets to stay and who has to leave.

Okay, so this is just a very stock-standard enemies to lovers story. Usually that's a standard I enjoy, but here the whole thing is rather lukewarm because the two people are both corporate suits and fuck them.

Plus this is pulling on pigtails as foreplay style enemies to lovers. Not like a bitter rivals accidentally forge a bound of shared experience that only they can relate to, kinda enemies to lovers. So no thank you.

More importantly is the fact that early on we see the leading lady at home writing Smurfs fanfiction and then it's never brought up again?! I cannot stress enough how much this threw me. I was waiting the entire movie for that to somehow come back around.

My only guess is they threw that in because it sounded like a nerdy in a literary way kind of thing, without realizing that a person who would write Smurfs fanfiction is a very specific sort of person.

To further prove my point that the writers of this are strangely out of touch is the fact that at one point they refer to epipens as being nerdy...

...what the actual fuck are you talking about? The person has a deadly allergy! Plus the writer of Smurfs fanfiction does not get to mock the person with the epipen for being too nerdy!

Just very much an example of what you get when the popular crowd tries to write a "nerdy" character.

85.

Viktor und Viktoria

[English title: “Victor and Victoria”]

(1933)

— Rom-Com Directed by: Reinhold Schünzel

An aspiring singer impersonates a female impersonator to help a sick colleague, but when an agent discovers her she'll have to try and keep the ruse alive.

I loved Victor/Victoria so much I had to check out the original to see how it compared.

I definitely didn't like it as much as that one. Victor/Victoria used the premise to tackle ideas of queerness & gender and question if society's norms regarding them make any sense in the first place.

This one, however, is just here to have a good time. It's only goal is to give the audience 90minutes of silly good fun with some singing and dancing thrown in to make sure you get your money's worth of entertainment.

Renate Müller is definitely the star of the show as she was actually quite delightful and cute. But the rest of it was a little flat for me.

86.

Orlando, ma biographie politique

[English title: Orlando, My Political Biography]

(2023)

— [I honestly have no idea what genre this would be] Directed by: Paul B. Preciado

An amalgamation of trans stories with that of the story of Virginia Wolfe's Orlando. As the actors playing Orlando change so does the interpretations of the story.

This was the final selection for my house's Roommate Movie Nights and our theme of "Oh! So that's a thing."

It definitely fits the bill as it certainly is an original piece.

I think I was at a large disadvantage here as I have never read or seen any form of adaptation of Viriginia Wolfe's Orlando. So when they intermingle between the real trans stories and Orlando I'm at a bit of a loss as to where the line is.

So yeah. I don't think I'm the right person to go to for an opinion of this one. It's certainly a movie with a style all it's own. I enjoyed the uniqueness and the charm it had in tackling its subject. There was a Virginie Despentes cameo and I was so proud of myself for noticing right away.

[Tangentially I love Virginie Despentes' books. She writes deeply flawed characters in such a fascinating way. She's like the chain-smoking French aunt you never knew you needed in your life.]

87.

We Summoned a Demon

(2017)

— Horror Comedy Short Directed by: Chris McInroy

Two men try to perform a ritual to make themselves cool, but inadvertently summon a demon instead.

It has its moments, but overall not really in line with my sense of humor.

88.

Manhunter

(1986)

— Thriller Directed by: Michael Mann Based on: Red Dragon by. Thomas Harris

A retired criminal profiler is brought back in order to catch a dangerous serial killer.

I feel like I've had to have seen this before at some point, especially considering how big of a fan I am of Bryan Fueller's Hannibal show. I even went and read all of Thomas Harris' books during those years. But if I had seen this before I had forgotten nearly everything. So let's just say it was new to me.

This movie does so many interesting things in its adaptation of the novel and it's especially fun to compare it with the other adaptations.

William Peterson has an intriguing take on Will Graham. But the highlight for me was definitely Brian Cox's Hannibal. Which is just extra fun considering how Anthony Hopkins, Mads Mikkelsen, and Brian Cox have all played the character of Hannibal Lecter, they all have incredibly different versions, but I love them all.

Things like this are part of why I quite enjoy adaptations. Being able to compare how different stories tackle things is fascinating to me.

I really wanted to like this movie more, but there's just a number of parts that really took me out of the story. The music choices were especially bizarre to me. There would be these really tense scenes and then the soundtrack would kick in and just ruin the vibes for me.

I dunno. I'm a sucker for interesting adaptations though and there's just too many interesting choices here for me to discount it. I can't say I loved it, but I also can't say I didn't enjoy the uniqueness of the ride.

89.

Citizenfour

(2014)

— Documentary Directed by: Laura Poitras

The journalists Edward Snowden released his information to document the events of his leaks live as they happened.

Continuing my documentary kick this year, and finding my way here because Kirsten Joshnson, the current reigning champion of my best of this year list, was the cinematographer on this one.

I thought it was just a straight forward documentary about the events of the Snowden leaks, but it is so much more interesting than that!

Laura Poitras was the one Snowden leaked the information to! So she has this record of the whole process. You get to be in the room with her and Snowden and see how they plan the leaks and hear how they react as Snowden witnesses the pieces of his life falling apart as the government tries to track him down.

Just a truly fascinating documentary.

Plus I love reading about cyber security issues, so this is just a win-win all around for me.

90.

Monsters Crash the Pajama Party

(1965)

— Sci-Fi Comedy Short Directed by: David L. Hewitt

Some college girls have a sleep over in an abandoned house as part of a sorority hazing ritual. Unfortunately for them there's a mad scientist living in the basement and he needs more test subjects.

Did I watch this entirely because of the title?

...yes.

Am I proud of that fact?

No.

Not gonna lie: this was a rough watch. They really jumped in with a basic set up to a story and a gimmick, started shooting immediately, realized they didn't know where to go from there, then padded...that...shit...out...to...30...minutes.

The humor is so lazy it hurts. And the whole gimmick is that during one single scene the "monsters" in their bad Spirit Halloween-style costumes would leave the movie and run through the theater before returning to the movie. Even if I had witnessed the gimmick in action it wouldn't have mattered.

The thing's only 30 minutes and by the end it felt like it had gone on for ages.

91.

The Last Unicorn

(1982)

— Animated Fantasy Adventure Directed by: Jules Bass & Arthur Rankin Jr.

A unicorn goes on a quest to find the others of her kind.

This is one of those ones I've heard about forever, but never seen. But leave it to Rankin Bass to make something really unique, but deeply weird.

I honestly don't know what to say. It's a movie that both delivers some amazing emotional beats and will also routinely break their own flow with utterly weird scenes that don't really have a point. (looking at you scene where Alan Arkin is forced to motorboat a busty tree)

If the pacing flowed a bit more evenly I think I would have loved this one, but it was just too cluttered for me to fully invest it.

Also they were dirty for making Jeff Bridges sing that song. Y'all knew damn well he couldn't hit those notes and you made him do it anyway.

92.

Jumanji: The Next Level

(2019)

— Fantasy Comedy Adventure Directed by: Jake Kasdan

The crew from the previous movie wind up back inside the game, because of reasons! But this time some old guys are along for the ride too.

For those who have never seen Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle (2017), let it be known that it is far better than it has any right to be. It actually has some really interesting character work and Jack Black is quite fun in it.

This follow-up to it, however, doesn't make any sense. I am convinced the script was made in a single draft. Because anytime it finds that it wrote itself into a corner it will god-machine its way out. None of the character work makes much sense, but you can see them trying to replicate some of the notes of the other movie and just failing completely.

You cannot convince me that this wasn't made just to cash in on the success of the first one.

On another note, I feel like we as a society need to accept that Dwanye "The Rock" Johnson cannot act.

I think due to the sheer number of movies he's starred in that we've convinced ourselves that he can, because why else would he have so many movies?

I think even he has been fooled. "I've been in SO MANY movies," he thinks to himself. "I must be an incredible actor. I must surely be capable of doing this movie that requires me to portray both a depressed young man in the midst of a breakdown AND Danny DeVito portraying a man who is angry at his aging body and at his life filled with regrets."

Yet here we are.

Two hours and $125 million later.

Thinking to ourselves, "You know what…he is not good at this. Was he ever good at this?"

And the fact of the matter is: No. Not really.

93.

Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny

(2023)

— Action Adventure Directed by: James Mangold

Henry "Indiana" Jones Jr. has retired from adventuring, but is thrown back into the thick of it when a mystery from his past causes factions begin to converge around him.

I could have watched this at the theater I worked at for free, but after Kingdom of the Crystal Skull I really wasn't prepared to sit through 3 hours of this without the ability to take a break.

But the completionist in me finally won out so I picked it up from the library.

All they had to do to make this plot work was do a twist on The Last Crusade, where this time Phoebe Waller-Bridge was the adventurer and Harrison Ford was the old father figure whose passions have come back to haunt him, and it would have been a really fun ride. Instead we're stuck following this old Dr. busted "get off my lawn" Jones around and she's just kind of there.

There's just so much going on here and none of it means anything.

In other news, Karen Allen is aging gracefully af. Holy smokes.

In fact, I take back my earlier plot outline. I want Phoebe Waller-Bridge and Karen Allen as my dream duo for things that could have been made instead of this. In fact I just want them to work together on anything, it doesn't even have to be this.

94.

Anatomy of a Murder

(1959)

— Courtroom Drama Directed by: Otto Preminger

A former D.A. and current small town lawyer agrees to take a case defending a man who has been accused of murder after he killed a man he claims raped his wife.

Fucking Jimmy Stewart.

I often will watch something purely based on someone's recommendation or having read something about it that intrigued me, so I frequently don't know the cast of an older movie before I see it. And this bastard is always sneaking his way into my watchlist, in spite of the fact that he drives me up the wall.

Y'all, I don't even know.

It's shot really well, there's some interesting scenes and some great performances (not you, Stewart), and I know it has a pretty great reputation. But Jimmy Stewart playing a wealthy lawyer who doesn't pay his employees and takes a case to defend an abusive murderer for fun and sport? I just have a real hard time getting into that.

95.

Lake Placid 2

(2007)

— Made-for-TV Horror Directed by: David Flores

The events of the first movie have become mere rumors, but it turns out those giant crocs aren't content to let themselves become merely the stuff of legends.

I have a soft spot for the original Lake Placid. Don't get me wrong, it's a ridiculous movie, but it's the fun kind of dumb. Plus Betty White is in it and she is just a treat.

I assumed going into this that it wouldn't live up to the original, but at least it might bring some cheesy good fun. I was not prepared for just how low the budget of this movie was.

I actually had to pull out my phone and make sure this was actually a legitimate sequel early into the movie, because it is just so much cheaper than the original. It appears that the Sci-Fi channel somehow ended up with the rights to the property and decided to make some low budget made-for-tv movies with it.

Although 30 year olds playing teenagers never fails to make me laugh, it is not a good movie. The best thing about it is that they got Cloris Leachman to do their version of the Berrty White role (an amazing choice), but the writing is so bad that her talent is really wasted here.

For sure filing under bad films to laugh at with friends, but not to watch alone.

96.

The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert

(1994)

— Queer Road Trip Adventure Directed by: Stephan Elliott

3 drag performers go on a road trip across Australia in order to get to a big gig.

My go-to drag road trip movie has always been To Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything! Julie Newmar, but I figured I had gone long enough without having seen this.

I really like Hugo Weaving and Terence Stamp. Guy Pearce remains on my list of actors I just can't get into though.

I still need to get around to doing some research on this one. I'm curious what queer people think of it today and also what their consensus (if any) was back in the 90s.

Although I truly have no idea what the hell they were thinking with the Cynthia character, because that bit thoroughly confused me. It's hard to see that and not wonder, "how exactly did they think this wouldn't be considered racist?"

It's hard not to compare and contrast this with To Wong Foo, even though they are tonally very different. To Wong Foo is much lighter and more of a story about the importance of being yourself, surrounding yourself with people that support you, and not letting adversity tear you down.

Priscilla has a much darker and more realistic undercurrent and seems to be more of a story of knowing who you are, but struggling to figure out exactly how you're supposed to fit into a world that wasn't built with you in mind.

Like always, it would be great if a movie with a trans character had actually gotten a trans actor for the role. But at least Priscilla was written and directed by a gay man, so for a mid-90s movie it's still far queerer than most.

97.

Minding the Gap

(2018)

— Documentary Directed by: Bing Liu

Filmmaker Bing Liu dives into skateboard culture, coming of age, and a search for identity in this documentary. He combines the skating footage from his younger years with modern interviews with his old skating group to try and learn the role skating had in their lives and what it means now that they've gotten further into adulthood.

This movie is so good!

I went into this thinking this was a different skating boarding documentary, so I was a little confused at the start, but what a happy accident!

Part of what makes it so compelling is how Bing Liu straddles the line between documentarian and participant. The story he's able to capture is one only possible from him and because of his relationship with the group

Definitely one of my favorite things I've seen this year.

98.*

Minding the Gap

(2018)

see #97

Did I watch this and then immediately watch it again with the commentary?

Yes.

Yes I did.

99.

Vox Lux

(2018)

— Drama Directed by: Brady Corbet

A former survivor of a school shooting and current pop star struggles in a life where her public image has dominated how she is seen by both the world and herself.

I kind of hate this movie. I'm not sure it deserves to be hated though. A LOT of my hatred comes from the fact that Natalie Portman is the star and she is doing a BIZARRE accent the entire movie. Which is made all the weirder because at the start of the movie you see her character as a kid and she very much does not have the accent.

So here's this character that somehow grew up to have what I can only describe as the New York equivalent of the Dick Van Dyke-style British accent that Americans do. At not point does it ever approach accuracy, but you can kind of see where they were trying to go with it?

If you see me talk about enough movies you'll start to notice that I have a very hard time overlooking certain details in movies. It's why I traditionally don't like Hitchcock movies, because he is the master of throwing in random details of the type that I can't not fixate on.

And having the main character doing an absurd accent for the whole movie is so utterly distracting to me. Was the movie aside from that fact any good? I don't even know. Anytime I thought I was starting to understand the themes of the movie is would seemingly abandon that thread and start doing something else.

I just don't know. Whatever this movie is, it's definitely not for me.

100.

Paddington 2

(2017)

— Family Comedy Adventure Directed by: Paul King

A simple attempt to find a birthday gift for his mother goes horribly astray when it leads to a chain of events that get Paddington thrown in prison.

The Paddington movies have the sort of heart that you just so rarely see from family movies these days. Lots of others in the genre feel like some sort of innocuous thing that was grown in a lab and designed by committee to as unoffensive as possible.

But the Paddington movies have a charm and a soul all their own. And the direction of both films is leagues beyond what you'd typically expect from the cgi-character has an adventure family genre.

I'll admit that I like the first movie better as I found the whole thing to be overall tighter. But this is still a lot of fun. I wouldn't say this one is up there with the family movies that everyone needs to see, but it's still a charming little film that's awfully hard not to enjoy.

101.

Bad Black

(2016)

— Action Comedy Directed by: Nabwana I.G.G.

An American doctor in Uganda must get martial arts training from a child in pink crocs known as Swaz if he ever hopes to get an heirloom back from the notorious gangster Bad Black.

This is a kind of movie that you just need to see to understand.

Imagine a movie made by a group of money without a lot of money or equipment or training, but a hell of a lot of passion and fun. They're out here with the kind of originality that you only get from those who were never taught what the rules were, because—for better or for worse—they're breaking all of them.

It's definitely not going to be for everyone. But if you love action comedies and weirdly memorable b-movies, then it's certainly something you might want to try out.

102.

Good Time

(2017)

— Crime Drama Directed by: Benny Safdie & Josh Safdie

A criminal's desperate attempts to get his brother out of jail lead him to going to increasingly dangerous lengths as his desperation increases.

Jeez, there's a lot going on in this one. I enjoyed it, but I think I'd need to really sit down and dedicate some real time and thought to breaking it down properly.

The fact that it mostly takes place over a single night gives it this really interesting sort of tension. Robert Pattinson is fantastic. And this character we're following is really intriguing.

He's a really well written antihero. He is far from a good person and over the course of the movie he does a number of terrible deeds. He's greedy and uses people and is selfish. But like any good character you can't help but to find his struggle compelling because he really is willing to risk it all to help his brother.

It's certainly something I'll have to give another watch down the line.

103.

The Happytime Murders

(2018)

— Comedy Whodunnit Directed by: Brian Henson

In a world where humans and puppets live together, a puppet P.I. and a Human homicide detective must team up to solve a string of brutal puppet murders.

This was kind of exactly like what I thought it would be like, but I'll admit that it has its moments.

I feel like there's two ways to play puppets in the real world: A) a Muppets style (they're just there and no one calls attention to it, or B) a sci-fi style (where you take it seriously and try to explain how exactly that works).

This one tries to explain how this all works and create a believable human/puppet world, but they aren't great explanations and there's no consistency. Like in one scene a puppet will be able to beat up a human, but in another they'll be unable to do anything because they're just full of cotton.

If you're going muppets style I can easily suspend my disbelief, but if you specifically tell me this world has rules and then are constantly breaking those rules then that fucks really takes me out of things.

I don't really have much to say about this. There are certainly some fun parts, but it's a very one-note kind of movie. And the one note is just: "isn't it funny when puppets do or say crude things!"

104.

龙马精神

[English title: “Ride On”]

(2023)

— Action Comedy Drama Directed by: Larry Yang

An aging stuntman is given another chance at stardom when his beloved horse is shown to also have a knack for stuntwork.

When I saw the trailer I was just thinking: "Jackie Chan and a horse? That's a recipe for silly good fun."

I was not expecting a really thoughtful and poignant story to be hiding in there!

I know it sounds weird to say, but I've actually thought about this one a lot since I watched it. Hiding in the silliness is this thoughtful look on a life and career in stunt work. But it also works as just an older person looking back and wondering if some of the decisions they made in the past were worth it. Then looking to the new generations and seriously considering whether or not the old ways are actually better or if the new trends have merit.

Not to mention that Jackie is out here doing some really fantastic acting.

It's definitely not a perfect film though. It's probably the only time I've watched a Jackie Chan movie and wished there weren't as many fights. This time I'm here for the drama! The character work, the relationships between Jackie's character trying to make up for lost time and create a better relationship with his daughter, there's so much here. Most of the fights just seem shoehorned in because you've gotta have fights in a Jackie Chan movie, right?

I dunno. In spite of its flaws it has given me more food for thought than a lot of "better" movies I've seen this year and I quite like it. I wouldn't recommend it if you want pure Martial Arts action, but if you're in the mood for something silly, something sweet, something quirky, and something lighter but with some hidden depths? It's got you covered.

105.

무림여대생

[English title: “My Mighty Princess”]

(2008)

— Wuxia Rom-Com Directed by: Jae-young Kwak

A high school girl tries to navigate the troubles of high school and of her father's attempts to get her to dedicate herself to her training in martial arts.

I only just realized that a lot of people might not know what Wuxia is. So for context Wuxia is a genre of Chinese fiction that deals in historical martial arts fantasy. The closest approximation in Western literature I can think of would probably be something like the tales of Arthur and the knights of the round table? Where there are monsters and magic, but they're the magic and monsters of olden days, not full-blown high fantasy. And we follow heroes who have a strict code and fight for what's right.

Umm...what are some examples people might be familiar with in America...

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon is based on a classic Wuxia novel. And Kung-Fu Panda was inspired by the genre (although they definitely cross pollinated it with some Western storytelling styles).

Anyways, it's a genre style that definitely had an impact across Asian fiction.

My Mighty Princess kind of aims to combine a high school rom-com with a more classic wuxia story and it's a tricky one for me diagnose.

I think there's a lot to love in this. The humor is quite fun and the setup is solid. It's just that there's a pretty heavy tonal jump in the middle. It starts out full rom-com then switches gear in the middle to start the wuxia angle and it's way too big of a shift for me. I definitely would have preferred if the genres were a bit more evenly melded from the start.

Then there's this whole weird b-storyline with this high school student who keeps trying to win the heart of this cop lady and that doesn't really go anywhere.

I'm probably a little overly harsh on it, because I quite like parts of it, but I didn't love it overall. And it's always annoying when that happens, because you kind of want to rewatch it, but then again you kind of don't.

106.

The American Buffalo

(2023)

— Documentary Directed by: Ken Burns

A look at the colonizers history with the American buffalo and how it relates to their history with the indigenous peoples.

Technically I think this might be a miniseries not a movie, but it's short enough to watch during a single sitting so I'm gonna count it.

It's pretty standard for a PBS-style documentary. The subject matter is interesting, but I think it perhaps would have been better handled by a native director instead of the whitest man alive. And I also was pulled out of it whenever they got famous people to read the bits of diaries and whatnot.

You'd just be listening and then suddenly be wondering, "wait, why is Paul Giamatti talking right now?"

107.

The Taming of the Shrew

(1967)

—Shakespeare adaptation Directed by: Franco Zeffirelli Based on: The Taming of the Shrew by William Shakespeare

A group of men seek to coerce a strong willed woman into a bad marriage in their attempts to wed her younger and more demur sister.

I'm not gonna lie, I've seen a number of loose Taming of the Shrew adaptations, but I've never actually seen a more-or-less direct adaptation or the play itself.

It turns out that the actual story is super fucked up? The whole "taming" idea was always a little iffy depending on how it was deployed, but in the story they are just straight up abusing the shit out of her? Full on mentally and physically abusing her into submission?

I don't really have any insight for this. When I wasn't a little bit bored I was just sitting there being deeply uncomfortable.

——————

——————

April Stats

——————

Movies watched this month: 27

Rewatch percentage: 7.4% (2/27)

Favorite new movie of the month: Minding the Gap

Least favorite: The Taming of the Shrew

——————

——————

Previous Months’ Posts:

JAN | FEB | MAR.p1 | MAR.p2

[for-the-freaks-and-geeks-ptii]

all odd numbers, go

1. selfie

That’ll be its own post

3. do you miss anyone?

Old friends. On occasion.

5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?

My sisters and my closest friends. My best friends I’ve had since I was like 5

7. what was your life like last year?

The same but colder. It was fucking freezing in Cali last year.

9. who did you last see in person?

My sisters. I picked em up from school today.

11. are you listening to music right now?

Childish Gambino’s new album

13. how do you feel right now?

Kinda hungry. Kinda horny.

15. personality description

I’m calm, funny, warm, and caring. I’d put someone else’s needs before my own a thousand times.

17. opinion on insecurities.

Everyone is of course entitled to have them. I hope that everyone with an insecurity works on it. Bit by bit. You should never feel ashamed to be the way the are or look the way you look.

19. have you ever been to New York?

No. I’m a west coast man.

21. age and birthday?

April 27. Just passed recently actually

23. fear(s)

Heights. Only thing in my life I’m uneasy around. Came from a childhood trauma but I’m better about it these days

25. role model

My grandfather. Best man I knew. I love each day trying to be as good as he was. Hopefully better.

27. things i hate

Bullies. Arrogance. Entitlement. Capitalism. Pickles. You’ll call me an old man for this but TikTok. I think social media is inherently harmful for teenagers but TikTok trends actually have hurt and killed people. Kids should be safe. Always.

29. favourite film(s)

I’m a big movie guy so that’s a long list. Just assume that if you have a favorite movie I’ve also seen it and love it. Godzilla minus one? Incredible. Tarantino movies? Love em but I know there’s problems with a few of em. Horror movies? The genre of horror is so good and survivor girls are my favorite. The big short? Baby Driver? Barbie? Spider-Verse? Too many to think of

31. 3 random facts

About me or in general? Uuuh…I know Japanese, Spanish and English. I’ve met Emma Stone (briefly) cause they filmed part of the amazing spider-man 2 at my high school over the summer and I was there one day to turn in something or other. I’m a virgin.

33. something you want to learn

Archery. Looks fun

35. favourite subject

In school? English. I’ve never had anything lower than an A in English. My ability to retain written information is top notch.

37. favourite actor/actress

Keanu Reeves. He’s really down to earth and kind despite his overwhelming popularity. I like humility.

39. favourite sport(s)

I’m not a sports guy.

41. relationship status

Single cause intimacy scares me

43. favourite song ever

That’s impossible to answer. Music fits your mood and moods change constantly

45. how you found out about your idol

My what?

47. turn ons

Brutal honesty. Short hair. Intelligence. Mettle. Wit.

49. where i want to be right now

A nice little beach area just south of Santa Barbara. Either with family or friends or a significant other if I ever got one of those

51. starsign

Taurus?

53. 5 things that make me happy

Friends, food, travel, family and video games

55. tumblr friends

I’ve made several. Many were lost in the purge. Myself included. They’re cute dorky horny types.

57. favourite animal(s)

Dogs. They’ve all liked me and I them. Never met an animal that was hostile towards me. I make peace with most creatures very quickly

59. why i joined tumblr

I was in high school and found out you could post porn on it and post about nerdy stuff. Plus no one I knew irl followed me so I ran rampant. Met lots of other nerdy horny people. Freaks and geeks

Thanks for asking 💜

[lauperak]

I don't have Twitter anymore, and I feel like saying something. 2023 has been one of the worst years in a long time for me. So let's sum it up.

2nd of January, my beloved dog of 14 years was put to sleep. My father made sure to arrange it as soon I was back in Scotland, so I had no way of preparing myself or to say goodbye. His words on the phone to me were literally "Hey you, we've put Kai down. Thought you should know." I'm still devastated about this loss for so many reasons.

On top of losing my dog, one of my closest family members, I had to push through the grief and work on my dissertation. A topic that I didn't choose, a topic I didn't like, and a time era that I was not at all interested in. It barely got me a pass.

In March, my cousin Cecilie, who I grew up with, was violently killed in a car accident. Again, I was abroad, and there was no way for me to grieve with my family. Once again, I had to push through sorrow in order to finish my (stupid) dissertation.

My dissertation was submitted on time, although it didn't feel finished. But there was no more to say about the topic. I hated it so fucking much and its put me off studying history for a while. Ugh.

My exams came and passed, and those I was luckily happy with. One I passed with an A ♡

Then came the best and the worst week of my life (Insert Homer "so far" meme here.) June 27th was my graduation day. My closest family made it over to Scotland from Norway, and I was so excited and happy. Graduation went smoothly, and we celebrated with dinner. 3 days later turned out to be the darkest day of the year.

30th of June, and my family had gone back to Norway. I was socially exhausted, and so was my boyfriend Finnick, who I live with. He was gaming that day, and I was sleeping. I woke up to have a pee and a snack when there was a frantic banging on the door. Finnick bounced up to open it, and not a second later, I heard him screaming. People don't exaggerate when they say fear made their blood freeze. His scream chilled me to the bone. Over his wailing, I heard our neighbour say, "I'm so very sorry to bring the bearer of such horrific news." I already knew then what had happened. I ran downstairs, sprung over my boyfriend, who'd collapsed in the doorway, and I ran to her. My precious Nox. My baby girl. My reason for not killing myself since 2020 (or at least for not succeeding at suicide attempts.) She lay there, dead in the rain. She was so cold, her fur was soaked from the rain. My survival instinct of not panicking in an extreme situation kept me cold and calm. Finnick's sudden outburst had gathered a crowd, and I told people to please move along. That for us, this is a family crisis. They knew how much she meant for us. I picked Nox up. Her tiny body felt empty. Her soul wasn't there anymore. As soon as I got into the kitchen, I broke down screaming and wailing. That's when my boyfriend made it up from the floor. His Scottish decency made him thank the neighbours first before he closed the door and joined me. I was in total shock.

Finnick was the only one who knew what to do next. He called our veterinarian and explained the situation. We both already knew that she was gone. Rigor mortis was starting to set in. I cried and I screamed non stop while cradling her in my arms. Finnick brought the carrier bag to us and he begged me to let her go. He needed to take her away to the vet. I could never have been ready for this moment, and I'm still so incredibly grateful for how strong and calm he remained. I was in no condition to come with him and Nox to the veterinarian. If I hadn't peed before this, I would've peed my pants on the kitchen floor. I was fully aside myself. There were no rational responses from me at all. So he had to negotiate her dead body from me.

I left for Norway just a couple of days later. It wasn't safe for me in Scotland anymore, all due to my mental health. I couldn't be alone. But on my way home from Scotland, I had to pick up an emergency passport in London because my passport had expired in March that same year.

At Stansted Airport was where this year was to send another emergency my way. I collapsed right after checking in. This time due to my spine. I couldn't move. The only thing I was able to do was to wriggle my backpack off. Airport crew and medics came running to my aid. I was so embarrassed. The medics team wanted to take me to a hospital in London because this was clearly a serious injury. I refused. I told the airport crew to put me in a wheelchair and to get me on that plane. I was going home.

That flight was hell. I honestly don't remember much because I was in so much pain that I must've blacked out at some point. I did get co-codeine from the airport, so the first part wasn't so bad. The painkillers at least calmed my mind. I stayed in a wheelchair the whole way to Kristiansand. I'm so grateful to every airport crew who was so understanding and kind for that whole trip home.

I got an emergency appointment with my GP the day after. She sent me straight to the hospital when she saw what shape I was in. I stayed two days in hospital, where the doctors stuffed me with painkillers and kept wondering whether they should take an X-ray or an MRI of my spine or not. This was because I could still walk, with great difficulty, and on crutches, I may add, yet I still had mobility in my lower body. They sent me home for bedrest with morphine pills.

It took a whole month for me to recover. By that time, my boyfriend had arranged to join me. However, he had to wait because we had both arranged for Nox's cremation and for her urn to come home to us. My amazing, strong, kind, determined Finnick. He brought her body to the veterinarian, and he returned with her urn. I couldn't have managed to do any of that. He managed because he was doing it for us, his family.

By the time Finnick joined me in Norway, it was mid-August. We decided to move to Norway together. And it needed to happen ASAP. We decided to move to the North of Norway, in a municipality called Lyngen. Everything was arranged within a few weeks after returning to Scotland. We got a house to rent, work was waiting, we booked a moving van, cancelled the tenancy, and packed our lives into boxes.

Then crisis struck again, and this time, it was worse than ever before. My back had been sore ever since that day in London, but I had tried to be careful.

19th of September, my spine collapsed. I couldn't move at all this time. All I could do was scream in absolute agony. My boyfriend called the ambulance. They arrived after 20 minutes, which is record time for a UK ambulance. However, they ended up spending nearly 3 hours attempting to get me up from the floor. They had to give me the strongest painkillers, meant for people with open bone fractures, in order to lift me into a rolling chair, which took me to the hospital. I screamed as the ambulance drove over every pebble. It is the worst pain I have ever experienced. I've fractured my spine before, I've also had to pass a kidney stone, but this was way way worse. At the E&A, a doctor performed some tests, and a nurse did an ultrasound of my uterus. Again, as I was given painkillers, my mobility in my legs returned.

I am, of course, eternally thankful that I wasn't paralysed, but it also meant that the doctors didn't take me seriously anymore. Just as they hadn't at the hospital in Kristiansand earlier that year. However, as the doctor decided to check me out of the hospital, I demanded to see another doctor. I wanted an orthopaedic expert to have a look at me. It took pleading, and it took embarrassing measures, but I was finally heard by the head nurse of the department.

An orthopaedic doctor came to see me 5 minutes later, and it took him less than a minute to transfer me to the orthopaedic department and to booke me an emergency MRI. This was nearly 13 hours after being admitted to hospital.

The MRI showed that my old spinal injury from 2012 was causing a problem again. I have erosion in the damaged vertebraes, and the only reason that I'm not paralysed is because I've still got spinal fluid passing through the eroding vertebraes. It's three vertebraes that are damaged in my lower spine. The orthopaedic doctor wanted to booke me in for surgery, but I was determined to move home on the 27th.

The week coming up to the 27th of September was so humiliating. I was completely immobilised, and I couldn't get up on my feet. I wore adult diapers, and my poor boyfriend had to tidy my body. His devotion is based on true love. He's not complained once. He took charge of the move, packed the rest of our stuff, and he brought me home.

Our dream of moving to Lyngen was crushed. There was no way we could move to the middle of the polar circle, to a house sat in between the Norwegian alps, all by ourselves. It was devastating having to cancel the trip to Lyngen, and to tell the landowner that we wouldn't make it because I've injured my back and I'll be in a wheelchair on welfare for a while.

Which leaves me to today. It's the 7th of October, it's 7:30 in the morning and I've been writing this blog post since 5.

Now I'm speculating whether to post this or not. I suppose if you're reading this, it must mean I've posted it. I am so devastated and disappointed. After spending 4 years in Scotland, fighting for my life against my own mental illness, after managing to pull through the worst time of my life, all in order to make a better future for myself, I'm back at square one.

I'm disabled for now. I'm in a wheelchair and I need assistance for the smallest task. Like wiping my butt, brushing my teeth, and general daily care. I can move my legs. I am making some tiny progress. I can walk a few steps with the aid of crutches. I've been booked for another MRI here in Norway and my GP is taking this much more seriously now. There will most likely be a surgery sometime in the future. I'm hoping soon.

Finnick is staying on a tourist visa, but he's in the progress of acquiring a working visa. We've secured a small yet super cosy flat, not far from our friends and family. It's on the ground floor, so I won't need to worry about stairs. My father has helped us get a car, and for the time being, we're staying with my mother.

I am so eternally thankful for my family and for the love of my life, Finnick, who is staying strong. I will marry this man one day.

[wait----------what]

- ok but that cut scene where the gremlin got freed from the safe was waaaaay funnier than it had any right to be

- awwww oswald made a house for mickey in ostown? that's so swee- oh wait nvr mind the implementation of him hopin mickey would be forgotten have made this waaaay less wholesome

- i- I think I just gave the ok for a murder?? like I thought I was just skippin through dialogue n hit a accidentally n one of the gremlins just disappears into the house n only comes out after a lotta bashin sounds + a scream (?)

plus the phone was gone when I went back in n all that was left was a gear soooooo. . .oops

- gods damn that view angle i can't see shit cause it keeps bashin against the wall behind like I wanna see whats trynna kill me thank you very much

-awwwww what cute lil babie- NOT CUTE I REPEAT NOT CUTE WHY DO THEY MERGE TOGETHER WHY THE FUCK IS IT SO BIG???

- alright so thats what happens when they see me at a distance, wonder what happens if the lil bunnies crowd around m- did those fuckers just throw me over board??? Oswald get your mini army under control man

- ok but goin thru the oswald cartoons as challenges was sooo fuckin cool, like I knew about trolly troubles right off the bat cause its one of the more referenced ones but I wasn't expectin the medieval one to be there n I had no clue about the war one until I was dumped into it. like the level of care n detail that went into that was bloody insane like I unlocked the knight cartoon not too long after n it was so cool to see how different bits n pieces of it that went into that platformer, a bunch of it was stuff I'd completely forgotten about too

-OSWALD :D

- oz you dramatic lil bitch I saw you paceing before I showed up I know you were waitin for juuuust the right moment to spin around

- oop looks like mickey's finally figured out he's the fuckin problem

- oof goofy's seen better days, he's really lost it since the thinner disaster

- wait was thay doing collar side quest a reference to the dog from the carousel of progress??

- oh my fuck the submarine bein how you get to tomorrow land (city whatever the fuck) is so bloody cool as an enby that loves their steampunk shit seein that thing actually do somethin was great

- hey that is the carousel of progress!! there's even that bloody song playin in the background! shame that those characters weren't there im pretty sure they could be considered forgotten at this stage cause the only reason I knew about it was cause we were hidin from fire works

I'll be honest im playing this game as an animation nerd first n a gamer second (if the fact thay the only other games I've talked about on here weren't to do with animation of some kind) but this game is actually pretty good so far, like honestly for the things that got chucked onto the wii from Disney about that time its been pretty good (plus really diggin how oswald has a genuine reason to resent mickey instead of bein jealous for the sake of it, havin a constant reminder of you brothers success that has literally become a mountain cant have made those feelings any easier)

I just started playin epic mickey for the first time (I thought I'd played it before but idk if I ever managed to get that far in wo my brother wantin to play ( he basically just wanted to watch me play it a la lets play style) that stupid princess game

Soooo lets get this shit on the road like I did for batdr

- mickey you dick

- its nice for a tutorial where you can actually die in I've not got one of those in a while n its nice to know that 'don't step in the green stuff' actual means go ahead n jump in it if you like but it ain't gonna be good for you

- OSWALD :D

- oooooh the art style for those cut scenes are fuckin amazin! its kinda a lil grainy like its all been draw in by pencil with a couple stray strokes here n there its so cool!

- so I'm basically doin the same shit the guy from who framed roger rabbit did? ( this one came from my dad since he was in the room doin work cause we'd meant to play em2 cause its a 2 player but it wouldn't start)

- gettin some major undertale vibes from the paint to befriend, thinner to kill thing so far

- holy fuck that projector-travel-platformer is so cool, especially with the edges of the film reel at the side of the screen, would've been cooler if it had the same 2d effect the cut scenes had goin on to really tie the old cartoon vibe together cause mockey kinda stands out in the wii-3d-graphic way

- welp. . .geuss helpin those trapped guys really was useful after all

- all the references to Alice's adventures in wonderland/alice through the looking glass have been real neat so far, like the but at the first cut scene (which given that its happening in the the 'real world makes scence that its the typical style that the rest of the game is in) n the fact that you're followin a rabbit deeper n deeper into this world is super cool!

Idk that's kinda it for now . . . Bye:D