#like i have enough autism symptoms i can probably fill out a checklist but they don't really affect my life the way adhd does

[kiseiakhun]

Sometimes I wonder how much crossover there actually is between ADHD and autism, vs... if you have ADHD there's a higher chance you have SOME degree of autism, and vice versa. How much of it is inherent to the diagnosis vs subclinical comorbidity

[livebloggingmydescentintomadness]

i think i may be autistic, but i am scared to mention it to my therapist. i think maybe i'm actually not and probably just want to have something special about me. i read the symptoms and did some "not a diagnostic tool" tests, and it seems that maybe i am autistic, but on the other hand i'm 26 and how could no one notice anything for all those years. but also some things don't fit, like i have to have music to fill silences, because the quiet hurts my head, and i think this is the opposite of what i read regarding over stimulation? i am just very very confused

i actually didn't figure out i was autistic until i was nearly 30! i pretty much spent three decades feeling like a freak because i knew i didn't fit in, i knew i was 'weird', and i was sure that something was wrong with me, but i just didn't present with the 'typical' autism traits so nobody ever noticed until one day i saw a tumblr post with a list of atypical traits and i said "wait a minute."

so let me punch out a few important things here real quick:

autism is not one size fits all. we are usually more sensitive or less sensitive to certain things that allistics, which means that we can have extremely opposite traits.

therefore, some autistics are hypersensitive to bright lights and need darkness, while others are hyposensitive and stim by looking at bright colored lights. some have dull bodily triggers, such as not feeling the urge to the bathroom until it's too late/almost too late, while others have very sensitive bodily triggers and need to go to the bathroom frequently. some might get drunk off one serving of alcohol, some might have a very high tolerance.

autism is also not a checklist where you have to have every trait, nor is it a 'more' to 'less' kind of spectrum. the autism spectrum looks like this.

if you're female/assigned female at birth, you are less likely to get a diagnosis. not less likely to be autistic, but less likely to be diagnosed, because there's a sexism problem in the medical establishment.

26 years ago there was much less understanding about autism, so it's not actually very strange for a kid who was just 'a little weird' to not get noticed and diagnosed.

the medical establishment still has outdated criteria for diagnosis, because they tend to go by stereotypes that don't encompass the actual autistic experience. there are some professionals who won't diagnose you if you have friends, if you're able to live on your own or hold down a job, if you can 'pass' as allistic.

professional diagnosis is ultimately not the definitive word on whether or not you're autistic. most of us support self-diagnosis because there are many barriers to diagnosis and may not be many rewards. i never bothered to get professionally diagnosed because i knew it would be difficult, i wouldn't get much out of it, and i've spoken to enough autistics about my traits that i feel confident in my identity and don't need anyone else to tell me who i am.

you don't need an allistic doctor's signature on a piece of paper to be autistic. around 1 in 60 people are autistic, at least, so it's not some rare condition you're unlikely to have.

if you look at a list of autistic traits and not all of them but quite a few give you repeated "ohhhh" moments, that pretty much works for me. i am strictly against gatekeeping the autistic identity.

okay, i hope that cleared some stuff up. next, here's my autism traits tag and my autism resources tag. do some reading and think things over, give yourself some benefit of the doubt, don't rush to judge yourself as "trying to be special", and if you have that "oh my god, that's why i do that" moment? welcome to the club, hon.

eta @lovelesscupcake‘s valuable replies:

Important note: your therapist is not your doctor! If you think you have something, the therapist is your BEST option to explore that with. They are not trained to diagnose you, that has to be done by a doctor, but they can help you based on their experience! And if your therapist listens to your story, they will strongly suggest you to go to a doctor for a diagnosis and BOOM, when you do to the doctor you can say : (1/2)

'My therapist advised me to see you since we both think I might be autostic'. Unfortunately, many doctors are against self diagnosis because they don't understand how inaccessible proper help is to some people. So don't be afraid to go to the therapist. They're your safest bet to get an actual diagnosis!

While I agree that you don't need an official diagnosis to be autistic, it DOES help a lot and opens many doors for potential help.