#like i get it we pretty much all used to like it but at this point…
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classyrbf · 1 day ago
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THAT D!CK IS A 10/10! — JJK MEN
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SYNOPSIS...an analysis on the jjk men’s dicks just because hehe :)
INFO...jjk men x gn!reader, we’re talking about cock and balls a lot (no seriously), cum analysis, where they like to cum, heavy detail (be warned), im trying to make this a little realistic so no, gojo will not have a 12 inch dick (sorry not sorry), not proofread
OTHER...likes and reblogs are appreciated
here’s a little something while I’m being a busy bee and dealing with life (help me)
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GOJO
to start off, gojo isn’t too big or isn’t small either, if anything he’s just perfect (cause he is perfect duh). He’s around 3 inches soft and 6.6 inches hard. Listen, as much as I want to make this man have the hugest dick ever, he does not and it’d cause an extreme amount of pain every time he is pounding you. He’s not too girthy either, just the average 4.3. His also slightly curves upward which is perfect for hitting your sweet spot. But he’s super sensitive on the tip! So if you tease him too much there he might just cum prematurely. His balls are definitely a decent size too, they may be on the bigger side a little but he loves to have his balls played with so have fun! When gojo cums, he cums a lot! It literally will go all over the place if he can’t control it correctly. It’s spurts out in waves and it sometimes it’s like torture cause it makes his orgasms last longer but god does it feel so good. His cum is sort of thin and runny instead of thick and goopy with a slight salty taste.
NANAMI
i personally feel like nanami is fucking packing girth wise! He is slightly smaller than gojo around like 5.75-6 inches but he is fucking girthy! It’s like a damn weapon and it’s heavy (I’ll help you carry it around nanami, don’t you worry). His girth is around 5.5-6 inches and it’s veiny! Lord help us all because he knows how to use that thing, hitting all the right angles. From being so girthy his cock slightly hangs…So what comes with a fat cock? Big breeder balls! Duh! His balls are so fat and big it’s like an instinct to suck and lick on them. He leaks a lot of precum when he’s hard so it just drips from his cock until he cums so hard. Speaking of cum, unlike gojo he has more of a thicker consistency, and instead of spurting out all over, it just flows from his cock and it’s looks so pretty like a fountain. It drips all down his cock and balls and onto his hand if he’s jerking himself off. When he’s fucking you, he definitely cums inside and just fucks his cum into you over and over until he makes a big mess.
TOJI
my man, my man, my man! Toji is definitely bigger than nanami and gojo but only by like 1-2 inches. So he’s around 7 inches which is still scary bc why are just walking around with that? He’s definitely girthy too but not like nanami, he’s more girthy around the tip of his cock and it gets slightly smaller towards the base but it’s not a huge difference. He’s tip gets really pink and red when he’s hard that it almost looks painful (don’t worry baby I’m on my way to help) but I promise he’s fine. Dare I say that doesn’t trim that often???? I feel like he has a slightly bush, nothing too crazy but it’s kind of grown out. He doesn’t care (me neither) as long as he gets laid he’s fine. His balls are mix of nanami and gojos but they hang! So when he’s fucking you they definitely slap against your skin. When toji cums it’s pretty normal, it’s sometimes shoots out a little bit and then slows down after, but it’s definitely a good amount of cum that does come out quickly. He loves to see your face or your chest covered in it because he’s a pervy little bastard for sure.
GETO
pretty boy geto hehe…let’s just say that thing curves to the left okay? He’s around 6.5-7 inches and girthy so let’s pray for everyone’s holes cause I don’t think we are making it out alive. He’s somewhere between nanami’s and Toji’s girth so…do what you will with that info. His dick is so pretty though, a pretty dick for a pretty face, the curtains match the drapes yk? He has two prominent veins that run on the underside of his dick where he’s really sensitive. If you look closely you’ll see them pulsing when he’s hard. His tip is also a very pretty pink color while his shaft and base are slightly darker than his skin tone. His balls aren’t too big either so it’s definitely more about his dick. He doesn’t cum a lot either surprisingly, he’s never been the cum everywhere and get super messy type of person but if hasnt had sex or jerked off it’ll be more than usual.
CHOSO
choso is closer to nanamis size, maybe a little smaller but not a huge difference. His is pretty average but there is nothing wrong with that (can I get free ride???). Just like geto he also has a very pink tip and his shaft is the same color as his skin. His girth is around Gojo’s but he has some big balls that are just asking to licked and sucked fr. Baby boy gets so whiny when he’s hard and leaking that he’s almost embarrassed by it, he tries to control it but he literally can’t stop getting so hard to point it drives him insane. His cum is stringy and thick, like the perfect consistency for cumming on your face, chest, ass, literally anywhere. He cums a normal amount, usually spurts out super quickly and then slows down towards the end of his orgasm.
SUKUNA
where do I even begin??? Clearly, this mf is the biggest out of all of them. He’s scary asf because he has two, yes, two dicks that are practically identical. 8-9 inches long, 4.7 girth. End my life. THIS MF GOT 4 LEGS. It’s actually cruel. They’re thicker towards the base and gradually get narrow towards the tip. So at first, the stretch doesn’t seem that bad until you realize you got about 7 inches more to go…yeah. His cocks are darker than the rest of his body and his tips are sort of like a light pink/tan color. The only difference between his cocks is that one is super veiny and the other quite literally has like 3 veins. Fat breeder balls that hang, swing, touch the floor (I’m jk) but literally the mix of toji and nanamis balls. They hold so much cum, he can literally go round for round back to back and fill up every hole of yours without taking a break. And he cums so much that it’s actually concerning. Like nanami, its overflows maybe once in a while it will shoot out.
HIGURUMA
believe it or not I think this man is packing at least 7-8 inches. It may not look like it but I think he does! He never brags about it either so it’s really hard to guess. When he’s hard his dick touches his belly button…and his balls are somewhere between Geto’s and Gojo’s size so they’re kinda average. The color is slightly tan maybe like one shade darker and he has a pale pink tip. Did I mention he has a fat tip?? It seems like it gets even bigger when he’s hard, all swollen and everything. His girth is pretty average too like Gojo’s maybe slightly bigger like 4.5 but that’s it. Higuruma doesn’t cum that much it like toji where it’s a pretty normal amount. His cum isn’t super white either, it’s kind of on the clear side and super stringy which is perfect for cumming on your tongue imo
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motorsportbarbie13 · 1 day ago
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A Package Deal
In which Lando befriends a single mom without even realizing it.
Warnings: single mom. talk of parental death (no death featured on page), lando being a judgey jerk at first, kinda? Pairing: Lando Norris x SingleMom!Reader Word Count: 5.4k words
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109 likes liked by yourdad, BFFsarah, McLaren, and others yourusername Work holiday party with my mini me! yourdad my two favorite girls! >>>yourusername thanks dad! <3
The fairy lights that stretched back and forth across the ceiling of the McLaren Technology Center sparkle down at you, a soft glow illuminating the spacious front lobby. Half a dozen 12 foot Christmas trees dot the cavernous room and tables decorated with rich red, green, and silver accents create intimate seating areas throughout. The only things indicating that the offices were home to McLaren's Formula 1 team were the seven or so F1 cars from past and present, all put on display for tonight's party.
The events team had certainly outdone themselves this year, that was for sure. If there was anything the McLaren events team went hard for every single time, it was the MTC's annual family holiday party. This year though, the entire team had extra reason to celebrate: earlier in the month, the team had brought home the Constructor's Championship for the first time in years.
"Momma, where's Aunt Sarah?" Your six year old daughter Stella asks softly, her little hand tucked securely in yours as she looks around, eyes wide in awe at all the decorations.
"I don't know, munchkin." You reply, grinning down at her. "Do you want to see if we can find her?"
Your best friend Sarah was surely already here as she was one of the heads of the events team. She'd been planning this party for months now, the added pressure from the championship win had nearly driven her mad. A quick text is answered even quicker and you lead Stella towards the massive ballroom that sits on the opposite side of the sleek modern building.
As you walk down the hall, the heels of your stilettos clicking softly, you're surprised to be hit with a wave of nostalgia. You'd been working for McLaren for almost two years now, after Sarah had given the head of product development your resume when you graduated uni with a degree in computer science and data analytics. Marshall, the man who ran the department, had offered you a job as a data analyst on the spot when you came into interview the following week. It had all felt like divine intervention, going from getting pregnant so young and having no other choice but to navigate parenthood alone to finding yourself employed within weeks of graduating. McLaren truly felt like your second home now.
"There's my Stelly Belly!" Sarah cries when she sees Stella and you walking towards her. Without a second thought, your daughter drops your hand and flings herself into the waiting arms of your best friend, one of the few adults the little girl trusts enough to open up to.
"Don't you look pretty tonight?" Sarah coos, nuzzling her head into Stella neck, eliciting a squeal and a cascade of giggles from your little girl. "And your mama looks stunning too!"
Rolling your eyes, you smooth down the front of the red satin dress you'd bought last week. "Are you sure it's not too much?"
Your brows knit together in uncertainty. Ever since having Stella at 19, your life had revolved around the little girl. Everything you did and every choice you made was made because of her and with her best interest in mind. Going to university when she was a newborn had been for her benefit and the time spent away from her while you studied and attended classes were paying off now with your secure job and hefty paycheck. But you weren't used to calling attention to yourself, totally content with working behind a computer screen in your quiet office tucked in the back of the MTC. You came to work, socialized very little, and went home to your daughter. This kind of event was very much out of your comfort zone.
"Stop that." Sarah scolds as she sets Stella down. "You look so good you're going have the mechanics breaking their necks all night long."
"Okay, that's enough." You huff.
"Momma, Sarah says there's holiday crafts over there!" Stella points vaguely towards the other side of the room. "Can we go? Please?"
"Of course, sweetheart. Let's go."
"I'll take her!" Sarah volunteers, capturing Stella's little hand in hers before giving you a look. "Go get a drink or something. Have some fun. Stelly Belly and I will go make all the crafts!"
You watch after your best friend and the other half of your heart as they scamper away, Stella's red velvet dress fluttering behind her. Somewhere deep in the pit of your stomach, a painful clenching feeling takes root. For the past six years, your entire universe has revolved around that little blonde headed girl. Even now, though you spent more time apart from Stella than you cared for because of school for her and work for you, whenever she was out of sight it felt like a bit of you was missing.
Once you see her settle at the table right next to Sarah and begin coloring something in front of her, you turn away and wander towards the open bar. If there was one thing McLaren did right at these kinds of parties, it was provide top tier food and drinks for the employees.
You order a glass of what smells like the most heavenly mulled wine you've ever encountered and find a spot away from the crowd, leaning against a pillar in the shadows of the room. You weren't used to being around so many people and while you were glad Stella seemed to be enjoying herself, you could feel your social battery already draining.
"Well, if it isn't my favorite McLaren employee." A smooth voice interrupts your anxious thoughts.
You blush into your glass of wine, knowing who it was sneaking up behind you before you even turned around. "I'm telling Oscar you said that."
Lando slips in beside you, caramel colored cashmere jumper brushing against your bare arm. "You wouldn't dare." He says, bumping your shoulder gently. You can hear the smile in his voice without even looking.
When you say you don't socialize much at work, there is always going to be one exception to that rule: Lando Norris. He had wandered into your office one day about six months ago looking for the legal department of all places. Lando had sheepishly admitted he may have accidentally signed a contract to be the spokesman for a bank in Singapore while drunk on holiday and needed to see what how mad everyone was going to be. You then had to admit you were, in fact, just a software engineer and not a solicitor and he was not, in fact, anywhere near the legal department.
An unlikely friendship had been born that day though because instead of turning around and scampering away out of sheer embarrassment, Lando had plopped himself down in the chair opposite your desk and spent nearly an hour and a half peppering you with questions about your job.
Lando liked those moments he got to slip away during his busy days at the MTC to see you. It seemed like lately, he would find himself carving out time during his day to make a special visit to your office no matter what else he had scheduled that day. He liked the way you talked to him like he was a normal person and how easily you laughed at his jokes. You never made him feel stupid or inferior for asking questions about whatever project you were working on that day and you never asked him about racing. Not once. You were also the prettiest girl he'd ever seen and he was embarrassingly addicted to making you smile.
"You look stunning tonight." Lando says in a hushed voice. "Red is your color."
Although he's next to you still, Lando manages to steal little looks at you out of the corner of his eye. The red dress you've got on tonight should be illegal and it's showing off every dip and curve of your body. You pride yourself on how well you dress at the office but tended to stick with neutral colors and classic, conservative shapes that weren't jarring and allowed you to fade into the noise of a busy office a bit. The red was totally out of character for you and Lando found himself wanting to buy you an entire closet full of colorful dresses.
Your cheeks go crimson and you're thankful for the dim lights that hide it. "Thank you."
The other thing you're not used to is attention from men. Like your social life, any semblance of a dating life had been put on the back burner when you became a single mom. You didn't much miss it, if you were bing quite honest. Spending time with Stella was better than wasting a night on a man that would only end up disappointing you.
So when someone like Lando complimented you on the dress you wore you don't quite know how to react.
"Momma! Momma, look what Auntie Sarah and I made!" Stella interrupts anything that's about to come out of Lando's mouth when she runs up brandishing what looks to be a fairy wand tied with dozens of glittery ribbons.
You crouch down, not missing the way Lando stiffens beside you, and take the plastic wand out of Stella's hand. "Is this a magic wand?" You ask, voice breathy with awe.
"Yeah! Aunt Sarah helped tie the ribbons on after I picked them. They're all glittery and match Elsa's ice queen dress."
You smile, Elsa had always been Stella's favorite Disney princess. "That is so special, Stelly Belly."
A few feet away, Sarah takes in how close you and Lando were before Stella interrupted and smirks. "Come on, Stella. I think I saw a cookie decorating contest starting over by the wands!"
You stand, eyeing your best friend. "I can take her, Sarah. I'm sure you want to mingle."
"Nope! Stay. Talk. Be merry!" Sarah's eyes bounce between you and Lando and your cheeks heat at the implication.
Beside you, Lando rubs at his jaw trying to process the information he's just learned. Momma? This girl, cute as a button, was calling you mom? He rifles through his memory, trying to think of any time you'd ever mentioned being a mom and he can't come up with a single thing. And he's pretty sure he remembers everything you've ever said to him.
"You have a daughter." Lando says it more as a statement than a question and you wince.
This was always the part where you tended to lose people. Being as young as you were, you were used to people being put off by the fact that you had a daughter. A lot of people your age weren't ready for kids yet and had a hard time figuring you out because you had such radically different priorities. Neither set of priorities was better than the other, just different.
"I do. Her name is Stella." You respond, leaning against the pillar once again. The cool marble sends shivers down your back as you prepare to lose someone who had made more of an impact on you than you realized.
"You never said anything about her." He observes, his tone unreadable.
"You never asked." You shrug, trying not to get defensive. "Her pictures are all over my office, Lan. I've never hid the fact that I have Stella."
Lando thinks back, recalling the office he's spent so much time in lately. You're right, of course. There are bits of Stella all over the place in the drawings on your desk to the school picture that sits near the spider plant close to the window. But somehow Lando had never noticed anything else other than you.
He rubs at the back of his neck, "I guess I just assumed she was your niece or something."
"Nope. She's all mine."
"And her dad?" The moment the question slips from Lando's mouth, he regrets it. His eyes shutter closed but not before he catches a glimpse of the way you flinch.
He hates himself for thinking he deserves to be privy to this information. For being so bold as to ask for the sordid details of your life when all you are to each other is a casual work flirtation. He hates himself for implying that you'd ever flirt with him when there was someone else in the picture. Or worse, that you now have to relive a painful story behind why there wasn't.
"You don't have to answer that." God, he was so good at speaking before thinking, wasn't he? It had gotten him into so much hot water with the press this year during the championship run and here he was again, putting his foot in his mouth like an idiot.
"It's fine." You sigh, knowing that anyone who wants to be in your life is going to have to hear the story at some point. You just hadn't anticipated it happening with Lando, having been perfectly content with the safety of your innocent work flirtation.
"I had Stella when I was 19, her dad was killed in a car accident when she was eight months old. She turned six in September.”
The silence that stretches between you is heavy, clashing with the light and festive mood that swirls around you.
"Christ. I'm sorry, love."
You hate how painful that tugging sensation on your heart is when Lando calls you 'love'.
Shrugging, you hope you feign nonchalance well enough to fool him. You know it doesn’t.
“Listen, I should go check on Sarah and Stella, make sure Stella doesn't sweet talk Sarah into a puppy or something. Those two together is how I ended up with a kitten last year."
The brightness in your voice is all for show but Lando sees right through it.
You're gone before he can get a word in though.
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102 likes liked by BFFsarah, yourdad, yoursister, and others yourusername Quick trip into London for some last minute pressies! yourdad I'm a size Rolex in silver and gold please! >>>yourusername Ha Ha Ha, very funny father BFFsarah Brave brave girl! >>>yourusername brave or stupid, you decide!!!
"Come on, sweet girl, let's find your Papa a Christmas present so we can get out of this mad house."
You tug at Stella's hand, who was currently practically drooling over a display of sparkly gold and diamond jewelry in Harrods jewelry department. Around you, crowds swirl and people jostle each other as they all hustle to pick out their precious gifts before Santa's big night. Why you had chosen to come into London the weekend before Christmas was a mystery, but you were fully convinced that you had lost it when you had agreed to come to Harrods at Stella's request.
"But this necklace is so pretty, Momma!" Stella whines, eyes dragging over the diamond necklace on display in front of her.
"Yes, I know but I don't think your grandpa wants a diamond necklace for Christmas. Let's go up to the fifth floor where the kitchen gadgets are! You know how much he loves to cook!"
Stella rolls her eyes, which you choose to ignore. For all of her attitude today, Stella wasn't usually an ornery child. She was very well behaved and quite reserved so you gave her extra grace when it was crowded and loud like this. You knew she got overstimulated easily, just like you did.
"Fine." She sighs, casting one last longing look at the display. "Maybe Santa will bring me the necklace." She mutters and you have to tamp down a laugh.
You take Stella's hand in yours, despite her giving you another look of contempt. She was much too big of a girl to be holding her mother's hand, thank you very much. You ignored the glare and squeezed at your daughter's hand, knowing that she's not really angry at you.
Up on the fifth floor, the homewares section is significantly quieter than where you just were. Stella spots a display of colorful Kitchen Aid mixers that she scampers over to while you wander over to the espresso machines while reminding her to stick close. Out of the corner of your eye, you keep watch over her while debating the merits of different coffee machines.
"Well, if it isn't my favorite McLaren employee out in the wild." A velvety smooth voice sends familiar shivers down your spine.
"Favorite? You've been avoiding me since the holiday party." You quip without taking your eyes off the silver machine in front of you, knowing exactly who it is beside you without even looking.
Ever since the holiday party nearly two weeks ago, you hand't seen Lando at all despite knowing that he was at the MTC at least a few days. You hated that you knew that most of that time he had been out of the country, skiing in France then golfing in Spain. You also hated that you kept track of the amount of times you had known he was in Woking at the MTC and hadn't even bothered to stop in and say 'hi' to you.
Lando's hand rubs at the back of his neck. "I know. I'm sorry." His voice is low, tinged with guilt.
"Listen, it's fine." You turn to face him for the first time and your traitorous heart thuds a little harder in your chest. That mullet you teased him about so much at first had really grown on you and boy did it look good today.
"It's not like we're friends, Lando." You don't work as hard as you probably should to keep the frustration out of your voice. "You don't owe me anything and it's the off season for you. I shouldn't have said anything."
Lando frowns at you, confusion knitting his brow together. "We...we aren’t friends?" The hurt in his voice was unmistakable, tugging painfully at something in the pit of your stomach.
Your eyes shutter close at the look on his face. Lando might play the lovable goofball for the public and in the press but you knew better. You knew that he was a pretty big softie at heart and you immediately regretted your words, knowing that they would have struck him deep.
"What was I supposed to think, Lan? You seemed pretty put off when you found out about Stella and then you just..." You pause, unsure of where this anger was coming from. You hadn't really realized how hurt you had bene by his sudden ghosting until this very moment. "You just sort of disappeared. It's fine. I'm totally used to it."
The vulnerability in your voice makes Lando's heart clench painfully. He had been spooked initially about you having a daughter and he knew his reaction probably left a lot to be desired. He just had been so blindsided by the appearance of your little girl that night that he hadn't handled it well. Lando had been unwilling to admit before that night during the holiday party that he had been becoming more and more attached to you and he didn't know where Stella fell into place between you and him. It scared him, adding an entirely new layer to the budding friendship that you two had struck up. A friendship that he had been wanting to see if it could have progressed into more but now...now he didn't know.
"Momma, can we get Papa a mixer so he can make me more cakes next year?" Stella's small voice interrupts that awkward silence that had fallen between you and Lando.
You can't help the chuckle that leaves your lips despite yourself. "Stella, I don't think that's a very good reason to gift someone something."
"I don't know, sounds like solid reasoning to me." Lando chimes in, smile tugging at the corner of his mouth as he looks down at Stella. "Hi, I'm Lando." He crouches down so he's eye level with your daughter.
"That's a funny name." Stella regards Lando with a suspicious look. Stella is a quiet little mouse of a child most of the time and doesn't easily trust adults. There are very few people she's comfortable which is why her comment catches you off guard.
"Stella!" You scold, face going crimson at the lack of filter on her.
To your relief, Lando just chuckles. "I guess you're right, it is kind of a funny name. But I think Stella is a funny name too."
Stella' narrows her eyes but then she seems to realize he's just teasing her and she smiles. "I like you." She declares simply, as if deciding to be Lando's friend is the easiest thing in the world.
A fact that you already know is true.
"I'm hungry. Can we go get dinner now?" Stella turns back to you now and you startle a bit when you realize what time it is.
"Let me take you two to dinner. There's a place down the street that has some of the best chicken nuggets in all of England." Lando's offer throws you off for a moment you're so surprised. "As an apology for making you question our friendship."
Stella gasps as if that is the most exciting suggestion she's ever heard in her life. Your stomach does a quick swoop at spending more time with the driver outside of the office. You are a bit hesitant, pride still stinging from when he ignored you after the holiday party, but Stella looks so excited you find yourself nodding.
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Twenty minutes and one espresso machine later, you have the giant package shipped off to your house before walking towards a cozy pub that Lando suggests. It's strange to you, walking down the crowded streets with Stella tucked between you and Lando, listening to her prattle away. Once in a while, Lando shoots you a look over the top of your daughter's head that is all amusement and happiness.
Meanwhile, you're reduced to silence, listening in awe to Stella's babbling. She has always been a reserved little girl, following in her mother's footsteps of being an introvert. She doesn't open up to just anyone and even when she does find an adult she likes, it takes her quite a bit of time to talk to them the way she's talking to Lando as he navigates the three of you towards your destination.
Around you, people bustle up and down the sidewalk, the streets of London an absolute hive of activity and it's a bit overwhelming. You're momentarily worried about Stella, knowing she doesn't do very good in crowds just like you but then something catches your eye that has your heart leaping into your throat. Captured in Lando's large hand is Stella's tiny one, a silent gesture of affection from your six-year-old. The way your chest squeezes at the sight has tears pricking at the corner of your eyes.
Lando catches the look on your face, full of awe and something else he can't quite place, and when your gaze snags on his moments later he gives you a dazzling smile. When Stella had reached out to take Lando's hand a few blocks ago, he had panicked a bit. He wasn't too experienced with kids, his niece’s being much younger than Stella, but he felt something deep in his chest that told him when the little girl beside him reached for his hand, it was a sincere sign of trust from her.
"Here we are." Lando says once you're safely across the road. "I hope you're ready for the best chicken nuggets in all of London."
Dinner is a loud affair, Stella peppering questions left and right to Lando and Lando expertly fielding them. He even gets some questions in edgewise and has both you and Stella laughing the entire meal. It's the most relaxed Lando's seen you the entire time he's known you. Despite his initial reservations at spending time with someone who has a child, he finds himself not wanting the evening to end. He's never been so thankful for last minute gift requests in his entire life.
Your bellies are full when you spill out onto the sidewalk, the chilly London air biting at your cheeks. It was going to be a cold train ride home. You reach into your tote bag to pull out a scarf and hat, tugging both on Stella despite her yowls of displeasure.
"Stella." You sigh, finally getting her to leave her hat on her head after a tense few moments as Lando watched on, smile sitting at the edge of his lips. "Come on, it's cold tonight and you know the train isn't much better."
"Train?" Lando asks, frown appearing on his face.
"We took the train into the city today. Someone wanted an adventure." You look pointedly at your daughter, who just shrugs, totally unfazed by the chilly evening air.
"That's like, a forty-five minute trip! On the train? At night? Alone?"
Something twists in Lando's stomach at the thought of you and Stella all alone on the train at night. He knows the trains are, objectively, safe and you'd probably be fine but it just doesn't sit right with him knowing that he'd have to leave both of you at a train station unable to be with you in case something happened.
"I know." You breathe, knowing that the moment Stella sits down on the train she's going to be out like a light and you're going to have a very grumpy six-year-old on your hands on the other end of the line. "I don't have a choice, I'm not ordering an Uber home. It'll be fine, Lando. We do this all the time."
The thought of you navigating the crowded train alone with the tiny wisp of a girl that tucked her hand back into his as soon as she got close enough to him hurts a surprising amount. It's a jarring feeling, one that he's totally unprepared for. His memory darts back to the night he found out you had a daughter. He thought for sure the budding chemistry between you would fizzle out. He had thought that he wasn't interested in getting involved with someone who had a child because it complicated things to a degree he wasn't sure he was ready for. He still struggled with looking after himself successfully sometimes. Dating someone with a child? Up until this very moment, Lando thought that was completely off the table.
"You're not taking the train home. I'll drive you." Lando's voice has an edge of finality in it that tells you this is going to be a fight, one that you're not sure you're prepared to fight.
You blink up at him, unable to form a response for several moments. Beside you, Stella cheers. "Yes! No boring train!"
"Woah, slow down." You warn, shaking your head. "Lando, I appreciate the offer but we can't." Stella looks absolutely crestfallen next to you as she yanks her hand out of Lando's grasp and crosses her arms over her chest.
"Why not?" Lando's frown mirrors Stella's and you nearly laugh.
Beside the fact that he couldn't stand the thought of you on the train by yourself with Stella this late at night, Lando didn't really want the night to end. He had sat across from you at dinner and there were several moments while Stella chattered on that he caught your gaze and you had given him the most prettiest smile he'd ever seen.
"Well, for one, Stella needs a booster seat to ride in a car and I don't think those come standard in Ferrari's or McLaren's."
"For the record, I drove my Range Rover into the city." Lando retorts before glancing around the crowded city street. "Look! There's a Mamas & Papas across the street! That's where my brother got my niece’s carseat a few months ago. I'm sure they sell booster seats too."
You can't help but stare at Lando, a bit dumbfounded. When you had started getting to know the driver months ago, you had what you had thought was a pretty accurate idea of who he was off the track: young, sinfully good looking, deeply unserious, and only interested in partying and having a good time. But voluntarily spending an evening with you and your daughter? Offering to buy Stella a booster so he could drive you home? The way Lando surprised you in that moment had you swaying on your feet a bit.
"Can we, Momma? Please! I want to drive home with Lando!"
There are two sets of big puppy dog eyes turned on you and you find yourself tossing your hands up in the air in defeat. "That's not fair! You two can't team up against me!"
Lando looks down at Stella, mischievous grin overtaking his handsome face. "I think we won, Stelly Belly." He shout-whispers, eyes sliding over to you, giving you a wink.
"You two are going to be trouble together, aren't you?" Is the last thing you say before Lando grabs your hand and drags you towards the shop to buy your daughter a booster seat.
Tag List: @shelbyteller @formulaal @martygraciesversion381 @stelena-klayley @dark-night-sky-99 @luckylampzonkland @chlmtfilms @aykxz98 @forensicheart @cheer-bear-go-vroom @lieutenantchaos @willowsnook @sltwins @linnygirl09 @meglouise00 @mixedstyles @strawberryy-kiwii @secret-agents-stole-my-bunnies @mrosales16 @charlesgirl16 @leclercdream @eloriis @daemyratwst @dramaticpiratellamas @mochimommy2002 @bibissparkles @llando4norris @chelseyyouraverageluigi @iamaunknownsecret @maxivstappen @imlonelydontsendhelp @nina-or-anna-or-nora @a1leexxa @littlegrapejuice @sunflowervol18 @freyathehuntress @finn-dot-com @swiftie-4-lifes-stuff @chirasama @lauralarsen @dr3wstarkey @saskiaalonso
(As always if you want to be added or removed, send me a message!! ❤️)
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tsuutarr · 2 days ago
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Demon Delinquents x Human! Reader
Here's my gift for @ozzgin (who organized the secret santa event, tysm)!!
Content is about 1K words about you and your new delinquent demon besties <3
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You, a human, somehow ended up in a school filled with demons. Though, you’re surprised to see that everything is rather… normal? Despite your peers and teachers sporting horns and other demon-like features, your demon school really seems like every other school.
You’re introduced to your classmates who politely clap, before you’re ushered to your new seat. All normal stuff, really, except that you’re seated at the very back in between what looks to be two delinquent demons. And, just your luck, you seem to have caught their eye. They could probably drill a hole through your skull with how much they’re looking at you.
So it’s really no surprise when you’re called out to the back of the school when class is over. You’re trembling as the demons loom over you, sharp teeth glinting underneath the sun.
“You’re gonna be our hench human,” the demon with red skin cackles, smile wide. You’re pretty sure he could bite your head off.
“And you’re gonna like it,” the demon with yellow skin adds, his frown showing off all his sharp teeth.
You’re too scared to say anything, but they take your silence as agreement.
“Good!” the red demon guffaws, pointing to himself. “Name’s Rex.” He points to the yellow demon beside him. “This guy’s Lem.”
Lem juts his chin out at you. “‘Sup?”
You’re really not sure how to react, making the three of you just stare at each other.
Finally, Rex raises an eyebrow. “Yer name?”
“Oh,” you say, blinking, before stuttering out your name. Rex and Lem look pleased.
“A’ight, great.” Slinging an arm over your shoulder, Rex begins to maneuver you as he begins walking, Lem following behind closely. “First order of business…”
You’re going to die. You’re convinced of it. Why else would they be dragging you with them?!
Surprisingly, however, you find yourself in the cafeteria. Somehow, you expected demons to be more rowdy, but everyone seems to be minding their own business. Even Rex and Lem are standing in line, waiting for their turn despite being delinquents.
You’re not left too much time to ponder, however, since it’s soon your turn to order. You’re certain they’re going to make you buy their lunch, but they… don’t? They pay for their own food, before dragging you away again until you’re on the rooftop.
“Here,” Rex says, tossing you a sandwich. “A good hench human’s gotta be strong.”
“And ya only get strong by eatin’,” Lem adds, shoving a whole melon bun in his mouth.
You blink, sandwich in your hand, as Rex and Lem dig into their lunches.
Rex looks to you, before swallowing down his food. “What? Ya not hungry? Or d’you not like sandwiches?”
“Uh, no, just…” you purse your lips. “I guess I didn’t expect you to buy me lunch?”
“Tsk, tsk,” Rex says, wiping some mustard off of his bottom lip. “You’re our hench human now, ‘course we gotta feed ya. We can’t have a weakling followin’ us around.”
Lem nods in agreement.
“Uh, right.” You nod with a stiff smile. “Thanks.”
With a loud laugh, Rex rips open a bag of chips. “‘Course, hench human! Let us know if you’re still hungry, got it?”
“...Got it,” you agree, before digging into your own sandwich. It’s actually kind of good.
Since that point onwards, you continue to hang out with Rex and Lem. Contrary to their appearance, Rex and Lem are good students, always on time to class (and thus making sure you’re on time too). They’re not… really delinquent like, truthfully.
In fact, one time, you thought they were smoking, but they were just eating lollipops. Another time, you thought they were drinking beer, but it was just apple juice. Frankly speaking, they baffle you – other than their appearance, they don’t really… do anything delinquent-like. But they’re also convinced that they are doing something delinquent like.
“We’re showin’ up to class ‘cause we’re asserting our dominance,” Rex had explained when you asked why he wasn’t skipping class. 
Lem nodded sagely in agreement. “The class is all scared of us, y’see? We gotta show ‘em who’s boss.”
When you asked them about the lollipops and apple juice, Rex said, “It’s ‘cause lollipops and apple juice have a lotta sugar. They’re super dangerous, which is why we’re usin’ ‘em. We’re strong like that.”
“Yeah, we’re cool like that,” Lem agrees.
You honestly don’t really get their logic, but… they’re not bad to hang out with. They take you on bicycle rides (not motorbikes, though, since Lem is scared of them). They walk you home because, according to Rex, “No one’s gonna hurt our hench human!”
They’re strange guys, but they’re kind of fun in an endearing sort of way, maybe. You don’t really mind hanging out with them. Plus, they always buy you lunch. It’s nice eating with them on the rooftop.
“Man, I can’t believe midterms are comin’ up,” Rex groans, looking displeased as he tosses a chip into his mouth. “Gotta study.”
“You guys are studying for midterms?” you ask, making Rex and Lem nod solemnly.
“We hafta. How else are we gonna show the rest of them how scary we are?” Lem inquires, crossing his arms as he chews on his lollipop. “We gotta show ‘em that we’re the strongest.”
“Don’t worry,” Rex says, slapping your back with a grin. “Ya got us, yeah? We’ll make sure that no one can mess with ya. Lem and I are top five in the whole school – we can teach ya, no worries.”
You blink slowly, processing the information. They actually study despite being delinquents to the point that they’re top five in the entire school? Huh?! How does that make sense?
But as you watch them eagerly discuss how they’ll make study guides for you to help you study, you can’t help but let your incredulousness go.
Because, yeah, they’re not traditional delinquents… but they’re doing their best and they care about you a ton, so maybe that’s what really matters in the end.
Maybe.
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kamaluhkhan · 2 days ago
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IS IT CASUAL NOW?
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pairing: vi x fem!reader word count: 14.6k summary: you and vi are both tired of complicated relationships so try the whole friends-with-benefits thing....and maybe forget the whole point of your arrangement in the first place. warning: lesbian situationships (there is so much angst and yearning), brief mention of (internalized) homophobia and struggles with addiction....but mostly cheesy domestic fluff and smut [oral (vi receiving), fingering (both receiving), thigh riding, slight bondage play, switch!vi has my heart] (18+) ! a/n: merry (belated oops) xmas girls and gays <33 i've probably spent way too much time on this but it's my BABY....kinda based on leighton and alicia's plotline in s1 of sex lives of college girls and ofc casual by chappell roan (there are many other chappell references throughout too hehe). also yes i made a mini playlist that consists of the songs that i think reflect this fic's sun, moon, and rising signs....pls enjoy and happy holidays !!!
♪: "angel baby" by troye sivan (sun); "pretty girl" by hayley kiyoko (moon); "casual" by chappell roan (rising)
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“not even one week into the new academic year, violet rose atlas, captain of the varsity soccer team, has been suspended from gameplay due to recent unsportsman-like behavior, sentenced to 100 hours of community service, and banned from the local lesbian bar.” 
mel removes her eyes from the screen to raise an eyebrow at you. you just shrug and take a sip of your coffee. you glance over at the clock on the wall. 
11:09am. 
“to top it all off, she’s late,” you declare, trying your best to hide the anticipation simmering in your stomach.
“what’s your deal, anyways? you totally flirt with her whenever she’s at the bar. not even we get that good of service,” gert points out. they’re searching through a stack of cd’s and cassette tapes for something to play. 
“that was before.” 
you walk over to sit next to gert, taking it upon yourself to choose the music. you settle on jagged little pill; alanis morrissette’s lush voice is a welcomed addition to your conversation.
“our funding is at risk,” you explain. “it’s like the dean assigned her to us because she knew it would end terribly and the board would have an excuse to finally cut us loose.” 
“if they need an excuse, they’ll find one,” gert grumbles.
you shrug. “i just think violet is bad news, which is something i’d prefer we avoid..”
“the article does say that she punched maddie nolan in the face during an exhibition game against the piltover knights.”
“see? bad news. literally.”
“well, i think we lucked out,” sky gushes, though her focus remains on finishing her current project. she’s crocheting so fast that you only catch glimpses of her sparkly pink fingernails. you’re sure she’ll be done with this blanket before violet shows up. if she even bothers to show up. “the yellowjackets might’ve lost their captain, but we get to spend quality time with the hottest butch on campus.”
“whatever,” you sigh, though you don’t disagree with that description. you check the clock again — 11:11am — and settle against the worn couch. “since we have the time — mel, why don’t you read our horoscopes? i’m itching to see what the universe has in store for us today.” 
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
vi spent the better part of last night crying and getting wasted in her bathtub with cheap dye burning into her scalp. 
she just couldn’t stand the memory of caitlyn kiramman’s perfectly manicured nails running through her formerly pink locks as they kissed, tugging on vi’s hair to bring her closer —
enough. fucking pull yourself together. 
cait’s moved on, that much is clear, with someone more like her. someone whose last name is on buildings all around the university of piltover’s campus.
so far, no amount of bar fights or red cards or late nights in some random girl’s bed seem to mend the heart that caitlyn shattered to pieces, but vi doesn’t give up easy.
soon enough, she’ll be back on the field, leading the yellowjackets to victory at nationals; she’ll finish all her classes, graduate with honors and have a great plan for an even greater future; all while having amazing, mind-blowing sex that won’t lead to serious heartbreak.
relationships are overrated, anyways. 
the first step in this plan: spending 100 hours with a bunch of angry, bra-burning lesbians.
maybe vi will fit right in.
so, vi walks into her community service assignment with a wicked migraine and hands that look like lady macbeth plotted to murder an oil spill, but with her usual confident swagger nonetheless, as conversation echoes down the hallway.
“according to your rising, there will be a much needed spark in your romantic life. my guess is a fire sign is gonna sweep you off your feet.”
another voice chimes in, a gentle rumble. “could that be your sweet jules?” 
“i’ve never asked about her chart,” an achingly familiar voice replies. it brings back memories of dizzying lights and strong whiskey coursing through her blood, but something else, too. a sky full of stars and too-sweet alcohol on her tongue. “paula was a fire sign, though, and that blew up in my face.”
“paula was a walking red flag.”
“yeah, well, apparently red’s my favorite color.”
“maybe that was just the heartbreak you needed to bring passion back into your life. do you feel that with jules?”
“i don’t know — maybe? we haven’t had sex yet.” 
“passion isn’t just about sex, you know —”
“gert, i love you, but i cannot handle a sex therapy session right now.”
someone else giggles, bright and bubbly. “hm, i wonder what sign our pink-haired hottie is.” 
vi clears her throat to announce her arrival, leaning against the doorway.
everyone turns to look at her then, with varying degrees of shock, and vi feels like she’s just walked into an after midnight roommate vent session.
she isn’t sure what she expected the space to look like, but zaun university’s women’s centre is well-lived in, defined by a sort of organized chaos. each wall is covered in posters and collages, multicolored flags and fairy lights; there’s a shelf in the corner with assorted trinkets and books piled high, a table next to it with baskets of condoms, pads, and tampons and informational pamphlets, and a door in the opposite corner, slightly ajar. a vintage boombox placed on the coffee table plays 90s alt rock, circled by mismatched seating with patterned blankets and brightly colored pillows strewn about.
someone with dark lipstick and an eyebrow piercing is drawing on their converse; a dark brunette wearing glasses is draping a blanket over the arm of a couch; another person is scrolling on their laptop, a gold necklace glittering on their collarbones. 
vi’s attention is stuck on you, though, the origin of the aforementioned familiar voice: the very hot bartender from sappho’s, where vi happened to be kicked out of not even 72 hours prior. 
you’re wearing a vintage wonder woman t-shirt tucked into faded blue jeans with a carabiner clipped to a belt loop. the sleeves of your shirt are rolled up, displaying your array of tattoos — vi’s already decided that her favorites are joan of arc holding her sword, a pomegranate that’s been cracked open, and lyrics from bikini kill’s ‘rebel girl’ (which admittedly, vi had to look up when she first saw). it’s everything vi’s booze-soaked brain had apparently memorized after many nights of staring at you across the bar counter, licking up whatever honeyed flirtations you’d spill from your lips. vi always noticed your hands, too: the many rings you’ve stacked on your fingers, the lavender sprig sprouting from your middle finger and venus symbol etched onto your wrist, the nails that are always clipped short and painted black. 
one of those nails is tapping anxiously on your coffee mug, which has a picture of hayley kiyoko as lesbian jesus.
“pink-haired hottie, reporting for duty. though, i might need a new nickname.” vi grins; you roll your eyes. “i’m an aries, by the way.”
“good to know.” the brunette winks not-so-subtly in your direction before walking towards vi and extending a hand, gold bangles clinking together at the motion. “i’m sky, she/her. we had electromagnetic theory together last spring. it’s lovely to officially meet you.”
vi makes a big show of leaning down and kissing sky’s hand.
“nice to meet you, too, sweetheart.”
“such a gentleman,” sky giggles and leads vi to the patchwork couch. she curls up like a cat, and vi follows suit — the couch is cloud soft, and vi tries not to sink into the cushions. “i’m our supplies and communications coordinator.” she turns away from vi to look around the room. “okay, that’s my intro. who’s next?”
the person with an eyebrow piercing nods at vi, a sort of effortless greeting. “gert, they/them.” they snap the sharpie shut after writing ‘the future is intersectional’ on the tip of their toe. “i curate and design our newsletter, the black rose. i’m also in a band —”
“the sirens of zaun. yeah, i recognize you. you’ve played a few gigs at sappho’s.” 
vi looks at you pointedly, and you take this as your cue to disappear behind the door, which appears to lead into some sort of office.
gert seems pleased, though. “then you might also recognize our lead singer….”
the person with the gold necklace, who vi does, in fact, vaguely recognize but can’t quite name, closes their laptop and waves at vi. “i’m mel. pronouns: she/her. i mostly deal with the finances around here. and, from what i understand, you’re already well acquainted with our fearless leader —”
mel is cut off by the sound of her phone alarm. 
“shit — it’s already 11:30. our set at campus radio starts soon.” mel gestures at gert. gert picks up the bright red guitar case behind them and secures it around their shoulder as mel packs up her leather satchel. 
“damn, i gotta get to class, too. the space-time continuum waits for no one.” sky gets up and gathers her things, too, stuffing yarn into a fruit-printed tote bag. “it was nice meeting you though.” she pats vi’s head affectionately before throwing out a loud: “see ya later, boss!”
mel and gert offer similar farewells, and you shout goodbye from the other room before the three of them are out the door. vi expects you to reappear a few moments later; when you don’t, she ventures into the office.
it’s smaller, but just as decorated as the lounge space. there’s a desk that seems to be more storage than actual use, littered with piles of books and old copies of the black rose. you’re sitting on a fluffy rainbow carpet that looks like every member of sesame street stitched together, writing something in a sticker-covered notebook. 
“so, violet —”
“vi’s fine,” she tells you. she decides to sit on the floor next to you rather than the zebra striped chaise lounge.
you nod, rip a page out of your notebook, and hand it to vi. there’s something a bit too intimate about knowing what your handwriting looks like before even knowing your name. 
“this is a run down of everything you’ll need to know, but real quick: we do feminist film fridays and trivia tuesdays on alternating weeks; our radical reads book club meets once a month, along with our slam poetry group, and we have a bunch of other events in between — workshops, art builds, discussion groups, and so on. sky keeps everything in the centre stocked, and occasionally the rest of us will pitch in when organizing a charity drive. our newsletter publishes the third wednesday of every month — gert puts it together, but we print in pairs since it could be a lot of work for one person. we have team meetings once a week to share updates, make sure we’re all on the same page, stuff like that. any questions?” 
“wow, okay. that’s a lot.”
you smile. “i’m sure you’ll be able to keep up, varsity.” 
“so….where do i fit in?” 
“that depends on you, really,” you tap your glitter gel pen on your notebook, thinking. “like, i’m assuming you’re not well versed in feminist literature.”
vi puffs out her chest. “based on what assumptions? i’m not a dumb jock.”
“yeah, i know you’ve made the dean list ever since your freshman year.” 
vi raises an eyebrow. “keeping tabs on me, wonder woman?” she teases. 
you laugh. “don’t flatter yourself. sky’s the one who mentioned it to me. so, unless you mean your very large, unpaid tab at sappho’s...”
“the bar i was kicked out of, you mean.”
“well, yeah, because you —” you take a deep breath. “not the point. anyways, we don’t have a complete schedule for book club, so you can maybe take the lead on one of our meetings. do you have a favorite author?” 
vi smiles at you sheepishly. “ah…..you got me there.”
“thought so,” you smirk and vi covers her blush. “if you’re curious, this bridge called my back is a good place to start. oh, and audre lorde is a classic and a personal favorite…..” you pause when you catch vi staring at you. she wants you to keep talking, to appreciate the way your eyes light up so enthusiastically, but you blink away, and a veil of professionalism falls back onto you. “sorry. anyways, we’re having trivia tomorrow — would you be able to help us out with that?
vi nods. “sure.”
“sweet.” you check your phone. “i’ve got a coffee date, so i should get going.”
“wait — you never told me your name, wonder woman.”
“well, it’s not diana prince,” you quip before finally introducing yourself. 
“nice to finally put a name to the face.” vi winks at you, standing up. she extends a hand to guide you up. your hand is cold against her skin, your metal rings even colder.
“i’ll see you around, varsity.” before you’re out the door, you turn back around. “oh, and vi?”
“yeah?”
“don’t be late.”
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
you had stepped away for a quick smoke break — a habit you knew you had to kick — but you’re so fucking drained and it’s only wednesday. 
you were up all night bickering with your girlfriend. it started with her admitting that she really doesn’t want to meet your friends, which transitioned into her asking you to not talk to anyone about her or your relationship, which prompted you to make a (maybe slightly insensitive) comment about how she’s welcome to stay in the closet but has no right to push you back in. 
needless to say, you did not get any sleep.
you’re about to walk outside, and finally get a moment of peace, when your phone rings. it’s your sibling, and the fact that they’re calling instead of texting tells you that this conversation is about to be (A) exhausting, (B) infuriating, or (C) both.
the correct answer is C.
it’s the same story over and over again: your dad drinks too much, your mom is absent. it hadn’t been this bad when you were growing up, but you suppose you’d been around to ease the damage, or at least step in and take care of your sibling as needed. 
“just — take a deep breath. you can come stay with me for the weekend, okay? it’ll be good for you to get away from the chaos for a bit….we’ll go apple picking if the weather’s nice, maybe start working on your halloween costume — whatever you wanna do.”
“you know, i’m not five anymore,” they mumble, stifling a small laugh along with some tears. “but…okay. that sounds nice.”
you smile to yourself, shoulder pressing against the door. “it’s a plan then. we’ll sort out the details later. and, don’t worry about mom and dad — i’ll take care of it. love you.” 
you hang up and exhale as you finally push the door open, happy to finally get one moment to breathe.
except, just as you’re greeted by a crisp breeze on this beautiful late september evening, you’re also greeted by the sight of vi pressing someone against the brick wall, their legs wrapped around her waist as she kisses their neck.
something ignites in your abdomen, familiar after many nights of seeing vi at the bar, charming her way into another woman’s bed. except, it’s definitely not jealousy, this time.
(okay, maybe it is; but only a bit.)
they spring apart upon hearing the door slam closed. you recognize who vi’s with — maya, a sophomore who’s frequently attended women’s centre events since last year. she’s always been friendly with the team, but never this friendly.
“oh my gosh, i am so sorry!”
“you don’t have to apologize,” you tell her sincerely. her cheeks are flushed, and she’s busy smoothing down her skirt, clearly trying to distance herself from vi, who’s leaning against the wall nonchalantly. “i just need to talk to violet, so do you mind giving us a sec?”
you wait until maya disappears inside to cross your arms and glare at vi.
“so, it’s violet now, huh?” she teases, wiping red lipstick off her smirk.
“you were supposed to be helping facilitate this workshop,” you note. 
“well, it is a queer sex ed workshop.” vi rolls her eyes. “i was giving maya a hands-on experience.”
you grit your teeth together. “and you just had to do that now? like you just had to go down on that third year during trivia last week?”
“well, see, i don’t have a ton of free time, and since i’m not allowed at the local lesbian bar….” she trails off, looking at you pointedly. “i’ve had to resort to multi-tasking.”
“multi-tasking.” you let an exhausted, bitter laugh slip from your lips. “you’ve showed up late to every single event in the past few weeks, and once you’re there, you’re either on your laptop, getting drunk, or hooking up with someone. tell me, violet, as captain of the yellowjackets — if someone on your team was acting like this, what would you do?”
vi narrows her eyes at you, like she can’t believe what you’re asking, and admits, “i’d call them out, tell them to do better.”
“right. and if they kept giving you empty promise after empty promise? you’d have to do something more drastic, even if you didn’t want to, yeah?”
no response.
shaking your head, you take out a cigarette. there’s only silence when you flick the lighter open and light it between your lips. you inhale deeply, letting the smoke enter your lungs, exhale slowly, and decide: “i’m gonna ask the dean to reassign you.”
“fine by me,” vi scoffs, but you swear that something close to disappointment flashes across her face. “clearly, this isn’t working out.”
“clearly.” you take another drag of your cigarette, and as vi walks back inside, you can’t help but try to get under her skin. you’ve had a bad week, between family drama and turbulence in your relationship with jules, and you’re just sick of people not giving a shit. “the year’s already started, so i doubt there’s something available. which means you’ll remain on academic probation until spring.”
and, okay — you do get some twisted satisfaction in how that makes vi stop in her tracks. you’re leaning against the wall, and she strides over to stand in front of you, her jaw and fists clenched.
“i’ll miss the whole tournament.”
you shrug, and blow smoke in her face. “i’ve given you plenty of chances.”
“but the team needs me —”
“you should have thought of that before you fucked up, varsity,” you snap. vi’s eyes widen; you’re usually more level-headed. “you’re cocky, irresponsible  — ”
“i lost my scholarship,” vi blurts out, prompting you to pause, the cigarette millimeters from your lips. 
you blink at her, blood still roaring in your ears.
“i…don’t know why that’s relevant.”
vi just sighs, so deeply that you feel it in your bones. you haven’t seen this side of her before — no flirtatious smile, no overconfident posture. instead, she slips to the ground, knees pressed to her chest. feeling a bit guilty for pushing her buttons, you slide down next to her. you offer her the cigarette, but she shakes her head.
“i…i’m going through a shitty breakup. i’ve been lashing out, and i lost my scholarship. i haven’t asked my parents for money, because the last thing i want is for them to worry about me. so, i started picking up these odd jobs to make ends meet, and the hours are a bit crazy so between school and practice and — fuck, there’s also shit going on with my sister that i won’t even get into now, but it’s a lot — and i also need to do this because i let my team down and i need to be there for them, whatever it takes, and i’m just so fucking —”
“exhausted, yeah.” 
you can see more clearly now — the slump in her shoulders, the shadows underneath her eyes; you see her more clearly. you realize that you might have more in common with violet rose atlas than you initially thought.
“so the laptop —”
“finishing assignments.”
“the drinking?”
vi juts her chin out at your smouldering cigarette. “we all have our vices.”
“and the sex?”
her lips curl into a sheepish grin, and she shrugs. “we all need to relieve stress.”
you clear your throat, blinking away from her gaze and trying to ignore how you can feel warmth radiating from her body, so close to yours. “right.”
vi runs her hand through her tar-black hair. that should have been your first hint — nothing says lesbian breakup more than terribly dyed hair and questionable decisions. 
“look, i know i can’t do everything, but i have to, and i’m still trying to figure out how.”
“well….as far as excuses go, it’s not the worst,” you admit. “thanks for telling me. i know that couldn’t have been easy.” you take a deep breath and get to your feet. “i stand by what i said earlier, though — this isn’t working out. you just can’t tell us that you’ll be helpful and not follow through. it means a lot, to a lot of people, that there’s a space like this on campus. mel, gert, sky— they all work so hard to make that happen, and that’s something i need to protect. i’m sorry.”
“wait.” vi grabs your wrist before you can leave. “i’m sorry. really, i am. i promise to do better.”
“you’ve made that promise before,” you point out. “why should i believe this time will be different?”
“because…you’re right. i’ve been too caught up in myself, in what i need, in what my team needs. i can see that you really care about your team, though, and i should have respected that. they’re — you’re — amazing, everything that you do to make people feel safe and heard and loved. i’m sorry for taking that for granted.”
wow. okay. 
you did not expect that. you’re hoping that vi can’t feel your pulse quicken at her words, but you’re glad that she’s holding on to you, keeping you steady.
“yeah, well…flattery’s not gonna get you far.” you clear your throat. “but, you’re obviously going through a lot right now, and it can drive you crazy, feeling like you’re the one who —”
“has to keep everything together,” vi finishes, sliding to the ground once more. you follow. “seems like i’m cracking under pressure, this time. fucking everything up.”
“you’ve got a reckless streak.”
“must be the aries in me,” she laughs, softly. “apparently it’s my Ieast attractive quality. along with my stubbornness and selfishness.”
“well, i don’t think that’s the whole picture,” you assure her. vi looks at you incredulously. “i won’t lie and say that your actions aren’t….thoughtless sometimes. you’re more self-centred than selfish—”
“hey!” 
“but you obviously feel some sense of responsibility, for your team, your family, for what you think is right. hell — the reason my boss asked me to kick you out is because you started a bar fight with that frat boy who was insisting he had the right dick to set lesbians straight.”
vi scoffs. “asshole.”
“i was about to throw him out, but you beat me to the punch. literally.” you nudge your shoulder against vi’s, and she chuckles. “and, yeah, you’re stubborn, which can be annoying, but it also means that you’d never give up, that you’re willing to keep trying despite the odds, so….” 
“so….?”
vi’s looking at you with the widest, softest eyes. fuck, you never expected her to be this gentle, so much so that it you want to melt to her every need. 
“i’m hoping third time’s the charm, varsity.”
vi smiles, the most sincere one she’s probably ever given you, and the scar on her lip stretches; for all your talk about responsibility, there’s a part of you who’d risk pushing your already tenuous relationship with your girlfriend to its breaking point just so you could kiss vi, guilt-free, just once. maybe you have a bit of a reckless streak, too.
“thanks, wonder woman. you won’t regret it.”
yeah. you kind of already do.
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
vi would never admit it, but one reason she fought to keep her community service assignment here is because she wanted to keep seeing you. 
she likes getting under your skin, seeing those pretty eyes roll whenever she strides in late for a meeting, that kissable jaw clench any time you catch her tangled up with someone else. 
it almost makes up for all those nights at sappho’s you’d spent flirting back and forth, some sort of unspoken agreement between you to never go further.
sometimes, it’s just nice to have a crush in your back pocket, to know that they’ll always be there to admire and admire you back while others come and go.
the more time you spend together, though, the more vi realizes that you’re not just a fictional character in her head, in a fantasy she pictures before bed — no, you’re tangible.
vi watches as you bring special tea for gert when their period cramps are particularly painful; she listens to you console mel after another fight with her mother and offer advice to sky when she was hoping to ask out her lab partner. vi notices how you prefer your coffee with a dash of cinnamon; and she learns that you had your first kiss with a girl in your freshman year journalism class, and that your first tattoo was done by the same person. a stick-and-poke star on your ankle.
she can hear your laugh, feel the cool metal of your rings brush against her skin accidentally when you’re squeezing past her in a crowded room, smell your perfume when you hug her goodbye. you have stories and quirks and expectations and opinions that vi subconsciously files away as she gets to know you better.
you’re not just a crush, anymore. 
you’re a friend. 
vi likes having you as a friend. really — she does!
you’re a friend who makes vi’s heart jump at the sight of your name on her phone. a friend who smirks when vi blushes after you tell her she has the prettiest cheekbones you’ve ever seen. a friend who mentions this vibrator that gave you one of the best orgasms you’ve ever had, so vi orders the same one and maybe still pictures you before bed, imagining that you’re using it at the same time. except someone else might be next to you.
yeah, vi’s pretty sure you’re dating someone, but that’s something she hasn’t gathered enough information on. 
not that it matters. she wouldn’t be interested in anything serious, anyways, after the mindfuck that was her relationship with caitlyn, and the damage she’s still having to heal from.
though, if that hadn’t happened, vi would have never gotten into a fight with maddie nolan, the second striker for the piltover knights, who taunted her during an exhibition game about how caitlyn is so much happier now that she isn’t disgracing herself with a filthy zaunite. vi would have never been banned from the first half of the tournament and chewed out by coach sevika for fucking up the yellowjackets’ chance at nationals. 
vi would have never been put on academic probation and assigned to 100 hours of community service, either.
she certainly wouldn’t have been here, now, in the women’s centre office close to midnight on a tuesday, folding the most recent issue of the black rose when you walk in.
“oh. hey, v.” you drop down on the zebra-striped couch, your tote bag falling to the ground. “i thought sky was gonna be here tonight.”
vi shakes her head, removing one earbud and letting it dangle from the cord. “she’s got this huge chem report due tomorrow, had to meet up with viktor to get it done.”
“right…” you sigh and lie back on the couch, staring up at the ceiling. a few moments pass, and there’s only your steady breathing. “what are you listening to?”
your eyes are closed when vi settles in next to you. it’s a relatively tight fit, but it doesn’t seem like either of you particularly care. vi gently places an earbud in your ear.
you snort, opening your eyes. “you could have just said the cranberries.”
“i’m surprised you recognize them,” vi quips. “it’s not your usual angry girl music.”
“well, sometimes people surprise you. this is actually one of my favorite songs,” you explain. “it’s in one of my favorite movies, too.”
“you’ve got mail?”
you furrow your brows. “when harry met sally.”
vi shakes her head. “no, ‘dreams’ is definitely in you’ve got mail. but, i agree that when harry met sally is a better movie.”
“you’ve watched nora ephron movies and enjoyed them?”
“well, sometimes people surprise you,” vi teases. “i can appreciate a good love story as much as the next person.”
you let out a short, airy laugh. you tilt your head and you’re so close to vi that you’re practically exchanging the same breath. your eyes land on her lips for a millisecond, and vi starts to lean in before you sit up abruptly. 
“i could use some alcohol.” you climb over vi and go to the desk, pull out a half empty bottle of fruit-flavored soju from a drawer. you grab two mugs — the hayley kiyoko one, and another with frida kahlo. you stop short of pouring, looking to vi. she nods. 
soon enough, you’ve got your legs strewn along vi’s lap, sipping lychee infused alcohol. 
“can i ask you something?”
“anything,” vi answers, squeezing your calf.
“why’d you and caitlyn break up?” the question hangs in the air for a second before you add: “if you don’t wanna talk about it though, i understand.” 
shit. it’s definitely not vi’s favorite topic of conversation, but….
“i think she thought that i was one of the good ones, that regardless of the way i grew up or the blood that coursed through my veins, i would be her perfect little charity case. people would be like: future president kiramman definitely cares about the poor — just look at the broke angry lesbian she’s turned into her docile wife!” 
you suck in a sharp breath. “fuck that.” 
“yeah,” vi laughs sadly. “the worst part is that she wanted me to be vulnerable with her, so i was, because i thought the more i opened up, the more she’d love me, but, in the end….i was too messy. i was too much.” 
vi hates the lump that starts to build in her throat, the tears that threaten to spill. she cannot cry in front of you —
you grab her hand. your skin is cool against hers, and it eases her quickening heartbeat.
“you’re not too much, v.” your voice soothes her like honey, trickling down her throat. “it sucks, though, when they ask you to rip your heart out of your chest and get mad at you for bleeding out in front of them.”
“shit, i never thought of it so…viscerally, but that’s exactly what it feels like.”
“well you’re not a creative writing major,” you quip. “i know it still hurts — trust me, i know — but your heart was never hers if she treated you that badly. you deserve more.” 
is it the alcohol messing with her brain, or does it look like you want to kiss her?
fuck. 
vi clears her throat. “why’re you asking?”
you pull your hand away, take a sip of your drink. “jules broke up with me a few days ago.”
you’re single now. good to know. 
“what happened?”
“i caught her kissing someone at a bar. a boy.” you roll your eyes. “maybe she just wasn’t ready, which is fine, but when we had it out, she told me that what we had isn’t what romance is supposed to feel or look like, which sucked. especially after being so….vulnerable with her.”
“you offered her that bleeding heart of yours, didn’t you?” 
you click your tongue, pouring some more soju into each mug. “course i did, v. and it didn’t mean anything in the end. because relationships suck.”
“i’ll drink to that.” 
you cheers, keeping eye contact. 
“and you know what?” you take a big, long gulp. “i know that relationships aren’t just about sex, but i’ve been having to get myself off for months now and sometimes, i just want someone else to —”
“take care of you?”
vi sips her drink, watching you mull over her words.
“not sure if i’d put it like that,” you decide. “i just miss that excitement. when another person wants to discover what makes you feel good, and wanting to learn how to make them feel good, too. i miss having that connection with someone.” 
“i’m guessing you didn’t have that with jules, then.” 
“ha! no. and paula…the girl i dated before….let’s just say, she didn’t give a shit whether i felt good, in any sense.” you shift in your seat; vi senses there’s a story there, but she doesn’t push. “how about future president kiramman — she take care of you?”
vi can’t help but laugh. “nah. i mostly took care of her. she sure liked it when i got down on my knees for her.”
you hum. 
“lucky her.” 
you wink at vi, and she chokes on her drink. 
i would gladly do it for you, if that’s something you want.
“is that a genuine offer? because, if you’re joking —”
shit. did vi say that out loud? 
vi’s heart is beating out of her chest, but she sits up straighter to regain some level of composure. she nods. 
no use in turning back now.
“i’m serious, wonder woman.”
you stare at her. “i really can’t have another relationship that’s just gonna crash and burn.”
“that’s not what i’m offering. i care about our - our friendship. i care about you.”
you swallow. “i care about you, too.”
“right, and when our friends need help with something….”
“we help them,” you finish. “so, you’re really just talking about casual sex. right now, on this couch?”
“yes,” vi answers. maybe a bit too quickly. “if that’s what you want, too.”
“that’s what i want,” you reply. maybe a bit too quickly, too. “but none of this one sided bullshit: you do me, i do you.”
vi takes your mug, puts it next to hers on the floor, and repositions your bodies so that she’s hovering above you, hips set between yours.
“sounds perfect to me.” 
you finally, finally kiss and it feels oddly…familiar. you taste like lychees and nicotine and cherries, burnt sweetness, and your skin is so fucking soft.
“wait.” you tug on vi’s hair and she has to bite back a moan at how fucked out you already look underneath her, all wide-eyed and desperate. “just so we’re 100% clear: just sex.”
vi nods once. “no strings attached.”
“it’ll be casual.” 
“we’re not doing the whole relationship thing.”
“promise?”
vi sticks out her pinky, grinning at you sheepishly. you roll your eyes ever so slightly, but still wrap your pinky around hers.
“promise.” 
so, you take care of each other. no strings attached.
because that’s what friends are for, right? 
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
v ⚽
are u busy rn? got out of my lab early and im bored 
wndr wmn ☆
yeah, im at work
v ⚽️
leave early. im BORED and HORNY
wndr wmn ☆
ofc you are 
v ⚽️
pls u love it 
u know #6 isn’t just my jersey number ;))
i’m implying that i will give u 6 consecutive orgasms
wndr wmn ☆
yeah i got that 
v ⚽️
so….
wndr wmn ☆
….
leaving now
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
“you sure about this, v?” 
vi hums, looking up at you through hooded eyes. “isn’t it every girl’s dream to get tied up by the lasso of truth, wonder woman?”
you’re straddling her, still wearing your red and gold bodysuit underneath blue shorts that you’ve decorated with silver stars. your makeshift lasso of truth — really, just some gold rope — sparkles, tying vi’s wrists together to the headboard.
the theme of the women’s centre halloween celebration is always the same — dress up at your favorite female icon — but you’d never seen someone look as good as vi does. she dressed as trinity from the matrix, all tight, black leather and vinyl, showcasing her defined muscles as the gods intended.
now, she’s left in a sleeveless cropped top and black boyshorts, with her pants and jacket thrown somewhere on your apartment floor. 
you have a feeling she really liked your costume, too, because she practically begged you to take control tonight. 
“if it gets too much, our safeword will be —”
“sappho.” the slight whine of impatience in her voice sends a jolt right to your core.
“perfect.”
you kiss her lips, her jaw, her neck, your lipstick leaving angry red marks. you lodge your bare thigh in between vi’s legs, biting your bottom lip when you feel her already warm and wet, when you hear her whimper as you apply more pressure to where she needs you most. you reach into your nightstand for your vibrator and switch it on, teasing vi’s nipples through her shirt. 
vi moans, deep and loud. not even thirty seconds, and she’s already pulling at the restraints, the headboard creaking. 
“are you gonna be a good girl for me, violet?” you coo, inching the vibrator lower and lower, feeling her shake underneath you. “because we’ve got all night, and you better not break my bed.”
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
“hey, so — i found these in between one of the couch cushions, thought maybe they might be yours.”
you can only spare a glance at the item mel is holding up — you’re grading freshman papers, focused on this one student’s thesis about gender fluidity in shakespeare’s twelfth night.
“oh, those are vi’s.”
“hm. and just how is it that you know what her underwear looks like?”
you stop writing mid-sentence and look up at mel who’s giving you a pointed look. 
you and vi had been the ones to clean up after feminist film friday last week, and one thing led to another….
in your defense: vi had been wearing these low cut jeans that showed off her v-line, and you could tell she didn’t have her usual sports bra on because you could see the outlines of her nipple rings through her tight, white tank top. it took everything in you to wait until people cleared out during the credits of the watermelon woman to pin her down and have her whimpering for you.
“i just…guessed.”
“right.” mel rolls her eyes. “so, you and violet are….what? fucking? dating?”
you clear your throat and take a sip of lukewarm coffee. 
“we’re keeping it casual,” is all you say.
“are you sure that’s a good idea?”
you just shrug.
“just — be careful,” mel, always the diplomatic one, eases. she walks towards you, sits on the edge of the desk, and hands you the pair of black briefs. “i know we all teased you about it before, but i don’t want to see you get hurt. i’ve seen you get your heart broken one too many times.”
“it’s fine, mel,” you assure her, grabbing the piece of fabric and shoving it at the bottom of your bag. you’re visiting their owner after this, anyways. “vi and i are just friends helping each other out.”
mel raises an eyebrow. “well, you and i have been friends for years and we’ve never gotten that close.”
“that’s different.”
“how so?”
“i appreciate your concern,” you say, avoiding the question. “but it’s fine. nice, actually.” 
“it’s your life,” mel sighs. “maybe don’t fuck on our couches anymore, though.” 
your cheeks heat up. you turn your attention back to the essay in front of you.
“noted.”
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
vi starts showing up at your place after soccer. 
she’s allowed back on the field during games now, so she appears with a winning grin, a grass-stained uniform and fresh bruises on her knees. one time, she had the remnants of a bloody nose after a header gone wrong, and you could taste copper when she pressed her lips against yours before she hopped in the shower.
you keep her go-to body wash stocked — bergamot and cedarwood scented old spice — but she always walks out of the bathroom smelling like your mango-vanilla shower gel. sometimes even your coconut shampoo. she slips on one of your oversized graphic tees, drapes a light purple towel around her shoulders to avoid staining your shirt with her cheaply dyed black hair, fading back to pink with each wash. she walks over to the fridge in her soft gray sweatpants rolled at the ankles and cracks open one of the spiced-pear red bulls as you pull ingredients out for dinner. usually something quick and simple, since it’s always a long week and neither of you have capacity for anything more.
vi chops garlic and tells you about her game; you boil water for pasta and tell her about the latest drama between students in your literature class. 
you pretend you have all the time in the world.
because you both know that vi’s got the strap packed in her gym bag, that soon one thing will lead to another and she’ll be fucking you with it until you’re both sweaty and spent and exhausted in the best way possible. 
you’ve established this routine together, agreed upon several unspoken rules: no pillow talk once it’s over; no actually falling asleep in the other’s bed; no crossing that thin sapphic line between friendship and romance. 
no breaking that promise.
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
wndr wmn
wanna come over? i’m watching bend it like beckham
v ⚽️
MY FAVORITE!!
i would love 2
but lucky fell asleep on me 
we just finished devouring an xl pepperoni pizza 
wndr wmn
remind me again why your one-eyed golden retriever likes pizza so much?
v ⚽️
come on it’s cute
[v ⚽️ sent an attachment]
wndr wmn
yeah, you’re cute
v ⚽️
<3 
come over here instead?
wndr wmn
omw
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
vi whines, and you can’t help but roll your eyes.
“come on — hurry up.”
“you practically begged for this, v,” you chide. 
“yeah, but you’re taking too long and your hands are fucking freezing.”
“it’s the irony deficiency, babe,” you quip. “now, are you gonna be a good girl and let me finish?”
“fine,” vi grumbles. she does stop squirming, though. you hum, pleased.
you certainly didn’t miss the way her breath hitches at the nickname. vi’s right hand, freshly polished, tightens on your thigh.
you’re not sure why she called you at 1:27am for your help with this, or why she couldn’t just do it herself, but you’re sitting on her lap, painting her nails the color of pomegranate juice, a color she had chosen from the options you brought.
sure, you were about to turn in for an early night, but the moment you heard her voice through the phone, you rushed over to her place wearing nothing but your pajamas — plaid boxer shorts and a spiderman shirt that vi wore last time she was at yours, and you haven’t washed since.
you stretch time out as much as you can, meticulous in every stroke, but painting her nails doesn’t take much longer. you start to move off her lap — it’s probably time for you to leave — but vi grabs your hips, a playful smirk on her lips.
oh, right. that’s the type of relationship — friendship — you and vi agreed upon.
shit. you’re pretty sure that you’re wearing your days of the week underwear. is it a turn-off that you’ve got on a saturday pair on a thursday?
it doesn’t really matter, anyways.
instead of initiating a kiss, vi takes the bottle of polish from you, swaps it for black, and gestures for your hand. you blink at her, until you realize what she’s asking.
“oh! you don’t have to —”
“you do me, i do you.” vi grins at you. “i thought that was our arrangement.” 
you laugh, feeling warmth radiate from your chest.
it’s kind of….adorable, the furrow of her brow, the way she curses under her breath when a drop of nail polish falls onto your skin. she’s surprisingly gentle, too, one of her hands holding yours for support while the other paints. 
while she focuses on getting the polish onto your nails in even layers, you busy yourself by counting vi’s freckles. 
violet rose atlas has a constellation of freckles sparkling across her cheeks. you hope there’s enough time in the world for you to memorize every single one.
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
v ⚽️
do u need more nicotine gum? 
im at cvs rn
wndr wmn
yeah that’d be great!!
v ⚽️
ok 
i’ll get u the cinnamon one
that’s the one u like right?
wndr wmn
yep!!!
v ⚽️
okay cool
im also gonna get u some of those iron supplements
wndr wmn
my hero 🙏🏽
thank you sm
v ⚽️
ofc
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
“that red head was trying to get your number.”
“are you jealous, v?”
vi scoffs, sipping her cherry coke. “of course not. i’m just observant.”
you’d convinced your manager to let vi back into sappho’s. it’s nice, really, to see her back here again. 
nice, but different. 
gone are the days of staring at her from across the room, where she would be charming someone else, and only flirting with you when she came over to get another whiskey for herself and vodka something for her date. instead, she jokes around with mel, sky, and gert if they’re around, and sometimes brings her teammates in as well to play a game of pool. she usually has one drink, and then switches to something non-alcoholic. sometimes, vi doesn’t even come in for a drink; she just stops by to say hi before a team dinner or a study session.
(it’s fine — never once have you gotten an overpriced coffee from the cafe she started working at mid-october, and you probably stop by once a week between errands. that’s your excuse, anyways.)
so. things are different, but nice. 
you lean across the sticky counter. “you want me to get down on my knees for you right now to prove which girl here i’d like to go home with?”
“baby….” vi shifts on the bar stool. it’s hard to tell under the dim multicolored lights, but you’re pretty sure she’s blushing, too. 
“i think we both know you’d draw a bit too much attention to yourself. especially when i use my tongue to —”
“my car’s outside.” 
you smirk. “my break’s in 15.”
you used to spend your breaks in the alley outside sappho’s burning through a cigarette. now you find yourself knee-deep in the passenger seat, eating vi out like she’s the last thing you’ll ever taste. 
“f-fuck,” vi groans. 
“feels good, yeah?” you tease her clit with her tongue, sliding two fingers into her easily. you work fast, determined to let her finish before you run out of time.
“so fucking good. i’m gonna —”
she clenches around your fingers; you lap her up eagerly, let her writhe against your face until she’s had enough. 
you sit back on your knees once her hips still, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand. you crane your neck to check the time on the dashboard, when you notice something in the footwell.
“vi! i thought i lost this.”
vi grins at you sheepishly, chest still heaving as you hold up the complete works of audre lorde, a tattered book with a well-worn spine and dog-eared pages. 
“sorry. i meant to put it back on your nightstand once i was finished.”
you open to where she’s placed a makeshift bookmark — the ticket from an underground sirens of zaun show you’d both gone to. you’ve had this copy since freshman year, the scribble of your handwriting in the margins of practically on every page.
“it’s okay,” you tell her. “you like it so far?”
“yeah.” she grabs the book from you gently, thumbing through the pages. you wonder if vi registers the curves of her own smile, tender and bashful. “honestly, i’m not usually a fan of poetry, but it’s really cool how lorde writes about desire between women in such a tangible way, you know? i really liked this one verse in ‘recreation:’ ‘touching you, i catch midnight as moon fires set in my throat.’ it’s just so - so beautiful, the idea of something so domestic and mundane being almost magical, because that’s what it’s really like when —”
you don’t even realize that you’re staring until vi looks up at you and freezes.
“sorry,” she clears her throat, closing the book and setting it aside. “did i say something wrong?”
you assure vi that she did nothing wrong. 
you exit her car, the taste of her lingering on your tongue, the feeling of her keeping your body warm on this cold november night.
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
wndr wmn
hey
are you in town during break?
v⚽️
having dinner at my dads’ on friday but otherwise im here
why? u gonna miss me?? 
wndr wmn
lol
im having ppl over for friendsgiving on sunday
if you wanna join
v ⚽️
hell yeah
can i bring anything?
wndr wmn
just your pretty face
i’ll take care of the rest
turkey, cranberry, sauce, stuffing, sweet potatoes, pumpkin pie…
etc. etc.
v ⚽️
damn!!!!
full course meal
wndr wmn
yep
im basically wife material
v⚽️
pls we’re so over gender norms
but yeah
you are
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
vi has never been the type to wait by the phone for a girl to text, or to show up at her place after not hearing from her in a while, worried that she might have done something wrong. 
yet here she is, standing outside your door.
it’s cool, though. completely platonic behavior.
she knocks. 
there’s no answer. 
she knocks again.
nothing.
vi waits another second, leaning her shoulder against the door.
“it’s me, wonder woman,” she tries. 
hope flutters in her chest as she hears you shuffle, unchain the lock. vi stumbles as you throw the door open, but she recovers quickly to find you: smudged black eyeliner enhancing the shadows underneath your eyes, hair in disarray, clothes disheveled. 
“i’m not really in the mood for sex.”
vi can’t help but laugh, even though your comment feels like a punch to the face.
“wow. figured you would think more of me by now than just some horny teenage boy.”
“look, vi —”
vi? 
since when do you call her that?
“i’m sorry i missed the meeting today. i texted mel —”
damn, so your phone does work. 
you’ve just been ignoring her calls and texts.
“but i’m just… it’s not a good time, okay? i’ll see you around.”
ah. 
the classic generic excuse and non-committal statement combo.
you start to close the door on her before she even has a chance to get a word in.
the hits just keep coming. 
thankfully, vi’s always been a good fighter.
“wait.” vi places her palm firmly on the door before you can fully shut her out. “i’m just here to check on you.” 
your face remains unchanged.
“okay, well, you’ve checked on me.” 
“yeah, i’ve checked on you. you look like shit.”
you glare at her. “well i’m sorry i didn’t have the time to get all prettied up for you. i know that you like me better that way.”
“that’s not what i  —”  vi inhales sharply. she’s a fighter, but she doesn’t want to fight you. “mel dropped the news — about admin officially cutting our funding. i knew how that would affect you, so….” vi lifts the bag of takeout. “i brought some thai food for us to share. a pomegranate, too, because i know you like seasonal fruit. it’s been a while and honestly, i just….i just wanted to spend time with you.”
you exhale, your eyes softening. 
there. 
a hesitant smile, an invitation to come inside.
there are clothes all over your floor and dishes piled high in the sink. your desk is littered with empty boxes of cereal and cans of an energy drink that normally you’d never touch. the blanket that sky had crocheted for you — lavender and pink checkered — is unfolded on your couch, your laptop half-closed on the coffee table in front next to two stacks of printed essays — ones marked with purple pen, the others untouched. in contrast, your bed is still perfectly made. 
you take the blanket and wrap it around your shoulders, sitting at the kitchen table and curling into yourself. vi busies herself in cracking open the pomegranate, putting the seeds into the last clean bowl in your cupboard. the palms of her arm wraps are now stained a reddish-purple, but she doesn’t care.
vi manages to find two pairs of clean chopsticks for the thai food, and the two of you eat in silence. 
“so….” vi starts, watching you stab a piece of chicken before popping it into your mouth. “you wanna talk about it, or….?”
“what’s there to talk about?”
“well, for starters, maybe tell me what’s been getting you into full hibernation mode? we haven’t seen each other in, like, a week.”
“six days,” you correct, chewing a mouthful of noodles. “last tuesday, we played pool during my closing shift at sappho’s. i lost. you made me down two shots of tequila because you’re a menace and you know i hate it.” 
“yeah, but i drove you home and tucked you into bed with water and advil for later, so i’m also a gentleman. so, just tell me what’s been going on. we’ll figure it out, yeah?”
“it’s fine,” you grumble.
“clearly, it’s not. just tell me what you need.”
“what i need is to not be distracted,” you huff, avoiding eye contact. “i certainly don’t need you —”
“taking care of you, i know.” vi grabs your hand from across the table. she feels you stiffen on instinct, and then ease into the heat of her skin. “trust me, i wouldn’t be here if i didn’t want to be. so — humor me.”
vi squeezes your hand, hoping to reassure you. 
you sigh. “i’ve just — i’ve been spiralling trying to figure out how the centre can keep going with, like, half our required budget, trying to see if we can get some external donors and i still need to finalize the venue and equipment rentals for our last open mic….and….and my sibling called again to tell me that things haven’t been great at home, so i want to go down there this weekend to sort everything out, but my car hasn’t been starting….plus i’m behind on grading, and i told my supervisor i’d have a complete draft ready by thursday and i’m not even halfway done, and that’s the same day we’re having that art build for the climate rally on friday, and i’ve been having the worst cramps since this afternoon, and all i wanna do is pass out and sink into my duvet, but i need to keep going —”
vi squeezes your hand again, this time more firmly. “you need to slow down.” 
“i can’t.” you huff. “i have to keep everything from falling apart, and if i don’t….”
vi shifts to the chair next to yours, still holding your hand. 
“but you can’t do it all if you’re too exhausted to take care of yourself. from the looks of it, you’ve been living off of frosted flakes, red bull, and zero sleep.” 
you shrug. “if that’s what it takes.”
“if that’s what it takes, then maybe it’s not worth it.”
“don’t say that,” you tell her. “it’s all worth it. i just wish it wasn’t so…heavy.”
vi nods, because she really, truly understands. she gives you the advice she can see you giving her in another context.
“you ever think that maybe it wouldn’t feel as heavy if you…i don’t know…weren’t too stubborn to ask for help.”
“there are things that are my responsibility, violet,” you tell her, slipping your hand away. you reach for the bowl of pomegranate seeds, meticulously picking up one at a time with your chopsticks and crushing it in between your molars. “i can’t just pass those off to someone else.” 
“fine. but what about other things? like the women’s centre stuff — we’re a team, right? so we’ll figure it out together, divide the labor so you’re not doing everything. and, maybe ask your supervisor for an extension, too? and, well, i don’t really need my car this weekend, so you’re welcome to borrow it.”
you pause, narrowing your eyes at her. 
“you said…. ‘we.’”
“well, yeah. i’m part of the team, aren’t i?”
“but you’ll be finished with your hours in a week. there’s no reason for you to stay.”
“of course there is,” vi whispers, studying your face as it morphs from suspicious to something else, something gentler. 
her heart is pounding as she waits for you to say something, so vi starts to dig into the pomegranate seeds, the juice surprisingly more sweet than sour. some dribbles out from the corner of her lips, and you reach over to wipe it away with your thumb.
“i’d love for you to stay,” you hum, smiling, and vi feels her chest glow with a brightness it seems only you can bring out. “turns out you give pretty good advice.”
“so…you’ll consider it.”
you shrug again. “maybe. i am very tempted to take you up on the car thing.”
“all yours, if you want it.”
“are you sure?”
“it’s fine, wonder woman. i’ll just carpool to practice — it’s better for the environment, anyways. can’t show up to the climate rally as a hypocrite, can i?” she jokes, and you roll your eyes playfully. “and, i’ll try to fix your car while you’re away.”
“wow. you are a gentleman.”
“gentleman? baby, i’m husband material.”
you actually laugh.
“i thought we were over gender norms,” you quip. “but yeah. you are.” 
vi’s cheeks heat up at your statement. you most definitely notice her blushing because you break out into a toothy grin
“i missed you, v,” you admit. “any other words of wisdom?”
despite your tender smile, you look exhausted. vi just wants to hold you through it all, tell you it’s gonna be okay. instead, she settles for placing a gentle hand on your cheek, running her thumb over the deep shadow underneath your eye. 
“get some rest, pretty girl.”
a few hours later, you wake up alone. 
you have a vague memory of warm arms wrapped around you, a heart beating steadier than yours. your sheets smell like old spice, your apartment smells like fresh laundry. you get out of bed and notice that there are no more dishes in your sink, no more cans or containers on any surface. all the clothes you’d been meaning to wash are now carefully folded on your couch. 
there’s a bright pink sticky note on your nightstand next to the keys to vi’s car.
you talk in your sleep. something about stargazing? maybe we can go when you get back. 
drive safe. text me if you need anything.
xxx
- v
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
zaun yellowjackets vs. piltover knights. 
two minutes left in overtime. 
one goal standing in the way of their trophy. one goal to end piltover’s monopoly over the title of national champions. 
caitlyn probably told her knights to be extra aggressive — win by any means necessary — so it’s been a long game of dirty plays and intentional fouls.
vi always puts her heart into every single game, but this time —
this time, it’s personal. 
zaun’s defense works to regain possession and prevent piltover’s attack. ashe manages to intercept a pass between two knights, and is quick in dribbling the ball until mid-field. she sends it over to vi with a swift kick. vi’s quick on her feet, catching piltover’s defense by surprise, sprinting closer and closer to the goal. she makes it to the penalty box.
this could be the winning point. 
vi has it, too. she’s so fucking close, about to fake out the goalie and kick into that hard-to-defend sweet spot — until a sharp, pointy elbow collides with her ribs so abruptly, it knocks the wind out of her lungs. she stumbles forward over the ball, knees skidding onto the grass. whoever it is also steps on vi’s cleat for good measure. 
“fuck!” she looks up to see who it is.
of course. it’s maddie fucking nolan, who doesn’t spare so much as a glance as the ref doles out a red card. she nods at caitlyn as she walks off the field, no doubt following her captain’s orders.
her teammates help vi to her feet, and the ref makes sure everyone is in position for the penalty kick.
this could be the winning point. vi just has to ignore caitlyn’s icy stare from a few feet away, and the heart threatening to beat out of her chest. 
vi takes a deep breath. 
she looks to the stands. among the crowd of screaming fans, zaunites and pilties alike, is vi’s family. they’re cheering.
you’re there too, sitting next to them. 
everyone is staring at vi, waiting for the whistle, waiting for her to make the shot, but the only person she stares back at is you.
you’ve got this, v, you had whispered to her the night before. she couldn’t sleep, so she called you. vi wishes she was back there, now — tangled in flannel sheets, lucky snoring at the foot of the bed, gazing up at the glow-in-the-dark stars stuck to her ceiling until she finally fell asleep in your arms.
but, vi’s on the field. 
and this is the winning point. 
the whistle blows. 
she makes the shot.
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
“i told you i wasn’t a jinx!” powder sticks her tongue out at mylo.
she’s all sweat and dirt and adrenaline, but, fuck, if vi isn’t so, incredibly happy and proud of her team, of everything they’ve been through, everything they’ve accomplished.
it almost doesn’t feel real.
just like it doesn’t feel real, seeing you talk animatedly with her sister’s boyfriend, laughing along with her siblings, smiling as you watch her dads hug and praise her.
when it’s your turn to do the same, you practically leap into vi’s arms, gushing about how amazing she was, how proud you are of her. 
“this looks good on you,” vi hums, as you pull away from another hug. her fingers play with the bottom of the jersey, and she bites the inside of her cheek to ground herself in the moment. you, with her family. you, in her jersey. “thinking of joining the yellowjackets?”
“i think i’ll leave the soccer to you,” you tell her. “you were amazing out there. guess i should be calling you wonder woman from now on, huh?”
“wonder woman! that’s where i remember you from!” vander suddenly exclaims, stepping closer to the pair of you. silco turns around, too. “you once tried to get into the last drop with a fake id, didn’t you? under the name diana prince?”
“shit,” you laugh nervously, eyes flickering between vander and the ground as if you’re once again a teenager caught in the act. “i….probably did.”
“i kicked you out, told you to go home to themyscira.”
“yeah…i….i remember that.” you nod slowly, furrowing your brows. “except, i didn’t want to go home that night, so i lingered outside,” you continue. you turn to vi, and your face softens. “which was when you —”
“brought two glasses of cherry coke and rum,” vi finishes; she sees flashes of that night as you gaze into her eyes. “we climbed onto the roof and —”
that was her first kiss. vi never even realized until now, but —
you were her first kiss.
“i can’t believe i forgot that.”
“weird, how memory works,” you agree, tilting your head curiously, looking at vi with a newfound interest, like a ghost from your past.
“well, isn’t this a story we’ll be sharing on your wedding day!” vander chuckles, ruffling vi’s hair. 
“don’t pressure them, darling,” silco chides, but the smirk growing on his face gives him away. he’s loving this drama. “they’re barely 23 — i doubt they’ve discussed marriage.” 
“oh, we’re not —”
“yeah, we’re just —”
“friends,” you say at the same time, careful to avoid eye contact.
vi feels like she might burst into flames at the knowing look vander and silco share.
“well, violet, would your friend like to join us for a celebratory dinner?” silco asks.
so that’s how you’re sitting between powder and claggor, listening to them talk your ear off about the young innovator’s competition. vi’s sitting across from you, next to ekko, who occasionally pipes in. 
you’re here, sharing the tradition of a post-game meal with vi’s family at the local pizza parlour. 
caitlyn never even wanted to meet vi’s family.
a few pizzas are ordered for the table, and you eat and laugh and sip your soda along with everyone else. you make a flower out of your paper napkin and hand it to isha, who’s on the other side of powder, and she gives you a toothy grin in return. you answer all the standard questions about your job and major and plans for the future.
“after graduation, i’m probably gonna take a break, get some work experience,” you explain. “maybe save up some money for law school a few years down the road.”
“you wanna be a lawyer, huh? you sure you wanna be friends with a felon, then?” powder asks, blowing bubbles into her soda through her straw. 
vi coughs, choking on a mushroom. 
“powder!” 
“what! she never told you?”
you shake your head, glancing over at vi who suddenly finds it hard to look you in the eye. your foot has been pressed against hers underneath the table all night; you pull it away now. she takes a big gulp of water; vi looks over at vander and silco for help, but they seem to be caught up in their own conversation.
“oh, damn! ” mylo adds, leaning over. “it’s a great story!” 
“guys, maybe don’t —”
“but it’s a great story!” mylo insists. “shows what a badass you are!”
“she didn’t do anything serious, like murder or anything,” powder clarifies. “it was really just her pissing off some enforcers —”
“rightfully so,” ekko adds. 
claggor nods. “we were just kids. they were harassing us for some bullshit, disruption of property or whatever, so vi steps in and things get heated —”
“it takes three of enforcers to get her handcuffed, but she manages to get a few nasty hits in before they send her off to stillwater —”
“she spends three days there —”
“i thought it was two —”
“no, it was three —”
“needless to say, this isn’t the first time vi has been sentenced to community service, but it seems she’s really enjoying it this time, thanks to you,” powder finishes, winking at you. 
“well that’s….quite the story,” you finally say, voice steady. 
“oh! let’s tell her about the time she stole from some enforcers that were hoarding food —”
as powder continues the story, and you listen intently, it’s hard to read your expression.
are you ashamed of being friends with her? disgusted by her family, her past? regretful that you ever let her touch you, let her into your life? 
vi’s stomach turns when your eyes collide; she’s been down this road before, and vi’s scared that she knows exactly what you’re thinking.
she pushes her chair back and disappears to the bathroom before she has to watch you walk away.
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
there’s a knock on the door.
“someone’s in here,” vi says. she grips the edge of the counter so hard, her knuckles turn white. 
deep breaths. 
this isn’t the same as before.
this isn’t caitlyn, who threw vi out like a piece of trash when something better came along. 
then again, you never knew this much about vi’s past. you’re well within your right to —
there’s another knock.
“v? it’s me….i have to get going, but i wanted to check on you before i leave.”
“okay,” vi clips. she looks up at herself in the mirror; she had splashed her face with cold water to calm herself down. a drop falls from her chin. “bye.”
“are you sure you’re okay?”
“i’m fine. see you around.”
you sigh, and vi hears you settle against the doorframe. 
“violet, let me in,” you press. “please?” 
“i’m fine. you can leave.”
“okay, well, i’m not leaving until i see that gorgeous face of yours one more time,” you whisper. “i got all dolled up just for you, and all i wanna do is give you a proper goodbye….” 
well, when you put it like that….
vi grabs some paper towel to dry her face and fixes her hair before opening the door for you. you smile knowingly, enter and lock the door behind you. 
you lean against the door as vi leans against the counter, the marble digging into her lower back.
“okay, i’ll start because, frankly, i don’t have time to waste,” you state after a few moments of silence. “nothing i’ve learned about you tonight has changed how i see you. it’s just confirmed some things.”
“right. like how impulsive and violent and reckless i’ve always been,” she lists glumly, unable to look you in the eye.
“maybe you are all those things,” you pause. “but, i don’t fucking care. i mean, i do, because it’s part of you and i like who you are. i like you.”
your words do wonders to ease the tension throughout vi’s body, and she feels like she can actually take a breath.
vi’s eyes lock onto yours.
“you do?”
“i like who you are, every part of it,” you tell her. “well, i don’t like that you’ve had to fight your way through an unbelievably fucked up system ever since you were a kid, but the bottom line is that you’re the strongest, most compassionate person i know.”
vi blinks at you.
“funny, i was just thinking the same thing about you the other day.”
neither of you say anything for a minute or so, letting the sentiment linger in the small space between you. once more, you’re the one to break the ice.
“well, you know what they say about great minds….” you step closer to vi. you take her chin between your thumb and your index finger. "can you guess what i’m thinking now?" 
vi shakes her head, throat suddenly very dry.
“i’m thinking that i’ve wanted to kiss you all night.”
“what’s stopped you?”
you grin. “i didn’t want to make a fuss in front of your family, but now that we’re alone….”
vi doesn't say anything, but instead closes the gap between your lips.
you kiss her, harsh and messy, tongue and teeth, swallowing her moans as your fingers snake down the waistband of her pants. you pull vi’s bottom lip with your teeth before moving to her neck, nipping along the outline of her tattoo. you bite down harder on her skin, right at her pulse point. 
"what’s that you said earlier —” a low groan tumbles from vi’s lips when you start to suck just above her collarbones. another when your tongue soothes over the sting. “about a proper goodbye…?” she tugs your hair so that you’re looking right at her. 
it’s quite the sight — your lips swollen, chest heaving, eyes curious and lustful.
“anything you want,” you whisper, all breathless. 
vi hums. she slips a hand underneath the frayed hem of your denim skirt, and you gasp as her nails scrape against your inner thigh.
she likes that you’re here. here for her.
"get on your knees for me, sweetheart.”
she pulls down her pants along with her briefs, as you kneel before her without hesitation.
you drape one of her legs over your shoulder, giving your tongue better access to her cunt. vi grips your hair tighter, bringing you in closer, and you moan, sending vibrations up her body.
"fuck," vi hisses. you add a finger, while your tongue works her clit. 
you bring her to the edge, stay with her even as her thighs clench around your skull. she expects you to get back on your feet right away, but you stay, adding another finger and sucking her clit. she moans your name.
you pull away slightly. "one more, pretty girl," you promise. your chin glistens with vi’s release; you lick your lips as you gaze up at her through thick eyelashes. "can you do that for me?" she nods furiously, and you get back to work.
after letting her ride your tongue and fingers through another orgasm, you kiss her ankle before releasing her leg. vi pulls you up to your feet, sucks the taste of herself off your tongue.
you pull away slightly, heart racing against vi’s chest. 
vi swipes her thumb over the smudged lipstick below your lip. she studies you, admires you, like you’re a fucking work of art that belongs in a gallery, like you didn’t just fucked her through two consecutive orgasms in the bathroom at a pizza parlour while wham's "last christmas" plays through shitty speakers.
"take these off." vi tugs at your tights. you do as instructed, slipping off your underwear as well. she pulls you towards her, and lodges a leg in between yours. your bare cunt brushes against her thigh, back and forth as she guides your hips. "i can't believe you got all dressed up…. wearing my jersey, and this pretty little skirt even though it’s so cold outside. all for me?"
vi flexes her thigh muscles, pushing you down faster and harder. you whimper.
"all – all for you.”
vi feels her pussy clench, with the desperation in your voice, the stickiness of your heat against her skin, the smell of the two of you intertwining. your orgasm crashes into you, and vi holds you through it. 
you kiss her ever so sweetly before removing yourself from her grasp, smoothing down your skirt and looking around for your underwear.
"where are my...." 
you look over as vi tucks your fuschia thong into the inner pocket of her jacket.
"i'm guessing you'll buy me replacements for christmas."
vi flashes you a shit eating grin before putting on her own underwear. she then pulls up her pants, not wiping your release from her thigh. she likes the idea of walking around with you seeped into her skin. 
when vi looks over at you, you’re as fully dressed as you can be and busy checking something on your phone. she only sees a flash of your lock screen, but it’s her. a photo of her and lucky playing at the park; there’s snow, so it had to have been a few days ago. 
that doesn’t mean anything, right? people use photos of their friends for their wallpaper all the time.
“i really have to go,” you sigh. you pull a tube of lipstick from your pocket and step closer to the mirror. “hey — do you think we could switch shirts? not sure i should wear this to my next dinner.”
vi nods and you remove her jersey, revealing a matching fuschia bralette. she wonders what’s got you all coordinated — who else you’ve clearly dressed up for. 
“so, you’ve got a hot date?” vi tries to act casual as she takes off her jacket, pulls off her shirt, and waits for you to answer. you take your time, fixing yourself in the mirror.
“something like that,” you finally say with a shy smile.
later, when isha’s asleep on powder’s lap in the backseat, vi thinks about how your date might have gone, if you’re taking them home to the same bed vi has fucked you in throughout these past few months.
where do you get off, fucking vi in the bathroom during dinner while her parents are at the table, only to leave for another date, wearing vi’s shirt, too?
“hey, can i ask you something?” ekko asks from beside her, cutting off the angry monologue in her head.
vi reaches over to turn down the music.
“sure, little man. what’s up?”
“what’s the deal between you and wonder woman?”
vi clears her throat, gripping the steering wheel. “what makes you think there’s a deal?”
“oh, please, we all noticed that hickey on your neck after she visited you in the bathroom.” 
the car crawls to a stop as the light turns red, and vi adjusts the collar of her shirt.
“we’re just friends.”
“well, powder and i were just friends for ages,” ekko points out.
vi doesn’t notice that the light’s turned green until someone behind her honks. she steps on the gas, but the idiot behind her still cuts in front of her.
“asshole,” she grumbles, throwing them a middle finger for good measure. vi glances to her right at ekko, who’s scribbling something in his sketchbook despite only the streetlamps outside providing light. “so, what made you….realize that you wanted something more?”
ekko closes his book, smiling to himself. 
“honestly? it was kinda a million little things, but what it really comes down to is that she’s the only person i could spend every second of my life with, and i’d still want more time. and, in my experience….it’s better to tell someone how you feel sooner rather than later.”
“or, some people prefer to wait a few weeks,” powder mumbles, stirring awake. “nice try, mister, but no interfering. i’m not losing 20 bucks.”
“wait — you’ve bet on my love life?”
ekko smirks. “so it is love.”
vi shrugs, pretends that she doesn’t immediately picture you in your kitchen, making her banana pancakes at 2am when she hears the word love. 
“it doesn’t matter.”
because, it really doesn’t matter. 
you’re out with someone else right now. 
it’s over before it really had a chance to begin.
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
cupcake 
Hey, Vi
Just wanted to say good game today
You played brilliantly
Violet
k
cupcake
No need for the attitude
I was just trying to be nice
Violet
my apologies!!!
thank you SO much for recognizing my talent captain kiramman
i feel like i’m actually worth something now!!!
cupcake
Bitterness isn’t a good colour on you, darling
Violet
im NOT your darling
cupcake
I’m aware
I saw you earlier with that girl
Are you together? 
Violet
idk
are you still with maddie?
cupcake
Actually, we broke up
I was hoping you and I could chat
Violet
what’s in it for me?
cupcake
The chance to reconnect with an old friend
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
you can excuse vi no longer attending the weekly team meeting. she finished her 100 hours around thanksgiving, so technically she didn’t need to be there anymore.
maybe you could excuse her ignoring your calls, or leaving your texts on read. it’s finals season, and she did mention picking up a few extra shifts to save up for christmas presents. 
but you simply can’t excuse vi walking into sappho’s with caitlyn fucking kiramman, ordering drinks from you like you’re absolute strangers.
“what the fuck, vi?” you seethe. 
vi glances at her date. caitlyn’s waiting for her back at a table, the glow of her phone screen illuminating her pretty face.
“what, should i have ordered something else? not every girl likes cherry coke and rum.” 
you glare at her from across the counter, but start preparing their drinks nonetheless. 
“why are you with her?” you throw some ice in a glass, the cubes clinking aggressively against the crystal. “are you back together?”
vi has the audacity to roll her eyes at you. “why’d you care?”
you catch yourself before saying something you’ll regret, something about liking her more than you definitely should considering the agreement the two of you had made. 
clearly, vi doesn’t feel the same way; it’s not worth spilling your guts to her at your place of work. 
“because we’re friends.”
“yeah, right,” vi scoffs. “you’re jealous, which you have no right to be because you’re seeing someone, too.”
you accidentally pour a double shot of vodka. you don’t really care, and mix the drink anyways.
“what the fuck are you talking about?” 
“i’m talking about the date you went on the night of my championship game.”
“what date?” you slam the glasses in front of vi, so hard that you’re lucky they didn’t break.
“oh, don’t play dumb.” vi spits your name like it’s poison. “this whole thing started because you said you didn’t want a relationship, when really you just didn’t want a relationship with me. you used me until someone better came along. you lied to me.”
her eyes are glazed over, her voice shaking ever so slightly. you’re not sure if you’re more hurt or angry by what she’s saying, but it cuts deep; you continue as though you aren’t bleeding out in front of her.
“i don’t want a relationship with anyone and certainly not with you —”
“excuse me! are we able to order something?” someone with bright green hair and a septum piercing waves their hand in front of your face.
“yeah, just give us a second —”
“look, you and your girlfriend can fight on your own time.”
“she’s not my girlfriend!” you and vi snap simultaneously. 
you glare at each other.
vi grabs the glasses from the counter, and walks away.
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
it took many brainstorming sessions, many boring conversations with potential donors, and many, many tears, but you managed to secure enough funding to keep the women’s centre going for the foreseeable future.  
it was a team effort, of course, so you just want everyone to enjoy this open mic night, the last event of the semester — even though you are weighed down by the absence of a certain someone.
the gallery space on campus that you rented out is both cozy and electric, decorated with fairy lights on the walls, with pillows and blankets on the floor for people to sit and watch performances. there’s a table with drinks and snacks, a corner for people to make art if they’re inspired. 
you’re rearranging the food, watching gert perform an original song when mel slides in next to you, wearing a gorgeous white dress with gold accents. 
“do you mind running to the office? we’re out of paint.”
“really? people don’t usually use the paint.”
“well, it seems to be quite popular tonight.”
“it’s fine. we still have lots of other stuff. they can just collage or something.”
mel shakes her head. “i really think you should go get more paint.”
“maybe ask sky? i should stay here —”
“you could use a break, too,” mel cuts you off, placing a hand on your shoulder. “you’ve been nonstop all day; the rest of us can hold down the fort for a little while.”
you concede, mostly because she’s right and you don’t have the energy to argue. 
when you get to the office, you’re surprised to find the lights on. even more surprised that someone’s already there, sitting on the zebra-striped couch.
“vi?”
she jumps slightly when you say her name.
“mel texted me,” she rushes out like she’s been caught red-handed. “said she needed help with something she’d been planning.” 
you frown, until you realize why mel must have sent you here, specifically. 
you haven’t seen vi since that night at sappho’s; you’d been quite a mess after your shift, ranting to mel on the phone about how she’d been right and you should have been more careful, how you don’t know what you did that ruined whatever you and vi had, and you really don’t know what you can do to fix it.
you’re both too stubborn to reach out to the other, so it seems like mel decided to take matters into her own hands. 
“yeah, i doubt she’s coming,” you tell vi. 
“okay,” vi says, but she doesn’t move. “i, uh, i was hoping i’d run into you, though.”
“yeah?” you raise an eyebrow at vi, crossing your arms. “needed another vodka martini for your piltover princess.”
“she’s not — we’re not together.”
“oh,” you exhale. the animosity you were holding towards her evaporates, but doesn’t completely disappear. you watch her, watching you stand by the doorway. 
there are so many things you want to tell her, but you don’t even know where to start. you know that you’ve hurt her. she hurt you, too.
but, also:
you miss the cloudy blue-gray of her eyes, the scar on her upper lip. 
you miss her.
“do you wanna come sit?”
after being so far away from vi, for what feels like forever, you don’t hesitate to take her up on the offer. your knees brush together as you settle next to her on the couch, a jolt of electricity passing through your body at the contact.
“so, i admit that —”
“vi, you were right —”
both of you stop your sentences short, chuckling nervously. you each urge the other to continue, and only get caught in a similar mess:
“i fucked up,” vi blurts out.
“i lied to you,” you confess at the same time.
an awkward, unfamiliar silence hangs above you; you’re not sure what to do next. 
vi takes the leap. she tells you that mel explained everything: that you had to attend a dinner with alumni and potential donors on the same night of her championship game, but you kept it from vi since it was already a big moment for her; that you haven’t been on a real date with anyone else since september. vi apologizes for jumping to conclusions and falling back into caitlyn’s arms, shutting you out when she should have just talked to you.
you’re the girl who was her first kiss, she says. the girl who lingered in a vague memory, appeared in the fiction of her daydreams, and then suddenly became too real. 
“i like you. i really fucking like you. and if it has to be as a friend, that’s fine because i don’t want to lose you.” vi takes a shattered breath, blinking back tears. she fiddles with the ring on her index finger, anxiously bouncing her knee. you place your hand there to steady her, and she exhales. “i guess i’m just not sure….when you said you liked me that night at the restaurant….is that what you lied about?” 
vi’s practically doe-eyed, waiting for you to respond. 
you shake your head. 
“i lied when i said that i didn’t want a relationship with you,” you admit, and the hint of a smile dances across her lips. “i had this major crush on you, you know? every time you came into sappho’s….i couldn’t help it. and then you showed up here and we became friends, and then we started….well, you know the rest.”
“duh. i was there,” vi jokes, easing into her usual, playful self.  
“i can’t do the whole casual thing,” you continue, rubbing circles into her knee with your thumb. “i know we made a promise, but i just can’t, not with you. it’s like…in every other relationship i’ve been in, i was trying to run out the clock. with you, though, with us, i feel like there’s never enough time —”
vi grabs your neck and crashes her mouth onto yours before you can finish your sentence. 
you’ve kissed each other many times, in many different places, in many different ways, but never like this: like you’re both willing to break one promise if it means forging a new one.
“will you be my girlfriend, violet rose atlas?” you whisper as you pull away, lips brushing against hers.  
you start to count the freckles on her cheeks as she beams at you, pulls you into her lap.
“i thought you’d never ask.”
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yandere-writer-momo · 3 days ago
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Thinking about a yandere werewolf, but not just any werewolf… a bounty hunter. And he has it bad for his you. Cowboy Werewolf!
Yandere Shorts: Like I Love You
Yandere werewolf x fem reader
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TW: obsession, delusional themes, abo dynamic, horror, gore (mentioned), death of characters, neglectful husband, betrayal, cheating husband, forced relationship, mention of baby trapping, and behavior that should not be romanticized
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Rolfe was currently on a hunt… his target is a sickly preacher’s, one that should be easy enough. Her own husband had paid him quite the pretty penny to off her. Poor little lamb didn’t stand a chance in the wilderness of this world. Not when she had enemies close to her side such as an unfaithful husband and a conniving best friend. He almost felt sorry for his prey
He arrived a day later, his clawed fingers dragged through a lock of her hair as he inhaled her scent. She smelled… delicious. And she was so vulnerable too with her nape out that just begged for his teeth to be driven into…
Rolfe shook his head before he went back into a trance when she subconsciously leaned into his touch. His hand moved up and grazed her temple that felt as if it were ablaze. Poor woman had a fever…
“Darling? Did you finally come to me?” Her voice was a bit delirious with sickness as she kissed his hands. Each kiss made him feel as if he was her beloved. It took everything in him not to loudly whine like a dog. “I missed you so much James. I’m sorry I got sick again.”
Rolfe didn’t say a word before he continued to drag his rough palms through her hair. His heart hammered in his chest and his wolf clawed inside his brain to be released. It seemed this woman before him… was his fated mate.”
Rolfe bent down and buried his nose into the crook of her neck to deeply inhaled. Oh yes… this lassy was his for the takin.
Rolfe began to slowly nurse her back to health rather than off her. An action that made his employer question him. Why on earth would a monster nurse such a nuisance back to health? She was always near death’s door. What use was such a delicate woman in the Wild West?
“When are you going to off (your name)? She’s an easy target.”
“I have honor as a bounty hunter. It must be a hunt.” Rolfe snarled at (your name)’s husband, James, the man who dared to keep her sick due to his lack of care. Had that scrawny man have no pride as a man? The pastor made him sick.
“She’s easy to pick off right now. I’d really like this to be over and done with so I can marry Helen. This is why I hired a monster-“ Rolfe picked James up from the ground by his throat as James gasped for air.
“You are a foolish, greedy man. Are you sure you are truly a man of god?” Rolfe growled, showing his fangs. His dark, muscular form largely towered over James’s lithe frame. “You’re a pathetic man.”
Rolfe soon went back to the care of (your name). The werewolf rubbed his cheeks all over her bed and her body to scent her… he needed to get rid of James’s scent. Rolfe wouldn’t let another have her and hurt her again… he’d spirit her away.
Rolfe wondered how many pups she’d want. If they’d be pretty like her but strong like him… if she’d pepper him with nips and kisses everyday. If she’d beg him for his knot on the next full moon as he properly mated her?
“Darling?” (Your name) reached for his face and Rolfe was quick to put his face in them. A needy whine escaped his throat while he nuzzled her. She was his precious mate…
He snarled when he saw Helen enter. The woman scoffed at him in disgust.
“Ugh. James and I are tired of waiting. You have been here over a month! We want you gone beast. We’ll do it ourselves.”
“So you’re cancelling the contract?” He hummed while he continued to tenderly kiss (your name)‘a palms. “Are you sure? Did you read the fine print?”
“Yes. We don’t need your kind here, true love will prevail-“ Helen didn’t even have time to scream before a giant black wolf hybrid had dug it’s fangs into her throat and ripped it apart like wrapping paper. Blood splattered all over the floor and walls as Helen could only helplessly choke on her own blood.
“Yes… true love will prevail.” He muttered with a a satisfied hum. “My mate will be so happy.”
Meanwhile, James fled into the forest for dear life. That beast had gotten Helen! The two of them couldn’t believe the werewolf would turn on him.
James loudly leapt when he heard something large chase him through the underbrush on all fours. He could hear his heartbeat in his ears and feel his sweat pool down his back in puddles. He needed to get to the church! A demon such as the bounty hunter couldn’t possibly enter there-
But James was knocked to the ground as an agonized shriek fell from his lips. The werewolf began to shake and mangle his leg like the bloodthirsty beast it was…
“Let me go! Let me go! I didn’t do anything-“
Rolfe chuckled darkly. The black werewolf dropped his legs and glanced his beastly head at James. “Oh but she never did anything either… all she did was foolishly love you.”
“W-what do you mean? Are you talking about-“ James’s words were muffled by the paw like hand that covered his mouth. Rolfe shushed him.
“Shhh. You may have failed to pay me and cancel my contract but I had gotten something far more valuable from this transaction. Something most werewolves dream to find in their lifetimes… a fated mate!” Rolfe sighed dreamily. “You may have failed as a protector and provider, but I surely won’t! You have given me something more valuable than any coin could offer… yet you were neglectful to her. Such a shame really.”
“I… I’ll do anything! Just take her and let me live.”
“Ah but I can’t do that. Not when she still calls for you at night. No… you have to be eliminated. Destroyed, really. You can no longer exist on the same planet as her! You are in the way of my love!”
Loud screams of terror ringed out throughout the crisp night air and then it was silence.
Rolfe returned hours later scrubbed clean of blood while he crawled into the bed with his darling mate. He sighed in contentment when she cuddled him. Yes… it may take time to train her properly, but he was sure he could do it. He could make her love him. Just like he loved her.
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alchemistc · 3 days ago
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Part One
The loft is sadly undecorated. He'd tried, is the thing. Gone to the same novelty store they'd found on a random walk after a date, in late September, where Tommy had spent twenty minutes worrying a foam pumpkin in his hands while Buck tried to decide what sort of decor would fit his utilitarian loft.
They'd spent so long lingering over the sculpted white candles, Buck thrilled because Tommy's straight face broke every time Buck pointed out which ones looked like incredibly expensive dildos, that he'd felt bad enough to buy a whole set of them just to appease the girl at the counter who'd been watching them with a half annoyed, half wistful expression while Buck made a comment about dragons that had had Tommy biting his lip so hard he'd actually gone red in the face trying to hold the laughter in.
But every time he'd picked up a glass tree and thought how much fun it'd be to try to make Tommy go full Tik Tok Paramedic on him, every time he'd found something soft or plush enough that Tommy wouldn't have been able to resist running his fingers over it, plucking it up to toss it between his palms - well.
It wasn't like there'd be anyone in his loft long enough to really appreciate his decorations.
"Why'd you kiss me?" he asks, rounding on Tommy as Tommy takes a tentative step towards the kitchen.
"You were being annoying." At Buck's look, he elaborates. "Force of habit."
The finger comes up without any input from Buck, his voice tipping into that same flirty, bickering rapport he'd always pushed as far as he could. "I knew you did it to shut me up."
Tommy expression shutters. He recognizes Buck's tone. A few months ago that tone would start with a round of banter that usually ended with at least one of them with their pants around their ankles.
He looks spooked. He's staring at the island stool closest to the door like he's replaying the last conversation they had here, and Buck feels all his ire rear back up.
"You promised me clarity, Tommy." It's an accusation, and they both know it, because he looks ready to fucking bolt.
Slowly, he steps in. Half a yard closer to Buck, close enough to curl his hand over the island, and Buck is struck again by how goddamn unfair it is that Tommy looks this goddamn good in a suit.
"I did."
Buck's pretty sure he has some muffins he hasn't frozen yet that wouldn't actually damage Tommy, if he threw them at him.
"Can we...?" He gestures, vague as his half a question, and Buck wants to throttle him. Or kiss him again, which is -
"I need a beer. You?"
Tommy sighs. His grip on the corner of the island makes his knuckles go white. "Evan."
"No beer, got it." He swings the door open and doesn't wait for the reaction to either his snippy little rejoinder or the stacks and stacks of baked goods filling up the shelves of his fridge. He pops the cap with his back still turned, let's the fridge door fall closed. "Not like you drove here, but sure. One of us should be sober, I guess."
The switch back to Evan doesn't do anything for him at all.
Buck leans back against the counter and tries not to think about how he'd had this half formed idea of getting a real tree this year, finding some novelty kiosk that made those hokey ornaments for people to mark the years they'd been a family. He'd thought -
Tommy blinks guiltily when Buck catches him eyeing the way he fills out his slacks, a toe to groin drift of his gaze that makes Buck ache for when he could respond to that by dropping to his knees.
"That's a lot of bread," Tommy notes, eyes focused somewhere over Buck's shoulder.
"Why'd you break up with me, Tommy?"
Tommy freezes. Shifts from foot to foot. Sighs, and takes a few steps to the fridge, swings it open to grab a beer of his own. It's still the stuff Tommy likes. Buck's not picky, really, and it'd been habit to grab the six pack he always kept for Tommy.
The last five times he'd restocked.
Tommy takes half a step back to lean against the island, just off center from Buck, so they both have to twist their necks just a little to actually look at each other.
"You terrify me," Tommy murmurs, a few swigs in, when the silence is just starting to make Buck's skin itch. "Evan, I'm not -." He grimaces, frustrated. "I'm not some Super Gay who fights for justice and equality and the ability to make horrible television with Hummel doll sopranists."
"I don't know what that means."
Tommy's smile is wry. He'd had a running list of movies Buck's never seen on a note on his phone - every time Buck missed a reference, he'd added it to the list. They'd gotten through maybe twenty before -
"I led on a good woman for years because I convinced myself I could live my life ignoring a huge piece of myself. I hurled slurs with my buddies just to make sure no one noticed me. I fed into every toxic stereotype I could just to avoid anyone realizing I wasn't one of them. I'm not - I'm not some Gold Star Gay, paragon of the community. I didn't do shit. And even when I made the decision to let myself just be who I always was, I waited until no one in my life was close enough to me to question that I hadn't always been this way. I -." He winces. Shakes his head. "I run instead of fighting. I hide every time someone tries to see me. I'm not - this comfort you're so convinced I have I took at the cost of other people who were braver and stronger than I could ever be. Do you - is that an admirable quality, to you?"
Buck wishes they'd sat, like Tommy seemed to have been hinting at. He wishes he'd spent the ride over preparing himself for this, instead of stopping himself from crawling into Tommy's lap and getting a horrible rider rating for his trouble. He wishes -
"Do you think I don't already know all those things about you?"
It's - actually, it makes him a little furious, to think that Tommy spent six months thinking he'd successfully hid all those things from Buck. And - sure, he hadn't exactly been forthcoming about more than a few of those things, but like -
It wasn't like Buck didn't actively find ways to pry stories from Howie and Hen, even Bobby on occasion. It wasn't like Buck hadn't noticed the clipped way Tommy spoke of his past, his family, always tucking away more than he revealed. It wasn't like Buck wasn't well aware that Tommy Kinard had the capacity to be a total fucking asshole, if he wanted. Just because he'd kept it cool around Buck, made it just flirty enough for plausible deniability -
"You deserve better than that. Than me."
"Then be better than that, Tommy." It's not the best way to get his point across, but... "I've had multiple serious relationships, Tommy. I'm - I've been in love, before, and I've had my heart broken before, and I've had my trust broken before, and I've made people I love feel like shit. You weren't new and exciting, Tommy, we were - we were boring and domestic and it was the best six months of my life. It was what I -."
And this, of course, is where the words start to crest over, too many at once while his mouth tries to keep up and his throat is too tight to -
He swallows. Stares at his toes until his vision swims. Maybe those are tears, or maybe he's just stared long enough to go cross-eyed. His throat feels like he might be able to scrape a few words out
"I go too fast sometimes. I - I get scared I'm falling behind and so I clear a few hurdles too fast to catch back up and it -." Frustration rises through him as he remembers the way Tommy had levered himself up, spun away, broken things off without even a hint of the careful consideration Buck had grown so used to. "And you just - you tell me you want more than anything to be my last but you can't even give me the closure of a clean break! What the hell was that about?"
"Evan, I -."
"No! Okay, no. It's my turn to - it's my turn to be mad. It's my turn to - do you know how lonely I've been? How - how much I'm in my own head about where I went wrong, and what I could have done differently, and why you won't just fucking text me when you clearly want to? Do you know - do you know what it's like to think you've finally found something worth the humiliation of being known and then have it vanish in a single night? Over - you never talked to me about any of the shit you brought up that night, Tommy! You never - if you were so scared of not being enough to keep me interested, or so sure you weren't a good enough man, or so sure I couldn't possibly know what I wanted out of this, you could have saved us a hell of a lot of time and - and hurt by not being exactly the person I thought I could spend the rest of my life with! If that was all a - a smokescreen, some act, then why did you - are you actually so cruel that you convinced me we were falling in love while you had one foot out the door the whole time?"
Tommy's grip on the bottle looks painful.
"It's your turn to talk," Buck snipes, and he takes a little satisfaction in the way Tommy blanches. Just a little. Just enough to ignore how much he wants to rip Tommy's suit jacket at the straining shoulder seams and bite a bruise into that spot below his collarbone that even Tommy's undershirts hid well enough to keep the team at Harbor from putting him on blast for coming to work covered in hickeys.
"Six months with you was more devastating than two decades of hiding who I was, Evan," Tommy says, and it's a horrible opening that makes Buck feel like he's being drawn and quartered but he'd given Tommy the floor, so -
Tommy's eyes are a little too misty to call them anything but welling, and Buck hates it as much as it satisfies the pieces of himself he's spent weeks trying to pick up and glue back together.
"Evan, I lived with Abby for years and I don't think I saw her as much as I saw you. You -." He swipes a hand through his hair, and rustles one of his Superman curls loose to drape tauntingly over his forehead. Buck wants to bite him. He wants it to hurt. "You burrowed in and you just kept digging and I didn't take a second to question it until it was too late."
"Too late for what?"
"For me to take the cowards way out and leave before it hurt."
"Maybe I should have dug further," Buck snaps, and Tommy's gaze flits to his. Holds, for the first time all night. He's breathtaking in the best and worst way possible. He's spent weeks now trying to imagine anyone else ever making him feel the way prolonged eye contact with this man makes him feel.
"You did," Tommy admits, a confession that sounds like it's been gut punched right out of him. "You still -." Another grimace, Tommy pulling back, pulling away, hiding, running, and Buck can't -
"So what is this, Tommy? Is this - are you -?" He shakes his head to clear the cobwebs. Rears up, pushes off the counter, and Tommy's eyes widen like he's just now realized he doesn't have an easy exit. Buck just stands there, though. "If this is it, let this be it. If you don't want - if you're not willing to fight for this with me, tell me now. I know I'm - I know I'm a lot. I know I push for more when I'm scared. I know I'm overwhelming, and I sometimes can't stop talking to save my life, and I know I'm jealous and petty and - I know I'm not perfect."
Tommy sets his bottle on the counter beside him. Worries his lip between his teeth and rolls his jaw.
"You snore. You're a bitch sometimes and every once in a while it's not even charming. You hog all the covers and then you complain that it's too hot. You're vague about every single thing in your past that you think makes you seem like a bad person. You always think food needs more garlic and sometimes you're wrong. Sometimes when I spiral you just give me that stupid indulgent smile of yours and I know you stopped listening two reddit threads ago. When you're grumpy sometimes it takes everything in me not to pick a fight because you're such an asshole. You get cagey every time I pick at a thread you don't want to unravel and I - I hate it. I wanted a life with you and you couldn't stick around long enough to tell me why you were too afraid to go for it. So if - if you think I'm seeing you with rose colored glasses, or whatever. If you think I'm not - if you think being the first guy makes you too special for this to be real then just..." He sucks in a breath. Blows it out through his nose and feels the ache in his chest that's half remnants of his earlier panic attack and half fear that Tommy will actually turn and walk out at the end of this. "If you don't wanna fight for this I'll fill in the hole I dug as best I can and I'll leave you alone, okay?"
The look on Tommy's face is one he's never seen before. They've done this dance, or parts of it, at least. Tommy'd left him outside Micelli's, breathless and confused and aching, before he ever knew what it was like to hold his hand, to press his nose into the join of his neck and shoulder, to curl a hand in his hair or be filled by him - with attention, with affection, with the weight of his body and the stretch of his cock. Even then, this had felt different. Real, in a way the misty edges of his time with Abby, or the way Buck's puzzle pieces had never quite fit with Taylor's had never been. Even then, he'd just wanted so desperately to know and be known by Tommy that he'd taken his second chance and run with it.
"I don't snore," Tommy says, when the silence gets too heavy, and Buck - god, Buck has missed that tone, the snappy little tilt of his head, the blatant lie that passes over Tommy's lips so smoothly it's hard to tell sometimes that he's not being serious.
"I have audio proof," Buck says, and then doesn't immediately admit that he'd played it on a loop two nights into the breakup when he'd wrapped his entire body around the spare pillows on his bed and still hadn't been able to sleep alone in his bed.
"It bugs me that you spent days following scraps of information about a dead outlaw you convinced yourself cursed you, but you didn't even know what a Kinsey scale was."
This is - progress. This is... not Tommy bolting.
"I'm a two. If that's - is that, like, gay enough for you, or...?"
"You go too fast for me, Buckley," he says, and Buck knows that's a fucking reference to something he doesn't have context for just as well as he knows he's willing to spend the next decade waiting for the reference to pop up on Tommy's list. It's a terrifying, exhilarating thought and it's probably exactly what Tommy means.
"I can slow down," Buck says, and he tries to mean it. Nothing about how he feels about Tommy is slow.
"I don't want you to," Tommy admits, and then lets the silence stretch. They're two and a half feet away from each other and the distance feels like the farthest he's ever been from Tommy and the closest he may ever be again. "Living together, making a life together..." He swallows. "Marriage." That stops him short just long enough to recall how he'd blazed right past the I love you and straight into how he could keep Tommy. "You scare the shit out of me every goddamn minute of every goddamn day and I've never missed being terrified as much as I have since I walked out that door."
"I'm in love with you," Buck tells him, and Tommy blinks back tears. Takes a shaky breath and nods.
"That's what scares me. It's never - it's never been enough, before."
He'd sort of expected this to end with either the echo of his KitchenAid or a frantic rush up the stairs, but when Tommy meets him halfway all he does is sink his nose into the curls behind Buck's ear and breathe.
His arms drag Buck closer, his feet shuffle beneath them, his chin hooks over Buck's shoulder and he breathes, and breathes, and breathes.
---
"Your morning breath is rancid," Tommy tells him, palm centered on Buck's nose when he leans in for a kiss, pads of his fingers curled just slightly so that his hand is nearly encasing Buck's entire face. He wants to be annoyed but it's mind numbingly hot and Buck has missed it. Missed the snark, and the comfortable way Tommy will shoot him down when his head is in the clouds, and exactly how fucking large Tommy is.
"I'm so tired of avocado toast," Buck bats back, and Tommy is distracted enough by his need to make a face at that for Buck to swoop in and press a kiss to his cheek. He makes sure to make it a little wet just to watch Tommy's face crinkle in mock disgust.
He's in one of Buck's hoodies, is wearing the pair of his own sweats Buck had buried in the back of his closet in a fit of pique three days post breakup. He still looks properly debauched and Buck wants to drag him right back to bed.
Except -
"You don't have to go," Buck repeats, for the fifth time since he brought it up somewhere between peeling Tommy out of his suit pants and rolling out of bed to warm a hand towel under the sink so that Tommy could clean the cum off his abs. "But I need to shower and leave in like - twenty-seven minutes."
Tommy catches him by the waist and drags him in. "I won't be able to stay. You baked and I took as much holiday overtime as I could, but if you seriously want me there -."
"I seriously want you everywhere."
Tommy raises a brow.
"I mean that in a horny way and a codependent way."
Tommy snorts. "Good to know we're approaching this in a healthy manner."
"You told me not to slow down," Buck reminds him, and he gets a smack to his ass for his trouble.
"When Maddie pulls me aside, do you think she'll just slip me a poisoned glass of wine, or is she gonna get up on a step stool and make me stand there while she strangles me to death?"
"She won't do that." Buck leans in again, rolls a loose curl between two fingers. "She'll just stab you in the middle of the kitchen and warn my parents not to step in the blood."
"That's comforting."
Tommy takes a utilitarian shower in the downstairs bathroom and doesn't let Buck join him, and then rifles through Buck's closet until he finds all three of his button downs Buck had tucked away.
He has to borrow a pair of Buck's slacks and Buck absolutely does not mind that his ass is definitely gonna stretch them out.
With about seventy seconds to spare, Tommy presses Buck to his front door and kisses him just long enough to screw up Buck's meticulous timing - by the time he pulls back and gives Buck enough room to glance at the time on his stove, Buck knows they're gonna hit just enough red lights to make them late.
"I love you too, by the way," Tommy murmurs, and just this once, Buck decides not to be a brat about being five minutes late.
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runawaycarouselhorse · 17 hours ago
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I remembered the children of Israel complaining to Musa [Moses] that they miss the garlic [or perhaps grains] onions fuul/fava beans and lentils they ate in Egypt in the Quran...
The ancient Arabs, too, just basically ate milk, dates, and wheat. You get all the nutrients you need from those three (dates are highly nutritious, but they're fruits, so they lack nutrients like B12 which you can only get from animal sources--hence the milk!), meat was traditionally very, very, very rare. People only had meat for big celebrations, to present to guests as a sign of hospitality, the Prophet Muhammad would go for months without a fire being lit to cook anything in his home...
Don't forget issues like famines, 'Umar bin Al-Khattab found it excessive if anyone should eat meat more than once a month!
For most of human history, we didn't have food in abundance and people lived off pretty simple food... in the west, hummus gets treated like a fancy rich people food, but in the east (Middle East, really), bean paste and flat bread is what my grandfather was used to having for breakfast every day... I love fava beans and chickpeas with a little lemon juice (my dad prefers putting olive oil on top)... labnah on the side is heavenly! If you like spicy food, add a dash of the brine from some jalapenos (or, if you really love spicy food, put some jalapenos in there!) for a fun twist. Whatever isn't eaten, pack it up, reheat portions of it for days... it's fun! You can buy canned bean pastes for your base (just heat them up the first time in a pan, with a little olive oil, preferably.) ^^
(Note: boycott the Sabra brand of hummus, though, if you're avoiding Israeli products.)
So, eat your bread and cheese and water (and treat yourself to some cured meats or eggs!), be happy if you can afford fresh fruits and vegetables to munch on, jams and preserves help so much to keep them for longer... simple foods have kept people alive for a long, long time.
There have been some changes, unfortunately, to how nutritious fruits and vegetables are, to make the plants produce fruit for longer or even year-round, packaging fruits often means they're taken down not fully ripened yet, so they didn't have enough time to get as much nutrition as they need from the soil, but hey, you can have a multi-vitamin on the side of your breakfast to help. Take care of yourself.
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For those who have overactive guilt complexes like me…
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zhelin-thames · 2 days ago
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A Growing Circle of Bats (wrong number)
Read the previous posts to know what happend before Masterpost
Danny was sitting cross-legged on his bed, sipping a soda while reading over one of Tim’s million texts about ghost technology. Jason had texted earlier to warn him that “Tech Boy’s enthusiasm can be dangerous,” and Danny was starting to believe it.
Then his phone buzzed with a message from yet another new number.
Unknown Number: Hey, are you Danny?
Danny groaned, setting his drink down.
Danny: ...Yes? Who’s asking now?
Unknown Number: I’m Dick. Jason and Tim wouldn’t shut up about you, so I thought I’d say hi.
Danny blinked.
Danny: Wait, let me guess. Another one of the Bat-family?
Dick: Guilty as charged. I’m the oldest, so I have to make sure Jason and Tim aren’t harassing you too much. They’re... persistent.
Danny: That’s one way to put it.
Dick: So what’s your deal? Jason said something about ghosts and a billionaire villain?
Danny: Ugh, yeah. That’s the gist of it. My life is basically one long supernatural sitcom, featuring a half-ghost me, an undead billionaire weirdo, and a lot of property damage.
Dick: Sounds wild. Do you ever get a break?
Danny: Not really. Ghosts don’t exactly take vacations.
While Danny and Dick were chatting, Tim and Jason were having their own conversation.
“Did you seriously give Dick Danny’s number?” Jason asked, staring at his phone.
“Why not?” Tim replied, not looking up from his laptop. “He’s part of the family. Besides, Danny could use more normal conversations, and Dick’s the most sociable.”
Jason snorted. “Dick’s about as ‘normal’ as a flying acrobat who fights crime in spandex can get.”
Back on Danny’s end, the conversation had taken an unexpected turn.
Dick: So, are you into acrobatics? Or martial arts?
Danny: Uh, I mean, I’ve fought a lot of ghosts. Does that count?
Dick: Definitely. Fighting’s a skill. Jason said you’ve got powers too?
Danny: Yeah, I can go intangible, invisible, and shoot ectoplasm. Oh, and I can fly.
Dick: Flying? Okay, I’m officially jealous. That’s way cooler than grappling hooks.
Danny: It’s not all great. Flying makes you a bigger target when you’re fighting people who can fly too. Or when you’re dodging ghost lasers.
Dick: Fair point. But still, flying’s gotta feel amazing. Have you ever raced anyone?
Danny grinned at the question.
Danny: Not really. But I think I’d win. I’m pretty fast.
Dick: Challenge accepted. If we ever meet, I’m racing you.
Later that evening, Jason’s phone buzzed with a group chat notification.
Group Chat Name: Danny Phantom Appreciation Club
Members: Jason, Tim, Dick, Danny
Danny: What is this?
Tim: A group chat. Easier than texting us all individually.
Jason: It was Tim’s idea. Don’t blame me.
Dick: Hi, Danny! Welcome to the club.
Danny: You guys are insane.
Jason: And you’re stuck with us now, Little Ghost.
Danny: Why do I feel like this is the start of something terrifying?
Dick: Because it probably is. But we’re fun terrifying.
Danny: ...I’m doomed, aren’t I?
Tim: Yep. Welcome to the family.
Danny couldn’t help but laugh, shaking his head. For all their chaos, the Bat-family was growing on him. Maybe having them around wouldn’t be so bad after all.
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supernovafics · 2 days ago
Text
𝐋𝐄𝐓 𝐌𝐄 𝐁𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐒
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read part one here!
pairing: steve harrington x fem!reader
word count: 6.8k words
summary: in which spending the night with steve only makes things more complicated 
warnings: explicit language, cheating (both reader and steve are cheating on their partners), implied smut, a lot of angst
author’s note: did this for the like ten ppl that asked for it<333 i listened to a lot (A LOT) of i, carrion (icarian) by hozier while writing this so that pretty much explains the super angsty vibes we have throughout most of this lol (angst with a happy ending though so no need to hate me! 🫶🏾)
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
The time couldn’t have been later than six o’clock. 
For the most part, it was still dark outside, but you could see the beginning bits of the sun rising through Steve’s thin curtains. 
And it was then that you realized that you were still in Steve’s bed when you definitely shouldn’t have been. A fresh wave of guilt began to settle in your stomach as you shifted around to face him. He was still asleep, lips slightly parted and hair a mess. 
You needed to leave— you actually should’ve left hours ago, but you’d fallen asleep way too easily in his bed; something that you’d actually never done before. And even now you still couldn’t find it in you to move, so you instead kept looking at him and pushed away the guilt that quietly gnawed at your stomach and told you that you should be running away right now. 
“You’re staring,” Steve mumbled after a few moments, eyes still shut and the tiniest hint of a smirk on his face. 
You quickly shook your head even though he obviously couldn’t see you. “Not true.” 
His eyes opened and you immediately closed yours, knowing that he caught you but you still pretended as if you were innocent. 
You felt him poke your side barely a second later and you laughed despite yourself. Your eyes opened and you didn’t hesitate to meet his gaze, but then seeing the small happy smile on his face reminded you of why you shouldn’t have been in his bed right then. 
You shifted so that your head was back against the pillow and you stared up at his ceiling, focusing on a random spot. “So, um, are you feeling okay after last night?”
You decided against specifying exactly what happened last night to save you from pointing out the elephant in the room— him being drunk and showing up to your house and a conversation that was honest but also not at all somehow leading here. 
“Yeah, just a headache, but not really.”
You promptly decided to use that as an excuse to get out of his bed. “I’ll go grab something for you. Is the aspirin still in the same spot in your bathroom?”
“Yeah, but you don’t have to do that.”
You shook your head as you pulled the blanket off and got up. “No, it’s fine.”
You stepped through the door that connected to his bathroom. You avoided looking at yourself in the mirror, for reasons that you couldn’t fully decipher, and simply rummaged through the drawer underneath his sink for a quick second. 
Steve was still in the same position in his bed when you returned to his room, except now he was looking at you with a confused look in his eyes. 
He didn’t say anything or call you out on your current antics though as you tossed over the bottle of aspirin to him, and then you realized something. 
“Oh, you need water too. I’ll be right back.”
“You don’t—”
You waved him off before he could finish his statement and slipped out of his room, not giving him a chance to say anything else. 
It didn’t take long, you knew his house fairly well, and doing the mundane task of finding a glass and filling it with some water was enough to help clear your mind and make you think about everything logically. You realized just how much of a mistake last night was, but the only good thing was that this would be easy to recover from. You two could still go your separate ways and let your different lives completely go back to how they were before you two started sneaking around with each other. 
When you got back to Steve’s room, he was sitting up and leaning back against his headboard. He pushed a hand through his hair, which actually did very little to tame its messiness. 
“Here you go,” You said as you handed over the glass. 
He smiled at you. “Thanks.”
You simply nodded in response at first and then you were speaking. “Yeah, no problem.”
You lingered awkwardly by his bed because you didn’t want to get back in, but you felt as if there was a lot more you should say before you left. “Hey, um, can we agree to actually not do this anymore? I still stand by everything I said in the bathroom yesterday.”
His confused look returned. “We didn’t do anything last night.”
“Yeah, and I think that’s somehow worse,” You told him as you turned away because it became too hard to hold his gaze right then. You grabbed your hoodie off the back of his door and slipped it on. “Let’s just let things go back to normal, okay? You with Nancy and me with Jamie.”
It didn’t necessarily feel right saying the words, but they felt needed. You had to say them. You had to pretend that everything was fine, or that it at least had the potential to be that way. 
“I broke up with Nancy last night.”
For a second, all you could do was simply look at him as the words processed in your brain because at first you were convinced that you heard him wrong. But once they did process, you were immediately blurting out, “What? When?”
“Before I got drunk and saw you,” He answered, voice way too soft to match this huge news that he was dropping on you. 
You shook your head and sighed as you realized that everything wasn’t going to easily go back to normal and be fine like you wanted it to be. “God, Steve, I really wish you would’ve told me that last night.”
“Would it have changed anything? Is it changing anything now?”
“I wouldn’t have let myself come here,” You answered immediately. “If you had told me this when you were standing on my front lawn, I would’ve told you to go and try to get back with her.”
There was a lot more that you could’ve said— that you would’ve seen the conversation you two had last night right here in his bedroom entirely different if you’d known, and you wouldn’t have let yourself fall asleep in his arms if you knew that there wasn’t any hope for things to go back to normal because he no longer had a “normal” to go back to. And you wouldn’t let yourself be here with him in this moment either. 
“Is it changing anything now?” Steve asked again when he noticed that you hadn’t answered that question. 
“No... No, it’s not,” You said after the briefest moment of hesitation and then turned away from him again. “I’m gonna go. You should try to fix things with her.”
“Why do you want me to be with her so bad?” You could hear him ask as you closed his bedroom door behind you. 
Because then I’d feel a little less terrible about all of this. You wanted to practically scream that at him. You wanted him to understand that if things could just go back to how they were then you’d feel okay about how shitty of a person you’d been for the past month and a half. At least, that was the hope. 
However, you didn’t tell him any of that. 
“It’s just, it’s the right thing to do, Steve,” You responded loud enough for him to hear you through the shut door. 
You headed down the stairs, not listening to see if Steve said anything else, and you were in the middle of putting on your shoes when you heard his door open again. You tied your sneakers quickly and terribly because you hoped that you’d be able to slip out before Steve made it down the stairs. 
Perhaps you two needed to have a better conversation that would actually come to some sort of proper conclusion, but you couldn’t do that right then. And then you quickly figured that if you kept pushing him away, maybe he’d get the hint and push you away too, or simply let go. 
You were only able to pull open the front door before you abruptly stopped your fast movements.  
Because Nancy was standing in front of you, finger seconds away from ringing the doorbell. Her eyes met yours and you suddenly wished for the ground to swallow you whole. 
She looked like a girl that had just been broken up with, eyes puffy and red like she’d been crying all night, and you knew that was entirely your fault. An immediate “I’m so sorry” was on the tip of your tongue, but you couldn’t say that, not right then. She had the saddest look on her face that was quickly replaced with surprise and confusion when she saw you standing where you were.
“Oh, oh, hey. I was, um… I was just leaving,” You said to her, trying to sound as normal as possible but this was perhaps the most not normal situation ever.
Her eyes immediately narrowed at you. “Oh my god, I knew it.” 
You wondered what she meant. Did she mean that she knew that Steve was cheating, or she knew that he was cheating with you?
You obviously didn’t ask her to clarify, though. Instead, you slipped past her and started walking away. The last thing you heard was Steve saying, “Nance, what are you doing here?” and her responding with some angry words that you felt as if you shouldn’t have heard.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
After the moment you and Steve had on New Year’s— an abrupt kiss on a swing set that led to a lot more kissing in his car—  a sort of routine quickly formed. It became a cycle of ending up in his car or your car or his house, and it was exactly three weeks after New Year’s when he finally saw the inside of yours. 
It was a rare one-off situation where your parents were gone for the weekend and you knew that you weren’t supposed to have anyone over; not even Jamie, even though they’d known him for practically forever. 
You had never had the urge to break the rule before and Jamie wanted to keep a good relationship with your parents and was also too nice to suggest breaking it either, so you initially thought that your nights would be quiet. 
Except you now had Steve in your life. And he didn’t mind breaking the rule of your parents who he hadn’t even met, so he came over to your house around ten o’clock. 
You were immediately trying to pull him in for a kiss when you closed the front door behind him, but he pulled back with a teasing smile.
“Can I at least get a tour before you try to seduce me?”
You playfully rolled your eyes at him but still nodded at his request. “Of course, I’m so sorry, where are my manners?”
You grabbed his hand before you could think too much about it, and quickly led him through your house and pointed out everything. “Kitchen, small dining room, living room, guest room and bathroom down the hall. And that’s pretty much it for down here. Nothing as extravagant as your house.” 
“I like it.”
“Don’t get too attached because this is the only time that this will happen here.” 
You didn’t outwardly say the exact reason why that was probably the case— it would never make sense for him to come over any other time; it would either be too risky with your parents right down the hall or during a time when Jamie was over. But, Steve understood all of what was left unspoken.
“Got it,” He said and then he smiled at you. “Can I see upstairs?”
You nodded, leading the way once again. “My parents' room is down that way, and I’m right here.”
The door was already open so you let him walk in first. There wasn’t too much you found embarrassing about your bedroom, not the full shelf of books or the few posters that hung on the wall above your desk. The only thing that made your cheeks warm in embarrassment was the wallpaper on your walls that you had since you were a kid and had hoped to change sooner rather than later, but you had just never gotten around to it.  
Steve looked at you after a moment. “Cute room.”
“One day those pink unicorns will no longer be on the wall.”
“I like them. They add character.”
You couldn’t help but roll your eyes even as you laughed at his words. “Shut up.”
The teasing smirk on his face didn’t manage to annoy you as he stepped closer to you and the distance between you two became nonexistent. He leaned in and kissed you then because that was what was supposed to happen and it probably should’ve happened sooner; what you two were doing wasn’t meant to be anything more or less than physical. 
Your freshly made bed became a mess in a matter of moments and clothes were quickly scattered on the floor; his jeans and t-shirt gone and your own tank top and shorts tossed somewhere to the side too.
It was fairly early for a Friday night, and you kind of wondered how Steve could even be here right now, but neither of you ever asked where each other’s person was. It was just quietly understood that when you two were together it meant that some excuse had been made or some lie had been told so that this could happen. 
A part of you knew that you’d eventually feel bad about all of this, but it had only been three weeks and you were able to forget about how bad you should’ve been feeling when you and Steve were together like this; not an ounce of space between your bodies and limbs tangled beneath bedsheets. Weirdly enough, it just felt too right even though it was objectively wrong. 
Soft kisses trailed along your neck and collarbone and then proceeded to move lower and lower. All you could do was sigh in contentment and your eyes slipped shut as you let Steve turn your mind to mush for the time being. 
“You’ve read all of these?” Steve asked you later; when you were heading back into your bedroom after using the bathroom and you saw him standing next to your bookshelf. 
He was shirtless with only his jeans hanging low on his hips, which made sense since you were wearing his t-shirt right then; it had been the closest thing to you afterward. Now, though, you pulled it off and tossed it over to him and then went to grab your own shirt. 
“Yeah,” You simply answered his question as you searched around your room for your underwear and slipped it on once you spotted it partially under your bed. 
Steve pulled one of the books off of the shelf, you couldn’t see what the title said even as you moved a little closer to him. “This is the one that we had to read for that English project last year.” 
You nodded. “Oh, yeah, I liked it a lot, actually.”
“I barely remember anything that happened in it.” 
“That’s not surprising and it’s probably the reason why we got a B+ on that project.”
Steve placed the book on the shelf and then turned around to face you. “Hey, a B+ is great.”
“Yeah, for you, but for a person that actually really likes English, not so much,” You told him and then smiled to show that, for the most part, you were joking. 
He held up his hands in mock surrender. “Sorry for holding you back on that project.”
“Apology accepted,” You said. “I also really don’t even need an apology because I’ve had much worse partners than you on things before.”
“Okay, in that case, I feel honored that I haven’t been the worst person you’ve ever had to work with.”
You laughed a little. “And I hope I was the best person you’ve ever had to work with.”
Steve nodded. “Of course, you definitely were.”
You were pretty sure he was joking— even though he didn’t entirely sound like it— so you continued playing along. “I feel honored.”
He stepped closer to you and for a second you thought that he was going to kiss you again, and although that never happened after, you didn’t think that you would’ve reminded him of that or pushed him away. He didn’t kiss you, though; he stopped before he got that close to you and started heading toward your open bedroom door instead. 
“I should probably go,” He said, and you nodded in agreement. 
He could’ve easily stayed the night if either of you wanted that to happen. But, he didn’t ask and you didn’t offer. It would’ve been wrong to, you both could silently agree on that. 
You were kind of starting to become okay with things becoming more and more wrong, though. 
This was meant to be mindless and solely physical, but it was becoming a sort of routine, second nature in a way, to talk about random nonsense or joke around with each other. 
However, staying the night felt like a line you two shouldn’t cross; it felt different than just talking for a while after. It felt a thousand times more intimate and serious and like it went several steps past just having sex or being two people who talked about way too much with each other sometimes. 
“I’ll see you later,” Steve said before he opened your front door. 
“Yeah,” You nodded. “Goodnight.”
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
Barely a month later, and the line had been crossed.
The unspoken rule was broken and there wasn’t even any point to spiral out about it because that somehow wasn’t the worst thing that happened. 
Everything was ruined, or it at least soon would be because you couldn’t imagine Nancy sitting on this information and not telling anyone. She was rightfully mad and maybe you deserved whatever would happen once all of this spread around the school. 
Your walk home from Steve’s house was quick and the sun was completely up by the time you made it through your front door, but it was still early enough that your parents were still asleep and wouldn’t know that you’d been gone for the entire night. 
A part of you wanted to simply just go to sleep when you stepped back into your bedroom, sleep through the entire day, and just forget about everything. But then there was the other part of you that couldn’t not think about everything; the inevitable explosion that was coming sooner rather than later, and it didn’t even feel entirely dramatic to view it that way. 
Ultimately, you decided to take a shower because it felt like the only thing that would help you feel a little better. It ended up being the longest shower you’d had in a while and it actually didn’t do much to make you feel any differently. There was still the guilt that had made a home in your stomach when you woke up and it was now coupled with a lot of dread. 
You left for school at the time you were supposed to leave, saying a quick goodbye to your parents before stepping out of the door, but you turned left instead of right at the end of your block and ended up at a diner. You stayed there for probably way too long, sipping coffee instead of anything else because you couldn’t stomach the thought of having actual food right then. 
You thought about how you could fix things, and if there was even any hope to fix anything, and also what exactly was there to fix. You didn’t want to hurt Jamie, but you were certain that you did, and what could you even say to him now that would magically “fix” what you’d done? 
That you loved him and still wanted to be with him? That everything that happened with Steve was a stupid mistake and you regretted it entirely? 
You had lied a lot over the past month and a half and you didn’t want to just continue piling onto it. But, then the thought of being a thousand percent honest felt way too scary. 
And when thinking about how fucked your life was became too much, you took the newspaper that a random older man offered you and sipped more coffee, and reread the same articles over and over again. 
You eventually showed up to school halfway through lunch. Missing the entire day felt a bit too cowardly and you also remembered that you had to take a Chemistry quiz at the end of the day. However, you didn’t immediately step out of your car once you were parked in the school parking lot. Instead, you leaned your head back against the headrest and let out a sigh, eyes slipping shut in the process as you mentally prepared yourself for whatever you'd have to face inside those walls. 
An abrupt quick knock against your window scared you and made you open your eyes. It was Jamie standing at your passenger side window and you could feel your heart speed up in your chest, and it wasn’t because you’d just been startled by him. 
But, he didn’t look mad at you, just confused, and that felt like a good sign; maybe that meant that the “inevitable” actually hadn’t happened yet. 
You gave him a small wave and then he opened the door and proceeded to get in your car. 
“Where’ve you been?”
“I wasn’t really feeling good this morning, but then I remembered my Chem quiz last period and I don’t wanna miss that.”
He nodded. “Oh, okay.”
He wasn’t looking at you— you could tell that he was purposely avoiding eye contact with you, actually— and it was that that made you realize that he knew. 
“I’m so sorry,” You blurted out. 
“Is it true?”
“I’m so sorry.”
Finally, his eyes met yours and the hurt look on his face made you want to break his gaze, but it would’ve been too shitty to look away because you suddenly felt bad. “I don’t get it... Steve Harrington? Really? Do you wanna be with him now?”
For a second, you didn’t say anything. You couldn’t; no words would form on your lips. And it was then that you realized that you weren’t ready to be honest with this guy sitting next to you who you’d known since you were twelve and considered your best friend since then too. It shouldn’t have felt so fucking hard, but it did, and the worst part of it was that you knew that you had to tell him the truth anyway. 
“Honestly, Steve has nothing to do with how I feel about us and you,” You ultimately said, realizing that you weren’t completely answering Jamie’s question, but he didn’t call you out on it. “I’d been feeling… off about things for a while, but I wanted to pretend like I wasn’t. I wanted to pretend that everything was fine and normal between you and me, so I pushed those “off” feelings away and buried them down, and acted as if they didn’t exist. I lied a lot to myself because I was scared that I’d mess everything up. And then I saw Steve on New Year’s and we did something stupid and shitty that didn’t feel that way at the time, and that’s when I started lying to you. And all of the lying and what me and him were doing never felt completely terrible and wrong until yesterday. But, by the time I actually wanted to do the right thing and try to be a good person, it was too late. And maybe that’s actually a good thing because I would’ve just kept lying to myself and to you too if things hadn’t blown up this way.”
You were rambling and probably not making any sense right then. The thought of ruining absolutely everything still weighed so heavily on you, even though the damage was already pretty much done. There was no recovering from this and there was no “fixing” things, you realized now. However, you were still explaining and explaining and hoping that maybe things could somehow be okay.  
A confused look crossed Jamie’s face. “Why didn’t you just tell me how you were feeling about us before?”
“Because I’m a coward and I wanted to avoid all of this,” You admitted. “And also because it was just so confusing. I love you, you’re my best friend, so it didn’t make sense to me why I was no longer in love with you. And the thought of having any sort of conversation about this scared the shit out of me because I don’t wanna lose you completely.”
Things became quiet for a second and Jamie looked away from you, staring straight ahead at the parking lot instead. 
After a moment, he started speaking again. “Remember back in seventh grade, and I’m pretty sure most of eighth grade too, you used to make me turn around or close my eyes whenever you wanted to tell me some sort of secret?”
The abrupt subject change surprised you, but you nodded anyway. “Yeah, I remember that.”
You weren’t ever entirely sure why you would do that so much. Jamie was the first person you’d ever gotten super close to and you felt like you could tell any and all of your secrets to him, but the act of doing so scared you, so you’d make him look away whenever you did. He thought it was a little weird at first, but he came around to the antic after the first few times. 
“You eventually stopped doing that and you started telling me everything right to my face,” He continued and you understood where he was going then. “I thought that meant that you felt like you could tell me anything, especially all of the shitty stuff.”
“I didn’t want to hurt you,” You said, and it was a bad excuse, but it was also honest. “And I know that I just ended up hurting you, anyway. Probably a thousand times worse than if I just told you the truth from the beginning.”
He looked at you again. “So, what’s the truth?”
You wanted to break his gaze so badly, but you forced yourself not to. “I love you, I really do, but I want things to go back to how they used to be with us. I wanna just be friends. I’m sorry.”
“Okay,” He said softly, and he didn’t sound completely hurt, but you still felt terrible. 
“I’m sorry,” You told him again because it felt like the only thing to say right then. 
He lightly shook his head at you, like he didn’t want you to keep saying it. “At least I don’t have to be scared of your dad anymore.”
His joke made you smile and inwardly sigh in relief; maybe things actually could somehow be okay. 
“There’s literally never been any reason to be scared of him. He likes you more than me. Who else can he talk about basketball with?”
Jamie cracked a small smile at that and a comfortable silence lingered for a bit as you took a look at the time displayed across the dashboard. There were only about fifteen minutes left of lunch and it probably would’ve been a good use of your time to focus on studying for your quiz later, but you didn’t bring it up right then and you didn’t move to grab your bookbag from the backseat. This moment actually felt okay and you didn’t want to be the one to break it.
“I’m just realizing that you didn’t answer my question from before,” Jamie eventually said. 
You glanced at him, confused. “What question?”
“Do you want to be with him? With Steve?”
You weren’t entirely sure how to respond to that, but you were opening your mouth to stutter out something anyway because staying silent felt like it would’ve been an answer in itself. 
Before you could manage to say anything, though, Jamie continued. “Actually, no wait, never mind, I don’t think I wanna know the answer.”
He still didn’t sound entirely mad, but another soft-spoken “I’m sorry” was on the tip of your tongue. However, he was opening the door and stepping out of your car before it could fall from your lips. 
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
This time when the rocks began hitting your window in the middle of the night, they were expected. 
You had actually called Steve asking him to come over and he didn’t say no. There was the smallest part of you that thought that maybe he would. 
You pushed your window open and looked down at him standing on your front lawn. “Come up.”
A confused look crossed his face. “You’re not coming down?”
You shook your head. “No, come up.” 
It was risky, your parents were right down the hall and this was pretty different from you sneaking out, but you couldn’t really find it in you to care. 
The way the roof was angled made it easy for Steve to pull himself up and maneuver his way toward your bedroom window. Steve wasn’t completely graceful doing it, but he tried to be, which made it funnier, but you didn’t laugh and instead only smiled at him once he was through the window and standing in front of you. 
“Did that look cooler than it felt?”
That time you couldn’t help but laugh a little. “No, sorry.”
He pushed a hand through his hair and gave you the smallest smile. “A lie would’ve been appreciated.”
“Oh, what I meant to say was that was actually the hottest thing I’ve ever seen,” You told him and he laughed. 
“Thank you,” He said and then slipped off his jacket and laid it on the back of your desk chair, which left him in just his white t-shirt. “I didn’t see you around school today.”
“Oh yeah, I didn’t really want to go today,” You said with a shrug that you hoped feigned the proper amount of nonchalance. Your answer was only half of the truth— you actually didn’t want to go, but you also couldn’t seem to force yourself to step out of your car after your conversation with Jamie, it felt too hard to, so you instead ended up back at the diner for another handful of hours. 
You sat on the floor at the foot of your bed now, leaning back against it, and Steve followed suit, leaving only a little bit of space between you two. 
You turned your head to look at him. “How bad is everything?”
“Not terrible,” He answered after the briefest moment of hesitation and you could tell that he was attempting to downplay it all for your sake. “It’ll probably blow over by Monday.”
You weren’t sure that was possible, given just how popular Steve was, but you nodded anyway and your eyes fell to your hands in your lap because it was easier than doing anything else. 
Maybe he saw through the half-hearted nod because then he was whispering to you. “It’ll be okay.”
You didn’t say anything in response to those quiet words, but they did manage to soften something inside of you. You pushed away the thought of school and what Monday would look like for you; what everyone probably now thought about you and the shit people would say because of it. 
You looked at Steve again and he gave you a small hopeful-looking smile that you suddenly felt like you didn’t deserve. 
“I feel like I was way too mean to you this morning and I’m really sorry about that,” You abruptly told him. 
Steve shook his head at your words. “It’s okay. Doesn’t matter.”
His hand found one of yours then, intertwining them. It felt like way too tender and sweet of an action, something that had never been done between you two, but it also felt entirely right. 
“Did you ever think about why it was so easy for us to do it? To lie and cheat?” You asked him, not holding eye contact and instead focusing on the floor. 
You knew your own answer to the question, but you wondered what his was because he never seemed entirely unhappy with Nancy, and since you two rarely ever talked about your respective relationships, you felt like you knew nothing about where his head had been. 
“Honestly, I didn’t think about it.”
“Why did you do it?” You asked. “Why’d you want to kiss me that night?”
There was no pause or hesitation before he answered. “Because it was you.”
That was probably the cheesiest thing you’d ever heard, so you immediately nudged his shoulder and rolled your eyes. “Stop it. Be serious.”
“I am serious,” His hand gave yours a light squeeze, forcing you to meet his eyes. “You remember the first time we met up after school to work on that English project?”
You did remember it, but you only nodded because you really wanted to hear what he had to say about it. 
“We hung out for like two hours that day. Worked on the project for a bit and then just talked about random stuff for most of the time, and it was all just so easy for some reason; so damn easy to talk to you. I looked forward to every day that we had to work on the project after that. And then I think it was one of the last few days of us doing it that you randomly mentioned that you had a boyfriend and I realized that I had zero shot with you.”
You weren’t entirely sure what you had expected Steve to say, but you knew that it wasn’t that. He was right that the conversations you two had then had been pretty effortless and nice, but hearing that he liked you all the way back then felt like something that you immediately wanted to shake your head at and deny. There hadn’t been any moments during those two weeks that gave you any indication that he liked you in that way. Yes, he was flirty, and he wasn’t even dating Nancy yet so it could’ve been plausible that he really was flirting with you, but you figured that was just his personality; everyone knew just how damn charming he was. 
“And then all those months later I saw you in that backyard. And things were going fine with me and Nancy, but I suddenly really wanted to talk to you. Because you were alone, and I thought that meant that you and Jamie were over because why else would you be alone on New Year’s? But, no he was still in the picture, but you didn’t tell me to fuck off because of him, so I didn’t.”
Things got quiet for a second and before you could really even think about how to respond to that, Steve was speaking again. “Why’d you let me kiss you that night?”
“I didn’t think about it too much,” You immediately answered him, suddenly finding it so easy to be honest. “Deep down, I knew it was a bad idea, but that wasn’t enough to make me wanna stop it.”
You shifted closer to him, closing the last bit of distance between you two and leaning your head against his shoulder. 
“It was the kind of bad idea that felt like a good one once it was happening if that makes sense,” You continued. “It felt nice and good and really… Right. Even though it shouldn’t have.” 
“Yeah, it always felt right,” Steve agreed, voice soft. “It still does.” 
A part of you couldn’t help but think that even though this moment felt right too, maybe it also shouldn’t have felt that way. But, everything else— what made this all so wrong in the first place— was already ruined and over, so perhaps it was okay to finally lean into this rightness since you wouldn’t end up feeling bad or guilty about it in the long run.  
You pulled your hand away from Steve’s and then shifted so that you were in his lap, legs on either side of him and knees pushing into the carpet below you.
Your eyes met his soft brown ones that looked unsure of what you were about to do or say next. 
“I really like you.”
It was the first time you were admitting it out loud and as the words fell from your lips and settled in the quiet air of your bedroom, you realized just how long you’d been aching to finally say them to him. 
The smile that spread across Steve’s face practically melted your insides. “I really like you too.”
Your hands came up to settle on his shoulders as you nodded and smiled back at him. “Cool, nice to know that we both like each other.”
“Really like each other,” He corrected you and then leaned in to press the quickest kiss against your cheek, which made you laugh a little. 
“Oh, sorry, you’re right,” You said and then it was your turn to lean in. You brushed your nose against his and your eyes slipped shut as you whispered your next words against his lips. “Really like each other.”
You started pulling back but Steve’s mouth chased yours, putting an abrupt end to your teasing. You gave in easily and leaned into him, returning his eagerness and inwardly sighing in contentment at the feeling of his lips on yours. Your pajama shorts rode up as you shifted in his lap and one of Steve’s hands moved to rest on the sides of your thighs to keep you steady. 
You wouldn’t mind kissing him forever. It was a thought that hit you a lot in moments like this— as mouths explored and hands roamed— and this was the first time that that thought didn’t scare or worry you because it wouldn’t actually complicate things like it would have before.
You pulled away from his mouth after a moment and your lips found his neck instead. He let out a low hum the second you grazed your tongue over a particularly sensitive spot on his skin; you had discovered it the second time you two made out in his car and you adored the soft sound he made when you found it. 
“You still have unicorns on the wall,” Steve abruptly said and the words felt so random that you stopped your movements. 
You let out a laugh against his neck. “Shut up. Why are you bringing that up right now?”
“Sorry, I had to turn down the mood somehow,” He said and you pulled back to look at him. “Since your parents are right down the hall.”
“Well, I guess that just means that you have to be really quiet for once.” 
He let out a sound that resembled both a scoff and an amused laugh. “Me?” 
The tiniest hint of a smirk played on your lips as you nodded, fingers threading through the hair at the nape of his neck. “Yeah, you get really loud, Harrington.”
“I think we have very different memories of what this last month has been like,” He said and then he was tilting his head up and finding your lips again before you could potentially say anything in response to him.  
His hands moved from your thighs to your hips and he pulled you down against him. There were some layers separating you two— your thin shorts and the sweatpants Steve had on— but it was still the perfect amount of friction. You were brushing roughly against the tent in his sweatpants, which made you inadvertently moan into the kiss. 
“See?” Steve mumbled against your lips. “You’re the loud one.” 
You pulled back a little, it was too hard not to laugh, even as you playfully rolled your eyes at him. “That was very evil.” 
“I’m sorry,” He said, but smiled at you. “Come on, let’s go to my car. Maybe head to the lake? You can be as loud as you want there.”
You nodded at his teasing suggestion, but still slotted your lips against his once more, not wanting to move out of this position just yet. Steve didn’t seem to mind at all and he pulled you closer, as close as you two had been so many times before.
You could recognize that this was a weird set of circumstances and the smallest part of you was trying to figure out how much of it you’d end up looking back on and regretting— the lies and secrets that started all of this and ended up hurting people just like you knew it would. But, in this moment, you deliberately didn’t think about that. Instead, you focused on Steve and how glad you were that he was here and how happy you were to have him in your life. 
You whispered those sentimental words to him moments after they hit you; labeling them as cheesy and he immediately shook his head and told you that they weren’t. 
“I’m happy too,” He whispered back and one of his hands came up to find your cheek. The way he stroked your skin so tenderly made you suddenly turn shy under his gaze, but that didn’t make you want to look away from him. “That I’m here with you. And that you want me to be.”
“I think I’ll always want you to be,” You said, voice still soft and quiet, and it didn’t hit you how true those words were until they were out in the open. Maybe they were a bit blindly optimistic, but that didn’t change how much you meant them right then.
Steve kissed you again and you two stayed like that for a little longer before you moved out of his lap and the two of you finally headed to his car.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
let me know ur thoughts<333
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kithtaehyung · 1 day ago
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holiday (3tan special) | myg
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title: holiday  pairing: 3tan!yoongi x reader(f)  series: masterlist | three tangerines | fireworks | house party | basketball | stay | sidewalk talk | friends | dalo | like that | anytime | sundress season | yoongi’s interlude | forfeit | flutter | video call | busted | broken (pt. 1) | broken (pt. 2) | lollipop rating/genre: pg (18+) ; fluff ; brother’s best friend au, implied age gap au, holiday au summary: from what you can gather, holiday gift exchanges are supposed to be pretty straightforward. but this one quickly escalates. because no one can follow directions. note: this is all thanks to the person that suggested a 3tan crew secret santa! they don’t do actual secret santa, but they do host a gift exchange. so enjoy this speedily but still tenderly written holiday special! i wanted to get it posted asap so that we could all have it during the holiday season. hope it helps lifting spirits in any way<3  warnings: yoongi looks like sin, but reader does too🤭, kissing, no one follows directions, but especially jimin, hella kissing, no fr jimin is chaos incarnate, sibling holiday woes, tense situations, tender moments, gift exchanges, dialogue heavy i’m so sorry, also not too edited i'm sorry again sdfkljdskl. reader is adorable y'all i wanna cry, 3tan crew being wholesome af drop date: december 27th, 2024, 8:37pm est word count: 8.1k bc i love y’all???
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“Wait… I’m in this, too?” 
Your brother winces while checking his phone, probably also seeing the texts that Jimin sent to a freshly created group chat. “Tae and Chim roped us in this time. But it’s cool if you don’t wanna.” 
As you both don work attire in your foyer, you shake your head, one hand firm on your bag strap, “I don’t even know how they work.”
“I think we random draw names. Then just give a gift to whoever we get.” 
Seeing the names and numbers in here, you’re already running through a lot of possibilities. Maybe too many possibilities. But you don’t wanna make things more complicated or awkward, so you quickly concede, “I mean.. I’m down if you are.”
“I guess it’s cool.”
Head lowered, you notice that your brother’s shoes are the ones you gave him for his birthday a couple years ago. Because those days are the only ones you both celebrate every passing run of three hundred and sixty-five. “At least we’re doing something this year.” 
He chuckles to his feet. “Two years in a row.” 
Your sad laugh tumbles and rolls next to his. “Wild.” 
“Hey.” When he pauses, it’s to wait for you to look up. “If you ever wanna talk about it, we can.” 
There are a lot of times in which you dismiss your brother. Because it’s just what siblings do. 
This time is not one of them. 
“Same,” you offer, the weight of the world dragging your smile down. 
He gives you a hug, and you feel the luxury press of his suit as you lean in with scrunched brows. 
Two years in a row. 
Maybe things do suck less with time. 
When you both head out the door to your cars, you wonder if your brother knows how much you appreciate him and his friends for including you in things. Even if you don’t show it as much as you need to. 
Guess this time of year is a good place to start. 
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Work drags in the wake of oncoming holiday. 
But you’re learning to appreciate the decorations around the office, including the little cards that coworkers have given you at your desk—despite your many protests that they didn’t have to. 
When you look up, you start to notice other things. Like the way people smile just a little more. Or the way peppermint and cider waft around the building, smelling of sweet instead of spice. 
You wonder if Jungkook has decorated the studio, too. Or if he recruited everyone else to help with decorations, which means that Yoongi and the guys had to fuss with lights and whatever else people spend money on.  
Laughing to your many stacks of papers and documents, you start daydreaming of what it would be like to decorate the house.
Would you and your brother do it someday? You do admit that it’s kinda nice to look around the neighborhood. And when you went into the mountains last year, you concede that the surrounding town decor was pretty inviting. 
Maybe your house would be a little brighter on the inside too if you both just…
You get a notification on your phone. When the screen brightens, you see that it’s for the app that shuffles you all for the gift exchange. 
You have no fucking clue what you’re doing.
But here goes.
Opening and hoping you get someone that’s easy to please, you stare at your device and blink a few very hard times. 
And after every time, you still get a name that has your heart quickening faster than reindeer working overtime. It’s reindeer, right? You think that’s cor—
“You okay?” 
Snapping your head up, you notice that one of your coworkers stopped mid-stride to check on you. Staring at his candy cane tie, you try not to be distracted as you slightly cringe, 
“What do I get a guy for the holidays?”
“Friend or lover?” 
Well, that was not what you expected to hear! 
When your jaw unhinges, you’re quick to snap it back into place. “Umm.” 
“Oh, this is juicy,” he perks up, quickly settling into a nearby chair and resting a strong chin in his hand. “Tell me more, I got time.” 
Laughing, you shake your head while pretending to type on your computer. “Nothing to tell.” 
“That means you got a whole lot.” His eyes are way too shiny right now! “But alright, I’m gonna assume both. In which case, I suggest something nice.” 
“Something nice?” 
“You know, like. Nice nice.” 
“It’s for a gift exchange, though,” you slump, hands stopping on the keys. Looking at his whole holiday ensemble, you divulge, “The money limit’s definitely not enough for nice nice.” 
“Then fuck the limit?” 
Your answer is more of a sound than a word. 
But he does get you to consider, even if just for a little bit. “Maybe…” 
“Fuck the limit,” he advises again. “He’s gonna dig that. Especially since everyone will see it.”
Your face falls from the snowy sky. “Everyone?” 
“Uhh, yeah? You said gift exchange, right? Everyone sees what everyone gets.” 
“Oh. Right,” you pretend to agree to your computer. Because no, you actually didn’t know that. “Guess it’s been awhile.” 
“Well, that’s what makes it fun! Good luck.”  
While you would normally agree, you have a whole hoard of conflicting feelings. Because while seeing Yoongi’s name on your screen is enough to get you giddy as hell, you know there’s a couple people that may not share the same sentiments. Especially if you gift him something nice nice. 
In front of everybody.
However… 
As your striped and jingling coworker strides away with a hum, you drum your fingers on your minimally decorated desk. 
Maybe there is a way you can finess this. 
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After a few weeks, the day has come for not just one exchange, but two—your friends also decided to have your own. Because it’s the easiest format, you convinced them with logic, seeing their shock at you being the one to suggest the exchange in the first place. 
When they asked if you were sure, you assured them that it was okay. And the way they all brightened told you that you made a sound decision. Even if they still seemed hesitant, you know it’s because… 
You’ve never done this. 
So as you observe everyone in your bare living room, you start to see how their presence alone illuminates the space, with gifts in shine and glitter painting the area in holiday colors. 
This is nice. 
“So… Uhh.” You clear your throat, watching everyone look at you at the head of your coffee table. “How do we do this?” 
They all laugh before Taehyung explains, “So one of us goes first and says who we got before giving the gift—you can sit, you know.” 
In the midst of more teasing, you settle onto the floor while exclaiming, “I’m nervous, okay! This is really new to me.” 
“You have a gift to give, right?” 
“Yeah?” 
“Then you’re already doing great,” Reia assures, and you’re even more excited to give yours away. Because you drew her name. 
But before you can say that, Taehyung continues, “So after someone gets their gift, they announce who they picked, and so on.” 
“Pretty straightforward,” you observe. “I wanna go first!” 
Dom cackles, “You just wanna get it out of the way.” 
“And?” you question, grinning when you shoot up and grab your very amateurishly wrapped bag. “Okay, okay, I got…”
“This is adorable,” Yuri cuts in, and everyone’s agreement makes you suddenly shy. 
“No! Don’t make fun.” 
“We aren’t!” Taehyung reaches out to rub your leg. “Promise. Who’d you get?” 
“I got… Reia!” You exclaim, raising your bag a bit as she yells with everyone. The sudden raise of noise gets you a little shocked, but hyped nonetheless. And maybe a bit nervous that your gift won’t live up to the excitement. “Sorry about the wrapping job.” 
“What are you talking about, this is so good,” Reia soothes, smiling wide as she delicately takes out the folded paper. “Wow, the wrapping is nice?” 
Dom chimes in as she leans in, “Yeah, this is too good. Did you watch videos?” 
“Uh huh.” 
Everyone laughs again as you keep your nose held high. Because sucky or not, you were not gonna half-ass your first ever gift exchange. With seasoned people, at that. No way. 
When Reia opens the gift you carefully picked while perusing through a local music store, you watch with the anticipation of a small child, eyes wide and waiting. Hoping that the best outcome is the real outcome. 
And when she quietly yells behind her hand, everyone cheers while asking what she got. When she turns the package around, they cheer even more, because it’s a guitar pick set in her favorite colors. And one that you knew was so, very much her. 
She stands up immediately and opens her arms for a hug, and you blink before getting lovingly crushed. 
“Thank you,” she whispers in your ear. “This is more than great.” 
“Of course, babe,” you murmur back, feeling her jean jacket under your palms and a beating in your chest. “Thank you, too.” 
The rest of the exchange goes off without a hitch, with you cheering with everyone and understanding the cues more and more. Everyone’s gifts are wonderful, and Yuri’s the last to go out of the five of you. 
And she got your name. 
You figured giving the gift would be the hardest part. 
But somehow, this part is a lot harder. 
Braving it anyway—because there’s ironically no time like the present—you carefully unwrap the thin package and stare at what’s inside. 
It’s a photocard. But the picture is of the five of you, one that Taehyung took with his long ass arms while the four of you huddled behind him with drinks in hand. Around its edges are stickers, hearts and stars and cute little animals. 
And it’s the most precious thing you’ve ever seen. 
You don’t even realize you’re crying until Yuri rushes over to ask if you don’t like it. 
“This is the best thing ever,” you choke out, and she smiles before laughing and tearing up, too. “I love us.” 
“We’re the best, duh.” 
“Got that right,” Dom adds to the air while Reia and Taehyung start cleaning up the wrapping scraps. “You like your first gift exchange?”
“I should’ve joined y’all sooner.” 
“Joined us?” Taehyung looks up from the ground. “What do you mean?” 
“Oh. I figured you guys do this every year.” 
Tae looks at Yuri, who then looks at you again before very seriously admitting, “We’ve never done this, either. Not with each other.” 
“Really?” 
“Yeah.” She taps the back of your now most precious, most coveted photocard ever. “We didn’t even think about it since you wouldn’t be there.” 
Smiling at your prized possession, you vow, 
“I’ll be here now.” 
Regarding all of them, you start to decorate your place in your mind. Seeing where all the lights go. Where all the little trinkets hang, or whatever. You don’t quite know how this goes just yet, but you do know there’s trees involved. So that’s gonna be figured out in a year’s time. 
“I’m not missing this again.” 
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With bellies full of laughter and a little bit of cider, you and your friends head over to Jimin’s cul-de-sac. 
Dom took the wheel this time, so you get to stare out the passenger side window, eyes reflecting golds and colors as you take in the surrounding lights. 
Were they always this pretty? You don’t remember being so taken by electricity and staggering electric bills, especially the houses that go all out and cover every nook of their yard in lights. 
But it’s a spectacle on every corner and street, and Jimin’s little half circle of houses keeps the holiday illumination alive. 
“Uhh, I think we can park down there,” you point, noticing there’s some space a little bit beyond the street. It’s alarmingly next to where Yoongi had to park once, and you cherish that memory with stars in your eyes. 
“Everyone have their gifts?” 
“Tae, if anyone lost theirs on the way here, we have other issues.” 
It’s a quick walk to Jimin’s, and the music around the house gets louder as you approach his entrance. There are people already set up in his open garage playing what you assume are card games, and everyone greets your group as you pop in to say hi. 
“Hey!” Namjoon calls. “Y’all are late! Everyone’s inside.” 
“We had our own party first,” you call out, struggling with your gift bags and food tray. “Can someone—”
Before you finish your ask, you smell nice cologne and feel a big presence at your side. 
When you look to see who’s assisting, you slow in your motions before uttering a small,
“Thank you.” 
Jungkook slightly smiles as he grabs your last bag. “Your perfume’s nice,” he compliments behind tousled bangs. Which makes you blink because that comment is more than hard to come by from him. 
So you can only grin. “Just got it,” you explain as you follow your friends inside the house. “It’s a dupe, can you believe it?” 
“Damn! It’s a good one.” 
“I know,” you agree, very proud of your find. Taking the gift bags from his hands, you tilt your head. “Can you bring the tray to the kitchen?” 
“On it.” 
When you make your way to your friends at the front area, they all eye you with concern. But you wave it off and shrug off your coat to hang on the loan coat hanger—earning teasing and whistles.   
“Shut up,” you groan, laughing with everyone before straightening the reason for the noises. It’s a dress you’ve been eyeing specifically for holiday parties. Because as soon as you started to shop for your gift exchanges, that quickly spiraled into shopping for outfits to wear to them. Did your coworker spook you into looking good because it was a public event? Maybe. Absolutely. 
So you shopped around before finding a dress that even you knew you looked good in. And the past couple weeks were the longest stretches ever because of your anticipation to wear it again. 
As you and your newest fit walk into the kitchen, you start to greet everyone, giving them hugs and smiling bright at their compliments. Because you feel good. You feel nice. Maybe you’re just drinking the holiday cheer and letting it consume you but you don’t care because it’s fun this time. This isn’t like any other year, and it’s wonderful. 
But then. 
Even the most wonderful moments have to come to a halt. 
And yours crash when you see Yoongi. 
Leaned back on one of the kitchen counters, his body appears relaxed in another damn black button-up, telltale silver chain hanging from a neck you wanna devour in front of the whole house. 
He was already annoying last year. But this time, his hair’s longer, and made up with just the right amount of disarray and a little bit even tucked behind his ear.
Fuck, this is so much worse! 
If he wasn’t so attractive and magnetizing, you’d have way less than ninety-nine problems. It would be a lot closer to zero. 
But you make your way over to him anyway, because of course you would. Of course he knew you would, too. 
“Hi,” you greet him, hands tingling with the desire to cup his beautiful chin and yank him in for a kiss. 
But he greets you back while giving you a hug, not without giving you a very obvious once-over. 
“Beautiful,” he whispers in your ear before pulling away, which can only make you babble out, 
“What?” 
He grins wide. “You look nice.” 
Oh. Oh, he really did say that. Why are you surprised? Why are you always surprised? But you have to stay poised so you stick with a neutral, 
“So do you.” 
“Thanks,” he says with a sly curve, still leaning back on the counter with a drink in hand. “Say something else.” 
“Goodbye forever,” is what you go with, back heating with his staccato laughs following your speedy retreat. 
No, no, no. He cannot notice how excited you are to give him his gift. Your bubbling excitement needs to be projected elsewhere. Because you know you picked perfect. It’s something you know he’d appreciate. 
But he cannot have his ego inflated anymore or else the house would float to the sky. 
But fucking hell, he looks damn good and he knows it. 
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After an hour or so of socializing and keeping to your little friend circle, Jimin gets everyone together in the big living room to do the exchange. 
“Okay! One, two… Okay, we’re all here, so. Who’s gonna start?” 
When someone calls his name, the man grins and shakes his head. “Nah, I’m host.” 
“So shouldn’t you be the one to start?” 
“My house, my rules!” Jimin argues with zest, pointing to the guy that dared to challenge him, “So you go first.” 
And that man just so happens to secretly be yours. 
Shouts erupt around the living room, and you can mostly hear Hoseok and Seokjin since they’re closest,
“Go, Yoong!” 
“Ah, Yoongi’s first for a change.” 
Secretly and not so secretly, you’re hoping and wishing that he pulled your name. But the odds of that would be pretty slim if you pulled him, even though it was an even chance across the board. 
But as he gets up from the arm of Jimin’s couch holding a small gift bag, you determine that maybe it’s best if he didn’t pull your name. Because you already had trouble opening Yuri’s gift. How the hell would you control yourself opening his? 
“K, uhh. I got…” 
Wait, he’s looking towards you from across the room.
Shit. Is it happening?
You? 
“Taehyung.” 
A pang of disappointment and relief shoots through your veins, even when you shout with everyone while watching Tae smile from his place right next to you.
Yoongi walks right up to your seats, which are really some extra fold-out chairs by Jimin’s decorated tree. And he smells so good. Why do you have to be close to him again? 
But this moment is about Taehyung, so you watch as he opens the gift. When there’s a small box inside the bag, he opens that to reveal a nice, slim… wallet? 
Wait, is that leather? 
Your mouth drops as everyone’s up and raising questions already, and you can clearly hear Jungkook and your brother protest the highest,  
“Wait, huh?” 
“We set a limit for a reason!” 
Yoongi’s hands stay in his pockets when he refutes, “It was on sale.” 
“Nah, he’s lying!” 
Taehyung doesn’t know what to say, so when he looks at you, it takes all your strength to encourage him neutrally, 
“It’s so you! Deserved.” 
Yoongi looks at you before asking your friend, “Is it okay?” 
“It’s perfect,” Taehyung says, full of gratefulness. “I’m just shocked.” 
Jimin and Shiv chuckle from one of the couches, 
“Oh? He’s never shocked.” 
“This is new.” 
Yoongi smiles as Tae gets up to hug him, and you’re immediately okay not being the one receiving anything right now. 
Because you don’t need anything from him. 
All you want is his happiness. 
Once the initial gift is given, everyone goes down the line. And you’re feeling a little lighter after knowing who Yoongi got. Also, you feel less and less awkward about your gift, since the chaos of Yoongi’s was only the beginning.
Because when Taehyung gifts your brother a chain, everyone’s up and yelling again while your sibling is shocked to hell. 
On one end of the living room, Namjoon shakes his grinning head while Jungkook throws his back, 
“Alright, there needs to be a penalty for the most expensive gift.” 
“We obviously didn’t give a shit about the limit.” 
Everyone’s laughter fills the house, even drowning out the faint holiday music floating from the surround speakers. 
Immediately clipping on his necklace, your brother shouts, “Am I the only one that stuck to what we agreed on?” 
“Sucks for who got yours then.” 
Everyone starts laughing or reprimanding Yoongi for saying that—you with a cackle included. 
But then your brother busts out a fucking watch for Shiv and everyone goes bananas. 
At this point, Taehyung’s fully laughing behind his fingers on his forehead, and Jimin collapses on a gawking Yoongi when Shiv quite literally jumps up. 
“What the hell? Dude, I can’t take this.” 
“Yes, you can! And you will.” 
Fingers are pointing in every direction while people are calling each other liars, and your brother laughs on like a gremlin.
But it’s all so adorable that your heart is squeezing. Shiv’s damn near tearing up. “I’ve been eyeing this one for forever.” 
“I know! You wouldn’t stop running your damn mouth about that thing.” Your older sibling claps him on the shoulder. “You can shut up now,” he says with a grin, and Shiv gives him a big hug. 
“Thanks, man.” 
“Don’t sweat it.” 
Shiv’s turn. And everyone is waiting for what he decided to gift. 
Turns out he keeps the shenanigans going by gifting Jungkook a luxury tie set.
The blond’s jaw drops as he stares hard at the package. Looking up quick, he has to ask for sure, “A set, dude?” 
“It was on sale!” 
“Again?”
“Are we all gonna say the same lie?” 
Everyone can’t hide their amusement, with creased eyes and fake annoyance in every seat. Jungkook can’t believe his luck, since he’s been telling himself to get dress clothes forever but hasn’t gotten around to it.
“You gotta dress like a man now, kid,” Shiv tells him with a bright smile. “There’s a lot coming now that you’re making it.”
A light bulb softly glows when you realize that Yoongi might need to do the same. Trying not to look obvious, you peek in his direction. 
As he stares at the floor, you already know he’s mulling over the same thoughts. 
But it’s Jungkook’s turn now, and you still haven’t gotten a gift yet. 
So you’re waiting with all the air in your lungs. 
As the blond teases his pick, the studio boys are quick to handle him as Yoongi only huffs.
“I got… I got… I got, I got, I got, I got—”
“Kook, just say it.”
“Always like this.”
“Jimin!”
Your heart beats again as the host pops up from his couch, everyone cheering as Kook meets him in the center. Around you, speculation from your friends mixed with a little laughter spikes,
“He probably stuck to the limit.”
“Definitely.”
“Jimin’s gonna be the only one left with—”
Cackles and screams rip as Jimin kicks his head back in laughter, because in his hands is a sleek white box that everyone recognizes. 
This man got Jimin designer shades.
Your cheeks hurt as you react with everyone, giddy and bubbly with how absolutely ridiculous this whole night has gone. Everyone accusing each other of cheating, while all the while every single gift has been over the top.
You really don’t feel bad about revealing your gift anymore. Quite honestly, you almost feel more bad about it not being enough.
No. It’s enough.
Yours is the best and you stick to that.  
Jimin takes the sunglasses out of the box and protective pouch, slipping them on and modeling immediately.  
Oh’s and ah’s echo before his friends inflate his ego,
“Damn, you sure you aren’t a model?” 
“You’re one step away.” 
“He really is.” 
He looks great and he knows it. And he carefully puts them back in their packaging before giving Jungkook a hug. They exchange conversation, and you can feel the latter’s smile as he laughs before sitting down. 
Suddenly, you have the strongest intuition that you’re next. On Jimin’s turn. He’s getting out a very nice bag from behind a couch and your brain is firing off. 
“Okay! The best gift is going to…”
You were right. He calls your name.
Smiling, you shakily stand as Jimin approaches, a twinkling look in those features glowing in incandescent lights. 
Eyes on you. Many eyes. 
A little overwhelmed, you thank him before sitting down. Because it’s much easier to do this while on a solid, structured surface. 
“Hope you like it.”
“I’m sure I will.”
Best gift? What could Jimin possibly mean by—
Your scream shoots out as you clamp the bag shut because no fucking way you saw what you just saw in there. 
Jimin’s laughing his ass off but it’s not funny. 
“Jimin, what the fuck!” Now you know how Shiv felt and he is absolutely valid for his reaction. “I can’t accept this.” 
People are concerned around you, and you quickly think they may have the wrong idea.
“What did he get?” 
“What’s in there?”
Quelling some thoughts, you explain, “It’s a box.” 
“Okay?” 
You just gotta say it. They’re all gonna know as soon as you take it out anyway. So you breathe out,
“…It’s Dior.” 
It’s the loudest it’s been all night, even though your friends are completely speechless. All the guys are up in arms and Jia’s scream for penalty can be heard through the chaos,
“What!” 
“Where’s my Dior?” 
“What the fuck?” 
“Jimin…” 
“Okay, that is way over limit! That’s cheating!” 
“Penalty!” 
Jimin’s sneaky smile as he turns around doesn’t help, “You know I get everything for less.” 
“So?”
“Still, what the hell, man!”
You know Jimin works there. You do. But this is still making your limbs jelly and you can’t even speak. 
There’s no way Dior is passed around at every gift exchange. 
“You deserve it. For dealing with him.” He looks at your brother, but the look in his eyes is too sparkly to be completely truthful. Does he mean Yoongi? Or is he being serious? 
Of course, your sibling throws out a droning, “Wow.” 
After lots of shaky unboxing, you reveal a stunning bracelet, your friends bending down around you to gawk at how brilliant it is. Dancing in your fingers, this piece shimmers and gleams, and every single person is quiet. 
Guilt. You feel guilt. 
And you can’t even look at the reason why.
“Whatever you’re feeling, don’t. It’s okay.” 
You’re tearing up because it’s way too nice. Which proves worse because you also feel bad for crying for the sole fact that Yoongi’s watching. You don’t want him to get the wrong idea. 
You get up to hug him. “I… This is really nice, Jimin. Thank you.” 
“Stop by the store sometime,” he offers with a smile. “Maybe I can slip more in your purse.” 
“Easy,” your brother eyes him. 
“So are we all getting fancy gifts or what?” 
“Nope! Ran out of my discount, sorry.” 
“Wow.” 
When you finally glance around, everyone’s either a mix of shock and awe, visibly confused, or just jealous and wondering what the hell just happened. 
Meanwhile. 
Yoongi straight up looks like he’s holding his tongue. 
And you suddenly feel really bad. 
Hopefully giving him his gift will make up for what just happened. Even though you’re going after the hardest hitter of the damn night, this one’s special. 
But who are you kidding? People are definitely gonna talk in private about Jimin’s little gift. 
So now you have to try and mend this while acting like Yoongi’s just your brother’s friend. Cool. Awesome. 
“So...”
Just try your goddamned best. 
“Yoongi is mine.”
…Wait.
Your secret looks your way immediately while everyone snaps their heads to him.
What the fuck did you say?
Wait wait wait wait what did you fucking say?
Flapping your arms, you reach for words while everyone starts teasing, “Oh, god. I mean—I have Yoongi—I mean, wow. Hold on.”
Fucking fuck fuck, he’s grinning.
Thank the lord above for someone cheekily asking,
“First time at a gift exchange?”
You look away from the laughs while trying to compose your grin of embarrassment. Get it the fuck together, this is peak time to get it right.
“God. Okay.” You look down at your bag. All of its carefully folded and primped paper, the delicate folding inside. “For the gift exchange,” you clarify with a forced firm tone, “I got Yoongi.” 
You feel Dom try her damned best to hide her laugh. And you know for damn sure Jimin and Taehyung are thoroughly amused right now. 
All the oh’s sounding off in the living room are already enough to set your ears smoking. Your brother’s voice can be heard, but you know that’s for a specific reason. 
Everything had to be carefully calculated, after all. 
You walk up to him, and you cannot—absolutely cannot—look too long at the way he’s looking up at you. Him sitting in any capacity is enough to drive you up a wall, but now? When he looks so freshly fitted and prepping to tease you about all this later? You can barely think straight. 
“I don’t think I can beat Jimin’s gift,” you sigh to his curious eyes. “But it’s a little too late to change.”
His smile turns so soft. He shouldn’t be the one comforting you right now when you probably broke a little of his heart. “It’s all good.”
Keep going. 
Cleaning your clogged throat, you brave the crowd and breathe before starting again, “Anyway. This is kinda from both of us, but I picked it because I have better taste.”
“Hey, what the hell?” 
Ignoring your brother’s protest, you watch as Yoongi softly opens the gift before pulling out a basketball jersey. 
Of his favorite player. 
“Holy shit.” 
Shouts start erupting behind your back as you laugh, your sneaky gift joining the rest of them. 
“Hello? That’s way too much!” 
“That’s over the limit for sure.” 
You wave your hands frantically among their teasing arguments, and your brother chimes in on your side. “I didn’t know what to get!” 
“So you got a real jersey?” 
“Relax, y’all. It’s from both of us.” 
“Wait, which one’s Lillard again?” 
“Damian,” Yoongi softly says in awe. “How’d you know?” 
You can only blink, smiling faltering by the slightest amount.
Fuck, he’s gonna be cheeky right now? Knowing you know and exactly how you know? Cuddled up with him in his bed as he shows you highlight reels and tells you the guy’s whole story and that he happens to be a rapper, too? 
Looking back towards your brother, you explain, “Well... He gave me a list. And I just picked off vibes.” 
Yoongi’s eyes sparkle so much when he grins. “Good choice,” he compliments with creased eyes. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome!” You say back with a little too high of a pitch. “But tell him he still owes you a gift. This doesn’t count for him.” 
“Uhh, it sure as fuck does!” 
Yoongi breaks eye contact to shout behind you, “Didn’t you already tell me you got me something?” 
“Yeah, it was that!” 
“What a lie,” Yoongi says through a smile.
“Yeah, I did,” your brother surrenders. “The shoes are in my bag. Okay, next!” 
Hilariously, two pairs of people end up getting each other. Yuri’s older sister Jia got Seokjin, who also drew her name—to the slight angst of your brother, you imagine. 
And Hoseok ends up getting Namjoon. Which turns out being twice as funny because they both got each other the same pair of earphones. You can’t breathe with how hard you cackle with everyone, and your heart skips when you catch a glimpse of Yoongi’s eyes across the room.
By the end of the exchange, everyone’s bellies and cheeks sting from laughter, and every eye in sight has twinkles embedded inside.
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Throughout the night, everyone starts branching off into different groups. You and your friends talk in the kitchen, and both in and out of the house, there’s groups of games and conversations. 
The holiday decorations everywhere shine bright. Enveloped in the music, you keep looking at the lights, feeling happy but a little bittersweet. 
You really wanna set the record straight with Yoongi. You had no damn clue that Jimin was gonna give something like that, much less in front of everyone. 
The fact that you haven’t been in the same room for a bit makes it worse. What could he be thinking right now? You can’t tell because he’s nowhere in sight. 
Screw it. You’re gonna at least text him. There’s no way you can survive the night if you’re gonna plague your own head without checking in with him. 
Fishing out your phone, you sidestep away for a second to type something quick. 
You [10:38pm]: i know it’s not dior.. but hope you like your gift :’)) 
Yoongi [10:38pm]: You know I do. It’s perfect, doll. 
Well. He texted back super quick.
Maybe he’s really okay? Maybe he and Jimin already talked it through? 
Then again.. Yoongi didn’t look happy at all during the big reveal. To the point where he was actively showing emotions you rarely get to see.
But if he says he likes his gift, that’s a good sign. 
You [10:42pm]: i can’t believe jimin did that
Yoongi [10:42pm]: That was bold. 
You [10:42pm]: seriously!!! 
Hmm. So he didn’t know. That’s even more surprising than him knowing, now that you think about it. 
You’re called over to get another round of food, and you turn down the initial invite but stay around as they get more to eat. 
When you see a tray that smells way too good, you do break and get a piece anyways. 
“Yeah, those are amazing,” Yuri chirps. “Shiv made those.”
“Really?” Dom grabs a couple pieces. “Lemme try these then.”
“You’re gonna want more.” 
As you find a place outside to eat, you stand next to the heater while conversing with Taehyung. It’s adorable how you can tell how excited he is about his gift, turning it in his hand before pocketing the leather again. 
“It’s so nice,” you compliment. 
“He knows how to pick, I guess,” Tae smiles, looking at you and making you shy. Because hello? There’s no way he’s gonna be bringing that up tonight. 
When you silently mouth for him to shut up, he grins like a madman. Glancing down at your hands, he suddenly asks, “Are you gonna put that down?”
“No,” you say with a tiny pang of guilt. “Afraid not.”
“Mm.” 
Your phone buzzes again, and you’re thankful for the interruption.
Yoongi [11:09pm]: Guess I have to do better😔
Instantly, you take that gratefulness back.
You [11:09pm]: NO!! you don’t have to worry about me at all
Yoongi [11:10pm]: I can’t lose to you
You [11:10pm]: trust me, i just… 
You think about sending the other text or not. But you do anyway. 
Taehyung sees the look in your faraway face, but doesn’t comment as you peer down again. 
You [11:11pm]: i just wanna see you happy
That’s all you want. If he’s happy, you’re happy. So it sucks to have part of the night come as quite the shock. 
Interestingly enough, though.. Someone else in the house should also be pretty upset about your gift, and you haven’t seen Jimin cornered by him yet. 
Unless your brother is just deciding to be courteous and beat his ass after everyone leaves. 
Yoongi [11:13pm]: Then come over here
You’re not gonna argue with that. 
So when your friends finish their plates, you suggest you all head into the garage. It’s already rowdy before you open the door, so the sounds get booming loud when you all enter. 
Looks like everyone is blowing their money on other things tonight, too. The gifts were the nice part of the party; now everyone is fiending to take everyone’s cash.
“Damn, Yoongi’s clearing me out.”
“Told you not to go all in.”
“He did.”
As the cold weather rolls in, you watch as the games go on, with heaters humming with energy and your brother’s friends radiating competition. 
No wonder Yoongi wanted you in here.
He’s on a damn roll.
As everyone groans after another win, Namjoon and your brother are in tatters, 
“Yoong, what the fuck!”
“You hiding cards in those sleeves?”
“I told you!” Yoongi boasts, “Don’t get too cocky.”
“Says him.”
“Cocky, my ass.” 
When you laugh, you earn a tiny glimpse of his eyes. But as his vision falls to your hands, you’re quick to look away, out into the night to look at all the lights instead.
Shit.
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After some time passes, you find yourself alone on a balcony. Yet again. Cold wind blows through your coat, chilling you but making you feel alive. Too alive in this moment. Too aware.
The holidays aren’t so bad this time around. But you do need to set this one thing straight before things go a little sideways with Yoongi. 
If he’s upset, you don’t want him to be. Even if he doesn’t say it, you want him to know you’re considering his feelings. There’s some things you just can’t control.
So you wait for Jimin, telling him earlier to meet you up here for the best chance at privacy.
When you hear the door opening, you see him come through, hair lifting in the breeze and his lips in a slight curve. 
Get right to it. “Jimin, I—”
“Isn’t it so nice tonight?” 
Stopping, you settle into a smile, watching him walk up to stand next to you before you both look into the night. The neighborhood glows beneath your feet, and everyone in the backyard mingles while puffs of air leave their lips. 
“It really is,” you say with a smile, clutching the gift bag in cold fingers. Because you haven’t let go of it ever since it was given to you—it’s way too expensive. You’ve been guarding it all night. 
Which is why you need to hand it back to the one who gave it to you. “We haven’t done something like this before, so.. It’s a nice change of pace.” 
Jimin turns before realizing something. “Oh. I meant the weather.” 
Embarrassed, you let out a laugh while his eyes crease. “Ah. That, too.” 
“Got deep real fast.” 
“Jimin!” 
Both of you puff out laughter as you look down, just in time to see someone gazing right up at you. Someone that makes your heart squeeze on sight. 
Oh, shit. Is he gonna get the wrong idea again? 
You need to do this quick. Yoongi can’t be let down more than once tonight. 
Sighing, you start to hold up the bag again. “Thank you—”
“He’s lucky you came around when you did.” 
“Huh?” 
Jimin leans on the railing before eyeing you with a smile. “You don’t even know, do you.” 
“I don’t…” When you look below, Yoongi’s not looking anymore. And you panic. “Jimin, thank you. But I seriously can’t take this.” 
Why does he look so calm? Why does he keep acting like this isn’t a big deal? “You can.” 
“No, really. I—” 
“I may have gone too far this time.” 
Your eyes still as you breathe out a confused, “...What?” 
Jimin’s face is dusted with peach in the cold, and you get a good view of his jawline as he peers down below with a regretful curve. “I kinda tricked him,” he admits. “Into picking your gift for the exchange.” 
The shock you feel prevents you from even blinking. How the hell can this get even more overwhelming? “What do you mean?” 
“I wasn’t lying when I said I got some good discounts.” Jimin turns around to lean against the railing. “So I thought it would be fun to rope him into getting you something.” 
When he laughs to the chilly night sky, you don’t join him—the shock is preventing you from doing anything. 
“Didn’t think he’d pick a whole bracelet, though. Made for one hell of a gift exchange pick.” He looks at you at a tilt. “You like it, right?” 
Even if Yoongi was the one to pick out the jewelry, Jimin still had to purchase the damn thing. And even with his discount, it’s still expensive as hell. It has to be. You haven’t let go of the bag once because you don’t want to lose it. “But you still had to pay,” you blurt out. “I’ll find a way to pay you back if you aren’t gonna take it.”
“I didn’t pay for it, either.” 
Your heart stops. 
Full on halts. 
When he turns his head, he looks toward the sky in thought. “Well, I did secretly pay the exchange limit. But..” He straightens before staring back at your absolute silence, dropping the biggest surprise of the whole night,
“Yoongi paid the difference.”
The sudden sob that leaves your throat startles him immediately, and he rushes forward to put hands on your shoulders. “Hey, hey, you okay?”
“Yeah, I just—”
The sound of a door slides open, and you turn to see your favorite, favorite, favorite person walking through. You must look like a wreck but you don’t care, don’t care, don’t care. 
“I’ll leave you both to it then,” Jimin says to your watery eyes before squeezing, heading out to give you both the quiet space you need. 
But Yoongi clutches his arm as he walks by, and you hold your breath as he stares him in the eye, voice burning with a steady glow,
“Don’t pull that shit again.” 
“I know,” Jimin agrees without pause. “I owe you one.” 
“No one comes up here then.” Yoongi releases him slow. “Until I come back down.” 
The host of the night shares a quick hand clutch before assuring, “You got it.” 
Bag clutched tight in your hands, you watch in wonder as Yoongi approaches you with a quiet determination. His presence alone makes your heart beat warm and soft, but you cannot stop the tears from flowing down your cheeks. 
All you can ask as he gets close is a wondrous, “Why..?”
“He’s a very persuasive salesman.” When you wipe your eyes, he helps with a little look of tenderness. Though there’s still some frustration evident in his features. “But I didn’t know it would be for tonight.”
“Oh, shit,” you sigh. “Why did he do that?” 
“I’m not sure.” Yoongi holds your chin, rubbing your frosty cheek with a handworking thumb. “Taehyung didn’t know he’d do it, either.” 
“Tae knew, too?” 
“Yeah. He thought I had it, not Chim.” He sighs to the side, hair lifting slightly in the breeze. “I almost stood up when you screamed.” 
Your heart shrugs off some chill. “Really?” 
Yoongi nods before looking up with scrunched brows. “It took all of me to keep my ass down. Honestly, I’m still pissed the fuck off.” 
You believe that. One hundred percent, you believe that. Because you’ve never seen him talk to Jimin like that before tonight. 
Reaching to cradle one of his cheeks, you feel how cold he is before whispering to soothe, “Tell me how you wanted it to go.” 
When Yoongi looks at you, your lips curve into a small smile. Peppered with a bit of your tears and willingness to make him feel better. 
He softly grips your hand on his face before turning to kiss your fingers. Voice low, he reveals, “I was gonna take you straight to dinner. After you got off work one day.” Another set of kisses makes your fingers both hot and cold. “Then I would’ve faked needing something from the studio. And you would’ve gotten it there.” 
“Oh…” You blink as your vision blurs. “That’s…” 
“Among other things.” 
At his suggestive look, you playfully pat his jacket. But your heart starts leaking from your eyes.  
Because you just want it all to be out already. Just everything. Everything, everything, everything, you’re so tired of keeping it under wraps. 
“What’s wrong, doll.”
“Nothing,” you sob. “I’m just… I didn’t know, and… This is a lot.” 
You’re overflowing with emotions. From all the experiences you’ve had tonight to this very moment, everything has been wonderful and magical and there’s nothing quite like this feeling. But you’re also so embarrassed because he definitely brought out much bigger guns than you did. 
Sniffling into his jacket, you whisper, “Thank you… You got me something timeless. This is so much cooler than my gift.” 
“No! Yours is great, are you kidding me?” 
“It’s a jersey… That’s much less cool.” 
“Mm... You also called me yours.” When you freeze completely, Yoongi's shoulders bob with his pride. “Gotta say, that was the highlight of the night."
“Oh, shut up!" When you groan into his clothes, you feel him laughing through his chest. And it's one of your favorite feelings in the world.
Shoulders slumped, you heavily yearn,
“I want it all out now. Everything.” You squeeze him closer. Closer, closer, closer. “I want everyone to know it was from you.” 
Yoongi doesn’t say anything, though you do feel his heart beat a little faster. When he finally answers, you close your eyes. “I know I said this last time, but.. Next year. For sure.” 
“Can we decorate, too?” 
Yoongi looks into your starry eyes. “You wanna?” When your nod is quick, he laughs. “Guess I don’t have a real choice then, huh?” 
“Nu uh.” You squeal as he hauls you into a full kiss, squeezing you in his arms and more tears out of your eyes. “Wait!” 
When he tilts his head, you grin at his adorable quirk. “Let’s do it anyway.” 
“Huh?”
Holding up the bag, you cheekily suggest, “Everything you said. Let’s do it.” Biting your lip and feeling the chill on your ears, you finish, “There’s a new place I wanna try with you anyways.” 
Yoongi just stares, smile unsure but huffing amusement from his nose. “You sure?” 
“Duh! And I’ll act even more surprised, just for you.” 
Your giggling is purely born from excitement. Because you can’t wait to take him somewhere you know he’ll enjoy, too. And you get to see the studio? It’s gonna be a fantastic—
You’re brought into a tight hug before your thoughts finish. The bag between you crumples a tad, but you’re more focused on the way your head is moved for a soul-tying kiss. 
Warmth and gold and sparkles burst from your chest as you’re completely taken by Yoongi’s lips, and you start to feel your house inside change. It’s festive. It’s decorated. It’s made just for you and him. 
You've never been one for this season. But getting to spend it with Yoongi two years in a row? It's becoming one of your favorite times of the year.
“I just…” he murmurs to your features before gripping you close. “Thanks, babe.” 
“Thank you,” you whisper into his handsome features. “Once you give it to me for real, I’m gonna wear it everywhere.” 
“Please do. Get my money’s worth.” 
When you both laugh, your affection leaves in puffs of white. And you give him a more tender kiss than the first. 
You feel so at home it hurts. But it hurts because your heart is so full you can’t fit it all. All the love for everyone that fills that hole in your life that you and your brother have had for years. 
You’re gonna tell him one day. And it’s gonna rip you apart. 
But you hope everything will be okay. This time next year, all of you will be okay. More than okay. 
When you lean in close, you whisper something you’ve never really said to anyone. But you’re gonna try to start, even if you aren’t quite familiar with it yet. It’s a good year to start, start, start. 
“Happy holidays, Yoongi.”
His lips spread slow before giving one more kiss to your chilly nose. And every anxious feeling floats away in the frosty breeze.
“Happy holidays, doll.”
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fin. :)
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so... how did it go! | join the server! | join the taglist!
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a/n: happy holidays, merry christmas, happy new year to everyone that celebrates! just wanted to get this one out for the ones needing a little bit of cheer around this time. we learn quite a bit about some of the crew's backstories and where they work now, huh. is this a pocket universe, too? who really knows! but it all flew out of my fingers as soon as we got the suggestion, so thank you again to that anon message! a/n 2: thank you to everyone that's stuck with me and 3tan this year. it's been a rough one, but i also wanted to post this one to let you all know i'm still here. 3tan will forever stay with me, and i have not ever forgotten it. not one day goes by where i don't think about it, or y'all, or them. trust me. also, stay on the lookout for some physical copy interest checks! we are getting closer and closer to 3tan copies being A Real Thing! ++ feedback box: ⇥ of course, any reblogs/comments/messages are appreciated! ⇥ for the ones that are too shy to reblog with a review, comment on this, or send a message, i went ahead and made another anonymous form where you can send in what you think! ⇥ no emails collected, no need to put in a username. it’s literally just a comment dropbox :D feedback can be as short/sweet or as long as you’d like! ⇥ here! ++ more links: ⇥ masterlist  ⇥ three tangerines masterlist
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cherryblooom · 2 days ago
Text
2XL — OP81 [ part 1 ]
Summary: You are a young artist who gained a lot of popularity at the ripped age of 14 due to your talent and unusual style. Your body is considered "voluminous" so, in public, you only use 2XL clothing, to protect yourself from people on the internet and feel more comfortable while performing. You have managed to keep your personal life outside the spotlight but when Oscar finally made it to the glamorous lifestyle of motorsports, everything changed.
Pairing: Oscar Piastri x Reader
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Fic warning: best friends to lovers, slut shaming, weird people on the internet, people commenting about a minor's body, sexism, rape comments, rape "jokes", reader battles with her self-esteem, self-image, and self-love, Oscar is obsessed with his girlfriend and her body (not in a creepy way) and is not afraid of showing it, Oscar is not afraid of defending reader and dragging people though the mud.
Faceclaim: Billie Eilish
Note: Oscar is a year older than the reader. SMAU mixed with narrative. Reader doesn't have that much access to social media right now as they are mostly controlled by their management.
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You were in shock, appalled, shaking in your boots. No, that wasn't enough to describe the excitement you felt when you saw the success your debut song was having. It had gone viral on the Soundcloud platform, and your followers were increasing rapidly, it honestly felt like a dream.
ynusername just posted
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Liked by oscarpiastri, fanusername and 2,013 others
ynusername Thank you so much for all the support and love you guys have shown to my debut song and EP. I am still in shock and shaking. I can't wait to see what comes next 🩵
View all 1,578 comments
fanusername you deserve all the love, the songs are beautiful
→ ynusername Thank you so much for the support, it is a dream come true 🩵
oscarpiastri beautiful and talented, you deserve it! ☁︎🩵
ynusername has liked your comment
username this girl is going to be a fucking star
ynusername has liked your comment
username245 ocean eyes makes me cry so much 😭
oscarpiastri just posted
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oscarpiastri I can't even begin to express how proud I am of you. You are such a talented artist and seeing how you are achieving all of your dreams makes me so excited. And…happy birthday! I don't care how famous you get, i’ll always remember how you almost die because you couldn't stop eating grapes.
Please don't forget me when you are famous, I can't live without your pancakes and you always REFUSE to share the recipe 😔
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ynusername and i’ll NEVER give you my pancakes recipe ☺️🙂‍↔️
→ oscarpiastri boooh, u are just mean and for what😣
ynusername just posted
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ynusername This pookie just won his first championship in motorsports and I'm still scared to cross the street alone, wtf. Anyways, CONGRATULATIONS!! I don't need to read your horoscope to know that you have a great and bright future ahead of you ❤️@ oscarpiastri
P.S. I understand that winning a championship is a bit of a big deal, but I'm not going to give you my pancake recipe. I don't care how pretty your eyes are 🙄
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fan1 wait, are they a couple?
→ fanuser3 No, as far we know, they have only been best friends since kids
randomuser oscar had an amazing season, I can't wait to see him in f1
fanuser2 Is Yn that tiny or is Oscar a giant? 😭
→ fan1 I know, their height difference is so cute 😔
→ fan3 both answers are correct 😂 but she's 5’1 so I would say that is not that hard to tower over her
Oscarpiastri if you give me the recipe, I will teach you how to cross the street without dying 😃
→ ynusername no❤️
→ oscarpiastri oh COME ON
→ oscarpiastri then, can you come and prepare me some? I pledge not to peek
→ ynusername that I can do
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Oscar turned off the screen of his phone when he saw that you had returned from the bathroom, since he had taken advantage of those minutes that you were away from the table to respond to that disgusting comment on Twitter. There were times when he hated social networks, and because he was not a fan and did not find the logic in arguing with a stranger on Twitter, he could not avoid the anger that began to feel when he saw that comment from someone who claimed to be his fan. It wasn't the first time, and unfortunately it wouldn't be the last, that your fashion style was the center of conversation, and not in a good way.
“So, are we done here then? Nobody wants to order anything else?” asked his team leader. All the team members shook their heads and after the bill was paid, everyone started to get into the cars that were already waiting outside to take them to the bar they had reserved for the rest of the night. It wasn’t just that they had won the championship but now Oscar was officially of age, so it was also a reason to celebrate (although he wasn’t old enough to drink alcohol yet, but it seems that detail wasn’t that important to his team).
“Let’s go to McDonald’s for our monthly greasy burger” Oscar told you as you walked out of the restaurant. Your arms were intertwined, and your head was resting on his chest as the two of you slowly made your way to the exit. You couldn’t help but feel a warm flush running through your body. You felt so comfortable and safe.
''Even though I wouldn't want to break our tradition, you should go with your team to celebrate. I'm sure they made you a cake or something like that.'' Since you were both 12 years old, on the last Friday of every month you would go somewhere to eat sweets, junk food or things that you couldn't eat on a daily basis and, for both of you, it was almost a sacred day where you could be yourself, spend time together and just eat, talk or relax.
"Maybe you're right but honestly I'd rather spend time with you."
''I'd love to accompany you but I'm not 18 yet''
''Ohh right, you're still a little girl, I almost forgot. My bad''
''Shut up!'' Oscar just laughed and you let him guide you to his car. ''So, you're not going to the bar?''
''I told you; I prefer to be with you.'' You were both already inside the car and after buckling his seatbelt, Oscar leaned over you to put your seatbelt on for you, but you didn't realize how close you were from each other until he was practically right in front of you. Time felt like it had stopped, or at least it was going slower, since you felt like you had been in that same position for minutes. Oscar for his part couldn't help but run his gaze over your full, kissable and pink lips. For Oscar, you had always been a beauty that didn't need makeup, and if you had put on any, it would only be to make your already natural beauty shine. A few inches were all that separated your lips from his and Oscar smiled cheekily as he watched you hold your breath, maybe waiting, but waiting for what exactly? Oscar pursed his mouth into a satisfied smile.
Oscar finished fastening your seatbelt and sat back down to his seat as if nothing had happened, but he smiled mischievously when he watched you wipe the palms of your hands on your pants and felt you release the breath you were holding.
“I don’t know what’s wrong with that belt, but sometimes it gets stuck. I should check it out later,” Oscar said, and you nodded you head accepting his explanation. It was a lie. The belt was perfect, he just wanted an excuse to do what he did and yes, he didn’t regret anything. He got the answer he was looking for...that he wasn’t the only one who felt that way.
dailyop81 just posted
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liked f1gossip, dailyf4news and 250 more
dailyop81 One of the photos that are already coming out of Oscar's team celebrating the championship title, but he doesn't appear in any of them. Could it be that he didn't attend his own party?
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dailyynupdates just posted
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dailyynupdates yn and oscar hanging out today. According to the person who took the photos, the two were seen leaving a food store with a couple of bags (with snacks and what it looked like some junk food). They stopped at the park for a few seconds and then oscar started chasing yn while they both laughed. It should be noted that today is Oscar's celebration party, and he apparently decided to celebrate with yn.
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oscarpiastri just posted
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oscarpiastri such a lovely night with a pretty girl 🩵
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yn_global23 the height difference between them, I can't-
→ ynhater1 she looks like a fucking midget besides him, how is that cute? lol
→ ynhater1 and btw, the only reason she's famous is because she is with Oscar, if not, she would have flopped so hard 🤣
→ yn_global23 you are aware that yn was already famous before your little vroom vroom guy won any silly tittle, right?
Oscarpiastri liked your comment ❤️
fanuser5 Oh, the way I would give my left kidney to see them together! Like TOGETHER 🙂‍↕️
Oscarpiastri liked your comment
→ ynfan2 ong, me too!! I don't know a lot about Oscar but yn seems so comfortable and happy whenever they are together
→ ynuser2 omggg, Oscar liked your comment 😭
→ fanuser5 WHAT? I can't see it.
→ ynfanuser4 I think he removed the like but, we all saw it. @oscarpiastri explain 🫠
Oscarpiastri liked your comment ❤️
→ ynfanuser4 ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?
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Radio check: I'm finishing up the next part of Enchanted, but this came to my mind, and I couldn't get it out of my head so here we are. If you'd like me to tag you, let me know. Like and Reblog if you like it!
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harrycinnamonbun · 3 days ago
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christmas day - oscar piastri
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oscar piastri x fem!reader
word count - 1.2k
summary - opening presents on christmas morning with bf oscar
warnings - kissing, mostly fluff!
a/n - this is short and super late but merry christmas to those who celebrate! I feel like bf oscar is great at gift giving, lily sure is lucky :)
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everything was perfect.
you got up early to make breakfast, unable to contain your excitement for the day. you've loved christmas ever since you were a little girl, and this year was no different. but this year, you got to open presents with your boyfriend. 
he was perfect. sweet, kind, attentive, passionate– everything you’ve ever wanted. you'd been dating for a little over 6 months now, right in that sweet spot of newfound love and genuine commitment. for your first christmas together, you agreed on small gifts. nothing fancy or extravagant, you had your entire lives for that. this first christmas was meant for something meaningful, a testament to your relationship.
you flip the eggs over, frying them the way oscar likes, squinting as the sun shines through the windows of the spacious monaco apartment. your bare feet padded across the tile floor as you grabbed some slices of bread to toast. the only other sound you could hear was the crackling of the eggs in the pan. 
this was much unlike the christmases you were used to, which were usually blanketed in snow, but it was a welcome change. it was still quiet out, the city still waking slowly to find presents placed under their trees. the tree in oscar’s apartment had been a bit sad before you spruced it up. its branches were occupied by just a few homemade ornaments from oscar’s childhood, but that was it. it was still low–key by all means, but more worthy of being called a christmas tree now with the addition of some ribbon and shiny ornaments. and of course you added a star, one of your grandmother’s heirlooms that had finally made its way to you. it now sat perched atop the tree like a regal crown. 
the bedroom door opened with a low creak, as a sleepy oscar stepped out with a smile.
“good morning love, merry christmas!” he said sweetly, walking over to the kitchen to place a kiss on your cheek. you leaned into his warm touch as he wrapped his arms around your waist and embraced you from behind, inhaling his scent. oscar radiated warmth, and creases lined his cheeks, evidence of his deep sleep. 
“eat first, then we open presents.” you slid a plate filled with bacon, eggs, toast, and a croissant over to him as he sat down at the table. 
“presents? i already have everything i want.” he looked up at you cheekily, already digging into his breakfast. “mmm wow this is good. thanks babe,” he moaned out as he chewed his food, a  stupidly big smile on his face already.
you rolled your eyes and brought your own plate to the table, sitting across from him. your feet touched his innocently under the table, your fluffy socks meeting his as you sat eating in comfortable silence. anticipation was palpable between the two of you, oscar making it glaringly obvious by shoveling his food in his mouth as fast as possible. you took it a bit easier, knowing there was no rush to get the day started. 
you took your last bite and oscar snatched the empty plate from under you, taking the dirty dishes straight to the sink. 
“okay okay time for presents.” he yanked your chair out from the table and pushed you off it, scooping you up to carry you to the tree.
“oscar! let me down!” you giggled as he set you down in front of the tree, placing a pretty gift bag in front of you. you gave him a look as you handed him two gift wrapped boxes, raising your eyebrows as you beamed. 
“okay baby, open yours first.” you say and look at him expectantly. he eagerly ripped open the wrapping paper of the first box, clawing it off excitedly. a flat white box remained, but as he opened the top, a picture frame sat inside.
inside the picture frame was a few pieces of confetti from his first win in hungary earlier this year. a small gold plaque as the bottom read “osc’s first win 2024”. 
oscar looked up at you, clearly at a loss for words. his eyes conveyed an intense love and gratitude, which was then confirmed with a bear hug. 
“i love it baby, this is perfect. thank you so much love i can’t wait to hang it up.” he breathed out as he suffocated you in his arms, clutching so hard you could almost see stars. 
you pulled him back the moment he let go, immediately kissing him on the lips sweetly. he held you close, kissing you softly until you both had to break away to breathe. 
“i can’t believe you kept the confetti,” he whispered.
“of course i did. we needed something to remember that special day.” you pulled him in for another hug and then sat back down across from him. “you have one more thing,” you gesture to the second box. 
he ripped the paper off just as fast as the first, and inside the box was a variety of australian candies and snacks, the good stuff you couldn’t find in monaco. oscar’s eyes widened, and so did his grin, a childlike wonderment and joy taking over him. 
“i can’t find these anywhere here!” he exclaimed, holding up a box of tim tams. he leaned over to hug you again, kissing you on the cheek. “what a great surprise.” 
“open yours now…” he said, setting down the box of treats to watch you intently. you pick up the bag and take out the tissue paper. inside was a rabbit stuffed animal, and a small velvet box. 
“you got me a jellycat!” you squealed with joy, taking out the plushie first. “its adorable baby, how did you know ive been wanting one?”
“you talk about it every single day.” oscar deadpanned, as smile threatening to break his facade as he teased you. you rolled your eyes at him and went to hug him, but he put his hand out to stop you, “open the next one.”
you set the rabbit plushie down and gently grasped the velvet box, opening the top of it. inside was a golden heart shaped locket, with yours and oscar’s initials engraved in swirling script on the front. your mouth fell open in awe, tears threatening to spill from your eyes at the sight. it was beautiful and dainty, exactly something you would wear. you opened the locket to find a note in oscar's handwriting inside which read, “i love you.”
when reading that, you started to cry softly. it was the most lovely present you had received in a very long time. “I….i love it…i love you…” you stammered out breathlessly, unable to keep a stupid grin off your face. 
oscar pulled you into his lap, wrapping his arms around you and kissing your forehead to comfort you. “I mean it, i love you so much,” he said sincerely, taking the locket from you and fastening it around your neck. 
you embraced each other warmly, soaking in the memory of your first christmas together in monaco. it had turned out better than you could ever imagine, and you were more in love than ever now.
it was perfect. the moment was perfect. this christmas was perfect. 
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mysteryshoptls · 1 day ago
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SSR Jade Leech - Room Relaxation Vignette
"Happy Birthday"
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[Mostro Lounge]
Jade: …I see. I've grasped the information you've just brought me. I shall inform Azul about it immediately.
Jamil: Seriously. Why'd I have to be the one stuck coming all the way to the Mostro Lounge to deliver the Headmage's message?
Jade: Heh, my sincerest apologies. I'm afraid our esteemed manager likes to scold us if we are on our phones during work.
Jamil: And what's that manager of yours doing, anyway? If I could've just been able to get in contact with him, I wouldn't have had to come all the way here.
Jade: He is conducting business in the VIP Room. I'm sure he's turned off his phone so as to not be rude to his guest.
Jade: Although, I suppose it's a shame. I rather would have had you come tomorrow instead of today, Jamil-san.
Jamil: Tomorrow? Is there something going on tomorrow? …No, nevermind. Forget I asked.
Jade: ACTUALLY, YOU SEE! It is our birthday tomorrow.
Jamil: Whew. I was a little worried as to what it could've been… But yeah, I guess it is your guys' birthday tomorrow.
Jamil: Good thing I came today, then.
Jamil: Who knows what'd you two'd be bugging me about if I actually came on the day of.
Jade: I would never bug you… I would have been content with a simple birthday greeting.
Jamil: Yeah, sure. Though I'm pretty sure your brother wouldn't let me slide with just a few words.
Jamil: Maybe I should prepare something ahead of time before things get dicey… Alright then, I'll be heading back now.
Jamil: Thanks for passing on the message to Azul. And… Have a good birthday.
Jade: Of course, thank you very much.
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Jade: We look forward to serving you again. Please return home safely.
Jade: Phew, it seems all the customers have finally left. Today was yet another successfully busy day.
Jade: Now then, everyone, I leave cleaning of the lounge to you all. I'll go take stock of inventory…
[Octavinelle Student A appears]
Jade: Oh? I'm pretty sure your duty station was in the kitchen was it not? You should be starting to close everything down, why are you here in the lounge?
Jade: Floyd should be in the kitchen today, as well. Don't come to me if you've made him ang... [Octavinelle Student A speaks] Eh? Floyd got bored and left?
Jade: Well then, I suppose I'll head towards the kitchen. I'll leave it to all of you to finish cleaning the lounge.
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[Octavinelle Dorm – Jade's Room]
[Floyd speaks]
Jade: Ah, Floyd. Because you left as you did, the kitchen was in such disarray.
[Floyd speaks]
Jade: …Oh my, you saw through me immediately.
Jade: Everyone finished their tasks quite efficiently after I kindly spoke with them.
[Floyd speaks]
Jade: Heh, it seems I'll be able to take my time to enjoy my little hobbies today. I'll have to be quick with my shower.
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Jade: Now…
Jade: What should I start with tonight?
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[Octavinelle Dorm – Jade's Room]
Jade: First, I'll check up on my terrariums… Ah no, the moss is starting to dry out.
Jade: I should water it well. I'll pour some water into the spray bottle, and…
[spray, spray]
Jade: …This looks fine enough. The moss is looking good and moist.
Jade: It looks almost completely different from when it was dried up… Fufu, I don't think I could ever get tired of observing moss like this.
Jade: …......
Jade: …AH, WH-WHAT'S THIS!?
Jade: The rock that I had been carefully observing for so long… It's covered in some green substance that I'm sure wasn't there this morning!
Jade: This color, this shape…!! It looks very similar to what I saw on page 487 of my Moss Encyclopedia.
[slams book open]
Jade: "When dry, the fronds become as spindly as thread; when moist, they take on a unique appearance."
Jade: "This moss is exceedingly rare, and as such the exact location and environment most suitable for growth is not well known."
Jade: Aah… As I expected…! It was absolutely worth observing this flora, without knowing if it was even a type of moss or not.
Jade: Look here, Floyd! I've obtained a rare species of moss!
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[Floyd flips a page in his book]
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Jade: He's… Reading, I see. It is a shame that I cannot share this exciting occasion with him, but I suppose I shouldn't press it today.
Jade: It would truly be regrettable if I brought about his ire and he damaged this rare specimen in the process.
Jade: Oh yes, I cannot just leave it like this. I should take a picture and jot down its information in my notebook!
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Jade: Ah, right, I suppose I should fill this out while I am at my desk, as well.
「Survey on Quality of Life Improvements for the Student Body」
Jade: Quality of life improvements, hm… I think I would wish for a more suitable environment to raise my terrariums.
Jade: Just because a place is suitable for humans to live in, that does not mean that plants or moss will thrive in the same way.
Jade: I've had plants wither away in the shade without knowing that they require a location bathed in sunlight…
Jade: I've even had mushrooms grow from the moss simply because the temperature and humidity were too high…
Jade: That incident was the absolute worst.
Jade: When I returned to my room, the mushroom spores had spread so fervently that the terrarium was completely unsalvageable…
Jade: The cause of that disaster was painfully apparent. It was all due to the fact that I could not control the temperature, humidity, nor the necessary daylight in my room.
Jade: In order to resolve such issues, it would be best to ensure everyone has their own room, regardless of year…
Jade: Or, at the very least, I'd like it if we could partition the rooms completely.
Jade: If only because there was one time that I had purchased a large humidifier, but Floyd broke it, saying he hated how muggy it made the room.
Jade: If we were able to have our individual spaces, then I could install a humidifier, a heater, or even add more windows to regulate natural light… AH!
Jade: Right, Octavinelle is located underwater, so we would also have to take into account levels of salt in the air.
Jade: I'll put "The buildings should be reinforced to be resistant to salt pollution." …Or perhaps I should just request that the whole dormitory be protected by a stronger layer of magic…
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Jade: …Hm, there isn't much space to write my response on this survey. I even had to fully utilize the reverse side of the paper.
Jade: If I were able to provide a better environment for the moss to thrive in, then we should be able to increase their number and spread them even further. Heh, and thus my dreams are spread further.
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[Octavinelle Dorm – Jade's Room]
Jade: …..
[Jade's eyes snap open]
Jade: It seems I've awoken before my alarm today, as well.
Jade: I'm sure Floyd won't wake for some time, so I should go and freshen up while I can.
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[Octavinelle Dorm – Washroom]
Jade: It stays unruly even if I wet it… Haah, it seems my bedhead today is a stubborn foe.
Jade: I'll leave fixing my hair until the end, so for now, I should focus on my makeup routine.
Jade: The most important thing to take into account is protecting my skin from the sun. Sunscreen is to be applied evenly everywhere… Ah, yes, and I cannot forget my ears, either.
Jade: After that, I'll do my eye makeup, and apply a lip balm with further sunscreen protection…
Jade: Now, we get down to this unruly hair… I'll turn on the hair iron…
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Jade: I'll grab the end of the length by my ear and move the flat iron down towards my fingertips while trying to give it a light curl.
Jade: …
Jade: …It came out too straight.
Jade: I thought I had twisted the end properly… I suppose I did not curl it enough. I'll try again…
Jade: …This time the strands are too springy, I must have added too much of a curl.
Jade: It seems my opponent is a fierce one this morning… How fascinating. I shall meet them head on.
Jade: After all, making a proper "J" is a difficult task… One that I find extremely worthwhile!
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[Octavinelle Dorm – Jade's Room]
Jade: After fixing my hair, next is my usual… Wonderful, everything has come out perfectly.
Jade: Not a single wrinkle to be found. Ahh… I do love to see freshly ironed shirts in the morning.
Jade: I can feel my own mood slowly get better with each wrinkle smoothed out of my clothes.
Jade: Now, I just need to iron my handkerchief.
Jade: A black handkerchief, without any embroideries. A gentleman's elegance.
Jade: Now then, it is still rather early… I should head towards the dormitory lounge and enjoy a cup of tea by myself.
Jade: It might be nice to try some of the tea leaves that I've received recently today. After all, it is my birthday.
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[Main Street]
Jade: Good morning, Jamil-san. What a coincidence, running into you in a place like this.
Jamil: How is it a coincidence? We're sophomores on our way to class, so it wouldn't be strange to meet up like this.
Jade: …
Jamil: What's with that look?
Jamil: Yeah, I know. Happy Birthday. …You just wanted to hear me say that, right?
Jade: Heheh, thank you. Just from hearing your well wishes, I think today will end up being a wonderful day.
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Requested by @thelonepearl and @sakurakudo.
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thesevenwondersofawitch · 3 days ago
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This this this
I grew up homeschooled in a family where my parents basically had us fend for ourselves, while also discouraging us from doing any sort of activity or maintain friendships, so the vast majority of my life was spent feeling cut off and inadequate compared to my peers
Shockingly, I ended up having severe depression, (as did my siblings) and developed extremely unhealthy coping mechanisms and habits as a young teenager, as well as other mental issues.
When I finally was able to start the process of getting help(which truly didn't start until the last few years, despite me being in therapy a decade) and started to do things outside of my usual habits, such as going to school and also getting a job(despite my parents trying to discourage me on my bad days), I was now an adult and felt like there was so much I missed out on, especially when looking at my friends experiences at the same ages.
It's so easy to dwell on those thoughts and revert back to old habits, and even harder to try and work through them(like pushing myself to get out of bed, or go to a function with friends). So many people I know who don't have depression just assume it's a little bit of laziness and sadness, and act like everything would be fixed if I just listened only to happy music and refused antidepressants because my generation is 'overmedicated'. And while we definitely are over medicated, without those medicines, so many people (myself included) wouldn't be here.
While my depression is better, and thankfully I've been pretty good with catching up on lost time academic wise, I still struggle with depression and the fallout from everything that has contributed to it. I hang out with friends but almost always end up feeling drained or depressed afterwards, even though I'm around people I care about and like, and I know they feel the same, there is always that voice in my head that one day they're going to change their minds and realize I'm not worth it or that maybe they don't actually like me.
Depression takes a huge toll on my body, I am always tired and overwhelmed, and when I am around friends and peers I feel like I'm an imposter just hoping no one catches on and questions the fact I try to mimic others behavior in hopes I blend in better (even if it's something I know to do, I suddenly feel awkward and panicked and act like I've never dealt with it before, thus watching others and trying to copy movements/actions, even if it's something I'm very knowledgeable about/good at)
I am drained because I feel I have to put on a front that everything is fine, and I feel bubbly and happy all the time, because otherwise people think I'm ungrateful/slighting them, or there out of pity(my sister is someone who thinks all of those reasons unless I'm all happy on the outside). Even though so many times, I was looking forward to doing something or spending time with someone, but for no reason I can think of, I get struck by depression when the time comes, but I still want to take part, because I worry I'll regret missing out, so I go and spend the time trying to act how people want me to, which is exhausting.
It's taken years to get used to these bad days, and I am working to let myself have a breather or just listening to what my body needs when it happens, (I've been better lately and I'm proud of that, but I still struggle occasionally). It's taken years to learn to stop comparing my life with what my younger cousin or old friend is doing/has done by my age, (or if they've done even more), slightly less to learn to ignore the timeframe society(and family) deems is 'normal', and since then, my quality of life has been better.
All this to say, depression has ruled my life and I deal with that everyday, and it is hard to ignore the sadness I feel for my young self and all she never got to do. But, I made it to 23 (something my 13yr old self never thought would happen), and even tho I didn't get to experience things on what is considered a 'normal' timeline for people my age, I have a whole lifetime of experiences to look forward to, and while my depression may be a part of those, it won't be for all of them.
You know what people don’t talk about often enough? Playing catch up in life after spending your teens or early 20s suicidally depressed. There’s so many more layers than just being able to say “I don’t want to die anymore.”
The difficulty in academia or a career after spending years thinking you wouldn’t be alive long enough for any of it to matter.
The exhaustion that comes from self awareness and self soothing, with the constant voice in your head saying “don’t go backwards.”
How lonely it is to watch the people your age starting families when you’re just barely learning what stable relationships are, and the sudden societal pressure of being “up against a clock” for these kinds of things.
The judgement from others if you change your image or interests this late in the game just because you finally figured out who you really are under the demons.
Be kind to those who are developing and blooming after years of not planning on being here long. We are living a life we absolutely didn’t think we’d have, and it’s hard enough without society reminding us there’s expectations of our age.
We didn’t get to be young; we were too busy fighting battles few know.
-
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kityana · 23 hours ago
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there's an interesting moment in "sinsmas" that i think far too many people misunderstood.
it's this one.
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Stolas is a sucker for romantic fantasies.
we know this from pretty early on. he referred to blitzo in fantastic romantic terms like "my knight in shining armor".
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he crossed blitzo's boundaries again and again because he thought their relationship was more intimate than it actually was, and he was sure blitzo was on the same page.
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and he's constantly shown consuming romantic media- romance novels, telenovelas and rom-coms.
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and honestly? i was constantly surprised by how much the narrative didn't punish him for it. not to say he didn't experience heartbreak. not to say some illusions weren't shattered. but at no point was the narrative ever saying stolas was wrong for having those dreams.
no, not even in sinsmas. because you know what happens five minutes after stolas gets angry at himself for doing it all for a fantasy?
this.
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blitzo, slaying a literal dragon with a literal sword to save stolas. it's a scene straight out of a fairytale. and just because subtlety is for losers they even call it out.
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the narrative literally tells stolas, your fantasies weren't foolish. you were right to believe in them. they came true.
it's a reoccurring theme in a lot of hellaverse characters. because you know who else is a dreamer hanging on to impossibly grand fantasies?
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this guy.
sure, they aren't romantic fantasies, but blitzo's business aspirations are not all that different in the level of grandness or delusion. the theme of blitzo aggrandizing himself as a boss and the success of his business have been present since the pilot. they've been hammered home several times, with him, much like stolas, steadfastly ignoring any bit of reality that doesn't settle with his fantasy.
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will blitzo ever get to be the big boss of a circus business with clowns and horses? probably not. does blitzo make plenty of mistakes about the way he runs his business? of course, so many. does he have ridiculous notions about what being a boss means that he needs to unlearn? yes, definitely!
but despite everything, he pushes through. and slowly but surely, his business becomes more successful as time goes on.
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charlie from "hazbin hotel" is actually another good example of that. she also has a ridiculous dream that no one believes in. she also has ridiculous notions inspired by that dream. and the narrative also rewards her for hanging on to it when no one else would believe in it but her.
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the point that seems to repeat in those stories is that those fantasies are important. that the act of believing in them is important. it can inspire you. it can help you push through when the odds are stacked against you. it can provide you with the drive you need to achieve your goals.
if stolas hadn't clung on to his ridiculous romantic fantasies, he wouldn't have believed in what he and blitzo could (and did) eventually become. he wouldn't have persistently tried to reach blitzo for as long as he did, even after he realized blitzo views their relationship so differently from him. he wouldn't have jumped so readily at the chance of what they could be, and found the courage to break free from his miserable, abusive marriage. he wouldn't have let blitzo become his light, and he wouldn't have become blitzo's heart in turn.
and it's not that stolas' is completely blind to reality. he doesn't literally wants to live in a rom-com. it's actually spelled out for us in "apology tour".
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stolas doesn't want to actually be chased in the rain every day, he just wants someone to show this level of care toward him, because no one ever has.
and he finally gets it. and i'm sorry to break this to you, if you're one of the people who seem to be chomping at the bits for the narrative to slap the dreams out of stolas until he gets over them, but he wouldn't have gotten all of this without his fantasies.
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cjlouwho · 3 days ago
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✌🏻
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