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jacevelaryonswife · 8 months ago

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Supermassive Black Hole

A duo project changes some perceptions about your classmate

pairing: Michael Gavey x fem!reader

warnings: smut, period tipical misoginy (2006 guys), loss of virginity, english is not my first language.

word count: 3,297

ewanverse masterlist

When a firm knock came from the door, a name automatically entered your mind.

Gavey.

Michael Gavey.

You imagined that he would come to your meeting eventually, you actually longed to, although you didn't admit it. That idiot deserved to be put in his proper place — which was necessarily below you.

It had all started when a duo project was designated by draw earlier that day, and for both luck and bad luck your partner was the awkward genius, and difficult to deal with Michael Gavey.

There was no shortage of adjectives to be used for the unstable dirty blonde, which was truly fascinating. He intrigued you with his sharp intellect and his eccentric personality to the same extent that he repelled you with his peculiar and almost aggressive way. He was quite a figure, although you didn't allow yourself to think much about it.

It was also not a mystery that he was a true Norman No Mates, which wasn’t difficult to understand since his social skills were disastrous. The memory of him screaming at Oliver Quick in O Week never left your mind, especially the sudden change of attitude when he lowered his head and responded to the sum that Felix's pet (as your friends called him) made. You watched the whole situation closely, with a lot of curiosity, since your tables were close.

After that, whenever he entered an environment, you wondered what he would do next. You never knew what to expect from Gavey.

He started fervent debates during classes, demonstrating unparalleled intelligence and self-confidence, in addition to a slight arrogance that made him look strangely hot. Obviously a dispute of nervous male egos originated from these discussions, which made you watch with veiled fun and irritation while remaining silent. You admired the way his brain worked for math, but you didn't understand how he could be so bad at dealing with other people.

Because of this, you chose to keep a considerable distance from the horizon of events that involved Michael and his complexity, and for a long time this worked perfectly well. Until that damn moment.

Feeling humiliated by the way that insolent worm acted when trying to take responsibility for the whole activity for yourself, as if you were incompetent and incapable, you immediately confronted him about such behavior when he went to your meeting at the end of the class while you collected your material.

"Excuse me?" You asked.

"I'll finish this by Saturday, no need to worry," he repeated condescendingly, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Do you think I won't participate? Or did you just choose to pretend that I don't exist?" You asked with your eyebrows furrowed, posture becoming more imposing.

He remained silent for a short moment, seeming to analyze the situation (or the best answer to it, you couldn't tell). He wasn't used to being so reluctant to say what he thought, so it was a surprise to see him using time to devise something.

"I don't like working in group, I thought it would be faster if I did everything," he looked down quickly, running away from your gaze.

"I also don't like working with other people and I didn't even think about excluding you," you replied.

“Of course you don't.” There it was. The veiled arrogance that you so hated, present in most of your classmates.

Few were your STEM classmates, since your class was mostly composed of resentful boys who did not know how to deal with a woman without seeing her as a less intelligent object. Luckily not everyone was like that and you managed to put together a really cool group.

When all you did was send a cold and angry look, Michael cleared his throat and tried to speak again, but you cut him off impatiently. "When you're less asshole look for me again, I think you have my Myspace."

Who did that little shit think it was to treat you like that? 'Of course you don't' He was so fucking pretentious! And that's because he almost couldn't keep eye contact for a long time.

Pathetic.

That skinny nerd tormented your thoughts for the rest of the afternoon and served as gossip between your friends. Predictable. The way he acted was not very different from what you imagined about his annoying self-sufficiency. And even so, there he was, stopping in front of your door (more nerdy than ever) with his laptop and notebook in hand, wearing a blue button striped shirt, black belt and cream pants. He had a terrible taste in clothes, although they totally reflected his personality, he was curious.

“I'd like to apologize for my behavior earlier, it wasn't cool,” he started as soon as you leaned carelessly against the door.

Interesting.

You considered it for a moment, looking at him before turning his back and clearing the way for him to enter your space. "It wasn't that hard, was it?" You pulled a chair for him and threw yourself dramatically on the bed before sitting down to face him, already well established and looking closely at your figure. "So... I assume you've already thought about the structure of the project."

Of course he had thought.

He opened the laptop and exposed his idea while showing some calculations in his notebook, and you made an effort to pay attention to what was said and what was sketched. Obviously his idea was good, great actually, incredibly structured and cohesive with what the professor wanted. But you also had some ideas and would like them to be taken into account, telling you what you had planned. Surprisingly, he showed to consider your suggestions, even praising them — you knew they were good, but not that his ego allowed you to visualize this. You suggested a division of parts that would be meticulously checked in a future meeting.

"As you have already started, I thought about staying with the second part, what do you think?" You asked.

"It's okay, I intend to finish tomorrow maybe, I'll forward some references by email to you."

“Sure.” It was all very bureaucratic and direct. You sneaked up to look at his laptop screen before looking at what he was typing. "I have some of these books here, but I'll look for the others."

And without realizing it, you got into a big problem.

The freshness that radiated from him flooded your senses gradually, looking too long at his neck and jaw...

He had such beautiful features and aquiline dirty blonde hair that it looked so soft. And those hands... those long fingers... no, no, no and no. You (your body) couldn't be heating up to Michael Gavey.

But it's been a while since some fun... and you were at a suggestive time of the month. Maybe... just maybe... It wasn't a bad idea. As you returned to sitting on the bed, specifically next to where his chair was, you analyzed him as he typed the references in the email. He was not bad looking, no, quite the opposite in fact.

He was handsome, really handsome. And you wanted him. You wanted Michael Gavey.

You wanted to fuck him.

Fuck that attitude.

But how? How would you approach that nervous nerd?

Your mind struggled to develop an effective approach. You didn't want to waste time, not with the heat that spread high between your legs. You just waited for him to send the damn email and close the laptop. "Do you want anything to drink?"

“I'm good. I think we ended up here, I'll try to finish my part quickly," he looked at the notebook that was on the pillow, which you anticipated to pick up and deliver it, standing up in a false farewell.

"Sure," and as soon as Michael got up with the notebook and laptop, you held his arms, gently removing the objects while placing them on your study table. "But I don't think you should go now," you used without a more seductive tone while holding his shoulders.

"What are you doing?" He asked still, tense, looking directly into your eyes.

“Are you dating someone?” You asked softly, getting closer, leaning your breasts against his chest.

"No, I'm not," he answered the obvious, but you wanted to hear the obvious with all the lyrics.

Stretching a short distance from his lips, you asked: "So can I kiss you?"

That same look seen earlier was present again, as if his mind worked hard to find a solution to the problem presented. His mouth opened minimally when he took a deep breath, this time his gaze fell on your lips. "Why do you want to kiss me?"

"Because I fucking want it."

And then you collided your lips with his in a demanding kiss that took a long time to be reciprocated, but when it was... oh boy. Michael held your waist and tried to keep up with your rhythm. He wasn’t so experienced, but his lips were soft and pleasant against yours, kissing you with so much enthusiasm that it made you dizzy.

It made you both dizzy.

He couldn't believe was happening — and that it was happening to you. You... gorgeous, sexy and intelligent. You with a nice and phenomenal ass, who he believed would never look at him twice. You, who kissed him on the tongue and moved his hands to your chest and ass and smoothed the back of his neck and massaged his shoulder. He'd never been kissed like that before. Had never touched a girl like that.

What the fuck was going on?

With the deepening of the kiss you felt a hardness to press against your belly, inhibiting a conscious smile while Michael struggled between apologizing or pretending that it was not happening. Fortunately, you didn't intend to let that be ignored. Your hand slid from the nape of his neck until it reached the increasing bulge, gently squeezing over his pants, making him moan against your lips. You squeezed again before breaking the kiss.

"I don’t wanna just kiss tonight."

Fuck. He couldn't believe what was going on.

He felt that he would cum right there if your hand kept rubbing his cock.

"Are you sure?" He asked uncertainty, still not convinced that you really wanted him that way. It was so fucking sudden, one minute he was collecting his things to leave and the next he was kissing you.

"All the certainty in the world, and you?" You sang against his lips.

"I-" that would be fucking embarrassing, you would laugh at him, "I want to but- I never-"

Oh. It wasn’t different from what you expected.

"It's okay, seriously, there's no reason to worry about it."

“... are you fucking me or something?” He asked weakly, looking at your beautiful face with lust, seriousness and insecurity. You've never seen him so vulnerable.

"Of course not, I want you Michael, I want that, but if you feel you're not comfortable we don't n-"

"I want that."

“Are you sure?”

“I'm fucking sure.”

He felt a chain of confidence run through his body and leaned over to kiss you. You wasted no time unbuttoning his shirt, groping his newly exposed soft torso. Michael almost sighed when receiving your soft touch, pulling the blouse out of your body and coming across exposed and already hardened breasts.

Fuck.

He almost moaned. They were the first tits he saw in person, it was more than exciting. He held them immediately, massaging, squeezing, experiencing...

"Not like that," you held his hands gently.

"Sorry, I never-"

“It's okay.”

Your hands landed on the belt and unbuttoned it, continuing to unbutton the pants that were urgently removed by him while you discarded your own and hovered only in panties, watching him get rid of the shoes as well. Michael had little time to get used to your half-naked figure, since with a mischievous smile, you slowly lowered your panties and left it accumulated on the floor. He felt his neck and face burn and cock pulse with your vision, contemplating for too long.

You touched him over his black underwear, feeling him hard and big, making him moan.

"I won't last long if you keep fucking touching me like that," he took a deep breath, closing his eyes.

"So why haven't you taken that off yet?" You shook his head, teasing him, watching him almost tear off his underwear and show off his cock in all splendor. He was packing, bigger than you expected, all pink, beautiful and anxious. “You have such a nice body,” you kissed him lazily, anticipation thrumming through you.

Michael felt himself in the clouds with your body pressed to his without any layer of fabric, but a big wave of anxiety hit him when you walked away to get a condom before gently guiding him to bed. “Relax, let me take control,” no foreplay would be necessary when you were already wet enough to receive it. "Take a deep breath and calm down, it's quite intense, try to be distracted by something else," you adjusted the condom to its length and saw it almost shake. That boy wouldn't last a minute.

He followed your instructions and concentrated as much as possible not to cum fast, holding firmly on your hips but nothing prepared him for your wet and hot folds.

Fuck, not even the best handjobs compare to your tight pussy going down on his cock. He moaned loudly when you rested against his groin, staring at where your bodies connected.

You bit your lips and closed your eyes, feeling deliciously full. He was bigger than average and had a delicious thickness that you would love to squeeze on your walls just to see him have a spasm, but I knew it would be too much for the beginning.

"When you want me to move, just say it."

Oh no, no! He was sure he would end up there even if you moved. "Don't move yet," he replied quickly, "Fuck," he closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

It was terribly satisfying to see him all vulnerable and red, without the usual arrogance and weirdness, and even better to have him inside you (albeit for a short time presumably). He thought about all the things he heard about sex all his life in those long seconds, filtering out what seemed more credible and useful. Think of something less sexy. It was fucking hard.

“Move.”

“Enjoy baby,” you slid gently up, resting your hands on his chest as you started an experimental and slow rhythm. “Mmm.”

So damn good.

Your juices made the movements easy and smooth, leaving him breathless whenever he was balls deep. The friction generated by the constancy of the movements made you two moan and the tightness on your waist increased. He was a fucking vision with disheveled hair, half-open mouth and crooked glasses, all docile while he was fucked dumb. The feeling of power over such an intelligent man was as exciting as sex, causing a presumptuous smile on your lips when you leaned over to kiss his milky neck, rubbing your body against his.

“Are you enjoying it?” You purred against his skin, kissing him superficially on the lips.

He was in the fucking clouds. And you knew that. Little shit.

He wrapped your body to move his hips against yours. He couldn't hold it anymore, he needed to cum. "I won't last long."

“It's okay, baby.”

Your tits jumped when you started riding it hard at a terrifying pace. He closed his eyes and felt his balls weigh every time you sat on his cock, holding your waist, your tits, your ass, everything you could while you allowed it.

"Fuck- I'm-" he moaned loudly and released his load on the condom, feeling a mind-blowing pleasure that paralyzed his senses and one pulled into a supermassive black hole. A thin layer of sweat covered his body, illuminating the reddish tone that covered it.

So beautiful.

Coming out of the top, you lay comfortably next to him, supporting a part of your peso on his chest while watching him struggling to stabilize his breathing. He still couldn't believe that it had finally happened, and especially with a girl like you.

“Are you here?” You asked after a while with a fun smile, although warm between his legs. He didn't know if he was, but he replied with a panting 'yes'. "Well, because we're not done yet."

What?

“What?” He asked.

“Sex is a two-way street baby, and I haven't come yet,” you purred softly against his ear, biting the lobe.

"I don't know when I'm going to get hard again," he confessed. Well, his brain was working again.

"You don't have these long fingers for nothing, Michael, and if you want it again you'll fuck me with them."

As much as he was affected by a sudden one, his sharp senses were awakened in the implication of a next time. He faithfully believed that hard work would lead him to maximum success in his life, he could not imagine otherwise in this situation. "How should I do that?"

You purred, taking his right hand and guiding it to your wet center. "Always start here if you want to make a girl cum," you circled your bud with his fingers, enjoying the delicious feeling, showing him the place before going down to your entrance. "Start with one finger, then add another."

He followed your instructions firmly, sticking a long finger and pumping slowly. "Not so slow," you bit your lower lip, somewhat impatiently waiting for the development of a slow orgasm. You needed to cum hard. Taking his hand, you held your middle finger and attached it to your index finger. “Faster.”

And although inexperienced and a little strong sometimes, his fingers felt fucking good on your walls, reaching the sweet point that made your feet's fingers curl. “Keep going, mm.”

"Can I kiss you?"

“Yes.”

Michael collided his lips on yours in a kiss full of tongue and teeth, staying on top while he fucked you with his fingers. He was hypnotized by the sounds you were making, by the warmth of your body, by the taste of your mouth...

“I'm close!”

You couldn't believe that that sleeky nerd of all people was giving you such pleasure.

Michael got up abruptly and used the hand that held his weight to circle your clitoris, making your eyes close with the construction of an abrasive orgasm. He pumped faster, watching your body squirm and your back arch.

“Michael- I'm gonna-" your whole body trembled when the coil burst and a hot pleasure flooded your senses, holding the sheets and closing your legs with the strong spasms.

It was the hottest thing he'd ever seen in his life. And he did that. He made you cum. Michael was still very stunned with everything that happened, watching your figure before being pulled to lie next to you. You rested your head on his chest with a satisfied and tired smile, giving light kisses on his skin, relaxed with the post-orgasm fog.

“Did you like it?” You asked to break the ice.

"You've already asked better questions," he joked with a hoarse laugh, "Of course I fucking liked it."

“Mmm, I like to make sure,” you replied, facing his beautiful blue eyes behind the slightly blurred lenses.

Having your body so close (and with everything that happened) Michael felt his cock contract and a new electric current run through his body. "So there's going to be a next time?"

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taglists

general: @succnfuccubus @fan-goddess @kravitzwhore @partypoison00

ewanverse: @aemonds-fire @partypoison00 @schniiipsel @fan-goddess @arcielee

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thank you smm @solisarium for the help with this ❤️

#michael gavey #michael gavey x reader #michael gavey smut #michael gavey x you #michael gavey x fem!reader #smut #saltburn #ewan mitchell #ewanverse

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the-moon-devi · 1 year ago

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RANDOM/UNPOPULAR ASTRO OBSERVATIONS

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warning! These are my observations and unpopular opinions!!

🦋 Mars in gemini how yall like starting multiple projects at once and then stopping because it's boring? This placement may also give a lil bit of ADHD.

🦋 Sun in 12th housers are VERYY VERYYY VERYYY private & mysterious. These people have such a dreamy aura and appearance to them!

🦋 I really haven't seen many people talk about Lilith in the solar return chart but babyyyyy..... watch out for her if she falls into your 1st house cuz omgggg. Lilith will take you for a loop when it comes to how others view you. Constant unwanted commentary on your appearance. Impacts how you feel about yourself definitely could have an effect on your mental health.

Oh yeah and if Lilith falls into ur 1st, channel that dark goddess energy because this is a great time for transformation when it comes to your beauty and how others & yourself view u. People can also definitely obess over you.

🦋 Not only are Mars in 3rd rude but they are also the punctuation police! 🚨 🙁🙄

Aqaurius are very smart but we knew this. This one for my Aqau Moons: (luh yall)

🦋 Yes I'm an Aqaurius moon & yes I have unpopular opinions/ I'm a wierdo. And yes idgaf what you think about my unpopular opinions because in the end...... I'm always right..... 🤷🏽‍♀️

(As I proceed to state an unpopular opinion.....😁)

This may be an unpopular opinion but I speak from own experiences/ intuition when I do astrology so let me know if some of yall resonate with this;

So we know how Venus is exalted in pisces and can show like unconditional love, spiritual love and they tend to be very creative.

I feel like 7th house lord in 12th house / Neptune in 7th house can replicate this. This placement gets a bad rep yes you do attract a lot of narcissistic people and you daydream about your partners and put them on a pedestal. BLAH BLAH BLAHHHH....😫🙄

But whether your spiritual or not this could ultimately lead you to be in a highly spiritual connection with someone and neptune/12th house are like prophecies, future predictions you know......

So when you have this placement if your having dreams or you keep getting signs about a certain person I feel this can lead you to the right person. You just have to really listen and be intuitive to make the right decisions.

This can also make the native to be very creative and imaginative. I could go on and on about this placement but it's truly beautiful and to me resembles venus in pisces. Juno In 12th may also give this.

Is it just me......or do aries men be kinda very mean? I'm a aries and ik i can be mean but it's only when I feel very passionate about something & i dont like to potray that energy to others outwardly but aries men can kinda be very mean at any time ....🥺😣 I luh my aries tho....yall men just be a Lil mean.

Venus in scorpio may get hurt in love alot or have alot of sexual partners. obsessive partners as well

I feel like 1st house lord in 7th can represent beauty as well since 7th house is libra ruled by venus ♀ . This can give the native balanced features

~ These natives also tend to attract a lot partners to them. It could be a case where you don't want a relationship but they just come to you

I watch a video on YouTube from Novi Brown's channel this girl said it's best to get things done during your Saturn sign szn because saturn restricts things & it's hard for you to see & understand lessons. I believe it to be trueeee!!

Ex: my saturn is in cancer

(This may be a little biased since I'm a cancer rising but it worked for me)

In 2020 in cancer szn I Started losing weight and working out/ dieting. (This changed my life)

In 2021 in cancer szn I started looking for a job because I was sick of being home all the time (Isolation my saturn is in the 12th)🙄

In 2022 in cancer szn that same Job I got in 2021 I was promoted to be a manager. These gave me new experiences and helped me get ahead in a way. It was my first job and I was promoted in under a year!

🦋 4th house placements and their privacy

🦋 Saturn ruled signs can be very tone deaf 😭😫

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Alright thats all! Thank u 4 reading & ik it was short just wanted to get this out of the drafts! I hope you guys enjoyed! catch ya later lovelies! Til' next time!

𝓒𝓪𝓻𝓪𝓶𝓮𝓵 𝓴𝓲𝓼𝓼𝓮𝓼 xx🤎💋

~𝓕𝓻𝓸𝓶 𝓟𝓻𝓮𝓽𝓽𝔂 𝓒𝓪𝓻𝓪𝓶𝓮𝓵

☆ . ° .• °:. *₊° .☆ . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊° .☆. • ☆ . °

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

𝑪𝒉𝒆𝒄𝒌 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒐𝒖𝒕!

𝓓𝓲𝓿𝓲𝓷𝓮 𝓓𝓮'𝓛𝓾𝔁𝔁𝓮 (masterlist)

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

©𝓟𝓻𝓮𝓽𝓽𝔂 𝓒𝓪𝓻𝓪𝓶𝓮𝓵

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ticklinglady · 1 year ago

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The Guild's actions during the story are so insane, when you think about them properly, you know? When I first read the arc with them, this moment hasn't really occurred to me, as I was too busy going nuts over finally seeing the names of the familiar writers, but now when I think of that... I am not sure, I comprehend how they managed to achieve such a ferocious reputation. I have already made a little post about how extremely dysfunctional the DOA members are, but at least those guys have a plan, which actually makes sense more or less, even despite the gang using cheatcodes/the Book. The same cannot be said of the Guild however archghhjkn. Like, what the hell were these guys even doing??? XD

So here are just some moments, which weirded me out the most

At first I'd like to address the entire story with everyone's favorite tsundere, Lucy Maud Montgomery. Her introduction leaves quuuuite an impression in the best way and nothing makes me happier than the fact, that she gets a chance to find happiness in the following chapters and actually becomes a reoccurring character! HOWEVER, her entire involvement with the Guild is super odd... I still can't wrap my head around her getting fired. She is a girl with a hella powerful ability, who got taken to the Guild from a terrible, terrible orphanage in order to fight for them in the war for the Book, so not only is she very strong, but she's also immensely dependant on the organisation and wouldn't do anything outside of its interests. Yet Lucy is also put under extreme pressure. As she herself puts it, the Guild doesn't tolerate failures and will kick her out the moment she screws something up.

Later we see that this is exactly what happens, when she messes up her first mission. Fitzgerald himself confirms that, since she failed and revealed her ability to the enemies, she's no longer useful, so now a powerful esper, like Lucy works for free as a... laundress?

EXCUSE ME??? WHEN HAVE THE GUILD MEMBERS EVER DONE ANYTHING, BUT FAIL AND REVEAL THEIR ABILITIES?

Let's be real, these dudes were successful like only once or twice...

This fact not only makes Fitzgerald look like an idiot for wasting such a talented and useful worker, because of one mistake, but also as one hell of a hypocrite, cause he is more than fine with everyone else fucking up. And in case of Lovecraft and Steinbeck: fucking up twice. To add to the oddity, we later learn, that Louisa genuinely cares for Lucy and despite her social anxiety actually stood up for her during the entire story, but even that wasn't enough to change Fitzgerald's mind on the issue, though Louisa is one of the few people, whose opinion he respects. Honestly, this is such a waste of a truly useful subordinate. And speaking of which....

The Guild has never even tried to implement Edgar Allan Poe during the war...

This man is actually rather op when you think of it. He can capture and neutralise literally any ability user in Yokohama (besides Dazai, Mori and Ranpo ofc) just by throwing a book at them. Seriously, as we see with Chuuya, they don't even have to read it, they just need to see the pages. Plus the book can be actually sent via email!!! So why has there been an absolute zero amount of strategies with the use of this ability??? They could actually try to catch Atsushi by sending him such email containing any of Poe's mystery stories and then safely carry him back to their base. And it doesn't have to be just Atsushi, it could be literally any of their enemies. Non-combatant, like Ranpo could use this pretty damn well to his advantage and it doesn't take a genius to understand the potential of the "Black Cat in Rue Morgue". But nooooo, it seems like everyone has just forgotten of Poe!!! (Tho to be honest, I can actually see this situation in a funny extra awfgbfggfjj. Not the main story however) The agency would never even learn of his existence, if he didn't personally decide to try to fuck Ranpo's life up. Like, what does Poe even do in the Guild? He's the master architect and, according to him, the third ranking man in the organization, but we never see him be of any use, so Idk. 🤷🏻‍♀️ Lucy at least got to do something, unlike this poor man.

Then there's the entire drama with the Guild's decision to destroy Yokohama. Where do I even begin...

First of all, Fitzgerald has no way of knowing that Atsushi is going to come to Moby-Dick to fight him. Poor guy is the Guild's primary goal and has already gotten himself captured once, so it would have been safe to assume that the ADA decided to hide him somewhere and not send him on any dangerous missions for the time being. That basically means Fitzgerald could have burned down not just Yokohama, but also the only person, who could actually help him find his precious Book.

But if we're to ignore this, let's also go with Wikipedia then~

"Yokohama is the second-largest city in Japan by population and the most populous municipality of Japan. It is the capital city and the most populous city in Kanagawa Prefecture, with a 2020 population of 3.8 million. It lies on Tokyo Bay, south of Tokyo, in the Kantō region of the main island of Honshu. Yokohama is also the major economic, cultural, and commercial hub of the Greater Tokyo Area along the Keihin Industrial Zone."

..........................

Good luck making up for the destruction of THIS, Fitzgerald 🖕

And if this in itself wasn't bad enough, most people, including me, tend to forget that all Guild members are actually big shots in the American government, which I think is very sad. Because first of all, can you imagine any of the Guild members actually working as politicians?!! The sheer idea makes me hysterical avshbgj. Like, just consider Lovecraft working as a senator or something. This eldritch horror of a man leaves the ocean once in three years at best LMAO. Second of all, I have a feeling, that the destruction of Yokohama at the hands of influential politicians from a foreign country would have resulted in an international conflict or two~ Like as if random deranged rich Americans arriving in Japan, wreaking havoc over there and destroying the second largest city in the country wasn't bad enough, these Americans just HAD to be super influential businessmen and politicians. Louisa, my dear, I understand that it wasn't your intention, but it's as close to a declaration of war as it can get, you know? Fitzgerald may be ready to do anything to resurrect his dead daughter, but I'm not sure, that the execution of himself and the rest of the Guild at the hands of the Hunting Dogs is something he'd like.

(And here's another funny thing that stems from them being politicians 🤭 As @originalartblog wittily pointed out, Fitzgerald wasting all his money fighting sskk has probably resulted in a market crash and recession over in the USA)

I also have some other questions in regards to this entire plan, such as why did they have to waste Moby-Dick just to destroy Yokohama? Yes, it works in the short term, but in the long term they loose a super powerful fortress with the stealth mode and as the practice shows, you better have a safe base, unless you want another lemon freak to blow it all up. I mean, you could just ask Lovecraft to destroy everything for free. Or, if the device is the only way to stop the giant whale from crashing, why didn't Fitzgerald just take it to a far away bunker or something and waited things out there without the need to spend millions of dollars just to survive the explosion? (And it would have been extremely funny, if during the fight with sskk he just threw the device overboard) But I think I have already rambled for long enough already atxhghbgv XD

The Guild is an even bigger mess than the DOA and I think that's glorious 🙌

#the guys stole mafia's building once just to show off and nobody has ever brought it up again #if that's not a true definition of hilarious I don’t know what is ��#bsd fitzgerald #bsd lucy #bsd louisa #bsd poe #bsd lovecraft #bsd guild #bsd #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs #bsd meta #sort of #bsd francis #bsd spoilers #ticklinglady talks

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acequinz · 6 months ago

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Listen most of my thoughts on the lotus trio emerge when I am making silly ot3 comparisons or seeing someone else's post about one character that gets my mind reeling about the other two as well.

And once again I am thinking about how the lotus trio had a different relationship with love and how it affects them in their growth and the way they would/do deal with it when it comes to ot3.

Di Feisheng - barely got any love, actually make it none. He was raised as a soldier, assassin, or whatever just meant to kill others and was trained as such. He did not get any affection while he lived.

Then when he finally ran away, he attracted people due to his talent and strength but never once did he fall for the sweet words and was very good at seeing it for what it was. They were loyal to his strength and not just him that's why despite having a lot of people in the jingyuan alliance he only has like 2-3 people he truly trusts and it's likely that they go the longest together. (I don't remember exactly but you get me) He's not blinded by the fake love people throw at him and is good at discerning genuine affection.

Li Lianhua/ Li Xiangyi - my beloved.... Now heeee, he got some love. It wasn't all the love but it wasn't no love at all. He went from losing everything and starving to finding someone who was kind to him and appreciated him.

To me he also is someone with almost the worst relationship with love out of the three. Not just because he always ends up betrayed or dumped. But because he has the toughest time with discerning genuine love from the fake one.

When he lived as Li Xiangyi, he thought he was genuinely loved by all and it wasn't that they loved his strength because there is a difference and he didn't see that difference, (which is why the break up happened) but also he was hungry for love, he needed it.

You know how they say that if you are starving and you take one bite of something your hunger only gets worse.

That was his scene. Of course he had people who genuinely loved him but by the time he realised the difference between Li Xiangyi's strength and Li Xiangyi himself, he was too far gone and had even lost himself.

Then he started living as Li Lianhua, completely detached because he now no longer needed love as if he was an addict giving up on an addiction but love isn't exactly an addiction not if you are surrounded by the right kind and manage it well.

And he knew himself to not be able to manage it so he gave up on it, maybe even began to fear it.

Then we have Fang Doubing- he got all of it! Every bit of it. But not always. He was a sickly child once, most likely to die, people didn't even think he would live and no one believed in him until he started showing promise after his meeting with Li Xiangyi.

So yeah he was spoiled in love but that love wasn't exactly unconditional at all times, but he had a safe environment to judge it.

Like yes Fang Duobing is open to love and trust but not always, he is smart about it and he knows that if he's wrong and falls he will have people who love him to catch him so he is more open to new people and can take the risk of being kind without knowing everything immediately.

Cause again, it's not like Fang Duobing just opens his heart for everyone and invites them in but he's definitely kinder to himself and others when things come down to it.

He is nice and kind to people he understands as deserving of his care and has an actual ranking of people he cares about.

And honestly all of this is only visible when you watch the three interact together.

At all moments Li Lianhua is the most uncomfortable, is it his hunger acting up? Is it the unraveling of the plot? Or resurgence of the emotions he tries his best to suppress?

He is very confident with resolving mysteries but his biggest fears are dealing with the people who genuinely loved him and it's so obvious with the way he hesitates and even stops in his tracks.

Like he knows the people who never actually loved him and has gotten over it but he still fears the people who did love him with all of their being and he fears having to face them the most.

Even with Fang Duobing we see him struggle to open up and bare himself, it's harder with Di Feisheng because he already sees through every cover up and Li Lianhua doesn't exactly get a choice there. ( Is it also because Li Lianhua doesn't consider himself to be someone loved by him? Probably)

Di Feisheng isn't exactly open to anyone except Li Xiangyi from the start but he doesn't really fear it and back away either and that's visible in the almost indulgent way he treats Fang Duobing.

Like sure initially it's cause he can't do anything about Fang Duobing but eventually they do begin to work together very well, there's an almost unspoken understanding between them. (Unspoken from dfs because we know fdb loves to yap) And Di Feisheng sees the promise in Fang Duobing as well, respects it but like- it's too early for you to be considered for my rival position, come back in another 10 years and I will THINK about it-.

And it's because he doesn't shy away and actually looks at Fang Duobing too, maybe it's because he knows Fang Duobing is looking at him or he just wants to see what Li Xiangyi sees in him but he does look at Fang Duobing and most definitely appreciates what he sees.

Maybe the view is that of a defenseless puppy at first who most likely won't survive but not only does the puppy continue to survive but he only gets stronger and he doesn't lose himself in the change.

Neither Li Xiangyi nor Di Feisheng accomplished that. And Di Feisheng wouldn't change himself even now but he will respect the grind of the protective puppy.

And very few people have his respect. (Also if I may add, respect and acknowledgement is the way Di Feisheng loves hence his constant screams of Li Xiangyi being his only rival and worthy of standing against him are practically love confessions that Li Lianhua/ Li Xiangyi never saw)

Then comes Fang Duobing, he clings to Li Lianhua very fast, open and trusting despite the trickery that befalls him.

He has subconsciously already made the decision that he trusts Li Lianhua and once his subconscious connects it to his main consciousness he takes it in a stride, like fuck yeah! I trust him.

He knows the other keeps his secrets but he also judges his actions and makes the choice to continue trusting Li Lianhua cause let's be honest there are many instances where Xiaobao is indignant and would/should walk away but he makes the active decision to stay because he trusts and loves Lianhua (platonic or romantic is your choice).

Then comes in Di Feisheng and he doesn't cling half as fast, he's on the edge and still judging until Li Lianhua reveals a 10 year long connection and even then he just relaxes a little, still considering a-fei and trying to decide which slot to put him in? But he has already accepted him by this point, he is one of the people under Fang Duobing's protection and he will care for him, even if he doesn't get him yet.

There's few reasons to trust either of them but he does anyway because that's just how loved and honestly he wasn't wrong with it.

Now I know I am using mainly Fang Duobing to explain my thoughts on others but it's because there's a lot of offscreen history between dihua and I have yet to form full ideas on how i think their relationship actually goes other than the simple unwavering trust they have in their own knowledge of their rival.

And we more or less meet dihua in their final arc while fang Duobing is in his first arc so I have more in show stuff to go off of. So my headcanons for difang and fanghua are a lot more detailed compared to my dihua headcanons. (I am still building around them).

#mysterious lotus casebook #li lianhua #di feisheng #fang duobing #difanghua

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androgynousblackbox · 8 months ago

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Welcome to Hazbin Vale. 9 [Radioapple, Appleradio]

"Mmm? Oh right, I still have to do this.

I mean, good morning, dear friends! How are you all waking up today? Refreshed up? With a load of new energy to carry and face a new day? I truly hope so, because a day like no other is exactly what we are going to get.

But don't let me too ahead of myself. As any cooker know, you must let the food simmer for a bit, to cook on it's own juices, before hastly just gorging it out like a pag. And here, in Hazbin Vale, if there is anything that we have is class. Manners. Patience.

We have waited for so long, dear listener. We can take it as calmly as it comes.

Last night I am sure some of you noticed a distinctive lack of moon and stars on the cloudless sky. And if you didn't, well, now you know!

If any of you had ever bothered to pay more attention to it, then you would have also realized that stars systematically have been falling from the sky for a while now, one by one. It was actually quite an impressive view, but my, my, everyone is so busy right now that nobody was outside admiring the espectacle.

Truly a pity. When the end comes, the least you could do is watch.

I saw it all from here the entire night. I didn't want to risk it. As it turns out, desk of studios make for a horrible bed! Who knew!

But I am told to tell you all to not worry at all. Carry on as usual. The sun just looks bigger than normal and less warm because of some astronomic mambo jambo nonsense I do not care at all, so you shouldn't either. What we have above our heads, dear listeners, and also right under our feets, is so beyond our understanding that sometimes we should avoid questioning it at all.

The cemetery and community center are from today both open. Everything is out in the open now. There is absolutely no place to hide. You might satiate your insatiable curiosities to your heart's content all that you like without any concern. If you are ever so lucky, you might find that a nice surprise that will make it quick for you.

Interpretate that as nasty as you want if that will make you stop being a stain on the surfice of the earth, listener.

The cave on the outskirt of town has finally cave in. Oh, we do have to admire how much it managed to stay as it was for, well, for even longer than I have been alive. That is quite impressive. Let's give an applause for the rocks that gave a valiant fight, the broken beer bottles and the blood shed as a result.

I told you all that could happen, didn't I? I just happened to pass by while seeing some hungry raccoon trying to get themselves a bite before the police arrive. Somehow a hand was sticking out from under the rocks and it was still moving! The human body is truly a wonderous mystery. Just the amount of abuse and torment that it can withstand is enough to make a man smile.

It didn't last long, of course. Raccoon will make sure of that and you know what they say: the fresher, the better! But a good effort nonetheless.

I have also been informed that our transmission of today will last for as long as it needs to be. That's right, as far any of my dear beloved listener is out there left to listen, we will keep transmitting to your satisfaction and joy.

Don't try to turn off your radios. It won't work.

The only time we went out of schedule like this was when the kindergarten burned down after that teacher was killed by an ex boyfriend. Do you all remember that? So many people screaming all around made it difficult to speak, but it was a fun moment all the same. The one and only time that we used the portable equipment to be right on the scene and report you the last updates. Don't you miss it sometimes, dear listener, when things were a lot more simpler?

Oh, but no disaster of that nature is what is happening today. Of course not. Today is a normal and common day like any other. Don't pay attention to the sun, that must have gotten bigger since the last time I talked about it. Suns do funny things like that sometimes, everyone knows that!

Ah, but I am afraid that we won't be getting any guest or calls for today. I had Niffty ripping the phone line off after… certain someone tried to call in. I am sure they would say that they were just trying to solicit some song or something like that, but no matter, nobody can do that now! It's just Niffty and me here on the good old studio for the entire day, and Niffty has gone up to her attick again so it's only just me!

A one man show. As it was always supposed to be. And aren't we all lucky that man is me?

I just have some curiosity left, listener. Do you feel that anything is different at all? Did those teenagers that were looking to hang out in the cave? Did they felt like a peak on the electricity in the air, some kind of static that puts all the nerves on high alert for the potential danger that it can't even behind to fanthom? Or was it just the sound of one rock falling to the ground, after another, before everything else was on top of them?

The only thing I lament is not being able to ask them. Not even the owner of that solitary hand would have been able to say anything, not with a broken jaw like that. Not that I saw their mangled body or anything. I was, and I always am, nothing but a respectable model citizen so I just took a look and made my way straight here, to do what was asked of me.

You are welcome, by the way.

There is a window here, did I ever mentioned that? I can't imagine in what context that would have come out, but regardless, there is. It offers a lovely view of the main street that goes to the end of town, right before the hallway opens up to empty wastelands in direction to the next civilization. I can see everyone who comes out or comes in if I wanted to.

I usually keep the curtains extended over it because, let's face it, outside of the rare crash or manslaughter of those who didn't looked both ways before crossing the street, not a lot of interest to be had there. Been good at road safety has always been one of the few flaws of this town, sadly.

Up until now it has been rather peaceful. Not a lot of people who were planning to go out to the nearby town to maybe visit grandma on her birthday or were planing to go pick their stranged daughter at the airport. But I hope it will pick up at some point in the morning. The day is young and we have so much time to enjoy it to it's last second.

The sky getting slighty darker might give you a wrong impression of the time, though. But rest assured, your watches still works perfectly fine. The only issue is that I can't see the sun from here. This building cast a long shadow from this window.

Has it started to smile yet? If not, don't worry about it. There is nothing to concern yourself with. It's when the eyes open that it's truly interesting part begins.

Oops, I wasn't supposed to say that, ha ha! Spoiler! My bad. Please ignore it as you go about your normal and completely irrelevant day.

Let's instead just remember how wonderful and great our town is. We used to be a great tourist center, a convenient space between other cities for people to stop by on their way. One where people find joy watching our huge ball of yarn, that it was mostly filled with styrofoam and twig before yarn ever came into the equation.

We had that adorable bowling alley with the greasiest pizza anyone could eat with it's own karaoke on the side. The businesses were thriving. There was so much things to look at and play with back then. Our young weren't constantly leaving to look for bigger opportunities elsewhere, only to waste years of education in careers they are never going to take.

But things change, don't they? They get stagnant with enough time. They become boring. Predictable. And that might be the biggest tragedy of it all. What is life, I ask of you, dear listener, if not a constant symphony of screams all in perpetual crescendo until it's dying end? How else a man is supposed to know that they aren't truly dead yet without it?

There is just no end to this. This is all your life has been and all everything will ever meet you as. For some weaker minds this can be frightening, paralyzing even. They let themselves become part of the scenary, another potted plant on the corner that does what it supposed to do, because I guess that is easier than take control of their own lives.

For others, this might be just the push they need to finally learn a few new tricks. So you study and you work and exchange words with the right people, others who also refuse to just let the monotony kill them silently.

And what if you have to step on a few toes? It's not your fault that they didn't wise out before. And what if some of those toes fall out or get crushed like mashed potatoes under your feet? That at least is something new.

And the new starts are always so exciting, dear listener.

Your journey begins where it was supposed to end. That is an exhilitaring thought not many get to have.

If life won't give you lemons or oranges or apples or anything at all, then you carve into the ground with your own bare hands until you find something, covered in mud and your own blood from the nails that are ripping apart from your skin. You grip it as tight as you can despite the pain, despite the burning sensation that is chipping at the soul you didn't know you had, and won't let go until you make it your own.

You let it grab onto you and take what it needs to survive. You feed it, you protect it, you do whatever is necesary so none of you ever gets forgotten again. You form bonds you never expected to make before becuase it's either that or come back to how things were before, to the sad, dull, predictable nature that you had to escape from.

They promise you that you will always have an ally on your side even if this chapter ends. No matter in what new book are you thrown into or how much you change, that constant hand on your shoulder will never abandon you to remind you of where you come from and where you still have yet to go. It will follow you more loyally and closer than your own shadow ever could, even in total darkness.

The only thing that it ask in return is that you keep it well fed for as long as you exist. The bottom of it's stomach is neverending like outerspace itself and, let's be honest, you are never going to fill it. Which basically garantees that you will always have a new beginning to find more food. You will always a new playground to have fun with even if you already burned down the previous one. Completely consequences free. The only thing remaining being your own memories of it and you can fill it with as many screams as you want.

Doesn't that sound just ideal, dear listener? Who wouldn't shake hands with a promise such as that one?

Ah, but for now, I will leave you for a moment with the weather. I have to take a look outside, I can't resist the curiosity anymore.

See you soon."

#radioapple #appleradio #duckiedeer #lucifer x alastor #hazbin hotel au #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin hotel lucifer #welcome to night vale au

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pardi-real · 10 months ago

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Tarot of Destiny / Chapter 6 - Salvation Amidst Suffering

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Warning: Berrien's devil power spoiler. The moment Berrien appears can be skipped until Muu appears if you want to avoid it.

Bastien: "Well then... Even though I said that to Lono... I'm not really confident about speaking well."

> "Don't be so nervous."

Bastien: "My lord... Yes, you're right. As you say.

My lord has been someone who's easy to talk to since we first met... If I just talk as usual... The words will naturally come out. First, please look at the tarot card that was dealt to me.

The card I received is... ‘The World' card in ‘reversed position’. ‘The World' tarot card itself signifies 'harmony' or 'completeness,' so in reverse... it means that I'm still 'incomplete.'

Incomplete, huh... Well, it does seem that way. Pff..."

> (Is he laughing...?)

Bastien: "Ah, sorry about that. To think that I was accepting the fortune's result honestly... I couldn't help but laugh at how I've changed so much from my past self."

> “The past Bastien, huh..."

Bastien: "Yeah... The old me would never have listened to advice from fortune-telling. Always only thinking about myself, ignoring other people's words entirely.

Even if the comrades around me reached out to help... I kept them away out of fear of forming bonds... Missing out on opportunities to become stronger...

I even put my comrades in danger because of my selfish actions. And... when I underwent demonization, I even aimed my sword at them."

> "Bastien..."

Bastien: "But... The one who saved me was my lord. No... It's better to say that my lord gave me a rebirth.

My lord... taught me a new way of life. I'm sincerely grateful. I'll never forget this feeling. From now on... I vow to serve by my lord's side until death."

> "Thank you, Bastien."

Bastien: "............ Hmm... Looking back on my past while looking at the tarot card... I simply spoke the words that came to mind... Was that okay?"

> "It came across very well."

Bastien: "Is that so? If my lord says so... it seems like it went well. Anyway... I feel at peace right now."

Trudge… trudge…

Berrien: "Fufu. Judging by your radiant expressions, it seems you managed to convey your feelings well, Bastien."

Bastien: "Yeah... I think so. Sorry to keep you waiting, Mr. Berrien. Next is your turn. I hope you can express your feelings well..."

Berrien: "Fufu... Thank you very much."

Bastien: "Well then, my lord. I will excuse myself for now."

After saying that, Bastien left the garden.

Berrien: "Fufu… It feels somewhat nerve-wracking. There are feelings I want to convey to my lord that are beyond words... But when I try to express them... I get frozen, wondering how to articulate these emotions.

Nevertheless, the purpose of this occasion is nothing but finding a way to save my lord. So, I'll express my own feelings according to Lady Elvira's instructions."

> "I understand."

Berrien: "Fufu... Thank you very much. Well then... First off... about the tarot card dealt to me.

My card is... 'The Hermit' card in ‘reverse’. It signifies 'seclusion' or 'deception'... It's not a very favorable meaning, but... it seems to be a fitting card for me.

Because I have been... keeping silent about the 'ability to delay demonization' for a very long time... Not just to my fellow butlers... but even to my lord, I deceived them.

After confessing the secret... Everyone forgave me, but that's why... I regret not ‘revealing it earlier’... I've regretted it for a long time..."

> "Berrien ..."

Berrien: "Fate is a mysterious thing, isn't it?

The 'secret' tormented me for a long time... But thanks to my lord, who possesses ‘the power to rescue us from demonization’... I was liberated from that suffering.

Truly... I cannot thank you enough, my lord. Of course, my own heart has become lighter, but more than anything... for rescuing my precious comrades. I no longer have to weigh my comrades' lives... or feel torn apart. That truly... makes me happy, so happy... My lord.

Thank you so much for becoming our lord. And please remain our lord... from now on."

> "Of course, Berrien"

Berrien: "Fufu... Thank you very much. There are still many feelings I want to convey... but I think the other butlers are waiting too... Let's leave it at this for now."

Afterward... Muu and the other butlers gathered in the garden again.

Muu: "We reflected on ourselves with the tarot cards... and conveyed the emotions that emerged as Lady Elvira instructed, but..."

Lono: "So... how was it? My lord. Don't you feel like... 'I've been saved~!' kind of realization?"

> "I wonder..."

I felt happy listening to the butlers' feelings... But I didn't really feel like ‘I've been saved.’

Lono: "I-is that so...? Well, that makes sense."

Bastien: "Yeah. This action itself won't have the effect of saving the lord. The 'answer' to save the lord... is something we already have."

Berrien: "That's right. There must be a hint hidden somewhere. By conveying our feelings to the lord, we might realize where the answer to save the lord is... Isn't that what it means?"

> "Realize, huh..."

Berrien : "Well... it's just wishful thinking."

Lono: "Hmm~... I really don't get it at all."

Bastien: "Anyway, we just have to continue doing the same thing..."

The butlers were troubled, trying to save me. Knowing that the butlers cared so much about me... Rather than feeling anxious, a sense of warmth grew within me.

Muu: "Hmm? Is everything alright, my lord? You seem a little happy, though..."

> "It's nothing."

Muu: "Is that so? But well... If my lord looks happy, no matter what the reason is, it makes me happy!"

Trudge…trudge… trudge…

Fennesz: "Good morning, my lord."

> "Fennesz?"

Berrien : "Perfect timing, Fennesz. We just conveyed our feelings to the lord earlier."

Fennesz: "I see. So, is it our turn next...? In that case, my lord. There's a horse prepared outside the inn. Would you mind coming with me?"

> “Okay” > "Where are we going?"

Fennesz: "Fufu... The destination will be a surprise after we arrive."

Berrien: "Then, Fennesz. Please take care of the lord."

Fennesz: "Understood. Everyone, please take care of Lady Elvira's safety."

Muu: "Take care, my lord!"

> "Yeah, I'm going"

Thus, I rode a horse with Fennesz... and headed towards the city of Maginaria.

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#aknk #Tarot of destiny

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notsp1derman · 5 months ago

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a review full of childlike wonder of the wizard of earthsea, by ursula k leguin

[may contain spoilers]

“A rock is a good thing, too, you know. If the Isles of Earthsea were all made of diamond, we'd lead a hard life here. Enjoy the illusions, lad, and let the rocks be rocks.”

Ever since I've started reading A Wizard of Earthsea, two thoughts have been circling my mind:

How the fuck is Harry Potter more acclaimed than this?

Wow, the Ghibli movie really doesn't do it much justice.

Earthsea is a simple story in its core, yet so groundbreaking in so many details (and in such a subtle way too) that I just understood how special it is after I finished reading. Within a third of the size of staples in the genre like The Name of the Wind (which has a similar plot and worldbuilding as well), it manages to tell an adventure that would captivate any child and entertain any adult, even those very serious about realism in fiction like me. Although we fly by many important events in this 180 page book, each one of them feels carefully thought out, a perfect balance between the sentiments of our protagonist and the hard laws of the world.

The archipelago of Earthsea feels alive and solid under the words of this book, and there wasn't a single moment where I was fished out of the immersion because of a poorly explained piece of lore or a boring infodump about the details of commerce that I don't really care about. LeGuin weaves together hard worldbuilding and the childlike wonder of unexplained mysteries in a beautiful way, encapsulating a joy in discovering a new world that I haven't felt in years.

Of course, nothing is perfect, and sometimes I wish there was a bit more of detail about landmarks, people and even Sparrowhawk. Still, it somehow works because it brings out the imagination I had as a child to fill all of the blanks myself. In this process I the archipelago of Earthsea became mine too. I love descriptive books that paint a vivid picture of a place that exists only in the dreams of the author, but a change of pace sometimes can feel like a breath of fresh air, and this is how Earthsea felt for me.

But the most special feature of this book is the way the author uses narrative. Her way of telling the story of Sparrowhawk as an omniscient narrator, giving away teasers of later events but keeping the thrill of the journey in its twists and turns almost feels like a legend told by fireside, of a hero long gone. We know of Sparrowhawk's potential as a hero and we know he will be a great wizard, but he still feels human even with this semi-detached style of narrative so common in legends. Because although his power is vast, his hubris is entirely human.

And between dragons and magic and islands, Earthsea discreetly brings a message of balance and self-discovery, that is intrinsically connected to Sparrowhawk's development as both wizard and person. The wisdom passed through the pages doesn't feel like the author giving some unwanted lecture, but more like a sage advice that I truly am compelled to take seriously.

I can't help but love books like this, able to charm me with a wonderful world and fantastical characters, but also able to bring me reflection about human nature. By naming the shadow with his own true name, a gesture so significant in Earthsea, Sparrowhawk made peace with the dark parts of himself, that his own arrogance brought to life. And by understanding all parts of himself, he became a better wizard and finally found a bit of peace. It is a journey we all must take, albeit a less fun and more plain one.

★★★★★

#booklr #yas reviews books #earthsea #a wizard of earthsea #ursula k. le guin #this felt like being 12 again #but like in a good way

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k-s-morgan · 11 months ago

Note

︎This is the first time ever I'm writing to a writer as I'm a lil anxious about my English. But after many years of reading your flawless work (TGSTLTH), I really couldn't hold myself anymore; if I stay silent one more second, I'm going to explode from repressed emotions.XD

I'm absolutely going crazy over your storytelling. I think nobody -and I do mean NOBODY- was this close to perfection with the characterization of Sebastian and Ciel. It's like you are working together with Yana herself. You've really managed to catch every aspect of their relationship that made this whole storyline (manga and anime) the way it's been, which seems to be the entire reason why I still can't get over Kuroshitsuji. It's just so dark and dramatic... the bitter power struggle between these two and the way they compete for control —which is pretty entertaining to see when you think about it because both parties are unable to maintain any type of control or authority over the other.

From what I see, this fandom has mixed feelings about S2 of the anime. Some love it, some ignore its whole existence, and some people are okay with it. Unfortunately, I'm the second one. I like the story arcs that are canon to the manga. When I first started to read TGSTLTH, I really thought that fanfic would follow the storyline without S2 in it since you reflect the complexity of the bond they share as a human and demon so prettily. I've always wondered if Ciel, as-twelve-years-old brat, managed to become Sebastian's living hell, how much of a pain in the ass he would be as he grows older. And the plot has several unresolved mysteries that have not been addressed yet. That's why I'm not a big fan of S2; it closes off all the possible ways this story can go as its ending. However, you are the only one who could warm me up to S2; I trust you.

I read the snippets. It was surprising to see Ciel doubting his appearance. I was questioning whether his look-alike was truly superior or if it was just the circumstances influencing his perception. I feel like it's mainly his fear of not being good enough for Sebastian to stay. Which explains his continuous freak-out about the possibility of his soul being unworthy. And I clearly remember Sebastian thinking, "The boy wasn't nearly as pretty" upon seeing him.

Your talent is exceptional and beyond comparison. Please never stop writing. Stay safe...❤❤

Ps. If my English is difficult to read or understand, please feel free to ignore this.

Hi! Please don't worry, your English is absolutely fine! I'm so happy you've been enjoying Those Gentle Slopes so much, and I'm honored that you feel like I did justice to Ciel and Sebastian. They are my favorite characters, and Ciel is probably my most favorite character ever, across all fandoms, so I really treasure the chance to work with them and get such lovely feedback from other readers.

With S2, yes, it created a lot of controversy in the fandom, but also yes, I love it with my whole heart! I always call it a love letter from Sebastian to Ciel. I do have some issues with it, like the exccessive sexualization in general and of Hannah in particular - it feels just awkward sometimes, but the main plot and especially the resolution make me ridiculously happy.

I agree that the bond between a demon and a human is fascinating. I enjoy exploring it a lot, and I so look forward to all the adventures Ciel and Sebastian will have. But I also think that it cannot go on like this forever: even if Ciel got older, sooner or later, something wuld have to give. He'd either die from old age, which would feel like a very underwhelming ending to me, or Sebastian would eat his soul likepromised - but then I'm sure we'd have ended up with the Red Valentine development, where he's lonely, miserable, and missing Ciel. The idea of Ciel becoming a demon in a way that puts such a strain on his relationship with Sebastian - it's like a new life for their bond. So many new conflicts and possibilities could emerge from it - new settings, new events, new power struggles. If you stick around, I really hope you'll like it! And I really appreciate your trust.

And yes, you're absolutely right, Ciel is prettier than his look-alike (at least from how I envision it). Sebastian probably overestimates the difference between them a bit because he's biased in Ciel's favor while Ciel is freaking out because he's been feeling insecure and unworthy for a while at this point, and learning about Sebastian's second contract was just the last blow. These two idiots…

Thank you for your wonderful ask again! I hope you enjoy the next chapter.

#my fics #sebaciel #black butler #kuroshitsuji #ciel phantomhive #sebastian michaelis

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miyakuli · 7 months ago

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Roadwarden

I'm a poor, lonesome roadwarden

I'm a long way from home. My footsteps have led me to this mysterious and dangerous peninsula. I've been asked to explore it to find out more about the locals, so that I could guarantee a commercial exchange with my customers. I only have a few days, and my future meetings and decisions will be decisive.

❤ The history of this region is truly rich. Each village has its own history, customs and beliefs, and even its own dialect. So each visit will therefore be enriching as the locals place their trust in me. Each of them has more or less stormy relations with their neighbors, and I'll do my best to manage any conflicts. But these lands also abound in places that are difficult to penetrate or hidden, so I'll need to be patient to reach them, and who knows, they may reveal new knowledge that will help me in my quests. So many things to discover! ❤ My past is my heritage and I decide my future plans for myself. My skills are my own. As for my social relationships, I'll decide in due course whether or not I'll adapt to the person in front of me. I'll make my own choices according to my own morality and circumstances, but I doubt that everyone will come out a winner in the end… even me. Who's to judge anyway? ❤ The landscape around me is minimalist but striking, and I enjoy observing the different architectures and admiring and fearing the nature that surrounds me. Certain things don't always appear in my field of vision, but I can easily imagine their outlines because they've been sufficiently described to me. ❤ Sometimes I close my eyes to appreciate the sounds around me; I can hear the wind blowing, the rivers flowing, my faithful steed grazing beside me, the cries of creatures in the distance keeping me alert…and sometimes silence, which is never a very good sign. I wonder if there isn't a traveling bard, because I often hear soft music above my head, often melancholy but very pleasant. I'm hoping to ease the tension in this place, so maybe next time I'll hear more festive music…

+/- I feel the weight of time passing, I have so little of it given all the tasks entrusted to me, and I have to evaluate for myself the shortest and most advantageous routes to achieve my ends. I've almost become a tactician. However, I regret my arrival in this region, where my physical condition and lack of wealth and adequate equipment, as well as my unfamiliarity with the area, made me waste precious time. It was very brutal and almost punishing. Of course, I could always come back some distant day and be ready to deal with it, but my first visit will always be the most memorable, and I'm sad to leave when I had one of the peninsula's biggest mysteries right at my fingertips. How frustrating. +/- I feel very free in my actions, which are not always dictated by intrusive thoughts. I can ask locals about places and people on my own, just by mentioning their names or sometimes even a simple description…but it seems that sometimes, my field of possibility is too wide to act, especially for people like me who don't master the local language. I don't necessarily have any clues, and my words and gestures will often have to be extremely precise, as any other alternative won't be accepted.

✖ My encounters were certainly significant, but I don't think I'll keep very fond memories of all these people. The atmosphere was always very austere, which I can understand given the tense situation in this region, but I didn't manage to get attached to many people. And even the friendships I made at the time seemed cold and distant. Only Eudocia managed to touch my heart, despite my solid armor, and she'll always have a place in my memories. I hope she's doing well. ✖ I've never been able to maintain a decent level of hygiene throughout my entire journey. As much for my hunger, my clothes and my magic, I always managed to find a good balance. But finding a place to bathe and sufficiently remove the grime from my body was a priori my nemesis. The locals often stared at me with disdain and I too often struggled to gain their trust because of my filthy appearance. I vowed never to set off on an adventure again without first buying a bar of soap! ✖ Even when I was very well armed and equipped, some monsters resisted me because a single choice could be fatal. Losing a big chunk of my armor just because I thought of dodging a monster rather than jumping on it, sometimes undermined my morale, and I admit to having used my "save" spell at times, which allowed me to relive my confrontation. And I don't like to go through all this for a single error of judgement. What's the point if not to strengthen my physical condition and my weaponry…

In the end, my short excursion didn't reveal all the peninsula's mysteries, and I left intrigued, wanting to see more, to learn more. At least my visit brought a little something positive, but unfortunately not for everyone. I'll certainly be back to revisit this faraway land, Over mountains and over prairies, From dawn 'til day is done, My horse and me keep riding, Into this settin' sun.

youtube

➡ My Steam page

#roadwarden #look at my rp review X'DDD I DID MY BEST OK #just the part with the bard to explain the ost makes it so ridiculous lol but I like it anyway #personal #Lola plays games

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om-nom-berries · 1 year ago

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Heya! The topic of old Zelda fancomics came up in a Discord I'm in--while educating the younger fans about the days of yore, I got curious to see if the Web Archive had managed to preserve enough of IndieZelda to be readable or not. The answer was basically no (just the lovely mid 00's page layout and a few graphics, sadly!)

...so I thought I'd go directly to the source and ask if you still had any of your IndieZelda comic series page files hanging around? If you do, would you be up for uploading them to archive.org as a zip or pdf or something, for fandom posterity?

As a comic artist myself, I understand if you'd prefer to just let your old work vanish from the internet entirely... but those old comics were a huge influence on me, and I truly believe every artist's early work is worth preserving and studying.

Anyway, just thought I'd ask! Hope you're doing well!

Oh wow, thank you for remembering me! And for the kind words. I try not to get myself down about my older stuff. And I was lucky to have a lot of support over the years where people gave me space to grow.

I'm happy to say all the comics from Indie Zelda are preserved over on History of Hyrule thanks to my good friend and Zelda archivist, Melora!

Go here to History of Hyrule's comic section, and you'll find my comics if you just scroll down.

You should also be able to download them as zip files as well. I just gave Hyrule Downtown a quick glance because I was worried about inappropriate stuff and I can't say I understand the humour today lol. I also think Ganondorf would be the cleanest one of the three. But tastes change as you age. And I think Liza Minelli is great.

I've also been giving Melora my print comics to archive as time passes. But I've also put some of those up for free download on my Ko-Fi shop:

Zelda 25

Twilight Princess Series

Space for Us Among The Clouds (Skyward Sword)

It's missing the Dark Mirror series, but that's because I'd like to finish it one day.

It is hard for me to look at my old stuff, but it's good to keep my ego in check and again remind myself how far I've been able to get because people cared enough about me and my work. It's not just me. Art is a collective experience, which is where the fun is. Also, it takes the mystery out of becoming an artist to those that want to get into the process. I don't believe hiding that away, so if being vulnerable and letting people into that helps someone, then that's worth it.

#om nom zelda #om nom comics

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winterslibrary · 8 months ago

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"...oh, doctor Lucianna! I have to admit, for as long as I've been working here and trust me, I've spent majority of my life here, I never saw anyone else as talented and dedicated as Lucien. Despite their own issues with health, they continue helping other patients and fighting tirelessly for those letting out their last breaths... I still fail to understand why do you think they are related to those disappearances. Our Lucien is a good soul, they wouldn't hurt a fly. Wasn't that man a criminal either way? I get that it's your responsibility take care of this, but isn't it better that that man is gone?"

━ ISABEL, head surgeon, about LUCIANNA

NAME: LUCIANNA, also known as LUCIEN or LUCIE. RARITY: 5 STAR COMBAT TYPE: QUANTUM PATH: ABUNDANCE USUALLY RESIDES IN: PENACONY

IMPORTANT: lucianna is non-binary and uses they/them! i personally call them by lucie but lucien and lucianna are also a-okay. they usually introduce themselves as lucien though. also both fem and masc terms are okay !! everything's written in more general language than trying to pull out my writing braincells cuz i have none for now </3 but... for sure i will write write something with them at one point.

GENERAL NOTES: Although Lucie usually resides in Penacony, the hospital they work at is on completely different planet. They tend to travel a lot because of that, one day chilling among luxuries of the Penacony's Golden Hour, the next day rushing to a hospital for a sudden emergency! It can be tiring sometimes, truly. But Penacony gives them enough time to rest before another week spent working on sick or dying patients. There's something else they do between their job, though...

(tws for: human experimentation, medical malpractice, cults and (mass) murder in lucie's backstory. feel free to skip that part !!)

BACKSTORY: There's thing thing, you see. Lucie from always was a rather sick child, struggling with their health and at one point things got so bad, that Lucie truly believed the end was near. With no money to afford proper medicine, only thing left was pray for a miracle, and yet what Lucie got was a curse under the guise of one.

Because they were young and desperate to live, when a mysterious doctor offered them medicine that could save them they instantly agreed, unaware how big the pay would be for their life.

That doctor turned out to be a part of a group of abundance followers, that in the name of Yaoshi would perform... rather questionable medical experiments, be it on medicine, be it on other human livings and Lucie, not wanting to lose their only source of medicine, forced themselves to join the group and assist them in whatever experiments they were doing, even if it included hurting other people.

Luckily, with time Lucie managed to learn how to brew their own medicine– alongside with more general knowledge regarding medicine, which allowed them to run away from that terrible group of people, self-called followers of Yaoshi yet filthy liars in reality. But not without a revenge, no.

To this day people wonder who– or what killed that group one by one, everyone dropping dead like some flies... Lucie wouldn't know. They are happy to be the only survivor and to be finally free.

After that, Lucie started expanding their medical knowledge– turns out that when you don't have to literally torture people with poisons and dangerous surgeries, medicine is quite interesting! And that was how Lucie ended up working in a hospital, slowly climbing their way up, soon becoming one of the best doctors out there. They genuinely care about their patients, always willing to stay up nights and weeks to ensure that someone survives.

That doesn't mean Lucie completely let their past away, no. They spent years in that... weird group, among these people using an aeon to commit atrocities on often innocent people. And Lucie, as much as they wouldn't want to admit to that, a big chunk of their knowledge learned from all these experiments and dangerous researches they were forced to either witness or lead. It was unethical and terrible, but...

That dangerous side of medicine, it was an interesting one– and if researched in proper surroundings, the results could benefit everyone! From finding out new poison antidotes, to learning about toxins, how human's body functions and so, so many others...

Please, if you ever hear screaming coming from the lower levels of the hospital, don't mind it. You didn't hear it and doctor Lucianna is busy, so it's best you wait here and don't go bothering them. You wanted to talk about that criminal who just... suddenly disappeared, right? A nice chat won't hurt anyone.

MISCELLANEOUS:

━ Lucie is a cane user. They use a cane majority of the time, even in Penacony, but they don't need it always. Some days are better, some days are worse. Nonetheless, they keep it around all the time because their cane, in reality, is also a concealed blade. Great to defense!

━ Despite what one might think, they genuinely are a nice, sweet person, always willing to help, sometimes they even appear quite naive and stupid but don't believe it, Lucie is far away from being a little, naive sweetheart. Although, that attitude stays even when they are experimenting on someone... it's unsettling, sometimes.

━Their work schedule is chiller than a normal doctor's though. They are allowed to have more free time and they don't have to be at the hospital all the time. It's because their health is already quite poor and they tend to overwork themselves, so they more time to rest, to be able to perform their duties.

━ Close with Aventurine, their relationship is... interesting to say the least. For sure Lucie is his little lucky charm (meaning, more of a bodyguard and someone to bother while gambling all his money away) but they also are his sound of reason, always complaining at him to stop gambling so much, you're going to do something stupid and finally lose a game and, please, stop spending so much on me, I have no ways of paying you back anymore...

━ They enjoy researching on medicine, toxins, antidotes and poisons a lot. Genuinely they do. It's an interesting topic and they are quite good at that! Lucie did, in fact, made their own medicine after all...

━ Their post attack animation is literally them spinning their cane on the back of their hand. It's a little extra. A little fancy.

A/N NOTES: ueue. it is a little rough YES but im currently going through a writer block so dont mind the roughness HAHAHA im gonna... add more stuff one day. lucie's still kind of a wip so that too. anywyahashagsh introductions done!! voicelines next. also, have a lucie picrew as i struggle with their outfit and full design </3 have a great day everyone my back HURTS also i decided to not describe their personality just yet... because i dont like doing that. yeah im really gonna give u guys more lucie lore WHEN IM DONE WORKING ON THEM ok bye fr

#to the new beginning 𓆩⟡𓆪 the doctor #dxddjkdfsdfhfsnfb n #my nail got stuck in the keyboard.#anyways.. lucie. lucie baby u need therapy

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yakuzabrainrotlive · 1 month ago

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So uhhh. Saejima's part. Yeah. How do I put this...

It really didn't do it for me, personally? 😭 There are some very good moments there, truly! I just. Don't have a lot so say about it. I played 'till before the kidnapping thing.

First, we gotta get the most important part out of the way:

Saejima's lucky plushie for the game will be Donpen-kun!

Somehow ended up going on a big tangent about Majima's situation right at the beginning.

I guess this crisis is understandable, though. Tojo is (at least outwardly) bigger than ever, the Hills project is done, Saejima's not on death row anymore and knows the story behind '85. He's at a crossroads right now; what does he want to do now? He lived for more than two decades waiting for this whole thing to come to a head, it did, and now there's... options. And time is ticking - they're not getting any younger. And there's no going back to how things were before shit it the fan, so something new is gonna have to happen.

Kiryu's midlife crisis? Kinda expected. Majima's midlife crisis? Did NOT expect it. I love these moments where we get to hear what's truly going on in his head, even just a little bit. He's a deeper thinker than the people around him would ever give him credit for.

I mean.... not sure if Majima is talking about physical or mental slowness taking over, probably both? He's so used to there constantly being a big stressor somewhere, always having so much to do, having to be on guard. When it's all starting to simmer down after all those years and there's this stability (though it's fragile), I feel like everything WOULD start to catch up to him and he'd really start to FEEL those years. Stress has such a massive effect on your physical and mental well-being that I shouldn't really be surprised this kind of crash is happening.

Physical side? He canonically doesn't eat very well (at least not in Kiwami, he says he practically lives on fast food) and he probably kept having nightmares like in Y0, so sleep is probably not good either. I'm also a firm believer that the year in The Hole left a physical impact as well, maybe some chronic pain that's really making itself known as he's aged? All that on top of, well, just natural aging.

I can see why he'd feel he's no longer got the same OOMPH as before. And while I can't relate to this in terms of aging, my own chronic illness has significant effects on my ability to function at times, and it can be very frustrating to feel your body just... not doing as well as before.

I'm eager to see how this develops.

OKAY, SAEJIMA. Uhhh. Prison! The Joint! Not gonna lie, I was kind of... bored with the prison section.

I like the fact that the game took the time to address the anxiety of prisoners who are getting out after long sentences. They have no idea what kind of world is waiting out there. Will they manage to get a job? Will they become homeless? That's terrifying!

But in terms of the rest of it... Personally I didn't really click with Saejima's cellmates and it was a whole lot of... running around this empty map. If I'd managed to grow fond of, say Baba, the whole stabbing mystery would have kept me more engaged. They did add those dream/imagination sequences, but it was. Ehhh.

WE GOT SAEJIMA KAROKE!! And I did somehow get the Bakamitai full score while on that imagination date with Kaguya! Saejima's singing voice is gorgeous.

When the plot kicked in, it got interesting for a bit. They're really trying to get rid of all the past and current MVPs of the Tojo Clan real fast. Very aggressive, feels more and more like Omi is behind this and one of them is pulling strings in the Tojo side of things.

Thank you for everything Kosaka, my king. You will not be forgotten🫡

Lord almighty, up in the heavens... you better not make me drive this contraption or I swear-

*inhuman screeching sound* NOOOOOOOOOOO 😭😭😭😭😭

Huh. Honestly at a loss for words, here. That's a whole bear.

...

I mean, sure!! Why not! Kiryu took on tigers while healing from a stab wound, this might as well happen.

VERY niche reference that only people from the Nordics will probably understand, but. A huge man-eating bear terrorizing a remote village? And a badass, gruff loner of an old hunter has beef with that specific bear? What's next, a young akita inu comes to fight it with a pack of 1000+ fellow dogs and eventually lops its head off with a supernatural technique?

please watch the Silver Fang anime it's nuts

I honestly don't have ANYTHING else to say about the hunting village section😭 We hunted, we talked, we left. We chilled. Literally and in terms of vibes.

I LOVED the look of Tsukimino! My favourite town in terms of looks and vibe this far. But then I realized how hellish that town is to move around in because of all the narrow streets and only being able to move across roads in specific spots and angles. Made the town feel very small. It's a shame.

Bear 2 was a very funny addition. Got a genuine laugh out of me. I guess it's only fair; Kiryu fought two tigers, why should Saejima get away with only one bear?

Kidnapping plot is sounding INSANE right now, how the HELL will they pull this one off.

#yakuza spoilers #yakuza 5 spoilers #yakuza thoughts

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hellsfirekeepsyouwarm · 2 years ago

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Don't Come To Me Pt. 6.

Heyheyhey! New part is here, now with the one and only Frank.

Frank Castle X F!Reader, mentions of Billy Russo X F!Reader

Warnings: Language is all i think, no Billy this time srry

Summary: Reader and Frank have a little time together, sharing thoughts and feelings.

Taglist: @gwynethhberdara @icarus-isflying @intothesoul @malfoyeyes @padfooteyes @readers-posts

Part 5.

His eyes are sparkling in the overly annoying yellow light, giving them a mischievous glint with a hint of softness. A now constant half smirk plastering his freshly shaven face, his ear perked up by the scandalous tone of the drunk David. He is putting up a show, probably this is all the fun he got in the last year, and that could be the reason for Frank to just let it happen. Anyone could tell that he needs it too. He needs some laugh, some lighthearted banter, hugs and gentle touches. You tried your best to provide some relief, talk about nonsense, being physically close to him, offer him random snacks because you liked his deep laughter when you pulled out M&M's from your back pocket in ridiculous moments. Nothing can make you happier than those laughs. And the guilt eats you away for it. Every time you lay your eyes on Frank Castle, the whole wide world narrows down to one, to only one person, and it's him. Not the man who brings you roses, swears on his own life to keep you happy, rails you like no other man ever. Not Billy, but his best friend. The best friend who he thinks is long gone, buried six feet under.

"Where's your head at, Sweetheart?" Frank's face is full of curiosity, maybe some concern, he caught you zoned out like someone in hypnosis, you eyes blurry from staring into nothingness.

Before you could attempt to think about a good answer David appears next to you, an intoxicated smile on his face, eyebrow moving up and down in a teasing way.

"I bet you think 'bout pretty boy who is waiting for ya at home huh" The weirdness of David's drunken words are too funny to react any kind of way than laughing, so you just do that not escaping the awfully warm feeling on your cheeks. "Ohhhh i can see, i can SEE!" He yells the last letters as if he solved the mystery of the holy grail.

"Do not worry, i understand. He is really beautiful. Truly." He's gazing off into the distance, over your's and Frank's shoulder, over this little bunker, completely lost in his cloudy mind. You mutter a quiet 'okay', seeing how smitten is David with Billy's look.

When you turn to Frank again, thinking where you lost the conversation, his tense demeanor knocks out your thoughts again of your head. He's looking at David annoyed, wanting him gone, at least a couple feet so he can hum his radio pop songs away from the two of you. You can't blame him, you like David, but you get too little time with Frank these days. So you try to make the best out of those times.

Frank turns back to you, the same tension in his muscles, jaw locked tight, eyes furrowed. This is what people see when meeting the Punisher? They see a body built like a weapon, hardened face with no other emotion than rage? Little moments like this shows that side of him, the side he keeps at bay, neatly tucked away in front of you.

He softens up when his brown eyes finds their way back to yours. He looks at you puzzled, David's humming a Backstreet Boys song in the background making you smile at him, which he returns in defeat.

He pick up his mostly untouched glass of cheap whikey, gulping down half of it in an elegant way only he can manage in cargo pants and a plain stained t-shirt.

"Why don't you go home?" He asks, confusing you with it.

"What do you mean? You said you are free tonight." Your genuine confusion makes him smirk.

"C'mon Y/N. Don't tell me you don't wanna be with Billy. You should be at home with him." He states. You know he's right. You should be yearning for that. And still, you are out in the night, with two officially dead person deep in some corruption shit.

Your smile dies off, thinking about Billy. He texted you a couple hours back, when the night was young. You could hear his voice reading the message. He's working, he's gonna be late, can he call you when he's done for the day, can he come over, can he make love to you? Words dripping from honey, from love, from adoration, from obsession even.

"We can have time of our own, Frank. I still have a life ya know." You sound a little too cold, and he notices it right away. The discomfort flashing on your face when your thoughts consume you.

"What's wrong?" He asks, leaning his body forward, his eyes burning in fire. "What did he do?"

What did he do? Nothing if you are being honest. If someone is doing something wrong it's you.

"Frank, stop. Nothing, he did nothing, okay?" You try to soothe him, but his body stays put, leaning into your space, eyes still searching for the truth behind your words. "It's just..."

"What is it?" He's so eager to know. If it wasn't for the deadstare, you would think he's just hungry for gossip, for drama, for housewife secrets.

"It made me think. It's silly truly. Now i think about it before saying it, it's just so childish." You utter in one breath, looking wide eyed on the man in front of you. he did not loose interest, his focus is still on you and what are you about to say, despite the very much annoying David singing Beyoncé in the background. "It made me wonder. Why now? We did this cat and mouse game for years now, and it never changed. We never changed. I just..." You do sound a little paranoid. And in this moment as you say it out loud it sounds even more ridiculous. "Suddenly he wants to be with me, wants to have a life with me, wants me."

Frank doesn't seem to be uncomfortable, at least not like you imagined him talking about matters like your business of heart. His jaws painfully shut together, you can see him clutch his tooth together as he looks away from you.

"I know i said bad things about his ways back in the day, yeah? I know. But don't hold 'em against him. He's fucking right about loving you sweetheart okay? Don't think about it too much because it's tend to be real messy up there for you." You taps your temple gently, the touch giving you goosebumps all over your skin.

"Yeah yeah i know. I guess i wanted to see some sense in something that is far from making sense." You smile, your brain still ringing the alarms.

"Love works like that." He says with a halfhearted smile, eyes not leaving yours. A for a moment you just gaze into each others soul through wandering eyes. You didn't had time to think about Frank too much. Sure you had questions, had fears and scares when he showed up blooded and bruised, but everything was so blurred from the shock and joy you felt seeing him again when you already grieved the man.

You are so much older now, more mature, wiser. But your childlike crush for him stayed the same, and the first time in god knows how long the familiar nervousness in you tummy started again.

"I missed you, you know?" You blurt out, regretting it instantly, but you still show him a somewhat proper smile, shielding your face with your hair.

He moves closer face mere inches away, his hand slipping to the back of your neck, pulling your head towards him. He connects your foreheads together gently, his warm palm stayin on your bare skin under your hoodie, thumb slightly caressing your pulsing skin.

"I've missed you too."

#frank castle x reader #frank castle imagine #billy russo x reader #billy russo imagine #frank castle

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