#like he was not bad I am NOT an Adam anti

[sscrambledmeggss]

Coming out as a Walter anti, I hate him

[spielen-verrueckt]

Kyle Adam Carrozza manipulated me and my family. He manipulated everyone to have his back. He has a habit of lovebombing people to get them to trust him and them sneaks his way into overstepping boundaries, and according to some people now, molesting them.

I knew him IRL for a decade and now I feel extremely disgusted that i knew him since I was a kid. I wish my parents and I never met him. He is an evil monster, worse than John K and Dan Schneider. I almost worked on an animation project with him. Specifically the Moobeard reboot. Thank God I didn't, and I dodged a bullet. He was my only animation connection so I felt like I had to be on good terms with him, and that's how he keeps relationships- by holding you hostage and dangling an animation-industry carrot above the heads of young artists like a starved horse.

I was privately in the defense of him before because everyone I knew was and how they described the Ang controversy didn't seem that bad at the time. but I never spoke about it publicly, only with close friends. I told a mutual on my stance on his controversy and they harassed and blocked me over it but it turned out they were in the right all along. They're having the last laugh right now, whoopty do.

Being a shota/lolicon is disgusting but it's a coughing baby compared to owning actual CSEM. If drawing that stuff prevents real crime then I can't say I'm completely against it existing, as fucked up as that sounds. I'm already sorta neutral on the whole proship/anti thing and I don't think I'm ever gonna talk about that kind of topic ever again in fear I'll be seen as someone like Kyle who's hiding skeletons.

I wasn't the only person who knew about his google drive- he talked about it publicly on twitter, which was fucking stupid of him but at least it gives me proof. I am however, for some fucking reason the only one who put 2 and 2 together and realized it could be correlated with his arrest. If you haven't seen my NewGrounds journal, please read it.

When that happened, I gave him the benefit of the doubt and excused it as being either a hack or the same situation with Naoki Saito, who also had his google deleted for a similar reason THE SAME YEAR (it was a false positive)

someone told me that Ang took credit for his google being deleted, but if i'm being honest I think she's talking out of her ass. She also believes aliens visited her. I'm almost positive that Google tripped a hash and investigated privately, leading to his arrest. but again it's just a theory. if not, it's a wild coincidence.

I am so, so deeply sorry and I wish the best for the victims. Outing myself as his ex friend and providing more evidence against him will be my form of repent.

[kitkatopinions]

When people talk about how "rwde is mad that RWBY subverts expectations" I wonder how much of what's considered subverting expectations is actually ignoring set up, doing things out of nowhere, and actually doing a popular and very much so expected thing.

Like don't get me wrong, I do think sometimes people have ideas for what RWBY should've been and then think that it was more set up then it actually was. Like, people who took Blake saying she grew up outside the kingdoms and had to learn to fight to mean "I am an orphan and spent my whole life on the streets" that then got mad when Blake had pretty big house and parents. I might agree that RWBY perhaps shouldn't have given Blake the privileges they gave her specifically because of how they decided to use her to tell the other Faunus to stop being mean to their oppressors (though I'd sooner throw that part out than get rid of Blake being the daughter of a leader with a big house,) but I don't think it was pulling the rug out from under people the way some people do.

However, then you have things like Adam, where some people in RWDE are saying "he was set up as this interesting character who would be an ideological foil for Blake that cared about the cause and his people, and it felt like he'd be used as a way to talk about the injustice in the world of Remnant and then was reduced to nothing but a girl-obsessed hate sink two dimensional incel" and some anti-rwde people are hitting back with "you're just upset that the edgy bad-boy isn't getting redeemed, you just wanted Adam to be Zuko, but RWBY subverted your expectations by not redeeming him and instead giving Ilia the redemption arc, and giving Blake and Yang the sympathy."

And there's a lot to unpack, there. Including the fact that redemption arcs and sympathy aren't a zero-sum game in fiction and as someone who loves both redemption arcs and when characters get justified sympathy, it's frustrating when people act like there isn't enough redemption to go around as if it's a pie and Adam getting a piece of it means Ilia doesn't get any.

But more to the point, A. I at least have zero interest in Adam being a Zuko, because so much of Zuko's redemption arc hinged on Zuko confronting his and his people's role in oppression. Adam is oppressed. Zuko was scarred by an abusive father and banished from home, Adam was branded like cattle by a supremacist who he was working for as a child laborer. Although both are incredibly sympathetic, they're incredibly different. Whether or not the writers were trying to harken back to Zuko (which I believe they were,) they seemed to completely miss the differences between the two characters, and also deciding to 'subvert expectations' when the circumstances they themselves wrote were so different is a bad look at best. As if they couldn't have 'subverted expectations' with a different character like Cardin or Jacques or even Roman Torchwick, that wasn't a member of their in-universe oppressed minority group.

B. A member of an oppressed people group that's been hurt by the oppressors of the world and yet spends their time committing horrible cruel acts that force the heroes to stand against them is not some never before heard of thing. In fact, it's very common. A revolutionary supposedly fighting for equality that's actually hurting the people he's supposedly fighting for is a pretty regular every day thing. People have literally been criticizing how it's misused and usually racist propaganda (usually written by white people) since long before RWBY was even concepted. Adam isn't a proper subversion of anything, in my opinion, because you can't do the common thing and then say you subverted expectations by not doing the less common thing. Which in this case, the less common thing would actually be to make the oppressed person who had been branded and was shown fighting for the rights of his people to actually be a nuanced and complicated character who does deserve sympathy and could be redeemed.

C. It might just be me, but if you're going to 'subvert expectations' then the thing you write instead of the expectation had better be pretty freaking good. Because sometimes the expectation is there because it just works well. Like in a group of heroes, you expect them to develop a friendship. If people want to subvert expectations by instead having them hate each other, the story better be golden because the reason people tend to expect friendship is that it's usually much easier to connect to character dynamics when they actually like each other. If you're going to write a story where hope is a central theme, but you want to subvert expectations by making a sympathetic and cool character with a personal connection to the mains look like they're gonna get redeemed but then instead make them just the worst person imaginable, then you better do it super well and make him instead a great well-rounded nuanced and fun to hate villain. So not only do we have to pay attention to why the writers shouldn't have gone that route for Adam, we gotta look at the quality of what they did with it, and... Nope. It sucked. Adam was paper thin and horribly voice acted and honestly if he'd never attacked in V6 nothing would've really changed because it had no real consequences that couldn't have been better achieved in a different way, and introducing his branding scar in the same scene he got stabbed was purely for shock value, and nothing came of his character, and idk if Ruby ever even learned his name on screen or Weiss knew anything about him, and it was so badly done. If you're going to 'subvert expectations,' you gotta do it well, or people are always going to want the thing they expected in the beginning instead. Unfortunately, the RWBY writers didn't write Adam well at all. So I for one can't blame anyone for saying 'honestly, I wish they'd gone with the other thing.'

D. Back to 'sometimes when people say subverting expectations, they really mean ignored set up.' With Adam in particular, I do believe that he was always meant to be a bad guy who did bad cruel things from the very first trailer he appeared in, but that doesn't at all mean that set up wasn't ignored. From Blake talking about him as a mentor, to her crediting him with the Grimm masks, to the ideological differences, to Cinder literally having to threaten and coerce him into working with her on screen, the set up indicated that at the very least, this would be a complicated and nuanced 'villain with a point' and that point was going to matter and be addressed. The set up was that Cinder's coercion was going to be addressed and would matter. The set up was that Blake's complicated feelings about Adam and her desire to help her people and her later established care and compassion for Ilia (who may I remind people is at least just as bad as seasons 1-3 Adam in at least attempt if not execution,) would lead somewhere when it came to Adam. The set up was that seeing a child laborer literally branded on the face with the logo of WEISS'S COMPANY would lead to big discussions and some sort of recognition of just how bad the current system is and how bad the SDC itself as always been. And instead Weiss as far as we know never even heard about it and continued on being angry that she wasn't set to be CEO and calling her grandfather a hero and Blake was completely disinterested in attending a rally against Jacques Schnee and teased Weiss about her family owning half of Atlas. Like ???

E. Doing things out of nowhere is also not subverting expectations. In regards to Adam, this looks like randomly making him totally obsessed with Blake enough that he stalks her for weeks when he literally let her go repeatedly before that. Doing things out of nowhere is making Adam not care an ounce about his people in order to do whatever Salem says when we saw him reject Cinder outright and need to be coerced with threats to his people. Those aren't subverting expectations, that's just doing one thing and then retconning the character to do something out of character.

This post turned out to be mostly about Adam, but there's tons of examples of this, like people saying RWDE are mad that the writers 'subverted expectations' by making Ironwood turn evil when we were sitting there like 'the fact that he wasn't evil was subverting expectations in the first place! And they had to throw V3 out the window to get where they were in V8! And it was super badly done!' People just throw around 'subverting expectations' when it comes to RWBY because it sounds a lot better than 'flying by the seats of their pants doing whatever pops into their heads with no care or consideration towards set-up or emotional pay off' but that's it, that's what the RWBY writers seem to do. When I expect something to happen in RWBY, it's because it's the natural thing that makes sense to happen, and in their supposed effort to 'subvert expectations,' the writers instead made a show with no consequences where you can't expect the writers to make anything that happens matter and you can't trust what's in the show because the writers might say sike and retcon it. It's endlessly frustrating to be like 'hey was any of what was in the show going to matter' and then have people say 'you're just mad because RWBY subverted your expectations.' RWBY subverted my expectation that the show would be good, how about that?

You know, if the show actually was interested in subverting expectations, Jaune wouldn't be in the show nearly as much and he'd be more gender-non-conforming and be a support healer role instead of the man now with like twenty years of experience on the mains who always has his trauma get plenty of focus and gets away with screaming in Ruby's face that she's responsible for all bad things while he mourns the three different women that were shoved in the fridge for the sake of his character development. They could've started with making the white straight cis able-bodied not-faunus man actually not be a basic underdog-protagonist turned Michael-Scarn-esque tragic hero that Weiss lusts after, but whoops. Like what am I supposed to think, that they're super interested in subverting expectations for the sake of women when Jaune is right there guzzling up screen time? Nah babes.

(Before someone comes in here talking about Adam-obsessed fan boys, I do not even like Adam, canon Adam is not only gross but far too two-dimensional for me to even enjoy, and my own ideas for rewrites involve me boiling Adam down to a concept and building him up again as if he was a different character as much 'Adam' as Ruby is Red Riding Hood. Nobody accuse me of being an Adam-obsessed dudebro or I will lose it. Because that's another thing that a lot of anti-RWDE people seem to do, is decide that the only reason anyone would ever talk about problems with Adam is because they're an obsessed incel man. And meanwhile I'm over here as a bi-women who dislikes Adam partially because he reminds me of my controlling 'my happiness is your responsibility' ex-boyfriend who we - long story - thought might've stabbed someone with a sword once. So yeah, not an Adam fanboy lol.)

[howlingday]

The Hardest Thing to Say

Jaune: (Reading)

Cinder: (Climbing in through window) Well, hello there~.

Jaune: Ugh...

Cinder: So, I noticed you haven't been replied to a single meme I've sent you so I was wondering why you've been ignoring me.

Jaune: I thought me not saying "ha ha" was enough to get across that I didn't want to talk right now.

Cinder: Oh, come the fuck on, Arc, we're just going through a rough patch. Besides, you always want to hear from me~.

Jaune: (Sighs) Okay, Cinder. What do you want?

Cinder: I want to feel like I'm earning this partnership, so get your hands off that book and on my ass so you can SMACK it~!

Jaune: Wow. How poetic. I bet you really thought I'd be putty in your hands by now, huh?

Cinder: Er... Right, so... Okay, that was a shitty way for me to say it, but you usually like it when I dirty talk to you.

Jaune: (Scowls)

Cinder: (Groans) Come on! We don't words! We sex!

Jaune: This might be a surprise to you, Cinder, but I don't want "to sex." In fact, I don't even want to "words" with you! So would you please respect that?!

Cinder: Oh, don't be like that, Arc. (Leans, Pulls collar) Besides, you know you like to see this~.

Jaune: (Cringing) Seeing you is hard for me right now! I already feel bad about last night, and the fact that I'm getting an invite to this "Anti-Cinder" party as a "guest of honor" for being your most recent ex!

Cinder: ANTI-CINDER?! WHO THE FUCK IS BEHIND THIS?!

Jaune: It's just this immature get together. Honestly, it sounds like a load of baloney.

Cinder: Yes, yes, truly a real smorgasbord of processed meat! Let me see that!

Jaune: It was nice to get an invite, though. Maybe I should check it out.

Cinder: (Opens card)

Dearest Jaune Arc, You are cordially invited to join us as a guest of honor to celebrate having your fucking heart stomped to mush by Cinder Fall~! It is with great pride and honor that I extend this invitation, as the most recent ex, to the Ever After and indulge in our shared hatred of that stupid cunt! Eagerly awaiting the arrival of our "Guest of Honor,"

Neopolitan

Cinder: NEO?! Of course that fucking creep would...

Jaune: It's funny, though... Why would you have an entire party dedicated to hating you of all people?

Cinder: Because they're all bitter that I am simply too wild to tame~.

Jaune: You really think that's all it is?

Cinder: Of course! They're all jealous that I moved on and they didn't.

Jaune: Oh! That makes sense since YOU are the one who's breaking people's hearts!

Cinder: If by "bweaking pepoo's hots~" you mean I "end is shit before it becomes shit," then yes, and honestly, these people should be thanking me because everyone would be better off single.

Jaune: ...Heh. Yeah. You're right. Everyone would be better off single. So, why are you here, Cinder~?

Cinder: E- I- I am here because you still need to realize how good some angry revenge sex would feel right now!

Jaune: Oh, beat it, Cinder! ...NOW.

Cinder: Why?!

Jaune: Because I'm tired of this, Cinder! I don't like how you're talking to me!

Cinder: Oh, give me a fucking break, Arc! You know this has always been a fantasy of yours! You want me to be right on top of you so I can give you the best two hours of your life~!

Jaune: (Walks away) Stop it!

Cinder: You know I'm right! You love the idea of me being your little lapdog for you to show off so you can prove that there's good in everyone!

Jaune: I don't want you to be my lapdog! How many times do I have to fucking-?! When have I ever-?! (Exhales) You're just like Adam, you know that?! You know, the same guy who tried to kill me and YOU didn't even bother coming to help me yourself! Remember?!

Cinder: I am NOTHING like-! I-I didn't know he could-! Hey, I stopped him the first time!

Jaune: The first time?!

Cinder: ...Yes, when yo- Oh... Oh, shit, did I not-

Jaune: You KNEW someone was trying to kill me?

Cinder: ...I stopped him! And I didn't think you could actually get hurt!

Jaune: (Walks to the window, Leans on sill)

Cinder: You had aura! You have your semblance! If Mercury and I could kick his ass on our own, then you could definitely-

Jaune: Yeah, you're right! Because I'm the big huntsman hero and I shouldn't trust an evil person to stop an evil person, right?

Cinder: And there it is! About time!

Jaune: Oh, that's all you were really here for! (Pushes to face Cinder) Trying to play out this idea you have that I'm some beacon of light who's trying to force you to be a good guy, but I'm NOT! Why would I risk my career, my LIFE, to spend time with you, to help you?! You don't owe me those things, but you can't just ignore all of it!

Cinder: ...You know, Jaune, I spent the entire morning listening to love songs...

Jaune: (Cinder takes his hand)

Cinder: ...and that was still the SAPPIEST THING I'VE EVER HEARD!

Jaune: (Pulls hand away) ...Do you ever feel bad for the people you've hurt? Have you ever said sorry ONCE in your life?

Cinder: WHAT, YOU THINK I CAN'T FUCKING APOLOGIZE?! FOR WHAT?! YOU WANT ME TO SAY, "Oh, I'm sorry that I thought this whole time someone as wonderful as you could never love someone as awful as me and I allow my self-loathing to stop me from apologizing to anyone I've ever cared about!"

Jaune: ...Er- Yeah. That.

Cinder: ...

Jaune: ...

Cinder: ...WELL, FUCK YOU!

Jaune: (Leaves)

Cinder: I COULD SAY SORRY IF I WANTED TO! JUST YOU FUCKING WATCH! I SORRIED RUBY SO HARD, SHE CRIED! AND I CAN SORRY MORE PEOPLE EXCEPT YOU BECAUSE I DON'T OWE YOU DICK!

Cinder: (Huffs) Everyone... But you... (Leaves)

[idv-sunsxin3]

Horropedia // Dating Headcanons

Note// First Reverse: 1999 writing. A bit suggestive in some parts. This is my version of Horropedia, so if you don’t like it,,,, you might as well have to write your own because this is meant for my self-indulgence;; sowwy <//3

// preferably female s/o- gender neutral is also okay since I didn’t exactly mention a specific gender :)

As a strange autistic guy, I just imagine him to be the type of guy who probably have indirectly confessed to you earlier before you can even realize that months after- like you're just laid down on an armchair and you suddenly connected lines on the previous lines you once heard him before-

"Ah, hey! I've been waiting all my life to meet someone like you, so I had to come and say hello."

...he literally just say a simple remark with that smile as he gifted you a spirit catcher pistol- and then left....

Sometimes, you might not understand him. But you eventually asked him out on a date (in a normal way for once-).

"Oh? A date? Great! Let's go get coffee together. " :))

Little do you know, he also plans to have a ghost hunting date after that---

___

Kissing scenes in horror films? Horropedia at first felt a bit skeptical about them, finding that unnecessary... Until he got a crush on you, and then FELL for you - That's when he lowkey wondered in his autism brain... how would a kiss with you feels like?

Oh gosh, so many possibilities;;;

Horropedia would slowly realize the fact that he would unconsciously check his mouth breathing and fix his hair a bit whenever he spots you entering the room. "Who knows when that kiss scene happened cough cough -"/hj

There was a time Horropedia sneakily slipped during those ironically cute kissing scenes in a horror movie.. You may think you would just slip away from the unknown opportunity he would be searching for - But no, you wouldn't even get the peace to resume watching or have time to recover from a jumpscare that happened few minutes ago when there is this silly dork softly nibbling and smooching on your face and neck like that;;;

aaaand now you're making out with him in the middle of the movie ..

It seems there are now more reasons for him to ask you to stay over. ;)

He wants to impress you so bad ever since the moment he heard about you - You just happened to be... ordinary? But at the same time, refreshing... someone who easily connects with almost anyone.

Darn, I think you’re made for him. ☺️ (lol)

At first, he wanted to be the Mr. Mysterious and only introduced himself to you as "Horropedia. "... At some certain point after, he would  bashfully let you call him "Joshua." Just don't get too cocky...-/ih

If you're just as comfortable with dark humor and other kinds of morbid stuff, there is this small scenario where you and Horropedia would roleplay a bit as to help him make up stories involving these morbid antagonists and anti-heroes...- He would be kinda a bit down bad if you say Wednesday Adams stuff technically./hj

He is not sure If he has the right to die or laugh when he gets called "Joshy"... it's cringe, but he finds your silly demeanor very cute and funny.

You happen to be a big listener when it comes to horror movies, horror stories, and horror video games- whatever horropedia rambles at you at 3 am. as if it is a nearly daily basis/ih

He loves sharing hobbies with you, even cherishing the moments when you get to do whatever activities with him that are close to his interests and what he's passionate about...

You can already tell he's not interested in anything else other than that sense of thrill he has for phenomenon or violent drama... but he'll try his best to be flexible when it comes to giving you quality time... Like crafting, cooking, maybe painting?

You might know what he will create in his own hands...- ghost cupcakes, a sculpture of Friday the 13th's killer, Michael Myers mask---

Jumpscares are out of date for him, of course, but then... he still watches those classical horror movies once in a while since they're pretty much fundamental to the art of fear.

Ironically... He does like surprise back touches! Well... As long as it doesn't have to imply his poor posture, back hugs are good to go.

He finds it pleasant to have you sit next to him or on his lap as he plays those Indie horror games(?), "mmmm... Dark deception? World of Horror? Resident Evil? The Last of Us? What about Outlast? What do you think, Babe? :))"

FNAF would be obviously a breeze for him... Bro, imagine him going crazy about fnaf lore, hahahha-

DDLC gave him mixed feelings. He is half glad his baby is not that mad crazy because of that/ih

LITTLE NIGHRMARESSSS- Man, imagine him having these silly moments with how he just concerningly reacts so happily at a kid eating a gnome who just offered a sausage oh gosh-

Watching horror movies with him would be like watching a live commentary channel as you feel a slim hand rubbing your waist throughout the movie.

You might have mixed reactions alongside him when accidentally encountering sex scenes on horror movies...- things might get awkward but he would make sure to close your eyes if you don't like to see that kind of stuff- intercourse is not the option,,,, mass arson it is/ih

I can only imagine Horropedia calling you either your name, Babe, Baby, or  Boo (NOT PUN INTENDED I SWEAR FJNFNF;;) Is usually your name being called normally. Unless he is so so happy,,, or is because he just did something you probably not going to like~ 😇✨️

“Is your name Boo? Because you’re making me scream in delight.” ♥️

Oh boy-

[fortheloveofwonderland]

But it’s Better if You Do | SR x Fem! Reader

Summary - the Blue Siren strip club is the last place Spencer Reid wants to spend his birthday. And the absolute last thing he needs is to fall for you, the magnetic exotic dancer who Morgan and Luke pay to give him a birthday dance.

A/N - as a rule, I am not technically writing Spencer x Reader right now but this is for @imagining-in-the-margins damsel in distress challenge although it’s a very vague fit. Kind of anti damsel in distress? I don’t know, let’s just roll with it. Candy Shop by 50 Cent is the song used in Magic Mike XXL when Adam Rodriguez does his lil sexy dance so the song choice was an homage to that. Loosely based around the Panic at the Disco song “But it’s Better if You Do.”

Pairing - Spencer Reid x Exotic Dancer Fem! Reader

Category - fluff I suppose? Maybe mild angst. Happy ending.

CW - exotic dancer reader, Morgan and Luke are bad wingmen, hints at lesbian Emily, strip clubs, snarky Spencer, drinking, swearing, Spencer and his inappropriate erection, brief mentions of masturbation, making out.

WC - 8.2k

Oh, isn't this exactly where you'd like me?

I'm exactly where you'd like me, you know.

Praying for love and a lap dance,

And paying in naivety.

The last place Spencer Reid ever expected to find himself on his fortieth birthday was at the Blue Siren Club just off of Dupont Circle. For starters, Spencer wasn’t a big drinker so going to a bar didn’t appeal to him on any other given night, let alone his birthday, but there was much more to the Blue Siren than just being your run of the mill club.

The Blue Siren was well known as being one of the most reputable strip clubs in the district. According to the extensive research Spencer had done when he found out he was to be coming here, it was one of the more exclusive clubs, and if Morgan was to be believed it was popular among law enforcement and other government officials due to its clandestine nature.

From the outside, the Blue Siren looked just like a normal club. If you were to pass it by you may not even glance up at the exposed brick facade and black front door. In the lone window in the front sat a small blue neon sign boosting the club's name and that was all. You wouldn’t be alone in walking right past the establishment without batting an eyelid. 

When Luke had suggested the idea to spend his birthday here, Spencer’s immediate reaction had been laughter, because it had to be a joke, right? Strip clubs and Spencer Reid were not a combination anyone who knew him would put together, surely? 

“Why are you laughing?” Luke frowned at him, folding his arms across his chest. 

“Because you’re making a joke?” 

“No, I’m not.” 

“You’re not?” Spencer’s laughter came to a sudden halt and he stared at Luke in disbelief. “You…you seriously think that’s how I want to spend my birthday?” 

“I was talking to Morgan and-“

“No sentence in the history of the English language that starts with “I was talking to Morgan” has ever had a happy ending.” Spencer scoffed. 

“It’s the happy ending part we’re trying to achieve.” Luke smirked at him, a playful hint in his eye that caused Spencer to swallow thickly at the implication. 

“Y-you…I…” 

“When was the last time you got laid, Reid?” 

Spencer felt the moment his cheeks burnt with an intense embarrassment. In all the years he’d known Luke they had never once discussed their sex lives. In fact, Spencer made it a rule to never discuss his sex life with anyone. 

“That’s a deeply personal question.” He shrunk in on himself. 

“Which is Spencer Reid for, it’s been a while.” Luke smiled knowingly. 

“I…I don’t have to answer that.” 

“You kinda just did.” 

“Regardless,” Spencer shook his head, trying to steer the conversation off of his sex life, or lack thereof. “Strip clubs aren’t brothels. The women don’t sleep with their customers.”

“Morgan and I decided it was slightly more appropriate than buying you a hooker.” 

If Spencer thought he was embarrassed before, he was now absolutely mortified. 

“I don’t need help getting “laid”, as you so eloquently put it.” Spencer shook his head, turning back to his desk and sorting through some papers to distract himself.

“Don’t you?” An amused voice came from behind him and Spencer groaned, running his hands through his hair. He turned slowly in his chair to see Emily standing over him, an almost delighted look in her eyes. “What are we talking about?”

“Morgan and I want to take Reid to Blue Siren for his birthday next week.” Luke filled her in.

“Oh that place is great!” She beamed. “Can I come?”

“Where are we going?” Rossi seemingly appeared as if from nowhere with his coffee and newspaper. 

Spencer grumbled, face palming his hand as the group around him gathered.

“We’re taking Spence to Blue Siren for his birthday.” Emily happily told him.

“Blue Siren? Huh,” Rossi nodded his head. “I haven’t been there for years, count me in. I’ll even see if Hotch wants to join.”

“For the love of god.” Spencer muttered against his hand. No one seemed to hear him and if they did, they ignored him.

“Join what? What did I miss?” Garcia came tottering in on her too high heels, laptop balanced precariously in the crook of her arm.

“Apparently the kid wants to go to a strip club for his birthday.” Rossi informed her.

“No, No.” Spencer shook his head, looking up at them. “The kid does not want to go to a strip club for his birthday.”

“Oh isn’t it the big four-oh?” Garcia bounced up and down in excitement. “You have to do something special for it!”

“I highly doubt a strip club can be deemed as special.” Spencer rolled his eyes.

“Strip club?” Matt strolled into the conversation now and Spencer wanted to just vanish into thin air.

“Yeah we’re taking Reid for his birthday. Want in?” Luke asked him.

“As long as no one ever tells Kristy.” Matt chuckled. 

“What aren’t we telling Kristy?” Tara popped her head up from her desk, Spencer didn’t even know she was there. 

“That we’re going to a strip club for Reid’s birthday.” Matt offered her a sly smile.

“Oh sweet! Count me in.” She grinned. 

“How about you guys go, since you’re all so excited about it and just tell me how it was? I’ll stay home with a book or something.” Spencer sighed but no one acknowledged him. 

The door opened again and JJ meandered in, all eyes turning to look at her. 

“Uh, hi?” She laughed awkwardly as she walked across the bullpen.

“Have you ever been to a strip club, Jayje?”

Spencer groaned loudly, crumbling in on himself and smacking his head against the hardwood of his desk. Sometimes it was just easier to go along with these things than try to fight them.

And so, only slightly against his will, Spencer let them talk him into spending his birthday in the last place he ever expected to find himself, least of all on his birthday. The whole team was in attendance, plus Morgan and Hotch, he could only assume to have a front row seat to his complete mortification. They met outside the club, waiting for JJ who was late due to the fact she couldn't get Michael to go to sleep. Luke had gone so far as to pick Spencer up from his apartment, which was in the opposite direction, just so the birthday boy wouldn’t have an excuse for ditching them at the last minute.

“Is that really what you’re wearing to go to a strip club, pretty boy?” Morgan nudged Spencer in the arm.

Spencer glanced down at his attire, what he would call a sensible outfit but was clearly not what he was supposed to be wearing given Morgan’s judgemental gaze. It wasn’t a far cry from what he wore everyday, it wasn’t as though Morgan had never seen him dress like this before. He’d donned a perfectly pressed pair of black slacks, pairing them with his old faithful converse, a crisp blue button down and his black Comme Des Garçons cardigan Rossi had gifted him for his birthday a few years ago. He’d decided against a tie, because that seemed too formal for the occasion even for him. 

“What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?” He frowned, pouting a little. 

He quickly eyed up the other men who were all wearing jeans and t-shirts, Rossi and Hotch included. He couldn’t even get started on how strange it was to see Hotch in jeans. 

“You look like a TA.” Matt shrugged. 

“I always look like a TA. Do you guys think I suddenly dress differently outside of work?” He folded his arms.

“I kind of hoped you did.” Luke smirked. 

“Isn’t it supposed to be my birthday?” Spencer grumbled. “I’m already at the last place I want to celebrate so please can we just leave my outfit choices alone?” 

“I think you look dapper.” Tara patted his shoulder like he was her annoying kid brother or something. 

“Thanks?” He pulled a face. 

“And speaking of birthdays!” Garcia was rummaging in her oversized purse before pulling something out. “Voila!”

Spencer frowned at the large, slightly garish, blue and yellow badge proclaiming “Forty Today” in obnoxious bubble font. It was bigger than Garcia’s hand, she surely didn’t expect him to wear that.

“Uh, no offence but there is no way in hell you are getting me to wear that.” He took it from her anyway, slotting it in the front of his satchel. 

“Spoil sport.” Emily chided him. “Anyone would think you don’t like your birthday!”

“I don’t very much like this particular birthday.” He muttered under his breath. “Where is Jennifer? I’d really like to just get this over with.” 

As if on cue, he heard heels on the concrete ground and seconds later the blonde appeared, dragging someone behind her. She smiled as she came round the corner, tugging Will into view under the streetlamp. 

Oh good, more people to witness my humiliation. 

“Hey guys, sorry we’re late!” She gave them apologetic glances. 

“Will, I didn’t know you’d be joining us.” Penelope hugged JJ and then Will.

“You think I was going to sit at home while my wife goes to a strip club?” He chuckled. “I may never get the opportunity to have permission to do this again in my life. Thanks Spence.” 

“You’re so very welcome.” Spencer replied sarcastically. “Can we just get on with this now?�� 

“That’s the spirit.” Luke chuckled, draping his arm around Spencer’s shoulders and leading him through the non-descript door.

Inside a long, narrow corridor stretched out before them, the distant thrums of bass heavy music, causing the floor to feel like it was vibrating beneath him. A burly doorman awaited them, so broad he almost encompassed the entire corridor. 

“Hey man, I have a reservation under Alvez. It's this guy's big four-oh.” Luke gripped Spencer tightly, shaking him a little. 

The doorman glanced down at a piece of paper in his hand, scanning over it for a second before looking back up at the motley crew, clearly trying to discern if he needed to card anyone but it was immediately clear he didn’t. 

“Follow me,” He motioned for them to come with him.

Luke took the lead, dragging Spencer by his hold on his shoulders. The music got louder the further down the black corridor they got. It was dark and Spencer had to squint to see the man only a few feet in front of him, the corridor only lit by a single red light bulb swinging from the low ceiling that Spencer almost had to duck to walk under. 

At the end of the corridor was another door and the music had reached fever pitch at this point. Spencer felt as though he could taste the beat, he could certainly feel it palpitating in his chest. The doorman shoved open the door and Spencer blinked against the sudden wave of lights that smacked against his retinas. 

Luke finally let go of his shoulders, the doorway too narrow for the two of them to pass through together and motioned Spencer in front of him. Spencer stepped into the room, surprised by the sudden change in flooring, casting his eyes down to see a plush burgundy carpet now under foot. He tried not to contemplate how many germs were living in that carpet, how many drinks had been spilled and soaked into it over the years, how many other fluids it might have absorbed on top of it. He was sure this place would light up like a christmas tree under a black light. 

He grimaced, looking back up and following in the doormans footsteps across the room. He tried to keep his eyes straight ahead, desperate not to look around and take in his surroundings but his morbid curiosity got the better of him. 

Admittedly if he’d imagined what the inside of a strip club would look like this would have been plucked straight from his imagination. The main lighting was low, shielding most of the seating area in an almost ominous glow. The booths were made up of plush, gold velvet sofas, large dark oak tables in the centre of them. There was a long bar on one side, made of the same oak only its surface seemed to glitter when the light hit it. Over the back were two large velveteen curtains, concealing what Spencer could only assume was the private dance areas. There were four raised platforms each with their own golden, floor to ceiling pole in the centre, blue spotlights pointed at each one. Each podium had a scantily clad young girl dancing in upon it and Spencer quickly averted his gaze again, not wanting to be seen to objectify them. 

“You know the whole reason they are there is to be looked at right?” Morgan was suddenly at his side, nudging him in the arm. 

“It feels very…voyeuristic.” Spencer swallowed.

“Have you seriously never been to a strip club, Reid?” Matt was now at his other side. 

“Why is that so hard to believe? Do I really strike you as the kind of guy who goes to strip clubs?” They arrived at the table and Morgan motioned for Spencer to take a seat while the others sat around him. 

“It’s usually the quiet ones.” Morgan smirked at him. 

“I cannot believe Savannah is ok with you being here.”

“She was fine with it when I told her it was for your birthday.” Morgan winked at him.

“Do I need to tell you what I told Luke? This is not a brothel, I am not getting laid here.” Spencer sighed in exasperation. 

“It's not too late to take you to a brothel, kid.” Rossi smirked, before excusing himself to the bar. 

“This is the lesser of the two evils, trust me.” Spencer sat back against the plush seat and tried to keep his eyes to himself. It was a difficult feat when just in front of them was another podium with a blonde woman dancing in the skimpiest pair of underwear Spencer had ever seen. 

“No deflowering of boy wonder tonight, please.” Garcia giggled.

“Deflower…you are aware I am not a virgin, right?” Spencer pulled a face, was that how people saw him? 

“I was joking, Spence, calm down.” Garcia rolled her eyes, still tittering to herself. 

“It's that kind of defensive attitude that makes people think you are.” Luke, who was sitting on his left, nudged him. 

“I’m fairly certain if I said the same to you, you would be just as defensive.” Spencer shook his head. 

Just then, Rossi returned carrying a tray of champagne flutes and setting them on the table in the centre. He was closely followed by another young woman carrying an ice bucket in each hand, each with a bottle of the club's most expensive champagne chilling inside. 

Spencer didn’t want to look, really didn’t want to be seen to objectify, but the scent of lavender perfume seemed to flood his senses, his brain, and he could no longer think straight all of a sudden. His eyes which had been attached to the floor glanced over to the pair of deep purple, satin peep toe heels which were standing right in front of him. Slowly his eyes trailed upwards, over a set of long, smooth legs, until meeting a silk pair of dangerously tiny panties, matching the shoes in colour, which he quickly scanned over. His eyes worked up the torso until they came to the chest and the purple silk bra that really left very little to the imagination. Swallowing thickly, his eyes continued their ascent to the face and that’s when time seemed to slow to a halt.

Spencer quivered, actually trembled as he took in your soft features and dazzling eyes. The smile on your lips as you looked at him seemed genuine, and not at all like it was a pain for you to be here. You set down the ice buckets and went about opening one of the bottles, pouring everyone a glass. When you poured Spencer’s glass, bending a little as you did so, his eyes couldn’t help the way they dipped to your cleavage spilling out over the top of your bra.

He quickly snapped his gaze away and thanked you with a shaky smile. He crossed one leg over the other in an attempt to hide an arising problem in his pants.

“I’m Y/N, I’ll be your host for the evening.” You had to speak loudly to be heard by everyone over the pulsing music in the club. “Which one of you is the birthday boy?”

Your eyes flicked between the men in the group, well all of them except the all guy who had paid for the drinks. You’d been informed it was a fortieth birthday, there was no way it was him. 

“This guy right here,” Morgan grinned, gripping Spencer by the shoulders. 

You looked back at the slightly shy, uptight man in his shirt and cardigan, who was holding onto his champagne flute for dear life. He was not your usual clientele, if you didn’t know any better you would think he didn’t want to be here at all. 

“Well, I guess it’s my lucky night.” You couldn’t help but wink at him and even in the low light you saw the way his cheeks instantly flushed pink. 

Usually in your line of work, exotic dancing, not stripping, thank you very much, the men you were paid to dance for were older, usually kind of creepy. Admittedly none of the younger men at the table were bad on the eyes, but this one was especially handsome, even if he was absolutely pertrided. 

“What’s your name, stud?” You placed one hand on your hip and the other you held out for him to shake. 

You saw him swallow, taking a sip of his drink as if to lubricate his mouth so he could speak. 

“S-Spencer.” He took your hand and shook it. It was warm and so much larger than your own, even if it was a little sweaty. 

“Nice to meet you, S-Spencer.” You teased, hoping to ease some tension but it seemed to have the opposite effect. 

He shrunk in on himself, grimacing a little and looking as though he would quite literally rather be anywhere else in the world. 

“You too.” His voice jumped several octaves. 

Most of the rest of the team watched in amusement at Spencer’s discomfort, all of them aside from Emily who had wandered off to watch a redhead dance, tossing dollar bills at her and Luke who although was still seated, clearly had his eyes on the blonde on the podium in front of them. 

“So, shall we get to the good stuff?” You asked him now and he almost choked on his drink. 

“G-good stuff?” His eyes widened in terror.

“Your friends here paid for you to have a private birthday dance. They didn’t tell you?” 

Spencer clenched his jaw and turned to his friends, anger leaching from his eyes.

“I would like to go on record and say I did not invest any money in this particular endeavour.” Hotch was quick to speak up.

“This is just from me and Alvez. Happy birthday, stud.” Morgan winked at him.

If Spencer was a violent man, he would have wrung Morgan’s neck, maybe bashed his and Luke’s heads together until they lost consciousness. He was fairly certain after all his years on the job he could murder them both and get away with it. 

Maybe if you hadn’t been there, standing over him and looking so goddamn delicious in his favourite colour as well, he might have given the two men an ear full. But it wasn’t the time or place and so he swallowed his anger, keeping it bottled up until later and turning back to you. 

“Let’s just…get this over with.” Spencer stood up, grabbing his glass and the full bottle of champagne, god knows he was going to need it, and following you towards one of the curtained off areas. 

You held the curtain back for him to enter first and he did so without letting himself think about what was going to happen when the two of you were alone. The private room was much the same as the main room, only smaller with no bar. There was another plush golden couch in the centre, a smaller raised platform with a pole on the far wall. The wallpaper was a deep, cherry red, swirled with black and a gold chandelier hung from the ceiling offering, once again, very little light. 

Spencer could only assume he was supposed to sit, so slightly reluctantly he dragged his pathetic ass to the couch and sat in the centre of it. He downed the remains of his champagne before swiftly uncorking the bottle. You couldn’t help the way your body reacted to his large, veiny hand expertly pulling the cork from the bottle, like it was the easiest thing in the world. You shuddered a little at the thought of what else his hands might be capable of. 

He discarded the glass on the floor and opted instead to drink straight from the bottle, not something Spencer would ever usually do, but this whole night was so out of the ordinary for him, he decided to just lean into it. You came and stood in front of him, hands on your hips as you looked down on him.

“Not big into sharing?” You smirked at him.

“You…I assumed because you were working…”

You chuckled, reaching out and taking the bottle from his hands and taking a hefty sip. You felt the bubbles tickle the back of your throat and branch out towards your brain.

“I can indulge a little, as long as I don’t get off my face. Besides, the alcohol helps when the customer is particularly…” you searched for the right word. “Old. Ugly. Generally gross.” 

Spencer frowned at you, processing your words. 

“I guess Alvez and Morgan didn’t spring for the package where you pretend to be nice to me.” He tried to not sound as pathetic as he felt but failed miserably.

To his surprise you giggled in response, handing him back the champagne.

“Trust me, stud, you’re one customer I don’t need to drink to have fun with.” You winked at him and heard a little whimper leave his lips. He tried to cover it up by drinking more.

“Fuck,” he mumbled against the bottle top. “Let’s just…I don’t suppose we can just sit here and pretend you gave me a lap dance?” 

“Not a chance.” You smiled, sauntering on your heels over to the stereo setup in the corner. You hit play and music pulsed into the room through the speakers situated in each corner. Spencer woefully recognised the song as 50 Cent’s Candy Shop, he’d heard Morgan listen to it on more than a few occasions over the years.

You strutted back over to him, wiggling your hips to the music as you went. Spencer tried to keep his eyes trained on the bottle as he drank, refusing to let himself look at you. You made it back over to him and once again took the bottle from his hands. You sipped from it delicately, bending over to place it on the floor, ensuring to give Spencer a show of your ass as you did so. 

A low hiss left his lips, probably at the realisation you were wearing a thong. God you were going to enjoy this. 

You stood back up and started swaying to the music, stepping between his open legs. He looked up at you through frightened doe eyes, the most beautiful shade of brown you’d ever seen. His long, messy curls fell in his face and his pouty bottom lip was too kissable for words. You shook that thought off as fast as you could.

You turned you away from him, thinking it easier if you didn’t look at his gorgeous face. You knew his eyes went straight to your bare ass, you could practically feel his gaze on you. 

“You can touch me, Spencer, just nowhere inappropriate please.” Really you wanted those hands to touch you everywhere inappropriate but that kind of behaviour was frowned upon within the walls of the club. 

“I’m…I’m good.” He croaked.

You smiled to yourself as you slowly lowered yourself into his lap, perching at first on his knees before wiggling backwards. 

Spencer gasped loudly as your ass settled into his crotch and without even looking at him you knew he would be one hundred shades of red. 

It certainly wasn’t the first time a man had gotten hard when you’d given them a lap dance and you knew it wouldn’t be the last. It may well be the first time you’d enjoyed it though. 

“Jesus Christ.” He whimpered, your back now flush with his chest, his breath tickling the back of your neck. “I am so, so sorry. This is humiliating.” 

“Don’t be embarrassed.” You grinded against him in time to the music. “I know I am attractive and I am also half naked. Honestly, I’d be a little offended if you weren’t excited by that.” 

“Right. Right.” Spencer nodded, wishing he could reach the champagne bottle. “So uh…how does one get into this line of work? Stripping.” 

He needed to try and take his mind off of how unfathomably good you felt rolling your ass against his dick. 

“I’m not a stripper.” You chided him, pinching his knee with your long acrylic nails as punishment. “I’m an exotic dancer. I don’t take my clothes off. Well, no more so than this.” 

He grumbled at the pain you inflicted on his leg but the pleasure more than outweighed it. 

“Apologies, I hope I wasn’t out of line.” 

“It’s ok, it’s a common misconception. And I started working here to help pay my student loans. I stayed because I love what I do.” You grinded particularly hard against him and he whimpered against your neck. 

“You went to college?” He sounded surprised. 

“Yes, I’m not some bimbo, stud.” You rolled your eyes, another common misconception.

“Sorry.” He clenched his jaw, his cock twitching dangerously in his pants. “What uh, what did you study?” 

“Psychology.”

“No kidding?” He sounded genuinely impressed. “You have a degree in psychology and you work here?” 

You suddenly turned around, kneeling over Spencer, one leg hooked over each of his thighs. His eyes were wide as he stared at you, swallowing thickly. 

“Look, you’re cute but don’t talk to me like I’m some kind of moron and try to make me feel like working here makes me less of a person.” You reached and gripped his jaw, digging your fake nails into his stubbly cheeks.

“I…I didn’t mean it like that, I-“

“I choose to work here.” You cut him off, lowering yourself so you were seated in his lap, straddling him. “I enjoy working here. It gives me a sense of power, I’m choosing to show off my body, to turn men like you into pathetic messes.” 

Spencer moaned, didn’t even try to disguise it. You let go of his face and went to stand up but Spencer surprised you when his hands flew to your hips, gripping you firmly and keeping you in place. 

“I didn’t mean it like that.” He spoke, for the first time sounding close to confident. “You’re stunning and clearly good at your job.” He nodded down to his crotch and how he was straining against his slacks. “I didn’t mean to sound patronising or anything like that. I was merely trying to make conversation and I’m sorry if I upset you. But quite frankly, Y/N, if I don’t keeping talking I’m going to do something really fucking stupid.” 

You narrowed your eyes on him, stilling your movements as the music came to end. He kept his grip on your hips and you found yourself a little dizzy by the firmness in which he held you. 

“Stupid like what?” Your chest heaved with heavy breaths and Spencer’s eyes briefly flicked down and he hissed again at the sight. 

“Something that could probably get you fired, and neither of us wants that.” He grinded up against you this time and a soft moan left your lips. 

“Jesus,” you whined, the tables well and truly turned. “Can you just…I don’t know…give me a clue?” 

Spencer chuckled a little, moving one hand from your hip to the back of your neck and tugging you closer to him. His lips were close to your ear, ghosting over the skin. It was like a switch had been flipped, the shy and awkward guy who hadn’t even wanted a lap dance was gone, replaced by this confident and self-assured man now beneath you. 

His breath fanned across the side of your face and when he spoke, his voice was barely above a whisper. 

“Let’s just say it would involve both of us wearing a lot less clothes and you screaming my name.” 

You whimpered like a dog that had just been kicked and attempted to clamp your legs together but his were in the way. Suddenly he dropped both of his hands to his sides and looked at you darkly. 

“Get up.” He commanded you and you were dumb to do anything by comply. 

“I need to go.” He stood up, snatching up the bottle of champagne. “Thanks for that.” 

You watched him scurry away, seemingly reverting back to the shy creature he’d been initially. He fled back through the curtain, leaving you with an intense heat between your legs. 

Goddamnit, you swallowed, trying to compose yourself. I might have just found my kryptonite. 

***

Two weeks passed and Spencer couldn’t stop thinking about you. Every time he closed his eyes he saw you sitting in his lap, that goddamn purple lingerie glowing against your skin. It never failed to make him painfully hard in a matter of seconds and he’d spent more time than he could count masturbating over thoughts of you the last two weeks.

Eventually he couldn’t keep himself away if he tried. Emily had given them the weekend off and sitting alone in his apartment on Saturday night, his limbs had moved without the forethought to do so. And of course he’d ended up outside Blue Siren. 

He paid the cover charge and saw himself inside, ambling over to the bar and ordering himself a scotch. He watched the room, in a way he was trained to do, watching and waiting for a glimpse of you. 

He’d gotten down three drinks before finally he saw you across the room. His cock twitched almost instantly. Today you wore a crimson red lace teddy with shoes to match. He preferred the purple, liked it when you had more skin on display, but you still looked like a fallen fucking angel. An incredibly sexy fallen angel. 

He finished the remains of his drink and set the glass down on the bar before heading your way. 

As soon as you saw him, you couldn’t help the way your whole face lit up. He looked much the same as he had last time in his smart shirt and slacks but today he’d bypassed the cardigan and had his shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows. 

“Stud, you came back.” You smirked at him, placing one hand on your hip. 

“Can we talk?” 

“I’m on the clock.” You shrugged. “My time has to be paid for.”

Spencer rolled his eyes and fished his wallet out of his pocket, flashing a large wad of bills. He pulled one out and stuffed it in your hand.

“How much will a hundred get me?” 

You looked down at the bill wide eyed, seeing it was actually a hundred dollars. You looked back at him with a smile.

“At least a few dances.” You turned on your heels and motioned for him to follow you towards the private room you’d occupied a few weeks ago. 

Once inside you watched him get comfortable on the couch.

“You sure you just want to talk? I can dance and talk at the same time, I’m just that good.” You winked at him.

“N-no.” He shook his head. “No dancing, please?”

“Fine.” You chuckled, coming over and sitting next to him on the couch. “What’s up? Must be important if you’re willing to drop a C-Note on me.” 

“I uh, I wanted to apologise for my conduct the other week. It was very unlike me and I wanted you to know I’m sorry.” His cheeks flushed.

“Hmm.” You mused. “See, I don’t think it was unlike you. I think you allowed yourself to be completely authentic in that moment, letting out a side of yourself you don’t normally let people see.” 

“That psych degree is paying off, I see.” His lip twitched into a small smirk.

“I’m right, aren’t I?” 

“People see me a certain way.” He sighed a little as he spoke. “I’m the smart one, the bookish, awkward one. I’ve been seen that way for as long as I can remember. I guess I grew out of it but no one around me sees that. So maybe I play up the persona a little because it's what’s expected of me.” He confessed, not sure why he was doing so but you oddly put him at ease.

“Yeah, I get that. Sometimes it's easier to play into the expected, to fall into the roles people assign us rather than forge our own identity. You know, I only got my degree to prove I could. I wanted to prove, even if only to myself, that there was more to me than people expected of me. One day I might do something with it but for now, I really do love my job. But now I know I could do something else if I chose to.” You were equally surprised by your honesty. 

“My friends brought me here because they think I’m some kind of pathetic sad sack that can’t get laid.” He chuckled wistfully. 

“Oh but I bet you have no problem in that department, from what I could tell.” Maybe you leant closer to him, you certainly didn’t mean to, but you were sure he was closer now.

“I do alright.” The glint in his eyes told you he did better than alright and why did that cause a rumble of jealousy in your chest? 

This time it was him that leaned closer to you, his large hand finding your thigh. You felt your chest tighten at the way it felt.

“I’m not going to sleep with you.” You spoke but you didn’t particularly believe your own voice. 

“Not here, certainly not.” He inched his hand higher and you didn’t stop him.

“Not here, not anywhere.” 

“Tell yourself that all you want, princess.” He growled the last word, eliciting a whimper from your lips. 

“I don’t sleep with customers. Full stop.” 

“You sleep with me, I promise I will never come back here.” He dared edge his hand higher, now right at the top of your thigh.

“You should leave.” You said, but you didn’t move or push him away. 

“I just paid you a hundred dollars, I’m not going anywhere.” He squeezed your thigh, his fingers digging into your flesh. 

“Maybe I did prefer it when you were shy.”

“No you didn’t.” He smiled in a knowing way. And he was right. “Let me take you out, show you what I’m really like.” 

You swallowed, god how you would love that. But no. You couldn’t succumb. 

“Not gonna happen.” You took hold of his hand and forcibly removed it from your thigh. You removed the bill he’d given you from where you’d tucked it in the side of your panties and tossed it at him. “Keep your money. Leave before I call security.” 

Spencer chuckled to himself, shaking his head and placing the note on the couch, leaving it there as he stood up. 

“I’m not a threat, you don’t need to call security.” He held his hands up in defeat. “I think you know as well as I do that there's something between us, I just don’t know why you won’t admit to it. But whatever, I’ll go.” 

He went to move past you but as he did, his fingers circled your wrist. He turned your hand over and forcibly put his business card in your open hand. 

“In case you change your mind, princess.” With that he was gone, leaving your legs shaking in his wake. 

You looked down at the card in your hand and frowned to yourself as you read the words adorned on it. 

Doctor Spencer Reid. FBI. 

Huh. That was an interesting turn of events. 

***

Spencer didn’t return to the club again, respecting your boundaries and just holding onto a small glimmer of hope that you would call. But weeks passed and you never did. 

In all honesty, he wasn’t that surprised. He expected you’d tossed the card the minute he’d walked through that curtain and never given him a second thought. 

He didn’t often allow himself to get close to people for this very reason. When Spencer fell for someone it happened fast and hard and now you were the only thing he could think of and it was tearing him in two. 

It was Morgan and Luke’s fault. Them and their dumb idea to take him to a strip club for his birthday. He decided his next birthday was cancelled, the one after that too. Screw it, all his birthdays were cancelled indefinitely. 

Thankfully due to the BAU’s heavy caseload and him teaching classes at Marlborough University, he didn’t have a whole lot of time to dwell on you, which was for the best. 

He’d just have to resign himself to being alone again. Just like always. 

***

For weeks that card felt like it was burning a hole in your pocket. You didn’t intend on calling Spencer, but you just couldn’t get rid of it. There was something different about him, something that begged you to get to know him. But you had to resist temptation, it would only end badly like it always did. 

Still, you couldn’t help but picture his face when you gave an old, sad man a lap dance, wishing it were him instead. It never failed to send chills down your spine when you thought of the way his persona had flipped from shy and slightly nerdy, to suddenly so self assured. 

But you had to stop thinking about him. Thinking about him was fruitless. But of course you couldn’t, because like it or not, you were going to see him again. 

You’d almost considered pulling out of the class, as soon as you’d seen his name on the business card you knew it would be a bad idea to go through with it. But you’d been excited about this for months and you really didn’t want to wait another semester to take it. You just had to hope you could get through it without incident, however unlikely that seemed. 

“Ok, let's take a moment now to discuss the difference between a trigger and a stressor. A trigger is a sensory event experienced by an offender that precipitates subsequent behaviour whereas a stressor is a longer term pattern of behaviour or circumstances which push a person into behaving differently than they normally would. You might want to write this down. I probably shouldn’t be telling you guys this but I’m definitely putting this on the final.”

You watched the brunette a few rows in front of you coyly tell Professor Reid she was simply auditing the class. You couldn’t help but smirk when an array of other beautiful girls raised their hands when he asked who else was auditing. He was the youngest, best looking professor on campus, it was no surprise his class had drawn in a crowd of young girls to fawn over him. 

“Uh…ok.” He shook his head, checking his watch. “Unfortunately that is all the time we have for today. Thank you guys.”

You stayed seated while the rest of the class filtered out, watching him collect a stack of papers and put them in his worn satchel before turning to erase the writing on the whiteboard. You stuffed your laptop away and crept down the stairs towards the front of the class, fingers toying with the small white piece of card.

“What was your stressor, Professor? Or should I say, Doctor?” 

You saw his back go rigid and for a moment or two he didn't move a muscle. He set the whiteboard eraser down and slowly turned around as you waved his business card at him. He couldn’t help the way his eyes raked up and down your body, clad in jeans and a t-shirt, more than he was used to seeing on you. He still thought you looked like a goddamn angel.

“Uh, I’m sorry, what?” He frowned, clearly at a loss for words. 

“You said a stressor is a longer term pattern of behaviour or circumstances which push a person into behaving differently than they normally would. When I first met you, you behaved differently than you normally would, am I right? Pretending to be this shy, awkward little thing.” You quipped your eyebrow at him.

“For the record I wasn’t pretending. It wasn’t some kind of ruse or something. I am generally shy and awkward. But I have learnt to assert myself when I need to, for instance, when I see something I want. I got carried away that night at the club and I’m sorry for that, that was out of character for me.” He leant back against the edge of the desk and perched on it. “Why are you in my class, Y/N?”

“I signed up for this class before I met you. I didn’t even know you were the professor until you gave me your card.” You shrugged a little nervously. 

You were more uncomfortable in normal social settings. At the Blue Siren, where you commanded the room, the confidence oozed for you. But in the real world you were much uncomfortable in your own skin. 

“You want to be a profiler?” He scrutinised you with his gaze.

“Maybe someday. I told you, I don’t necessarily want to work at the club forever, I want options.”

“But you love your job.” He repeated what you’d told him.

“I do.” You nodded. “If this is going to be weird I can drop out. I can go to Georgetown next semester, although their professor is not a legit FBI agent with the BAU.” You chuckled a little.

“Why would it be weird?” 

“Because,” you shrugged. “Since the second you turned around and saw me standing here, you’ve been undressing me with your eyes.” 

Spencer smiled, a hint of a blush gracing his cheeks.

“I have, it's true.” He agreed. “I can’t help it if I’ve already seen so much of it.” 

“I don’t think you should want to sleep with your students.” 

“There’s no rule against it.” He chuckled, pushing himself back to his feet. “My students are all over the legal age, if I was to sleep with one of them, it would be completely consensual and no rules would be broken.”

“You’re talking from experience.” You stated and his eyes playfully glistened.

“Maybe.” He shrugged but his face said it all. “I told you, I do alright.” 

“Well, I can tell you for a fact I won’t be one of them.” 

“And that’s your loss.” He turned his back on you now and started gathering up his things, slinging his satchel over his head. “Excuse me, I have papers to grade.” 

You watched him saunter away, leaving you standing there in confusion and a little turned on if you were honest. He shoved open the door and exited the classroom and before you could think it through you were following hot on his heels. You caught up to him in the corridor as he was unlocking his office door. He spotted you in his peripheral vision.

“My office hours are on Wednesday.” He pushed open the door. “If you need something you can come…”

He trailed off when you pushed past him, entering his office ahead of him. He frowned and followed you inside, closing and locking the door behind him. 

“What?” He sighed, taking off his bag and dropping it in the chair next to the door. “You asked me to leave the club that night and I did. I gave you my number, I left the ball in your court and you didn’t call and that’s fine. I walked away! So why are you pursuing me?” 

“I won’t give it up.” You blurted out, causing a heavy frown to form on Spencer’s face.

“Give up what?” Had he missed a part of the conversation?

“The club, I love my job.”

“I know you do.” His frown deepened. “Why would you have to give it up?”

“Do you know how many men I meet that think I’m some kind of damsel in distress that needs saving? They swoop in, on their fucking white horse and think they can rescue the poor, broken stripper.”

“Exotic dancer.” Spencer corrected you with a smirk. You huffed somewhat childishly. 

“Whatever. They think they can change me. Men always think I’m some kind of fucking damsel in distress that needs saving from the big bad world of strip…exotic dancing. That’s why I don’t date customers, not because it's not allowed. I’ve made the mistake before and it always ends the same. So stop looking at me like you want to fuck me, because its never going to happen!” 

Spencer simply looked at you curiously while you ranted, voice getting louder with each syllable. Confusingly he was smiling when you finished.

“Can I speak now?” He had a hint of amusement in his eyes.

“If you have to.” You rolled your eyes. 

Spencer took a few steps away from the door and you felt yourself growing weaker the closer he got to you. He was magnetic, you couldn’t help but gravitate towards him.

“Correct me if I’m wrong but I’m certain I never once said that I have any kind of issue with your profession and I certainly never asked you to quit. Am I right?” 

“Y-yes.” You swallowed, catching the scent of his cologne. 

“If you’ve found something you love I would never dream of keeping you from that. Honestly, I admire you. It takes a lot of bravery and a lot of confidence to do what you do and god…you do it so well. Why would I ever want to take that from you?” He was so close now and you were begging him to touch you even though it was a bad idea.

“I…I don’t know.” 

“Yes, princess, you do.” He smirked. “You made an assumption about me, the same way I admittedly did when I first met you. But I was wrong and I acknowledged that. It’s only fair for you to do the same.” 

He raised his hand and your legs shook before he even touched you, at the sheer anticipation of it. It came up to cup your jaw, firmly enough that you could feel his fingers squeezing your jawbone. 

“Y-you don’t want to change me?” You whimpered.

“Why mess with perfection?” He bowed his head, his lips so close to yours you could feel the heat radiating off of them. “I’m no knight in shining armour, Y/N, I’m not rushing in to try and save you. And you are most certainly not a damsel in distress. You are a strong, independent woman and I would be lucky to merely exist in your orbit.” 

You mewled, trying to move closer to him, to crash your lips against his but he held you firmly in place, chuckling at your eagerness. For the first time in a long time you felt all your bravado melt away, all the confidence you had on stage at the Blue Siren was washed away, leaving you a trembling mess in front of this man. And normally that kind of vulnerability would cause you to run for the hills. But being vulnerable with Spencer didn’t seem all that bad.

“Can you,” you swallowed, eyes glued on those pouty lips of his. “Please…just kiss me already, stud.” 

Spencer laughed and for a moment you thought he might not comply. But then he closed the small space between you and you finally got to feel those pillowy lips pressing against yours. He gripped the back of your neck firmly, keeping you in place, as if you would go anywhere. 

Maybe one day Spencer would thank Morgan and Luke for the birthday present, this was one he’d surely cherish, as long as you would let him. 

Oh, isn't this exactly where you'd like me?

I'm exactly where you'd like me, you know.

Praying for love and a lap dance,

Taglist -

All

@muffin-cup @andiebeaword @measure-in-pain @takeyourleap-of-faith @dirtytissuebox @ssa-uglywhore27 @smurphyse @reidselle @reidsbookclub

SR x reader

@dreatine @dr-spencerr-reidd @spenxerslut @drayshadow @rainsong01 @this-is-doctor-and-its-calm @matthew-gray-gubler-lover @spencer-reid-wonderland @im-totally-not-dezi @hotchandspencearedilfs

[deeply-unserious-fellow]

Follow up to my silly little Vees in Heaven AU that I might as well keep developing because people seem to like it lmao. This is my basic idea of how each of them individually would react to ending up in Heaven :)

Vox: Would probably behave like a normal person the longest because A; being in Heaven for an extended period of time could offer some Business Opportunites and B; he cares about his image so fucking much, and given that he was probably pretty well known while he was alive I don't think he'd want the people of Heaven knowing about all the evil business man shit like, at all. Though the monotony of Heaven would ABSOLUTELY drive him up the fucking walls. Nothing ever happens there. He can barely even network because Heaven doesn't have anything even RESEMBLING the overlord system down in Hell, there's no rank mobility for mortal souls. And that's assuming Sera even lets him DO anything because sinners ascending at all is a pretty fuckin new concept and she would at the very LEAST want to keep the news from spreading until she figures out what the fuck is going on. Either way it's not like he can do much because oh god what would PURPOSEFULLY going back to Hell do to his reputation!?!? He's stuck between a rock and a hard place and hating every second of it, but hey at least he can try to. Get some Heaven shit for Voxtech. And his head probably(?) isn't a TV anymore-

Velvette: Lasts for a couple months(or however long it takes her to get whatever information/materials she deems useful) before she starts causing problems on purpose. Think Respectless x100. It's even worse cause Sera has absolutely no experience dealing with this kinda shit. It's also terrible for Vel because nothing she's doing is getting her sent back down! As much as Sera wants to, she has to keep the "sinners ascending" thing contained until she figures out wtf is going on, which means no going back to Hell until Sera can discuss things with HER higher ups, which based off of how little Sera seems to know abt how Heaven works just. In general. Is probably nigh impossible. So Velvette's just stuck in Heaven, constantly attempting whatever she could possibly do to go back to Hell. Probably starts off small like just pissing Sera off on purpose every way she can, insulting people, etc because she also doesn't wanna do anything bad enough to get herself like. Executed or some shit. But as time presses on and shit just keeps Not Working she keeps upping the anti until she's wracked up several counts of arson and is being held in the closest thing Heaven has to a prison. Which she'll probably find ways to cause problems from there too Idk.

Valentino: He's in Heaven for like 5 seconds and then immediately just

Its like having Adam back only he's Worse and Does Not Want To Be Here.

Now I would like to note, all of this is very dependant on whatever plot points might be happening around them? Cause like I said in the original post there's def a lot of Heaven/Hell drama going on in the background that would definitely effect the plot of the AU, but I don't really know. What that is yet. Because it means doing more world building hcs then I am mentally equipped to make rn. So for now these are just what I think their ✨general reactions✨ would be + a stupid doodle of Val I did last night.

Also I need a name for this AU. My only real idea is Heavenly Vees? But that feels kinda basic idk. Maybe HeavenVee? Idk-

[tw33k-tucker]

Doodle requests are open‼️

The series characters I can draw the best(In order) are:

South Park, Eddsworld, Creepypasta, n' SMG4

Just a some things about me(changes/updates so much)

Fictionkin of:

Tweek Tweak

Craig Tucker

Kyle Broflovski

Kenny McCormick

Stan Marsh (South Park)

Mickey (Bobs Burgers)

Carl Grimes

Daryl Dixon (TWD) (I'm 99% sure I am a Fictionkin of him👍)

Gregory House (House M.D.)

Lucifer

Vox

Husk

Angel Dust (Hazbin hotel)

Sniper

Medic {Pls, istg I'm not insane anymore, I swear😭} (TF2)

Tord (Eddsworld)

Shadow ( Sonic, but not sure which specific Sonic yet)

Questioning 2

+ I have also found out I am a fictionflicker, so if there's some kins I have that aren't on the list above that's why👍 I do have a few recurring fictionflickers though, Such as:

Hunter (TOH)

Michael Afton (FNAF)

Crying Child/BV/Evan Afton (FNAF 4)

Tom (Eddsworld)

Adam (Hazbin Hotel)

SMG3 + Mr Puzzles (SMG4)

Ticci Toby

BEN Drowned + Jeff The Killer (Creepypasta)

Scout/Jeremy(TF2)

Louise (Bobs Burgers)

Therian but not completely comfortable to reveal some of my Theriotypes, but the ones I'm fine with revealing are a Border Collie, Island Fox, Clouded leopard, Red Panda, Some kind of Shark, Bi Color german shepherd, and an Opossum.

Current Shifts/Kinfeels:

Tweek Tweak

Craig Tucker

Scout/Jeremy

Ticci Toby

He/Him (Trans FTM/Masc)

Minor !! (I'm changing it to minor cause I only want the people close to me/my mutuals to know my age, sorry if its weird or smthn!!!)

Christan (but excepts any religion)

Favorite Animal is Guinea pigs

2nd favorite drink is coffee (My #1 favorite drink is water cause I need it to survive)

Top 5 Favorite songs:

1st: Runs in the family - Amanda Palmer

2nd: Life - Mother Mother

3rd: Animals - STOMACH BOOK

4th: Bad Habit - Steve Lacy

5th: Cupid's Chokehold / Breakfast In America - Gym Class Heros

(it was top 10 before, but I'm to lazy for that crap)

A few last random shit facts 'bout me + some random things

I am very scared of alarms(Like, fire alarms)

I have Trypophobia aka fear of holes(it's very bad)

I have a love hate relationship with insects

I'm AroAce but I still want a romantic relationship and Bi

Wolverine is my all-time favorite hero(I don't care that he's technically an anti-hero/also an X-Men, he's the best)

Black and Red are my favorite colors

HTTYD is my favorite movie series

I love Scooby Doo(Especially Mystery Incorporated)

I am a mix of Introverted and Extroverted

I swear I wanna cry when stuff I've been waiting for is altered(Don't ask, I have no idea why)

I have anxiety

I freak out VERY easily

Salamanders are so cool istg

I have sensitive ears so I hate loud noises(I think I'm just a wimp)

I was in a car crash when I was 8(Luckily me and my dad were fine)

I like Diary of a wimpy kid

I have an older brother that I fight with(Imagine Rodrick and Greg's rivalry)

Some noises also make me want to bawl my eyes out(Also don't ask why, I seriously don't know)

I will 'kill' you if you look in my sketchbook(I swear you do not wanna see it, like really, you do NOT)

I have social anxiety👍

I'm seriously fucked up in the brain

I have asthma

I have OCD and BPD

And also i've decided to make tags because it is so annoying trying to find certain posts. So: the art tag is #Tw33k Draws the ask tag is #Tw33ks asks and I also use #Tw33k Rambles when I'm just talking and then as well theres just the #Shitpost tag on the posts I post that have words or images that isn't art, I also #Tw33k Rants, I think that name is pretty self explanatory, I also don't add tags to like any of the stuff I reblog unless I'm talking in the tags

I'm horrible at spelling

And yeah, that's all I'm willing to tell

Also please don't hate me, I can't control who I am

Thanks for reading

Random Icons :D

Okay! One last thing, sense I have started the Zombie Park series, you can ask them questions about litterly ANYTHING some stuff they might not be allowed to answer at the moment like some stuff that'll happen in the future, but if you have any questions about the AU feel free to ask

[chaifootsteps]

Have you heard of the Blackgyph0n scandal? People are blaming "Viv Antis" spreading the rumors/allegations to make Spindlehorse look bad. But here's the thing, I am critical of Viv, but I genuinely really like Blackgyph0n's music and think the stuff he made for Hazbin are catchier than the show's canon songs. Also, I agree that Viv and other Spindlehorse staff probably didn't know about the Gabe thing before he was hired on the pilot. These people (including Billie Bust-Up) all have their own lives and probably dont know everything about their coworkers so I think they're blameless.I am not sure what to think of the situation right now as it's mostly word-of-mouth and there's no solid/without a doubt/ concrete evidence. But I'll be really upset if it's proven without a doubt that he's a creep.

I've literally never been able to get a straight answer out of anyone when it comes to the Blackgyph0n thing. His relationship with Claire Corlett is super fucking creepy, but no consensus seems to exist for much time they spent together when she was a kid, when they actually started dating, whether Michelle Creber cut ties with both of them or whether she sent them a happy anniversary message at some point.

Whatever the case, it's a tough spot to be in because Claire's adamant that he didn't groom her and that strangers insisting she was hurts her.

[coleskingdom]

Anti-Hero

Adam Cole x F Reader

Minors DNI 18+ NSFW

@madhatterbri @midwestmade29

GIF by @midwestmade29

“ Adam, I appreciate your concern, but there’s no need to be. I’m happy, all you said you ever wanted was for me to be happy, and I am.” The number of times that he and I had been over my relationship with Cole. “ I’m done talking about this with you. You can either get on board and be my friend and be happy for me or we can just not talk about it.”

“What is your blind spot with him? He’s not a good guy, he’s going to hurt you. You don’t know all of the sides of him.” His voice tinged with frustration.

“ I said I’m done with this conversation Adam. “ opening the door for him to see himself out of the hotel room. I saw Cole walking down to the hall, headed towards us, his face lighting up and then falling when he saw mine. “ Babe, is everything okay?”as he took his place beside me. “Yeah Page is just leaving.” as if turned to go back into our room. Page shook his head as he walked away.

“Y’all okay? “ Cole asked as we walked back inside. “No, he thinks I’m making bad choices, and you’re his focal point right now.”I sat down next to him and leaned into him. “He’s always thought of himself as a hero, the cowboy in the white hat.” I sighed as he pulled me into him. “ I’ll handle it. Instead of coming to the arena, stay here relax take a bath, I won’t be long. I promise.” he kissed me before getting up and heading out.

The bathroom had a tv by the bathtub, I ordered some wine and took Adam’s advice to relax. I almost dozed off then I remembered the end of Dynamite. There were these masked goons putting Page through a car windshield, the sad pathetic little moans that fell from his mouth as the devil appeared again.

I got out of the tub , put on a robe , who else had the goons attacked first Jay now Page, there was a Bullet Club link but not much else. My hand reached to call Adam to see if he was okay if he had been attacked. The phone vibrated in my hand it was Adam “ Hey I’m on my way back. Do you need anything?” his voice chipper “ No I was going to call and check on you I saw the end of Dynamite. Are you okay? “ as I paced texting the bucks and page for a status update. “ I see” his voice changing slightly, “ I’m fine, seems Page interfered with business that wasn’t his. I’ll see you soon. “ and hung up.

The texts back said Page was roughed up but nothing serious. I heard the door open, and Adam had changed from what he had left in, he was in all black and shards of glass glittered the tops of his shoes.

“What did you do? You said you were going to talk to him.” Fury rising in my voice. “No, I said I’d handle it.” Seemingly unbothered by my question as he walked closer to me.

“ The difference between a hero and a villain is, a hero will sacrifice you for the greater good, and a villain will burn everything down to protect who and what they love.” his voice sending a chill down my spine, but his words also thrilled me.

Adam’s fingers lifted my chin bringing my eyes to his , his knuckles grazing my cheek “ My dear I’m no hero.” His hand curves around my neck. In a kiss that is possessive. He parts my lips with his tongue and slides deep.

"How do you do that?" I whisper.

"You say things like that... Things that should terrify me. But instead, they just..."

“ Just what?”He whispered as his hands went to the belt of the robe, untying it as he moves us towards the bed. My legs reach the edge as he trails his lips down my neck , opening the robe as he kisses down to my breasts taking a nipple in his mouth his teeth grazing it, his name falling from my lips. his mouth moving to the other breast sucking and biting. “They make me really really want you“ Pain and pleasure run through my body as his teeth marked me . My hands running through his hair pulling him closer to me . “I know what you want pretty girl, and you know that I’m the only one that can give it to you.” A low growl rumbles through his chest. My body vibrating with need,”I know” I whisper just before he devours me.

His fingers driving deep inside of me he circles my clit with his mouth, lapping the swollen bud until I explode. I arch off the bed and fist the comforter his name lost in my moans. My body twists as he brings me down, groaning along with me.

“ There’s nothing that I won’t do for you, there’s nothing that I won’t become for you.” his kisses trail up my body before pulling away and quickly undressing. He hovers over me “Show me.” I whisper.

His eyes flare just before he lowers his hips and parts me with a slow, persistent push.I scrape my nails down his back and take him. He fills me and fills me until I'm positive I can't take anymore.Then he slips deeper.

"I fucking dream about being right here, buried inside of you." I kiss his shoulder as he thrusts into me, drawing out slowly and driving home again and again.I spread my legs wider. I wrap them around his back, whimpering each thrust. I want to be his princess, his pretty girl, his world.

"Those sounds you make." His teeth scrape over where my pulse pounds in my throat. "I love knowing they're for me. Because of what I do to you." I wrap myself around him and hold. I don't want this moment to end.He pounds me deeper into the mattress, his cock and his words coaxing feelings out of me I don't know what to do with. I seal my mouth against his shoulder and cry out against the heat of his skin.

“ Come for me pretty girl” His words cut off as blinding heat tears through me. I'm writhing and arching off the bed, clawing at his back to bring him closer, to take more. He kisses my throat and empties himself inside of me.

When he rolls me onto my side and curls behind me, I finally ask “Who else?” softly not wanting to break the spell but needing fully to share this secret.“ Max, and collateral damage.” Nibbling my ear “They’ll come for you.” my voice cracking “ I know and I’m counting on it.” His arms pulling me into him.

[sageistri]

https://www.tumblr.com/sageistri/755503901504045056/the-funniest-thing-about-these-people-saying?source=share

what else did the jk stan say? i'm not mad about it, i'm just curious to know what else they said because even i have noticed that pjms are too hard on jimin, the way they talk about him sometimes, you wont be able to tell the difference between them and his antis. i think i am the same too sometimes. i can't help it, i hold him to impossible standards and i always have to talk some sense into myself.

it's interesting when another stan notices something like this. i do think that there exist jjks who can be mature and logical

They didn't say anything more, they were arguing with a pjm and made that statement and it was interesting because they were being adamant about it and i disagreed at the time and actually wanted to make a post about it but I forgot. But now in light of everything, I can't help thinking they have a point. Their statement wasn't actually the basis of my post, it was just something I remembered when I was typing.

No other stan complains about their fave and his decisions as much as pjms do. And that is the edge they have over pjms. You will never see a jk Stan making any complaints about him and they seem to embrace those parts of him that we see as horrible. E.g the whole bullying thing.

I mean It's a good thing, constructive criticism and all but honestly sometimes it's exhausting to even try and criticise jimin in anyway as a fan because the moment you say something like "oh i don't really like this, it's not for me" here people go talking about

"yeah me too, i hate that he does this, i'm so tired of everything. It's so hard to stan him. This is so boring and tacky. It's horrible. This era is going to be a flop. This is such a downgrade from this concept or song he released years ago. I wish he would do this instead"

so I understand why some pjms would prefer everyone swallowed their complaints but like I said before, that shouldn't be encouraged. It would be better if everyone would learn to give their opinions without going off the rails but they can't.

It's always one or the other. It's either they don't want you to say anything bad at all and would prefer it if you swallowed everything without a single complaint regardless of your feelings or you have those who already started to resent him over certain things and are just waiting for you to give them an opportunity to shit on him.

And yes you stan someone because you like them (duh!) but not really "like" them because you don't respect them. Over the years they stopped being someone you got into because you connected with them and have now turned into a client of some sort and your only goal is to see them succeed commercially. If they don't, you resent them because you think all your effort was for naught or you could come to see them as an unwanted child that you've been saddled with, you don't actually love them anymore but you think you have to support them because it's your responsibility and you are still attached and you lash out when they don't give you the results you want or act the way you'd prefer. You like them we know, but you wouldn't if you could help it because according to some of you " the bad is starting to outweigh the good".

You can love and support someone but deep down still see it as a chore because of a lot of reasons but you can't stop because you can't help yourself.

[sunfyredarchive]

i really wasn't gonna do this but i just started typing and couldn't stop myself. pretty sure so many things left unsaid but needed it to get it off my chest somehow.

let me start with saying that as a sunfyre && aegon enjoyer, the actual reason of my discomfort is NOT the way they ended up. i am sad about it ofc, but i knew that was one of the few canon outcomes they wouldn’t alter much ( && must have reaaaallly enjoyed depicting for reasons 🤡 ) so what left me so shaken was not the sight of sunfyre— a creature i’ve been stanning and really wanting to see for literally a decade— and aegon’s canon fate but the way it was delivered, obviously. as i’ve been discussing with some of my close mutuals and friends on here, personally i’m no longer enjoying the endless and, at this point, quite out of control woobification of aegon in particular. please don’t get me wrong, i wasn’t expecting him to be depicted in a controversially positive / heroic light all of a sudden especially with their unquestionably pro-rhaenyra ( not pro-black in general ) and anti-aegon ( not anti-green in general ) agenda, which did not bother me this much until this season. at first it seemed creative and tragically engrossing, to depict aegon so unwilling and pitiful and so not ready to rule. it added him way more nuance and promised a compelling character development. something that honestly made me find him way more interesting because i seldom care for stereotypical && morally flawless / less flawed leaders in fiction. but i was expecting / hoping for jaehaerys to be a bit of a turning point for aegon’s character, and i know i’m not alone in that so i also can’t be the only one who’s so sick and tired of aegon still being a clumsy comic relief with how cartoonishly pathetic they’re so adamant on depicting him until the very end ?? stuff like his own council leaving him on read and now his terrible high valyrian ( i don’t wanna start yapping about this either but lemme say i like the idea of aegon being not as fluent and eloquent as aemond, it fits his overall personality. can be interpreted as him being lazy / easily bored / having adhd / rebelling his targaryen upbringing like cutting his hair short also indicated etc etc I LIKE THAT !! makes sense. but they didn’t need to go so overboard with it like they did with every other logically negative aspect of him. the high valyrian scene would be so much better with aegon simply getting irritated and backing down from the conversation due to his current lack of military prowess rather than him downright being unable to form a single coherent sentence lol ), like .. please. so are we really going to take only the most outrageous, downgrading theories from an already unreliable narration because anything that is mildly admirable about him must be green propaganda ?? he just has to be so laughably bad at everything and anything because he’s “evil” ?? i didn’t know this was supposed to be a morality play.

now back to rook’s rest. i understand there aren’t enough details about the dragon conflict here so of course the anti-aegonism pioneers felt justified to run with the idea that’d paint him in the worst light by ridiculing him as blatantly as possible ( aka taking away one of his few redeemable qualities, which is trying to be an active player by commanding his own armies instead of remaining out of harm’s way by choice ) and make his most prominent attempt at leading look like a scorned child’s petty, impulsive, barely-conscious decision which only proved everyone who believed him to be a failure; right. whereas all the other prominent characters on team black are made to look utterly brave && heroic for merely suggesting to do the same... cute. now they can because they ain’t aegon uwu. you know, someone who actually did fight until he was left almost unrecognizable. now look me in the eye and tell me that isn’t a too under the nose way to manipulate “canon” info to serve a biased agenda.

what’s more disappointing for me personally is how sunfyre could not escape the anti-aegonism’s wrath either, who’s always been more special to me than aegon himself. here we see aegon and aemond as joined forces, against the common foe, appearing at the very same time so nothing justifies aegon showing up unannounced and almost ruining a whole ass plan nobody bothered to fill him in on— another illogically biased addition to further ridicule aegon. mind you, since there isn’t enough to decipher aemond’s true intentions during this battle, i really wouldn’t mind him ending up causing more damage to aegon/sunfyre than even rhaenys/meleys, but the choice to make him so blatantly attack his brother/king and one of the very few fighting dragons they had when they chose to make this very same guy be a lot more distraught over killing lucerys is just .. cartoonish. imagine society if we were allowed to watch two brothers managing to set aside their personal grudges despite all the clumsy attempts at paving the way for a bigger enmity ( the brothel scene can’t sit with us ). i also wouldn’t mind seeing aemond visibly being tempted to hurt aegon for a split second during the intense eye contact only to attack in a more ambiguous way rather than downright aiming at aegon, it’d be closer to his actions in book too but the disney villanism won because, again, they simply cannot be allowed to appear like a semi-caring family. something i will also omit in my own portrayal because i’ve always believed the eye incident being a turning point for aemond/aegon’s relationship.

gonna end my angry rambling by going back to woobified sunfyre. notice how it is worded as “against vhagar alone she might have had some chance, but against vhagar and sunfyre…” not the other way around. not pointing out the more obvious fact that meleys would be able to take down sunfyre if it wasn’t for vhagar. which means we can safely accept the fact sunfyre was an important and necessary player for this whole “trap”. him and aegon didn’t just randomly show up on a whim to rain on aemond’s parade out of jealousy. they were always meant to be a part of this because apparently not even vhagar could defeat meleys alone and remain unscathed, she needed a distraction. and before anyone claims the attached part might also be pro-green propaganda ( just like the whole sunfyre’s beauty && loyalty were exaggerated allegations because apparently anything that’s mildly praise-worthy is immediately shot down as a propaganda but !! only if it’s about a green 😉 ) — i strongly disagree, mostly because of that iconic line about princess rhaenys’ courage. because guess what ?? you actually can praise AND accuse both parties in a well-balanced manner instead of butchering a perfectly tragic && intentionally ambiguous story by bending the “facts” to your will. shocking to some i presume.

[grantaireble]

Tortured Poets & "The Bride of Frankenstein"

To a new world of gods and monsters!

Alright this is soo long now and I came about this revelation the weirdest way (while watching world class color guard) but I haven't been able to stop thinking about it since. All of my ttpd thoughts were rattling around in my brain as we were watching videos and one group put out a Bride of Frankenstein show last year and they used this quote as a V.O:

“What do you expect? Such an audience needs something more than a pretty little love story. So why shouldn’t I write of monsters?"

And, man, something about that got the neurons firing, especially because I had already been thinking a lot about the connections between Mary Shelley's Frankenstein and TTPD. Here are some of those:

Frankenstein visuals in the Fortnight MV

“The 1830s” Mary Shelley's Frankenstein was originally published in 1818, but she made some edits for an 1831 edition

Mary Shelley, Percy Shelley, and Lord Byron were sort of their own little TPD, writing horror stories together one rainy summer.

TTPD and Frankenstein seem to reference many of the same things

Both Taylor on TTPD and Mary Shelley in Frankenstein reference the Rime of the Ancient Mariner and the albatross

“I am going to unexplored regions, to “the land of mist and snow;” but I shall kill no albatross, therefore do not be alarmed for my safety, or if I should come back to you as worn and woeful as the “Ancient Mariner?” – Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

Both Taylor and Mary Shelly reference Greek Myth 

Frankenstein: “The Modern Prometheus” (often compared to the Christian story of Christ)

Cassandra: gifted the power of prophecy but cursed to never be believed

Does the headpiece above not give Medusa?

Both Taylor and Mary Shelley reference the Bible

“I ought to be thy Adam, but I am rather the fallen angel...” (Frankenstein) / “I got cursed like Eve got bitten,” etc. 

Both Taylor and Mary Shelley reference principles of Alchemy! 

"The modern masters promise very little; they know that metals cannot be transmuted, and that the elixir of life is a chimera." (Chimera = lion's head, goat's body, and a serpent's tail, more Greek mythology)

Some lyrics from TTPD also feel like direct references to Frankenstein quotes or themes

“I was benevolent and good; misery made me a fiend.” ― Mary Shelley, Frankenstein / “I was tamed, I was gentle ‘til the circus life made me mean.” – Taylor Swift, Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me?

“I am alone and miserable. Only someone as ugly as I am could love me.” ― Mary Shelley, Frankenstein / “Down bad like I lost my twin.” – Taylor Swift, Down Bad

“I am malicious because I am miserable” ― Mary Shelley, Frankenstein / “Because I’m Miserable!” – Taylor Swift, I Can Do It With A Broken Heart

“One wandering thought pollutes the day” ― Mutability, Percy Blythe Shelley (Quoted in Frankenstein) / “One bad seed kills the garden” – Taylor Swift, The Albatross

“This feels like the time she fell through the ice” – Taylor Swift, The Bolter / In Frankenstein, ice is symbolic of isolation and alienation.

“Wretch” or “Wretched” is a huge word in Frankenstein / “That I’m fearsome and I’m wretched and I’m wrong.” Taylor Swift, Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me?

“In the streets there’s a raging riot” / In the story, the Monster gets chased by angry mob of townspeople 

The First Two Pages of Frankenstein by The National (The Alcott appears on this album and The National toured it with Patti Smith)

Bonus: Dr. Frankenstein is something of an anti-hero. He, along with his monster, are also sometimes referred to as Tragic Heroes. Greek philosopher Aristotle first laid out the attributes of a Tragic Hero.

So all of this to say, I had originally only been thinking about TTPD only in the context of Mary Shelly’s original Frankenstein, even though that Fortnight imagery was definitely inspired by the films. But then that quote just really felt like it had Taylor written all over it.

So I googled Bride of Frankenstein.

It's basically an "everyone lives" AU sequel to Frankenstein lol. It's the 2nd of a trilogy (...hmmm?) although the third film Son of Frankenstein has a different director. The line I heard in the guard show is said by a fictionalized version of Mary Shelley, author of Frankenstein, who "appears" in the Bride of Frankenstein movie, along with poets Lord Byron and Percy Shelly.

In the scene, Mary Shelley explains that she wanted Frankenstein to show its audience the consequences of mortal man trying to play god. She then reveals that there is more to the story than everyon thinks. This, of course, got me thinking about the term "playing god" and the Mastermind of it all, along with all of the religious/worship imagery Taylor uses on the album. Bride of Frankenstein also uses Christian/crucifixion imagery to convey this theme. 

The movie picks up right where the original Frankenstein left off. Both the doctor and the monster somehow make it out of the original story alive. Dr. Frankenstein, despite wanting to step away from his experiments after his horrific first attempt, gets pressured/blackmailed by his mentor to create a mate for the monster. While this is happening, Frankenstein's original monster is sort of bumbling around out in the world trying desperately to make a friend. This never works, as everyone is too afraid of how different he appears on the outside.

This is around where the queer reading of "The Bride of Frankenstein" comes in. I'm getting most of my info from this video, which definitely clicked things into place for me.

The queer reading is based on a few things:

The relationship between Dr. Frankenstein and Dr. Pretorius (two men creating life together)

The monster as a figure that does not fit into the norms of society and the effects of that on his search to find someone "like him"

The director, James Whale, having been one of only a few openly gay men in Hollywood at the time

The character, Dr. Pretorius', "campy" queer coding

The Bride of Frankenstein was subjected to censorship from the Hay's board while in production and by censorship boards once released

"In the decades since its release, modern film scholars have noted the possible gay reading of the film. Director James Whale was openly gay, and some of the actors in the cast, including Ernest Thesiger and, according to rumor, Colin Clive, were respectively gay or bisexual." (Wikipedia)

This reading focuses on Dr. Frankenstein's inability to stay away from his "experiments," despite having a new wife and a potential regular life waiting for him at home. He is rejecting "the natural" in favor of "the unnatural.”

This reading also looks at the monster's deep desire and inability to find belonging in a world that fears otherness. The Monster tries multiple times to make a friend, but is always rejected.

He saves a woman from drowning but she screams in fear at his appearance.

He does befriend a blind hermit and they bond and become friends! But soldiers find the Monster there and they are separated. (At this point in the story the Monster wishes he were dead again.)

Finally, the Monster gets to meet the the Bride, who was literally made for the Monster. Unfortunately, the Bride, horrified at having been brought alive for the sole purpose of being a companion, also rejects him.

Here are some connections that relate to the Frankenstein/ Bride of Frankenstein films:

"Such an audience needs something more than a pretty little love stories" / "Are you not entertained?"

Safety Pins, Bride of Frankenstein / Hairpins, Fortnight video

“Strings tied to levers"? –Taylor Swift, Robin / At the end of Bride of Frankenstein, the Monster pulls the “self-destruct” lever, killing himself, the Bride, and Dr. Pretorious (might be a stretch, but this movie is the origin of the "mad scientist self-destruct lever")

In Son of Frankenstein, Dr. Frankenstein's grandson is named Peter (definitely a stretch?)

In Bride of Frankenstein a maid character, Minnie, tries to warn the town that the Monster is still alive, but no one believes her and she says "Nobody'd believe me! All right. I wash me hands of it. They can all be murdered in their beds." (It's giving Cassandra)

In Bride of Frankenstein the Monster saves a young shepherdess from drowning / "She almost drowned in frigid water" -Taylor Swift, The Bolter

Frankenstein freaks out and accidentally burns down the hermit's cottage (the only place he found human connection, hidden away from judgmental eyes) when they are found there by two hunters

Anyway this is so so long and and doesn't even include any real analysis (I might save that for a more cohesive post) but once I got started I just kept noticing things.

Right now I think the question I'm currently trying to answer is: Frankenstein Taylor Swift the Monster or the Doctor? The Bride? The drowned girl? The almost drowned girl? The Author??

[goldenzingy46]

I am hereby returning the favour please tell me about a blorbo of your choice this is your free blorbodump pass for whenever you’d like to use it <3

GOOD AFTERNOON AND WELCOME TO THE ADAM TYLER SHOW.

who is adam, you ask? well he’s from some novel that nobody’s ever heard of called firewatching by russ thomas which is so important to me. you may recognise it from my lockscreen. i am so normal about this guy

where do i start. he has a scar on his face from where he got into a fight with a homophobic police officer. he is a cop but he works in the cold case review unit. he’s kind of terrible at his job. he has 0 personal life. he’s a terrible boyfriend and spends most of the first book running away from oscar, his one night stand. he keeps trying to adopt children but he’s bad at even that <3

if you are sweetiepie08 don’t look under the cut because there are some light spoilers (VERY light but family related <3)

he saw his dad’s “suicide” when he was fifteen. his brother used to take him (teenaged child traumatised by their father’s death) to drug dens. he’s deeply attached to his godmother (police officer) and his dad’s friend/substitute dad (also a police officer) and he nearly gets fired in the first book. he loses two boyfriends in two books. he sucks absolute shit at everything <333

like, the first time we see him he’s considering buying the house he investigated a murder in. boy get therapy

i know for a fact that he knows nothing about pop culture i can just sense it in my soul

anyway he keeps trying to adopt people. constable mina rabbini the mob boss’ son jn book 2 possibly his niece in book 3…… he’s like anti police while being a cop which is so funny. he is everything to me. he’s even gay. he once looked a mob boss in the eye and went “did you kill my dad” like BOY 😭😭

HE IS EVERYTHING. i am very sleepy and rambling i can do better faster cooler stronger later but difnwifnishdidb. biting him. putting him in a jar and shaking him.

[edutainer2022]

@lenfantdeverone , @idontknowreallywhy, @janetm74 I don't think Spotify is available in my country, so I did it longhand - just went through my mp3 playlist, trawling for everything that is "Scott" in my head (themes, lyrics, vibes, something he would like, something that goes along with some headcanons or Scott fics I read) - there's no system, but there IS a rather recognizable pattern, I guess:

Nothing_Breaks_Like_a_Heart_(Mark Ronson)

Imagine Dragons - Believer

paul_mccartney_-_hope_of_deliverance

P!nk - Try

kate-bush-Running-up-that-hill

one republic-I-aint-worried

Nickelback - Million Miles An Hour

Nickelback  -  If Today Was Your Last Day

Daniel Powter - Bad Day

Sky Full of Song (Florence & The Machine)

disturbed-The-sound-of-silence

How You Remind Me (Nickleback)

Nickelback_-_Far_Away

The Darkness - I believe in a thing called love

Metallica - Unforgiven

lp-Lost-on-you

Taylor Swift - Red (Taylor's Version) (2021)

taylor-swift-Anti-hero

shania-twain-I'm-gonna-getcha-good

Sinead_OConnor_-_Nothing_Compares_2_U

AC-DC - Thunderstruck

Kenny_Loggins_-_Danger_Zone

lady-gaga-Hold-my-hand

Hold_back_the_river_-_james_bay

bonnie-tyler-total-eclipse-of-the-heart + I need a hero

Carole King - Where You Lead

Nickelback — Trying Not To Love You

Nickelback — When We Stand Together

Nickelback_-_If_Everyone_Cared

Imagine Dragons - Thunder

The Weeknd — Blinding Lights

Harold Faltermeyer — Top Gun Anthem (Film Version)

the-smiths-How-soon-is-now

Joan_Osborne_-_One_Of_Us

Scorpions - Rock You Like a Hurricane

Bryan Adams – You Can't Take Me I'm Free

Bryan Adams – Brothers Under The Sun

Bryan Adams – Here I Am

Bryan Adams feat. Sting, Rod Stewart – All For Love (From The Three Musketeers)

maria_burmaka_- Той, той, хто зі мною/ The one with me

Fleur — Сегодня / Today

Bon Jovi – Have A Nice Day

Bon Jovi – You Give Love A Bad Name

Kansas - Carry on My Wayward Son

Green Day - Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Electric Light Orchestra - Mr. Blue Sky

Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell - Ain't No Mountain High Enough

Lyra-Falling

a-great-big-world-Say Something, I'm Giving Up on You

tom-odell-Another-love

the_pierces_-_three_wishes

Timbaland – Its too late to apologize

Simon & Garfunkel – Sound of Silence (Hello darkness, my old friend)

skillet_-_awake_and_alive

skillet-monster

Tailor Swift – I knew you were trouble

nightwish_-I_wish_i_had_an_angel

Rachel Platten – Stand By You

Shakira – Underheath your clothes

Mans Zelmerlow - Heroes

melnica_- Господин горных дорог/Lord of Mountain Roads

nickelback_-_Hero

nickelback_-_Savin'_me

Nightwish – End Of All Hope

green_day_-_Wake_me_up_when_september_ends

sekret_ Безпечный ездок/Reckless Rider

Bravo - Это за окном рассвет/ It's the dawn in the window

ChaiF - Поплачь о нём, пока он живой / Mourn him till he's alive

Keha – Die Young

kancler_gi - Брат мой, брат/ Brother mine, brother

eric_clapton_-_Blue_eyes_blue

fleur_- Расскажи мне о своей катастрофе/Tell me of your catastrophe

gary_jules_-Mad_world

Demi Livato - Give-your-heart-a-break

Lullaby (Hunger Games)

David_Guetta_feat._Sia_-_Titanium

bon_jovi_-_It's_my_life

30seconds to Mars – The Kill

The Feeling - Love It When You Call

a-ha_-_Crying_in_the_rain

Age of Information - Shattered (And-I've-lost-who-I-am)

avicii_Hey_brother

kantsler_gi- Вы ненавидите меня так страстно/ You hate me so passionately

phillip_phillips_Gone_gone_gone

Suzanne_vega_Solitude_standing

Queen- Show must go on

florence_the_machine_Seven_devils

imagine_dragons_Demons

[utilitycaster]

A lot of people who try to analyze religion in Exandria need to watch the Adventuring Academy episode where Brennan and Matt talked about worldbuilding, specifically when Matt said “In a game like dungeons and dragons, or a lot of role playing games where ultimately part of the game is to overcome villains and rise up and become a hero, there has to be some level of universal antagonism… there is a pure and defined entity or force that is evil, it may not be realistic to some stories out there, but that’s [how it works in DND].”

This is true, and it's really interesting to watch this happen because Matt will make a huge, unambiguous evil like Lucien or the Vanguard, or Brennan will do so with Asmodeus and people will do everything they can to try to come up with reasons to woobify them or argue why they're justified...but I haven't seen this happen in most of the D20 seasons, and I think it's because the villains in most D20 seasons have been things that reinforce people's beliefs, namely, capitalism and abuse of religious power. And to be clear, capitalism and abuse of religious power fucking suck, but it's telling that people assume the villain is capitalism in places where that doesn't apply on a wide scale, or in some cases, exist (EXU Calamity, Neverafter); or that the Ruby Vanguard or Tomb Takers, both of which have pretty much every single hallmark of a cult but just aren't affiliated with the main pantheon, are actually the good guys.

Incidentally: this is like, quite literally how people get sucked into cults. One of the leading cult researchers in the world, Janja Lalich, is a survivor of a now dissolved explicitly leftist/anti-capitalist cult. Abuses of power, which is, ultimately, what both Brennan and Matt lean on as their Universal Antagonist traits, rely on confirming people's existing biases and exploiting them - even if those biases are broadly good! This is in fact why I can get so fucking adamant about what is mostly silly fandom shit, because I do, on some level, look at some takes that completely lack critical thinking and am like oh you'd 100% buy into all kinds of dangerous patterns of thought if someone packaged it nicely; even something as stupid as the Caleb Werewolf Theory relied on circumstantial evidence and false information that you could easily verify was false. And it's annoying but mostly harmless in the context of fandom, but it always makes me wonder - does this person do this with political posts on social media?

Anyway getting back to the main point, I think watching/listening to Brennan commentary on Adventuring Academy is generally a really good idea because he is a very smart guy with a philosophy degree and has a strong grasp of the genres in which he works as well as TTRPGs as a storytelling medium, and talks to other people who also have a good understanding of the morality of fantasy stories. And if you listen to this, you will in fact get that the basis of evil in these stories is not something as specific as "capitalism" or "religion"; it's quite literally as basic as "exploiting other people simply because that is an option available to you and you don't care about them." And obviously that's the whole basis of capitalism, and it's a serious problem that exists within organized religion, but like...not to repeat myself from this weekend but I keep thinking about the "Suvi without the imperialism" and it's like...she is a 20 year old woman whose parents died for a cause and we have had ONE episode with her as an adult. We know nothing about the Empire except that it's an empire and it is at war. Like, can you look at imperialism and understand why it's bad? Can you separate the concept of imperalism - which, to be clear, is based on power structures - from say, your 21st century understanding of empires in the real world? Or do you see the word Empire and go "Bad Thing" without any capacity to analyze because that's how you end up looking at two flawed things in a story (well, if we're lucky; see the middle paragraph) and deciding one is perfect and correct for no reason other than because it opposes the thing you think is worse. And Brennan is REALLY good at skewering that, and Matt is REALLY good at portraying multiple complicated and flawed perspectives, but you do have to like, use your brain slightly.