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codename-adler · 4 years ago

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Kevin and his Oblivious Literature Lover, pt.III

I don’t know how many parts I can write but I keep going?? It just brings me joy and I hope it does you too <3

>> Table of Contents, TW and other parts here!

they keep this little game going for a few Mondays, where they kind of interact with each other through the lessons and have each other’s back against the rest of the class

Kevin remains at the front seat of the room and Juliet stays at the back by the window

it doesn’t mean they can’t support and encourage each other in subtle ways

when she is calm enough, Juliet will raise her hand and ask him more details about a point he brings during a lecture, because, well, she never really heard about it before and she likes to learn as much as she can (and if she likes his voice and his mannerisms more than those of their teacher, that is her own business...)

when Juliet is confident enough to speak up in class, Kevin only has to turn and stare at the students who keep interrupting or talking over her for them to shut up (he learned a bit from Andrew, after all, and if he uses that opportunity to catch a glimpse of her warm eyes, than that is his own business...)

but what happens in class stays in class; outside, they are strangers once again and go on with their life

they don’t quite forget about each other, but they can’t afford to have other priorities or distractions; we all know Kevin’s life is a mess and a fight for survival; Juliet’s is, in a word, hard...

Monday afternoons are for soldiers to rest.

then, obviously, everything goes to shit

Kengo dies, and then Jean almost dies, and then Renée brings him back and with him, all these fears and feelings and anxieties

Kevin feels guilty, guilty, guilty...

which means he is even more of an asshole to everyone

he skips class the following day, a Monday

Juliet isn’t disappointed at all, and if she happens to listen a little less that day, well that has nothing to do with it

it takes a few days for Kevin to stay more than a minute in Jean’s room at Abby’s; every time he looks at him, his heart races and he feels like throwing up, because I could’ve got him out before & I could’ve brought him with me & I could’ve done more & I knew what would happen to him & this is all my fault & I just left him there & God I’m disgusting

the faces of Jean, and Riko, and Tetsuji, and Neil, and Jean, and Thea and Neil and Seth and Jean all melt together in his mind

and Oh God Thea

instead of the pride he usually felt when thinking of her, he felt fear

but no, that wasn’t quite true; the fear had always been there, burried under pride and satisfaction; now fear was the strongest

after the game on Friday, Kevin spent all night in Jean’s room, watching him from a chair and thinking, just thinking everything over and over again

they didn’t speak, except for when Kevin reassured Jean after nightmares, in a low voice that barely resembled his usually rough tone

somewhere in the night, the reassurances became as much of a mantra for Jean as for Kevin

on Saturday morning, still in Jean’s room, Kevin called Thea.

he asked her if she heard about Kengo (of course I did) and how she felt about it (well I just hope someone is there for Riko, seeing as you left him and Jean was never of much comfort)

(she couldn’t know about Jean yet, but still)

Kevin hangs up

then he calls her back

“I don’t want to be in a relationship with you anymore, Thea.”

“I see. Okay. Goodbye, Kevin.”

and that was the end of it

Jean just stares at him from his bed as silent tears fill his eyes

his mind reeling from everything still, Kevin slowly gets up from his chair to go kneel by Jean’s head; with as much care as he ever could, he caresses the back of Jean’s neck, mindful of not touching any wound

as Kevin’s forehead touches with Jean’s, both boys finally exhale

it is not peace. it is not forgivness. it is not shame, nor guilt.

they are simply two boys who will forever be tangled up in themselves no matter where they are, because they lived through too much together to leave the other behind without feeling like losing a limb

so Kevin stays, this time. he stays all weekend with Jean, wiping away his tears and organizing a future of possibilities for the boy he should have brought with him when he left the Nest

but as soon as he leaves Jean’s side, which is a grand total of four times that weekend, Kevin puts his professional mask on and goes on as if his world wasn’t crumbling down again

so on Monday, Kevin goes to class on the one condition that Abby pulls him out if anything happens with Jean

his mind is still a jumbled mess of Jean/Riko/Thea/Neil/Tetsuji, and sometimes an angelic face with frizzy hair flashes through, but not long enough for him to wonder

which is why he is pulled out of his memories when the teacher announces the group project they’d warned them about at the beginning of the semester

groups of two, maximum three; present two pieces of literature, one from Early America, one from the 21st century inspired by your choice of Early American Literature (no, brandon, you cannot choose The Patriot, it is shit at accuracy); you must each speak for 12 minutes; this thing is due before your finals, LET’S GO PEOPLE

as usual, Kevin assumes he’ll work it out alone, no teacher had ever complained and he just wasn’t in the mood to chit-chat with people who had no consideration for accuracy while Jean was still in a critical state for Christ’s sake!

meanwhile, Juliet was silently chewing her lips until the first layer of skin is torn away, anxiety levels at their highest since a long time; she didn’t know anybody in the class even after a whole semester, she didn’t have any friends, nobody to talk to or to pair up with... well, not anyone who would want to

it takes her everything to get out of her head and move from her desk to the front of the class

“Hi.”

Kevin looks up from his laptop, and there she is

she has a dimple on her right cheek, because she’s stressed out and it translates into a nervous smirk on her lips

“Okay, so... I’m alone. You’re... well, not accompanied, so I was wondering if maybe you’d agree to pair up? I think we’d work great together, you seem to be really invested in your studies. I respect that. Does that... Would you like that?”, Juliet musters up the courage to ask him

“Yes, it’s a good idea”, Kevin replies in slow-motion before even thinking it through

“Really?”, Juliet lets out, disbelieving that her idea even worked out

“Yes...? It’s Juliet?”, Kevin asks even though he knows perfectly well he’d never forget her name. “I’m-” he starts again

“Kevin, yeah, I remember. I mean, it’s kinda hard to forget” Juliet blurts out

she had known all along, hadn’t she?

“You like exy?”, Kevin almost spits back, all warmth gone from his eyes and his jaw heavily clenched

“Uh... The sport with the stick and the ball?”, Juliet tries, visibly lost

“Something like that”, Kevin answers

“I mean, no, I don’t care for it. If you tell me to observe the dynamics between the players and among the team, though, or if you want me to write about it, I might care... Why? It comes from Early America? Is that what you’d like to work on?”, Juliet responds

she doesn’t have a clue, does she?

“No, it’s... nothing. Forget it”, Kevin says slowly. “What did you mean by ‘hard to forget’?”

“Oh. God. Don’t take it personally, but hum, you’re taller that six feet? Sitting right in front of the class? And I know it’s my fault for sitting in the back, but me and my five foot two really can’t see shit. But then you also seem to have endless secret knowledge up your sleeves and it’s made this class a little more tolerable, so, I forgive you for you height of titan.” Juliet rushes out, despite her embarrassment

she is absolutely clueless. he’s just Kevin the huge nerd to her.

he’s not even bothered by the stickball comment

he’s not even bothered by her complete lack of interest

she doesn’t bother him at all

“Are you sure you’re okay with me? I’ve been told no before, I can take it. It just seemed like a logical idea and-”, Juliet mumbles anxiously

“I’m good. I’m ready when you are”, Kevin cuts her off

her smile was not everything, it was not exy and it was not thea ‘s nor jean’s, but it was a smile untouched by his monsters

and he liked that

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side-effect-of-the-meds · 5 years ago

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Can you please tell us more about the girls’ relationship in the fem andreil!ravens au? It seemed a bit brusque to change the perspective from Ania and Riko making out to “anyway, Erin and Ania get together” :))). I just want to see my girls be happy and I’m sorry if this sounded weird, but I’m usually really big on seeing the development process of a relationship/character.

It’s not weird at all, love! I just didn’t feel like writing bc a) I’m lazy and b) my mom kept looking over my shoulder at my phone and I hate when people see me write. Now that I’m alone in my room, let’s get cracking.

In exchange for Erin coming to Evermore, Riko offers to take care of Aaron n Nicky. The boys are living in the lap of luxury for like two years. They’re moved to a much nicer house and have a butler, chef, maids, chauffeurs, etc. In reality, it’s how Riko intends to keep Erin in check. If she screws up, there’s like twenty people that can and will kill her family.

The boys are oblivious to EVERYTHING THE ENTIRE TIME. Nothing ever happens to them to tip them off either. When Erin and Ania run, they’re still taken care of bc Ichirou intervenes and he outranks Riko and The Master. He does it bc he wants to take a different approach from Kengo. He wants to use as little violence to solve his problems as possible. Of course, he has no problem torturing and killing ppl should the need arise. The boys only find out years later when the ex-Ravens are talking.

“What do you mean the Moriyamas were in the mafia?!?!?!”

“Oh yeahhhhh. We forgot to tell you, didn’t we? That’s why you were living in that house. If Erin ever disobeyed them, they were going to kill you.” They say this super casually in front of Katelyn, Erik, Jeremy, Thea, and all their kids.

Now the girls and the Ravens

First of all, only the perfect court call her Ania. Everyone else calls her Wesninski.

Erin calls her various terms of endearment on the court bc it pisses Ania off. Riko is ready to fight. Kevin and Jeanie are betting on how long it’ll take before Ania leaves Ko for Erin.

Ania and Erin two are paired off the way all ravens are. For every mistake Erin makes, Ania is the one paying for it. They spend a lot of nights running suicides up and down the court or playing until Ania blows her arms out. Riko will sit on the sidelines and watch. Night is the only time Ania really plays as a striker so she stands there taking shots on goal while Erin has to deflect them. Ania has collapsed more than once on those nights. Kevin and Jeanie are always sent to drag her back up. If she collapses again, Riko will take her off the court and Kevin will take Ania’s place until they return. After about half an hour, Ania will limp back out, clutching her gut.

Erin doesn’t find out for a long time but every time Riko has to drag Ania off the court, she throws her onto the cold concrete and kicks her until she’s coughing up blood.

Ania blames her constant abuse on Erin. She hates her so so much.

It hurts Erin to know Ania hates her but she isn’t going to try to change her mind. It takes a lot of energy out of a person to hate someone. Erin consoles herself by reminding herself that if Ania hates her, it means she’s thinking about her.

Every weekend, Ania disappears. The dorms feel empty because it’s where Ania is supposed to be. Erin can’t stand staying alone in their dorm which is how she finds the roof access. She smokes her cigarettes and stares up at the night sky. Castle Evermore is p far from Edgar Allen and is actually p far from the developed world. Alone on the rooftop, Erin feels like the only person in the world. It’s lonely in a different kind of way.

Once school actually starts up, Erin is exhausted all the time. She can barely keep her eyes open n she’s covered in bruises all the time. Since Erin and Ania are paired off, Ania always waits for her in their dorms with a first aid kit. She spends about an hour every night cleaning up and cuts, icing her bruises, and massaging her with muscle ache relief cream. Ania is really rough about all of it but it’s still really domestic. Erin might not be on her meds but by the time Ania is finished, she feels just as high.

Ania doesn’t ever let Erin do any of it for her. She also doesn’t change with any of the other girls or shower in the locker rooms. Erin is intrigued.

On Friday nights, Ania drinks. When I say drinks, I mean she goes through a bottle of Grey Goose like it’s just water. Fridays are the only nights when Riko shares Ania so everyone stays up late to watch her. She’ll get drunk in the common room and dance. Anyone who gets within arms’ reach is getting dragged onto the dance floor with her. It’s the only time the Ravens get to let loose. The only reason they get away with any of it is bc Tetsuji has board meetings on Fridays.

Erin avoids the common room like a plague. Ania dances dirty and Erin isn’t going to survive watching her dance with anyone but her. She passed by once and Ania ambushed her with the intention of dragging her off with her. When she realized who she was standing in front of she grimaced and left without another word. </3

The reason Ania gets herself drunk on Fridays is because her father comes to pick her up at like 4 a.m. on Saturdays. She comes home at 3 a.m on Mondays and is thrown back on the court an hour later still nursing her new cuts and bruises.

The girls only become friends after Erin becomes a member of the perfect court. She gets inducted during Christmas at Evermore. Riko runs Erin ragged on the court for the two weeks of winter break and Erin is actually convinced that she’s going to die. They strap her down and tattoo her at Midnight on Christmas. The Master gives the Ravens Christmas off to celebrate the newest member of the perfect court. Erin refuses to leave her room that day. She finds a knife and is about to start layering cuts over it in an attempt to cover it up when Ania finds her.

Ania pins Erin down and wrenches the knife out of her hand. Suddenly, they’re rolling on the floor fighting. No, they aren’t fighting. Erin is beating the shit out of Ania. Her fists are a blur. Pipe dream or not, Erin’s survival instincts override everything. She only stops when she realizes that Ania isn’t fighting back. Like… at all. To her horror, Erin looks down and sees Ania’s eyes glazed over.

Once when Erin still lived with Drake, he’d pinned her against a wall and took her then and there. She had caught a glimpse of her reflection in a mirror, her eyes glazed over and empty. Ania looked like that now.

She got off of Ania and scrambled back into a corner. What have I done? she thinks. She can barely breathe. She’s medicated so she starts to laugh. It’s a horrible sound. She’s in utter hysterics as the tears flow down her face.

“Erin,” Ania’s voice is just barely there. “Erin,” she calls again. Slowly, Erin crawls over to Ania’s crumpled form. “Stop laughing.” Erin clamps her hands over her mouth. It does little to stifle her laughter. “Get out,” Ania whispers. Her eyes are still blankly staring at the ceiling. Erin runs. She vaults up the stairs to the roof. Standing at the edge of the roof, she considers just jumping. There’s no way she can face Ania after that. She goes through a whole pack of cigarettes before she comes back down. By then, the sun has set. Ania isn’t in their room. There had been blood on the carpet from when Ania’s mouth and nose. All of it was gone.

“Minyard.” Erin whirled around to see Jean standing behind her. “Come on,” he says motioning towards the door. Erin doesn’t move. “Ania wants to see you.” Erin is on her feet at the sound of Ania’s name alone. Jean smirks knowingly at her and leads her down the hall to Riko’s room. He pushes the door open and walks in. Erin enters to find the rest of the perfect court already there. Riko is sitting on a recliner like its a throne. Kevin is perched on one of the armrests and Ania on the other. For the first time, Erin sees Ania with her shirt off. She’s no longer medicated but she still can barely keep her apathetic facade up.

Almost every inch of Ania’s skin is cut up and burned. Scars race up and down her beautiful body. There’s nothing in the world Erin wants more than to trace over every one of them with her eyes, her fingers, her lips. Ice packs are strapped to Ania’s chest, undoubtedly covering he bruises Erin had given her a few hours ago.

“Erin,” Riko said with a false kindness in her voice. It takes everything in her to pry her eyes off Ania. “I welcome you to my court and this is how you repay me? By hurting my beloved little Ania?” Riko shook her head, disappointed. “How about I do you another favor? We’ll see how much you like this new one.” Everything in Erin’s mind is screaming for her to run. She’s about to when Ania rockets out of her seat.

“Ko, it’s nothing. I’m fine,” she insists. Riko turns her gaze to Ania. “Look, it was my fault. I’ve always been better at picking fights than winning them, right?” She offered Riko a sheepish smile. Riko narrowed her eyes at her. Suddenly, her arm shot out and grabbed a fistful of Ania’s hair. She wrenched it and brought Ania to her knees with a single flick of her wrist. Erin was moving before she could process it. Arm’s wrapped around her, lifting her clear off the ground. She bit and kicked at him but Jean was far bigger and far stronger than she was. The sound of Ania’s voice stopped her. Riko had been hissing at her in Japanese from the second she’d brought Ania to her knees. Now, Ania was speaking in a soft sultry voice. The malicious glint was gone from Riko’s eyes. Slowly, a lustful look replaced it. Erin caught the fearful look Kevin cast Jean. She wriggled just enough to catch the worried one Jean sent back. Erin didn’t know what was happening, but she knew it wasn’t good.

“Very well, Ania. I’ll give her one more chance for you, my love.” Riko said in English. “I don’t think you understand just how lucky you are, Ms. Minyard. If it weren’t for Ania, you’d be back in Columbia watching your beloved brother bleed out.” Erin froze. “I’m giving you one more chance, alright? One more toe out of line and… Well, you’ll see.” Riko’s manic laughter had nothing on the drug-induced one that had poured out of Erin earlier that day. Erin had thought that she’d known fear before. She was wrong.

From there, Erin isn’t usually in trouble. She’s far too afraid of Aaron getting hurt to play. Gambling with her life was one thing, Aaron’s was something else. Sometimes she’ll pick fights with the other members of the perfect court bc of her meds. However, she suddenly realizes that the bruises covering Ania’s skin only ever appear when Erin steps out of line. Ania picks fights with everyone but no one but Kevin raises a hand at her.

A lot of days, the Ravens break for lunch to leave Kevin and Ania brawling on the court. As a member of the perfect court, Erin is now privy to everything happening between them. Jean is the one who tells her tho.

Jean- no. It’s Jeanie explains to Erin about her gender. Erin had heard about trans people before, but she’d never met a trans person before. Her etiquette on the matter takes a while to develop so she just doesn’t say anything about it while medicated. She does work really hard to support Jeanie tho. She relearns Jeanie’s name and preferred pronouns. It isn’t hard. Jeanie also tells her about Kev and Riko’s sexualities and false relationships. Erin slips up and lets herself slip. She asks about Ania and Jeanie smiles slyly. None of them know what demisexuality is (i didn't even know about this until AFTG) so Jeanie just says that Ania doesn’t swing. She’s with Riko but she isn’t romantically interested in her. Or sexually for that matter. “I mean they’re not not together,” Jeanie said with a shrug.

Since Erin is now a part of the perfect court, she and Ania are forced to spend a lot more time together. They now have to sit together for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Ania is a first yr so she and Erin have the same schedule. Like the exact same. They used to sit on opposite ends of the room but since whatever it was that happened during Christmas, Ania isn’t leaving Erin’s side.

It’s tense at first tho. Neither of them is speaking. They do their hw together and the only sounds in their room are the scratch of their pencils on paper or the tapping of keys on the computer.

It isn’t until a few weeks after the break that they start becoming friends. It happens when Ania seems to be struggling to study for their English test. They were supposed to read Dune but the book is nearly 800 pages and Ania is dyslexic. It hasn’t been diagnosed bc she was homeschooled but Erin picks up on the telltale signs. She only knows bc Aaron was too. How he managed to survive a schedule of AP classes and make straight 5’s on all his exams, Erin didn’t know. She was hella proud tho.

Erin snatches the book from Ania’s hand and heads out. She knows Ania will follow. She leads a fuming Ania to the roof access and up the stairs. When she steps out onto the roof, she turns to look back. Ania is looking up at the stars with wide eyes.

“The view,” she whispered, mesmerized. “It’s beautiful.”

“Yeah, it is,” Erin replied, unable to drag her eyes off of Ania. Ania huffs a laugh still staring up. Erin just barely manages to tear her gaze off her before she looks over. Erin sits down, cross-legged. It’s freezing outside but her sweats are fairly thick. Ania, however, is shivering. She sits down beside Erin, leaving a little space between the two of them. “I will do this once and only once. Understand?” Erin asked. Ania nods, confused. Erin sets the book down and drags Ania into her lap, enveloping her in her arms. “If you freeze, Riko will have my head,” Erin muttered. Ania nodded, doing her best to suppress a smile. Turning her phone flashlight on, Erin opened the book up to where Ania had left off.

For the next two hours, Erin sat there with Ania curled tightly against her chest reading the book. Whenever Erin began to think that Ania had fallen asleep, she’d interject with some strangely amusing commentary. For the first time in Erin’s life, she felt something other than anger. In its place, she felt soft and warm. Erin shook her head. It was probably just Ania’s body heat.

“Erin?” Ania asked, stifling a yawn as they headed back downstairs. Erin turned to look at her. “Thanks.”

“Whatever,” Erin said. She heard Ania laugh softly. Laying in bed, Erin could still feel the warmth of Ania’s body on her chest. She didn’t get a single hour of sleep that night.

It only takes one more late-night trip to the roof to finish the book but the rooftop meetings become a thing. Ania doesn’t smoke but she breathes in Erin’s second-hand smoke which is still p bad for her lungs but we’re going to ignore that.

Erin isn’t great at math so Ania will tutor her in that but they do that in their room. The roofs become a sacred tradition not to be tainted with the hellish concepts of math.

They first start trading secrets because Erin really just doesn’t want to listen to Ania talk about exy all the time.

Ania tells Erin about how her mother used to beat her and Erin tells her about her self harm scars.

Ania tells Erin that she’s killed people and Erin tells her about the boy who shoved her into a closet and stuck his hands in her pants. She had snapped his neck and thrown him in the river. She almost laughs when Ania criticizes her method.

“You should have arranged for him to fall off a jungle gym and break his neck from the fall.”

Late one Sunday night, Erin comes down from the roof to find Ania in the kitchen. She had come home from her father’s place early and disappeared into Riko’s room right after. Now she was pressing a bag of frozen peas to the bruise on her eye. There were open cuts all over her torso.

That’s when Erin pieces it together. The scars on Ania’s body aren’t from her father. They were from Riko.

Erin’s blood is boiling. She’s going to kill Riko when a hand clasps around her wrist.

“Erin, no,” Ania hisses.

“You can’t let her get away with this,” Erin snaps, wrenching her wrist out of Ania’s. She knows her anger is showing in her eyes but she can’t help it.

“Erin, please.”

“I hate that word.”

“Then don’t make me say it.” Erin looks into Ania’s eyes and sees her, really sees her for the first time. The ice in her eyes doesn’t end there. It’s in her veins too. Nathania Wesninski isn’t just some Exy junkie, she realizes. Nathania is just a girl trying her very best to be more than she is. Jeanie had already told Erin who Nathania’s father was. Erin had never met the Butcher of Baltimore but she’d heard stories. He was cold-blooded and ruthless. He was fierce and fearless. He was unbreakable. Looking at Ania now, she didn’t doubt that she was his daughter. Erin turned and motioned for Ania to follow her. She led her back to the dorms and shoved her down onto the bed. She turned to leave and Ania caught her wrist again.

“Don’t touch me,” Erin said. Ania nodded as she let go. “I’ll be back.” Erin headed straight for the bathroom and dug the first aid kit out from under the sink. She returned to find Ania picking at the bedspread. She looked up at Erin. A small smile tugged at her lips when she saw what was in Erin’s hands. Erin scowled. She was equal parts annoyed and elated to see Ania’s smile stretch across her face. Slowly, Erin cleaned every cut and bandaged them up. When she finished, she stepped back to inspect her handiwork. Satisfied, she turned to leave.

“Erin,” Ania said. Erin turned back to look at her. Ania extended her hands towards her face in a silent request. Erin obeyed. On her knees, she was about a head shorter than Ania. Ania cupped her hands around Erin’s pressed her forehead to Erin’s, staring into her eyes. She felt Ania’s hands drop away.

“Yes or no,” Erin whispered. Confusion swept through Ania’s eyes.

“Yes?” she said uncertainly. Erin took it She pressed a soft, swift kiss to Ania’s lips. As she drew back, Ania followed. “Don’t leave,” she whispered against Erin’s lips. The words shook Erin to her core.

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” she replied. She kissed Ania again, this time with far more passion. She poured all her pent up feelings into it. Ania didn’t shy from it. In fact, she pressed right back, matching Erin’s intensity. Erin could hear the scrape of Ania’s nails against her bedframe as she curled them, doing her best not to reach out. Erin had always been a sucker for a pretty face but Ania’s dirty mouth would be the death of her. She had absolutely no self-control. Or so Erin had thought.

She’d seen Ania kissing Riko before. Ania’s hands never remained in one place for long. Instead, they roved every inch of exposed skin. The fact that she was actively working to control herself for Erin drove her wild. No one had ever done anything for Erin her whole life. And now? Now Erin was kneeling in front of a woman mustering up every drop of self-control she had so that Erin wouldn’t leave.

“Fuck,” Erin moaned into the kiss. She felt the smile gracing Ania’s lips and growled softly. “Not a word, Wesninski.”

“Don’t call me by that name,” Ania replied. Erin pulled back to look at her. They stared at each other. Even in the pale yellow light cast by her bedside lamp, Ania was the most beautiful woman Erin had ever seen. “Alora. I’m Nathania Alora Wesninski but I want you to call me Alora.”

“Alora,” Erin said softly.

“Do you like it?” Ania asked. “I thought you’d appreciate the irony.” Erin just stared at her. “It’s Latin. It means bay tree but some say it means ‘My Dream’ as well. That’s perfect for you,” Ania whispered as she leaned back into Erin’s space. Against her lips, she murmured, “Because I am your pipe dream.” That dirty mouth really was going to be the death of Erin.

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