#like damn what is this ram ranch???
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eruhamster · 3 months ago
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pulling out this insanely baffling one i saw on twitter once
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girls is it a degenerate sin to press your lover's forehead to yours during intercourse
Are we calling women who read shitty harlequin romance novels porn addicts now?
If you read one paragraph of vintage victorian smut you'd hurl.
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thatsthewrongwallcraig · 1 year ago
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kappa and reader while on their roadtrip decide to go out on a cutsie date they end up in some bar there’s live music great atmosphere they get p drunk & things escalate as they get back to their van 🤭…
Someone send help, I want him so bad 😩😩
Fairy Lights
Summary: Just a silly, little drabble about van life with Kappa 😌🌻
Pairing: Kappa x fem!Reader
Word Count: ~1k
Content Warnings: Soft Horny Hippie Smut 18+!, Unprotected P In V, Oral (F Receiving), Fingering, Cum Eating, Mentions About Alcohol And Being Drunk, Kappa's Dirty Talk, Breeding, Possible Impreg
A/N: We are gradually working towards Dad!Kappa and I see absolutely nothing wrong with that 🥴
Tagging the horny horde:
@crypticsewerslut @quicksilversg1rl @cc-luvr @icarus-star @milaeth @roryculkinsgf @spookyorchid @arch1viste @whoareyoi @angelsanarchy @blueberrypancakesworld @rocketqueen-world @r0ttenmess @doddernix @svgarcaine
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Let me take you to the movies
Can I take you to the show?
Let me be yours ever truly
Can I make your garden grow?
- Houses Of The Holy By Led Zeppelin
"Fuck!", You sighed while hastily wiggling your ass out of your lacey slip, "The guitarist did a damn good job, no?"
"Maybe, but I don't give a wet fart about that right now!" Kappa huffed as he shimmied himself out of his pants equally clumsy, his already rock-hard, eager cock thudding against his lower abdomen.
With a wide grin playing around his lips, he looked at you, his pupils blown wide in desire and adoration as he propped your thighs on his shoulders before thrusting himself into you as far as he possibly could.
"Good lord, Kappa!", You exhaled sharply, your head lolling back deep into a tie-dye patterned pillow, "You fuck like a madman when your drunk!"
"All I hear is you saying that I don't fuck you just right when I'm sober, honey." Kappa quipped right back, the palms of his hands snaking themselves around your thighs to pull you impossibly close to him.
"That's not..ugh, fuck.." You heard your trembling voice flailing as he started rolling his hips against your lap, rendering your mind blank with each jut.
"That's not what?" He teased with a mischievous grin spreading all over his face whilst the tip of his nose lovingly caressed yours.
You smelled the alcohol in his breath, the countless cheap beers and whisky shots both of you had oh so eagerly chugged down at the bar. In a feverish shot of sudden worry, you gasped at your man.
"Shit, fuck…what if anybody sees us?" Your brain abruptly recalled the fact that the two of you were fucking in a goddamn parking lot.
"We're in the van, sugar.", Kappa cooed into your ear from above, "The car might be shakin' a lil' but that's all, don't worry."
He pressed a sloppy kiss to your temple while thrusting into you, his girth stretching you out just the way you liked it.
"You sure?" You couldn't quite let it go just now.
"Just shut up and let me make you feel good, been thinking about that all night long.", He groaned against the shell of your ear, effectively sending a wave of goosebumps down your back, "Nothing on my mind but you since you started dancing, practically eye-fucking me while twirling that dress of yours."
" 'N I thought we were having a cute date night out, babe.", You giggled out of breath, turning your head to catch his mouth, teasingly biting down on his bottom lip, "All while you were just thinking 'bout filling me up, huh?"
"Uh-Huh.." It rolled over his tongue in a low moan, his face following the gentle tug of your teeth as your shaking fingers wrapped around his forearms, holding on to him, "Been thinking about knocking you up lately. How'd 'u like that, hm?"
Just the mere thought of it had your throbbing cunt clenching down around his cock, pulling him deeper into you.
"Oh, okay…", Kappa huffed in surprise, picking up his pace and practically ramming himself into you without holding back, "Getting you all worked up, no? Wanna be a momma so bad?"
"A little mini-us… a ranch, big garden and all, maybe?" You rambled out in between raggedy breaths, feeling your body buzzing with the mixture of intoxication and an oncoming orgasm.
"Shit, fuck…that sound so good, babe.", His hips progressively faltered in their rhythm, "Gon' fill you all up, sugar."
It took but a few more thrusts, his balls slapping against your ass, before he spearheaded deep into you for one last time, his cock pulsing and pumping out hot ribbons of his seed.
"Hmhmm…don't stop, please, boutta cum, too!" You whined as you felt him stopping, moans and filthy curses cascading out of his mouth as his climax washed through him.
"Fuck, sorry, lemme fix that, sunshine." Kappa groaned, reluctantly pulling out of you but leaving your twitching legs right on top of his shoulders as his head wandered down amidst your quivering thighs.
He wasted absolutely no second thought about parting your cum and slick soaked folds with his tongue, directly aiming for your needy clit while his release trickled out of you.
"Taste so good.." He hummed into your cunt, sending a tide of pleasure through your body, your nerves starting to tingle and buzz again.
"Have ta make sure all that stays nice 'n put…" Kappas low tone vibrated through you as two of his fingers pushed into you, gently fucking his cum back into you.
Just that sent you right over the edge, your walls clenching and pulling all around his fingers as you involuntarily wiggled your ass over the mattress in orgasmic convulsions, practically riding your climax out on his tongue that was flat against your throbbing clit.
"There you go, sugar." You heard his shit-eating grin before you even saw it as he slipped your legs from his shoulder, his face rising back up to yours again.
With a content humm, Kappa let himself slump down next to you, cradling your form in his arms while reaching out to the side to fish for a halfway full cup of tea from way earlier in the day.
"Drink up, love, don't wanna deal with a hangover later, no?" He pressed a kiss to the top of your head, his sweaty skin glowing in a post-orgasmic shine and the soft hue of the tiny fairy lights stuck to the ceiling of the van.
"Even if…'m just gonna pout at you until you fuck the hangover out of me, hm?"
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horseshoegirl · 2 years ago
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Damn Those Dog Tags: Part 10 - Let's Dance
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📝 Okay, Peeps! This is pure fluff with some spice! I also love this song, so please check it out!
Speaking of songs, I made the official playlist for this fic! Not sure if you guys listen, but it's linked in the master list if you guys want to check it out!
18+ minors DNI. Ageless and blank blogs are blocked without warning.
❗+18, strong language, godmother reader/original female character, original child, sexual themes (I mean Smut, so get outta here if you ain't +18), mentions of a stalker, grieving, and shitty family dynamics.
#7k Words
Part 9 | Masterlist | Part 11
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You never expected Jake to want to take you to the annual state fair for your first date. It seemed out of character for someone like him. Then you realized it didn't seem that farfetched. If he grew up on a ranch in Texas, he probably went to these all the time.
You had been at the grocery store when his text came through. Jake had sent you the flyer, along with a message.
You. Me. Saturday + Dinner ;)
And before you could reply, there was another text. 
Penny was going to take Sadie sailing away.
While some part of you was slightly surprised he followed through on his ask, you had to glance down both ends of the baking aisle to make sure you were alone before squealing and jogging a little on the spot.
It had been a few days since the hallway. Jake and you spent at least another half hour tied up in each other's arms, and you practically had to peel yourself away from him. You were so giddy the rest of the morning, and then some, after you had forced yourself to go back to bed, trying to stay as still as possible with Nat still asleep next to you.
Sitting across from him at breakfast, he acted as if nothing had happened between the two of you, that he was just friendly Jake, leading you to believe maybe it had all been a fever dream caused by the discomfort of the storm.  
But when he went to place his glass in the sink while you were washing the dishes, he slyly touched your hip, letting his fingers slide across the fabric of your jeans just below your waistline, whispering, "Thank you, Darlin'" roughly into your ear before he returned to the table. 
Yup, definitely not a dream.
So while you were working with Penny the day before the date, she didn’t waste the opportunity to grill you about it. Hard. 
“You have a date.” 
You blushed. “Penny..” 
“Where is he taking you?” she pressed.
“He didn’t tell you, seeing as you're now his accomplice?” you countered, trying to finish mixing a cocktail someone ordered.
“Tell who what?”
Your head shot up to see Phoenix leaning up against the bar. "When did you get here? Why are you here?"
“I’m helping Penny with something. Now spill…” 
Penny beat you to it, leaning over the bar and resting on her elbows when she told Nat, “Liz has a date. With Hangman.”
Nat smirked. “Oh, so him pressing you up against the wall in your hallway didn’t do it?” 
“Elizabeth Beck!” Penny gasped.  You squealed, dropping to the ground behind the bar, Phoenix laughing at your antics. “I can’t believe you saw that.” 
“I had to go to the bathroom,” Nat said like it was obvious. “It’s not every day you see your best friend getting rammed up against a wall like that.” 
“Oh, good lord.” 
"Get back up here," Penny tapped your leg with herself softly, you standing up with a blush overcoming your face. She wrapped her arm around your waist, pulling you into her side.
"Tell us," she tried again. "We aren't judging. We just want details."
You relented, quickly sputtering, "He's taking me to the fair."
They oo'd in response, making you shy away from Penny and reach for the drink you made, walking over to the person who ordered it sitting on the other side of the bar. 
Nat followed you, quickly asking, "What will you wear? Something sexy?"
You glowered at her once you placed the drink down. "It's the fair, Nat."
Penny wasn't that far behind, bumping you on the hip. "There's nothing wrong with showing off."
You stuttered, trying to come up with some response that wasn't your usual reply of, 'I'm not like that,’ until someone shouted for Penny, distracting the three of you. She pouted, realizing the conversation would continue without her before leaving you and Phoenix alone. 
“I’m just teasing you,” Nat offered. “I said I would back you up with this, and I will.”
You paused, gripping the edge of the bar. “Does the rest of the team know?” you asked hesitantly. 
Nat shook her head. “I think Coyote knows something. He’s the closest with Jake.” 
It struck you momentarily that this was the first time you heard Nat refer to Jake by his first name. It was always Hangman or Bagman. His last name was even rarer. It might have been a small change, but it showed you Nat was serious about this. It brought a small smile to your face. 
“As for the others, Payback and Fanboy are off in their own world half the time to notice, and Bob is too shy to let on. I can’t say anything about Bradley, though.” 
You frowned. This wasn’t the first time you thought about Bradley and what he might say or do if he found out. He was so heated on New Year's. If he reacted that badly, what would be his reaction when he found out his claims weren’t exactly untrue?
"Can we not tell Bradley? At least for now?” 
Nat shot you a look. “Really?”
“I’m serious, Nat. He was so angry on New Year's Eve. It was scary.”
"Maybe he has a crush on you."
You wretched, the action making you hack. “Ew, no way. He's like a brother to me.”
"Then you should really tell him."
You shook your head. "It's just one date, Nat. I have no idea if anything will come of it."
She slapped your forearm, exclaiming,  "We both know that's not true. You so have it for Hangman. It's not funny."
"It's one date. Besides," you shrugged before saying, "I think it has to do with Sadie."
“Those two have a professional rivalry,” She said thoughtfully. “Maybe it’s extending over to whoever is the better uncle.” 
“God, I hope not,” you shuttered. It was one thing to argue about who the better pilot was. It was another to include Sadie into the mix.
At the mention of Sadie, you looked up at the time, realizing you were five minutes over your shift and late to pick her up. “Shit, I'm late. I gotta go pick Sadie up from Soccer practice.”
Natasha leaned back from the bar, ready to return to what she was helping Penny with but not before saying, “Just think about it, Liz. It should come from you rather than anyone else.”
Saying a quick goodbye to Penny, you clocked out and gathered your bag. But as soon as you walked out the doors, that damn white car was the first thing you saw.
This car always seemed to be there - it hadn’t done anything but park in the Hard Deck parking lot and was driving you insane. You strangely found yourself looking for it when you drove around town. Or in the parking lot of Sadie’s school. You thought you saw it once parked outside of your house but played it off as being paranoid. 
You usually weren’t this suspicious or obsessive about these things, but it was enough to make you feel concerned. Turning on your heel, you marched back into the Hard Deck, Penny frowning from behind the bar when she saw you. 
“Have you seen that car before, Penny? The white one with the spoiler on the back?” 
You could tell she was thinking about it, pinching her eyebrows together before finally recalling, “Oh, it was a nice young man looking for a surf spot. He came in one day asking, and I told him about the overnight rule.”
You heard nothing beyond young man. “You remember the night I closed? You told Jake I was closing by myself?” 
She nodded. “Yeah, that was a little while ago.”
“That car was there then. It would have been too early for surfers.”
But she only shook her head. “With everything that's happened with CPS and that letter, I’m sure you're just being paranoid, Liz,” she said before walking over to the other side of the bar with a drink in her hand.
If you could only believe it was just paranoia.
__
Jake was going to pick you up at 11, and it being 10:30, you were still stressing over what to wear. Your bedroom looked like the morning of the hike. Clothes flung in every corner, hangers hanging off random hooks and knobs.
Everything you held up against yourself to look at in the mirror either felt too plain or too out there for a state fair. You needed help, and you needed it badly. You pulled out your phone, scrolling down your contacts, stopping when your fingers hovered over Ridely's number.
But then, instantly, you remember you couldn’t call her. You slid down the footboard of your bed, back hurting with the effort as your phone dangled from your fingertips, your head hung low between your legs. 
She would always ask you when you called if you had met anyone, if you had gone on any dates, teasing you and telling you repeatedly that you needed someone in your life. But now, you couldn’t even tell her you were going on a date. You couldn’t call her afterwards and talk about it like sisters could. 
She’d never get to meet Jake. To give him a shovel talk like you did with her dates. The two would never sit across from each other at the dinner table, bickering with each other like you were sure they would, their personalities clashing hard. She wouldn't have approved of him initially, much like you hadn't. But she would have warmed up to him by knowing how good he was with Sadie.
But then you spiralled, admonishing yourself for thinking that far ahead. It was only a first date. By the end of today, you might come to find you had a horrible time, and any chance at any type of relationship with Jake would be ruined.
It was only a first date.
And you couldn't tell her.
The sobs worked their way up your throat before you knew you were crying, begging to be let out and heard. Tears streamed down your face, the drops pooling on your bedroom floor.
But then Sadie’s voice carried from your front door, shouting out that Aunt Penny and Nat were here. You scrambled to get up, reaching for the closest piece of clothing to put away. 
Penny appeared in your doorway as you wiped at your face, attempting to fold up a sweater. She carefully walked up behind you, placing her hand on your shoulder. But her touch was too much, and you turned, pulling her into a hug, the tears you tried so hard to stop refusing to listen to you.
"I'm so sorry, Penny," you wept into her shoulder. It didn't help when you opened your eyes over her shoulder, the shoebox was the first thing you saw sitting up on the top shelf.
Penny hushed you, her voice wavering as she stroked your back soothingly, "Nope, you're not apologizing for that. Let it out, Liz." 
"I just..." you gasped as another sob wracked your chest. But Penny pulled back, taking your face between her hands, her thumbs wiping away your running mascara. 
"You'd don't need to tell me. We all know you miss her."
Penny let you cry into her chest for a few minutes, her own tears starting to mix with yours, before pressing a kiss to your forehead and reaching for a button-up blouse lying on your bed.
"Now, come on," she sniffed, holding it up for you. "We will find you the best first date outfit amongst this mess."
She did. Just in time for Nat to fix your makeup and for Sadie to snap a few photos of you with her Polaroid. And right at 11, you opened the door to a bouquet blocking Jake’s face. 
“You got me flowers?” you said, greeting him with a smile when he lowered them to reveal his face. Jake carefully placed them into your outstretched hand, grinning when you immediately brought them to your face to smell them. 
“I’m sorry they're not tulips.” 
You shook your head, smiling into the bouquet. “It doesn’t matter what they are. Thank you, Jake.” 
And then, in something that made you smile, he pulled out a single flower wrapped in a bow from his back pocket. “I figured I should keep with tradition.”
You stepped forward, hand pressing to Jake's shoulder as you pressed your lips to his. Letting Jake deepen the kiss, he wrapped his arms around your waist, mindful of the flowers in the crook of your arm. But you pulled back when you felt his hands sliding down your back towards your ass. 
“We have eyes and ears on us from the living room,” you warned him, jerking your head towards your hallway. Not that Penny or Nat would let Sadie see anything untoward from their hiding spot behind the wall. But you could do without the teasing from them afterwards.
Jake grinned, leaning over to call out, "Bug!"
Turning to face your hallway, you spied Sadie stumbling out from behind the wall like she had been pushed. She huffed at someone, probably at Nat, then comically straightened her shirt before making her way to the door.
"Hi, Uncle Jake," she greeted him, though her voice lacked the usual cheeriness it always had. Jake let you go to kneel in front of her, holding out the flower. "Miss Sadie, will you accept this flower so I can spend the day with your aunt?"
Sadie's face remained stoic as she reached out to take the flower from his hand, bringing it up to her face as she twirled it once. Jake stood up, slightly worried about her non-reaction. But you knew exactly what she was doing, and Jake was falling for it hook, line and sinker.
In Sadie fashion, she finally grinned at him, holding her free hand up to her forehead in a salute, cheekily saying, "Have her home by no later than 11!"
You laughed when Jake saluted her back. Sadie, content with the reaction, ran back inside to find Penny so they could put her flower in some water.
"Was I just given a curfew by a ten-year-old?"
"Yup."
---
The benefit of getting to the fairgrounds a little bit earlier, you didn’t have to wait in line for rides. And boy, were you surprised when Jake dragged you around to a bunch of them. Teacups, bumper cars,  going down those super long slides in a potato sack more than once, you plastered up against his chest. If the two of you could go on it, Jake ensured you did.
A part of you was slightly pleased he wanted to. It helped with the slight nervousness in your stomach, both from this morning and from being with Jake in this context. You had to remind yourself time and time again that Jake was the same as he had always been. But it became easier with each ride, the two of you laughing way harder than you should for a Saturday morning. 
It took your stomach rumbling loudly enough for Jake to kiss your cheek and drag you to the food stands. After asking what you wanted, he told you to find a seat, saying there was no possible way you were paying for yourself. You had huffed at him, but he only pecked your forehead before gently turning you by your shoulders and sending you on your way.
You found a picnic bench away from the stands under a tree. It was the perfect spot, away from other seats, for you and Jake to talk. He found you easily enough, handing you your corn on the cob on a paper plate before placing his hot dog down on the table and climbing over the bench to sit next to you.
But it occurred to you, as you started to nibble on the cob, you didn’t really know that much about him. Sure, you knew he was a fighter pilot, from Texas, from a big family with troubling dynamics. He grew up on a ranch. He was a few years older than you. He had a reputation. 
But you didn’t know the other important stuff. 
“What’s your favourite colour?” you asked, breaking the silence. 
“What?” 
“What’s your favourite colour?” you said again, laughing. 
He shot you a look. “We’re really doing this?” 
“You're the one that wanted to take me out on a date,” you shrugged, taking another bite of your cob. “So spill. What’s your favourite colour?” 
“Orange.”  He admitted after a second. "You?"
“Blue-Green. But not turquoise,” you were quick to correct. “The blue-green you see out in the sea.”
Jake nodded thoughtfully but didn’t say anything.
“This is the part where you ask me a different question,” you roughly whispered, leaning over to tease him.
Jake chuckled, making a show of needing to think about his question before finally asking, “Most embarrassing moment?” 
You giggled at the memory. “When Sadie was born. I was rushing to leave the hospital cause I was late for my shift. The nurse told me I could use the stairwells, but I triggered the emergency exit fire alarm on the door instead.” 
Jake snickered with a mouthful of his hot dog. 
“Hey, they tell you you can use those doors. I was misinformed.” 
Jake shook his head fondly. "Okay, your turn."
“Did you always want to be in the Navy? Flying planes?” you asked, sobering the conversation. Jake looked at you for a minute before staring down at his plate. “Remember how I said my future was more or less planned out?”
You nodded, taking another bite of your corn on the cob, listening as he continued. “My grandfather served in the Navy. He saw how much I didn’t want to follow in my brother’s footsteps and started talking to me about his deployments.” 
Jake grabbed a napkin off the table, wiping away a speck of mustard from the corner of his mouth before explaining, "My dad had been pressuring me throughout college to come home and take over the ranch since I put my foot down about football. I spent a summer with my grandfather up at a Navy base in Fort Worth, learning, watching, and taking everything in. I got to see a little bit of everything, but the fighter squadron... there was something freeing in seeing them up there."
You could tell he was lost in his head, reminiscing about a time when he was trying to figure out what he wanted to do with his life, away from people's impressions and opinions. If you ever met Jake's dad, you'd make sure he knew what you thought about the treatment of his youngest son.
"Then he asked if I wanted to join when I graduated," He shrugged. “One of the best decisions I’ve ever made. He passed five years ago.” 
Listening to Jake recount his story made your heart ache, knowing he would have been expected to live out a future somebody else had carved for him had somebody not shown him a different way. Though it brought comfort to know Jake had somebody in his corner, two people looking out for him if you considered his sister. You reached out, letting your hand graze up and down his forearm in comfort. 
“He was looking out for you,” you offered kindly.
“He would have liked you,” he wondered aloud. “And he would have spoiled Sadie to no end.”
You let the silence stretch on, knowing Jake would need a few seconds to regain his composure. But then he suddenly said aloud, “You said Ridley sent your college admissions for you. What did you study?” 
You swallowed hard at the mention of Ridley, a queasiness settling in your stomach as this morning was still too fresh on your mind.
“English,” you managed to say. “The bookcase in my family room wasn’t a dead giveaway?”
“Anyone can be a bookworm,” he remarked, the look on his face indicating he expected you to continue.
“I wrote a lot in high school,” you shrugged. “Fiction, poetry… short stories. Ridley found them one day after we moved, submitting a couple to a few English and creative writing programs.”
Jake took another bite of his food before asking, “You’re a writer?”
You nodded. “Trying to be.”
“Anything I can read?” He asked playfully, knocking your shoulder. You smirked, pushing back into him as you said, “Maybe one day.”
You didn’t know if asking something like this on a date you thought was going well was proper. But you were curious anyway when you casually said, “Your first kiss?” 
But Jake wasn’t ashamed to answer, not that you expected him to be. The man oozed confidence. “Highschool. After my first touchdown. One of the cheerleaders at the side bench. The worst experience of my life.” 
“I knew you were a jock,” you snorted. 
“What about you?”
“I was a geek - in the library most weekends.” 
“No, your first kiss.” 
“Oh… um..” you hesitated before finally admitting, “You.”
You may as well have sucker-punched him in the gut. Jake turned to face you,  shock then confusion covering his face, as if you didn’t just admit to him the kiss at three AM in your hallway was the first time you’d ever been kissed.
His reaction made you look down into your lap, blending the edge of your paper plate back and forth, before giving into the urge to fill the silence. “I’ve gone on dates. But they never went past the first one. Either things didn’t work out, or I got ghosted. It made me wonder what I was doing wrong.”
Jake cleared his throat. “So you’ve never…?”
He didn’t need to finish his sentence for you to know what he was asking. You shook your head, your blush spreading down your neck. “Does that surprise you?” 
“Someone like you, how didn’t anyone..?” 
“I’ve never trusted someone enough to do it with,” you shrugged. You felt embarrassed, not that you should have been. But it was a well know fact Jake got around. That he was, for lack of a better word, experienced. 
It wasn’t like the opportunity didn’t present itself while you were at college. But the parties and causal thing just wasn’t for you. And all the guys seemed like walking red flags. Your insecurities also didn’t help. But they weren’t as bad back then as they are now. And then Sadie came along, and you put any thought of dating aside. 
“Does that bother you?” you asked meekly, scared of his answer. 
Jake turned, his knee knocking yours as he dropped his plate to the bench, wiping his hand on his shorts before reaching out to stroke the outside of your thigh. His voice was firm when he answered, “Absolutely not. I’m just surprised.” 
You didn’t know you had been holding your breath when you found yourself letting out a sigh of relief. 
“Though I can’t lie, I’m thinking about all the ways I can corrupt your innocent little soul.”
You smirked, shaking your head. "You're a menace."
He returns your grin, unfazed by your response. “Now, what else did you want to ask me? Since we are doing the question thing.”
You thought about it for a second before asking, “What were you going to tell me on New Year’s Eve?” 
But rather than freeze up like he did the other times you asked, Jake smiled fondly at you, hand still stroking the outside of your leg. “What? Me giving you the best first kiss of your life in your hallway at three AM wasn’t enough? Clearly, I didn’t do my job right. ” 
You opened your mouth to respond, but Jake leaned forward, pressing a quick kiss to your lips before leaning back. “I was going to ask if you wanted to start the year off by going on a date with me.” 
You gulped. “You’ve been thinking about this awhile then?” 
“Since Sadie invited me on the hike.” 
The uneasiness in your stomach disappeared with the mention of Sadie, and you squeezed his wrist in silent thanks before reaching for your food. But then Jake said something that made you pause.
“I think she’s trying to play matchmaker with her subtle hints and pictures…” He froze, realizing what he just said out loud. You dropped the cob from your mouth, looking over at him in shock. 
“She didn’t!” You exclaimed, catching on to what he didn’t say. “Oh, that insect! I knew she sent you something suspicious with those photos!” 
“Hey, I promised her I wouldn’t say anything,” he said, sounding guilty for breaking his promise. Then your mind flashed back to the video chat you had with Jake. “Wait, Coyote… at the end of our call..” 
Jake closed his eyes, tilting his head back to the sky as you exclaimed, “Was I the photo in your cockpit?!”
___
Jake told you he wanted to take this slow. 
You had agreed to the both of you taking it slow. 
Hell, it was your first date. 
But damn, he was not making it easy.
After lunch, Jake wanted to take you to the arcade on the other side of the fairgrounds before the two of you had dinner. Buying a bag full of coins, he placed them in the palm of your hand, telling you to pick whatever you wanted. But you wouldn't have that, telling him the two of you would take turns deciding what to play.
But no matter what game the two of you decided on, you were sure he was purposely trying to mess you up by making himself as distractingly attractive as possible.
It all started with the air hockey table. A few occasional glances here or there as you knocked the puck back and forth along the table. Then it was the flirty trash talk, a playful diss being said when one of you would score against the other, leading you to shout out, "Bite me, Hangman."
But he smirked and cockily replied, "I have."
The blush that came next could have rivalled Rooster's angry face.
Next came the basketball hoops. Jake went first, and despite you standing in his line of sight, leaning up against the machine to the side, Jake didn't break his focus as he made every shot. You knew it was a failed attempt from the start anyway, given how focused he would have to be flying an F-18.
Unfortunately, you didn't have much luck when it came to your turn. He came up behind you, his hands on your hips, pressing kisses to your cheek and neck, hoping it would distract you enough to miss your shots and allow him to win the game, which he did.
And out of all things, they had axe throwing. If this man could throw a dart with that much accuracy, he had no trouble with the axes. Watching him toss the axe from over his head, muscles bulging, the look of concentration on his face.
The next time you needed firewood for the pit in the backyard, you would ask Jake for some help splitting it, maybe on a hot day.
It got so bad you had to pull him back by his hand, holding on to yours, right in the middle of the crowd as he was leading you to another game, only to grab him by the back of his neck and lay one on him.
But what really got you was when it came time to redeem the tickets, Jake asked if the two of you could pick something out for Sadie - the Navy-themed teddy bear was looped tightly around the straps of your bag as the two of you walked to one of the pop-up restaurants the fair was hosting. 
Jake went to find a table as you went to find the bathroom. You stared at yourself in the mirror, realizing your worries this morning and even your vocalizations to Jake in your hallway had been for nothing. 
Deep down, you knew Ridley would tell you to stop being so anxious about this and go for it. Jake had already proved, each and every time, he was nothing like the guys that ghosted you or the guys you encountered at school—more than the cocky aviator type you painted him for looking for a good time. Even your lack of experience didn’t phase him and you being the photo in his cockpit? Where did that come from? 
And it suddenly struck you that you were doing the same thing you had ratted the squad out for, what his father had been doing to him. Jake was more than what others painted him for. Sadie had realized it long before anyone else did. Before you did. And it took her inviting Jake to a Saturday night and on the hike for you to realize. 
Who cares about what he did before he met you? Or what everyone believed he should be doing. He was here, with you, and wanted to be in Sadie’s life. 
You were done worrying about what-ifs. Come what may, you thought. You trusted Jake, and you wanted to be with him. In telling yourself that, you realized it was time you allowed yourself to believe in what you refused to admit. 
There was nothing wrong with being in love with Jake Seresin. 
Walking back, you searched the crowd for Jake, finding him seated at a table, speaking with a waitress. You stepped forward, but out of the blue, somebody checked your shoulder, making you stumble forward. Catching yourself on a nearby empty table, you turned around, angrily calling out, “Watch where your going, Asshole!” 
There was a man in a white sweater with his hood up. He didn’t turn around at your voice. Instead, he continued walking down towards the way you had come. You scoffed, adjusting your bag hanging off your shoulder before going to find Jake. 
“And here I thought you might have escaped through the window.” He joked, watching as you approached. The waitress was gone, and in his hands were two menus. 
“As if I’d leave you now,” you scoffed, placing a hand on his shoulder to balance yourself as you climbed into the seat next to him. Once you were settled, you hooked your arm through his, resting your head on his shoulder. 
“What?” you could hear the smile in his voice as he asked, holding out one of the menus to you. But you could only shake your head, smiling fondly into his sleeve as you grabbed the menu from him. “Nothing. I’m just having a good time.”
After ordering and while waiting for the food, you learned Jake was a natural-born storyteller. The minute you asked him about what life was like growing up on a ranch, he launched into multiple stories of shenanigans he and Janet got into, one story in particular almost making you fall out of your chair laughing - Jake telling you he got drunk on a bottle of Rye in high school and ended up walking home, only for his family to have found him passed out in a hay bale in the field the next morning. Or the barn dog everyone hated, a grumpy thing whose bite was worse than its bark. 
"And right there, under all those blankets and saddle pads, was the damn Jack Russell, snapping away and chasing us outta the barn at our heels."
Laughing into your glass of wine, you relayed your own story about how Sadie came about her nickname, bringing ladybugs in from the backyard an empty water bottle and how she forgot to screw the top on. Jake fell into your side, laughing when you explained you couldn’t stop finding ladybugs for weeks afterwards. 
The conversation continued throughout dinner, Jake learning you broke your wrist skating when you were 15. You learned exactly what his father had planned for him until his grandfather stepped, only furthering your dislike for the man. While you already knew both of you had the same taste in music, you weren’t surprised Jake had a soft spot for country music.
And when your meal was finished, Jake led you out of the makeshift tent; his arm lopped through yours as you snuggled happily up against his side. When you moved towards the parking lot, Jake tugged on your hand, pulling you back into his chest, saying, “I have one more thing planned.”
Yet, when he dragged you over to the line for the Ferris wheel, you felt like you were going to throw up. And you tried, you really did, not to let on that you were terrified to go up in the air. This date was going wonderfully, and you didn’t want to ruin it with something so trivial as this.
So you waited in line with him, listening to him continue the conversation about how he realized he wasn’t meant for football like his brother, even though he loved to watch. But every time the machine stopped and the seats, carts, or cars, whatever they were called, swung with the momentum, you had to force yourself not to jolt.
When your turn came in the line, you tried not to grip Jake’s hand tighter than you should when he helped you into your seat. To loosen your shoulders from being too tight and slouch your back when it was too straight. And when it started to move, you shot your hands out wide, one going for the bar in front of Jake, the other to your side of the cart.
When it stopped, you swallowed hard. Jake looked at you, amused, before finally stating, “You’re afraid of heights.” 
“Not really…” you said, looking over the side, wondering how quickly the maintenance crew put up the blasted thing and if they had any missing blots or screws afterwards. 
“Come now, you can tell me,” he leaned forward, placing his hand on your wrist of the hand gripping the handlebar. He pressed his nose against your ear, his voice buzzing as he said lowly, “I won’t judge.” 
Something metal creaked beneath you, making you jolt, your hand now covering your heart. “It’s not really heights.” 
“No?” he murmured lowly. You knew what he was doing, the cocky fucker. No amount of distraction or persuasion would get your mind off the empty space below you. Or get you to admit something you knew he would most definitely take some sort of defence to. 
Or worse, try and fix it. Which he was capable of doing. 
Jake suddenly rocked back in the seat back, hard. You squealed, plastering yourself into his side, gripping his body tight as you exclaimed, “Flying! I have a fear of flying!”
His hand slid down from over the back seat, finding your hip bone and gripping it tight, tugging you closer. “Now, was that so bad?” 
Hiding your face into his shoulder, you replied, “Yes, especially after what you told me. And you're a pilot.” 
“A pilot who could help you get over this fear.” 
You shook your head against his chest. “Nope. I’m not stepping foot in that thing.”
“You wound me, darling,” he said, exasperated. “Truly.”
“It’s not that I’m against it,” you replied, adjusting yourself against his side, Jake’s hands making sure there wasn’t an inch between the two of you.
“Mav’s offered countless times when he takes Sadie up … I don’t know,” you finished lamely. “I just can’t stand the thought of no ground beneath my feet.”
"I bet I could change your mind."
“Not going to happen,” you challenged back. 
“Nope, I guarantee you, I will get you into a plane."
You laughed hoarsely at his words. “Jake…” 
“You and me, our next date. I’m calling it.” 
“Maybe I’ll sit in it. But that’s it.” 
“Nope. If you’re dating a pilot, you must take advantage of that.”
“What about you?” you asked, hoping to get him off-topic. “What are you afraid of?”
But Jake’s laughter died down, his eyes unfocused stared off into the distance. It wasn’t that he didn’t know - The same fear had followed him since high school, on deployments and in the quiet hours when nobody else was around. If he said it out loud, it would, without a doubt, give it power. 
And if it had power, it would ruin his chances with you.
You gave him a few minutes, figuring he needed time to think about it. “Is it a hard one?
“Look,” he jutted his head forward. You sat up, turning your head to look out over the field, expecting to find something weird. But you didn’t need to search the crowd or look through the stands. It was obvious what Jake was pointing out to you. 
“Whoa.”
Even if it freaked you out, Jake timed the Ferris Wheel perfectly. The sunset was gorgeous, with streaks of soft pastel yellows, pinks, and even hints of purple. The blue was even gentler than the bright hue of the everyday sky. 
“It’s so….” you started, but couldn’t finish. You were too in awe of the sight in front of you. 
“Beautiful,” he finished for you. It certainly is, you thought. But when you glanced over at him, you caught his eyes on you.
“You’re not watching the sunset, are you?” 
“Nope.”
You blushed, deciding to press your cheek back into his chest and gazing at the sky. You could get used to this, you thought, as Jake grabbed the junction of your knee, pulling your legs over his. 
With the movement or sounds of creaking metal no longer bothering you, you felt content to snuggle into Jake’s side as the Ferris Wheel swung you both forward again. 
He pressed his lips to your forehead, murmuring, “I’m still getting you on a plane.” 
“Jake…” 
___
The sun had set when Jake and you got off the Ferris wheel. He led you back to his truck with an arm around your waist, content to press the occasional kiss into your hair as the pair of you navigated the crowds.
Jake guided you to the passenger side when you reached the truck. The both of you were hidden out of view from any on-lookers who were heading home. You pressed yourself up against the side as he reached for the handle, ever the gentleman, to open the door and help you up into your seat. But as he turned his head to look at you, you held your head up to look at him with a shy smile. 
That shy smile, and the way the light hit the corners of your eyes, had him sucking in a sharp breath. His hand lost its grip, sliding along the side of the truck as he slowly stepped toward you. Watching as he approached you with a heated gaze, you timidly bit the bottom of your lip.
You couldn't see the stars behind his head, nor the lights from the fairgrounds or the warm glow of the string lights making up the parking lot. You could only see him towering over you, his arm stretching out to rest above your head, cocooning between him and the truck. His other hand landed on your cheek, his thumb softly stroking the skin, then gently releasing your lip from its hold before replacing it with his lips.
Moaning against his mouth, you slid your hand up his chest. It was a slow kiss, Jake's tongue tracing the inside of your mouth as if the two of you had all the time in the world.
Jake's hand slithered down your side, finding a grip on your leg. The heel of your boot caught on the step of the truck at his touch, allowing Jake the space he needed to situate himself between your legs, pinning you up against the frame. He nibbed at your neck, teeth working on marking up the opposite side of his handiwork from the hallway. There were bruises, much to your pleasure or displeasure, and you had spent at least half an hour each morning since covering it up. And Jake clearly wanted to add more to it.
But it didn’t stop you from attempting to return the favour, as your mouth managed to land on Jake’s cheek, working down towards his jawline as he tilted his head back. You felt the small spikes of a five o’clock shadow under your soft lips, pressing kisses to his skin. Then in a tiny spark of confidence, you closed them around a patch of skin.
“Fuck Liz,” he growled out, hand tightening on your thigh. “We need to go slow. What happened to not putting out on the first date?”
You let his neck go with a sharp intake of breath. "This is slow."
"Slow is driving you home, walking you to your front door," rasped after a kiss, diving back for another one before adding, "Kissing you goodnight and asking when I can see you again."
“Then why were you teasing me all day?” you gasped out. “I’m just following your lead.”
Jake pulled sharply back, the hand above your head thumping hard on the metal. “I’m not taking you up against my truck in the middle of a dirt parking lot for your first time.”
"Stereotypes are overrated."
Jake growled. You were driving him crazy, testing his resolve, especially after what you admitted to him earlier. It only confirmed he needed to take this slow with you.
Then again, another part of him was elated that he'd be the only one to have ever touched you like this, to feel you like this. That the sounds rising from your body were only because of him.
After securely wrapping your leg around his waist, Jake went for the center of your blouse, fingers single-handly making quick work of the small buttons.
"You would, wouldn't you?"  He groaned, fingers searching underneath the helm for the top of your bra before giving a sharp tug down, exposing your nipple to the air. You gasped at the action, the night air caressing your skin. 
"Let me do this to you out in the middle of nowhere," he murmured against your skin in between kisses, working inch by inch down to your breast.  "Where anyone could walk by."
In three seconds, Jake had your entire breast in his mouth, jaw tense as he sucked hard, his tongue toying with your nipple. You mewled, not used to the sensation.
"Fuck Jake," you whimpered, your head hitting the door as you looked up to the stars, blindly raking your fingers through his hair. 
He let it go with a pop. "Pay attention, darlin'. My eyes are down here."
Dropping your chin to your chest, you got a close-up view of Jake staring up at you, lips enclosing around the peak of your breast to work the bud between his teeth lightly. A wail caught in your throat at a particular tug, eyes still focused on his face as you attempted to bring him closer to your chest.
He pulled back, voice husky as he said, "Good girl."
You heaved at the praise, a flush of heat shooting down your body. You started to rock your hips against his, desperate for pressure, friction, anything to soothe the burning sensation in your core. Your jeans prevented you from feeling anything as Jake continued to suck around your nipple.
"Or you'd let me do this."
You moaned, a long yearning sound echoing between the space of the two parking spots when Jake slipped his hand down between your bodies and cupped your core, his thumb pressing on your clit through the seam of your jeans.
"Or this," he chuckled when you bucked your hips off the side of the truck, you seeing more than the stars littering the sky as he rubbed at you with the pad of his thumb. But his hand was gone as quickly as he touched you, leaving you aching and whining for more.
Jake could only think about how beautiful you looked, panting hard and skin flushed, just as affected as he was.  He was in awe of you, of how well today went, how you care about him and refuse to believe in how everyone else sees him. He may have needed to assure you you were worth the risk of a broken heart, but he was grateful you were willing to take the chance on him. 
But then you fucking sidelined him; your voice was quiet and raspy as you said, “I trust you.” 
It was three simple words. And you probably didn’t understand their weight in your frenzied state. Or maybe you did. You told him you didn’t trust many people with this part of you. Perhaps you were telling him he was that person. 
Either way, they meant everything to him.
“I want to do this right by you,” he gritted out through his teeth. “But you are making it hard.”
You didn't mean to, but your snicker escaped before it was too late, causing a series of giggles to wrack your chest.
Jake instantly caught on to what you were laughing about, the heat building between you both starting to die down as he softly laughed with you, body shaking as he pressed his forehead into the center of your chest.
"Liz, don't you dare."
But you couldn't help yourself. "Pun intended?"
He went for your sides, fingers poking and scratching at your stomach as you let out a screech, failing to escape his wrath before you finally called out for mercy. Pulling your bra and blouse back over your breast, Jake sighed affectionally, pressing his forehead to yours. "Where have you been all my life, darlin'?"
You didn't know what to say, so you pressed your lips to his, content to simply be in the moment, even if the two of you looked like horny teenagers at a school fair.
Thank god nobody could see the two of you like this right now.
But you were seen. 
From the driver’s seat of a little white car with a spoiler on the back, parked three cars down on the opposite side of the lane. It’s passenger watching you and that man, doing whatever the fuck that was, up against that specimen of a truck.
He could hear your laughter from this distance, watching as the man picked you up, you clinging to him all arms and legs as he opened the door and set you inside, closing it before jogging around to the other side. 
Watching the truck drive away, he couldn't help but feel some sort of pleasure in the fact he would see you soon. At the place where you were the most vulnerable. When none of those glorified uniform-wearing servants would be able to stop him.
Yes, he would see you soon.
And he wouldn’t leave this godforsaken state without what he came for. 
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Shit hits the fan from here on out... 👀
Tags:
@blue-aconite @tinytotontheoversizedpony @djs8891 @caitsymichelle13 @startrekfangirl2233
@mayhemmanaged @ereardon @dempy @shanimallina87 @teacupsandtopgun @daggerspare-standingby
@phantomxoxo @formulapierre @eli2447 @fulla02 @blckgrl-sunflower @mizzzpink @ohgodnotagainn
@bubblegumbeautyqueen @sarahsmi13s @desert-fern @lynnestra44 @memoriesat30 @penwieldingdreamer @mxlanciia
@bradleybeachbabe @bobby-r2d2-floyd @lavenderbradshaw @roosters-girl @lovinglyeternal @genius2050
@brooke-stinson
Part 11: Dream On Coming Soon
Wickett ;)
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violet27writes · 1 month ago
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Whumptober Day 6: Panic Room -Twilight
Part 1 (Legend), Part 2 (Here), Part 3 (Warriors), of (10), Ao3 link
- Twilight-
Twilight wasn’t sure what was happening anymore. One moment, he was charging at the Dark, the next, he was on the ground surrounded by familiar woods. Alone.
His home wouldn’t be too far. The village that raised him when he’d had no home.
The shift-portal left him momentarily disoriented, as always, but even then he’d known something was off. It was too quiet. The birds that usually littered the trees had lost their song. The leaves lay still on their branches. The animals were hidden far from both sight and sound. The earth under him stood still. His forest seemed to be holding its breath. He tried focusing on something. 
Anything. 
Even with his advanced hearing, there was nothing. It was like he’d gone deaf. There wasn’t much to see, either, as it must’ve been just before dawn, with the sky still holding onto the darkest of nights. It was interesting how their different eras seem to hold different day-night cycles as well as constellations. Either way, he would leave that for the scholar and adjacent-scientist to sort out.
Slowly, he pushed himself onto his feet, wincing with every leaf that crunched and every article of clothing that swished. His heart pounded in his ears.
Exactly how far were the others? Were any of the rest of them together? Or were they all alone like him?
Twilight wasn’t sure how to act. Making any more unnecessary sounds would be painting a target on his back. There was undoubtedly an enemy in the area, the only question was who? And what was their purpose?
However, the others would also be here somewhere, in an unfamiliar place. They would know something was up, as they had plenty of wits about them. Some might even be more prepared than Twilight to deal with this threat.
Unfortunately, Twilight’s decision was made for him as the silence broke with a heart-wrenching scream.
Rusl.
Twilight ran. Ran. Ran. Consequences be damned.
His father screamed again, prompting him to somehow quicken his pace. Roots tripped him up. Branches snagged on his clothes, scrapping on his face. 
Run run run.
He found the well-worn path that would lead him through the village and continued on it, the cobblestones crying out as his boots fell on it. Home was right there, just past these trees-
Blood. The wave of it hit his senses harder than a ramming goat. Fresh. Human.
Next was the smell of fire, of smoke, burning more than just wood. More than a harmless campfire, bigger than one had any right to be. He could see it now, too, burning bright between the branches of the spruce and birch. When the trees finally fell away, Twilight slowed his pace to a stop, simply staring at what used to be his home. 
Someone had torn down Ordon.
The town hall was hardly anything more than ashes. The remnants of its planks were black and the fire that had destroyed it was still stubbornly holding onto its life. The buildings surrounding it were in various states of ruin. The shop’s roof was gone, the mayor’s house was frame and bones, the flames on Fado’s ranch were still lively, consuming anything it touched. Twilight didn’t want to avert his gaze. Not toward the houses. 
But, he did.
The houses hadn’t been spared the fire. Even more of them were in the earlier stages of destruction, some still with the thatched roofs holding on to the walls. Rusl and Uli’s was the worst of the lot, not looking dissimilar to the town hall.
Rays of sun began to peek from the horizon, revealing even more to him.
Cloaked figures stood all around the houses and buildings, tall, dark and armed. Around them were the villagers. They lay still and unmoving.
“Link!”
Twilight’s head shot toward the sound. Rusl. He didn’t have time to realize his body was moving again. It wouldn’t have mattered.
His father lay on his back, his shirt drenched in crimson, his gaze wide and scared. The figure standing over him drove a spear into his chest. The light left his eyes in an instant. His outstretched hand fell short. The other lay in Uli’s, who was at his side, eyes glazed over.
Twilight didn’t hesitate after that. Still charging forward, he pulled his sword from his scabbard and lifted it over his head with a battle cry. Whoever had done this was going to die tonight.
The scream alerted the figure, who spun around and then lifted their hand in a feeble attempt at self-defense. Twilight swung. The sword hit their hand- And bounced right off, the force of their magic throwing him back. His sword flew out of his hand from the strength of it as Twilight hit the ground with a crash.
He wheezed as the breath left his air and tried to find where his weapon had landed.
The figure in front of him lowered their hand, tilting their head to the side thoughtfully. They were covered in blood, from their arms, to the blue embroidery on the hems of their tunic, simply reeking of it. But another scent lay below that. Below the smell of ash and smoke. Now from his angle, as well as the scant sunlight, Twilight saw all he needed to see. And the figure knew that too.
Midna lowered her hood, cold eyes piercing into him as she simply stared into him. The Twili began to gather around her, their hoods still up, their faces hidden.
“Don’t worry,” She started, her alien tone sickeningly sweet without the lacing of sarcasm. Her lips pressed together with a smirk, “It’s not my blood.”
Twilight screamed at her, jumping onto his feet. Tears streamed down his face, hot and angry. He had every intention of killing her where she stood. Only, another blast of magic from one of the Twili knocked him back onto the ground.
Again he stood, tearing up the earth beneath him as he charged again with a snarl, before he found himself yet again brought down.
The streams of sunshine bloomed on the horizon, turning the little beams into light akin to fireworks and brightening the sky.
Midna watched, eyes sharp. Gaze cold. “You know, it really is a shame that the daylight can be so violent.”
Then they were gone in the blink of an eye.
And Twilight could do nothing but scream.
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hannibalzero · 8 months ago
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Arrowheads and second chances
Charthur chapter 7 teaser 🦌🦬🦌🦬
It had almost been a week.
No one had tired to kill Charles.
If anything, the family of the Sliver dagger ranch was..
welcoming.
Charles had a room to himself in the bunk house, if anyone needed him when he was resting? People knocked. Respected Charles space, allowed him to use the same latrine and wash clothing. invited Charles to meals and even schooling?
Hosea Matthew’s gave Charles a slate and chalk to practice his writing and arithmetic.
He could read some, knew the basics of arithmetic thanks to his Uncle, but actually honing the teachings was a rare treat.
Charles could remember his own mother encouraging him to learn and practice what he learned. If she taught him how to tie a knot, they would redo the knot again and again until it was just as good as hers.
Maybe that’s why he had such a gift with patience?
But this still could be a trap. Suckering Charles in with such kindness? He wouldn’t let down his guard just yet.
Then there was Arthur Morgan.
strangest omega Charles had ever seen.
There was no such thing as gendered work, for Arthur Morgan there was just work. He broke horses with Charles, John and Kieran. chopped wood, bailed hay, leveled ground for a rabbit pen (supposedly). Did laundry with Bessie and Tilly, made pies and bread.
It amazed Charles how damn strong Arthur was!
Arthur had come back from hunting with a big horned ram draped across his shoulders like some fine lady wearing a fur. Like it didn’t weigh anything! Not only that but the kill of the animal was downright beautiful.
One single arrow right between the eyes. No pain, the animal is given respect for its gifts.
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gravediggerclub · 1 year ago
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i dunno how to make an opener for something like this so ill just start
tagged by: @nijigay :3c thank u
relationship status: i need her so bad she knows who she is
Favorite color: pink all the way but DAMN if orange aint good as hell
Stuck in my head: a cover of hikaru utada's "sanctuary" by iRis.EXE
Last song listened to: unfortunately it was ram ranch when i got tagged
3 favorite foods: hashbrowns, pho and white chocolate chip brownies (subject to change)
Last thing I googled: what are the benefits of ring fit adventure (if anyone knows please tell me im looking to make horrible financial decisions)
Dream trip: go to LA either rn or next year for AX, or go to arizona this october and watch the fnaf movie on opening night with my friend . maybe a big japan trip with aforementioned friend someday
Anything I want right now: i would love either a lot of money instantly or a job or Her or a really big bowl of ramen
tagging: nobody because im shy! sorry for killing your chain
 drasfdgfnbmf ty for tagging me im too shy to really tag anyone but i love tag games sm
tagged by: @illypad​ thank uuuuu !
relationship status: my parasocial heart belongs to yoppi
Favourite colour: black but i like blue and red as accent colors
Stuck in my head: the friends opening because an omori parody of it showed up on my feed yesterday
Last song listened to: “when it falls” from rwby
3 favourite foods: baked eel, enchiladas, and macarons
Last thing I googled: google history but ig that doesnt count. fnaf 4 release date bc i was shocked to find that fnaf 4 came out within a year of the first fnaf like thats nuts
Dream trip: i want to visit my grandparents again in hachioji
Anything I want right now: a cure to adhd. and a black rock shooter cosplay
tagging: i get yelled at every time i tag people so im tagging like 2 people who hopefully wont yell at me @gravediggerclub​ @driscariot​
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wayward-dreamer · 3 years ago
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Life’s Lessons - Good Enough
Pairing: Mechanic!Dean x Female!Teacher!Reader
Word count: 6,372
Summary: Y/N and Dean are planning their wedding, but a reminder from the past gives him doubts about his relationship and whether he’ll ever actually be good enough for her.
Warnings: Swearing, Dean’s past with Lisa comes back to haunt him, ANGST, Tears, Dean’s self deprecation rears its ugly head, Making up, Fluff.
Music: Love Of My Life - Queen (Dean bar scene)
Life’s Lessons Spotify Playlist
A/N: The next time stamp is here! Stay tuned for another announcement soon about the saga! Hope you all like the time stamp! As always, happy reading and enjoy! :)
Life’s Lessons Saga Masterlist
Divider by @firefly-graphics​​​.
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Y/N pressed the ‘end’ button on her phone, throwing it beside her on the couch with a loud groan of frustration.
Looking down at the coffee table in front of her, she shook her head at the sudden overwhelming feeling. The whole surface of the table was covered in bridal magazines, brochures, printouts of venues, her laptop with multiple tabs open, and everything else that came with planning a wedding. She kept hitting brick walls with every place she was looking at being unavailable for the date that she and Dean had decided on. The only thing she had managed to do was finalize the guest list, which was at 80 people. It wasn’t a big number, but knowing she would have to do the invitations as soon as a venue was decided, it was a lot of people. Luckily, it was everyone she or Dean cared about, without having to make sacrifices for their special day.
Y/N heard the key in the door and Dean’s boots on the wooden floors as he walked through the house. He smiled when he saw her, walking over quickly and leaning down, kissing her softly.
“Hey, sweetheart,” he muttered against her lips, kissing her again.
“Hey,” she sighed, a relief washing over her now that he was home. “How was work?”
He huffed out a breath as he leaned back against the couch. “Busy. Having the new guy on today didn’t help. I felt like how you must feel with the kids in class, keeping an eye on him most of the time.”
“He’ll get better soon enough, don’t worry,” she reassured him, leaning over and kissing his cheek.
Dean glanced over the coffee table, leaning forward and resting his forearms on his knees. “That looks like a lot. You okay? Anything I can help with? Not that I know a damn thing about weddings.”
He smirked with a small laugh, kissing her cheek. Y/N smiled and shook her head, looking down at the table and sighing heavily.
“I keep hitting dead ends with venues, that’s all,” she stated, shrugging.
“Hey.” Getting her attention, he cupped her face in his hands and looked into her eyes. “Everything’s gonna work out. We’ll find something and it’s going to be amazing. I know it.”
She nodded, even though she didn’t really feel better despite his comforting words. “I guess I’m just worried about a lot of this.”
“You know whatever you need from me, I’m here, right? Say the word and I’ll do it,” he told her, his hands leaving her face and taking hers.
“I know,” she whispered, smiling softly at him.
“Don’t worry about anything, sweetheart,” he said, smiling at her. “We got this, okay?”
“I know, I just…” she stopped herself, unsure of how to express herself.
“Something’s wrong,” Dean frowned, sensing something wasn’t right. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing,” she reassured him, smiling softly. “But… I just need to know you want all of this. I know you keep saying you want me to have the wedding I want, but I want us both to have that, Dean. I want what you want too.”
“Don’t go thinking I don’t want all of this. I wanna do this for you. For us.” he said, smiling reassuringly. “I do. I promise you, I do, sweetheart.”
“Okay.” She nodded, her worried expression morphing into a soft smile.
“Okay, good. Now, take a break from all this stuff and let’s make dinner. Sound good?” he asked, smirking.
“Yeah,” she replied, smiling wide as she leaned in and kissed him.
As they got up from the couch and walked into the kitchen to start cooking, Y/N breathed a sigh of relief, as she felt a pressure lift off her. Dean always had a way of doing that. It was incredibly cute to see Dean so excited, even if he didn’t understand what she was saying when she mentioned something to do with the wedding, but he secretly loved getting involved.
They couldn’t wait to get to the big day and start the next part of their journey together.
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The doorbell rang, alerting Y/N that her guests for the evening had arrived. It was a Saturday, and unfortunately Dean had to go into work because of some problem with one of the cars, so Y/N was left to do more of the wedding planning herself. Dean felt guilty as he left, but she had assured him that it was more than okay.
She walked to the door and opened it, smiling wide as she saw Mary and John on the other side. They all hugged each other, before Y/N led her into the house.
“So, how are things going?” Mary asked, as they walked into the kitchen where Y/N had been making dinner.
“Things are… stressful,” Y/N replied, huffing a small laugh. “Though I managed to book a venue yesterday, and that’s taken a lot of pressure off. I was going to tell Dean first, but do you guys wanna know?”
“Oh, that’s wonderful!” Mary exclaimed. “Yes, absolutely!”
Y/N opened her laptop that was kept to the side on the kitchen bench, bringing up the photos of the outdoor venue. “Dean was telling me once that you guys used to drive up here a lot when he and Sam were kids, and I thought I’d try it out. The land is owned by the ranch close by that’s a wedding venue and I asked if we could use this space. They said they had an opening for our date, so I booked it straight away.”
She showed them the photos of a beautiful location, surrounded by trees and a lake. It was perfect for the ceremony, and the clearing nearby would be perfect for the reception.
“Y/N, this is…” John shook his head, speechless as he looked over the photos. “God, the boys used to love going there.”
“Y/N, it’s stunning! Oh, it’s going to a beautiful wedding,” Mary told her, her smile radiant as put her arm around Y/N and brought her close.
“Do you think Dean will like it?” Y/N asked, nervously.
“He definitely will. We used to take the boys fishing there. They never caught a damn thing, but they always loved going,” John replied, reassuringly.
“Okay, good.” Y/N nodded as she closed her laptop. “Because we initially thought about having it here, we don’t have room for 80 people.”
“Well, this is perfect,” Mary said, smiling.
“It is. I can’t wait to show Dean,” Y/N smiled, before standing up and walking into the kitchen to finish preparing dinner.
“Anything I can help with?” Mary asked, leaning against the kitchen island.
“Nope, almost done,” Y/N replied, smiling over at her. “John, there’s beer in the fridge. Mary, wine?”
“I’ll take care of that,” John insisted, taking a beer out before finding the wine Mary liked on the small rack.
In the garage, Dean pulled the Impala up and cut the engine, turning off the car. He sighed tiredly as he leaned his head back against the seat, closing his eyes. It had been a long day, and the last thing he had wanted was to go into work on a Saturday, but being the boss, he was needed. He hated that he couldn’t stay home and help Y/N out with whatever she needed and enjoy time with her, but at least he was back in time to have dinner with her and his parents.
Getting out of the Impala, he locked it and walked around the back of the car to the other side. He tried to slide past his work bench, but rammed right into it, cursing as the edge dug into him, sending a few tools flying to the floor.
“Fuck,” he groaned, closing his eyes.
He blinked a few times, crouching down and picking up the screwdrivers that fell on the floor. As he did, something that had fallen behind the bench caught his eye. He reached behind it, taking out the notebook that had gotten stuck. Opening it, he flipped through the pages, seeing old calculations and notes of his, knowing that they weren't of use now. Suddenly, a page fell out, falling at his feet, with unfamiliar writing on it.
“What…” he mumbled to himself as he held it up, reading over the page properly.
His face fell as he read over the words that were no doubt written by Lisa, recognizing her handwriting now that he could see it properly. She must have used this from his office in their house when she couldn’t find anything else.
Stubborn. Too close to his family. Doesn’t earn enough. Just a mechanic.
It was a pros and cons list. She had made reasons for whether she should stay with him or not. The only thing written on the pros list was that he was a good father figure to Ben. However, the cons outweighed everything as he read over them again. He didn’t earn enough. His job wasn’t good enough. And if that was true then that meant he wasn’t good enough. He knew he shouldn’t care what it said considering he was with Y/N now, and they were engaged, with his relationship with Lisa practically ancient history by now. Yet he couldn’t stop reading over her words.
Crushing the paper into a ball and shoving into his pocket, he shut the notebook, tossing it in the paper basket kept next to the bench. He walked over to the door that led into the house, closing it behind him and walked down the hallway, hearing Y/N’s infectious laugh coming from the living room.
“Hey!” she exclaimed, seeing him enter the room.
“Hey,” he said, walking over to her, kissing her softly as he leaned down. He went over to his parents and hugged them before sitting down next to her.
“How was work?” she asked, smiling at him.
“Tiring,” he replied, huffing slightly, but offered her a smile. “But good. Glad to be home though.”
“Well, I was telling your parents, but I can tell you now,” she started, sharing a smile with John and Mary before she turned back to him. “I found a venue for the wedding.”
“That’s great, sweetheart,” he said, smiling softly as he kissed her again.
Y/N frowned slightly as he pulled away, sensing something wasn’t right with him, but she let it go for now. She hoped that he was just tired from work and that was it.
“Do you want to hear about it?” she asked.
“Yeah, of course,” he replied, too quickly. “Actually, I’m gonna wash up and why don’t you tell me over dinner.”
“Sure,” she agreed, nodding. “Well, food’s ready. We were just waiting on you.”
“Okay,” he muttered, standing up and walking out of the room.
“Does he seem a little off to you?” John questioned, frowning as he looked between Mary and Y/N.
“Something must’ve happened at work,” Y/N sighed, worriedly.
“Well, let’s just hope it’s nothing too serious,” Mary added, her expression matching Y/N’s.
Dean returned after freshening up, just as Y/N, Mary and John walked over to the dining table. They all sat down, each of them taking turns to put food on their plate. They ate in silence, worried eyes glancing between each other and discreetly looking at Dean as he ate. Sensing they needed a distraction first, John and Mary exchanged looks, before she cleared her throat.
“So, we actually have something for both of you,” Mary announced, looking at John, giving him a firm nod.
The elder Winchester took out a small, folded piece of paper from his shirt pocket, and slid it across the wooden table to his son. Dean frowned curiously and Y/N’s eyebrows furrowed, as she looked over Dean’s shoulder. He opened it, both of their eyes widening as they saw what it was. He opened and closed his mouth several times, unable to speak.
“That’s from us, and after we spoke to your mom and dad, we decided to split things between us, so there’s should be coming to you soon,” Mary told Y/N, smiling.
“Mary…” Y/N trailed off, shaking her head as she was still in shock. “We can’t accept this cheque-”
“Guys, this is insane,” Dean finally said, frowning as he looked up at his parents.
“I thought you’d say that, but-” Mary started but Dean cut her off.
“We’re not taking it, mom,” he interrupted, his frustration getting the better of him.
“Dean,” Mary sighed, thinking about how to make him understand. “We’ve been sitting on this money since before you started renovating this place. We tried to hint then too, but you didn’t take it, wanting to do everything yourself. Had you never had this place we would’ve given it to you on your wedding day to put towards a house, just like we did with Sam and Eileen. Considering you have this place now, the least we can do is help with the wedding.”
“You’re really sure about this?” Y/N asked, completely unsure if this was a good idea. Clearly Dean wasn’t accepting this.
“Absolutely,” Mary replied, smiling. “And don’t even think about paying it back, it’s for both of you to use, however you want. Put it towards the wedding, if there’s anything left, put it towards the honeymoon, or savings… whatever you want.”
Dean shook his head, the frown still evident on his face. “So what? This is a pity offer?”
“No,” Mary gasped, eyes wide with shock. “Of course not, Dean. How could you think we would do that?”
He scoffed, turning to glare at Y/N. “I don’t make enough money, right? That’s what this is. You asked them for money.”
Y/N looked at him, unable to get over her shock at the way he was reacting. “What? No. No! Dean, how can you think that?”
Dean chuckled bitterly. He looked down at his food, suddenly losing his appetite. He quickly stood up, pushing up his sleeves as he pushed his chair out. Y/N felt her heart banging repeatedly against her ribcage, as she watched him get up.
“We’re not taking this. No fucking way,” he hissed, pushing the cheque back across the surface.
“Dean,” John’s voice bellowed around the room, staring up at his son with a stern expression.
“Dean, we just wanted to contribute, that’s all, honey,” Mary reasoned, trying to calm the situation. “If this is how you feel, then it’s put to bed. Let’s just enjoy dinner.”
“Yeah, damn right that’s how I feel,” he snapped, as he turned to face her.
“I’m sor-” Mary started but he cut her off again, turning to Y/N.
“Do you think I can’t do this for us?” he asked, his voice eerily calm but the shakiness gave away how upset he was, as he faced Y/N.
Her eyes narrowed in upset as she stood up too, looking at him. “Of course I think you can do this, Dean. How could you even question that?”
“Because it’s exactly what it looks like, Y/N!” he yelled. He scoffed and shook his head, scrubbing a hand down his face. “What I do isn’t good enough. I’m not good enough.”
She visibly flinched; her eyes widened as she looked at him. She had never seen him this upset. She felt tears brim her bottom lids, threatening to fall. John and Mary watched on in horror, unable to understand what was going on with their son.
“What?” she scoffed, shaking her head. “How could you possibly think that?”
“Because it’s true,” he muttered, looking away from her, his jaw clenching tight. “And if you haven’t already, you’ll realize it one day.”
“Dean,” she breathed, a tear rolling down her face as she saw how dejected he looked.
“That’s not true.”
“If you don’t want this anymore, Y/N, there were easier ways to tell me,” he spat, turning away from her and storming off.
“Dean, stop! What’s gotten into you?” she yelled, following behind him.
“I can’t fucking do this right now,” he scoffed.
Mary and John were hot on their heels too as they stopped in the entrance, watching Dean pick up his keys and make his way to the door.
“Dean, where are you going?” Y/N asked, choking as a wave of sadness washed over her.
“I can’t be here,” he muttered, shaking his head. “I need to think.”
“Think about what?” Her voice was cracking, the tears finally falling down her face. Everything was falling apart in the span of a few minutes, and she had no idea why. Why was he acting like this?
“I don’t know, Y/N, okay?” he snapped, turning to pin her with a scowl. “I just… I gotta get outta here.” Gesturing around him, he turned to open the door.
His mind was cloudy with all the doubts he was having at that moment. He needed a drink and some time to cool off. He walked through the threshold, not looking back at Y/N.
“Dean, wait-” she started but the door slamming as he left, cut her off.
Y/N felt knots in her stomach, tightening and moving into her chest. She tried to breathe normally but started to feel as if her throat was closing off, cutting off her air supply. Tears stung her eyes as they continued to flow down her face. She began hyperventilating, her hands cupping over her mouth as she began to cry. Her body shook with the force of her sobs. Her legs felt like jelly, like any minute she would collapse and wouldn’t be able to get up again.
“Oh, honey,” Mary whispered, as she wrapped her arms around Y/N tightly.
“I don’t… k-know what I did to-to make him think-” she stuttered, stopping as she sobbed.
“You didn’t do anything, sweetie. I just… There's something wrong. I didn’t think he would act like this. At most, he would be annoyed and then eventually give in. But this?” Mary tried to figure out what was going on, but shook her head as she couldn’t think of what could be wrong with her son.
“I’ll go talk to him,” John offered.
“No, he just needs space to process whatever’s going on in his head,” Y/N sniffled, pulling away from Mary as she looked between them. “You can head home if you want to. I’m so sorry.”
“You have nothing to apologize for,” John stated, wrapping his arm around her shoulder, and hugging her as she was between him and Mary. “Everything’s gonna be okay, don’t you worry.”
The silence made her mind wander off into irrational directions. Had she done something to make Dean this upset? Had she said anything to make him think he wasn’t good enough? She loved him so much, and she wanted nothing more than to be his wife, but if she had really made him feel that way, then she was the one who wasn’t good enough for him.
She managed to convince John and Mary that she was fine enough for them to leave, insisting they take some food home with them. They said their goodbyes, and Y/N headed upstairs, completely exhausted after the whirlwind evening. As she got changed in the walk-in closet, she felt more tears sting her eyes. They rolled down her face, but she didn’t make a move to wipe them away as she changed.
She just wanted Dean to come home so that they could talk and forget about what just happened.
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Dean drove around town for a while, the words he said to Y/N plaguing his mind. He was just so angry after finding that list from Lisa, it just came out in the worst way possible. He reached the regular bar that he would go to with the guys, needing at least one drink to calm himself down.
Sitting down at the bar, he ordered a whiskey double, neat, and gulped the first one down in one shot. Asking for another, he nursed it as he thought about everything that had happened in the past half hour. His anger had dissolved quickly and had morphed into fear. Fear at what he would or wouldn’t find when he got home. As a Queen song played in the background from the jukebox, he quickly realized how much it was mirroring the situation they had found themselves in.
Love of my life, you’ve hurt me
You’ve broken my heart, and now you leave me
Love of my life, can’t you see?
Bring it back, bring it back
Don’t take it away from me
Because you don’t know
What it means to me
He realized how he had overreacted, that his parents, just being the people that they are, would just give the cheque to them. He shouldn’t have taken his anger out on them and Y/N. Hell, she didn’t even know what he was upset about. That considered, he knew that he wasn’t good enough for her, especially now. Taking out his phone, he looked at the screen and saw a few missed calls from her and a few texts. Gulping the lump in his throat, he opened the messages and felt his heart sink into his stomach as he read over them. There were three, and as he read the words over again, he felt tears prick his eyes.
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She had nothing to be sorry for. He was the asshole that let things blow out of proportion, all because he let one stupid note get to him. Determined to make it home and fix everything, Dean paid for his drink and left the bar.
He hoped like hell that he hadn’t ruined his whole future in one evening.
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Dean entered through the door from the garage. Not a single light was on as he walked further in, seeing the kitchen, dining and living area completely dark. Taking a deep breath, he turned towards the stairs and began the climb to the second floor, knowing he had to face whatever came next, even if he was fearing it so much that his stomach was in knots.
He walked towards their bedroom and stood at the threshold, his heart breaking at what he saw. Only one of the bedside lamps was on, providing the only light in the room. Y/N was lying on the bed, her back to the door, her knees drawn up as she laid in the foetal position, her shoulders shaking. She was sobbing quietly, the sounds low but somehow so loud in the quiet room. With every cry, a piece of his heart felt like it was shattering into smaller shards.
He moved slowly towards the bed, sitting down on the edge, watching as her head slowly turned. Her eyes were red and puffy, wet from the tears she had shed. She looked at him, sitting up slowly, their eyes meeting. Suddenly, she launched herself into him, wrapping her arms around him tightly, crying into the crook of his neck. He felt tears prick his eyes, letting a few escape as he felt his sadness wash over him.
“Y/N,” he choked out. “I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I never should’ve said the things that I did, I shouldn’t have reacted that way.”
“I was so scared,” she whispered, her voice breaking. “I’m sorry for whatever I did, please, just tell me.”
“Sweetheart,” he whispered, pulling her away and cupping her face, looking her deep in the eyes. “I didn’t mean to scare you. I’m so sorry.”
“How could you ever doubt how I feel about you?” she asked, her voice croaky from how much she had cried. “How could you ever think you’re not good enough for me? What did I do to make you think that?”
“You didn’t do anything, sweetheart. I promise. This was… this was all me and my crap,” he said, shaking his head.
“What did I do to make you doubt me?” she cried, fresh tears making tracks down her face.
“Nothing, sweetheart,” he reassured her, frantically moving towards her, grasping her shoulders. “You didn’t do anything, okay? This… this is the reason I overreacted.”
She frowned as he handed her the paper, but opened the folded page and read over the words written on there. She was confused, knowing she didn’t write this, her eyebrows lifting in realization as she read over the “pros” column.
“I’ll kill her,” she growled, looking up at him with a ferocity in her eyes. “I’ll… God, I wanna hurt her!”
Y/N stood up from the bed and paced the floor, her whole body shaking with how angry she was at that moment. She couldn’t believe that something like this could come between them, showing that Lisa still had a grip on Dean’s mind.
“She doesn’t get to do this to you anymore, Dean!” she yelled, holding up the piece of paper. “She doesn’t get to ruin our future!”
He scoffed a chuckle, shaking her head. “I nearly let her.”
“So, don’t,” Y/N said, walking up to him. She cupped his face in her hands, making him look up at her as he sat on the bed. “You are good enough for me. Every part of you. I love you for exactly who you are, and if I have to spend the rest of our lives together trying to convince you that you’re my one, my everything, that there’s not a doubt in my mind that you’re so right for me, then I’ll do it.”
Wrapping her arms around him, his forehead rested against her chest as she laid her cheek on his head. She held him tightly, neither of them wanting to move away from the other.
“I’m sorry, I’m an idiot,” he muttered, his hands on her hips, feeling the material of his black t-shirt she was wearing against his skin. “I just saw that cheque, and I thought about that list, and I just overreacted.”
“No, you’re not,” she stated, kissing the top of his head. “You were upset.”
“That’s no excuse,” he whispered, hating himself for taking it out on her. “You didn’t deserve that. I uh… I wouldn’t blame you if you wanted to end this-”
“Dean, stop,” she choked out, pressing her forehead to his, combing her hand through his hair.
He shook his head, lifting it to look into her eyes. “I’ve been… I’ve been thinking about this even before finding that list. I’m always scared I’m gonna say or do something to give you a reason to leave me. If that happened… I know I wouldn’t survive it.”
Y/N frustratedly wiped her tears away, looking around the room for her sweats. Finding them, she roughly pulled them on and slipped on her sneakers, putting on a light shirt over the black t-shirt she was wearing. Dean watched her; confusion riddled his face as she moved around the room.
“Sweetheart, what are you doing?” he asked, his voice wavering as his mind started to make up horrific scenarios.
“Come with me,” she said, firmly, a determined look on her face as she held her hand out.
“Where are we-” he started but she cut him off, grabbing his arm and pulling him away from the bed.
“Shut up,” she muttered, scowling as she dragged him behind her, down the stairs and out of the house, just as she picked up her keys from the table at the entrance.
Knowing he couldn’t argue when she looked so distressed, he followed behind her as they made their way to her car.
“Get in,” she demanded, harshly.
He was shaking, wondering what the hell had come over her suddenly but again did as he was told without saying anything that would possibly make her angrier than he already had. He couldn’t tell what he had done, but she was upset with him.
Dean looked on in silence as Y/N backed out and turned the car, the tires screeching as she sped off down the road. He gulped as she drove, his mind trying to talk itself out of thinking she was possibly going to kill him and dump his body somewhere. However, he also found her anger strangely arousing. They drove ten minutes before he recognized that she wasn’t going to do that, and that she had turned down a very familiar street. They drove past several houses before she stopped, pulling the car up to the curb and cutting the engine.
“Get out,” she ordered, leaving the keys in the ignition and opening the driver’s side door, slamming it shut as she stood on the road.
He got out, closing the passenger door and following behind her, looking around the dark street and quickly realizing they were standing in front of her previous rental house, just across from his and Lisa’s, all that time ago. She pulled at his jacket and he stumbled, straightening when she pulled him to stand in a specific spot next to the curb. She looked up at him, standing directly in front of him as the deep glare, her eyes riddled with sadness, was still on her face.
“Do you remember what happened here?” she asked, her eyes welling with unshed tears.
Frowning, he shook his head as he was unable to think straight, his mind clouded by the sudden change in her demeanour. “Y/N, I-”
“Do you remember what happened here, Dean?” she repeated, her voice cracking slightly as she raised it.
He sighed, glancing between the two houses, giving her a curt nod. “Of course I do.”
“Tell me,” she ordered, not breaking her eye contact with him, the scowl still present.
“It’s…” he cleared his throat, pushing down the lump in his throat as he looked at her. “It’s where I helped you with your stuff. It’s… it’s where we met.”
“Yeah,” she whispered, a tear rolling down her face as she nodded slowly. “And it’s also where my life changed forever. Even if I didn’t know it at the time.”
“Y/N,” he breathed, trying to reach for her hand but she pulled away, making his heart sink. She had never done that. Never.
“Do you remember what was happening in that house?” she asked, the tears flowing freely down her face as she looked across the street.
He looked over, breathing heavily, his breath shaky as he exhaled but said nothing. He remembered all too well.
“You thought you were happy. You thought everything was fine… but you were losing yourself because of-” she choked, shaking her head, overwhelmed as she thought about those early days and her first impressions of his relationship with Lisa. “Because of her, and you didn’t even know it.”
He was silent, unable to say anything or even try to deny it, because he knew it was true. Turning his head to Y/N, he saw her looking up at him, the glare finally disappearing, her eyes holding a determined look despite the tears.
“And now, you could lose yourself because of her again if you don’t stop yourself from thinking that she's right,” she stated, stepping closer to him. “She was never right and she never will be. She didn’t know you like I do. She didn’t love you like I do. She’s gone from our lives… so don’t bring her back into it by going back into the shell she put you in.”
His jaw clenched as he shut his eyes, squeezing them tight as a tear slipped down his right cheek. Lifting her hand, she cupped his cheek and brushed it away with her thumb, stroking his jaw. She pushed up on her tiptoes, capturing his plump lips between hers, kissing him hard and desperately. She needed him to see there was nothing there to leave him over.
Pulling away from the kiss but keeping close, she looked at him as her thumbs stroked along his cheeks. “You’ll never give me a reason to leave you. Not now, not ever.”
“You got a lot of confidence in me, sweetheart,” he muttered, a slight scoff in his tone.
She smiled softly, knowing that if he couldn’t see it himself, she’d spend forever showing him he was worth more than he gave himself credit for.
“Yeah,” she said, nodding. “I do.”
“I’m so sorry,” he whispered, leaning his forehead against hers.
“Don’t be,” she whispered back, her eyes closing, content to be close to him again. “We’re going to be okay.”
“You think so?” he asked, his voice laced with hope, as he lifted his head to look at her properly.
“I know so,” she replied, a soft smile on her face. “You’re not getting rid of me any time soon, Winchester.”
“You still wanna marry me after that?” he asked, a small smile tugging at his lips.
“Yes,” she said, simply as she pushed herself closer into him. “You can’t let something she thought affect you because it’s not true. It doesn’t matter what she thinks. So… promise me, right now, that you’re going to let this go. All that matters is you and me.”
Looking deep into her eyes, he remembered everything they had been through together, and thought about all the amazing things they still had to experience. He wasn’t going to let someone from his past ruin his future.
“I promise,” he said, firmly.
She smiled up at him, moving in and capturing his lips, kissing him passionately. “I love you.”
“I love you, too, sweetheart,” he whispered. “So fucking much.”
“Let’s go home,” she whispered back, stroking her hand lightly over the back of his head. “I think I need to show you just how much I love you.”
He hummed against her lips, kissing her softly. “Yes, please.”
She laughed, biting her lip. “I scared you a little, didn’t I?”
“Well, when I didn’t think about how you could be plotting to kill me,” he joked, smirking as she chuckled, “it was kinda hot to see you pissed off.”
She shook her head, rolling her eyes as she giggled. “You’re crazy.”
“Hey,” he called out, pulling her closer, his hands sliding down to her hips. “I can’t help the fact that it turned me on, sweetheart. It’s just the magic of you.”
She felt her cheeks heat up, pressing her lips together as she tried not to smile. “Let’s go before someone sees us out here.”
Hand in hand, they walked back to the car, separating as they got in. He glanced back at the old house once more, feeling an enormous weight lift off him as he looked at the place that held a lot of pain before Y/N came along. That weight had resurfaced when he saw that list that Lisa had made, but as she always did, Y/N had been there to stop him from losing his way. She was the one who built him back up to the person that he used to be, the one who reignited his spirit. He had known early on how special she was, and she proved time and time again that she was there to stay.
And now, he was never going to lose sight of that. He let Lisa get into his head again, but for the final time, he was putting an end to that. He had someone by his side who wanted to be with him forever, and he was never going to forget that ever again.
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Y/N sat at the dining table the next morning, her coffee in hand, all of her plans for the wedding spread out in front of her. She smiled as she sent a few texts out to the girls, asking them if they were available the next weekend to start looking for her wedding dress. As she was looking at photos, she flinched slightly, feeling Dean’s lips against her neck, moving down to her exposed shoulder, the sleeve of his t-shirt she was wearing having slipped down.
“Oh my god, Dean, don’t look!” she yelled, hiding her screen with her hands.
He chuckled, shaking his head as he sat down beside her. “Babe, you haven’t even found a dress yet. I’m pretty sure it’s okay if I can see those.”
“I know, but I don’t want you to see in case I do find something like this,” she explained, smiling sheepishly. “I want to surprise you.”
He smiled as he leaned forward, kissing her softly. “You’re gonna knock me out no matter what dress you pick. Just sayin’.”
“Even if I look like a frosted cupcake?” she teased, giggling.
“Well, yeah,” he agreed, his lips hovering close to hers. “‘Cause then you’ll look good enough to eat.”
“That’s so cheesy,” she snorted, laughing.
“You love it,” he grinned, chuckling along with her.
She pressed her lips to his, kissing him lightly but he had other plans, his arms wrapping around her and pulling her off her chair, onto his lap. She moaned softly against his lips as his fingers ran lightly over her bare thighs, the t-shirt riding up as she straddled him.
“So…” she pulled away from the kiss, reaching for the cheque on the table and showing it to him. “What do we want to do with this?”
“We use it,” he replied, nodding confidently as he smirked. “If there’s any left, we save it for the future, including anything your parents are sending.”
She beamed, brushing her knuckles against his cheek. “Sounds good.”
As they sat there together, having breakfast and coffee as they talked about the plans, Dean was leaving all the negative thoughts behind with the confidence that the woman sitting next to him wasn’t going anywhere. With the promises already made the previous night, he smiled as he thought about all the new ones he would make on the day she finally became his wife.
On the day the next chapter of their lives started.
A chapter he couldn’t wait to explore with Y/N by his side.
-x-
Tags: @deanwanddamons​ // @winchest09​ // @downanddirtydean​ // @jensengirl83​ // @wonder-cole​ // @that-one-gay-girl​ // @whatareyousearchingfordean​ // @flamencodiva​ // @danneelsmain​ // @ellewritesfix05​ // @roonyxx​ // @akshi8278​ //@hobby27​ // @michellethetvaddict​ // @spngirl05​ // @kyjey​ // @440mxs-wife​ // @stoneyggirl​ // @stoneyggirl2​​ // @deanswaywardgirl​​ // @redbarn1995​​ // @marianita195​ // @babypink224221​​ // @deans-baby-momma​​ // @parinarain​​ // @thoughts-and-funnies​​ // @mandalou29​​ // @jerkbitchidjitassbutt​​ // @supernatural-love14​​ // @vicmc624​​ // @prettyboyswow​​ // @lunarmoon8​​ // @irmcpar​​ // @compresshischest09​​ // @weepingwillowphoenix​​ // @xlynnbbyx​​ // @whiskey-infused-dreams​​ // @perpetualabsurdity​​ // @verytoadpapersoul​​ // @pink-sparkly-witch​​ //
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maturemenoftvandfilms · 3 years ago
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The Senator from Montana
CHAPTER FIVE: Down on the Farm-PART 2
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Featuring Sen. Jon Tester (D-MT)
I had come down to Sen. Jon Tester’s Family Farm, a 1,800-acre ranch outside Big Sandy to sign some very important papers. I was only supposed to be there for a few hours. An in and out, but after some alone time fun with Jon. I unknowingly missed my flight back to D. C.. Now I was rescheduling a flight back and trying to find a place to stay for the night.
"You can stay here in the spare room." Jon and his wife offered.
I accepted this generous offer, needing a place to stay! The spare bedroom was exactly that, spare. It had a single bed in the center of the room and nothing more. I wasn't really tired but there wasn't much else to do, so I began undressing for bed, slipping out of my clothes to my underwear. I pulled my shorts off and lay on top of the bed with my legs slightly spread. I ran a hand down my chest and stomach. It felt good. I was so overcome with lust, I grabbed my cock and began jerking it real slow. All while imaging myself fucking Jon's ass. Before long I was spewing a fresh creamy load all over the sheets covering the bed.
I had fallen asleep watching TV when I was awakened by Jon snuggling up behind me. I tried to turn over.
“Hold still until I get it in.” Jon called out, “I want to fuck you again.”
"Sharla is asleep already. She took a sleep aid and she won't wake up till morning." Jon said as he put more pressure on his cock and sent it deep into my hole.
"Oh shit! Give it to me!" I cried out as Jon immediately started fucking me hard and fast.
I reached around and grabbed his head and pulled it toward mine as I turned it to the side. We kissed each other, sliding our tongues together as his cock worked its way in and out of my ass. He began to move left and right with is dick, opening my asshole. With each twist I moaned of pain and pleasure. He lifted my right leg into the air, holding it in place so he could get better access to my tight ass.
“Damn boy, take my cock! Take it all!” Jon called out as he pushed his dick as far up my asshole as it would go and held it there.
“You like it, Boy? You like my cock up your ass?” Jon asked.
“Yes.” I admitted.
"Damn right you do!" Jon called out as he started pounding my asshole harder with his thick dick.
I began to fuck him back, rocking on my side pushing my hungry hole farther on to his cock. We were both moaning as it felt so good that I didn't want it to end.
Suddenly Jon pulled out leaving me empty. The next thing I knew he flipped me on my back and got between my legs lifting them high in the air. And then in one smooth motion, raised my butt up off the bed, placed his cock at the hole. He wasted no time to get his dick all the way up my ass, feeling my own dick go extra hard as Jon's tip buried itself deep inside. Placing my legs over his shoulders, Jon began to pump his hips slowly making sure to give me the full length of his cock with each stroke.  
"Yeah, fuck me Jon. Yeah!!!!!" I called out looking straight into his ruggedly handsome face.
I couldn't say anything else except to moan and enjoy the pleasure. I knew that he was not going to cum, not yet. He wanted to work my ass until I begged him to fuck me harder, faster. I wasn't ready for that quite yet either. I wanted to feel his cock move inside me, making love to me.
"I might fuck you all night. What do you think of that?" He asked with a hint of a smile on his face.
“Yes, Sir. Fuck me, senator! I want to be your boy.” I told him.
“You are my boy, my fuck boy!” Jon said as he pulled his dick out of my asshole until only its head remained inside. Then looking straight into my eyes, he rammed his dick back inside as far as it would go.
“Damn if your ass it’s hotter than Sharla’s pussy.” Jon told me as he started pumping his dick in and out of me with powerful strokes that had me bucking and moaning.
By now my ass was wide open and no longer resisted his pushing in and out. The wetness of my love canal was exciting him as he started to gyrate his hips to give me the full effect of his cock rimming me out. Looking up, seeing his large body starting to glisten with sweat and his cheeks flushed made me hot. Jon was almost sobbing with sheer pleasure his dick was giving him and accentuated by me playing with his nipples dangling in front of my face.
Then right in the middle of the brutal fucking, he leaned forward and kissed me again, so I passionately kissed him back. His balls were bouncing against my ass cheeks and his mouth was kissing my mouth. He again began to move left and right with is dick, widening me up for a grand slam, which he managed to build up to. My legs were lifted onto his shoulders as his hands gripped my hips, holding them in place, giving him a tight ass access. Pumping in and out, making his chest muscles pop, and his sweat drip on to me.
Jon was using me as his fuck toy and I fucking loved it!! My cock was rock hard and dripping with pre cum as I reached down to press it against my senator’s big belly. I was like a doll in his big rough hands and rode his cock like I was in the Derby. By now, my load uncontrollably squirted all over the space between us. The sensation seemed endless, it was the most amazing orgasm ever!
Then with the thrusting reaching fever pitch I felt his dick throbbing inside me. His eyes were squeezed shut and I could tell he was holding off with all his might, but finally the tide came.
“Get ready for it!” Jon warned as he slammed into me three quick times.
Then with a grunt, I finally felt his cum shoot through his cock into me as waves of ecstasy swept his body. I held him tight while his body convulsed with his orgasm. And with a final few thrusts he fell on top of me panting with sweat dripping off his forehead. We smiled at each other for a few seconds before our lips connected in a post-coital kiss.
"Jack," He said in a short breath, "I can't thank you enough for doing this with me."
"I'm here to serve senator." I whispered softly to Jon.
Now noticing I was still hard, Jon moved down, grabbed my dick and started sucking the last few drops out of me. I felt myself fixing to cum again when he suddenly took his mouth away from my cock.
“You near cuming?” He asked. When I nodded yes, he said. “I want you to fuck me. I want you to shoot off in my ass.”
Damn if that wasn’t exactly what I wanted. As good as him sucking me had felt, the thoughts of fucking him had been in the back of my mind all the time. Without saying a word, Jon climbed on top of me and kissed me, his big body pushing into me as his tongue explored my mouth. It started off rather slow, but a minute into it, we were both huffing and puffing. The passion returned to both of us as he was rubbing his dick against me as hard as he could. The friction of our dicks rubbing together was fantastic.
Lifting himself up off me, Jon reached behind himself, raised up a little and started playing with my cock. He started running my dick up and down his crack before pushing his butt down on my shaft. Without warning, I reached down and pulled his buns apart and slammed my cock in him really hard making a loud slapping sound as he let out a bear-like groan.
"You really want this ass huh? Well, you can fuck me as hard as you want." He said as he started bouncing his big beautiful body up and down on my cock.
I let him take control, riding my cock, stopping whenever he thought I was getting close to coming so we could kiss some more. After teasing me and prolonging the excitement, I was desperate to cum. So I grabbed him by the hips and started pounding his ass furiously.
By the time I was getting close, this respected three-term democratic senator, father of 2, married for almost 43 years was begging me to fuck him harder. This was the few times where he could truly let go and be himself, to surrender all of himself to the pleasures that he had always sought after. His cock was leaking all over me and I knew from the look on his face that he was getting close himself. I doubled my effort and pounded his butt even harder, knowing exactly where to hit in his bowels.
"Shit, you’re gonna fuck the cum out of me, stud!" Jon cried out loud as he felt the first wave of his climax hit him.
I picked up his pace even more, slamming Jon’s butt even more rapidly. This heightened Jon's pleasure as spurts after spurts of married cum splattered on my chest and stomach. His body convulsed with each spurt as he emptied out his seed onto me, still pumping up and down on my dick. The contraction of his ass on my dick while he went through his orgasm brought my own climax. I shot my small load into him. After the previous day when he had drained the biggest loads, I thought this one felt as good if not better, but I didn't have much left in me.
He smiled at me and said, "I guess I know how to take care of my assistant." Followed by a wink as he climbed off the bed and grabbed his boxer shorts. I watched as he got dressed then slipped out of the bedroom.
The next morning, I awoke to the smell of wonderful coffee, bacon and toast filling the room. So I got up, showered, dressed and wondered into the kitchen to find Mrs. Tester shoveling piles of fluffy scrambled eggs onto three plates, along with wonderfully crisp bacon strips and buttered toast. Jon was sitting at the table drinking coffee. He hadn't noticed me yet as I stood in the doorway admiring that beautiful butt again.  
"How was your night? You slept OK?" Mrs. Tester asked bringing me back to reality.
"I slept great. Totally satisfied." I said as Jon smiled with a hint of pride behind her.  
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rintarous · 4 years ago
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ayo we reached another milestone today and with that i shall celebrate by doing shit like this! corny but whatever!! anyway i just wanna thank you all for reading, going through, enjoying the shit i post out on the tl! i always have a lot of laughs whenever i open this godforsaken website cs all i do is talk shit lol. i’ll put out content soon again i swear. my brain is just dehydrated and needs some writing juice lol
to my mutuals, hi <3 teehee <3 some of us don’t rlly interact much let alone talk but hi!!! i’m jan !! HAHAHAHAHHA hope some of us interact/talk more <3 just know i’m just as chaotic as atsumu on the tl <3 talk shit but i dont get hit!! 
p.s i have some lil messages for certain people under the line break hehe
— jan ♡
@dorkyama @memetabolismm @agaassi @futabtchy @gogohaikyuu @shotobabe @kenchiko @ahegaobaku @daiseukis @wakaitoshi @tiny-giant @sushij1ma @inakou @caxsthetic @yusemis @sillawara @rosiewrite @the-black-birb @haikyuu-ink @babiedeku @bambisfuneral @jojosmilktea @iwaqchan @sunbeamwrites @kozumie @t-amajiki​
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to: remy,
jesus fucking christ where do i fucking begin.. it was like we were destined to be mutuals cs literally, you are my bethie. my telefatty bethie and i’m so thankful for that. my tendou bestie mad dog chan senpai. the tendou to your mad dog. idk what the fuck were we thinking when we made that stupid shit up but holy fucking shit ! talking to you just makes my day cs u’re so funny literally the funniest person i know i die of laughter just talking to u and how u just listen to the stupid shit i say and WOW umm anyways... our jokes are superior (along with julia and cheese duh) ,, yeah i lov u a lot not that i’d admit that on the tl u better savor this piece of shit HAHAHAHAHAHAH love u rems u know that (or not) muah
to: juwia,
DUDE ANOTHER PERSON I DON’T REGRET MEETING ON THE TL... those goddamn stinky haru jokes are our legacy dude... we literally met because of him............. my god..... we’ve come a long way since,,, fkbu,, our favorite,,, is getting a third episode..... i really do enjoy your company juwia even if i lowkey clown the fuck out of u (read: lava girl sunbaenim; mineta tease) but ur also literally so funny and i lov u so much and the way u introduced KS to me and our shitty radio show (vibe-rodeo-radio) YOU FUCKING RAM RANCH SHIT JESUS CHRIST u made my quarantine more bearable like omg i love u so much i literally wait for ur responses cs theyre so fucking funny and the discord thing.. iconic cockqueenies for life yo...... HAHAHHA love u juwia!!! muah 
to: ate silla,
omg ate silla hi ! we’re dont rlly talk much cs i only interact via asks but i would die for u.... ur literally my dream ate and ur so fucking funny ur such an icon i want to be like you some day.... ur posts just *muah* chefs kiss.. they also make my damn day cs wow ur so funny bae ahahahahahha AAAAA love u ate silla !!!! 
to: jojo, 
JOJO HI 🙈 this is literally so fucking surreal to me cs you were literally one of my main inspirations to start my own anime blog.. i rmb going through ur shit unsure if i should make my own anime related writings and now look at us.. mutuals 🙈 we don’t rlly talk much too cs we only interact on the tl but i would rlly like us to talk more!! u’re literally so cute and ur presence on this website is really comforting and i would order a shit ton of milktea from ur milktea shop teehee LOVE YOU JOJO! MUAH 
to: sabrina,
SAAAAAAABBBBBB MY LIFE SAVER OMFG i fucking owe my life to u for teaching me how to gif my shit 🥺 literally made my quarantine less boring and shit holy fuck... you are the sweetest person ever i wish we talked more :( timezones are a bitch aren’t they HAHAHAHAHAA thank you for taking some time off your day to teach me shit 🥺 i love you bc of that 😔 my themes wouldnt slap as hard as it does now without you so i owe you for that 😭 anyway i hope we really do talk more !! LOVE YOU SABS !!! MUAH
to: ate yuki,
ATEEEE YUKIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE i also owe u my fucking life for getting me photoshop and all the other adobe shit 🥺 super duper thankful ako sayo dahil doon ate 🥺 you are super duper talented too enge naman ng talent dyan achi :< HAHAHAHAHAHAH i really admire you and your talent in art ate yukie omg.. nakakatuwa rin if i see you interacting with me and shit hehe lalo na yung mga asks HAHAHAHAHA hope we talk more soon!!! 😚 love you ate yukie!!
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once again, thank you all. 🥰  to more shitty™ content soon! 🥂
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crush-check · 4 years ago
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cowboy au, pirate au, and cosmic deity au!!
Cowboy AU: We’re just two out of eighteen naked cowboys in the showers at Ram Ranch (jk but I already answered the cowboy one awhile ago lol)
Pirate AU: In a pirate au, I imagine myself as a loyal first mate to the infamous Captain Frazer (I can’t imagine myself as an actual captain oop) and Nate as a Jack-Sparrow-esque captain where he keeps CLAIMING to have this huge ship and crew and bounty for his head, and the only thing he isn’t lying about is the bounty because he’s such an annoyance. He and Chloe (I mean uh *cough* Captain Frazer) have a little history, so when he needs a favor or wants to team up she begrudgingly obliges but still makes it known that she’s better than him. Because of this he ends up hanging out on the ship a lot--normally doing navigation or planning for whatever he’s gonna pull off with the Captain--so I see him all the time and I don’t REALLY know who he is exactly except that somehow this scrappy nobody is somehow on Captain Frazer’s good side. Over time, I start to casually ask questions about him and talk to him directly, and he takes a liking to me. Suddenly we’re kissing in the chart room and I’m kind of terrified that the Captain is gonna find out and kill me because of their implied relationship. Nate assures me that they aren’t together, but based on his fantastical stories I can tell that he’s a bit of a liar and I don’t really know whether to believe him or not. What I do know for sure is that I’m fucked in several ways, because I’m definitely in love with him. 
Cosmic Deity AU: This seems so predictable but I’m definitely the moon and Nate’s definitely the sun. He’s far more optimistic and ambitious and warm towards other’s than I am, while I’m cooler and reserved and more of a dreamer. I imagine Nate as the very definition of chaotic good, using his powers/abilities with good intent but things not always going smoothly. I think I would use mine a little more sparingly and only when truly needed, though I also think he would influence me to become a little more of a Bastard(TM) sometimes. Nate is always warm--like, physically. His skin always seems to have a glow about it, his smiles and smirks are absolutely radiant, the temperature itself increases when he’s around. Seriously, he’s like a damn space heater. I, on the other hand, am always cool to the touch--cold hands, icy stares when I’m pissed off at others, a mysterious sort of air about me that’s both ominous and inviting all at once. We love to show each other the beauty in our beings. He loves to gaze at the stars and planets with me at night, I love to sunbathe and watch the world basked in a yellow glow with him during the day. Our favorite time to spend together is sundown, where our two worlds meet together in a sea of color. It is truly prime kissing hour, even if the act of the sun itself setting tends to make Nate sleepy. He would stay awake for weeks on end if I asked him to. Less than an hour is nothing to him as long as it makes me happy. 
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bakugouscentedcaramel · 5 years ago
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Southern Sweetheart
Here's 2.5k words of Southern S/O X Bakugou, enjoy the feast my darlins.
The smell of freshly tilled dirt just made you even more eager to see your family. The way the wheat fields moved like waves in the ocean eased your nerves and just proved you were finally back home. You finally convinced your boyfriend to tag along with you for the weekend, but he might've underestimated the extent of what was to come. This here land was your Homeland and he was in a strange alien world.
"Tch, I still don't know why we gotta come all the way out in the middle of nowhere to meet your fuckin family." Katsuki grumbled as he sank deeper into the passenger seat of your Wrangler.
"Cuz Hot Stuff, you've only met em once and it were only for bout 20 minutes. Besides they love ya as far as they can throw ya." You shifted gears to accommodate the transition from road to backroads, causing him to grip his seat a bit tighter.
"You good babe? I'm only goin' 50. Do you want me to slow down ya city slicker?"
OH BOY CAN YOU
"Fuck you, I'm just not used to these fuckin pothOLES" he reached for every handle your car had to offer and braced himself as he felt the wheels slam inside a crater.
You purposely hit a monster pothole head on to shut him up. Evoking a glare from your normally badass lover.
"Oh yer fine Katsu, if Ole Bessie here can handle a ragin' cow in heat she can handle a little pothole. Just try to relax and think of it like a rollercoaster." You slapped the side of your car door and gave him a wicked smirk.
"Only thing ya gotta worry bout is the rogue buck, so keep an eye out. It is deer o' clock after all."
"Tch I thought 'Ole Bessie' could handle a 'ragin' cow', you're telling me she can't handle a deer?"
"Not at 67 miles per hour, Katsu."
"WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING SO DAMN FAST"
"It's an unspoken rule to fly down these roads." You shifted gears and smirked as he sunk deeper into the seat due to the force of Ole Bessie claiming the road.
"Goddammit Y/n stop trying to fuckin scare me."
"Ah so it's workin then? Admit it Katsu!" You shifted again causing the speedometer to jump to 86.
"GODDAMIT YES OK IM FUCKIN SCARED OF YOU GOING THIS DAMN FAST ON A DIRT FUCKIN ROAD OK??" His were hands uncontrollably creating small Sparks out of sheer panic at this point.
"Fine, I'll slow it down a smidge. Jussa smidge though. How's 76?"
"GODDAMMIT Y/N!!!"
----
You smirk knowing what was coming up ahead. You knew Katsuki has probably never smelled farmland or even seen a real actual cow in flesh n blood and you couldn't help but giggle.
"THE HELL IS THAT?" He covered his nose and fanned the air staring at you accusingly.
"Well, roll up the windahs darlin', you're bout to smell some good ole dairy cows."
"What the fuck do you mean."
You point to his window and he looks out it to see a whole herd of dairys just grazing and swatting flies. You couldn't help but love his expression. You were right, he's never personally seen cattle before.
"Why are there so fuckin many."
"How do you think we fill up entire tankers full o' milk Katsu. We gotta have a bunch of em. You're lookin at this year's yearlin's. They ain't even fully grown yet and they're already built like tanks."
He pretended not to be interested but you could see him sneaking looks out of the corner of your eye.
Oh if only he knew what you had in store for him.
----
The sunset peaked over the crest of a corn field, you both were in the car for about 4 hours now and you still had a small bit to go still. You glanced over at him and he was sound asleep. His right hand propped his face against the doors' armrest and he was manspreading. His face was relaxed and showing you a softer side of him only you knew about. His gentle breaths putting you at ease. You couldn't help but keep stealing glances at him wondering how you could snag this piece of man.
You turned down the radio for him and you reached out to his left hand and rubbed the back of it gently. You were so blessed to have him by your side, especially since his family loved him to death even if they knew him so little. You truly were-
"FUCKIN CHRIST-" you slammed on the brakes causing you both to nearly fly into the dashboard.
Katsuki instinctively went into fight or flight and almost blew your windshield up before-
"MOVE OUT THE FUCKIN ROAD YOU GOTDAMN FUTURE VENISON BURGER" You slammed on your horn and the deer bounded back into the woods.
"WHAT THE FUCK JUS-"
"It's just a goddamn deer, fucker came outta nowhere I swear to Christ. Sorry to wake you up darlin'."
"Get out, I'm driving."
"The fUCk you are?! We're almost there anyway Katsu. Fucker probably came from out gotdamn land anyways." You pressed on the gas and continued your journey.
He huffed as you kept going, pretty much just blowing off his offer. At least he could collect his heart from the floor and relax a bit before finally getting to your place.
"Katsu, fair warnin, my family is well, out there."
"Really? I couldn't tell based off of you 'Darlin'"
"Heh, you gonna learn today then."
You whipped into the driveway causing Katsuki to glare at you for throwing him around. He looked to see what was your house, a seemingly picture perfect two storied ranch house fitted with an extended porch and a white picket fence. He would've made a comment about it being cliche before you rolled down the windows and nearly put your whole torso out of the window before-
"SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOEY"
Katuski flinched at your loud outburst seemingly at random before realizing what that meant.
Out came your parents who replied with their own pig call and rushed down the steps. Your brother stood at the porch and just waved at you two.
"What in the fuck is going on."
----
After introductions and a night's rest Katsuki woke up to a rooster.
His eyes shot open and he flinched before he realized where he was. You were in the same bed and were snuggling into his bicep, he brushed some hair behind your ear and smirked before holding you closer to him. He was about to kiss your forehead before that damned rooster crowed again. You shifted in your half awake daze.
"Babe, there's an uncooked chicken nugget that's about to be deep fried, get up."
You mumbled incoherently.
He shook you awake gently, "babe I'm gonna roast that fuckin bird if you don't get up."
"mmm -Jerry alone…"
"What was that my lasso?"
"Leave Jerry alone.. he's a jackass but hnn…" you groaned reluctantly. "Wait… YOUR LASSO?? IS THAT A NEW NICKNAME KATSU??"
"Fuckin hell that's what got you up?"
----
After you two got dressed and made your way downstairs for a deliciously cooked southern breakfast of ham, bacon, eggs, and some buttermilk toast, you got your boots on.
"Where are we going now babe, I thought we were going to spend time with your family."
"We are. But if we're gonna stay here, we're gonna help round the farm. Besides I gotta force ya to meet some other family members."
He huffed and started putting on his sneakers before you stopped him.
"Uh uh, darlin' you need workin boots, not those. Good thing I already bought ya a pair." You shove him some cowboy boots and he nearly laughs.
"You're fuckin joking me right?"
You stare at him with a dead serious glare, "We both need em if we're gonna be doin the work that needs ta get done babe."
"What the fuck are we doing that needs these fuckin things?" He shakes the boots in the air
"Oh you'll see, sugar. Now c'mon, Curly's waitin."
-----
You lead your frustrated boyfriend out to the pasture and honestly you could barely keep your eyes off of him. The steel toe boots you got him, some blue jeans, and Lord have mercy on that plaid shirt he had on. He was the spittin image of a country boy, but-
"Where the fuck are we going. Who the hell is Curly?"
His question was soon answered when he was toppled over by a horned goat.
"THERES MAH BOY" you patted the goat and it bleated happily to finally see you.
"A FUCKING GOAT?"
Curly took this as a challenge and attempted to ram into Katsuki again only to have a palm stop his head.
"Yeah Katsu, Curly's a boer goat. He was supposed ta be a meat goat but we all kinda got attached. He's got a fiery attitude just like ya too." You shove Katsuki teasingly and Curly saw an opening, he rammed at the back of Katsuki's knees causing him to fall over.
"You really gonna let a lil goat push you round like that?" Your boyfriend growled in response.
You pull him back on his feet as you coddle him "Now c'mon, you're gonna learn how to ride a horse Katsu."
----
"I take it you've never ridden a horse before?" You leaned against the fence watching him scan the pasture
"Show me the nearest horse in the city and I'll be more than happy to ride the fucker." He glared at your stupid question before going back to panning the meadow.
"Don't be like that Katsu, our horses are two sweethearts, I think you'll like em."
"Well I don't see them so I guess we're not riding today babe"
You grab him by his hand as you lead him to the barn to pick up a square of alfalfa.
"Now when they come barrelin down to get this don't be scared of em. They can sense fear and your fear will make them scared. Horses are very emotion sensitive animals, so that means no yellin neither." You break the square in half and give him one before walking back over to the metal gates.
He climbs up on the first rung of the fence and just looks at you smugly, "I don't think they, want to see us today Y/n, can't we just-"
You bang your heel on the gate causing the lock chains to jingle loudly.
You've rang the dinner bell.
You smirk at Katsuki's face when he hears the thundering of hooves. Sure he thought he knew you had horses but not monsters.
Two horses came sprinting to the gate, one Belgian Draft and one Clydesdale.
Bakugou was so entranced by their sheer power of them just running that he didn't even realize they were coming in hot.
The Belgian nearly charged at Katsuki causing him to flinch and nearly fly off the fence.
"HO, Waffle that's 'nough now you damn dummy, you both best be kind to poor Katuski here. Ya damn near scared 'im to death with yer eagerness. Katuski, mere."
Katuski dusted himself off and picked up his dropped alfalfa, "damn fuckin overgrown donkey."
"Katsu I need you to stick your hand out and let ole Waffle smell ya first, don't face directly at em neither, they're a pretty animal so ya gotta not act like a predator." You patted the Clydesdale's neck as it ate the alfalfa out of your hand.
"Tch, you're practically attacking that one's neck and you're telling me not to act like a predator?" He huffed.
Waffle huffed and took a step towards him as an attempt to scare off your boyfriend.
"Waffle Ho, stop bein spunky. Katuski don't let him walk over you like that, side step to him and extend your arm out, but keep it at a downward angle."
He groans and does what you tell him. The horse smells him and he can't help but feel a rush of excitement when he feels the horses powerful exhale on his skin.
"Heh, you big bastard." Katsuki slowly holds out the alfalfa half and offers it to the horse.
Waffle takes the bit gently from his hand and trots off with it to eat it in the grass.
Katuski has a smile on his face and an idea crosses your mind.
"Wanna ride him Katsu?"
----
You saddle up both horses on your own despite Katsuki offering to carry the saddles for you. He could really appreciate their size when the seemingly tiny saddle complimented their sheer amount of muscle.
"So, you'll ride Waffle, and I'll ride Hades. Do you need help gettin on em?" You tug a bit on Hades' saddle girth.
"Are you sure you aren't the one who needs help?" He smirks and starts to make his way over before you fling your foot in one of the stirrups with seemingly unknown flexibility.
You fling yourself over on top of the saddle seat with ease and gently plop down, shifting a bit before flashing him a grin.
You watch him struggle for a bit before pointing out the mounting block and he cusses at you a bit before finally getting on.
"Now, these boys are work horses so they listen to direction pretty well. If you need any help just let me know darlin." You click your tongue and Hades starts walking, his hoof fall echoing in the barn before stepping outside.
You turn him around to face the barn to look at a very confused yet impressed Katsuki.
"M-move." He gently nudges Waffle with his stirrups to no avail.
"Katsuki these are workin horses, they got iron sides. Just click your tongue twice and he'll move."
He clicks his tongue and nearly falls out of the saddle when Waffle takes his first step. Then his second. And third.
You can see the excitement on your city slicker boyfriend's face as he realizes the meaning behind the best seat in the world is in a saddle.
He takes some getting used to the commands like Ho and Woa, but he's a surprisingly quick learner.
----
You start your car to head back home. Katsuki fully enjoyed himself and you couldn't have asked for a more supportive boyfriend.
Before your car lurches forward your brother runs to the passenger side and slaps a cowboy hat on Bakugou. He acts like he hates it but he doesn't take it off.
You two take off to head back home before you see him roll up his sleeves up to his elbows and fix his hat.
"You embracin the cowboy life now Katsu?"
"Never, but I can see the charm in it." He smiles genuinely at you for a split second before, "you do act a lot like Curly, are you sure you ain't related to him?"
"Oh ha ha Kat- DIDJA JUST SAY 'AINT'"
"No I fuckin didn't."
"KATSUKI 'YEE HAW PUT EM UP' BAKUGOU HAH"
This was going to be long trip back home for him.
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suhoerections · 5 years ago
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OH MY GOD THIS BLOG TURNED 1 ON THE 21ST AND I FORGOT ASKDJFHASJKF BUT HAPPY BIRTHDAY SUHOERECTIONS AND EVERYONE WHO FOLLOWS I’M GONNA GO ON A RANT ABOUT MY MUTUALS UNDER THE READ MORE TAG OKAY BUT BASICALLY I LOVE ALL OF MY FOLLOWERS AND THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR MAKING THIS YEAR SO INCREDIBLE <3333
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also shout out to all my followers i’m not mutuals with but enjoy my content and reblog/like my work, I really appreciate yall, keep up the good work you’re all beautiful
okay this isn’t in any particular order i’m just going off who i remember and i’m trying to not miss anyone so if i do feel free to call me out and also i’m sorry if i don’t write as much for some people asdfjkhasd
@ninibears-erigom
okay look,,, you’re literally such an amazing person and the reason why i didn’t straight up deactivate in january like you helped me so much during that time and also through so much other stuff and I’m so thankful for you,, you’re one of the most realist and most amazing people I’ve ever met. I love you so much you’re literally the best mother i could have ever asked for like i want to squeeze the life out of you god. I seriously cannot express how much i love and appreciate you like?? I’m tearing up writing this because you’re literally one of the most amazing people to walk this Earth like??? and even though i’m a shit head and i spam you with ‘ayla’ 20 times just to tell you i did a good shit,,, you still love me?? also like you’re literally the reason i write???? that sounds so dumb but you’re seriously my muse,, i genuinely look upto you as a person because you’re so strong, wonderful, amazing, genuine, beautiful, sweet, caring, kind and that’s all i can think of off the top of my head. I love you so much and I have to cut this short cause i’m gonna feel bad cause i wrote so much asdkjfh but you’re amazing and i swear if you say otherwise i’ll eat all the lactose in the world (i cried writing this stfu) also you are nini’s cheek spreader :>> 
@thesoondongiefiles
You’re like?? my literal best friend?? and probably one of the best people i’ve met on this hell site,, i really don’t regret randomly messaging you “hey i need aussie friends” asdkjfh but fr i love you so much and you’ve been with me through thick and thin and i really appreciate it so much like you’re so amazing and kind and your art is actually so beautiful like you’re such an amazing person you don’t even know the start of it you dummy. I love how we can be ourselves around each other even though we haven’t known each other the longest but still, you’re my favorite soondongie and i love you so much man,, like we talk so much you’ve literally just become the older sister i never had and i really appreciate that like man idek what to write cause i just really appreciate you,, you’re just amazing and i love you very much and i hope we can meet one day cause you’re not that far away from me and i really love you ehehe 
@chanyeolol
KUKI MY FREAKING CHILD I LOVE YOU AND HELL YOU’RE SO AMAZING OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG idek kuks you’re just the best and you’re like the first mutual i made on this hellsite and damn you’re also like the best?? like i love how hyperactive you are you dummy you keep me on my toes and i love talking with you even if it takes me days to reply on instagram (sorry i’m barely active there askdjfh) but fr i love you very much and i really appreciate you and you’re so freaking BEAUTIFUL and i’ll bop you on the head if you say otherwise you dummy i love you
@letsmakeitforever
FUY MY GOD like i pray to you everyday smh i love you,,, like you’re amazing and cute and like you’re so NICE jesus christ i want to hug the shit out of you,, you’re sweet as fuck and istg you’re just great?? and i love that i can talk to you about sucking Jungkook’s dick cause like almost all my mutuals don’t stan bts so its nice to have an army friend,, i also really appreciate you and the support you’ve shown me and i always try and send you asks but i never know if they get through because my tumblr likes to fuck up but bottom line is i think you’re literally one of the most amazing people akjsdfha
@kyungseokie
OH BOY HERE COMES A TRAIN WRECK,, dia,, my child,, i love you very much and you always make me DIE with those freaking things where you just cut the conversation short and go “hey junmyeon would fuck you in a change room” LIKE JESUS CHRIST LET ME BREATHE but at the same time i sorta just drop like ksoo bombs as well so aksjdfhkj i guess its fair hehe but seriously!!! i love sharing ideas with you cause you’re literally so creative and you’re so amazing and have such a way with words like your writing is so magnificent no one can compare like you’re a poet with words akjsdfhkajs and you’re such a sweetheart too?? like i could write a whole ass page filled with positive words to describe you because you’re so beautiful and sweet and kind like gosH you’re such an amazing person i love you very much <33
@heonythighs
well howdy partner welcome to ram ranch askdfjhds gosh the horniest cowboy ever, 10/10 commentary, you’re amazing to converse with cause you’re just greaT and like idk you’re just super fun to talk to?? like i always laugh my ass off when we converse cause you’re a comedic genIUS i swear and you’re also the horniest chanyeol stan i’ve ever met oh god asdkfhasdkj but you’re jsut a really fun person and you’re also so amazing in general like fr fr your cowboy hat should have a label on it that says “i’m the best cowboy fuck all you bitches” like ugH i love you you’re so cool and just so chill i hope you have a fun time at ram ranch with your cowboys
@byunfirstlady
LAURE LOOK NOT TO PLAY FAVORITES BUT YOU’RE MY FAVORITE MUTUAL I LOVE YOU SO MUCH ASDKFJHAS like idek how to describe it but i could write so much about how much of an amazing person you are like you’re so cute and sweet and you always tag me in stuff (i need to tag you in more bbh adkjfh) but you’re such an artist like your work is so amazing!! i always feel so inspired by your work and it never fails to make me write!! you’re also the sweetest person on this site and your tags make me  c r y   like Laure you’re just so beautiful and sweet and i just combust because you’re so adorable,,, i want to hug you you’re so amazing and you’re so sweet ugh i could go on forever about this because you’re such a cutie i swear and you’re so fun to talk to as well like i really like discussing my fic ideas with you, especially the bbh series i’m writing askdjfh anyways i better stop before i take up a whole thing of why i love you so much you’re adorable <333
@flowerline8
ugh my number 1 nini stan !!!! i love writing nini stuff for you because you’re just so amazing and i love your tags they always make me smile,, you’re also adorable and funny to talk with and you’re also super beautiful ??? like i think its illegal how beautiful you are btw like its just the law,,, you’re under arrest for being too beautiful, sweet and kind. Like ugh Pauline you’re so sweet i want to hug you bc you’re so sweet but then again you’re so chaotic it makes me laugh adskfjhas like idek how to describe it but its so funny but fr fr you’re so sweet and you deserve everything <33
@fairyyeols
SIENNA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY OTHER MOTHER!!!!!!!!!!! gosh what a hoe i love you akdsfjhasjk you’re also too sweet like >:(( call me cute again i dare you like YOU’RE the cute one in this relationship smh,,, pcy agrees kdfak but ugh you’re just so nice i swear to the lord above god was making you in his little bowl and accidentally dropped all the sweetness in your mix cause you’re just so sweet omg,, like Enna you’re so amazing and your writing!!!! *chef kiss* exquisite just like you. You’re also hella funny??? like you’re sweet AND funny like that’s not fair, you’ve gotta have something else bad about you but no! cause guess what! YOU’RE ALSO SO BEAUTIFUL WTH!?!?! so you’re beautiful, literally the sweetest person alive, funny as and am an amazing author,,, like you’re too perfect for this world,,, you’re such an amazing person i hope you get everything you ever want <33
@multi-yeol
GRACE AKJDSFHKSJ i remember the first time we talked was such a mess jesus christ you’re so chaotic i love it and gosh you’re also so beautiful, funny and amazing?? like you’re gonna look at this and go ‘no i’m not’ but you are just saying asdkjf you’re so sweet and like a genuinely good person??????? like how can you be both that and super freaking beautfiul??? my tiny brain can’t comprehend your amazing-ness,, you deserve the whole freaking world you sweetheart asdfhkdh 
@cbxtual
Hope, my fellow weeb,,, we don’t talk as much but i do miss it! you’re funny and a great friend and i really miss all the times we’d say dumb shit with grace in the group chat aksjdfhak you’re also really funny and like?? idk you’re just great in general?? like your writing,,, god tier,,, your personality,,,, amazing,,, your looks,,,,, beautiful,,,, like Hope, you’re the full package man ugh and I HOPE you have a great time hehehe (sorry i couldn’t help myself) akdsjfhas but i’m still writing that yoongi fluff for you its just buried under all my other wips but i will get around to it adsfkjah
@naminalati
all i have to say is you’re the kindest person to ever exist and we haven’t talked much so i can’t really say a lot sorry but you’re just so kind and sweet?? like you’re the literal definition of a sweetheart and you’re the cutest person i’ve ever witnessed <33 I hope you have an amazing day because i really appreciate you and you’re just so amazing and beautiful and i have no idea how long you’ve been following me but you’ve been there for ages and i appreciate it 
@abunnycotton @khelmatic @yayitsjay @k-pop-trashx 
OKAY so i’ve never talked to any of yall but like !!!!! i see yalll in my activity a lot and i just want you to know that i really love and appreciate you all because you’re all beautiful sweethearts who deserve the world, thank you
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muselixer · 5 years ago
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ask meme - things my friends said ! ( volume four )
from October 2019 - December 2019 warnings: language, ns/fw themes, alcohol mentions, drug mentions change pronouns as needed! under the cut for your dashboard convenience
“That man took geometry.” “Have a blast, Freddy Krueger.” “Face God and walk backwards into the saltiest circle of Hell.” “Jerrypicking: You only pick guys named Jerry.” “I dab. Would you like to see?” “WE HAVE TO WAIT FOR THE GRAPES TO COOL.” “It’s hard to find scholarly sources on memes.” “Oh, prison!” “I retract my blep for twenty dollars.” “Nebraska’s not real.” “Don’t lick me, you criminal.” “My relationships are like Jeeps: unstable and changing with the slightest wind current.” “Listen, I’m a dumb bitch, you have to understand.” “It’s too late to leave at 10:30, so you HAVE to leave at 11 now.” “Damn, Japanese medicine is hardcore.” “Yeah, you do tend to piss a lot.” “Every wall seems fine, and then a fuckin’ Kyle shows up.” “Man, you put a microwave beat behind this, it’ll be sick.” “I was gonna say you look like Hagrid but a midget with a drinking problem, then I remember he already has a drinking problem.” “My sister? Kidnapped. Now I’m an edgy bitch.” “I’m not gonna take away your virgin roll.” “I wanna steal all the grapes and put ‘em in my room.” “Right, cabbage is poor people lettuce.” “Cabbage is like... non-trendy kale.” “You are like seven grapes.” “A melanin-American called me the gamer word in a Cabela’s.” “Bold new taste: RAM truck.” “Don’t wanna pay your bill? Just submerge it in ranch!” “Oh, Facebook. You diseased mother fucker.” “Hot take, Hitler was a brainlet.” “The Hobbit was a war crime.” “I just let fate decide and let the cream hit the back of my throat. It’s a strange experience.” “Look at me like I’m gay, not like I’m crazy.” “That’s a hot take, thank you.” “He’s not a homie.” “It’s like playing Marco Polo but the person you’re playing with has been dead for four years.” “It’s time to clock out of life.” “It’s illegal language Pokemon cards.” “Don’t fucking ask me questions, I’m stupid.” “If my name isn’t changed to ‘cheese boy’ in your phone, I’m gonna fucking riot.” “I didn’t expect the pen to go in so easy.” “Who needs heroin when you can dab?” “I’d say opioids are stronger than dabbing.” “Did you bring enough tiddy for everyone?” “So you’ll get his extra skin.” “You can’t kick me out! I’m already banned from Mattress Firm!” “Okay, but if I wasn’t ace, I’d be a total ho.” “Now, the urinal is a much harder concept.” “IF THE HUMANS DON’T LEAVE, THEY’LL RELEASE THE VAMPIRES TO THE PUBLIC.” “We are NOT about to lose a goliath to a fucking toilet.” “Stalin will steal your girlfriend.” “I was gonna say, my life is like a lamp, but you know, it never attracts anything good.” “I’m really good at SITTING and REACHING.” “It feels like a rabbit.” “We are CRACKHEADS, not dumbasses.” “I feel like Bruce Wayne, if Bruce Wayne was a twat.” “YOU MOTHERFUCKERS, YOU’RE SHITBAGGING ME.” “Tight. What’s a million dollars feel like?” “I’m not gonna pay reparations for your fucking potatoes.” “I don’t know what it is but it’s not marinara sauce.” “Do I look like a fucking panini to you?” “Oh, sorry, I’ve never played the mined crafts.” “I feel like a dried up red gel pen. Don’t ask me what that means.” “No real giraffes were harmed in the making of this painting.” “So violent, and over a triangle.” “You either die a monster or live long enough to become the monster fucker.” “YOU CAN PUT A RACCOON IN YOUR ASS!” “We had a fight club in the bathroom.” “Goals. Oh, I’m talking about something else. I also want my kneecaps shot out.” “HE GAVE HER A FREE PREGNANCY, AND HER PUSSY DIDN’T EVEN STRETCH!” “I can’t stop not breathing.” “Well then he’s not a school shooter, is he?” “If we’re both fuckin’ manic, who’s gonna keep track of what time it is?!” “I’m gonna go eat a pinecone.” “The lights said sit the fuck down.” “Oh, I just dabbed really hard.” “I have jaundice!” “I have your corn.” “Self care is yelling about your spiral, man. That’s it, that’s self care.” “I’M the offensive boy! I’M the one who doesn’t get invited to Christmas!” “I like my coffee crunchy.” “If my jokes don’t land, my hands sure fuckin’ will.” “There’s a vibe up in this bitch and I don’t know what it is but I feel it.” “Are you a pretzel? ARE YOU A FUCKING PRETZEL?” “THERE WAS A HUMAN IN THE SENTIENT TRASH CAN?!” “Okay, time to learn about this multiverse strip club.” “On behalf of cool people, LEARN THE DIFFERENCE.” “I like having feet.” “I’m gonna boycott life.” “I’m in the ‘it’s complicated’ phase with sleeping.” “And what happened to that? Now you can’t count.” “They’re called helmets because you’re met with hell when you put one on.” “Hold the fuck up, I’m putting everyone in buckets. Go the fuck to sleep.” “Oh, I’m gonna commit. ...A FELONY.” “I am but a fucking shit lawyer.” “Damn, people be posting.” “You are not fish! You are boy!” “I feel like... the tacos I ate earlier... are singing opera in my stomach.” “I’m gonna go bankrupt and it’ll be my own fault.” “Piss like a normal bitch.” “I might have a death wish, but I don’t have a blood kink.” “Go pee your pants before your mother does it for you.” “Please don’t fuck the slime. Please. Do not. Fuck. The slime. Thank you.” “I’ll seek therapy for my cursed furby images.” “Oh my god, tequila tastes like THAT? Shit.” “Papa John’s a single daddy now.” “Being a person supersedes being a skeleton.” “Y’know, y’know, it’s fine, because being a part of a cult is better than being a part of this family.” “No, no, okay, listen. You go to Red Lobster, ALONE. You turn to the waitress. And you say, ‘I will have the macaroni and cheese’.” “You’ve heard of elf on a shelf, now get ready for bitch in a ditch. It’s a picture of me, in a ditch.” “Oh dear god, when cockatiels are next to printers.” “OH MY GOD... I’M NEW BOOT GOOFIN’.” “I’m going out the way I went in: STRAPPED.”
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papa-rhys · 6 years ago
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Redemption - Distant: Pt 2 (Javier X Reader)
Note: Here it is, the second and final part of Distant. Enjoy!
Category: angst and fluff
Warnings: none
Word count: 3225
When the van der Linde gang finally dissipated 8 years ago, you’d figured you’d never see any of your brothers in arms again. You’d set off on your own after Beaver Hollow; leaving behind the painful, bitter end in search for a new beginning. But it would seem that God – in spite of everything he’d thrown at you in those years – was not happy with that ending after all. So he gave you one last chance at staying with your family. A chance that came in the form of the Marstons.
Of course, it hasn’t just been the Marstons that you’ve been living with these past few months. There’s also Charles Smith and to everyone’s misfortune – Uncle. You even see Sadie Adler from time to time; living, breathing proof that hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.
But there was one person in particular that God was seemingly not ready for you to give up on. Someone who you’d thought undeserving of another chance after all the ones you’d given him before.
Javier Escuella.
He’d approached you in Blackwater as you and Charles had shopped for groceries – an activity that may seem mundane and dull to the average person, but one that is a welcomed change of pace to someone who had spent so many miserable days under the thumb of Dutch and the many thousands of dollars that keeping his company had placed on your head.
You hadn’t believed Javier was real at first. He’d appeared to you so many times in the years since Beaver Hollow. He’d appeared in the reflection of shop windows, in the faces of strangers on the street, and the breeze had carried his name as whispers wherever you went with no escape from the torment. It took years for you to hear the strum of a guitar and not immediately associate it with him. He’d been running through your dreams each and every night, calling your name and leaving you to chase after him in panicked tears until you were ripped from your sleep by Charles or Abigail. The concern on their faces as they observed you shaking and sweating and sobbing never lessened in intensity. But neither did the dreams. Nor the gaping hole that Javier’s absence had left in your soul.
So then you could be excused for not believing that the familiar yet not familiar face of Javier was real, right? He didn’t seem to think so. He’d followed you out of that general store like a snarling wolf chasing down a whitetail and had you not felt the security from Charles’ presence, you’d have likely ran for the hills in a desperate attempt to get away from Javier; the man you’d once trusted with every aspect of your life. After all, the man he’d been in the days of Beaver Hollow was a frightening one, capable of frightening things. And who was to say he hadn’t sunk any lower since then? For all you knew, he’d come to Blackwater to kill you.
Reluctantly, John had allowed Javier to stay at Beecher's Hope with the rest of you. He was always one of the nicest of Dutch’s Boys – despite his outward behaviour being that of a rotten criminal – and he’d always had a soft spot for Javier; his former brother. Javier had promised to keep away from the group as much as possible, helping out around the ranch in exchange for shelter and the opportunity to make things right. But you weren’t sure. None of you were.
And so here you are. You walk into the Marstons’ barn and find yourself met with a troubling sight. Javier stands before a rearing stallion that seems to want Javier here just as little as everyone else does. Javier raises his hand in an attempt to soothe the stallion whilst holding a crate of empty bottles in the other hand. The whole situation is precarious to say the least and you watch it unfold before you with widened eyes.
“I guess I lost my touch,” Javier chuckles, stepping towards the stallion. “I haven’t had a stallion since Boaz – woah!” The horse rears again and crashes down with a thud before ramming open the gate of its pen, knocking Javier and his crate of empty bottles to the ground. It all happens in slow motion from where you’re stood – the gate crashing into the crate of bottles and the crate being shunted into the bridge of Javier’s nose – but despite the animosity you feel towards him and your promise to John to keep that horse looked after and stabled, you find yourself running straight to Javier’s aid and letting the stallion fly from the stable and into the open land outside.
“Jesus Christ, what are you doing?” you gasp, falling to your knees next to where Javier lays, pinching his nose with his fingers as it spews blood.
“I’m fine, I’m fine,” he assures you, sitting upright. “Unlike those bottles.” He begins chuckling as he gazes at the smashed bottles and you breathe a sigh of relief and quietly thank the heavens that he’s okay.
“You’re gonna get yourself killed one of these days,” you giggle, pulling his hand away from his nose and using his chin to angle him so as to get a better look of his injury. It takes a few moments for you to realise who you’re talking to and that crushing feeling you’d felt so many times in that damn dirty cave returns; your laughter trailing off as your face drops. “You should be more careful,” you tell him, coldly enough to bring about a chill. You climb to your feet and head for the barn door, leaving Javier on the floor, using the back of his hand to smear blood across his face.
“Y/N, wait, we should talk,” he calls after you. “Just talk to me… please… mi amor –“
“Don’t,” you spit, whipping around on your heels and pointing your finger at him; your cheeks burning as hot as your glare. “Don’t call me that.”
There was a time in Beaver Hollow where you longed for him to speak those words to you, but now, it’s more of an insult than a term of endearment. You are not his love. You haven’t been for many years. And to hear those words in reference to you now, after everything, is nothing short of agonising. So many words had left his lips in the last few months you’d spent together in that wretched camp – some of them bitter, some of them cruel, some of them cold. But none of them loving. And you’re not sure if the loving Javier is welcomed anymore. He’d had his chance to change back to that, time and time again. You waited and waited and waited and he never did. You’d since learned to live with the idea that the man you’d loved had perhaps died in Guarma. And now he’s decided you’re worth changing for?
“I’m sorry,” he says, raising his hands in a display of surrender. “It’s just habit.”
Just like that, the yearning feeling that you’ve felt for him every day since you’d met him has returned. That nasty, troublesome feeling that whirls in your chest and travels down the length of your arms. The desire to rush forward and throw your arms around him as he climbs to his feet is so overwhelming that it’s physically painful and you find your arms twitching as you think of what it would feel like to hold him within them once more. He stands at the other end of this barn – smartly dressed and smiling apologetically with blood trickling over his lips and dripping from his chin – and you don’t think you’ve ever wanted him so desperately.
“Yeah, well unlearn that habit,” you tell him angrily before leaving the barn.
You storm across the field outside with your hand covering your mouth, holding in sobs of agony that linger in your throat, waiting for their chance to escape. You rush up the front steps of the house and push your way in and as you freely allow the tears to fall – every inch of your abdomen aching as the sadness consumes you – you can’t help but think you’d have been better off chasing after the stallion.
It's dawn and you’ve long since risen and made your way out to the fence that marks the boundary of Beecher’s Hope, where the sun rises fast over the hills and bathes the ranch in a golden glow.
You’ve been avoiding Javier completely for the last few days – the incident in the barn being something to add the the long list of things you don’t want to repeat. It’s been a lot easier to avoid him than you thought it would be – physically at least. There’s a lot of land here to spread your self across and between running errands in Blackwater, tending to the horses, and dealing with The Skinner Brothers, you’ve found yourself too preoccupied to even bump into Javier in passing. Not for lack of trying on his part though, of course. If you weren’t still feeling the sting of the scars he’d left on the soft tissue inside your rib cage, you’d find it endearing; the way he gazes longingly at you from across the field as he carries bales of hay or the way he watches you with a smile as you laugh and joke with Charles. You suppose there’s something to be found in the fact that he’s so happy to see you enjoying yourself, even without him being a part of it. After all, he’d been so disinterested in your happiness 8 years ago, so that small subconscious smile that you’d caught him with as he watched you enjoy time around the campfire is a marked change from the man before.
You lean forward against the fence, watching the sun rise towards its position high above the earth and as you breathe in the fresh morning air, the dried grass crunches underneath carefully trodden footsteps behind you. You know who it is, but you look over your shoulder at him anyway.
“You used to like sunrises,” you state as Javier stands next to you and puts his foot up on the lower rung of the fence.
“So did you,” he says softly.
“Only because you did.” You take a beat. “You still like ‘em?” you ask him.
He nods his head, looking forward at the orange haze that creeps over the hills as the morning fog catches the light of the sun and carries it. “Yes,” he answers. “I came out here to watch it. I didn’t expect you to be here.”
“Well, here I am,” you tell him, keeping your eyes fixed on the sunrise ahead of you.
“Here you are,” Javier echoes.
The moment’s pass – one after the other ticking by as the two of you stand in the most comfortable silence you’ve had with him in a long time. He’s stood close to you and you can feel his aura filling the small space between the two of you and you can’t stop your mind from wandering down the all-too-familiar path of dangerous thoughts; all regarding Javier. The ideas of him lining each side of the path and pricking you with their thorns each time you’re naïve enough to reach out to them. You know this path has never lead you anywhere else other than the dead end of heartbreak and desperation, but again and again, you travel the length of it and end up neck deep in the pain that waits for you at the end.
You can feel his warmth radiating from him and it stirs up all kinds of feelings within you that you’re growing so tired of fighting against.
“You must know that I didn’t want any of it,” Javier states, his voice plucking you from your imagination as always.
“Any of what?” you ask him, turning your head to look at him and holding him in your gaze for longer than you have since his return.
“The arguments, the fighting. All the bitterness between everyone. That’s not what I wanted. I don’t know, maybe I know now, – in hindsight – that it’s what Micah wanted. But me… I wanted… well…” he sighs.
“What did you want?” you prompt him quietly; part of you hoping that it was too quiet for him to hear and that you won’t have to hear the answer to a question that you’re afraid of.
“I wanted things to stay the same as they were before things got crazy. I wanted my family to stay together and I wanted to keep hoping that Dutch would get us out of it, like he always had. I guess at the end of the day, I wanted us all to be happy and I was scared because a part of me – deep down inside myself – knew that we wouldn’t be.”
“And are we happy now?” you ask.
“I don’t know,” he shrugs, turning his head to meet your gaze. “You tell me.”
You falter, bowing your head involuntarily for just a moment. Because as much as you so desperately want to tell him all the ways in which he’s making you feel right now – the way he completely and utterly owns every part of you – you don’t know how to answer his question. You don’t know if you’re happy and you don’t know if any of you ever were, nor if you ever will be. You look out upon this ranch with it’s open fields and picket fence and you’re unsure of how long it will last. If the Marstons or Charles or Uncle or you will ever find the peace and quiet that you’re hoping for. But you do know that Javier – despite every bitter word and uncaring fuck in that God-forsaken hellhole of a cave – to this day, makes you feel okay. And maybe after the lives that the two of you have lived. After all the misery and death and depravity. Well, maybe okay is enough.
The silence you give Javier might be an answer in and of itself, but he doesn’t seem to mind it. The sun has almost fully risen and the sky is no longer orange; instead sporting a soft blue colour that compliments the yellow tones of the sun. Javier gently places his hand over the top of yours as you hold onto the fence and you turn your palm upwards, gazing at his hand as you allow him to interlock his fingers with yours. You both look down at your hands, watching them as though they have a mind of their own as they twist and turn and caress each other’s fingertips. His hand is warm and dry and callused and feels exactly the same as you remember it and you wonder if Javier is remembering you in the same way that you’re remembering him.
Then you have your answer.
He tugs at your hand and you find yourself moving with him as he pulls you into a long-awaited hug. 8 years worth of hatred, guilt, sorrow, tension, grief – all melt away under his embrace and he holds you tightly, stroking your hair softly as you cry into his shoulder. He tucks his chin in and plants a kiss on your neck before pulling away and using his thumbs to wipe your tears away.
“I’m sorry,” he tells you with the utmost sincerity in his glossy brown eyes as he cups your face.
“I know, you sniffle.”
“I was such a damn fool.”
“I know that, too,” you smile, your eyes still blurry with tears.
“Ay,” he chuckles, pulling you back in against his chest. “You always were the most honest of us, mi amor,” he says, kissing the top of your head.
Bonus:
You wake peacefully in the arms of Javier, your naked bodies tangled in the sheets that the two of you had laid across the floor of the barn. Last night was the first night you’d spent together in years – the first happy on in even longer – and you wake up this morning feeling complete again and having had an entire night free from the tormenting shadows that usually dance around the forefront of your mind.
Javier is already awake when you lift your head up to look at him – your hand resting on his bare chest and rising and falling with each of his smooth, relaxed breaths.
“You slept well,” he says with a yawn.
“Did you?”
“No.” He smiles down at you and you tilt your head in confusion as to why he’d be happy about such a thing.
“Why not?” you ask, watching him through blurry eyes; your eyelids weighed down with sleepy.
“I spent most of the night looking at you,” he confesses, tracing his fingertips in circles on the skin of your shoulder as he holds you tight. “I got it into my head that none of this was real,” he explains. “Or that you’d disappear if I closed my eyes for too long.”
You push yourself up onto your hands and plant a delicate kiss onto his cheek. “Does that feel real enough?” you smile before following it with a kiss to his lips. “What about that one?”
You deliver kiss after kiss until Javier can’t take it anymore, pushing you away with a soft chuckle. “Si, you were always good at waking me up in the morning.”
“Yeah, except your face was never the part of you that I had my lips pressed to.”
“No, it wasn’t,” he grins.
“I’m glad you found me,” you tell him, turning the light, easy atmosphere into a more sincere but no less content one.
“Me too,” he agrees. “I was looking for you all those years, you know. Since the standoff at Beaver Hollow. I had a few leads for a while, but they turned out to be nothing. I didn’t think I’d find you, but I kept looking.” He pushes some hair out of your face and his fingertips trail gently down the side of your face; following your jawline until they reach your chin. “I thought you were gone,” he says quietly. “I thought I’d gone and messed everything up, irreparably.”
You lean into his touch, looking at him through soft, adoring eyes as he drags the pad of his thumb across your lower lip. You don’t say a word to him – there’s nothing left to be said – instead, you lay your head down on his chest and enjoy the moment. Nothing matters to you more than this and you want him to know that.
You have loved this man so dearly and unwaveringly from the day you met him and every day after that until this one. The things he did and said 8 years ago don’t hold any weight anymore and the more you think about the years between then and now, the less you care about them. You’d been stuck in Beaver Hollow for all of these years, replaying that era over and over again because a part of you had hoped that you might get a different outcome. Well, here it is. Your happy ending.
You’d once said to yourself that you could stay with Javier for eternity if the universe would allow it. And now – with the morning sun filtering through the cracks in the barn door and nothing else to do but enjoy this very moment – you can.
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porkchop-ao3 · 6 years ago
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Questions!
Thank you @rixxy8173571m3w1p3 for tagging me :)
1. Nickname: my mum calls me Lol, or Lollipop, that's probably the closest thing I have to a nickname :P I'm called Em by my family a lot too, a shortened version of my actual name :)
2. Zodiac Sign: I'm a leo, roar!
3. Height: I think about 5,4”???
4. Hogwarts house: not a clue, I'm not into Harry Potter :P
5. Last thing I googled: 70s fashion, for a drawing I'm doing :)
6.Favourite musician: damn this question. This changes all the time. Right now I'm loving Hot Chocolate and Hall and Oates! An all time favourite is Pink Floyd, I grew up with them thanks to my dad :)
7. Song stuck in my head: now that I've thought about it, Hot Chocolates “You Sexy Thing” :P
8. Following: 292
9. Followers: 438
10. Do I get asks?: Not as nearly as many as I used to when I took requests haha
11. Amount of sleep: I usually get about 7 hours when I'm at uni
12. Lucky Number: I don't really have one.
13. What are you wearing?: I'm currently wearing some comfy shorts coz it's really warm today, and a flesh curtains t-shirt I got for Christmas :)
14. Dream job: hhhhhhhhh don't ask me this, I don't know and it stresses me. Something that involves working on creative elements of games/animated film/TV/comic books/etc that other people will love as much as I love things like RAM
15. Dream trip: I want to go to LA one day, thanks to GTAV!
16. Favourite food: Hmmm.. probably the chicken and bacon ranch melt on Italian herbs and cheese bread from subway. Idk, I love a good sandwich 👌also anything with cheese and garlic is good for me!
17. Instruments: none at all! My hands don't work like that haha
18. Languages: English and some Spanish, I've been learning for like a year on Duolingo, I currently have a 239 day streak 😎
19. Favourite song: an all time favourite is Pink Floyd's “Wish You Were Here”. I listen to that song and it makes me feel so fuzzy and nostalgic, like I'm on the way to the seaside in my dad's car :)
20. Random fact: I'm currently playing red dead redemption 2 and I'm loving it 👍
21. Aesthetic: crystals, cactus plants, animal skulls, fur, busy patterns, warm autumnal colours and messy paint palettes!
I'm not going to tag anyone because anyone I would've tagged already has been :) but feel free to do this if you want to share some more about yourself!
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adampage · 6 years ago
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Oh, Arthur.
Part 1: Nothing Else Matters (link to ao3 if it’s easier to read there)
Pairing: John Marston/Abigail Roberts (mention), John Marston/Arthur Morgan
Word Count: 2402
Warnings: *Don’t read if you haven’t finished the game. Seriously.*
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Author’s Note: This b*tch loves happy endings. I’m still catching feelings for Arthur Morgan and I’m not the only one. Part 1 is angsty, but the next few parts will be comfort (and possibly smut? idk yet). Stay tuned.
***
John hadn’t seen Arthur in nearly a decade. The last time he’d seen him, he was running away from Dutch and Micah, tripping his way over stones and dirt on a bloody mountainside. The Pinkertons were right on their tail, too, and Arthur had stayed behind to give John and his family a chance at survival. It ached John to the core to leave him, the way he had, but Arthur hadn’t really given him much of a choice. He was a stubborn old fool if John had ever met one, and it only made sense that he was, given the kind of men that he’d been raised by.
It was difficult to tell which gunshot of the many he’d heard echo throughout the hills was the one that got him, but he remembered one in particular that sounded so terrifying John tripped over his boots and fell to the ground, a cry of frustration preceding the tears that sprang from his eyes, as his heart skipped a beat when he knew. He knew, and there wasn’t a goddamned thing he could do about it now. Arthur was gone, and he’d never come back.
John coughed up bile in the bushes, pang of misery convulsing through him from the battle he’d gone through hours before, on the train. The anxiety bubbling did nothing to help matters, and it took him several moments to calm himself. He thought of Abigail, of Jack...they were waiting on him in Annesburg, with Mrs. Adler protecting them. He knew how wild she could be, and reckless. He only hoped she kept them safe until he got there.
“John, you sorry son of a bitch,” he huffed out, struggling to stand up in his grief and agony, the sound of Pinkerton horses rumbling beneath his feet, “this ain’t no time to be a weak bastard.”
He wandered through the trees, hiding when necessary from men on horseback John knew he couldn’t outrun. He walked all the way down the mountain, until he caught sight of the yellow gaslights hanging from the wooden buildings of Annesburg. Hiding in the shadows from any officials roaming about, he found the house that Arthur told him his family was hiding in. Sadie opened the door with a cocked gun at his face and a knife to his groin.
“Mrs. Adler, always a pleasure,” John groaned.
“John!” Abigail cried from behind her, rushing past the other woman and pulling him into her arms. “John, you’re alive!”
He didn’t have time to register any other words being spoken, before everything went dark.
***
“Wake up, you scarred fool.”
“Leave me be.”
“Oh, so it’s gonna be like that, huh? I always knew you were a lazy sod.”
“Shut up!”
“I’ll be quiet when you learn to wake up before the sun rises.”
“It’s no wonder nobody likes you,” John grunted, eyes flying open to find Arthur dropping his hat on his face.
“Does it look like your opinions matter to me, John Marston? Now wake the hell up before I make sure you never wake up again.”
“Always with the threats,” John’s feet touched the grass as he willed himself awake, “You ever try bein’ nice to people?”
“Last time I was nice to somebody I ended up in jail.”
“That doesn’t say much, considerin’ we’re always runnin’ from the law.”
Arthur whistled for his horse, patting her gently when she trotted over obediently. “Now, that’s a good girl.”
“Ah, still probably ain’t worth it to be nice to you.” Arthur whistled for his horse, patting her gently when she trotted over obediently. “Now, that’s a good girl.”
John sighed as he put his boots on, then put on his dark overcoat. He walked over to his own horse, pulling a carrot out of his coat and feeding the animal. “Oh, what a good girl.”
“You mocking me, Johnny boy?”
John instantly saw red, but kept his emotions in check long enough to mount his horse and follow Arthur to his destination, wherever the hell that was. The truth was, he never knew where he stood with Arthur. One minute, they were like best friends, working together - protecting each other - completely on the same page. And the next, he was listening to Arthur’s incessant poking and prodding, pinpointing all the little things about John that John couldn’t stand about himself. He couldn’t get a read on him sometimes, and it was beginning to drive him nuts. He’d think that after twenty years of Arthur’s bullcrap, he’d be used to it by now.
Maybe he was just a weak son of a bitch.
Or maybe, he was just sensitive to Arthur’s provocations because he longed for his approval. He’d been the apple of Dutch’s eye since they found him, but even as a kid he knew he wasn’t Dutch’s first son. The golden boy, at least to John, was Arthur. And Arthur was the one he always wanted to impress. As a child, he sought the approval of the older boy by following him around everywhere, wanting to learn everything that Arthur could do, just like him. As an older man now, he just wanted his respect. So he did as he was told. Hell, he thought, he’d probably die for Arthur ten times over, if it meant that Arthur would see him as an equal.
But it felt like Arthur always kept his respect a feather out of reach.
“You’re awfully quiet back there. The wolves get your tongue, too?”
“Why are you always screwin’ with me, Morgan? Don’t you have anything better to do? Why do you always call me for help on a job when it seems like you can’t even stand me half the time? Why don’t you get Charles, or-or Lenny to-”
“Shut your goddamn mouth, John, we’re here.” Arthur dismounted his horse, setting it at a picket just outside of Valentine. The sun was rising above the trees, painting the sky in gorgeous pink and orange hues. John settled his horse beside Arthur’s and leaned against the nearest tree, wondering what in the hell this was all about.
They sat in silence for a few minutes, John picking at the grass bordering the tree. He should have taken comfort in the refreshing breeze blowing through the town, but his stomach was full of anxiety. He knew Arthur had reasons for doing the things he did, so he didn’t like to ask more than once. But Arthur was silent, and it was beginning to rub him the wrong way.
Just before John opened his mouth, Arthur stirred, picking himself up. “They’re here.”
“Who’s here?” John asked, already irritated at Arthur’s silence up until this point.
“The book wagon, John. The book wagon.” Sure enough, John heard the faint sound of clopping hooves on dirt road, the wagon coming into view.
John scowled. “Book wagon? You woke me up before sunrise so we could rob a book wagon?”
“Not rob it, you dumb bastard.” Arthur scoffed. “It’s for the kid, John. For Jack.”
“There you go, pretending to be his father again,” John quipped, “You sure the kid ain’t yours?”
John was held up by the lapels of his coat and slammed against the tree before he could even speak another word. Arthur’s eyes were bright with anger, his jaw clenched tight beneath his cowboy hat. Though John feared for his life in that moment, he couldn’t help but notice just how picturesque Arthur looked. It was damn near distracting, in a moment where he should have been completely focused on finding a way to tame the man’s wrath.
“I’m gettin’ real tired of you runnin’ your mouth, boy. The fact of the matter is, I wouldn’t have anything to do with the kid if you’d just man up. Even if he weren’t yours -hell, even if the kid was mine- you love Abigail, don’t you?”
John struggled to speak. “Y-yeah, I do.” He gasped.
“Then what the hell are we even talkin’ about this for? Do right by her son, and you do right by her. Don’t make me have to say this again.” Arthur set John down, mounting back on his horse and heading towards the book wagon. “Reasons as to why I brought you along was so you could take the credit. You think I want your kid likin’ me more ‘n he likes you?”
John swallowed, feeling like a real piece of shit. All Arthur ever did was try to help him be better, and John was always second-guessing his intentions. It was wrong, and unfair. But he could never tell Arthur that.
“What kind of books should we get him?”
Arthur smiled at him, and it damn near took John’s breath away. “I was hopin’ you could tell me.”
***
“Anything else you need from town, sir?”
“Nothin’ you could buy me in a store, son. You be careful.”
“I will.”
“You sure you don’t wanna take Uncle with you? I sure would appreciate it.”
“Ah, I don’t think that’d be a good idea, sir. What if he gets into a fight at the saloon?”
“I guess you’re right, Jack. Well, I tried.” John shrugged, patted the horses, made sure they were hitched correctly to the wagon. “Go on.”
“I’ll see you in a couple hours, sir.”
“Good luck.”
John watched his son drive away, hoping to whoever was up in the sky that his son would make it back home safe. It was the first time since Abigail left that he felt at ease enough to let Jack go anywhere by himself. Truth be told, he was afraid. Afraid that Jack would leave one day and never come back. Just like Abigail. Just like the gang. Just like...Arthur.
“Where’s the kid?” Uncle grunted, taking a swig from his bottle.
“None of your damn business. Now come help me with the herd, would ya? I’m sick of you not earnin’ your keep around here.”
“Now wait just a minute-”
Goddamn, John rolled his eyes. He won’t shut up the rest of the morning. This is what I get for antagonizing the man. “You know what, Uncle? You go ahead and rest. I’ll be fine by myself.”
“Well,” Uncle grinned. “If you insist.”
“Oh, I insist.”
“All right then, Marston.”
John spent the whole morning out on the ranch, repairing his fence where one of the more belligerent bulls had rammed through. After finishing with that, he took a small break under the shade of the tree that looked over Abigail’s garden, wondering where in the hell his life went wrong. He thought Abigail was happy all these years, slavin’ away by his side, watching their little ranch grow into something respectable.
Must not have been good enough.
He sighed quietly to himself. Oddly, her leaving didn’t feel like the end of the world. When she packed up and left, it was just the icing on the cake of a life he screwed up all on his own. It was the last consequence in a series of consequences that were well deserved, from what he could tell.
Oh, Arthur. If you could see me now. Some life you saved.
Arthur Morgan. The only person in his life who didn’t leave out of selfishness. Quite the opposite, really.
John’s nose flared, his body unable to handle reliving old memories. Thinking about Arthur only made him into a mess. In all these years, he’d found and reacquainted himself with all of his friends. Charles and Uncle helped him build the ranch from the ground up, when it was just some backwater piece of crap halfway between Strawberry and Blackwater. Sadie helped him find work (of dubious means), and he even found Mr. Pearson working in Rhodes when he had to deliver a bounty there one day. He spent the night at his house, and even had some of Pearson’s famous beef stew. He definitely didn’t miss it one bit. Lenny he heard was up north, had started a good life with Tilly Jackson. They were partners and owners of a hotel and saloon. Mary Beth, he found working in a law office as some sort of secretary clerk. She told him she was thinking of writing a book about their adventures.
Adventures. Made it sound like they were heroes on a journey. He scoffed. Dutch sure thought that’s what they were. “Dutch weren’t no hero,” he whispered to himself. “And neither am I.” But Arthur was.
All these years, he managed to find all of the friends he had left.
Except Arthur.
And he wasn’t going to.
***
John woke to the sound of Jack approaching in the wagon. He wiped the sleep off his face, disgusted to find that his hands were covered in dirt from sleeping underneath a tree outside. Wiping his hands off on his work pants, he met Jack in front of the house, surprised to find him not alone.
“Hey, pop,” Jack embraced him. John was surprised at the greeting, his son not being one to hug often, or have any physical contact with anyone. He was a quiet kid. But John was weary of the man moving quietly in the shadows of the wagon. “You’ll never guess who I found.”
“Yeah? Who is it?”
“Johnny Marston.”
John’s face went white and his fingers went numb, a cold shiver roaming up his spine. The broad-shouldered man dressed all in black had his face hidden beneath his hat, but he knew that smirk. That stubbled jawline. The leaning of his body, and the hand at his belt buckle. And it nearly swept John off his damn feet.
“Arthur.”
“Come here, you dumb bastard.” He pulled John into a tight hug, and for the first time in a long time John felt like he didn’t have to watch over his shoulder, like he didn’t have to worry about every little thing, like everything that ever mattered in this world was right here, standing in front of him. And yet… he had to know. He had to know how. But first, he was going to revel in the feeling of Arthur’s warmth, his tender embrace absolutely bein’ the thing he needed in this moment.
When Arthur pulled away, he gave John a look like he was waiting on John to say something. Anything. John cleared his throat, realizing he had to play the part of man-of-the-house. “You want to come in?”
Arthur bit his lip, eyes bright with an emotion John couldn’t figure out. “Sure.”
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