#like bffr if im breaking down to rubberneckers my ass is NOT going to make it through keep you down or god forbid age difference
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i love christian lee hutson so unbelievably much but his music makes me so suicidal ive fully had to stop listening to him
#i literally sob every time i hear one of his songs that isnt like. get the old band back together#i wrote rubberneckers to finish off that sentence and deleted it bc even rubberneckers makes me cry#it’s bc im getting better#before i started my current antidepressants he was one of my top artists#i would still listen to him every single day of my life if i could but im not mentally strong enough for that#like bffr if im breaking down to rubberneckers my ass is NOT going to make it through keep you down or god forbid age difference#i get so sad whenever i think about it bc i love him and his music and artistry more than i could ever comprehend#but i turn into a sobbing wreck whenever i listen to any of his songs and then feel existential for hours afterwards#so for the sake of my own mental wellbeing i try not to listen to him as much anymore#no other artist does this to me not even phoebe or conan#it’s a curse truly#christian lee hutson i love you#and i don’t want you to change even if it means i cannot listen to a single thing you sing#will just resign myself to occasional listening parties whenever something big and emotional happens in my life like tonight#the most underrated artist in existence#if clh has 0 fans then i am dead#christian lee hutson#tilda rambling
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