#like I HATE HATE HATE when ppl are like ‘well the natives did bad things too 🤬’ but like we were doing asoiaf shit to each other back then

[barbreypilled]

remember when that one asoiaf race discourse was happening recently and that one silly sausage in the notes was like ‘obviously because it’s a feudal society they have to be white because feudalism is Bad so it is a White People Thing’. lol. lmao even. ijbol mayhaps

[nfumbewalk]

Busy Critter! 💀

Three aspects of Santa Muerte, taken some time ago.

I'm a busy critter today. And I found out wonderful news! The steelhead fishies are coming back! The Native Americans told folks long ago to bust up a dam that was killing the steelhead population and they finally listened!! Yay! 😊 I love fish and hate ppl who mess with them. Still wanna be a fish doctor. Lol! Well, seriously, I would totally be an Ichthyologist and yes, I knew how to spell it. Geek! I'm a Chinook salmon lover. 💖 Yes, I eat them. Its the cycle of life.

Anyway, writing stuff today. I'm coming up with my own card set for divination. Very very simple. A kid could draw the images for me cos I cannot. The meanings are soooo easy. I've come up with 32 cards, well, there's numbers 1-10, then 22 picture cards. Reminds me of Lenormand cards but I'm trying not to mimic them. When ready, I'll get the blank cards from Amazon.

I don't know where the idea came from, but come to think of it, I was thinking of Rodolfo and he fluttered in recognition. So I think he inspired me. Especially because there's two "Muerto" cards. His presence has been really strong lately. He says this is the time of year that he had his accident. When he was In the military - he mangled his right hand. Guess it was bad enough to get discharged because he couldn't work his job. He says he nearly lost two fingers. I haven't seen his hand yet. Scared to! I'm not weak, I just hate to think or see that he got hurt. My empathy goes nutters.

Today i saw a real good edge of *white* freaking hair on my head! I wasn't quite ready for that. Who is? 😅 Gen X getting old! Though my husband has an almost white beard and tendrils of white in his dirty blonde hair. All MY fault!! Lol! He's five years my senior but fuck, I know that dealing with my shit aged him. Funny thing is that it took my dad forever to go grey and even at the time of his death, he still had a lot of black hair and under his beard??!!

He barely aged!! He looked like a much younger man, not a 74 year old. I really was floored. My family ages pretty good but we don't live that long. Its my dad's side, I think the Native American genes, because they age quite well. Ojibwe or Cree, not sure, but I lean toward Ojibwe more. Some ppl say I look Native, but I don't know. When i part my hair and put two braids in, yeah, I do. But I thought I heard Grandpa Ben say we were Cree. I'd love to know, but my family doesn't talk. We just don't. Its the generational gap.

Anyway, its just funny how all of this stuff I'm doing is coming together and I don't need a soul to teach me anything or initiate me! Ha! I think this is what my old Tata Antonio was alluding to years ago. He did tell me that I didn't need anyone. That I already had it in me. And he came to me recently and said he was really proud of what I was doing with Muerteria. Hmm. Yep, its all making sense now. Think I've been in the dark for a bit! 😂 Antonio said that I didn't need initiation. OMG. I'm so dumb.

I have been torturing myself for years. Don't need any of it! I don't need to ever wear white again!!! Yes! Woot! I'll only put it on my head for cleansings, that's it! I love white, just not clothing. 😆 i exclusively use white candles. Lol.

Sooo...I'm working on my Etsy shop. Not plugging it. I'm not even putting a link. Trying to figure out what sells. I put up a special Muerteria tarot reading. Hope it gets views. I updated all of my ads. I'm really just charging the most for the rituals because they are expensive to do and maintain for a month, some are shorter.

My Mama Chola Wealth ritual is the most money because I have to go to the river weekly and float an offering upstream. Plus her other offering is not appealing, and I also have to go outdoors for it and leave it by a tree. Palo "deities" or rather mpungo, like their offerings in nature. I remember going to the Siuslaw Nat'l Forest and leaving a steak for Zarabanda. That was definitely received! Even my husband Tom could feel it. It was like Zarabanda "shook" the land, almost felt like an earthquake.

I'm just trying to offer things that ppl are going to be interested in and can benefit from. I'm not into offering outlandish shit for a thousand dollars and then give no physical item? What's up with that? WTF is a chi ball anyway???!! That sounds New Age and fake. Ppl "give" those "chi balls" out a lot. How fucking dumb. I would want a real tactile item. I've done just digital rituals and I felt terrible. I'm no longer doing those. Readings, yes. Rituals, no. There are TONS of frauds on Etsy. Its Snake Oil version 2024! Utter fakes on Etsy - the lot of them. If someone says they can spiritually cleanse you without being WITH you - fraud! Run away!

Sorry but I'm old school. Before the internet. I learned magic from paper. Something called a book. The internet is full of trash information. Learn discernment before attempting to learn online. It doesn't hurt to read a book. Try a book more than 30 years old. Most of my good books are more than 50-60 years old. Old info? Not really because modern books just steal from my favorite old books! 😂 And flagrantly, without citing their sources.

There is a great book with tons of information. Its not horribly rare. Amazon can hook you up. "A Treasury of Witchcraft," by Harry Wedeck. Fun book if you really know what you are doing. Really useless if you don't. Hardcovers are spendy. My hardcover was under $10. This book is my go to for old effective spells.

You will find with old books that they are not politically correct, not inclusive and not sensitive to a lot of our issues of today. If that bothers you, avoid all books before 1980. Not saying that the 80's were good. But there were vast improvements. I know. Because. I've. Read. A LOT. Of books. 😉 I can give horrid examples of insensitive language that ppl used to use. But I just don't care myself. I care for others though, and that counts.

To end this old wind bags post? No beer until after noon o'clock. My mom's rule. Grandma popped her cap off at 10 AM. 😂 Sad but true.

M.M. 💖💀💖

[thatweirdtranny]

what does it mean to be an American to you? what does your perfect america look like?

i don’t really have a concept of a perfect america or what it is to be an american beyond “person who lives in the usa” but i’ll give it a shot.

what it is to be an ideal american:

open to new ideas and different perspectives, we are a huge and diverse nation that’s honestly incredibly polarized at the moment politically and my favorite flavor of fellow citizen is one who can disagree while still respecting the other side

understanding of different cultural backgrounds because most of us come from immigrant backgrounds at some point (obviously excluding ppl who are first nations), we are a melting pot culture

progressive, always looking to the future while remembering/honoring the past, we have a relatively short history as a country compared to many but we’re a people who are always looking for new possibilities while remembering both the good and bad parts of our past (good would be our dedication to innovation, bad would be…. well that’s a long list, this country has fucked up a lot)

caring about human rights, equality/equity, most of us are descended from people who came to america to escape something going on in our ancestors’ home countries so i believe it’s our job to create a society where we don’t have to worry about oppression no matter where it comes from

cares about the land and its history — what did your area look like before european settlers colonized it? who lived there and what was their language/culture/general mode of existing? was the land taken care of or maintained a certain way by the local tribes/nations before it was colonized?

what is my idea of a perfect america:

native communities have the resources they need to live happy healthy lives in their homelands, with their languages maintained and the land maintained the way it has been historically and with science in mind (controlled burns, cultivated forests and natural habitat intermixed with holistically farmed land, wildlife corridors, etc)

education is entirely secular and well funded so that people don’t need to resort to private schools to educate their kids well

less funding for the military generally speaking, redirect those funds towards socialized healthcare and higher education

less funding for police, redirect that funding towards community services

in fact completely overhaul the police system, require psychological evals to root out the bullies and corrupt people, give them a minimum of 2-4 years of schooling specifically for law enforcement, require unconscious bias training, and make it so that every lawsuit for police misconduct comes out of the police’s pension funds

NO MORE ELECTORAL COLLEGE, implement ranked choice voting, do anything to end the two party system

progressive tax, better labor laws, let’s make america the land of people who don’t have to exist from paycheck to paycheck like most of us do now

restoration of native habitats and species. when there’s 20 million bison roaming the plains and wolves in most of the lower 48 again and the wetlands are wetlanding and the forests are foresting and the deserts not expanding and the amphibians and insects and fish are all at healthy population levels i will be happy

let’s talk “american freedom” for a second. i HATE the wet dream conservatives have about a very militaristic ideal of freedom. to me when i envision what i wish “american freedom” meant i yearn for a future where everyone has opportunity, can participate in democracy (our democracy isn’t perfect, we have to strengthen it), can do/be anything they want, etc

to achieve these ideals i think i most like the term “social democracy” with a mixed economy — i like the ideal of other more complete types of socialism but believe that a mixed economy is a more reasonable goal. healthcare and education would be socialized, housing and other things would be at least partially socialized, and social services would have more resources.

look i really just want everyone to be healthy, happy, without giving assholes the opportunities they currently have to hurt others, to oppress minorities/the poor/homeless, etc

ok i’m running out of spoons so i’m done for now

[97-liners]

God ur so self righteous it hurts 😭 all u ever do is sit here and throw around ur hot takes and opinions and then expect ur little gremlins to agree with you, but as soon as its another person who has a hot take or an opinion that opposes you, and a few people defend them whether it be a friend or an anon, they are evil, and this is just fatphobia aside like this is EVERY "moral" take you have its just all hot garbage and you being a hypocrit 💀 half the time its stuff that you have literally no say on anyway.

Are you a vampire? Have you always been afraid of mirrors?

"Moral backbone" my ass you just say whatever you will think would appeal to various minorities so you can look like the good guy who happens to be blunt. Its not even being blunt you arent cool for being a cunt towards everyone and it will never be cool. Stick to talking about shit that relates to you and maybe, just maybe, people wouldn't hate on you so much. It's no wonder half of caratblr can't stand ur ass

I dont think this take is as bad as that one time, or well multiple times you have shat on peoples writing styles or the content they write about just because it doesnt fit your vanilla cis straight woman narrative, now thats awful

Or maybe the times you've vagueposted about some of your closest moots just for them to still be here, defending your ass when all you do is talk shit about them constantly

you think i’m just saying what i think will appeal to various minorities. it’s really telling that you think people have the political beliefs they do just to look good. like do you really believe people have the beliefs they do performatively? do you find it hard to believe that people hold beliefs not out of a desire to look good, but because that’s what they believe???

also because this is weird: since when have i vagueposted about mutuals. when have mutuals defended me???? like what are you actually talking about … i don’t care if half of caratblr can’t stand my ass, if they’re that willing to support anything just because a fic writer did it, i don’t really care what they think. like i say it here all the time, i don’t care what y’all think of me. just unfollow me if you don’t want me on your dash.

the main thing i have to say here though. “half of the time it’s shit you have no say in anyway” like i don’t have to be black to think that anti-blackness is bad. this goes beyond whatever this anon is talking about — the problem with “listen to x voices” is that, while it’s important to put oppressed viewpoints in the forefront of discussions, it’s not a free pass out of critical thought. ppl forget “listen to x voices” started out in academic study. it wasn’t about the ppl you choose to defend or the viewpoints you hold publicly. and it’s not about minority voices saying “x isn’t harmful” taking precedence over established theory to the contrary. i think this is something ANY poc understands acutely and painfully because it’s always the conservative and white supremacist sellouts that get put to the forefront. (this includes diasporic poc more so than non-minority people native to their nation. like how irritating that bts has a voice on violence against asian americans when their experience as native koreans has NOTHING to do with the diasporic asian experience!?)

it also gives people an out. if you believe that only x people should talk or care about x issues, then that lets you just sit back and say “well, i’m not x so i’m not involved”… and more irritatingly, it gives you the perceived right to say “well I’M a minority so my opinion is right !!!!”. being a person of color doesn’t make me an expert on racism and i don’t pretend to be an expert. there are white anti-imperialist scholars who have a better understanding of racist power structures than i do and i’m not arrogant enough to just write that off because they’re white.

[bbina]

i fckng hate second chances with every fiber of my being and every living cell in my body. once its over, its over. if u fckd up IMMEDIATELY ✂️✂️✂️ i hate it when a characters get second chances after fckng it up real bad like NO U DO NOT DESERVE ANOTHER CHANCE AND OTHER MC ALSO DOES NOT DESERVE TO RISK GETTING HURT AGAIN

on the contrary tho, for btl, i do think yn should get another chance? is it another chance? well, wonbin didnt really give her a chance to explain herself, he went ahead of himself and created assumptions. and i know that every one says yn is the problem cus had she not offered the fake dating set up this wouldnt have happened BUT wonbin had no problem agreeing to it so....wouldnt really say yn is the root problem. the root problem is their lack of effective communication skills, emotional management/control and listening skills!!! wonbin im sorry but running away was a stupid af thing to do and i know ur hurt but u literally made assumptions after seeing 2ppl hug. babes ppl can hug platonically, believe me. thats all i have to say. *bows, drops mic and leaves stage*

im sorry for the sudden rant when this discourse was already over like a week ago i could not help it. ive been following u for a while but i am a silent reader and this is my first time sending an ask to anyone here in general. im so nervous. is my english okay? i swear i know proper punctuations but im too lazy to do it rn rip. i just want to say ive never been so invested in an eng au cus i usually read the ones in my native language cus THEM ANGST HIT DIFFERENT BRO anyway, i love ur writing sm <33 makes me wanna start writing again as well if it werent for my busy af shed (graduating student things). cant wait for the next updates ✨️🫶🫶

but the angst material is tew gewd don’t you think? second chances trope is nice and all if done right 🤪 maybe some groveling here and there and viola! perfection

most valid btl theory ive seen 😫 they’re both dumb 🤝 and did mistakes,, (yn made a bigger mistake tho) but point still stands

nah ur sudden rant about the week old discourse is perfectly okay. any rant about btl is 👌 cus im curious on how each person takes in the story and seeing a bunch of different reactions is what keeps me going 😫🤝 AND AGAIN IM HONORED TO BE ONE OF THE FIRST PEOPLE YOU SENT AN ASK TO 🙏 your english is great!!!! thank you so much for reading!! and i hope whatever i put out or something makes u want to go back to writing 🙏 i myself is a graduating student too but i still find the time to insert my hobby which is this because i love it so much and its honestly my stress reliever (contrary to popular belief i write more eloquently when i’m either stressed or having a headache idek why lol maybe it gets my brain juice all worked up)

[tenpintsof-sundrop]

Hello everyone!!! Welcome to this episode of Star and Sunny’s bullshit. If you don’t want to sit through of bunch of rambling memes and inside jokes, feel free to move on <3

Star: can i just say that s1 Reid is literally the most baby boy ever (i will do ungodly things to him, i wanna ruin him forever, like is this what a corruption kink is?)

Sunny: you know what this is EXACTLY what a corruption kink is. And I didn’t even think to add that to the tags for this (or Lessons for a Genius, but it totally applies). S1/S2 Spencer is SO FUCKING CORRUPTABLE. So bitable. Like I just wanna tell him filthy things and watch him explode due to the shock 

Star: skipping all the cw cause sunny's got me and I love surprises :3 whatever happens next is on me

Sunny: I do got you!!! Reading fics blind can be so much more fun lmao 

Star: "Sifting through someone’s apartment looking" unironically this would be the shit, i love going through ppls stuff (paperwork can die tho)

Sunny: okay but I would also love this. A chance to just be so NOSY. I would live for this 

Star: "Gideon said" i literally went "🥺 dad ???? 🥺" YES YOU DUMB BITCH WE'RE ON SEASON ONE !!!!

Sunny: If I was actually part of this team and Gideon said that I wasn’t living up to my potential or something, I would cry. Like him telling me I wasn’t doing well enough would be INFINITELY worse than one of my parents being disappointed in me. He is father 

Star: "The only upside was that you got to do it with Spencer" oh i'm gonna do a lot of things with Spencer

Sunny: and Spencer is gonna love it <333 

Star: "naturally fell under your authority" yes ??? cause he knows his place is under a mean woman

Sunny: EXACTLY. He doesn’t have the energy or the time to question us. And he likes being bossed around. He just doesn’t know it yet (but he will though) 

Star: "Reid, come on, take your feet off the dashboard!" you !!!! the germaphobe !!!! literally shut up forever i hAVE THE HIGH (moral) GROUND !!! "And put your seatbelt on!” OH HE'D STRESS ME OUT SO BAD !!!!! I HATE WHEN PPL DO THIS !!!!!

Sunny: HE WOULD STRESS ME OUT TOO. Like everything from this part of the fic was from my heart. I am this mf bossy with people in the car if they are being annoying or not wearing a seatbelt 

Star: "Aw, Reid, listen to your Mommy.” you wish you could call me mommy (or alternatively: well then i guess im letting You die in a car crash)

Sunny: I feel like Derek would be the type to call someone ‘Mama’ in bed. (or Mami?) Like he would call you a ‘hot mama’ - as a compliment, and it would slip out again later during sex. This was just floating around between my ears and I felt the need to share lmao 

Star: "“I bet if you’re a good boy, she might even breastfeed you when you get there" AAAAAAAA I FORGOT HE SAID THAT !!!!!

Sunny: Derek is thinking about our tiddies an UNHEALTHY AMOUNT. (or a very healthy amount, depending on how you look at it.) 

Star: "his voice low and mousy, looking straight ahead as he fidgeted with his hands in his lap" im shoving my tongue down his throat

Sunny: as you should. 

Star: "For the first time ever" preposterous (having to google the correct spelling for that was for sure humbling)

Sunny: lmao it’s okay I wouldn’t know how to spell this off the top of my head either and I’m a native English speaker 

Star: "Don’t worry about it, baby" : O did i just rizz MYSELF UP ????

Sunny: it’s easier to do so around Spencer who won’t question your rizz!!! 

Star: "Sorry, Mommy" you have never done me wrong ever

Sunny: I literally had SO MUCH FUN writing this part, because I was like ‘this is a meme, but it fits SO WELL into the fic, so I have to do it’. 

Star: see reader is stronger than me cause I would've pulled over, federal secURITY JOB BE DAMNED !!!!

Sunny: You have no clue how many times I have been writing a fic and thought to myself ‘they should just fuck NOW’ - but then I have to be like ‘no, we have to stick to the plot, we have to build more tension’. So I definitely agree with you in a lot of ways lmao. 

Star: "wanted to shoot his cum so deep inside you that it would ensure he could give you one" : O im calling the police

Sunny: I’m sure I have one of those monopoly Get Out Of Jail Free cards sitting around somewhere <333 

Star: "You don’t mind sharing with me, right" OMG I SEE WHAT YOU DID HERE !!!! *pointing maniacally at the screen*

Sunny: I had just been watching the Lila episode and it was too much fun to resist lmao 

Star: "he saw that there was only one bed" i KNEW not looking at the cw would yield good results !!!!

Sunny: again, it’s a meme, but it was too much fun not to include. Also usually the ‘there was only one bed’ trope is about two people being FORCED to share a bed because of extenuating circumstances (which is very fun to write) - but this time, it is purely on purpose. The reader character booked the room with only one bed so Spencer would be forced to confront the sexual tension between them. 

Star: "melting like butter over your tongue in a way that made Spencer’s knees wobble" baby and angel are SO DEEPLY ingrained into my daily vocabulary I think Spencer would spontaneously combust

Sunny: oh he absolutely WOULD 

Star: "beautiful natural teardrop shape of your breasts" *excitedly chanting* SAGGY TITS SAGGY TITS SAGGY TITS !!!!!

Sunny: this actually made me snort when I read it omg. #teamsaggytits 

Star: "weren’t actually offering to breastfeed him" we'll get there eventually >:3

Sunny: now I cannot stop thinking about Spencer with an actually pregnant or new mother reader who is over producing milk and Spencer offers to suck the milk out of her tits because they are swollen and painful so she doesn’t have to breast pump, acting like it’s just to help her, but it’s really self motivated because he loves tiddies (will this be a fic I will actually write? idk) 

Star: "your body could actually support the production of milk currently" well maybe if you put a baby in me like you wanted to i COULD'VE

Sunny: WELL NOW I’M THINKING ABOUT EARLY SEASONS WHINY SPENCER BEGGING TO BREED YOU. MORE PLOT BUNNIES 

Star: "or maybe Spencer liked that humiliation, he wasn’t even sure" we'll sprinkle in the fact that Reid is bi

Sunny: I was trying to sprinkle in the fact that Reid has a humiliation kink - but it does probably help that the humiliation comes from Morgan 

Star: "wouldn’t be able to stand the idea of another woman touching him after this" unless we're also there and the other woman is Elle (cause she'd be out mommy too, than everything's balanced out)

Sunny: (Staring at Elle, singing You Are The Only Exception) 

Star: "You knew it wouldn’t be long before he came in his pants" im gonna claw out of my little prison, plEASE GOD ALLOW ME TO HAVE THIS

Sunny: he is so wonderfully pathetic <3 

Star: "Anyone else would have likely let him rest" *in tears* you know me so fucking well, i love it here

Sunny: all that matters in life is writing fics for your one weird little friend <3 I am so glad this one hit !!!

Star: "Glossy and wet with his own release, his cock pinky red from the exertion and friction, still half hard" I think I have rabies, this is what rabies feel like, why else would I be foaming at the mouth?

Sunny: I feel like I need to put a warning on my fics now that they may induce rabies ??? 

Star: "You said that you only wanted to look" .... i can look with my mouth

Sunny: I need ‘I can look with my mouth’ on a shirt with no context 

Star: "he was the one making those desperate sounds" gone wild audio save, save me gwa !!

Sunny: WAIT ONE HAPPENED TO THAT ONE AUDIO POST I HAD SAVED THAT SOUNDED EXACTLY LIKE SPENCER ??? remind me to find it later 

Star: "frail woman getting fucked to death by her husband next door" im husband ? 🥺

Sunny: again, this is one of those random lines that I put in there just for you. Because Spencer is babygirl and we love reversing gender roles 

Star: "That’s enough, baby" I WAS ABOUT TO SAY !!! 4 sugar packets ????? Spencer please, your poor heart

Sunny: he needs to be mommied. For his health 

Anyway, everyone!!! Thank you for coming to this episode of Star and Sunny talk shit <333

Meddle About

Sub!Spencer Reid x Dom!Fem!Reader

‘Cause it's not just a figure of speech - you got me down on my knees.

It's gettin' harder to b r e a t h e .

Summary:

You hate it when Morgan teases Reid. So when Morgan says that you are Reid's 'Mommy' - you verbally fire back without even thinking about it.

Reid vastly overthinks it.

So much so that he ends up calling you Mommy by mistake. And you definitely don't hate the sound of that word coming off his lips.

Sub!Spencer Reid x Dom!Fem!Reader. Co-Workers to Lovers. Smut. Set during Season One.

Word Count: 6,300

Criminal Minds Masterlist | AO3 Link

Detailed warnings and author's notes below the cut.

Warnings: general smut fic - porn with some plot; dom/sub dynamics (but this isn't a pre-discussed dom/sub relationship, the characters just fall into these roles naturally), Spencer is submissive and the reader is dominant; the main theme is Mommy kink - Spencer discovers that he has a Mommy kink after a joke that Morgan makes, referring to the reader character as Spencer's Mommy; Spencer calls the reader 'Mommy' and the reader also refers to herself with that title; the reader uses she/her pronouns and has a vagina (and breasts); it could be interpreted that the reader has larger breasts/is plus sized (but I think anyone of any size could enjoy this fic); the reader is part of the BAU; this is meant to take place during season one (baby Spence my beloved) but there are no other major canon events mentioned and the case being discussed is one that I have made up; some very background typical elements of Criminal Minds - murder, killing, systemic vicimization of women/violence from men towards women (passing mention of bodies being consumed by wild animals); the reader and Spencer fuck while on a case (but they aren't endangering anyone's lives from lack of their attention, so it's fine); mentions of potential injuries from a car accident (theoretical - doesn't actually happen during the fic); very slight threads of Morgan x Reader (mentions of Morgan being attracted to the reader - it could be one-sided); very passing mention of Reid having breeding kink (doesn't take place during the fic, just one of his thoughts); for the actual smut section: this could be interpreted as virgin!Spencer but that's not explicitly stated here (at most, this is just inexperienced!Spencer) (the reader is definitely way more sexually experienced than him); praise kink (we all known Spencer is so eager to be praised); mentions of breastfeeding - Morgan makes a joke about the reader breastfeeding Reid, which later turns into faux breastfeeding kink (the reader doesn't actually lactate, but she lets Spencer suck on her tits and calls it breastfeeding); the reader calls Spencer: 'baby', 'good boy',; descriptions of subspace - but it's not specifically called 'subspace' in the text; thigh humping - Spencer humps the reader's thigh; cumming in pants (Spencer); multiple orgasms/overstimulation (Spencer receiving); handjob - the reader jacks Spencer off while he is sensitive after his first orgasm; using lube as cum; dumbification kink - the reader calls Spencer 'dumb baby' and generally enjoys seeing his intellect drop the more turned on he becomes (Spencer also likes being called this); technically the reader doesn't get to cum, but she gets turned on from treating Spencer like the good boy that he is (and this is more about him). I think that's everything.

A/N: This was directly inspired by the scene from Reid's birthday party, where Morgan says 'Mommy to the rescue!' (talking about JJ) and then Spencer says '...Mommy?' and it seems like he is discovering his Mommy kink in real time. Especially because he is then trapped between Elle and JJ and he makes direct eye contact with their boobs, and he just has such a look of scared kink realization in his eyes. I considered copying that moment exactly and just replacing JJ with the reader character, but this seemed like more fun lmao. I had so much fun writing this and I think this is one of my best fics in a while. I hope you guys enjoy it!!

...

Generally, you hated being stuck with grunt work. 

You knew that it was all part of the job - an important part of it. Paperwork, side interviews, background checks. Sifting through someone’s apartment looking for aspects of what kind of person they were based on their everyday life. 

But you thrived more on being right in the middle of things. You preferred interacting with suspects, chasing people down, harsh confrontation. 

Gideon said that you were overly controlling, impatient, brutally honest - that you had an ‘abrasive personality’ that put most men off. But that was why he often brought you into interrogations with male suspects. Many of the people you caught - men with superiority complexes who targeted the weak to make themselves feel powerful - they hated that you weren’t intimidated by them. That aspect of abrasion between you and the suspects often brought out a lot of information - things they spewed out trying to intimidate you. 

But you weren’t needed on that front today. 

No - instead, you were doing grunt work. The kind of work that made you impatient and generally aggravated. 

The only upside was that you got to do it with Spencer. 

He was one of the only men that voluntarily worked so closely with you so often, because he wasn’t intimidated by you. He took orders from you very well and naturally fell under your authority, bringing a natural chemistry to your partnership when you worked with him. Plus - his seemingly endless stream of ‘fun facts’ was like listening to the radio, which did help to soothe your boredom during these kinds of mindless tasks. 

You were on a case in Texas. Five women raped and tortured before having their bodies hung from a tree and consumed by cotoyes that the UnSub knew lived in the area. Since police had closed in on him, he had gone on the run. He had killed three more women since fleeing, while leaving no clues as to what his ultimate endgame would be or where he would be going next. 

Hotch sent you and Reid to find that out while the rest of the team worked victimology and profiled the scenes of the most recent murders, following the trail he was leaving. 

After spending hours sifting through the suspect’s house, looking for any small clue about where he might be going - you came up empty. When you touched base with Hotch, he told you that you and Reid would be going to visit the suspect’s ex-wife - who lived four hours away. You needed to interview her to see if she could give you any further insight to the man, and perhaps - beat him to the house if she was the ultimate target. 

(A lot of the victims looked like her, and it couldn’t really be a coincidence.) 

You knew that lives were at risk, and it was juvenile of you, but all you heard was: long, boring drive. Boring day. You hoped that Reid would be good company through it. 

Now, you were waiting outside of the police station in the bureau-issued SUV, waiting for Morgan to come and give you the file with the ex-wife’s address and contact information. 

“Did you know that over forty-six percent of Texans own a gun? Texas is second only to Montana in registered gun ownership, where over sixty-six percent of citizens proudly tote their right to bear arms.” Reid told you, continuing to look over the case files that were sitting in his lap. 

When you looked over toward him to reply to this odd factoid, your mind got caught up on something else. 

“Reid, come on, take your feet off the dashboard!” You told him, reaching over to gently smack his knee, trying to encourage his legs down from the awkward position. 

It bothered you for several reasons - the idea that he would leave shoe prints on the dashboard, which was minor and cosmetic, but still annoying. And the fact that if the car did happen to get hit head-on, the air-bag would explode out and push his knees into his chest, causing his shattered leg bones to pierce his organs and possibly kill him. (At the very least, he would never walk again.) 

Speaking of which: 

“And put your seatbelt on!” You barked, now noticing that he wasn’t wearing it past all of the files he had piled into his lap. “You of all people should know how many deaths are caused by not wearing a seatbelt.” 

Spencer opened his mouth to spout out this exact statistic, but before he could get the words out, another voice entered the conversation. 

“Aw, Reid, listen to your Mommy.” 

You were almost startled by Morgan’s voice coming from the open driver’s side window so suddenly. His appearance there as if out of nowhere was so jarring that you couldn’t get caught up on the way he had called you Reid’s Mommy. Your head whipped toward Morgan so quickly that you didn’t notice the flash across Spencer’s features - worry, dawning. You didn’t take note of the way he rushed to comply with putting on his seatbelt. As if he was rushing to please you, even unconsciously. 

“I bet if you’re a good boy, she might even breastfeed you when you get there.” 

Morgan then pursed his lips and made loudly suckling noises, clearly imitating breastfeeding in what he thought was a comedic way. 

Again - glaring at the muscled man through the open window, you didn’t see Spencer’s reaction. You didn’t see the way his large, glassy eyes flickered to your breasts (only emphasized by your own seatbelt crossed over the center of your chest) before he forced himself to focus on the files in front of him so that he wouldn’t feel so caught.

“Shut up.” You told Morgan, your voice so commanding and firm that his simple order was enough to get him to stop his antics. 

“And give me the address already.” You held out your hand expectantly, and Morgan handed you the file, which you placed onto the center console. 

Then, you turned back to him for one last point, determined to have the final word in the conversation. 

“Besides, we both know that you’re the one who’s got an obsession with my breasts, anyway. Just because you stare while wearing sunglasses, doesn’t mean I don’t notice. My eyes are up here, pal.” You told him sharply. 

He let out a scoff at this, and rolled his eyes behind his dark frames - but he made no clever comeback. 

You had successfully bested him. And with that knowledge, you rolled up the window and left him standing dumbly in the parking lot as you sped off. 

… 

You pulled over later to put the address into the GPS system, and you let out a long-winded groan when you found that it was more than four hours away. Four hours and twenty five minutes. 

So you pulled over again to get gas and stocked up on snacks, and you were surprised that Reid wasn’t giving you some lesson about the colloquial use of ‘soda’ and ‘pop’ (thinking that you hadn’t listened the other ten times when he had gone on the same rambling point about linguistics and how language evolves). 

He was being far too quiet for your liking. 

But he was keeping his eyes glued to the files, and you guessed that he was churning over something in that big brain of his, like he usually was. 

You were entirely surprised when the next time he spoke - it wasn’t about the case at all. 

“How - how do you know that Morgan likes your breasts?” He asked, his voice low and mousy, looking straight ahead as he fidgeted with his hands in his lap. 

“What?” You gaped, the word flying out of your mouth as your brain was utterly slow to process what he had just said. 

Hearing Spencer use the word ‘breasts’ was jarring, but somehow utterly adorable. You found it stirring a slight heat within you. Especially because he was still so shy. The whole thing made you want to pin him down and force the shyness out of him. 

Spencer felt the need to further explain himself. 

“When - when you were talking to him, you said: ‘we both know that you’re the one who’s got an obsession with my breasts.’” He said, repeating back what you had said, word for word, using that perfect memory of his. 

You wondered if that’s what he had been doing, sitting there in his seat so silently for the past hour of the car ride - going over the conversation again and again in his head, trying to make sense of it. And because he couldn’t make any sense of it by himself, now he was consulting you. 

Again, you found it so utterly adorable. 

“Morgan didn’t deny it. So - was it a hypothesis based on something, or did you just call him out hoping that you weren’t wrong?” Reid continued, sparing only a singular glance in your direction, a look that you caught out of the corner of your eye with your gaze still mostly focused ahead on the road. 

You found it intensely cute that he was using the word ‘hypothesis’ in this situation. You wondered if he ever turned it off - the textbook big words and the intellect that he always carried himself with. You wondered if you could make him turn it off. You wondered if there was any situation where Spencer Reid could be as stupid as any other man - chasing a bone, desperate to get his nut off. 

For the first time ever - you imagined Spencer Reid underneath you, blabbering nonsense, begging for release with your hand around his cock as you pumped him, red and aching, so slick in your palm. Desperate, empty-headed, beautifully stupid. 

(See, this was what happened when you were forced to do grunt work. You got bored. And when you got bored - you had to entertain yourself somehow.) 

“It was a pretty well-informed hypothesis.” You replied. Now that Spencer had brought the topic up, you certainly weren’t going to shy away from the discussion. “Morgan often brings up my sex life, and wants to engage in detailed discussions about my sexual encounters with me. So I assume that he spends a fair amount of time thinking about me in a sexual way.” 

Reid let out a choked-off noise at this. 

You continued. 

“Plus, he’s always staring down my top. He’s not exactly subtle.” 

“You - you actually notice that kind of thing?” He chirped, his voice becoming a few octaves higher as worry flooded him. 

You bit your lip, suppressing a grin. 

Of course, you had noticed the times that Spencer stared at your breasts as well. He was even less subtle about it than Morgan was. You didn’t mind it when he did it, because you knew that Spencer wasn’t exactly casanova. He didn’t have a different girl every other week like Morgan did, so taking a glance down your shirt when he passed you a morning coffee was probably about as much action as he got. 

Secretly, letting him get away with it was your gift to him. 

“Don’t worry about it, baby.” You told him, the pet name slipping out mindlessly as you reached over and gently patted his knee as a form of reassurance. 

This movement unintentionally drew his eyes toward your chest, especially in his desperation to look anywhere but your face, not wanting to make eye contact with you. But he found his eyes glued to the swell of your breasts once again - hating how perfect they looked, even through the simple cotton shirt and plain bra that you wore. 

“Sorry, Mommy.” The word slipped out before he could even consciously process it. “Sorry!” 

Spencer raised a hand to smack his own face at lightning speed, and slumped down into his seat in embarrassment. 

You bit your lip to suppress a grin. It stirred a filthy heat in your belly. But you knew that Spencer likely needed a while to sit with this and wouldn’t want to talk about it - not yet. So you reached over and turned on the radio, letting the music fill the space so that the silence wasn’t so awkward and gutting. 

…

Spencer didn’t talk for the entirety of the rest of the car ride, which didn’t surprise you. 

When you finally arrived at the ex-wife’s house, his hands were shaking with nerves as he tried to unlatch his seatbelt. You probably should have just left him alone to struggle, but an evil spark, likely fueled by the boredom of the day, flared up inside of you. You couldn’t resist the urge to lean over the console, very purposefully showing off your breasts as you gently pushed his hands away and undid the belt for him. 

“Here, let Mommy get that for you.” You said, distinct teasing on your breath as you mumbled the words into his ear. 

Spencer huffed out a deep sigh and collapsed back into his seat, and pushed his hair out of his face in frustration. But he didn’t say anything more as you gathered the files in preparation for the interview. 

He only spoke when you moved to get out of the car. 

“Look, I-” He began a half assed explanation, and you easily cut him off. 

“You let Morgan get in your head too much.” You told him with a chuckle, opening your door and getting out. 

But as he forced himself to follow you with numb limbs - he knew that this definitely wasn’t all Morgan’s fault. 

… 

The ex-wife didn’t know much. 

She described the marriage as hell - the suspect exhibited all the typical behaviors as a husband that they would have expected. He hated women, and he wanted full control over his wife at the time, which eventually led down the path of divorce. They had to sell the house they had bought together, but neither of them had moved out of Texas since. But he hadn’t contacted her in years. 

She had two young kids from a new relationship, and when the woman stepped out to take a call, you picked one of them up to soothe his cries, hushing him gently while you rubbed his back. 

Because of this, Spencer found himself even more dizzy and confused. 

He knew that it was Frueadian - some deep, misguided part of his psychology - something broken and missing inside of him because of his own fractured childhood. 

But seeing you being so sweet with a kid, especially after the day he’d had - he wasn’t sure if he wanted to be your baby, or if he wanted to shoot his cum so deep inside you that it would ensure he could give you one. 

(Ultimately, he knew that it was likely both - and that didn’t answer any questions for him. It just gave him far more questions.) 

… 

Even though the ex-wife couldn’t give you guys much more than you already knew, Hotch wanted you and Spencer to stay close by in case the suspect decided to make his ex-wife the end game. The two of you would be able to make it to her first if she called for help. 

So you and Spencer had dinner at a random local barbeque place off the highway and Spencer still didn’t talk much through it, other than posing some theories about the case. Even though he was a bit more talkative, he still refused to look at you - he stared down at his plate the whole time. Though whenever he did look up, you noticed that his eyes lingered on your chest - and he still wouldn’t look you in the eye. 

By the time the bill came around and the two of you were ready to leave, you knew exactly what you had to do. 

… 

Spencer waited by the car with his bag while you checked in and got a motel room (needing to stay in town, you got a room for the night). When you came back, you handed him the room key and then moved to get your bag out of the car. 

“Do… you already have yours?” He asked quietly. 

“Hmm?” You hummed in reply, slinging the strap of your go-bag over your shoulder before you closed the back door and used the remote to lock up the car. 

“Your room key?” 

You suppressed another grin. 

“I only got one room.” You told him. “You don’t mind sharing with me, right?” 

You gave him a purposeful look - looked at him through your lashes, bit your lip slightly, and subtly squeezed your breasts together with your upper arms, emphasizing them. You knew exactly what you were doing to him, but hopefully it seemed subtle. 

“I - uh - no.” Spencer stuttered. “It’s fine. We can share.” He gave a grin, not wanting to appear upset, even though his entire body was racked with nerves. 

Spencer followed you to the room and he fumbled with the key with shaking hands for a moment before he sighed and then handed it to you. 

His insides quaked when he saw that there was only one bed. 

He wasn’t sure if he should say anything about it. The two of you had slept in the same room before, but you had never shared a bed before. Sure, you had slept near each other before. He had accidentally fallen asleep on your shoulder on the plane or vice versa. But you had never crawled into bed together with the intention of sleeping together. 

And yes, just the entendre behind it made Reid’s head spin. 

He had a heavy knot in his gut, and hatefully - a distinct stirring in his crotch. He could only imagine how embarrassing it would be for you to wake up and see him compromised in some way. Or god forbid, if you caught him moaning in his sleep because of unconscious dreams that he couldn’t stop - for you to think that he was some kind of dirty sex pervert because of it. 

He felt an overwhelming need to clear the air overtake him. He had no clue how to broach the subject, but he knew that he wouldn’t be able to spend the night like this. He wouldn’t be able to sleep with this anxiety hanging over his head. 

He studied you carefully as you sat down on the edge of the bed, ditching your bag off to the side and heaving out a tired sigh as you began taking off your shoes. 

Spencer put down his own bag and then stood there, fidgeting nervously as he searched for words. 

“I - uh - I am sorry about earlier.” He mumbled out the beginnings of an apology. “What Morgan said was stupid, and I-” 

“I don’t think it was stupid.” 

You let out a chuckle, and reached up the back of your shirt. Spencer found himself frozen, his eyes tracing your every moment as you unhooked your bra underneath your shirt and then moved to maneuver the straps out from your short sleeves while you kept talking. 

“I think he had a point.” You added on. “Good boys should get a reward. And I think you were fairly good today. You didn’t eat all your veggies at dinner, but you kept your feet off the dashboard and you were quiet during the car ride. You definitely get points for being patient during such a long trip, baby.” 

Your voice smoothed into a soothing tone, that word - baby - melting like butter over your tongue in a way that made Spencer’s knees wobble. He hadn’t known it until right now, but you calling him a ‘good boy’ and listing off such mundane things he had done that made him worthy of a reward fired off sparks inside of his brain. 

A breath choked off inside of his throat as you stood up off the bed and peeled your bra completely out from under your shirt. Somehow it was one of the sexiest things he had ever seen, revealing the hard peaks of your nipples and the beautiful natural teardrop shape of your breasts to him through the cotton fabric. 

Spencer wanted to speak, but his tongue felt so heavy and dry inside of his mouth. He knew that he was staring at your chest so blatantly now, but he couldn’t peel his eyes away. He couldn’t even feel ashamed anymore. 

That dull tingle in his crotch had turned into a full on stinging interest, and he unconsciously pulled at the fabric of his pants, trying to loosen some of the tension that was growing, not even considering how it might look to you - him dumbly reaching for his crotch to make it look looser when his hardening bulge was becoming more obvious by the second. 

It was one of the most ‘caveman’ things he had ever done in front of you - standing there with his mouth hanging slightly agape, pulling at his crotch without caring how it looked. You definitely wanted more, wanted to see how dumb he could get. How far you could make him devolve. 

“So what do you say, baby boy?” You hummed, stepping close into his personal space now, causing him to get a whiff of your perfume - something that was only a dull trace after such a long day, but still smelled so good. “Do you want Mommy to breastfeed you? Do you wanna suck on my tits as your reward?” 

You gently ran a thumb across his cheek, and paired with the words, Spencer’s brain short-circuited. 

He knew realistically that you weren’t actually offering to breastfeed him. There was no evidence in your life to say that your body could actually support the production of milk currently - but you were offering to let him play pretend. To suck on your tits with a very sexual air, to call you Mommy without the teasing humiliation behind it that Morgan had hinted at (or maybe Spencer liked that humiliation, he wasn’t even sure). (He hadn’t even known before this morning that he liked the idea of calling you Mommy, but here he was). 

All he could conjure in response was the dumbest, non-human sound. 

“Nngh.” 

It was a grunt from the back of his throat - too much blood swelling to his cock all at once and too much direct attention from you making him dizzy. 

You giggled quietly. 

“Come on, baby. Just say the word. And Mommy will give you everything you need.” 

Spencer inhaled sharply. At this point, he was desperate to get some oxygen to his brain. 

His mind was racing, chanting out: 

‘Yes! God, yes! I want it so badly, Mommy! I want anything you’ll give me. I need you. I need you so badly.’ 

But all his lips could form in the wake of such dizzying lust was: 

“Please.” 

“Good boy.” You sighed. 

You used a hand on his chin to tilt his face up to meet yours, and you consumed him in a kiss - he was hungry and eager to meet your touch, moaning loudly into your mouth, his hands racing to touch you now, rushing up to grip on your hips in the most utterly needy way. He balled the fabric of your shirt in his fists, like he couldn’t get enough of you - like he was afraid you would dissolve away if he let go of you for even a second. 

It was cute, to say the least. 

You only let the kiss last for a moment, though. You pulled away to a disappointed whine from Spencer, which you quietly hushed. 

“Hey, it’s okay baby.” You soothed him. “Come here. Mommy’s gonna take good care of you.” 

You lead him toward the bed, getting rid of his tie in the process, and Spencer stepped out of his shoes along the way. You slid onto the bed and laid up on the pillows on your back, Spencer clumsily following you, crawling on all fours. The two of you had barely started, but he was full-on panting now, racing to catch his breath while his blood hammered through his veins. 

He watched on with eager curiosity while you got comfortable, fluffing the pillow under your head before you then reached down and pulled up your shirt. You pulled the fabric to sit up under your chin, finally revealing your gorgeous breasts to him. 

If he was lost for words before, then he had receded back to a total neanderthal now. 

His mouth fell open and his salivary glands started working overtime as his eyes raked hungrily over your chest - enjoying the pure beauty of the fatty mounds, striped with zig-zagging stretch marks and completed by your hard peaked nipples. 

“Here, come on, baby.” 

You had to remind Spencer what the goal was, guiding him into place with a hand on the back of his head. You helped ease his body to lay on top of yours as he relaxed into you - and his mouth finally found its rightful place on your breast. He became greedy, suctioning hard on your nipple as though he might actually get something out of it. 

Truthfully, he did get something out of this. 

It definitely wasn’t any form of nutrition, but it was something that drove him lustfully insane and made his head fuzzy and warm in the best way. This was the only time in his entire life that he didn’t have ten thousand thoughts running through his mind like the news blasting on television in the background. This was the only time since his first conscious memory that he had actually known his mind to be quiet. 

He felt intensely thankful for it. Intensely thankful toward you for giving him this feeling. 

In that moment, without all the noise, all he knew was the comforting feeling of your fat tit under his mouth, the heat of your body under his own as you cradled him. The soothing firmness of your hands through his hair and down his back - and the distant, sweet purring of your voice in his ears. 

“Good boy.” You hummed, loving the feeling of him moaning around your nipple - so constant and so greedy now that you were sure he didn’t even know that he was doing it. “Such a good boy for me. Such a good boy for Mommy.” 

Your cunt was humming between your thighs, aching so hard at seeing Spencer like this. The usually composed, intelligent, practically robotic Doctor Reid reduced down to a blubbering, moaning, needy mess just because he wanted to suck on your tits. 

Just because you had called yourself Mommy a few times in his presence. 

It was so utterly beautiful, and you wanted more. 

(You didn’t think that you could ever let him go after this. You probably wouldn’t be able to stand the idea of another woman touching him after this. But you would have to think on that more later.) 

You noticed Spencer canting his hips, unconsciously seeking friction against his hard cock while he continued to suck on your breast. With his eyes closed blissfully, drool gathering around his lips where they met your skin in the most utterly adorable way. You couldn’t help yourself - you scooted your knee between his thighs. You then used a hand to help his hips into place, adjusting him so that he was getting good friction against your denim-clad thigh. 

“There you go. There you go, sweet boy.” You hummed, feeling another jolt through your body when he let out a sharper moan against your tit, and began humping your leg in earnest. 

You were quick to encourage him, putting both hands on his hips and helping him along while he greedily hung onto you. He had on your hip, the other hand slipping up to cup fingers around the bottom of your breast, making sure you didn’t escape him while he moved his body against you so frantically. 

“That’s just what you needed, isn’t it, baby?” You moaned out, your voice wavering slightly as the pleasure of it all thrummed through you. “Just a dumb little baby who needed Mommy’s tit.” 

The term ‘dumb little baby’ came flying out of your mouth before you could stop it. Though you knew exactly why it happened. Seeing such a brilliant genius reduced down to this truly did something to your ego. And apparently hearing those words from you did something to him, too. 

He whined sharply against your skin and his hips stuttered abruptly. You knew it wouldn’t be long before he came in his pants, his cock throbbing against the friction of your thigh. And this thought alone caused your mouth to run off without restraint. 

“Such a needy little thing.” You sighed. “You love being Mommy’s dumb baby, don’t you? Not a single fucking thought between your ears, just sucking on Mommy’s tit without a care in the world.” 

Spencer moaned and it sent another jolt through your body - another harsh pang through your cunt. You loved how much he needed you. You loved how much he was clearly eating this up. 

You didn’t even care if you got to cum tonight; you just wanted to exhaust him for all he was worth. Because he was so fucking pretty like this. 

“You gonna cum for me, baby boy? You gonna cum for Mommy? Come on, baby. Cum for me.” 

These words were what ultimately sent him over the edge. Well that along with your strong hands on his hips, encouraging him along while he was mindless and busy mouthing on your breast.

His jaw dropped open, finally loosening that desperate suction on your now slightly sore nipple as he began to pant frantically over your now spit-soaked skin. He moaned hotly while he humped you in an entirely adorable, almost distraught manner - absolutely desperate to have the most friction on his cock while his orgasm overtook him. 

You could feel his needy cock throbbing against you, trapped inside of his pants, shooting off hot ropes of cum that quickly soaked into his underwear and even then, seeped into the fabric of his slacks. You grinned and bit your lip as you felt that wetness even beginning to soak into your jeans, knowing he must have set off quite a big load. 

Spencer soon collapsed on top of you, gulping in air as he tried to catch his breath. 

Any normal person would have taken pity on him (seeing as he was clearly nervous and inexperienced) and wound things down to end the night here. Anyone else would have likely let him rest. 

But again, you felt devilish temptation overtake you. (It was a feeling that seemed to be much more ripe around Spencer Reid.) 

You just felt thankful that your temptation and inclination toward chaos came in the form of lust, rather than something more violent, like the people you studied every single day. Everyone around you should be thankful for that. 

You used your leverage (and the fact that you weren’t nearly as exhausted from the experience) to flip him over onto his back. He let out a surprised sound as his back made contact with the mattress - blinking up at you with shocked, glassy eyes as you moved down his body slightly. 

“Wha-?” He mumbled out the question, only getting out part of the word before you reached for the zipper on the front of his now wet pants. 

“Hey, shh, baby. I just wanna see you.” You told him quietly, causing him to stare down the length of his own body at your hands as you worked. 

You got the button and zipper undone quickly and you let out a quiet ‘fuck’ as you peeled back the wet fabric of his grey slacks to reveal the sight of his simplistic (very Reid) white cotton underwear slightly transparent and stuck tight to his cock, coated in wet, sticky cum. 

“So pretty baby.” 

He only whined in response. 

You couldn’t help yourself - you reached up and pulled down the waistband of his underwear, feeling more lust pricking through you as he was truly revealed to your eyes. He was perfect. Glossy and wet with his own release, his cock pinky red from the exertion and friction, still half hard. You pulled the clothes down over his hips and he lifted his body to help you, clearly glad to be rid of the mess, and the second you untangled the fabric from his ankles and ditched everything aside, you were back on him. 

You skimmed the tips of your fingers oh-so-lightly up his shaft where it was sprawled across his pelvis, and his hips jolted. He let out a bitter gasp - as though cold water had been splashed across him. 

“You said-” He choked on the words as you ran your thumb right underneath the crown, gently pressing into the head, causing him to choke on a moan while his knees quaked. 

You sat on his knees to keep him still and his head became so fuzzy once again. 

‘You said that you only wanted to look.’ 

The sentence died off in his lungs somewhere, and truthfully - he didn’t want to protest. He didn’t want you to stop. 

“Sens-sensitive.” He whined. “Too much.” 

“But you’re so pretty, baby.” You replied, your voice turning smooth and warm like butter again, melting over his whole body, causing all of his muscles to go soft and pliant for you. “Your cock is so pretty. I need to touch you.” 

He let out another strangled noise when you cupped your hand and took him fully in your grip this time, giving one good tug across his cock from root to tip. When you did this again, faster this time, his lungs seized inside his chest - trying to take in oxygen so quickly, as though he were drowning on dry land. 

“You gonna be good for me, baby?” 

“Yes.” He gargled back in response. “Yes, Mommy.” 

He was already so wet from cumming in his pants, and he let out a pathetic dribble of precum as you continued to move your hand - so it was an easy, slick slide. One that sent harsh shockwaves through him from overstimulation. Against his own will, he soon ballooned back to full hardness - becoming painfully swollen in your hand while you sped up your touch and closed your fist tighter around him. It caused the most wonderful hurt between his legs, and made a downright filthy wet sound as you pumped your grip faster along his needy cock. 

Spencer heard wailing and felt the soreness against his throat before he realized that he was the one making those desperate sounds. He distantly wondered what it might sound like to someone else, if the rooms on either side were occupied, if the motel would receive a noise complaint about some frail woman getting fucked to death by her husband next door - because that’s what he sounded like in his own ears. 

But any of those half-thoughts were chased out of his brain the second you flicked your thumb up over the head of his cock and your dirty mouth filled his ears once again. 

“Gonna milk this pretty cock, baby.” You told him, your voice firm. “You gonna show Mommy how much you can cum for me? Gonna show me what a good boy you are?” 

Spencer let out another pathetic sound, his body singing with pleasure at his pure need to prove to you that - yes, he was a good boy. 

He felt tears wet on the side of his face before he realized that he was crying, but it was all too good to ask you to stop. 

You used your other hand to cradle his balls and you swooped down to capture his gasping mouth in another kiss (a very messy, open mouthed kiss that Spencer could barely pay attention to). Spencer screamed into your mouth while he painted his stomach with cum once again.

You only stopped jerking his cock once you had truly milked every last drop from him, his hips seizing up off the bed and your hand almost slipping off him completely from how sloppily wet it was with more of his cum added to the mix. 

He was purely exhausted then. His eyes blinked heavily, struggling to stay open. He vaguely remembered you cleaning him off and tucking him into bed - but he definitely enjoyed falling asleep curled up next to your warmth. 

…

The next morning, Spencer felt hungover. 

He wondered if that’s what good sex always felt like - the combination of endorphins rushing through your body and physical exertion tackling you over. His legs were sore, as though he had run several miles. (Which wasn’t even something he could make a bold comparison to anyway, because he didn’t exercise nearly as much as he should for someone with this job). He woke up starving, grateful when you drove to a diner down the road after checking out of the motel and planted him in one of the booths before going outside to call Hotch in order to touch base with the rest of the team. 

You came back with a small grin on your face. 

“Turns out that tip the ex-wife gave us about their first house in Arlington was pretty solid.” You told Reid. “They caught the guy on his way there. He had another girl in the trunk. They got her back mostly unarmed, and took him into custody.” 

Spencer nodded. “That’s good.” 

When he moved to grab another sugar packet out of the caddy on the side of the table, three of them already open and empty beside his cup of coffee, you grabbed him by the wrist. 

“That’s enough, baby.” You told him. 

His stomach curled, that distinct feeling running through him again. And against his will, that word slipped out - again. 

“Yes, Mommy.”

...

A/N: This is a standalone oneshot. There won't be a sequel or a continuation, so please do not ask for one. If you liked the fic, please comment about the body of work that has been written, or consider reblogging to show your appreciation. If you want to see more Spencer Reid fics that I have written, you can check out my Criminal Minds Masterlist, or you can check out my Masterlists for other fandoms to see if anything catches your eye. Thank you for reading!

[bratz-kitten]

ASTRO OBSERVATIONS [part 5]

— people with jupiter in the 8th may experience an “abundance” of traumatic experiences throughout life, often relating to death; these are the people who truly feel like everyone they love ends up dying. at their worst, they can become desensitized to death— jupiter is ruled by sagittarius, a sign known for being in denial when in difficult situations in favor of optimism. these natives can pretend like nothing actually happened, or minimize the situation in their head so that they don’t have to face it.

— okay this might be a weird one... like, you know in asoiaf when arya was walking through the streets and was always like “i’m as quiet as a shadow”? that’s literally the energy of someone with planets in the 12th house/chart ruler in the 12th house. these people are so stealthy. they’re able to move so quietly and without anyone noticing, both literally and figuratively. on one hand, they’re very quiet about their plans and ambitions to the point where other people only find out when they’re achieving success over it; on the other hand, they just. don’t like making noise while walking idk bitch you’ll only see me coming when i’m right beside you, i even get paranoid that i’m breathing too loud and that other people will hear 

— people with moon aspecting mars can be incredibly impulsive when they feel hurt or triggered. yall need to be careful with doing things in the heat of the moment that you know you’ll regret later... but in the moment, you feel so hurt that it clouds your rational side. please be more self-aware about this because you may make decisions that will directly affect you for the worse in the future 

— people with leo mars ft. constantly asking you for pictures... about anything. they just wanna SEE LMFAO THEY DON’T CARE WHAT IT IS THEY’RE SEEING. you just got ready to go out? “send pics of your makeup and your full outfit”. you’re waiting in a long boring line to get the covid vaccine? “send pics of the line”. your mom baked cake? “send pics of the cake”. plus they send so many random pictures while texting, it’s their special love language

— having moon conjunct moon/venus in synastry feels insane. you tell them something you’ve been through, and they’re immediately like “that happened with me as well.” it doesn’t even have to be something grand, sometimes just very specific things you thought were particular about you. the amount of understanding that comes with this aspect in synastry can feel very new and intense especially if you’re used to seeing yourself as the “odd one out”, used to feeling isolated in your experiences 

— people with pluto in the 1st house often feel the need to erase “traces” of their existence, for example deleting messages that they sent people, deleting all of their social media posts. they can feel anxious and paranoid about other people having access to their past self, even if the past self in question is from, like. a week ago 

— people with chiron in the water houses (4th/8th/12th) might’ve suffered bullying to the point where they repress their memories. a lot of their memories of their school years may feel foggy if they were bullied in those years

— also. people with chiron in the 8th house may feel as though they’ve been punished for wanting to experience intimacy. it’s like, the people who were supposed to be the closest to them – for example, their sibling or something – were the ones who hurt them the most. 

— people with mercury-neptune aspects and strong pisces/neptune energy in their birth chart might struggle with only remembering things when they’re right in front of them. you should keep things in your peripheral vision to remind you of reality, especially when it comes to feelings— so that you won’t start getting lost inside your own head. like... keep the letters your friends wrote you by your bedside table so you can read them every time your brain starts convincing you that you’re not loved. keep the gifts you’ve been sent on display in your bedroom wall, or sentimental material things that remind you of past happy experiences.

— earth placements and their thing for asmr... omfg. it’s like they’re always looking for things to up their sensory experience/sensitivity. like, earth signs are the ones most connected to worldly experiences so they feel so soothed with the whole asmr experience: just hearing someone gently whispering or tapping on/scratching things calms them down and helps them fall asleep. they love the tingles it’s heaven for them

— moon-saturn aspects might hold and caress themselves while they sleep because their parents never did. yes i woke up and chose violence <3 your secret is NOT safe with me 💋

— while we’re on the topic of sleeping, a majority of the pisces moons i know need to sleep while hugging something, at least a pillow. they can’t just not hug something while they sleep, it’s very instinctive for them. anyways if any pisces moon needs a pillow to hold, i volunteer as tribute 💋

— virgo placements feel sososo soothed by hearing their cats purr. thinking about how my virgo placement friends are always the ones who send me videos of them petting their cats... and then i get soothed by how soothed they feel. it’s a win win situation, if you have virgo placements it’s hereby your duty to send me a video of you petting your cat while they purr. right now. GO

— people with gemini in the 3rd house might have shaky movements of the hands when other people look at them doing things. very specific i know but the third house rules hands and gemini is a sign that has somewhat of an anxious, twitchy quality to it. on the other hand, people with capricorn in the 3rd house (scorpio risings, using whole signs) have the steadiest hands i’ve ever seen lol their movements ooze confidence, these bitches know how to make you feel as thought they know exactly what they’re doing

— people with venus in the 1st house ft. altering their pics with photoshop and hating posting selfies without filters because they never feel like their appearance is good enough. stop it. you don’t need to always look your best and especially not if your ‘best’ isn’t even what you actually look like. also... don’t even think about making self-deprecative jokes about your appearance. next time i find one of yall saying “ahaha im not bad for a 5 without talent” i’m squishing your head between 2 pieces of toast and calling you an idiot sandwich. you’re BEAUTIFUL 

— having venus in the 3rd house in composite with someone? do you mean calling each other the absolute ugliest nicknames in the most endearing way? 

— leo deals with themes of the ego, and it seems that leo placements often struggle with attracting narcissistic people into their life... leo suns/mercuries can be raised by loud, overbearing, narcissistic parents who see their kid as an extension of themselves and who teach the kid to always be very supportive and caring towards them or else they’ll deny them of words of affirmation-- either by insulting them to shatter their self-esteem or simply never complimenting the kid back. leo moons/mars/venus tend to attract narcissistic partners who only care about serving their own emotional needs and ignore the ones of their partner, and who feed off of their supportive and giving nature. which is why leo placements really need to watch out for being gullible, naïve and dismissing the red flags because my god, you be falling for some shady people. 

— people with personal planets in the 12th house/chart ruler in the 12th house might feel like they can’t let go of their past life— they may dream of memories, people or places from another life. it’s like they can’t detach from it, and even if they can’t directly remember their past life, it’s like they feel it in their bones. also, they might’ve felt... estranged from their family ever since childhood; there may have been feelings of being unable to emotionally connect to their (often, distant) parents, and they might’ve even wondered if they were adopted because of how different they felt to the rest of the family. 

— okay so, a thing that people with saturn in the 3rd house need to look out for is mentally checking out of conversations while they’re still happening. these people can detect when they’re being manipulated really fast and their way of dealing with it can be to immediately shut down, to grow cold and silent and not even bother answering when you’re expected to respond. and, like, that’s great when someone starts screaming at you or being insulting/trying to coerce you into shit, but take notice if you find yourself shutting your loved ones out as soon as they say anything that triggers you. don’t simply detach from them, communicate what’s wrong

— aries placements, ESPECIALLY aries suns and moons, value generosity so much and they get so turned off by stingy ppl who don’t share with others, especially when others need it. like.. if you’re hanging out in a group with them and someone asks for a bite of your food because they have no money and you say no... espect them to never respect you. ever. 

— people with libra placements use soooo many adjectives to describe things. something can’t just be beautiful, it has to be DIVINE and CELESTIAL and INTOXICATING. they can be so expressive god it’s so fcking funny 

— capricorn placements HATE asking others for advice because they think no one knows better than them (and they’re not wrong, lol). when they truly care for someone, they might ask the person for advice simply as a sign that they respect, trust and value their judgement. even if they don’t plan on taking it LMFAO 

— people with mars in a water sign can have this terrible habit of expecting other people to guess what they want. and then they get passive agressive when you don’t instinctively feel what it is they want... and when you ask them “do you want this?”, they go like “FINALLY. i thought you’d never get there”. stop it. i know that you want people to understand you in a way that transcends words, but you can’t expect people to read your mind and then get disappointed when they don’t, thinking “oh if they loved me that much then they would’ve known that i really want chipotle for dinner :(” GIRL WHAT. COMMUNICATE YOUR NEEDS  

[rosebrushstars]

Astrology Notes

This is my first time posting an astro observations post. Im not much of a professional, I studied astrology through books and online astrologers. BUT I think sharing what I know from observing ppl around me would help others to gain more knowledge about themselves or maybe understand something. 

Lastly, I do this because I want to. 

WE ALL GONNA DIE ONE DAY SO WHY NOT.

Gemini venus are famous for flirting but do you know they have a very good sense of fashion? Almost too good that you won’t see them looking ugly even if they r just wearing a table cloth wrapped around their body

You can check your 5H for how you feel around children. 

Aries in 5H - Impatient as eff 

(everything has a good side and a shadow side, I am a bit cynical so Im only gonna state the bad ones)

Cap in 5H - Srsly, why are they acting so childish? (cuz they are children)

Leo in 5H - play with them, get bullied by the children, feel so done but do anything for them because they’ll tell u THEY ARE BABIES UWU

The house that your Jupiter is in would show your luck

Jupiter in 10H - lucky when it comes to career

Jupiter in 12H - LAST MINUTE LUCK ( so magical sometimes)

Jupiter in 11H - Lucky with friends ( the most loved one in friend groups)

It is fun to see Aries mars and Pisces mars dating. (ofc im joking)

One is loud, one is shy.

One is overthinking about marriage , one is talking about the poster on the wall. lol

Leo venus loves to bully their partner. 

Not in the way of Scorpios. But more like a baby pouting and yelling because their partner shifted their attention to wipe off the dust on the table for one second.

Even if you have super mature placements in your natal chart, one Leo venus and boom you are a baby.

Scorpio dominant would die for spicy foods.

Scorpio loves vibrant colors so much like pink, yellow or cyan but the ones that they are comfortable to wear are RED and BLACK. 

They just like to represent themselves in RED or BLACK. But check their accessories or room color, you see those cute colors. 

Venus in 12H conjuncts ascendant do not know the fact that they are loved and ppl biased them. they think it’s just ppl casually being nice to them. 

Aquarius in personal placements are weird as eff but they are proud it.

If you are both Capricorn-Aquarius Dominant, you’re acting serious but feel awkward. (and it’s obvious to everyone)

Find a celebrity with this placement and you’ll see why. 

Sag Sun are super nice and get along with everyone until Scorpio Dominant wants a deep conversation. 

Gemini are toxic as eff and everyone hates them. 

NO NO NO Have you see a real Gemini who has gone through bad shit? 

They are so fun and loving and also not to mention their well-balanced and diverse knowledge. 

They are know-it-alls since they were born but the thing they have learnt from their dark side is when to join the conversation and when to say proper things.

I have read an astrologer’s post yesterday( im so sorry i don’t remember ur name) everyone hates Gemini until they talk all the way to your heart . (im so sorry im not a native so i don’t know if im using good eng)

Taurus or Capricorn plus Gemini placements would steal your heart without you knowing. 

You can tell who’s Aries just by looking at how they sit.

Their sitting posture says Im ready for anything, Im the best

Also it looks like they are flirting with you.

I have a soft spot for Taurus Moons. 

All three earth signs are great mentors but here’s the difference,

Taurus is super nice super patient and gives off a very stable vibe. Would take the bullet for you as a good supervisor if you make a mistake at your work. They will show you how to fix it. 

Virgo would also take the bullet for you but AFTER that, you’d get scolded for every little mistake you’d done and will not stop mentioning it just to make sure you remember it. Plus scary stares. 

Capricorn will tell the boss what you did exactly and would take the responsibility as a supervisor. But you won’t get scolded like Virgo would do to u. You would get an example of work they did and they will show you how they fixed your mistake. Fine I’ll do it myself vibe

Have you ever met an Cancer-Taurus Dominant person?

You are lucky if you’ve met one.

Super Nice Gentlemen.

Caring Independent Ladies.

If a Cancer cries because a guy bullies them, here’s what the others would do,

Aries would punch the dude who makes them cry.

Taurus would sooth them with gentle words. 

Gemini would make jokes to make them laugh and curse the bully at the same time. 

Leo would help Aries punching the bully.

Virgo would act like they’re trying to knock off the fight but not really. they’d be probably happy with the bully getting punched.

Libra is the only one who wants to talk things over but too afraid to tell Aries and Leo to stop.

Scorpio is tired of Cancer crying and the bullshit happening in front of them so they would probably be drawing a plan to make sure the bully learn the lesson.(not gonna discuss the details)

Sag is the bully. JK JK 

Capricorn would call the police. 

Aquarius is on the same page with Libra and manage to get Leo out of the fight. (nobody can’t stop Aries though)

Pisces would cry with cancer cuz they got bullied in the past also.

Hey Universe, 

Finally im writing. u see?

[sagittarius10thouse]

SUN IN CAPRICORN

plz note that these are only personal observations - so this is not any kind of “eXpERt opIniOn”

also sorry for mistakes, if any. i’m not a native speaker :)

So, today’s post will be about my damn-they-are-so-serious buddies with Capricorn Sun! 

Firstly, Capriocorn Suns are quite ambitious. If they have a goal, they will acomplish it no matter what. For example, my sister, who has her Sun in Capricorn have been saving her pocket money to buy a pencil case. Or there was a Cap Sun guy who wanted to pass his exams, like, VERY well and go on to good (prestigious) university. Of course, he did it he’s a Cap Sun after all. Talking about education, many (but not all) Capricorns are usually straight A’s students. It doesn’t really matter whether they like school / college / university or not. In a nutshell, people with this placement love learning something new - especially if it’s connected with their future career. Oh, and Cap Suns usually run a page dedicated to education - one Capricorn dude has a whole public page about education system and its problems in my country. 

The next thing that I wanted to talk about is that Capricorn Suns are a bit detached. They are definitely on their way - and it doesn’t mean anything bad. They are rarely the most talkative person in the group chat, and if it’s vice versa, then well...they may seem kinda irritating. Seriously, Capricorn Suns usually annoy the shit outta me - even if they’re my relatives lmao. Buuut a lot of people find them quite entertaining so idk 

There is a common stereotype about Capricorns in general that they’re so damn serious and hate jokes with all their heart. It’s 100% not true (about Cap Suns at least). All my acquantainces & friends & family members with this placement have an excellent sense of humour. They can easily lighten up the mood even if their jokes sometimes seem kinda specific lol. So ppl with Sun in Capricorn don’t have that resting serious bitch face all the time, duh.

And the last observation is that Capricorns are friendly! :) I mean, they don’t try to befriend every person that they see but they treat well all of their acquaintances (if they have at least a normal relationship). And they’re always ready to shoot the problems when asked. They are really amazing as friends!

Song for a Capricorn Sun: “Little Wild Thing” by Kingdom Come

Celebrities with Sun in Capricorn; • Elvis Presley, singer • Muhammad Ali, wrestler • Gerard Depardieu, actor • Kate Moss, fashion model • Nicholas Cage, actor • LeBron James, basketball player • Jimmy Page, guitarist • Irina Shayk, fashion model • Isaac Newton, scientist • Richard Nixon, 37th President of the USA

[pandoratheprocrasticreator]

You're not listening. The raya thing was not what she was canceled for. SEAsians and Asians called her out on how she addressed it and instead of listening she called us crazies and associated us with White woke people. And then that is what got us mad but instead of apologizing she doubled down and canceled herself. She did not apologize she just took the "well I'm sorry if you were offended" route. That video? Yeah it was nothing but "I wasn't being racist and besides it was mostly white people complaining". She took so many of our actual points and manipulated them or just flat out ignored us. This wasn't even for the Asian community but for Black and Native Americans she has dismissed in the past. If you like her, go ahead. But a lot of us are tired of White women doing this crap to us

sigh......

I am also an Asian. We are not a monolith so I can’t speak for what you were or were not offended by, but to read the original raya tweet, and even her reply afterward, as “associating asians with white woke people” is the most bad faith take I have heard. Sarcasm exists and she was being sarcastic when she referred to people as “crazies.” That isn’t even an offensive term and to view it as offensive you have to have either been expecting her to spout racist bullshit even before you read her tweet or have read it 80 times trying to look for anything at all to “cancel” her for.

Did you watch her video? Did you listen to anything she said at all or is “listen” just a catchphrase you use to dismiss other people’s arguments when you don’t want to refute them? She apologized for what she needed to apologize for. There was nothing to “call her out” on for the Raya thing so she doesn’t need to apologize for that. She was being racist in some places which she acknowledged and apologized for, and wasn’t being racist in other places. If you want ppl to take accountability for being racist then you must listen to them when they address your accusations, whether it’s to defend themselves (because wrongful accusations do happen!) or to apologize.

She didn’t “do any crap” to you.  The raya thing was not “dismissive of asians”, and should not have been the start of this wave of controversy. If you genuinely care about her apologizing for being dismissive of other poc in the past then you would have messaged her in private and explained, politely and logically, where she did wrong. (She may not have replied anyway bc of all the non-constructive hate she was getting but adding to that hate doesn’t help anyone)

Ellis was cancelled because people didn’t like her take on raya, full stop. And because people on tumblr, twitter, instagram, etc. don’t know how to dislike/disagree with someone without making it into a moral crusade, they twisted it into an accusation that she was being dismissive of asian-centered stories, and was therefore being racist towards asians. And everyone knew that that accusation was so flimsy that they started digging up old offensive stuff that ellis did in the past (some over a decade ago! again! people change and lindsay certainly has!), a lot of which ellis has already addressed, if not apologized for in the past. But I guess even though yall say “all she had to do was take responsibility and apologize” you won’t leave her alone when she does just that because you guy just want an excuse to harrass someone off twitter and pat yourselves on the back for getting rid of another “secret racist.”

Anyway, if you do actually want to discuss this with me, please message me off anon. I don’t want this kind of discourse to fill my blog, nor do I think my followers will want to see it. If you have evidence more recent than a decade ago of ellis doing something problematic that deserves cancellation, then tell me about it and I will consider it. However, implying that you’re a poc who’s been victimized by ellis to strengthen your argument does not gain sympathy from me, another poc who was offended by ellis’s older works but accepted her apologies on this.

[0ystercatcher]

ranting heehee

ppl on twitter are trying to revive the "central/south american indigenous people did human sacrifice" convo and once again im seeing attempts at denying it bc i guess that means invasion and take over of the americas wasnt justified and i am tired man why is everybody so afraid of like. honesty. like yes the aztecs mayas and incas practiced human sacrifice and it was horrid. and yes the spanish thought it was horrid i mean it was i cant imagine that just being a normal part of life for people. but the spanish didnt know abt it before getting here and were very likely going to take over the land anyways stopping sacrifices is just a really convenient excuse.

seeing other people agree w the fact the spanish / portuguese were well intentioned for trying to "stop it" (read: invade and take over territory and resources to become richer) is also sad considering we know very well how they thought of the indigenous people they were trying to "help" that were being sacrificed basically and what they brought them (war death disease etc) so its like ?? thats also an obviously fake portrayal that ignores the atrocities the spanish / portuguese commited.

literally no one in this fight is like...morally defensible. the aztecs were pretty brutal the mayas were pretty brutal the incas were pretty brutal but so were the european empires at the time i mean they were out there torturing people in public for entertainment ?? torture was literally a normal part of trials in europe at the time and like. without big pyramids too so like whos the real loser here. anyway i hate hate moralizing abt the conquest of the americas i really do bc its entirely useless and just creates shitty interpretations. who was good and who was bad is such a weird thing to give weight to when considering history etc. like i jest abt incan supremacy bc thats my country's history and obv im attached to it and think its interesting but they werent really any better morally than any other empire at the time and incan history becomes spanish history at some points just like spanish history becomes incan history as well, they cant be separated anymore.

and at the end of the day modern south/central am simply wouldnt be what they are without the spanish / portuguese. hispanists are right to at least recognize the role of the spanish/portuguese empires. its one sided ofc (and usually racist bc theyre also stupid ass trads) bc the remainders of native american empires also determined how the continent was built. this applies to every positive thing and every negative thing. you cant have todays latam w all its beauty and horrid flaws without the pre conquest people and the europeans. its stupid to watch people in either the decolonization side or the hispanist side pretend otherwise.

[myjunkisyuzuruhanyu]

Girlie I gotta say if you're going to bitch at Nathan Chen for being homophobic (as he deserves) you can't just ignore that Shoma hates women...

Why did I see this coming? 🙄

I don't feel like I "bitch" about Nathan, but ok. I adressed an issue where he said a homophobic and mysogynistic answer in an interview.

I have answered the "Shoma thing" couple of times already. You can look that up if you want to. So I didn't ignore anything at all. And so I am not allowed to have an opinion because I still support Shoma? I have explained my reasoning before. And also why exactly should I bring Shoma up when Nathan is in question?

But still let's unpack your accusation a bit:

First of all there is still no official confirmation that it was Shoma after all. It was a voice, not a video, in a quite "skating anonymous" YT gaming channel that isn't officially tied to Shoma's name at all. So even if I agree that it likely was Shoma's voice in this, it's still totally different from an official interview with your name attached to it like what Nathan did.

2nd - this is not the whole picture of what Shoma actually said, it was "I hate girls my age because I see them too hard to impress boys" (at least this is one translation of similar other translations). There is a 2nd sentence to the "I hate girls" that ppl like to forget, because that frames a specific group of girls and not women in general (I dunno why ppl forget that - maybe I do) . He also said he hates animals and himself and a lot more things in a gaming stream of 4 hours and in between answered questions about his favorite food etc.

3rd - Translations make a difference. There are many different translations of what he said and they differ a lot and it depends on who translated it - a hater or someone neutral or a fan - because Japanese speaking ppl are not agreed on the fact whether he actually meant "hate" or "dislike", which makes a difference in how heavy the wording may hit. As I don't know Japanese myself I can only refer to translations of others and chose which translation to take as truth (none and all at the same time), I guess like most of his English speaking fans. (I can assure you from other native Japanese speakers that the Japanese FS fandom in general doesn't care at all for what he said in that stream, so maybe there is a context we as non-Japanese speakers are not getting or a society thing shows.)

THOUGH I do agree that the wording was mysogynistic and I am not excusing what Shoma said.

But I also don't neglect the background of the time that it was said at a time where he was without a coach, didn't feel he was worth anything, was thinking about quitting skating etc. Back in September 2019. So for me a mood where you say bad stuff. (If any of you wants to read different translations of this stream, you're welcome to ask - I'll send you links)

Btw you can read many interviews where Shoma praised woman and girls, for example he wanted to train with the Et*ri girls because he found their skating/jumps impressive. He also had two female coaches whome he praised at any minute, he also was the only male skater for long time in this group. In one of his recent video on his official affiliated channels he talked about "how girls are so much better at doing steps than he is". In SOI 2021 he praised the girls - who he was in a group number with - because how they repeated the number again and again and made him more comfortable because he was so bad at learning it. (The Japanese girls have all spoken in Shoma's favor how he made them laugh, about his intense stare in his eyes etc. You can also look this up under # soi2021)

As for Nathan the issue is different from Shoma's case. It was an official interview about the perception of the sport as "feminine". So he wasn't even asked about his personal feelings towards girls or LGBTQ ppl or asked about his sexuality but he chose to speak about being straight and about how the sport is "LGBTQ dominated" which is just plain wrong and how he wants to make the sport more masculine instead of adressing the perception of the sport as wrong or problematic. (Shoma was asked "what about girls" and talked about himself not the sport) Nathan as a world champion is heard and had a chance to have an impact to talk about the problems but he didn't. Instead he showed internalized homophobia and misogyny (not on purpose ofc and he may not even realize it yet) in his answer, so this was no help at all for the problems in this sport. Call me biased but there is a huge difference if you mumble something while gaming or if you have an official interview and know your words will get published and recorded. I don't and I won't excuse either one for what they chose to say, but to put everyone in the same pot just because "misogyny" is mentioned is a far too easy take.

I understand ppl got offended, it's also fine to cancel your support for either Shoma or Nathan. But as I said about Nathan as well in the post, I believe in the good in ppl and I am very sure those few sentences don't picture Nathan's nor Shoma's whole personality or world view in general. I don't judge ppl based on a few sentences, because I also wouldn't want to be judged by one insensitive thing I said at some point. We don't know these skaters, I haven't talked to them, did you? I also believe ppl can grow past mistakes and I also believe action speak louder than words. (I can only say for Shoma but when I met Shoma at the Challenge Cup he was surrounded by women and he signed autographs on the floor while everyone looked down on him and that's a thing a mysogynist would never do)

Calling out wrong behavior or microagressions is totally fine and we can all learn a thing or two, but to hate on the skaters or call them mysogynist or homophobe is going a bit too far imo. Also it deflects from the openly straight forward homophobe and mysogynistic men in this world.

And lastly as I said in another post already I follow skaters for their skating and Nathan's skating was never my cup of tea, so I wasn't his fan at all before, which is very different with Shoma as I loved and still love his skating and call me crazy I am not liking Shoma any less than before, because his skating remained the same and also I don't put ppl on pedestals. I am not actually personally offended when someone turns out to have flaws and views that don't represent my own views. I am old enough to understand that ppl irl differ from the person they show outside and I am also old enough to understand ppl have many layers of their personalities and just because views don't fit my own, doesn’t mean they are awful persons.

I write far too much, but I hope you got what I wanted to bring across, girlie....

_____

I am here in this fandom for skating first and foremost and I support who I like and if you don't like Shoma (or Yuzu) anymore or at all feel free to unfollow and block me.

If you want to talk about Shoma and what he said you can send me a message I swear you can be honest and I also understand if you're not able to support him anymore. I don't want to convince anyone that you are not allowed to feel offended and hurt, just that I am not. I was disappointed in his words as well but I looked into my heart and there is still the same feeling there ever was. (You can also talk about Nathan but I may not be the right person to help you here as I never was his fan)

[magniloquent-raven]

Fic Writer Questions

i was tagged by @cherry-toxic and @gideongrace ty both 💕🥰💕

How many works do you have on AO3?

15

which is a relatively small number but sometimes im still like, holy shit i finished 15 whole fics lmao

What's your total AO3 word count?

68,299 (time to post a 701 word fic and then never post again i guess)

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

well this is about to get mildly embarrassing lmfao. ive only got harry potter & stranger things fics on my ao3 and tumblr but if you want a full list, as a teenager i posted a shitty borderlands self-insert fic on quizilla, and hiccup/jack frost fic on ff.net.

and if u count fics that never got finished or published anywhere i dabbled in teen wolf, supernatural, dragon age, star wars, left 4 dead 2, skyrim, good omens, the mcu, buffy, wynonna earp, plus like, general disney/dreamworks crossover fic. and i started writing shameless fics recently, we'll see if i actually finish any. aaaand...i think that's it?

so...15?

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. Wait for you, Burn for You

2. Find Our Way

3. Something to Hold

4. Room for One More Troubled Soul

5. Don't Know What I'm Gonna Do (About This Feeling Inside)

all harringrove fics except #4, which is probably only on the list because it's been on ao3 the longest lol

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

oh god, i used to. i did when i was starting out, but then i just. i get self-conscious about what to actually say & leave shit to sit for too long. and suddenly ive got like 100 comments i havent replied to and i want to respond to them so bad but ive left them so long i feel weird about it now and it's a problem 😥

i want to start responding to them again, and every time i get a new one i tell myself im gonna but i never do cuz im fuckin awkward lmao

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

i......don't really do angsty endings. like, most of my fics end with smooches and/or love confessions lmao, i don't like leaving things off sad, even if it starts depressing as hell.

maybe this one? it still ends soft but without resolving the thing billy was angsting about, so.

Do you write crossovers? If so what's the craziest one you've ever written?

hahahhha.............i don't really do them anymore, but i already said i was into the whole animation movie crossover thing, so. yeah, i did lol. it was when i was in high school so of course i did one that was like, every disney character ever and they're going to school together. which really isn't that crazy a concept, but it was a lot of movies to write in so maybe that counts

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

nahh, not rly. i don't get around enough to attract anti attention lol, tho i did get one of those "👎" comments when someone was going around doing that, which lbr, is so low effort it barely counts 😂

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

yea sometimes. i do get the occasional horny idea lmao. mostly "what if touch-starved character + tenderness" or someone having lots of feelings while they're fucking. someone is usually billy lbr. i've also got a couple "what if someone got tied up and treated right" ideas but i don't think i've actually published any of those lmao

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

don't think so?

Have you ever had a fic translated?

i have not

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

yea, kinda! a collab with a friend of mine for fun

What's your all time favourite ship?

i...don't know? i get emotionally invested in characters more than the relationships themselves lol. i don't even know what ship i've been invested in for a long time, most of the shit i shipped as a kid i don't give a fuck about anymore lol.

except fuffy, actually. i've always shipped buffy/faith

and if we wanna go with fandom i've actively stuck with the longest it'd be harringrove. cuz ive been here and writing shit for yall for over a year now when i usually would've cycled thru a couple fixations by now lol

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

that's a mean question lmao how dare you. i honestly don't know, i have a lot of wips and i want to finish all of them. i know i won't but there isn't one specifically that seems less likely than the others so idk

What are your writing strengths?

uhhhhh.....i mean i've been told that my characterization is good? like, ppl being able to picture the actual characters when they're reading n stuff, so that's nice. and i could write introspection forever, u don't even know man, i get in the zone. i love getting in a character's head and picking apart their emotional state

What are your writing weaknesses?

writing dialogue really trips me up because i get picky about word choice lmao. i can be writing uninterrupted for twenty minutes cuz it's all a character's inner monologue but the second they gotta speak out loud im sittin there like ok what words sound natural and how much would they be willing to say etc. etc. suddenly it's an hour later and i've written three lines of dialogue. plus i tend to edit as i go so i'm always stopping and going back and rewriting stuff instead of just finishing the damn story

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

no thoughts head empty

lmao for real tho idk? i mean there's that one trope, when someone says nice stuff in a language the other person doesn't speak because they're pining and not sure if they're allowed to say it outright, that shit's cute. im sure all the google translated dialogue has been annoyin as shit for native speakers lmfao but yeah

What was the first fandom you ever wrote for?

probably harry potter but i literally have no idea. i started writing fic in my early teens and that time of my life is a big fuckin blur lmao

What's your favourite fic you've written?

ngl i think my fav fic is one of the multi-chapter wips i haven't published lmao

BUT. if i gotta pick something yall have read, this one. just a lil guy. plant dad billy and domesticity. it's cute and i like it. maybe also this fic that i wrote for valentine's day. i wrote basically the whole thing in one day and i was really proud of myself lmao, and i just really like headcanoning backstory for billy & that fic is rly just about him growing up, so

tagging @rvspberryjvm @wingedbears @paperbodiesamongthestars @platypan

if yall wanna! 💕

[juvinile]

* LÉO  DAUDIN ,  CIS MALE  +  HE / HIM  |   you  know  XAVIER  HUGHES ,  right ?  they’re  TWENTY - FOUR ,  and  they’ve  lived  in  irving  for ,  like ,  THEIR  WHOLE  LIFE ?  well ,  their  spotify  wrapped  says  they  listened  to  SAY  SAY  BY  YOUNGBLOOD  HAWKE  like ,  a  million  times  this  year ,  which  makes  sense  ‘cause  they’ve  got  that  whole  TRIPPING  OVER  LACES  YOU  KNOW  YOU  REMEMBERED  TO  TIE ,  THE  DULL  VACUUM  OF  GETTING  THE  WIND  KNOCKED  OUT  OF  YOU ,  SQUEEZING  CONSTELLATIONS  TOGETHER  TO  MAP  OUT  YOUR  FEATURES  thing  going  on .  i  just  checked  and  their  birthday  is  APRIL  30TH ,  so  they’re  a  TAURUS ,  which  is  unsurprising ,  all  things  considered .

TW  INCLUDE  anxiety tw, bullying tw, panic attack tw.

AESTHETICS :

tripping over laces you know you remembered to tie, the dull vacuum of getting the wind knocked out of you, squeezing constellations together to map out your features, chewing teeth and regret, sharp tongued anxiety like flames at your heels, bearing crushing disappointment with hard taught posture, shoving fists into your pockets, empty trophy cases collecting dust, a hazy fog of shame, reusing beer cans for whiskey, telescopes that see into the future, planets with more rings than people.

CHARACTER  INSPO :

patrick verona (10 things i hate about you), somehow both yuri’s (yuri on ice), jackson whittemore (teen wolf), tybalt (romeo and juliet), llewyn davis (inside llewyn davis), luther (umbrella academy. this one hurts to admit bt theres some parallels there. don’t execute me), haymitch abernathy (the hunger games), the premise of being an antihero, the trope of a bully that stops bullying ppl, scary looking dog that lives next door (my apartment)

GENERAL STATISTICS :

full name :  xavier donovan hughes

age / dob :  twenty four / april 30th

gender :  cis male

pronouns :  he / him

faceclaim :  léo daudin

orientation :  pansexual

residence :  orion avenue / delphinus heights

occupation :  zoinkies employee

pinterest :  HERE !

BIOGRAPHY :

they weren’t always irving natives, but no one can seem to recall when the hughes moved in to the big house at the end of the cul-de-sac on orion avenue. there’s probably a rational explanation for this but no one really bothers to find out. what a fun little moment of foreshadowing for xavier’s life. 

xavier was born in irving some time after the mysterious arrival of his parents. an only child, he would be the sole inheritor of the family estate (something they always told him and he was always like lmao what the fuck are u talking about). there’s probably a second home somewhere, maybe two or three, xavier assumes. makes sense because his parents were and are literally never home.

when they were home they were putting pressure on him to live up to some expectation that he wasn’t confident he could ever reach. he played like 5 different sports as a kid and was really good at most of them, but roadblocks would start to get in the way of that later.

he was also a really smart child but left to his own devices too much. grew up too fast and too slow simultaneously. he had a strict curfew, strict diet, manners classes, everything to prepare him for. what? 

xavier was a really smart child, blessed with private tutors and language coaches, a revolving door of adults to latch onto when his parents weren’t around. none of them permanent, and mastery of everything he did was always expected. 

in high school his parents refined their hopes for him. a soccer scholarship, xavier’s least favorite sport but the one with the most promise, the most room for growth and potential to make good on the hughes family name. he was instructed to quit everything else, even told to fall back in school if it was necessary. he repeated a grade. everything was harder then.

truthfully he’s really good a soccer, but he gets horrible anxiety before every match. it wasn’t along before that anxiety started spreading to. basically everything he did. 

lashed out at most people because he didn’t want to appear weak. was not a nice person in high school at all. had more enemies than friends and the friends he did have weren’t the most well liked people around, didn’t have the best reputations. didn’t want anyone to know how anxious he was so he forced himself out of his shell so much it hurt. 

his girlfriend cheated on him senior year with a guy he was unwilling to admit he kind of loved himself. it was the final straw that broke the camel’s back. he’d gotten a scholarship to a small in state school for soccer already and he played a season, literally did so bad. couldn’t even go to class because he was doing so bad. he got a second season chance to redeem himself and kind of shit the bed with that one too. lost his scholarship and his parents made him come home.

now that he’s back he does pretty much whatever he wants, and his parents pretend not to care (they’re never around to notice anyway) as long as he works a steady job. he’s officially really stuck in life with no backup plan for his future. all he knows right now is that he regrets the way he treated. pretty much everyone.

but forgiveness is never easy.

PERSONALITY :

extroverted. introspective. intelligent, philosophizing about the greater meaning of things. anxious, buried under a lot of deflective techniques. relatively keeps to himself. overworked and put out, most of the time, it seems. big fan of bottling things up and collecting these feelings on his shelf. good at small goals, horrible at the big picture stuff. not organized. defensive of and loyal to a close circle. regretful. slothful, lately. passionate, mostly about outer space and pole vaulting. soccer hater. 

WANTED CONNECTIONS :

people he bullied in school that still hate him and look at him weird when he crosses the street.

someone he was a dick to in school who he’s always fighting with now.

ex soccer team members ... ex track team members .. maybe one of them saw him have a panic attack before a match. keep it a secret between themselves.

people who crash at his house when his parents aren’t home (which is always)

people who think his family is involved in shady illegal shit (they could be, xavier doesn’t know what they’re always doing)

coworkers at zoinkies? he’s notoriously bad at his job because he literally doesn’t try at all but somehow doesnt get fired. pretty privilege probably

people who want to see the good in him idk soft 

hook ups he probably has a few but hes emotionally unavailable. recurring trend in my muses.

[younggayanddoingokay]

When people talk about redemption arcs, and who does and doesn’t deserve them in shows, I think there’s a heavy bias of sexism, racism and colorism in those sorts of discussions. And the excuse that is always given is, “well, white/lighter skinned/male sad boy character deserved redemption because he felt bad about what he did and actively worked to fix it!” And okay, you have a point, but I ask you to consider two things: the reason that the white, objectively more privileged character decided to work for redemption was because the (usually white, male) creator WROTE them that way, and the reason that the minority character never did those things was also a deliberate choice made on the parts of the creators. And 2, and perhaps what I want to highlight the most: Nobody feels bad about what they did until they do. There was a time when the character who seems so deserving of redemption to you had not felt bad nor started to atone, and yet in many cases they’re still considered sympathetic by fans even then. So, why not extend that same courtesy to minority characters? Simple: sexism, racism, and colorism.

Take Hama from ATLA for example: first off, the way she was written was, as pointed out by others, was by white men, and the way she fits into the narrative reflects that. In reality, revenge crimes by natives are basically non existent, especially when compared to the preference of white hate crimes (and there’s a whole nother post on why it’s fucked up that the actions of one minority fall badly upon the entire group when thousands of whites commit hate crimes and are just viewed as “bad apples”). But even disregarding that, how come iroh gets a redemption arc and Hama is just cast aside after filling her role in the narrative, and viewed as beyond redemption? The things that she did were objectively far less severe than what iroh did: yes, keeping a cave of captives like a garden of succulents is bad, but she didn’t kill anyone, unlike iroh, who literally razed entire towns and whose kill number probably reached the thousands. Peoples excuse for giving him the “right” to redemption is that he felt bad and struggled to atone, but there was a time that he didn’t do either of those things: would you still feel he deserved redemption then? Many would probably say yes. And that’s when you need to take a good look: why was not Hama given the chance to seek redemption, or transferred back into SWT custody after the war? Why was she just forgotten and written off as a villain who was jsut there to further the narrative and to state the rather white opinion that “oh yeah committing atrocity against your ppl was bad but lash out in anger and do the same to ours and you’re beyond help.” I have two answers and it’s purely racism and sexism.

[mueritos]

You know not all transmeds are bad people, right? Yes you may not agree with their ideologies, but not all of them are like Blaire or Kalvin. Not all of them push their thoughts onto others or ignore a person's pronouns simply because they don't agree. They still try to be polite. At the end of the day, you're generalizing them, just as some transmeds tend to do as well.

I’ve had this ask in a while now and at first I was mulling over it and now I just look back and laugh. This is the equivalent of Trump saying “there are good people on both sides.” Here’s the thing: I recognize that on each side of an issue the people that comprise them are individuals. What I don’t recognize is the fact that the ones with harmful rhetoric are excused for not being as open or as assertive about it as others in their community. This lengthy so I will insert a read more. Not proof reading this so if there's spelling mistakes just get over it.

There is a spectrum to bigotry from violent and genocidal fascists to white women who clutch their purse just a little bit more tightly once a brown man enters the elevator with her; the point is is that it’s still bigotry. Here's the amazing thing about bigotry: we all perpetuate it. Yes, that means even the largest of saints are still capable of backwards thought. That’s quite clearly the point. For example, its not enough to say you’re not racist, no, because saying that gives a person enough feelings of validation to feel like they don’t have to examine their own internalized thoughts/feelings/ideas. What SHOULD be hailed as correct is to say you are ANTI-racist. The addition of the word ANTI signals two things: 1, you are AGAINST racism, and 2, you are working to be AGAINST racism. This includes keeping up with current events, listening to others’ experiences, learning when to be quiet, etc.

So how does this relate to the idea that all transmeds are transphobes? Well, we’ve already established that everyone is and are capable of bigotry on various levels. I feel I’ve already explained why transmed ideology is already transphobic before, but just to summarize why I personally do not subscribe to it: I refuse to partake in neocolonialism. Transmed ideology is a direct erasure of indigenous trans and gender variant identities/peoples by the assumption that trans or gender variant identities are rooted in medical diagnosis/treatment, and also by the assumption that gender dysphoria is a byproduct of transness when really its a byproduct of a Eurocentric society. Essentially, colonization sucks and is the reason why trans identities are so controversial in the first place (literally one of the first things that Christopher Columbus did when he set foot in America was round up all of the Two-Spirit people and set his dogs on them).

Okay, so I said my opinion with a bunch of fancy words, so what? The issue here boils down to neocolonialism. What europeans did to America (yes America and not THE AMERICAS, people seem the forget that north and south american are literally ONE continent) is obviously still evident today. In other words, what colonization did to the world is still evident today, and I think it’s incredibly important to be aware of how it’s still being perpetuated today. Rigid ideas of gender are just not true and to think that they were always so is just so false...”It was something of a historic coup to enforce the notion of two fixed, idealized genders that we now consider natural. Speaking in strictly physical terms, many perfectly healthy people are born intersexed, with male and female physiological characteristics, showing that these categories exist on a fluid continuum” (Anarchy Works, Peter Gelderloos). I’m not sure if you can understand the GRAVITY of the quote above, but this is not just online discourse, my friend. Trans identities have always existed, you see this in native Two-Spirits and in los Muxes from Oaxaca, Mexico, and biological variation is a natural and healthy phenomena that occurs in ALL species (and in fact is necessary for species survival). Concepts and ideas of “otherness” originated from colonizers with fucked up religions and capitalist greed. When we refuse to accept experiences other than our own (non-dysphoric/poc gnc trans ppl/mogai), when we refuse to listen to science and history (biological variation, indigenous trans identities), when we refuse to own up to the fact that evidence and science changes (”gendered brains” has been disproven yet still heralded as evidence for transmeds, etc), we are not only denying our perceived reality, we are perpetuating centuries of violence. 

Do I believe all transmeds are bad people? No, and I never said that. I just said transmed is transphobic. I am someone who believes in change as I have seen it occur in people I never thought possible. My father called my uncle a f*ggot for marrying late and today he is unlearning the years of hate instilled in him by a society that teaches to oppress and colonize. My mother told me no one would ever see me as a man, and today she calls me her son. Their comments were bigoted, but they are working to not be so.  THAT is what matters. I let my thoughts and my ideas and my research be presented publicly in hopes that someone may question something they were taught to be true, or in hopes that someone may learn to understand others better, etc. I focus my efforts on those are trying to understand, not on the ones who are just “polite” and sit on the sidelines watching with disgust in their minds. You may not necessarily be a “bad” person for subscribing to transmed rhetoric, but one should not deny the fact that transmed rhetoric is transphobic/racist/colonialist. If you are not working to be against bigotry, you are part of the problem. Decolonize yourself.

I hope this cleared things up. If I have some information incorrect, pls let me know. If you also have additional information, please add! If you would like additional reading/viewing:

Anarchy Works:

 https://theanarchistlibrary.org/library/peter-gelderloos-anarchy-works (Ch 1. Human Nature)

Los Muxes:

 https://youtu.be/iiek6JxYJLs

https://theculturetrip.com/north-america/mexico/articles/a-brief-history-of-muxe-mexicos-third-gender/

Two-Spirit:

https://kitschmix.com/two-spirit-spiritual-concept-gender-native-tribes/

 https://www.ihs.gov/lgbt/health/twospirit/

http://plainshumanities.unl.edu/encyclopedia/doc/egp.gen.004