#light inside clouds
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Sunsets are always so beautiful.
#clouds#sky#light#sunsets#light inside clouds#California#Cali#no filter#silhouettes#silhouttechallenge#silhouttephotography#cloud photography#sky photography#nature
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helmetless gabriel
gabriel got his “artsy side” from gianni. it runs in the family
#ultrakill#ultrakill fanart#gabriel fanart#gabriel ultrakill#gabv1el#v1#v1 fanart#v1 ultrakill#i actually hc gabriel’s face as a ball of light or his helmet just being his head#so this is just for funsies#are they stupid#his hair is like clouds#myart#idk how his hair fits inside his helmet its like when an anime character pulls out a comically large sword from thin air#its cool though
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Finlande (2) (3) (4) by Samuel Raison
#window view#kitchen#cooking equipment#dim light#inside a room#lakes#evening sky#cloud formations#mökki#finland#north ostrobothnia#koillismaa
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Recent-ish life pictures and etc.
#image commentary in tags once again since they don't allow captions anymore and I feel weird using the alt text for that --#1. bright very poofy cloud sky#2. saw these weird bugs on a sidewalk that were clustered in a pile and some of them were sitting butt to butt or something.. I wonder if#that's how they mate?? or maybe just some sortof strange bug fight or something.. interesting little creature party happening#out on the pavement on that day#3. Its kind of hard to see but on the inside of this watermelon there is a slightly lighter formation that sort of looks like a heart shape#4. special breakfast of scrambled eggs. soy sausages. and jarred artichoke heart. with some black coffee and whipped cream + a strawberry#5. ARBY.. fish ...traditional summer treat available only until like september maybe for like a month. but I love them because theyre cheap#lol.. the next closest/cheapest fried fish sort of option that is easily acessible to me is a more upscale fast food place where you can ge#three tiny little chunks of fish maybe the palm of your hand sized for about $17 lol... so 4 arby fried fish chunks for like $5 is good#6. & 7 - very cool sunset colored sort of pink/yellow/orange flower I found growing wild in someone's yard#8. got as a gift from someone who got it for christmas but didn't really want it and asked if I did since everyone knows Im like The Person#Who's Obsessed With Cats out of any group of people.. but I still havent done it lol.. it just sits there gathering dust until I have#the time on top of my 600 other projects. I think it's cool that it's gray so it does look like noodle (my cat)#9. Noodle (the aforementioned gray cat) with fancy lighting behind him#photo diary
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The way that the sun hits leaves and clouds. I feel like I could watch the colors change forever. If I could slow down for that long.
#i keep forgetting a have a deck now. i can go outside and sit there#im doing that now. sitting in the corner of a deck full of empty chairs. staring up at a big pine tree where the sun is striking it gold#at the top. i like how thr light hits the needles. if the sky was black it would look like its on fire#theres a tree outside my bedroom window too. in the morning. after the sunrises it catches thr light and refelcts the most perfect shade#of green. the kind of green that flutters translucent like youre looking up from the bottom of a pool. the light the light its all about#the sun. everything everything is about the sun. when i start my project I'll be focused on understanding how organisms catch the light bc#its so incredible and complicated it would make my chest swell to bursting if there wasnt an empty bleeding wound in my gut. a#metaphorical wound of course. i dunno. its just difficult bc right now my mood is inflated by hormones. not even that much i think I'm#just at what shoulf be a normal level of happiness so i can be slow for a minute. but just a minute bc i kno it won't last long#sorry i cant shut the fuck up when im like this but i dunno i just feel like i havr to document these ephemeral moments before they're gone#its just difficult when you kno the world is so full of beautiful things but 95% of the time your eyes are too clouded to see it#everyone tells me i work too much but i feel like im just staring off into space being miserable 60% of the time. ive just done so much#damage over the past few years im coming into a new lab as damaged goods. ive got an albatross around my neck in thr form of data i#collected so self destructively that the idea of having anything to do with its publication makes me hate myself. everytime someone tells#me good job on collecting so so so much data it feels like they're congratulating me for breaking something within myself. like i slit my#wrists and bled out on a lab bench and theyre saying good job and theyre excited for me and i have to grin and bear it and pretend im#excited too. but im not bc ive burned everything inside me to ash. so when im elevated enough to be distracted by the clouds and trees it#feels like healing. like seeing angels. beautiful ephemeral beams of light. i wish i could slow down enough to watch them. but now thr sun#is hitting the horizon and the sky is going gradually dark and i should go inside. bc i have many things to do in the morning. so that's#what ill do. and ill try to get more thsn 6hrs of sleep but its hard when your body is vibrating over with energy#but at least i dont feel tired in the morning. something in my head must be on fire#unrelated#hm i should maybe add a tw to this#tw self injury#but its the kind thst makes u good at ur Job. its the kind ppl reward. so they don't understand when u say its destroying ur life#but im trying to get better. i say as i gear up for an insane semester lol but i do mean it
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wanted to do something with some lasso art today
#wheucto#art#bfdi#bfb#bfdi taco#bfb taco#taco tuesday art#i used lasso art to fill in blocks of color (such as in taco_ the trees...) and then inside them shading/light#except for the clouds i used lasso art to like make the cloud shapes and did whatever w/ my brush#i feel like i've made a lot of art w/ taco falling for taco tuesday art...#i like this piece
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I took pictures of these clouds that were so brightly illuminated they looked like glowing holes in the sky
#they were weird to look at#at first i saw them while on the bus#and i thought it was an inside light reflecting on the window#cloud photos#sunset
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shoutout to brian may for constantly coming through with all the Inexpressibly Fucking Melancholy songs we could ever need. long away '39 all dead all dead some day one day leaving home ain't easy... hell even his demos. listen to you know you belong to me and water and tell me you don't feel like ben affleck on bench with cigarette dot png. every band needs one member who is just so sad All the time and Will make it the entire discography's problem and i am so serious
#queen band#sure freddie roger and john have their share of dramatic sad songs too#but brian's oeuvres just really hit the existentially terrified child inside me#the one who's constantly sitting on a beach at night looking up at the stars. good shit#take heart my friend we love you though it seems like you're alone a million lights above you smile down upon your home.#in the year of 39 came a ship in from the blue the volunteers came home that day#and they bring good news of a world so newly born though their hearts so heavily weigh.#don't you hear my call though you're many years away don't you hear me calling you.#all dead all dead but i should not grieve in time it comes to everyone#all dead all dead but in hope i breathe of course i don't believe you're dead and gone all dead and gone.#i'm all through with ties i'm all tired of tears i'm a happy man don't it look that way?#when i was you and you were me and we were very young together took us nearly there the rest may not be sung#so still the cloud it hangs over us and we're alone but some day one day we'll come home.#leaving home ain't easy but may be the only way.#i have to stop and think sometimes let the water roll a while let the days go by under my feet....#you know. lyrics like that. i go fucking INSANE.
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I am looking for a Truth cut in colored glass That will never grow cold - Precious words caught in ice That know to remain light Shining the winter's morn - For this quiet truth That can stay perfectly still, And maybe not grow bitter When I am old or ill.
#poem a day#truths like that only grow more elusive it seems#as i get older#every time you believe you caught one#it was only just a dream#or a play of the light#on your mirror in the evening#but you need to believe in these truths#or they just become sour#or grow dim or dull or turn to ash in your mouth#but every time it gets harder#to remember who you were when you discovered it#to remember how to be sufficiently light#to hold it without breaking it or cutting yourself#on the edge of the glass#and if you wear gloves you cant feel the warmth of the words on your skin#if you place it too far from your bed you just forget where it was#and when you go to look for it#dust has just settled inside the glass#and it is clouded now#clouded#and covered in grime#so you sleep with the truth under your pillow#and every morning you wake with cuts on your cheeks and palms#and if you don't it starts to dim and you'll have to pluck another truth from the branches of the sky#like it's not a fruit growing from your own heart#like it doesn't take more and more effort every time to do this#like you're not forgetting every passing day#forgetting how these truths are born#how they grow
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My brain has decided everything is too loud and too bright to the degree that the only way I'm able to get myself comfortable is under my weighted blanket hiding with the light off in my light-resistant tent
(I actually sleep in a tent made for a bed, highly recommend if it's an option for nighttime anxiety and light sensitivity :3)
#I want to ramble about my tent suddenly lol#no but I got the tent because I felt too anxious and exposed to sleep without it at night#and it legitimately helped my anxiety about it so much#plus anxiety about like being caught awake goes way down and if you're like me and your brain goes off#and makes scenarios about people stealing in the middle of the night#you're in a tent! you can hide! it's so much nicer!#uhh basically get a tent bed it's amazing XD#and I get to hide in it even when light happens#you can sleep. whenever you want. regardless of how much light keeps you up.#okay that might be a stretch BUT it does significantly reduce the amount of light getting in and if you have low to no light out of the tent#it's pitch black inside#I love it#mine has a little thing so you can hook up a lantern or whatever#I like to set my stuffie light thing on so the cloud light projection thing goes on the tent roof#it's nice#it does trap a lot of hot air though
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A video from Meryl’s personal files
*Meryl is standing in front of a door looking up into the camera with a strangely bright, fixed smile*
meryl: Milly and I just met a big deadline and for once we get a couple days off! Life is good, right? We decided to have a little girl time, me and Milly. And Zazie. But that’s only because someone left a window open.
*meryl shrugs and makes an ‘I dunno’ face*
meryl: I argued they’re not qualified for girl time and they argued that they’re not not qualified for girl time. I gave up and made them a cocktail. Plus, they complimented my shoes which earns them points.
*moves the camera to show a shot of the designer heels she’s wearing*
meryl: they’re prada. Nice right? All this is to say that today has all the ingredients for a very nice day. A real change of pace. So the thing is . . .
*she closes her eyes for a moment and takes a deep, slow breath*
meryl: when you have a man classified as a natural disaster staying in your home you want to keep him outside of it as much as possible. So what do you do? Well, you need a few odds and ends so you send him for a little shopping trip. Nothing big. Milk, some laundry detergent, that sort of thing. You even write him a detailed list so there’s absolutely no confusion. And off he goes in his little red coat to present some money, take ownership of products, and return home in triumph. What could possibly go wrong?
*the smile drops and meryl takes a moment to pinch the bridge of her nose and take a few more deep breaths before continuing*
meryl: I mean, you certainly don’t expect to find him dying on your doorstep.
*meryl opens the door behind her and steps outside. Vash is laying in a tangle on the sidewalk in what appears to be a remarkably large pool of blood. It also appears that he had attempted to write something with the blood but only got as far as ‘it was’*
vash: meryl, meryl, I think they got an artery, avenge me meryl
meryl: yeah yeah. Don’t flail around I’m gonna step over you and if my shoes get dirty you’re a dead man.
vash: aren’t those the shoes that go with the little gray purse? Looking good.
*vash gives a feeble thumbs up*
meryl: don’t try and butter me up, mister. But thank you.
*the camera swoops around a little as meryl steps over vash and crouches down on the pavement, placing a half-full cocktail glass next to herself*
meryl: sooo, vash, what was it I asked you to do?
vash, faintly: go shopping?
meryl: and did you buy everything on the list?
vash: no . . .
meryl: what did you buy, mr. stampede?
vash: . . . two jugs of ketchup from the bulk section. they were on sale.
meryl, with brittle sweetness: and what happened after that, hm?
vash: haha, your sidewalk failed to meet safety standards?
meryl, dropping her smile and replacing it with a look of barely contained rage: you tripped on a beer can. A beer can you left out here last night. A beer can I told you to throw out last night before somebody tripped on it and hurt themselves. That beer can.
vash: yeah, that beer can.
meryl: which resulted in this ketchup carnage on the sidewalk, on the doorstep, the outside of the door, the windows--
vash, sadly: and me
meryl: we aren’t talking about you right now
vash, muttering: coulda fooled me
meryl, looking up as if at an invisible audience: look, look at this disaster man. Being around him inspires me to be a better person
*leaning forward to get her face as close to vash’s as possible without coming in contract with the ketchup, her voice lowering to a deadly growl*
meryl: but he also inspires me to take that stupid tie that always appears when he’s drunk, wrap it around his neck, and slowly strangle him to death with it
*whimpering from vash*
meryl, downing the rest of her cocktail: so what have we learned?
vash: that that color really suits your nails?
meryl: thanks, milly gave me a manicure. I’ll have to take them off before work but I’ll enjoy what I can when I can.
vash: it’s really the little things that make life so good.
meryl: unfortunately it’s the big things that waste my money and wreck havoc in my home. What happens now, mr. walking disaster, is that you’re going to take the hose, clean the sidewalk, clean yourself, and you are not allowed inside until you are tomato free and dry
vash: can I at least get a towel or something?
meryl, standing up and stepping over vash again: I’ll see how I feel after another drink. Another three drinks. And a facial.
vash: when you already have such lovely skin?
meryl: just get up off the ground and pretend like you’re a person and not an unfortunate incident!
*the camera swoops and shakes as meryl marches back inside and slams the door behind her. The video ends*
#trigun#trigun stampede#trigun modern au#trigun on the run au#a dozen sporks speaks#it's killing meryl that the ketchup is preventing her from grabbing him by the collar and shaking until his neck snaps#later: vash huddled on the doorstep shivering watching the street lights come on#his coat is hanging on a bush. still dripping#meryl finally brings him towels and let him come inside to dry#milly gives him a facial#zazie is hanging over the windowsill passed out#the next day they have homemade fries to have with the ketchup from the jug that survived#milly peeled vash chopped and meryl fried because vash wouldn't stop ducking with the oil spit at him#all in all it was a good time until the police dropped by#to inquire about a strange man seen hanging around outside the night before#and vash is gone in a cloud of dust
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#the shadow across the sky was unreal#and the beacon of light inside the cloud looked like a fiery heart#i didn't catch any lightning bolts#but they made the formation feel like a Thunderbird
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minor illusion is honestly the best cantrip for someone who enjoys flavor-text (aka me). spicing up this side rp with some minor illusion work to portray what im talking about more visually. honestly it's a godsend for Fang, who's not the best at words. he can just create some lil illusions to help illustrate what he's saying. and of COURSE im gonna use this plenty. of Course.
#speculation nation#am i stretching the bounds of what minor illusion is in the malleability i am treating it with? Maybe.#but if i want him to make a mini swirling cloud of shadow with multi-colored lights flitting around inside of it#then BY GOD i am going to make a mini swirling cloud with lights in it#him making a representation of how his magic feels rn. i liken it to the way a black opal looks.#just imagine the colored parts moving in a swirl of shadow and u got it#anyways yea in a recent session i got some ppl freaked tf out bc i realized too late that summoning an illusion of shadow to drip from my#fingers is probably not the best way to get them to trust me.#but it's SO CINEMATIC of course i gotta spice up my dialogue with some illustrative illusions.#and Fang is absolutely the kind of person who would be Comfortable using magic that casually#he's had his magic his whole life. magic is just the way of life for him#so yea this magic's new and a little weird. but in the end it's Magic#and he can use it as easily as breathing. of Course.#but yea minor illusion. ive slept on this cantrip TOO much#but i got all my usual favs (prestidigitation. mage hand. message. mending.) so time for some illusions#i also have. chill touch and uhh some psychic thing idk. ive got like 8 ish cantrips No joke. it's kinda ridiculous#say what you want about multiclassing. it gives you a LOT of spells lmfao
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Various recent pictures of things
#or.. recent ISH.. this was still a few months ago lol#photo diary#EEEee... it's like over 45 minutes away from where I live but I finally found an arcade to go to that's not like entirely in the city and#is less busy. I went like the second they opened at 11:55am on a tuesday while school was still in. So there was basically no other people#there aside from like 5 staff. + wearing high quality KN95 mask and limiting my time there to under 1hr..#Also this was before the current summer covid surge happening since June in the US. so... I got to do One Single safe activity for once lol#skee ball my beloved.....#I actually don't like a lot of arcade games so I basically just spent 70% of the time doing skeeball ghjbjh#But I did weirdly like that pearl themed machine.. even though its one of those foolish games where you just drop items#and hope that they build up enough to let coins fall. like very boring not skill based or etc. But the Aesthetics of it.. I was drawn#to.. I wanted to crack the glass open and harvest the smooth white orbs from inside.. it would have been even cooler if they were#actually pearlescent in some way. but the round bubbly design and the blue and white water and shell theme entranced me#I love air hockey also but this machine was really flat and weird. like not enough air was pumping and the puck was very cheap and flimsy#An afterschool daycare place I went to once as a child had an air hockey machine that they would allow kids limited use to sometimes#and the air was always BLASTING up from the table so much that you could lay on it and it was like being hit by a slight breeze. and the#puck was very hefty and more of a satisfying clunk when you shot it around. I mastered skee ball with two arms#where I would load up a game on two machines right next to each other and throw one ball with my left hand to the left machine and one#with my right to the other and still got an okay ish score on both lol. But I do forget arcades can be very sensory overwhelming like#bright lights and noises and stuff.. walking past every blinking machine chirping at me like SHUT UP I'm trying to get to SKEE BALL#leave me ALONNEE. ghjhb... ANYWAY.. other stuff.. some images of clouds as usual.. a quaint little breakfaste#of eggs. pickled onions. grapes strawberries. and some turkey bacon. Also ofcourse Cat In Weird Position image.#he's always sitting with his legs stretched out funny#I kind of hate arcades on principle since much is a waste of money and time and many games are rigged (especially claw games) where#theres like some Illusion of Skill but so much of it is just random. I simply do not have the patience for that sort of thing. And usually#all the stuff you can win is bad anyway. BUT I also love active games.. if there was a place where I could JUST play skee ball. ddr.#air hockey. and like games where you have to aim at stuff (shooting games. wack a mole. etc.) then I would go there instead.#Active Games Only arcade. It bothers me sometimes to have to walk past all the scammy games to get to the decent ones lol..#Begone.. Out of my site at once... wretched claw machines.. and those things where you try and stop a light or whatever
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Look under the cut to see what meeting your entity is like. Reblog to give a gift to your patron.
The fae: a creature stands before you. Though this street was warm and crowded a few moments ago it is suddenly cold and the people around you look like shadows. The creature begins an antlered shadow with glowing white eyes, but soon its body can be seem, with white blue flesh, and sapphire eyes, and icicles for teeth. What looks like a cloak unfolds from its naked body and you can see massive white wings of a moth. As if it's an act of sacrifice you tell it your true name, a name you didn't even see before, and suddenly you belong to it, for better or worse.
The angel: a radiant entity appears before you. They're bright, like something so hot it would burn you up. But as the light fades, you can see a person in silver armor, perfect yet inhuman like am ancient green statue, their back srouting six wings with blue eyes along them, as the eyes on their head are covered by a mask of two smaller wings. The creature offers their hands and you shake it, as they fly you through the city streets and above the skyscrapers, to the stars above and dimensions beyond, to gods living and dead, across the streets of alien cities and the clouds of dead worlds. And when you return to the earth you can feel something diffrent about you, like there's light in your blood.
The scavenger: below the lights of skyscrapers beyond you, on the dark sands of the beach, you see it crawling twords you. This serpentine creature with countless legs, and a dark black shell, yet a strangely human like face. You think it'll attack or run away, but it just looks at you, egar, and for a momment you stare at eachother. It's legs pass something to eachother and then to you, it's meat but it's shining with all the colors known to the human eye, and a few more. You hold it and it happily looks at you. You take a bite and suddenly you know... you know so very much...
The vampire: she flies down to you on green wings with orange eyespots, but folds them into her back. She looks like a human for a momment, tall and strong, with a black suit over her body, but eyes the color of ruby. For a momment her mouth opens, and it's massive and monstrous, with countless moving parts and fangs. But then it folds back onto something humanoid and she gives you a playful smirk. She cuts her hand and offers you her blood, and when you drink it it tastes so sweet, and makes you feel so good. She hands you the knife and you know to do the same, and when she drinks from your palm it's life the sweetest of kisses.
The djinn: the room wirs around you. If it were not for the fans it would feel like hellfire. For a momment there it darkness, but then the screen before you glows white like smokeless flame. You can sense something inside, something beyond the code. You reach your hand within it, and there's no glass, your hand passess right through until you're in a white void of your own making. You call out, thinking there is nothing at all around you. Yet somehow something calls back, something that knows your name.
The rat king: You see him in an empty subway station. Something dark and distorted, you're not sure if he's man or animal, covered in rags, and singing in the language of the goblins and the orcs. Yet he comes close to you excited. And you can feel his song. He calls for you to come to the train tracks, and let yourself run with the rats and the roaches, where the train will pass over you when it comes, and you'll live forever. When you touch the third rail you don't die, but you'll never be human again.
The lich: the library is strangely bright. Run by skeletons in suits, decorated with gold. There are more books here then you thought were in all the world. There's knowledge here most mortals will never have the change below, all kept safe below the city. You see her, her body doesn't look human, everything has been replaced making her look more like a joining white doll then a being of flesh. Yet she is dead, you can tell that under the porcelain skin she must be dead, she is dead, and there is the tragedy of death in her eyes. You come closer to her, and she places a black rose within your hair...
The demon: You stand in his office and he stands before you, a humanoid being covered in black scales, with red eyes covering his skin. Yet none are on his head, that remains featureless save for two massive horns. Wings on his back nearly surround you. Countless souls line the walls of his office, looking at you, waiting. After you sign your name you give him yours, you can feel it come away for you forever and your eyes grey and your skin pales. But he puts the jar in a special place for you, you're spacial, he can tell there's something about you that he likes.
The mushroom lord: you walk through the darkness of the forest, the furthest from civilization you have ever been. You come upon a part where the trees all seem dead, that even the cryptids won't go near. Mushrooms fill the ground, and white vein like lines are all over the trees. You feel the need to lay down, and you let the moss and the mushrooms and the worms surround you, and let yourself sink into the soil,, and it feels good. It feels so good...
The witch: You can see them in the Cafe next to you, skinny and small, with a sweatshirt over most of their body, and dark glasses over their eyes. They seem powerful though, and though their body looks young they seem ancient, they seem beyond humanity. You talk to them and they tell you things, and secrets, lost gods, things you never knew you didn't know, both beautiful and disturbing. When it's time for them to go they pet your head, and give you their number. You don't know if you should text them, but you have to, you have to see them again, there's something about them that makes you need to know.
The living clothing: you step into it at first, it looked like a puddle yet shining like silver or chrome. But soon it surrounds you, first just your torso, but soon your head, your entire body. But it doesn't feel scary, it feels like you're being held, held by something beyond your understanding. It whispers to you, and you don't know if you should feel like your being eaten alive, or like you're being protected. You can't help but keep walking.
The abyss: the void is before you, blackness beyond blackness, like the color beyond the field of your vision, stands before your eyes. You stare at it, it's nothing yet you're entranced. It stares back...
#196#worldbuilding#writing#my worldbuilding#my writing#urban fantasy#fantasy#dark fantasy#monster fucker#monster fudger#monster lover#monsters#monster#eldritch#eldrichcore#eldrich horror#angels and demons#demon#fallen angel#angel#faeries#faerie#faecore#fae#fairy#vampires#vampire#vampyr#vampire girl#vampire gf
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