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the-theater · 5 years ago

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Story Two: Fucks High; School for Furries and Drug Lords (Pt. 3)

The Finale to the Kronicals of Rebecca Swansin. It ends as it began; making absolutely no sense whatso ever.

chapter 24 the new villain

Asahi: You’re adding a third villain before you solve any of your other villain problems?

AN: I did some artwurk for rebecca enjoi it! tel me wat u think abut it!

Briar: I am thankful that we don’t see the artwork. I know nothing of your art skill, but I don’t want the mental image I have of Rebecca to be shattered.

I got the estate which I looked at. It was a freaking beautiful shade of blue which reminded me of a cloudless summers day [AN: REBECCA IS SMART SHE READ SHAKESPEARE].

Cherry: Cloudless summers day has nothin’ to do with intelligence, literally anyone can relate a shade of blue to a time of year.

Asahi: Is she trying to reference A Midsummers Night Dream? Not really my favorite when it comes to Shakespeare.

I smiled on the side contordedly. I stood agast because the sight was so great to see!

Briar: I don’t think “Aghast” is the right word to use in this context, unless you really are horrified by the house.

The walls of the estate were red because the Collins love blood and really tall to ward off Mexicans.

Asahi: Racism. Nice.

Cherry: Didn’t ya just say that it was a “beautiful shade of blue”?

Finally we entered the compownd through the gates and we saw the house. It was at least 10 times bigger than my own house (before it burned down). I felt a ping of sadness growing expectantly in my heart from the void where I lost my house. But I had to go on and do good things to make up for my past sins.

Briar: At least you’re trying to do good.

Asahi: Trust me, that ‘I must do good things’ bit will stop as soon as Bella shows up.

I saw a homeless person on my right as we enterd. Determined to do good I have him money so that he could start a new life. It was a lot of money. Trust me.

Cherry: Thought their house was s’possed to be secluded. Ya know? Give em the privacy to be who they are an away from prying eyes. So why’s a homeless dude all the way over there?

Anyways then we went into the hose but then we went right back out to see Edowerd's gazeebo.

"This is the Gazebo" edowrd said pointing at the gazebo.

Asahi: And this is the Department of Redundancy Department.

It was a huge gazeebo outside near the beyutiful flowers. It was cloudy and sunny through the parts of the sky that weren't cloudy.

Cherry: So is it cloudy or not?

A single beam of light appeard and glinted down on me. It was simbolic of me being a gud person deep down [AN: STOP HATING ON REBEKA SHES NOT A BAD PURSON SHES ACSHUALLY MISUNDERSTUD!].

Briar: Ah, no. No, she’s not a good person.

Asahi: That’s just God focusing in on her so that he doesn’t miss when he brings down the meteor.

"It is a nice Gazebo!" I said happily but falsely. What edowerd didn't know is that I was starting to forgive him for his trespasses against me.

Cherry: Edward did nothin’ wrong!

Then we went inside the gazebo. It had beautiful Roman and Greek arcitecture which assured me of the Collin's wealth.

Briar: I’m noticing that she really likes to use the word ‘Assured’.

Asahi: Huh, now that you mention it, it is overused a lot.

"Now let's see the house" Alicica said. We walked past the drug lab were Alicia made her gods when she wasn't at school.

Cherry: Why struggle to find a God when ya can make one in your own basement?

Ever since she invented a cure for aids she was richer than anyone could ever imagine.

Asahi: She cured AIDS? Huh, that’s actually a really good thing. I’m glad. Though I’m worried she’s overcharging for it like America does for EpiPens.

Briar: Kind of…specific.

Asahi: Just a jarring example of American greed. An EpiPen costs over six-hundred dollars over in Cherry’s country. Here in Japan? Eight-thousand yen—er, that’s about… seventy-four dollars or so.

Cherry: Yeah… kind of a big price gap.

We went inside the Collins hose. It was HUGE. It had a TV and a kitchen and a table and everything.

Briar: As opposed to houses that don’t have a table or kitchen.

Then Alice took me up to her bedroom and gave me new clothes as she prepared her rum for having 2 people.

Asahi: Except she shares her room with Jasper, her boyfriend/husband. So really, we’re looking at her preparing her room to have three people.

Edowerd and jakub couldn't cum up because their boys and boys shouldn't be in girls rums [AN: you here that you sickos].

Briar: But Jasper, her husband, is an exception.

Anyways Alicia gave me a pink turtleneck with sleeves to the hands and a red catholic schoolgirl miniskirt and black pantyhose. It looked so god with my purple raven hare with golden streaks.

Cherry: She got to mention the rabbit every time?

Asahi: I feel bad for it, Rebecca dyed it’s fur and then painted a gold streak through it.

Tanishashanqua also equips something like that she had a white dress shirt with blue kaki jeans with shoes. Alicia stilt kept on her drug dealer uniform. After that we all made fiendship bracelets so that we would know that we would never abandoned one another ever agin.

Briar: Give it a few chapters.

Asahi: I find it amusing that Tanishashanqua and Alicia got a single sentence each for their clothes.

"Yo homie this shit be gold" tanishashanqua seed happily.

"Okay guys let's see the rest of the house" I said. If it weren't for me reminding everyone of everything we would never get places on time.

Cherry: Actin’ like yer friends are dumb, that aint a ‘good person’ thing.

Then Alice showed us the Bathroom on the basement floor. There was also a winery and a gym and a basketball curt.

Briar: That’s a big basement.

Cherry: Ya get drunk out of your mind, an then ya play some basketball.

Then on the middle basement floor there was a secret passage to the Armory. Then Alice showed us the dungeon.

Asahi: They have an armory and a dungeon? This is Sims level of basement design.

"Guys don't let Esme know that I showed you this" Alice said qualitly. We all shook our heads in assumption so she would know that we wouldn't betray.

Briar: ‘Assumption’ isn’t quite the word you’re looking for.

Asahi: I think you’re trying for ‘assured’ again.

Then we saw the videoguming rum. It was nice and big. Then I saw EDowerd's piano. Rossey's room had lots of guns and ammo and grenades. Alicia's room had lots of pink.

Cherry: Ya coulda just used the wiki to know what the house was like instead of makin’ up shit.

Cherry: Though, Rosalie’s room sounds awesome.

"This doth be Emmets Roometh" Edowerd sed as we entered Emmet's rum. It was dark with pink stripes. Emmet was listening to Lady Gage's "Born this way". I would have moshed with him to the music but only fucking stupid Goths and emo shits mosh. So instead we all danced normally.

Asahi: Ah, insulting goths and emos. Still proving that you’re not a good person.

But suddenly there was a HUGE FUCKING NOISE from the front of the house!

"OPEN UP MOTHERFUCKERS" said the door!

Briar: “How about we don’t!” the wall retorted.

"SHIT! THE COPS!" Alicia said as she got her gun out.

"No wait let me talk to them" Jacobo said. Then he took off his shirt and opened the door. There were two more cops.

Cherry: Shirtless Jacob, surefire way to get rid of all cops.

"Hello Rebecca. We are here to say sorry. We couldn't find Chadley's murderer. We thought that there might be evidence in the murder sene but now the Murder Scene has been burned down! Do you know who did it?" They asked.

Asahi: The culprit for both is Rebecca.

Jakub nodded towards me. I remember that before he said it was okay to do bad things but only if they were for good reasons. So I lied.

"It was esme." I said. Edowerd and Tanishashanqua and Alicia and Jacob all nodded chalantly.

Briar: You know I don’t quite understand why Esme is getting such hate. It’s nothing compared to the hate Bella gets, but Esme was a genuinely nice person for the most part.

"Bitch please" Someone who looked like Esme said as she went into the room. Then she took out a knife and stabbed the two cops and then ate them. It was... ESME!

Cherry: So the chick who looked like Esme and ate the cops really was Esme. Shocker.

Esme was standing there all eviliy and everything. She was dressed in a business women's suit and was easily taller than jakub. She had a black dress on too.

Asahi: Is she wearing a dress or a business suit?

Briar: She’s wearing the dress over the suit, maybe?

She had dark golden hair which went down to her back and also had leopard highlights. Her front tooth was missing but we didn't bring it up. Not even Rosalie because even Rosalie was afrade of that mega fuckking egotistical biotch Esme.

Cherry: Seriously, what did Esme do wrong here? She’s a nice person.

"By the way you bitches all need to go back to school tommorrow." Esme sed.

"What!? Why!?" Alice asked

"Shit's fucked up yo. People be dead and shit." Tanishashanqua sed.

Asahi: And whose fault is that?

"Too bad you bitches. I'm the new prinsipul and I say that school goes back tomorrow. And I hired new teechors too." She sed, pointing at ME! "ALL TO GET YOU, REBECCA! MY ENEMY! I WILL KILL YOU BEFORE THE WEEK ENDS!" she warned super evily.

Asahi: Are we ever going to get a reason for this want to kill Rebecca? Of course not.

Briar: I just assumed it was for revenge because of all the things Rebecca has done. To protect her family.

"FUCK YOU BITCH" I sed. I almost attacked her with my katana but I stopped myself because we wuld need Rosalie to take down Esme and this wasn't a good time.

Cherry: Also, Esme is a vampire an would fuck you up.

"HAHAHA! YOU WISH BITCH!" she said! "BY THE WAY I HAVE HIRD THE VULTURE TO TEACH CLASSES!" she screamed! Then she jumped out the window and left!

Briar: …Because the Volturi would happily stop their own work, their very important work as being the strongest and largest coven, and leave Italy to teach high school… all because you asked?

Asahi: Makes absolutely no sense.

"Who the fuck are the vulture" Jakub.

Cherry: Vultures are a type of food who eat dead animals.

I knew the answer becausemy friend Claritee had gotten away from them as a kid. But i deicded to let Edowerd have a moment of intelligence before he acted like a stupid fucking bitch again.

Asahi: And insulting Edward again. Really racking up those “Nice Girl” points.

"They are the vampiores who have superpowers" Edowerd send as he came.

Briar: …A lot of vampires have powers.

Briar: Actually, now that I think about it. What happened to the Cullens powers? I don’t remember any mention of Edwards mindreading powers, or Alice’s future vision.

He was now in the room. "Do not worry Rebecca weeth caneth defeateth them." He salon said cleanly.

Then Jakub left but tanishashanqua didn't because she was sleeping over with us too. I deeply but silently wondered just what that fucking bitch esme meant when she said that she would kill me.

Asahi: She means she will kill you. It’s not that deep.

But then i stopped thinking and went to bed for the night.

Cherry: You were thinkin’ in the first place?

chapter 25 - Religin class

Briar: Oh boy. Religion. Not a good sign.

Today it was tiem to go to scool unce agin. I got out my new bead in alicias rum. I luked out the window were I saw that it was snowing outsied. Wich was werd because normally in furks it doesnt snow onlee rain.

Asahi: That’s a fair point.

I mean I caem to furks for the rain in the first place so why the fuock didn't it rain more often.

Cherry: Not a fan of rain myself. I like it sunny and dry.

Briar: Agreed. Rain can be tedious. And it can make work all the harder.

I shuke my hand at Judah in the sky before gettin dresed in my new outfit for scool. I equipd my anti raep catana and my shotgun in case I had to kil esme or jessie or vitorio or james.

Asahi: At least Meowth is safe.

Wen I got to the dur with Tanishashanqua and alice I saw edowerd and Jacob. Even tho it was snowing jakub didn't hav a shirt on so I got to see his fucking sexy hot indian abs. Judah fucking dammit I wanted to do him right here but it was fucking cold out so I didnt.

Briar: And not because of your supposed vow of abstinence.

"hi jakub" I sed to him sexily as I culd.

"hi Rebecca. You luk good today." He told me. then Jakub caem.

Asahi: Gross.

We then huged in front of everyune. He was so warm so I hung on ti hum as he ran to scool. Becuz hes a werewolf he has super speed he can just taek me places. Alicia and edowerd and tansishanqua had to taek the car tho but it was oaky they sped along the road next to us. I waved to Alicia as she drove.

Briar: Vampires have superspeed, too. Or did you just forget all the vampires having any power besides immortality and blood-drinking?

Jakub droped me on the ice wen we got to scool. Hes a werewolf so he goes to scool in an indian restarant.

Asahi: I think him going to school on the reservation has more to do with him being Native American and less with him being a werewolf.

Asahi: Though that begs the question of why you keep having them go to school at Fucks High when you say they go to school at a “Resturant”.

He left but onlee after litly kissing me goodbi. Wen I luked up he was gone. I frowned. Then I saw edowerd Alicia and Tanishashanqua all cum over together. Claritee was there too.

Briar: Didn’t expect to see her again.

"yo homie wats that" Tanishashanqua sed as she ponted her ring finger over at the scool bilding. The building was still smoky and brokin from when cops jumprfd though the windows and shot at everything.

Cherry: Rude! Couldn’t even clean up first?

There was stil blud on some of the walls and edowerd and Alicia started getting off on it. Tasnishashanqua and me both thought it was fucking weird.

Briar: It’s extremely weird.

Then Edowerd and me both luked shrewdlee at wat was happening. First there was a bunch of new students. One of them was a gai the other one was a gurl. both of them were obviuslee new. They were walking right towards us at fast speds.

Asahi: If we’re lucky, they’ll run her over. But we’re not lucky.

"hi my names Rebecca whtas yours" I asked the boy.

Briar: The girl isn’t nearly as important.

The boy was a mega ultra fucking hottie but I didn't get to see his abes so I didn't no if he was actualee hotter han jakub.

Cherry: Sexualizing high schoolers. What a great thing to do.

He was realy pail but not like that foucking sick transecual caspor.

Briar: Barely into this and we’re back at it with the transphobia.

He also had gorjus blue lipstick on. He was angry then shoked and finaly calm as he spuked up.

"I am zAlec" he sed. "this is my sistor she is Kane" he sed waving his arms arund at his sister. She was just liek him onlee with bubs and a vajayjay and no you-know-what.

Asahi: Hello, Zalec and Kane.

Briar: You could have just said she looked like a feminine version of him.

She had a pink corset on with a matching dress. she luked like mary antwonet except without the wig and without looking ugly.

Cherry: Rude. I’m sure she was very beautiful.

"well okay that's niec" I sed as edowerd tasniahsshanqua Alicia and me all went to religion class wich was the first class of the dayu. But then Zalec caem too becuz it turned out that he was aslo in the clas with us.

Asahi: Run, Zalec, run while you still can.

We weer going to religion class which was taught by Carliel who is a paster of the romin orthodoks crutch.

Briar: Because Carlisle gave up a very well paying and noble job as a doctor to become a pastor and teacher.

Briar: At least Rosalie is still bringing in plenty of money to support a family of seven.

Claritee kept looking at Alec the entire time and nobuddy paid any attenshin to that hag Jane.

"hello I am fathor carlye and this is religion class" sed carlyse the fucking gorjus fathor of the collins. Calisle was even older than edowerd and alicai combined wich was really fuocking old.

Cherry: Fun fact. Jasper’s technically the second oldest. While Carlisle turned in the 1600’s, Jasper became a vamp in the 1860’s. An Edward only became a vampire in the early 1900’s.

Cherry: Long after the ‘doth’ an ‘thy’ went outta fashion

Im not sure why but he didn't have an aksent and instead just spouke ina normal fucking sexy british accent. He also was pail. Wen calyse found god he become a fathor to spred the wurd of jesus crist to everybody.

Briar: Can’t blame him for that. Perfectly normal.

Normily scool wuldnt allows him to teech becuz of the amendment but becuz hes esmes husbando he can teech religion now.

Asahi: A Religions class is not the same as religious teachings. An educational religions class tells you about religions from an academical point of view, not a spiritual one.

Asahi: So long as he isn’t trying to convert anyone and is objective, there’s no problem with a Religions class.

I thught this was fuocking STUPID BECUZ RELIGION SHOULD BE FREE and I wantd to follo Judah and not the propped up fals god befor me.

Cherry: I’m still just assumin’ Judah is who she thinks is the God of Judaism. An in that case, Judaism has the same God as Christianity.

"Here verybudy taek a free bibul for class" he sed.

"NO FUOCK YOU YOU MOTHERFUOCKER" I SCREEMD as I tuk my anti raep catana and cut the bibul in haf. Then Carlyle gaev me a new bibul becuz he sed the lord had spaers so wen calyse told us to use the bibles I said no and riped mine in half and chuckd it out the window.

Asahi: Destruction of a religious text. Another point for being a terrible person.

"who can explain this verse" he asked politly. Then he pickd on Tanishashanqua becuz hes a rasist. "tell me tasnishashanqua why guns cant make noise in this verse" he pointed at the sun and got down and prayd as he asked the question.

Briar: What has race to do with the question? And what do guns have to do with religion?

Asahi: Nothing at all.

"gun cant sound motherfucker" Tanishashanqua began. "but neither can peace." She finished.

Cherry: So deep. So beautiful.

THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN A NEW TEECHOR CAEM TO THE CLASS….. IT WAS ARROW!

Asahi: Red Arrow or Green Arrow? It’s very important.

Chapter 25 - the betrayal

Briar: Okay, who admitted they wanted to sleep with Rebecca when she asks them this chapter?

IT WAS ARROW! Arrow was a new teecher here at furks high ever sinc eseme becaem the new scool psinsipul becuz i had the kil the old one becuz he wuz evil and a vampior slayar.

Cherry: Yet he didn’t do anything evil. He just stood up an ya murdered him.

But then i stoped and luked out the window away from hi mand carlisle becuz i thought i saw something in the grass outsied.

Asahi: Such an alert attention span.

But it was just a boyd. Watever then i luked back and arrow had ogtten up n the table wich fathor carlisle was supposed to be on. He kickd all the bibuls off becuz he realizes that criteenity is fuocking stupid and that judah is the way to go i hopped.

Briar: Look. I’m not religious. I don’t believe in Gods, I think they’re just stories made up to bring comfort and help guide their morality. But I do believe in respecting what others believe in.

Briar: So in short, it’s very distasteful what’s going on right now.

"what the fuck is he doing motherfuocker" tanishahsnqua asked me. Then clarity cum to us and told us something.

"im not sure but hes the new lootenant of the scool polise" she sed.

Asahi: Do schools in America have police?

Cherry: We have resource officers, but they’re not a mini military.

I noded caerfuly. Clarity had fund out about my secret lately. She new that i kiled chadley but she also new that i didnt really meen it and that he understood me and that i was atoneing for my actions now.

Briar: She just has a very loose definition of atonement.

Asahi: How do you not ‘mean it’? You went all out in killing him.

i luked into her cristel like eys and new that i had a feind forever with her.

"WHAT THE FUOCK" cristal shouted when she saw arro who is a meember of the vulture.

Cherry: Don’t scream, he’ll notice you!

The vulture killed her parents when she was yung. Now she is a vampire becuz of them. I wuld fele bad but clarity just wont get over it so wtf am i suposed to say to someone whos complaing abut their deed parents for the millinth time for yeers.

Asahi: Being an insensitive friend. Another point for you.

Cherry: Ya don’t just ‘get over’ your parents being murdered and you being turned into a vampire.

I meen my parents lucked me in a basement for yeers but u dont see me telling peepul.

Briar: Ah, the obligatory bad childhood. Wondered when we’d get to that.

Anyways arrow opene his muth and out caem words.

"I AM HEER TO ANUNCE THAT dERE WILL BE A DANSE THIS CUMING FRIDAY NITE AND UR ALL INVITED!" arrow sed from the ceeling wich he had climbed up to sins hes a volture!

Cherry: Weird power move, but okay.

"BUT IF U DUNT CUM ULL FAIL RELIGION!" he sed evilly! "AND IF U DONT HAV A DAET U CANT CUM EETHER! AHAHAHAHA!" He sed before he turend into a bat and left the classrum.

Briar: Way to keep your vampirism a secret.

Cherry: Damn, now we’re required to attend school dances? That sucks!

Then class was over becuz father calisly had to give bat the chase becuz it actualee was arrow. Clarity Edoward Alicai Tanishashanqua Salec me and the hag Jane all waked down the hals togethur.

Asahi: Is Jane the new Bella? Because I feel bad for her.

"hey rebeca hu won the elecshin" asked alicai. "i voted for u even tho rosalies my sis dont tell her or ill fuck u up" she sed quietlee. I noded my hed.

Briar: What have you done, Alicia? You’ve doomed us all.

"um i no" sed Alex hu was a quite small boy hu was beyutiful. "it wil be anunced at the danse" he sed

"how do you no that" tanishashanqua sed

"arrow is... MY FATHOR!" he reveeled and then grabed that fuocking bitch ane's arm and ran down the hal.

Cherry: Yes, but no.

Asahi: I guess if he turned Jane and Alec, he could be considered a father.

But when he was running jane let go and aciduntly steped in rosey's peth wich rosey didn't liek. But rossey thinks shes go grate she let hur of with a warning.

"bitch dunt do that agin" she sed and dicked her gun.

Asahi: That sounds uncomfortable.

"wtf rebecca u hav a posse now u miseryabull cunt" i luked it and it was bella hu luked haf emo and haf skanc. She had white fishnte stalkings and a black waste belt and upsieddown hipster glaosses. She had a blacke and gray flannel top on too wich was why she was so emo.

Cherry: Bella, no. No, please, you don’t want to be here.

Then al of a suden ALEC CAEM BACK!

"wtf do u want ho" i asked but then remebered to be gud to repeent "im sorry, i mean wat is it". Claritee and alicai saw how hurd it was for me to be niace to that fuocking biotch so they smieled at me.

Asahi: Wow, she actually apologized to Bella. I am impressed.

Asahi: I will take one, just one point from your bad behavior tally.

"i jsut want to tell u that you suck. And stink. And can go fuock an elephent." Then she turned and walked away. This is the fuocking thanks i get for hepling to protekt her from angela yesterday god fuocking dammit.

Briar: Protect? You tried to frame her for the murder of her father, the murder you did, you tied her up in a bathroom stall,

Briar: When you thought Angela was after you, you said, and I quote; "NO GETBELLA SHES TYED UP". Then you were glad when Angela went after Bella instead of you.

I waentd to cry becuz angela hadnt kiled her but then i stoped and went insied my mind and smacked my inner biotch and told her to stop being suoch a biotch.

Asahi: That doesn’t work. Trust me, I’ve tried.

"who is that gurl" alec sed starrily.

"shes bella shes a biotch" i sed.

"shes beyutiful" he sed dreemilee.

Asahi: Thank you. Yes, she is. Thank you for noticing.

I culdnt staend the thught of him lusting ofter such a fuocking hore so i decided to set him strate.

"no u don't want to get involved with her. Right edowerd?" i asked.

"yes milday doth not wanteth toeth get involvedeth with that ho" he concluded poste hayste. But then in the moment jane saw everyting going on.

Cherry: Guys, just let him be with Bella. Stop involvin’ yourselves with other peoples lives.

"WHATS RONG WITH U AM I NOT GOOD ENOUGH ?!" she asked wile crying. It was disgusting becuz snot and teers wer runingn down her faec. Then she ran off into the girls bathrum so alicai claritee me and tanishashanqua folowed her wile edowerd went to go beet up dalec for being such a doosh.

Briar: But he didn’t do anything wrong but say Bella is beautiful? What? Do they want him to romanticize his own sister?

"girl dont worry ur beyutiful" alicai pated jahne on the back caerfully.

"yeah if he cant see your beyuty then hes not good enuff for you in the first place" i told her.

Asahi: …He’s her brother.

I felt good. Then i realized. Being good feels good. Maybe this was something i culd do afterall.

Cherry: You can be good. But will you? Probs not.

I was goign to be a better persun and leaf the lief of sin ive been folowing behind me. I went over to the last stal and there was a homeless person in it. I gave them som money. Then i gav him a poptart. It felt good!

Briar: …Why is there a homeless person just hiding in the school bathroom?

But then it was tiem for gim so we al had to go to class. We were playging dodjhal wich is a fun game were you hav to dodje shit that peepul are throwgin at you. Becuz of all my combat experiunce it was easy for me.

Asahi: Your combat experience is boiled down to you being saved by everyone and stabbing people for no reason.

That whore bella was on the other team along with clairy. When she wuznt looking clarity pushed her and she fell down and got hit 15 tiems by everune on our ttem.

Briar: Rude.

Asahi: And that point I took away for apologizing to Bella? It’s back and doubled.

Then the other teem god angry and throo shit at bela. I laughed so hard that i though i wuld pee myself but i wuldnt in public so fuock u.

Asahi: Tripled.

Cherry: She’s gonna have a few dozen points when its over.

As the gaem was almost ovar edowerd was hit so hard that he went thru the wall... It was CASPOR i meen CASMINE the transeccual boy! [AN: NASPER WENTS TO BE CALD JASMIN BECUS HE FELS MORE FEMINEN]

Briar: More power to her.

Cherry: Jasmine’s a pretty name. She’ll be a beautiful woman.

he hade thrown a hal so fast it broke eodwrds spien twice.

Asahi: Nice. Good job, Jasmine.

But then anya the bold stud up and cawt the ball! She was so beyutiful and fast and gud at editing. [AN: ANYA THIS IS U!]

Briar: Aaah, she has a new editor.

Briar: I wonder how long she will last.

she thrw a keyboard at bella and bella went ot the hospitul.

Cherry: A keyboard?! The hell?

Then i saw emmet. I went up to him and asked him how the gay thing was. It must be haerd not being with the une u luv becuz if he was with seth then saths family of wolves wuld exile the too and familee is all sath has sins his fathor dyed yesterdae.

Asahi: If you love someone enough, and if your family can’t approve of your love, then you’re better off without your family. Emmett and Seth would be better together if they are truly in love, and they shouldn’t care what the people around them think.

Anywasy then we won the gaem but lost the match becuz they trid to make us go outsied and sins most of our teem is vampiors they culdnt play. So it was me and anya. We tried but there wer too many. 16 acshually.

Briar: I’m just imagining that Rebecca got hit with so many balls she’s a walking bruise.

Cherry: I love that image.

Anyways then we went to our next class but first i waented lunch so i skiped and evryon caem with me...

Asahi: Considering the principle wants you dead, you shouldn’t be skipping.

I wuz going to the bathrum were i hade fught angela to a draw and then helped to beet her when suddenly edowerd apperd!

Briar: We read the story, Rebecca. We know that’s not what happened.

"EDOWERD WHAT THE FUOCK" i asked! this was the WOMINS bathrum!

"doth engaegeth in sex" he sed forsing himsefl on me! OH NO! WHAT WAS I GOING TO DO!?

Asahi: Wow. Edward that’s a bit forward.

Cherry: Yikes. Big yikes.

chapter 27 - the hospital bathroom

Asahi: It is mildly triggering every time she brings up how this school doubles as the town hospital.

Asahi: And now we have to specify that she’s not in the school-half’s bathroom, but in the hospital-halfs bathroom.

Cherry: This school had best be havin’ some damn good biology classes an pre-med electives.

Oh no! wat was i gunna do edowerd wuz cuming to me to moleest me?

"no stop edowerd i dun get ti" i sed crying.

Briar: Her crying is actually completely justified.

Briar: It feels weird validating what she says and does, though.

Why was edowerd tryign to do this to me? This was so fukced up!

Asahi: Maybe he’s coming to rape you for the same reasons Seth did to Bella? By your logic, what he does is absolutely justified then, after all.

Cherry: I don’t wanna see ya acting like a whiny bitch about this after how ya treated Bella when she went through this.

Teers wer runign down my face so quitlee and i wuz jsut so shoked. Edowerd tuk my rist and then throo me at the grund.

Briar: Break her spine. Break her spine.

"doth beeth a bitcheth" he sed and then smackd me.

Asahi: Sorry, she’s incapable of not being one.

Then he riped my shirt off.

"why are you doing this!?" i screemed at him. "STOP! WHY!?" He hit me agin, this time with his cleets [AN: EDOWERD IS ON THE SOCCUR TEEM].

Cherry: He hit her with his cleats? Not kicked her? What’d he do? Tear his shoes off an start smacking her in the face with em?

Then i felt sumthing red sleeping down my forehed. It was BLUD! he must have brike skin when he hit! "shit" i sed.

Asahi: It’s just a flesh wound.

Edowerds eies turned all red andshit and then hey got huded. He luged after me but i got up and dodgd his atac.

Briar: Because it’s easy dodging a vampire who has super speed and heightened reflexes.

He culdnt be resened with in his stayte and i was scrayd. I tride to run for the dur but then he apered and slamed it. Then he punched me and i flew back into the mirors. As i hit them they explouded into a bilion trilion shrads and they went everwere. Sum of it hit my faec and i culd tel i wuld get a scar.

Asahi: This is oddly cathartic. Seeing her actually get the crap beaten out of her. Not something you see often in these kinds of stories.

Cherry: I’m soakin’ as much of this as I can before she inevitably somehow beats him.

"AAAAAAAAAH" i screemed!

Briar: Alas, the bathroom was completely soundproof, and thus no one passing by in the halls could hear her screams and cries for help or the sounds of someone being beaten.

He hit me so hrad i went thru the sink too! Then before i culd reakt he had thrown me thru eech bathrum stal one bai one. There were five in tottal.

Asahi: I’m impressed she’s not broken her spine yet.

Finaly tho he tripped up and so i ran up to him with my katana and smaked him with it. I didnt want to hurt him he wuz my frend at one point so insted i just taped him withit.

Cherry: Emphasis on smacked. It’s not like you’d wanna cut the person beatin’ you up and tryin’ ta’ rape ya. No, that’d just be rude.

He lost his frenzie and then luked at wat he did to the bathromo.

"doth fucketh" he sed and then before i new it he had sped out of the rum.

Asahi: So, the cure for a frenzied vampire on a rampage is to tap them with a sword.

Asahi: As Edward said; the fuck?

I new that i had to run and find alicai and tel her wat hapened. It was hard to run tho becuz blud was gushing down thru my foreheed and it wuz gettin in my eies.

Briar: It has nothing to do with being thrown into a mirror, five bathroom stalls, and a sink resulting in broken bones and numerous bruises.

As i ran down the hal i culdtn figur owt why edowerd did that to me. I meen i no ive dun bad things in the past but this wuz just out of cacater for edowerd.

Cherry: Eeeeh… Maybe not the rape part, but ya definitely deserved the beatdown.

But then i shruged it off until i fund tanishashanqua and alicia and Jacob who was there for lunch break

Asahi: And Jacob is at their school and not the Indian restaurant he attends because…?

"what the FUCK gurl are you okay!?" Tanishashanqua asked. she tuk a cleen rag [AN" CLEEN TO PREVENT INFECSHINS] owt of her purs and then wiped my forehed with it.

Cherry: She’s honestly the most competent person here.

"alicia get out of heer u wont be able to resist the blud" Jacob sed to her. She noded her hed smoothlee and then jumped up the roof and out of scool grunds.

Briar: As you do when you’re leaving someplace.

Jacob picked me up with tanisahshanquas help and they tuk me to the hospitul wing of the scool. Then i blaked out.

When i woke up jacub was there with me. I had a yellow bandij on my hed were my wund was. Tanishashanqua was there to, but she wuz sleepign becuz sh ewas tired.

Asahi: Now be quiet, we don’t want to wake Tanishashanqua up.

"rebecca u need to tell me what is the matter" jakub sed. "who did this to you. I want to help" he sed as he culd see me.

"it was edowedr he tried to raep me" I sed cheerliee

Asahi: Weird thing to be cheerful about.

but no then sadlee becuz i had the shit beetin out of my.

Cherry: Ah, ya forgot ya ought to be sad bout that. Happens all the time.

FUCK THAT EDOWEDR GODDAMIT.

"itll be okay i'll go take caer of him" jakub sed as he got his axe out of his pockit.

Asahi: Are you tired of your belts constantly breaking when you hang your axes on them? How about the axe hitting people or the walls whenever you try to squeeze by people?

Cherry: Well, now ya don’t got to worry about any of that anymore! We’re here introducing the newest innovation in yer axeman lifestyle! The pocket-axe!

Asahi: When you’re tired of cutting down trees and killing vampires, you just fold it up and slip it right into your pocket. No more axe-idents.

Cherry: No more problems!

Asahi & Cherry: Buy yours today!

Then he howled and turned into a fury and then juped out the window of the hospitul rum.

Briar: Was he still carrying his axe?

Cherry: Aw the widdle wofly cawwied the axe in his widdle mouthy.

I wuz glad that he wuz ther to support me. I wuld support him in my own speshal way in the futor.

Asahi: “By stabbing him in the dick.”

"fuck yu you cunt" i herd. I luked up. It was BELLA! She wuz the one in the hospitul bed to the side of mine! God fuocking dammit i thught to myself slylee.

Briar: Bella, my favorite person, you’re okay!

"what!? What the fuck doyou want bella!? Cant u just leev me alone!? JUDAH FUOCKING DAMMIT U WEER ALWAS SUCH A FUCKING BITCH TO ME I HATE YOU" i screemd in fuory. Uh oh. I was supoed to be gud.

Cherry: Ya never been good.

"thas hard to do when u do shit like KILL MY FUOCKING DAD YOU CUNT" she screemed even loudlier.

Asahi: She has a very valid point.

Briar: Can’t argue with her reasoning.

I gasped loudlee so that she culd understand my shouck.

"ur just jelus that chardly always luved me mora than you" i sed furiouslee!

Cherry: An you repaid that love by killin’ him.

She was so shucked that she culdnt even say anyting to that. Then she luked down an troddin. Wich ment that she new i was rite. Wich ment that i weon.

Briar: Doesn’t justify the murder.

Asahi: We all know Charlie really loved Bella best, she’s just full of herself.

I got up out of my bead and went to the hospitul rum bathrum. Y didnt this victoree feel gud tho?...

Cherry: Oh, God!

Cherry: Are ya learning empathy?

As i steped into the bathrum to go tinkle my combat sens tingld.

Asahi: “Look mom, I can rhyme! Are you proud of me, now?”

Sudenly i dodj roled out of the atac in the smal bachrum onlee to see... ANGELA THE VAMPIOR! She was back!

Briar: Why do all these vampires love attacking girls in the bathroom? Edward did it once, and this is Angela’s third Bathroom Strike.

And she had a new BLAK CATANA! And she had triedto kill ME WITH IT! I ran out of the bathroom at my ful potenshil and assumd fightign pose in frunt of bella.

Asahi: Wait, are you attacking Bella? Defending Bella? Using Bella as a human shield?

"shit motherfucker!" tanishashanqua screemed!

Cherry: Oh, ya woke up to the fight, but not to Bella and Rebecca screamin at each other?

She got out her gun and poiynted it at the biotch angela. We wer gonna protekt bellas lief and also my life. I new that it was heer that i wuld maek up for my sins and devowlee folo judahs plan.

Briar: I can’t believe it.

Briar: They’re actually protecting Bella? Bella? Did someone replace Rebecca with a clone? A good clone?

Asahi: I don’t believe this is going to last, but I want it to.

As angela the vampiore stuck out the bathroom we prepard!

"u evaded me twise so now yuo both shall DIE" angela screemed! Then she LUGED!

Cherry: Oh, no! She luged! How will anyone survive?

okay i no i sed that i wuld reply to ny reviows but srsly

Jason Bartholomu 12/4/12 . chapter 16

Do you even lift?

lift what i dunt get it what the fuock is rung with u pepul

Cherry: Ya don’t get the most iconic an basic of memes? Disappointin’.

chapter 28 - Rebecca & Bella vs Angela

Then she LUGED! I gasped wile tryign to deflekt angelas atack with my catana. She was very skiled but i think that i was more thern a match for her wile we were in the hospital rum.

Asahi: No. No you’re not.

"SHIT HOMIE GEDOWN" tanishashanqua SCREEMD as she usd her gun at angela. I was fsat enuf to dodge the bullits but if i hadnt bene then i wuld be ded.

Cherry: Considerin’ how fast bullets move… that’s physically impossible.

Angela didnt tho and she got shotted at leest 4 times in the neck. But she didnt say anything like i expected her to so it was werd. She jsut tryed to stab me and tanishashanqua and bella sum more so u no wat? Angelas a fuocking bitch.

Asahi: Takes one to know one.

Suddenly anya the bold ran in wile eeting cheetos and poptarts and luked at us but she was so scray by wat she saw that she ran out. [AN: ANYA GET UR AKT TOGETHUR UR SUPOSED TO BE EDITING NOT EATING CHEETOS U FATTI]

Briar: That’s one way to chase away your editors.

Asahi: I’m surprised it took this long before she lashed at her. I can assume that after this chapter she won’t be editing for you anymore.

but then angela threw her sword like a boomeragn and it cut off anya the bolds arm so TAEK THAT U CAN GET UR ARM BAECK WHEN U START WURKING AGAIN!

Cherry: Yeah, no one in their right mind’s gonna deal with you when ya do shit like that.

"Bella u need to get out of here we caent hold her off for loung!" i sed wile trying to be a gud person. It was hard to prove it tho becuz there wer no homeliss pepul to give poptards to but whatevr.

Asahi: I think you need to understand that doing good deeds because you want to be seen as ‘good’ isn’t the same as doing good deeds because it’s the right thing to do.

Anyways then angela smacked tanishashanqua on the hed but she didnt stop THERE! then tanishashanqua luged at bella but i blocked the atack. Tasniahsnqua then tuk out a nife and went for Angela!

Briar: Tanishashanqua, you’re having some trouble remembering who your enemy is, aren’t you?

"YOU WILL NOT STOP ME!" Angela screemed but then tanishashqnau stabed her in the gut with her getto nife and then i pushed her owt the window of the hospitul rum. Luckilee the rum is fiev storys up so angela had a long fal to deel with.

Cherry: It’s rather quick when ya take into account the speed ya fall at.

"we need to escape befor she climsb back up here" i sed serverlee. I luked ovar at Bella and Bella was just fuocked up becuz of this drama and shit.

"WHAT THE FUOCK IS GOIGN ON!?" she screemed.

Briar: Very valid response.

"luk motherfuocker that bitch is gonna kill you too if we dont run so u can eether stay here or run with us to be abel to survive" tanishashanqua sed.

"she wuz the one who atacked us in the bathrum stal" i sed to clarifye the situation.

Asahi: So long as you avoid going into any bathrooms, you’ll be safe.

Bella thught for a secund and then nodded her head.

"okay, ur right." She sed.

"we need to get away and fast" i sed as i locked the windows so that when angela tries any spiderman shit to get back into heer it wuldnt wurk.

Briar: You could always break the glass.

"how are we going to do that!? Shes so strong a powerful!" bella sed wile starting to cry a litle bit.

"Theres only 1 persun strong enuf to take on angela for shure" tasniahshanqua begined. "Rosey." I nodded my hed becuz this was a relly good idea. Thank gudness tasniahsnqua is such a gud friend with gud ideas.

Asahi: Thank God Tanishashanqua has the one brain cell this group shares.

"does anybody have a car that we can use to get to the collins house?" i askd the too.

"i do!" bella sed and then we all went to the parkign lot to get into beds fuocking uglee truck. Even tho it was uglee and i haet it with all my pashin it was savign my lief now so i maed sure to remember to fix it when this was all ovar.

Cherry: This is so weird. She’s… growin’? As a person?

Cherry: Am I dreamin’?

I culd start to append for my sins by treeting the things in my life better. As we were gettign into the truck, we herd a fucking obnoxshis screech.

"GET BACK HERE BITCHES!" It was ANGELA! She was on a moturcycle! She tuk out a pistol and started to shoot bullits at us so we got into the truck fastlee.

Briar: Motorcycles… are like metal horses… that’s kind of cool.

Cherry: Motorcycles are awesome, I defs’ want one.

Tasniahsnqa and I got into the back bed [AN: THATS WERE U PUT THE KARGO AND SHIT IN A PIKUP TRUCK]

Asahi: I’m pretty sure most everyone knows what the truck bed is.

and asumed fihgting posishin. I tuk out my shotgun and shotted it at angela wile tanishahsnaqua tuk out her getto pistol and also shotted it.

"GO GO GO GO!" i screemed and then bella tuk off out of scool grounds and around the town while angela followed us. Agenla tried to shoot at the car but tanishashanqua shot back and i deflekted bullits with my anti-raep catana wile shooting with my shotgun.

Cherry: I never did like the ‘deflects bullets with a sword’ trope people love doin’ in anime.

It was hard, to sto pthe bullits, but i had to protekt bella, the driver of this vehicol. but then Angela activated her turbo button and then she was speeding up so fast that theer wouldnt be a chanse for us to escape! It was as if she had a jet in that fucking moturcycle!

Cherry: That’s pretty cool, actually.

"Bella!" i screemed! "Speed up! We arent lusing her!"

"IM TRYING DONT DISTRAKT ME" bella screemed. I meen i understand her srtress but hello tanishashanqua and i wuldnt let anything happen to her. But whatever she desruves the beenfit of the doubt.

Asahi: This is so weird.

Asahi: I’m not complaining, though.

We sped up rally fast and then Bella tuk the truck out of the town and into the windign roads behind the town. There were lots of trees everywhere and it began to raen liek crazee so i felt at home.

Cherry: There’s this magical barrier that kept the rain out of the town.

Suddenlee a coip car starded to get in on the chase too! We were tryign our best to deflekt bullits but then the fuockign cops tried to drive US off the road insted of angela!

"Tanishashanqua the cops are alyed with Angela!" i sed! We were doomed unless we culd get those biotches off our backs!

Briar: Maybe it’s because you killed one of their own?

"i got this motherfucker" tanisahsnqua sed and then she shot the cop driving the car in the hed and he died and his car went off a cliff and exploded.

Asahi: Ah, another murder. Good job.

Then we went back to doign what we were doign before.

"YOU WONT ESCAPE EASILEE!" angela screemed and then she tuk her gun and aymed it at the tire of the truck and SHOT THE BULLIT! IT HIT! THEN IT MADE A NOISE! Tanishashanqua and me almost fell out but before i new it Angela had use d the swurve to JUMP INTO THE TRUCK WITH US! FUCK!

Briar: This is equally unexciting and exciting. It’s kind of scary how she managed that.

"FUCK YOU" i screemed and engayged her in one on one swordfightign. It wuz her black catana versis my anti rape catana and it luked liek i was losing!

Cherry: Surprisin’ absolutely no one.

I just culdnt keep up with her enhansed vamprie powers! FUCK! She then pujnched me in the boob and smacked me!

Cherry: Ouch, boob punch. Low blow.

Then she luged for tanishansqua! NOOOO!

"FUUUUUUUUCK" tanishahsnqua screemed as angela cut off her pistol hand with her evil black catana! Then she picked up one of my onlee friends and threw her out the back of the truck wile bella was driving it at 120 miles per hours!

Asahi: Ah, man. You killed off one of the few interesting characters.

It was tramatic taek my wurd for it.

Briar: I’ll have to.

"Bitch please this is still my fucking turf ur on" someone sed. IT WAS ALICIA! She was drivign a sports car and had caght tanisahsnaqua's bodee with the hood of her car.

Cherry: That’s actually gonna be pretty painful.

Asahi: At least Alicia is here. Now they stand a chance of survival.

Tanishashanqua got into the car wile alicai shot at angela frum the sports car. I new then that this wuz my chase to get a hit in on angela so i struck and almost nocked her off the speedign truck! Btu then she hung on and overpowerd me.

Cherry: Surprisin’ no one.

"No matter how many of u weeklings show up I will still rain supreme!" she sed evilee! Alicia used her vampire strength to shoot many bullits at angela but angela also was a vampiore so she dodged them like a profesional. But no! some of the bullits that missed angela wuz going to hit bella! I tried to dodge into the atac but i onlee tuk too bullits!

Briar: It’s so jarring that she’s throwing herself into danger to protect Bella. Is this the same Rebecca?

"SHIT" i screemed. I had faild and culdnt protekt bella. Even tho i akt like i hate her shes secretely always been my role model and i shuldve been nicer to her.

Asahi: Know what that is? Growth.

A singul teer drop fell frum me faec as i relized wat was goign to hapen. I herd a screem from bella, and suddenlee the car went off the side of the roed and into the wuds. Angela and i went flyign over 70 feet in the aeir along with the truck. As we wer in midair bella fell from the truck and angela stabed me in the stomick, but not before i shoved my antiraep catana into her nee!

Cherry: so we got three deaths?

Cherry: At least one from the 70 feet fall.

She kickedd me and i went flying even furthor. But then as i hit a tree on the way down, i herd an exploshin. Then everything went blaeck as i fell...

Briar: That was the sound of your insides turning to mush.

Chapter 30: woods

Cherry: The less successful knockoff of “Into the Woods”.

I woke up in the fucking awful rain becuz seriously people I dont love it THAT much I mean geeze.

Briar: With how much you were saying you love it, now you don’t?

Anyways my head really fucking hurt because i had been sent through a fall. I didnt know where Angela was because she had gone flal too but I knew that if I honed myself that I could find bella.

Asahi: If Bella’s dead, we riot.

I found my shotgun and katana and put then in the ground int he forest I was in. It was almost dark. I could tell ecause the sun was setting. Time had passed. I cliped my hands together and prayed to Judah that something would guide me way. Then I opened my eyes and saw the Elf Grandfather who was pointing at the car wreck with Bella underneeth it!

Briar: Suddenly there are elves?

Cherry: That’s not the weirdest thing, oddly enough.

I ran to the reck and saw that Bellas hand was the only thing not under her fucking trashed truck. It was burning and smoke and shit and the trees were going to burn down soon.

Asahi: Save her or perish.

"Bella dont worry I'll save you!" I screemed because I was a good person and shoved the truck with all my mite. It was no use those I couldn't gain ground against the truck because of Newton's laws against moving objects! [AN: FUCK YOU NEWTON]

Cherry: Newton had nothing to do with this.

"rebeeca you goddamn it fucking ugly stupid whore help me goddamn you and fuck this" she whinied at me which was totally unhelpful right now I mean c'mon I'm trying to concentrate at the moment.

Briar: I’ll admit, Bella, not the best time to complain.

"GODDAMNIT IM TRYING" I screamed at her. I mean if she didn't have such a fucking huge truck this wouldnt be tough the thing ways like 15 tons. But then my combat sense tingled and I looked behind me and suddenly ANGELA APPEARED in the sky and and she started to use her sword in me!

Asahi: Phrasing.

Cherry: She said what she meant. The swords in her.

"I'll kill you! HIYAH" She screened as she luged over and over again. I tried to fight back but it was hard because bella was there nad she was the targit and I was trying to protect Bella but Angela used and I couldn't truck!

Briar: She couldn’t truck?

Briar: Is that some modern age slang?

"WHAT YOU SAY TO ME!?" I screamed as I punched Angela's breasts in the fight.

Cherry: Another boob punch!

It was a ground blow but it was all I could do to stay in front. "You're a monster Angela and I won't let you harm people!" I screemed harder this time! But then Angela jumped into the air with her Katana and cut my shotgun in half! Oh shit! I was so fucked!

Asahi: Well, it was nice knowing you, Rebecca.

Asahi: Not really. But, hey, good riddance.

"IF I AM A MONSTER THEN I WILL BE THE MONSTER COACH!" She screemed while flying. "THE FIRST IN MANKIND AND THE FIRST ALL OVER THE WORLD!"

Cherry: Ya might not be the first monster, but ya might be the first monster coach.

Then she stopped flying right on top of me. As bella was getting her face burned and crushed by the Car Angela just kept stabbing me and stabbing me with her Katana of death until She picked me up with it and impaled me.

Briar: I’ll be fine with Bella dying if it means Rebecca dies as well, just saying.

"AAAAAAAAAA" I screemed in shire agony! THERE WAS A FUCKING SWORD IN ME AND SHE WAS SPINNING ME AROUND WILE I WAS ON IT!

Briar: That gives me some ideas.

She was just to strong. This was the final line for me and bella. None of my friends were around to save me. Jacob was after Edoward who was running away from Fucks and Alicia was with Tanishashanqua wherever the fuck they were and And nerd Clarity was actually in that the school.

Asahi: I forgot Clarity existed.

Cherry: Same.

I tried to take a breath but it was hard because Angela was using a sord to mvoe me.

Then all of a sudden a gunshot went off and Angela threw me off to the sword with great power! She cut the bullet in half and we both looked up! It WAS CHOCOLOVE!

Briar: Never mess with a stripper.

"Angela stop" he said while looking like a teachor.

"Why the fuck shuld I?" She asked as I was there and on the ground almost dead and Bella was almost dead to. She was about to snap my neck so it was good that Chocolove arrived to stop her!

Cherry: I’d be more concerned bout all the holes you got.

"Because" he said wile pointing at Angela the Vampire! "When you were alive, I WAS YOUR FATHER ANGELA!" She then started to cry becuz she was just confused by touching it all. Then she got fucking angry!

Asahi: What a twist!

Briar: I’d be crying tears of confusion, too. This is pretty nonsensical.

"YOU LYING FUCKER" she screemed and then tried to stab him but Chocolove's forcefeld stopped her from comign close to him. "AAAAAA" she screemd as she went flying backwards into an other grandfather elf tree.

Briar: The poor elf-tree.

"ITS TRUE" he screemed! "YOUR MOTHER IS NONE OTHER THAN RENNY!" Everybody at the sene gasped because of the revelatin! If angela was renny's dohter then that meant that... "YES!" Chocolvoe screemed! "THAT MAKES ANGELA BELLA'S SISTER!"

Asahi: Clearly Renée had the true harem.

And then Angela started swearing so much that I'm not even gonna fucking write it becuz seriously it would take up like 5 pages of text.

"you bitch" Angeal screamed and then broke down on the ground.

"Its true their insides are made of the same blood..." he said. "My daddy blood".

Asahi: Ugh, I hate the word ‘Daddy’.

Cherry: Wouldn’t they be sharin’ Renée mommy blood?

Asahi: Don’t say ‘mommy’, either.

And then all of a sudden my pain wouldn't release because Angela had still stabbed me. But then something amazing happened that saved my life that I will never forget!

"HOMING MISSLE BOMB STRIKE" sed a voice! The voice belonged to Alec!

Asahi: You’re still here?

All of a Sudden Angela went missiling up into the air like some sort of flying projectile and left the atmosfear. Jane was there too but she was a had so it didn't matter.

Cherry: Wow, rude.

"What are you doing here you fools?" Chocolove asked

"I am here to save Bellanita and Rebeccadora [AN: THOSE ARE THEIR FULL NAMES]

Briar: I don’t know about Rebecca, but Bella’s full name is Isabella Marie Swan.

from sertin death" Alec said. "They are too close to the collin compound and you know what lies in there! We must not let Esme see them!" And then Jane nodded and made a incantation to say "HOLY" and then the truck got up and rolled over and away from Bella so that we culd save her.

"Don't worry" Alec said to me. "My powers sent her to the MOON" he screamed.

Briar: Well, we know she’ll be back on earth in an hour, tops.

"I won't let you ruin my plans!" Chocolove said with anger and blood dripping from his voice and then his forsefield grew to ten times the original amount! "Esme will hear about this blatant betrayl of our plans and then you will suffer the consequences!"

Asahi: I’m sorry? What?

Briar: The stripper is evil, what a shocker.

"what are you saying Chocolove!?" I managed to ask wile bleeping out onto the forest ground.

Cherry: I’ll give ya props for being awake after all that blood loss.

"I wont asnwer that because it would spoil my plans" he said. And then he made to summon a Lance and equiped it to do battle with.

"Well too bad they are our friends and we will save them" jane sed finally speaking up! Then she made a ninjutsu sign and then screamed "TELEPORT" and the four of us (Me, Bella, Jane, and Alec) teleported away from Mr. Chocolove!

Asahi: What? This is Naruto now?

Chapter 31: Return to School

Suddenly like as if were teleported we were in the school. I was there with my wounds and Bella was there with her face and shit all burned and alec and Jane were there to.

"We will take Bella to the facility" said Alec. He puked up Bella with amazing speed and pushed everyone out of his way to the hospital. Jane cried like the hag she is and then teleported away.

Cherry: This fic is makin’ me ship Alec/Bella.

So then I had to go to class to find claritee because she was the only one who could be my friend since Jacub was in the pursuit and Tanishashanqua and Laicia wer .

Briar: I’m impressed she is able to spell Tanishashanqua the same every time.

Then I looked up at the clock and there was enough time left in the day to go to my next class wich was a math class. I hate math because I'm not very good at it because of Newton [AN: FUCK YOU AGAIN NEWTON].

Cherry: Newton’s got nothin to do with ya sucking.

Asahi: I think you skipping the rest of your classes would be justified at this point.

"I'm sorry I'm late sir I was busy fiting angela" I said to the teachor who was suppled to be Mr Clearwater but I acted a gasp when it wasn't! It was Hasmes the man whose arm was missing after he consumed Clear water!

Briar: Hasmes is still alive? Wow.

"PAY ATTENTION TO THE BOARD REBECCA" screemed Hames the Vampire teacher of my Calculus class as I perfectly sat to my seat. We were learning things like how to divide funktions and trickonometry. "YOU ARE THIEVING KNOWLEDGE FROM THE OTHER STUDENTS" he screamed wile waving chalk and shit around the class. I don't get why I even try its not like I'm asian or anything so fuck this shit.

Asahi: Wow. Racist.

Cherry: Everyone’s gotta learn math, deal with it.

"Psst Rebecca want to buy some weed" sad the boy to the left of my seet! IT WAS SERKADES! [AN: SERKADES IS ONE OF THE SNERKERS].

Briar: Who from the what?

Asahi: No idea.

He was a sit there and selling drugs to me and everything! I went all D: and then he Took out the dope and waved it in my fucking face. "I need it to pay for my props" he tried to say slidely.

"Mr Hames serkades is selling drugs!" I told the teechor but he was so busy reducing Clitoria that he didn't notice.

Cherry: Ouch, clit reduction in a classrooms gonna be painful.

"No I don't want any of your fucking drugs so stop before alicai sees you beside I am too far above the inner fluence" I told him. I was trying to help I mean if Alica saw this shit she would fuckign kill him for being on her turd.

Briar: Fair point.

"Your strong so I can not do anything to encourage you" sad Serkades because he just kept on trying to sell. "I'll call you when I'm selling cheap" he sed and swiped me his phone number for texting because nobody calls anymore.

Cherry: That’s a lie.

I riped it up because I was done being a bad person and I didn't even try to stab him so I felt good about myself just like it should be. In fact I was going to tell on him and do the right thing so he could sort his life out. Judah would want that.

Asahi: It’s so weird seeing Rebecca be somewhat good.

"Bye mr Hames I am going to the School police" I told Hames as I got up and left and he just stuck his middle finger up at my because she was busy kussing his lady bitch's face to notise his job. I walked down the fucking empty halls and located Arrow's room since his is a liutenant [AN: THE SCHOOL POLICE ARE IN ARROWS ROOM].

Briar: So this school has a hospital and police.

Briar: All it needs is a bank and it’s a town of its own.

But I heard mouning going on inside so I quickly opened the door to investigate!

"WHAT THE FUCK" I SCREAMED because I was scared. My old fiend Clarity Etude Symphonia was on the desk laying there and Arrow was on top of her as a Bat masticating on her body! He just kept going and going it was fuckign sick. There was blood everywhere like a volcano in Italy.

Asahi: Disgusting.

Cherry: Repulsive.

Briar: Revolting.

"Get off of her what the fuck are you doing!?" I screemed and took out my Katana and threw it across the room but the Bat dodged and I tried to get but I could because bats and its wings kept fapping.

Briar: How the heck is it still jerking off while it’s flying?

Asahi: I don’t think we want to know.

"You disgusting shit I will kill you" the bat said using Ekolocation to translate thoughts into me! "I have killed this worthless hunam and drained her of all of her blood" he translated loudly!

Cherry: That’s not how echolocation works.

"You sick fucker your wrong I am a vampire too!" Clarity screemed as she got up to kill Bat but he stopped her and went through her breasts to get inside her body! "FUUUCK" Clarity screemed!

Cherry: I’m scared but what’s goin’ on?

"I am now inside her body it is warm like a volcano's bakemeat. I shall nest in here" he said and then closed the entrance to her body so that he would be safe.

Asahi: By the looks of it, we’re in Alien now.

"Arrow stop trying to live inside of Clarity!" I screemed to protect my friend! I wanted to kill him but I couldn't not without killing clarity too.

"There is no use Rebecca" Clarity said now crying a lot not as much as Bella when Chadley had died but more than when Bella cried over Mikes dead body.

Briar: Bella is a good gauge of how sad you are. Are you “My dad died” sad or “This kinda-friend who won’t take a hint died” sad?

"He will nest in me and you cannot harm him without killing me first" she sed.

Asahi: Time to take one for the team, Clarity.

"Clarity you are my friend we will solve this predicament" I sad. "Esme will pay for this!" I also sad this time waving my fists towards the sun.

Briar: What does Esme have to do with this?

Cherry: She’s just a mom who wants to raise kids.

"No Rebecca you must know what I found out before…" She sad as she drew her gun from her bra. She was shaking because she was losing control of her body to the parasite Arrow inside.

Cherry: Aren’t most men parasites?

Asahi: Hey!

Briar: Rude.

Cherry: Bad joke. M’bad.

"The volutre are a diversion… Esme hired them to kill anyone on Cocolove's trail…" She was puking blood now because Arrow was eating her from the inside. She took out a jar of holy water. I was crying it was so traumetric.

Briar: Probably should see some therapy.

"He is the masterind behind everyting and he is connected to everything… You were not always supposed to…" she stopped and then her eyes rolled back like some weird chuky shit.

Asahi: Chocolove is the beginning and end, he is everything and nothing, knows all, sees all.

Cherry: Chocolove the secret main villain?

"NO! CHARLITY YOU ARE MY BESTEST FRIEND DON'T DO THIS TO YOURSELF THERES NO GOING BACK!" I scremed but it wasn't enough. "IF YOU DO THIS THAN YOU WILL BECOME THE GERATEST MONSTER OF THIS WORLD OF THEM ALL!"

Briar: Exaggerating a bit there.

"URGHGHGH GOODBYE" Clarity barfed and then she chugged the entire jar of holy water. Then her entire insides caught the fire and everything except for her bones and muscles and skin burned up she no longer had orgins to donate in case someone was going to dye.

Asahi: A vampire probably can’t donate their organs, either.

"AHAHAHAHA NOW I CONTROL HER!" Arrow said from inside Claritee as he piloted her like a giant mecha like in one of those animees. "IT IS I THAT CAN GRASP THE GERATEST MONSTER BY BEING THE GREATEST MONSTER OF THEM ALL!" But the clarity I knew was dead inside arrow had masticated into her and then she had commited to suicide by drinking water and now she was hollow. "THANK YOU REBECCA YOU MADE ALL OF THIS POSSIBLE" He screemd and then using Clarity he ran out of the Office.

Cherry: So Rebecca is the final villain.

Cherry: That makes more sense.

I ran out of the office too but I was crying because today had been really bad. Then Alicia and Tanishashanqua and Jacub and Edowerd all came to me. Except edowerd couldn't talk because he was typed up and his mouth was closed with duck tapes.

Asahi: Ah. Jacob caught him.

Asahi: Good doggy.

"What is wrong Rebecca?" Said Jacub. He helped me close very sexily I could even felt his nipples through his shirt.

Briar: Stop sexualizing him.

"Clarity just died" I sad.

"Aww that stinks" Said Alicia which reminded me of smoking da Mary J.

"By the way that fucker Serkades is trying to steal your turf where were yoy anyways!?" I questioned while flapping my raven hair with golden streaks in the dramatic sexy wind.

Cherry: Ah, was wonderin’ when we’d get the hair in the wind.

Asahi: The sexy wind, mind you.

"I was getting a new hand" sad Tanishashanqua who now had a robot hand sort of like Luke Skywinkers from Revenge of the Jedis. "The surger was difficult but I pulled it through" she said.

Briar: Oh, cool.

Cherry: That’s badass!

"THAT FUCKER" Alicai said and took off into the school with a gun equipped to use on SErkades that turd. Alicai would settle him straite.

"But anyways Rebecca why are you so beat up" Jacub asked.

"Because wile you were away Angela attacked me Bella and Tanisha and then Bellas truck fell and Chocolove stopped the killings!" I told him. He nodded very quickly at first but then stopped and did it slowly. Suddenly it became raining and thundering outsied so I felt at home.

Asahi: I’m surprised she didn’t yell at him for not being there.

Cherry: That sounds like something Rebecca would have done.

"We need to investighat Chocolove" Jacub said. Tanishashanqua wasn't sure at first since this was her dad and this meant that he was a lying cheator on her mother because shes a year older than angela (Tanishashanqua is 18) so now she had a reason to rebel.

Briar: Yikes, I feel bad for Tanishashanqua, in this case.

Briar: Her dad cheated on her mom.

"Jacob you go find Alicia and do that." Tanishashanqua said while taking control of the situation.

Asahi: Tanishashanqua is the true boss here.

She was preparing to distance, I could really tell. Jacub ran off and then Edowerd Tanishashanqua and me were left. "We need to go find Alec and Jane, some is telling me that they are more into this than we think." Tanishashanqua said and with that we were off to go an interrogate the two.

Cherry: Well, they are part of the Volturi.

AN: I have decided on what I will do after kronicals I will write a prequel telling of how angela became the vampire bitch that she is today I hope you all red it when it comes out BUT THIS ISNT ADVETISING SO DON'T TAKE IT THAT WAY GEEEZE

Briar: Why would you insert it in the middle of the story?

Briar: Why not at the end?

Cherry: Why ya think we want to know how she became a vamp?

But Tanishashanqua and jacub couldn't do it so they caem back. Then we were the 5 crusdaers again because clarity was a robot for arrow who was piloting her quickly. The 5 of us were there to crusade against esme and shit so we went out to buy dresses and suits for the guys for the upcoming school dance.

Briar: That’s nice of them, their buying the guys dresses and suits.

I had a feel that esme would attack then because she is a mega fucking bitch who ruins everything he touches.

Asahi: Esme just wants to be a mom and have a family.

We went to the market district [AN: ITS FAR FROM THE GETTO ONE TANISHASHQNA DOESN'T COME OUT HERE MUCH BECAUSE SHES POR]

Briar: Thanks for emphasizing.

to buy fresses for the dance. I saw one that was fucking beautiful with maching pink laces on the gown and Alicai told me to buy it. But at first I didn't have any money but then I remembered that when I killed Chardly I stole his wallt too so I opened that up and took the money from it.

Asahi: Wow.

Asahi: You kill the man and steal from him. That’s low.

I felt bad for about a second I mean it was his fault he dyed the stupid fucker

Cherry: Rude.

so I took the money and began to use it to pay for the dress when then I saw who the casher was!

"CHADLEY WHAT THE FUOCK" I scremed! Jacub Edowedr Alicai and Tanishahsnqua all looked amazed and then scared and then worried. "I thought you died" I sed crying because this was so emenstionul for me.

Briar: Wait? Charley is alive?

"actuall you killed me swine" he sed.

Asahi: She is swine. That is true.

I looked at him and he was a vampire just like Edowerd and Alicai and Esme and Angela and all the others.

"WHAT THE FUCK YOU FUCKER YOU HAVE TO PAY FOR THAT" I screemed! I mean geeze he didn't have to go do that if he was alive all along.

Cherry: Your logic astounds me.

"But wait we flamed the house" edowerd spoke to say. "how can you be?!"

"Esme saved me fool she took my body and vamped it out" he sed and then he stuck his arm out at me and graped my throat. It really fucking hurt but not as much as the payne in my heart from having to have to put down chadley again for being an abomeration.

Briar: For starters, this is justified, you killed him. It’s called revenge.

Briar: Second. Abomination? Wow, that means Alicia and Edwards are abominations, too.

I cut off his hand with my Katana and then engaged him in combat.

"fuck you" I said and then cut his head off. His body fell.

Asahi: Can’t you just let the man live?

"Yay way to go" Jacub chwrd and me but then he got all scared all of a sudden! "Rebecca look at the scene!" he said trying to warn me! I looked back and there was the head! It was floating and being!

Cherry: Don’t you hate it when heads start floatin?

"WHAT!? BUT I KILLED YOU!" I SCREAMED

"you did not kill me hard enough fool" he sed and then tore my dress in half with his zombie toeth. "Besides before I die I have to tell you the secret of what Esme is going to kill you with!" he scremed so then I stopped trying to kill him to listen. If he had disciplined earlier none of this would have ever happened it was all fucking chadley's fault!

Asahi: She is a pro at shifting the blame.

Briar: It’s amazing, really.

"what" I sed huffing expectantly

"Esme is going to mutate the town using radio waves from the radio station! And if you do not stop her than she is going to nuke everything!"

Briar: Mutate and then nuke? What point is there in the mutations, then?

then he finished and opened a portal and flew his head in and then the portal closed as I called him a fucker because right now hes being one goddamit.

"We have to fight aggrsively Esme will mutate the entire town if we do not stop the radio from spreading! She has the nuke and she will use it if we lose!" Alicai said taking out her gun. Tanishashanqua also took out her gun Jacub took out his ax and Edowerd his nales as the Crusdaer Crew got ready for battle.

Cherry: Why’s Edward all in the clear now? Did we miss an apology or explanation?

Briar: I don’t think we did.

We left the store but before that I all got my dance dress on because the chaser was dead wich meant free clothes!

Cherry: That’s not how that works.

When we got to the outside Esme was flying in the air. The sky was green from the radio's waves. Rose was flying too because she can be a fucking bitch.

"SUCK ON MY VOLCAN BAKEMEAT REBECA YOU SHIT MUFIN" Esme sop and Rose confom it

Asahi: Volcan… Bakemeat…?

Asahi: What the Hell?

That's when her army of zombies appeared and shit went residint evil on us the zombies were under esme's control so when she told them to attack they listened.

Cherry: She’s gonna make me hate RE, ain’t she?

Anya the bold and serkades were there too. But you know what fuck this shit I'm tired of these fuockers.

"FUCK YOU" I said as I took out my katana and cut off anyas head because guess what IM TRIED OF YOU RUNNING MY STORY WITH YOUR BAD INFLICTS ON EVERTHING GO BACK TO TH WHOLE YOU CLIMBED FROM!

Briar: Because that is mature.

Briar: Real mature.

Then I saw serkades but it was fine because Edowedr chopped his dick off with a chainsad they got from alicai.

"that is is Esme, Rebecca, we cannot die" I was told but there was too much fighting I culdnt tell who sed it. Whoever they are they were right. I took a gun from serkades because drug dealers have guns and shot it at Esme but her shield pooped up and she burned the shot to the ground! I fell distressed and dazzled because what the fuock can I even do in this situation.

Asahi: You can die.

"REBECCA!" Jacub shouted from afar "I BELIEVE IN YOU!" and with that I was better. Alicai my friend came running towards me wile Jacub and Tanishahsanqua fought zombies and shit.

"To defeat her you need to rock the fuck out" alicai told me as she handed me a rocking electic gitar made out of diamond from mars all for an awesome solo wile she took out an expensiv blood-ruby encrusted gold fiddle and got ready to fuck the rock out of me.

Cherry: I’m sorry? What?

Asahi: Did this turn into a fiddle contest with the Devil?

"take this… it is… a jew!"

Briar: A…Jew?

I looked at esme in the sky and punked the fuck out. We busted into a song that pursed the heavens of everything it had and bellowed to hell itself and then the core of the planet causing the molten iron in it to rush out like a Vulcan and bake the fucking shit off of esme's face which it did. The earth shattered in half braking apokalypticly because of my beautiful lyrics.

Briar: I don’t think destroying the world is a good thing.

Asahi: It’s definitely not a good thing.

"AAARRRGGGHHH REBECCA!"

"YES!?" I screemed to esme who was being fired and burned by the firey hot magma of my sin

Cherry: Ya admit it’s a sin, at least.

"FUCK YOU" she screemd and then teleported away but Rose didn't she got caught in the flames of ym torture and then the olten iron became a hand which dragged her down into hell.

"REBECCA SAVE ME" she screemed so I stopped my solo but it was too late Rossey was sicked into a molten spicy hellish land that is pretty bad but not as bad as what goes on in my heart mot of the time. Fuck you if you don't thnk Rebecca is deep.

Asahi: I guess fuck me.

Cherry: She’s bout as deep as a puddle.

Anyways after that we went home because seriously I was fucking done with everything today my dress was burned clarty was a piloted and angela was on the moon and now rossey's in fuckign hell which is just bad but I secretly thinks that she deserves it.

Asahi: Really racking up those ‘good person’ points.

Cherry: Ah, it’s Hell. Practically vacation.

chapter 32 - prom

It was the nite of the prom Anya Serkades and Chardley were all dead, angela was on the moon and rossey was in hell so for now all my problems wer solved.

Asahi: Well, Esme is still around.

Jacub showed up to the dor in a fucking sexy Indian outfit with only his you know what covered because that's what the indiens wore before we cockenered them.

Cherry: This sounds kind of racist.

Alice was also wearing something

Briar: I would hope she’s wearing something.

Edward had a suit on becauses hes an old school boy and jasmine was earing and Tanishashanqua was there too wearing stuff but not sa mine nice because she's a poor fucker.

Asahi: Can you not be a rude friend for one chapter?

We also had our instruments so that we could make a band at the dance because were going to play when we get there for the entire school.

"Wait Rebecca was what about esme?" Jacob opened his mouth and said.

Cherry: As opposed to when he talks with his mouth shut.

"do not worry I have a plan" I told him winking but no blinking because blinking is for emus.

Briar: …Everyone…blinks.

Asahi: She’s just dumb.

Anyways I rode Jacob all the way there and then got off when we got there. I also brought all of the instruments for our band its called "Opposite feelings give double abstinency" and its about how Judah rocks and how we will speed his world to the word.

Cherry: Ah, so basically Christian Rock.

When we got ther the dance was full all of the surviving students wer there.

Asahi: After everything they’ve been through, they deserve a dance to forget.

Jacub was my date so I was going to paes religion class like Aro wanted

Cherry: I forgot about that rule.

and esme was there too she was standing on top of the tower loking down evily at everyone and thigns.

The everything was dancing like a whore with pneumonoultramicroscopicsili covolcanokoniosis and jetengining and shit.

Briar: …Your diseases are fucking weird.

Cherry: I can promise ya that aint a real disease.

I saw bella she was an emo shit so I smacked her on the way in. Everybody laufhged at that fucking whore so we went back to dancing.

Asahi: I see we’re back to being horrible to Bella.

Asahi: The good could not last.

It was a slow song called my heart will travel on and Jacub and I dancd and made out during the dance it was so cuuute.

Briar I’ll take your word for it.

The we stated playing our band for the prom so those shitty emo fucks could mosh the fuckers.

Bullet given by bets boys

Given by all bet boys can do

Luzel try to prize up you

Willow tasted everything

Asahi: Well that song sounds like shit. Maybe it’s because it’s in English? Maybe it’s just a shit song.

Cherry: It’s a bad song.

I could see satan in my mind trying to stop me from playing but I kept going on because THAT WEAK FUCKER CAN SUCK MY TAINT!

Briar: Well, Satan just sucks.

Bawu go away to ERROR TRANSLATION CODE fc at 405e

[][]

[] JMLITE'SWID YIE CR

DRUGS TAKETO FLITE

Asahi: …What?

Cherry: Ah, I love singing “fc at 405e,” “[] [] [] [],” and “Jmlite’swid yie cr”

The cowd rared as I busted out my epic gitar solo which also shok the foundations of the school and the earth

Cherry: Can ya not summon Hell this time?

. It didn't purse the heavens but it did cause the fucking obnockshis decorations to fall onto the prom comity which I thought was funny. But then something happened as I played the gitar began to grow and growand got fucking big and green and throbbing.

Asahi: That is uncomfortable imagery.

It throbbed so hard that heaven blew up I could see it from here. Then Hell too because half the planet was already gone it was weak from prevous strikes.

"REBEBCCA THANK YOU" people screemed astheir souls were saved by me, THE GERATEST PERSON IN AL LTHE WORLD

Briar: I’m sorry, but you’re not.

Asahi: Not even close to being a good person.

"YOU ARE WELCOME" I said to world walking the rabid truble that lay in my way.

Then the president of the school Esme came to satge to announce the winners of the election.

"hello dear children. Rossey is in hell so there will be no competition but before lthat lies we will talk about the prom king and queen!" she said and everybody cheered except me and my friends becuz we no fucking whore that esme.

"JACUB WINS PROM KING"

Asahi: I don’t know how American schools work. Can someone who’s not a student win prom king?

Cherry: As far as I know, no?

she screemd and jacub jumped into the stage and accepted his reward. He was shirtless and shit and he was so so fucking hot I mean fuck I wanted to have sex right there I even got a bit wet.

Briar: For someone who’s so angry when people say they want to have sex with you, you sure are a hypocrite.

"HOLY SHIT BELLA WON PROM QUEEN" she screemd with her middle finger up at me.

Cherry: You earned it!

Briar: Good job, Bella! I voted for you.

Asahi: Same, she had my vote.

But then wen bella got up on stag to accept her prom award we duped a bucket of blood onto her to humiliate her in the eys of the world. The world got up and cheerd because every fucking person hates that shitty bitch.

Cherry: Didn’t you ever watch Carrie?

Cherry: That’s a bad thing ta do!

Asahi: Well, time for everyone to die.

She cried and cryed and then Mark dragged her off the stage like a cow. But for some reason I felt a ping of badness in my hart. Why did this feel wrong? She deserted it!

Briar: No one deserves that!

Briar: What is wrong with you?

"NO ITS ACTUALLY REEBCEA" esme screemd

Asahi: Why you do us dirty like that?

and I got up to take my crown as my prize. I had on a beatufil fucking gorgeous dress and everybody thought I was the hottest girl in the rom everyone wanted to fuock me but I was saving myself for Jacob later tonight.

Briar: What happened to waiting until marriage?

Asahi: Knew that wasn’t going to last.

"yo motherfucker good job." I turned my head to see who the fuck called ME a motherfucker and It was Obomba he was here to give me my reward!

Cherry: Look, I’m sure Obomba’s got plenty more important stuff ta do than be here.

Obomba is the president of the country! He was wering a swhil traditional dress and shit.

Asahi: I’m sure he’s rocking his dress.

Asahi: But this honestly is starting to sound like that R/ThatHappened.

Cherry: We just need peeps to start clappin.

"you are an example for us all" Obomba sad and he put the crown on me because I was the president and empress of the danse! Everybody clapped their hands for me and even gave me a bouget of flowers they were fucking orange daisys.

Cherry: There’s the clappin.

"HELL FOOL YOU WILL PAY FOR THAT!" I looked oer and it was Chocolove he was stating down Obomba!

Asahi: “How dare you give her flowers when it’s our anniversary! You know orange daisies are my favorite!”

"FUCK YOU BITCH YOU ANSWER TO ME" Obamba screemed and took out a breedsword and treated Chocoloev with me.

"NO OBOMBA DON'T DO IT HE IS UMMINE TO SORDS WITHOUT BLADE UNLIKE YOURS" I screemd but it was no use because Chocolove used his energy barier to atomic ombo's ass.

Briar: Sword immunity? I could use something like that.

As he died he outstretched his arms to Judah and said "god save me, my body!" but then he passed to the other side but then didn't because I had pursed heaven and freed all souls so he just lay their soules.

Cherry: Right, cause making sure there’s no spiritual afterlife’s so great.

Asahi: Kind of sucks.

But then chocolate love appeared and summond his Mick his jaarga and then became a lance to use against me! Chocolove took the lance and threw it at me

Asahi: Is anyone else following this fight? Because I’m still not sure what’s going on and why it’s going on.

Cherry: Don’t look at me. I’m just pretendin’ it makes sense.

"MY SPEAR ROD WILL PIERSE YOU" he screemed

Asahi: Kinky.

and then I dodged so it hit that fucking atrocious hag jane instead. She started grolowing and shit and then exploded into a booldy mess all over my fucking gorgeous dress. I WAS FUCKING ANGRY.

Briar: I get the feeling she hates all the canon female characters except Alice and possible Rosalie.

Asahi: That’s probably an accurate assumption.

But before I could do anything the moon started to crash into the planet! I looked up and it was ANGELA! SHE WAS PILOTING THE MOON INTO THE SCHOOL!

Cherry: While that sounds freakin’ awesome, it’s completely implausible an I’ll use some science an facts to show why.

Cherry: It’s generally accepted that an asteroids gotta be at least nine miles ta do some extensive damage to Earth on impact. Hell, the Cicxulub impactor is estimated t’be be at least seven miles in diameter—though to be more precise, it’s from seven to fifty miles in diameter. No one really knows for sure cause no one was there to measure it when it picked a fight with the earth.

Cherry: That’s the asteroid that wiped out the dinos.

Cherry: The moon? The moons over a thousand miles in diameter. You can imagine what’d happen.

Cherry: Though speed of impact is a factor. Even if yer goin’ at a snails pace, you’re gonna do some massive damage.

Cherry:…What the Hell, can I keep this random facts thing after I leave the theater? I’d ace every test!

"YOU FUCKER YOU THINK YOU KILL CAN ME THAT EASILY" she SCREAMED. She made a cross with her moon and then attacked chocolove with it and he tried to deflect with his hands! He was fast but she drove the moon like a fucking professional.

Asahi: Not to mention it’s… well… the moon.

"NO HOMIE DON'T KILL MY DAD HE'S ALL I HAVE LEFT" Tanishashanqua screemed as she got between Chocolove and the moon.

Briar: Wait, if Chocolove is Tanishashanqua and Angela’s dad, they’re sisters, right?

Asahi: Yep. Gonna be a fun family reunion between those three, Bella and Renée.

The entire dance stopped to look at the scene it was so beautiful and we could touch it.

Cherry: You’d think they’d be freakin’ out because someone’s bringing the moon to the Earth.

Angela stopped and stared crying because all she evr wanted was to be runited with her long last dad after he mom dyed of AIDS when agela was only 5

Cherry: Aww… I feel bad for her. Losing your mom sucks, specially that young.

I also lafed when that happen the fucking whore.

Cherry: What the fuck?

Asahi: Yeah, whatever good points she’s acquired for saving Bella, she’s losing all of them this chapter.

Then something ajazing happened! Tanishahsnaqua's word touched angela and she stoped her rampage. She hot off the moon to go and hug cocolove and then the three embraced each other. They were a famil yagain it was a beautiful site to see!

Briar: And then they directed their murderous rage at Rebecca.

Then Jane came back from the beyond because I blew up heaven and hell with my music so she then told as "WE HAVE TO GO" quickly because the moon was coming.

Cherry: Thank ya! Thank ya for noticing the freaking moon is goin’ to collide with the Earth!

"but why" I screemed

Asahi: Because the moon!

"Because Cocolove is going to try to kill you bitch" she screemed and then made magic with her fingers and screemed "METEOR". Then the moon got up and started attacking again and Chocolove took out his lance to stop it.

Briar: …I’m just imagining that the moon sprouted some arms to fight with.

Asahi: Heh. That’s a funny mental image. Only way ‘the moon started attacking again’ makes sense.

"WILD MOTHERFUCKER YOU AINT GOT NOTHING ON ME" Chocoloe scremed as he fought off the moon from the dance. Angela helped too "I will protect my daddy!" she screemed. But then piloted Clarity [AN: ARROW]

Cherry: As if we forgot Green Arrow’s in her.

and Mark and Cayus all appeared! They were the Volture!

Asahi: Oh, no! They are?

Asahi: Who would have known!

"IT IS THE TIME TO BATTLE YOU AND KILL YOU REBECCA!" Esme screemd "VOLTURE! ROLL THE FUCK OUT AND FUCK HER UP!" and with that we engaged them in a epic battle.

Briar: We will have to take your word for it.

Edward took out his nales and fought Cayus wile Alice took out her gun and stated to fight the robot Clarity while Jacub fought Mark with his axe.

"Tanishahsnqa help me figh esme!" I screemed as I pushed a student out fo the way of an e nergy beam. I took out a grenade and threw it as esme flew around the room shooting of kamehamehas and shit but it didn't' stop her!

Cherry: What? We’re in Dragon Ball now?

Cherry: If I don’t see Vegeta showing up an’ curbstompin’ all of em, Imma revolt.

"FUCK I CANT HIT HER!" I screemed!

"she is not immoral" Tanishahsnqua sad wile shooting her getto gun. It was a sene to see! Tanishashqnau's mech arm turned into a gatling gun and started machine gunning that fucking bitch

Asahi: Yang?!

"TAKE THISSSSSSS" she screemed! But then the fucking sluts sulpichia and nympho appeared and thired to use magic on Tanishashanqua.

Cherry: The who the what now?

"FIRAGA" bympho screemed

"BLIZARGA" Sulpy screened

Asahi: Oh. Now we’re in Kingdom Hearts. Yay…

"NOOOO NOT MY SISTER" and with that Angela took the hit for Tanishahsnqua. Jane took the other one that hag and disintegrated so tht her soul could never return to her fucking ugly ass boody.

Briar: Can you stop being rude? Please? Just for once?

Cherry: Honestly I liked Jane? She was actually pretty cool in the books?

But angela was okay wich was polished good because Tanishahsnqua cant afford the operation to save angela if she died.

Asahi: Polished good?

Asahi: What is with American slang?

Asahi: What does it mean? What does it mean!?

"Angela you are my sis put aside your differences and work with me to fight evil" Tanishashanqua said and esme was killing motherfuckering normal students with her kamehamehame's.

Cherry: And you suddenly care?

"I WILL TRY" angela said redeemed for all of her actions as she began to.

Asahi: That’s the laziest redemption arc I’ve ever seen

Cherry: It makes me cringe.

But then esme flew onto me and pushed me really fuckign far away but it didn't last because "TELEPORT" I heard.

Suddenly me Edowerd and Bella were all in a dark house.

Asahi: For the love of—!

Asahi: Let Bella be out of this story so she can be safe and at peace!

"were we go to?" Bella say. Then I thought as I recognized the house! It was… THE COLLINS MANOR!

Briar: Because they live in a manor, the best way to avoid suspicion.

"ITS EDOWERD'S HOUSE!" I screemed. "But who teleported us!?" I asked edowerd. "The Hag is dead!" Edowerd nodded and turned is back to me.

Asahi: Can you maybe be respectful to people for once in your life?

Cherry: She’d die if she did.

"I know who" EDowerd said. Suddenly…. CHOCOLOVE STEPPED OUT INTO THE FOYAY.

" Chocolove what are you-" bella began but then Chocolove took out a gun that was fucking huge and aimed it at us.

Briar: Hey, Edward. Right now would be a good time to use that vampiric speed to save them.

"The plan commences" he said and then blew bella's entire fucking head straight off and all of the blood got on me again.

Asahi: That’s it!

Asahi: I’m rioting!

Asahi: Screw this! You killed the only person I actually care about in this story. How dare you?

Everythign stopped.

AN: this chapter was edited by Kurshee aka Yammama who is the only one who fucking hels with this shit.

Briar: How is it that people keep agreeing to edit?

But I leaned from before that you can trust these fuockers so after this he's fird to. FUCK YOU YAMAMA

Cherry: Well, that’s not very professional.

Cherry: Yamama was just tryin’ t’be nice by helping you with this awful fic.

In that moment, things suddenly became clear. There wasn't anymore confusion in my mind. No, that's not true. I was paralyzed in shock still.

Briar: How is it that the death of someone you hate and constantly abuse is what shocks you, but everyone else dying doesn’t even bother you?

The blood from what used to be Bella's head was splattered all over me.

Asahi: Screw you!

This wasn't like when Alice used those non lethal bullets.

Cherry: Hah. Yeah. Non-lethal.

Bella's entire head was gone. Spread out over the foyer floor, never to be reassembled.

Briar: Until she remembers there is no heaven and so her soul returns like Janes did when she was killed the first time.

Cherry: Consistence? TwilightRova don’t know her.

Before I could even turn to look at her killer, another gunshot went off. It took a moment to register. A warm red liquid was seeping out of my abdomen. He got me, too. I tried to cover the wound with my shaky hands.

Asahi: Hey, guys?

Asahi: Is it just me, or is this chapter actually… good?

Cherry: Yeah… there’s not been any spelling mistakes, at least outside the authors note. The story is plausible so far…

Cherry: Why the Hell would ya fire Yamama if this is the kind of quality we get with them editin’?!

"W-why?.." I manage to mutter. Blood is seeping out of my mouth. I might have been able to take this had Angela not done so much damage to me yesterday. I don't have much time.

Briar: By the Gods, acknowledging the beatdowns that Rebecca has gotten in the previous chapters and it’s ill-effects it will have on her health?

Briar: I’m without words!

"You should've played along when you had the chance, girl." My assailant caustically berated me from his position at the top of the staircase.

Asahi: “Caustically”! I never thought I’d see that word used in this kind of story!

Asahi: And mentioning his position! The angle and distance that’s implied!

Cherry: Shit, this chapter is good!

"Now, vampire. Finish her." I glanced at Edward as he was ordered around. His hooded eyes had turned a crimson red.

Briar: Edwards working with Chocolove?

Briar: Wait, this explains why he attacked her earlier!

Asahi: Damn. That’s actually good.

"Don't do it Edward!"

"Why shouldn't he?"

Cherry: Honestly, I want Edward to kill her.

Asahi: Yeah, regardless of the jump in quality, and boy is it a jump, I still hate Rebecca. She can die.

"Because... Because if for just one moment I don't keep up this facade of fake-perfection, you'll realize how empty I am on the inside. Yeah, empty would be the best word to describe it. You see Bella over there? She's empty too. She's dead. Chocolove killed her."

Briar: And you suddenly care? You constantly abuse her, you tried to kill her on multiple occasions, you stabbed and shot her. Honestly, if it wasn’t Chocolove, it would have been you who killed her.

I stumble to the ground as I finish, blood and flesh searing from my wound. "I bet you he always planned it to, just like he and my mother did for me!" I was laughing maniacally now.

Asahi: Oh? He’s connected to her mother? There’s more to her tragic backstory than what we know?

The walls were beginning to pulsate in and out, blending and bending the fabric of the room together and apart. I'm being pulled apart.

Cherry: I like this line.

Cherry: I actually like this line!

"They hid me from the world for years so that when I was finally released, I would be a tyrant." Chocolove steadies his aim on me as he descends the stairwell; his face says it all. Stop speaking at once or I will end you here and now.

But you know what?

Things are clear for the very first time for me. Something locked away has finally surfaced.

Fuck him.

Briar: Damn.

Asahi: *Whistles*

Cherry: This chapter is makin’ me hate this story less and less.

Cherry: For once Rebecca is a good narrator. Not a good character, but damn this is good narration.

"Don't listen to this girl, Edward," Chocolove says with a certain smoothness to his voice. He extends his hand towards Edward while keeping the gun aimed at my head. In this moment, I don't even know where I am anymore. Things are wobbly, and I can barely see Edward. He's leaning closer and closer to Chocolove, considering which of the two of us to try and go after.

Briar: The detail! The description! The way you can feel and see what’s going on!

Briar: This editor was a Godssend.

I can't let Chocolove convince him to gut me. I can't let it end here. Anywhere but here.

"NO! Don't you get it by now Edward!? I act the way I do because if I don't, then people will realize that I'm nothing!"

Asahi: We knew you were nothing even with you acting that way.

Every piece of my body screams out in a putrid agony, begging for relief. I can't stop though; if I stop for a moment then I lose my only chance at survival. I have to bring Edward back to his senses. "Deep down, I'm hollow inside. I was made to be hollow. I was engineered to be hated from the very beginning, to give all of humanity something to hate together; to unite them under one common cause."

Cherry: I don’t like how meta this is gettin.

Cherry: It scares me.

As Edward backs away from Chocolove, my tears litter the messy floor of the foyer. I'm failing. I have to keep convincing him that I'm not worth preying on. "My death." I couldn't stop myself from breaking out into laughter, interrupted only by sobs and blood I would cough up. I was cracking. I couldn't even tell if it's from the pain or from the despair.

Asahi: Both.

Asahi: Now you know what we felt these past thirty-some chapters.

Everything I had done in my life, it all hit me. Poor, poor Bella. Charlie. Jane. I've mistreated everybody around me. I deserve this fate. I deserve to die, alone and afraid.

Cherry: Yes, you do.

All I can do was collapse and cry.

"Edward, what I have done here is for the greater good. A monster such as Rebecca has no place in society. She is to be feared, not loved; despised, not pitied." The man preached with a twisted sense of conviction.

Briar: I want to agree with you, I really do.

Briar: But you’re not entirely likable either, Chocolove.

Asahi: You’re just making us feel pity for her, now.

Like a rubber band that had been stretched too far, something inside of me broke. The recoil echoed through my body, sending my slumped figure into a spasm. A burning sensation began to grow in my chest, and in a moment of clarity I grasped at my abdomen. The searing pain got worse and worse, and I was back on my side, screeching in agony. The realization that I was not simply shot had dawned on me. There was a hole through my body, as big as my first, running all the way through. I'm already dead.

Asahi: Damn, the quality.

Asahi: I can’t get over how good it is.

In an instant, the walls of reality came crumbling down upon me. Each breath in this world took years to finish, while every thought was over in an instant. Just as suddenly as I entered this trance, I left it with a conviction. There was not a thing holding me back anymore. I rose to my feet, gripping my Katana with both hands. Before he even had a chance to react, I charged Chocolove and ran him through with my sword. I kicked Edward with all my might, sending him flying back through a wall. This was the strength I was given by my creator.

Cherry: Ah! The fourth wall! She kicked Edward through it!

The strength to choose my own destiny.

"Up until this point, I have had the displeasure of trying to comprehend life here. Now I see that I was never meant to understand life as it is in the first place; this is because I was constructed to be a hollow being." I run him through again, pinning the scientist to a wall of the manor using his own daughter's sword.

Briar: Oh, yeah. The katana was given to her by Angela. I actually forgot because it never got mentioned again.

Briar: A good throwback.

"What you perhaps do not understand, Chocolove, is how genius your plans were. In fact, part of me wishes to commend you for them. Hiding me from the world for years so that when I was finally released, I would be a tyrant? Priceless. Literally engineering a child which would grow into a being that would be despised and ridiculed for its apparent mental illness? Utter brilliance. Revealing this all to me, however? I would say that I'm disappointed, but that would require me to be able to feel. Something which, according to you, I've never been capable of doing."

Asahi: She’s right. She really does lack any feelings that aren’t self-centered vanity.

He struggles to reply as I talk to him, locked to the wall by my blade.

"Throughout all your planning and deviancy, you failed to remember one important detail about what you were doing. You were making me unique, Chocolove. A Rarity. Something truly special. In your quest to create something that people would strive to exterminate, you developed a being unlike any other. A being made entirely out of weaknesses and flaws."

"You see Chocolove, even with the discord that would run through my head, I learned something important. No matter what, people can get by and change despite their flaws. It's one of the most humanistic traits I can think of. And yet, I had been just beginning to display those kinds of traits myself- Shedding that coat of superiority and stupor to connect with people who I never dreamed were so interesting! Does that make me human, Mr. Judah Chocolove?" His eyes flare as he hears that name.

Cherry: Holy shit!

Cherry: Chocolove is Judah!?

Asahi: Things make sense. Things are making sense at it is so disorientating.

The name of the man who raised me. The name of the man who I had been conditioned to forget since day one. The name of the man who brought me into this world.

"No, it doesn't. Because according to you, a monster can never change. A monster has no potential to love, to learn, or even to live. Its only defining characteristic is that it is the antithesis to humanity." I twist the Katana ever so slightly. He bears the pain, only wincing.

"Somehow though, you created a person capable of experiencing every feeling across the spectrum, something that directly contradicts with your definition of what a monster is! You tortured them and broke them and finally molded them into a being so heinous, so vile, that people would band together just to erase it and every trace of it from this world."

"If you had only given me a chance, Judah! All I ever wanted to just to be loved- Nowhere was it written that I had to walk into that school every day of my life honestly believing that my actions had no consequences, that I had the power to murder people because I was some perfect sparkling princess. I didn't have to be that psychotic, foolish, selfish, ridiculously weak bitch- A twisted girl who only was warranted interest when she did something murderous!"

"Forget, for just a moment, about how you destroyed the life I never had, and try to consider the lives of all the people I've killed because you made me into this. Take a couple of moments. Good. What could you possibly say to make that better? I killed Charlie- the only adult who ever tried to help me. You've killed Bella."

"It is nothing but one road bump in an otherwise flawless-" Chocolove began. I twist the Katana further. He lets out a small shriek.

"What am I going to do about this, you ask? I'll tell you what. I'm going to throw a wrench in your plan right now and end it." This is it. I want to see the fear in his eyes.

"You fool."

What?

"Do not take me for a weakling due to my profession, dearest Rebecca."

Where's the fear? I have him pinned. There's no escape!

Briar: This is getting so good.

Briar: I don’t even know what to say.

"There's no way to unite people without the common enemy, is there?"

"What are you-?" My sentence is cut off. He frees himself in an instant. He's fast, faster than anything I have ever seen. In less than a moment, we have traded places. I'm pinned up against the wall by a lance through my mid section.

"I'm starting anew, Rebecca. You are not my only experiment. It's time to clean up loose ends." He smirks, taking the lance out.

Asahi: Oooh! This is good!

Briar: The dialogue, the suspense! The emotion!

Cherry: Are we even still readin’ the Kronicals of Rebecca Swansin? This is too good.

This is my only chance.

I gathered up every ounce of might I had left in my frail body and tried to move out of the way. I wasn't fast enough. He drove the lance through my skull.

Darkness took over.

Briar: Can we just end it here?

Briar: Please?

Briar: This was so good.

AN: okay so frum now on this is the break in Kornicals. I will be trying a new story it will be better then this one you guys.

Asahi: Not hard to surpass all the other chapters. But this one? This one is going to be hard to beat.

It will start angela on her journey and then maybe when ie writen a bit of that i wil come back to Kornicals and continue witing it (i have idea of how to countie it but withu editor it will be betrayd SO REED IT wHEN IT COMES OUT BUT THIS ISNT ADVETISING JUST KINDA SO THINKS FOR REEDING! 333

Briar: Okay, a lot of that didn’t make sense. Only that this isn’t advertisement and that the rest of the chapters won’t be edited.

Cherry: I’m scared.

Chapter 34 – ALIVE AGIN

"what fuck" I sed as I got up shakily.

Asahi: Ah, damn.

Asahi: Back to this crap.

Briar: I miss the beautifully written chapter.

"wate what how the fuck!? I kill you but you survive that? mtoherfucker" chcolove sed to me.

Cherry: I want the other Chocolove back, the one who was written like a suave villain and not a bitch.

"I don't know gtfo you just killed me" You! I say and then do! Cocolove got his lance out and looked mega fuocking confused.

Briar: We’re all confused.

And then vamporized and dispeared into the darkness. I was in a graveyard and so was bella to. We were both fucing fuocking confused because last I remember I was killed by lance and bella was bullet by shot.

Cherry: By all accounts, it doesn’t make sense.

"just kidding, lol" bella say getting up now alive and better.

Asahi: Thank God.

She lauhs and smiles and says "I just pretended to die I can do that you know"

Briar: Useful skill. Getting your head shot off and surviving, very useful.

and then we hi 5 becaused this was a plan we had emergiencially planend out every since the beginning of the last chapter. Bella would fake dye and I would faek dye to make motherfucoker Chocolove reveel just how evil he was that raggot.

Asahi: Yeah, that’s a lie.

Cherry: Smells like a liar.

"Rebecca wtf your body it has changed!" bella say looking to me. I standed back and looked at myself and then I realized I was not me!

Briar: Ah, those out of body experiences where you realize you’re not you.

"it was my soul even though my body dyed my soul didn't go to heaven or hell so it found a new body!" I say. And then I realized!

MY BODY WAS BELLA'S AND BELLA AND ME WERE SHARING A BOODY!

Asahi: Big yikes.

Cherry: Bella kick her out of your body!

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" I scream becuz Bella and Bella I was had to share the femae genitalia that is my body!

Briar: Technically it is Bella’s body.

Briar: You have to share her genitals.

"we have to fix this fucking fast you shitbitch" Bella say now no longer friend since mutual enemy in Chocolive was defeated.

Asahi: Was he really defeated? Was he?

"damn fast" I say. So then we went home to Cullen manner and I went to the bathroom and I started my moisturizing treatment because bella's face is filled with goddamn motherfucking acne and shit because she never fucking takes care of it.

Briar: Bella is pretty stop making things up.

Or was it my face now. Or was it Bella's? Who was even thinking this I no one don't even know at this uppity point somebody fucking put me back in my own body!

Cherry: Or just exorcise your soul and let you die.

"Rebecca's soul now lungers inside of Bella's" Jacob explained to Alicia, Tanishashanqua, Edowerd, Alec, and everybuddy else who didn't try to fucking MURDUR me earlier

Briar: When did they get here?

[I explained, you do not want to kill me rite now trust me] after I explicated it towards him. But Jacob didn't expantiate it right and it was like he was trying to place some of the blame on me!

Asahi: “Rebecca’s soul now lingers inside of Bellas” How is that placing the blame on you? It’s stating the facts.

Asahi: Your soul is in Bella’s body.

Like it was my fault that my soul piloted into Bella's body afterwards and her fatass soul didn't get the fuck out of my way. Maybe if her soul stopped eating so many fucking pillbugs on the playground then she wouldn't be so fucking ugly that motherfucker.

Cherry: Can you not be rude to her? You have to share a body.

Edowerd said: "hello friend I will stick with you from now as a simple form of Rebella!"

"Yes Rebella is an excellent name for the organism" Carlisle the father Collin came in and said.

Cherry: I mean, if it fits.

Briar: Becca would have been better, personally. Bella, Rebecca. Becca.

"I love her she's even cuter than the real Bella!" Jacob squirted. Right then Bella's soul popped right out of her body and went into the doll on her desk.

Briar: Of course it did.

Asahi: I hate this so much.

Now I had Bella's body because mine dyed and now Bella was in an old doll because let's face it she has all the charisma and grace of a goddamn fucking dead ass doll.

Asahi: Uuuurgh.

Asahi: all the character development of the last chapter. Gone.

But this meant I had bellas fucing stupid ass brain that failed psychics class two years in a row so im fuocked inn school now.

Cherry: Good.

"You are so cute, Rebecca" Jacob said to me, because I'm not fucing bella anymore. I had taken bella's body in the ethereal struggle for life and that meant I was rightfully at the top of the fucking food chain.

Asahi: Actually, it means you’re a body thief and deserve to be killed for stealing another’s body.

Briar: I’ve handled cases like these before. The remedy is surprisingly simple, the right herbs crushed and mixed together in an elixir, let the fumes fill the room with the subject in it for a few hours and the invading soul with be dragged out.

Briar: Otherwise, the more painful method involves words, magic, and a lot of stabbing.

Briar: since Bella’s soul in a doll and won’t be harmed, I would personally go with the stabbing option.

"But my sword! It was broke in the fight!" I say. Then Angela step forward and tell me something.

"However to beat it, here is something! When I summoned the moon I made a new Katana. Take my Black Katane and use it's super power to fight the force" she say and then gtfo because Nobody wanted to fucking deal with the that shit of her and Tasnishashqna's dad being evil and crap.

Cherry: Rude.

"So Cocolove is evil we must kill that fucker" I said.

Asahi: We kind of knew he was messed up, but I honestly didn’t expect him to be the final boss.

But then angela came "Chocolove you do not need to kill that bastard, we would are evil through blood?"

Briar: Well, you at least are evil.

Briar: You did murder a bunch of people.

"No we must try to save daddy he is just confused!" Tanishashanqua say. She is so kind but I don't take that shit from no one so I smacked her getto ass face and she was all like "did u just fucing do that whore" and I was all like "fuck yeah you wanna go!?" and she pussied out. The ho.

Asahi: Uuuuurgh.

Asahi: This hurts me as a reader, this really, really hurts me.

"we are not worried you shouldn't worried about that" Edowerd say and we did not know why yet. He could tell us. He would tell us.

Briar: Have to emphasize that bit, he could and he would.

"we must now fight esme, the wolves, and now chocolate love. These are three many [AN" see!? Instead of 2many I have 3many!] enemies to fight of!"

Asahi: That’s just… stupid.

Cherry: Why are you fighting the wolves now? I can understand Chocolove, and Esme, but the werewolves? I thought you were cool with them.

"Do not worry about him what we must worry about is the wolves. They are cuming to start the final battle vs the Collins" Jacub say. "But you can change life's tide like the waters of a waterfall can change the course of a farm" he also say.

Briar: The wolves fighting the Cullens is the only thing that makes any sense.

Briar: Even his inspirational line made no sense.

"So if I direct the course of the farms I will be able to turn tide?" I say!? This was a chance!

Asahi: Yes. If you go and change the way the farms are facing, you can change the battle.

"yes I believe so" bells say.

"bella I am sorry this happned we will find a way to get u back in ur uglyass body" I say and then she cryed a teardrop of joy becuz someone was nice to her in her fucking life.

Cherry: I’d be freakin’ delighted if someone finally treated me like a human being.

Cherry: Especially when I’m in this predicament because of the people around me.

"we will deal with this nonsense hell tomorrow" edoweord say and we break the group of me, bella, Alicia, tanishahsnqua, alec, jacub, edowerd, and angela [but not really she will probably turn evil later don't spoil it though].

Asahi: You just spoiled it, though.

Asahi: I mean it’s a crappy spoiler and no one would have been surprised.

Asahi: But you’ve only yourself to blame for this spoiler.

It was time to eat and shit and go to bed though. So I did. Bella went to slep in alicia's dollhose.

Cherry: Ah, yes. Bathroom time for everyone, even the vampires who don’t use the bathroom.

"Tomorrow I will fucking handle this bullshit" I say and go to bed.

Briar: Tomorrow you will likely make it all worse.

Chapter 35 – Working at McDonalds

Cherry: Now that’s a weird change in story.

Cherry: Went from Vampiric-Werewolf war to Fast Food.

Asahi: Yet it’s not farfetched for this story.

Today I woke up from my bed furiously.

Briar: Waking up angry, happens all the time.

I used spellcheck on my paper so that when people like my teechors tried to make fun of it they would b wrong. And they are. And so it shall be!

Asahi: Good, now can you use spellcheck on your story?

Asahi: Please?

"good morning Rebecca" doll bella not human bella said to me nicely. She is so nice ever sins she lost her boody bdecause she knows that I am trying hard to get it back!

Cherry: If you’re tryin’ hard, you’d evict yer soul from her body an let her take it over again.

Thenshe made me EGGS

Asahi: A doll… made you eggs?

Asahi: What is this? Disney?

"work harder you bitch" I say to her and she do. She is like the wicked stepmother.

Briar: You really don’t understand what ‘nice’ means, do you?

Briar: Or wicked?

Cherry: She’s makin’ ya eggs when just openin’ the fridge must be hard as fuck, an your being a bitch to her!

Com to think of it yes that is exactly what she is aftr what she did to me.

Asahi: Bella. Did. Nothing. Wrong.

Asahi: If anything, you’re the wicked stepsister.

Asahi: Actually, scratch that. You’re literal Satan.

But that is another story. It was soething too terribul to write down or say out loud.

Cherry: Probably cause ya can’t think of a justifiable reason for why you’re this terrible to her.

I didn't want to think abut how she sent chardly to kill me. Charly was my friend until became my fiend due to bells's influx.

Briar: No? She didn’t?

Asahi: Charlie didn’t want to kill you. You wanted to take his keys and decided murder was the best way to get them! Bella had nothing to do with it!

Then I realized I was so silly!

Cherry: Everythin’ bout this is silly.

We didn't have school today I laughed and sighed. It was Saturday which is a weekend day! Tomorrow would be Sunday! Then would come Monday the day we went back to school to graduate and enter the worl das adults. I am ready to be an adult.

Briar: Oh, it’s that close to graduation already?

Cherry: I get the feelin’ she doesn’t know how the adult world works.

Because it was not the weekstart I went to dairy queen to get siome ice creem because fuck u mainstream shits if you think ice cream is only eating at night.

Asahi: Ice cream is a food you can eat at any time of the day.

But no! I culdnt eat as much I wanted because bel;la's body was fucking fatass. Oh wait it was fat ass. Boys like fat ass so my ass aint gonna not stay fat you fuckers!

Briar: So… your ass is going to stay fat?

Asahi: I guess some guys like asses? I’m not really one of them, I guess.

Cherry: Oh? You’re tits man, then?

Asahi: Ah, no. I guess I just… don’t really care how they look too much?

"Yo homie what's up?" sed Tanishahsqnua who works hard at derry queen when she is not at school or fighting evil with me. "what can I get for you?"

"I want a fucking mcflurry"

Cherry: McFlurry?

Cherry: You’re at Dairy Queen ya pleb! Go to McDonalds if ya want that trash.

"okay just one moment that will be $600" she say.

"NO THAT'S TOO MUCH CASH" I say.

Asahi: Yikes. That much? Well, I guess considering they have to go to McDonalds and buy a McFlurry so they can sell it to her, makes sense.

"too bad bitch were in a recession" she sed to me but no! I took the mcflurry out of that whore Tanishashanqua's hands and left the store. What a bitch trying to steal my hjard earned cash. This was the money from chadley's life insurance how DARE she try to steal it from me! What did she who think she be!?

Briar: So that justifies you stealing from a store?

Briar: Your logic is nonsense.

Cherry: I want to go back to the good chapter this is too painful.

Then I saw Alicia drug deeling behind DQ so I went over to her to talk to her and show her light of god [AN: Rebecca stil worshops Judah from the bible not Judah chocolove you sick fuockers].

Asahi: As far as I care, they’re one in the same.

"hey becca what's good" she say. She looked fuckign gorgeous in her red lipstick red cocktail dress. She say that it helps her to get all of the boys like Serkades before I fucing killed him for being dead earlier last arc.

Briar: You killed him for being dead? Didn’t know dying was such a heinous crime that deserved execution.

"not much" I sed sexily slurping my mcflurry. Unf I was so hot.

"Rebecca you don't do much. You should find a job. Try McDonalds down the street I think they are hiring!" she said fluently!

Asahi: Thanks, Alicia, for pointing that out. Rebecca does absolutely nothing of value.

I went to McDonalds to go an get a job. "I NEED WORK" I said to the bartenders and they were all like "okay you are overkwalified but okay"

Briar: McDonalds isn’t a bar. It’s fast food.

and so now I was behind counters! I waited for my fiorst customer when I saw him I culdnt believe who it was!

"bella why are you working at Mickey D's?" asked Rosally! She had escapd from Hell! BUT HOW!?

Cherry: Cause it’s Rosalie. As if Hell could keep her down.

"how be!?" I screemed at the top of my lungs! "I saw the molten sin drag you to hell, you cannot be!" I flummoxed!

Cherry: Cause it’s Rosalie.

"if you think that will stop me you have a lot of think to still do" she sad. "give me a goddamn double cheeseburger" say.

"that is money" I say.

Asahi: No. That’s a double cheeseburger.

"how about I fucing kill everyone here!?" she escalated!

Briar: That is quite the escalation.

"oh fuck that bullshit" I say and took my katan out and cut her gun in half but then she and I got into a martial arts routine and shit was flying everywhere the cops came to try and stop us but we wer moving at the speed of sound not quite light!

Asahi: That’s one way to lose your job in one day.

"THIS MOON POWERED KATAN BRINGS DEATH!" I screem and chop Rosalie's gun into half!

Briar: Okay, very excessive and rididculous.

Cherry: Sounds like anime BS.

"you fool I am not even using one tent of my power" she say and then her eyes turned red! Sort of like she was vamping out except not! We fught some more, and I dodged her bullits so they blew up the cash registurd!

"goddamit you have to pay for that" I say!

Briar: Or you can, considering you started this.

"fuck you I'm bringing the cash to Esme!" she say and then enacted her assasinial duties and shot my manager. The bitch. I get my $$$ from him!

Cherry: Yer gonna end up fired, anyways.

"Idiot, I did not even use my strength" she say. Her strengthened bullits were no match for me though! But then they wer!

Asahi: And no one is surprised.

Cherry: She’s just so overconfident, and then she realizes that she’s screwed.

Oh no what do now!? Then rose left with the cash and McDonalds was fucing ruined.

"Rebecca you are fired for not stoping her it is your civic duty to protect people" my manager say in deathly breath.

"wait how the fuock do u know I am rebecac and not bella" I ask.

Briar: Because you have to introduce yourself when you get a job and you probably introduced yourself as Rebecca.

Asahi: Of course she’s going to try blaming Bella for this.

"oshit" he say and dyied in my arms, a lover I never got to have.

Briar: You don’t even know his name you’re a rather bad lover.

"Okay seriously fuck this shit" I angrily shoke and I left Mickey D's and went to find a new job becuz this one sucked donkey balls. Maybe I could teach at the indiend restraint where Jacub worked because at this rate forks is a crime zone that nobody shuld have to live in.

Asahi: You’re still a student, you need a teaching degree and I think a license to teach in America. You wouldn’t be accepted.

Cherry: Do you even know anythin’ to teach at a Indian school?

Then it hit me like a semi! It was a semi actually but I am fine don't worry. As I flipped the biord to that fucing semi driver I had a thought and this thought was a good one!

Briar: Unfortunately you survived being hit by a semitruck.

I SHOULD BECOME A COP LIKE CHARDLEY BEFORE ME! I would take his mantle like the prodigigy I am and protect and serve all kinds!

Cherry: I mean, it’s not a bad—

Asahi: Wait for it.

Except Mexicans I don't fucing like them.

Asahi: There it is.

I ran off to the polise station with Jacub! THIS WAS MY CHANCE!

Briar: Your chance to make a bigger fool of yourself? Yes, yes it is.

AN: I m now repoening this sextion to commints.\

Asahi: Oh, goodie. My favorite part.

"OMFG I can't believe Your writing skills! I like a good story Whether it's making fun of Bella or not I mean come on you are probably in 3rd or 4th grade I mean people like you shouldn't even be on this damn site.

Cherry: They’re not wrong. Ya need to be thirteen at least to make an account.

I know 4th graders that sound like Albert Einstein Compared to you. Get some brains and grow up. -TheTruthDetecter"

Asahi: Speaking the truth, oh TheTruthDetector,

Im soree, how did the operashin to remove that flagpole from your ass go you shitbrick?

Briar: And another stunning example of maturity from TwilightRova. How can someone so mature withstand the people around her?

AN: hahaha u fuckers srsly thugt that the old chaptr 35 was REEL u dumb shits!

Asahi: Ah, yes, calling your readers dumb shits. Such a good move as an author, it’s a wonder why none of the bestselling authors insult their readers more often.

It was may fools like april fools only more secret! Stupid shits.

Cherry: Says the one makin’ up holidays to justify a terrible chapter.

Chapter 35 – Saving Bella

Asahi: Finally we’re going to save Bella!

Asahi: The girl deserves the world and more after all she has been put through.

Today I woke up from my bed furiously. I used spellcheck on my paper so that when people like my teechors tried to make fun of it they would b wrong. And they are.

Cherry: I don’t think teachers criticizing’ your work for its awful spelling are wrong.

Cherry: I’d have gotten F’s in all my classes if I handed in papers like this.

Otherwise I wuldnt have straight a's on all of my report cards you dumb shits!

Asahi: Chances are she’s sleeping with the teachers to get those A’s.

Asahi: Nothing we’ve seen so far would justify any intelligence beyond getting a D at best.

"good morning Rebecca" doll bella [AN: not human bella] said to me nicely. She is so nice ever sins she lost her boody bdecause she knows that I am trying hard to get it back!

Briar: If you were trying, really trying, you’d put your own soul in the doll and let her have her body back.

Briar: So, no. You’re not trying at all.

Thenshe made me EGGS! Eggs are my fucking favorite breakfast fud. But then she burned them so you know what? Fuck that whore.

Asahi: You are in the negatives in terms of “I’m A Good Person” point. I didn’t think it was possible to score so low, but you’ve surpassed my expectations.

"work harder you bitch" I say to her and she do. She is like the wicked stepmother. Com to think of it yes that is exactly what she is aftr what she did to me. But that is another story. It was soething too terribul to write down or say out loud. I didn't want to think abut how she sent chardly to kill me. Charly was my friend until became my fiend due to bells's influx.

Cherry: We’ve already been through this. Is she just rehashing the same things she said last chapter with minimal difference?

Asahi: Talk about lazy.

[AN: see!? It is really bella who is the problem, not Rebecca! Rebecca is so nice to even consider helping that ritzy biotch!]

Briar: As people who have been reading this trainwreck of a story, that is far from the truth. In actuality, Rebecca is just the worst person in this story.

Briar: With the exception of Seth, a rapist.

Then I realized I was so silly! We didn't have school today I laughed and sighed. It was Saturday which is a weekend day! Tomorrow would be Sunday! Then would come Monday the day we went back to school to graduate and enter the worl das adults. I am ready to be an adult.

Asahi: Trust me, you’re not.

Asahi: Can you do taxes? Can you change oil in a car? Do you know how to pay bills? Do you have a job that will let you pay bills?

Asahi: Do you have the mental maturity to be an adult?

Cherry: An the answer to all of that is a big, fat, no.

Because it was not the weekstart I went to dairy queen to get siome ice creem because fuck u mainstream shits if you think ice cream is only eating at night. But no! I culdnt eat as much I wanted because bel;la's body was fucking fatass. Oh wait it was fat ass. Boys like fat ass so my ass aint gonna not stay fat you fuckers!

Briar: Please, oh please change the story. This is the exact same thing from the last chapter.

Anyways I brought the doll bella with me because if she druve a car it wuld be some fucing weird ass chucky shit

Asahi: Finally some difference.

Cherry: Bella wouldn’t even be able to reach the steerin’ wheel or the pedals.

Cherry: Not unless you, like, tape sticks to her limps so she can actually drive.

"Rebecca you look sexy" sed jacub

Briar: Since Rebecca is in Bella’s body, he’s technically saying Bella looks sexy.

Asahi: I approve of this. Bella is beautiful and wonderful.

Briar: I feel like you’re only saying it at this point out of spite towards Rebecca.

Asahi: And because it’s like after watching a puppy get kicked you want to give it affection so it feels better.

as he came over to me. Jacub was looking even hotter than normal he was weering a soot. Soots are so fucing hot on men aren't they.

Cherry: Ah, yes. It really brings out the “Chimney Sweeper” appeal when ya cover yerself in soot.

I just wantd to fuck him on the table in the dairy queen but im in public so wtf I wouldn't ever do that! Fuck u if you don't think girls get hornly too!

Cherry: Girls have sex drives too.

Cherry: But at the same time, why the fuck would you write it an then complain about it?

"thanks stud I think you are smexy" I say and curdled with him lovinglee. We went to the park to go and find a bench to make the fuck out on when I saw something! It was Alicia selling her new drug. It was ten time better than pot so good that it stopped being pot, it became bowl.

Asahi: If it doesn’t come in bowl shapes, I will riot.

Briar: Did she just abandon Bella at Dairy Queen?

Asahi: She had better have left her card, too, so Bella can charge it to the max.

"Yo girl u wanna buy some bowl" Alicia offered. She is a function economy is this regard.

Cherry: Alicia is basically God of the local drug trade at this point.

Cherry: No one’s gonna try musclin’ in on her turf.

"No Alicia. You are wrong to pick this path in life" I say praying to my god Judah. She was so misled mayb I culd convert her back to normal one day.

Briar: Don’t. Alicia is so much more interesting than you are.

Briar: And the economy will collapse if she stops.

"I need to afrod rent" she say because ever sins esme tried to kill every fuckign person at prom I burned the cullins hose down to kill esme but it didn't wrok. Even since the house was burned down we have all been living in an apartment. Tht was what we wer in last chapter you shit.

Cherry: An ya didn’t think ta mention that last chapter?

Cherry: It would have maybe been interestin’ seeing ya come to the conclusion that ya need to burn down their house.

Suddenly an earthquick haped and Rossey climed up out of the crack in the ground! FUCK!

Asahi: Hell still can’t contain the raw power that is Rosalie.

"you goddamn motherfucing cunt Imma fucing kill Rebecca" she say! Her hare was longer and her boobs bunced wildly because she had to eat her bra to not strave to deth in hell!

Briar: As you do when you need to survive.

"wate she does not know that I am not bells!" jacub quiced silently to me! He was right!

"she is in Armenia" I say quckly and then rosalee come to me.

Asahi: Hopefully she will stay there.

"I will protect you from that sitch, do no worry" she villanously say and then started to summon something! "because esme is too fucing week I WILL KILL REBECCA MYSELF!"

Briar: Please do!

Cherry: We’re puttin’ all our hopes on ya, Rosalie.

then a satantic pentagram appeared on her fourhead and she glowed all evil and red and shit and summoned shit! It was 2 guys and French fucker!

"this is talsy, Hawko, and troy" she exposed wildly. Her hare went from blonde to beautiful fire red and her guns culd shoot fire I culd tell! "they will kill people Rebecca knows until she is ded!" then fuck rose because she flew off with satan's powers to Armena!

Asahi: Good.

Cherry: This might be getting’ good finally. Rebecca’s days are numbered.

"sest un farse" the frenchy one sed! He had fucking nasty ass gross green skin he wasn't fucking hot at all. His skin was that way becuz he fuckign vomits all over himself the frunken shit.

Briar: Okay, that’s gross.

"por hitler nous allons twoer tous les dos" and then jacub stabed that mothafucker in the face and talsy took out a baguette and fucked with it and hacub stopped that frenchy.

Asahi: Okay, so maybe it’s not getting good.

Cherry: Time for more bullshit. Yay.

"REBECCA GET DOWN" Alicia said and shot troy one two three for five six seven ayt nine tims and it was fucing gory. Then a tree fell on him! BUT HE GOT UP!

"we are imbucked with satan's blood you cannot defeat us!" they say except the freech one!

Briar: Good. Now kill Rebecca.

"NOOOO" I screamed! I was horrored by this situation! Then Edowerd appeared! And Tanishashqnua! And Angela too!

"I prithee protect thou life" EDowerd say! "BECAUSE I STILL LOVE THEE" and then edowerd went all claws and clawed the fucing shit out of Talsys bagette and destroyed her beray [AN: it's a Fench hat].

Cherry: Ah. Fuck. The Edward/Jacob love rivalry in here, too?

Cherry: Fuck that shit.

But troy stepped forward from his tree and it used vine whip to grab angela sort of like in hentai with the tentacles [AN: porn is wrong].

Cherry: Porn is fine. So long as it aint incest, child, or rape porn.

She yelled like a cat in heat! A female one!

"HELP ME!" she say!

"this is satan's wood it will fill you with his evil" Hawked say. "feel the evil overtake your daddy's blood girl". He was so evil! What a fucker you shuld go to his profile and spam hate messages. He is worse thana fucer he is a diseased excuse for an abortion!

Briar: Ah, so this is a real person.

Asahi: Probably one of the people who pointed out how this story was utter trash.

"EVIL" angela say and then she was once again!

Asahi: Surprising no one.

"fuck this shit" I waddled and then I took my new katana and slit troy's neck. His blood got all over my catholic schoolgirl miniskirt so I took off the miniskirt part and ran to my audi and got in it.

Cherry: Runnin about with no pants. Now that’s just obscene.

Jacub and Alicia and tasnishashanqua did to. But not edowerd. He wuld have to fucing dye right here if he ever wanted judahs forgiveness or salvashing.

Briar: Rude.

Briar: But I mean, justified, too. He never did apologize for assaulting you.

The lights slowly flickered on. At long last the story, the madness, the nightmare itself that was the Kronicals of Rebecca Swansin was over. It had felt like days, weeks even since the story had begun, though it had likely been only a couple of hours at best. The three participants simultaneously breathed sighs of relief, tired, but grateful that their strenuous task was finally finished.

“So…” Asahi spoke slowly, looking at his two companions carefully. “Final thoughts?”

Cherry looked at him, her expression like that of a woman who had just climbed out of Hell. “Asahi, Asahi, Asahi,” she shook her head at him. “We’ll be here for months if we tried to list every crime an sin this story committed.”

He frowned, still feeling his skin crawl from having to read something so… so terrible. “Let’s just say it was garbage and go home. I still can’t get over how she needlessly abused Bella,” his frown turned into a scowl. “This fanfic has turned me into a Bella fanboy. I hate it.”

“For what it’s worth,” Briar began, speaking carefully as she ran a hand through her hair. “As awful as it was, it was funny with the absurdity. And it was obviously intentionally written to be awful. Take a look at Chapters Thirty-Three, for instance. The sudden improvement in everything. Either her editor, Yamama, is an actual God for being able to take something so terrible and make into art, or, the more likely scenario, the atrocity of the story before and after was intentional. Further proof being Tanishashanqua, majority of the time the mouthful of a name was spelt right. It’s hard to believe someone who can’t spell Edward right once can spell Tanishashanqua right ninety-nine percent of the time.”

“Ugh. You raise a fair point,” Asahi confirmed and sighed. “Which, brings up a good point, something that ought to be said.”

Cherry blinked, “Oh?”

With that, Asahi slowly stood up, staring at the screen where they could assume a camera was hidden.

“Ladies, gentlemen, and everyone between. Allow me to tell you about trolls. A troll is someone who intentionally does things to aggravate and anger those around them. They will do anything and everything to get a negative reaction out of you, to get you mad and frothing at the mouth because they get a sick twist out of upsetting others. Trollfics are just another kind of it. Writers purposely writing something horrible or terrible, while denying knowing what a troll is. They know what they’re writing is bad, that their spelling and grammar is worse than a kindergartener. It’s because they’re doing it on purpose.

“The best way to handle a troll is to ignore them. Don’t give them a reaction, eventually they’ll give up and try somewhere else. We did the opposite, but I suppose we wouldn’t really be the entertainment you are apparently looking for if we ignored the bait. But, it’s best to just ignore trolls and trollstories, trying to rage against them is a losing battle.”

Cherry sighed, shrugging, “You’re right about that. We’re just givin’ the trolls exactly what they want when we yell at them. They’re weird like that.”

Standing up, Briar shook her head once more. “Anyway. See you guys next time.” With that, the Huntsman gathered the remnants of their wrappers and cups from the concession stand, tossing it on her way out, muttering about “McFlurries”, “Judah,” and “Unjustified Murders” as she left the theater.

Asahi grabbed his pile of books, tucking them under an arm as he gave Cherry a nod, making his way for the stairs and exit.

“Hey, Asahi?”

He stopped and turned, looking to Cherry who had a strange, pitying smile on her face. “Yeah?” he asked.

“I’m guessin’ this is probably a lot more painful for you than for Briar an I, right?” Cherry asked, but the way she poised it, it sounded more like a statement. “Yer the reader of the three of us, always with those books.”

Asahi was quiet for a moment, staring at her, trying to figure out some kind of double meaning, some kind of hidden intention. He found none. “Right,” he answered slowly. “I’m an avid reader, so these… poor attempts at writing are a rather serious affront in my perspective.”

“Thought as much,” Cherry nodded her head, her smile didn’t get any less sympathetic. “Don’t push yourself too much, okay? If ya can’t stand how offensive these stories get, don’t feel like ya got to force yourself to keep coming back.”

This felt like a bizarre conversation to him, and Asahi briefly wondered if Cherry’s brain got fried during that last story. “I’m well aware of that. I’m just as free to come and go as you are,” he reminded her carefully. “So, the same should be said to you. Don’t force yourself to come here if you don’t want to.”

Cherry laughed, grabbed her bag and her skateboard, “Right, right. Anyway, see you later, Asahi!”

He frowned as she bounded past him, pushing past the door with a hearty laugh. If he really tried, Asahi swore he could even hear the sound of her throwing her skateboard to the ground and taking off on it once she was on the otherside of the door. Though, it must have just been his imagination trying to compensate.

Briar and Cherry, they really were an odd bunch. Hell, the three of them were an odd combination for sure. But, Asahi figured that they made the stories bearable. No matter how awful the fics got, Asahi felt like he’d be able to stomach the crimes against literature if he had them around to help soften the blows.

But, for now, there really wasn’t any point loitering around in the now empty theater. He quietly ascended the stairs, stopping only to look at the empty seats one more time. Try as he might, he couldn’t really understand why this was happening, this experiment, this convergence in realities. Why them.

Did it even matter?

Maybe not, Asahi decided. Maybe it was best to not think about it too much.

#Twilight #mst3k style riffing #Fanfiction #Kronicals of Rebecca Swansin

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