#let’s try to survive another one
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And the fireworks are out! Happy 2025 everyone!
#let’s try to survive another one#also happy 3 year anniversary to when I got covid#boy that was some way to start 2022
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TW; SLIGHTLY SUGGESTIVE(???), Im not sure but it feels like I've done smth illegal ASKDJNADSFKJADNFS
I tried to draw smth cute again but ended up looking... uh...
but then I added in
Overall, intrusive thoughts won that night help--
#slightly suggestive#I actually cant tell since in context they just kissed here but just to be safe#I don't know how to draw an actual kiss drawing so have the aftermath of them having a kiss#But somehow it came out a bit sus especially with a bit of saliva(how else would you know this is like the after kiss? asdkfjnadskfjnad)#I know this would never happened canonically so lets pretend in another life they try romance and manon still survives#dead plate#dead plate game#dead plate fanart#rody lamoree#vince charbonneau#rody x vincent#just found out rody is canonically bi and biphobic which makes sense because of the era this was set in#still ship them tho idk why help ADSLKJFNADSFKJANDSFJDF#I swear it was supposed to be an oc drawing but I ended drawing these mfers again what the hell#the next one will deffo be a manon-related one if I have time
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Holds Natsuki Subaru in my hands
#re:zero#tal reads#I have. my current super loose overarching theory is#that in some grander Fate’s Design sense this boy is SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD#I don’t know WHY but I think he’s not supposed to survive#and that whatever Satella did with the return by death thing was basically a like#glitch in the universe that forces it to keep retrying until it finds the one (1) reality where he survives#you know your dr strange ‘in how many realities do we win’ ‘just one’ type thing#my WILDLY speculative theory about this is that there was another whole timeline that Subaru has forgotten#and that the entire story is a time travel/resurrection spell to save him gone wonky as hell#where the universe knows he isn’t supposed to be alive so IT KEEPS TRYING TO KILL HIM#but every time it succeeds it has to reset and let him try again#I HAVE VERY LITTLE EVIDENCE FOR THIS. TO BE CLEAR.#like I have a LITTLE but it is 92% just me Making Shit Up that sounds vaguely possible#but. regardless. my theory is that it’s not Like This just bc subaru sucks#it’s like this bc the game is rigged both for and against him simultaneously#so he’s gonna survive but it’s gonna suck the WHOLE time
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Finally finished sweet tooth s3. Having incredibly mixed feelings
#love the show. love it a lot. about to be a bitch in the tags anyways#it was. so so messy. they needed another season so bad. the alaska trip took up so much of the comics#and that was with the previously established cast#in the show they introduced a million new characters. gave us no time to get to know them before they were thrown head first into the plot#and condensed an arc that was almost half of the comics into the span of like 5 episodes#my boy singh. oh how they massacred by boy#i mean. okay. in the context of the show the arc wasn't horrible for him.#but i think his survival in the comic and his dedication of his life to making up for the mistakes of his past by helping people and hybrids#would've been so much more powerful than his random self sacrifice at the end of the show.#bc honestly it just seems like another impulsive act in his moral flip flop he'd been having for the last few episodes#rather than active choice to be better#and honestly i wanted to see his delusional paranoid religious breakdown from the comics put to screen so bad#it would've been great#i do like that he turned against zhang the second she started trying to talk about rani. that shit slapped#the several fake outs about Jepp's death were so stupid and unnecessary and repetitive#why are you baiting everyone. you're going to piss off the hardcore comic fans waiting for his death and confuse the show fans#either commit to killing him or stop pretending like you're brave enough to do it#why did they flip back so hard into the mystical vaguely eco fascist backstory and outcome of the comic#after spending two seasons trying to build a more scientific and less 'humanity must end' story for two seasons straight#they tried to make it seem less 'humanity must die' again at the end by ending the virus#which i guess might've been the best outcome available considering the source material and the limitations of it's ending#but idk. it felt weird#the writing this season was so much less subtle. it felt like the characters were constantly monologing directly at the camera#nothing could be left unsaid everyone had to say exactly what they meant#and it was all moral lessons the writers were trying to feed directly to the audience#i feel like they wrote themselves into a corner at the end of the last season#and they expected to have at least one more season to write themselves out of it before the ending#and if not. if this was the plan since the beginning. literally what. WHAT.#can not imagine the people who wrote the last two seasons sitting down and writing this#it won't let me add more tags but i have more thoughts. many more. tumblr is silencing me for speaking the truth /j
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"how many plants do you currently have"?
.......oh, uhhhh just a,. couple.....,,,.. lmao
*pushes the trays of leaves I have propagating in the bathroom out of view*
#roz does plont#the blur is less cuz of anything sensitive and more cuz of how cluttered my desk is lmao and it was pulling focus#can you believe this all (re)started cuz I noticed my long-neglected haworthia pupped lmao#and then my succulent fever got re-kicked#now I just Keep Needing More to do More Plont. or else I fiddle too much with my existing plants and end up overwatering etc them lmao..#I uhhhh also have another batch of leaves I'm letting callus before I stick on a prop tray lmao...#the prop tray has fungus gnats :') oh no#I will have to try some peroxide and see if it does the trick#some of these are cuttings so no telling of they will even survive. we will see#oh yeah I also have some variegated pothos in water and a zz plant in the bathroom#the zz plant was abandoned in the garage for. months lmao.. but it survived and it's even now putting out a new stem! the baby leaf just#started poking through these last couple days!#oh yeah this is my desk at home- I also have some purloined pothos cuttings in water at my desk at work#and also one of the haworthia pups but I do worry if that one gets enough light
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i literally only come here when i have a meltdown occasionally lol i miss when i was a happy kid on this account but that will stay where it was made like 3000 pages ago
#i think i have a few thousand pages but im too lazy to check i can only make an educated guess lololol#i remember being so enthusiastic in my posts#now i am DEPRESSED and a total downer LOL#like i had 3 arguments today i totally cried for each one of them too#same person#definitely in prooobably the lowest part of my life. maybe second lowest? im not living out of my car anymore so yea second lowest ig#plus im not actively being cheated on so yea second lowest#still lower in some aspects tho life is shit#ik its morbid to mention but#another#suicide mention#is like i routinely think abt how im going out and its like everyone thinks its so sad and depressing but its such a relief and joyous tho?#i guess the happiness i tie to dying is just depressing to normal people or people who care a little bit about me or just care abt stranger#cuz i get sad when i see strangers tlk about dying by their hand but its also like... i want u to feel relief and happiness n the only way#is dying??? lol#for some of us not all but im like#the type that is so sick of EVERY aspect of life and nothing is worth it. at all lol living and waking up is so mf difficult#breathing is a chore blinking is a chore washing and moving and ugh#then there's jobs and trying to survive and stability and taxes and people who will get you jailed and cause trouble#yea too many layers to life i would rather not#it's not a sad thing tho its just a relief i cannot waaaaait to breathe my last breatg#breath#i hear all these great things about people with NDEs who feel relief and happiness during dying like bruh let me have that
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Please tell us your Creepers Origins? I'm dying to know.
-Incycreepedia2
ok but likw actually its probably like. a clayface situation yknow. radioactive substance = creature stuff like rhat . which is probably fairly common in gotham cause its. nuclear new york. creeper and jack are likkeeeee. basically the same guy, the only real difference is creeper is like. happier? hes chill . like jack is goofy hes a silly guy but hes like being bullied by a different rogue every other week on live television so like hes Gotta be able to destress somehow and if rhat means catastrophic goofy moment then . so be it
#jack ryder is just a silly guy and creeper is. jack ryder but. sillier!#frolicking. in his lane. moisturized. unbothered#except for the .2? guys who might want to do silly little experiments on him#but likkeee. who Isnt trying to be little lab experiments honestly#hes just vibing tho despite it all#another villain blew up a building? 😐😑 dont even see it man hes down at the carnival doing god knows whag#the only reason the news station lets him do whatever is because hes the only one who can survive#4 different acts of terroism/kidnapping and or mass chemical leak within a single week. somehow#and rhe only reason he stays with the station. well. lets just say. MOENY 💰💰💰!!!!!#🃏.chat
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i just wanna make you feel okay .
・ 𝙳𝙾𝙽'𝚃 𝚂𝙼𝙸𝙻𝙴 𝙰𝚃 𝙼𝙴 𝚂𝚃𝙰𝚁𝚃𝙴𝚁𝚂 : ... open!
jill is all round shapes: ㅤ upturned, the sun glinting off a glacier, ㅤ gentle lines surrounding ruined, wobbly hands.ㅤ it's a bit of a marvel, ㅤ but mostly grating, ㅤ that jill has maintained that fluttering, desperate ache for connection, a far-off, paper curled memory of extravagantly worn clothes and borrowed jewelry, a worn down but merciful heart.ㅤ an absolute,ㅤ a woman with fingers curled around the handle of a knife; ㅤ a testament to jill's strength, plunging through.
benedikta has become warped, bubbled up in a blacksmith's forge,ㅤ the burnt edge of a cigar.ㅤ she could blame it on garuda's madness. on her liege's claim of her obedience. ㅤ but the truth of it ── she's too used to the leash, the chain and collar. freedom only looks like freedom when she's rubbed the skin off her knees, tasting rotting peaches in her mouth.
this proffered kindness is a sword drawing blood; ㅤ it's that shift in a man's eyes when he gazed down at the silver, repetitious lashes at her back: ㅤ derelict thing, crippled outside her mother's womb, cradled in impoverished arms.ㅤ it chafes like an unsharpened blade. ㅤ that's why they are more incompatible than they ever have been, jill bashing against a carefully built wall of benedikta's self-flagellation. it makes benedikta feel vile; ㅤ odious and blistering with infection.
lifting her chin, benedikta clings at a weak facsimile of pride. ㅤ ‘‘ then leave me alone.ㅤ i feel the best when i can't see the sight of you. ’’ ㅤ her sneer is devastating; an anthill being crushed underfoot. ㅤ it doesn't matter if it's true or not. ㅤ some days are better than others ── but unless jill turns winter into chilled splinters in her skin, has shiva pit beauty against savagery, then anything offered is a vile confirmation: ㅤ there's weakness there, soft-bellied,ㅤ a prey animal soundlessly screaming under a hunter's ministrations.
‘‘ better yet, ’’ ㅤ benedikta sways forward, beseeching or threatening or both, ㅤ ‘‘ you should seek retribution. ㅤ revenge.ㅤ i left you to die. ’’
#glacierites#:)#{ * 𝙸𝙽𝙱𝙾𝚇 : let's run ‚ let's keep running ‚ let's swallow so much red that our mouths become escape .#{ * 𝙳𝚈𝙽. 𝙶𝙻𝙰𝙲𝙸𝙴𝚁𝙸𝚃𝙴𝚂 : it's the same old story : a few people just trying ‚ one way or another ‚ to survive .
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i was back on track to finish my soa playthrough for a while there--but then i reached xan's we-survived-bodhi celebration scene
#i knew it was coming but when xan actually said his first line i force quit the game. i'm so serious#the whiplash that comes with me writing & drawing my ace xadri delusions when meanwhile bg2 xan swans around as though he knows what i want#i know. I KNOW. that deep down he would gladly express his love differently if only he knew !!!#god just let me reach through the screen. either to have a civil conversation or to strangle him i'm not sure which#i might really have to break out the edits here i'm not sure i can survive this one as-is#'sovo it's just a massage and another implied sex scene' I KNOWWW#but it's like--*this* is how he expresses his joy/gratitude??? to radri??? who has thoughts and feelings i've built up in my head??#and she's supposed to be into it??? when there's no way she can be??? and she would try so hard to make him happy#and she just has to. choose the negative option. 'not tonight xan'. for the MILLIONTH time#she WANTS to be with him! but just not like this! it's honestly killing me. i'm being forced into a miscommunication trope#with two people who can literally mind meld and read each other's emotions#i mean okay they can't really read each other's emotions at the moment BUT THEY STILL KNOW HOW TO TALK.
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…pleasepleaseplease believe me that I want only what you can freely give, that I can wait instead if you need me to until you feel like you can give unrestrained.
I just want to be allowed to stay.
#tiger’s roar#how many ways can two idiots declare their respect and affection without actually saying I Love You I Love You Too#how many ways can two idiots express indirectly that the love is alterous platonic romantic queerplatonic#that it doesn’t MATTER how its defined what shape it takes#…because the draw is there.#I want to stay but I will leave if asked.#They want to give but are beating themselves up with shame that they can’t#…but. the draw to be friends survived TWO. YEARS. one of silence. another of misunderstandings. it’s still there.#maybe it shouldn’t be. but it is.#if I haven’t gone anywhere already…then I’m not going to#unless I’m told to.#I’m…stubbornly loyal like that#I just need to have the Assurance of how the other feels and what they want and what they need and the shape of Reality#I will stay if staying will not take someone’s autonomy away from them#and I will try to find a way to get this to work out. and things can be fluid. I just don’t want to feel blownoff or like I’m clinging#maybe this looks ‘the same’ to you but. it’s not.#accept that I will stay. that I will accept only so much as you can do. that I can wait#let go of the shame. I’ll let go of my insecurity that I’m a catfish leech.#believe that I’ll stay. I’ll believe that you want that connection too#and we’ll figure this out
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#diana's music diary#good evening... I don't have much of a memory right now so I'll just talk about the present and future#I feel pretty bad so I might be quieter today but also maybe not.. we'll see I guess..?#I'm not really looking forward to another psychiatric evaluation.. those things are hell for me.. but I have one coming and I have to go#today I'm just going to try to survive probably and maybe spend some time with my partner#love you guys.. if today is good that would be nice so let's keep trying okay?
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My brother needs to go to therapy. He has got huge family problems. His childhood was messed up.
#i really hope he gets enough amount of sleep everyday now#he doesn't reply/engage in conversations.. don't speak much.. kind of a silent person.. but there has been times when he was all too good#with talking to someone#Does early twenties really make you feel so much? I hope and i know and i know he will get better#so many harsh things have happened to bhaiya.. i would have never tolerated it all#i would be slamming each's face#so let me write this in my tumblr's diary#his underpants were filled with stones and his shirt was ripped when he was in 4th grade by his own sisters(cousins)#They had the “privileges” .. noone in family could speak against them cuz guess what their mother was a survival and a truly good person#So nothing was said to their kids#Anyways now we're good.. have many fun memories#Another time when he was in hostel in 6th grade some bad kids came in the bathroom camein bath#room & put bucket on his head and hit him hard#Horrible experiences#One time he was slapped by papa when papa and mummy was having a fight#And let me tell ya my father's palms are very big.. can be comforting but when applied with force one can break#I really hope everything gets better.. i'll try hard... Didn't expected april to be such a havoc-ing month#Please be kind 2023 to everyone#take the road less traveled by*
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I wished people in the fandom interpreted Henry more then "sad guy trying to get back his daughter and has no other flaws" last I saw
I mean you have a point honestly. Because he’s not William people tend to pretend he’s totally flawless, when he’s definitely pretty fucked up on his own. They kinda wrote a whole novel trilogy about that.
I’ll admit I’m kind of guilty of this one too, though I do try to show off a more flawed side by having him similarly spiral into obsession. It’s I think a thing of like, everyone in fnaf sucks. On some level. But no one is really as bad as Afton, so people tend to overlook the others’ flaws at the cost of doing them a total injustice.
#in my au/rewrite/whatever this is#henry did care about michael and didn’t want him to die at the end of ffps#but he allowed him to risk his life on a suicide mission the whole rest of the time#and only cares about him surviving because he sees him as charlie#as another victim of Afton. a blameless child trying to save everyone#just like his daughter#the michael he wants to save is a mirror image of charlie#the michael he lets burn is the real one
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#i hope more people understand why Israel massacring and then trying to force whoever survived towards Egypt#is still a form of genocide and ethnic cleansing#except you would be roping another country into your disgusting crimes of ethnic cleansing#this is one of the main reasons why Egypt won’t let Palestinians come in#But obviously a LOT of Egyptians are over there at the border#civilians and military alike#trying to provide aid#free palestine#end israeli apartheid#israeli war crimes#ethnic cleansing
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Heyoo! I wanted to ask if you maybe happened to have more pictures of the joggers on plus sized people, on top of the couple on your store site? Your designs look so cool, I've just recently started to embrace more fun colors and patterns and would love your joggers but I live in europe and need to make sure I get the perfect size on the first try since the shipping costs more :D
Omg, sorry about not seeing this until now! Thank you!! Unfortunately, I don't really have any more pics than what are in the shop :[ Most of my jogger designs have come about after I left Fresh Hot Flavors, and I've pretty much only been modeling things myself these days since FHF were the other models (besides occasionally my brother modeling something, but he's even smaller than me..). There might be some more examples in my "happy customers" tag here on tumblr though!
#this is still something i gotta deal with for sure#i feel like i've been barely holding on trying to survive and putting out one fire after another this year#so i still haven't figured out hiring models and all of that :[#i'm always doing things last minute (like today's jester and wizard pics for tomorrow 😅) which means continuing to rely on just me#since i'm always around#D;!#i'm thinking about starting some thing to let customers submit pics to use in the shop and get gift cards or somethin' in exchange#and i also want to find a new reviews app that lets people add pictures#many things to do.. so little time...#ask#witch vamp#anon
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my haaaaaands are still fucked uuuuuup but when they’re unfucked up i’m gonna draw smth so sexy and delicious for my new skyrim oc i can see the comp in my mind’s eye it’d just make my hands fall off if i tried to draw it
#he’s a liiiiiiitle bit of a serial killer so i’m envisioning him in like a white gown/robe with his hair up like in fucking. ella enchanted#in the garden with caryalind thallery but the knife behind his back is just coated in blood and there’s a pile of bodies behind him that we#can see but cary can’t see. i LOVE cary btw if you haven’t tried him as a follower highly highly recommend#vaynis is a character i didn’t think i’d get all that attached to i just wanted to try out the ancient falmer mod and then i got like. SO#attached to him immediately. he’s not actually an ancient falmer he’s just like. a non betrayed falmer who’s 23. his dad was like the#ultimate ‘i survive everything bc i’m good at hiding’ kinda guy who was a child when the snow prince died and he just fucked off into the#jerall mountains for forever basically. and another falmer (much younger) stumbled on him up there and was like ‘dude wtf if you have#immortality magic why do you live in a wizard shack in the mountains’ and he was like ‘well. i’m wicked scared all the time you see’#so in exchange for teaching her the immortality spell he was like ‘will you have a baby with me so the falmer don’t die out’ and she was#like ‘yeah ok but i’m not raising this fucking baby. i’m leaving i’m not a mom. you won’t make me a mom’ and he was like ‘yeah sure ok’#secretly thinking if he built her a tower she’d stay. so every day he’d build the tower bit by bit with magic and everyday she’d plan to#leave and like in a fairytale they had the ‘i’m going to leave’ ‘i know’ conversation but then vaynis was born and she actually DID leave bc#she wasn’t a mom! she told him that! but he was like shocked bc he was a moron. and so he locked vaynis in his wizard tower and only let him#out to teach him how to hunt and track and forage. and vaynis really wanted to see the world but his dad would never change. so he planned#to leave and he picked himself out a nice breton adventurer to seduce into taking him along only when his dad found out he killed the breton#and locked vaynis back in the tower. and vaynis waited and watched and planned and pretended like he was sorry. and then one day he#knifed him in his sleep. and took his shit and escaped. but auriel wasn’t super happy about that so he shipwrecked him. and ever since theb#vaynis has been pretty pathetic. he’s working on it but like. it really is kinda embarassing to watch. anyway his new scheme for glory is to#join the thalmor and he IS really pretty so this thalmor agent in solitude was like ‘hey the heir to the aldmeri dominion is also here and#we like. really need him back and with his head in the game. the nords are stupid they think you’re a altmer but like. i know a bitch whose#race is supposed to be extinct when i see one. you seduce caryalind thallery back into line and we’ll help you do whatever you wanna do to#restore the falmer. ideally it’s integrate with us.’ so vaynis obviously takes that fucking opportunity but problems arise bc caryalind#isn’t quite as seduceable as previously thought. yeah he’s flirty but he’s also looking for something serious and trying to become a better#person. so vaynis is on a journey of ‘get aldmeri prince to marry me and have his baby to achieve greatness’ when they stumble into helgen#after alduin attacks (bc as we all know i’m addicted to the ‘the prisoner dies and akatosh has to pick a new dragonborn’ narrative’ and he#) and akatosh picks vaynis honestly? to be funny. i love interpreting akatosh as a smartass it’s so funny to me#‘yeah there’s a whole world riding on this but like. wouldn’t it be kinda hilarious to see what happens?’#alternatively maybe akatosh and auriel are one in the same. you decide#anyway becoming the dragonborn really complicates this plan like. MOST severely
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