#let panyuan eat rocks 2025

[sillygoofyqueer]

You know… if pangolin demons have teeth, they probably don’t need to swallow rocks to help them break down food.

Instead, maybe they can give their armored scales special properties by swallowing certain rocks! For example, if they copper they can get veins of copper in their scales. If they swallow enough gemstones, their scales start to become gemlike. Etc.

Also, let SY and Binghe be friends! Maybe when Binghe goes to select his sword, or is sent on some chore before that point, he meets Panyuan. Panyuan sees he’s sad, but a sweetheart, and decides to adopt him as an older brother.

Binghe is a Wan Jian disciple now, and there is nothing anyone can do about it! (I mean, they probably could do something about it, but Wei Qingwei won’t allow it. What Panyuan wants, Panyuan gets!)

Hello hello heellllloooo!!!

Firstly, excellent workaround for all this, because I wholeheartedly need Panyuan to eat rocks, I just think it would be so funny. Also!! The scales idea is so cute! And hilarious.

I mean, imagine you're Wei Qingwei, and different materials have been going missing - you just got a shipment of copper and it's lighter than you remembered it to be. You're confused, and you mention this casually to your precious son, asking if he knows where it has been. He stares up at you with his big guileless eyes, chewing on something that sounds suspiciously crunchy as he shakes his head. His scales are glimmering with the copper decorating them, and when you point it out he stares up at you blankly before indiscreetly shoving more copper into his mouth.

Your son is not a very good liar.

Also!!! While I completely agree that Panyuan and Binghe can be great pals, Wei Qingwei would never poach his shixiong's disciples <3 (He will, however, invite him over often because even Shen Jiu can't deny Panyuan's adorable eyes.) Also Shen Jiu is too busy focusing on Panyuan to care about Binghe outside of Panyuan being like "people are bullying my best friend (⁠っ⁠˘̩⁠╭⁠╮⁠˘̩⁠)⁠っ" and Shen Jiu is like "my disciples are unruly and cruel this cannot stand" (this is my comfort AU he's not going to be malevolent to Binghe)

Cut to Binghe being like "I'm in the woodshed" and both Shen Jiu and Wei Qingwei looking over like "literally why are you in there???" "I was told there wasn't any space" and then we shift to Ming Fan and co being like "I feel a sudden bout of fear...."