#let cori go batshit

[second-wife-playbook]

Last Drink (Coronis Drabble)

(tw; dark themes, mass murder)

The Marquette is cold.

The three siblings did not often gather for tea. It was often just the two eldest, talking of their lives, their plans, their social calendar. But once in a while, they sought entertainment for these tea-times. Someone to compare, to complain to, to chastise. There was only one easy target, one who could be plucked from her perch and summoned at will.

Coronis drank very meagerly from her cup and kept her eyes down. Even sandwiched between Stella and Andrealphus, she was trying to hide.

"At least Stolas can offer a nice place to live! Even if living with his dishwater-dull arse is about as exciting as watching paint dry-"

"Well that's hardly our little Cori's fault, now is it? The market for marriage is so slim these days, and it's hardly easy finding a match for someone on the older side-"

She was not there. That was what she told herself. I am simply not here. They already talk like she isn't sitting right in front of them.

I'm not here. She thought. I'm not...really here.

"Cori? Cori? Coronis!"

She snapped to attention. "Yes?"

"Weren't you listening?" Andrealphus made a disappointed look. "Do focus when someone is talking to you. Stella was just saying she had a nice idea for the ball next week."

Coronis swallowed hard. "Is that so?"

"Oh it's delightful." Stella smirked. "It's the most darling little game, and best of all, you'll be part of it!"

A cold lump formed in her stomach. She already had goosebumps from sitting in this room. She didn't want to know. She didn't want to play. "Is...is that right?" She muttered nervously. "What kind of game?"

"Just a little game of numbers." Her cruelty was keen and sharp-edged. Stella wore her edges beautifully, but that was what made them horrific. There was never a Goetia as dangerous as one who held grace and wickedness with a careless, lovely hand. "We're going to let everyone guess what your dowry is!"

Andrealphus chuckled. "Though if they undersell it, I think I'll take them up on the offer."

Something...

Pricked.

I have to play this game. She realized. And it's going to go too far. The siblings were already chortling at the idea of it. Making plans, thinking of how amusing it would be to see all those numbers put into place for a twisted game of profit and value. And I'm going to be sold like a cow for the lowest bid...going to be just another toy to play with.

The cup in her hand began to sweat.

The Marquette was a little less cold. But Coronis felt that perhaps...her mind was made up.

______

"Andrealphus, there's something I need to talk to you about."

The ball was only three days off. Plans were being made by the caterer. Coronis was certain the guests were clued into the secret game; she had been forced to sit through Stella's little get-togethers with her repulsive friends and heard a lot of sinister giggles gestured her way.

Andrealphus didn't look up from his desk. His youngest sister visiting the Marquette on her own was rare, but not worth diverting his attention. "Mm? Make it quick, I'm very busy."

"Do you mean to marry me off like you said?"

That earned one short glance.

Just one.

"You're overripe as far as brides go. And even if we're immortal, one does not want to risk their future with a spinster." He said with the most casual air. "I have done what I could when you were young enough for it, but even I cannot achieve miracles."

"But you're going to do it over a game?"

His face curled into a sneer. "What of it?" He snapped. "You haven't been an active participant yourself Cori. You can't go leeching off our parents and me for long. I've done what I can for you." And yet Coronis could tell that in his impatience and anger, that could not be farther from the truth. "Consider it a charming anecdote to tell your future children. You'll do well with anyone in attendance. Don't be so selfish."

Had Andrealphus looked up, he might have seen Hell's rarest sight.

Anger.

"....you will go through with it?" Coronis's tone might have hinted at her fury. "Whoever wins?"

"Yes, yes." His tone was impatient. Wishing she would go away. "Is that all?"

"....no. I only wanted to ask if I could purchase something for the engagement toast." She continued. Her voice was calm. "If you're really going through with it, we should celebrate it properly."

A huff, a sigh, and he turned his chair around to pay more attention to the paperwork of his principality. "Oh I suppose. I cannot exactly expect us to be looking cheap if we're celebrating a marriage in the family." Andrealphus puffed. "Go and tell the housekeeper to spare no expense. I'll have some money put aside for you to buy yourself a little treat."

Coronis watched his back with a long, long gaze.

You look so safe. She thought. Do you feel safe? Have you always felt safe?

"Thank you." She curtsied. "I'll find something worthy of the event."

_______

The ball arrived. Coronis was dressed a touch better for the event, and though Stella gave her a nasty look at the shimmery quality of her gown, she did resisted her natural urge to stain it or tear it to shreds. "Only the best for my little sister's engagement ball! Once we find out the winning number that is-" And shot her the nastiest smirk.

Coronis did not speak. She watched.

There was a big glass jar where people wrote their names and guessed the number. Everyone was laughing, laughing. I didn't even put a number in. Said one. I bet a couple of bottles of Chateau du Bachs.

That's too much! Laughed another. I just counted the change in my wallet!

The Marquette was growing warmer. Andrealphus held his ice magic thick and heavy, and stood by his ice sculptures. But something was too warm. He complained, brought a servant to turn the temperature down. It was still too warm.

Coronis watched him sweat.

The winner was about to be revealed.

Andrealphus took center stage, but found himself surprised. Coronis had indeed procured a white wine for the event, high-quality, vintage. One of the last strains of Nemeses Vineyards. Those grapes withered away and the vineyard with it over a hundred years ago, but Coronis had found some surviving bottles after all. Enough for the guests.

She poured it into his glass. There was sweat gathering on the sides, but the wine was so peerless and pure it was like liquid light, and shimmered prettily in his glass. "Why thank you-" He said, smiling and simpering prettily. "-now was all this so hard? I think the winner is going to surprise you."

"...yes I imagine so." She answered. Andrealphus raised an eyebrow. Did she always speak so coldly? "I hope you'll respect my request for a wedding gift when it's all said and done."

"Spoiled." He teased, but didn't elaborate. He could always say no, after all. "Well be a good girl and come with me."

They took to the center of the room, Andrealphus dinging his glass. "Come and gather round everyone! We've got a special treat, and a special announcement!" One hand lifted up his younger sisters. The glasses were being poured by imps, passed around. "Tonight announces the formal engagement of my darling sister Cori to a very special guest among us!" There was a ripple of giggles and laughter. They were going to find out the winner of the bet. "It breaks my heart to see her all grown up! A toast, all of us!"

The glasses were raised. Andrealphus drank his deep. The flavor was exquisite. So pure, so, so fragrant-

"Andrealphus?"

"Hmm?"

Coronis held her glass. It was still full. "I thought of what I want for my wedding gift?"

"Oh?" Why did she look so cold? Why did he feel so hot? "What is it?"

"....choke."

Andrealphus heard the shattering of many glasses before he realized he couldn't breathe. He opened his mouth to ask why, and black blood gushed forth from his throat.

The horror set in suddenly, like wildfire. Stella had been sneering, smirking in the front row, but now looked absolutely terrified as she squawked and clutched her throat, coughing black blood and bile, wheezing as her high voice was reduced to a whimper. Everyone was gasping, coughing, spitting, and the peerless icy floors were being besmirched in blood, spit and bile.

Andrealphus could not breathe. He felt his airways clogging up.

Coronis stood over him and tipped the contents of the wine over his head.

It burned.

It burned!!!!

"My contribution to the wine." She answered. She sounded so cold. So, so cold. "I thought a little holy water would spice things up."

You traitor! You bitch! He tried to scream, his bloody hands grasping at her dress. You've killed us, you've ruined us you psychopath you witch-

"Aaaaagghhh-"

The voice that came out instead was so tiny. So weak.

The edges of his vision went black. Coronis seemed to be relaxing, sighing as if she'd finished a particularly laborious task. "You've been pushing me for so long. You've been hurting me for so long." She said. It was almost mournful, and might have been mistaken for pity if her expression wasn't so pitiless. "Did you think I wouldn't retaliate? Not even once?"

You weren't supposed to fight back. Andrealphus thought, eyes bulging. You can't fight back, you can't.

He fell. The floor was hot and sticky with blood. The horrific sound of a hundred choking royals echoed around him. I feel so cold, I feel so cold- He thought, his body spasming in terror. -I don't want to die I don't want to die-

____

"Coronis!"

The Goetia snapped to attention.

"Yes?"

"Pay attention." Andrealphus said, a touch annoyed. "Stella was saying the next ball is going to be a week from now. Are you going or not?" He frowned. "Do tell me you're not going to hole up at Mommy and Daddy's house again."

What was that stare on her face? Andrealphus couldn't understand the stunned look, the utter surprise. Just where was her head going when these conversations were happening?

"S-sorry. I wasn't listening." She said. "I was...somewhere else."

She didn't finish her drink as it would turn out.

Andrealphus wondered what was wrong with it.



[homosandhomies]

My favorite solo from each main character on glee (because why not)

SUE: Vogue. “WILL SCHUESTER I HATE YOU”

KURT: Rose’s Turn. Chris Colfer rarely got songs that highlighted ALL his vocal strengths. This song used everything. He had a strong head voice, an amazing mix, and he can EMOTE WITH EVERY INCH OF HIS LIFE. No wonder he got the Golden Globe.

QUINN: This Is A Man’s World. This scene is ridiculous, but out of context the song absolutely slaps. Diana can BELT and she deserved to do it more.

ARTIE: Stronger. Probably my favorite Britney song. Kevin ate. That is all.

PUCK: Only the Good Die Young. This song is so fun and I think Puck’s voice is very underrated. A good ol’ jam. Thank you for repping the Jewish community king ❤️

WILL: Sway. It’s a shame that we never talk about his voice because HOLY SHIT MATTHEW MORRISON IS INCREDIBLE. This man is so talented and we never acknowledge it because of Will Schuester’s shenanigans.

BLAINE: Somewhere Only We Know. You can hate Blaine all you want but you can’t deny the POWER of this song. The love in his eyes is sickening I am not okay right now

FINN: I’ve Gotta Be Me. Given the fact that Cory didn’t have any singing experience before, this song makes me so fucking happy because you can see how much he had grown as a singer, but also how proud he was of himself! Look at him go!!! (Bonus: If I’m bending the rules in terms of what qualifies as a solo I would 100% make his Paradise By the Dashboard Light. That was his undoubtedly his very best vocal performance. It’s SO FUCKING GOOD it makes me go batshit.)

RACHEL: My Man. “She may be difficult but boy can she sing.”

BRITTANY: Run the World. The dancing is definitely the more impressive part of this number, but it still sounds great! This song really highlighted Heather’s strengths, when most of her songs weren’t very memorable in my opinion.

MIKE: Cool. Maybe Tina should be a professional vocal coach because damn look at him go!! Idk why an Asian kid wanted to play the role of a leader of a white supremacist group but at least he sounds great 🤷‍♀️

MERCEDES: I Will Always Love You. Literally every single Mercedes song is perfect, so this was the hardest one for me. This means I had to base it on acting. And she DELIVERS here. It should be illegal to be this talented.

TINA: Because You Loved Me. The fact that this is one of TWO solos that Jenna actually got to finish infuriates me. She was ROBBED because she is an amazing singer.

SANTANA: Nutbush City Limits. LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, MISS NAYA RIVERA. HOLY SHIT. Finn saying before the song, “They say that true divas aren’t really mortal” is so true. This woman was an absolute icon and I will always be blown away by her talent.

JAKE: Let Me Love You (Until You Learn to Love Yourself). It’s so EARNEST and HEARTFELT and Jacob Artist popped off with the acting. And the falsetto!! God it’s just beautiful.

EMMA: Getting Married Today. This is a trio, not a solo, but it’s so fucking good that I HAD to do it. That is literally one of the hardest female songs on Broadway, and for some reason they had Jayma sing it even FASTER than the original version? I can’t imagine the stress of trying to do that, but she was perfect.

SAM: Copacabana. This is just a really fun song! Everyone’s having a good time and Chord sounds amazing.

RYDER: Your Song. This is my favorite Elton John song, and boy was it done justice. The acting is really good in this scene. The mix of anxiety and earnestness coming from Ryder is adorable. He had great chemistry with whoever that girl was. (On a storyline note, I hated how this all developed though. If it had gone my way, Unique would confess it was her, then Ryder would sing this directly to Unique.)

KITTY: Signed, Sealed, Delivered I’m Yours. I just really like this number. Obsessed with Becca’s high notes.

MARLEY: Wrecking Ball. The cheating storyline with Bree was so fucking stupid and shouldn’t have happened. That being said, Melissa ATE what they gave her and left zero crumbs. She really came in like a wrecking ball.

UNIQUE: I Know Where I’ve Been. THIS SONG MAKES ME GO FUCKING CRAZY!!! THE TRANS CHOIR!!!! THE ACTING!!!!! THE FUCKING HIGH NOTE!!!!!! IT’S JUST SO GOOD I CAN’T HANDLE IT!!!!!!! This is the best part of season 6, full stop. THE most underrated Glee song ever. I will not accept criticism towards this opinion.

[dungeons-and-dragon-age]

Hello! ✨

You asked for some serious tea, and I'll give the favour back. What about Anders and Meredith? :3

[ask game]

Oh boy, getting right to the meat huh? xD (ty for the ask!)

Anders

First impression: "Lmfao. Already love this dude." I saw him first in Awakening and i still love his character intro there so much fjsdljdfl. His animation/body language and the "wans't me." when the Warden runs into him is very fun.

Impression now: Literal embodiment of poor little meow meow. Kind of an ass but one of the most intriguing characters in the series. The fandom does him dirty by woobifying him

Favorite moment: Well again, love his DAA intro lol, but his DA2 intro also kicks ass. The way he's immediately ready to throw hands if sb threatens the clinic... kind of sad, really, but also very badass

Idea for a story: .. wish i had one :') Would love sth about his youth and his time in the Circle & with Karl, or his POV in Amaranthine.

Unpopular opinion: I do not like his romace. And before yall come at me fkldjsl, i mean it as in, i don't like how it is framed? Like. I think the romance is super intense and intriguing! But imo it does not feel healthy at all in the way that it is portrayed (especially the rivalmance, but i have gripes with rivalmances in general), and I wished the games would treat it more as "Anders (and potentially Hawke) are Very Unwell and not treating this relationship the way they should, rather than "this is fine :)"

Favorite relationship: Justice! For obvious reasons, i am sure xD Truth be told i am not the person to turn to abt meta or hcs about them, but i do love

Favorite headcanon: As said above, basically anything to do with him and Justice. Absolutely love seeing different interpretations of how they interact post possession. Also sth that is practically canon to me, but i love the HC that Hawke (regardless of romance) lets him stay at their estate for refuge, and/or lets him use the expansive basement as an extension to his clinic (ik the entrance being right beside the clinic doesn't make much sense lol, but also: Kirkwall canonically has elaborate tunnel systems under the surface, so why shouldn't there be one that leads up to the Hawke estate?)

Meredith

First impression: This is the bitch??? Who allowed you to have a badass intro ftw. More composed and polite than expected. (re: her Actual Intro Scene, i know she's present behind the scenes right from the start)

Impression now: Love to hate her. Themes. Narratives. Still a bitch tho.

Favorite moment: Well. Her intro was cool xD DA2 has a way of doing that. Also cannot deny that her going batshit with that red lyrium and animating the gallows statues was pretty damn cool.

Idea for a story: Meredith POV from anywhere in Act 2 onwards. Yes it's easy to assume what she was doing and why but i wanna Know. I wanna look into her brain.

Unpopular opinion: Hmm dunno if i have one? Idk if this is unpopular but i think the very direct and very personal power she has over Hawke and their immediate surroundings makes her feel more threatening than either Loghain or Cory

Favorite relationship: Well. Hawke. Unsurprisingly xD Biting them like a chew toy.

Favorite headcanon: Hmm drawing a blank on this one rn x'D Might come back to it when i think of one dsfjdf

[oqulixs]

𝗬𝗼𝘂’𝗿𝗲 𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸?

yeah… i’m back !! this got me feeling like cory kenshin. but hi idk how long i can keep posting for. i might leave, post, leave, post, then leave again. who knows tbh

summary// Y/n left for their original home, Toman thought it was for good. Until, Y/n came back. And to an utter shit show.

warnings// mentions death, SPOILERS

pairings// ReaderxTokyoRev

It was good to be back! Wasn’t it? I thought this was going to be amazing, seeing everyone again. Unfortunately due to time zones I couldn’t keep in contact with them. I wonder what’s changed. I wonder how Mikey and the gang is doing.

Y/n walked to Mitsuya’s house till in front of the door. This was so exciting! They haven’t seen each other in what feels like decades. Knocking softly but loud enough for the ones inside to hear, two young girls opened the door wide open. Y/n’s eye widened in awe. “Luna! Mana! you two are so big!” The pair started to squeal with happiness. “Y/n! You’re back!” They both engulfed them into a hug. “Girls. I can’t breathe”.

They backed off letting Y/n suck in some air. “Where’s Takashi guys?” Their smiles dropped, and a look of sadness was replaced. “He’s not doing well at the moment. Maybe you will cheer him up. It’ll be a surprise!”

Sad? Why was he sad? And what the fuck was going on around here. Usually Y/n would see Takemichi, Draken, and Mikey bickering like cats and dogs somewhere. But it’s practically empty now. Where the fuck was the gang?

“We’ll show you to his room.” As they approached the door, Y/n felt sweat beads forming on their forehead. This was incredibly nerve racking, they haven’t seen each other in years. Now they’re coming back so suddenly.

“Go on. Knock.” Luna ushered them. Four soft knocks will do it. Their first shook slightly. The anxiousness was really catching up to them. “Not now guys. Please.” A faint and muffled voice could be heard from the other side. Luna and Mana rolled their eyes together. “Just open it and go inside.”

They whispered just in case he could hear everything that was taking place. Twisting the knob stopping half way then continuing with the irritating creaking noise. They saw scattered papers with drawings on them, fabrics laying on the floor, a little light coming from a lamp illuminating only parts of the room. And of course Mitsuya, slouched over with his head down.

“Girls I said not now-” he paused. The sight of Y/n left him in shock. And they froze as well, not even noticing the two girls walking off.

They stared not knowing what to say. His hair has grown out, he had a bread, an unintentional one at that. His dark circles were far more darker than they could last remember and his eyes were bloodshot red. He looked tired, not the sleepy kind. But the mentally exhausted kind.

“Y/n, you’re back?” Tears were forming at the brim of his eyes. He quickly got up to squeeze his old friend into a huge hug. This was hard to process for Y/n.

He looks.. Horrible.

“Takashi?” He pulled back to look them in the eyes. Worry was noticed all over their facial expressions. “Yeah?” “What’s going on here?” He took a step back. and swallowed hard.

Where did he begin. Oh yeah our best friend actually was killed, Mikey’s gone batshit crazy, Takemichi thinks he can save everyone and I’m in a depressive state at the moment.

Yeah. That’ll do one for Y/n.

He sighed and sat on the ground preparing to tell Y/n everything.

Many tears later the two found theirselves in front of a grave.

Two graves to be exact.

As if one cue rain started pouring down on the two.

“He’s actually dead. And Mikey barely even cares.” Mitsuya whispered softly with his voice cracking a bit. He really tired to keep his composure in front of Y/n but it was really no use. He basically lost his brother.

He just wanted to crawl up in a ball for a while. Alone. With no one else around. But Y/n made him feel secure. He didn’t want Y/n to go but the was aware they had other visits to make.

“You should go see Takemichi and Hinata.”

HEYYYYYYYYYYY I MISSED YALL SM IM BACK i hope you’ll like this new series i’m working on chapter four for the eddie series i wanna get that done like immediately

[secret-diary-of-an-fa]

God of War (PS4) Review: Kratos’ Postal Grief Beard Versus Norse Mythology

Once upon a time, a man was born by the name of Cory Barlog and thus a coin was flipped. Would he become a videogame developer or would he take up guarding the Mines of Moria by pulling wizards into a precipice? Those really are the only two options with a name like Barlog. Anyway, apparently the Mines of Moria were a bit of a commute, so the world gained a talented Auteur developer with a unique vision for a game series about going postal in ancient Greece. Fast-foward a number of years specifically calculated to make you feel old and ancient Greece is a distant memory. Norse mythology is where all the cool kids hang out nowadays, and that’s where we’re going in today’s review.

As you might have guessed, I’ve just finished playing God of War (PS4), which is fun to say because it rhymes. It’s a very good game that should be a very bad game. When considering modern media artefacts, I’m often prompted to ask the question ‘what went so wrong?’, but this may be the first time I’ve had to ask the question ‘what went so right?’.

Let me explain: God of War 4 (I don’t care that they don’t put the number on the box art, that’s what it fucking is) makes a single, monumentally stupid creative decision that should ruin the entire enterprise, but doesn’t. And that creative decision was- wait for it- a stab at maturity.

The last time we saw Kratos- the world’s angriest mythical being- he was finishing his battle with the Greek gods in God of War 3. There was a moment in that game which, to me, typified what was so great about the series. If I recall the sequence of events correctly, you kill your way through an ocean of expendable goons and critters who are just trying to defend their home on Mount Olympus, dripping with blood and screaming furiously, then wander into the bedroom of one of ancient Greece’s sauciest goddesses and play a sex minigame that you win by fucking her so well that her handmaids orgasm too. Then you toddle outside again and, head cleared, solve an incredibly complex and cerebral puzzle involving non-Euclidean geometry and perspective manipulation that takes bloody ages. That, in a nutshell, was the core identity of the original God of War: a gleefully unrestrained and immature approach to sex and violence coupled with a grouchy willingness to make unsuspecting players feel like fucking idiots for no reason whatsoever. It was awesome. In contrast, God of War 4 picks up many, many years later with Kratos hiding out in Midgard of the Norse mythos and, for once, he hasn’t got a nark on and he’s not trying to stick his cock in someone with cartoonishly huge knockers. He’s just sad because his missus has passed away, leaving him and their young, impressionable son alone in a big, scary world full of trolls and ginger psychopaths. ‘Sad’ isn’t a completely new emotion for Kratos, but, up until this point, he was usually sad in a way that resulted in five hundred people getting their spines broken in a very colourful manner. Now he just wants to cremate the remains of the woman he loved and carry her ashes to the tallest peak in the nine realms so he can scatter her in accordance with her final wishes. And that’s what he does, with son- Atreus- in tow. It’s a twenty-plus hour game in which the objective is very simply to honour someone’s preferred funeral rites- nothing more, nothing less. It’s very modest by Kratos usual standards. Remember that his stated goal in the previous game was to punch freakin’ Zeus so hard that his face would go all concave and then repeatedly stamp on his corpse.

We never actually find out much about what Kratos was up to between games or how he met his wife. However, he’s a bit thiccer than in previous instalments and seems to have lost the use of the ‘jump’ button outside of context-sensitive environments. On that evidence, I choose to believe he’s been running a small but successful family restaurant called ‘Kratos’ Potatoes’ and enjoying it all a bit much. And why not? He beat up Zeus- if he just wants to create and sample homely yet exotic Greco-Norse fusion cuisine while growing a ridiculous straggly dad-beard, I say let him crack on. Actually, is it a ‘dad beard’ or is it a ‘grief beard’? I think they send them to videogame characters in the post whenever a loved one dies so they can signal to the world how sad they are through the medium of angsty facial hair. But where was? Oh yeah: cracking on with it.

Y’see this is where the plot comes in: the Norse gods won’t let Kratos crack on. They’re determined to make him bow before Odin- especially Baldur, who is way too invested in having a fight with Kratos for reasons that won’t become apparent until very late in the game. They just keep turning up and trying to break Kratos and his increasingly like-him-but-not-as-good-at-it son Atreus. This time around, our heroes commit heinous acts of violence to defend themselves, not enact revenge, as they travel, inexorably, to the top of a lonely mountain through landscapes of stunning natural beauty and many, many hostile creatures.

Of course, Kratos taking his son on a hiking holiday with added troll-murder and the occasional slap-fight with Norse mythology’s biggest killjoys doesn’t sound as interesting as the original games. After all, those were basically a production of Kill Bill in which the part of Bill was played by a guy with the power to summon lightning bolts and access to a seemingly unstoppable army of monsters and demigods. The ‘fun factor’ even seems to have taken another downgrade, in that Kratos no longer operates with the entertainingly demented passion of the insane: he has been tempered by time and love and managed to turn himself into a paragon of serious self control. So why is God of War 4 so bloody good? Partly, I suspect, the answer lies in the constantly evolving relationship between Kratos and Atreus, which gives the story an unbelievable amount of heart and always manages to feel very organic. Kratos never learned how to be a parent, and we essentially watch him do it in real time, forming a bond with his son that seems impossible at the start of the game and inevitable by the end. Partly, the games greatness lies in the characters you meet along the way, who range from bickering dwarves to talking, decapitated heads who prattle on like laid-back tour-guides. Partly, it’s in the beautiful, epic landscapes that make the journey across the Realms to the highest peak feel epic and significant, even while it is small and personal.

But a videogame is nothing without gameplay, and it is here that God of War 4 really shines. I loved the original God of War trilogy (especially the third instalment), but I rarely felt like I was playing as, y’know, a god of war. Kratos might not be an uncontrollable whirlwind of fury any more, but he feels truly powerful for the first time in the ongoing series. In fights, every punch feels like it could crack stone; every axe-throw like it could rend the sky; every chain-whip like it could legitimately start a forest-fire. Out of combat, Kratos moves around the environment with the stolid grace of a man who knows his movements are inevitable; irresistible; an imposition on the environment that can’t be denied. You climb and complete elaborate, complex traversals knowing that the satisfaction you feel isn’t just the satisfaction of finding the correct route or solving an obstacle, but the satisfaction of a being forcing his way through a landscape that resists him at every turn but cannot stop him. The puzzles- of which there are many- strike the perfect balance between conceptual trickiness and ease of execution to remind you that Kratos is smart as well as determined; that his mind is as indomitable as his body. Then there are the little touches involving heaving huge stone pillars and similar unnecessarily over-the-top efforts. In short, the gameplay is interwoven with who Kratos is- with what he is in way that seems completely unprecedented. Even the RPG elements feel  appropriate: they reflect the protagonist’s growing confidence in a skillet he hasn’t used in a long, long time.

Do I miss the uniquely juvenile, over the top identity of the old games? Absolutely: I’m a great fan of gratuitous gore and scantily clad women with big fuck-off swords. Usually, I find the desire for maturity in games to be a silly, pretentious trend that foolishly eschews anything obviously ‘fun’ for no reason other than courting the respect of people whose respect isn’t worth having. But I don’t think that’s what’s going on here- at least, not entirely. The developers of the God of War games are clearly artisans and craftsmen of extreme talent: their attention to detail is superb and their ability to weave a good tale from a simple premise is actually a little daunting for someone who considers himself a bloody good story-teller. It’s worth remembering that the de facto head of the studio, Barlog, became a father himself before commencing work on this game about a father learning to bond with his son. It feels personal and meant because it is. Other games might reach for superficially mature themes like family and redemption for altogether cynical reasons. God of War 4 does it because such thoughts are clearly much on the developer’s mind. I asked already ‘Do I miss the identity of the old games?’ and the answer is still yes. But that question deserves a follow-up: am I willing to embrace the identity of this new, quieter God of War anyway? And yes, yes I am.

But if we could have a few more women with enormous knockers and Kratos going properly batshit just once or twice in the next sequel, that would also be welcome. I mean, let’s try to strike a balance here, people, for pity’s sake.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Ransomware for coffee makers

My 2019 book RADICALIZED opened with a novella called Unauthorized Bread, a tale of self-determination versus technical oppression that starts with a Libyan refugee hacking her stupid smart-toaster, which locks her into buying proprietary bread.

https://arstechnica.com/gaming/2020/01/unauthorized-bread-a-near-future-tale-of-refugees-and-sinister-iot-appliances/

I wrote that story after watching the inexorable colonization of every kind of device - from implanted defibrillators to tractors - with computerized controllers that served a variety of purposes, many of them nakedly dystopian.

The existence of laws like Section 1201 of the DMCA really invites companies to make "smart" versions of their devices for the sole purpose of adding DRM to them, because DMCA 1201 makes it a felony to unlock DRM, even for perfectly legal purposes.

That's how John Deere uses DRM: to force farmers to use (and pay for) authorized repair personnel when their tractors break down; it's how Abbott Labs uses DRM, to force people with diabetes to use their own insulin pumps with their glucose monitors.

It's the inkjet business-model, but for everything from artificial pancreases to coffee-makers. And because DMCA 1201 is so badly* drafted, it also puts security researchers at risk.

*Assuming you're willing to believe this isn't what the law was supposed to do all along

Adding networked computers to everyday gadgets is a risky business: as with any human endeavor, software is prone to error. And as with any technical pursuit, the only way to reliably root out errors is through adversarial peer review.

That is, to have people who want you to fail go through your stuff looking for stupid mistakes they can mock you over.

It's not enough for you to go over your own work for errors. Anyone who's ever stared right at their own typo and not seen it knows this doesn't work.

Nor is it sufficient for your friends to look over your work - not only will they go easy on you, but sometimes your errors come from a shared set of faulty assumptions.

They CAN'T spot these errors: this is why no argument among Qanoners ever points out the most important fact, which is that the whole fucking thing is batshit.

The default for products is that ANYONE is allowed to point out their defects. If you buy a pencil and the tip breaks all the time and you do some analysis and discover that the manufacturer sucks at graphite, you can publish that analysis.

But DMCA 1201 prohibits this kind of disclosure if it means that you reveal flaws that might be used to disable the DRM. Security researchers get threatened by "smart device" companies all the time.

Just the spectre of the threat is enough to convince a lot of organizations' lawyers to advise researchers not to go public with this information.

That means that a defect that could crash your car (or your implanted pacemaker) only gets disclosed if the company that made it authorizes the disclosure.

This is seriously bad policy.

Companies add "smarts" to get DRM, because DRM lets them control how their customers use their products, and lets them shut down competitors who try to give control back to customers, and also silence critics who reveal the defects in their products.

DRM can be combined with terms of service, patents, trade secrets, binding arbitration, and other forms of "IP" to deliver near-perfect corporate control over competitors, customers and critics.

https://locusmag.com/2020/09/cory-doctorow-ip/

But it's worse than that, because software designed to exercise this kind of control is necessarily designed for maximum opacity: to hide what it does, how it does it, and how to turn it off.

This obfuscation means that when your device is compromised, malicious code can take advantage of the obscure-by-design nature of the device to run undetectably as it attacks you, your data, and your physical environment.

Malicious code can also leverage DRM's natural tamper-resistance to make it hard to remove malware once it has been detected. Once a device designed to control its owners has been compromised, the attacker gets to control the owner, too.

Which brings me to "Smarter," a "smart" $250 coffee maker that is remarkably insecure, allowing anyone on the same wifi network as the device to replace its firmware, as Martin Hron demonstrates in a recent proof-of-concept attack.

https://decoded.avast.io/martinhron/the-fresh-smell-of-ransomed-coffee/

Hron's attack hijacks the machine, causing it to "turn on the burner, dispense water, spin the bean grinder, and display a ransom message, all while beeping repeatedly."

https://arstechnica.com/information-technology/2020/09/how-a-hacker-turned-a-250-coffee-maker-into-ransom-machine/

As Dan Goodin points out,  Hron did all this in just one week, and quite likely could find more ways to attack the device. The defects Hron identified - like the failure to use encryption in the device's communications or firmware updates - are glaring, idiotic errors.

As is the decision to allow for unsigned firmware updates without any user intervention. This kind of design idiocy has been repeatedly identified in MANY kinds of devices.

Back in 2011, I watched Ang Cui silently update the OS of an HP printer by sending it a gimmicked PDF (HP's printers received new firmware via print-jobs, ingesting everything after a Postscript comment that said, "New firmware starts here").

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=njVv7J2azY822/21/20/

A decade later, there is no excuse for this kind of mistake. The fact that IoT vendors are making it tells you that the opacity and the power to punish critics is not a power that companies wield wisely - and that you shouldn't trust any IoT gadgets.

[ambitionsource]

hi can we get some zaley friendship headcanons whenever you're free? ☺️

im not the best at headcanons just bc of the way my brain functions but im gonna do my best for you, sunny my friend. let’s go zay and riley let’s go!

thrift shop buddies!! one of the most common ways that they hang out is definitely going thrifting. considering they arguably have the two most eclectic wardrobes on the show, this makes sense. esp i fully believe they’re the perfect people to thrift shop with where they encourage each other to try on everything, even if it seems outlandish (and sometimes even more in those moments). that’s the only way to really get some good finds! and i feel like, beyond S1, when they wear items for performances in the show that are clearly unique / seem thrifted, it’s more than 50% likely the other helped them pick it out at some point

on this note, i think that they both have really good senses of what looks good on the other bc they spend this time together, probably better than anyone else (yes, including their significant others. not that that’s hard, since both of their significant others have notoriously bland fashion). like even when theyre not out together i can totally imagine them seeing something and being like “oh this is so riley / zay” and getting it for each other. they know each other’s sizes and have like an ongoing swap credit system gfJSKHJDLFH

riley and zay usually run performance by the other person before they perform them for the class / at an audition. like they find a specific time (usually during breakout sessions during class) to get in front of the other person and run them through their concept + do a run-through for them. they just really appreciate the other’s perspective, especially since they tend to complement each other -- zay is able to identify places where riley could heighten things or add some flair or just like... assert her talent more lmao, whereas riley helps zay pull back on some of his more overwhelming instincts when necessary or find the moments to truly lean in emotionally rather than blowing us out of the water the whole time

if we could actually Watch the show, i guarantee 9/10 times when riley or zay is performing, we would cut to the other enjoying the performance. like theyre always bobbing their head along and truly feelin the other’s performances. excellent vibes luv!

i also think they harmonize well with each other, which is why its kind of a shame they dont do more performances together within the context of assignments (as for why, couldn’t tell you... it might just be a weird psychological thing of like i have These people i perform with when it matters and these who are just for fun... like maybe zay and riley tend to see each other as easygoing comfortable duet partners and thats why they try not to overdo putting pressure on it). but yeah they absolutely have days where they just hang out in one of the rehearsal studios and play around on the piano and try to find ways to harmonize on their favorite songs. this is some of the best singing riley ever does, bc its so low stakes and fun

i also think that honestly, zay really helps strengthen riley’s vocals over the time they’re friends -- especially early on. riley is someone with good raw talent but she’s never thought about honing it seriously prior to joining aaa, whereas zay has been on a career mindset since he was little. so he is good at teaching her like small technique things or helping her expand her range and she really values that esp bc hes so selfless about giving it, but it doesnt come off naggy or unnecessary like maya’s advice often does

sometimes it can be hard for them to find songs they both wanna sing though bc their music taste is so different. i think they have like three small categories where their favorites overlap -- select big names (sza, chloe x halle), jazz / old-time crooners (frank sinatra, nina simone, and the like), and select musical theater. but i think this is mainly on zay, bc he’s much more picky about music than riley who will give anything a listen without much nudging. as we know zay likes to pick on his friends’ music taste (like charlie and harry styles / 1d) and i don’t think riley would escape this affectionate teasing. they exchange song recs and riley gives him like her usual piano ballad-y sara bareilles tswift rachael yamagata energy and shes like oh yes, another piano ballad and hes like STOP!!! JUST LISTEEEENNNN GFSJKLHJFDSKLHKDLFH

that said though, they’re definitely go-to friends when it comes to like checking out a new local artist or coffeeshop open mic nights. this is probably a typical zay / riley / yindra outing

zay doesn’t spend a ton of time watching tv bc “he has better things to do with his time,” but riley and zay are definitely the type to watch a show together. like not always Together, but they’ll try to keep up with each other so that they can talk about it (and riley has to try really hard not to keep binging and get way ahead of zay). theyre good at this bc they can have really intense and opinionated conversations about it but in a way where its like safe and neither of them feel like theyre actually being judged / are stupid if they disagree (something thats not common for riley, and zay usually is trying to discuss media with super strong personalities who aren’t great at Debating).

in general, though, they tend to agree on favorite characters / relationships. for example, they both hate rachel berry -- which always gets maya and farkle extremely heated if they’re around. i can only imagine why...

they’re also definitely safe-space vent people for each other. they don’t use the privilege all that often bc i think both of them try to like keep their cool and not get hung up about things, but if they really just have to pop off about something they know they can go to the other person and they’ll actually Listen and keep it under wraps rather than either spilling it to everyone else and/or immediately trying to problem solve rather than just listening to the Emotions. and it’s helpful bc for the most part, their friends don’t actually really overlap that much, so they don’t really like harbor the emotions the other person unloads on them or let it affect their dynamics with other people? like riley can talk about dasher and zay can talk about yingel without it having any ripple consequences bc theyre different circles.

for example, i can totally see riley talking to zay about how she feels like -- at first -- asher doesn’t really like her and won’t really let her in and like he doesn’t want her to join the friend group (even tho that isn’t really true). like she can’t talk to dylan about it bc she’s not going to put him in that position and she’s not foolish enough to think that’s a good idea, she can’t talk to lucas about it bc he like doesn’t get stuff like that gFJKHGLFJSDLH and also he has such a set impression of asher it would be hard for him to understand it from her perspective. zay has none of that, so hes a good person to listen to her nerves about it.

the only times this gets kind of complicated / janky is in the midst of zay x charlie stuff where riley is kind of unintentionally (or, sometimes, intentionally) in the middle. like, zay trusts her not to go telling charlie what he says about him, but he knows they’re good friends too, and its an awkward position to put her in. but still, i think when zay is really hurt or frustrated he’ll snap sometimes and just vent out all his anger about charlie to riley in one foul swoop, and she’ll just absorb it like a sponge without judgment and then not bring it up again. but you can also see little ways where this puts pressure on their friendship, like how when he was drunk in 304 zay expressed resentment towards the fact that riley also talks to charlie and sometimes he feels like she puts him first, even though that isn’t true. it’s just..... a very very complicated (and interesting, if emotional) situation with that trio.

that being said, when things are Good, i think that zay feels comfortable talking about his significant others (including charlie) with riley. he doesn’t really get too Detailed about anything personal or anything, but they definitely discussed charlie in s2 in the small window of time where riley knew and zc wasn’t actively imploding LMAO. on the flip side, riley doesn’t really talk to zay about her relationships, but only bc her relationship is lucas GJFSKLJHLKDJHFLDSH. like anyone else she’d be like okay sure this is fine but she knows zay finds lucas annoying 65% of the time and talking about him in a romantic context grosses him out so she respects that LMAOOOO. hysterical

in general, if they’re gonna hang out, they usually go to either a local coffee shop they like (like svorskis) or each other’s houses. its kind of a relief to have a person they can just take anywhere and have around their parents with no trouble at all, considering both of them are used to having a boyfriend who cant be seen in their house (for different reasons). and theyre comfortable enough that like i think when they hang out at their houses, they just spread out in the living area of both bc theyre not hiding anything, its like very lowkey and comfortable

that being said, riley doesnt spend much time in zay’s usual studio at school. most people don’t, its a place zay now likes to be alone (and it feels weird with someone else being there who isnt charlie)

as for how they come off to their families, the babineauxs love riley. jada has met her a couple of times and thinks she’s super sweet + zay could afford to learn a thing or two from her like how to chill the fuck out (cue zay going shut the fuck up). donna is excited that zay has another friend who isn’t batshit intense about stuff like maya / farkle, she figures yindra has the diva best friend role covered and zay needs more friends like nigel and riley to ground him. she’s right about this.

cory likes zay, but he also does have some prejudices from the teaching perspective about how zay doesn’t pay attention in class half the time and blows off his assignments -- but this isn’t partially because cory isn’t a great teacher and his assignments suck. so the feeling is mutual, tho zay gets along better with cory in a neutral, polite sense than say, asher and dylan, where it’s like guerilla psychological warfare. topanga has no opinion about zay bc riley doesn’t introduce her friends to her (wisely).

they’re still very common lunch buddies. essentially when riley isn’t eating with the techies (which is only when lucas is there usually) or bothering lucas in the booth once a week, she’s with zay (which usually also means nigel, yindra, and farkle, though not always)

ultimately, i think that when someone asks riley who her best friend is, her mind will always jump to zay first. not even because theyre necessarily the closest at any given time, but because he really was her first life raft at aaa and he extended that kindness to her in a moment where she was so used to being brushed aside, talked over, ridiculed -- and you don’t forget that. it stays with you. so when she thinks about her Best Friend, speed round answer, he will always come to mind first. i think she greatly admires his skillful balance of confidence and compassion, his sarcastic sense of humor, the way he gets so passionate about dance and music and how these elements come together, and his inarguable kindness that is at his core and so fundamental to everything he does (even when his more known reputation is a bit more barbed and witty).

on the flip side, i think riley came into zay’s life at the exact moment he needed it. we know he felt isolated in s1, and even though i think he thinks of nigel and yindra as his first-to-mind best friends, riley was a breath of fresh air who allowed him to be himself with someone who wasnt going to judge him on past decisions or impressions. just like he gave her the chance to define herself in his eyes with his extension of company on that first day, she does the same for him by not making assumptions about him and learning who he is on their terms. i think she’s also just a really great, measured system of support -- she’s not busting his balls or keeping him in check like yindra and nigel do (except when its really needed, like 304), but she isn’t as in awe / romanticized with him like charlie. i think he appreciates that he can go to her for an honest perspective, but she’ll take the care to deliver that honesty in a gentle way. it’s like, he’s tough enough to take a hit, but sometimes its nice to know you have someone who will be kind with you even then.

that’s what is at the core of their friendship overall. kindness.

-- Maggie

[starwarsnonsense]

Top 10 Films of 2018 (So Far)

Since I quite like continuing old traditions, I wanted to do a post rounding up what I consider to be the ten best films of 2018 so far. This list includes a few films that came out in 2017 in the US, since they were only released here in the UK this year.

Have you seen any of the films I cover below? Have I piqued your interest in a title you might not have heard before? Let me know, and do share your favourites too!

1. Annihilation, dir. Alex Garland

This was my most anticipated film of the year, and my hype for it was more than rewarded. This is a marvellously rich and transporting science fiction film that isn’t afraid of taking the viewer to some very weird places. However, Annihilation doesn’t simply rely on its strangeness to succeed - it is also firmly rooted in its characters and themes, which has made it incredibly rewarding to return to. Natalie Portman is fantastic as Lena, and Annihilation is a brilliant showcase for her - Lena is a complex and frequently self-destructive character, riddled by guilt and regrets that shape the pulsating, luminescent world of the mysterious ‘Shimmer’ that she has to venture into. The Shimmer might seem like an environmental phenomenon at first, but it’s really more psychological, being a space that adapts according to the people who enter into it. This film overflows with fascinating and thought-provoking ideas, and it was entirely worth the hike I made over to Brooklyn to catch one of the final showings at the theatre (since Annihilation was denied a theatrical release in the UK, I made a point of seeing it while I was on holiday in New York). I think it will go down as one of the great science fiction films, and it belongs in the same conversations as 2001: A Space Odyssey and Solaris.

2. Beast, dir. Michael Pearce

This little British film - shot mostly on location in Jersey by a first-time director - was easily the biggest (and best) surprise I’ve had so far at the cinema this year. I literally had no idea this film existed until a day or so before I watched it, and that made the experience of viewing it even more wonderful. Moll (Jessie Buckley) is an isolated young woman who is stifled by her controlling family and quiet life on a remote island, as well as a secret sin that bubbles away underneath the surface. Her life is predictable - safe, repetitive and dull - until she meets Pascal, a mysterious local man who she finds she has an affinity with. However, there is a murderer haunting the island, taking the lives of young girls in the night. Who’s to blame, and what impact will the killings have on Moll and Pascal’s swiftly escalating romance? While that is a synopsis more than a review, I felt it necessary to explain the premise to try and compel you to seek this one out. Beast is raw, woozy and utterly absorbing - the love story between Moll and Pascal is one of the most passionate and gripping you’ll ever see on screen, and their chemistry is simply sensational. There’s a real gothic, fairy-tale edge to the story which appealed perfectly to my (admittedly rather niche) tastes. This is a real hidden treasure of a film - do yourself a favour and make it your mission to watch it.

3. Lady Bird, dir. Greta Gerwig

This film was so, so relatable, despite my not really having experienced an adolescence anything like ���Lady Bird’s”. While the details of her life are very different from mine, I think anyone can relate to the sweeping brushstrokes - the tensions that can arise between parents and children, the thirst for freedom and independence that builds the closer you get to the final days of school, and the feelings of love and loyalty that are always there even when they’re unspoken. Greta Gerwig captures all of this and so much more with marvellous delicacy, balancing little moments that add colour and spark with more serious scenes so deftly that it’s amazing to think that this is her first feature. Lady Bird is a very specific and very beautiful film, and it’s special precisely because it feels universal even as it feels small and personal to its director. 

4. Eighth Grade, dir. Bo Burnham

This is the perfect double bill with Lady Bird, and the people who have dubbed this film “Lady Bird Jr” are right on the money. Elsie Fisher has a real star turn as the heroine Kayla, who is a very special child - she’s kind, sensitive and thoughtful, which basically means she’s my kind of superhero. But even as she is a good and sweet person, she is also going through all of the trials you’d expect a 13 year old to be facing in 2018, as she wrestles with acne, confusing feelings about super-dreamy boys, and the escalating anxiety that comes with a comment-free Instagram post. Like Lady Bird, this film succeeds in being both very specific and highly universal - the only social media I had to deal with as a teen were MySpace and Bebo, and I found that seeing Kayla wrestle with a whole kaleidoscope of feeds, devices and platforms made her strong grip on her integrity as a  funny and deeply warm-hearted individual all the more remarkable. Bo Burnham, as with Gerwig, made a pretty incredible film here - in particular you should watch out for the father/daughter dynamic, which is my favourite part. Eighth Grade is funny and generous, and the perfect medicine if you’re feeling demoralised by the state of the world right now.

5. The Breadwinner, dir. Nora Twomey

The Breadwinner is a really lovely animated film telling the story of Parvana, a young girl living with her family under the Taliban. When her father is taken off to prison, Parvana sees no other choice but to dress as a boy to provide for her mother and siblings. But how long will her disguise last? The story here was what really gripped me - it’s very simple, in both the telling and the themes, but it is truly beautiful in that simplicity. The emotions are very raw, and this film goes to some shockingly dark places at times - while I think it can be watched with children as long as they are mature enough for some challenging themes and upsetting moments, it’s likely to speak most strongly to adult audiences with a fuller appreciation for the context in which the film is set. It’s a great and moving alternative to more mainstream animated efforts, and is well worth your time.

6. Phantom Thread, dir. Paul Thomas Anderson

This was a delightfully twisted film with an absorbingly complicated and twisty relationship at its centre. Vicky Krieps is an absolute marvel as Alma, and it’s wonderful to see how she battles to bring the fragile and austere designer  Reynolds Woodcock (Daniel Day-Lewis) to heel. It’s also a beautiful film with rather fabulous fashions - if you love couture, particularly from the ‘50s, this will be a real treat. I also appreciated the many allusions to classic cinema - there are strong shades of Hitchcock’s Rebecca, as well as the underrated David Lean film The Passionate Friends. Check this out if you like your romantic dramas weird and entirely unpredictable.

7. Revenge, dir. Coralie Fargeat

Revenge is angry, sun-soaked and batshit insane - and it is pretty great for all of those reasons. It follows Jennifer, the teenage mistress of a sleazy married man. After a horrifying assault Jennifer returns, phoenix-like, to wreak her revenge upon her attackers. This movie was very much inspired by exploitation flicks, with their penchant for showing scantily clad (and frequently bloody) women wielding shotguns to hunt down the brutes who did them wrong. However, first-time director Coralie Fargeat takes every one of those tropes and owns them, ramping up the blood and giving the action a propulsive energy that keeps you gripped even as you know exactly where things are going. The soundtrack here is also one to look out for - it’s all pulsating synths that do a great job of building the suspense and tension from the get-go.

8. Lean on Pete, dir. Andrew Haigh

This is a very painful film in many ways, but it’s only painful because it does such a great job of earning your emotional investment. The lead of this film is Charley, a sensitive and quiet teenage boy who becomes attached to an ailing race horse as he seeks to escape his troubled home-life. When he finds himself in crisis, Charley takes the horse and they head off on a journey across the American heartland. Charlie Plummer is extraordinary as the lead here - Charley is the kind of character that makes you want to reach through the screen so you can offer him a hug of reassurance and support. The photography of the American countryside is exquisite, and means this film really deserves to be seen on the big screen - the breadth of the landscape gives all of the emotional drama some (richly deserved, in my view) extra punch.

9. You Were Never Really Here, dir. Lynne Ramsay

This is a very weird film (you’re probably noticing a theme at this point) but it’s completely absorbing. It’s very much actor-led, and the film rests on the shoulders of Joaquin Phoenix’s gripping and unpredictable performance - in some scenes he’s muttering in deference to his mother like a modern-day Norman Bates, while in others he’s portrayed almost as a lost boy in an overgrown body, disorientated by his environment and engaging in acts of extreme violence as if in a sort of trance. The narrative is fuzzy and unfocused, but I didn’t find that mattered much since I was too busy following every evolution of Phoenix’s face.

10. Thoroughbreds, dir. Cory Finley

Olivia Cooke and Anya Taylor-Joy make fantastic foils to one another as two appallingly privileged teenagers whose obscene wealth is only matched by their resounding lack of morals. This is a film that plays with your loyalties, trying to wrong-foot you at every turn - it’s frequently difficult to figure out what’s genuine here, and while that did sometimes leave me feeling a bit emotionally detached that’s usually the point. This film is more of an intellectual puzzle than a lean, mean, emotion-extracting machine (see: Lean on Pete), and it succeeds brilliantly on that level. The simplicity of the story means the fun lies in picking apart lines and expressions, so go in prepared for some close viewing.

[s-leary]

Fascism Watch, January 11

(@cuffymeh tweet)

Trump

BBC News says there's audio and video of Trump's Russian misadventures, and more than one source.

Based on the dossier released yesterday, "James Comey’s intervention in the election last October — controversial at the time — looks completely indefensible now."

Lots going on in Trump's press conference. First off, he had it packed with staff applauding him. Not normal. Every two-part question let him dodge the more uncomfortable half.

Then he ranted about Buzzfeed's "fake news," said they would "suffer the consequences," immediately compared and conflated CNN with Buzzfeed, and refused to answer a CNN reporter's question. (CNN's statement afterward.)

(@LordRavenscraft tweet)

After the press conference, Sean Spicer told the reporter in question that he'd be thrown out if he continued to "harass" Trump.

(@davidfrum tweet)

For context, here's Trump Organization lawyer Michael Cohen threatening the Daily Beast last year for reporting Ivana Trump's claim that her then-husband raped her in a rage. (Trigger warning: the article discusses her claims in graphic detail.)

I will come after your Daily Beast and everybody else that you possibly know,” Cohen said. “So I’m warning you, tread very fucking lightly, because what I’m going to do to you is going to be fucking disgusting. You understand me?”

“You write a story that has Mr. Trump’s name in it, with the word ‘rape,’ and I’m going to mess your life up… for as long as you’re on this frickin’ planet… you’re going to have judgments against you, so much money, you’ll never know how to get out from underneath it,” he added.

Trump said today that he had no relationship with Russia. In this interview four years ago, he said, "I do have a relationship [with Putin], and I can tell you he's very interested in what we're doing here today."

Trump admitted during the press conference that Russia interfered in the election. He said the RNC wasn't hacked by Russia though they tried. It was.

Trump's lawyers were just awarded Russia Law Firm of the Year.

Trump says he's going to donate the profits from foreign governments' hotel stays to the US Treasury. If you're familiar with Hollywood accounting practices, you know how that's going to work.

Trump's plan to resolve his conflicts of interest does nothing of the sort. The Director of the Office of Government Ethics gave an extraordinary statement saying that Trump's plans to avoid conflicts of interest did not even come close to meeting the standard.

Elizabeth Warren has introduced a bill that would require the President of the United States to sell his or her assets before taking office.

Peter Thiel is still using some batshit logic to support Trump, in case you were wondering.

When I remark that President Obama had eight years without any ethical shadiness, Mr. Thiel flips it, noting: “But there’s a point where no corruption can be a bad thing. It can mean that things are too boring.”

Transition Team & Cabinet Appointees

We need some subheadings up in here...

Jeff Sessions, day 2

Sen. Cory Booker: "The arc of the universe does not just curve toward justice; we must bend it."

Rep. John Lewis: "We need someone as AG who's going to look out for all of us. Not just for some of us."

NAACP President Cornell Brooks: "The NAACP firmly believes that Senator Sessions is unfit to serve as attorney general."

(@ACLU tweet)

Rex Tillerson

(@RepMcGovern tweet)

On climate change: "I don’t see it as an imminent national security threat but perhaps others do." Like maybe the Department of Defense? And John Kerry, on Monday?

Tillerson contradicted Trump's positions on climate change.

Sen. Tim Kaine (D-Va.) asked Tillerson about reporting from the Los Angeles Times and Inside Climate News that Exxon Mobil had internally acknowledged climate science while publicly waging a campaign to undermine it. Tillerson demurred. "Since I'm no longer CEO of Exxon Mobil, I can't speak on their behalf," he said. "You'll have to ask them." Asked if he was refusing to answer or simply lacked the knowledge to do so, Tillerson quipped, "A little of both."

Exxon Mobil was ordered today to hand over documents related to a state investigation into whether it misled the public about the impact of fossil fuels on the climate.

Tillerson may have lied under oath when he said, “To my knowledge, Exxon never directly lobbied against sanctions.”

Tillerson refused to blame Putin for the murders of his political opponents, saying, "These things happen." He also refused to condemn the Philippine president's murderous war on drugs, despite being grilled on it by Marco Rubio, of all people.

"I'm not familiar with that program," he said about NSEERS.

Others

James Mattis canceled his hearing with the House Armed Services Committee scheduled for Thursday. House Representatives are not happy.

Unlike other nominees, Mattis needs a waiver approved by both the House and Senate before he can proceed to a confirmation vote. Following the cancellation news, House Minority Whip Steny Hoyer, D-Md., said Democrats in his chamber may oppose the waiver if Mattis doesn’t testify before their lawmakers to answer questions about his views on civilian control of the military.

Andrew Pudzer (labor secretary nominee) had his confirmation postponed to next month. Apparently his ex-wife once appeared on Oprah (?) in disguise (???) as a victim of domestic violence.

"Dina H. Powell, who runs many of Goldman Sachs’s philanthropic initiatives, will soon leave the company for a new role as adviser in the Trump White House" working with both Kushner and Ivanka Trump (who supposedly will have no official role).

[exmowitch]

My head hurts.

And my soul hurts.

And I wish there was a way to help others understand why I’m this way.

I wish there was a movie of my past — a narrative of my thoughts. I wish people knew that after my dad died and my mom moved us to Lucerne, I lost all my friends. My only friend was Jr — my moms live-in boyfriend’s son — who I let down because I was a kid and stupid and so he slit his throat. And when he came back home from the hospital, I let him down a second time by being scared of him. I wish people knew that when Jr and his dad left, I had no one but the Internet. I wanted to go to school. I wanted to meet people. But I spent the next 9 years or so in isolation. I lived on 10 acres. I barely left the house except to go to the doctors. My mom would find ANY excuse not to let me make friends or go see my friends in Cali. One time I was so mad I collapsed on the floor, fetal position, pulling out my own hair. I couldn’t make friends with people my own age but she did let me go out with Patrick who was 7 years older than me.

He asked me if I ever masturbated. I said I rather not answer. When he parked his car in the middle of the desert I remember being scared that he was going to rape me. I started shaking but I tried so hard to act calm. I wanted him to like me. He told me to close my eyes. I did. He tried touching my vagina through my pants and I remember stopping him embarrassed cause I had a pad on. I remember him being oblivious and telling me that he wanted to fuck my brains out. I wish people knew how he told everyone in that stupid small town that Marylou’s daughter (because that’s who I was. Never just Sara) was batshit crazy.

When I was 19 and we were parked in front of the liquor store, I met Jon. He asked me on a date. I hadn’t brushed my hair. We didn’t have running water at the time either. I was a mess.

3 months later I convince my mom to let me go on a date with him. I used the drug addict Nissi’s phone to call him because we didn’t have a phone. Hell I don’t even think we had electricity at that point. I remember how just like Patrick he asked me about sex. I told him I wanted to wait because I had made a purity vow to God.

I wish people knew that once my mom thought I was having sex with Jon — a woman who has nothing against pre-marital sex — she screamed at me that I was letting God down and if my dad was alive he’d be so disappointed in me right now — while she threw boxes at me, telling me I needed to stop talking to him or move out.

I wish people knew that I grabbed my seizure meds and my journal and started waking down the empty highway 18. Which even with a car took 30 minutes to get to civilization. It was raining. My mom drove past me speeding into town so she could tell Annabelle what happened. So they could theorize about how Jon must have manipulated me.

I hadn’t even had sex yet. I was still a virgin. I didn’t choose Jon in that moment. I chose myself.

One of the biker guys that runs the biker Christian church picked me up and let me call Jon.

I wish people knew that I once loved fearlessly. I loved Jon. I loved God so much I would sacrifice my life for him. I read biographies about Rachel Joy Scott and Cassie from Columbine. I strived to have a faith so strong like them.

I wish people knew how it feels that be a naive virgin and told that it’s not your fault you can’t jack him off — that only the girls at the massage parlor can. Or what it’s like to cry while he watches porn so you can successfully give him a hand job. Poorly made porn at that. Or how he just stops having sex with you. Even before you gain the weight. How when you move into your own place and you dress up in sexy lingerie he says no. So you go cut yourself. But not your stomach this time. You cut your vagina.

I wish people knew that I spent years hearing how I was fat and then incapable of doing things and that nobody would want me. When you say I was in an abusive relationship sometimes I think I need to say that I would starve myself for a week. Exercise 3 hours a day. Puke anything I ate. Just so he’d be “happy”. Or that if I didn’t have the house spotless, he’d ignore me for days. He didn’t yell because that didn’t hurt as bad as silence.

I wish people knew that once I had a child growing inside me — but no one was happy or supportive. Jons dad even asked if it would be “retarded” because of all the meds. My own mother even said it would be a blessing from God if I miscarried. The same mother who yelled at me about food stamps while I was miscarrying — passing blood clots bigger than my fists. Ending up in the ER for losing too much blood.

I wish people knew that my mom never says sorry. She just acts like nothing happened. Jon would say sorry though. I always forgave them both.

I wish people knew that I relive all these moments now.

And I wish people knew how little things. Like you telling me it makes you mad that I can’t believe you sent me somewhere else.

Emergency room. Cory found out I was cutting. He was mad. Like scary mad.

I thought it was because he cared.

But this was the same person taking sooooo much money from me and his nephew — always lying about the bills. The same person who knew I loved him. Like really fucking loved him. I did since day one. Yet he still had sex with me — not because he cared but he knew I’d do anything for him. I’d sacrifice my beliefs, body, and soul for him. “Sara can you come give me a hand?”

But when I was no longer needed for sex and I stopped being a source of money — he stopped caring.

Everyone who I believed that they cared — my mom, my sister, Jon, Cory, and the most goes on. They’ve all let me down.

They’ve all broke me.

But the sleeping pill is kicking in now.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Pluralistic: 07 Mar 2020 (audio from Canada Reads Kelowna, gig economy spreads Covid-19, Intel's security chip is insecure, Barnes and Noble gets a savior)

Today's links

Audio from last night's Canada Reads event in Kelowna: Thanks to Sarah Penton for being such a great interviewer!

Gig economy drivers won't get sick-pay if they have covid-19 symptoms: Your Instacart driver is being incentivized to handle your food through his fever-sweats.

Compromise threatens Intel's chip-within-a-chip: A bug in the Management Engine threatens five years' worth of Intel systems.

The savior of Waterstones will turn every B&N into an indie: James Daunt has opened 60 profitable stores in his career.

This day in history: 2015, 2019

Colophon: Recent publications, current writing projects, upcoming appearances, current reading

Audio from last night's Canada Reads event in Kelowna (permalink)

Last night I sat down for an interview and lively Q&A at the Kelowna Public Library with the CBC's Sarah Penton as part of the Canada Reads national book prize, for which my book Radicalized is a finalist. Courtney Dickson was kind enough to send me raw audio from the board and to give me permission to post it. It was a genuinely wonderful night, with great and thoughtful questions, and I'm really glad that I get to share it with you!

https://archive.org/download/canadareadskelownadoctorowpenton/Canada_Reads_Kelowna_Doctorow_Penton.mp3

Gig economy drivers won't get sick-pay if they have covid-19 symptoms (permalink)

The gig economy workers who deliver your @amazon packages are not entitled to sick pay if they think they have covid-19 and want to stay home, rather than delivering contaminated boxes to you.

https://onezero.medium.com/keep-your-car-clean-gig-companies-offer-little-support-during-coronavirus-outbreak-cf6c55cca8a8

It's not just Amazon Flex drivers who are being tacitly incentivized by rapacious, giant corporations to show up for work sick. Your Lyft and Instacart drivers are all being given a stark choice: work sick or go broke.

As Sarah Emerson speculates in her One Zero piece, this depraved indifference is likely an epiphenomenon of gig economy companies' urge to preserve the fiction that their workers are contractors, not employees. Contractors don't get sick leave, after all.

"[Amazon is ] basically threatening that I'll be out of work if I have any symptoms of being sick, coronavirus or not, but no protections and no offers for help in the event it happens" – Jeff Perry, Amazon Flex/Uber driver, Sacramento

Lyft's advice to drivers: "disinfect your car" and avoid passengers who appear sick.

As outrage over this policy went viral, Uber reversed its earlier stance and announced that it would offer up to 14 days of "compensation" for some drivers.

https://twitter.com/MikeIsaac/status/1236126626028507136

Compromise threatens Intel's chip-within-a-chip (permalink)

A new showstopper Intel bug compromises the Converged Security and Management Engine, the computer-within-a-computer that Intel uses for a variety of purposes, some beneficial (detecting malware), some terrible (shutting out free software).

https://blog.ptsecurity.com/2020/03/intelx86-root-of-trust-loss-of-trust.html

The Management Engine has long been controversial. It's designed to reach into your RAM and tinker with it in a way that, by design, the CPU can't detect or prevent. This is deliberate: it lets the management engine monitor and disrupt malware.

https://boingboing.net/2016/06/15/intel-x86-processors-ship-with.html

But of course, if your Management Engine itself is compromised, then – by design – the part of the computer that you control can neither monitor it, nor prevent it from doing malicious work. In 2017, a ghastly ME bug showed how risky this was.

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2017/05/intels-management-engine-security-hazard-and-users-need-way-disable-it

It's especially bad because ME security is, in part, security through obscurity: Intel barely documents ME function and doesn't permit outside auditing. To make everything worse, there's no way to fully disable it. So ME bugs keep on surfacing, each worse than the last. Here's 2018's:

https://press.f-secure.com/2018/01/12/intel-amt-security-issue-lets-attackers-bypass-login-credentials-in-corporate-laptops/

Which brings me to the new vuln: PT Security shows an early stage attack on the boot ROM, that allows for recovery of a master key that is used to generate all the other keys in the system. It's a deep bug that could potentially compromise all the downstream operations. It's only a partial attack (so far). The key needs to be decrypted to be usable, but the researchers say it's only a matter of time – and they point out that the key is shared across years' worth of Intel processors.

This compromise (when it comes) has profound implications for DRM, which is intrinsically brittle in that it's "break once, break everywhere." Once content is extracted from a DRM wrapper on a compromised system, it can be shared and played back on intact ones. DRM system designers try to address this with tactics like "renewability" and "selectable output control" that allows DRM systems to detect which systems they're running on and refuse to operate if they believe they might be compromised.

This is a thermonuclear option that could make DRM unviable forever. It means that if you had the misfortune to buy an Intel system during the five years that they were manufactured with this defect, you could lose the ability to play content you've already paid for.

Not because you hacked your system, but because you could. DRM is and always has been a timebomb, ticking down to the moment that execs in a distant boardroom decide to nerf or brick your property. The temptation to downgrade your customers' property to up your profits is irresistible.

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2016/09/what-hp-must-do-make-amends-its-self-destructing-printers

But customers don't like getting punished for "doing the right thing." If media companies cancel playback for purchased content on affected Intel systems, they won't be targeting pirates (who get their media DRM-free), but people who deliberately chose to pay.

"Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, we don't get fooled again." -GWB

Punishing legit customers to get at pirates is a surefire way to make more pirates.

"Might as well be hanged for a sheep as for a lamb."

The savior of Waterstones will turn every B&N into an indie (permalink)

A great hero of British bookselling is James Daunt, the founder of Daunt Books, whose flagship store is literally the most beautiful bookstore I've ever been to.

https://dauntbooks.co.uk/shops/marylebone/

Daunt took over Waterstones in 2011 and rescued it. The chain now runs as a string of indies, with no co-op promotion – instead, the booksellers in each shop choose which books they promote based on local taste. Corporate HQ chooses a book of the month and a book every year for chainwide promotion, but they do so on the basis of their enjoyment of the book – not because a publisher pays them for promo.

The new Waterstones stores are spectacular. There were always some great ones (the Waterstones in Bradford rivals the main Daunt books for beauty), but the vibe and experience of shopping at a post-Daunt Waterstones is a million times better than before. And new shops like the one in Tottenham Court Road really embody what a bookstore can be. The event I did there in 2017 with Laurie Penny was one of the best I've ever done in the UK.

https://www.waterstones.com/events/cory-doctorow-in-conversation-with-laurie-penny/london-tottenham-court-road

The good news is that Daunt is now running Barnes & Noble, which has been struggling and worse – pulling desperate moves like laying off all their most experienced booksellers to lower payroll costs, which is obviously a catastrophic mistake. And Daunt's public plan for BN – America's last major chain bookstore – is to replicate what he did with Waterstones. Let the stores run like indies, with local control by experienced booksellers who know and care about their customers' tastes.

https://www.bloomberg.com/news/features/2020-03-04/barnes-noble-wants-to-be-more-like-an-indie-bookseller

He's ending co-op promotion, featuring books that the booksellers choose, not books that publishers pay to promote. He's reversing the focus on non-bookstore SKUs (sunglasses, puzzles and scented candles) in favor of, you know…books. They're shrinking CDs and DVDs and expanding kids' books, laying the ground for a new generation of readers, and they're cleaning up, repainting, and generally repairing years of neglect that have given some of the stores the vibe of an abandoned K-Mart.

They're also opening new stores, targeting places that don't have any bookstores (as opposed to places where indie stores have kept the faith and continued to serve their communities). He's shooting for 1,500 stores nationwide. It's superb news for a nation where bookselling has been imperilled for decades. On every tour stop, I always insist that my media escort take me to every B&N in town to sign stock and meet the booksellers. As a recovering bookseller myself, it's one of the great pleasures of the tours. Bookstores are community hubs, and were key to my own literary upbringing. This is just delightful news.

(Image: RachelH_, CC BY-NC)

This day in history (permalink)

#5yrsago Improving the estimate of US police killings https://fivethirtyeight.com/features/a-new-estimate-of-killings-by-police-is-way-higher-and-still-too-low/

#1yrago Ajit Pai has been touting new broadband investment after he murdered Net Neutrality, but he's been relying on impossible data from a company called Barrierfree https://arstechnica.com/tech-policy/2019/03/ajit-pais-rosy-broadband-deployment-claim-may-be-based-on-gigantic-error/

#1yrago The EU hired a company that had been lobbying for the Copyright Directive to make a (completely batshit) video to sell the Copyright Directive https://twitter.com/Senficon/status/1103582295523553280?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

#1yrago The "Tragedy of the Commons" was invented by a white supremacist based on a false history, and it's toxic bullshit https://twitter.com/mmildenberger/status/1102604887223750657

#1yrago It's on: House Democrats introduce their promised Net Neutrality legislation https://www.cnet.com/news/democrats-introduce-save-the-internet-act-to-restore-net-neutrality/

Colophon (permalink)

Today's top sources: The Verge (https://www.theverge.com), Wired (https://wired.com), Slashdot (https://slashdot.org).

Hugo nominators! My story "Unauthorized Bread" is eligible in the Novella category and you can read it free on Ars Technica: https://arstechnica.com/gaming/2020/01/unauthorized-bread-a-near-future-tale-of-refugees-and-sinister-iot-appliances/

Upcoming appearances:

Museums and the Web: March 31-April 4 2020, Los Angeles. https://mw20.museweb.net/

LA Times Festival of Books: 18 April 2020, Los Angeles. https://events.latimes.com/festivalofbooks/

Currently writing: I'm rewriting a short story, "The Canadian Miracle," for MIT Tech Review. It's a story set in the world of my next novel, "The Lost Cause," a post-GND novel about truth and reconciliation. I'm also working on "Baby Twitter," a piece of design fiction also set in The Lost Cause's prehistory, for a British think-tank. I'm getting geared up to start work on the novel afterwards.

Currently reading: Just started Lauren Beukes's forthcoming Afterland: it's Y the Last Man plus plus, and two chapters in, it's amazeballs. Last month, I finished Andrea Bernstein's "American Oligarchs"; it's a magnificent history of the Kushner and Trump families, showing how they cheated, stole and lied their way into power. I'm getting really into Anna Weiner's memoir about tech, "Uncanny Valley." I just loaded Matt Stoller's "Goliath" onto my underwater MP3 player and I'm listening to it as I swim laps.

Latest podcast: Disasters Don't Have to End in Dystopias: https://craphound.com/podcast/2020/03/01/disasters-dont-have-to-end-in-dystopias/

Upcoming books: "Poesy the Monster Slayer" (Jul 2020), a picture book about monsters, bedtime, gender, and kicking ass. Pre-order here: https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781626723627?utm_source=socialmedia&utm_medium=socialpost&utm_term=na-poesycorypreorder&utm_content=na-preorder-buynow&utm_campaign=9781626723627

(we're having a launch for it in Burbank on July 11 at Dark Delicacies and you can get me AND Poesy to sign it and Dark Del will ship it to the monster kids in your life in time for the release date).

"Attack Surface": The third Little Brother book, Oct 20, 2020.

"Little Brother/Homeland": A reissue omnibus edition with a very special, s00per s33kr1t intro.