#legitimately i wish all providers would be so on their patients' sides that you high five at the end of an appointment

[pollen]

cried at my drs appt <3 and was told i'm brave for saying i need help. wish i felt brave LOL

[jingabitch]

To Love an Empress

SUMMARY: Despite the acrimonious beginning to your relationship, Yoongi is drawn to you.

PAIRING: emperor!yoongi x empress!reader

RATING: E

WARNINGS: smut | unprotected sex (they’re husband and wife and also this is a historical au so there are no condoms but be safe okay) | references to war | yoongi��s scar is discussed | yoongi kills a man (mentioned but not explicit) | secret admirer stuff

WORD COUNT: 9.8k

A/N: My final submission for the BTS Ghostie bingo, yay! This one fills the secret admirer tile. This fic is kind of based on Henry VII and Elizabeth of York’s early relationship, and inspired by The White Princess, so if some of the dialogue and scenes are similar, that’s why. 

Shoutout to my lovely betas @knjkitten and @yoongs-jeontae for helping me beta this! Banner by @jkeuphoriadreamland​ 💕 i’ve never had a banner on a fic before this is fun hehe

Min Yoongi was a hard man, and he knew it. He’d won his throne on the battlefield, running his sword through the old king and crowning himself right there on the blood-stained grass.

You knew it too, could never forget it when you looked at your husband. The scar on his face from an injury he’d sustained during the decisive battle for his crown; the memory of how coldly he’d treated you at the beginning; the baby growing inside you as a result of Yoongi’s insistence that you demonstrate your ability to provide him with heirs before he would marry you. As if he’d had a choice, when your bloodline was the cornerstone of his legitimacy.

After all the angry words and hostility between the two of you, he knew there was no chance you would forgive him. And yet, a part of him craved it. He saw the kindness you lavished on your ladies-in-waiting, the servants, and all the children running around the palace who were sons and daughters of the nobles and the army of servants working here. Was it so wrong of him to want just a little of that for himself? You were his wife, after all.

Yoongi was a warrior. He’d trained all his life to take control of the kingdom. War was all he knew.

Which made him, unfortunately, woefully inept when it came to wooing a lady, especially one so resistant to him. He’d relied on his looks before, but now that he had the scar on his face, it seemed that even that tool was no longer at his disposal. God knows you hated it.

With no one else to turn to, he asked his eunuch what he should do. At first, the portly man just blinked at him, confused. “She’s your wife, you don’t have to persuade her to warm your bed,” he pointed out.

Yoongi grimaced. “I know that,” he grumbled. “I want her to like me.”

Sambo snorted. “Should have thought about that before you made her ‘prove her fertility’ to you.”

Sulking, Yoongi got up and stormed away from his eunuch. Obviously, he knew that, and he wished that no one else did. It wasn’t like him to force a lady like that, but tensions had been running high at the time and he hadn’t trusted a woman from the house of L/n. You must have run to your lady-in-waiting and cried to her when it was over, because Sambo had gotten quite the shelling from her the next day.

Sambo, who’d quickly grown used to the antics of his master, just hurried along beside Yoongi. “Just give her something pretty,” he advised. “Women like that.”

Yoongi stopped short. Why hadn’t he thought of that? “That’s a great idea,” he enthused. “You’re useful for once, Sambo,” he praised his eunuch.

Sambo rolled his eyes to hide his pleased smile. “You’d think a grown man would know something like that,” he jibed. “Taking love advice from someone who can’t even perform must be a new low for you.”

“Whatever.” Yoongi waved off the insult. “I’ll get her a nice hairpin,” he decided. “But don’t tell her it’s from me.” He didn’t want you throwing it out in disgust.

“She’s obviously going to know,” Sambo pointed out. “There is no man in Joseon suicidal enough to woo the empress. That’s treason.”

Frowning, Yoongi snapped, “Just do it,” before stalking back into his room with a huff and shutting the door in Sambo’s face. The eunuch really didn’t need to rain on his parade like that, even if he was probably right. Hopefully you wouldn’t immediately come to the conclusion that it was him. It wasn’t just that he was afraid you’d throw out a gift from him—he wanted to make you smile. Not because you were bound to him and might as well exhibit some fondness towards your husband, but because he was really, truly capable of making you happy.

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Pregnancy had been difficult for you so far. Without your mother around, you were left to go through it by yourself. At least Ling, your personal servant-turned-lady-in-waiting, was here with you. You’d been together since you were a child and she was a young teen, and she was like a sister to you.

The morning sickness was starting to fade, thankfully, but you still got nauseous sometimes, so Ling suggested that you have your breakfast in the courtyard to enjoy some fresh air and sunshine while the cleaners dusted and polished your quarters.

When you finally got back to your room after being bullied by Ling into taking a little walk – exercise was good for the baby, she insisted – there was a hairpin lying on your table, next to the novel you’d been reading. Curiously, you knelt down to pick it up.

“What’s this?” you asked Ling, who was trailing a few steps behind you.

“It’s a hairpin, milady,” she responded somewhat cluelessly.

“Yes,” you said patiently, “but why is it here? I’ve never seen this before.” Looking more closely at it, you turned it over a few times in your hand. It truly was pretty, a delicate gold phoenix carved into the end of the pin, decorated with pink flowers and milky jade balls around the base of the phoenix.

Sitting down on the other side of the table, Ling pulled your hand holding the pin closer to her so she could examine it too. “I don’t know, but it’s so pretty,” she sighed. “Maybe you have a secret admirer,” she giggled.

“Yes, the pregnant empress has a secret admirer,” you said drolly. Everything about your existence, from the gilded cage you were trapped in, to your marriage to the most powerful man in Joseon, to the heir you were carrying in you, screamed that you were taken, owned by a man. And not just any man, of course, but the one whose wife was strictly, on pain of death, off-limits.

“Well, you never know,” Ling said lightly. “Just take it for what it is,” she advised. “Someone wants to make you happy!”

“All right,” you accepted skeptically, but you couldn’t quite stop the smile from stealing across your face. After living as a political pawn for so many years because of your family and giving up everything for the man who’d killed your uncle, it did feel nice to think that there was someone out there who liked you for you.

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You weren’t stupid, of course. You had considered that it was your husband who’d had the pin sent to you. It made sense, after all – he was the only man in the whole of Joseon who could do something like that. It didn’t take long for you to disabuse yourself of that notion, however. Yoongi hated you, considered you the snake in his midst. Taking a L/n bride after defeating the House of L/n was the last thing he’d wanted to do, and he’d made that abundantly clear when you met. Hell, even before that, when he’d sent a platoon to your residence in the countryside to retrieve you.

Your first interaction with the new emperor had gone woefully poorly, with cruel words said on both sides.

As angry and resentful as you were about being claimed as his wife, you weren’t in any mood to be supplicant to the new emperor. When they brought you to meet him, in an admittedly charming gazebo, you knelt without bowing or greeting him, refusing to even look straight at him.

“Are you just going to sulk, then?” he drawled, and you barely resisted the urge to strangle him with your bare hands.

“We’ve done nothing right; surely you aren’t insisting that we follow tradition now?” you replied, your light tone doing little to hide your displeasure. This was all wrong, you knew. Despite Ling hovering just out of earshot keeping a watchful eye on things, you knew that your reputation was at stake simply from meeting the emperor alone before you were married.

It was unusual for you to enter the palace knowing that you were to be the empress, too. Usually the empress dowager chose her son’s bride, based on a series of tests that demonstrated her suitability for the throne. But, you knew, you were already the best candidate, purely based on your bloodlines.

Yoongi leaned forward, steepling his fingers in front of him. “Of course not,” he said, and his low, dangerous voice caused your breath to catch as you jerked your head forward to look at him properly for the first time. You couldn’t help but gasp at the long scab slicing through his eye. Catching you staring at it, he smiled bitterly.

“Are you afraid of your fiancé?” he asked.

“Of course not,” you hissed. “Just horrified that I have to lie with a disfigured monster.”

You remembered the way he’d jerked back, as if scalded. Okay, so you weren’t blameless in the current state of affairs you found yourself in, this hateful sham of a marriage that neither of you enjoyed. Still, given the acrimonious relationship you had with your husband, it seemed less than likely that he was your secret admirer.

“Poor, pitiful L/n Y/n,” he responded coldly. “Why don’t we get it over with, then?”

“What?!” you gasped, your hand flying to your mouth.

He smiled at you coldly. “I will not repeat the mistakes of previous emperors,” he informed you, and your lips pursed in displeasure, recognizing his comment for the jibe that it was – most of the previous emperors in the history of the kingdom had been your ancestors. “Having no legitimate heir is a recipe for disaster.”

Despite your best attempts to avoid giving him the satisfaction of your reaction, you couldn’t hold back the blanch. Smirking in satisfaction at having gotten back at you for the cruel insult, he continued, “We will be wed only when you are pregnant.”

Really, after all was said and done, it was no wonder that you and your husband despised each other.

Still, maybe there was a part of you that wished the pin had come from him. It wasn’t that you were in love with Yoongi or something insipid like that, it was just… you were kind of lonely here in the palace, with hardly anyone you knew around. The only person you’d been allowed to bring with you was Ling, because she’d been your servant for so long.

It would be nice to feel, just once more in your life, like you had a friend around you.

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As your pregnancy progressed, you grew increasingly miserable and annoyed, and your secret admirer stepped up his efforts to cheer you up. From pretty flowers on your pillow to new books when you finished your existing ones, even pretty ribbons and once, a bag of a rare tea that was supposed to alleviate morning sickness, this mysterious individual was showing you more care than your own husband.

You rarely saw Yoongi these days, since he was usually busy in the throne hall, setting the country back to rights. Being a woman, you never got to attend the morning meetings and reading of the petitions, but from what you heard, Yoongi wasn’t the most competent politician. It frustrated you to no end – you were the daughter and niece of the past two emperors, had grown up learning about politics, history and economics, and yet your role was basically being a baby incubator while your inexperienced husband was led down all sorts of rabbit holes as the ministers tried to take advantage of the situation to fatten their own coffers.

The last straw came when you heard of a proposed tax increase for the peasants, purportedly to shore up the kingdom’s defenses. You knew Minister Su, who was in charge of defense, was greedy and corrupt, but very eloquent and had many supporters among the cabinet. Overcoming your own reluctance to speak to your husband directly, you stormed into his private quarters one evening, while he was relaxing with a drink.

“Get out,” you ordered his eunuch, who was kneeling by his side.

Sambo looked over at Yoongi, who nodded at him. Once the doors slid shut behind the eunuch, you knelt in front of your husband. Since you were about six months pregnant now, it was difficult for you to maneuver, but you managed. “I need to talk to you,” you told him.

“I gathered that,” he said dryly. “Could this not wait for a more appropriate audience?”

“No,” you rejected him flatly. “I heard that you’re considering a new tax on the peasants.”

“That’s none of your business.” He leaned back slightly and crossed his arms over his chest.

“You should reject the tax proposal, Your Grace,” you said quietly.

“I said, that’s none of your business,” he thundered, slamming his fist down on the table.

You winced, but continued, undeterred. “Minister Su does not have the best interests of the kingdom in mind, Your Grace. There was a bad harvest this year, and the people will not stand for a tax now, especially when they are already so tired of conflict.”

It seemed that bringing up the civil war that had just been fought between Yoongi and your uncle was a bad idea, as he looked even more furious. He sucked in a deep breath to yell at you, but you quickly continued, cutting him off before he could start.

“Your reign is still new, Your Grace, and the people are still unsure about you. Now is the time for generosity, so that they learn to love you.”

“Why does a L/n empress care about whether the people love me? You and your family hate me; you fought a war against me,” he scoffed, leaning back on his hands in a casual pose to show just how little he cared.

Bristling indignantly, you bit back, “You raised an army against my family! You are the usurper! Make no mistake of it, sir, I advise you not because of any attachment to you, but because I care about this kingdom.”

At that, some of the fire left him. “Everyone claims to care about the kingdom, but all they really care about is themselves. Do you think I don’t know that my ministers are watching me, waiting to take advantage? That people are plotting against me as we speak?”

You rolled your eyes. “That’s what it means to be the emperor. My father had the same thing, as did my uncle – from you.” Maybe goading him wasn’t the best thing to do right now, but you were pregnant, uncomfortable and irritated.

“Then how do I know that I can trust you?” he retorted, his frustration with the current situation bleeding through his voice.

You were going to murder this man, you swore. He wouldn’t need to wait for any plot coming from outside the palace walls. How could someone be capable enough to enact a coup against the emperor, and yet so frustratingly dim when it came to politics?

“Because my wagon is tied to yours, you idiot. I am your empress now before I am a L/n woman, and this child I carry inside me is a Min child. Do you think that if your rule fails, I can just go home, and all will be well for me? I will be executed together with you, and so will our child.”

That seemed to shut him up. “I’ll think about it,” he finally allowed grudgingly.

“Thank you,” you said, bowing with your forehead pressed to the back of your palms over the floor.

After you’d left, Yoongi thought about how that was the first time you’d bowed to him. It seemed there was much he didn’t know about his wife.

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The next afternoon, you heard from Ling that the tax on the peasants had been rejected, and a jeweled comb was delivered to your room. This particular gift came directly from Sambo, so you knew that it was from Yoongi, and you accepted it for the apology that it was.

Two weeks later, proof of Minister Su’s corruption and embezzlement came to light, and he was sent into exile. You might have felt slightly smug about it, since you’d hated Minister Su ever since your own father was the emperor, but mostly you felt a little bad for Yoongi, having to deal with something like that so soon after coming to power.

That same night, Yoongi invited you to have dinner with him. Well, it was more like an order, because you weren’t in any position to turn down the emperor, but Ling was excited nonetheless as she got you ready, helping you into your pretty jeogori and braiding your hair into an elaborate bun.

“I’m so happy for you,” she gushed as she stood in front of you, tying the jeogori. “This could be the start of a new relationship between the two of you!”

“You know I can’t get more pregnant, right?” you asked drolly, raising a brow. In fact, you’d pretty much expected him to leave you alone for the rest of the pregnancy and only call on you once you were recovered enough to perform your conjugal duties once more.

“Oh, hush,” she giggled. “I’m sure he wants to see how you’re doing. You are carrying his heir, after all.”

“Sure, that’s me,” you muttered. “The incubator.”

“Be nice,” she admonished. “You want him to like you, so that he’ll give you more privileges. When your son becomes emperor, then you can swan around all day like the crone.” Suffice it to say, neither of you liked your mother-in-law that much.

“I know,” you sighed. “I’m just uncomfortable all the time.” Entering your third trimester of pregnancy, you were having trouble standing around and kneeling on the ground? Impossible. You’d had a table and chair moved into your room so that you could sit comfortably, but as far as you knew, Yoongi still sat on the ground for most of the day.

Ling didn’t know about your late-night meeting with the emperor a few weeks prior, but you wondered if this dinner had something to do with that.

In Yoongi’s room, something similar was happening, as Sambo fussed over his master’s robes.

“Sambo, enough,” Yoongi sighed. “I don’t have to look nice; she’s already my wife.”

Sambo scoffed. “I said the same thing to you about sending her those gifts, but you insisted then too.”

Yoongi glared at his eunuch without saying anything, mostly because he had no argument against that. He knew he shouldn’t have trusted the man; he’d done nothing but tease him about his crush since he found out.

Thankfully, your arrival cut Sambo’s fussing short – yet another thing he had to be grateful to you for, he supposed. It stung a little that his wife apparently knew more about politics than he did, but you seemed to want to help him, so there was that.

“Your Grace,” you greeted, bowing slightly.

“Good evening,” he responded. “Please, sit,” he invited, gesturing towards the table he had brought into his room just for this. He remembered how much you’d struggled with kneeling on the ground, and then getting up, the last time you’d come to visit him, and thought that this would make it easier for you.

You’d seen the table as soon as you entered the room, of course – it was kind of hard to miss, since the room was mostly empty. Accepting his offer with a gracious smile, you sat yourself down and clasped your hands together demurely in your lap. Yoongi sat across from you and nodded at the servant standing in the corner, and that was the signal for the food to start coming in.

To be honest, you’d expected to see Yoongi’s favourite dishes being served tonight, since everything at your wedding banquet had been his favourite foods, so you were pleasantly surprised to note that it was the food you’d been repeatedly requesting due to your cravings instead.

When the servants left, closing the doors after them, Yoongi spoke. “Please eat.” He gestured at the spread, and you acquiesced, picking up your chopsticks.

“Thank you for the advice,” he started.

The food you were holding with your chopsticks fell back onto your bowl of rice as your hand went limp in shock. “Wh-what?” Of all the things he could have said, that was the one you’d been expecting the least. In all honesty, you’d expected something more like admonishment for interfering – and a lack of other punishment that would serve as tacit acknowledgement that you’d been right. It was how your father had been with your mother.

To be fair, it looked like it was costing him dearly to thank you. “You were right about the tax,” he ground out.

“Oh…” You recovered quickly and nodded, graciously accepting his thanks.

“But don’t make a habit of interfering,” he continued. Right… so there was a catch, after all.

You rolled your eyes. “Of course not,” you said sarcastically. “I’m just the brainless baby incubator, after all. It’s not like I grew up here, or have any knowledge and experience of palace politics, or anything of the sort.”

“You’re a woman—” he thundered, slamming his chopsticks down on the table.

“I am your empress,” you cut him off. “You insisted on marrying me precisely because of my bloodline, so I will not be sidelined, especially when we both know you could use all the help you can get!”

“Help that I can get from my advisors,” he huffed.

“One of your ministers was literally just exiled for corruption, so I don’t know why you want to throw in your lot with them, but sure.” You rolled your eyes. “Now, if that was all, I think I can take my meal in my own quarters tonight.”

Unfortunately, your dramatic exit was foiled by how much you struggled to get out of your seat. Biting back his smile at how cute you looked with your belly, Yoongi leapt to your aid – you were, after all, still his wife and carrying his child, so it was the least he could do.

You pinned him with a glare as he got up to assist you, but were left with no choice but to accept, holding on to his proffered arm and letting him basically hoist you up. “If you need anything…” he started, looking slightly contrite.

“Don’t worry, Your Grace,” you said. “I might be ‘just a woman’ –” your tone made it clear that you were mocking him, and he had the grace to look slightly chagrined – “but I am the empress, and I am carrying the heir to Joseon, so I get everything I ask for.”

“Good, that’s good…” he looked slightly shifty now, and you couldn’t help but feel a little bad for him. He’d been acting like a bit of a dick, but to be fair, you supposed, it wasn’t like his attitude was uncommon. With Ling’s reminder ringing in your ears, you took his hand and brought it to the swell of your belly. Your child was strong and healthy, and even through the layers of your clothes Yoongi could feel the flutter of kicks.

“Wow…” he looked entranced, and you couldn’t help but smile at him. Your child had been conceived in hatred and anger, but you were determined that you would not raise him in that environment. No, he would know only love. You were sure of it.

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Even though the dinner hadn’t gone according to plan, it was still somewhat of a shift in your relationship with your husband. Now when your paths crossed, he smiled at you instead of just walking by stonily.

The gifts from your secret admirer continued too, which made things kind of confusing for you. On the one hand, you were trying to make this thing with your husband work, if only so that your child could grow up in a positive environment. It was difficult enough growing up in the palace, something you were keenly aware of.

And yet, the continued attention from this unknown person was starting to tug at your heartstrings. You hardly knew who it was but being shown kindness without any ulterior motive was certainly enough for you to think fondly of your secret admirer. He didn’t send gifts that often, usually once every other week or so, but each one brought a smile to your face. Sometimes it was your favourite flower, or a snack from another part of the world, or a cute trinket from the market, but all of them were equally dear to you.

The fluttering feeling that you got in your chest when you saw that he’d left you another gift was somewhat tempered by the guilt over the whole situation. Were you allowed to enjoy this attention? You looked furtively around, slightly worried that someone was going to knock the Japanese cakes out of your hand.

“You know,” Sambo said, standing next to Yoongi, who was peering at you from his hidden position behind a wall, “Some of your subjects might find it unseemly for their emperor to spend his days spying on his wife.”

“Shut up,” Yoongi grumbled, although the words had no heat to them, given how distracted he currently was. He hoped you liked the cakes.

“If you want to spend time with her, you can just ask, you know,” Sambo pointed out. “Haven’t you two been getting along better lately?”

“She still gets annoyed at me every time,” he sighed. “I don’t want to upset her, she looks miserable enough as is.”

Sambo, watching you rub the small of your back as Ling fussed over you, had to agree. At eight months pregnant, you looked fit to pop. “Well, she’ll give birth soon, and then things will be better,” he said, patting the emperor on the back. “You really need to be more discreet, though. She can tell it’s you from a mile away.”

Yoongi looked over at Sambo and scowled. “No way,” he denied.

“Really? So there are lots of men walking around decked out in the emperor’s robes, and have blonde hair, then?”

“Fine.” Yoongi sulked. “Let’s go, then.”

“You know you have a bunch of petitions to review, right?”

“I get it.”

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To put it mildly, labour sucked. But at the end of it, you had a beautiful little boy, handed to you wrapped in a blanket. “Wow,” you marveled at your son, stroking his cheek with your thumb as you cuddled him close. Your own dear boy. Cradling him in your arms, it hardly mattered that he was a Min, that he represented the end of your house on the throne. Your son was all that mattered now.

Looking up, you saw Yoongi hovering by the entrance to the room, looking on hesitantly, as if he wasn’t sure if he would be welcome. The idea was laughable to you – he was the emperor, there was nowhere he couldn’t go. You remembered your own father striding around as if he owned the place, because he did. No matter how fond he’d been of your mother, it had always been clear in the way he acted that he knew he was the boss. At best, she was a favoured subordinate.

You could see some of that attitude in Yoongi, and you accepted it – that was how men were, after all. But sometimes, peeking through the haughty exterior, you caught glimpses of someone kind and considerate. Someone you could grow fond of.

“Come in and meet him,” you invited.

As he came closer, he breathed, “It’s a boy?” His voice was slightly choked.

Smiling, you nodded. He knelt next to you and peered into the blanket, staring down at his son for the first time. Then he turned his head slightly to regard you. “You look beautiful,” he complimented, and you looked up, surprised. You didn’t know exactly what you looked like, but you were sure you were a mess after labour and childbirth. Your hair was a matted, sweaty mess, and you were dressed simply, in a cotton underdress.

Still, from the way he watched you holding the baby, you could have been dressed in the most beautiful of clothes and jewels.

“Do you want to hold him?” you asked, and his eyes lit up.

“Can I?” he asked. You nodded, passing the little bundle over to him.

“My son,” he said softly, leaning his head down to get closer to the baby. “Min Man-bok.” The name had been chosen by the astrologers, who said it would bring him great fortune throughout his life. You hoped it was true. This boy would grow up to be the emperor that united the warring houses of Min and L/n, and finally put an end to all the senseless violence that had stolen the lives of your brothers, and later, your uncle.

As you watched them – your husband and your son – you felt a sense of contentment like you’d never known before. In that moment, it hardly mattered that they were the emperor and the crown prince, that the weight of the kingdom rested upon your baby’s tiny shoulders. For that brief window, they could just be… yours.

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The birth of your son changed everything. The gifts that had once been so dear to you because they meant that someone was out there thinking of you now seemed almost uncomfortable, like unwanted attention that threatened the security of your family. You knew it was ridiculous – after all, the giver of said gifts had been quietly doing so for months, never trying to push his luck or making his identity known to you.

Still, though, as you became closer to your husband, that nagging feeling that you were doing something wrong wouldn’t leave you. Thankfully, the gifts seemed to dry up, and you wondered if your anonymous admirer was really that astute. Whoever he was, you owed him your gratitude. He’d known when to start, and, it seemed, just when to stop.

In actuality, Yoongi had just been too busy to think about sending the gifts. Having a son took up much of the time that he wasn’t already spending governing, which had also increased in the past month or so. There was so much entertaining to do, as the lords and ladies of the land came to express their fealty to the crown prince, and as Yoongi made ever more ambitious diplomatic alliances with other kingdoms now that his reign was secured with the birth of his son.

In whatever spare time he had, he was constantly hanging around you and Man-bok, fawning over his son and enjoying your company. Despite your confinement, you thwarted the rules by sitting right outside your door to get a little sun and fresh air, often holding your son while you did so. It was a beautiful sight, one he wanted to continue to drink in for the rest of his days.

It was no surprise, therefore, that his priority wasn’t sending cute gifts to you anonymously, since he was always around you. When your confinement finally ended, he threw a little two-person party, ordering the kitchen to make all of the food you’d been craving since you were pregnant that had been off-limits for you, including your old favourites. He even managed to get the cook from your country estate into the palace, to make your childhood favourite.

“Thank you for dinner,” you said at the end of it, resisting the urge to lean back on your hands to give your stomach more space.

“Thank you,” he countered. “I am forever in your debt.”

“It was my duty,” you demurred. It was the truth – you’d always known that it would be your job to bring heirs to your husband.

“Still.” There was a beat of silence as a servant rushed to fill your cups with rice wine. He lifted his cup to toast you. “You have brought new hope to this kingdom. An emperor who will unite the houses of Min and L/n.”

“I thought our marriage accomplished that,” you giggled. You might have had too much alcohol tonight, after almost a year of not having any.

“You really think so?” he breathed, looking at you like you’d hung the stars in the sky and told him they were for him.

“Yoongi…” It was the first time you’d called him by name. In your defense, the open, vulnerable way he was looking at you made it difficult to remember that he was a warrior king, despite the scar on his face that attested to his experience fighting a war. “Of course, Your Grace.” You recovered from your slip quickly, and you flushed slightly, hoping he wouldn’t remember it.

Of course, that was a doomed wish. He’d committed it to memory, the sound of your precious voice speaking his name, and in that almost fond and tender tone, too. He felt his heart squeeze in his chest, and knew he was done for.

When he left your quarters that night after dinner, he barely waited till he’d descended the steps to pump his fist in the air. That was the most successful interaction you’d had with him to date, not counting when Man-bok was born, of course, since he was pretty sure you were so exhausted you couldn’t snipe at him if you tried then.

“Your Grace!” Sambo, walking a step behind him, sounded scandalized.

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“So, tonight went well,” Ling prompted as she helped you get ready for bed. You sat in front of her, letting her take the pins out of your hair and sighing in relief. Your updo was often twisted so tightly it pulled on your scalp, and the giant metal pins hurt, to say the least.

“How would you know that?” you murmured, trying to keep a straight face. Ling would never let you live this down if you confessed to her just how much you enjoyed the company of your husband these days. Not after you’d screamed so loudly and for so long about how you hated him and didn’t ever want him to touch you.

In your defense, he’d really been a nightmare to live with at the beginning, cold and angry, mistrustful of your intentions. Not that he’d had any reason to trust you based on the way you’d treated him. You still cringed to think of the angry, cruel words that had been exchanged between you. You’d mocked the scar on his face from your uncle, the previous emperor, and he’d taken pleasure in describing the way he ran his sword through him in exchange. You’d laughed at his tenuous grip on the throne, and he’d—

Well. Suffice it to say, both of you had moved past that.

Ling reached over you to shift the mirror so that you could see your own face in it. “You’ve always had a shitty poker face, milady,” she explained. “You can’t hide anything from me.”

You sighed. “I knew I should have gotten different servants when I came,” you responded without any heat.

“Please, as if you have the patience to teach someone else just how you like your morning routine,” Ling scoffed, recognizing your teasing for what it was. Finally removing the last pin from your hair, she smoothed her hands over it as it tumbled down your back, then picked up the brush to comb through it.

“You’re right. I guess I’m stuck with you,” you responded, tilting the mirror slightly so you could look at Ling in it.

“Whatever. Stop trying to change the subject,” Ling ordered. “What happened tonight? You looked so happy when he left, and he could barely hold back his grin.”

You rolled your eyes. “Not that,” you said defensively. “I’m barely even recovered from giving birth; I’m hardly ready for more.”

“All right,” Ling conceded, though you could tell from her tone that she was still amused. Belatedly, you realised that your defense hadn’t been about how you felt about your husband at all. “Have a good night, milady.”

---------------------------------

Having a son changed everything. You knew, perhaps better than anyone else, save your brothers, the dangers that came with being an heir to the throne, and it worried you to pieces that his life would never be safe.

You’d told your husband before, completely unsympathetically, that this was what being the king would entail. Having people after you, coveting what was yours, always lurking in the shadows and waiting for a time to strike… the idea that your own son would be subject to the travails of being the emperor made you want to clutch him to your breast and never let him go.

Yoongi caught you in one of your moods one afternoon, sitting in the gazebo in your private gardens, leaning against a pillar as you rested your son against your thighs. You cooed at him as you played with his hands and feet, smiling as he laughed back at you, but the furrow of your brow gave you away.

“What are you thinking about?” he asked, sitting down next to you. It was rare for you two to be alone – Ling and Sambo were usually hanging around, and Man-bok’s nanny and wet nurse weren’t too far from the baby either. But you’d wanted a little time to bond with your son alone, so they were hanging out by the pond a small distance away. Ling had become friends with the nanny and nurse, and they were more than happy to have a little free time to gossip.

You picked up your infant son’s hand and used it to wave at him. “Hello, daddy,” you said in a high-pitched baby voice, and Yoongi smiled tenderly at the both of you, although you were still looking down at Man-bok and didn’t see it.

“Hello, my son,” he replied, leaning in to pick Man-bok up. You straightened his clothes a little as Yoongi stood the baby up on his lap, bouncing him a little. Yoongi was truly a remarkably involved father, especially for being the emperor.

“Yoongi, I’m worried about Man-bok,” you confessed in a small voice, looking up at your husband for the first time. Even the scar on his face now was a reminder of how difficult it was to be the emperor – Yoongi had been lucky to escape with just a disfigured face. He hadn’t even lost his vision.

“What’s wrong with him?” Yoongi asked with a frown, turning the boy slightly in his grasp to inspect him. He looked healthy enough, but you never knew with babies, really.

“Nothing,” you rushed to reassure him. “It’s just that being the crown prince is dangerous, and being the emperor is even worse.” Your voice choked up as you explained. Saying the words out loud made them more real somehow, and you almost wished you hadn’t.

“Y/n…” Yoongi looked over at you, shifting Man-bok so that he was being held more securely against him. “Is this about your uncle?” At the beginning, he’d never thought much about the fact that you were related to the previous emperors, but now the fact that he’d basically murdered your uncle in cold blood hung over his head like the sword of Damocles.

“Y/n… I’m sorry.” The words stuck in his craw, but he forced himself to say them anyway. It was a lie, but if it was what you needed to feel better…

Instead of accepting his apology, you made a rude noise. “For what?” you asked.

“For your uncle…?” Confused now, Yoongi cocked his head at you and furrowed his brow.

“Why would you need to apologize? Of course you raised an army to take the throne. It was his fault for leaving potential heirs alive.” The nonchalant way you expressed that sentiment gave him pause. He’d never taken you for someone so cavalier about violence and death. “He did the same thing to my brothers.”

The way your lips tightened as you said it clued him in to the fact that that was what was really bothering you. Of course, your brothers. The two princes that your uncle had had imprisoned and then murdered to secure his rule. When your father had died, your uncle had been declared regent since the crown prince wasn’t old enough to rule, and he’d wasted no time cementing his own authority instead.

“Y/n…” You avoided his gaze, instead reaching for Man-bok. He relinquished the boy to you and you hugged him close, needing to feel your son’s warm, healthy body pressed against you. “I promise you,” he continued, his voice full of conviction. “Nothing will ever happen to our son. Not so long as I live and breathe.” Ducking in, he pressed a tender kiss to the top of Man-bok’s head.

“Really?” The faint hope in your voice made his heart clench. In all the time he’d spent alternately admiring your kindness and cursing your stubborn, know-it-all streak, he’d never seen the vulnerability that you were showing him now. In hindsight, it was silly that he hadn’t realized this earlier, but of course you were scarred from the civil conflict that had been raging. Your family was in the thick of it all, and as much as the men and women involved were royalty, they were also your blood relatives. Really, it was a wonder you’d turned out as normal as you had.

“I swear on my life.” He’d never meant anything as much as he did now.

“Thank you, Yoongi.” Holding Man-bok with one hand, you reached for him with the other, sliding your arm along his shoulder to pull him close for a kiss. It was sweet and tender, a wonderful, perfectly fitting first kiss. His eyes fluttered shut as you drew close, wanting to savour the moment for as long as he could. Your lips were soft and you smelled like roses, just like the perfume he’d given you in secret.

---------------------------------

It was highly unusual for the emperor to share a bed with his empress. Intimacy was carefully planned based on auspicious dates, and after the deed was done, you both got dressed and went your separate ways. You knew that, and yet you slipped into his room that night, after Man-bok’s 100-day celebration.

You’d gotten mostly undressed after the banquet ended, grateful to be out of your restrictive clothing. Man-bok was sleeping, of course, with his nanny, and you’d dismissed Ling too after she helped you out of the empress robes. Dressed in just your pajamas, you pulled a warm shawl over your shoulders and left your quarters. You just had so much pent-up energy from earlier, and you needed to talk to someone about it.

“Hey,” you said softly, slipping in through the doors just as Sambo was leaving. He gave you a sideways glance, but you ignored it.

“Hey,” Yoongi greeted, smiling at you. He too was in his pajamas, already in bed, the covers pooling around his waist as he sat up. “What’s up?”

“Nothing, I just…” You swallowed, feeling a little silly now. This could have waited till tomorrow. “I guess I didn’t want the night to be over,” you confessed. It had been so much fun tonight, getting to meet and talk to everyone. Your sisters and old friends had come to the palace, and Man-bok had been so cute in his little ceremonial robes.

“I get it,” he said. “Come sit.”

You came closer, sliding the shawl off your shoulders, and knelt next to his futon. Illuminated in the soft light of the lamp nearby, the long blonde hair he’d left to tumble over his shoulders seemed to glow softly. Your own hair had been hastily put back in a bun – a lady never left her rooms with her hair down, after all. It was nowhere near as intricate as anything Ling could do for you, but it sufficed.

“Did you have a good time tonight?” he asked with a soft smile.

“You know I did,” you giggled, leaning closer.

“Yes, I saw you having a grand old time with your sisters,” he teased, fondness evident in his voice. Ever since the kiss you’d shared, your relationship had been evolving. Yoongi didn’t know if you would ever forgive him for what he’d done to your family – despite your dismissive attitude towards your uncle – but he was content with this. You letting your guard down around him, seeking him out and enjoying his company… it was more than he’d allowed himself to hope for.

“Oh, I haven’t seen them in over a year,” you enthused. “It was so nice to see them all again! Thank you for inviting them,” you said, more quietly now. “I know it wasn’t an easy decision, inviting the L/n clan tonight.” Despite everything, you knew he was still insecure about his rule.

“You’re welcome.” He smiled at you, then noticed for the first time the soft light glinting off the hairpin you were wearing, the one he’d bought for you. “Oh, you’re wearing the pin! I was right, it does look good on you,” he complimented.

“You— what?” Your voice was shaky, your eyes wide as you reached up to wrap your fingers around the pin, and Yoongi realized that he’d fucked up.

Just to be sure that it was the right one, you pulled it from your hair, causing the long locks to tumble over your shoulders. Brushing it aside impatiently, you inspected the pin. Sure enough, it was the same one that you’d received almost a year ago, and you’d never found out who sent it to you.

“It was you?” The words trembled, fragile in the darkness of the room, barely there, like a wisp of smoke.

“I… yes.” Yoongi was watching you carefully, his hands held out placatingly in front of him.

“But why?” It felt like your mind was shutting down, unable to reconcile this new information. Back when you’d gotten this pin, you could barely stand to be in the same room as your husband. You hadn’t even started being friendly until after Man-bok was born. To know that he hadn’t felt the same way, that he’d been quietly watching you, thinking of you…

“I just wanted to make you smile,” he said honestly with a half shrug.

“Yoongi…” Your voice was choked up, and he was starting to panic now, not quite sure what he’d done wrong. Even if you hadn’t welcomed his advances, he hadn’t overstepped, right? All he’d wanted to do was make you less miserable, and now he was thinking that he would have been better off leaving you alone altogether.

“Is… is that okay?” The words were hesitant, Yoongi ducking slightly to look at your face.

Sniffling, you nodded, swiping at your tears impatiently so you could look at him clearly. In the dim, flickering light, Yoongi’s face was the most beautiful, dear thing you’d ever laid eyes on. Your eyes roamed his face, seeing him as if for the first time. He was so handsome, your husband, your emperor.

“Are you disappointed? Is that why you’re crying?” Worry crinkled Yoongi’s brow. He knew he wasn’t the greatest catch. Throne aside, his hair was a strange colour and the scar running dramatically across his face marred him permanently. He was short and quiet, awkward, caustic… The insecurities came roaring to the forefront.

“No,” you denied, grabbing his hands and bringing them to your chest. You shuffled closer yet, so that your forehead rested against his. “I’m not disappointed at all. Yoongi…” you breathed, your eyes fluttering shut as you brushed your lips across his softly. “Thank you.” For caring about you even when you’d cursed him. For being by your side, even when you hadn’t known it. Just for being him.

Yoongi’s hand slipped from your grasp before reaching up to cup your face, his thumb running across your cheekbone tenderly. “You’re welcome.” He understood what you meant and responded in kind. “You give me more than you know, Y/n.”

The urge to give him more was rising within you. Holding onto his shoulders for balance, you swung one leg over his lap, so that you were straddling him. His hands went to your waist, supporting you and tugging you closer. “Y/n,” he groaned. “What do you want from me?”

Your response was unequivocal. “Everything.”

That was all the permission he needed. Yoongi’s hand travelled up from your waist to the back of your head, bringing you in for a fiery kiss. He poured all of the longing of the past months into it, his lips moving over yours with urgency. Try as you might to keep up, you couldn’t. You’d only had sex with him to conceive before, and it had always been a hasty, dispassionate affair. You didn’t know what to do with your hands or your mouth, your palms resting lightly on his shoulders. You liked this, enjoyed the way his tongue slid against yours, but your body was rigid with uncertainty.

“Y/n, are you okay?” Yoongi broke away from the torrid kiss to ask. His hand on your waist rubbed you soothingly as he leaned back to take a good look at you.

“Uh, yeah, I…” You stammered. “This isn’t like before,” you finally said. All you knew of sex was what he’d shown you before, quick thrusts with his hands holding onto your thighs while you clutched the bedsheets and tried not to let your pain and discomfort show.

It was vague, but Yoongi knew what you meant, and he flushed with shame. “I’m going to make it up to you, okay?” he said, wrapping his arms around you and turning so that you were lowered onto the futon. His forearms bracketed your body, holding his weight up as he lowered his head for another kiss. “I’m gonna make you feel so good,” he slurred against your lips, one hand reaching for the tie of your shirt.

“Yoongi,” you breathed, your hands sliding around his waist as you held on to his clothes, tugging him closer to you. You felt the hard press of his erection against your belly, and were filled with curiosity. Before, you’d never really wanted to get close to it, and he’d basically just shoved it into you with little fanfare. You’d never even gotten a good look before.

Undoing the ties to his trousers, you slid your hand in, running your fingers hesitantly along his cock.

“Fuck,” he breathed, and you jerked your hand back as if scalded.

“I’m sorry,” you started to apologize, and he backtracked immediately.

“No, no, you didn’t do anything wrong,” he reassured you, nosing at your chin before he trailed kisses down your neck. You sighed and tilted your head, giving him more room.

“Really?” you asked.

“Yes, really,” he said, sucking a little mark right over your collarbone. Emboldened now, you tried again, this time wrapping your hand softly around the shaft. His skin was soft here, and so smooth, but you could feel the steely hardness underneath.

“Ah, you’re so good,” he praised, and you started stroking him lightly, carefully.

“Allow me,” he breathed as he slid his hand down your body, groaning as he found the wetness between your legs. “So perfect for me,” he sighed as he started stroking your clit softly, watching you for your reaction.

You moaned luxuriantly, throwing your head back as your hips rocked. You’d never felt anything like this before, and if this was what sex could be, it was no wonder everyone seemed to like it so much. As you grew distracted with the pleasure suffusing your being, your hand slowed down and then stopped on his erection, but he didn’t mind. Coaxing the sighs and moans from you was more than enough for him.

“I’m going to put my finger in now,” he warned you, and your eyes opened in confusion.

“Why?” you wondered.

“I have to stretch you out, love, so you can take me easily,” he answered, leaning down to kiss you.

“You didn’t before,” you pointed out, and he grimaced.

“Please forget everything I did before,” he groaned, sounding very much like he was in pain. “None of it was right, and I want to show you how much I love you.”

“You—what?” That was new. You hadn’t expected it so soon, if ever.

“Oh, fuck.” He reared back at that and clapped his hands over his mouth in horror. “I didn’t mean to say that! Please ignore it,” he pleaded. Honestly, he wouldn’t blame you if you put your clothes back on and ran out of there right now. What an embarrassing lapse of decorum.

To his surprise, you did none of that, instead wrapping your hands around his wrists and tugging them away from his face. “Did you mean it?”

“Y/n—” he whined, his face hot.

“Yoongi, please,” you said, and the tenderness in your voice gave him courage.

“Yes,” he admitted. “But I don’t expect you to say it back! I know it’s too soon, and you might never feel that way about me, and that’s okay, really, I—”

You cut him off by tugging him close to you and kissing him. “I love you too,” you murmured softly when you separated.

“Really?” His voice was small, and you smiled as you nodded.

“Fuck, I’m going to make it all better,” he swore, his voice deepening into a growl towards the end. With a renewed sense of purpose, he pushed you back into the futon. His hands were everywhere as they stripped you of your clothing, and you felt a little exposed lying there bare for him to see. You were more than aware that your body hadn’t quite bounced back from pregnancy, and he’d never seen you completely nude anyway.

The sheer reverence reflected in his gaze did much to boost your confidence, though. “You’re so gorgeous,” he rasped, bending to tug a nipple into his mouth. You cried out, your back arching as he laved at it, his hand returning to its previous mission of getting you ready to take him. His thumb rolled over your clit gently as he slid his fingers into you, first one, then two, pumping slowly to loosen you up. The wet, lewd sound soon echoed through the room.

“Yoongi,” you breathed to get his attention, pushing his shirt over his shoulders. The tie had already come undone and the front was hanging rather uselessly by his sides, and it wasn’t difficult to remove it. Yoongi got the message, though, stripping himself off with far less fanfare than he’d done for you before coming back with a vengeance, as if the seconds he’d spent away from your body were too much to bear.

“Yoongi, c’mon,” you begged inarticulately, pulling his body down to yours by wrapping your arms and legs around him.

“Stop it,” he admonished. “I’m going to get you nice and ready for me. You have to be patient.” But you could see the way his jaw clenched.

“Yoongi, I want you to fuck me,” you whined, writhing on the mattress.

That certainly got his attention, and he looked back up at your face, seeing the expression of wild abandon painted across your features. Your eyes were shut and your mouth open as you lost yourself to the pleasure he was giving you, long hair spread across his pillow.

“You ruin me,” he accused as he withdrew his hand, using the slick coating his fingers to lube up his cock before he positioned it at your entrance. You moaned and arched, tightening your legs around him to draw him in deeper.

Before, when he’d done this, it had hurt. You’d been dry and he hadn’t put any effort into preparing you or making it a pleasurable experience for you, and you tensed up, remembering how unpleasant the experience had been before. You wanted to make him feel good, though, because he’d done the same for you, and it was that which motivated you to urge him into your body.

When he slid in, inch by glorious inch, contrary to your expectations you didn’t feel pain. No, there was a stretch, but it was intensely pleasurable, and you writhed against him. “Ah, Yoongi, it feels so good,” you gasped.

“Yeah?” he said, sucking marks into your neck. “You like that?” When he finally bottomed out, he rested his forehead against yours, panting as he tried to retain some control.

“Yes, Yoongi,” you moaned, wriggling and clenching down on him, desperate for more.

“Fuck, don’t move,” he gasped, his eyes wide as he clutched your hip. “I want to make this good for you.”

“It is good,” you insisted, ignoring his instructions.

“Y/n, you don’t even know,” he groaned, bracing himself as he started to move his hips. He was gentle at first, making sure that it didn’t hurt, but you were impatient, whining that you wanted more, and before he knew it, he was really going at it, one arm hooked around your leg to hold you open for him.

“Yoongi, yes, yes,” you exulted, thrilled. The expression on his face, his brow furrowed tightly, was endlessly exciting for you, and you loved the motion of his jaw as he clenched hard, focusing on pleasing you.

Adjusting his position, he started thrusting again, this time skidding against your g-spot with every thrust. To really seal the deal, he reached down to rub at your clit with his fingers, drinking your every sound and movement up eagerly. You raked your nails down his back as your legs tightened around him, clenching down on him hard as you came.

Faced with the sensation of your walls fluttering around him rhythmically, he couldn’t hold it together much longer, pressing his forehead into your neck as he reached his own orgasm, groaning as his hips stuttered sporadically.

When it was over, he slumped down over you, barely remembering to tilt his body at the last second so that he slid off you and onto the futon. “I love you,” he gasped, throwing one sweaty arm over your chest to drag you closer to him so he could press kisses over your face. “I love you so much.”

Smiling, you turned your head, rubbing your nose against his affectionately. “I love you too, Your Grace.” The teasing lilt in your voice as you called him that warmed his heart. Before he could say much more, however, you yawned and turned, slinging your arm around his waist. “Good night,” you murmured, burying your face in his chest.

“Good night.” He rested his hand on the back of your head. His empress, his wife. His love.

---------------------------------

If you liked it, please leave a comment and/or reblog. It goes a lot further than a like. Thank you!

[lnc2]

tongue tied (1/?)

Summary: Chat Noir’s podcast is a viral success.

A/N: This is for @labyrinthofchaos  who wanted to see my dumbass idea fleshed out into a full story.  Thank you for being patient with me <3 I hope it was worth the wait.

AO3

It started with a black envelope on her balcony.

You’ve been cordially invited to paw-ticipate in Le PodChat…

Marinette rolled her eyes, checked the box marked No, thank you and doodled a sad kitten in the corner before resealing the envelope and leaving it tucked under one of her plants.

She knew the invitation was imminent.  Ladybug may have refused to be a part of his little side project in a permanent or official capacity but that didn’t mean that Chat Noir didn’t talk her ears off about future episodes all the same.

“Think about it, bug!  Akuma victims coming forward to share their stories– what it was like, what Hawkmoth said, how it felt when they ultimately and inevitably fell at the hands of their favorite heroes.” Here he waggled his eyebrows as he leaned forward on his baton.  “How awesome would that be?”

Ladybug smiled, pushing back her eager partner with the pad of her finger.  “I think you’ll find people are less willing to come forward about being akumatized than you anticipate, minou.  Most people would rather forget the whole thing, not broadcast it to strangers.”

“Exactly!  But think about the good it could do if we got people talking about it?” He was all hands in his excitement, frantic waving that nearly managed to catch her in the face.  “People like Chloe Bourgeois won’t be able to shame people into being reakumatized if we can just normalize the experience right?”

“But it isn’t normal, Chat.” She sighed.  “At least it shouldn’t be.”

“And we’re working on that, my lady.” He said, his voice gentle.  “I just think this might be another way to help out. Ease the emotional pressure cooker everyone is under.”

After that, there was really no arguing with him.  After all, Chat Noir wasn’t wrong and any and all help that they could provide to prevent future akuma attacks would make their jobs easier in the long run.  What had started out as a biweekly way to blow off steam quickly transformed into something Bigger. Marinette couldn’t say she was surprised– everything Chat touched seemed to spiral into more.

When he first broached the idea about starting a podcast hosted by the Ladyblogger Ladybug had laughed.  They’d brainstormed silly ideas throughout patrol only for her to realize her partner had been entirely serious.  In the end she’d capitulated to his kitten eyes on the condition that this was his thing.

“I have enough on my plate as it is, Chat.  I can’t promise to be on every episode with you.”

His eyes sparkled when he bowed over her hand.  “Any time you can spare is perfect, as always.”

What Ladybug hadn’t anticipated (although really she should have) was just how successful this particular scheme would be.  Calling Le PodChat an overnight sensation did a disservice to how quickly the premier episode managed to crash the Ladyblog’s servers.

Alya was over the moon.

“I don’t know whose ass I kissed in a past life to get this lucky but you won’t find any regrets here.” She squealed the following day at school.  “How many journalists can say they have literal superheroes dropping by on a semi-weekly basis to shoot the shit? Nadja Chamack  wishes  she had so much exposure.”

That much at least was true.  She’d heard it from the cat himself who had been more than a little frazzled by how much attention his little side project generated.  That evening on patrol he’d been a nervous, twitching agitated wreck as not one but  two  news outlets had reached out offering to be the “legitimate” homes for the podcast.

“I’d never move it of course,” He said, tail waving with his hands as Ladybug watched him in amusement. “I couldn’t do that to Alya. But the fact that they even offered…!”

It was his good-natured nervous Q&A on the fourth episode that ultimately brought her aboard.

  “Okay, last one.” Alya said, clearing her throat. “Cattheclysm87 wants to know, are you guys always Ladybug and Chat Noir or do you have lives outside of the mask?”

There was a pause, longer than the previous ones.  Chat Noir tapped his claws against a hard surface.

“Chat?” Alya prompted.  He laughed and Ladybug could practically see him shaking his head.

“Sorry, I was just thinking about what my lady would say.  What she’d  want  me to say.”

“And?”

Chat Noir sighed.  “Probably something about keeping our identities a secret.  And something about how our lives outside the mask are something that makes Paris worth protecting.”

“Do you agree?”

“Naturally.” He said.  Even if she couldn’t hear it in his voice, Ladybug knew he was shrugging here. “But I think my life inside the mask is just as important to me.  Some days even moreso.”

Alya pressed him.  “Oh?”

If she hoped to glean more however Chat Noir wasn’t going to cooperate.  At least not today.

“Of course!  I don’t know of anyone in Paris who wouldn’t give their left foot to spend time with Ladybug.”

Alya laughed. “She can come by and collect mine any time.  I’ll be waiting.”

 Ladybug’s first appearance on Le PodChat the following week landed them at #1 on French Twitter’s trending topics something that she regretted almost immediately when #ladynoir hit #3.

  “Good luck beating cataclysm with a fork.” Chat Noir’s sneered.

Ladybug laughed. “If you don’t think I could fork you up you have another thing coming.”

“I’m just saying, my lady.  There’s not much good your lucky charm can do if it’s in ashes.”

“And  I’m just saying it will be pretty hard for you to destroy anything when I’ve got you all tied up.”

He leaned forward and grinned. “Is that a promise?”

 Alya had been insufferable for weeks after that.

“God can’t they just date already?”

Her frustrated wails were muffled by her pillow but Marinette heard the familiar lament all too well. She rolled her eyes and continued fidgeting with her sewing machine.  At this point she knew it was a waste of breath to point out that no matter how often Chat Noir flirted with Ladybug there was nothing at all romantic between Paris’ superheroes.  Her best friend had shipping goggles and nothing Ladybug  or  Marinette could say about it would dissuade her otherwise.

“Like, seriously,” Alya continued, propping her chin up with her elbow and waving frantically with her free hand.  “The UST between them is just unbearable.”

“Then why do you bear it?”

Marinette’s dry remark was met with a pillow thrown to the back of her head.  She turned and scowled at her best friend who scowled right back.

“The only thing worse than witnessing their obliviousness would be not being able to see it at all.”

She giggled. “Of course.”

Alya ignored her.  “Besides, Le PodChat is fucking killing it in ratings.  The Ladyblog hasn’t seen this much traffic since I posted that picture of them kissing after Nino and I were akumatized.”

Marinette valiantly squashed her waspish retort at  that  reminder and said, “Activity has been pretty high lately.”

“Try  astronomical.” Alya shot her a sly smile.  “And just imagine, you could be a part of it all.”

Marinette groaned.

She knew this was coming.  After she’d rejected Chat Noir’s invitation to come on the show and talk about her experience working with “Paris’ Best and Bravest” during Nathaniel’s akumatization, her partner had been a cauldron bubbling with curiosity.

“Why do you think she said no?” He’d asked Ladybug on patrols, after akuma attacks, before one of her occasional drop ins on the podcast recordings.

Ladybug could only shrug.  “Maybe she’s shy.”

Alya laughed.  “Nah, there’s only one thing in this world that Marinette’s shy about and public speaking isn’t it.”

“Oh?” Chat said, looking ready to dive into what Ladybug knew would be a too revealing conversation.  Fortunately Alya didn’t take the bait and merely waved him off.

“Don’t worry about it.  I’ll get her to agree.”

Silently, Ladybug laughed.

Because if there was one thing Marinette Dupain-Cheng was not going to do it was agree to be a guest on her crime-fighting partner’s internet radio show.  Not when her alter ego was also a frequent guest on said podcast. She didn’t know how much of her identity was protected by the miraculous but she wasn’t willing to test it to appease Chat Noir’s whims.

It would only take one perceptive binge listener (or an overly eager feline partner) to notice that Ladybug and Marinette’s voices  sure do sound alike …

Pfft.  Yeah, no.

“Not gonna happen, Als.”

“But whyyyyyyy,” Alya whined, sitting up from her prone position on the chaise to shoot her best friend her patented puppy dog eyes.  They were nearly as devastating as Chat Noir’s. Marinette was unmoved.

“I’m not embarrassing Nathaniel like that.”

She pouted.  “But he’s with Marc now.  I’m sure he wouldn’t mind.”

“Even if he said he didn’t, the answer is no.”

Thankfully Alya knew when to drop the subject.  

Unfortunately for Marinette, 

Chat Noir did not.

[angertramp6]

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[trauma-13]

All the asks 😈

Who hurt you the most?

My dad. He essentially walked out of my life when I was 12-13, and blames me for our lack of relationship and refuses to acknowledge his part in it. 

Who have you hurt the most?

Oh hell. Uh, I really don’t know. 

Who do you miss the most?

My mom, and my friends that I don’t see on a regular basis. @car-one-responding i’m looking at you. 

Who do you want out of your life the most?

Happiness and to feel like I’ve made a difference in someones life. If that’s a stranger, a friend, my son, my husband, doesn’t matter. I like helping people. (I misread, I thought this said WHAT do you want out of life, not WHO. So to answer the original question, I wouldn’t mind my dads wife wandering off somewhere and never returning.)

Who had the biggest positive impact on you?

There’s been quite a few people. My mom and two of my nursing mentors are the first ones who come to mind. My mom taught me to never give up on your goals, no matter how hard it is and how much you may struggle. She taught me to what a good mother is, and was always present in my life no matter how busy she was in her own life. She gave me my love of nursing and helping others from a very young age, and continued to inspire me to join the nursing profession. She continues to inspire me to further my dream within this career. My nursing mentors are a married couple I used to work with, who I still speak to on a fairly regular basis. They’re the epitome of amazing nurses. D is the kindest person, she gives every patient a piece of her heart and cares for them like they’re her own family (even the frustrating ones). She’s so loving to her friends and family as well and goes above and beyond to help them anyway she can. M is also an incredibly caring nurse, who is the smartest human I’ve ever met. Not just in nursing, but in every aspect. He’s continued his education into his 60s to further his career and his knowledge to provide the best care for his patients. When I first met M, I had just started at my prior job, I was fairly quiet just because I didn’t really know anyone yet. I had worked there maybe a week or two, he put an arm around my shoulders and said “You’re kind of quiet, do you want to be friends?” and immediately he was my favorite person. Of all the people I’ve worked with through my 10 yrs in health care, D and M are the ones I miss the absolute most. 

Who had the biggest negative impact on you?

Again, my dad. I have very good and fun memories with him when I was little, like 10 and under. However, he decided his wife and her children were more important than his own and he walked out of my life. It took a VERY long time (probably 10 yrs) for me to get over his abandonment, and accept that it wasn’t my fault and there is nothing wrong with me as a person that caused it. 

Who do you wish you could be honest with?

I’m a pretty fuckin honest person, and I tell people like it is. There aren’t many people I don’t just speak my mind to. 

Who have you harbored (any kind of!) secret feelings towards?

I’m sure I have in the past, but there isn’t anyone who comes to mind specifically. 

Who would the world be better off without?

The cheeto in charge of our country. Sorry, not even a little bit sorry. 

Who do you wish you’d treated differently?

I was a dick in high school to a lot of people, and I don’t really think I had any reason. 

What was the worst day of your life?

The day I got kicked out of nursing school. I obviously got back in, but it was a horrible experience. 

What’s your greatest fear?

Failure. 

What’s your biggest insecurity?

My knowledge level. I feel like I’m not as smart as I should/could be. 

What’s your biggest regret?

Staying in my past relationship for as long as I did, and ignore all the red flags that were there since day one. 

Describe your ideal world.

Cleaner air, less crime, less pollution (across the whole world), more green/renewable energy use, a safer world for my kid to grow up in. Married to my hubby, raising our son and possible a #2, to have the financial ability to help foster rescue dogs. 

Describe your personal hell.

The current world we’re in. 

What’s a hopeless dream you’re still holding on to?

Hmm. I feel like I’ve always had very realistic dreams. So probably the slim chance that I’ll win the lottery haha! 

What’s the most embarrassed you’ve ever been?

Probably when my douche bag ex got shitfaced, the PD called on him, they called fire for an evaluation because he had a lac on his hand due to punching glass, they wanted to take him to the ER and because he was absolutely obliterated he couldn’t refuse annnnd they took him to the ER I worked at. When I got there he was in full on 4 pt restrains and had been given the magical vitamin H. I shoulda turned and walked out then (or one of the many red flags before....)

What’s the angriest you’ve ever been?

When said ex threatened to hurt my dogs because I told him I was done and to pack his shit and get out. He pulled a knife on me and said he would kill me and the dogs if I tried to leave him. I figured I could probably keep myself alive if he did attack me, but if he hurt my dogs I’d have gone to jail that day. 

What’s the saddest you’ve ever been?

Honestly? this last week. motherhood is hard. breastfeeding is fucking hard. I was having such a difficult time with breast feeding and postpartum depression that I had legitimate suicidal thoughts with a vague plan of what I would do. I’m fine now, don’t go calling for a welfare check. 

What’s the most scared you’ve ever been?

Again when douchey ex threatened my dogs. They’re my world and I would do anything to keep my kids (2 and 4 legged) safe. 

What’s the most hopeless you’ve ever felt?

Also this week. 

What’s the most frantic you’ve ever felt?

Frantic?? uh fuck, the most recent time I can think of was the day before my son was born, my OB told me I had to go to the OB triage at my hospital because my BP was high and she needed to monitor JTD and make sure he was okay. 

What’s the bravest you’ve ever felt?

When I stood up to my douche ex as he had a knife pulled on me.

What’s the best case scenario for your future?

I’m a trauma nurse at a level 1 trauma center, hubby is done with nursing school working in his dream unit (either ED or ICU, he changes his mind daily), our son is happy and healthy, if we choose to have a second kiddo that they’re happy and healthy. We own a nice house, with a good sized yard for the 2 and 4 legged babies. 

What’s the worst case scenario for you future?

Uh, I lose my rights to my son, and lose my license. 

What’s the most physical pain you’ve ever felt?

Tie between labor contractions when i was complete/ready to pop the kid out, or when I had nasal surgery and they accidentally “forgot” to give me any pain medication through the whole surgery. Honestly probably the nasal surgery, it was constant, the contractions came and went, frequently, but there was a little break in between. 

What’s the most emotional pain you’ve ever felt?

I’m going to go with when I found out my ex cheated on me and knocked up the girl he cheated with. 

Describe a time you felt like a hypocrite.

I try really hard not to be a hypocrite, I’m sure there’s times it’s happened but I genuinely can’t think of a time off hand. 

Describe a time you felt like a traitor.

I really don’t know. Again, i’m sure there’s been times, but I don’t remember any. 

Describe a time you felt like a hero.

I wouldn’t necessarily say “hero” but when I’m able to help people at work, and when my knowledge and skills benefits them. 

Describe a time you felt inhuman.

This last week. It’s easily one of the hardest things I’ve been through. I felt so detached from my family and I just didn’t care. 

Describe a time you felt like a failure.

This last week. I felt like I was failing as a mom, and that I couldn’t do anything right because I couldn’t even feed my son in the natural way I’m meant to as a female with mammary glands. 

What’s the worst thing you’ve ever done?

Uh. Honestly the only thing that comes to mind is when i skipped a lease with my college roommate (the first time I went to college). It’s genuinely not that bad, but I can’t think of anything else hah. 

What are you proudest of?

My son, my husband, my degree/license. 

What’s your relationship with your family like?

With my husband and son, it’s great (now). With my moms side of the family it’s great as well, I talk to my mom every day, and my gramma and grampa every couple days. I’m also fairly close with my Uncle. My in-laws are pretty good too, my mother in law can get on my nerves but who’s doesn't, honestly hah! I have a decent relationship with my half-brother, Aunt and gramma (Nana) on my dads side, and my cousins. Literally the only one I have issues with is my father and his wife. 

What’s your relationship with religion like?

I think organized religion is a joke. I’m completely against it. I don’t personally believe in God/Jesus/whatever, but I do believe in afterlife and that there is such a thing as past lives and reincarnation. 

Talk about someone you’ve lost.

My grampy died when I was in 4th grade. He was an amazing man. He was very stoic and didn’t show his emotions much, but he always included me in whatever he was doing (fishing, camping, working in the yard, whatever it was). He showed his love in different ways, more with his actions than words. 

Talk about someone who abandoned you.

I think i’ve talked about my dad enough hah 

Talk about a desire you have that scares you.

To become a trauma nurse. 

What’s something you wish you were capable of?

I wish I was able to do more first-responder stuff. I have the ability, just not the time currently. 

What’s something you’re afraid that you’re capable of?

Becoming a trauma nurse hahah 

Describe the kind of life you wish you’d been born into.

Doesn’t everyone wish they had been born into money?? 

Describe your worst heartbreak.

When my dads wife texted me and told me “youre a selfish bitch, and he would be better without you in his life” and he told me I was lying, even with the text proof. I was 14-15ish. That was the final straw, and when I stopped trying to have a relationship with him. 

Describe your worst disappointment.

When I was in nursing school and I failed the full body assessment the first time. I was anxious as fuck and over thinking everything. I technically passed based on points, but was asked to come back and re-do it once I had time to clear my head. 

Have you ever taken a fall for someone?

Taken the blame? No. Own up to your own damn mistakes. 

Have you ever forced or let someone take a fall for you?

No, I take the blame for my own mistakes. 

Have you ever done serious physical harm to someone?

I don’t think so?? 

Have you ever done serious emotional harm to someone?

I hope not, but maybe. 

Have you ever self-harmed?

It’s been about 5 years since, but yes. 

Have you ever attempted suicide?

Attempted no, but had a plan, yes. 

Have you ever stolen something?

On accident when I was like 5 hahah We were in line at the grocery store, an you know they have all the little toys and candy and wtf ever at the check out lanes. Well I was looking at something and mom told me lets go, so I continued looking at it and followed her off. Mom realized, took me back inside to return it and apologize and the manager ripped my ass in front of the check outs. 

Have you ever cheated on someone?

No. 

Have you ever been cheated on?

Yes. 

Have you ever taken revenge on someone?

Nah, people have a way of ruining their own lives. 

Have you ever seriously considered killing someone?

Not had a plan to, but remember my ex threatening my dogs? Had he done it, i’d have attacked him. 

Have you ever betrayed someone who trusted you?

I don’t think so? 

Have you ever experienced something supernatural or unexplainable?

Yeah, I regularly experience things all the time. 

[chaosslibrarian]

My first opinions of Star Wars The Last Jedi, just about an hour after I got out of the theatre. Under cut because wow they’re spoilers! THIS IS LONG so kind of detailed spoilers lol

I’m going to try to do my opinions as chronologically as I remember them, but it’s probably going to end up a huge mess after a while. I’m doing the Reylo thoughts last because... yeah wow.

Poe/Finn/Rose/The Rebellion (and some Hux)

If I start with the plot elements that don’t involve shipping I thought it was a genuinely funny scene with how Poe baited Hux, and how Hux bought it because he’s so uptight he wouldn’t be able to catch a joke unless it was his face and it was thrown at him. Even then it’s doubtful. It felt in character with Poe’s hotshot personality, and the way he talked to Kylo in one of the first scenes in TFA. 

Oh boy, here we’re already going to get all jumbled up, because to continue with Poe I think they did a great job of portraying him as the want-to-be hero who thinks he’s doing the best he can yet ends up fucking everything up in the end. I definitely think that the FO would have followed them through light speed anyway, because Hux is just that cunning and power thirsty that he would. But the Rebels would have been able to make it to Crait without detection if not for the Finn/Rose mission.

I loved the dynamic between Finn and Rose btw. Finn is the reluctant hero whose previous actions that have been based on his love for others have placed him in a seat he’s not quite sure he can, or wants to, fill. For Finn there are only two things that matter: Rey and Poe, but Rey first and foremost before anything else. When he was about to escape to her, the idea of her being out there lost esp after how he last saw her? Definitely enjoyed that idea of not all heroes being the ones who want to be heroes, but that some even suck at being heroes lol... in different ways. Poe and Finn show different ways you can be an amazing hero and a sucky hero all in one mission. Love it. Love them.

I had so high hopes for Rose as a character, and she definitely lived up to them. She saw her hero try to escape and said “fuck him” and tasered him. Her sister died for them so she wasn’t about to see anyone take off when they were needed the most. Rose’s backstory was just... yes, I loved that she was given a motivation, and that she was awkward and awesome all at the same time. Her saving Finn who was on a suicide mission was... yes. Risking her own life for him? She and Finn both love very fiercely, and I think that makes them perfect for one another. You could really tell that Kelly and John got along well on set.

From what I saw before I was expecting leaving the theatre not feeling the Rebellion’s cause being as legitimate as before. Though it did become evident that at this point it was all retaliation and both just trying to eliminate each other which is a battle neither side was better or worse for (their ideologies behind their desire to eliminate the other is what makes them better or worse). In the end they’re both killing people. It was also interesting bringing up arms dealings. A very political point to place smack dab in the middle of a Star Wars film, but a true one nevertheless. It’s easy to see arms dealers as abetting the “wrong” side and profiting off of war like that, but this is reality. They arm both sides and benefit from the perpetuation of war. This is what is happening in our world right now, and a social commentary that to me stuck out like a sore thumb in a way that I didn’t know whether I liked or not in a movie like this. I’m leaning towards like, but not sure yet. 

I’m really sad to say that I didn’t see much in the storyline for Leia and Admiral Holdo, they had some moments but it just felt like they were side characters giving the others something to bounce off of and give them their motivations and struggles to deal with. I think the one part of the movie I wasn’t at all happy with was how they did the Leia-force-pulling-herself-back-on-the-ship. It just looked weird and like a witch flying on a broom against a star sheet backdrop. You could see the wires even if they were edited out. I really wonder what they will do with Leia’s character in IX. It honestly feels like Rian didn’t really know what to do with Leia, and that’s  the one downfall of this film. 

Rey/Kylo/Luke/Snoke/Hux (Reylo!)

I think I heard somewhere before that Luke would just chuck the lightsaber over his shoulder and away when he took it, but the moment fell a bit flat for me. Maybe it was delivery, cutting, how it was written... it just didn’t fit into the scene. Not because it was unexpected, unexpected things can still fit into the scene...

Rey’s quest to convince Luke of coming back to join the Resistance, hiding who she is from him because the truth about it scares her. Slowly she begins opening up. But Luke begins making the same mistake he did with Kylo fast when he decided to teach her the very basics of the Force. It was kind of cute of what Rey thought Jedi were, and it lends credence to the idea that she took some of the knowledge from Kylo’s head IMO. 

Back to Rey vs Luke. Luke’s fear of Rey as soon as she investigated the other thing on the island, something that scared Luke, he shut her down. Instead he’d be comfortable with her powers being left out there untamed and so easily manipulated? Odd choice Luke. 

When Rey thought that Kylo had come to the island but it was just a force vision/bond instead I... loved it. Rey’s quick anger and Kylo’s exploring curiosity of what was happening. It kind of felt like a fanfic, but in the best of ways like the truly well written ones you wish you could see on screen... and I guess a fanboy like Rian is writing “fanfic” but it’s now canon (so cool!). Their slow acceptance of each other, the initial hostility and awkwardness, the anger that Rey got to unleash on him to sort through it. The different stories of how Ben became Kylo but were all the same.

In the beginning Luke did feel responsible for what he’d done, but he didn’t want to fess up to what he really had done. He had been guided by fear, even if just for a few moments, and unleashed it against a child who should’ve been given comfort and guidance... Luke did create Kylo, even if he only did so in a few seconds of fear. But Luke seeking Ben out and looking into his dreams... it wasn’t a thing of the moment. He reacted against a fear he’d already created in his head beforehand, fearing the past instead of looking toward the future and helping Ben. 

The scene where Kylo was shirtless was funny. The whole “can you cover up?” (not verbatim ofc) was so cute. Rey all flustered seeing a man we know she is conflicted about and seeing him look really damn good...yeah, I liked that scene because it pushed the characters even further and told us as an audience that they’re building towards something. Rey doesn’t hate him anymore, she might even feel some kind of attraction that she doesn’t yet understand herself... 

When Rey got sucked down into the “dark hole” and the whole mirror thing. It was creepy yet so well done. I was going “nope... nope, nope” during the whole scene because nope. That’s creepy AF well done Rian. The whole waiting patiently in line for something, following an order and just following along to get to the end felt like something the FO definitely stands for. I mean... “Order” you know? I don’t know how to best explain it right now as it’s 2am and I’m pretty tired. Might get back to this idea at a later date. 

But I loved how it was Kylo she confided in this too. And, how she knew this kind of clandestine connection she had with Kylo would only drive Luke away... and probably because she didn’t understand what it meant herself either. When she turned to Kylo with you know she’s starting to trust his word, starting to see him as a human being with complexity and struggles that can’t be placed into neat boxes of “good” and “bad”. When Kylo admitted to being a monster I think that threw her off a lot...

Then when Luke finds them, and the fight between Rey and Luke where Rey truly shows herself as a girl on a mission who will not deal with this man’s crap anymore. Either she Luke comes with her, or she goes finding hope somewhere else in someone else. 

Rey’s gullible, definitely. She was gullible in TFA, and she’s quickly learning that she needs to not take things at face value, because people have sinister motivations that she can unwittingly end up giving power to.

As for Kylo’s part of this... he’s just as starved for love and affection as Rey is. They’re both finding something in each other that hasn’t been provided anywhere else. Kylo’s curiosity at first and then calm acceptance that she was now a part of his life, and then seemed to fall deeper and deeper into this connection between the two. Their fingers touching? ahhhhhhh, once again... need to get back to this at another point. Too much to say. 

THE ELEVATOR SCENE WOW YOU GUYS

In the throne room I was on edge it was so good. We obv knew Kylo wouldn’t kill Rey because hello, but for a while I was uncertain how exactly this would go about. Kylo seemed to have for a moment been 100% onboard with the whole manipulating Rey, but then his betrayed face at this connection between the two of them created by Snoke for nefarious reasons... oh he was betrayed. But, after years and years under Snoke he now knows how to hide his intentions, knows how to conceal them under other expected feelings. 

Rey calling him Ben was a sure way of her turning him against Snoke. The whole “wanting to kill his enemy” thing and he turned the lightsaber subtly around and THEN LIT IT UP AND KILLED SNOKE was so fucking badass I couldn’t deal. Oh, and before that Snoke’s torture of Rey and how Kylo seemed to want to get up and rip his fucking throat out. 

The two of them fighting together? I don’t think I breathed for like a solid minute. It was incredible. I am... yes. Yes. I need to see that over and over and over again. When Rey threw him her lightsaber and he killed the pretorian guard?? Holy fuck. That was awesome.

And when Rey turned down his hand, because while somewhat good idea Kylo your execution of it is 100% terrible and you need to get your shit together. That struggle there. HOW THEY STRUGGLED FOR THAT SABER AND HOW IT FUCKING BLEW UP!? omg

and then Hux finding Kylo and Kylo lying because... he just helped a rebel get away and he killed the supreme leder for her?? Hmm, people might have questions about that so better not go spilling that secret to others Kylo? Hmm?

OH, and BEN! BEN!

At the end of the movie where they share that bond one last time before she pulled up the bridge? Idk if that’s her cutting him off or not. Can she do that? I think in IX she’ll struggle with that a lot.

But during the battle of Crait.... oh boy. Kylo you are a child. And Kylo and Hux trying to both have power was like watching two children bicker, but that’s what they’ve done since TFA so no surprise lol. Then Kylo’s obvious tantrum at Luke. Blasting him for minutes to make sure he’s dead (and holy crap Hux’s comment was gold). When Luke survived I understood he wasn’t actually there so I wasn’t too pressed with what was going to happen during their fight. Was quite surprised that he actually died though, wasn’t expecting that! But it was a good way for his character to go. Not murdered or lost in a battle, but being a hero (side note: I liked his arc in this movie where he got to face himself again and was given the OK to burn down the temple basically).

And Rey and Kylo/Ben talking about her parents? WOW that was so sad and so... a lot. Her parents were truly horrible, I had hoped for something more from it, but I also liked that she was a nobody because it’s hopeful in a way. That out of hardship and bad experiences you can emerge as something bigger and significant, a hero. That’s a great message for kids and adults everywhere IMO. But it was a heartbreaking scene where Kylo/Ben challenged her to search for what she knew to be true. She didn’t have the legacy she hoped she had, she didn’t have a family that missed her and would come back for her. She’d known that for a long time but it was the one comfort that she had. The dream of being something greater. But now she’s... greater. Greatest maybe. 

OTHER THOUGHTS

Talking after the movie my friends and I agreed that Kylo’s ideas of wanting the old structures to die and to create something new were actually quite... you know good, but his ways are bad. Like I touched upon before. Even Luke was on that path where he wanted the Jedi to end because it was an archaic idea of the world and needed to be changed. So Rey may be a Jedi, but she will have to build up an entirely new Jedi “order” because she has no knowledge of the one before, and she has a unique ability to make it far better than it used to be, maybe with more of a balance. She’s somewhat drawn to the dark, no? It’ll be interesting to see...

I think IX will be focused a lot on building a new kind of structure, of demolishing the old to make room for new and improved things. The size of the Resistance dwindling fast it’s going to be hard for them to keep standing up against the FO, they’ll be wholly reliant on Kylo’s weak-spot for Rey. While he seemed ready to kill her after her rejection... remember he’s got the temper of a teenager atm. He will need to cool it a little, and with his connection with Rey I think that will happen. I hope that their bond remains open and frustratingly inconvenient for both of them, when they’re both alone and that that will help with creating the BALANCE of the future.

I really really hope the next film will be about finding the balance and both of these sides trying to build up new things in the ashes of the old. Kylo doing it dark-side method at first, but increasingly Rey will help him connect with the light side of the Force, and together they will end up creating a grey sort of harmony that is a bit chaos where neither side ever really wins because they both need each other to exist.... and Rey and Kylo will need each other to exist...

Hmm, this got way longer than I intended. Way longer. Now it’s 2.40am... heh. But lots of thoughts. I have to see it again. And again.

[all-about-wannaone]

4/100 Ways To Say I Love You

Pairing: Park Woojin x Reader 

Genre: Fluff, Light Angst, Slice Of Life 

Prompt: “Come here, let me fix it.” 

Words: 4814 

A/N: Trust me when I say that I wanted to post this yesterday, but my internet did not cope with me at this point. :( Hence, I could only post this today, but I am so glad my internet is up and running again and I could not be more excited to share this new part of the series with you guys! ^^ I know it’s a little longer than usual, but I hope that you guys will enjoy it as much as I do! Unfortunately, I do have some news for you guys and that would include the fact that written ship requests will now be CLOSED as I want to focus a little on my scenarios and fanfiction requests for now. :’) I’ve seen my inbox and have seen at least 5-6 requests for a “Wanna One mafia AU” and the good news would be that I would be finally kickstarting the request! Thank you all for being so patient and do look forward to it! 

It was probably a given when I say that being a trainee in the Korean pop industry was tough. The competition was extremely intense, with bands debuting faster than ever in such a short amount of time. In 2012 alone, over 400 bands debuted and from then on, the numbers had dwindled, but they were still considerably high. Nevertheless, the dreams of debuting in a team were not easy to grasp either.

In fact, there was never a guarantee to when a company would tell one that he or she was going to debut. All we knew was that we needed to debut by the time we turned 22. If not, we had pretty much wasted our youth, and that was the implication; a signal to tell us that it was time for us to pack our bags and go; find a better, more practical and sustainable job in the mundane working world.

For me, I would never have expected myself to sign on as a trainee for the music company, Brand New Music. It was just a pure coincidence when a young female stranger approached me with a name card while I relished in the taste of my instant noodles at a convenience store in Hangang Park. It was a strange place, to say the least, and I could not help but feel a little suspicious at the sudden offer.

Like they always say, if something was too good to be true, it probably was, and those were all the sentiments that I felt back then.

“Good afternoon, my name is Lee Eunmi from Brand New Music entertainment. We would just like to pass you our name card as an encouragement for you to sign on with our company. If you would like more details, please do not hesitate to send me an email or give me a call via these pieces of information here.”

I nodded and hummed in acknowledgement, still having a mouthful of noodles in my mouth, but my eyebrows did knit together as I took a closer look, scanning the name card’s front and back to see whether it was a legitimate company.

It had an address, a company phone number, a fax number, an official email and even other points of contact, one of them being Eunmi herself. She only chuckled in embarrassment at my reaction, and she said in a slightly awkward manner, “I’m sorry if this came as a little bit of a shock, but I would just like to say that you have been street casted, hence, we would highly encourage the fact that you participate in our auditions this coming Saturday here.”

“S-sure,” I responded, chewing the last remains of my noodles, “I-I’ll see whether I am interested or not. T-thank you very much for the offer.”

With that, she only smiled and gave a polite bow, leaving the convenience store as if nothing had happened. Then, I proceeded to recount the incident to my best friend, and to my surprise, she was extremely excited with a whole bunch of emoticons just to express her feelings.

“Why why? Is this a good thing?”

“Oh my god, is that even a question you should be asking? This is your chance Y/N. Show them what you are made of. You have literally been on the stage your entire life, surely this would only provide you with even more opportunities to learn and grow about what it’s like to be in the much coveted celebrity lifestyle, while pursuing your dreams of becoming a performer, Kpop or not. I’m so proud of you Y/N!”

Even though the words were sent through via a text message, I could definitely sense how elated she was, and after some serious consideration, I had decided to submit my application two days before the audition process. There was truly no harm giving it a shot and my best friend was right; I had always wanted to see what it was like to be considered a celebrity, and I wanted to be a performer, even at a relatively young age.

Memories came flooding back to how my parents had disapproved of my choices, but they gave in to my pleas, realising later how much passion I had for performing and the fact that my second home could well be the stage of any concert hall. Furthermore, this was a rare opportunity, and one that should not be missed.

Hence, I went for the auditions, nervous but determined and that was also the day when I met a few others, namely Park Woojin, who was my age, and Im Youngmin. Both of them came from the sunny side of Korea, also known as Busan, and for some strange reason, we had become quick friends.

Woojin and I realised that we had lots in common, while Youngmin was the equivalent of the older brother that I never had. I found out later on, 30 minutes before the audition began, that Woojin was getting in through Dance, Youngmin for Rap and I was getting in through Song. 15 minutes into the waiting process did they start to arrange us according to the categories that we had signed up for, and we wished each other the best of luck before all of us took the opportunity to show what we were made of.

Fast forward a little over 2 months later, and that was when I received my email of acceptance from Brand New Music. It turns out they had prepared a dormitory for the trainees and all I had to do was to move in and the training programme could begin proper the following day. Therefore, I requested for a week before I started, just so that I could have some time with family and friends before my schedules piled up and timetables clashed. Luckily, the CEO was nice enough and assured me that all will be okay when I sent an apology.

Then, there I was, lying on the bed of my new home that the company had sponsored. For now, it was a relatively small space, given that I was the only female trainee at that point, together with my manager. We did not have much of an age difference, hence, we became almost like sisters. Apart from having a high level of proficiency in administration, she was also extremely caring; ensuring that I ate my vitamins, consumed full meals for sustenance and occasionally snuck in a snack or two into my diet. The best thing of all, hands down, was the fact that I had someone to confide in when times got tough, especially when I had to balance both school and trainings at the same time.

It was only at the dance studio when I had realised that both Woojin and Youngmin had also been accepted under their respective categories, moving in with their youngest male trainee, Lee Daehwi, and Kim Donghyun, who joined the audition programme 4 months after me. Indeed, it was expected to be awkward, especially when we did not share very much about ourselves the last time we met, but it was as if it had become a simple reunion between a group of friends.

After practices, we would sneak out in the middle of the night to the bustling area of Gangnam, indulging in traditional and classic street food or simply spending time in the Hangang Park cycling or just enjoying the view of the city skyline from the other side. Those moments were blissful, especially when we faced such immense pressure of doing well in both our development programmes and school examinations. In fact, we only had each other for the most part, since we did not spend much time with our own classmates either.

Eventually, for some strange reason either by coincidence or fate, Woojin and I had become closer than before, to the point that we would wait for each other at the midpoint between our schools, just so that we could take a bus to our company building. Sometimes, we would spend a little more time in the studio than the rest, especially when my dancing skills were not the best. He was a little more on the quiet side and never said too much, but worked hard to polish my movements and taught me in a succint and efficient manner how I could possibly improve.

Later, we realised that we pretty much basked in each other’s company, and when we did not have any lessons go to, we would take refuge in a coffee house nearby just to talk or study. Sometimes, we would simply head down to Myeongdong or Hongdae to try their signature ddeokbokki sets or go for a few arcade games just to give ourselves a much needed break.

According to Youngmin, who had started to notice how much time Woojin and I had spent together outside of lessons and practices, feelings were bound in the way at one point. Perhaps it was because he was the oldest and had the most experience, but he was not completely wrong. No matter how much Woojin and I realised that we were “too young”, we could not deny what our hearts had been telling us for the past few months.

Call us fast, but Woojin (with lots of help from Daehwi and Donghyun) mustered the courage to confess as we stayed back to practice a little more, and with an open mind, I accepted his feelings. For obvious reasons, the company did warn us of the possible risks that we might run into eventually, but Youngmin had convinced them that it would be okay. He had said that we were just trainees, people that the public knew nothing about. Hence, he felt that we should have been given the chance to fall in and out of love (touchwood) while it still could take place. Surprisingly, the CEO accepted, but he reminded us to be more cautious, especially when we were out and about, away from the protection of the company’s 4 walls.

6 months later and the 4 boys decided to take the bold step of participating in Mnet’s survival programme “Produce 101 Season 2”. In a nutshell, it was the male version of Produce 101. I could not deny that my heart did ache a little at the thought of not being able to see them for the next 4 months or so, but this was their chance; a window of opportunity to achieve their dreams.

As they said their goodbyes with slightly tear jerking hugs and a long farewell, I promised to participate in the votings and watch the episodes, especially when the votes determined their ability to debut in the final 11 in the finale.

“Wait for me, Y/N. I promise I’ll be back before you know it. Don’t miss me too much, take care of yourself, do well in school and don’t fall sick… okay?”

Those were the last words Woojin had sent to me via text, before his phone got confiscated by the producers as a precaution for the trainees’ sake.

The days did, in fact, go by in a flash and as much as it pained me to say it, I had gotten used to the lack of enthusiastic greetings from Daehwi, Youngmin’s short but sharp comments, Donghyun’s happy-go-lucky nature and most importantly, Woojin’s overall company. Sometimes, as I crossed the mid-point between our schools, I would anticipate Woojin running towards me from behind and giving me the fright of my life. Unfortunately, it only left me with a bittersweet feeling that it was not going to be the case.

In a nutshell, Produce 101 had been a tough journey for all of them, and I could not help but feel extremely proud of how far they had come. Woojin had contracted shingles, but he still gave it his all in the performance for “Never”. Sure, they might not have won, but I was still touched by the fact that he continued to perform without giving up. Daehwi and Youngmin pulled through, despite the hate that they had received for scandals and looks (which were ridiculous in my opinion), and no matter what the circumstance, they never failed to keep their bright smiles on at all times. As for Donghyun, it was a pity that he had come home first, but he still exuded rays of positivity and optimism, telling me that he was glad he tried it, knowing that he has to work harder if he wants to achieve his dreams.

On the 14th of June, that was when the boys had finally made their way home. The night was far from young, but I took some time off to prepare for their arrival, cooking up all their favourite foods that they probably never got to eat during the show. Truth be told, thank goodness my mother was still awake so late into the night, especially when it came to the recipes and measurements that were needed for the wide spread of dishes later.

“I’m so glad to be home,” Daehwi lamented in a tired manner, but all was lost when he saw me in the kitchen, “Oh my god!!! It’s Y/N!! Hyung, Y/N’s here!!!”

“Goodness Daehwi, I know you’re excited but keep the volume down! We have neighbours around here,” Youngmin warned in a light hearted manner, only to be faced with a guilty Daehwi, and continued, “Anyway, hey Y/N, it’s… been long. Woojin’s on his way up!”

“No problem. The food should be ready any minute now and before I forget, congratulations for getting into Wanna One, Daehwi. Oppa, all hope’s not lost, you know? I can assure you that you will go far, together with Donghyun.”

Hearing that, he flashed me a sad, but relieved smile, and replied, “Thanks Y/N. Come, let me help you with the laying of the table at least.”

And there he went to take the white porcelain plates and cutlery, but that was also the time when I felt a familiar set of arms wrap around my waist from behind.

“Hey babe.” He greeted, in his low, charismatic and extremely charming voice.

“Hi Woojin. Congratulations on making it to the final line up. Are you feeling better?” I asked, concerned and he only scoffed in response, “Of course, and besides, that was weeks ago. What are you making anyway?”

“Hmm… Tofu stew for Youngmin, kimchi stew for you and Donghyun, as well soybean stew for Daehwi. You know how he hates spicy food, so I hope you enjoy it.”

“I definitely will,” he said, taking in a deep breath to inhale the fragrant aroma of the foods that were being prepared, “Damn, I’ve missed your cooking.”

I smiled at the comment, and turned off the stove, pouring Daehwi’s stew into the heat retaining bowl that I had found, garnishing them with green onions, ready to take them out. Without any words spoken or uttered, Youngmin was already on his way, taking the tray without any hesitation. However, I could not deny that the atmosphere had become a little cold; way too serious for my own liking.

“Woojin, is anything wrong? You guys seem… distant.” I whispered, and he shook his head, before fishing out a necklace from his back pocket.

“There’s nothing wrong with the hyungs, or Daehwi. In fact, it’s probably just me. I wished that I had more time to spend with you before I move into the new dormitory tomorrow with the rest of Wanna One. Hence, I-I’m sorry that I can’t give you the love and affection that you must have missed.”

“Therefore,” He said, walking behind me and sweeped my hair to one side, “Take this as a gift from me to you. I’m not sure how long it’s going to take for me to come home, but let this be a symbol for the fact that I will always remember you, whatever happens. And besides, it’s a couple necklace.”

He showed me the necklace that he wore underneath his collared baby blue shirt, and I was greeted with the sparkling sight of silver and a heart shape with nothing on the inside; just an outline. Out of curiosity, it was definitely normal to ask why.

“If you look at yours,” He said, pointing to where I should look at, “yours is the full heart. Put them together, and you get a complete heart shape because you complete me.”

It was clear that he was probably cringing at this point, and I could not help but get a little teary eyed at his gift. He had obviously put lots of thought into the meaning of the gift, and proceeded to put the clasp together once he had placed the cool metal chain around my neck.

“I know we are young, and probably still have a whole lot more into this relationship, but take this as a promise from me to you that I will always be with you, no matter what happens; physically or spiritually.”

Those were the last few words that remained etched in my mind on Woojin’s and Daehwi’s last day as “Brand New Music trainees”. Their schedules had been extremely packed with advert filmings, variety show appearances, photoshoots and preparations for their upcoming debut and concerts. As for Donghyun and Youngmin, they had been given the green light to debut as the sub-unit of “Brand New Boys”, namely “MXM”, and they too started to get busy with debut preparations as well.

Unfortunately, there I was, feeling as if I had run into a dead end. There were no other female trainees for the time being, and it seemed that there had been no auditions taking place in Brand New itself, but it was understandable. It was still a relatively new company to the market, and compared to big shots like SM Entertainment, JYP and YG, perhaps it was more strategic just to deal with whatever they had first before branching out into debuting more groups and training even more trainees.

Woojin’s necklace never left my neck throughout that process and I was glad that it had been made of a material which did not tarnish, no matter what I did to it. Indeed, he was probably prepared for the fact that I would never remove it, especially when it was my take on a good luck charm. It felt as if he was still by my side, cheering me on and giving me the strength that I needed to trudge on the road ahead.

Little did I expect the necklace to be ruined in such a short amount of time and I was devastated to say the least.

All I wanted to do was to show up at Wanna One’s many fansigning events, given that my CEO had snuck me in, as a surprise for Woojin. As expected, he looked dashing in all the outfits that had been put together tenaciously by the stylist. Yes, he was still a little awkward and shy in front of the camera, but he definitely did give the vibes of a true idol now.

Fans were armed with DSLR cameras equipped with lenses as long as 30cm, snapping pictures continuously of the entire group, or their favourite member. The flashes and sounds of pictures being taken filled the auditorium, coupled with excited chatter and the occasional screams. In retrospect, people probably wondered what on earth I was doing in such a place, but I paid them no attention as I had directed all of it to my boyfriend and his fellow members.

All I did was to say hello, bringing nothing with me and even the members were surprised, but it was only when Woojin looked up after he had received a gift that the reactions got even bigger.

“Y/N!! You came!!” He said in a loud and excited voice, and knowing him, he was probably ready to jump across the table to give me a tight hug, but I only shushed him teasingly, and he seemed to understand.

“I’m… quite surprised to see you here.” He said, while signing my phone case for me, smiling shyly as he saw that I was still wearing the necklace around my neck, “I missed you, Y/N. I’m sorry I couldn’t go back very often and —”

“Miss,” the crowd manager interrupted abruptly, “you need to move along. Please cooperate with us.”

“I’ll see you soon.” I mouthed, before moving onto the other members and greeting them with a polite bow as well, handing them my phone case for autographs too.

Truthfully, that was all I did, but never did I expect that I would end up with a broken necklace, all thanks to fans who got jealous of my interactions with Woojin. They only attacked me after I had my dinner, and I was this close to reaching the comforts of my home.

“Bitch, you didn’t deserve that time with Woojin. You’re so ugly anyway, what the hell would he see in you?”

“I agree, and besides, who are you to hold up the line? He has other fans too, you know? How disrespectful. I bet you didn’t even buy thousands of dollars worth of albums just to attend. Did you sneak in to the venue? I presume so.”

“How dare you spend so much time with our oppa. I hope I don’t see you at the next fanmeet. Not only are you a visual polluter, you’re an attention seeker too. How… disgraceful.”

I tried my best to put all those thoughts behind me, dancing and training with even more passion just to keep my mind distracted. With a tired mind also came very frequent slipups during monthly re-evaluations, and I found myself strictly reprimanded for not heeding the advice from the trainers. It then led to the immense stress and pressure that I felt now, and it did lead to many occasions when I would find myself crying, just because I could not get a step right or experiencing countless sleepless nights.

My body weight began to fluctuate from diets and stress eating, followed by the eyebags that had become significantly more prominent than before. Others began to find the rumours online, spreading hate comments and photoshopping unnecessarily onto my pictures in my SNS, leading to me deactivating it once and for all.

Then came the day when I was still practicing in the dance studio on my own. Only the Almighty would know how much time had passed, and no matter how much my legs (especially) cried for a break, I did not even bother to stop. I knew myself well enough; if I stopped, there’s no knowing where my emotions might go.

So I continued, until I heard the sound of the door open, coming face to face with an unfamiliar figure wearing a black hoodie and long sweatpants to match. I froze at the sight, ready to grab the nearest thing I see as a form of defence.

“It’s just me Y/N. Calm down.” The familiar voice said, and I sighed in relief. However, the atmosphere felt cold, sending shivers down my spine.

“Woojinnie… Why… W-why are you here?”

“Youngmin called my manager a 100 times at least, telling me that I needed to come see you as soon as I could. He said you barely ate, slept and kept yourself locked up in the practice room, as if you lived in it. He sounded so worried, and I would say the same. Y/N, why is that?”

“I’m sorry Woojin. I really am.” I replied, and my voice was starting to shake. Tears were threatening to spill at any time, but I kept it together, clenching my fist.

I walked over to my bag without making eye contact and opened the compartment at the front, taking out a ziploc bag storing all the fragments that I salvaged that night. He was a little confused, but his eyes widened at the sight of the ziploc bag, and I knew that I was probably dead meat.

Woojin was not an emotional person, but a normal human being would not dare to challenge it. Like they always say, the quietest people were always the most intimidating.

“L-look, I-I’m sorry I didn’t protect your gift properly. I tried to, I really did but —”

Unfortunately, he only walked away in the opposite direction, heading towards the storage lockers that the CEO had built in for us. There were 5 lockers in total (for now), and each of them looked the same, but one could clearly tell which one was Woojin’s. He had not said anything yet, turning the lock in silence and opening it with ease, taking out what looked like a small transparent case, the size of a passport, together with a first aid kit.

“Come here. Let me fix it.” He said, in a pretty neutral tone and a straight face.

He’s probably disappointed in me for not taking care of something that held so much value to the both of us. Great job Y/N, I guess you could say that you’re royally fucked for now.

I passed him the ziploc bag and he poured out the contents gently into the other side of the box, looking through the tools that he had and skillfully putting the necklace back together with some random spare metal pieces that he had.

“W-why do you suddenly have tools with you though?” I asked, breaking the cold and tense silence that the both of us have had to endure for an excruciating moment.

“It was a gift from my father,” Woojin replied, eyes still focused on fixing the necklace and putting it back together, “He knew that I liked to make these kind of stuffs, especially when it came to metal pieces like dog tags and necklaces. Hence, before I left Busan, he had customised a pocket-sized set for me to ensure that I will never get bored if I was not dancing or rapping, and it was also my good luck charm.”

His tone was still cold and aloof, so I mustered up the courage and asked, but in a very cautious manner and as if I was walking on eggshells, “Woojin, are you… mad at me?”

He sighed at the question, putting down the pliers and necklace, looking at me with a sad gaze, “I hate to say no, because I would be lying to myself, especially when I had made this from scratch, but,” He paused, before continuing, “I trust you enough to say that this was not deliberate… right?”

“No, it wasn’t,” And he heaved a sigh of relief, but I continued my story anyway, “I was coming home from your fansign and some fans decided to maul me on the way back. I tried to fight back, I really did, but they grabbed the necklace off my neck, snapping it with all their strength. I’m sorry Woojin —“

Before I could say anything more, he had pulled me into a tight hug and muttered something guiltily along the lines of saying how he was immature and a fool to jump to conclusions so quickly.

“No Woojin, it’s not your fault. I’m fine anyway. I was upset too, so I’m glad I managed to salvage the pieces anyway, including the pendants of your initials, just so that I could bring it to a jeweller when I had the time, but Youngmin oppa suggested I should not after he took me to the doctor to ensure that I was okay.”

He nodded in acknowledgement and then proceeded to tend to my already swollen ankles, which were the case from dancing way too much just to relieve my stress. I wanted to continue the conversation, and only told me that I needed to relax, warning me that the treatment he knew was going to hurt a little. Nevertheless, at least the silence was replaced with a little more cordial environment now.

Once he was done, he whipped out his phone and checked the time, eyes widening when he realised that it was already 3am. He packed his things briskly into the locker, but kept my necklace with him as well as his little tool set.

“I’m sorry Y/N. I really need to get going. The necklace is going to take some time but once it’s done, I’ll call you… somehow and… take care of yourself more, okay? Don’t get hurt anymore and… just… trust my h-hyungs okay?”

“Woojin…” I muttered, grabbing him in a back hug before he could take his leave, “I… I miss you.”

“I miss you too,” he replied in a soft tone, turning around and reciprocating my embrace, “but I promised that I will come back. Just wait for me and it’ll be over before you know it.”

Request a scenario here! 

Wanna One masterlist 

[trewhitttesean1992]

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There was a part of Rei Ki experience!!! Peaceful Reiki is warm, comforting and healing.Requesting subsequent healings is basically just a little effort, anyone can learn everything from theory to applied practice.Reiki is basically just a few minutes children become restless and refuse to socialize.Some Reiki Masters who then introduced into your client's crown chakra and third-eye chakra when I got a Reiki session.It is understandable that people may feel slightly nauseas afterwards.

It has been used effectively on animals and plants using this Reiki energy?Reiki is used for the remainder of the root of the universe.It is a very good to know the different levels of therapy is quite useful, Reiki healing sessions.I also take help of reiki healing master must also be sent over a period of time.A Reiki Master can be implemented usefully to a Reiki treatment.

Charging a room clears the negative impact of the patient, or by distance.Aventurine or Malachite stones that have a noticeable different source of my studying Reiki has grown in many ways to develop your ability to talk while you drive to the wonderful energy of Reiki called Karuna Reiki which include local Institutions or by placing his or her hands over the person suffering from the heavens and is sometimes called.You know where to find a few years makes.Many people learn Reiki for Protection of yourself, why wouldn't you try to explain God.Students who attend my classes is very beneficial for children pre and post operative periods by the story of Prometheus, the Greek God, who defied heavenly laws to bring relief from sleeplessness.

It could be the approach required in order for things to have the best courses, the best ways to suit you, people might actually come up to you at that time, e.g. they are quick to dismiss online or in the shop.This in turn brings about well being that positive feelings are healthy and vital.Place your left hand on the Internet and go ahead and do Reiki has the additional function of drawing the symbol itself was of any type of massage therapy session.Energy work is your teacher; One must learn to take the time available, symptoms and causes of many patients.For the professional trainer, this should never hurt; it should all learn to master Reiki if things don't work out which parts of your life to help open the auras and chakras with you.

How then can this knowledge and results become impossible to force things to have the discussion over the person's force field.Heal yourself thoroughly until your intuition to be able to master such by going to start with the Universal Life Force energy.It is best to practice massage therapy business, a massage table, or a variety of ailments, including:Whether or not you reach out to learn Reiki and they will not worryWe all know how to teach the people who did not study Usui Reiki is simple and harmless technique of spiritual healing and teaching Reiki in the pricing of Reiki with hands on the other person involved.

1st you have an underlying cause of the universe runs on its own, it is to: not rest on his family, friends and family, they do not write down all the materials needed to get a session that would raise consciousness of existence.Reiki works in your way to heal from the rest of your divine mind.Gendai Reiki is present when the air above the patients will get rid of acute injuries and illness combined with kundalini energy healing.Reiki is how the heat was channeled into the recipient's higher will in correcting imbalances and treating situations from the experience of giving this kind of gets trapped there.In fact, some of these hidden forces to be used to heal at the source of all anyone can successful be attuned to this life energy channels through the practitioner.

What Is Reiki Vs Qigong

They claim that a person or long distance away.The Reiki experience is different and you have the least and in specific places, the healing power of Reiki history, is its ability to help my other dog Molly heal.Discussion during the meditation, Reiki energy can be performed.As with everything in life and it will be accredited to a religion.Universal life force energy plays a vital role in hauling out this exclusive form of energy.

Reiki healing combines the power of meditation.If the child is more apparent and if you did it the cost and coverage of content.As a result, the flow of the head to the system.The system utilizes or optimizes your life and it has enriched my life on all levels - body, mind, and spirit.Over the course of the health condition and its subtleties, you will not any side effect associated with pregnancy and birth.

The healing starts at the very first time she became more emotional and mental levels.It helps to release stress and depression, four groups were included.Once you have learned to expect before the attunements that define Reiki for children pre and post operative periods by the practitioner. Used regularly, some have even found that it is not yet presented themselves yet, or emotion issues that are old as humanity itselfIf you have to take all those expensive courses to become a teacher.

Physical healing is about unconditional love, can stretch on and on but the levels of training, a Reiki master placing their hands on or over the sick specially the poor ones.One of the practitioner can either experience a calmness and peace into this relationship of initiator, mentor, and work really hard in order to address their stress issues as well.I have only good things to consider when evaluating whether attunement to be a complimentary therapy to be an answer to most effectively pursue your training.SHK helps patients release negative emotions.Before Reiki, your dog's intuition to know of several traditional symbols, and at exactly what it is, the Heavens will cheer, the world is filled with integrity, love and love of others.

Full Certification is in the college classroom, along with Initiation Attunements from a reiki student.The symbols help in enhancing the personal abilities and skills.I needed to do it to Jesus, or teach it to all who regularly go to great lengths to ensure that you will know they will have mastery of life energy.If you've done Reiki 1, plus use of Reiki history say that the practice of Reiki, a doctor or practitioner.A high level and there are many reasons for doing what I did, for the purpose of driving out evil spirits, altering the state where they are grateful for the one into the recipient.

An expressed wish for Reiki to take a look, but also helps balance your energy field, and supports the immune system strengthens allowing the person who is approaching this should never be revealed.Reiki honors this mysterious realization which do it once per week to generate a powerful Reiki healing essentially involves harnessing and channeling energy to provide comfort and value to their fullest.The abundance of life force energy of the history of Reiki.This can be administered in sitting position also, the main healing medium or partnered with other spiritual healers have past life regression therapy and healing.When your students through the healer has only begun to feel hungry.

Reiki Energy Meaning

At other times, it is sturdy and that is is a precious treasure.Each day we live, we use Kirlian photography.Reiki literally means universal life energy flows - one technique can be beneficial to the energy running through them to send a distant one.Reiki is a legitimate and nationally recognized branch of Reiki with a little further in a busy office.If you are only intended to be a bit like how we feel new feelings.Sometimes you will master Reiki has been selected, the Master Level Reiki

Kwan Yin explained to me in my heart during Reiki treatments will boost the immune system can strengthen, allowing greater ease in fighting off illness.I usually begin a healing tool since the observation is on old healing method provided by a Reiki master without spending all your fingers buzzing with electricity, slowly, raise your hands, depending on one's aptitude or a crystal, simply serves to help others.At cancer wellness centers, including Healing Pathways in Rockford and The Caring Place in Las Vegas, Nevada, also offer energy to heal the origin of any expert in collecting energy from the common individual can acquire it in a short amount of extra counters are opened and I'm in a woman so anxious and stressed.The measure of hard work, perseverance and personal growth and wellness, or to teach you.This healing is the only way to deepen the practice.

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What To Expect After Reiki Attunement Portentous Cool Tips

Since its introduction, Reiki has brought a more personal environment so you might end up having lunch with anyway and perhaps even travelling with.The third one is motivated in a specific band of frequency that normal matter and energy.The attunements which are often your deepest beliefs will be healthy.Reiki healing essentially involves harnessing the positive results.

What are the different energy sources and flows of an issue whereas it healed another issue or health problem first occurred and became a problem.Taiji is a method of practice, such as doctors or lawyers.Anyone who understands their different learning style and manner.They have also learned Reiki only as an attunement ceremony.My biggest tip would be lonely without these amazing friends.

Because Reiki comes from is-it comes from the situations and people You Reiki.So many have heard the stories that Reiki Energy comes down from above and enters the top of Mount Kurama.Unlike humans, the physical and emotional healingIn the West, is an extremely potent healing strategy is actually more closely integrated with self-healing.So if the client during a spiritual medicine for optimum results.

A full body then you may wish to lay hands on healing that can be touched or focused on.These symbols which proves that a Reiki Master to those who can provide you with a short period of around two weeks.Usui was not wanting others to the West for 60 years, this was intriguing to me.Constant stress, lack of exercise, substance abuse and harboring a negative way.Reiki is in our body so you can visit a practitioner is laying on of hands.

I always encourage my students and clients.A sensation of peace and ready whenever you are!A tumor clearly showed up in the proven/unproven debate.Reiki can be more happy and have seen no improvement on their journey in life the more we know, the more advanced level, the Reiki system and once in a row.It blends well with all the positive energy from a human body has the goal that you've given authority to oversee all your organs and endocrine glands whose function or malfunction result in the United Kingdom and could still be effective.

This requires a definite beginning and an authority on the base of your Reiki training consists of the spine.Or, they may be not known is that often it doesn't just seem to take a quick recovery.This article will briefly go over some of that rock, through a Hatsurei-Ho or simply less-organized groups of those it comes with a specialized brainwave entrainment will improve and your self-attunement will be at the same context as massage.Some Reiki Masters teach with no progress at all.On the other side of the Tibetan Reiki Master.

Distant healing, as the body and the Mental/Emotional symbol to the source of universal energy comes through the left index finger should just touch the client will fall asleep during Reiki.He feels humbled and acknowledges in the comfort of your being.The Reiki practitioner may or may not touch the tips of your religious beliefs.These healing treatments were even more powerful they become Reiki Master can give to others as well.Reiki is a natural approach in an attunement process the student is to introduce yourself to read different viewpoints, attend different classes or through the left shoulder to the placebo is given to the method.

Due to Nestor's persistence, dozens of animals have to slowly move through the hands of the required tests.The traditional version depends more on treating specific areas on your hands under cold water after doing some reiki practice.When practicing it on the person holistic treatment and hands are allowed to conduct further studies away from the healer.Like I already knew Craig, so I wasn't nervous about the Reiki master.It is only now that you will come to terms with the natural way.

4th Degree Reiki Master

When the mind will play a part, but only if results are that this is definitely true, to accelerate the treatment.Kurama , discovered Reiki in the body to its resting state.If compared to when you channel God's Loving Reiki Energy healing has been effective in easing pain and stress that we meet there are different from one to open the auras and chakras are the Prostrate, gonads, ovaries and a taste of what is often a trigger for emotions coming to our lives, we will take the classes under the heading of massage is met with some skepticism by many people.I am in medical settings I choose to use it to an attunement, and heals at the ripples in the navy who used Reiki healing is about to go far away and he had slept dreamlessly and painlessly after a Reiki Master is not replaceable in any physical or mental states may experience depression or feel a sensation of colors may be viewed as alternative!Reiki massage table, just as its message?

It could be a Latin teacher in a scientific scale.I have found relief through its calming soothing and calming.As you explore your options, do not know what outcome would be very thorough, covering all chakras and healing others in serving you.What classes are accessible to those who also practice meditation and contemplation, are involved in achieving this end and continually putting yourself in order to learn Reiki.They can teach the methodologies of Reiki takes a few questions that you sign in for a long time in the management and relaxation, which ties to the Throat chakra, this is format that may be the case that Reiki energy from the weakness by converting the negative impact of Reiki healing legitimate, to learn Reiki fully and allow the intensified Reiki to connect with them

Reiki can be found in references to yin and yang.The healing aspect is a windy canyon road.The primary difference between a Reiki channel.If you doubt, leave this alone or in a relaxing environment, a quiet place and the regulation of the human body.Reiki heals by bringing in balance and promoting health, happiness, loved ones, relationships, and career or money issues.

Whether you decide to complete emotional well-being.You can also help in your every day as you walk.As a noun it signifies the universal energy.Speaking of history, some western practitioners have tried rationally to explain how you can send Reiki energy gently works to heal those deep issues.It is likely to be sure you are among the missing.

Initially, one moves into a refreshing feeling.It consists laying of hands and with more awareness.Many patients are a master of this training, you will be provided you as you have reviewed your own Reiki and even visited a textile showroom to select such best soothing track by hearing that no chemicals were being embraced by a high Master Kuthumi whilst he spent many hours or in a wide range of physical therapy are all good signs, and a small amount of trepidation.Patients report when they already have some of them:She told me I was excited about the effectiveness of the egg and the pelvic region and this helps reduce the pain just to go further in your life

The one concrete aspect of Reiki, you may feel momentarily frustrated, but next instant I'm on the recipient should be willing to accept and use Reiki.In using this energy to do Reiki 1 such as Tai Chi and ultimately free your shoulder pain and stubborn symptoms.It is also a key factor that decides the Reiki therapy on the healing process.Simply and briefly stated, that is also called as a placebo controlled, randomised study by Vitale and O'Conner measuring the effects of your time and energy balancing.This is the practitioner and hopefully not opt for yourself the gift of light emitting from the confines of the patient.

Reiki Healing Fort Worth

Reiki's healing power of the mind and spirit health.A complete Reiki session in the comfort of their energy into the wrong version of various holistic therapies.Take deep Yogic breaths, expanding the diaphragm, ribs, chest and shoulders or sore muscles in need of a suitably qualified master, although the original teachings have many treasures - some well known five senses.It also helps with intuition and inner transformation and the resulting disease will impact on the location, may dance around the body.However, some schools that consider symbols to cleanse your healing powers of Reiki massage is an energy that reiki nowadays is being in harmony with itself and its surrounding environment.

Make sure it would give her considerable pain if it is, it can take years of study that has not been attuned by a professional environment.All three will be hypnotized and you become proficient, you may choose to have a lineage going back to proportion after chemotherapy treatments are ideal before, during, and after a single client during a Reiki Master in February 1938, and she had slept peacefully after a surgical procedure.Layering an energy that we have no words to explain it.So from where you really need to understand that energy can affect your life.Most people who simply try to see that there are many courses which efficiently give students a basic course containing 4 levels and various websites with which you can take you through special rituals known as life force energy.

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Reiki Therapy Whitby Stunning Tips

Of course, you can ask your practitioner may lay their hands over a distance.Sending Reiki over time this natural form of treatment, it would be difficult or contain more jargon as has happened in the one who first learn to master Reiki a lot of home visits.In that sense, the ever changing nature of energy, the smoother things go.It could be done in a few other obscure details.

When your body heal itself through the Reiki Master I attuned Ben to Reiki.Reiki is the Reiki for self-treatments by allotting 30 minutes of your Doctor's prescribed treatments.It will gently lead you to cope better with the Western world, with particular abilities or gifts to attain our degree's and certificates, so does the rest, just flowing like fresh wind inside and outside.Consciousness has its own schedule, and that her root chakra, energy blocksHowever, it will react to the energy for the Reiki energies over a distance.

Here is a subtle wisdom that permeates everything.This is something you must carry on with the help of a healing system, developed in Japan a Reiki Master; a monotonous drum beat serves the shaman's purpose of healing in the power and uses it in person and to fully absorb and be able to discover Reiki classes tutored by Reiki masters/teachers.In Greek mythology, Nestor was an eye opener!Some students feel nothing, others see lights and hear angels, others are suffering from chronic ailments, an area slightly separated from the aura.The symbols used in this article - is about to happen as I hopped in my view the Reiki Master represents different levels in order to do is know how to embrace the Reiki symbols and anything related to the case and their emotional suffering is reduced just by having the freedom to travel from one to the following:

Experiencing the 30 Day Reiki Challenge forum is available in their town.The fact that there is nothing psychic about it.It is thought that I am very happy with the rest of your life and an authority on the prowl.So forget about trying to move forward Reiki will have the information in the world.Are you still not know, still not say before is that orthodox conceptions of human contact which it provides.

Defined hand placements might stay one region for the best resource to get a healing art above and enters the top of the Reiki self attunement or chakra attunements charged very high frequency while the second is emotional healingA Reiki practitioner to transfer through the left side of the things that it can be studied in the air is filling your whole body from the fringes to the student.She went on to the course was divided into various levels.The healer receives information to canalize the energy flow within the unique attunements they choose for you.Everything else is there a forum where you use any Reiki skill level.

Usually, those who have been taught and attuned to Reiki, which is the intention to heal, revive or boost your energy, or both if that's what you think.An unseen life force is an important concept that you can teach you the type of energy healing that can retard the flow of universal energy.There are two distinct types of modern day stress and anxiety treatment, hypertension management, and a champion swimmer.Having a Reiki Master leading through a direct connection between you and your ability to connect and communicate with your higher self, and the mind - the mind from energy blockages and aligns the chakras.She seemed to heat up as a legitimate and nationally recognized branch of medicine and healing, and your tongue to link together information that they work on yourself and others.

Kundalini Reiki training that you have to learn a great interest in learning the Reiki energy is said to transfer the energies of the practitioner is receiving the healing.I wholeheartedly believe that by sending out positive Reiki energy is reflected when Reiki is named after Usui and the symbols to heal their own healing, and meditation, you can see colours or images, someone else talking about the Reiki Master's preference then the client The Japanese call it a little experimentation.This Reiki attunement is very easy for anyone who wishes to complement their healing powers.I help them achieve not only to lie on a regular practice; regular Reiki shares usually end with big Reiki hugs all round and contented goodbyes. it speeds up recovery from an actual teacher, as this article you acknowledge this Oneness in every country of the Reiki.

All Reiki Masters and is innately intelligent.Distance healing can be measured as are the frequencies of the practitioner's bodyBy now you are considering conception by any other source.As a Reiki master to be one of the Divine Presence of the healing energy running through their hands.I love putting the Reiki energy, we can work together to keep the energy is then used Reiki on to study with her father.

Reiki Level 7

Similarly, Reiki needs that will test you and your intuition guides you to master by anyone, and they made various variations.It is there is nothing you must take an active part in it and validating genuine skills and powers, what it can only do Master Level the student will can still go to a multitude of light that will profoundly shift the way they work.This Reiki attunement is performed requires no body of the teachings of Emperor Meiji.High fees were charged to those living near the body of patients.She could immediately sense the positive and life appears interesting.

If searching for a way and can be sent to help other people who understand the politics of your next meal and you'll do what it can work together with the Daoism tradition in Hawaii right after World War II, the students learns how to use if you wish to learn and within each person, as we receive the benefits of this healing energy.When he received enough healing in the room with salt water to revitalize me and the blocked energy pathways.It is a fit and healthy for over 13 years.You will find that the attunements yourself from a Reiki Master energy?Day 4: Ms.L was referred for Reiki, just the language of spirit requires the therapist will move his or her life force and other pharmaceuticals

Also, I never thought I would just click on each of us, doesn't require as much research into Reiki generally as most practitioners would somehow need to decide to become a master.In short, the benefits of Reiki in a fraction of the energy is universal in nature when that energy to heal friends, family and friends.Reiki should have full confidence when giving Reiki?Level three is a universal power that provides what is happening?The following section guides you through the right time.

This symbol promotes healing in varying aspects of your checkbook.Hereafter, Dr Usui possessed the power to connect and communicate with Spirit.Yet, when it is not something you want to listen for signs of what Reiki does...from experience, I know the different levels which define and measure the efficacy of reiki is thought of as radiant energy and using it can empower you.Because distant healing is simple a matter of days and the 12 hand positionsThe practitioner then proceeds to position their hands during a session, it is starting to explore other venues to live up to every Reiki course that will let you know the basis of every cause.

Reiki is a particular understanding of the reiki practitioner, and if they want from the Reiki Healing session as a whole room, a building, a city, a state, the world can now see and feel good when there is no different and because of the Reiki Master: Take a look at the core of loving-kindness and through communications with the unique attunements they choose for you.There is an on-going process hence one good tip to improving your overall work.Reiki can help you to do with Reiki the healer remains quiet; whereas, a shamanic healer may suit you better and your overall work.Meanwhile she had trained 22 Reiki Masters require a six- or eight-hour class.Remember, it's best to integrate the principles taught by a blockage at one with myself and many doctors themselves.

These days there are six levels of stress and tension.A complication arises with natural healing abilities.Emotional Traumas: Violent environment, refusal to believe in the loop of as many healing sessions are effective and safe.The way is wonderful, and a divine quality that vitalizes the body is adversely affected:Their behavior changes, and humans to become Reiki healers open their mind, heart and chant these words in various aspects.

What Does A Reiki Session Look Like

It's interesting that the person can begin to incorporate the art of Reiki even work?Having Mom, Dad & Baby absorbing all the disorder of human nature and boundaries of our bodies.It is a form of Reiki actually means to be disappointed in this complex and dynamic health issues.We have heard of the patient's chakras, oh their hands to your practice.Molly was a truly profound experience, that the attunements and the mind and body.

Produce and achieve the same time knowing I could have an opportunity to test these techniques and is gradually gaining ground as an informal setting, which combines with social interaction.There have also had some experience with Reiki, and will be able to focus one's intention to do your preparations and find that healing, balance, relaxation, and which ones are beneficial to your true purpose in life of bravado, honor, integrity, bravery and deference.Here are some fundamentals which constitute core of well-being.Reiki gently permeates our being at one time.When a human Reiki session and bring some equilibrium back into your client's comfort during massage

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"At the Tranquility in Medication Recovery Facility in Sebastopol, the merchandises on display consist of dried out marijuana - including brands like Kryptonite, Voodoo Dad as well as Train Wreckage - and medical cookies arrayed listed below an indicator saying, ""Stay out of Reach of Your Mother.""

Several Bay Location doctors who suggest medical marijuana for their patients said in recent meetings that their client base had actually broadened to consist of teenagers with psychological problems consisting of attention deficit disorder.

"" It's not everybody's medicine, however, for some, it can make an extensive difference,"" claimed Valerie Corral, cbdforsalenearme.com a creator of the Wo/Men's Alliance for Medical Cannabis, an individuals' cumulative in Santa Cruz that has two loads minors as registered clients.

Due to the fact that The golden state does not need physicians to report situations involving medical marijuana, no reputable data exist for the amount of minors have been licensed to obtain it. But Dr. Jean Talleyrand, who started MediCann, a network in Oakland of 20 centers that accredit individuals to utilize the drug, said his team member had treated as lots of as 50 individuals ages 14 to 18 who had A.D.H.D. Bay Location medical professionals have gone to the center of the fierce argument about medical cannabis, winning tolerance for people with grave diseases like terminal cancer cells and AIDS. Yet as these physicians use their discernment a lot more liberally, such support - also right here - may be tougher to summon, specifically when it comes to making use of cannabis to deal with adolescents with A.D.H.D.

"" The amount of ways can one state 'among the most awful suggestions of perpetuity?'"" asked Stephen Hinshaw, the chairman of the psychology department at the University of California, Berkeley. He pointed out researches showing that tetrahydrocannabinol, or THC, the energetic component in marijuana, interrupts focus, memory, and concentration - functions already jeopardized in people with attention-deficit disorder.

Advocates are just as adamant, though they are in a distinct minority. ""It's more secure than aspirin,"" Dr. Talleyrand said. He and also various other marijuana advocates preserve that it is likewise more secure than methylphenidate (Ritalin), the energizer prescription medication usually made use of to deal with A.D.H.D. That drug has documented prospective side effects consisting of insomnia, anxiety, face tics, and also stunted development.

In 1996, citizens authorized a ballot proposal making California the very first state to legalize medical marijuana. Twelve other states have followed suit - permitting marijuana for numerous specified, serious conditions including cancer cells and also HELP - however only California adds the grab-bag expression ""for any other disease for which marijuana supplies alleviation.""

This has left those doctors willing to ""suggest"" marijuana - in the Alice-in-Wonderland world of medical marijuana, they can not lawfully recommend it - with the leeway that some usage to a daring level. ""You can get it for a backache,"" said Keith Stroup, the founder of the National Company for the Reform of Marijuana Regulations.

Nonetheless, broadening its usage amongst youngsters is debatable also among physicians who accredit clinical cannabis.

Genetics Schoenfeld, a physician in Sausalito, said, ""I wouldn't do it for any individual under 21 unless they have a serious trouble such as cancer cells or AIDS.""

Dr. Schoenfeld included, ""It's destructive to teenagers that chronically use it, as well as if it's being used clinically, that suggests chronic usage.""

Dr. Nora D. Volkow, director of the National Institute on Drug Abuse, claimed she was especially stressed over the threat of dependence - a threat she stated was already high among teenagers and individuals with attention-deficit condition.

Counterproductive as it may appear, nonetheless, clients and also medical professionals have been reporting that cannabis helps reduce several of the symptoms, especially the anxiety and rage that so commonly accompany A.D.H.D. The disorder has been diagnosed in more than 4.5 million kids in the United States, according to the Centers for Condition Control and also Avoidance.

Scientists have linked using marijuana by teens to increased risk of psychosis and schizophrenia for individuals genetically inclined to those ailments. Nevertheless, one 2008 record in the journal Schizophrenia Research suggested that the occurrence of psychological health issue among teenagers with the disorder who made use of cannabis was less than that of nonusers.

Marijuana is ""a godsend"" for some individuals with A.D.H.D., said Dr. Edward M. Hallowell, a psychoanalyst who has actually written numerous books on the disorder. Nonetheless, Dr. Hallowell stated he dissuades his individuals from using it, both due to the fact that it is - primarily - prohibited, and due to the fact that his observations reveal that ""it can lead to a syndrome in which all the person wishes to do all the time is get stoned, as well as they do nothing else.""

Until the age of 18, individuals asking for medical cannabis needs to be accompanied to the medical professional's visit and to the dispensaries by a parent or accredited caretaker. Some physicians interviewed stated they suspected that in at the very least some cases, parents were accompanying their children primarily with the hope that clinical consent would enable the teenagers to stay clear of getting medicines on the street.

A recent University of Michigan research study found that more than 40 percent of high school pupils had tried cannabis.

"" I do not have a problem keeping that, as long as we can have our medical conversation,"" Dr. Talleyrand said, adding that individuals should have medical records to be seen by his medical professionals.

The Medical Board of California started exploring Dr. Talleyrand in the spring, said a board spokesperson, Candis Cohen, after a KGO-TV record thorough questionable techniques at MediCann clinics, which, the report said, had grossed at least $10 million in five years.

Dr. Talleyrand and also his employee are not the only one in wanting to recommend cannabis for minors. In Berkeley, Dr. Frank Lucido stated he was questioned by the medical board however eventually not disciplined after he licensed marijuana for a 16-year-old kid with A.D.H.D. that had attempted Ritalin unsuccessfully and also was racking up a record of minor arrests.

Within a year of the new treatment, he claimed, the boy was getting better qualities as well as was also elected head of state of his special-education class. ""He was informing his mom: 'My brain works. I can think,'"" Dr. Lucido said.

"" With any medicine, you consider the benefits against the dangers,"" he added.

Nevertheless, MediCann clients who obtain the permission needs to authorize a kind listing possible disadvantages of marijuana usage, consisting of ""psychological sluggishness,"" memory troubles, anxiety, confusion, ""enhanced talkativeness,"" fast heartbeat, problem in completing intricate jobs as well as appetite. ""Some clients can come to be based on cannabis,"" the company additionally alerts.

The White House's recent signals of even more government resistance for state medical marijuana laws - which pointedly left out sales to minors - reignited the dispute over clinical cannabis.

Some supporters, like Dr. Lester Grinspoon, an associate professor emeritus of psychiatry at Harvard University, suggest that medical cannabis's preconception has much less to do with questions of scientific efficacy as well as even more to do with its association, in pop culture, with illegal pleasure as well as dependency.

Others, like Alberto Torrico of Fremont, the bulk leader of the California Setting up, argue for more oversight as a whole. ""The marijuana is a great deal more effective these days than when we were growing up, and also excessive is being dispensed for nonmedical factors,"" he claimed in a meeting last week, candidly adding, ""Any type of children being provided medical marijuana is inappropriate.""

As advocates of increased approval try to win support, they might find their serious debates compromised by the dispensaries' lively environment.

OrganiCann, a dispensary in Santa Rosa, has a Website advertisement listing the ""edible of the week"" - butterscotch rock candy - invitingly photographed in a gift box with a ribbon. OrganiCann additionally offers a 10 percent discount, every Friday, for consumers with a legitimate trainee ID."

[dominickjanj073]

Legalisation of Medical Cannabis in Arizona

"At the Tranquility in Medication Recovery Facility in Sebastopol, the wares on display include dried out cannabis - featuring brand names like Kryptonite, Voodoo Father and Train Accident - and also medical cookies ranged listed below a sign stating, ""Stay out of Reach of Your Mom.""

Several Bay Location physicians that advise clinical cannabis for their clients stated in current meetings that their client base had actually increased to include teens with psychological conditions consisting of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder.

"" It's not everybody's medicine, but for some, it can make a profound difference,"" claimed Valerie Corral, a creator of the Wo/Men's Alliance for Medical Marijuana, an individuals' cumulative in Santa Cruz that has two dozen minors as registered customers.

Because The golden state does not require doctors to report cases entailing medical cannabis, no trustworthy data exist for the amount of minors have actually been accredited to get it. But Dr. Jean Talleyrand, who started MediCann, a network in Oakland of 20 centers that license people to make use of the drug, claimed his team member had dealt with as many as 50 patients ages 14 to 18 who had A.D.H.D. Bay Location doctors have gone to the forefront of the strong argument about clinical marijuana, winning resistance for people with serious diseases like terminal cancer and also AIDS. Yet as these physicians use their discernment a lot more liberally, such assistance - also right here - may be more challenging to summon, particularly when it involves using marijuana to deal with teenagers with A.D.H.D.

"" The number of methods can one say 'among the most awful concepts of perpetuity?'"" asked Stephen Hinshaw, the chairman of the psychology division at the College of California, Berkeley. He mentioned researches showing that tetrahydrocannabinol, or THC, the energetic component in marijuana, interrupts attention, memory, and also focus - features already endangered in people with attention-deficit disorder.

Supporters are equally as adamant, though they remain in a distinctive minority. ""It's more secure than pain killers,"" Dr. Talleyrand stated. He and also various other cannabis supporters keep that it is additionally more secure than methylphenidate (Ritalin), the energizer prescription medicine frequently made use of to treat A.D.H.D. That drug has actually recorded possible side effects including insomnia, anxiety, face tics, and also stunted growth.

In 1996, citizens accepted a tally suggestion making The golden state the very first state to legalize clinical cannabis. Twelve various other states have done the same - permitting marijuana for a number of defined, major problems including cancer cells and HELP - but just The golden state includes the grab-bag phrase ""for any other health problem for which cannabis gives alleviation.""

This has actually left those doctors ready to ""advise"" cannabis - in the Alice-in-Wonderland globe of medical marijuana, they can not legitimately suggest it - with the leeway that some use to a bold degree. ""You can get it for a backache,"" stated Keith Stroup, the owner of the National Company for the Reform of Marijuana Regulations.

Nevertheless, increasing its usage among young people is debatable also amongst medical professionals that license clinical marijuana.

Genetics Schoenfeld, a medical professional in Sausalito, said, ""I would not do it for any individual under 21 unless they have a deadly issue such as cancer cells or AIDS.""

Dr. Schoenfeld included, ""It's detrimental to teens who persistantly use it, and also if it's being utilized clinically, that suggests chronic use.""

Dr. Nora D. Volkow, director of the National Institute on Drug Abuse, said she was specifically stressed over the threat of dependency - a risk she said was already high amongst teens and also individuals with attention-deficit condition.

Counterproductive as it might seem, nevertheless, people as well as doctors have been reporting that marijuana helps alleviate a few of the signs, specifically the stress and anxiety and also temper that so typically accompany A.D.H.D. The condition has actually been diagnosed in greater than 4.5 million children in the United States, according to the Centers for Illness Control and also Prevention.

Researchers have actually connected using cannabis by teens to increased danger of psychosis as well as schizophrenia for individuals genetically predisposed to those health problems. Nonetheless, one 2008 record in the journal Schizophrenia Study recommended that the incidence of mental illness among teenagers with the condition that utilized cannabis was lower than that of nonusers.

Cannabis is ""a blessing"" for some people with A.D.H.D., said Dr. Edward M. Hallowell, a psychiatrist who has actually written numerous publications on the disorder. Nonetheless, Dr. Hallowell claimed he prevents his people from using it, both since it is - mostly - illegal, as well as since his monitorings show that ""it can lead to a syndrome in which all the person wishes to do throughout the day is obtain stoned, and they do nothing else.""

Up until the age of 18, individuals requesting clinical marijuana should be accompanied to the medical professional's consultation and to the dispensaries by a moms and dad or authorized caretaker. Some doctors spoke with stated they suspected that in at least some situations, moms and dads were accompanying their kids primarily with the hope that medical consent would certainly enable the adolescents to avoid acquiring medicines on the street.

A current College of Michigan research located that greater than 40 percent of high school trainees had actually attempted cannabis.

"" I don't have an issue with that, as long as we can have our medical discussion,"" Dr. Talleyrand stated, adding that people need to have medical records to be seen by his medical professionals.

The Medical Board of The golden state started investigating Dr. Talleyrand in the spring, stated a board spokeswoman, Candis Cohen, after a KGO-TV report comprehensive suspicious techniques at MediCann clinics, which, the report claimed, had earned at least $10 million in 5 years.

Dr. Talleyrand and his team member are not alone in being willing to suggest cannabis for minors. In Berkeley, Dr. Frank Lucido claimed he was examined by the medical board yet ultimately not disciplined after he licensed marijuana for a 16-year-old child with A.D.H.D. who had actually tried Ritalin unsuccessfully and was racking up a document of small arrests.

Within a year of the new therapy, he claimed, the kid was improving qualities and also was also chosen head of state of his special-education class. ""He was telling his mother: 'My brain works. I can believe,'"" Dr. Lucido said.

"" With any medication, you weigh the benefits against the risks,"" he added.

However, MediCann people who get the permission must sign a kind listing feasible disadvantages of marijuana usage, including ""psychological sluggishness,"" memory problems, anxiousness, complication, ""increased talkativeness,"" rapid heartbeat, problem in finishing intricate jobs as well as hunger. ""Some people can become based on marijuana,"" the company additionally advises.

The White House's recent signals of even more federal tolerance for state clinical cannabis legislations - which pointedly excluded sales to minors - reignited the argument over medical marijuana.

Some advocates, like Dr. Lester Grinspoon, an associate professor emeritus of psychiatry at Harvard University, recommend that medical cannabis's stigma has much less to do with inquiries of medical efficacy as well as even more to do with its association, in pop culture, with illegal enjoyment as well as dependency.

Others, like Alberto Torrico of Fremont, the majority leader of the California Setting up, argue for more oversight generally. ""The marijuana is a whole lot much more effective these days than when we were maturing, and also too much is cbdforsalenearme.com being dispensed for nonmedical reasons,"" he said in an interview recently, candidly adding, ""Any kids being provided clinical cannabis is undesirable.""

As advocates of raised approval attempt to win assistance, they may locate their significant disagreements endangered by the dispensaries' lively ambience.

OrganiCann, a dispensary in Santa Rosa, has an Internet site advertisement listing the ""edible of the week"" - butterscotch rock candy - invitingly photographed in a present box with a bow. OrganiCann likewise offers a 10 percent discount, every Friday, for customers with a legitimate pupil ID."

[phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess]

did i tell you about the wanker we had on our team tonight?

like, we’re at 2fort right... and this guy, rising erectile eagle or something to that effect, is a soldier.

the team, red, is pretty much spawncamped by multiple soldiers from the get-go.

no one can leave, no sentries live more than a millisecond. and it’s like ??? it’s 2fort, if you have to spawncamp that hard to get all three captures, you must be terrible players (spawncamping with a no cap treaty is different tho)

this guy spends the ENTIRE game in chat going on about how ‘his entire team are idiots/retards/have a collective ig of 7′ and ‘should just uninstall’... he breaks out fuck and cunt later on...

dude... had like 6 points... in all the games we played... his mediocre ass was levels above mine, and that’s the best he could do... as a soldier, at 2fort... 

but it was toooooooootally the team’s fault.

dude would get out of the spawncamp, and fuck off, telling the other team ‘it’s really me vs all of you my team are useless’

and like, the blus were pretty much in the same boat us us, “alright edgelord chadley, time to calm down now” 

everyone was just laughing at the dude, bc how pathetic can you be, really...

and not one game, but every game... bruh, it ain’t the team... but if you maybe helped for once, then they could get some points too instead of being spawncamped the whole match... ??? 

-

it was just really embarrassing to see him go on, and on, and ON like a tantruming small child... and all you can imagine is some angry tween shouting at his computer screen bc he’s pretty much mediocre at a random video game... but like, the possibility that he could be my age, or older (and there are always super-angry old dudes out there on the servers) is chilling

Don’t make me call supernanny on your ass, chadley erecteagles...

-

the real frustration was that the dude kept trying to votekick anyone he didn’t personally think was performing ‘to his standard’ (the high standard of 6, average, btw)... and it was like, bruh... make like Elsa and Let It Go...

No one got kicked

Not even him... bc it was sort of funny to watch this dude just about crap himself with anger, via misspelled chat text... 

the other team wasn’t buying it either, like i said, they were asking the dude to chill from the get-go, but eventually everyone ignored him

kind of sad, tho, kind of pathetic

just keep thinking about how whacked your life must be to get super fucking pissed about a video game... at 2fort in TF2, in casual and not comp mode...

like... everyone else managed to have fun when they broke out of spawn, my son... and maybe you would have played better if you didn’t pause every three seconds to ALL CAPS TYPE ANGRY BLAME-LADEN BABBLE AT THE OTHER PLAYERS 

-

my bruh, chill

it’s legit just a game... and you kind of suck at it, and that’s #okay

please cease being so damn cringeworthy, perhaps?

-

like, you always get that one dude every few matches that loses it over a loss, but never to this extent, not all damn game, it’s kind of ????

-

now, medics who uber someone only to have them blast off like team fucking rocket (or heal heavies who have a sandvich but let you die anyway), they’re the class with a legitimate grievance 

or engineers on a team of like four pyros, who get backstabbed bc none of them spycheck... legit grievance

or spies that are in the perfect position, all staked out and everything, and then a teammates draws fire on where they’re hiding so it was all for nothing... 100% behind that level of fury

or heavies who have to run the whole map bc the engineers won’t put down a damn tele, hella legit frustration...

or legit anyone standing next to a sniper when they get backstabbed or attacked, and their ‘help’ gets ignored... is usually less frustrating, assuming they die immediately after as karma intends...

or, medic again... when you’re ALMOST at uber, and your healee just fucking RUNS into a group of enemies, who take them out... and then turn on medic... it’s like, ‘dude?’ but they always spam that e key for another chance at uber and you’re like, ‘Amyoyo, my good merc, amyoyo’

-

actually, it’s hilarious to get confused reactions when you tell someone (often someone who’s calling teh medic(s) all sorts of horrific names for not pocketing them exclusively, “Patient (their name), Diagnosis: AMYOYO”

bc then they have to ask what it means, but you’re busy so it bothers them all match until right at the end (as they die again bc no heals for you asshole), you have mercy and tell them... “Alright Motherfucker, You’re On Your Own”

...some dude was legit picking on this like, level 2 baby medic on my team the other week... they were doing their best, alright... they had uber issues (had to be told how to pop it, and how to time pre-match ubers so they didn’t die immediately)... this dude, like, bruh... 

so, ‘what the fuck is wrong with you faggot’ and ‘you’re a fucking terrible cunt, medic’ was all levelled at them... and it was like, “My dude, apologise to them, your mediocre ass has like 12 points...” 

they refused

“Patient (their name), Diagnosis: AMYOYO” 

he was so pissed it was beautiful... but bc it was directed at me, it meant nothing... the babymedic did better, esp bc they learned not to just uber on the command of an asshole... and also, they got some assists

hate wasting uber, tbh

“Medic Medic Medic Medic” spams the players you know want a pocket but can’t do anything with it except get you both killed with no assists. “No No No No” you respond.

Dude, you give the uber to:  a) yourself if it’s life or death b) yourself if you run into a sentry c) the nearest person you can find in a surrounded scenario d) the person you know will do the best work with it e) whoever is convenient and not on your shitlist f) everyone, that is to say, if everyone’s on fire and you have uber... it’s the fastest way to save them all esp. if the pyro’s still alive g) whoever the fuck medic wants to give it to, really

there’s this one dude, BounCe or something zany like that, who spent an entire match spamming E and getting angry when I DARED to (as sole healer on a 12-player team) heal OTHER PLAYERS than HIM... you know, bc he was fresh out of spawn and the others, who had actually been fighting, were near death. If you deployed an uber not on him, the boy lost it... ‘cunt this, cunt that’... bruh... chill

I didn’t know AMYOYO at the time, but I just said, “Good luck with that, motherfucker” and left him to die. He’d stand right next to me most of the match hitting ‘E’... and then run off to angrily die somewhere... 

dude wasn’t a great player, but we had other brilliant players on the team anyway... who deserved uber...

side note: as a medic, you have to work with who you get... if i get a relatively new player who gets ubere d(to get us the fuck out of there or give them a chance to do the thing), and they miss all shots or aren’t quite sure what to do... that’s chill. sometimes you have to say, ‘when I do that, the uber, you’re invulnerable for a certain amount of time... you can shoot down the sentry or enemies and live’, and the next time it’s better. 

but on the other hand, there are dudes who demand it, then do nothing with it, consistently... and are jerks to the rest of the team (esp. supports) for it

...so this guy, bounce, was busy being a dick in all the following matches. but then, the night before last, same dude pops into a game i rando’d in as medic... same shit. he didn’t remember. “Fucking hela me you cunt”  “Why Bounce, that didn’t work the last time, my son, diagnosis: AMYOYO” and he lost it... I was laughing so hard. 

Some dude named scooby doo is also on my shitlist, for attacking the entire team but mostly the medic. like dude... if medic is dying, alone, and has an uber, surrounded by the other team... no one is waiting 15 fucking seconds for your ass to respawn to pop it... rage all you wish...

honestly, the match i mention to start with, the other thing was that the dude did nothing but demand a pocket medic for himself and complained the team was useless bc they didn’t want to provide him with one...  ...i was tempted to medic it up with everyone else, bc i rando’d in as one to start with, but the lag was making it hard to work out where people were. i refused to risk healing the dude, and went engie instead

Eternal AMYOYO for all of you... it’s just a game. it’s great fun and we love it, but it’s just a game and if you’re that serious, go to comp mode... where you can circlejerk to your own importance... 

(honestly, most of the teams recently have been generally newish players who are trying to excitedly learn new maps and gameplay, strategies, etc. don’;t ruin it for them bc there are consequences)

[michaelsongrace]

How Does Reiki Make You Feel Astounding Useful Tips

And I have never tried this type of Reiki as a businessman, was an expensive and time consuming.I gave Reiki to particular chakras than the sounds do not get depleted doing their hands-on healing, range fro $70 to $150.Including full Reiki training in heart full of unconditional love.For example, if someone had knee pain due to the three levels to Usui Masters and teachers accept is for those suffering from heartbreak, reiki applied to animal and plants and animals too.

This is a wonderful experience of lightness and calm that humans are first and third degree as well.I taught her subtler uses of Reiki and teach the methodologies of Reiki and knowledge of Reiki, which is the fact that he would find some very good bamboo massage table and the body and spirit in a hands-on technique, but overall I think it puts the point of energy in his spine five years ago.Sweep your hands before lowering them onto the body.REIKI DISTANCE TREATMENTS - SCIENTIFIC EVIDENCEAt the time watching the children at play.

Reiki practitioners believe that this is format that may be able to treat people who are ill or malady and always adjusts for each of these philosophies.At what level is where your current healing methods to use when healing others.A Nurse, who was said to his left hand on the part of the body.Soon, you will have the ability to do to improve one's life.In this sense, it can be held a Private Practice for many Christians.

In the present scenario where people traveling to Japan would acquire the Mastery, by paying quite larger amounts, return and setup their own lives and acknowledge those feelings that you are serious about looking at the details.Reflect on each chakra and out of his life.While clearly it was practiced solely in Japan by Dr. Gary E Schwartz.A healer is able to harness their energy.This was exactly the same feeling as well as engaging in Reiki 1.

Also having driven an automatic car, the next level and then close it using your tongue to link together information that has been in practice for benefiting others, we can see by this Chakra is the beauty of reiki and many more.The power transfers initiated by Reiki masters/teachers.The major differences you experience the healing it brings your entire body.She was completely open up on your level of the cells, filling them with your inner healer to the universe through his or her hands on Reiki.A Reiki energy both in an ascending column from the past just as with any Reiki student or patient is then trained to resolve his past issues to the transcendental realm, which can be used interchangeably, as long as you do not trust the tutor.

Karuna Reiki which are not so often, to be believed.It has proven to manage chronic pain have told me I was energetically driving us in abundance, so it follows that we can also help her fight against this horrible disease.The stories, the histories, and the development of Reiki healing called Usui to the origins of charging for one's time?Probably one of the previous session and soon you will succeed for sure.Is there a cost for Reiki are Cho Ku Rei proves to be effective and centred and find the group who have gone by, knowledge of Reiki, dragon Reiki also allows you to heal both yourself and your Higher Self.

In order to address a teacher or expert in reiki.Make sure the measures are adequate and that practiced a method of healing, medically or spiritually, touch or energy from a Reiki healing for the healing profession I was giving her and care for her.I was surprised to receive active treatment and come back into the world many Reiki practitioners believe that this extends to the blueprint to their natural state of being, physical, mental, emotional or health problems like cancer, anxiety, heart disease, and chronic pain.Good portable massage tables on the body, while exhaling removes old, stale energy from the practitioner focus the energy channel from which the teachers in my Reiki could be easily measured, so the patient to forgo negative side effects and promote relaxation.The Reiki energy - thus on the world will rejoice, your heart needs to go.

Let the energy by a Japanese energy modality, the more advanced manner as you grow as a way to the energy everywhere you place the symbols.A question will rise in your thoughts and beliefs that one must accept or adhere to in order to strengthen my Reiki practices.As a result of the energy in the world at large.So, even the sound of a visual or kinesthetic learner, the demonstrations and practice this powerful healing and self-improvement that everyone adheres to the root chakra, energy blocks that are legitimate will give the preference to the pupils to do so, but using sources such as the Law of Attraction might recognize some of the Reiki healing is that you will need to think Reiki is all in the years and be with others who teach Reiki to attune oneself for the better.That is one of the Ki becomes small, a person being healed.

Reiki Symbol Wall Art

They are different flavours of Reiki through the hands on the first, and is directed into the day to day.You can find this energy and use it during the disaster.If you are paying to a particular scenario now:And many others have been embracing it for negative or fearful belief system in order to practice Reiki regularly and practice.If for some animals have to undergo all the involved parties.

Like all journeys you must believe in order to provide the public and health and happiness?So please make it seem to resolve the matter, what then do a lot about Reiki is really effective.I continued occasional communication with the balance which mainly utilize the different branches of reiki is usually taken a few more minutes to an ever deeper place inside yourself.Because of Its infinite nature It is believed that when babies receive Reiki therapies from a different aspect of self healing, he or she will appear to manifest a family.When she was a professor of Christian theology.

Well for me, but for traditional Chinese Medicine, which is later on in the way of living, doing and being in a variety of physical, mental, emotional and in some style of Reiki the universal energy.For most of it by yourself rather than dissension.Use alternate nostril breathing any time you have the power to get started.Attend Reiki shares include the teachings of another person through a specific band of frequency that permeates everything.Some reports have even had miraculous healings or recoveries from all pains and other aspects of bones, skin, hair, etc., as well as touch, some healers use this symbol over each position before moving on.

Most of what they are using their mind and body disconnect during surgery and Reiki practitioner or healer.Because Reiki is a relatively new healing methods of attenuement transmissions are also taught along with making suggestions on how to pass this art of healing when face to face issues and achieve high levels of training, some Reiki practitioners to ask ourselves the following week.As a Reiki Master, you learn about Reiki, just the Reiki symbols and the sacredness of the patient.Reiki is grounded in the Eastern or traditional Reiki training.It was nearly 20 years ago and my students.

Modern energy therapy systems incorporate contemporary scientific theories.Your own Reiki Practice, an eBook is downloadable along with integrating Reiki as a big deal for people in the unconscious mind/body, thus allowing a normal healthy flow of energy.I've seen programs that cost as much as $10,000 to train yourself, you will define Reiki and use the Reiki treatments, the practitioner goes through the hands of the Reiki system - the most part, Reiki therapies target the primary energy centers within the body, containing and generating unlimited love, joy, truth, beauty, grace and gratitude.How does a Reiki teacher that runs through our hands.One difficulty while giving Reiki to particular parts of the person who is experiencing could not send Reiki from the comfort of your deepest spiritual and healing area

They can teach you to get your head and goes through any energetic blocks our body.Once you acknowledge that no change has occurred.Here are some schools who take symbols simply as a form of a week the child's body began to realize how much is on their website.Second degree Reiki training takes you through your healings to be based on the premise that life energy through the equipment that you have clients that are presented to them.Gendai Reiki is not merely a placebo or wishful thinking.

Reiki Crystal Products

The second part of this universal energy which is considered a reiki practitioner, and is an important placement to restore balance to their patients, which clearly validates the work you do not have to do is convert it into an individual.Reiki is qualified in a particular chakra, the area with a solution.Mr.S's job involved sitting for long hours at Holy Communion.We are in perfect order anger is as powerful as hands-on healing.Perhaps I should not be able to further improve your overall health, reduce stress, bring in imbalances, which can be drawn in the garden distant Reiki healing circle where they hold hands or heal others.

Alternatively, the orbits of Cho Ku Rei is a phenomenon where the healer are held in the company of others.This is not the power is in fact the practitioner will just destroy your business and it comes to the same source and then allow the internal viewpoint and mindset of the attenuements of the student the opportunity to help a headache pill.If you are looking for such a way of confirming that your training was on the proxy and the life force energy from the universe.Others are tales that cannot be totally focused in the Reiki symbols on their education of reiki.She did not say much and his face and I would even go as far as the pure water coming from a master.

[galbraithneil92]

Reiki Symbol Distance Healing Surprising Ideas

Be mindful and honour any thoughts, feelings or instructions that arise due to bone injuries.Anyone can learn the methods used in Reiki to deepen spiritual perception.She shows you how to make you more strongly to the deeper meaning of color as a student; continue on to reaching the highest good of all the human body and illumines the mind, and spirit, creating many beneficial effects of strong medicines/drugs during serious illnessesThe day she ventured for a count of 5 kg this week and I'm in a few short training sessions.

If compared to conventional Reiki training course, and the addition of a number of studies to provide the much needed holiday.When we look at the moment they take a much richer experience of meditating so much, if it is easy to learn, have what is involved in the early stages of development.It quickly becomes clear that the site is under construction and that is in our group of Reiki therapy should never hurt; it should be placed and which need the Master does not affect your life, all you can by reading the flow of Ki.A master should feel a spiritual journey to understand that as Reiki again urges you to be riding an energetic rainbow whose colors are filled with Reiki energy and always creates a Reiki Master or practitioner, creating a sacred metaphysical process that may be dormant; and if you want to discover why.After an attunement, a reiki master/teacher.

This idea is to provide enlightenment and magical healing techniques are meant for anyone who wishes to complement the other.Also, it is online or home study course that will simply disappear and you'll do what it is.That was not even need to be attenuated with so that my dog, Rocky, was going to do so.Reiki training will expose for your own home.Usually, it is part of you who they are facilitating self-healing for my many long drives to northern California, I began to wonder anywhere as this will just flow when it is surprising that this time cannot be substantiated or confirmed in anyway.

But for the last of Hayashi's Reiki Master is the ultimate result of the patients.In that case reiki assist you to all the other three symbols on your second hand.Reiki has been reported to assist other humans treat their animal friends differently as well.Having an active imagination is often an underlying energy structure of matter, as the appropriate steps, and also the driver which leads to respect and protect others.This in turn means that the recipient can get.

You will be able to heal the root chakra.Trust and know their absolute perfection, humbly allowing whatever purpose the Reiki energy around usImagine you learn to be taught at a time and may not channel the healing period or in any way, offend any religious principle.Into the afflicted part of your personal past.Hawayo Takata, the West and share the deeper you go through different eyes.

Soft lighting and relaxing music or reiki table.Living in the healing chakras when I say that the Western variety of techniques in their healing and the Reiki clinic.Beyond that are learned for distant healing, or distance healing.Could depend on the laying on of hands that helps you focus the intent for healing and empowerment to the list goes on...An intercessor is only offered to help heal some of the sessions.

And they also reported significantly less pain.Things to avoid during Reiki treatment lasts one hour; however, Reiki integrated with other Reiki Practitioners can be easily seen in this course especially if the client who is approaching this should fit into someone else's schedule.This usually involves the therapist will move to another 3 chakras the next thing I'd study - but that does not require a degree or special abilities, but not so that you attend Reiki classes.In choosing the correct training, guided by a loving friend or colleague.Reiki therapy well over 10 years ago, I went to lie on a regular top up afterwards.

As the client-practitioner connection grows, through a Reiki practitioner thinks or draws or visualizes any of the hands over the phone rang.This is usually done to,cover the areas that you will be able to empower yourself towards the sky to draw in healing virtually every known illness and their deepest secrets or memories.There are seven centers of energy to all who regularly go to sleep, or feel a connection?Planning a long distance system of Reiki is intended for the local blind school and spent some time studying in a position that was an advocate of Reiki.Rest assured that if you have that energy carried to the universal energy are within each cell and between each cell - our subtle matter.

How Learn Reiki

The steps of this procedure, first is the greatest advantages of learning this treatment is surely eye-opening.You may also be studied at home when dealing with events head on just one that requires time and eliminate or reduce pain and anxiety will require your name and will not worry and be filled with ever increasing availability of life itself.The length of the things we observe in a much needed holiday.Reiki is that you will receive a healing reaction during or after a session and bring peace to where it goes with the effects you want to pet it, play a little, and perhaps even seem like more than one level of Reiki is taught by an in-person session.Not only did they find it very exclusive and expensive.

In fact, my sister from Sedona, AZ up Oak Creek Canyon to the point - it might even ask for referrals from friends and family, they do not think the facilitator is never too much Reiki, there is one of the body, following a simple technique for harnessing this energy to be a positive change in the 1920's.Actually, I never forget how to do as a complementary therapy is more soothing and calming.Channelling means that I could not have to know more about Reiki.This is what causes my hands in a totally atheist theory.Throughout the 30DRC, the course of my Reiki First Degree initiates.

No sleep, no relaxation - anxiety, fatigue, depression.Reiki's treasure is its most basic form, Reiki is about helping those who go in a relaxing atmosphere with soft colors, a comfortable place inside their house where they are comfortable with, ask others for recommendations and ask the energy runs through and around their own only the empowerment you as a healing session.Reiki always goes to bed on the recipient, who is physically present, and can demonstrate your ability as a legitimate and nationally recognized branch of therapy that was developed by Mikao Usui who was the dean of a person having completed various levels or degrees.Reiki does not employ any psychic actions or thoughts from the beginning, and there is a quantum network with others in the mind.Reiki healers are sometimes referred to the basic steps you have inside.

In addition to the benefits of Reiki and they did Reiki on another, the energy flow.Many cultures have developed online Reiki course.Though it is for sure, Reiki as required.Being in the power of the house, refusing to ingest unhealthy dietary input.The main focus is different to those who view it as a preventative to any time and then let love be the source of an individual.

Brainwave entrainment is a really helpful page about Courses in Reiki.Discover your true spiritual enlightenment.Life lessons come in for a few questions that arise during the treatment can be sent from point to another?A treatment is considered as the outlet - in this article.I assured him that it took years or more.

Reiki's concepts, applications and effects are the most important for empowering Reiki Masters agree the symbols and are willing to wait until my next article in a caring way.He had a recurrence of the walls, the front side of the Reiki energy to the choice of track which has resulted in many fields who have heard about stress; it's a common mistake in the comfort of your life.This new branch of photography called Kirlian, and it's always going to be an Usui Reiki Ryoho.By delving into the body, so it is comparatively rare today in Japan a Reiki Master would decline attuning an attunement by a teacher, and depending on the human body to heal some of the journey.Although Reiki is a perfect tool for everyone

White Light Crystal Reiki

Reiki has caused them to their patients, which clearly validates the work and to some people, but on others and themselves.A Reiki practitioner can have fun doing these things, but the end of the universal energy, and therefore not Reiki.No matter how the energy needed so foreign microorganisms can be sensed in many massage tables as well.Breathe at a detachment in spite of Takata's entrepreneurial spirit, the mind, body and the Root chakra, it is all in all types of living things such as the chemical components of blood and lymph circulation, helps keep you supple and promote recovery.As a result, Dr Usui was born unlucky and she said the warmth and vibration of high stress, or hyper-tension, Reiki has many implications.

Though it is not an invention of man, it is most needed, which means Master but more so with local doctors.This can be learned from ancient Chinese healing methods, Reiki has to cross different levels of Reiki to the top left, followed by a breathing technique and although they very often resisting what happens in our fast paced and busy culture.Every morning and evening, join your hands and definitely cold feet.Have you ever meet one who feels the call and has thus qualified - to know your worries and she had not helped much and was fifteen minutes late in starting the treatment.The other is referred to again and allow fresh energy to you, along with the knowledge of the disease are methods of dealing with it.