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a-duck-with-a-book · 4 years ago

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REVIEW // Nevernight (The Nevernight Chronicle, #1) by Jay Kristoff

★☆☆☆☆

So I’m very late to the party, but I just finished reading Nevernight by Jay Kristoff I had such high hopes for this series based off of what people recommending it had told me and what I read about it before picking up. Dark fantasy? Check. Strong leading lady? I’m here for it. Gays? It’s literally my only personality trait. Sign me up. Unfortunately, this book fell flat in all those categories. It reminded me a lot of Sarah J. Maas’s Throne of Glass, which made me take one point off of to begin with simply for making me think of Maas’s writing. Overall, I just found the book to be too predictable, with bad writing, exposition, and pacing, and too many parts that just made me ~uncomfortable~.

In case you are not familiar with this novel, Nevernight tells the story of Mia Corvere, a girl who lost her family when she was a child after her father was convicted of treason. When the book begins, she is 16 years old and embarking on a journey to join the Red Church, a school for assassins, so that she may one day be able to avenge her father’s death. Along the way she meets a bunch of forgettable characters whose names I can’t be bothered to remember and is taught by the most fearsome killers in the Republic. Here she gains many valuable skills, like how to survive being poisoned, how to fight, and how to get big boobs.

+ Side note: by chapter 3 three I started picturing Mia as the crow guy from RWBY and I could not shake that for the rest of the book

I had many issues with this novel that I will try to summarize in some sort of coherent fashion, but to be honest this book sucked the will to live out of me so I don’t know how much energy I can put into this review.

// image: official cover art by Jason Chan //

FOOTNOTES

The footnotes were probably the most jarring element of the book for me, and, unfortunately, there’s a lot of them. Their function seems to be twofold:

they are the form of most of the world-building, explaining several customs, the history of the institutions and peoples Mia meets, and the mythology followed by the people of the Republic.

they allow for the narrator of our story to interrupt with comical one-liners or cryptic foreshadowing

In my humble opinion, both of these are unnecessary and stupid. The interruptions come off as crass and immature and make the other more textbook, boring exposition come off as a joke, especially when it is dealing with sensitive or serious topics. There is one that explains this brothel called the Seven Flavors, which the footnote explains refer to “Boy, Girl, Man, Woman, Pig, Horse, and, if sufficient notice and coin was given, Corpse.” Now, on its own, this passing mention of pedophilia, bestiality, and necrophilia could very well contribute to the world building and tone of the novel, but when placed side by side with the childish, joking tone of the “cue the violiiiiiiiins” or, regarding the acoustics of a room, “…they were, as it happens, exceptional. Falalalalalalaaaaaaaa”, come off as way too light-hearted for the topic at hand. Maybe I’m being way too sensitive, but I’m pretty tired of authors using serious topics as off-hand remarks as a lazy way to make their world daker and grittier. Plus, these footnotes were just so incredibly cringy that I would recoil from second-hand embarrassment every time. They resemble the things I wrote when I was 14 and trying (and miserably failing) to be funny. Also… there are way too many of them. While at first I appreciated the attempt to deepen the lore of the story (I’m a sucker for world-building), after a while it became evident that the author was just forcing information down our throats without taking the time to actually weave the lore and background into the story itself. It came off as a very lazy way to force exposition.

OVERLY FLOWERY LANGUAGE

This story is BRIMMING with similes and metaphors, like every other sentence is some overly complicated way to describe something that could have been presented in three words. When you include so many metaphors/similes/etc., they begin to lose power. They should allow the reader to extrapolate more meaning and emotion from a sentence, but if the book is bursting at the seams with them, they become increasingly ordinary, to the point of losing all of their luster. One prime example appears on page 30:

“It was a bucktoothed little shithole, and no mistake. Not the most miserable building in all creation. [here there is a footnote about some other inn/brothel] But if the inn were a man and you stumbled into him in a bar, you’d be forgiven for assuming he had—after agreeing enthusiastically to his wife’s request to bring another woman into their marriage bed—discovered his bride making up a pallet for him in the guest room.”

So first of all what the fuck is that supposed to mean? That whole paragraph is a fever dream. Let’s begin with “bucktoothed little shithole”. Bucktoothed? Really? What does that mean. Please, someone explain to be right now what a bucktoothed building is. Is it uneven? Is it awkward? Is it half-finished? Is one side longer than the other? Did they do a bad paint job that only covers on side? Are the windows askew? Is the door too big for its frame? We already know from the paragraph above that it is “disheveled” as well, so why the need for another weird phrasing of its appearance? We then move on to that whole JOURNEY of a sentence, where the inn is compared to a man being cuckolded. That is the most insane tale-can you imagine running into someone in a bar and that story being the VERY FIRST thing that runs through your mind??? I know I’m focusing way too much on this stupid paragraph, but basically what I am trying to get at is that even though we spend half a page talking about how bucktoothed and disheveled and cuckolded this building is, we get no actual physical description of it. Imagine if Kristoff had just written that it was a run-down, ill-kept building that looked as worse for wear as its owner did. Done, one sentence. Great. Let’s move on. Instead, we spend so long reading these absolutely batshit descriptions that ultimately tell us next to nothing. Flowery language is placed over actual context. You may think that a description this long and complex means that this inn is a significant or recurring setting in the novel. Nope. It’s not. Mia leaves and that’s that. The reason that I’m focusing so much on this objectively irrelevant paragraph is because it is so representative of the biggest issue I have with the writing in this book. There are so many unnecessary comparisons that function only to make the author feel clever rather than add anything to the story at all. It’s very à la 2010s Tumblr.

THE (IN MY OPINION, BAD) WRITING

For the first half of the book, we are constantly being TOLD things rather than being SHOWN things. With the exception of one of the teachers cutting off Mia’s arm, we rarely see the ruthlessness that the assassins are so feared for, but we hear about it in nearly every other sentence Where are the consequences? I think this book would have been way more enjoyable if there were actually consequences to the characters’ actions. The inclusion of the weaver and the weird vampire guy completely remove any tension regarding the fate of the central cast. When Mia had her arm chopped off, I was shocked, and pleasantly surprised. How was she going to overcome this unexpected obstacle in her training? Then a couple pages later, its reattached with absolutely no lasting consequences. All of the initial tension and shock value of the loss of Mia’s arm is entirely removed because of the two incest-y siblings. Their entire purpose for existing is just to undo all damage to the main characters. Then suddenly, out of the blue, Mia is willing to take on a ton of consequences and completely throw away her chance at becoming initiated in order to avenge her family just to save Tric from receiving like one punishment??? Like why?? As an aside, the only moment I truly enjoyed was when Ash fucking stabbed Tric to death. I assume that when the reader’s favorite moment is one of the central characters’ death, it does not bode well for their reception of the book.

THE THEMES

TW: rape-y subjects

The author seemed a little too keen to include rape and sexual assault in his story. Mia withdrew her consent in the sex scene in the very first chapter, and even if you read it as consensual (which I do not), it is described as incredibly unpleasant on her end. Tric is the result of a rape, which is brought up several times throughout the story. Further, Mia is constantly facing harassment from men. I understand that this is frames the idea that the world she lives in is misogynistic and ruthless, but there are other ways to push that idea through other than constantly putting in her in those situations. As in, this didn’t need to be the ONLY way we explored this subject. Beyond the uncomfortable propensity for sexual assault, I also very much disliked the sexualization of the 16-year-old main character. Oh. My. Gosh. Mia is CONSTANTLY sexualized. Every single damn character makes comments about her body, how hot she is, how much sex she potentially has. It is so weird and uncomfortable. I feel the need to reiterate that she is SIXTEEN. There is, however, a focus placed on the power Mia can gain from seducing her targets. Girl power? Not to me, really. The issue I have with this is the idea that a woman has to be overtly sexual in order to be considered powerful. This is something that we can see in many female assassins and supposedly powerful female characters in fiction (like Black Widow) especially those written by men. Now, there is nothing wrong with using one’s sexuality as a weapon, and I’m certainly not saying that a strong female character cannot be sexual, but the idea that a sixteen-year-old girl is shown having her body painfully modified tp be more desirable, and in a graphic sex scene with another character, in order to for the reader to read her as liberated and powerful does not sit well with me. I don’t really feel like this aspect of her training should be relevant to the overall story. I wish the time that Kristoff had dedicated to hammering into our heads that Mia is a femme fatale to developing her Darkin powers instead. The way she is written now feels more like she is a faux strong female character written for a male audience.

Secondly, Mia is fully written as “the plain-girl-who-is-actually-pretty”. This whole trope bothers me IMMENSELY. YA is full of girls who are described as plain, forgettable, or ugly while their physical descriptions are just the dictionary definition of conventionally attractive. It seems like a way to market off of girls’ self-consciousness while still being able to market the main character as a hot heroine in official art. And there is, of course, the issue of Mia’s boob job Readwithcindy (just ��withcindy” now!) did a whole video about this so I won’t get into it much just to repeat what she already said, but I agree that the idea of a 30-something year old man including this completely unnecessary detail regarding the sexualization of teenage girl, who we have ALREADY seen in a rape and being sexualized by other men in the story, made me really, really, uncomfortable. I highly recommend you go watch her video, as she touches on this in way more detail. [Cindy's video

RATINGS

Worldbuilding: ★★☆☆☆

A lot of thought obviously went into the world-the mythology, society, and politics are well-thought out. But the way they are introduced is annoying and bland. It seems like the author put a lot of effort into constructing this world but realized a lot of it would be left out of the book, so he crammed it into footnotes instead.

Tone and writing style: ★☆☆☆☆ for first half, ★★★☆☆ for second half

The tone of the first half is all over the place, like it doesn’t know if it should be dark and gritty or comical and immature. Footnotes and character dialogue ranges from lighthearted and crass to seeped with themes of torture and sexual assault. It is jarring, to say the least, and often feels like the author doesn’t take these ideas of rape or violence seriously. There are so many instances where the scene is tense or gritty, and Kristoff is actually writing it pretty well, I’m enthralled and on the edge of my seat, and then Mia or some other character (or the footnotes) throw in some stupid comment or make the same “Mia is such an asshole lol” joke for the billionth time and completely ruin the mood of that scene. The second half of the book moved much faster and was helped with way better writing, but it really did not do enough to make up for the horrendous structure of the first half of the book.

Pacing and structure: ★☆☆☆☆

The first half of the book really drags on. Once we arrive at the school, there are constant jumps in timeline, marked with periods when a thousand things happen all at once and the plot moves forward at a dizzying rate, and others when the characters just seem to be going about their daily lessons.

Concept: ★★★☆☆

I found the overall idea of the books to be very interesting, even though it is certainly not the most original or unique concept for a YA fantasy book. The issue is that the potential is squandered with a poor execution.

Characters: ★☆☆☆☆

I truly did not care about any of the characters. The token mean girl, the bumbling nice-guy-who-is-definitely-the-love-interest. too many of the characters just sat nicely within their tropes, doing nothing much to pique my interests. I think my favorite overall was Mister Kindly.

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darisu-chan · 4 years ago

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whatever our souls are made of (his and mine are the same), pt. 2

Hi!

Welcome back to the second one-shot in this collection.

I hope you guys like it!

You can also read it here.

See you guys tomorrow!

to be (the man in your heart)

Prompt: fantasy vs reality

Summary: Everybody sees Ichigo the way they want to see him. But only Rukia sees him whole.

“Today we’re going to talk about the hero’s journey,” the professor drawls out one cloudy August morning, ignorant of the blank stares and yawning coming from his students. He probably thinks he’s being engaging enough, completely unaware that he has already lost his students.

Even Ichigo feels lost before the introduction.

He would probably have paid more attention if he hadn’t felt so drowsy.

Then again, it’s barely eight am on a Friday.

And he doesn’t know precisely why, but lately it has been hard to focus on anything more than a couple of minutes. He hopes this doesn’t get reflected on his grades though. He doesn’t need a repeat of his less than stellar grades the last year and a half of high school.

He can’t help but curse himself for choosing to attend an early morning class.

Although it’s not like it is entirely his fault.

By all means, this class was supposed to be engaging. Or at least Ichigo had been excited to take it when he had enrolled in a course about folktales, particularly Western ones. The purpose of this class is not only to study tales from European cultures, but to analyze them according to different approaches and literary theories. As someone majoring in English Literature, this class had seemed essential and Ichigo had not hesitated to take it. Now he realizes it is less about the folktales and more about the theory of what makes something a story.

Which is not really what he had wanted to study. But… can’t do anything about it now.

There have been only two other classes, as it is the beginning of the semester. They haven’t really done much so far, but today, they are apparently starting with the basics. This means they are studying the monomyth, also known as the hero’s journey, a way to categorize stories featuring heroes. Because in most folktales, heroes are the protagonists of stories, and everyone else is just someone there to help the hero or to oppose them.

(Ichigo hates this idea)

“But before we start, can anybody tell me what a hero is?” The professor asks, interrupting his lecture and startling his sleepy students.

Have we mentioned that Ichigo hates heroes?

It is definitely too early in the morning to think in general, much less about such a contrived term. But yet, here he is. In this class he himself had chosen to take. Past Ichigo had been such an idiot, huh?

Before he can continue down this line, a girl suddenly raises her hand, distracting him from his musings.

“Yes, Yamada-san?” The professor calls her.

“A hero is the person who saves the day in a story.” She obediently recites, as if she had memorized her answer before saying it out loud.

Ichigo can’t help but roll his eyes at her.

But of course the goody-two-shoes of the class would give the most basic of definitions.

Because that is the only thing heroes are good for.

Saving the day, as if that was their purpose, their whole life, who they are.

Saviors.

(Ichigo hates this idea)

“Yes, in very broad terms, you’re correct, Yamada-san.” The professor says in such a dismissing way that stops Yamada from preening any further. “However, what is the essence of a hero? What makes him any different to other characters?” He asks again, prompting his students to elaborate more on their answers.

Another student raises his hand.

“That he’s the protagonist of the tale.”

“Right, Uehara-san. He or she is the protagonist in most stories. But that is just a characteristic within the story. What I am asking is what makes a hero, well, the hero? What is it that makes a person act heroic?”

Ichigo cannot help but snort.

In hindsight, maybe he shouldn’t have, because that makes the teacher focus all his attention on him.

“Ah. Kurosaki-san, do you know the answer to the question?” The professor seems to ask almost mockingly.

Ichigo bits his lip.

Because, try as he might to hide it, he knows what is it the professor is asking, probably better than anyone in the room, even the professor himself.

“Selflessness.” He replies at length. “A willingness to sacrifice everything just to protect someone else.”

The professor excitedly moves his head up and down. “Yes! Thank you, Kurosaki-san. The reason heroes are saviors is because they are selfless!”

And he continues on with his lecture, talking about heroes, villains, monsters and damsels in distress, but Ichigo is no longer paying attention.

Ichigo hates heroes.

Well, not heroes per se, but the idea of them.

Selfless and protective and smart and charismatic and just plain good.

They don’t seem human.

There are human qualities in them, of course, but there is also something entirely unrealistic about them.

Because nobody is perfectly good all the time.

Where are the bad qualities?

Where’s the ugly in heroes?

He cannot find it.

Which is why Ichigo prefers the protagonists of tragedies.

None of Shakespeare’s heroes are ever, well heroic. Not even in comedies.

There is always something beautifully damaged about all of them.

A tragic flaw, it is called.

That singular defect which unleashes the tragedy.

You might say that it is that which ends up biting them in the ass.

For Othello, it was his jealousy.

For Macbeth, his ambition.

For Hamlet, his inaction.

And for Ichigo, it is his own weakness.

Because that is what, in fact, almost destroyed not only his world, but the entire universe as every being knows it.

Nobody blames him, of course, because in his reality, he is the hero of the story. And he hates it. Every part of it. How he can become blameless of everything even when he had caused it or had failed to stop it.

And he doesn’t think of himself as such.

A hero, that is.

Though everyone sees him this way, from his sisters in all of their innocence, to his friends, to the whole Soul Society.

Why do they keep praising him when they had almost died because of him?

Why do they hail him as a hero when the danger is not over, when, if he even dares to be happy, that demon of a man is going to come back to destroy them all?

Ichigo doesn’t get it.

Heroes don’t really exist in real life.

And the heroes in all stories have to be perfect, or else how are they even good?

It’s a load of shit.

Ichigo is not a hero, as he protects people out of his own selfishness.

Because, deep down, he doesn’t want to feel alone.

Because he wants all of his loved ones to be safe and happy.

And that’s it.

That’s the reason.

But others don’t see it that way.

They see him exactly as all the heroes in tales.

All good and strong and able to overcome anything that gets in his way without giving up.

A prince charming.

A guardian angel.

But he’s just...not any of those things.

And he’s done trying to live up to their expectations.

It was easier when he was fifteen, to go along with whatever they wanted him to be.

So he acted happy when around his sisters and father, even though he was still carrying all the weight of the guilt of his mother’s death.

It seemed easier, back then, to try to appear unaffected by that and all the little things, like the bullying he had suffered due to his hair color.

And at school, he had tried to be just another guy who just happened to have brightly colored hair.

His friends knew this Ichigo. And not to say he was a phony, but he wasn’t all himself either.

He never showed them the scars scattered all around his soul for fear they would leave him behind.

Because who could ever love someone as hideous as he?

(Someone who had caused his own mother’s death)

But t had gotten better for a while.

When he had become a Shinigami and had known the strength of carrying a zanpakutō and all that comes with that power.

However, he had just as quickly learned that such power came with the responsibility of not just protecting his loved ones, but anyone, really.

That he couldn’t just stand still while others needed his help.

He needed to do better.

And so, he had tried really hard to become the kind of person that was deserving of that power.

Ichigo had become so good at it that others had bought it, especially after his first true test.

What had followed had been months and months of trying to prove he was as heroic as others saw him.

Because not only did the Soul Society see him as one, but also his closest friends, who, even though had seen him fall, still thought of him as a savior.

And that weighted on him even more.

He started wondering if, after so many battles fought together, they saw the true Ichigo or the mask he wore.

It was only after the last war, when he had so utterly failed and they had still given him praise, that he had found the answer.

Chad and Inoue and Renji and, hell, even Byakuya, lived in a fantasy where he was always strong and would power through everything. That he truly never failed.

Even Ishida was sometimes guilty of that.

(After Yhwach was defeated, saying he had won, as if it hadn’t been Ishida who had done him in)

They all congratulated him, patted him on the back, and happily resumed their lives because Ichigo had won again. He had defeated yet another villain and thus they could live their lives in peace.

But all he had wanted to do was scream.

He had been defeated over and over by the Quincy King, and the only reason he wasn’t a threat anymore was because Ishida had been there to deliver the final blow. And even then, absolutely no one was sure if he was gone for good.

And the reason why was because Ichigo had been weak.

If he had had true strength, he would have been able to win for sure.

And this doubt wouldn’t be eating him away.

Now every night, before going to bed, even two years after the war had been won, Ichigo still repeats Yhwach’s threat like a broken record.

During his happiest moment, the Quincy King will come back to kill him and destroy everything, according to his plan.

The thought terrifies him.

To think he had failed them all, because at any moment, Yhwach might come back, and it will be it for the universe.

He’s no hero.

No savior.

Because even if the Soul Society hasn’t said so, he knows they are all still in danger, and it all depends on his happiness.

And Ichigo is selfish.

He could have sacrificed that promise of happiness for everybody’s sake. Yet he still holds onto it and is unwilling to let go.

He’s not the person they all expected him to be.

And that weighs on him.

(If only he was as heroic as his mother─)

“Hey, Ichigo! Welcome back!”

It is Rukia who distracts him from his dark thoughts as he opens his bedroom door and finds her already there, having come over for the weekend as she has done for the past few months.

And for the first time in the day, he smiles.

“Hey.” He greets her, letting his bag drop on the floor, and joining her on his bed.

“How was university today? What did you learn?” Rukia asks him excitedly, and he can’t stop his lips from quirking up at how adorable she is, wanting to learn about college through him.

“Kinda boring.” He shrugs, content to just observe her as she raises an eyebrow at him.

“Why? What did you study?”

“We talked about heroes.” He answers her, moving up his head to appreciate the way her skin glows in this lighting.

“Heroes?” She scrunches her nose like a bunny.

“Yeah. Like in tales and stuff.”

“Oh right.”

Then they fall into a comfortable silence as they are wont to do. Ichigo takes his time to delight himself in the image she delivers. And as she is all light and white and pureness, he remembers a piece of memory he keeps close at heart ─the one and only time he has felt like a true hero.

There’s fire and a will and a promise.

And in the midst of all, there’s Rukia and her big doe eyes staring right at him as if he were a miracle.

“Yo!”

I remember now… the reason why I wanted to save you so much.

“Hey, Rukia.” He suddenly calls out to her.

“Yeah?”

“Do you think I’m a hero?”

She snorts and flicks his forehead. “Nope.”

“Hey!” He rubs his assaulted head, but is more intrigued by her answer.

“I mean… we could say you are… but you’re more… you know…” She gesticulates towards him.

“Uhu.”

“You’re Ichigo.” Rukia says at last.

He thinks he understands it then.

Because if there is one person in this world that has seen him at his best and worst and has still got him, is Rukia.

She is the only one to have ever seen him whole.

And even when she knows about all his failings, she still has the capability to hold him in high esteem.

Because for her, Ichigo is who he is and so much more.

“Thanks, Rukia.” He says with more emotion than he probably should have, but it is worth it when she beams at him.

“That’s my line.”

Ichigo still hates heroes.

Probably will always do.

But for Rukia, he thinks he might be able to become a little bit more heroic.

To be less selfish.

To be the man he is in her heart.

To be a little more like she is.

#ichiruki #ichirukimonth #ichirukimonth2020 #ichiruki fanfiction #my fanfiction

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hotpodsummer · 3 years ago

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REVEALS ARE HERE

Hello! Now that reveals are over, a masterpost of all of the gorgeous new fic! Thank you to everyone who posted in this exchange, commented, left kudos. You really made this exchange come alive!

And By a Sleep, to Say We End the Heartache by laceblade for Srw

No summary. (Ronan/Tommy)

And they were roommates?! by catpennies for bigpunktapes (biggayghost)

Lovett was not supoosed to have roommates. This was not the plan. (Jon F/Tommy, Jon F/Jon L/Tommy)

Are You Writing Your Vows? We Don't Even Have A Date Yet. by Srw for Moreanswers24

Ronan thinks that he's going to get a head start on writing his vows. (Ronan/Jon L)

But maybe we're the same by thetimesinbetween for swishandflick

"One sec," Lovett says, already tapping at his phone. "Let me ask Ronan if he’s all right with me offering to let you drink from the source, or if he aiming for us to be, like, super super exclusive to the point where no other man can touch me."

Tommy opens his mouth, but Lovett is already hitting send.

Tommy's phone buzzes. Lovett has renamed their groupchat “bloodbag?” (Ronan/Jon L, Ronan/Jon L/Tommy)

close enough to touch by somehowunbroken for HereWeAreAtTheEnd

They come together naturally, and when it all finally clicks—well, Tommy's pretty sure it's going to be amazing.(Jon L/Jon F/Tommy)

come do a friendly thing by kenopsia (indie) for catpennies

Lovett shrugged. “I think it probably would have been a lot of fun to see Tommy’s face if he walked in on us in a four way post coital cuddle instead of coming back to change early enough to spook us sober. But it’s not like I still… think about it.”

“Clearly,” Emily said. She pulled her legs up to sit on her feet, feeling chilly suddenly. “Since neither of us are here thinking about it.”

(Ronan/Jon L/Emily/Jon F)

Despite the heat it'll be alright by okaystop for fizzy_smile

It was hot. (Jon L/Tommy)

A Fitting Room for Changing by SelfRescuingPrincess for laceblade

He's been holding onto these more-than-a-best-friend feelings for over a decade and a half but it always seems not quite right to verbalize anything specific. He second guesses himself and makes “Dear Diary” jokes instead because self-deprecation is safer. Or he straight up talks himself out of it because at this point it's been so long, and what would he even say? And what would Tommy say? What if he ruined everything? Realistically, Lovett should probably say something before he self-combusts, except the thought of losing Tommy- and the potential professional fallout- is ultimately unfathomable. Unbearable. Unimaginable. So, he’ll forget it. Bury it. (Jon L/Tommy)

Hallmark Moments by Moreanswers24 for celli

Hallmark and Lifetime wish that they could write a relationship as captivating as the one between Jon Favreau and Emily Black.

But if Emily has her way, Hallmark and Lifetime are going to want to write about another relationship instead.

College AU. Pre-JonJon (Emily & Jon F, pre Jon F/Jon L)

here i am, rock you like a hurricane by fizzy_smile for ruthvsreality

What is with that devilish glint in Dan's blue eyes? (Jon L/Dan)

home is wherever i'm with you by moonlitelupines for Laliandra

He turns to Tommy and suddenly it’s the easiest thing in the world to lean in and place a kiss on his lips. Lovett hasn’t let himself think about kissing Tommy, a fact true even before he met Ronan. It felt like he was tempting fate by indulging in the fantasy. Because Lovett was sure that’s all it was ever going to be.

But, this isn’t fantasy. This is real.

~ Or, how an earthquake and a questionably functional elevator help Lovett, Ronan, and Tommy see what's been in front of them all along. (Ronan/Jon L, Ronan/Jon L/Tommy)

i want you to love me/i have everything i wanted by tealwall for waronchairs

“I want to. Even if we don’t hit it off romantically, it would still be nice to third-wheel with you on the boys’ date.” (Jon F/Tommy, Emily/Hanna, Hanna/Tommy, Emily/Jon F)

No before, you are all I can see by swishandflick for kenopsia (indie)

As fall rapidly swallows the last vestiges of summer, Lovett prepares to leave, and Tommy desperately tries to hold on. (Jon L/Tommy)

No One Knows Where They Belong by celli for whenlifehandsyou

Jon and Emily are in love with someone else.

Lovett's going to figure out who it is. (Emily/Jon F/Jon L)

perfect use of an imperfect medium by earnestbros (departureboard) for hopefor46

Human sexuality is complex! Lovett pleads with himself as he adds chips and guacamole to his order. There’s an entire universe between what you find theoretically hot and what you actually want to happen to your physical body.

Lovett stumbles across Jon's porn search history, and he can't help but notice how much of it is Lovett-and-Tommy-adjacent. (Jon F/Jon L/Tommy)

Reach out and touch someone by hopefor46 for moonlitelupines

Sometimes, middle school math teacher Jon Lovett's teachable moments are best suited for himself. (Jon L/Tommy)

Save Up All the Days by Laliandra for thetimesinbetween

What you’re supposed to do is let your marker touch it, spend some time in each other’s company and let whatever strange energy that has connected you settle, find out what kind of mark effects you have, if it feels like something that could become a bond.

What Lovett does is dig out his one long sleeved henley and go to bed. (Jon L/Jon F/Tommy)

Shine a little light on me by whenlifehandsyou for tealwall

It's been a real long pandemic. The foursome is finally alone together again after over a year apart. There's a lot of sex and feelings to catch up on. (Ronan/Emily/Jon F/Jon L)

Take Me Out to the Ball Game by HereWeAreAtTheEnd for okaystop

When Lovett was growing up, he had always dreamed of playing professional baseball for the New York Yankees. Who knew a 5’7 jewish kid from Long Island would end up an MLB catcher? In spite of the antisemitism he faced and keeping his sexuality hidden, Lovett found dear friends in the Major Leagues, including Boston Red Sox catcher Tommy Vietor.

When the Yankees and Mets face off at a 3 game series at Fenway Park, Lovett is introduced to team captain and star pitcher Jon Favreau. Can Lovett look past Favereau's polished all-American persona or will his initial distrust and the Yankees/Red Sox rivalry keep him from finding something that could change everything? (Jon F/Jon L, Past Ronan/Jon L, Past Tommy/Jon F)

there's a spark in you by somehowunbroken for alotofthingsdifferent

As it turns out, finding out you have a soulmate is nothing like it is in the movies. (Jon L/Dan)

this is our place, we make the rules by Sonni89 for earnestbros (departureboard)

Sometimes it takes a truly ridiculous game to realize you’re all in love. Or, life’s fundamental question: can you gay chicken the gay one? (Jon L/Tommy/Jon F)

with the assist by bitterbeets (ginnydear), ginnydear for SelfRescuingPrincess

Lovett loses a bet and has to wear a Lakers jersey all day. It causes quite the response. (Jon L/Tommy/Jon F)

You Matter to Me by waronchairs for ginnydear

Five times Tommy and Lovett engage in non-sexual intimacy, and one time they don't. (Tommy/Jon L)

#podsa #hot pod summer #masterlist

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darth-salem-emperor-of-earth · 4 years ago

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Not to my surprise, I’m on the late side with my first entry for @naruto-fantasy-week but better late than never, as they say (let’s see if I can actually produce my six other planned fanfics for this event. XD). But I was dying to write a soulmate/soul bond AU and this prompt offered the chance to me on a silver platter. I had a lot of fun with this story and had to find a decent place to stop because my brain kept churning with ideas to make this oneshot even longer to the point I should save this concept for later and either explain on it with a sequel or a multi fic. I did a little editing but it was mainly looking out for typos, misspellings, or missing words. Hopefully, I got them all or most of the mistakes. Happy reading! <3

If anyone is curious, the title for this fanfic “Our Two Souls Destined to Be” are lyrics from the song “Until Eternity” by Blackbriar.

Summary: Soulmates, soul bonds, whatever you call them, they were deemed special. But not to Neji. It didn’t matter who he was bonded to, for the main family would never allow him to find his true soulmate. Naruto Fantasy Week, Day 1. Prompt: Soul Bonds. [Neji x Sakura]

Flashback

Thoughts

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“He is half of my soul, as the poets say.”

― The Song of Achilles, Madeline Miller

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Every shinobi village treated soul bonds with care but they all had their own ways to manage how these destined people found each other. In Konoha, soul bonds were celebrated and considered a thing of beauty but the village leaders, even the Hokage himself, left the clans alone in their decision regarding the treatment of soulmates, even if it meant the clan heads would tear the soulmates apart for their own agenda. The Uchiha and Hyuga clans were particularly known for this, especially in the branch Hyuga family.

Neji was no stranger to how little of a chance the branch family would have in being allowed to meet and marry their soulmate. Unless their bond directed them to a civilian or another branch member, they were demanded to ignore such signs and tether themselves to the person of the main family’s choosing. His father had no such choice in the matter and neither would Neji. And he already knew what color eyes his soulmate would have.

Neji's father, Hyuga Hizashi, regarded him curiously when the four-year-old asked him what color the grass and leaves on the tree was. He glanced at the twisted tree decorated with bright green leaves and budding, light pink blossoms. He knew what that meant if his son couldn't see the color green and there was no Hyuga in the entire clan that possessed such an eye color. Neji was bonded to an outsider, as the main family would see it.

"How long haven't you been able to behold the color green?" Hizashi queried gently, sitting down beside him as Neji stared at the blades of grass strewn across his palms.

"Since I turned four and before oji put the Caged Bird Seal on me." Neji tilted his hands to the side, watching several bits of grass immediately fall back down to the ground while a few still stuck to his warm palms. "I don't want anyone but you know about my soul bond. I don't want Hiashi-oji finding out and deciding he needs to uncover and lock up my soulmate."

His father remained silent at this admission, not even wasting his breath to assure Neji, his uncle–Hizashi's older twin brother–would never do something so horrendous to prevent Neji from being happy with someone destined for him. Hiashi rarely permitted the branch Hyugas be with their soulmates, especially when the union threatened the main family. That was one reason why he kept Hizashi's soulmate hidden and out of sight–that and the fact she was in love with Hizashi, even though Hisana was Hiashi's intended when the bond was initially revealed. The two of them tried to elope together but were eventually caught by a squad main Hyuga jonins and then were subsequently dragged back to the main family's manor. Hiashi never forgave his brother for ‘stealing’ his bride and her love, and punished them both by making sure they never saw each other ever again. Hisana's new home became her prison, living in exile in her own estates while Hizashi had to sneak around to smuggle in her gifts and letters to keep their spirits and hope alive.

As if remembering the painful memory, Neji's father gazed forlornly back at the tall, imposing stone walls that barred Hisana from her true freedom. His jaw locked in a tight grimace. "Not this time, Neji."

Neji jerked his head up in surprise. "Chichi?"

His father looked back at him, a grim yet resolute gleam in his light eyes. "You will find your soulmate, Neji. You deserve happiness with your soul bond and I'll fight with every fiber in my being to grant you that opportunity, even if it kills me."

Not too long after that private conversation between, his father was gone. Murdered by the main family, even though the official claim was he died at the hands of an assassin trying to kill Hiashi and abduct Hinata. Neji doubted the genuineness of that story, for that tale was a mere cover-up to shield their sordid crimes from the village. They didn't even announce which enemy village attempted to kidnap their precious clan heir, claiming they didn't want to start a political quagmire.

The main family were always crafty, elegant liars.

Neji's pale lavender eyes blankly stared at the trees of the village, their leaves vibrant to everyone else but him. To him, they were a lightly toned grey hue. And if his uncle had anything to say about it, the color green would remain elusive to him forever.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Sakura received her soul bond mark, she didn’t tell her parents.

The symbol was a family crest, no doubt, one she was not familiar with but it burned itself along her neck, right above her collarbone. She stuffed her mouth with a pillow to muffle her screaming, utterly relieved that her parents were outside, enjoying the warm weather, and couldn’t hear her agonized noises. Then the scalding throbbing stopped and she frantically looked in the mirror to see an upside triangle with a curve up top, encompassing a small, thick swirling cloud. Transfixed, Sakura hesitantly reached out to trace the emblem, the marking smooth like ink instead of an iron hot brand. She had never seen this sigil before but then again, she came from a civilian upbringing and was unaware of the many important shinobi clans Konoha boasted to have among their ranks. She needed to learn more about the other important, non-civilian families in her village, especially since she already joined the Academy to become a kunoichi.

Checking out a record scroll listing all the known shinobi clans, both existing and defunct, was an easy task at the local library. Sakura spent her afternoon reading every name and analyzing their emblems to see if they matched the sketched replica she made earlier of her soul bond mark. The clan names were listed alphabetically and she was rather shocked to see how many ninja houses, both great and lesser, there were in the world. By the time she reached the ‘F’ section, her stomach grumbled and she had to take a break for lunch, the scroll tucked securely underneath her armpit.

About an hour and a half later, Sakura stared in shock at the perfectly inked Hyuga family crest in the scroll’s documentation, the elaborate sigil identical to the soul bond mark on her neck. Instinctively, she reached out to touch the spot, wondering what this could mean for her. There were stories and known instances of people from differing clans, both ninja and civilian, being tethered together through the soul but this was the Hyuga clan, one of Konoha’s greatest and prominent shinobi family since the founding years. How could her, a budding kunoichi-in-training (and a civilian as well), be bonded to a Hyuga?

Setting the scroll aside, Sakura finished the remnants of her lunch in a melancholic mood, frantically debating if she should finally tell her parents about her finally being bonded to another soul or remain mum on the matter. Memories of her parents’ reluctance, almost near protest, to her decision to become a shinobi of the Leaf, crept back in her mind and she cringed. If her parents still hadn’t warmed up to the idea of her being kunoichi one day and kept waiting for her to quit, then how would they come to terms that her soul mate came from one of the most prodigious clans known to shinobi?

No, she was better off not telling them the truth about her soul bond. The less her parents knew, the better.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Due to the shifting, tense conflicts with the other villages, the Hokage decided to pass a mandate that allowed certain classes of genin to graduate a year early. Neji and his fellow classmates were already on their way to gradate but the genin who were all year younger had the chance to pass the Academy and be allotted their own genin team and teacher.

Neji barely cared who they assigned as his teammates when he graduated.

All it mattered he was in the top of his class, his success and herald as a prodigy flying straight in the face of his uncle and the claim that branch members could never rise higher than the main family. He wished he was there to witness the look on Hiashi’s visage when he realized his nephew showed far more promise as a ninja than his precious heir.

Pale lavender eyes surveyed his classmates, observing their reactions rather than their eyes. He once searched for the color in their eyes, hoping to find that missing hue. There was one classmate who supposedly possessed such an eye color but nothing happened between them and the hue remained elusive to him. Of course finding his soul bond wouldn’t be so easy.

“Hello, Neji-san!” greeted one of his teammates, Lee, in a far too cheery tone. “I look forward to working with you on the many missions to come!” Neji’s other teammate, Tenten, sighed, shaking her head.

“Lee, don’t bother Neji-san.”

The said man blinked. “I wasn’t! I was simply introducing myself to him! We’re teammates, after all, so shouldn’t we get to know one another?”

I could care less.

Without saying anything, Neji stood from his desk and removed himself from the room, leaving behind a bewildered Lee and Tenten exclaiming, ‘See? I told you so!’

He didn’t know why the sight of Lee or his over-enthusism grated him so. Maybe he didn’t like overly friendly or cheerful people or maybe it was because it was well known his two teammates already found their soulmates and their bonds lead to each other. Regardless, he had to get out of this damned academy.

“Forehead Girl, I can’t believe you ended up on the same team as Sasuke-kun! I don’t know why you aren’t as excited as me about this!”

“Ino, please! Keep your voice down! I don’t think the entire village learned about who my new teammate is.” scolded a second voice. Soon enough, two girls rounded around the corner, one blonde, the other sporting brilliant pink hair. The second voice belonged to the pinkette.

Neji stopped, his eyebrows furrowing. He had heard about some other shinobi-in-trainees from other classes (like Uchiha Sasuke and other clan members) before but nothing as odd as a kunoichi with pink hair. She must be decent enough to be paired with Sasuke in their three man squad.

The blonde–Ino–shook her head, throwing her arms up in exasperation. “Well, Sakura, if you’re not going to take advantage of being teammates with Sasuke and cozying up to him, then maybe I should come around and visit you guys while you train.”

Sakura snickered. “Sure, but I can’t guarantee he’ll notice you, Ino Pig.” She looked away from her friend and in that instant, her gaze crossed with Neji’s.

And the color green, so brilliant and lustrous, exploded in his vision.

He gasped unwontedly, reeling from the shock of such a vivid arrival, and couldn’t take his eyes off the girl who the universe bonded himself too. She was staring at him too, one hand clutching her neck and shoulder. Their eye contact never broke, even if her face was locked in pain, like she was burning upside. Their bodies remained frozen, partially out of fear that this was all just a dream and the other would disappear the moment they moved. The other reason, Neji, suspected, as he adjusted to seeing green for the first time while his soulmate controlled her ragged breathing, was they didn’t know how to proceed next. Despite the common occurrences of soul bonds, there really wasn’t a textbook example in how to meet your intended soulmate. At least, one that wasn’t a mere marketing ploy to garner a quick yen or two.

Neji opened his mouth, but the girl–Sakura was her name, he recalled–beat him to it.

“It’s you,” she breathed out in wonder. She took a small step forward, those beautiful, dazzling jade eyes wide and curious. He couldn’t recall the last time someone looked at him that way–or at least, not with utter loathing or total indifference.

“I am Hyuga Neji,” he found himself replying, unsure what else to say to her. There was no need to confirm they were each other’s soulmates, the intense exchange between them upon their first encounter was enough proof.

He was still processing how he should now approach this matter when Sakura let out a victorious squeal and launched herself at him, catching him off guard long enough to trap him in a tight but warm, welcoming hug. He stiffened. Soulmate or no, she was a kunoichi and shouldn't resort to such childish behaviors—

“I found you. I finally found you.” Her face was pressed up against his chest, almost nuzzling his neck so he felt her breath tickle his skin. The sensation felt pleasing, much to his surprise. “After all these years of searching and waiting...you’re here. Just like that.” And then Sakura just had to tilt her head up and peer up at him with those beguiling eyes, their green depths pulling him in. Bonded adults who found their other soul always talked about the strength of that instant connection you experienced when you first meet your soulmate yet Neji never esteemed the soul bond would be this powerful, this intoxicating. Maybe that was why Sakura felt compelled to run up and embrace him full-heartedly.

Into those green irises he gazed on, finding his voice at last when she released him from the enfoldment. “Here I am. We are soulmates, Sakura.” He tested the words out. New as they were on his tongue they still seemed right. “And as my soulmate, I will protect you.”

His father once stormed and braved all the shinobi of the main family to set his soulmate, his beloved Hisana, free from her gilded cage and allow her to seize her own life by the reins. Even though their love story turned into a tragedy, Neji wanted to honor them and at least take the chance at life with his soulmate. It was what his father would have wanted.

Sakura blushed, no doubt thinking he was referring to enemy villages but in truth, his uncle was the main foe on his mind. Neji would have said more if it wasn’t for Sakura’s friend, the one nicknamed ‘Ino Pig’, had to barge and interrupt their precious moment quite boisterously to remind them of her presence.

“SAKURA, WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME YOUR SOULMATE WAS A HYUGA?!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The minute people started poking their heads outside of classrooms or followed the sound of her friend’s voice, Sakura seized the opportunity to grab Neji by the hand and get them both out of the Academy and to one of the training grounds for more privacy. She felt bad for not giving him any warning as she tugged him along, her feet picking up a quick sprint to avoid their classmates’ prying eyes and nosy attention. For the first day with her soulmate, Sakura didn’t want anyone else butting in and spoiling their moment. Judging how willingly Neji allowed her to drag him away from the building without warning, he harbored similar sentiments. He didn’t complain once about her sudden actions and kept up with her pace with ease. Sakura had a sneaky suspicion Neji was faster than she was and like most Hyugas, excelled in taijutsu.

Maybe we could train together some time and he could teach me how to improve my taijutsu? Iruka-sensei keeps saying I’m doing fine but never tells me exactly which areas I can improve in.

“Finally, some peace and quiet, and more importantly, privacy!” she declared out loud, even though she glanced around them one more time to make sure Ino didn’t try to follow them. Then again, she probably was telling anyone who’d listened about the soulmate meeting she just witnessed between her best friend and Hyuga Neji. And knowing Ino, she’d probably over embellish certain parts for dramatic or romantic value. Sakura’s cheeks flushed at the mere thought of how...descriptive her childhood companion could be.

“For how long? Sooner or later, our teammates are going to catch wind of our disappearance and scour the Academy in search of us.” Neji pointed out, crossing his arms, his back against a tree trunk.

Sakura resisted the urge to chew her bottom lip, knowing while Sasuke wouldn’t care where she had gone but Naruto would heatedly clamor for her whereabouts and butt into her and Neji’s personal conversation, demanding to know what was going on. While Naruto wasn’t nosy like Ino, he definitely lacked tact and perception, especially in the more delicate or sensitive matters.

“Maybe ten minutes or so, if we’re lucky,” she estimated, silently praying to Kami that her teammates were far away and wouldn’t come along to muck up her very first meeting with her soulmate. “Not a lot of time to talk but we can still try to get to know each other a little bit before we have to go back to our teams.”

Neji nodded. That seemed reasonable enough. “What do you want to know? My skills as a shinobi?”

Heat flared up on Sakura’s cheeks and she wished that practical matter was her first thought. “Well, that too. I was thinking about asking questions more on the line on what we like or dislike, favorite foods, what’s your favorite color--you know, fun little facts to learn about each other.”

Neji couldn’t remember someone asking him such mundane queries or expressing an interest in him outside of the Academy or shinobi lifestyle. He wasn’t sure if he should find the whole point such discussions pointless or refreshing. Albeit he had to admit, he was curious to learn more about Sakura. Despite his grim resignation of the main family preventing him from ever discovering the end of his soul bond, he had often wondered late in the night before going to sleep what his soulmate would be like. Would they be a shinobi like him or a civilian? Were they from a clan or have no distinct, esteemed connections of their own? And would his soulmate even be a denizen of Konoha? At least now he will finally have some answers to the questions his younger self frequently contemplated about.

“Why do you go first, Sakura?” he offered politely. She seemed to know what questions she wanted to ask him anyway.

She nearly bounced in her feet. “Okay! Let’s start with your favorite food and color. Oh, and your least favorite food!”

That was straightforward enough. “Herring soba. I hate the flavor of pumpkin and any spicy foods. As for my favorite color…” He paused, realizing he never truly thought about it until now. Sakura’s brilliant verdant eyes snare his focus again, subtly offering him an option. Her eyes were a pretty shade after all. Perhaps fate had an answer for him after all. “Let’s go with green. Now that I can see it, I don’t think I can get enough of it.”

Sakura’s jaw dropped open. “You couldn’t see the color green for years?!” She had heard that each soul bond was different, that soulmates weren’t necessarily marked the same way but to never behold the color belonging to your soulmate’s eyes until you two finally met (if the union ever betided) seemed like such a huge sacrifice to endure and wait for its end.

Neji shrugged with indifference, knowing Sakura meant well but until today, he was used to not gleaning the color green and all its various shades. Now, he couldn’t unsee the hue and that was perfectly fine with him. “It doesn’t matter now. I fathomed if I had the chance to meet my soulmate, they’d be worth the wait.” His lavender pearl eyes leveled with her jade ones. “And I was right.”

Sakura sucked her breath in, trying her utmost best to remain calm and collected while inside, she was squealing with glee. While she had always been excited at the prospect of one day finding the match to her soul bond, deep down she was nervous, frightened even, that she would be rejected because she wasn’t good enough, that she didn’t come from a noble or prestigious ninja clan or carried a formidable bloodline in her veins. She was a simple civilian girl who aspired to be a strong kuniochi one day, regardless of all the taunts and abuse the younger girls heaped on her in the early days of the Academy. And Hyuga Neji, her soul bond, seemed to have no issue with her civilian-like background. It was enough to have her heart fluttering all over again.

“T-Thank you,” she managed to say without blushing as crimson as her cheongsam but was unable to stop a grin from overtaking her lips. Neji’s smirk at her reaction was hardly inscrutable now, even as she quickly changed the subject back to her earlier inquiries. “My favorite color is red, as you might have guessed, and I have several favorite foods: anko dumplings, umeboshi, and, oh, anmitsu! But I can’t stand spicy food either. I just don’t understand how people can enjoy burning their tastes buds.” Sakura made a contemptuous face, remembering the last time she tried an overly spicy and seasoned dish. She had to gulp down an entire glass of milk to stop the fire from spreading along her tongue. That was when she learned water didn’t alleviate the fiery discomfort at all.

“I don’t understand it either,” Neji agreed, granting her a sympathetic look. He had to admit, learning such trivial pieces of information about his soulmate was rather fun. These small talks helped him understand Sakura a little bit better, especially if they seemed to be so unalike in various ways. He was about to propose a question of his own when he sensed very faint but approaching chakra signatures heading towards his and Sakura’s covert location. Instinctively, he activated his Byakugan. He did not fail to notice the way Sakura’s eyes widened with surprise or the expression of awe and wonder flashing across her features as she witnessed his kekkei genkai in action for the very first time.

“What is it? Who’s trying to locate us?” She kept her tone hushed, preventing her voice from echoing over the tall, shrouded trees they used as refuge from curious onlookers.

“Two senseis,” Neji groused, thoroughly displeased with this interruption. If the intruders were fellow classmates, they could have easily been shooed away. “Looks like we’re found out.” His gaze returned to normal.

Sakura sighed exasperatedly, dejected by these turn of events and crossed her arms irately. She had hoped her and Neji would have more time together and no one would notice their absence until much later. “We already have graduated and yet, they still want to lecture us on something we won’t remember or care about now that we’re genin and can finally go on missions.”

“Just ignored them,” Neji advised, a shadow of a smirk gracing his lips. “It’s only for today. And after that, the Academy will be a thing of the past.”

Sakura brightened at his words, standing up tall. “That’s right! And we can have more time to see each other! Do you think you’ll be free tomorrow?”

“I should be, if my new sensei doesn’t keep us training for the whole day. I’ll come find you after practice. What’s the number they assigned your team?”

“Seven. What about you?”

“Thirteen.”

“There you two are!”

In a sudden swirl of smoke, stood two Academy teachers, both eyeing their respective student from their classroom. One of them was Neji’s teacher, who merely cut him a disapproved frown while the other teacher, who was tan and supported a long scar across his nose, smiled worriedly at Sakura.

“Iruka-sensei, you shouldn’t pop in on us like that! Neji and I were having a private conversation!” Sakura protested indignantly.

Iruka almost appeared apologetic the way he shot her an empathetic glance, his smile unwavering, before addressing them both. “I’m sorry to cut this moment short, but you two need to go with your genin team and meet your new sensei. I’m sure the two of you have plenty of time later talk to each other.” He then winked knowingly, now wearing an absurdly goofy grin while ushering both a stoic Neji and an irked Sakura out of the canopy of trees and back to the Academy. Before they parted to be formally introduced to their shinobi squad, Sakura gave him an eager wave, her eyes alight with the promise of them meeting up tomorrow. Even though he only knew her company for such a brief time, he did enjoy the way she beamed at him like that, rife with hope and supreme joy, as if they were the only two people in the world and nothing else mattered. Neji was beginning to understand the inexplicable bliss of having a soul bond much better now. And he had Sakura to thank for that.

Feeling lighthearted for the first time in years, Neji glanced hopefully at the doors to the Academy and the cherry blossoms trees that framed the grounds around the building. He wondered if Sakura liked cherry blossoms or she preferred other flora in Konoha.

Next time they talked, he’ll have to ask her what her favorite flowers were.

#narutofantasyweek #narutofantasyweek2020 #NejiSaku #Sakura x Neji #my writing #soul bounds #naruto fantasy week #naruto-fantasy-week #Naruto #Soulmates AU #Soulmates #Soul mates

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jadienjaystoriesandart · 4 years ago

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Sander Sides AU - DanganRonpa

Gosh, I make alot of dark AU’s, I do have fluffy ones, but I find people like my darker ones. This one actually wasn’t my complete own, the girl that came up with most of it has been my RP buddy for a while. IDK if she has a tumbler, but on Wattpad she is known as Littlewolf65.

Anywho, this was a RP idea she had, and we hardly use it, so I’m posting about it because DANG, was it good. (If this gets taken down it’s cause she wanted it to be.)

But given neither of us really want to put in time and effort to writing up a whole story, both due to college and other projects we have going on, I’m posting it to the fandom. (Plus I had ALOT of other Au’s to write about if you guys ever want oneshots. Just leave a message or shoot me a ask for what kind of oneshot you want to see. :D )

Summary: Dystopian Future based situation. The world had pretty much fallen to despair and the ‘Tragedy’ has begun. Ring Leader of it is Thomas Sanders, the Ultimate Despair. Along with his six Sector Leaders, Thomas started pretty much the biggest class war seen in history. Cunning, smart, manipulative, and seen as the ‘leader’ to many, Thomas is not a man to take lightly.

Thomas Sanders: The main guy himself, in this one, unlike my other AU’s, he’s much more... hmm, not really ‘evil’ as he is manipulative. His ‘FamILY’ consist of six guys he all ‘save’ from their situations. Really he’s the Ultimate Despair due to the fact being a youtuber reached a point for him where he never felt much happiness in his life. Due to how hard life was already, not just for him, but others. But rather than fade out like most do in their despair, he took it and made something of it. Demolishing the class system and starting what is known as the Tragedy. Really, he humbles himself, he just whispered to the right people, recruited the right group, and the Tragedy just started itself. Oh, he does somewhat care of his sector leaders, even if it’s in a very twisted, emotionally manipulative way.

Logan Sanders: Background - Thomas’s first Sector leader, the Logic Sector, and the second largest compared the the Snake Sector. Since he was born, Logan Adam’s had alot put upon him by his higher class family. Expected to be the ‘Most Likely To Succeed’ student. Private school, tutors, nothing but the best for him. This family prioritized learning and academics over anything else, if their boy was not a prodigy, they’d make him one. One can guess as a result, this left Logan having to grow up much faster, never really had a childhood. Where he was forced to put his academics above all else, this left him unable to empathize or socialize properly. Feelings just get in the way of progress. He went into private school when he was a teenager, and culture shock was a thing. He shied away from people. Disliked them alot, and didn’t want his parents to punish him should ‘friends’ become a distraction. With no real empathy and emotions to call his own, Thomas found it real easy to fill that void with despair. Convincing our Logan to kill his family and free himself, Logan joined Thomas after that. Thomas treats Logan well, like he’s an actual person and talking to him as such. Something his family and others never did. His parents acted like he was a robot, and it became a common taunt used against him when bullied. “He’s a robot guys, not like he can feel the hurt in our words.” Oh the highschool drama, not knowing what real hurt is. Logan did enjoy torturing them, their despair felt great. Logan is a hard core believer in what Thomas says, that despair is the only real, tangible thing in this world to rely on. He’s a good example of this. Sector - The Logic Sector harbors from the best minds the Despair has. It takes up majority of the west part of the city, and is one of two ways to the main area where Thomas and them live. It’s meant to be like a maze, riddles, traps, not really designed to kill a person, it’s meant to test your mental capacity. Logan love logic puzzles, hence the name of the sector. Mostly it’s adults that live in this sector and help with making traps and weapons for the Despair. They are deadly, precise, and Logan is a very strict leader to his people. But with good reason, after all, if he left them to themselves, they might become like Patton or Virgil’s sector. There are many buildings here meant just for the torture and turning of ‘new members’. It’s neighbors are the Heart Sector to the right, and across from the main area and Snake Sector.

Patton Sanders: Background - The second man after Logan that Thomas recruited, the Heart Sector is his area. Patton lived in orphanage for a long time, always taking care of. Forced to take on a parental role to the younger kids very early, as he was the eldest. The owners were very uncaring, mostly in it for a check to spend on alcohol and drugs, and dolling up the place for each visit to get more money. Patton was up to his eyes in stress, trying to hard, but feeling like the weight of the world was on his shoulders. When Thomas found it, it took some convincing, but once he got through, he convinced Patton to kill the owners of the place. Even any kids that tried to stop him from doing so, after all, if they didn’t think their ‘Dad’ was doing what was right, then how can they be trusted? Something in Patton that day just snapped, but he hasn’t regretted it, he feels upset he had to kill them, but he easily waves it off that they just didn’t understand. It was better this way. Even in the Heart Sector he still is very much a parental figure. Taking care of the children of anyone who wanders into his sectors, ranging from ages 5 to 13. A few teens stick around and help their leader out before moving to other sectors later in life. As Patton despises most adults, finding them selfish and disgusting. Not that they last long when the kids all go in for the kill. One twisted little family there.

Sector - It’s two neighbors from the left is the Logic Sector and to the right is the Storm Cloud Sector. Given him and Virgil take care of the kids and teens they work really close together. With Patton as ‘Dad’ and Virgil as ‘Older Brother’. Across from it is the Imagination Sector. This sector is not as small as the Storm Cloud Sector, but not as big as Logic and Snake Sectors are. it’s a decent size through and a safe haven for kids, well... safe if your a crazed, insane, murder child. It’s as a ‘Wonderland’ to little kids, most people say to avoid it, especially the Hope Foundation, as harming children isn’t what they are about.Patton is very nice to kids and most teens, he teaches them to survive in this world and the things they need in life. Adults that he does like are often ‘Teachers’ in his sector.

Roman Sanders: Background - Oof, this one is a sad one. Roman and his twin Remus great up on the streets from a young age when they were abandoned at the age of 6. As they grew up, many kids came to see them as their ‘Heroes’. Something both twins took pride in, and vowed to help those weaker than them. When they are about turn 16, Thomas, about early 20′s this time, took them in and gave them a home. Though, as they lived with Thomas, their savior subtly would imply the other was unfaithful and planning something. He easily turned the brothers against each other with this, and sat back watching the sparks. A heated argument broke out, and ended with Roman killing his twin brother. Roman was crushed by this, and thus the despair settled in. Thomas comforted him afterwards, and something in Roman’s mind just snapped. There and then he vowed to be everyone ‘Hero’ in his sector, going into the deluded fantasy he was the ‘Prince’ or the ‘Knight in Shining Armor’ for them. Thus is where this sector comes into play.

Sector - The Imagination Sector neighbors are the Storm Cloud Sector to the right and to his left is the largest sector the Snake Sector and right across from the Heart Sector. This sector... oh boy, if you thought Logic’s sector is deadly then steer clear from Roman’s. These traps are designed to kill you slowly, I say slowly because Roman is meant to ‘save’ you like the ‘hero’ he is. For those who have read or seen Hunger Games, think of the traps like the Pods in Mockingjay. Thanks Logan, he’s the one who designed the traps, as a result very few know how to navigate the area. Safe for those that live there and the leaders. Roman and his Knights ‘save’ people from these traps. Though, not everyone survives these twisted games. Shockingly people enter because this sector actually holds the food source of them, well guarded and is the most abundant in resources. Something Roman takes pride in and defends ferociously. His Knights are a few select people who Roman and Thomas trust deeply, they are ruthless, and very strong. Dressed in reds and blacks and very intimidating, brainwashed all to hell. One thing to note, you better be VERY grateful to Roman if he saves you, because boy is just a ruthless. Not afraid to toss you back into danger should he think you are ungrateful. He works close with Logan, coming up with sick ways to trap people. And works alot with Janus in training people for the Despair.

Janus Sanders: Background - Say hello to another rich boy, and actually he’s the one whose dad used to ‘own’ most of the city. Having funded for most of the buildings, technology used, and owned the main company most worked for. But he was a rather neglectful father, cheated on Janus’s mother alot too, and mostly ignored his son from a young age. When Janus was older, about 16 or 17, a huge fight broke out between his father and mother. His dad pretty much was in a drunken rage, and Janus tried to defuse the situation. And the end result was he was burned on the right side of his face with hot water, deforming it slightly. His mother walked out, and his father said he was now ‘ugly’ to look at. Janus had alot of issues with self worth after this, as his father ignored him even more. Though he can see fine and talk, he still is very aware he looks like a monster. His father only ever gave him small jobs to do for the company, keeping his once handsome son out of the public’s eye. Out of sight, out of the way. When Thomas approached Janus, he wasn’t stupid, oh he knew what games Thomas was playing. But years of dealing with it ahd taken it’s toll, and Janus, though well aware of what Thomas was doing, didn’t care. He knew Thomas was only interested in his position and power. But, it was a chance, to get back on his father for it all. Sabotaging the city wasn’t hard, this is what happens when society relies too much on technology. The company took the fall out, and angry mob tore apart his father, the city imploded, and thus the Tragedy started and spread from there. Absolute anarchy. Janus found he agreed, despair was the only way, and it was wonderful. Still, despite knowing Thomas cared little like a actual person, Janus came to care for him. Even if it wasn’t reciprocated. More despair that way. Sector - The Snake Sector is the largest sector, making the parts the Logic Sector needs. Filled with the most cunning, manipulative, and feared people in Thomas’s Despair Army. Janus is their ring leader, and shows his little snakelings how to get by in the world. He enjoys it, showing them the skills to use people, to make things that work well to help you. This sector is the power source of the area, and is the second entrance to the main area where Thomas is. Janus is Thomas’s right hand, and is the one who helps with the brainwashing along with Logan and Roman, who he works close with. Though not confusing or deadly as the others, you can’t really trust in inhabitants who will lead you astray easily. Trust No One. And if you happen to get close to Janus, best be careful, because the final challenge isn’t easy, and many have died by his hand. It’s all a game to him, and Janus loves mind games.

Virgil Sanders: Background - His is possibly the shortest like with Romans. Simple enough, he was also abused, but his parents were much worse. Never having wanted a child, they would often lock Virgil in the basement with one dinky light that barely did anything and was prone to busting alot. He lived with the spiders there, and became scared of the dark and enclosed spaces. Though he was allowed the go to school, if he told anyone about his treatment, his parents easily deflected them. And he was punished harshly. As a result, he grew up rather small, he’s easily the shortest of all the leaders. While at school, he met a man in his 20′s. Thomas wasn’t like other adults, who listened, he cared, and he helped Virgil. Convincing the other to take his despair and get revenge. Helping Virgil kill his parents that night and hide their bodies. Not that they were ever missed, Virgil isn’t even sure if the police or neighbors ever even noticed. He ran away with Thomas, and he was the fourth person recruited. Patton came to care deeply for his ‘dark strange son’. And Virgil, who was affectionate and touch starved, soaked it all up, coming to care for Patton. Roman took on the role of ‘older brother’ fast, with Janus and Logan being ‘mothers’. Something Virgil came to adore. Sure, this family is twisted, but he’s never locked up, starved, or put in the dark again.

Sector - The Storm Cloud sector, is the smallest of all of them, and is mostly on the outskirts, how Virgil likes it. Neighbors to the right being the Heart Sector and the left the Imagination Sector. It’s the one of the three entrances into the city itself, and is the main main one into it. With two back door areas being the Heart and Imagination. Mostly teenagers live here in the brooding atmosphere and darken streets, who shy away when the sun is out. Which for the are they live in isn’t much. Virgil is the ‘Older Brother’ to them. A role he takes seriously as he doesn’t want someone to have to live as he did. Only the most unruly get that treatment, but shockingly he never has to give out many punishments. Working along side Patton mostly in taking care of the kids and teens, few adults live in his area. As, like Patton, he despises most adults. Virgil is very good with fears, and knows just how to push someones buttons. Oh he may look all soft and innocent, but like his sector, looks are deceiving. You’d think it’s just a bunch of teenagers being their usual selves in a ‘life sucks’ phase. But boy are you wrong, they are armed, they are trained the kill, and enjoy doing so to any who things their sector is the ‘easy’ sector.

And there you have it, let me know if you guys want any oneshots on any of my AU’s. Fanart is well needed. And if you like these AU’s, I might post some of my more happier ones rather than dark ones. Any questions? feel free to ask!

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dark-night-sky-99 · 5 years ago

Text

What if I never get over you

Title: What if I never get over you

*My first Languaje isn’t english and this is my first time posting anything so I deeply apologize for my bad grammar

@welldonebeca writing challenge

Loki x Enhance Reader

Warnings: None

Additional Info: The readers powers are an equal to the flash, the flash’s power is speed. This include fading and Flash time (in the story is going to be called tempo state)

Summary: Y/N lost everything to Thanos, now she has a chance to save her friends and see her beloved for the last time. But what will she say?

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He looks just as he looked when we first met, his cheekbones were defined, his skin was pale under the moonlight. His long hair falling around his face highlighting his every feature cascading in light waves resting in his shoulders. His eyes were bright as a ghost of a smile barely made its way to his face. It was surreal, the feeling in my stomach wasn’t pleasant. Everything seems perfect. Almost to perfect. The image of him faded leaving me to my thoughts once again.

It was a continuous neverending cycle: work, eat, sleep, dream and repeat. After the snap life was dull everything changed and not for the better of it. Clint was off the charts, Steve visits from time to time, Tony built a new life, Bruce was somewhere around the city and there’s no news of Thor since we went into space in search for Thanos. Meanwhile Nat and I stayed in the compound, we did missions and searched every day but there was no luck, until Lang came knocking on our door.

Time travel, it was a fantasy that could only be seen in movies. It was impossible to achieve until Tony Stark made it possible and that’s how we find ourselves here today, each of us in a white, red and grey suit, prepared to face anything and more determined than ever.

“All right, we have a plan. Six stones, three teams, one shot. Five years ago, we lost… we lost friends, we lost family, we lost a part of ourselves. Today we have a chance to take it all back. You know your teams; you know your missions. Get the stones, get them back. One round trip for each, no room for mistakes, no do overs. Most of us are going to somewhere we know, that doesn’t mean you should know what to expect, be careful, look out for each other. This is the fight of our lives and we’re going to win. Whatever it takes, Good Luck.” Steve said as we waited for the machine to send us away.

“Nat? before you go just, please be careful, you’re the only family I have left and wouldn’t bare to lose the only person I have left” I said lowly my voice slightly wavering.

“Y/N everything will be fine, whatever happens know that I’m great full that life gifted me with you as a sister. I’ll see you in a minute” and with that she went away. We all did.

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2012

“Alright, we all have our assignments. Two stones uptown, one stone down. Stay low, keep an eye on the clock.” Steve said.

In that same moment 2012 hulk started to break a car repeatedly into a Chitahuri. We all looked at Bruce as he covered his face in embarrassment.

“Maybe smash a few things along the way.” Steve said

“I think it’s good Tullius but whatever” said Bruce as he proceeded to walk away.

-----Stark Tower-----

Tony, Scott and I watched the scene in front of us hiding from sight in search of the tesseract.

“If it’s all the same to you, I’ll have that drink now.”

His voice, it made my eyes water. It’s been a little over five years since I’ve seen him. He was full of bruises; it broke my heart to see him again. I couldn’t contain myself as tears started to fall, the room started to get smaller and it was getting harder to breathe.

“Um, Tony? I think somethings wrong with Y/N.” said Scott

“Shit, she’s having a panic attack. Hey sweetheart breath for me, everything is fine, just breath” tony said as he held my shoulders to keep me from falling.

“Tony, I…I…” I couldn’t breathe, my chest hurt, my hands were trembling. The pain was unbearable, it was as if the last 5 years of heartache surfaced. Seeing him after so long, hearing his voice, it takes every ounce of my cells not to go running to him. I was stuck in the never-ending memory

“Tony, what is happening to her?” Scott asked worried.

“She’s having a panic attack.” Tony replied quickly as he continued to try and calmed me down.

“I can see that Tony, my question is why now?” Scott asked nervousness evident in his voice.

“Because of Reindeer Games over there” answered Tony

“Reindeer Games… what does Loki has to do with anything. I mean yeah he’s the bad guy, but she wasn’t even here for the attack, right?” Scott asked confused

“He was her fiancé, come on Y/N, breath it’s ok” Tony said calming me down

My breathing slowly returned to normal and I stopped shaking. The pain was still there and knowing that he’ll be the one I can’t save makes it harder to cope with. But I was on a mission it had to be completed for everyone’s sake.

“I’m ok… let’s just get this over with, let’s get you guys to the first floor before they notice us.” I said my voice still slightly broken.

“Y/N you don’t have to do this, you can go home. It’s ok. I know this can’t be easy” tony said.

“Won’t he come back when we get the stones?” Scott asked

“No, he won’t. He didn’t die in the snap” I replied

“Hold on guy’s, you might get dizzy” I said as I used my speed and faded through the walls onto the first floor.

“You guy’s good?” I asked

“Yeah, every organ in my body is out of place but besides that, I’m good. What about you Stark?” said Scott.

“Yeah, might just puke” he said looking a little pale.

“All right, on with the plan. I’ll be here for extraction.” I told Tony.

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I was watching from the distance as Tony walking away with the Tesseract, all was going according to plan until hulk slammed the doors opened and sending both Tony and the tesseract away. The tesseract landed by Loki’s feet. In an instance he picked it up and as I speed towards him using the tempo state to make time stop not noticing that he was teleporting himself and taking myself with him in the process.

“What have you done mortal, where are we?” Loki Asked in irritation

I froze and couldn’t say anything, he looked so young. I couldn’t control my self my hands had a mind of their own. My eyes were filled with unshed tears, my lips where trembling. My hands went to his face slowly caressing his features. He looked at me confusion with written all over his face.

“Ma’am, are you alright” he asked

“I’m afraid if I answered that you might think I mental” I said barely

“You’d be surprised with what I’d considered insanity, would you mind removing your hands from my face?” he asked rather irritated

“I’m sorry, it’s just… rather difficult. I’m not from this time and you, you don’t know me yet, but you do please make the most of it because I don’t know if I can save you yet.” I swallowed hard and without thinking threw my arms around him and held him as if my life depended on him. I held him, held his scent for the last time.

“I know you’re not my Loki, and that you’re probably confused but, let me speak please. Tell the truth, I know what happened don��t let Thanos win, he’s taken enough from me and he took everything form you. Don’t let him win, not again.”

I let go of him and took the letter out of my pocket.

“I’ve been carrying this since 2018, you’ll understand everything.” I looked at him one last time gathered all the courage I had left and kissed him one last time, tears ran down my face his lips were moving against my own all the feelings I had bottled for five years. I rested my head against his own

“Why do I feel like I know you when I’m certain I’ve never seen you before?” Loki asked holding my face in his hands.

My clock beeped; my time is up…

“I love you Loki, always” I said traveling back to my time.

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“Wait…’’ but it was to late, she had already left

I was utterly confused with the events that just unfolded, who was that woman? Why was she so heartbroken? How did she know about Thanos?

I looked at the envelope in my hand, it was slightly crumpled. I opened it and found a handwritten letter along with a ring.

“We met in a common day in November, it was cold day. It was the day I least expected to be honest. I never thought I’d meet someone like you, you were so mysterious, so intimidating but so alluring. And it was amusing honestly, I wasn’t looking for love or anything related to it; I didn’t even believe in love and you managed to tear down every wall I had ever built and became my home.

All my life I’ve spent learning control, how to control my powers, my emotions my life. I’ve had countless of teachers and yet you’re the one I’ve learned the most of. You thought me that time was relative for everyone, for instance I didn’t know that one simple kiss could make time stop nor did I know that with only one look you’d made my body weak. But the one thing you thought me that no one else could ever be able to teach me was that I couldn’t love anyone the way a love you, for I was a prisoner; of your eyes, of your lips, your arms… your soul.

After meeting you I felt like I finally found a missing piece my life had been desperately searching for. Life finally took a good turn for once. Every aspect of my life was perfect because you were in it and for that I’ll be eternally great full. You see life wasn’t always kind to me and I did horrible things… I was trained to do horrible things. I only had my sister and even though I didn’t deserve it, I met you.

Life took a rough turn the team was struggling, shield was falling, the world was a disaster, but you were there in every step of the way. You made everything worthwhile. We had been together for about two years now and you’ve asked me to marry you. I accepted; it was perfect, simple but that was just us. We kept it a secret since that went against us, we loved our privacy. It allowed us to be us without anyone intruding.

Then Thor called, he needed you and you went back to Asgard. It was a painful day, part of my heart left with you, but you were coming back after everything was solved. You said that when you’d returned and get married finally be more than just a God and an Experiment; we’d be husband and wife away from everything. It would be just us, and it was everything we wanted. But you left and days without you became endless and suffocating.

They say time cures everything but that’s a lie, every day made it harder and yet I learned to live with the pain. I embraced it and in an odd way made my peace with it because it was better to live with the memories of something wonderful, knowing that I had the chance to experience love than to live a life unknown to its existence.

Time went by… earth was in crisis; the team was broken but that didn’t stop the treats from appearing and that’s when it happened. A ship dropped by in search of stones.

It was Thanos, he arrived, and we did everything in our power to stop him… we failed, and he erased half of the universe existence. During the battle I missed Thor’s entrance and it wasn’t until I heard lightning strikes that I took notice of his presence. I immediately started searching for you. If he was here, why weren’t you? Then the snap happened, I saw Thor on his knees, Steve lying across the floor watching as his best friend became ashes. Yet there was a lingering hope that you were here, and I couldn’t help but to wonder how it would feel to be in your arms once again. So, I went to Thor, he was still kneeling on the floor. He looked so broken it gave me a teary-eyed look and kept repeating how he failed repeatedly. The words he told me that day I would never forget, for my heart shatters into a million pieces. You had died, Thanos had taken your life and my whole existence with it.

I remember falling on my knees, holding my chest and screaming in pain. It was unbearable, I had been through multiple types of torture, but nothing compared to the helplessness and impotence I was feeling. Then questions started going through my mind. Why couldn’t I have died to? Why were you gone, and I was still standing, breathing? God knows I didn’t deserve it. I had lost my team, and the man I love once again to the same monster who once ruined his life all in a few hours.

5 years went by and I stayed with Nat, we tried everything, but nothing made sense. We were helpless. That was until Scott Lang appeared, he gave us hope once again. We could bring everyone back… most of them.

That’s how I was able to give you this letter (which I’ve been writing throughout the years). We discovered time travel. You see, in order to bring everyone, back we must travel to the past to collect all the stones and lucky for me, you had one of them. I don’t know how I reacted when I saw you once again. And I’m sorry if I’ve frightened you in any way, but now all I can imagine is how it would feel to touch you one more time, to kiss you one more time and to hear your voice one last time.

You know, I tried moving on and start with someone new, but it was impossible. I couldn’t move on, every time I tried, I failed. I was looking and hoping to find someone like you but Loki, there was no one like you and they could see right through me because all I could see was you.

I know you’re not my Loki and that you have no clue who I am because I wasn’t part of the team in 2012. We met a year after. Nevertheless, I have to say this because I’m certain that I’ll never get the chance. And we might not achieve this mission and if we don’t it means that this is your future and you can’t go without knowing that I love you with all I am. Also, you deserve to be at peace with your mind my love, I know your truth, the real one so please I beg you to show them when the time comes, save yourself from the sorrow that’s to come.

You know, I used to ask myself: what if I never get over you? Until I realize that I was asking a question that bared no answer because my love, I’ll never get over you.

Forever yours, with Love

Y/N Y/L/N

I could feel my eyes shedding tears, how could this happen…

She looked so broken and it tore my heart out, I let the tesseract fall of my hand as I sat on the floor crying. In a matter of minutes my life took a change, unexpected and heartbreaking. I felt every emotion, every tear, I felt her heart breaking through her words. And its broken mine, to know that life was so cruel and unfair. I crumble the envelop in my hand and felt something more inside it. A ring… her ring…

My mind was running wild with possibilities, most of them completely insane but I couldn’t stay with crossed arms.

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I made it back to the compound, everyone had their stones. I looked around Steve, Toney, Scott, Bruce, Nebula, Thor and Rocket they were all breathing heavily. I looked to my side and expected to see Nat, but I was only met with Clint kneeling on the floor, dry tears in his eyes and Nat nowhere to be seen.

“Clint, where is Natalia? Where’s my sister?” I asked brokenly

“She… She sacrificed herself to save me. I tried but she… I’m so sorry Y/N” he said full on crying by now.

“No, you’re lying. She didn’t… she wouldn’t leave me. Not her… please god not her” I said my knees gave out, my vision went black and I felt myself falling as I welcomed unconsciousness and someone catching me before hitting the ground.

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“How is she?” Steve asked Tony

“I gave her some sedatives to calm her down but, God Steve… this wasn’t supposed to happened we were all supposed to come back. She deserved to live more than anyone here” tony said.

“Don’t you think I know that; she gave everything up for this team. We were her family and we failed her. And Y/N… she’s not going to be able to cope with this. You sow how long it took her to get over Loki… this is going to tear her apart. Nat was all she had left.” Steve said.

“If you think that girl got over Loki, you are way in over your head. She’s not over him, she had a full-on panic attack when she heard his voice back in the tower. She broke down Steve, it was horrible, she was so vulnerable, so broken. I can’t see her like that, and she can’t lose anyone else. She won’t recover, she’ll lose her mind.” Tony said.

“Have you guys found a way to bring them back yet?” I find my self asking, not knowing how to deal with this properly.

“Y/N, what are you doing up? You should be resting.” Said Steve

“I’ve rested, now let’s get this over with. I’m sick of losing everyone I love because of the same bastard” I said as I started to make my way to the lab.

“You heard the lady, back to work. We have a lot to do” said Tony.

“Y/N, I’m so sorry, this is all my fault…” Clint started to say but I cut him off.

“This wasn’t your fault Clint; she was your sister as much as she was yours. And understand what she did, and I would’ve done the same exact thing. So, stop blaming yourself for something you had no control. Don’t let your guilt make her sacrifice go in vain.” I said and went in the lab.

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We managed to build a gauntlet and Bruce snap his finger, bringing everyone back. Thanos arrived as soon as Bruce had snapped his fingers. It was a bloodbath like any other war. We succeeded, everyone was back, Thanos was defeated but at a horrible cause. Earth lost its best Defenders. Ones earlier than others, we lost Nat retrieving the stone and Tony sacrificed himself for the world’s sake. Which leads us to today…

We were all standing outside of his house, dressed in black, sorrow was clouding all of us. We said our goodbyes to both Tony and Nat. Steve was going back to deliver all the stones to their rightful time. I made my way back and sat in the bench looking at the lake that was reflecting the sunset. That was until I felt a presence behind me, once you turned your only thought was, how is this possible…

“I know that I’m not the Loki you fell In love with, and I know that I can’t replace what you had with him but, if you’re willing I would like to try and maybe allow us both for once to have a little bit of happiness in this world full of sorrow.” Loki said

“How are you here?” you asked

“The tesseract” he answered simply

“I… Loki…” my voice breaking “you shouldn’t be here; you have a chance. You can live the life you always wanted” I replied

“My dear, after that day when I read your letter, with every emotion you on displayed you became everything I’ve ever wanted” Loki Said.

“I don’t know what to say Loki” I replied honestly

“Then don’t say anything and let your mind speak to me” he made his was closer and closer till he was kneeling Infront of the bench I was sitting. He held my hand in his as we stared into each other’s eyes.

“Will you open your mind to me, my little dove?” he asked me

I closed my eyes and let the memories run through his mind. Images of Loki and me: how we met, dancing around Stark Tower, our first kiss, our first date, the first time we said I love you, everything. He saw everything. When I opened my eyes, he was already staring at me with intensity and something else I couldn’t figure out

“I don’t mean to replace what you had, those memories are yours to cherish but, I would love to create a few of our own, and when the time is right I’d love for you to be mine only if you’re willing to give me a chance” he said

“There would be nothing else I’d want more in this world Loki, but you’re going to sacrifice all you have, and might be able to have, just to be here in the future. I can’t allow that love and I won’t it selfish to even consider it” I told him

“Y/N just listen, one chance is all I want, it’s all I ask. Allow yourself to be happy for once, you deserve it” he looked at me with pleading eyes.

“please” he added, his voice breaking a little.

“I… I’ll give us a chance” I whispered

Not to seconds later his lips where on my, his hands pulling me up to my feet as he wrapped them around my waist, my hands tangled in his hair as our lips moved together. So many emptions were in the kiss. I could feel the pain of the years, the scarceness of touch, the need to be held. Both of us pulled away from the kiss. I leaned my head on his chest, holding onto him for dear life, afraid that if I let go, he might vanish, and it will be all in my head.

“Don’t let me go, please.” I asked against his chest

“Never, never again my love” he answered as he tightened his hold around me.

#loki x reader #natasha x reader #marvel #mcu #endgame #loki x female reader #loki oneshot #writting challenge #marvel writing challenge #loki #loki imagine #loki angst #loki x y/n #loki x you #loki x reader #the avengers x reader #avengers x reader #avengers x reader #tony x reader

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writtenbyhappynerds · 4 years ago

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Fanfiction 102: Unit 1, Villains

Welcome back to class! The topic of villains came up while writing Fanfiction 101. The Editor and I consider villains important. They are the most important characters in a narrative because it is their actions and their choices that shape the plot, the desires of the main character, and their actions. Usually, in fanfiction, you already have a villain. If you write Harry Potter fanfic, your villains are Voldemort, Umbridge, Snape, Lucius, etc. If you write Supernatural fanfic, your villains are Crowley, Lucifer, Chuck, etc. We can acknowledge that for most fanfic writers the most you’ll have to do is accurately capture the voice of a villain so you can replicate them for your story in a way the audience will believe. This is done by studying the character and taking care to not reduce the villain to a one-note trait of their personality. However, we see lots of fanfic writers add in their own villains; these are usually secondary or minor characters. Sometimes they are backstory villains only, or sometimes they’re just bullies meant to be an added antagonist. These villains, because they are all your own, need to be the most important characters in your stories, and that’s why we’re here to talk today.

Villains are the most difficult to figure out. When you write a villain, you are writing a character and explaining to yourself, and therefore the audience, not only why this person is a bad guy, but why they’re doing bad things. I do not like villains who are Bad Guy McBadGuys that exist solely to make the OC’s life miserable. That isn’t a villain. That’s an asshole. These characters are the most common villains we see, and I myself am guilty of writing them in the past because we don’t want to give the bad guys thought. Usually, the writer wants to focus on the protagonist, but the side characters and opposing characters need way more thought than the OC. The OC’s motivations are easy to figure out. Their job is to complete the quest, save the day, and oppose the villain. Their entire goal as a character can be written around a villain, and when that happens you better be damn sure you know why the villain is doing what they’re doing. One-note villains are common in both Harry Potter and the Avengers. Usually, this is because the villain is either a Death Eater or HYDRA, and they can be bad for the sake of being bad because we know both groups are bad guys. I want you to remove yourselves from that approach. I would highly encourage you to read the comic series published a few years back called Captain America: Hail HYDRA. If you know Avengers you probably know this comic, because it’s the one where the writers tried to say that Captain America, God’s Righteous Man, has been a secret HYDRA agent this whole time. It was a whole Twitter moment, it was the #saynotoHYDRACap thing. That comic. In that comic, along with Captain America pledging his support to HYDRA, is an account from a character named Robbie Dean Tomlin. We as the audience follow Robbie’s story and see how a young kid can get wrapped up in an organization like HYDRA and get beaten and broken down to the point that he’s willing to become a suicide bomber for them. What Hail HYDRA can teach us is how to make a villain relatable, and how a normal character can get wrapped up in a group that we as an audience can look at and immediately know is bad. We see them as evil, but we never question why or how a character gets involved in that. If you are going to write a villain that can compel an audience, you need to start asking those questions. Why is this character where they are? Are they angry? Are they scared of someone else? Does this character think they’re doing the right thing? If so, why are they/do they use violence to accomplish their goals? Why is that necessary? When you look at Robbie Dean Tomlin’s story you can answer all those questions. You get him not as a villain, but as a character, and that’s where it starts.

Another great example of villains as characters and not as bad guys is found in Avatar: The Last Airbender. Specifically the episode ‘The Boiling Rock’ where Sokka and Zuko break into the Fire Nation’s highest security prison and pretend to be guards. Their goal is to break Sokka’s dad and girlfriend Suki out of prison. The important note is that during the episode Sokka is able to chat with the Fire Nation guards. These people are his adversaries in this episode. They could imprison or kill him if he is discovered, but the guards aren’t set on that. They aren’t hell-bent on torturing the prisoners either. They’re just people. Not only that they’re nice people. The guards are nice to each other. They’re nice to Sokka, and they give not only their characters but the Fire Nation more dimension. Not every Death Eater under Voldemort is going to share his exact viewpoints or his bloodthirst. They are not all hell-bent on, ‘I must capture and kill Harry Potter,’ or, ‘I must spit in the face of muggles and mudbloods because they have to know their place.’ The same is true for HYDRA, or the Empire if you’re writing for Star Wars or the Fire Nation. You have to start writing your characters as people and give them the backstory and reasoning that would make them evil.

Me personally, when I am writing a story the villain is the first character I write. I want to know them and know why they’re about to be mean to my OC. We’ll use two different villains I’ve written as examples: Anna and Sion. We will also use a common villain from fanfiction, Dolores Umbridge, for comparison.

Treat your villains like protagonists. In a sense, they are the protagonists of their own stories, they just happen to be the antagonists of your OC’s. Know about their hobbies. Whether they have a family. If they don’t, what happened to that family? This information doesn’t need to be used necessarily, but it helps you as a writer know your antagonist as a person. For Anna, I know that she loves the outdoors. She likes rock-climbing and kayaking and she enjoys time outside. I know she has a son that she loves dearly, and she has a specific brand of French candy that she keeps well-stocked for herself. Sion, I know she has been married twice and has kids from both marriages. I know she likes fantasy novels because the idea of mythical beasts sounds cool to her. Dolores Umbridge, we know as readers loves the color pink. She likes frilly and lacy things. She loves cats. She’s the epitome of the old white ladies who shop at Dillards. It’s okay for you to give your villains something that isn’t stereotypically villainous. When we get into good examples of villains we’ll explain more why quirks and characterization is so important.

Once you’ve created a character with a personality, start to flesh out where they work. What they do. This will give you a better idea of how they will interact with the OC. This too can be against the grain of stereotypical villains, which the Editor and I usually see as men in dark rooms brooding over something we the audience don’t know and beating the OC because it’s fun. Again, that isn’t a villain, that’s just an asshole. I also as a reader don’t know who that villain is as a person. I just know that I’m supposed to really really hate him or her because they’re mean to the OC. So, give them a personality, and tell me about their life. Are they the CEO of a massive corporation? Are they politicians? A teacher? A spy? Give me something I can take in and help me as the reader understand who this person is. We know Dolores is senior undersecretary to the Minister. She is a woman in a high place who loves her job. Anna, for example, we’ll say is a former spy. She was a spy when she was younger and has moved up in her organization to the point where she oversees other agents and acts as their support. Sion on the contrary is the head of the department of Chemistry wherever she works. She oversees students and has her own research lab. All characters have opportunities to interact with people, and therefore the OC. Your villain shouldn’t be a hermit. That’s less realistic, because then, how can we expect them to go antagonize the OC if they never leave the house?

So, we now have a character with a personality, and we have a character with a career that fits their story. A good way that I’ve found to turn a character who would otherwise be good evil, is to pile on those flaws and have them act on their weaknesses more so than their strengths. We give our protagonists strengths and weaknesses but seldom do they lean on their weaknesses and put faith in insecurities. Let your villains down that kool-aid. It’ll make the drop into madness smoother. For Sion, we’ll have a character who is insecure. She is insecure about her usefulness, she’s worried her department will be absorbed into another, she’s insecure about her age and about some freak from nowhere with none of her training or experience being able to take away and undercut her value in the society she lives in. She has many children to provide for, and has a lot to lose should she lose her job (psst, this is where the OC comes in). Anna as a character grew a bit differently. Her insecurities came from her backstory, where she fell in love with another spy, had a long happy life with that spy until the same life that brought them together and made the world a game killed him. Her weaknesses come in that she feels abused by the system, and that she will not let others be abused by the same system. She feels more gallant than a character like Sion, and that she is saving characters who wouldn’t listen to her otherwise. Who doesn’t understand that the world is filled with bad people and no one else is willing to take out bad people? (psst, this is the easy driving force for the protagonists to oppose). Dolores’s insecurities come from ignorance. She follows the Minister on blind faith and doesn’t want to be proven wrong. If he fails she sees herself as failing too. In addition, she has internalized intolerance that has built up over time because of the oppression of half-breeds and muggle-borns. She helps write laws that oppress muggle-borns. She makes them submit for questioning. Dolores is happy where she is because her prejudice is a blanket of security for her. She loves her job, and she wants to stay where she is. So when Dumbledore or Harry try to uproot her, she is antagonistic.

The impact of Sion, Dolores, and Anna, is that you end up with characters who do bad things but don’t see themselves as bad people. Anna believes she is doing the work that no one else is willing to do. That she is going after bad guys. Sion believes she is keeping her department alive. That she is looking out for the good of her people. Dolores is serving her ministry. None of these characters are truly evil, but when you present a young upstart who comes out of a factory that gets the spotlight and attention, or a group of ragtag kids who are trying to save as many people as they can regardless of experience because, “you can’t change where you come from,” or a wizard trying to shake down the years of intolerance at the central government, you get antagonism that is natural and makes sense. You get conflict that makes sense not only for the protagonists, but it makes sense for the antagonists to oppose them. That should be your goal when writing a villain. It should make sense for the villain to oppose the protagonist and vice versa, and it shouldn’t be because the villain is evil and that’s it.

Now, to drive these points home further we’re going to break down great villains from the media and discuss why they are successful in the context that we’ve given you. We hope that by explaining these villains in the terms that we’ve just described, the importance of creating villains as characters first will make more sense.

Let’s talk about Azula. She was the first to come up when the Editor and I discussed villains. We as an audience know Azula’s backstory. We know she was “born lucky,” and was beloved and revered by her father and grandfather. We know she had a bad relationship with her mother. We know she had friends. These are all aspects of personality that make Azula someone we can understand. Azula is serving her father and the Fire Nation. It just so happens that that nation is under more evil leadership. When we see the downfall of Azula, we see how the writers used her own insecurities to become her undoing. We see her instead as a deeply paranoid person, who is afraid of being betrayed by people she is supposed to trust. You see her crack under her own pressures. The brilliance of Azula is that we as an audience can relate to her in her downfall, and we see who she is beyond being a bad guy. She’s not like General Zhao, whose motivations and desires were more straightforward. She has complicated goals and wishes and desires that allow us to understand who she is as a person.

Lucifer from Supernatural is another great example of a compelling villain. You see it in his development. He is meant to be the ultimate evil because he is after Sam and wants the end of the world. What the writers on Supernatural did is really explore the why of Lucifer’s actions. You see it in how his brothers talk to him. You see how Lucifer was, “the only one who could see what was going on.” That he couldn’t handle the new baby (mankind) coming home and lashed out. That he was kicked out of heaven by trying to prove that humans weren’t perfect. You see in the actor himself, that Lucifer is given a reason to be angry and a methodology behind his anger. This makes him more compelling as a villain. He isn’t evil just to be evil and he isn’t opposing humanity just to do it, he has a reason behind what he does. It makes us understand him as a character because his anger is relatable.

Loki is often a villain or a love-interest in fanfiction. Sometimes when we’re feeling spicy, he’s a villain turned into a love interest because oh my god growth. Loki is given familial relationships and friendships that help us understand who he is as a character. On top of that, he’s given justifiable anger similar to that of Lucifer’s, which makes him act bad but believe he is in the right. Often when we read Loki fanfiction we see the tortured soul Loki who needs someone who can “understand” and “see him” in ways that his brother of 100-odd years somehow inexplicably cannot. This does not just apply to Loki (see Draco Malfoy, Lucifer, and sometimes Paul Lahote but he isn’t a villain). If you are going to give Loki a family that doesn’t know or understand him, you need to give Loki character traits that said the family wouldn’t know about. Hobbies he likes, activities he enjoys. Often Loki is reduced to reading, but in-depth analysis can allude to his reading being a means of escaping a bad situation. Does he write too? Tell me more. Loki is often reduced to either the tortured soul or the lunatic and he is neither. He is a boy first and foremost, who has been lied to his whole life, who was taken in as a political prop and was shoved aside and made to feel unwanted because he was not the blood son. That kind of stuff stays with a person. It messes you up and puts a lot of negative ideas in your head. From here is the source of Loki’s anger, but don’t say that his family doesn’t know him. They do, what they don’t do is accept or nurture him. The exception to this is Frigga. Loki’s motivations as a villain come from his backstory and the relationship he has with both his father and brother. Where fanfic writers often stumble is this dynamic, which is not one of unfamiliarity but one that lacks acceptance. Loki was ostracized for being different, but that isn’t to say Thor and the Warriors Three didn’t know he was different.

Let’s talk about the Death Eaters. The Death Eaters are a great example of how systemic intolerance shapes a generation. They serve Voldemort out of both fear and loyalty because his power is something that is ingrained in their minds as something that is right. His ideas are perpetuated by Salazar Slytherin and enforced by pureblood families. The Death Eaters are examples of those who grew up in intolerance. They don’t necessarily follow Voldemort because they agree with him, but because their families do, their colleagues and friends do. They are so deep in this life they don’t know how to get out. Look at the obvious discomfort of the Malfoys in books 6 and 7. They clearly don’t want to be there. Death Eaters are way more complex than people give them credit for. If you’re writing Death Eater characters, lean into the Draco Malfoys and the Regulus Blacks of the world. Study how people in cults act and reflect on their time after leaving the cult. These resources will help you write characters that are more compelling than just, ‘Mudbloods suckkkk lmao.’

Because he is so popular as a villain, we’re going to talk about Lucius Malfoy in addition to Death Eaters. Lucius Malfoy’s representation in fanfiction is horribly executed 9 times out of 10. This is because he follows the same fate of many characters that we discussed in Fanfiction 101. Lucius Malfoy is reduced to one-note beats and the most blatant parts of his personality. Because he is a villain, that beat is “I hate mudbloods and love Voldemort.” He’s like one of those MLM moms who are like, “love my God and my Essential Oils.” Lucius Malfoy should not be reduced to MLM moms with Live Laugh Love and internalized misogyny. He is way smarter than that. You don’t become one of Voldemort’s most devoted followers and come back from that without having your wits about you. Lucius is way smarter than what fanfiction writers commonly give him credit for. He’s intelligent. He’s driven. He was a Head Boy in his time at Hogwarts, and he knew how to try and sink his enemies without implicating himself. If you write Lucius Malfoy you need to dip into the cat-and-mouse games that are Lucius's personality. He’s not aggressively evil. He’s quiet. He slips in after the fighting is done and takes what he wants. The best example of this is during Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. Everyone knew that it was Malfoy who slipped Tom Riddle’s diary in Ginny’s cauldron. However, there was no proof. Lucius Malfoy is a careful man, and in fanfiction that needs to be reflected.

Villains are the most important character in your narrative. You need to view them as people. As characters first and as bad guys second. Your OC’s story can be centered around the villain, who should be complex, thought-out, and should have methods behind their madness. The audience needs to understand who your villain is by reading about them, just as much as your OC or side characters.

Next week we’re discussing superpowers. We’ll break down how to make a cool set of superpowers, the common mistakes in superpowers, and give good and cringe examples.

Xoxo, Gossip Girl.

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askthewitchlady · 4 years ago

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Revisions Review

THIS REVIEW WILL CONTAIN SPOILERS

I’d seen the trailers a couple times before deciding to watch this one, There was something I couldn’t quiet put my finger on about it but it annoyed me, I dis’t know why, after watching it, now I know.

Our ‘protagonist’ is just so douchey I could feel it in the trailers.

I’m not even kidding here this guy is Omega level douche from the word go.

Basically a huge chunk of the Shibuya ward in Tokyo is suddenly transported to the year 2388 a world wide Pandemic has decimated humanity leaving only two surviving species, humans of the team ARHV Of whom we only ever meet Milo, but who Have specialised brains that allow them to jump through time and predict the future. And the Revisions, people who where not immune to the pandemic and became bloated monster like creatures who eventually learned to use Machines to support the weight of their bodies. these are commonly referred to as civilians and in order to maintain a level of control they break down human bodies on a cellular level and absorb those new healthy cells to replace what has decayed from the illness.

A lot of this you don’t find out till half way through the series.

STORY TIME

When they where young a group of five friends while on a trip for the summer get separated from one of their number Daisuke who is kidnapped as a result. The kidnapper uses his cell phone to call one of his friends as they wait at his home for news and he tearfully explains if they don’t come alone the kidnapper will kill him as they debate what to do they meet a pink hair woman named Milo who helps them find and save Daisuke before giving them advice which it is later discovered plays an important role in their futures.

She tells Daisuke that a prophecy has told he has a great destiny and must protect everyone. Several years later Daisuke has taken this to such an extreme that he’s constantly causing trouble for his friend by picking fights with people who he perceives as slighting them such as Punching a businessman asking his female friend Marin for directions.

He insists something bad is going to happen it will happen soon and he will be ready he will protect everyone, it’s revealed the five friends have drifted apart because of Daisukes attitude and his only remaining close friend is Keisaku. It’s also revealed that Daiske constantly carries weapons even to school such as a switch blade so he is ‘prepared’ but that he has made no plans for his future like collage or Career choices.

Everyone has resigned to the fact Daisuke is delusional and following a mass text to all five friends Gai leads a confrontation Demanding Daisuke knock it off, Gais twin sisters Lu admits Daisuke has gone to far this time but Daisuke admits he never sent the text. Suddenly there is a pulse and everyone is lifted off the ground for an instant before falling, upon investigation it is revealed a large area of Shibuya has been transported to another time.

after heading to the roof to investigate and try to get a cell phone signal the students including Daisuke and Marin are attacked by a massive robotic monster that kills some students and collects others., While attempting to flee the roof with Marin Daisukes Counsellor Miss Yumiko panics and shuts the door preventing any more students from escaping the roof. Daisuke realises he’s not actually prepared for the situation and thinks he’s about to die when Milo appears attacking the creature.

She doesn't seem to know Daisuke and Marin however after he tells her his name she grabs him and jumps from the roof rappelling to a waiting mechsuit that is apparently coded for his brain.

PROBLEMS

The dog ear girls didn’t need to be dog ear girls. it’s explained that the looks ‘communication vessels’, the only way the revisions can communicate with the people of Shibuya, were selected based on data to encourage empathy in the people they talked with. Sooo we got A tall dark skinned dog ear girl who is overtly sextualized ((The dark skin isn’t the problem By the way it’s the fact that the ONLY dark skinned character in the show is a hyper sexualized woman it’s just wrong in a mecha show full of people in skintight suits she didn’t get a better design)) a dog ear lolita girl, and a walking dog mascot character... yeah....

Daisuke, as I said in the beginning is almost irredeemably Douchy I mean for some he might not be redeemable at all, I thought ok character arch and growth is good, but by episode 9 I had a sneaking suspicion he wasn’t going to learn anything. AND HE DOESN’T the show kind of sandbags his weird hero complex and desperation to ‘protect everyone’ and instead gives it... justification? I dunno how to explain it but basically you never feel like Daisuke learns a lesson from anything he does, not the times he ignores direct orders, or even steals one of the mech suits to help his friend Keisaku find his missing mother.

Daisuke is imprisoned along with Keisaku for stealing the mechs known as string puppets, but while Keisaku comes around to understanding what they did wrong, Daisuke never does instead coming to this pseudo philosophical conclusion of, I understand that others understand me, it was stupid.

when the characters learn that the civilians they have been fighting and killing aren’t monsters but infected human Marin has a major beakdown which you think is going to be like a thing but Nope, an episode later she’s back to smiley giggling Marin, because even though there are six main characters this story isn’t about them it’s about Daisuke and the anime reminds you of that... all... the... time

which is a shame because the other characters when given screen time are really good! Milo is fascinating with her abilities, Gai and Lu as twins have a great dynamic with each other and the others around them. when they first realise a real disaster has happened Gai take Lu to the nearest convenience store to get supplies because he knows the ones in the school won’t be enough.

Marin is a sweety and seeing her bits of character growth are satisfying but rushed because it’s not her story. and Keisaku? OMG this guy gets the shaft!

Not only does he see the horrifying way his mother is dissolved and dies (which was unexpectedly graphic for the show and I was kind of pissed about that) but he’s then killed but not just killed, he’s ‘ripped out of time’ because he doesn't have a special future brain, so the last remaining piece of him is used by the big bad who constructs a body that looks just like Keisaku to taunt Daisuke during the final battle which becomes a massive timeline fight and then Because they became merged and free of the timeline Keisaku Dies while Daiskle lived, The whiney bitch lived but not the best freaking character in the show WTF?

you find out during the climax of the show that the reality was that the prophecy was that Keisaku was actually meant to lead the five friends and you see hints of that through the series where he consistently mediates between characters and works in the background to help move things along as well as offering everyone support even while he’s worried for his mother, he calls people out but is also willing to help them. THAT BEING SAID THERE ARE GOOD THINGS Other then Daisuke all the characters are really interesting, even the teacher who shut the students on the roof later admits that people act on instinct when scared, and that she regrets what she did even actively trying to help the Shibuya survivors.

The plot isn’t bad, a little convoluted at points but not terrible

The 2D animation and 3D rendering is a little different this time around so there were moments I wasn’t sure which was which, unfortunately the weaknesses in the CG rigs eventually gave away but the moments were I really had to look gave me hope for future CG projects.

It’s really easy for a show with timeline shenanigans to just revive everyone so no one dies and there’s no consequences and blah blah blah. This didn’t do that and in fact at the very end there’s a memorial for everyone who died while Shibuya was stuck in 2388 I love happy endings don’t get me wrong but I can appreciate that they didn’t do that here.

FINAL THOUGHTS?

I’m on the fence on this one, I would recommend it t was interesting to watch But you really gotta power through Daisuke and his hero complex, and some of his scenes are really hard to get through with out wanting to smack him through the screen, it’s just a shame he’s the main character. Interestingly because he has the same English VA (Bryce Papenbrook) as Kirito from SAO (which I enjoy don’t @ me) I found myself comparing the two characters and while both of them have this need to protect people and this drive to ensure the ones they care for are safe even to the point of self sacrifice in the dangerous situations they find themselves in. Kiritos comes off more genuine. so the younger guy from the pseudo fantasy harem Anime is way more mature then the Highschool kid who knows he has a responsibility and a destiny (supposedly)

If you’re a fan of Mech battles you might enjoy it, if you like lots of intersecting plot lines you might like it. It’s got it’s goods and bads and the goods are really good, the problem is the Main Bad is the Main Character which is probably the reason I won’t watch it again.

Great concept, amazing side characters, okish ending... really really really terrible protagonist.

#Revisions #Anime #Anime reveiw #netflix #netflix reveiw #spoilers #Daisuke #Keisaku #Marin #Gai #Lu #Marin is best girl

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minttoy · 5 years ago

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Song and Steel

Summary: “Annette can never how slowly, and then somehow all at once, he became someone to lose.” - Annette and Felix through the war. Missing scenes post time skip

Pairings: Felix/Annette

Click here to read on FF.net.

Click here to read on AO3.

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Annette never meant to lose her composure, especially in battle.

It starts when she inflicts the final blow on the Gloucester heir – a quick gale casted for a counter. Had she known it would leave Lorenz at death’s door, she might not have done it. Her professor’s words suddenly throb in her head: Kill or be killed. She finds little comfort in the saying, because Annette doesn’t have Byleth’s mercenary background or ironed mindset. Instead, all she thinks is ‘What have I done?’ and she repeats it to herself like a mantra.

“Annette!” Someone is calling her from behind. She can’t distinguish above the noise.

She starts forward at a run, stumbling over dead bodies and slipping when her foot catches the end of a lance in her path. When she gets to him, she makes quick work to haul Lorenz’s body off his fallen steed and lay him flat on the ground. She doesn’t know when her arms became strong enough to drag a bloodied man almost twice her size out of tangled heap, but she shows no signs of stopping.

She tries to rouse him, checks his pulses, searches for signs of life – anything – but his blood just coats more of her hands.

“Annette, you idiot! Get out of there!”

When she looks up, Felix is too close. In a hurry, he catches her around the waist and starts pulling her backwards. When she pushes against him, he has to hook his arm around her chest to hold her back.

“He’s gone!” he shouts in her ear, because she’s still squirming.

“No! At least let me-”

A demonic beast is nearby. Fire is heaved and belched in their direction, setting the wooden rafters and planks and grounds ablaze. Suddenly the world is ignited in flame. She coughs twice as noxious fumes and smoke penetrate the air around them. Heat blankets her face as a nearby pillar catches fire. It cracks and falls, blocking her path to Lorenz’s body, and she would have been caught in the destruction if not for-

A light-headedness suddenly overcomes her.

She feels her knees buckle, arms fall limp and then she slackens in his arms. Her mind is too shocked to think clear, much less chide herself for recklessness. Felix lets out a heavy sigh from behind. She knows because she feels his chest move and his breath grazes her cheek.

A moment later, she’s pulled to her feet. His touch is considerably gentler, less forceful.

“Come on,” he pipes up, quickly appraising her balance when he lets go.

She has no choice but to listen. When he takes her arm, she lets him lead.

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War is a nightmare of itself, but taking down familiar faces is a different horror. After the battle, Annette ruminates the thought as she kneels down by Lorenz’s body, still distinguishable in spite of the burns and charred skin. She offers him a moment of silence because it’s all she can do. She whispers a soft prayer because it makes her feel better.

Felix stands beside her, arms crossed and gaze focused on the ground. Whether he’s here begrudgingly or not, she does not know, but his presence and patience are small comforts.

When she rises to stand, Felix meets her eyes with wary anticipation.

She sighs. “…I guess there’s no turning back.”

He shakes his head.

The image of his corpse is already burned in her mind. A shiver tracks her spine. “Could we ever get over something like this?” she adds, more as an afterthought.

He shrugs. “I doubt it, but maybe ask me again later, when the war is over.”

Having accepted the fact, she holds her hands between them so he can see them too. Like pouring alcohol over a festered wound, she flips over her palms and stares at the blood-soaked gloves. She winces and flashes a pained expression, digesting the awful sight. She knows she’ll carry this guilt for life.

“Are you okay?”

She pulls her gloves by the fingers first before removing them completely. To her horror, the blood is soaked even to the skin of her hands. Damn. A shadow falls on her face and a sigh escapes her lips. She tucks those gloves deep into her pocket, out of sight, but not out of mind.

“I will be,” she says, attempting some level of optimism, even though her voice is weary. It occurs to her that she’s killed before – a multitude of times, too. In theory, this time should be no different. It seems pathetic, in hindsight, how easily she lost herself when she’s casted storms to rain down her enemies before. She laughs at herself a little, hollow as it is. “…I’m sorry. I don’t know what got into me. When I saw him on the ground, I just wanted to save him so badly...I didn’t mean for you to-”

“Stop.”

She raises him a brow. She forgets the words on her tongue once she sees his softened features, a rare sight to behold.

“What’s done is done. You did what you had to. I don’t want to hear excuses or apologies, especially not for my sake,” he tells her point-blank. He’s never been a man of soft words anyway, not that she expected him to offer any. It’s a tough, sturdy kind of comfort. Sometimes it offers more than soothing words can afford.

“Thank you, then,” she says, mirroring his softened gaze. If he won’t accept her apologies, he might as well accept her thanks.

“Sure,” he scoffs before turning away, which is the most acknowledgement she’ll get out of him.

He stays by her side, and she’s grateful.

----------

“Professor?”

Annette peeks into the Captain’s Quarters. After the battle at the bridge, Byleth has quietly taken to moving all her things to Jeralt’s old room. Annette thinks her Professor can no longer bear the thought of sleeping in the student dormitories anymore, but it’s only speculation. Her professor remains a wild conundrum, even now.

“Come in.”

Byleth’s attention is focused largely on paperwork, brows creasing as her eyes flit across the paper. Annette can only assume the document is highly vexing, but she puts it away in a flash and sets down her feather quill, eyes now trained to her student. Her expression is blank and seemingly cold and there are traces of darkness under her eyes. When Annette asks if she slept last night, Byleth dismisses her concern.

“Professor, I’m looking for advice. In our last battle, I…well, you see, I did something that I’m not sure I can…”

Somehow, her point gets across.

The professor sighs softly. “Annette, I apologize you had to experience that. I understand it’s difficult engaging in battle with former classmates and peers,” she starts, tone neutral, robotic even, in spite of her words. “Awful as it is, you will never forget it. Believe me, I’ve also taken down foes who were once my friends.”

“I know. I just wish it didn’t have to end like that,” she tells honestly.

Byleth’s eyes darken suddenly and for a moment, Annette fears she spoke out of line.

“You regret it now, but a harsh lesson I must teach you is that war does not discriminate between you and your enemies,” Byleth says so evenly, as if she’s giving one of her lectures. Annette doesn’t notice how hard she clenches a fist under the desk. “It will take one after the other, and if you are lucky, you owe it to yourself to live another day.”

Hmm. That’s one way to put it.

Annette knows her Professor isn’t one for soothing words either. It is most apparent when she handles Dimitri’s outbursts and violent tendencies with a certain hardiness. He needs someone like that – someone to set him in place, not coddle and feed his murderous fantasies. People seem to think it’s her job as his teacher. Annette knows it goes beyond that. Her father mentioned once how forgiving someone’s darkness implies a love beyond measure. She thinks Dimitri loves her too, even if he doesn’t know it yet.

When Byleth asks if she has any other questions, Annette shakes her head. The rest of her day is spent kneeling by the church pews, as most people do when they have sins to repent.

----------

It’s almost sunset. Her father is usually here by now.

Lately they’ve been spending dinners with each other. It’s always a quiet affair and food rations from the kitchens are never tasty, but it’s taken a long time to get here. Gustave used to brush her off with a blankness that rivalled even the professor’s mercenary gaze. He is distant and haunted even now, but she refuses to be deterred. Somewhere along the push and pull, they’ve agreed to make things work. At the end of the day, she’s just grateful he no longer denies being her father.

After a few more minutes, Annette gets up and looks for him. She starts with his usual haunts: greenhouse, fishing dock, marketplace. Up next is the knight’s hall. She’s not looking to stay so she slips in quietly.

“Father? Are you- Bah!” Her eyes connect with a sharp navy blue pair and she reacts with alarm. Automatically, she straightens her spine and bows at the waist, as she would to any duke of Faerghus. “I-I’m so sorry for intruding! Lord Rodrigue, I should have knocked before entering. Please forgive me.”

He’d been in the middle of sorting documents and letters when she entered. Truly, he’s baffled by her insistent apology more than anything. When Annette looks back up, his expression molds into one of mild interest. He stands and abandons his work on the table.

“No need for apologies, Miss Dominic. Your presence is quite welcome, in fact.”

Her gaze is tinged with confusion. “…Pardon?”

He suppresses the urge to chuckle at her nervous energy. “You haven’t seen my son, have you?”

Annette fidgets with the ends of her gloves, thinking it’s been a long while since she’s seen Felix at all. “Err, I’m afraid not.”

She finds no disappointment on Rodrigue’s end. Rather, his gaze wanders in quiet contemplation. “He was supposed to meet me here for a spar,” he explains, not with any dismay or setback. “Sometimes, I find it’s the only way I can get him to speak with me.”

“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that.” Her expression is largely wooden, only because she doesn’t know what to make of it. Felix has openly expressed his distaste for his father before, but she figured some of it had to do with his own stubbornness. He had a penchant for petty behaviour back then.

“Well, Felix can be quite fixed in his ways sometimes. I’m sure you know that as his classmate,” he reflects, maintaining a warm tone of voice despite their talk. He nudges his head in Annette’s direction, shifting course. “How are things between you and your father, by the way?”

She lights up. “It’s better, actually. We fight alongside each other and share dinners…Lately we’ve been catching up on the lost years. I’m glad we found each other when we did.”

He shoots her a fond smile of approval. “I hope you continue to remain positive, my dear. Gustave has a troubled past, but he means well. He also loves you more than anything. In fact, he let me know the other day how proud he is to see how strong you’ve become.”

She flushes a little, taking the compliment in stride. It feels nice to hear it from someone else. She understands it will take a while before her father is comfortable enough to say it directly to her.

Annette catches Rodrigue getting a glimpse of the clock, no doubt wondering whether his son has forgotten their meeting altogether. In secret, Annette hopes Felix isn’t that cruel. She knows the weight and burden of a strained relationship herself, but forgiveness is difficult too.

Rodrigue sighs softly. “Perhaps he’s not showing up,” he concedes. This time, the disappointment in his voice is more palpable, as much as he tries to hide it. He tips his head towards her with a raised brow. “…I hope he’s not giving you the same kind of trouble.”

She shakes her head resolutely. “Oh. He’s no trouble at all, actually.”

It’s Rodrigue’s turn to be surprised and his curious expression begs for an explanation.

Unconsciously, her fingers start worrying with the edge of her shawl. She doesn’t know if her cheeks are flushed pink or red, only knows she generally feels hot. “Felix, well…he’s kind to me, for the most part. I owe him a lot. He’s saved my life more times than I can count too. It’s actually kind of embarrassing.”

Rodrigue gazes with keen interest. “Is that true?”

“Of course,” she insists, and not just because she’s talking to his father. “He works so hard, especially with his training. Seeing him on the grounds everyday makes me want to become stronger.”

“How enlightening,” the man comments, quietly musing to himself. “You speak highly of him.”

She looks at him strange, thinking she has no other to speak otherwise. A lot of teasing and playful banter is exchanged between them, but she’s never mistaken any of it for cruelty.

“I suppose it’s fitting…” continues Rodrigue, her confusion going unnoticed. He puts a hand to his chin in contemplation. “You should know he speaks highly of you too.”

Annette did not know it was possible her face could heat up more, but it does. Her colour must be beet red by now. Embarrassed, she looks away to salvage any sort of control. She doesn’t notice Rodrigue chuckling at her unexpected predicament. Oddly enough, Felix teases her the same way just to get that reaction.

She startles with a yelp when the double doors swing wide open, rushing in a breeze of cool air. Felix waltzes in casually despite the awkward atmosphere, raises a brow at the pair and unceremoniously drops his weapons on one side of the room. Annette almost smiles in relief, and observes as he gets to work, quickly dusting his hands with powder before moving to the sword rack.

He shoots a pointed gaze at his father first. “Spilling all my secrets, old man?”

“Why, I would never,” Rodrigue says wryly, feigning an offended expression. “Am I not allowed to have pleasant conversation with one of your peers?”

It earns him an eye roll. “…Right.”

Annette eyes Felix in particular, thinking this kind of banter would have no place if he harboured so much hatred. Soon, he catches her staring, but she doesn’t look away.

“Annette.” He says her name so dryly, as to not suggest anything between them. It goes without saying how aware he is of his dad standing across the room. “I ran into your father in the dining hall. He’s waiting for you.”

She lights up in remembrance. “Ah, that’s right!” Her posture straightens up and she bows, mostly to Rodrigue, before turning to Felix. “I’ll…see you later?”

He nods curtly, masking his desperation to get her out of his father’s prying eyes. Even now, he won’t hear the end of it. Maybe she caught on, or maybe she didn’t, but she scurries out of there not a moment longer. Felix lets out a sigh of relief when she does and doesn’t miss the grin on Rodrigue’s face as he readies for a spar.

“Sweet girl,” he comments, shrugging off his coat and drawing his own blade.

Felix cannot tell if he’s teasing as a father would, or trying to lower his guard. “I would prefer if you keep out of my business.”

“Who says I’m meddling?”

He sighs in annoyance and unsheathes his sword. Felix is short-tempered to begin with, but Rodrigue could grate his nerves with a single look. Every moment like this resembles how they used to be, as if things could work out after all.

----------

Fate won’t have it.

Rodrigue falls in the next battle. He goes down the same way as Glenn and for a short moment, Felix despises the goddess for saddling his family with such an atrocious destiny; sacrificing themselves in the name of their king, or in this case, the boar. He’d be damned if he went out like that, not because he doesn’t care for the prince, but because Dimitri better get his grip on reality soon and start fending for himself. Even now, the man is still spewing insanity and nonsense from his teeth.

Felix doesn’t shed a single tear. All he can do is grit his teeth and bear it, even as the last words from his father is a whispered and choked-up apology.

Some distance away, Annette watches with grief, remembering how they used to bond over these things. Rodrigue and Gustave were hardly present and yet, she came to Garreg Mach in search for him. Felix scoffed at her, questioning how she could house a heart of forgiveness when she’d been intentionally ignored. He couldn’t fully grasp the concept at the time.

But Annette sees it on his face now, the way his eyes crinkle in pain and his hands clench in tight fists, that he understands it better.

----------

A week later, Felix is still unreachable. He spends his days sulking in the training grounds. Dimitri sulks in the church. He tells Sylvain to pass the message that he refuses to be consoled or coddled. As he takes out his frustrations on training dummies, he can’t seem to forget his stupid father, dying with regret and leaving this world with an apology. Felix thinks it would have been easier if he made no effort at all in the past five years.

Fuck.

He’s interrupted sometimes. Those who don’t know him usually scurry away. Sylvain stops by to bring him food from the kitchen, which looks like gruel nowadays. Mercedes stopped by once to heal his wounds. Today, it’s Ingrid who opens the door.

He thinks she’s here to scold him, nag him or drag him out for lunch. She acts so motherly even if she won’t admit it, but she surprises him today. Silently, she takes a lance from the rack and offers to spar.

He knows early in the fight that every strike and attack of hers is touched with anger. The unspoken person in the room is undoubtedly Glenn. Recently, she’s been reconsidering what it means to be a knight, no longer clouded with chivalrous tales and noble attributes. Both Rodrigue and Glenn had died with pain and regrets.

When they’re both bruised and catching their breath, she drops her weapon first.

He tips his head towards her. “Still intent on becoming a knight?”

Ingrid laughs, but it’s flat and empty. “Of course.” Then she withdraws from battle, stepping back and putting her weapon away. Before she turns on her heel, she looks over her shoulder and gives him a quick onceover. He can’t hide from her inspecting gaze.

“Felix, don’t overdo it. Please? I fear you’ll get reckless,” she says after a while.

Ah, there it is.

He scoffs, “I was waiting for you to say something like that.”

She doesn’t smile, not in the mood to joke. “I’m serious. If you die on the battlefield too, I won’t forgive you,” she says, which is her roundabout way of telling him she cares.

----------

Annette attempts to visit him the next day. Sylvain finds her sitting on the bench outside the knight’s hall. She’s leaning back, staring at the sunset hues of the sky, legs straightened out in front of her and a small box sitting precariously on her lap. A blank gaze graces her features.

“Annette?”

She jumps and startles. He’s about to dive for the sliding box until she secures it with her hands. She straightens up in her seat, eyes darting around until they settle on him. She exhales a small breath. “Oh, Sylvain. You frightened me.”

“How long have you been sitting here?” he asks, because the evening chill is starting to set and she looks paler than usual.

“Haha, I don’t know actually…” she answers sheepishly, rubbing the back of her neck. “I must have gotten carried away.”

Sylvain’s eyes shift from her to the knight’s hall. He might act a bumbling fool most of the time, but he dissects the situation easy enough. “Let me guess, you paid our good friend Felix a visit?”

She nods her head and gestures to her gift. “I went into town today and bought some goodies for him. The kitchen hasn’t been serving anything tasty as of late, so I picked out some meats and grabbed a few rolls of bread. Nothing sweet or covered in chocolate, of course.”

The redhead grins at that. Felix should consider himself lucky, because he hardly deserve her kindness. “That’s awfully kind of you. How come it’s still sitting in your hands?”

“He told me to leave his sight.”

She says it so bluntly Sylvain almost chokes on his saliva. He coughs and clears his throat, and Annette just shoots him an oblivious gaze. “Well, that’s rude of him,” he says when he finally gets his bearings. “I suppose he’s still being a jerk then. If you want, I could give him a piece of my mind?”

She chuckles, and then shakes her head. “Thanks, but that won’t be necessary. I don’t think he’s ready yet. Maybe I should have been more patient instead.”

Sylvain resists the urge to roll his eyes. Felix, with his brash and condescending nature, doesn’t deserve this at all. What’s worse is he’s being difficult about it. Pushing away the thought, he molds his gaze to become kinder. “You know, I figured if anyone could reach him, it would be you.”

“Hmm?” Annette tilts her head curiously at him. “Why do you say that?”

Sylvain backpedals a little. “He warms up easier to you. With us, he’s more stubborn.”

“Oh, I see,” she accepts with ease. She gulps in her throat, and he recognizes she’s withholding something at the tip of her tongue. “Hey, you don’t think…he’s not overworking himself, is he?”

“Nah, I think he’ll be fine,” he reassures, not with a measure of doubt. Felix has his self-destructive ways, but he’s never spiralled out of control, not like Dimitri. Funny how some people think Sylvain is the least stable of the three of them. “Trust me. He acted the same way when Glenn died, and he turned around.”

Annette smiles, believing him. “Thank you.”

“You seem to care for him a whole lot.”

“Of course I do,” she says, flushing a light pink. It leaves Sylvain wondering when she became so bold about admitting to such things.

There’s a sound from behind. A heavy wooden door opening, and the clack of boots following. Felix emerges from the knight’s hall, looking dragged and worn. When his gaze cuts to the redhead first, his expression becomes annoyed. “Ugh, I knew it was you running your mouth out here.”

“Nice seeing you coming out of your shell,” Sylvain comments too casually, not interested in treating him with caution at all. Then again, Felix refuses to be talked with any hint of consolation or pity. “You done sulking yet or what?”

The dark-haired male just scoffs and turns to Annette, who’s standing now and clutching her offering between her arms. “You’re still here?”

She pouts, showing him her own stubbornness. “I told you I wasn’t leaving.”

The moment is followed by silence where the two of them just…stare at each other.

Sylvain’s about to interject and tease him again, but he quickly realizes what’s going on. He’s played this game before – the first to look away loses. A strange, but intimate way of arguing. Felix can easily take this one because he’s a petty and stubborn mule, but Sylvain pays special attention to Annette. Her lip quivers and she can’t hold her pout for much longer.

To his surprise, Felix submits first. He sighs and tips his head towards the room. “Get in. You’ll catch a cold sitting out here,” he says without a trace of softness.

She grins at her small victory and scurries inside because she’s shivering. She nods a small thanks to him when he opens the door for her. Before following after, he raises Sylvain a brow, particularly to the lopsided grin tugging the corner of his lips.

“What was that?”

“What was what?” Felix is stubborn as always, not that he expects any different.

Sylvain notices he’s still holding the door open.

“You coming in?”

The redhead shakes his head. “And interrupt precious time with your girl? I think I’ll pass. Besides, third-wheeling isn’t really my thing, as you know.”

Felix puts a hand to his face and drags it all the way down. He peeks behind him in search for Annette, relieved she probably didn’t hear any of that. When he looks back at Sylvain, he’s already sauntering away.

“Treat her nice, Felix. She’s taking care of you after all.”

----------

Later, when the muscles in his arm ache from swinging his sword, he joins her at the table by the fireplace. She’s laid out a small feast for them, and sits in deep thought. When he approaches, she snaps out of her reverie. He quietly reminds himself to ask later what weighs heavy on her mind.

“Hungry?” she chirps.

He plops down on the seat in front of her with a grunt. “Starving.”

For some reason, she smiles at that. He reaches for the one of the bread rolls, breaks it in half and takes one in his mouth. It’s less stale than the ones they serve from the kitchen, but then he notices quickly she’s not taking any for herself. He’s about to ask why, but she breaks silence first.

“Felix, I always wondered…” she says, that faraway look in her eyes again. “What was your dad like?”

He squirms in discomfort, but hides it. He lets the silence go on for too long anyway.

“Sorry,” she says, withdrawing her hands from the table and onto her lap. “I shouldn’t have asked.”

He shakes his head. “No, it’s just…now is not the right time. Once the war is over, I’ll tell you everything you want to know.”

That evokes a small smile out of her. She gazes at him earnestly because she hopes he’ll remember. “Is that a promise?”

He nods stiffly. “I promise.”

----------

Dimitri finally turns around. No one is probably happier than their professor, even if it doesn’t show on her face. He offers his formal apologies to his peers and friends, and again to his beloved teacher. Felix thinks it was nice hearing it the first time, but irritating the second and third time.

Even when the meeting is over, Dimitri follows him out the door and requests to speak with him. Considering the death of Rodrigue, Dimitri feels Felix is owed an extra apology.

“Felix, I must apologize again for my untoward behaviours. Words are all I have to offer, empty as they may be, but please tell me what I must do to make it up to you because I am, once again, indebted to you and your family.”

He rolls his eyes. Dimitri will follow him around and beg if he has to, so Felix saves him the trouble. It would prove more troublesome if it came down to that.

“To start, it’s annoying to see you reduced to grovelling,” he scoffs, unafraid of being honest. “If this is what the boar prince of Faerghus looks like, then the future is bleak.”

Dimitri actually smiles at the familiarity of it. “Perhaps I could make it up to you with a spar?”

“Hmph. Sure you could beat me? I’ve seen you let your guard down too many times.”

The blonde has a small change of heart, raising a brow at the challenge. “Perhaps it’s unwise to underestimate me? You have better speed, but I’m certain I have strength on my side.”

Felix huffs. He’s referring to his size, of course. Dimitri has always had the physical advantage when they fight. He’s taller than Sylvain now too, towering over most of them like a mountain, or a roof over a house. Even without his shabby cloak, the man appears imposing and enormous.

“I’ve taken down beasts like you before,” he jests, throwing in a casual shrug to tick him off.

Dimitri’s lone eye twitches. He’s surprised by how quickly they’re slipping back to their old ways. Always bickering and challenging one another. Simple conversations turning into pissing contests. Settling things with their weapons instead of their words.

“Besides, strength isn’t everything. If it were that easy, I would have done it myself,” Felix continues, following up with a shake of his head. “Even five years past, you still don’t know a lick of magic.”

Dimitri shrugs, a smirk tugging at his lips. “I doubt I would need it to defeat you.”

“Are you willing to test that out?”

“Well, I offered to spar, did I not?” Dimitri only wears a smug expression because he knows it gets under his skin. Rivalry has always been part of their friendship, after all. “We could settle it this evening and determine the results of our training then.”

Felix snorts, and then barely suppresses his laughter. “By ‘training’, do you mean the past few months you spent standing in front of the church rubble?”

Dimitri chortles, but he’s hardly fazed. “To be fair, I have spent the last five years on the battlefield.”

“Yes, and now you wear an eyepatch,” he retorts easily. “Unless it’s for show, I fail to see your point.”

The prince crinkles at the insult, but he’s still smirking underneath. “Oof, that one hurts.”

He shrugs. “It’s only your pride. Just wait till we get on the training grounds.”

They settle it there. Felix turns his heel and starts to leave the room. At the door, he pauses to hurl his parting words. Dimitri is still listening and waiting for him to say it.

“Keep yourself in line, Dimitri. That’s what my father asked of you before he died. Don’t make his sacrifice in vain. Personally, I don’t intend on dying to save your ass, so don’t let it come to that.”

----------

Fhirdiad, the crown jewel and capital city of Faerghus, is finally theirs again. It took a monumental effort on their part, worthy of a celebratory feast. There’s music and dancing. Lively conversation and laughter. Wine and liquor are being passed amongst the soldiers, so it’s bound to end in some sort of disaster.

When the server offers to fill his glass, Felix declines. Sylvain, rowdier than usual and drunker than most, passes him a full glass of whiskey before demanding him to loosen up.

Annette sits beside him and sneaks a glance every now and then. He still wears his perpetual scowl even in celebration, but part of it is irritation for the redhead’s antics on his other side. By the time dessert arrives, Sylvain is halfway done telling his exaggerated tales of bravery on the battlefield when he gets up and asks a vexed Ingrid for a dance. When he’s rejected, he pulls Mercedes instead, who doesn’t have the heart to refuse.

Annette, on the other hand, revels and savours each and every bite of her cake. They hardly serve desserts at the monastery, and nothing ever reaches this level of sugary sweetness. To no one’s surprise, she gobbles it up in minutes. When he notices she’s done, Felix nudges his serving in her direction. The expression of gratitude that flashes across her eyes is delightful. It warms his heart, even if he won’t admit it.

“Say, Felix…” she starts, spooning the frosting off the top of the cake. “Ever think about the future? You know, after the war is finished.”

“Nope,” is his short and curt answer.

She raises him a brow, wondering if he’s being difficult, or he legitimately has not given it any thought. For now, she’ll take his word for it. “I suppose it’s not that complicated,” she muses out loud, mindlessly picking at her plate. Somehow her mind always goes back to this. “When the war is over, Dimitri will ascend the throne. Some of us will have to do the same in our house.”

The two of them included, of course. Sometimes Annette forgets her nobility, much less that she’s heir to the house after her uncle passes. It’s been easy to brush it off because of the war.

“Does it upset you?” he asks pointedly.

She shrugs and pushes away the thought. Felix knows she’ll assume her cheery façade in no time. “No, but it’s just…don’t you have dreams or wishes? Things you wish you could do, but maybe you’re not allowed?”

He raises a brow, but he has an inkling of where she’s going with this. “Is there something you want to do?”

Annette sighs pensively. “Sometimes I think about becoming a teacher,” she admits, staring up at the ceiling. Mercedes has told her it’s far from unrealistic, but the war has dampened her hopes.

“I’ve always loved the school atmosphere,” she continues, remembering her academy days. Some people forget she was enrolled in another school before she joining the monastery. “Sometimes, I imagine what it’s like standing at a desk and explaining the basics of magic and spellcasting. I would have students of my own and I would treat them all equally, even the grumpy ones that don’t want to learn. I wouldn’t mind that for the rest of my life. Does that sound silly?”

When she tilts her head to him, his gaze is surprisingly tender. “Not at all. To be fair, I’m more surprised you don’t dream of becoming a singer or songwriter.”

He fully expects her to pout or nudge him on the shoulder, but she just laughs. He likes the sound of it; merry and bell-like. “I can’t say I haven’t thought about it,” she tells honestly. “But I think I prefer to keep the hobby to myself, so don’t go around telling people.”

Annette has grown rather comfortable with the fact that he knows her secret. In quiet moments, she’s even allowed herself to hum a few tunes, scribble down lyrics and sing in his presence.

“A teacher, huh?” He considers the thought only briefly. “…I think you would enjoy it. Maybe one day, you’ll get to do just that.”

When she smiles, it reaches her eyes. Felix has supported every decision she’s made since she’s known him. It’s odd, considering what people say of him.

“Maybe,” she echoes. “At the very least, I’ll want to pass my knowledge onto my own children, if I’m ever lucky.”

He snorts. “Children? You already think that far ahead?”

She shoots him her usual pout this time. “Of course I do. You don’t?”

“Not when the war is still raging.”

She narrows her eyes at him in suspicion. “Is that just your way of saying you don’t want any?”

He chuckles at her expression and then shakes his head. “No. What I’m saying is that you should probably save a question like that for later. There’s no point asking it now.”

Her lips tug to a smirk, because she’s heard this promise before. “Maybe when the war is over?”

Felix knows it too, because he’s smiling as well. She’s adding it to her list as they speak, but a dark thought flashes – maybe there won’t be time after the war. If it came down to the two of them, he’d be damned if he makes it out and not her. All his promises would be empty.

“You better not die before then,” she pipes up, and even though her cheeks are half-stuffed with cake, she means it seriously. “I’ll be upset if you do. You’ll never get to hear the swamp beastie song either.”

He snorts and wonders how she read his mind just now. Of all things, he would hate to miss out on her singing too. “Hmph. That would be a shame. I suppose we’ll both have to make it out then.”

----------

Enbarr is a messy affair.

After a blistering effort, all the Empire soldiers have either fallen or retreated on their own accord. Dimitri enters Edelgard’s throne room to settle the war’s end and Felix takes the chance to clutch at a hastily bandaged cut above his shoulder to stop it from bleeding. He doesn’t bother calling Mercedes. She’s busy with dealing with a graver injury; Ingrid had nothing to cushion her fall when her Pegasus was shot down as she set off. She’s lucky to escape with a few fractures.

Sylvain stands nearby with a worried look. Ashe waits in silence with Dedue. Annette is nowhere in sight, but she’d been paired up with her dad. He reminds himself to find her later and make sure she’s uninjured. Goddess knows she can be more stubborn than he is at times.

When Dimitri emerges from the throne room, he nods to his peers. It’s the only signal they need. The Empire is finished, and just like that, they arrive at the moment they’ve long dreamed and waited, except it doesn’t end with raucous cheering and celebration. The sound of silence reigns above all.

Dimitri appears distraught more than anything. Beside him, Byleth’s expression is unreadable, but more so than usual.

Felix lets his gaze wanders aimlessly across the blood-stained palace, thinking now would be a good time for rest. The last thing he remembers before his vision turns black is the evening sky.

----------

When he finally comes to, his mind latches to the sound of humming. A sweet, lilting tune. He knows that sound from anywhere.

With a groan, he blinks the blur out of his eyes. Despite the steady throb in his head, ribs and legs, he pushes himself up anyway. The humming stops and her hand goes to his back to help him sit. He fixes her a soft gaze, thinking he wouldn’t mind waking up like this every morning and she’s the first thing he sees.

“You idiot,” is the first thing she says, naturally. Her smile is quickly replaced with a more serious expression to match her scolding. He braces himself for her reprimand. “You’re lucky, you know that? You lost a lot of blood out there. Thank goodness we found you when we did, otherwise you would be dead. Why didn’t you say anything?”

He’s hurt her. Just for that, he supposes he deserves it. “I’m sorry.”

Her lips quiver, but her anger doesn’t hold out for much longer. With him, it wasn’t meant to last. Annette can never fathom how slowly, and then somehow all at once, he became someone to lose.

“Don’t do it again,” she says, sounding defeated.

Felix softens his gaze. “I won’t.”

It’s all she needs to hear. She exhales deeply and sits at his side to embrace him. Her arms are shaking, he realizes. She’s desperate to feel him, and hear his heart beating. He doesn’t have the heart to tell her she’s pressing against one of his wounds, so he just rubs her back to soothe her.

When she pulls away, a smile graces her features once again.

“How long do I have to stay here?” he can’t help but ask. It’s nice they pitched a medical tent for him, but as far as his injuries go, he’d rather be out and about than be bound to a makeshift bed.

“Couple of days, probably,” she says. His expression sours, and she pokes him on the cheek. “Hey now, I was the one who healed you. I’m not about to let you waste my efforts.”

He scoffs, “I promise I’ll be careful.”

She’s still shaking her head, unfortunately. “Nope. Nice try, but you’re staying here until you get better. Besides, I know you, Felix. You’re itching to go back to the training grounds as we speak.”

He harrumphs like a petulant child. If he crossed his arms too, he could be mistaken for one. She takes it as a sign that his recovery is well in motion.

Afterwards, she updates him on the war’s end. Who’s alive and who’s not. How their classmates are faring – alive, but not entirely whole. Dimitri in a rough mental shape, but not spiralling as he once was. The Professor seems to be missing, claiming she has matters to investigate about the war’s origins. Even at a time of rest, she does not stop.

When Felix asks about her plans, her tone shifts slightly. She takes his hand and wraps it in hers.

“I’m going home to visit my mom. My father’s coming with me, actually.” She says it with a certain glee. A sense of pride, too. He’s proud of her as well, because she’s been wanting this since their days at the academy.

“When do you leave?”

“Tomorrow.”

He inhales and exhales. By instinct, he squeezes her hand tighter. She chuckles at his reaction.

“We’ll see each other again, dummy,” she says, as if reading his mind. “There’s a lot I have to ask you now that the war is over. Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten.”

He smirks at the throwback and they talk until sundown when he’s hit with a wave of exhaustion. He knows when he wakes tomorrow, she’ll be gone like a distant dream, so he doesn’t let her go until she promises to write to him. How odd that he’s never given her a confession, and yet he’s comfortable requesting as such. She jokes that he’s becoming soft, but consents to the idea when he promises to do the same. After that, he memorizes her face and kisses the back of her hand. When he falls asleep, he hopes he dreams of her.

“Finally the world is at peace…” she whispers to herself, when she thinks he’s sleeping.

There’s silence, and then, very softly, she starts to sing.

----------

Dimitri’s coronation is three months later.

It will mark their first reunion since the war’s end. Most of them returned to their homes to resume their positions, help restoration efforts or bury the dead.

When the ceremony is underway, Annette stands with her father and uncle to represent the Dominic household. She spies Mercedes sitting at the front with Ashe and silently gives her a wave. In the front, Dimitri stands with the other dukes, most of them young and newly inducted. Felix and Sylvain are among them. Byleth stands by the throne too. She’s taken the role of the archbishop, but Annette likes to think she’s still their professor at heart.

Annette deliberately stares at new king of Faerghus. It’s obvious he still needs Byleth and that he depends on her – everyone depends on her, she’s the head of the church after all – but for him, it goes deeper than that. It’s as if he relies on her to keep him going, day after day. Like she’s all that holds him together.

It’s endearing to watch. Annette had been right about her suspicions all along.

Later, she wades through the crowd to find one of the people she’s missed the most. When she finds him, she lights up. Seeing him certainly feels like coming home. There’s a small crinkle in his eye when he finds her too. He barely gets out his snarky ‘hello’ when she takes his hand and pulls him outdoors for more privacy.

“Hasty, aren’t you?” he comments, even though he doesn’t resist.

Annette lets him go when there are no prying eyes to intervene. “You can stop me anytime, Duke Fraldarius,” she greets teasingly. She throws in a small curtsy when she pronounces his title.

He scoffs in mild disgust. “Ugh, I’ll have none of that.”

She laughs, warm and familiar. “Did you miss me?”

He wobbles his hand in uncertainty. “Meh. I hardly noticed you were gone,” he teases back.

She hits him on the shoulder, and then he catches her hand in his. “That’s too bad. I wanted to make it up to you.”

“Oh? And how are you planning to do that?”

She hums and muses out loud, “I could offer you a spar?”

“I think I’ve got enough soldiers at home to spar with.”

“What if I sing you a song then?”

He remembers the sound of her voice, all of a sudden. Soft lullabies she sang before he fell asleep. Strange lyrics she penned to distract him from war. Her soft voice offering peace to the screams in his sleep. When he looks at her and studies her face, he’s reminded of the small things she did to sustain him.

Impulsively, Felix leans closer, heart racing furiously in his chest.

She meets him halfway.

The kiss is soft, tentative and clumsy. It takes a moment to orient themselves to each other, but it hardly matters. He smells clean, not like resin or metal. She tastes like the bubbling champagne they served at the hall. Warmth unfurls in her chest and she grips the front of his shirt tighter when she realizes how much she’s missed him.

When they pull away, she smiles and tries to memorize the details of his face.

“I’m glad you’re alive,” she says the first thing in her mind. She’s acutely aware of how offbeat and un-romantic it sounds, but in a post-war period, it seems fitting. In return, he just chuckles.

He doesn’t say anything back, still not much for soft and soothing words. Instead, he pulls her again and kisses her deeper until all her senses and thoughts are filled with him.

Finally, they live in a world that knows peace. She looks forward to telling him stories, singing to him, getting him to laugh or smile, and asking him all the hard questions, but for now, this is enough.

----------

Thanks for reading! I paired these two up in my play through and it was worth it. I loved them so much I put it into writing. If you’ve made it this far, I sincerely hope you enjoyed the work. - Mint

#fire emblem #Fire Emblem Three Houses #fe3h #felix hugo fraldarius #annette #post timeskip #romance #fire emblem fanfiction #felianne #felannie

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jcmorrigan · 5 years ago

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I agree with your Sora rant. It's like they were so busy shoving SoKai down our throats (not that I'm against Kairi but it seriously effected her character too) that the Sora we know got lost.

You’re right, but there’s actually more to it than that. You know what? I’m gonna spell out my Sora rant here and give it the proper tags so I can get this opinion out there.

The forced romance is perhaps the most offensive of the missteps, and I love both Sora and Kairi so much that it hurts to see how they got wrecked by it. I’ll touch upon how that affected Sora here, but trust me, its effect on Kairi was horrible in a completely different way. I think we all know how well that went. The thing is, I’m basically a SoRiku or bust type of person, but I’m also a ship-and-let-ship sort. Up until now, the KH series did a good job at building great friendships that had subtext all over, and people were allowed to choose without much argument. Did you want to ship SoKai? SoRiku? RokuShi? RokuNami? NamiShi? TerrAqua? Nothing’s stopping you! I just…don’t believe canon shipping belongs in Kingdom Hearts when it comes to characters who aren’t on the Disney side of the spectrum (obviously I wouldn’t want to remove the Aladdin/Jasmine or Ariel/Eric plots, which are not only important to the films’ integrity but also time-tested successes that mean things to those who grew up with those films).

But let’s talk about Sora first and foremost, and I’m actually going to save the SoKai for last. Because there’s more to talk about here. I went back over cutscene comps from both III and DDD for a little experiment. I’m just going to describe things in text here, but trust me, the images speak for themselves if you want to look them up. I used DDD as my “control” for Sora as it was, before III, the latest Sora in time – the one who had developed most as a character. I have yet to test 1, CoM, or II against III, but they shouldn’t matter as much as DDD, as DDD features a Sora who’s grown through the characterization in all of those games. III should have built on DDD.

Let’s go.

THE THEME OF FRIENDSHIP AND KINDNESS

Sora in DDD is a firm believer in the power of friendship. No, seriously, he mentions it every five minutes to the point where it’s easily parodied. And, in fact, canon does so in an important way. The scene that stands out to me is his arrival in Traverse Town, where he meets Neku Sakuraba and immediately decides they’re friends. Neku scoffs, saying it’s impossible for them to be friends after a short time and telling Sora that he can’t trust every stranger he meets.

Why this stands out to me is because it actually turns out to be a mistake on Neku’s part rather than a pointing out of a legitimate criticism of Sora. And given exactly what this criticism was about – namely, forming positive bonds and devoting yourself to caring about another person, with your best foot forward – I think this was actually a great little arc for Sora and Neku to go through. Neku turns out to be after his own agenda, willing to trick Sora in order to get it, though he regrets he has to do so. Sora forgives him once he knows that Neku just wanted to reunite with Shiki. After all, people do crazy things for their friends, and that’s okay. When Sora collides with Neku, he brings with him a concept Neku is unfamiliar with. Knowing Neku from original TWEWY canon, Neku’s core is about learning to come out of his shell of negativity and see the value in others and the world around him. Sora is hitting him with the extreme of this result – an ideal where every stranger is a friend you haven’t met yet, and kindness always pays off. This seems impossible for Neku, but by the end of that first Traverse Town visit, he learns that Sora was right to bring him this message. Neku is better off now for knowing someone who was willing to put that much trust in him and help him out with a seemingly impossible task, and now he can pass a little piece of that on to someone else.

I think that’s a cool message for us to take into real life. It’s obviously not applicable in the literal sense. Not everyone’s gonna get along, and there are people out there who will have ethical divides we can’t bridge. But for that reason, it’s wonderful to have an escapist fantasy where every new person you meet brings new value to your life, and it’s nice to take just a little bit of that attitude into your life – why not think the best of new people?

This theme continues throughout DDD. Sora declares himself friends with most of the people he meets, and Mickey is even the first to bring this up in Symphony of Sorcery, already feeling that they have a connection that will go places. Beyond that, Sora is always volunteering to assist. When Neku mentions he’s having trouble with the Reaper’s Game, Sora admits he doesn’t have any idea what Neku’s talking about, but he sees a problem and asks if he can help. This is how he approaches pretty much everyone in DDD. He sees people in trouble or people struggling emotionally and he offers a hand or a listening ear.

Contrast his actions in Corona and you’ll find a stark difference. He barely invests in introducing himself to Rapunzel or Eugene, regarding them pleasantly enough but not really inviting them into his circle. It’s in fact Eugene that breaks the ice here, deciding the SDG trio is now his “sidekicks.”

Where this feels offensive is when Sora contests this label on multiple occasions. I might be all right with this if it were a playful competition for who is labeled the brains of the operation, the way that II Sora would declare himself good enough to be king or decide he’s cut out for pirate life. However, it seems more like Sora is legitimately angry that Eugene decided not only to rope Sora into an unknown mission but also set him as the second banana. This couldn’t be more different from the Neku interaction in such a bizarre way. DDD Sora would protest a little at being sidekick, but say he’s happy to help anyway and that he’s glad to have met “Flynn.” (Sidenote: Eugene himself is wonderful during this scene, and Zachary Levi kills the delivery in such a way that you really do know he was hyped to be involved with this franchise. I think that kind of distracted me from seeing these problems at first.)

Eugene goes on to explain that he’s bringing Rapunzel to see the floating lights because she really, really wants it to the point of it being her “dream.” He then says that he can be the guide through the forest if Sora, Donald, and Goofy take care of the Heartless. To this, Donald says that they are heroes, and Goofy backs them up that they’re Heartless experts. Sora offers nothing but a “Leave it to us.”

There’s no mention of helping Rapunzel achieve her dream, or knowing what it’s like to have one. They’re not doing this out of kindness. They’re doing this because “We’re heroes.” Because it’s an obligation. Because it’s the “right thing” to do, and that’s what they always do. There’s no passion behind this commitment at all. Now, for Donald, I buy it. Donald has always been a Jerk With a Heart of Gold. It’s his charm. Goofy? A little more suspect. Goofy is all heart and sympathy with a clumsy exterior, but then again, there’s a lot of room for interpretation with him. Sora, though? Think back to Neku or later Rhyme. Sora should be jumping at the opportunity to help Rapunzel achieve her dream.

Which brings us to the next and larger flaw…

INTERNAL VS. EXTERNAL FOCUS

Sora’s character in DDD is almost fully focused on what’s going on around him. He arrives in Traverse Town to find the TWEWY cast there and suffering their own problems. So he jumps right into the fray to help out. Every move he makes is directed by what he needs to do in order to help them: find Rhyme, chase the black-coated man, trust Neku. He came here in the first place to unlock a Sleeping World, but that seems to Sora to be a secondary agenda to what’s going on with that world’s denizens.

This keeps true with the other worlds he visits. Every time, he has a job: unlock the Keyhole. But he doesn’t gun right for that Keyhole. He instead immerses into what’s going on around him. Quasimodo was frightened away from the Feast of Fools, so let’s deal with that. Mickey is hypnotized in a dream, so let’s get a Sound Idea to defeat the Spellican and wake him up. Why are we after a Spellican, anyway? Because the people in a world we already visited need to beat it in order to complete the Reaper’s Game, which has ZERO to do with our quest. Sora almost never focuses on himself, but instead on the others around him.

This is seen from the very beginning. When he and Riku meet with Yen Sid, Yen Sid points out that they need to earn Mastery. Two important things happen here. First of all, Sora does stick up for himself and claim he’s good enough – very confidently and sincerely. He knows he’s good enough for Mastery and has no question about it. Save this for later. Second, when it becomes clear that Riku has doubts, Sora’s focus shifts immediately. It’s no longer about “Why test me?” but about “My friend thinks he can’t pass, but I know he can, so I need to help both him and our teacher realize that.” And even though he immerses himself in the problems of so many others throughout DDD, not a single world passes without him bringing up how much he couldn’t do this without Riku and he believes in Riku. Sora’s heart encompasses everyone, but if you’re his friend, you get a SPECIAL place and you don’t get lost in the shuffle (and this game is actually what really put me on the SoRiku ship so hard).

Now, let’s look at III. Sora’s quest begins because he has been stripped of his abilities, which is a must-have for any new game starring him so the player can level up in the process. It’s game design. But this has happened to Sora in three other games: CoM, II, and DDD. In all of those, not much focus is given to this device, and he just goes about learning his abilities as they come. However, this time, where it’s never happened before, Sora is suddenly fixated on how “weak” he is without his powers. His quest begins because he seeks to get stronger and achieve the Power of Waking. The story structure is awkward overall regarding the Power of Waking, as every interlude features Yen Sid reminding Sora of its importance and Sora acknowledging it without any real progress being made toward his learning it.

When Sora arrives on Olympus with this in mind, the difference is horribly stark from the way he approaches Traverse Town in DDD. When he reunites with Hercules (which has considerably less sentiment than the similar scene in II), he doesn’t really talk about being gung-ho about saving Thebes from destruction. He kinda just points out that this is Hades’ doing and gets to work. With Neku, he talked sincerely about how he wanted to help. Here, again, it seems out of obligation: I’m a hero. It’s what I do.

Moreover, there’s now so much focus on his lost power. He fixates on it. Asking Hercules about it in the middle of Thebes’ collapse is…not the worst of sins, but a little odd. The rest of this world, however, is scene after scene of Sora reacting to his loss of power rather than the destruction around him and the connections he can forge. A particularly telling scene is when Pete teases him about his lost power, and Sora is hurt. Another is where an original NPC is saved by Sora and taunts him about not being as good as Hercules, and Sora is offended. While this is relatable to the player audience, it doesn’t quite jive with the Sora who proclaimed he didn’t need Mastery because he knew he was good enough and who started three other games at square one without being bothered. This is also the first time since DDD we’ve had a plot where Sora’s conflict revolves around what’s going on inside himself rather than integrating into the environment around him.

It’s not a bad thing to put characters through the paces with self-examination. However, Sora was fully self-actualized as of DDD. The writers actively and consciously set him a step back for III and undid his own development. This is potentially to make him seem more “dynamic” and “three-dimensional” when it really just doesn’t feel like Sora.

This gets incredibly insulting when over the course of that one world alone, Sora learns pretty much every new ability needed for this game except the Power of Waking. So Pete’s insult really only stung for about an hour and then became moot.

Corona also stands out to me because there, Sora doesn’t interact much with Rapunzel upon meeting her. What he does do is hang back with Donald and Goofy and talk about how he knows how she feels, being scared of the world…which he transitions into talking about how Donald and Goofy really helped him during his scary time. Notice what’s missing here? Any engagement of Rapunzel in this conversation and an attempt to bridge their gap by connecting over this shared experience. Sora has taken Rapunzel’s problem and used it to talk about his own instead. Why is this especially odd? Because the factor here being sympathized over is “fear of the outside world” and being confined until you get thrust into a bigger adventure. In DDD, Quasimodo embodied the same concept. Instead of making Quasimodo’s problem about himself, Sora took it upon himself to use his experience to inspire Quasimodo, encouraging him to step outside the cathedral walls and not give up on his dreams.

As for his close friends, you will every now and then get a scene that compares something he sees to a memory of a friend – Elsa and Anna remind him of both Riku and Kairi. But he doesn’t talk about how they affect him at all. And in a game that both follows up on the Riku worship of DDD and is determined to shoehorn a Kairi romance into the ending sequence, both of these characters should be coming to Sora’s lips a lot more. He should be talking about how “You remind me of someone I know – I should introduce you!” or “You know you can count on your canon friend because Riku and Kairi helped me through these hard times.” Even using Donald and Goofy in that role would make more sense, but they seem more tacked on than anything.

SORA’S ENTHUSIASM

Sora in DDD is awed by every new experience. Look no further than the first Traverse Town visit, yet again, where he first sees the new districts and cries out “Never been this way before! Ooh, what’s that?”. This is a town he spent a long time in over the course of KH1, and the prospect of finding a new street in a familiar place is magical to him.

Compare Corona again. When he comes upon Rapunzel’s tower, he does remark, “Wow, a tower!”, but in a very deflated tone compared to his excitement over Traverse Town. And if Quinton Flynn’s delivery is anything to go by, this was the one game in years where the voice actors could finally have free reign without having to struggle to match lip movements. (Seriously, track Quinton’s voice acting performance over the course of the series. It’s a hilarious fluctuation between flawlessness in II and III and utter crashing and burning in every interquel.)

More condemning, however, is his reaction to the kingdom of Corona itself. This comes from a personal place. Corona is one of my favorite Disney environments. I’ve always wished I could visit it because it’s designed so beautifully. When Sora beholds the island from afar, he says…nothing. It’s Rapunzel who remarks how she’s finally close to her dream, and she thanks Sora for getting her here. He still says nothing. This experience suddenly isn’t interesting to him at all.

Sora’s silence is an interesting phenomenon. During DDD, he’s constantly self-narrating. He chats with other characters a lot. He even says some lines that are a little superfluous, indicating where he wants to go next and basically spelling out where the player should turn their attention by talking about what in the area is interesting. But that fits with his enthusiastic character.

In III, he’s quieter. Obviously, giving him party members Donald and Goofy back means he has to divide his dialogue, but there’s a lot of space where they get more to say than he does. (Possibly a disagreement between Disney and Square over whose characters should have more screen time? Please take this theory with a grain of salt.) And then you have scenes like approaching Corona, where he just doesn’t say a word to Rapunzel. Not a “You’re welcome” or an “I’m glad we got you to your dream” or ANYTHING. It’s like he not only doesn’t care about seeing a new place, but doesn’t care about how much it means to his new friend. Which is heartbreaking compared to his previous behavior.

Also, his smiles are less often and less sincere. A nervous smile he gives Frollo when trying not to get in trouble is happier and brighter than a legitimate smile he gives Eugene when promising to guide Rapunzel to Corona, and when Eugene says he “couldn’t have done it without my sidekicks,” Sora doesn’t even smile at him.

One other thing to note – I actually did catch this as a little odd on my first III playthrough, but compounded with this, it now seems very suspect. The Monstropolis transformation is the first time Sora has found one of his own transformations ugly/frightening. In the past, he’s barely minded becoming a merman, a lion, a digital program…and, in the case of Halloween Town, which he visited twice, a literal monster. There’s no reason he should be more frightened of himself in Monstropolis than Halloween Town. Moreover, it implies he finds the monsters of Monstropolis creepier than anyone else he’s met – including the talking lions, the living skeleton, the Beast, the Disney anthros, the animate puppet, the merpeople, and the card soldiers. (You seriously think we’re not keeping track?)

THE FORCED ROMANCE PLOT

Now, however, it’s time to talk about the largest nail in the Sora coffin: the last-minute SoKai plot.

Like I said earlier, I wouldn’t have wanted any shipping plot here whatsoever. But let’s say it absolutely had to get done. Think back to KH1 or even II. In the first game, Kairi manifests as hallucinations for Sora, indicating that he thinks of her often. In II, he has flashbacks to her that are a little more involved and creative than just “Eugene hugging Rapunzel makes me think of Kairi’s face.” His reunion scenes with her in both feature actual conversations. And there’s also plenty of focus on Riku. Sora has two hands and two friends. Even if Kairi must be the love interest, Riku never gets the short end because of it. Sora will still cross the abyss to find him, sending Kairi home safe to the Destiny Islands so he can keep looking for a way to free Riku of his dark prison.

In III, we’re strangely devoid of any reference to either of them besides short flashbacks. And since we’re focusing on Kairi, we’ll talk about her. Sora doesn’t even meet up with her between training sessions. She writes him letters she doesn’t send. They don’t even communicate until endgame triggers. Then, all of a sudden, she initiates the paopu. This is after having no communication for a LONG time, and we have no indication Sora had thought about her on his journey despite a few flashbacks. The paopu is supposed to unite your fates for life, and Sora just rushes right into it.

This is where it should’ve really started to sink in that the SoKai romance was just a series of rushed death flags to get you sad when Kairi finally got slashed. Why they went with the Kairi “death” still escapes me, but if I had to guess, I’d say that ever since Aerith Gainsborough’s death made everyone flabbergasted, Square Enix has been trying to pull the same gambit in order to capture that lightning in a bottle. Take a look at Lunafreya Nox Fleuret for evidence that supports this theory.

Every interaction Sora has with her from that point onward is far too hamfisted. When he tries to shield her from an incoming attack, it’s by hugging her. When in any and all other instances in the past, Sora would at least be savvy enough to leap in front of a person with Keyblade braced. (You can’t count on Goofy to do that for you all the time, bro.) When he flies with her through a void of little importance to get back to the Keyblade Graveyard, he tells her “I feel strong with you” even though they’ve fought together a total of once, and they both literally died in the attempt. Not even together. There is no reason for him to say he feels strong with her; we’ve never seen her make him strong. We’ve seen her appeal to his heart, listen to him, vow to protect him and be strong when he can’t, work to reunite him with Riku, sympathize with his goals, chat and laugh with him. There are so many other themes you could pick here and they went right for the one that makes the least sense but the most automatic association with romance in a “tell-don’t-show” space. Kairi “holding him together” in the Final World is a completely skippable fact for some reason, and also is not anything any mortal should be able to do by KH logic as of yet.

Then, finally, he watches Kairi die, and it breaks him. And it sure broke the audience and got them talking, all right, but not about how great Aerith 3.0 was. (Note: still unconfirmed on that theory.) Sora’s a big old mess of angry tears, all right. And this directly leads to him exiting stage left at the end of the story because he has to find Kairi alone.

So the romance was forced rather than fleshed in order to build up to a shocking scene, relying upon keywords to initiate clichés rather than showing any actual buildup of communication, teamwork, or trust. We can all see how this negatively affected Kairi; essays have already been composed. But how does this turn SORA for the worse?

Well, for one, his sudden laser focus on Kairi makes him unable to really care for anyone else. Riku gets the worst of it. I absolutely hated how, after the first mass murder via Demon Tornado, Sora cried to Riku that “all” of his friends had died and he had no one left. We all know that scene was playing up Kairi. He was crying over Kairi. And in doing so, he happened to imply to Riku that Riku wasn’t valuable enough to be as missed as those lost. Sora lost them “all.” The fact that Riku is there doesn’t mean anything. He has no one left. He has Riku. Riku is no one. Later, when Kairi is lost out there, Sora eschews Riku’s help completely, which is probably to set the stage for whatever installment comes next. However, like the rest of the SoKai scenes, this is rushed, so much so that it sounds like Sora is just disregarding Riku’s counsel entirely and has decided to abandon him in favor of seeking Kairi. Not to mention everyone else in that scene.

Then the fact that Sora gives in to proclaiming it’s love so fast gives me some bad vibes. Kairi hasn’t done much to engage with him on an emotional level as of recently. It almost seems shallow for him to accept the paopu under those circumstances – like he’s a teenage boy chasing a pretty girl rather than a friend acknowledging a friend as more than a friend. And that’s how it looks to me through the rest of the ending sequence. (If you know who my favorite DanganRonpa character is, you can see how I might be used to looking for the signs of this phenomenon.) Think of this in conjunction for how Sora has failed to be other-focused and instead looking to increase his own strength and confidence. Is he ready to give everything up to Kairi? Is he the kind of person who she could count on? He would’ve been in DDD. He also would’ve been the sort of person to balance this out with his friendship with Riku.

The Sora I knew had some growing up to do, but by DDD, he’s self-actualized. He’s confident in his own abilities, even if he has to start from square one. Now his primary motivation is to help others with their problems, especially if those people are his close friends, for whom he is ride or die. Every new experience is magic to him. As of III, Sora now seems insecure, focused on himself, and distant from his friends, including the one he actually does “die” for. The worlds he visits and the friends he makes are means to an end, and hold less magic to him than before, even standing out as negatively bizarre in some cases. III’s Sora does not feel like the same person at all, and this groundwork was laid ingame long before he accepted Kairi’s paopu.

#sora #kingdom hearts critical #kh critical #kingdom hearts iii critical

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oveliagirlhaditright · 5 years ago

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So... I’m a few days late for this, and I apologize. I was busy making birthday presents for the best friend and lost track of time.

And if people can’t use this because it’s late, they of course don’t have to. But...

This is what KH means to me... My thank you to the KH team...

I would have loved to write something for them, but I don’t know if they’d be big on getting fanfiction for their own work. I also could have done a digital manipulation or gmv for them... But IDK. Maybe them getting their own work back to them in a fan-edited way wouldn’t seem good at all? Because you didn’t do most of the work there. They did. You just edited it. And maybe you even edited in a way they wouldn’t approve of, and they see your work as copyright infringement?

So that leaves drawing, but I’m not the best drawer yet...

So screw it. I’m just going to write an essay about what this series has meant to me, the last seventeen years.

(Warning. This will be long. And probably emotional.)

Where do I even begin... I discovered this series when I was nine-years-old, right after the first game had come out. And seeing the advertisements for it on Disney channel made me want to have it so very badly.

I actually didn’t have a PS2 at the time... And while my sister and I did want other games alongside KH, yes, it was mainly for KH that we wanted a Playstation 2... So we begged our parents for one for Christmas, and they were gracious enough to get us one and quite a few games... and, of course, Kingdom Hearts with them.

We actually didn’t start with that one, though (even though I wanted to). My sister wanted to somewhat save the best for last, I guess... And when we did finally end up playing it, I had actually caught a bit of a cold (and it was only the promise that we’d finally play Kingdom Hearts, that day that got me to game. Even though I had been every day before, and had enjoyed all the other games--don’t get me wrong--but I was feeling that crappy, and it took the incentive of Kingdom Hearts to get me to agree).

And to say that I fell in love with it from the get-go would be an understatement. The opening cinematic pulled me in, it’s true (and already, I could tell this was different from the other games based on movies that I’d played), but it was mainly the Dive to the Heart section that really captured me (and made me forget my illness). That atmosphere still gives me chills and wonder, and calls me back to give it a go again years and years later. And I’m glad something like it has been included in games since, like in KHII, KHIII, Re:Coded, and what have you.

I was nine... So I stumbled my way through a lot of this game--and I mean stumbled--I had no idea what I was doing most of the time. In the fights, a lot of the ways I’d let Donald and Goofy do all of the work... and it took me a whole month to find Maleficent in Hollow Bastion. But I did end up beating the game, and understanding all of it.

I also ended up getting deep thoughts about it--as it is a mystery series that leaves you thinking--and I know I used to annoy people by talking about it. Haha. But this series got me thinking in a way that nothing else had... And that I honestly don’t know if most other kids my age could have... at least without something like this in their lives.

At this point, the series owned my soul. It touched me more than any other piece of media ever had, and ever will--and I’d had plenty pieces of media I really liked back then, such as Sailor Moon and yet they didn’t even come close. And while I’d shipped other couples before, such as Usagi and Mamoru from Sailor Moon, Sora and Kairi was the first one where I really felt like “These two have to be together”--and my life became about waiting for the next game (it still very much is, as sad as that might be to say).

I remember I would go to the store, and often times ask people who worked in the game section if they knew anything about a Kingdom Hearts II (this was before I had the Internet), and I recall being really sad one time when one of the workers told me maybe there never would be. LOL And to be clear, this was the time even before Chain of Memories.

Eventually, I saw Chain of Memories advertised on Cartoon Network and then begged my parents for a Game Boy Advance, so I could play this sequel. And for the Christmas that year, they complied as well (gosh, I have the best parents in the world). But I was saddened when I realized I couldn’t really play it with my sister (and her best friend) who I’d played the first game with. So my sister just told me to play it, and then tell her everything that happened. Which I did... With notes, and everything. Oh, yeah. I kept notes on KHI, CoM, and KHII, I think. I was that level of crazy (in a good way!).

Around this time, I was also subscribed to Disney magazines... And when I eventually got one that had Kingdom Hearts II in it: the one that revealed Sora’s new outfit as Beast’s Castle as a world--the first I’d ever heard of it, and the first I realized that Chain of Memories wasn’t the “true sequel” (as much as I did like Chain of Memories, I was glad to hear this. And even moreso that it was coming back to consoles, so I could experience it with my sister and her best friend again), I legitimately screamed so loud, you don’t even know. It’s a good thing I was home alone that day... And screaming about anything Kingdom Hearts related has pretty much become a trend of mine. Oops.

...So then I ended up pre-ordering Kingdom Hearts II from GameStop, with all of the cool things that came with that (like the special edition strategy guide that had four different covers, based on Sora’s Drive Forms. I have the Valor/Brave Form one), and I asked my mom to pick it up for me while I was at school so I could come home the day it came out and immediately start playing it. It came out near the beginning of that year’s spring break, and I beat the whole game in that time... You couldn’t have pulled me away from my Playstation 2 that break if you had tried.

I also know that I tried out for my school’s show choir the time that Kingdom Hearts II had just come out... Something I really should have cared about, but I didn’t as much as I could’ve... And while my mom had gotten busy talking to someone, waiting for me to come back from my audition, when I got back and she was still talking to them... I sort of wanted her to hurry along, so I could get back to my game... Something I think my mom even admitted to that person (but in as nice a way as possible)... Oh my gosh.

I also know that one day, I was thinking about KHII in class--I’d left off on the half-way mark of the game, with the 1000 Heartless battle and all that--so it was heavy on my mind... Our teacher was asking us about our weekends, and someone else in class started talking about how they started playing Kingdom Hearts II, and I gasped loudly--to which everyone stared--and I said that I had the game, too, and loved it... My teacher then said that was the most emotion they’d ever gotten out of me.

Ahahahahaha. I have many other embarrassing stories that I could admit with this series--particularly with KHII, and I have on past accounts--but you know what? I’m going to save myself some humiliation and keep them to myself.

But KH... It means the world to me. How can it not? It’s been a constant joy in my life for so many years: That’s been with me through just a little before my double-digit years, all of my teens, and into my adulthood.

I’ve made many friends through this series, too, either by convincing my friends to give it a try or making friends with people I know love the saga.

It’s a constant light for me, and always has been, that reminds me of my childhood (for so many reasons. The Disney for sure being one of them) and simpler times: And that there always is a light at the end of the tunnel...

In fact, the KH characters even feel like friends I’ve had for a long time--that I can always count on--and who I’m always happy to see.

And even now, that feeling hasn’t faded away (it probably never will). Since the way I reacted to KHIII, is pretty much the way I did KHII: Even fourteen years later, and as an adult now.

Kingdom Hearts even introduced me to all the things I love. I found YouTube--after I finally got Internet--when a friend told me I could watch the Kingdom Hearts II secret ending there, as I hadn’t unlocked it myself (and since I had doubts in myself as a gamer back then, I wasn’t sure that I could. Even though I had unlocked the one for the first game. And did eventually do so for the second game... and all of them, except for KHIIFM so far). And YouTube, amvs (a lot of them for KH) is how I found my love for video editing.

And moreover, I’m a writer. And it was in Googling stuff about Sora and Kairi that I eventually discovered fanfiction (that I actually, stupidly, thought was official stuff by the actual writers at first, because I found fanfiction on sites that weren’t called that), and through that started it myself and honed my writing skills. My writing style is probably even inspired by KH, in a lot of ways--like how I handle mystery and when I deliver information to the reader, and all.

KH also did simpler things, like getting me into other Square Enix games (Final Fantasy, The World Ends With You, Bravely Default), and gaming in general.

I wouldn’t be the person I am today without Kingdom Hearts, and that’s just the facts.

I’ve even bonded over it with my dad. My dad doesn’t know the series at all, God bless him, but he’s always willing to talk to me about it and ask me questions since he knows I love it so much. He always asks me when the next game’s coming out. Or if he knows one’s coming out, he’s aware of how happy that must have made me... Or if I’m playing it around him, and he hears a long song begin to play, he knows I must have beaten it. He also went to the Kingdom Hearts Orchestra with me:D

My mom also knows the series through me. A bit more than my dad, since she used to come up and watch us play it some (my dad also did a few times). But I felt it’s more fitting to mention my dad here, since he actually knows it less... And still admirably does this stuff, and is still this in the know about how much it means to me.

...I’ve admitted this before (like in an official survey to Square Enix)--even though I don’t like to, for obvious and personal reasons (and this is for sure something my parents don’t know and never should)--that in really rare, dark times of mine... Kingdom Hearts has saved me from suicide: Those times that I struggle with depression, and felt like I really had nothing else to live for... And yet wanting to be alive to finally see the end of Sora's story, drove me to give life another chance.

And I don’t really think I can say much more than that, or go deeper, to express just what this franchise is to me.

So Kingdom Hearts team... from the bottom of my heart, thank you for everything.

#thank you kh team

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cookiecuttercritter · 6 years ago

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The Curious Case of John Smith - How to Save the World in 12 Easy Steps, S1E6

There have been John Smith episodes, but this one’s THE John Smith episode.

Genre: Fantasy/Sci-Fi Kitchen Sink, Slice of Life

Wordcount: ~2400.

Because the continuity gags, pilot characters, and little bits of world building are really starting to compound: WIP Intro, Pilot, E1, E2, E3, E4, E5

INT. CLASSROOM - DAY

JOHN SMITH sits at his desk, brows furrowed. He scribbles notes on the indistinct lecture.

His phone's on the desk. He scrolls through grades and past assignments. In the corner of his notepad, he constructs a table: MEDIAN | WHAT I GOT

A 96 under both headings. 71. 56. 84. It dawns on him: he's hit the median every single time. His leg bounces restlessly, he grimaces, buries his face in the crook of his arm, sinks down into the desk, shuts his eyes. It all becomes too much -

The light directly above him EXPLODES!

He's showered with glass, stumbles out of his seat, trips, lands on all fours, staggers for the door. EVERYONE stares.

MR. PISCOLI turns, sniffling into his pine-bristle frost mustache, chalk still suspended at board-writing height. He's a monocled history teacher who looks like he very well could've lived through everything he teaches. Left on the board behind him: "WE CONCLUDE HIS ALIAS WAS 'MOON MOON'"

John Smith makes it out to the hall, collapses, scrabbles to his feet, gasps. His hat slips off and he abandons it.

Heads swivel in flawless synchrony to the seat by the window, three rows back. JAIDYN snoozes at the Protagonist Seat, cheek propped up in his palm. His head slips, face SLAMS against the desk. He snaps awake, blinks, rubs his nose, casts an accusatory glance around the room.

JAIDYN What?

Everyone tips their head toward the door. Outside, John Smith stumbles down the hall. Lights FLICKER above him. All swivel back in vacant anticipation.

Jaidyn groans. He stands, everyone sucks in air through their teeth. Jaidyn sighs and sits back down.

JAIDYN Can I -

The class collectively sucks in air through their teeth.

JAIDYN - May I. Go to the bathroom -

Mr. Piscoli flourishes a yellow neckerchief with HALL PASS sharpie'd on it.

JAIDYN - Have a bathroom pass.

MR. PISCOLI Yes you may.

INT. HALLWAY - DAY

John Smith enters the frame, hand to the wall, hand to his chest. He's trembling, struggling to breathe, fighting to stay on his feet. He screws his eyes shut -

Lights EXPLODE.

He looks, his EYES ARE BOLT-WHITE. He lurches out of frame.

Moments later, another door BURSTS open and MARLEY sprints out, dragging TETRA in tow.

TETRA We can't just leave in the middle of class, we don't have -

MARLEY Hall passes are for the feeble-minded! We think for ourselves! You saw that John Smith guy, didn't you? He's not who he says he is -

Tetra sighs as she's lugged past rows upon rows of lockers.

TETRA (under her breath) No duh. (normally) Why are you really doing this?

MARLEY You're catching on quick, grasshopper.

TETRA That doesn't answer my question.

MARLEY If he's destructive, I can use him.

TETRA Is that all?

Marley forges on, unfazed. Tetra casts her gaze downward.

They approach an open door leading to a dark underground. Marley pivots Tetra to stand in front of her.

MARLEY You see well in the dark, right?

Tetra nods uneasily. Marley gives her a little push and she tiptoes toward the inky, definitely-have-killed-a-few-people steps. Her pupils dilate, adjusting to the dark.

A BOLT TEARS THROUGH THE DARK, ZAPPING HER SHOULDER! Tetra falls back, hissing and gripping her blistered arm.

Marley clicks her tongue, hand held thoughtfully to her chin. She skirts around Tetra and flips a light switch in the stairwell. Sterile fluorescents illuminate the stairs.

Marley starts, turns, suddenly remembering she's not alone.

MARLEY Are you alright?

TETRA I'm fine.

Marley nods, makes for the staircase, squeezes up against the wall as she descends.

Another bolt WHIPS out of the depths and ELECTROCUTES Tetra IN THE FACE! She collapses, twitching and crying weakly.

Marley acknowledges this tragedy for but a second, turns, descends.

INT. BOILER ROOM - DAY

Marley's footfalls echo off the walls.

In the distance, a dim light sputters. It’s distinctly alive. It moves, grows in size, it’s coming straight for her -

Marley flicks on a light.

It’s only Jaidyn gripping tight to a faintly glowing stalk of bamboo. A yellow neckerchief sticks out of his pocket. At first, he’s all bewilderment and apprehension. And then, recognition. Then a muffled smirk.

Marley surveys him as if he were something stuck to the bottom of her spotless Mary Janes.

JAIDYN Have we met?

MARLEY Oh, shut up.

LIGHTS RATTLE and FLICKER. SPARKS run along the pipes. Jaidyn raises Hoover a little higher, Marley reaches for her watch.

The electrical spasm dies down and John Smith groans from somewhere further down in the dark.

MARLEY Let’s get formalities out of the way.

She throws her backpack down and whips out a thick glove. She slips it on and extends her hand.

MARLEY Marley Benson.

Jaidyn’s eyes dart from Marley’s face to her outstretched hand and back. He subtly turns away, refusing her offer.

JAIDYN Jaidyn.

Another CRASH, roar, rattle. Marley raises her brows.

MARLEY Well, what are you standing around for?

INT. BASEMENT - DAY

Marley and Jaidyn take slow and measured steps toward John Smith, who's collapsed on the floor, hacking for breath, eyes flashing between blinding white and stale brown. There's a palpable thrum in the air, a heartstring's strained and bound to snap. He throws a hand up but can't bring himself to meet their eyes.

JOHN SMITH Stay back!

He passes out, faceplanting in the dust-carpeted concrete.

THE LIGHTS GO WILD, crackling, sparking, bursting -

Jaidyn hops back, wincing.

Then all at once, it ceases. Darkness. Silence.

Then -

Lights are back. Marley's stood by the fuse box, having plunged a sparking lever back to restore electricity. The only thing keeping her from being electrocuted is that inordinately thick electrician's glove.

Lightning BLASTS from the ceiling, hitting John Smith in the back. He bolts upright. His eyes are frozen-lightning white.

Marley tosses her glove to the ground, casually flips her hair, storms up to him -

JAIDYN You're not seriously going to kick him while he's down, are you?

Marley shoots him a 'Who exactly do you think I am?' look and pointedly kicks John Smith in the side of the head without breaking eye contact with Jaidyn, who hastily looks away. She presses her heel to John Smith's chest.

MARLEY I never believed you were human for a second. I was right to pressure you...

TETRA (O.S.) Wait!

Tetra rushes in, TACKLES Marley. Both girls eat dust. Tetra HOISTS Marley into the air. She's much stronger than her tiny frame betrays.

TETRA What's he ever done to you?!

She HURLS Marley, who BOWLS into Jaidyn, who in turn makes no attempt to move out of the way, having already accepted his fate. Marley winds up on top of Jaidyn but not a moment is wasted on blushing and sentimentality. She springs back to her feet, fists balled.

Tetra moves to put a hand on John Smith's shoulder -

JOHN SMITH Don't touch me! Please. I don't want to hurt anyone.

She retracts her hand, kneels to his level, never once taking her violet-drenched eyes off him -- a chaos-feeder in action.

TETRA It's okay. Everything's gonna be okay.

JOHN SMITH I don't - we -

He clamps his hands over his mouth, trembles, convulses of the electricity skating over his skin.

MARLEY I'm sorry, did he just say 'we' -

TETRA Marlene! I got this! (back to John Smith) I'm sorry, did you just say 'we' and shut your mouth right after?

He nods though he's unsure. He's tearing up.

TETRA Can you tell me a little more about that? It's okay, it's just us. And Marley and Jaidyn. But just pretend they're not here.

Marley scoffs, crosses her arms, turns away. Jaidyn tosses Hoover to the ground. He clangs hollowly off the concrete.

Tetra takes John Smith's hand. He cringes but doesn't shock her.

TETRA See? It's okay.

He takes a deep, ragged breath.

JOHN SMITH My name... isn't John Smith.

MARLEY (under her breath) No duh.

TETRA MARLENE!

Marley throws her hands up in surrender, starts pacing. Jaidyn plops down, cheek in hand, eager to nap.

TETRA (back to John Smith) Please continue.

JOHN SMITH It's Keh - K-Kay - Ep -Ked -

He screams and grips his head in agony. Lights RATTLE and FLICKER. He can only speak through gritted teeth.

JOHN SMITH - Shut it! That's our name -- that isn't it -- What?! Let us say -- that's our original - it's not that -- been so long -- you all are - yeah, well, we're not the ones screaming -

Tetra grips his hand harder.

TETRA Khep, was it?

JOHN SMITH (quieting down) Yeah, that's. Really close, actually.

TETRA I'm glad it is.

From now on, John Smith will be referred to as Khep. They sit together until the protesting, knocking lights die down to just a static electric hum.

When he finally opens his mouth, it's like he's disintegrating just to speak:

KHEP We're not from here...

FLASHBACK START:

EXT. CLOUD FOREST - NIGHT

A young HIKER wanders through a fog-suffused forest, his hiking stick stabbing the ground at regular intervals. CRACK -- a twig's snapped. He turns, looks -

ZAP! A bolt of LIGHTNING strikes him on the head, killing him instantly.

Dark clouds swirl and rumble. Lightning jitters across the vast expanse of the grey-cast sky.

KHEP (V.O.) We don't know where we came from or what we really are.

The clouds animate, gliding through the air with living mass.

KHEP (V.O.) But we know we were the reason those who entered the woods never returned. We collected lives. Memories mostly. We made new friends. And then...

A SLASH materializes in the very fabric of the sky. Space warps, thunder claps, people point and scream. Through the portal, ANOTHER EARTH can be seen. It's speeding up, drifting closer, it's going to hit -

KHEP (V.O.) We did the only thing we could think of -

EXT. CITY PLAZA - NIGHT

It's crowded. People murmur, point at the growing hole in the sky. Suddenly -

SOMEONE COLLAPSES. The corpse smokes.

LIGHTNING.

More people collapse. Khep works through the whole crowd.

EXT. SPACE

The two planets collide. At the point of contact between dimensions, a wispy cloud leeches from one world to another, carrying a spark with it.

FLASHBACK END.

Tetra holds a sullen Khep gently, pity in her quartz-marble eyes. In the back, Jaidyn's sealed his gaze to the floor, not quite awake and yet somehow ashamed.

KHEP A while later we figured out how to spare and even inhabit hosts. We've been growing in numbers ever since.

TETRA How many people am I talking to?

KHEP (sighing) ... 11 million. And some aren't even human.

TETRA How is that possible?

They smile gently.

KHEP Memories are just electrical information.

Marley grunts in exasperation, points an accusatory finger.

MARLEY First of all, that's not how that works, at all -

KHEP We're several ten thousand lifetimes, cumulative. If you really want to talk what does and doesn't work, we could be here a while -

MARLEY - Second of all! All that knowledge and you choose to go back to school?! You fry your own brain or something -

Khep screeches and two lights SHATTER!

KHEP We did all the traveling and teaching and learning already! We just missed being normal! We knew we could pull it off, crunch the numbers and act perfectly average, pick the most common first and last names -

TETRA So what went wrong?

KHEP Nothing! It's just... everyone wants to be special, but average can't be special! We're all screaming in here but we can't afford to lose this host.

TETRA But Khep, no one's forcing you to be average! You are all so special and you need to know that!

KHEP Really?

TETRA Yes! You're amazing and you should be proud of who you are!

She offhandedly brushes shards of glass from her hair.

KHEP You really think so?

Tetra nods vigorously. Khep shuts their eyes for a moment. When they open them, they're vanilla-brown, back to normal. Tetra pats their hand. Khep smiles weakly.

Tetra turns to Jaidyn and Marley.

TETRA We're the only ones who know.

She sticks her hand out.

TETRA Hands in. All together now. This stays between us.

KHEP No.

All turn to them.

KHEP I - we, we wanna show the world who we really are. It's about time.

Their eyes glow, fill with light, turning completely white.

INT. HALLWAY - DAY

Khep struts down the hall, dignified, elegant, awash with sunlight streaming in from an open window. Their eyes glow, they crackle with electricity.

STUDENTS turn and stare. Marley, Jaidyn, and Tetra watch them go.

SOME EXTRA Is that John Smith?

MARLEY They clean up nicely, don't they?

JAIDYN They're wearing the exact same -

TETRA I'm proud of them. They're happy in their fragile, perishable host, and that's what matters.

Jaidyn ties his hall pass around Tetra's singed arm. She smiles and nods appreciatively.

CARTER KENETT watches Khep go and WHIPS his thick plastic-rimmed glasses off his face to wipe the lenses on his shirt, as if that'd help him see better. He's a beryl-eyed platinum blonde jock who blithely carries himself with just a tad too much self-importance and the confidence of say, a superhero.

SOME OTHER EXTRA Am I crazy or did I just see Attesservate here?

Carter starts and shoves his glasses back on.

CARTER No way! You must have just imagined it.

Jaidyn hands Khep their mesh cap and they put it on backwards with a self-assured smile as if nothing had changed at all. They blink, eyes returning to familiar brown.

KHEP That went so much better than we imagined. But we think we prefer to be inconspicuous. We were just starting to get used to it.

Tetra throws her arms around Marley and Khep, pulling them close to each side of her. She grins between the both of them. Khep catches on and yanks Jaidyn toward the slowly-yet-surely forming human wall. Jaidyn sighs and leans into Khep, having already accepted his fate.

Thanks for reading this slightly longer-than-usual episode!!!

This episode’s shoutout goes to @esoteric-eclectic-eccentric for ‘Moon Moon’.

HTSTW tag list (ask to be added/removed!): @maxbeewriting @eyelessfatdragon @glacizata @maple-writes@theforgottencoolkid @delerious-wordsmith @leskinggoddesskittycat@klywrites @aslanwrites @chaosandtrickery @deepestbelieverstranger @izzuniiwrites @managingmymuse @livingthelovelylife @piratequeenofpixies @jynecca @wordofthedey @loopyhoopydrabbles @beatlesandbards @mysterysiria @penicilliums

Next time on How to Save the World, dining hall food and puppies!

#s1e6 #wip #htstw #cookie's writing #cookie's stuff #script #screenplay #screenwriting #amwriting #fantasy kitchen sink #slice of life #comedy #writers on tumblr #tetra #john smith #khep #sorry i took so long with this one #and that its so long

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sseanight · 5 years ago

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Park Jimin Fics Recommendation

Recent update 200125

[ ❥ ] = Favorite

Kim Namjoon — Kim Seokjin — Min Yoongi — Jung Hoseok — Kim Taehyung — Jeon Jungkook

[ ❥ ] Our Little Family; parent!au, fluff, angst

You were just a pre-school teacher, a simple dream that came true as you always adored children. But what you didn’t know, was how one child and her very special father would change you dream forever.

♠ The Unfaithful Wife; angst

He never believes you. Never.

♠ Will You; angst

part 1 | part 2 finale

Park Jimin, your boyfriend, was nothing but the cutest boyfriend on earth. No one could ever compare to him. He was your prince charming, your favorite superman and your Mickey Mouse. That was until he started to show his other side. The not so good side. A very jealous side, which from the start was kind of adorable but it soon became a big problem in your relationship.

♠ Because of Love; angst

One day, Jimin picks up his wife at the office.

♠ Dress Code; ceo! au, smut

Jimin takes it upon himself to discipline you when your attire doesn’t exactly adhere to HR regulations.

♠ Mistake; angst

part 1 | part 2 finale

One stupid mistake can change everything.

♠ Hidden Tears; angst

part 1 | part 2 finale

A smile can hide millions of tears.

♠ Power Play; porn star!au, smut

You know him as the A lister of all porn stars; a man who sits pretty in his place at the top of the food chain. But you also know him as the Park Jimin who single handedly humiliated you and ruined your own career as a rookie just starting out, the epitome of the biggest dick in the entire industry… and you’re not talking about his assets. But when Park Jimin comes to you, saying he’s in a slump that only you can get him out of and begs you to sign an exclusive contract with him; things get messy… in more ways than one.

♠ Tease; idol!au, smut

You miss your boyfriend Jimin very much, especially when he’s on tour, so you decide to tease him slightly. However, you learn very quickly that Park Jimin does not like to be teased.

♠ Ribbons (ft. Jeon Jungkook); smut

Your boyfriend, jimin, arranges the best birthday present you could have ever asked for.

[ ❥ ] Blue Blood; royalty!au, smut, angst

Prince Jimin was born with blue blood. His coronation is rapidly approaching, but there are two requirements he must fulfil before becoming a king. He must have the skills to fight in battle, and he must have a Queen with blood as blue as his. You, a member of the royal guard, are assigned to teach Jimin the ins and outs of combat. You are not scared of death, of blood, or of battle. What you are scared of however, is falling in love with Jimin, the one man your blood decrees you can never have.

♠ Just Sayin / I Tired; angst, fluff, smut

Sometimes love isn’t enough.

♠ Body Party; smut, fluff

It’s your birthday and Jimin decides to throw you a private party.

♠ Sin City; smut

After a run of bad luck, you can go back home and admit defeat or step out of your comfort zone and look for a job at Sin City.

♠ Sated (ft. BTS); heavy smut

Sin. There’s nothing more.

♠ Beholden; royal!au, smut

As the rightful Queen to your nation, you have always known you one day must marry. Each time the question has arisen in the past, you have found legitimate reasons to turn the men down. Until now, that is. Until the proposal of a distant King, one whose union would only bring benefit to your people. Except for the fact, that your heart has already been taken by his proposer.

♠ No Strings; fwb!au, smut, slightly angst

It started off as such a simple question. How to know if you’re bad in bed? Of course when you asked, you didn’t imagine Jimin would actually answer.

♠ Stress Relief; smut

Jimin keeps working late. He decides to wake you up in a way you can’t refuse.

♠ Like I Would (ft. Jung Hoseok); angst, smut, slightly fluff

Sometimes, a shoulder to cry on can be the most dangerous thing of all.

♠ Tease; smut

part 1 | part 2 finale

Your best friend gets a new job, but tries to keep it a secret from you. You manage to find the address to his work, but why did it lead you to a strip club?

♠ The Rules of Heaven; angel!au, angst

Jimin is in love and Heaven doesn’t allow for it.

♠ Hurting Hearts; angst

“It’s not what it looks like”. But guess what? It is what it looks like.

♠ You; angst, fluff

You are his gf but totally not his ideal type, then Jimin’s childhood friend is perfect.

♠ Excuses; angst, fluff

part 1 | part 2 finale

Busy. You hated that word.

[ ❥ ] Partiality; parent!au, angst. fluff

You and Jimin argue about your kids not loving you two equally.

[ ❥ ] Charity; prince!au, angst, fluff, smut

You’re a maid for the Crowned Prince of Busan, you’re in love with him, but you think he only uses you for charity, so one night at the new karaoke bar, you try your best to forget him, with the help of a stranger.

♠ Part of Your World; merman!au, angst, fluff

Jimin has always longed for the wide-open skies of the Above Sea. After saving the life of a beautiful human woman, he seeks to find her and finally live in his dream world. But young mermen should be careful what they wish for.

♠ Runaway Love; fluff, angst

Hoseok is panicking because his two best friends are getting married and he kind of lost the groom.

♠ Misunderstanding; angst, fluff

It was a mistake. A total misunderstanding.

♠ Promise; angst, fluff

In which Jimin attempted to fix all the mess he had done.

♠ Mermaid Melodies; mermaid!au, fluff

After you meet Park Jimin, you start to think that humans are not that bad as the Tribe said.

[ ❥ ] Faded Love; married couple!au, angst

He doesn’t need to say it. because you can feel your husband, park jimin, falling out of love with you.

♠ Trying Something New; smut, romance

Your boyfriend accidentally stumbles upon your porn stash and decides to make your fantasies reality.

♠ Cutie; angst, fluff

He has been out late at night, and you didn’t know why…until someone had texted him.

♠ Spring Day; idol!au, angst, fluff

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5

You knew that married life with an idol would be challenging. You just didn’t know that it would be this challenging.

♠ Betray (ft. Kim Taehyung); angst

In which taehyung leaves you on the day of your wedding to run off with your best friend and you finding out about their secret.

[ ❥ ] About Time (ft. Jeon Jungkook); time travel!au, angst

Be careful for what you wish for, because you may never know how to deal with them once it comes true. What would you do when your wish for a second chance actually came true? But was it really a fulfilled wish? Too many questions lie when it actually happened. Were they real memories? Or perhaps a part of a past life? Was it only a dream all along? Will everything be different this time?

♠ 2 PM; fluff

Long-distance relationship are hard.

♠ One Year; smut

In which jimin really just wants to enjoy dinner but his jealousy gets the better of him.

♠ Heartbreak Insurance; fluff

The average person falls in love 4 to 7 times before marriages and 40% to 50% of all marriages end in divorce. 85% of all relationship end with a breakup. Don’t just be a statistics! At Heartbreak Insurance, we are committed to be there when you need it most. Affordable and comprehensible solutions to meet your needs today! With our Heartbreak Insurance, you can find a plan that fits your needs. We cover and care for you in most vulnerable times, offering paid times off, therapy sessions, and care packages. Because heartbreak is pain too.

♠ One Time Thing; bestfriend’s-boyfriend!au. fluff, angst, smut

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4

What are you going to do when your best friend asks you to have a sex with her boyfriend?

♠ Instincts; hybrid!au, fluff, smut

Who wants a snow leopard as a pet? No one, and you don’t want to be a pet, but the day before you’re supposed to be euthanized you’ll take what you can get; a nice enough man, but something about him seems off.

[ ❥ ] Strip; stripper!au, fluff, angst, smut

Everything you have done has always been about surviving life and raising your child on your own. Having someone else caring about you was the last thing you had expected. Especially when that someone is the same man you have watched performing every night on stage and secretly admired. But will he run the moment he finds out about your little secret waiting at home?

♠ Sweeter Than Sweet; vampire!au, smut, angst, fluff

You never would have expected someone like Park Jimin to notice you. As handsome and beguiling as he is deadly, you’re enthralled from the very moment you meet. Addicted to his kiss and his bite, Jimin opens up your eyes to a whole new world of love, lust and seduction.

♠ Confession; angst

When your idol boyfriend Park Jimin video calls you one night, the confession he tells you turns your world upside down.

[ ❥ ] Touched by a Fallen Star; prince!au, fantasy, angst, smut

You know he doesn’t belong to you. It’s pure science, physics. The stars have always belonged to the night sky, but since when has the night sky belonged to one of its insignificant stars?

♠ Thank You, Next; best friends to lovers!au, fluff, slight angst, smut

In high school you weren’t very popular, ten years later you travel to a class reunion of your old class. What could go wrong?

♠ Vlive Blowjob; smut

You and Jimin make a bet: If he loses, he has to buy a purse of the new Gucci collection for you, but if you lose, you have to make him a blowjob… while he makes a Live. None of this makes sense, but he was drunk when he proposed and you were drunk when you accepted. That explains everything.

#bts #bts jimin #jimin #park jimin #bts x reader #bts smut #bts fluff #smut #bts angst

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preserving-ferretbrain · 6 years ago

Text

Nildungsroman

by Dan H

Saturday, 27 September 2008

Dan finally identifies something that has been bugging him.~

I've always had a problem with Modern Fantasy. Not in the sense of "published within the last five years" (although there is also that) but in the sense of "set in the real world, only with magic and shit, which most people don't know about". Possibly that's Urban Fantasy.

This whole thing struck me while I was reading Cassandra Cla(i)re's City of Bones, which funnily enough seems to have a lot of traits in common with a certain other modern fantasy series that the author may or may not have heard of, and which I may or may not have said a few things about in the past, so these comments are slightly biased towards those two august tales, but I'll also be talking about other elements of the Geek Canon, including Buffy, Tolkein and Star Wars.

As ever, contains spoilers.

The Hero's Journey: Ur Doin It Rong

For what it's worth, I'm not actually a big fan of Joseph Campbell. I think the observation that lots of different myths have lots of things in common rates somewhere between "dog bites man" and "Bishop of Rome Espouses Nicene Creed" on the duh-o-meter. On the other hand, the Hero With A Thousand Faces One Of Which Is Luke Skywalker does nicely identify a basic structure which can, at the very least, make sure that a mythically-slanted story doesn't suck donkey balls.

Very broadly, the Hero's Journey has three stages: the departure, the initiation, and the return. The hero starts out as Joe Ordinary (or possibly as Joe Destiny), then goes off into the Crazy World of Magic Shit, then comes back a better and more complete man. Along the way he has to get eaten by a whale and meet a goddess, but that's basically the deal (any inaccuracies can be attributed to my not actually having read The Hero With A Thousand Faces and thus getting most of my information from Wikipedia).

Star Wars, as you probably already know, was based very, very, very (very, very, very) closely on the classic Campbellian journey (right down to including the trash compactor scene pretty much entirely to tick the "hero goes underground and bad shit happens" box). Early season Buffy actually holds fairly closely to the model as well, both in terms of its overall arc (at least in seasons 1-5) and the structure of individual episodes. An episode of Buffy usually opens with our heroine facing a Typical Teenage Problem, then getting drawn into a supernatural event which allowed her, at the end, to resolve her Real Life problem as well as lay the smackdown on some vampires. As I've argued before on Ferretbrain, I think Buffy lost its way around the point it stopped bringing everything back to the real world.

And that, in a roundabout way, is what I think is wrong with Modern Fantasy. If you blinked you might have missed it, so I'll say it again more explicitly. A lot of Modern Fantasy seems to be at least loosely based on the Hero's Journey, and while it does the departure and the initiation really well, it seems to write the whole "return" bit off as a waste of time. Modern heroes leave their home and family, descend into the underworld, and bloody well stay there.

Now I admit, part of this is going to be structure. In a TV series about fighting vampires (for example), you'll always get to the point where you can't view "going out to fight some vampires" as anything but routine, and you can only escalate so far before you have to play the "real life is the greatest battle" card or the "fighting the very essence evil itself" card (neither of which worked). On the other hand, part of it seems to be an issue with people actually missing the point of the Hero's Journey. I'm going to talk about both these phenomena, because I like to hear myself talk.

Sunnydalization: Myth Invades Reality

If, like me, you wasted your entire undergraduacy watching Buffy videos, and can quote pretty much the entire seven series end to end, including the "grr-arg" bits with the mutant enemy logo, you'll probably remember the bit in Prophecy Girl where Willow finds two dead bodies in the student lounge in Sunnydale High and, despite having seen at least a corpse a week for the past series, gets totally freaked out. When challenged about it, she says:

"I'm not okay. I knew those guys. I go to that room every day. And when I walked in there, it... it wasn't our world anymore. They made it theirs.

And at that point, Buffy changed subtly but irrevocably. Prior to that scene, Sunnydale was the real world, and the Hellmouth was the place where the monsters were. Every week, Buffy would battle the legions of hell, and every week she would come out and go to class and we would see exactly what she was fighting to protect. We'd see Jonathan and Cordelia and Harmony and the rest, all going on with their totally normal lives, totally unaware that little Miss Summers had been saving their collective assi.

After that moment, though, it all changed. Things got bigger and scarier, and the Demons didn't go back into their box. Buffy may have defeated the Master at the end of Season 1, but she failed to defeat the Hellmouth, and as the seasons progressed the line between the "reality" of Sunnydale and the Underworld of the Hellmouth became more and more blurred. In season three we are told that the mayor "built this town for demons to feed on" and by the end of season seven the two are so inextricably linked that the final closing of the Hellmouth actually destroys the town.

As I said above, I ultimately think this is an inevitable effect in a long running series. The first time a vampire attacks somebody on school grounds it's scary. The twelfth you just start to wonder why the school is still open. The Sunnydale body count became something of a running joke ("if we train hard, keep focus, and don't have so many mysterious deaths, Sunnydale is gonna rule") but while it was funny it also began to undermine the point of the show. What started out as a nice little town threatened by a supernatural enemy became itself a seat of magical corruption. By the end of series seven there is literally nobody normal left in Sunnydale, they've all evacuated because of the effects of the Hellmouth (even the more sympathetic demons get out of town).

What this means is that, by the end of the series, Buffy has literally nothing left worth fighting for, except possibly Joss Whedon's ropey feminist doctrine. The later series of Buffy fall flat because, as Sunnydale itself becomes a place of evil, the Slayer loses all contact with the real world.

Mugglism: The Family Romance

Ultimately, though, I can forgive Buffy for its structural flaws. What I have more trouble with is the peculiar tendency in a lot of Modern/Urban Fantasy to treat the Fantasy World as just flat-out better than reality.

The chronic offender in this case is, of course, the Wizarding World of the Harry Potter series. Harry is rescued from the dull, dreary (and psychotically abusive) Dursleys, the "biggest load of Muggles" Hagrid has ever seen. He is then taken away into the wonderful Wizarding world where everything is fabulous and magical. He then discovers that he is a figure of the utmost importance in said world, and people either treat him with awe or loathing, both of which he finds equally affirming, while the infallibly wise guardian of his new world assures him that he really is all that and a bag of chips. Meanwhile the author informs us in interviews that everything in the Wizarding world is indeed superior to everything in the real world.

Oh, and just to forestall the inevitable "but the Wizarding world is really dangerous" apologia, there are two things to say about that. Firstly, until Rowling writes a scene that actually reminds me of the Holocaust, instead of just vaguely alluding to people making Nazi salutes, real life has Rowling licked when it comes to being dark, man. Secondly, horrors of actual, non-school-based wars aside, "like the real world but nastier" is yet another way of saying "like the real world but better". I'm going to hark right back to my third ever Ferretbrain article here and say that one of the things that really impressed me about Pan's Labyrinth was the fact that the really scary thing in it was not the Faun, or the Labyrinth, or the dude with the eyes in his hands, but the brutal mass-murdering fascist.

Anyway, where was I. Oh yes. The "fantasy is better than reality" style of Urban Fantasy usually winds up being a version of the (Freudian, and therefore almost certainly no longer reputable) idea of the Family Romance. The belief, common in young children, that their parents aren't their real parents, and they're actually something different and special. Of course most of us then grow up and realise that our parents are pretty okay people, and that being a Magical Princess probably wouldn't be that great, and actually there's some pretty radical stuff in the real world which we could be getting on with (like writing for webzines or playing World of Warcraft).

A mythical journey in which the Hero leaves the real world and then never comes back is always going to seem, to me (and therefore to anybody who matters), to be fundamentally juvenile.

Pan's Labyrinth would have been completely meaningless if Ofelia did not ultimately end up confronting Vidal (albeit hopelessly), and the Lord of the Rings loses a lot of its impact if the Hobbits don't go back to the shire. Harry Potter may save the Wizarding World, but muggles like me have no reason to care about that. Stories like the Potter series work absolutely fine, as long as you're still labouring under the illusions that you're a beautiful unique snowflake, and the only people that matter are you and the few others you're willing to accept as equally special. The moment you - not to put too fine a point on it - grow the fuck up, and realise that everybody else (yes even the teachers at your school, yes even your parents, yes even the kids who are mean to you) are real people with their own lives and ideals, you have to let go of the belief that your secret world is the most important one.

I've not yet finished City of Bones, much less the whole "Mortal Instruments" series, but it's shaping up to go the same way as potter: a long story about somebody totally failing to grow up.

In Conclusion: Why Americans Damned Well Should Be Afraid of Dragons

Roleplayers in the audience will probably know that White Wolf Game Studio used to publish, as part of their risibly-entitled World of Darkness line a game called Changeling the Dreaming. It was a game about, like, the loss of innocence and the death of dreams, man. Players took on the role of Changelings, fairy spirits in human bodies, who were slowly losing their beautiful-unique-snowflakeness under the crushing "Banality" of the modern world.

As games went, it was alright, it fetishised childhood in a slightly iffy way, but otherwise was decent Guns and Wizards Urban Fantasy fare. What bugged me about it, though, was the way it essentially divided everything in the world into "Banal" (soul destroying and imagination crushing) and "Glamorous" (drawing on the power of the Dreaming, the wellspring of human imagination). In particular, what bugged me about it was that it assumed that "imagination" was associated purely with the trappings of medieval fantasy. An artist who paints grim cityscapes and urban decay is Banal, an artist who paints forests full of dancing elves is Glamorous.

Who Wants to be a Millionaire is Banal wish-fulfillment tapping into people's desire to get something for nothing. The hundred or so fairy stories about farmer's sons who get fantastically rich because of a stroke of good fortune are totally inspiring and bring out the best in humanity.

In her article Why are Americans Afraid of Dragons? Ursula le Guin observes (perhaps correctly) that the Fantasy genre is looked down upon in America, and that this is perhaps indicative of a society too obsessed with industry, productivity and profit, and distrustful of the imagination. Fiction in general, and fantasy in particular, encourages the reader to stop thinking about how they can best make a million bucks before they're forty and start thinking about any one of the million other things they could be doing. As Le Guin puts it:

"Fantasy is true, of course. It isn't factual, but it is true. Children know that. Adults know it too, and that is precisely why many of them are afraid of fantasy. They know that its truth challenges, even threatens, all that is false, all that is phony, unnecessary, and trivial... They are afraid of dragons, because they are afraid of freedom."

Of course the important thing to remember about this particular essay is that Le Guin is using "dragons" and "fantasy" as a shorthand for "fiction in general", and you could the mistrust of Fantasy in the twentieth century with the mistrust of the novel in the nineteenth. A lot of fantasy readers (and, by extension, some fantasy writers) go further. Like Changeling they come to view "elves and dragons and shit" as being synonymous with imagination, and to view imagination as the only virtue required in humanity, instead of as part of a healthy, well rounded personality.

Sensible proponents of Fantasy argue that it is perfectly okay to like dragons and wizards, and that the presence of fantasy elements does not make a story frivolous. Less sensible proponents of fantasy seem to want to argue that it is perfectly okay to like nothing except dragons and wizards, and that fantasy elements make a story more meaningful by their mere inclusion. This is particularly common in fandom and geekdom, where people are massively more inclined to focus on the details of a particular setting (elves, vampires, wizards) than on the actual contents of the narrative (destruction of rural England, coming-of-age in small town America, why suicide is totally heroic).

Obviously, I don't want a return to the nineteenth century, I don't want a world where nobody reads fiction, or where it isn't considered perfectly okay to pick up the odd bit of Laurel K Hamilton if you feel like something light and pulpy, but I am deeply concerned about a Fantasy genre that is coming to view fantasy as an end in itself. That's fine if you're aspiring to nothing more than light holiday reading, but a lot of fantasy (even, or perhaps I should say especially children's fantasy) takes itself very seriously, and it's ludicrous to try to deal with "real" issues in something that's totally divorced from the real world. You can't show us the reality of war in a world where everybody acts like an overgrown five-year-old and people only die when the author is trying to make a point.

Fantasy is not factual, and because it is not factual it must remain true, and the truth is that the real world matters, and that real people are amazing, and a Hero who doesn't return is no hero at all.

Themes:

J.K. Rowling, Books, TV & Movies, Sci-fi / Fantasy, Whedonverse

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Arthur B

at 15:31 on 2008-09-27I'm reminded a little, in fact, of Terry Gilliam's

Tideland

, which kind-of repudiates the fantasy-as-an-end-in-itself stance he took in some of his earlier films: in that one you have plenty of people who use fantasy as a means of escaping from the world around them, with the result that their lives are completely stagnant and horrible, and you've got the protagonist who uses fantasy to endure the world around her whilst still progressing through it, so she comes out the other end more-or-less unscathed and with a potential adoptive mum to boot.

You've glossed over an aspect of the Hero's Journey a little, which is that when the Hero returns to the everyday world he isn't just a fuller and more complete man, he actually enriches the everyday world by the fact that he's gone on this journey in the first place.

Lord of the Rings

is an exceptionally good example of this; not only are the Hobbits better people for having gone to fight Sauron, but when they get back they solve the Shire's problems and then (for the most part) become its primary movers and shakers for the next generation. Arguably, part of the problem with the way Buffy developed was that whilst Buffy's own real life problems were often solved by her adventures, she didn't so much enrich the community by her adventures so much as prolong the death throes of the status quo: things gradually get worse, and worse, and worse in Sunnydale until it all goes to shit. Harry Potter's magical studies not only have no beneficial effects for his community in the mundane world, he's actually legally prevented from letting that happen.

I think the problem with Hero's Journey type narratives in fantasy set in the modern day is that "it's the modern day, but with vampires" seems far too close to the real world, if you see what I mean. Back in the day it was sufficient for the hero to walk a long long long way away and people could accept that "oh, OK, way over there is the land of magic and adventure". The problem with the likes of Buffy and Potter is that the land of magic and adventure is

right on their doorstep

, and this actually makes the return to the real world slightly problematic; because the vampires and werewolves and death eaters are in such close proximity (physically and in terms of always getting in each other's face), you'd expect the hero to be concerned about them all the time. The reason

Narnia

does the Hero's Journey so well is precisely because Narnia is a mythic otherworld which it's non-trivial to get to, and I would argue that that's a requirement for any mythic otherworld in a Hero's Journey-based story: if you can get to the Hellmouth by walking down the street then that's not so much a Hero's Journey as a Hero's Morning Jog.

I suspect the answer is to use a different myth for modern-day fantasy.

Supernatural

seems to get a lot of mileage (no pun intended) out of the old Lone Ranger/Fugitive "Eternal Wanderer" story (which has the advantage that it's a lot easier to adapt to television, because you can spin it out for as long as you damn well like, whereas the Hero's Journey pretty much demands an end point).

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Andy G

at 20:52 on 2008-10-05Great article! That really put the finger on something that had been bugging me, except actually I hadn't realised it had been bugging me until I read the article. I was just wondering how you think Star Wars would fit into the pattern of the Hero's return, as you'd given that as an example of one closely written to the pattern, but it doesn't seem as clear-cut an example as the LotR or others where the magical world/magical powers are left behind?

Possibly a stupid question as you have clearly read a lot of stuff ABOUT fantasy (where on earth do you find it? I mean I do like to read fantasy, but I can barely ever find anything interesting written about it - except on Ferretbrain, of course) but have you read On Fairy Stories by Tolkien? It covers a lot of the themes from above, and it's one of my favourite essays with some really well-made points.

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Arthur B

at 21:15 on 2008-10-05As far as I can tell, the supposed precise mapping of

Star Wars

to the Hero's Journey is a bit ropey, and came about mainly because John Campbell was all "Hey,

Star Wars

fits the Hero's Journey perfectly" and George Lucas said "Oh... really? I mean, yes. Yes it does."

So working out where all the various bits and pieces fit in is sometimes tricky, but I think the Hero's Return is very much there, although it's pretty much described in a single scene - it's the bit at the end where they're all getting their medals and all the rebel forces cheer them. Having ventured into the depths of the Death Star's chasm and faced the dark lord, Luke emerges victorious and the community (said community being the rebellion) is enriched for it. That's all you really need for the Hero's Return - tenuous, I know, but so's the entire Hero's Journey idea to begin with.

(The end of Return of the Jedi is interesting in this light, actually - the community is having a big party, but Luke isn't really part of it - he's off at the edge, burning his father's body and communing with ghosts, his experiences finally alienating him from his community because he's endured so many things that have no parallel in the common experience of the war - hundreds of people can claim they were involved in the attack on Death Star II, for example, but only Luke actually saw Darth Vader's true face.)

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Dan H

at 16:29 on 2008-10-06

I've not read it actually (I'm far less well read than I pretend to be, I just shout my opinions loudly and hope people assume I've done some research).

As for Star Wars, the "real world" if you want to call it that in the SW saga is (IMO) the Rebellion, the big deal is that while Luke goes off and learns from Jedi Masters and confronts Darth Vader, it's the regular guys in the guns-and-bombs shooting war that he comes back to. Our Esteemed Editor also points out that Luke's return to Han and Leia is a quite literal return to family at the end of the series.

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Sister Magpie

at 20:38 on 2008-10-30Great article! I've been catching up and had just read your review where you asked why someone would have to add fantasy to New York City to find a sense of wonder--quoting that paragraph that's a beautiful image strangely undermined by the addition of werewolves, fairies, vampires and mermaids. (Central Park, Chinatown, the Hudson River are all far more interesting.)

I've always liked "our world, but with magic" in terms of books starting in our world rather than a totally different secondary world, but I totally agree with this--because as you say, setting something in our world and adding magic doesn't have to mean that our world is the world that sucks or can't hold it's own. A sense of home is always present in LOTR and that makes the Shire stand up as just as wonderful as any magical place.

It reminds me of the book Hatchet that I had to read a couple years ago for a thing I was doing on YA books. I have only ever read that book, but there are several in the series. It's not fantasy, it's about a boy who survives a plane crash and must survive alone in the Canadian wilderness. But in the end he's rescued and there's other books, some of which follow a "what if?" scenario where he never leaves the woods. What struck me about the synopses of the later books was that the main character pretty much wound up going off to live in the forest. He didn't like civilization any more and preferred his solitary life.

The idea seemed to be that the author enjoyed the more "real" life experience of fighting for your survival, hunting your own food etc. But I thought it made the whole series a failure by not realizing that the point of a Vision Quest is to find out how you can help your community. Deciding to be a hermit--a fine choice in other contexts--is here just selfish and avoiding the responsibilities of being an adult in the community.

It's just important to make the distinction between this really being a flaw in Urban fantasy and it being just something urban fantasists can use it for.

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Dan H

at 15:25 on 2008-11-17Hiya, sorry it took me so long to reply (this just in, doing NaNo is

hard

). Thought I'd clarify one particular point:

It's just important to make the distinction between this really being a flaw in Urban fantasy and it being just something urban fantasists can use it for.

Oh absolutely. By "a flaw in Urban Fantasy" I basically meant it in the specific, subjective sense (as in "this is something I consider to be a flaw in the works of urban fantasy which I have personally read") not a fundamental weakness of the genre.

I find it particularly infuriating since so much Urban Fantasy is either targeted at children or "young adults" and if there's one thing that young adults *don't* need to be told, it's that being an adult is for losers.

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Sonia Mitchell

at 01:52 on 2009-06-25Once again I know this is old, but I hadn't read any Campbell when you wrote this. I'm rehashing now I've read enough of

Hero With a Thousand Faces

to comment. Not all of it, I have to add (psychology texts bore me) but a fair amount (I'm also cribbing the exact terms from

here

because it's been a few months since I touched the book).

And while I agree with the points you make, Dan, I don't think HWATF backs them up. It's not a check-list of ingredients for a story, but a variety of factors of which some (not all) can be found in a given hero's journey. Refusing to return

a valid stage of the journey, even if it makes for an unsatisfying narrative. I agree that it marks Harry out as an immature hero, just as I think it does Achilles and the Sandman and the Pevensies (who never intended to return home in TLTW&TW). For most of us there does come that point where we stop thinking Dorothy's mad for wanting to go back to Kansas (we grow the fuck up, as you so rightly say), but nevertheless according to Campbell heroes who don't return are still heroes.

Suicide

can

be 'totally heroic' in the classical model Campbell's following, which isn't using heroes as role models. Working in the chivalric model, which I think maybe you are, naturally it isn't. And Harry Potter seems to strongly invite one to take the chivalric viewpoint, right up to telling us how 'gallant' Harry is for protecting a(n extremely competent) woman with an unforgivable curse. If nothing else, the cosmetic details (suits of armour, portraits of damsels, Arthurian treasures and constant references to Merlin) are knightly not classical, and invite one to take a certain perspective (there might be an article in this, actually...).

As far as I can tell, the supposed precise mapping of Star Wars to the Hero's Journey is a bit ropey, and came about mainly because John Campbell was all "Hey, Star Wars fits the Hero's Journey perfectly" and George Lucas said "Oh... really? I mean, yes. Yes it does."

Which I'd say is the right way to do things - treating. HWATF as a tool for analysis rather than an instruction manual on how to write fiction. I think consciously ticking off the elements of the hero's journey would make for a rather boring (not to mention contradictory) story, since the natural temptation would be to take them far too literally. I'll take tenuous any day :-)

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http://ruderetum.blogspot.com/

at 16:20 on 2009-09-10Great article and it immediately reminded me of Guy Gavriel Kay's Fionavar trapesty, which is a bit narnian in its basic plot, has some slight elements of urban fantasy and I thin generally is a surprisingly awesome take on what seems on the surfce to be an awfully cliched fantasy world. Commenting on heroic suicides, I think this one has one brilliantly haunting example and a few others might qualify as well.

But really made me recollec this is the development of Dave, who is kind of an average guy compared to the rest of the cast and doesn't get any cool pwers or even the girl or anything. But in a very awesome ending, without any sense of needless fanfare, you know that he'll return back to the real world and things will be okay.

I won't explain more because I'd hate to spoil it for any one and I guess it would be a bit tedious.

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#Ferretbrain #Harry Potter #J.K. Rowling #Buffy the Vampire Slayer #Ursula K. Le Guin #The Mortal Instruments #Cassandra Clare

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foxissofoxy · 7 years ago

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My current muse…

“Love is blind, they say; sex is impervious to reason and mocks the power of all philosophers. But, in fact, a person’s sexual choice is the result and sum of their fundamental convictions. Tell me what a person finds sexually attractive and I will tell you their entire philosophy of life. Show me the person they sleep with and I will tell you their valuation of themselves. No matter what corruption they’re taught about the virtue of selflessness, sex is the most profoundly selfish of all acts, an act which they cannot perform for any motive but their own enjoyment - just try to think of performing it in a spirit of selfless charity! - an act which is not possible in self-abasement, only in self-exultation, only on the confidence of being desired and being worthy of desire. It is an act that forces them to stand naked in spirit, as well as in body, and accept their real ego as their standard of value. They will always be attracted to the person who reflects their deepest vision of themselves, the person whose surrender permits them to experience - or to fake - a sense of self-esteem .. Love is our response to our highest values - and can be nothing else.” ― Ayn Rand ——————————————————————————————- “What’s that?”

I was silent. I could honestly hear what my friend was hearing. There wasn’t any denying it. The walls that separated my Dads bedroom from my own were practically paper thin based on the sound effects that were coming from his side.

My lack of response confirmed to my friend Andre that what he was hearing was the sound of-sex.

“That’s your Dad?”

I nodded.

“Wow! He’s really giving it to her.”

We both listened to the headboard knocking against the far wall, the rocking of the bed and my Dad grunting as he encouraged for more and faster.

“Since when did your Dad start back to dating?”

"Not sure. I do know he’s banging. Now you know too.”

“I didn’t know he had a girlfriend.”

“I didn’t either.”

Andre and I did our usual fist bump and peace sign. He was out. Deuces.

I have known my Dad for 15 years, all my life actually. I can recall the earliest memory of him. I guess it’s the moment we all become self-aware based on a significant moment where an insignificant memory begins to build and retain on top of other long ago father and son activities. What I can’t remember is ever hearing him have sex with my Mom. Ever. The thought alone was cringe-worthy to think of my parents in that way. This new set of events that was on its fourth night, a school night I might add was something I would have to bring to his attention.

“Oh my God, Rick…Oh, my God. Right-ahh-there. Ohhh,Yes. Yesssss…Yessss.”

“You like how I’m giving it to you? You like this?”

My Dad was asking her over and over again. She finally responded to him.

“Yesssss. Oh, Yes. Yes. Yes.”

“I fucking live for this-All of this. Right here. Oh shit. Yessss.”

I wanted my Dad to say nothing else. I only wanted to hear her.

Whoever she was, she was way more vocal this time around with the oooh and aaahs that I couldn’t help but have more of a boner as long as my Dad kept quiet or quiet enough where I could unleash my teen fantasy on Beth Smith who worked in the lunchroom.

Beth Smith was four years older than me, and she was my girl crush, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday. Sunday was spent in the Catholic church where I spilled every sordid detail to Father Gabriel in the confessional booth. The heathen side of me was reborn every Monday like clock-work when my eyes would lock with hers in the cafeteria line.

I would fantasize about Beth. I imagined Beth and me together almost obsessively. I reached for the cock sock that I kept in my nightstand drawer. I was ready to burst at the seams. I was prepared until my Dad yelled, “Myyyyyyyyy. EHHHHH. Uhhhh.” Then silence. Seconds later, giggles. UGHH. I put my sock back in my drawer for another time.

Our confrontation happened in the kitchen.

I waited for him to come out of his bedroom the next morning. My Dad was dressed in his uniform. He’s a Deputy Sheriff. Our routine was always the same routine since Mom left him for what she considered a better life going on three years ago. He was adjusting his gun belt. I was at the kitchen table doodling guitar tabs to piano chords that were running through my mind at high speed. I am a gifted Pianist. I’ve also been told that I am a dark spirit. I take it as a compliment that my genius has manifested in order take over the world by storm.

“You missed the bus?” He was surprised to see me still home.

“I didn’t sleep.”

“Do you want me to take the TV out of your room along with your game system?”

This was his usual threat that he never acted on, but he felt it was a motivator for good behavior to not miss the bus 4 days in a row.

“I could turn up the volume of my TV to drown out other noises, but then neither one of us would get any sleep.”

“What are you talking about, Carl?”

I didn’t have a chance to answer because his phone vibrated loudly and his attention was on whatever was displayed. The smirk on his lips was every indication that it wasn’t work-related. If I had someone to bet against, I would put my whole life savings that it had everything to do with last night and the night before and the night before that and so on. I watched his fingers move and wondered when did he ever become so proficient with texting?

“You aren’t staying home. I will take you to school. If you get detention, you are going to serve it. I am not going to get you out of trouble.”

“Who is she?”

He began to search the refrigerator for the creamer. It was right in front of him, but it was like he couldn’t see it. It took him a whole 10 seconds to grab it. The refrigerator wasn’t stocked with much.

“Who’s who?”

“Who is it that you have in your bedroom?”

“What?”

“No. Who?”

“Oh.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah.”

I allowed him to have that. Her name was Oh. I was going to give him time to clarify if Oh was an Asian lady or if Oh meant something different. But it was more like a dragged out Ohhhhhh!

My Dad poured himself a cup of coffee, forgetting the creamer as he stirred and texted. He placed two slices of visibly green pieces of moldy bread in the toaster. I sat back and watched with amusement.

“We only have one Oh that I am aware of and he’s the math teacher.” I was referencing my former math teacher Glen Oh. My Dad knew Glen on a personal level for years. “Are you messing around with his wife Maggie Oh who works in the library?”

“For God sakes no.”

“Then?”

“For shit sakes, Carl. I’m not messing around. What’s happening…What’s going on is just…”

“Just what?”

“Different.”

“Different?”

“Very different.”

“You’ve had Jessie over, and I never heard anything. So, I guess. Whatever.”

My Dad was right, whoever he’s banging in his bedroom this time around has caused him to have an incredible vocal range of a grunting caveman that has scarred my brain for life.

"That was over a year ago. It was a mistake. Something I regret. Something that I would rather die than repeat.”

The Jessie fiasco.

The woman who was so abused and found her way into our home, in my father’s bed with her two sons attached to her hip sharing my bedroom whenever she came around. I would immediately take to the couch or stayed at my best friend, Andre’s home that was positioned directly behind where I lived. I would stay with him and his parents until where I lived with my Dad was cleared of the pests. I’d never liked Sam nor Ron. Their Mom was a Milf but not much else.

It still didn’t answer who could have my Dad flustered in revealing who he wanted to have sit on his face. Knowing what I know, I will never, ever drink or eat anything after my Dad. He likes to eat this person, and my brain will forever remember where his lips have been.

He took a look at his phone that indicated he got another message.

“I have to get my keys.”

I’m sitting back twirling my pencil between my fingers casually watching him set his phone down on the kitchen counter to go in search for his car keys. The keys were by the front door where he always leaves them. He went into his bedroom as if the keys would be in there.

His phone…

I was compelled to see. To investigate and hopefully have answers before he comes back out of his bedroom down the short hall.

Queen: Is Carl still home?

Rick: Yes. I will take him to school, and then you can slip out.

Queen: I was thinking about playing hooky. You in that uniform, yum.

Rick: That can be arranged. I’m crazy about you.

Queen: Oh yeah?

Rick: My son heard us last night.

Queen: No!

Rick: We may have to come clean.

Queen: Come into your bedroom NOW!

Whoever he’s banging was still in our home, and her name was Queen. Queen? Queen Elizabeth? We didn’t have any Queens that I was aware of in our small enough town to know a name like that. A name like that would stick out. Whoever he’s’ banging is royalty. This news is Gold. I couldn’t help chuckling.

The toast was finished. I tossed it in the trash along with the rest of the moldy loaf. I put the creamer back in the refrigerator while still scrolling through my Dad’s messages. I found a lot of sexting shared between him and Queen.

Rick: I can still taste you.

Queen: It’s my turn tonight.

Rick: Wonder if you can handle it.

Queen: Don’t doubt me.

Rick: Will I have to hold back?

Queen: I plan to swallow.

Rick: Yeah?

Queen: Lick every drop.

The sound of his bedroom door opening was enough to cause a slight panic to run through me. I turned his phone off.

“Carl, hand me my phone and let’s get going.”

“Did you find your keys in your bedroom?” I played it off cool walking over to him with his phone. It helped that he was visibly distracted by whatever happened in his bedroom.

“Why would I go into my bedroom for my keys? My keys are always by the front door.”

His response was an indication that he wasn’t 100 percent himself. I was going to have some fun.

“Dad, I left something in your bedroom. I’m going to check to see if…”

My Dad’s whole attitude had changed lightning fast. His agitation was on butt load when I boldly began walking past him heading to his bedroom. He grabbed my arm and hauled me out the front door with a not so friendly shove, slamming the front door behind him.

“Hey, I was just joking!” I pretended to be upset with him handling me the way he did.

“Let’s go.”

My Dad was pissed off. He didn’t give two shits.

Now going to school was another matter. I hated school. I hated the whispers about my Dad and Principal Benton. I hated the drop-off in his cruiser almost equally to everything else I hated.

The rumors were annoying to Andre, too. We were in the same gifted classes. Andre is a talented violinist. He’s gifted on the piano as well as having the sickest rap lyrics of all time. I’m his biggest fan. He’s considered to have a dark spirit too. He doesn’t care because he knows he’s going to take over the world by musical storm one motherfucking kick drum at a time.

Andre’s mom’s the Principal at our high school. His Dad is an attorney who works in Alexandria. I’ve only met his Dad a couple of times. He seemed very chill but his Mom…Principal Benton didn’t have much of a sense of humor. She was no-nonsense, by the book, and she rode us both hard if we were acting like delinquents. I have to be honest, Principal Benton was annoying as fuck in school.

I sat in the cruiser. My Dad’s mind was evidently a million miles away as he drove the usual route that was considered the fastest in the direction of King’s Gifted Academy. The road with no sidewalks was the reason for many of us to have to ride the bus if we weren’t lucky to have a parent willing to take us to school every day or old enough to have a license to drive. I much preferred the bus than the cruiser.

“Who’s My Queen?”

“I don’t know, Carl.”

I watched my Dad try to swallow his lie.

“What do you mean, you don’t know? Do you just randomly text people about still tasting them?”

“What have I told you about snooping?”

“You know there are rumors, right?”

“What rumors?”

“You tell me who’s My Queen and I’ll tell you about what everyone seems to be talking about.”

There was no deal to be made other than maybe a silent epiphany that I could hear everything on the other side of the walls. I just couldn’t see through them.

“I met someone. Well, I’ve known her for awhile, and you may know who she is and right now we aren’t ready. She’s not ready.”

“Ready for what?”

“To commit. To commit to me. I’m giving her time to handle things. She asked me for that, and I am giving her that.”

“Sounds like you’ve been giving her more than that.”

“Carl!”

“Dad!” I challenged him.

“There’s a reason your mother has you with me. You know that?”

“I’ve never heard her having crazy sex.”

“I’m sorry about that son. I wasn’t aware that we could be overheard and now that I know we will be more discreet about things.”

“There’s the Holiday Inn. There’s the Red Roof and Meryl’s Lodge.”

“Next time we will be quieter. If there is damn next time.”

By the time my Dad dropped me off in the school parking lot,I had noticed something else odd about his behavior, and it was what he didn’t do next.

“See you later, Dad.”

“Yeah.”

He didn’t drive off. He was texting again. He didn’t even realize I got out of the car or that I was watching him from a distance.

He got out of his cruiser probably thinking that I had gone inside of the school. Principal Benton had already pulled in to her designated parking spot.

Their confrontation happened in the parking lot.

I watched my Dad approach her without any regard to who could be watching or possibly overhearing what looked to be a very controlled, heated disagreement.

I wasn’t close enough to hear what they were saying, but I did find it odd that Andre’s mom had on the same clothes from the night before that she wore to our soccer game. Her and my Dad wore matching sweatshirts with our school logo last night which could mean nothing because there were a few that had them on. Easy to dismiss.

My Dad was sitting behind her in the stands cheering our team on. Andre and I were forced in sitting the game out courtesy of coach Abe with the blessings from Principal Benton. Our stunt two weeks ago had affected almost everything in our lives. We were considered God’s by our peers but devils by our elders.

I refused to believe what was apparently true.

My Dad was having an affair with my very married Principal who was also my best friend in the world’s mother. She is who he’s banging, and I’d acquired videotaped proof a few days later that I just sent to all my contacts by accident.

——————————— https://m.fanfiction.net/s/12954337/1/

#ff.net

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