#land of illision

[swaggerblonde]

Swagger Blonde Let's Plays Land Of Illusion Sega Master System Part 2 Blacksmith’s Castle and Shrinking Potion

[falsebooles123]

Diary of a Horror Bufff 8.30.22

Ugh two days left bitches two days left.

Also I woke up at like 1 today (in the afternoon) so i feel riproaring to get some stuff done in the meantime what this means is that I'm gonna do a small chore between each of the movies we're watching and since I already sent off a work email I get a freebie ok les go.

Creepshow 2 (1987) dir. Michael Gornick

ok so I speant a bunch of time talking about this on letterboxd so check it out there but the main gist is that while its not as good as the original I still had fun.

Chicken of the Dead (2019) dir. Julien David

A beautiful story about a libertarian telling big goverment to go fuck themselves and they restrictive ideas of "how much food should be in foodstuff" and "not turning people into chicken zombies".

Irradiation (2021) dir. Sava Zivkovic

ok so this animation style is insane, like is this what console video games are like. I'm used to people looking like this.

homegirl with that bullet bra.

this is basically like a full ass video game teaser trailer where this russian scientist treks through a burnt irradiated forest to look at this eldritch anomily. I can't even explain further this is like AAA grade like sci-fi animation. this shit could have a whole ass TV show I am obsessed just fucking watch it.

Satan At Play (1907) dir. Segundo de Chomón

I mean we love a synopsis that starts with UWU "satan was bored"

so this is less narrative then the letterboxd discription implies. This is essentially more like a magic show Satan is bored and so in a revue style he pulls off a series of illisions more daring then the last which even like a hundred years later the effects are spectacular.

Bottom line is that Segudo is a bad bitch.

The Man with Wax Faces (1914) dir. Maurice Tourneur

ok so this would have proabbaly been a lot more impactful if I spoke french since this film uses a lot, and I mean a lot, of intertitles. Bonus points is that it really fun to read french in an absolutely awful french accent.

The plot for this is pretty basis some dude like you bro I double dog dare you to spend some time in the wax museum oh I'm sorry, *said in a horrible french accent* un musee de figures de cire. The dudes goes insane apparently and proceeds to murder his friend when he comes into the musee de figures de cire to play a silly little prank on him.

Vengeance (pomsta) (1968) dir. Jirí Brdecka

not to be confused with Vengeance(1968), the western staring Richard Harrison, (the 60s actor not the guy who runs pawn stars.)

ugh this bussy. fuck it up king

ok so this shit has the same vibe as one of those ted ed riddles videos. you know which ones I'm talking about.

this was the closest gif I could find.

basically some dude being a little beta male cuck and writing a poem to his girfriend when this CHAD comes over and is like you bitch ditch this looser I'm good at fighting and shes like bet. So he goes to his upstairs neighbor whose a witch or something and shenanigans, (faustian deals and idle hands) ensue.

also pretty much every chick in this just straight up got her titties out like shes lady freedom

Isabelle Aux Dombes (1951) dir Maurice Pialat

ok so it turns out "The Dombes" is a place in france thats basically pasture land that has a bunch of shallow ponds.

this movie is sort of non narrative or at least surreal. Essentially the character takes a trip to The Dombes, and just sort of gets lost. the imagedry gets more explicitly about death until the character literally dresses up as Chiron and crosses one of the ponds to look at a gravestone with Isabelle name on it.

gives me this energy.

Ghost Town Frolics (1938) dir. Lester Kline

ok so this is a fun silly little cartoon. this was part of the New Universal and Walter Lantz productions cartoons. Yes Walter Lantz as the guy who did Woody Woodpecker. No Idea who Lester Kline is and the information I have on him is a bit limited. Also the characters for this are the simple simians, who are apparently chipanzee siblings. Normally I find monkeys to be kinda freaky but these ones are cute.

bitch I got good reason

this was cute though it had some fun gags and the characters were fun.

Krazy Spooks (1933) dir. Manny Gould, Ben Harrison

so apparently there are like four directors in this but I'm only including the first two.

so this one featues Krazy Kat who was made by Charles Mintz and produced by Columbia Pictures.

So this is kinda just another random ass huanted house cartoon. Theres some sight gags, some bedsheets ghosts and this one has a gorilla which is actually pretty new. some murder on rue morgue realness I guess.

The Binding Box CRYPT TV (2017) dir. Ramsey Attia

ok so this one was fun. Basically this girl gets a mysterious box in the mail and UWU its a creppy clown in a jack in the box. so yeah obvious spooky thing is spooky. This is just a fun time and we love the aestetic.

I think I have one more video left for today so lets vibe.

Pregnancy Test (2016) dir. Fergal Costello

ok I haven't seen this in years but I fucking love this. basically a women takes a Prenancy test and it comes back as "having the antichrist"??? oh also its a contraception PSA so I mean we have to stan.

anyway bitches thats pretty much it for today I think I won't be doing any blogging tomorrow but I will finish off the challenge.

anyway whores stay tuned cause your getting a full ass video next time.

[yurious-george]

The Bubble

So I’ve been listening to “A Slenderman Musical” for days on end, and had ideas about the librarians. I love them so much? So here is a fic thing on why they helped the humans make their bubble. It feels a little childish and detached, but that’s almost what I’m going for, so?

Once upon a time, there were beings who loved order. Every day, they would make land as flat as possible, tear up the trees and replant them in perfect arrays, and trim them so every leaf was perfect. However, they would all be horribly disorganized by next morning, and the Beings would start all over again; if starting over meant re-trimming the leaves, filling in minuscule holes, and other things no one else would notice.

Sometimes Children would come their way, ruining things. When they ruined things, the Children did not return to Mother. But one day, the smartest Child, a human, came to them.

"Please do not hurt us," the human said. "We are hiding from Mother. We do not like to be hunted. She will never look here."

The Beings shook their heads. "You will cause entropy," they said. "You are too disorderly."

The human cried. "We can not go back to Mother. She will eat us. We want to be free."

Seeing the human weep caused the Beings to feel pity.

"You can make beautiful things," said a Being wearing the skin of a rake who broke a branch. "We would like to wear beautiful skins. We cannot exist without a vessel to contain us, nor create interesting, chaotic things like you. If you make us beautiful skins and chaotic things for us to organize, we will help you."

The human wept, but of joy. "Yes, anything. Anything would be a bargian for freedom."

"You will not be free," said the Beings. "We can not make new Realms. We will make you a pretty cage with illisions and glamors. You will have to mantain it to keep it from cracking."

"Yes."

"You truly prefer to live in a pretty lie than an ugly truth?"

"Yes."

"We will never understand you," The beings said. Once extended a hand to the human, and the human took it. "We have a deal."

"Thank you." NOTE: Us Beings love our teddy bear suits. The smell of old books, especially those in alphabetical order, is quite lovely too.