#lads — continuous symphony

[starmocha]

Have you noticed this scene with the claymore in the ground...looks like it's in a field of poppy?

In case you're curious about its symbolic meaning...

(Source)

This down here may be nothing, but it could mean something, who knows what the devs cooked up 😭😭😭

[villainbait]

"Why are you so worried? I just want to rest for a bit. I won't die." ©2024 _mooniedraws (Posted here with permission, please support them on instagram)

[soli-nepenthe]

Not me getting teary-eyed over Sylus's No Way Out (Tender Moments) story. Kudos once again to his VA for delivering his lines with so much emotion. I will probably be bawling when we get more hints from his lore.

[elexaria]

price is a good influence on the boys, always keeping them in line. its almost like theyre his boys, he doesn’t pass up the opportunity to talk about them with a proud growl in his voice. they dont know this, but he even has a tattered photo of the four of them in his wallet. he’s never settled down, never had kids, so even if theyre only around a decade younger than him, they’re like his own.

well, he’s almost always a good influence on the boys.

the new bit around the military campus, she’s a sight for sore eyes. the capt can’t help but clear his throat, one arm around her shoulder so casually. he’s a charmer, that’s for sure. “don’t let ‘em paw at you, yeah? you tell ‘ol pricey if these dogs bark at you, love, and i’ll let ‘em know who holds the reigns here.” he purrs in her ear, the rough timbre of his voice is enough to make anyone’s blood run hot.

the boys know better than to try and cuckhold price, after all, he’s kind enough to let them watch him as he flirts with the lil honey on base. their eyes watch keenly as he squeezes her arse as she passes by, a smug grin on his lips as she turns around with a playful gasp. he’ll turn his head, nodding with a grunt at the boys. “y’see that, lads? like putty in my hands, she is.” he remarks, and the boys guffaw like a group of schoolboys at how cool he is.

it gets even better when, after a year of casual dating, his lil lady agrees to let the boys in behind closed doors. “just let ‘em watch, yeah? poor boys dont get much action, it’s for morale i ‘spose. keeps ‘em fit and fired up.” he murmurs lowly in her ear, quiet enough only for her to hear. their dance is as old as time, his large hands dancing around her soft skin. her moans are like a siren’s call to the boys, it gets the hairs at the nape of their necks standing. hell, that’s not the only thing that stands to attention when price parts the glistening folds of her cunt, chuckling as he steps back to nod his head at the boys. “stunning, ‘ent she?” he growls out, a smug grin on his face as he leans on his side, dipping two fingers inside of her slowly while his thumb toys with her clit.

my god, you can HEAR the boy’s heavy breathing as they watch price toy with his girl, and johnny’s the first one to break the awkwardness by rubbing his erection through his jeans discreetly. price notices, and raises his eyebrows. “lads, the missus doesn’t mind if you rub one out. do you, sweetheart?” he coos as he crooks his fingers up inside of her, jamming the pads of his fingers up into the spongy spot where she likes it. she gasps, nodding as she looks over at how quickly the lads begin to unbuckle their belts, their cocks quickly springing up out of their confines. a symphony of grunts that harmoniously blend together with her gasps and mewls, and all are at the mercy of price. he continues to toy with her, to prolong her pleasure until, and it doesn’t take long, until the boys cum right then and there— thick ropes of cum spurting into their fists.

with a chuckle, price rises to sit on the bed, his hand now gently rubbing against her folds in a teasing manner. “right, bugger off you bunch of reprobates. give us some privacy, yeah?” he chuckles, motioning towards the door as they’re all quick to tuck their spent cocks in the waistbands of their boxers, quickly scampering off at the call of their captain.

the next morning, they’ll all sit round a small table, making comments about how good price is, how lucky they are to have seen that performance. “he deffo would let us shag her if we asked, ye ken.” johnny says quietly, leaning in close to the lads in a conspiratorial manner.

“johnny, stop thinking with your dick.” simon gruffly replies, shaking his head as to dismiss the silly notion.

“yeah, no way would he let us.” gaz agrees, a defeated sigh escaping his lips as he leans back in his seat. “she was fit, though.” he chuckles, rubbing his face as they all begin to impishly laugh at the memory.

[hyvyinjie]

CHANCE.

TW! implications of death.

bittersweet! melancholic

t. muichiro x f. reader

graciously requested by @muuumuiiii ! thank you so much for requesting, you sweet lovely lad<3

who would have anticipated it? the mist hashira, of all individuals, displaying a concern that surpassed anyone else's for you—the spirit pillar; a warrior whose technique came at the steep cost of a gradual erosion of your life.

THE MOON; THE BRIGHTEST PEARL SUSPENDED IN OUR VELVET SKY THAT FLOODED THE INKY DARKNESS WITH ITS SILVER GLOW.

a radiant disc it was. casting its ethereal glow upon the shadows of the night, while also heralding the relentless onslaught of a few infamous entities—demons.

a symbol of hope, this pale sentinel embodied a goddess-like presence, standing as a timeless guardian, observing the earth with an unwavering gaze as warriors valiantly battled the monstrous creatures scattered throughout.

above, the luminous orb commanded the vast expanse of stars, illuminating them all. yet, even in this peaceful night, two particular slayers found themselves immersed in the serenity, although one seemed burdened by a more pressing concern, far beyond the tranquility itself.

in a world where such creatures roamed, the perfect harmony would remain elusive.

thus, what purpose did survival serve if death constantly loomed, a persistent visitor at one's very doorstep?

well, the purpose of life is to be happy. or at least, that's what this young man believed.

said boy possessed an acute understanding of this belief, as if it had become ingrained in the very fabric of his being—an awareness that, perhaps, bordered on the excessive.

the sheer ecstasy of savoring every moment of existence, embracing its essence in its entirety, was undeniably a remarkable achievement—a feat that deserved to be celebrated with fervor.

thus, he found himself utterly incapable of comprehending—indeed, he never had—how she could nonchalantly dismiss the imminent cessation of her own existence, as if it were a trifling matter. the weight of her disregard for her own life gnawed at him, like a persistent ache that defied understanding.

..then again, had he been any different?

"—and…now you’re spacing out, again.”

ah, the sound of that melodious voice; both longed for and dreaded, resonated within him and snapped him out of his reverie. even though he had incessantly poured out his thoughts to her since he awakened from his coma, with her faithfully by his side, deep in slumber—despite her own exhaustion—she had remained.

as your words echoed in his ears, he shifted his gaze to meet your own—and oh, those eyes.

he would give anything to forever witness his own reflection in the depths of your eyes.

in a mesmerizing dance, your gazes intertwined; an exquisite tapestry woven with delicate threads of connection.

he couldn't help but be entranced by the sheer magnificence of your irises—their majesty akin to rare crystalline treasures, gleaming beneath the majestic canopy of the nocturnal sky.

as a gentle zephyr whispered sweet nothings, its delicate touch caressed their beings, a tender embrace from the invisible hands of nature. he watched, his eyelids descending to a half-closed state, surrendering to the enchanting symphony of the night.

the breeze, like a playful sprite, felt as if it alone, could carry away his worries and sorrows, dispersing them into the velvety darkness.

yet, amidst this reposeful tranquility, a question lingered in the depths of his soul, an enigma that remained elusive and enigmatic.

it was one of the few riddles that continued to elude his grasp, an enigmatic puzzle that defied comprehension, regardless of whether he had regained his former self or not.

why, he pondered ever so deeply, did your well-being hold such profound significance to him?

why did his heart ache with an inexplicable yearning to protect you, to ensure the radiance within you remained untouched by the shadows of the world? it was as if his very purpose revolved around safeguarding your light, shielding it from the encroaching darkness threatening to dim its brilliance.

no, he never intended to diminish your worth in any way.

on the contrary—he understood, with a profound certainty, that you’re fully capable of caring for yourself alone.

yet, despite his awareness, a veil of mystery draped over his consciousness—that of a delicate wisp of mist teasing the boundaries of his understanding. it remained tantalizingly close, yet perpetually out of his reach, an enigma that eluded his grasp.

similarly elusive was the faint, almost imperceptible yet weighty pang in his heart each time his gaze flickered to your bandages that dressed your wounds.

he struggled to fathom its origins, to decipher the emotions that coursed through him with every glance. was it concern, fear, or something different altogether?

of course, he chastised himself for overreacting. after all, you were healing, weren't you?

...right?

at least, that was the relentless mantra he repeated to himself, like a haunting melody, a lullaby of self-deception.

perhaps it was a lie he constructed, a defense mechanism to shield himself from the harsh reality. deep down, he knew all too well that you were pushing yourself to the brink, sacrificing fragments of your own well-being to save countless others from the clutches of death.

how he yearned to tell you—to implore you—to cease using the very essence that slowly, yet inexorably, eroded your own vitality. the desire to shield you from the self-inflicted harm, consumed him.

yet, who was he to stand in your way?

who was he to dictate how you should pursue your purpose—your solemn vow? who had the right to demand that you discard the only technique you knew, as if acquiring a new skill were a trivial matter?

perhaps, for you, it had maybe once been a tangible option—a plausible alternative.

however, it clashed with the very reason why you chose to persist in wielding the power of spirit breathing, despite its unfortunate and devastating toll on your own being.

it was a conundrum that weighed heavily upon his soul, yet another conflict that tugged at the frayed edges of his limited understanding.

then, abruptly—his consciousness snapped back to reality, like a fragile dream shattered by the gentle sweep of a waving hand.

in that instant, the symphony of your voice, a sweet and melodious tune, graced his senses once more, stirring his spirit from its slumber.

"hello? earth to tokito?"

your words danced in the air, adorned with a delicate blend of amusement and genuine concern—whilst he, silently observed your actions. his gaze lingering for a fleeting moment, as if capturing the essence of your graceful movements.

soon enough, his eyes blinked, like a dormant star awakening to illuminate the night sky, as he finally stirred from his reverie.

with a subtle tilt of his head, he emitted a soft hum—a melodic expression that intertwined intrigue and acknowledgment in response to your beckoning. the notes of his hum danced through the air, a secretive melody that conveyed both his curiosity and the recognition of your presence.

meanwhile, you watched him with an internal sigh of relief.

the young man, whom you had believed to be forever lost in the bewitching realm of his perpetual daydreams, had returned to the realm of the present. the transformation within him, from introspective to effervescent, had you spellbound, never failing to leave you even in but a speck of awe, of these rare moments of clarity that graced his being.

"seems like someone's finally awake."

a faint smile blossoming upon your lips, akin to the first delicate bloom of a spring flower. lowering your hand with graceful grace,

you adjusted yourself to a more comfortable position beside him on the edge of the engawa outside the butterfly manor—a perch where you and him had been leisurely spending time together, without a care in the world, rambling on about. relishing in the comfort in one another’s presence—like a normal pair of souls basking in the way of life.

"you’ve been staring at me for quite a while.”

pausing for a breath, you tilted your head—the radiance of your irises blooming with an enchanting glow, as if the secrets of the universe were hidden within their depths.

"what's wrong?"

in the midst of an enchanting moment, a subtle hint of wounded innocence played across your seductive countenance, evoking a mysterious allure.

"do i look that bad?"

your voice, though as mellow and gentle as always, carried an underlying touch of vulnerability.

in an instant, he reacted, tilting his head with a subtle mixture of surprise and denial.

"what? no."

aa he blinked, his words slipped out absent-mindedly, like a whisper from a dreamer's lips.

"far from it, actually."

he confessed, his sincerity palpable.

with a gaze that held a painter's eye for detail, he saw your flaws not as imperfections, but as intricate brush strokes that added depth to the masterpiece of your being. inexplicably, he adored you, to the point where it practically pained him.

and who could blame him? for you were way more than a mere beauty that could be captured in words. you were a tapestry of emotions, a symphony of sensations that defied description.

to him, you are everything.

your brows raised slightly, captivated by his ever-unpredictable nature. truly, like the wind, he embraced the freedom to wander in any direction he pleased.

reminiscent of an owl, you blinked a plenty amount of times, momentarily stunned by the sheer audacity of his flattery. it seeped into the recesses of your heart, stirring a delicate blend of bashfulness and gratitude.

"then..."

unintentionally mimicking his gestures, as if dancing in synchrony with his spirit, you then asked, avidly yearning to explore the depths of his thoughts.

"mind sharing what's got you so..distant?"

although it was not deemed uncommon for him, of all individuals, to maintain a silent disposition, you possessed a deeper understanding—having witnessed something greater, something more.

despite the mere span of a few days, you stood as a crucial observer to the sudden shift in his demeanor. having been privy to a bewildering yet endearingly interactive side of the boy since his awakening, it became slightly disconcerting to witness him potentially regress into his characteristic, distant, and dazed state.

the memory of those extraordinary moments lingered, and it was disheartening to question whether they were mere illusions or if they held the promise of something genuine.

as of now, the male in question pressed his lips together, creating a slender line as his gaze wandered away from yours, as though searching for a brief respite from reality.

seeing this, you reassured him. carefully observing these subtle occurrences with your keen irises.

"you don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

responding with a weary shake of his head and a sigh escaping his lips, his gaze flickered back to you, and as his eyes connected with yours once more, a subtle softness overcame them.

truly breathtaking were his eyes. they possessed a hue reminiscent of emerald, yet they gleamed like the replesdent glow of the moon above.

however, what truly captured your attention was the way his brows furrowed just as the corner of his lips downturned, for internally—a cascade of emotions crashed upon him all at once. moreover, a despairing layer seemed to coat his eyes, a poignant sorrow that caught you off guard.

"i don't like it."

he stated firmly, his words hanging in the air, leaving you perplexed.

your head tilted slightly further, eyes widening as you regarded him with curiosity and intrigue.

in response, he raised a hand to the area where his heart resided, his gaze lowering and narrowing towards the ground beneath you both.

"this feeling..."

his voice carried a weight of uncertainty, gaze delicately shifted back to meet yours—and in that moment, you could have sworn you saw his frown deepen as the hint of sorrow on his features became even more pronounced.

"and knowing you could..."

he trailed off, unable to bring himself to complete his sentence. yet, the unfinished words were enough for you to grasp the essence of his meaning.

your brows upturned, sensing the profound depth of emotions he struggled to express fully through words. you had a hunch that it might be something like this, but witnessing his reaction with such intensity was, without a doubt, enough to evoke a painful ache in anyone's heart.

the desire to comfort him welled up within you, an overwhelming longing to ease his burdens. yet, you couldn't help but question how you could possibly offer reassurance.

would it be by telling a blatant lie about something that was inevitable?

now, that would be nothing short of cruelty, no?

to suggest that you would overcome it would only exacerbate the pain. moreover, you were uncertain how to approach the situation without inadvertently triggering a devastating chain of events in the unavoidable future.

truth be told, if he were anyone else, you might have dismissed the matter with a casual remark, wouldn't you?

but with him, it was different.

you couldn't bring yourself to say so.

unable to find the right words in that moment, your gaze somberly shifted away from his, fixating on a distant point ahead. yet, in a sudden and unexpected instant, you were taken aback as you felt the weight of something new but vaguely familiar resting upon your shoulder—soft strands of supple hair gently brushing against you. along with it came a delicate warmth, enveloping you in an oddly soothing sensation.

"you don't have to say anything."

he quietly uttered, his honeyed voice carrying a mix of vulnerability and reassurance. he simply needed to release his thoughts into the open, to let them be heard, even if it was just a single sentence.

there had been no intention to pressurize or burden you, but rather a desire to be the one offering reassurance while subtly seeking comfort himself.

in a silent plea to convince himself that he wasn't caught in a dream, he gingerly leaned his head against your shoulder, and though was making sure not to add any more damage to your wounds, he did so without a hint of regret.

your heart skipped a beat, overwhelmed by the depth of his actions. turning your attention back to him, you found solace in this unspoken gesture of support. that tender gesture conveyed a profound understanding, a connection that surpassed the boundaries of words. it was a silent reassurance; of ones comforting presence for the other, especially in the face of uncertainty.

a sentimental smile graced your features as you felt immense gratitude for his selfless deeds. even in this moment, he made sure you were as comfortable as possible, going above and beyond to provide solace. the warmth of his actions filled you with a deep sense of appreciation and reinforced the unmatched bond between you.

"..thank you,"

you whispered in a hushed breath, your voice carrying the weight of profound appreciation.

though the words seemed simple, they held within them an entire universe of gratitude—a universe that bloomed with vivid colors, dreamlike aspirations, and meaningful connections.

with a delicate grace, you lifted your hand and allowed your fingertips to dance upon the canvas of his raven tresses. each strand, like a silken thread, wove a tapestry of sensations beneath your touch.

the texture was soft and supple, akin to the gentle caress of a summer breeze. as your fingers glided through the ebony strands, you embarked on a journey of intricate care, smoothing out the knots that dared to disrupt the harmony.

in this intimate act, time seemed to suspend, creating a space where the world faded away, leaving only the two of you in a transcendent moment. your touch, as mindful as the brushstrokes of an artist, traced a path of tenderness and care. each movement held intention, a pledge to protect and cherish him, ensuring no harm would befall his vulnerable spirit.

It was a silent symphony, where the language of trust and gratitude flowed effortlessly through the whispers of your fingertips.

as you continued this tender ministration, a vibrant tapestry of emotions unfurled within the depths of your heart. gratitude, like a delicate fragrance, mingled with a sense of wonder, weaving a spellbinding combination.

the tenderness you shared painted a tableau, akin to a cherished memory, where hues of warmth, understanding, and appreciation blended harmoniously.

pleased by your touch, a contented hum escaped your companion's lips, his eyes finding solace in the comfortable embrace of closed lids.

a smile, brimming with emotions, blossomed upon his visage, a testament to the profound impact of your presence.

his heart fluttered with a bittersweet ache, caught between the beauty of the present and the uncertainty of the future.

yet, even in the face of daunting odds, a glimmer of hope persisted within him. it discreetly clung to his being, refusing to be extinguished.

it was undeniably a childlike hope, both fragile and resilient; to yearn for the possibility of a miraculous turn of events.

still, muichiro wanted to embrace that chance, to patiently wait for the magic of a future with you.

[masqueoferade]

Sooooo in preparation for whatever is going to come for LaD’s one-year anniversary event, I’m listening to all my unread Secret Times and Tender Moments stories for as many gems as I can gather. And oh my god, Continuous Symphony. This has probably been said before, but LOOK

Direct quoting from Abyssal Mark/Abyssal Blossom myths???

And also…

The details in this game, man. It’s absolutely obliterating me.

[mothiir]

Could I maybe get Fulgrim/Konrad/Ferrus with maybe spitroasting or double penetration?

cw: exactly what the ask says! some canon typical gore because it’s konrad.

—

—

Fulgrim grits his teeth, determined not to reward Konrad’s continued terrible manners with a scream. It would be one thing if the Night Haunter was deliberately trying to evoke a response, to create a symphony of gasps and sighs and cries — but no, he is acting on base instinct, with no thoughts to the aesthetics of his actions. His claws are buried into the meat of Fulgrim’s thighs, dragging down, flesh splitting and blood dripping down to his elbows.

He does not even have the decency to do it in anything resembling a rhythm — no, he gouges independently of Fulgrim and Ferrus’s well-timed thrusts, almost like he is deliberately trying to upset the balance. Fulgrim huffs impatience.

“Ferrus, darling — wait a moment.”

Ferrus pauses, his cock half-out of Konrad’s arse, holding the Night Haunter up by his bony hips; the other Primarch’s feet barely rest on the ground, such is the height difference. Konrad immediately objects to the cessation of movement, snarling around Fulgrim’s prick — and that, of course, means that Fulgrim has to withdraw from his (admittedly divine) throat to avoid an impromptu, uncalled-for circumcision.

“Konrad, no —“

“You stopped,” Konrad growls, showing his teeth, drool slopping down his chin. “You stopped, you bastard, don’t you dare stop — I did not tell you to stop — I will flay you —“

The threat is somewhat undermined by the whining cadence of Konrad’s voice, and the way he grabs at Fulgrim’s thighs once more, trying to hook Fulgrim’s cock back into his mouth with his oddly prehensile tongue. Fulgrim shivers all over at the sight, then comes to his senses, and grabs Konrad’s jaw. Ferrus tightens his grasp on Konrad’s hips, even as the Night Haunter tries his utmost to wriggle back onto Ferrus’ cock.

“I was so close,” Konrad says. “I was close, and you stopped, and —“

“Brother, dear, I do not object to a little blood during sex, but this is quite ridiculous,” Fulgrim says, gesturing to the mess Konrad has made of his thighs. Konrad, glowering all the way, unsticks his claws, wiping them clean on Fulgrim’s thighs without so much as a by your leave.

“If I wanted to have someone bitch over a little blood, I would fuck a mortal,” Konrad says.

“Well, if that’s how you feel — Ferrus my lovely, clearly we are not men enough for Konrad’s tastes, so we should leave him to seek out some poor lass to ejaculate into. Shall we adjourn?”

Fulgrim makes a point of stepping back; Ferrus, looking less than thrilled at the prospect of stopping, withdraws precisely one inch. Konrad immediately swipes at him; Ferrus catches his wrist with metal fingers, and squeezes until bones creak. Konrad’s moan of pain/pleasure could blister paint.

“No, that is — that is not what I meant. Keep going. I —“

There’s a malicious edge to Fulgrim’s smile as he cups Konrad’s chin, tipping it up. The Night Haunter’s black eyes are fevered. Rabid. Desperate.

“You’ll what, little brother?”

“I’ll —“

It is not the first time that Konrad has been forced into this position, and he hates this part just as much as he loves the rest.

“I’ll — I’ll be good,” he whispers, so softly that one has to strain to hear it. “I’ll be good, I promise — just. Keep going.”

“Well — you heard the lad!” Fulgrim purrs, grinning at Ferrus. The other Primarch’s expressions are challenging to read for the uninitiated, but Fulgrim recognises this one: a smug, satisfied grin. Ferrus bottoms out in one effortless thrust, and Konrad’s wail is amputated as Fulgrim reintroduces his cock to Konrad’s uvula. The Night Haunter moans and whimpers and slurps around his prick — and this time, as he grips Fulgrim’s thighs, urging him deeper, harder, faster — this time, his claws remain sheathed.

[eurydycee]

Winter’s Thorn: chapter II amidst chivalry and rivalry

⚘ cregan stark x tyrell!OC

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Synopsis: Caught in the political machinations of Westeros, Lady Euphemia Tyrell and her brother Adlyn, Lord Tyrell, Warden of the Reach navigate treacherous alliances to secure their house's future. Summoned to King's Landing, Adlyn strikes a desperate deal with Lord Cregan Stark, unknowingly sealing Euphemia's fate. As winter approaches, House Tyrell must balance duty, loyalty, and survival in a realm fraught with danger.

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format: series (ongoing) word count: ~ 3k warnings: hint of violence, not reread a/n: hello! this is my very first fanfiction...requests and criticism are always welcome if you want to be tagged comment!! I really hope you will enjoy it as much as I have (english is not even in my top 3 languages haha). omg I did not expect any interaction I'm truly grateful ( don't be shy to comment!)

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The sun had already reached its culmination, casting a quiet hot, golden glow over the tourney grounds. Vibrant banners fluttered in the breeze each bearing a colour and sigil to represent a house. The triumphant notes of the trumpets blared through the arena, signalling the beginning of the festivities. The crowd erupted in cheers, the excitement palpable as they anticipated the day's events. The clattering of armour and the clinking of weapons only added to the din, creating a symphony of sounds that spoke of celebration and impending competition.

Knights paraded before the stands, their armour shining brilliantly, reflecting the sunlight in dazzling displays. Horses, draped in rich, embroidered caparisons, pranced and snorted, their riders guiding them with expert hands. The knights saluted their lances to the gathered nobility, drawing more cheers and applause from the enthusiastic crowd.

Children darted between the stalls, their laughter and shouts of joy echoing as they played games and admired the brightly coloured ribbons and trinkets for sale. Merchants hawking their wares, voices competing to draw attention to their exotic goods and delicious treats. Jugglers and minstrels entertained onlookers with their skills, adding to the festive atmosphere.

Amidst the celebration, Adlyn sat in his designated seat, fiddling with his cufflinks. His nerves were a storm at sea.

The sounds of the fanfare continued to swell, the music and cheers blending into a harmonious celebration of the kingdom’s unity and the start of the festivities. Yet, Euphemia was nowhere to be found.

 "Where is my sister? The games will start any moment. It isn't like her to disappear just like that.” Adlyn whisper-shouted his emotions at bursting point

"Why don't I go look for her to ease your nerves, my lord?" his guard whispered reassuringly.

“Yes but make haste” Adlyn waved him off and went back to drowning himself in his worries

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"I present thee the gallant knight of the Northern lands, Ser Cregan!" snickered Lord Mormont pushing and pulling the armour of his Lord.

"Tell me, friend, why did you choose to participate in the one battle a Northman wouldn't partake in, even when promised gold?"

"Because if this lad wishes to be the underwing of my dear Coral, he’ll need to prove his wings to be steady--to me and her. Isn’t that right, future brother of mine?" interrupted Crayn, raising his lance and poking Cregan’s side affectionately.

Out of a sudden, a voice called out Crayn, and the knight found himself enveloped in a sudden, tight embrace.

“Sister, how you’ve grown! Last I saw you, you were what, five?”

“Eight,” Coral corrected with a playful grin. “And look at you now, a dashing knight!

Coral turned to the Lord's Hand, her confusion evident. “Oh my, will you be participating too? I didn’t know you could, you know not being knighted. “Indeed, I am no true knight,” he said, emphasising the word true while simultaneously gesturing his arms at her brother”, but the King insisted on my presence today.”

“Lady Euphemia,” interjected a guard gently, “you shouldn’t be here. Let’s return to your tribune. You’ll speak after the games.”

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Euphemia pouted but relented. She pulled out a delicate hairpin adorned with a small gemstone and handed it to her brother. After Adjusting a stray strand of hair that had escaped her intricate braids, she said, “Here, my blessing to you, good Ser.” With a final glance, she turned and made her way back to her seat.

Euphemia entered the tribune just as her brother began his speech, his voice resonating across the crowd, welcoming the attendees and toasting in the name of Their Majesties, the King and Queen.

-------

“Lords and Ladies, honored guests, and noble knights, today is a day of immense celebration and historical significance. I stand before you, filled with the pride and honor of our great kingdom, to mark this momentous occasion.

I recall vividly the day when we all emerged from our homes, hearts alight with hope, upon hearing the news that the usurper Aegon had been defeated, and our rightful King Aegon had ascended to the throne. That day signified not just the end of a tyrant’s reign, but the dawn of a new era--an era of justice, peace, and prosperity.

Today, we gather to welcome a new sovereign, a beacon of hope for our future. We stand on the precipice of a golden age, one free from the shackles of war, where our children and their children may know only the blessings of peace.

Let us raise our goblets high and toast to the health and glory of our magnificent King and gracious Queen. May their reign be long and prosperous, may their wisdom guide us, and may their hearts remain ever compassionate towards their people.

Seven blessings upon our King and Queen, seven blessings upon you all, dear friends. Let us celebrate this glorious day with joy, honor, and unwavering loyalty to our sovereigns and our realm. Together, we shall usher in a time of unparalleled peace and unity. Seven blessings to the realm!

Trumpets blared triumphantly after his last words, and knights began to enter the arena one by one. Euphemia's eyes scanned the field until she found her brother, sitting tall on a beautiful mare. His armour gleamed in the sunlight, and his lance stood tall and mighty. Beside him was Cregan for a man who always wore his ancestral fur cloak, suited the polished armour  him well, giving him an imposing and regal appearance,  thought Euphemia.

“First, we have Ser Gorrath from house Codd against Ser Rivan from house Clegane!” the announcer's voice echoed through the grounds.

The games began with fervour. Knights clashed, displaying their skills and courage. Men won, some got injured, and tragedy struck when a young boy from the Vale was killed, his life brutally cut short in his first tourney. Euphemia placed a hand on her stomach, hoping to calm the nausea rising within her. She watched in horror as the knight bound the boy's heels to his horse and paraded the lifeless body around the grounds for the crowd to see.

After the gruesome scene was cleared, the entrance of Cregan and her brother was announced. Cregan rode in with an air of calm authority on his horse, followed closely by her brother. Cregan marched forward towards the tribune, his gaze locking with Euphemia’s. Her thoughts swirled in a storm of emotions. Was he coming to ask for her favor, to thank them for the tourney, or was he looking at someone else? As he lifted his helmet, their eyes remained fixed on each other. A slow, confident smirk spread across his face as he spoke.

“May I have the honour of your favour, my lady? For only you can guide me to victory?”

His words cut through her swirling thoughts, creating a path where there had been none. Had he always been so eloquent, so cunning with his words? It wasn’t the request that flustered her, but the lips from which it came. In Highgarden, she had heard many sweet words, but none had affected her like this. She then decided to act for her tongue had been tied in knots. Leaning over the balcony with a poised intimacy, she tied her favor to his lance. Their eyes followed the fabric sliding down the weapon. He then pivoted his horse as she did, both turning away. She returned to her seat, her composure intact, though a hot flush ran down her body, coloring her cheeks with a mix of excitement and embarrassment.

“Hahaha, he knows how to ignite the flame for the fight,” Crayn exploded in laughter.l

“Huh?” Euphemia replied, snapping out her recent encounter.

“Asking for your favor before facing Crayn,” her brother explained. “Either he wants a true challenge or to at least take away part of his victory.”

As her brother's words drifted into her ears, a cocoon of silence enveloped her, shielding her from the chaos around her. She crossed her arms tightly over her chest, trying to protect herself from the embarrassment swelling inside. How could she have thought it meant something more? He was just trying to spite her brother. Foolish girl.

Her eyes wandered aimlessly, her mind vacant, until the crowd's gasp jolted her back to reality. Crayn had pushed Cregan off his horse, but before falling, Cregan managed to pull Crayn down with him. Euphemia and Adlyn sprang from their seats, rushing to the edge of the tribune to witness the unfolding battle on the ground. Her brother grabbed a spear, while Cregan armed himself with a massive hammer. Crayn, lighter on his feet and armed with his spear, seemed to have the advantage, deftly avoiding Cregan's heavy and slow strikes.

The two opponents charged at each other, their weapons clashing with a resounding crash. But the spear couldn't withstand the hammer's power and snapped in two, leaving Crayn with only a splintered shaft. Cregan seized the opportunity, swinging his hammer with brutal force, striking Crayn under the chin, and sending him flying backward into the arena wall.

The crowd's roar was deafening, a mix of cheers and gasps. Euphemia felt her heart seize in her chest as she watched her brother fall. Blood pounded in her ears, and she clutched the balcony rail, her knuckles white with tension. She sensed a hand reaching out from somewhere and grabbing hers. Adlyn did not look at her, his eyes were glued to the tourney, but his fingers were wrapped around her palm as he gave her a firm squeeze reminding her... Tourneys were not just a spectacle; they were a harsh reminder of the brutal reality of their world, where honour and chivalry could be overshadowed by violence and rivalry.

The scene had been cleared, and Cregan marched triumphantly, the cheers of the crowd still echoing in the air. New players were announced, and the tourney continued unabated, yet Euphemia’s mind was far from the festivities. Her thoughts were consumed by Crayn, his pained expression etched into her memory. Desperation clawed at her as she sought a way to reach him, to comfort and aid him.

“Get some time off,” her lady-in-waiting suggested softly, sensing her turmoil. Euphemia didn’t need to be told twice. Without a moment’s hesitation, she lifted her skirts and ran, heart pounding, to the chambers where her brother lay.

Bursting into the bedchamber, she was struck by the sight of Crayn. His once proud and confident form was now a mere shadow, slumped and defeated. The sight tore at her heart. Emerging from behind the door, the servants eyes widened in relief upon seeing her.

“My lady, you truly mustn’t be here. Come, let us return to the games. Your brother, if he were to--” a maester began, his voice tinged with concern.

“Leave us. All of you,” Euphemia commanded, her voice steely with determination.

The maesters and maids hurriedly collected their things, scurrying out of the room. Alone with her brother, Euphemia approached him gingerly, as if one wrong movement might shatter him completely.

“Brother,” she whispered, her voice breaking as she sank to her knees beside his bed. Her gaze fell upon the hairpin she had given him, now tucked into his belt. With trembling hands, she cradled it, her eyes closing as she devoted all her hopes and energy to her prayers. She prayed to the Father for justice, to the Mother for mercy, and to the Warrior for strength and courage.

Hours passed, and the pain in her knees grew unbearable, yet she remained, her resolve unwavering. Finally, she struggled to her feet, every movement a battle. She heard footsteps approaching the chamber--Cregan, holding a single winter rose.

“I see that you have won, but do not enter this chamber if you truly believe for one moment I wish to share your victory,” she spat, her voice dripping with disdain.

“How is he?” Cregan asked, his tone softer, almost hesitant.

“Why do you care? Weren’t you the one who caused him to be in this state?,” she retorted, fury blazin in her eyes.

“Like you assumed. I have won, and here I crown you Queen of beauty and love,” he said, ignoring her insults and extending a pink rose toward her.

“Very well,” she said, her voice laced with both defiance and hurt, as she jerked the rose out of his hand. Her fingers trembled slightly with the intensity of her emotions. "And now what? Am I to offer myself to you, to court you, to marry you?! I might have indulged the man who asked so sweetly for my favor, but not the one who knocked my brother into a sleep of death."

Euphemia stepped closer, her gaze unwavering as she locked eyes with Cregan. His breath caught in his throat, his heart pounding with anger, and a hint of undeniable attraction that he struggled to suppress. The air crackled with tension, charged with unspoken words and raw emotions.

Their faces were now mere inches apart, the warmth of their breaths mingling in the confined space between them. Euphemia could feel the heat of his presence, his eyes searching hers for forgiveness, for understanding, for absolution.

“My deepest apologies, my lady, but it was he--”

“Don’t you dare finish your words, my lord. You have done nothing but belittle and mock my family. If you are truly a man of honour, then go and swing your sword at our heads instead of playing this pathetic game of yours, for I refuse to partake in it.”

She stepped back, her expression one of cold fury. “Now, do me the honour and take your leave.”

Cregan hesitated, a strange look crossing his face. "Very well," he said, turning to leave. But as he reached the door, he paused. "If there is something you need you should know that I'll be always available for you, my lady," he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

---------------------------

For three days and nights, the world around Euphemia had seemed a dark and desolate place. She had sat by Crayn’s side, holding vigil in the dimly lit chamber as he lay unmoving, his breath shallow and his skin cool to the touch. Her prayers had become a whispered mantra, a desperate plea for mercy, her hope a fragile thread that threatened to snap at any moment.

The chamber was a place of shadows and whispers, the air thick with the scent of herbs and the faint flicker of candlelight casting long, wavering shadows on the walls. The maesters had done all they could, leaving Euphemia to her silent vigil, a constant, unwavering presence beside her brother.

But as the first light of dawn crept into the room, casting its gentle glow upon his still form, something stirred. The golden rays of the sun danced across Crayn’s face, highlighting the contours of his features and bringing a touch of warmth to his pallor. Euphemia’s heart skipped a beat, daring to hope for the first time in what felt like an eternity. She leaned in closer, scarcely breathing, her eyes fixed intently on any sign of life.

Then, like the softest whisper, his eyelids fluttered. It was a tiny, almost imperceptible movement, but to Euphemia, it was everything. Her breath caught in her throat, her hands trembling as she reached out to touch his hand, her fingers brushing against his cool skin.

“Crayn?” she whispered, her voice trembling with a mix of fear and longing. The sound of her voice seemed to penetrate the silence of the room, hanging in the air like a fragile thread of hope.

Slowly, impossibly, his eyes opened, revealing the familiar depths of his gaze. His eyes, once full of life and mischief, now held a weary awareness, as if he was emerging from a deep, dark abyss. Tears sprang to Euphemia’s eyes, blurring her vision as she saw the spark of recognition in his eyes.

“You’ve awakened. It has been three days. Thank the Seven,” Euphemia murmured, joy and gratitude flooding her heart as she gazed at her brother’s now-open eyes.

Crayn’s response was a low, pained groan. Hearing her mention the period of his absence brought a surge of frustration to his still-weary mind. “Allow me to apologize in advance for the words I am about to use, but that fucking barbarian cunt.”

“You are forgiven because I can’t help but agree with you,” Euphemia replied, a faint smile touching her lips despite the gravity of the situation. The relief of seeing him awake overshadowed any shock she might have felt at his harsh words.

Crayn’s face contorted with the effort of speaking, his voice a raspy whisper. “I--I did this bet with him. If he knocked me out for three days, he could have my blessing for the two of you .”

“U-us?” Euphemia stuttered, eyes widening in confusion. She had no idea a pact had been made, let alone that it involved her so directly.

Crayn realized at that moment that she was completely oblivious to the plans that had been made above her head. The weight of this knowledge settled heavily on his chest. He stared at her, seeing the innocence and confusion in her eyes, and took a deep breath, steeling himself to explain the situation. He had to set this right, for he was an honest man.

[cynicalrosebud]

RHI - NSFW: Control

NSFW Masterlist

Pairing(s): Soap x Rumor

Summary: Johnny teaches his sub a lesson in the meaning of ‘too much of a good thing’.

Warnings: Explicit sexual content, gay sex, BDSM dynamics (Master/sub), power dynamics, praise kink, slight degradation, gags, restraints, chastity, butt plugs, safe sane consensual, milking, overstimulation, slight cnc, aftercare

The dim light of the room cast long shadows over the two figures within, creating an atmosphere thick with anticipation. Rumor—Carwyn—lay on the bed, his wrists bound tightly behind his back with smooth leather straps, his jaw clenched around a ball gag that muffled his sounds. His body trembled with both frustration and desire as he knelt, his head lowered, legs spread wide, his cock trapped in a chastity cage that left him achingly hard but unable to find any relief.

Soap—John MacTavish—stood in front of him, arms crossed, his gaze fixed on Carwyn’s form with an intense, calculating focus. His presence loomed large, every inch of him radiating authority and control. The silence was punctuated only by Carwyn’s heavy breathing and the occasional creak of the bed as he shifted, trying and failing to ease the pressure building in his body.

"Look at you," Soap’s voice was low, almost a growl, sending a shiver down Carwyn’s spine. He stepped closer, his boots echoing ominously in the quiet room as he circled Carwyn, admiring the way his muscles tensed and flexed under the strain. "All tied up… completely at my mercy."

Carwyn let out a muffled whimper, his body jerking involuntarily as Soap’s hand slid down his spine, teasing, but never quite enough to give him what he so desperately craved. The chastity cage bit into his skin, a constant reminder of how close he was to the edge, and yet how impossibly far away.

"You've been pushin’ your luck, kitten," Soap continued, his tone stern as he crouched down to eye level, his hand slipping under Carwyn’s chin to tilt his face up. The leather gag kept his words at bay, but the look in his eyes said everything—defiance, frustration, and under all of it, the raw, burning need. "But tonight? You’re not gettin’ what you want, lad. Not until I say."

Carwyn’s breath hitched, his chest rising and falling rapidly as Soap’s thumb brushed over his gagged lips, teasing him with a softness that only made the situation more unbearable. His legs were already trembling, every fiber of his being screaming for some form of relief, but he knew there was no escape—not from this, not from Soap.

Soap stood again, and Carwyn watched as he retrieved a small remote from the bedside table, a wicked smirk tugging at his lips as he clicked the button. Instantly, the toy inside Carwyn—plugged deep and buzzing with relentless vibrations—sprang to life, sending jolts of pleasure through him. His body bucked, a desperate moan spilling from his throat, but the chastity cage kept him locked tight, unable to come no matter how hard his body begged for it.

"Ah, there it is," Soap murmured, his voice laced with amusement as he watched Carwyn writhe. "You look so fuckin' pretty like this, helpless and desperate." He clicked the button again, ramping up the intensity of the vibrator, watching as Carwyn’s back arched, his head tipping back as the overstimulation hit him like a wave.

Carwyn’s mind was spinning, overwhelmed by the sensations crashing through him. The vibrator pulsed inside him, filling him up and pushing him closer to the brink, while the cage kept him teetering on the edge of insanity. His muffled cries echoed in the room, a symphony of need and frustration that only seemed to spur Soap on.

"You wanted this, didn’t you?" Soap teased, running a hand over Carwyn’s quivering thigh, the touch light and mocking. "Always such a cheeky fucker, but now look at you. So easy to break down when I’ve got you like this."

Carwyn whimpered, his eyes fluttering shut as his body trembled uncontrollably. Every muscle in his body was tight, his mind foggy with pleasure and the painful denial of release. He tugged at the bindings on his wrists, but they held firm, just as Soap had promised they would.

"You want to come, don’t you?" Soap asked, his voice dropping to a near whisper as he leaned in, his lips brushing against the shell of Carwyn’s ear. "I can see it, feel it. You’re so close, princess. But you know the rules. Not until I say."

Carwyn moaned around the gag, nodding desperately, his body straining as the vibrations inside him intensified yet again. The overstimulation was too much—his entire being was focused on the unbearable pleasure and the denial of release, teetering on the edge of madness as Soap controlled every sensation.

Soap chuckled darkly, his hand slipping between Carwyn’s legs to cup his caged cock, applying just enough pressure to make him squirm. "Poor thing," he cooed, mocking sympathy in his tone. "I could let you come, could give you what you need… but where’s the fun in that?"

He clicked the remote again, the vibrations ramping up to a level that had Carwyn shaking, his body convulsing with the sheer intensity of it. The need to come was overwhelming, but the cage kept him locked tight, forcing him to ride out the pleasure with no release in sight.

Tears pricked at the corners of Carwyn’s eyes, the frustration and pleasure blending into a potent mix that had him trembling violently. He was so close, so fucking close, but Soap wasn’t ready to let him go just yet.

"That’s it," Soap murmured, his voice low and almost soothing as he ran a hand through Carwyn’s hair, tugging just enough to make him look up. "Take it. Let me hear those pretty sounds."

Carwyn let out a broken moan, his body twitching with every pulse of the vibrator, his mind completely lost to the overstimulation. He was nothing more than a mess of raw, desperate need, his entire world narrowed down to the feeling of Soap’s control, the tightness of the cage, and the relentless buzz inside him.

Finally, when Carwyn’s body was on the verge of collapse, Soap clicked the remote one last time, turning off the vibrator and leaving Carwyn gasping for breath, his body shaking uncontrollably. He was so close, so fucking close to the edge, but still denied the release he so desperately craved.

"Not tonight, kitten," Soap murmured, pressing a soft kiss to the side of Carwyn’s head, his tone both cruel and tender. "You’ll come when I decide. And not a moment before."

Carwyn slumped forward, exhausted, his mind spinning from the overwhelming sensations and the brutal denial. He knew Soap wouldn’t let him come tonight—knew this was the punishment he’d earned for being such a cocky bastard. But even in his haze of frustration and exhaustion, a part of him loved it—loved being completely at Soap’s mercy, loved the way Soap controlled his every breath, every moan.

The room was filled with a thick tension, the kind that lingered in the air, making every breath seem heavier. Soap stood over Carwyn, admiring the way the man trembled in his bonds, still kneeling, body quivering from the aftermath of being pushed to the brink and denied.

“Been patient enough, haven’t you, princess?” Soap’s voice was a low rumble, amusement and satisfaction dripping from every word. He stepped forward, hands reaching out to trail over Carwyn’s exposed chest, the pads of his fingers barely brushing against his skin, eliciting a full-body shiver from him.

Carwyn’s eyes flicked up, glazed over, lips still parted around the gag, his body screaming for release after the torment he’d endured. The chastity cage remained in place, a reminder of Soap’s control, of how close and yet how far he’d been from relief all this time.

With a smirk, Soap’s fingers found the lock on the cage, releasing it with a click. Slowly, agonizingly, he removed it, the cool air hitting Carwyn’s freed cock, making him groan low in his throat. The throbbing need was still there, pulsing through him with a vengeance, his length twitching, desperate to be touched.

Soap, ever the sadistic bastard, took his time. His hand wrapped around Carwyn’s cock, slowly stroking, teasing the sensitive flesh. “So hard for me,” he whispered, voice filled with dark approval. “Beggin’ to come, aren’t you?”

Carwyn let out a choked sound, a mix of frustration and need, his hips bucking involuntarily into Soap’s hand. His mind was foggy, his body reduced to pure instinct, chasing the pleasure that had been denied for far too long.

Soap’s hand tightened around him, picking up the pace, pumping Carwyn’s cock with just the right amount of pressure. “Not so cocky now, are ya?” he teased, his grip firm, twisting just enough to drive Carwyn wild. “You’ve been good… so you’ll get what you want. But I’ll decide how much.”

The promise in Soap’s voice made Carwyn’s head swim. He could feel the pleasure building fast, racing through his veins, overwhelming him after so long on the edge. His moans, muffled by the gag, grew louder, more desperate as Soap’s hand worked him faster, more expertly, knowing exactly how to push him right to the breaking point.

Just when Carwyn thought he couldn’t take it anymore, his body tensed, his release crashing over him like a tidal wave. He came hard, his cock pulsing in Soap’s hand, thick ropes of cum spilling out, coating Soap’s fingers. His body convulsed with the force of it, the orgasm so intense after being denied for so long that it left him gasping, his vision swimming.

But Soap wasn’t done. Not even close.

Before Carwyn could recover, Soap’s hand was back on him, stroking his oversensitive cock, dragging out every last bit of pleasure and pushing him into overstimulation. Carwyn’s moans turned into gasps, his body shaking as Soap’s relentless pace pushed him right back into the fire.

“Gonna give me another one, princess,” Soap growled, his hand never stopping, even as Carwyn’s hips jerked in a futile attempt to escape the intensity. “You’ve been so fuckin’ greedy… now you’ll give me everythin’.”

Carwyn could hardly think, his mind spinning from the overstimulation. His cock throbbed, still hard despite the orgasm he’d just had, the pleasure bordering on pain as Soap’s hand worked him over and over again. He couldn’t hold back the whimpers, couldn’t stop the way his body trembled under Soap’s touch, his muscles taut and straining.

Soap grinned, enjoying the sight of Carwyn breaking under him, his control slipping with every passing second. He leaned in close, his breath hot against Carwyn’s ear. “You’re mine, Carwyn,” he whispered, voice rough and commanding. “And you’ll come as many times as I fuckin’ want.”

With those words, Soap’s hand twisted just right, his thumb brushing over the tip of Carwyn’s cock, sending him spiraling into another orgasm. This one was just as powerful, if not more, tearing through him like a storm. His entire body went rigid, his cock pulsing as he came again, completely at Soap’s mercy.

And still, Soap didn’t stop.

He kept stroking, his hand unrelenting as Carwyn’s body twitched and shuddered, trapped in a cycle of overstimulation and pleasure that left him breathless, his mind fogged with nothing but Soap’s control. The pleasure was almost too much, his cock so sensitive it bordered on pain, but there was no escape. Not until Soap decided.

“Good lad,” Soap praised, his voice dark and satisfied as he watched Carwyn unravel in his hands. “You’ll keep goin’, won’t you? Until I say you’re done.”

Carwyn could only nod, his body completely spent, but Soap’s hand never slowed, drawing out every last bit of his strength. His vision blurred, his body trembling uncontrollably as Soap continued to push him, his cock still leaking, still throbbing, even as the overstimulation threatened to break him.

By the time Soap finally slowed his pace, Carwyn was barely able to hold himself up, his body shaking, his mind spinning. The gag muffled his soft whimpers, his entire being reduced to a quivering mess of overstimulated nerves and pleasure.

Soap leaned down, pressing a soft kiss to Carwyn’s forehead, his voice a low murmur. “That’s it, princess… all spent for me.”

He finally released Carwyn’s cock, letting him slump forward, completely spent. Soap’s hands moved to untie the leather straps around his wrists, the bindings coming loose, but Carwyn could barely move, his body too weak and overstimulated to do anything but collapse into Soap’s waiting arms.

Soap held him close, his strong arms cradling Carwyn’s trembling body, pressing soft kisses to the side of his neck as he murmured soothing words. “You did so well, kitten… so fuckin’ well.”

Carwyn, still dazed and exhausted, leaned into the warmth of Soap’s embrace, his heart racing as the last remnants of pleasure coursed through him. Despite everything, despite the brutal overstimulation, there was something grounding in Soap’s touch, something comforting in the way he held him after.

Soap smiled, holding Carwyn close, knowing full well that tonight, they had pushed boundaries, but in the best possible way.

[babyb1ues]

is lads the only otome u play rn? if not, what else do u play? how long have u been playing lads? do u whale or play casually? how many xavi cards have u collected? what's your favorite and least favorite five star? what's ur affinity progress so far? and do u ever get anxious about not owning every piece of his exclusive content?

(suddenly felt like asking u some questions, im so sorry if it's too much 😕) (the last question resonates with me a lot becauseee his writing team neverrr misses and it's almost impossible to skip. i did one time, the 'romantic afternoon' card, and i do not regret it surprisingly. i have his every 5 star except that one and heartstring symphony, but i fear i'll have to start making some sacrifices bc i really want to r2 lumiere once he gets a rerun some day. this game is really about to teach me some discipline lol)

don’t worry abt the length lol im happy to answer !

Not my first. I played mysmes like 6 years ago, some of the ikemen series, also paper games other’s game mr queen loves choice but I got stuck on a part and never continued. I used to play Tears of Themis back when it launched, for like 2 years consistently but then I got burnout and stopped. My feelings for ToT are way more positive than for lads tbh, I would play it again if I had the storage and didn’t get overwhelmed by how much I’ve missed.

Started with this one, again since launch, unfortunately. Funny story, I was in such a deep cloud strife obsession that when I saw xavier’s teaser I was like,, huh. Okay. The rest is history. I don’t whale but I’ve bough like, 5 monthly passes. I hate it. Never again, hopefully.

As for cards… I’ve got all of them but romantic afternoon and floral blessing. I didn’t care for the previous one so I skipped. My favorites depend on story vs replay value, I guess. One that checks both, uh, maybe 21 days. And No Restraint?

I’ve got like, a 91 I think. So far. Wonder if I’ll get to 100 by new years. We’ll see.

I was a f2p in ToT so fomo is kind of new to me. I don’t like the idea of spending money again and again and again so I try to save and grind as much as I can. When I pull for a banner I do it only if I find the card interesting. I’m picky because I’m stingy, so I don’t care about having a full set lol. I’ve spent as much money on a gacha game as I’ve spent on a FF game so that kind of puts things in perspective for me. And I don’t like it. So I’m trying not to buy a pass again unless something crazy happens idk.

[eilaafterhours]

Bonded M.List

Ko-Fi | Bluesky| LADS M.List | Main M.List

☆ Angst ☾ Hurt/Comfort ❀ Fluff ♡ Soft

Her feelings lingered, like the smell of char. His feelings never left, burned onto his soul. The proof of their love reflected in their eyes. Etched on their bodies. Blessed be thy name to overcome the destruction that is fated for them.

Continuous Symphony [♡]

Dreams as Bitter as Memories [☆ ☾]

[starmocha]

Long-Awaited Revelry ▪︎ Continuous Symphony

[hozierandco]

Callum Turner x Reader - The After-Match pt. 2 (SMUT)

A few seconds later, the referee whistled the end of the game, making cheerful and despondent people in the audience.

Cal, 10.56 pm: You better be home in 30 minutes or I'm starting the after-match without you

Y/N, 10.57 pm: I'll be there in no time!

A wave of cheers had engulfed the streets: Chelsea had won and it was only the beginning of a long night for the supporters that had assembled from all around, from Trafalgar Square to Greenwich, from Brixton to Hammersmith.

Horns beeping everywhere, pedestrians with beer in their hand and their voices broken.

"Are you joining us, Callum? We're going to the pub to celebrate!"

"Nah, tonight I'm celebrating with Y/N!"

Callum's friends all chuckled while looking at each other "You lucky bastard!", one snickered.

"We're not holding you back then!", another added.

"Have a great night, lads!", Callum said while getting his coat that had been discarded on the hat stand by the door.

"Yeah, you too!"

There was no time to lose. He could not take a cab since he had not booked any and going with his own two feet would take him nearly an hour. He knew that an hour would be way too long and that his body would not be able to cope.

From the moment he had read that Y/N had been cheeky enough not to wear any undergarments, he had felt a bulge flourishing. He had benefitted from the half-time to try and get rid of the tide that was boiling in his boxers, to no avail.

He then decided to take the tube, hoping in his innermost that the next train wouldn't last too long to arrive and that it wouldn't be too crowded. The Northern line usually was not at that time of the night but it was a game night so who knew...

He ran to the Angel train station as his phone indicated that the next train would be there in 10 minutes.

Cal, 11.09 pm: Shit, Y/N, you've got me running... The things I wouldn't do to fuck you...

Cal, 11.12 pm: U there?

But Y/N too was busy running. If the road from Regent's Park to Primrose Hill was a rather short one, she had taken too much time parting from her friends and was now late for Callum's plans.

Y/N, 11.14 pm: It's only your warm-up Cal'

Cal, 11.16 pm: From now on, it's "sir" for you!

Only a few seconds after reading the instruction, Y/N heard her phone writhe again.

Cal, 11.16 pm: If you're not here in ten minutes, I swear things will go very wrong for you!

It was all that Y/N needed to go back to her running although she was aroused at the idea that things could go "very wrong" according to her boyfriend.

She had one last street to walk by. She looked at her phone: 11.23 pm. Why are the London streets so long, she thought...

Finally the door to the Georgian hôtel particulier they shared with three other tenants. 11.25 pm.

She walked in only to notice that Callum was standing under the bare lightbulb in their living room.

"Congratulations for the game!"

"Yeah...", Callum said absent-mindedly. Y/N understood what Callum was doing: he was going through all the possibilities he had to take as much pleasure with her.

In love, Callum was the romantic type with a twist. It did not take him much to change from Dr. Jekyll to Mr. Hyde but he always valued Y/N's pleasure over his, always listening to the echoes of her lust. He was a passionate lover beyond the shadow of a doubt.

But that night, Chelsea had won and a deal is a deal.

Callum walked in a painfully slow pace towards Y/N with his large hands behind his back. When he was at her level, he stood in a parallel way behind her back and with one hand started descending on Y/N's dress. He had to check by himself.

Careful as not to touch her genitalia for the time being as he was not willing to surrender now, he grazed her hips and noticed that she had not lied.

"You really didn't wear no panties, huh?"

"I wouldn't lie to you, Cal"

Callum clucked his tongue and corrected her while putting his two hands on her shoulders "What did I say? It's "sir" for the misbehaving girls who wear slim dresses with nothing under them"

"I wouldn't lie to you, Sir"

Callum flipped Y/N around so that she was now facing him and ignited a symphony of kisses on her neck, her forehead and finally on her mouth. With each kiss, he went stronger too which Y/N replied by forcing her tongue to meet his.

Callum pulled her even closer and was ready to take her right there on the spot but he had another plans. With the contact of his beige chino trousers over her velvet dress, Y/N could spot the bulge that Callum had tried so hard to hide.

She might have looked a little too much for Callum had to intervene "Since you seem to like what you see, how about you get on your pretty knees and suck me off while you're at it"

"Yes, sir"

Y/N hoped that she would not be the cause for a pond on the floor as she had not anticipated that not wearing underwear could come with such consequences.

She executed herself and got on her knees. Right there, in the living room by the sole light emanating from the lightbulb and with the only sound of the supporters from afar.

She used Callum's legs as a support to get down and nodded at her boyfriend's "Are you okay with that?"

She was eager for the touch she had craved for almost ten days. When Callum had to leave abruptly earlier in the night, she had sensed it as a treason. Surely, he knew what he was doing, not giving her any attention for days and all of a sudden being all smitten.

He knew th ehold he had on her and knew the mess she would become if he started a fire only to let the sparks burning behind him.

Y/N then took Callum's trousers and boxers off in one brief moment, thus revealing the proud length that was finally being acknowledged and addressed.

Without further ado, Y/N stroked the thick column with her right hand, taking care of the two other inhabitants with her other one.

Callum could at last savour the fruit of his team's victory and his patience paying.

He was still standing tall on his two feet and came to the dramatic conclusion that he would soon need a pillar to rest on if he did not wish to fall. And would need one very soon as a matter of fact, considering the speed Y/N had gotten her hands used to. He chose Y/N's hair as a pillar and started running his hands in it.

All in her reactions appeared as though she would follow to the letter his commands. She had hungry plums in place of her eyes that manifested her lust to get more from the interaction. And her mouth was watering in expectation of the forbidden fruit that she would gladly receive. Slight moans slipped through her teeth, echoed by Callum's bestial growl.

Some foam oozed out of the head of his member, which seemed to be the signal Y/N had waited to get her mouth have a taste at it. She lapped up the drops of cum before getting more inside.

"All fucking night, I've been dreaming about this..."

"... And Chelsea winning too, I suppose?" Y/N retorted as she caught her breath back.

"Only close second to this", he assured with a moan on the corner of his lips and his hands directing her mouth to find its way back on where it was aching.

Callum's head tilted back as the petite mort was about to overflow and take him in its wake "Oh! Fuck, Y/N"

Once Callum's cock was empty of its ambrosia, Callum held a hand at Y/N to invite her to stand up and once she stood in front of him, he kissed her. In his kiss, he led the parade towards their bedroom.

"Anything else I can do for you, sir?" Y/N playfully inquired in a moment of respite that her lover had been generous to offer. In fact, he also needed it as he was still panting from the kissing and the blowjob.

"Ride me", Callum said in a deadpan tone.

"Anything you want, sir!"

Callum had only had the time to pick his boxers from the floor of the living room but had relinquished his trousers over there. He lay all of his tall body on the bed, taking off his shirt in the process.

Still standing by the end of the bed, Y/N got her knees on the extremity of it, moving on all fours heading straight and as soft as a panther to her boyfriend.

She straddled him, pushing her hair to one side of her face. As she could feel the bulge forming again under her pounding groin, she took off her dress, passing the piece of cloth over her head. In a second when she did not have eyes on Callum as the dress was right before her eyes, he fondled the two pomegranates that introduce themselves to him.

He had straightened up and was now in a right angle to the headboard. In a perfect position to let his lips wander right between the two breasts.

"Fuck! You just never stop being gorgeous, do you?"

Y/N rubbed her pelvis against the actor's boxers on the spot where his growing protrusion was.

"Good God, I hope you're enjoying yourself... Teasing me like that..."

Y/N continued pleasuring her cavity as she purred at Callum's words. To help her on her merry-go-round and because he was craving more, he held her by her hips, enabling circles of bliss. He felt as though he was a bull on a rodeo stand, enjoying the view and wandering on her stomach, breasts and neck.

If there was one thing Callum loved above all, it was to see Y/N being satisfied. In their sex life, it translated in him usually being aroused by the simple sight of her coming. He could come too if he saw just how great it was for her.

"You're so bloody hot!", he commented almost breathless "but I really need to feel how wet you've gotten for me"

Y/N removed just enough of his boxers to grasp the tip of his cock which she plunged into her in one swift movement and carried on riding her boyfriend"

Y/N came some minutes later, too glad that she was finally getting all the attention she deserved. When Callum joined her, he let go of Y/N as she seemed exhausting from so much riding. As she lay on the bed, he slid under the sheets, to the level of her waterfall, desperate to have a taste of both fluids.

It was Y/N's turn to pull Callum's hair to show him how she wanted to be pleasured which Callum blindly followed. Shutting his eyes, he could feel the drops filling his mouth.

His tongue found its way through the humid weather. Y/N had always loved her lover's meticulousness when it came to that subject. It was as though he was under a mysterious spell, completely in trance. He was devoted and took all his time to give her all that she deserved.

Y/N wiggled under his moving head, moaning louder and louder by every stroke his tongue was taking.

"Callum!", she cried in the night as the supporters had grown quieter.

This time around, Callum did not correct her as having her come with his Christian name on her lips was worth all the gold in the world.

[pinkteapotwriting]

hi!

I was wondering if you could write a smut with period sex with marauders? If you are not comfortable with that I totally understand and I’m sorry to make you feel bad :/

Marauders x fem!reader

Warning : Period sex, fingering, daddy usage, petnames

Word count : 1435

I hope you like it love *mwah*

---

It had been one of those weeks. You were feeling really low, and you took to isolating yourself. Politely declining to spend time with your loving boyfriends and taking some time for yourself. In other words isolating yourself completely. But now, now you were completely overwhelmed with the need for them. It was ridiculous honestly, and you weren’t sure why your emotions were all over the place. Now you had to swallow your pride and go apologize for being so distant with the men you loved.

Knocking on the door to their dormitory was much harder than it should have been, but you had to bury your shame and embarrassment to apologize. When the door opened you were met by a confused James. 

“Bunny? You know you don’t have to knock right? What’s wrong?”

You just stepped in and hugged his middle, instantly his arms were around you and rubbing your back in soothing circles. James cast his bewildered expression to Sirius and Remus but was met with a mere shrug. They didn’t know what was going on either. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

James separated from you and grasped your shoulders to stop you from falling into his chest again.

“Y/N, you’re scaring us. You’ve been distant all week and now you’re here crying and apologizing. What’s going on?”

Maybe you weren’t going about this in the right way. You grabbed his hand and led him to the bed. Remus had been resting against Sirius’s chest reading a book, but now the book was discarded and all eyes were on you as you sat cross legged at the foot of the bed.

Sirius intertwined his fingers across Remus’s stomach, resting on top of Remus’s hands as well.

“Tell us what’s happening love.”

“I’ve just been really sad this week and I don’t know why. I came to apologize for distancing myself and hoping you’d forgive me. I don’t even know what happened and I want to work harder at communicating instead of shying away.”

They all sighed in relief. Remus collapsed dramatically against Sirius, arms splayed out on either side of him.

“Jesus fuck, I thought you were going to break up with us.”

“No no no no no, I’m so sorry I made you think that. I love you all so much.”

James reached out with his arm and pulled you towards him, kissing the top of your head. The affection had you melting, and gravitating towards him without even realizing. You weren’t even aware of the process of crawling into his lap, and pulling him in for a kiss. But you were very aware of his large hands roaming your body. He smiled a cocky grin after pulling away, probably because your chest was heaving. He traced your lips with his forefinger. 

“Hey lads, how long has it been since Y/N has been touched, depending on if she followed our rules?” 

Sirius’s smile matched James now.

“Bout a week.”

“Oh poor thing.” Despite his words Remus didn’t sound that sympathetic. 

Their tones and unreadable expressions were making you much more aware of your desperation, of your need for them. You furrowed your eyebrows at the realization. 

“Oh bunny, don’t fret.” James' words did not have you any less worried. ”We can fix that for you, you’ve just got to do something for us first.”

It was ridiculous how fast they could turn you into puddy in their hands. James guided you off of his lap and moved up to whisper in Sirius’s ear, Sirius then whispered in Remus’s ear, which left you alone at the foot of the bed, emotionally and sexually frustrated.

Then suddenly they were side by side leaning against the headboard, staring at you expectantly. They were lined up in this order from left to right, James, Sirius and Remus. Sirius patted his thigh and beckoned you over with two fingers and you knew he meant business. So you crawled and straddled his thigh.

“What am I supposed to do?” Remus gave you your answer.

“Just move back and forth love.”

“Couldn’t we just-”

“No.” James' tone hardened.

You looked to Remus, but he just shook his head.

“Left us alone pup; we missed you. Now we just want to take our time.”

Sirius placed his hands on your waist and squeezed gently.

“Do you want me to help you bubs? Want Daddy to help you get off on his thigh?”

You were going to just nod, but the continuation of James stern facial expression made you know it was ideal to give a verbal answer.

“Yes please daddy.”

“Alright baby, just like this, remember?”

He led you back and forth against his thigh, catching your clothed clit at just the right angle. James grabbed hold of the hem of your shirt.

“Can I take this off, darling?”

“Please.”

James just stared at your chest in a trance, not realizing he was completely zoned out. 

“I think Prongs likes what he sees,” Sirius snickered. 

James elbowed Sirius in the ribs.

“Course I do, she’s beautiful.”

You whimpered.

“Pretty girl, you like being praised huh? Look at how wet it makes you, look at Sirius’s thigh. Oh.”

Oh? What was that about, now you were concerned. 

“What’s wrong Jamie?”

“Well-”

Remus held up a hand.

“Y/N, you know how I get kind of distant, emotional and irritable before a full moon?”

“Yeah? I don’t see what that has to do with- oh no!”

Sirius’s pants weren’t just stained with your arousal, oh no. Now you understood exactly why you had been feeling so low this week. Stupid fucking uterus. 

“Sirius oh my god I am so sorry!”

You tried to climb off of him, but his hands held firm.

“Don’t be sorry it’s okay.”

“Sirius let me go, I’ve gotta change.”

“Just a little longer please, you were so close and cumming will make you feel better.”

“O-okay.”

Remus quickly got up to grab a towel, and offered you his hand so you could freshen up in the bathroom. You came out wearing nothing now. James met you halfway and interlaced his fingers with yours.

“So pretty darling. C’mon lie back on the bed now.”

Sirius had changed his pants, and Remus sat against the headboard with a towel between his legs. It was intimidating spreading your legs for Sirius and James, but resting against Remus’s strong chest made it more bearable. Besides, once James had his fingers inside you, your embarrassment quickly subsided. Sirius was holding your hand now as James worked to pull an orgasm from you.

“That feel good pup? I’m sorry we didn’t keep a better track of things, but rest assured we’re gonna take such good care of you this week baby.”

You just nodded as pleasure took you to a different headspace, one where you could cast away all inhibitions in exchange for the three capable men who would make sure you were taken care of. 

Remus cupped your breasts; the feeling of his large hands brushing against your erect nipples only added to your bliss. And then, oh and then, Sirius rested his hand against your abdomen, situating himself perfectly so his thumb could lightly circle your clit.

The symphony of your moans were accompanied with the many praises of your adoring boys, anything to remove the possibility of embarrassment of the crimson towel below you. 

“So pretty love.”

“Fuck, being so good for us hmm?”

“You close love?”

They had missed you so much this week, and they really just wanted to make you feel good.

“I’m- I’m gonna.”

Sirius kissed the back of the hand he was holding while quickening his pace with the other.

“Come on love, we’ve got you. Let go for us.”

Any built up stress that was accumulated through that weak had suddenly dissolved. All you could do was sigh in relief when James and Sirius pulled their fingers from you, finally feeling at rest. God you loved them. But then James had a cheeky grin.

“You know Y/N, your cycle is basically lined up with Remus’s now. Does that mean Remus will be pmsing soon too?”

Remus’s hand collided with James' chest so quickly that it wasn’t the force of the impact that made James fall off the bed, but the shock of the speed. 

You could only giggle.

How did you manage to spend a week apart from them?

You’d try your best to avoid that in the future.

You watched Remus pull James in for a kiss by the collar of his shirt.

Yep, definitely wanted to avoid doing that again.

---

@sunny-bunnny @quindolyn @accioweaslcy @weasleyposts @bluemoonyblurbs @emmaev  @agalandhermarvelobsession

[mgg-81]

Retrouvailles [P.CY]

(CREDITS TO THE ORIGINAL OWNER OF THIS PHOTO: howfarms01 in Instagram)

A/N’s NOTE: Please correct me with the assumption that families and relatives are allowed to visit once in a while. This is just my assumption for this one-shot. I've just thought about Chanyeol so much in the military. Thank you so much again to @bookishcatto for proofreading!

Retrouvailles (French): This is the specific type of happiness you feel after seeing somebody for the first time after a long period of absence. --- (Millstein, S. (June 12, 2014). Relationship Words You Wish Existed In English. Retrieved from https://www.bustle.com/articles/26798-words-about-relationships-that-dont-exist-in-english-because-it-was-koi-no-yokan)

Genre: Fluff, Military!AU

Ratings and Warnings: None

Characters: Park Chanyeol X Female!Reader ft. Sehun

Word Count: 1,357

Date of Publication: 08-10-2021

“Noona?”

The voice made your senses break free from the whirlpool of emotions and unwavering mental picture of what was about to come. A swarm of people buzzing around here and there was almost a driving force for you to contemplate on whether visiting was an acceptable design or resulted in a hindrance. The swaying motion of the crowd felt like it was a messy symphony with someone invisible conducting how to move against your nature. If it weren’t for the grip of arms around you, the wave might consume you.

“Noona?”

The thumping of the ears almost covered the sound of the one calling you, but a firm squeeze against your shoulder brought you back to the ground. Twisting your head, a surprised expression was painted on your face at the young man whose eyebrows scrunched in a fashionably amusing way. Your look of bewilderment was now replaced with a hint of a laughing illustration. He aided you in making sure you were not hurt, continuing to wrap his arms around you.

“Sorry, Sehun-ie,” you muttered. “There’s a lot of people today.”

The lad nodded. “I know, but don’t worry, noona. We’ll find hyung.”

A faint chuckle escaped your lips. In a scene such as the one presented before them, one would be easily lost and entangled among limbs and legs. However, in your case, you need not have to have hardships in finding whom you sough to seek.

For he was a giraffe.

And to stand out he did.

“Hyung!” a booming shout came from Sehun as he raised his arms in the air and took to action upon seeing the taller man. You were half-dragged, half-pushed by Sehun like a tired-out train as he became your representative, handing out little apologies as the two of you were getting closer and closer.

It seems as if time had stopped for you, once you were now face-to-face with your sweetheart, whose ears adoringly slightly perked up and were dusted in pink at the sight of you. The two of you stood there, basking in the warmth and presence of one another as your hands slowly slid into his, with your fingers intertwining.

But before you could utter a word, you were dragged away, leaving Sehun in a jolt of surprise. The poor maknae had to begin to shove his shoulders again as he fought for his way amongst the crowd.

On the other hand, your hands were kept intact to Chanyeol as he whisked you away from the flock like a shadow that was almost unseen if it weren’t for his height.

“Wait!” you exclaimed. “Sehun!”

“We’ll meet him later, love,” Chanyeol turned his head and looked right back at you. “Let’s go somewhere less invasive.”

You didn’t press any further as the two of you half-ran, half-walked like two star-crossed lovers escaping. Their feet stroked against the ground, leaving trails of dust and smoke. Earlier, your thoughts of meeting him were simple but formal; the idea of walled offices and talking to him through a glass felt like it was instead a prison cell as compared to an actual military base.

This was far from what you had in mind.

You had almost drawn back in the sudden movement of Chanyeol running far and fast yet the more the sight of the crowd became like that of a colony of ants, the more you have felt relieved of the prospect. The wind tickled your neck and cheeks as if you felt it dance around your long crown of hair as if it was playing.

Running with him felt vigorous, alive, and joyful, feeling your power of wanting to leave whenever you wanted to. Running felt like escaping the buzzing life once in a while and freeing yourself to break into the open. More so, running felt like not going away from home, but towards him.

Your home. Him.

With heaving chests and ragged breaths, you felt the signal of Chanyeol’s gesture slow down as his legs were slightly parting away from the earlier spirited direction. You soon followed after, taking little halts like a car pausing and lurking forward until the two of you were finally put to a red light. Both your bodies, your hearts, and your soul weary as if the both of you had run a marathon. The lack of breath was felt amid sappiness and inaction.

You were ready to reprimand Chanyeol and maybe even knock heads with him. Even so, before you could hastily lift your head and sputter colorful words, he grabbed you by the waist as he tenderly cups your cheek like a baby while tilting his head to the side upon meeting and pressing his lips against yours.

Your eyes were wide open at the sudden contact but you couldn’t ignore the knot forming in your stomach as he pressed deeper, asking for entrance. You slightly opened your mouth and dutifully closed your eyes as the both of you tasted each other. It was rough at first like trying to win a battle but withdrew in a sensual one, intoxicating and flavorsome like candy, lying in the closeness and unity of one another. You felt your cheeks heat up at the determination of Chanyeol as your tongues toyed, and you couldn’t blame him for he was a man starved of your affections for a very long time.

And you were his canvas that he would like to paint all over and over again once his opportunity rises.

The two of you gently parted, asking for more air. You stared at his dark irises, sinking in the details of his face; he was now a man having to face the harsh realities of being conscripted, with streaks of the sun-kissed on his face from probably hours and hours of daylight training. He was a soldier signing as a protector and a fighter, realizing what he had to sacrifice in exchange.

A life for a nation, for his family, and his love.

You raised your hands, brushing your fingertips at his face, memorizing it like relishing a pen against paper, letting the words fall into place to make your love story possible. He encircled his own hands against yours, covering them and planting faint pecks upon them. Chanyeol looked at you with so much endearment that the two of you wished the day would not go down and make you leave in his arms.

But you suddenly remembered Sehun. Recalling how the two of you left him. You came to your senses and immediately broke free from his grasp and delivering a stinging hit to his arm, making him yelp and leap a few steps backward.

“Ow!” he exclaimed as he slightly glared at you, with the disbelief he had to receive this kind of treatment. “What?!”

“Asshole,” you gave him an unimpressed emotion. “Run? Really?”

“I just want…to get you alone,” Chanyeol foolishly grinned as he had one eyebrow raised. You snorted at his reference to Baekhyun's song.

“And leave the poor baby alone?” you rubbed the point where he took the smack in his arm, feeling a little bit guilty.

“Sehun is a big boy now,” he chuckled as he rounds his arms around you and gave a light kiss on your mouth. “You do well humor me, my love. For the agenda today, you must tell me of how life has been for you.”

You frowned at Chanyeol as if he'd grown another head. "But didn't I tell you already in my letters?"

“The letters will never be enough how much I want to hear from you. Those are only pieces of you, and I want to hold the very author of those printings and hear from her directly.”

A faint blush crept on your cheeks, to which Chanyeol made a booming laugh, the sound igniting your inner being like the way spring has bloomed into full color. He smooched your cheeks with affection and enveloped you in his arms.

"Fine, but you should do the same. Your letters may belong, but I presume you have more stories to tell."

“Always.”

“Whatever, Park.”

“Haha. Nado saranghae.”

[rumblelibrary]

The Diary of Doctor Laszlo Kreizler

Chapter 1

Synopsis: Alienist’s notes are private, sometimes gruesome, secrets of others and of himself.Those pages belongs to secrecy and decadence, have a glimpse to this world made of drafts, notes, accidents and reflections. Or maybe it is you the only person that should ever reach for it.

While you read this imagine Laszlo mostly at the end of his day, scraping the ideas and the thoughts, adjusting previous notes with additions, closing the day behind himself with a couple of sentences while sitting in his evening robe, a good glass of whiskey and his glasses bridged almost at the tip of his nose. Or maybe imagine yourself, you sneaky thing, reach for it from a far shelf.

Word count: 3k

Warnings: listen, this is the set of ideas and confessions of a man living in the 1890’s. Most of them will be outdated, rough, even deprecating in some analysis of the roles of men, women and social status, religion, etc.So be prepared, my point is to make Laszlo reflect upon those topics, but to be as faithful as I can to his time. Mention of death, mutilation, self harm and a minor depiction of a fight. Psychologically troubled young children ahead! Author’s note: I am a nerd for a good Victorian novel and a sexy Alienist.I have always been charmed by Laszlo’s mind and inner conflicts. So I took the chance and tried to have a run into that rollercoaster.  The story is placed between season 1 and season 2.

Diary belonging to Dr. Laszlo Kreizler.  This is a professional book of annotations over medical treatments of an alienist toward his patients. Do not disclose and send it back to the address if found: Kreizler’s Institute, xxxxxx, New York City (NY) L.K.

Samuel Griswold Goodrich, Illustrated Natural History of the Animal Kingdom (c1859). Contributed for digitization by University Library, University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign.

Schiller in his “Die Weltweisen” wrote: So long as philosophy keeps together the structure of the Universe so long does it maintain the world’s machinery by hunger and love. From the philosopher point of view sexual life takes a subordinate position in human’s life, from recent studies pushed by European philosophers, everything is about sexuality and its development. I like to think of the experience of being an alienist as the process of Queen Penelope that, while waiting for her husband Ulysses return, undoes her craftwork every night. I undo the fabulous constructs of people’s beliefs to go back to the rough sketch that stands at the beginning of their loss, their complex, their pain. Maybe that’s why working with children is so motivating and fascinating. They can be saved and yet, I am well aware, some of those sketches already traced in their young lives equal to scars that not even the most advanced theories could cure. But I can sooth them. I can prevent them the torment, the anguish, the recollection at night of those monsters. I feel like a poet would be a better alienist than a philosopher, but I have got no poetry nor philosophy in my veins, but the cold experience of the razor blade judgment of Life itself.

Today I observed a fight among the children at the Institute. Age range between 10 and 12. Boys. The fight was over the possession of a side of the playground, the territory of a pack  of youngsters formed under the name of Steven. Peculiar lad, coming from a military background finds comfort in replicating the schemes he lived in his family. He takes the role of the Father/Captain of the team and subjects children that come from a similar background story, but do not posses his same attitude to the command. All quiet on the front, until the space he declared is own spot got affected by the presence of others.  Intruders. I knowingly let the events unfold to see how Steven would react to his challenged authority. His reaction was, at first, worded, a sketch, a stage-play of an action he witnessed over and over, and he knew the part so well that some of the contending kids lowered their stance against him. Among considering to mildly intervene into this pyramid scheme of authority, another boy, Jan, calls himself on the role of the educator and hero of the masses and proceeds to unfold a wild and well assessed punch on the newly declared dictator face. Balance is established again. No need for me to arbitrate, once more the laws of nature seem to apply to children as in a state of nature.

Meet John Moore over lunch. His job at the newspaper is picking up, he is charmed by the spirits and the wits that he finds in his shared office with all the other writers. He mentions many, goes on and on over qualities and troubles, gossips and tendencies, and even little scandals here and there. To be aware of all those details gives me no interest, but to see a dear friend so invested clearly gives me something to pick up. To consider also the amount of details and the way he describes this or that member of the journal, I can do a small exercise of analysis. It is almost too easy because John is painfully genuine, even some of the kids at the institute would beat him hands down in a battle of lies. The more he likes somebody, the more he goes on about all the details and the characteristics, often letting aside the physical appearance. When he doesn’t like somebody he has a couple of adjectives for the wits and around four or five for the physical aspects that usually indulge on some repulsive idiosyncrasies.  John is a man that painfully fits in the storyline of The Picture of Dorian Gray: to him physical beauty is spiritual beauty and, of course, the other way around. This part of him surely intrigues me, makes me want to tease more from him. But, as a friend, it concerns me as John is way too prone to purposelessly decide that somebody with good eyes is also a good human being, which is a very romantic and admirably naive way of judging matters. I noticed some names that keep repeating in his narration. I dread that it is synonymous of a soon encounter from my side with the objects of his admiration. Fetiches, I dare to say, that I will have to annihilate before they sediment into his mind, perpetuating a narration that soon sees John being mislead by others.

Reserved: Tickets for the Eroica, Symphony n. 3 by Ludwig van Beethoven. Thursday evening.

Note on the show: the first movement lacked the pathos needed to begin with, I am not sure that the guest orchestra really managed to portray the wider emotional ground needed to withstand the whole representation. As the evening progressed there were some outstanding performances by the cellists. Still not approving the choice of reprising the early quick finale movement against the lengthy set of variations and fugue that we are used to in presence of the Eroica. Underwhelming the performance of the horn and oboe, vital in the comprehension of the genius of Beethoven. 

Niki is a new addition of the Institute, quite old for the standards. He is already 16, he will leave when summer ends to some expensive college his family meant him to stay. His parents expect me to make him “normal” in the time we are allowed together.  He is Austrian and I let him act it out like I don’t understand German for the first week of hist stay until today. I believe I hit his pride, which is good, in the moment I answered back to one of his sneaky comments. Now he knows. He is not safe from me, he doesn’t like it. The young man has a tendency to danger, risky tasks and edgy situations. In his mother’s own words “Niki is not afraid of anything”. The phrase didn’t raise any excitement in the father, rather some sort of painful acceptance that is role as the alpha male of the house is probably not only being challenged, but  already diminished, if not abolished. I have taken in consideration that Niki will break himself a bone or two in the process of the therapy, probably out of the spite of boredom or rebellion. It took him less than few days to turn himself into an outcast among the outcasts, which only drives me closer to analyse the complexity of his narcissistic wall of self defence. I gave him a physical challenge to lift a certain weight, he is a pretty skinny one, he didn’t like the challenge, but I am sure he will take it. He is a brainy guy, he hates to be questioned on unfamiliar ground. He won’t sleep at night thinking about it.  A challenge, in this first phase, can only bring me closer to the ease of his pains. To continue the observation.

It is a sad privilege of medicine, in particular the one I practice, to be able to witness the weaknesses of the human nature and the reverse side of life. Nevertheless, I oblige this same privilege of the study as life moves into shades of darkness. To be aware of it gives more solace to my soul than to be victim of patiently waiting for the inevitable unfolding of the events. To be able to understand more about psychology would bring more comfort and elevation to any human being, the times might not be there yet, but eventually something will move into the direction of a more wholesome approach.

Dinner meeting with Sara Howard, at the restaurant Jardin Des Cygnes, 7 pm sharp.  Do not expect to reach the dessert. Do not know if John will be participating due to undeniable tension among the two and the fatal despise of John over French cuisine.

The case that Sara unfolded tonight to my ears feels more and more like pulled out from some gothic book or from the mind of a Roman historian that needed to justify the godly origins of an Emperor. One killing, apparently random, a very constructed iconography over the body. Signs and insults, shapes and drawings. Is this a work of art? Does the killer wants his victim to be his Mona Lisa? His David? I am charmed and destabilised. If this was a murder like any other, then why to spend so much time into it? Based on the description the act of killing itself was quick: a sharp cut over the throat, almost like not wanting to ruin too much the surface to use as base for, what? I keep rerunning those symbols over and over as Sara described them to me, my mind is flooded with the designs of greek philosophers that needed to explain themselves why the sky is above our head and never collapses on us. Hilarious how, no matter the science advancement, in the mind of many the sky stands inevitably overt their shoulders, suffocates them, brings them to a death of the soul and not of the body. Is all this graphic charade indeed only a form to scream for attention?  To stress the eyes of an unaware viewer? It seems ridiculously elaborate, a scream for attention would be quick, it would be like guided by instinct, not reasoning, craftwork. Any man with a knife can paint in blood red the walls of a room and that’s asking for attention. That is the primal howl: look at me! I am here! But this one.  I don’t know yet.

Spent the early morning reading anew my copy of The Metamorphosis by Ovid. Didn’t touch it in a long time and I got bedazzled by the world of terrible sensuality, anger and selfishness of those gods and mortals. I think back at all the deviances and weaknesses of human kind and I try to relate it to all of those humanoid figures. Niki would be a minotaur, the lonesome son left in the labyrinth and his strive for success is his bull’s head. Or maybe a centaur, because of his wits and strategic thinking. I might keep up the process, maybe this is the way to understand my patients better, to understand the killer better. Must remember not to romanticise it. Greek gods were probably the first form of self indulging of a society that needed gods to be forgiving and allowing favours and punishments, but only in exchange of sacrifices. But the sacrifice never comes from the God’s will, but from the will of the man that perpetuates the act of killing. To sacrifice someone or something is the sadistic response to a lack of love deeply inherited in human mind that becomes neurotic. Is the killer giving the God of his own neurosis a body to feast upon? 

I talked with Jan this morning. The young boy is about 10, but he acts like a full grown adult. I could easily asses that’s the reason why he could challenge Steven in that fight. Two children mimicking adults situations they know too well. Jan is son of an industrial man, but he is also son of the dialectics of the industrial revolution. He sounds like he swallowed some of those books about working class rights and communism, probably pushed by a resentful surrounding (mother?uncle? the midwife?) over the social role of his father. As much as incredibly smart and lectured, Jan lost most of his early occasions in life by spending a considerable amount of time using his fists. The anger ever present in the young boy always surprises me, he seems to be holding a power, a strength of a full grown man in those tiny arms. Nevertheless, he is already the tallest of the group. He is surely an idealist, which makes him also tragically fragile. His strength mixed with his heart of gold can make him the best of the heroes or the worst of the villains. He apologised for the fight, he specified how he didn’t like the sound of Steven’s voice, more than the sound, the level of pitch.  I can’t stand somebody shouting orders, I just don’t listen anymore. He is so mature even about his own feelings, almost a gentleman in his chivalry toward the weaker children, honest with his open heart and resentful against any form of injustice.  I am not spared by his ways, he would come at me whenever he feels like I was being partial over some of the kids, his sense of justice blinds him and transform a perfectly balanced boy into a ranging animal.

Ordered book, to be delivered around tomorrow evening: Introduction à la méthode de Léonard de Vinci by Paul Valéry. Suddenly feeling myself as a gross ignorant in art themes. I always regarded myself aware of the artistic personalities and tendencies of present and past, but this new amount of perceptions over the human figure and the human body leads me to document myself more. I could ask John for advice, but he wouldn’t take things at matter that seriously. I can almost hear him say how I can make gruesome a pleasant topic such as art. I should probably wait to see the body to push any further aesthetic study, but I find myself not being able to stop. I reckon, I can allow myself a vice or two.

Today I saw the body of the killed man, courtesy of the Isaacson's. To be fair, I had underestimated it. In Sara’s descriptions, probably due to her more analytic mind, all the charm of the representation got lost in favour of a less cryptic and reasonable understanding of the act. Sara got what some alienists will call a masculine mind, which I don’t perfectly agree on. If I apply that same approach John would be a very feminine mind, all wrapped up in romanticising even the ugliest. I guess that dividing the world in “fragile and gentle” and “strong and powerful” is just easier to explain the fluctuation of something that doesn’t need a real name or a category like human inclinations on thoughts.  I got a feverish sense of patience by looking at the body. Each symbol traced with sapient slowness, dense of the time that the killer spent with the body. That is a work of hours, he had time and meaning. He had resources and was able to spend not less than the time he needed to reach, a vision? An ideal? A message? Is it the message meant to be understood? Am I supposed to unravel it or it is maybe just the way the killer communicates within himself? And if I do decifrate the code, will that bring me closer to him? Or to his next victim?

Reminder: ask John to replicate all the symbols on the bodies in the correct measure and order. It might be needed some hard convincing. Addition: scheduled meeting, his house, 3 pm.

It wasn’t a day like any other when I met you. Or maybe it was, and that’s why I got so struck by it and now I am here playing it over and over through what my memory clung on so desperately. In my own experience, life was often similar to swimming in a lake. Those rich, dense lakes in the north of (illegible cancelled word) were my father used to bring us during summer. I still feel the pull, the draw down toward the abyss. It ashamed me, in a way, the fear that such a simple feeling aroused in my young mind, unaware nevertheless, that such a feeling would follow me through all my existence. It was a prophecy and, like most of the prophecies, was a riddle. I cradle in my heart the charm of those days, the mindless happiness. The foolish feeling of freedom. Little I knew that freedom would be taken away from me that soon, that the body that used to navigate me over the dense waters, helping me to fight the haul toward the unknown, would become my own cage. That day. Today. The day where I met you, the day I was afloat.  The child gasping for air felt the wrench become a gentle push and now he is floating on his back over the scary waters of reality and malice. It gave me relief and it gave me terror, because since that very moment I knew that I would never be able to move on from the sight of you. From the feeling of your eyes lingering on me. From the smile you so easily shone upon me. From the whiff of imported perfume that hit me when you turned on side exploding that swan like neck. And nothing, not even my stern look, could dim that wave of hope that your sole presence washed over me. The abyss roars, calls me to a home of damnation and terror and curses my name and yet you repeated that hell-bound name of mine after me and I felt safe.

John told me so much about you, it feels like I have always known you.

The rope is gone from my neck, the guillotine won’t fall on me, I am spared, I am free.

I have read your latest article, I am thrilled to help with the case.

I am in disbelief.

Your voice.

Dr. Kreizler

How dare you? How dare you to come into my life, to appear, like a vision, mystical, in a way I despised at University when all those theology students talked about the divine. In this very moment I can’t recollect much of what you said, something about the case, about going with John at the obituary. It feels confusing, I feel overstimulated, my memory fails me, I am not sure anymore. I write these few lines and it is passed the hour of the witches and I wish, I demand, to never see you again, because life should never grant hope to a condemned man.