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gromvillage · 5 years ago

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all odd numbers. do it coward

jesus fucking christ i love you

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

probably one of my friends when we went to the mall the day before homecoming?? it was a while ago

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

i can’t wait to see my cousin again but i also have this one really cool uncle that i’d like to see again. actually i’d like to see a lot of my family cause they live far away but i don’t know when i’ll see them next

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

i never want to be drunk but i think they definitely would

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

i’d like to say yes because i’m a thirsty bitch but the answer is prolly no

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

negative ghostrider, my friends are tired of hearing me talk about me being thirsty

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

me yelling at my friends about how i want to be on bear grylls’ show, cause i think him and i would have a great time hanging out

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

oh hell yeah, my friends got acrylics a couple months ago and i was literally begging them to play with my hair and scratch my head

15. What good thing happened this summer?

lots of good things happened this summer! i went to scout camp, went to washington/canada with some friends, and went to europe for the first time!!

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

i’d like to think so! but also,,,,i think it’s probably not like little green dudes sadly, prolly just like microscopic shit that happens to be alive

19. Do you like bubble baths?

i haven’t taken a bath since i was really young, the idea of sitting in your own water is gross

21. What are you bad habits?

oh lots...picking the skin around my nails, i can be really lazy, not tidying up my room as often as i should which then makes me feel weird, the list can go on and on

23. Do you have trust issues?

oh you bet baby, i don’t really have reason to cause no one has done anything absolutely horrible to me (yet) but i am constantly questioning the intents of the people i’m close to

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

my face but also the fact i have no thighs and my arms are super scrawny

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

darker, i have such a hard time tanning and i’m high key pale

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

h a h a have to have been in a relationship to have has an ex

31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail?

yeah one tiny one on the top of my head

33. Spell your name with your chin.

paigved

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

ohhh tough...probably tv though cause i stay listening to music all the time

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

hi welcome to chili’s

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

rei or any outdoor store really, small independent stationary shops, target kinda slaps, really any little shop that’s along the main street of a smaller town

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

negative ghostrider

43. Do you smile at strangers?

not really, i’m super self conscious about my teeth and also think i look kinda creepy when i do it

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

the fact i have to go to school sadly but my goal is to one day get out of bed and be excited to do a job i love

47. Have you ever been high?

negative ghostrider, that kinda shit freaks me out

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

yeah there’s a couple things

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

all the time, i stay wishing i was an olympic skier or pro mountain athlete or literally anyone more interesting than me

53. Favourite makeup brand?

i don’t wear makeup!

55. Favourite blog?

@friendlydinosaur of course but also big fan of @perpetualpatchwork and a bunch of bon appetit blogs

57. Favourite food?

bread/pasta/sweets

59. First thing you ate this morning?

really lame breakfast sandwich thing on a piece of toast with cream cheese and lunch meat cause i’m lazy

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

no but i kinda wish, i have too much of a fear of authority/my parents

63. Ever been in love?

not yet

65. Are you hungry right now?

not super hungry but i could go for some ice cream

67. Facebook or Twitter?

twitter, i’m not a 40 year old lady jesus christ

69. Are you watching tv right now?

nope

71. Craving something? What?

someone to hold me but also really wanna go skiing or on an adventure in general

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

that’s gonna be a no

75. Favourite animal?

ohhh i stay being a closet horse girl but also think elk are pretty cool! also just generally love dogs

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

chocolate (but vanilla if it’s the really good shit)

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

maroon! i stay wearing this color all the time

81. Favourite tv show?

i still haven’t finished turn but i do like it a lot! also i just think i finished watching something on netflix but i can’t remember what?? but i feel like i liked it?? thinking is hard

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

never seen either sadly

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

see above

87. First person you talked to today?

my mom

89. Name a person you hate?

there are a couple but i’m not bouta drag em on tumblr

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

oh i could come up with a few people....

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

sadly only two pairs but i want more

95. Last movie you watched?

part of ratatouille with this girl that’s kinda like a little cousin to me

97. Favourite actor?

i don’t really have a favorite but i’m big on timothee chalamet at the moment

99. Have any pets?

a sickly beta fish i inherited from my brother when he moved

101. Do you type fast?

i’d like to think so

103. Can you spell well?

oh hell no

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

a couple, though none recently sadly

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

a few times!! again, closet horse girl

109. Is something irritating you right now?

the fact i’ve left some major work till the last minute, this one really painful pimple on my face, the way i stay wasting my time

111. Do you have trust issues?

this is a repeat from 23?? but the answer is still yes

113. What was your childhood nickname?

paigey, but a lot of people still use it! also foo foo the snoo was something my mom called me as kind of an inside joke rhyme thing

115. Do you play the Wii?

not anymore, though i was big on wii sports resort and the wipeout game when i was younger. oh also the lego harry potter, cause i liked to collect all the coins while my brother did the Actual Gaming for the levels

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

not really, the noodles are always super mushy and i just don’t really like the flavor

119. Favourite book?

i sadly haven’t been reading a ton lately and have forgotten literally every book i’ve ever read but i really enjoyed on jon krakauer’s eiger dreams that i read this summer

121. Are you mean?

sometimes, yeah

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

i kept a pair of white slip on vans pretty clean for a while! the trick is to use scotch guard

125. Do you believe in true love?

i haven’t thought about it a lot but i guess?

127. What makes you happy?

oh lots of things! nice weather, spending time outdoors, good food, time with good friends, ice cream, exploring, creating things

129. What your zodiac sign?

sagittarius (almost my birthday!!)

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

now that i think about it i don’t think i have a best guy friend?? but if i did i guess if i didn’t like them i’d try and be nice about it cause i’ve had a crush on close friends and know it sucks when they don’t feel the same way

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

“but if i get my shit together this year maybe i’ll be a ten” -10/10 by rex orange county

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

oh i’m sure i told some dumb lies when i was a kid but i can’t remember any right now

137. How tall are you?

barely 5′1″

139. Brunette or Blonde?

brunette

141. Night or Day?

depends on the mood

143. Are you a vegetarian?

i really should be for the earth but meat bruh

145. Tea or Coffee?

i don’t drink either!

147. Mars or Snickers?

snickers

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

not really but the other night i woke up to my waterbottle falling off my nightstand and that was some freaky shit

love you dude, i really needed this tonight

#grom village replies #if you have questions about even numbers #hit me up boys

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deadscottblog · 5 years ago

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Dear diary

Send me “Dear Diary” and I’ll share a single paragraph out of my muse’s diary for every one I receive.(you’ll love this)

July 8 four pm

So today I tricked this dumbass out of 16 dollars talk about a guy with no brains. at first he just barged over interrupting a moment of my personal alone time to ask, “HEY MR!. You look really cool and stuff can you teach me to be a man?”

I was going to tell him to buzz off but then I got an idea. I sold him my pubes.. this fucking. .dumb. . kid. bought my pubes. HAH . The best part he had a look of pure joy on his face yelling , “YAY! I’m gonna show my friends I’m a man thanks Scott you’re the coolest.. “ Then he rode off as his baby bike like a nerd.

Sure his comments were flattering but gaining 10 bucks was a sweet deal. At least it was until that brat came back bugging me to get it back. . Doesn’t he know there are no take backs its survival of the smartest and he’s dumber than the Dodo Bird .

July 8 11: 00 pm

Could have walked away with a loss of 10 but nope he kept coming back he was just asking for me to fuck with him and boy was it fun. . the look in his eyes as I burned that money after making him dance. . Pure ecasty

but I hope he leaves me alone now he was such a pain in the ass and I don’t care to see his fat ugly face again anytime soon.

July 9 4:00 PM

I get to see Radiohead tonight on a big projector I’m so excited. . I hope he doesn’t ruin it for me I dunno I think he’s up to something ..since he told me about it. .yes he is def up to something.. .

July 9 10:00 pm

Poor Porky Pig never learns that he is dealing with a genius! Recording his voice over Radiohead how desperate can you be? Luckily I kept hidden cameras to protect our house from perverts /robbers .. He won’t be bothering me again. . I think its over.

I sure hope so doesn’t this kid have a life outside of bothering me? I have a life I have homework hell I just want to play some video games tonight.

July 10 angry scribbles

FUCK! I hope this is the end I’m sick of that little shit wanting to sick a pony on me? How fucking pathetic can you get ? And since when can ponys eat wieners , i thought they were vegetarians. . I’m going to spend the night at a friends house I don’t think he knows where they life and I ‘m sick of him bothering me.. doesn’t he know he’s coming off like a deranged stalker?

July 11 8:00 am

I DID IT! I came up with the most amazing plan to take care of that ugly piggy once and for all . I put pubes.. in his chili.. from every kid in town (: he’ll probably get sick and die.. hopefully. Harsh sure but if he’s dead he won’t bother me anymore. I’m sick of this kid he needs to get a life a life outside of bothering me. If I had knowing how fucking annoying he was I would have just dumped him in a trash can and sent his ugly ass to Cuba. .

God I hope this ends. . He’ll finally learn to leave me alone and move on with his miserable existence… plus.. telling him he just ate all those pubes. .is going to be hilarious I’m going to be the most popular kid in town and all the single ladie are going to want a piece of Scott Tenorman.. ..

wonder where mom and dad are. . maybe a hotel they didn’t come home last night..

oh well doesn’t matter I guess.. with no parents I can throw a party to celebrate my victory tonight , can’t wait!

July 11th 5:00 pm

.. mother and father.. aren’t coming back..

with that pony… . fuck.. oh god.. .. what . what have I done!?

Sobbing

#scott tenorman #south park #fanfiction #journal entry #the EP in his POV #15th year #c137

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henry-hart · 7 years ago

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Mo’ Danger, Mo’ Problems s1 ep2

this one is long, just saying. lolol I just really loved it and had a lot to say :))))))

“OK HEN’S VOICE IS DIFFERENT IN THIS EP asjlksjk guess there was time btw this one and the pilot

he’s still incredibly adorable tho

“He’s gotta fix that elevator.” ...and then he never did lolol

OKAY so 13 yr old Henry found a way across town at almost 12 at night???? NO MY SON. THAT IS DANGEROUS (also does Swellview have a bus system??? did he walk??? I need to know.)

“’Put this watch on your wrist.’ Sure. What else would I put it on???” .....

hologram Ray pretending that Hen poked his eye out askjsl

“I’m gonna contact you on this watch now.” “What do I do with the old one?” “Toss it up in the air.” “.....Why?” “It’s about to self-destruct.” “Dahhh!” *tosses watch but it doesn’t do anything* “Hmm. That’s weird It’s supposed to--” BAM lololol

Do you think they chose Puerto Rico history for Hen’s test subject bc Jace is Puerto Rican??? I mean, it’s a lil specific to be coincidence (i hope they did)

“Ah, Puerto Rico. Land of....” “Puerto Ricans???” “Right.” alakjsklj

I FORGOT ABOUT THIS EP. THIS ONE IS SO FUNNY!!!! (I’m remembering what happens later in the ep lol)

antique bottle shop named “Glass from the Past” gotta love the witty names

“Let’s blow some bubbles and fight some crime.” so I see we aren’t into lame puns yet lolol

the “awwww my boot!” line is in this ep “Up the boot! Ow!” “HA!”

“Give me that pretty lavender bottle...because it matches my motorcycle helmet.” asjdlkj you can always count on hd bad guys to be goofy “You better bubble wrap that, chump! That ain’t no good to me busted.”

soooooo Ray walks in through the front door of the shop while Hen just....kind of.....walks in from...the side??? Like, Jace literally just entered from the side of the stage/set. wowowow lol

“Kid Danger.” “Yeah.” he looks so smug ajsklsjksjlk like, “that’s right. you know who i am.”

Ray telling the robber to try hitting him again lolol “Try to keep your arm straight.”

*robber hits him* “Strike three.” Hen pops in “That was only two...” “Okay, don’t correct me in front of the criminals.”

RAY YOU JUST THREW THE ROBBER INTO THAT MAN’S GLASS. WUT R U DOING???

“You really want to fight us?” looks at KD “Can I just fight the kid?” Hen’s all “???” lolol

“No you can’t just fight the--” “Sure he can! Come on, tough guy.” “Ok.” *puts his helmet over Hen’s head*

poor Hen is just spinning around

golf clubs in a store that sells glass. that’s gonna end well.

“KD! Catch this golf club!” *hits Hen in the head* aksjlsjsk

CM AND KD YOU ARE NOT HELPING!!!! YOU ARE BREAKING ALL THAT POOR MAN’S GLASS!!!!

“CM! Where are you?” “Follow the sound of my voice!” *a game of Marco/Polo w/ A LOT OF GLASS BREAKING ensues*

“Would you superheroes just leave!!!!” I feel for you, man.

Ray had to stop a wild, golf club swinging Henry lolol

“Where is he??? Did I get him???” he asks, standing amidst all the glass he broke while RAY got the bad guy

“Yeah, you got him.”

“My whole store is destroyed!” “No need to thank us.” “Thank you?” “You’re welcome.” Ray y r u lik dis

Hen’s hair is all wild from the helmet ajskjlskj

“Let’s go, KD.” “NO!!! Nobody leaves until you boys clean up all of this broken glass.”

MY POOR BB HAS TO BE UP AT 7 FOR SCHOOL. RAY YOU DID NOT NEED TO CALL HIM TO HELP YOU. YOU ENDED UP GETTING THE BAD GUY ALL BY YOURSELF. HENRY JUST BROKE MORE GLASS. LET MY SON GET HIS SLEEP!!!!

“This will only take us like....5 hrs. I’ll get u a broom!” *Hen just sinks to the floor* :(((((

Ms. Shapen just gave Hen a wet willy. aksjlksj The ever classy Sherona Shapen, ladies and gents.

CHARLOTTE IS SO TINY. EVEN THE KIDS IN THE BACK OF THE CLASS ARE SO TINY. THEY’RE. ALL. SO. TINY.

“This is what happens when you stay up all night on Twitflash and Twittlegram.” alksjskjls

poor Hen slept through his whole test (much like in my fic....hee hee)

J....y wud u want....a....wet willy???? (I love Ms. Shapen’s answering face alksjlskj)

Hen just drops back down on his desk. my son :((((

THE FIRST EVER TITLE SEQUENCE!!!!!! (last ep just had the title of the show. this one has the whole “It all just kind of happened” shebang)

“Now I protect the good citizens of Swellview.” Do you Ray? Do you?? (peep him charging ppl for that “protection” in a few years)

Hen just pouring an ENTIRE POT OF COFFEE into, as Char calls it, “a comedically large cup.” askdksjslk I fell you. I don’t drink coffee, but i. feel. you.

never get tired of these whack shows they watch on here. Natural surgery???? Surgery w/ no anesthesia??? what is that???? lolol

“You’re 13. You can’t be drinking this much coffee!!!!” “But I need it!”

concerned friends ftw

Jasp asking Hen about puberty......

“I haven’t had any dreams bc I’m not getting any sleep.” my bb...:(((

“I always have the same dream. It starts with me getting a horse for my bday. Then Jasp shows up. Then the horse kicks Jasp in the face.” “But I end up being okay, right?” “No.” her face kills me lolol

SIREN HART IS BACK ON MY SCREEN AGAIN. IT IS A BLESSED DAY.

“We’re home! Hen come help me please.” “HENRY, COME HELP YOUR MOTHER!!!” gotta love that s1 Piper

“What what what???” that’s exactly how I respond too hen alksjslkj

HEN MAKING DINNER. :’)))) I. MISS. THESE. DAYS. THE. HART. FAM. IS. MY. FAVE. AND. THEY’RE. NEVER. TOGETHER. ANYMORE. *cries*

how does one make chili balls????

“Make them spicy this time.” I love Piper so much gah

“Seriously? I’m like so busy. I don’t have time.” Ya’ll....the way he said this. he sounds so stressed.....my bb....I’m crying.

remember the days when Piper used to be anti-having Jasp in the house?? lolol I mean, she probs still is now, but she used to be a lot more vocal about it. “Aw man, Jasper’s here???” “Piper be nice.” “But Jasper’s always here. It’s NOT okay!!!”

“I’m going to the bathroom.” “Oh no, mom. Jasper’s going to use our bathroom.” ajskjslj

Piper telling on everyone as soon as her dad gets home akjslksj classic

their dad was a lot more....tolerable earlier on. I don’t mean he’s a bad character or anything. It’s just, he’s usually played for laughs now instead of being a parent. We get to see him actually parenting Hen in this ep, and it’s so nice.

“Jasper’s using our bathroom.” “Oh jeez.” Like father like daughter kajslkj (also looks like Hen got his phrase from his dad. cute!)

“and Henry said he’s not gonna make dinner.” “What??? It’s his night!” “I’M GONNA MAKE DINNER!” leave my son alone, Jake (he’s my son. not yours.)

YAS. JAKE SITTING DOWN WITH HENRY TO GIVE HIM A NICE PARENT TALK ABOUT MS. SHAPEN CALLING HIM ABOUT HENRY’S FAILED TEST. YAS. YAS. YAS. I LOVE ME SOME HEALTHY FAMILIAL CONTENT!!!!!

“She called you at work?!?.....Ah, that’s so rude of her. God.” alksjslk nice save hen

“Do you realize how important Puerto Rican history is???” aksjlkjs I really thing they’re doing this bc of Jace. Like, I really do.

Hen apologizing for letting his dad down :’))))

JAKE. HART. BEING. CONCERNED. FOR. HIS. SON. YASSSSS. He sees that maybe having a job is causing Hen’s grades to slip THIS is how you parent. (wish i had me a dad like that...)

you don’t get your 12 yr old daughter to drive u home from mouth surgery.....looking at you s4

“I can’t quit! My job’s a really big deal.” *puts hand on his dad’s leg* “It’s a junk shop. *moves Hen’s hand* You sweep the floors.” ajskjskjskl if only you knew

Hen’s like “I’m gonna go upstairs and study right now!” he takes off and his dad grabs him at the last second and makes him do this spin and akjsljs I just thought that was funny

“You study after you make the chili balls. And make them spicy this time.” He and Piper share this look lolol they’re so similar. it’s crazy

Hen yawning as he serves dinner :(((( he doesn’t even eat. he’s going without food AND sleep. MY SON NO!!!!

“I posted a pic, and now it has 45 comments. So now i have to comment on the comments!” “I’m about to comment on you.” asklkjskl (too tru tho Pipes)

RAYMOND. STOP FUSSING AT MY SON. HE IS TRYING HIS HARDEST. HE CAN ONLY DO SO MANY THINGS AT ONCE.

“Why aren’t you on your way over here???” “Because. I got in trouble for sleeping in class....and i had to make chili balls.” “Chili...balls?” “It was ‘my night’.” lolol I love the way Hen says that. so snarky

Hen stretching over his bed like “I’m just gonna....” slaps himself in the face to keep up “Maybe I can just....I’m just gonna lie down. 5 minutes tops. just 5 min” before he just passes out is SUCH a mood.

Okay, Ray coming in thru hen’s window all angry in covered in sewage is HILARIOUS

like, I love this little “I’m gonna kill him” angry dance thing he does aksjlkjs

oh my god he’s waving his smell in Hen’s direction asjksjsl

“Awww what’s that smell???” “I’m that smell!”

“Well, Ray, I guess I fell asleep.” “WeLl I gUeSs I fElL aSlEeP!!!” Ray u sound like scooby-doo aksjskj

“You know what’s down in the Swellview sewer???” “....poop.” “POOP!”

omg I forgot about Pipes being suspicious of the voices in Hen’s room

“Who are u talking to in here???” “Nobody.” “MOM!!!!!” “Aw jeez.” using his dad’s phrase :)))))

Hen blaming the smell on piper aksjlslkj

“It’s Piper.” “What???” “She hasn’t had a bath in a week.” “That’s a lie!”

“You disappointed me tonight.” “I’m disappointing everybody. People should just call me ‘Kid Disappointment’.” Hen....:((( (but the way he said the last part was really funny akjdlskj)

WHAAAATTT???? RAY WANTS HEN TO TALK TO HIM TO HELP FIGURE OUT A SOLUTIONG TO A PROBLEM???? YOU MEAN HE’S NOT BEING UNJUSTIFIABLY PARANOID OR RIDICULOUS??? HE’S NOT JUMPING TO CONCLUSIONS??? HE’S NOT BREAKING THE LAW OR HARMING OTHERS OR DOUBTING HENRY’S INTEGRITY????? WHAAAATTT????

^^^^^that was a jab at the Ray we’ve seen as of late

“Time. School. Working for you. My family. It’s just a lot to handle.” TOO TRUE HENRY. TOO. FREAKING. TRUE.

“I do know a guy who can get rid of your family.” Who, Ray. Who do you know?

Ray actually wanting to fix a problem rather than make it worse. Yes.

and so begins Ray’s crush on Siren. Nice try dude. My crush began the second she was on screen.

“Who’s this?” “My mom.” “Niiiiiiice. Is she still, uh, married to your dad, or--” “Yes.” “Does she ever seem lonely or--” “Go home, Ray.”

“The picture, Ray.”

aksjdklj I love that interchange.

also Hen just has this portrait of his mom in his room lolol what a momma’s boy :)))))

Jasp x Char covering for Hen even tho they have no idea what’s up ;’))))

GOOCH. MY MAN.

Henry does NOT have hepatitis Japser!!!! ajslkjslk

Gooch and Hen harmonizing those weird sounds omg lolol

“Oohloolooloooloooo--why am I doing this?!??!?!”

“Relax, kid.” “I can’t. I’ve got a huge makeup test tomorrow. I need to study, and you guys are making me go ‘oohloolooloo’“ “It’s ‘Oohloolooloo--” “I don’t care!!!!” I LOVE sassy Henry

all studying done in 30 seconds???? Where can i get me one of these???

“It’s a cerebral data transducer--or as we call it, the HRZ.” wtf???? lolol

“Why am i locked in a chair???” Hen asking the real questions.

the way Ray says “Puerrrrto RRRRRicoooo!”

“Will this hurt???” “Yes.” WHAT???” lolol

okay can you imagine the now jace being as extra as this jace??? No??? I didn’t think so. lololol

“Well?” “That hurt BAAAAD!!!”

“I don’t know anything about P--” *starts spitting out random PR facts* askjljsk “Wooooaaahhhh. I know Puerto Ricoooooo.”

the amount of times they’ve said Puerto Rico in this ep is crazy. I’m definitely convinced they did this for Jace alskjskl

“Do you think it’s cheating???” “Ehhhh.” “It’s a gray area.” GOOCH X RAY ARE MY FAVES. (i love Schwoz, but Ray x Gooch had some good chemistry.)

“I really doing this appreciate you for me.’ ASKLJDLKSJ I LOVE THIS PART OF THE EPISODE. THE SIDE EFFECTS ARE MY FAVORITE PART.

at first, i didn’t even register that he’d switched the order of the words. I was like, “Ok, I knew what he meant, but something about it made my brain feel weird???” lololol

I wonder if Jace had a hard time getting the mixed up order right akjsksl

I love the way Ray says “Uh oh.” with his eyes closed. Like, “I knew this might happen, but I was really hoping it wouldn’t.” lksjklsj

“Well you could’ve before that you told me!!!” THESE PARTS ARE MAKING ME LAUGH SO HARD.

Henry: *screams all high-pitched* aljsklsjls I’M CACKLING

I FORGOT HOW MUCH I LOVED THIS EPISODE!!!!!!!!

“So I’m gonna girl like a days for a few screams---wait.” LOLOLOLOL

*screams again*

“.......You guys wanna get lunch?” CLASSIC Ray. (can something be classic already in the first ep??? I guess the word is vintage. VINTAGE Ray.....but those r the same thing??? I don’t know ajksjlsk)

“The Vermont army finally surrendered and fled the coconut plantations.” “Coconuts in Vermont?” askjslkj school really be like that sometimes

Jasper just doodling the whole time. ME.

“Okay everyone. Get out.” Ms. Shapen is a constant mood. lolol

“100 my makeup test on I got!!!.....I mean, I got a hundred on my makeup test???” aksjlk I love u Hen

*randomly screams* “...” “.... That was inappropriate.” “I just got excited.”I CAN’T TELL YOU HOW MUCH THIS PART MAKES ME LAUGH ALKSJKLSJ

“I’m really proud of you, Henry. I’d give you a hug if it wouldn’t get me fired.” ajsksj

“Have a good weekend.” “Too you.” “....”

Henry said “Yeah, baby!” to Char. :))))) (I know it was just a quick thing on the fly, but it’s still cute)

“Where were you?” “I go to had somewhere.”

ya’ll. Henry’s mix ups are KILLING me.

“One more time???” “I. had. to. go. somewhere. Nailed it.”

*randomly screams again*

CHAR’S SCARED FACE. I’M DYING.

“You later see!” ALKSJKLJSK

I LAUGHED FOR THE ENTIRETY OF THE END OF THIS EPISODE.

I JUST REALLY LOVE THIS EPISODE. I FORGOT HOW MUCH I DID, AND IT WAS GREAT TO BE REMINDED.

this ep had it all

tired/overworked/stressed hen and his supportive friends and fam

then there’s that GOLDEN last two minutes with the side effects

just. wow.

props to Jace for doing an incredible job

he really delivered the goofiness. love my boy :))))))

rewatching these was such a good idea <3333

#this ep is def one of my faves #i was reminded how much i love it #hope this was enjoyable for you guys too #hd rewatch #mo' danger mo' problems

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the-mf-bread-babies · 4 years ago

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20/6/20

× REBUILD III ×

+ RUNAWAY RENEGADES +

[ COLLECTION I ]

“backstories”

∆ VOLUME TWO ∆

“Odd Beginnings”

· PART ONE ·

———————————————————

CHAPTER ONE

DINER DATE

It was a rainy night. The clock inside the diner probably hadn't been fixed in decades, which only made time pass more slower for Jason. Jason Aronowitz Watanabe, 16 years old, was waiting for his first date to arrive at the restaurant. His mother and father were sitting in front of him, eagerly awaiting for her too. Among all the excuses the two had speculated, the son had grown tired and realized that maybe he didn't want to do this in the first place.

Jason stared at the unmoving clock, the sound of rain pattering filling his ears. God, it would be such a good time to sleep right now. “Honey, she's probably stuck in traffic,” said Judy, his mother. She spent hours to do her hair, makeup, and outfit. This might have been her son's date, but her and her husband's was going to take place as soon as the girl had arrived, and it was ten times more grand than Jason's. They had a reservation at Chili's.

Hisashi Watanabe, Jason's father, kept his eyes focused on the road outside. Maybe this was her. No, then that one. Also no. Well, hopefully Jason's not getting pranked or whatever. Oh, that's a cool truck. Bye, cool truck. Damn, that reservation's probably busted by now. So long, paradise pie. Two hours to get here and both dates are probably cancelled by now. Jason looks sad. Actually, he always does, it's understandable, but this time's sadder than usual.

“Jason, look outside!” The father whispered excitedly, pointing out the window. “Whatever. I wanna go home.” Jason grumbled angrily, his voice slightly cracking either from crying or just puberty. “Sorry, just… a limo,” Hisashi uttered quietly. “We can order something if you want,” Judy suggested, awkwardly smiling, her big sunglasses shielding the intense mix of emotions she was feeling– anger, disappointment, sadness. Also, hunger.

“Mm,” Jason replied cryptically. “Waiter! Can I get a menu, please?” Judy yelled out, startling the two men. She ordered something, her voice being reduced to mumbles by Jason zoning out, eyes fixated on the table. “Sweetie, do you want a milkshake? They have cookies and cream,” His mother asked, gaining back his attention. “Um, okay, sure.” Jason answered, giving his mother and the waiter a polite smile. “Thank you.” He went back to zoning out.

His parents were having a conversation about something unimportant, and the restaurant was awfully ambient. There was a jukebox, but that, too, was broken. This seemed like an appropriate situation for the boy to get distracted from everything and daydream. Damn, it would be so cool if he could play the drums. Ah, to be a transformer. Imagine going to have a heart transplant surgery, and Gerard says, “Babe, it's okay,” and then when it's done you ask the nurse who gave you the heart and she replies, “Frank Iero,” and you and the other three remaining members go get pizza or whatever. Poor Frank. Was that a bell ringing. Oh, to be a lamb in a field, eating grass. Ew, imagine eating grass…

HELLO.

A shadowy figure towered over Jason threateningly, katakana surrounding her. Who the hell is this?

“Do you need money?” Judy asked quietly, counting some dollar bills, thinking this was some random person. “Yeah!” She shouted excitedly. “Gimme five hundred thousand dollars, stat!” Jason's face turned to the girl. Her shirt read “TACO,” with an image of a cartoon taco below it. Cloaking the ugly t-shirt was a blue jacket that seemed quite old and vintage. Well, at least her outfit is matching. “Um… are you…” he asked the girl.

“Your date for tonight, partner!” Oh, she has braces. Yeah, seemed like a braces person. “Awesome! Now you two don't do any funny business, okay?” Jason's dad stated, pointing. “Dad, what.” “Well, off to visit your mother!” He added, his arm around Judy, the two scooting out of the seat to make room for the girl. “Cool! Your dad knows TF2?” The girl said, her face sparking up in joy. “I was an animator for the shorts,” Hisashi revealed, much to the girl's excitement. “HOLY SHIT!!! CAN I GET AN AUTOGRAPH?!” She yelled out, turning the heads of some people in the diner. “Sure thing,” he answered, signing a napkin. “Okay, bye, you two,”

Jason's eyes met the girl's, realising he forgot what her name was. Um… well, her brother's a senior, right? Tony… Tony Blenderson… Bender… Flanders… Uh… “Hi! You're Jason, right? From History?” She asked, raising his fear more. How did he even agree to this in the first place? Oh, right, their moms are friends. “Um, yeah, and you're…” Oh God. Grave mistake. “Man, I don't know! Most people just call me by my last name. First names are boring, you get me?” She confessed, calming him down slightly. “Oh, uh… yeah! Uh, so I can call you…” “Anytime!” She added confidently. “Huh?” Jason said, confused. “Henderson, man! Hendersonville is actually an actual place, by the way! Could you BELIEVE IT?!” Jason awkwardly agreed, not knowing what to do. “Yeah… like Disneyland or something…”

The conversation went on, with the occasional text from Jason's parents. “So then I was all like, I know karate, you dumbass,” she started, Jason trying his best to understand what the hell she was talking about. “And this stupid little goat starts headbutting me, and I'm bleeding and stuff, obviously, keep in mind I had a hamburger, that's important, okay,” The boy nodded his head along. “So, yeah, that was how gender equality is. Yeah, zoos are dumb, they're bad,” “Yeah, like, it's not good for them and stuff,” Jason said, finally having some material for the conversation.

He paused for a bit, unsure if the other was going to add anything. “So, uh, what do you do? Like, um, in general, yeah,” he asked, sipping his milkshake. “Kill people.” She blurted. “Okay. I like collecting stamps.” He replied jokingly. “HAH! God, what a riot you are! Oh boy, STAMPS!!!” Henderson laughed exaggeratedly, thinking it sounded natural, and possibly cute. “Yeah…?” “Yeah, not real people, but like, I play video games a lot. You ever play Slime Rancher? I've got six thousand days on that guy.” She confessed seriously, crossing her arms. “Also, used to play Overwatch, but that was so last rebuild. Now, in this one, I prefer Garden Warfare. You know, the FPS Plants vs. Zombies game?” She casually added, Jason sending his usual confused nodding and raised eyebrows with a slightly opened mouth as a reply.

Jason thought for a bit. “I play Apex,” He said disappointedly. “Oh, didn't it end because of that big rapper guy? Marshmello? Yeah. Sorry, dude.” Henderson comforted. “Um. I guess?” Jason ate the Oreo on top of the milkshake. “Yeah, and I also listen to emo stuff. I was born in the wrong generation.” He said, stirring the drink. “Oh, like PSY? Yeah, my old neighbor listened to him.” .. huh. “Um… yeah, and like, MGR and stuff…” “Cool! What's that stand for, again? My cousin listens to Chaos! in the Gathering, Nuclear Lad, thirty three tailors, so I know emo.” Henderson bragged. “Oh, it stands for My Geological Rocks! It's because they're pretty rock, and one of them saw this book where the title was ‘Geological Rocks’ or whatever, so they named the band that.” He explained truthfully. “ Oh ! That's Dumb ! ” She blatantly said, her hand loosely swinging a spoon.

“Oh, shit, you don't have food. Um, do you want some?” Jason realized, offering Henderson the scraps of his milkshake. “Nope! Lactose intolerance, baby!” She confessed, a hint of sadness present in her face. “Oh. Sorry,” He said as he slurped up the remains quite loudly. “Should I ask them for a menu?” Jason asked, clearly not wanting to do so. “I ate a toasted toast sandwich earlier, so I'm not really hungry.” “A toasted toast sandwich is a piece of toast slotted between two other pieces of toasted bread. With butter spread on some of them.” Henderson explained in detail. “Is it good?” Jason asked fearfully. “Duh,” she said. “Oh, okay,”

The two sat in silence. The room was quiet, even the chattering of the other customers were gone. Henderson waited patiently for a waiter to come by, her face staring at the table. “That's a weird stain.” She uttered, poking hesitantly at it. “Probably tea.” Jason added, looking at the stain. “Yeah,” Henderson agreed, resting her head on the table. They stared at the stain for some time. “So, uh, you like Jar-Jar’s Odd Journey?” Henderson asked, looking up at the other. “No, I don't watch anime,” he replied, prying at the stain with his fingernail. “Oh, okay. But like, do you like Jar-Jar’s?” Jason paused, looking at her and squinting his eyes, thinking what she was meaning to hint, then slowly realising it. “Well, do you like Power Princesses? With the cat lady and the other lady?” He asked slyly, smiling from ear to ear. “Yeah… literally and…” Henderson inspected Jason's jeans. “metaphorically… you know…” Jason inspected hers too. They both cuffed them, even though Henderson's were already a good length, now a bit too short, resulting in a very prominent hint. “So yes, I do watch Jar-Jar, then,” he replied. They nodded, smiling in Mystery.

“So, why'd you even agree to this?” Jason asked, facing her. “I dunno. Felt rebellious to steal my sister's date, I guess.” Jason leaned back in his seat, blinking interestedly. “So, if it weren't for you meddling fool, I would've gone on a date with a CRSCO girl, huh?” “Sksksksks and I oop,” Jason questioned dramatically. “Yes. That's actually why I'm late; I drove here by myself.” Henderson confessed, smirking. “And I knew I wouldn't like this date if it was at some fancy restaurant, so I picked somewhere I could eat, hence why the location is so unsuitable.” “The distance, especially. That was so my family couldn't track me down.” “As if they'd care.” Henderson folded her hands together on the table and put her head down and stared at them, her hair swinging dramatically in front of her.

“Well that's bad. And bad… ass,” Jake stated, tilting his head awkwardly. “Like, your family, that's bad, like, your brother's a… he's not nice, necessarily, but you stealing a date from your sister and driving to some random-ass diner in the middle of nowhere, that's some Gone Girl shit.” he explained, eyes burning with awe.

“I mean, I've had some friends from band that met your sister, and from what I've heard, and I'm sorry for being nosy, but, I mean, it really justifies this whole… thing. So, uh, yeah. Sorry,” Jason continued as Henderson moved her Orbs to meet his.

“So, how'd it feel to set her room on fire? Were the firefighters and shit? Again, sorry for being nosy.” Jason asked casually, doing his first attempt at the three-paragraph thing. Henderson giggled uncontrollably, wiping tears off of her Orbs. “Wha– FIRE?! Who told you that? I only just threw some of her stuff out the window, but SETTING IT ON FIRE WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN, JASON!!” Jason sat up, stammering in response. “B-But, um, like, uh, Tristan, from band, the school band, said that– you, uh, like, it was midnight, and he woke up because of all the sirens, and– yeah.” Jason explained, his voice nervously loud, and his hands gesturing wildly. “Oh!” she yelled out, remembering the experience.

“That was the time I tried modifying the hell outta french fries and I set the kitchen on fire! Like, I was pouring the fries in, then the fire just shot up, like, ten feet, and my hair almost caught on fire, the smoke alarm was ringing, it was hell, man, hell,” Henderson explained excitedly. “So, yeah, someone called the fire station, next thing I know, I'm getting yelled at severely, and I can't play video games or go on my phone for three weeks!” Jason nodded in awe. “How did you… mod… fries?” He asked in confusion, rubbing his chin. “Oh, I put olive oil, safflower oil, cooking oil, and corn oil, also I used a flat frying pan, put in two brands of fries, made sure it wasn't overcrowded, also put a thick layer of seasoning on the pan and I folded it like scrambled eggs.”

“So yeah, a literal recipe for disaster. Never doing that again.” Henderson stated, although she was most definitely going to make the same mistake in a few years with Rachel. “Ah. I see. Why the flat frying pan?” Jason asked. “Oh, the other pans were in the sink and I was lazy.” She replied, making a disappointed face. “also i'm pretty sure that it caused the oil to like. yknow. vooooshhhhh” Henderson added, sinking her face into her hands.

Jason thought of a more embarrassing moment. “Wanna know that time I went to the ER because I was too goth?” “Wait, two times! One, I ate black lipstick, the other, I got choked by a…” Jason sunk his head down. “homemade e-boy necklace…” Henderson cackled loudly, slapping the table. “How the hell do you get choked by that?!” Jason pursed his lips sadly. “I was wearing the necklace first and put it on backwards, big mistake, it had a really heavy padlock, then my binder, which was way too tight, so it was choking me, but I was wearing my turtleneck, and my arms were stuck, so I just smacked the dresser violently.” “And that's how I came out to my parents.” Jason said, smirking and crossing his arms together. “Thankfully, they let me buy a better one that didn't, like, kill me.” He added.

Henderson's jaw was hanging open in surprise. “You're trans too?!” Jason pogged in response, “TOO?!” The two shared a very intense and complicated series of high-fives and fistbumps, screaming in joy. “Man, so this is why you stole that dumbass’ date!” “Solidarity!” Jason stated, smiling. “Thanks for saving me, uh…” He paused, waiting for a confirmation. “Uh… I dunno. Girl?” Henderson replied, shrugging. “Girl! I am Dude!” Jason shouted, giving her a thumbs-up. “Cool! Hi Dude!” She yelled out, earning a very strong high-five from Jason. “Hell Yeah !!!!!!!!”

“Man, you want something to celebrate? This shit's nice as hell.” Jason asked, visibly in a better mood than before. “To hell with it! Cheesy Frickin’ Fries for the lady!” Henderson shouted in joy. “And for the man?” Jason thought for a bit. “Truck” he uttered, giving her an emotional gaze. Get it? Gaze? “Ah, okay. Truck it is, then,” Henderson confirmed before raising her head to get the waiter's attention.

“Waiter ain't here. Should I? Go to the counter?” She asked, pointing to the front of the diner. Jason nodded in response. Henderson approached the counter, her hands in her pockets, her eyes looking around. There was not a single person to be seen, the pies sitting on the rack softly, asking to be stolen and devoured. “Be… do…” she whispered softly, her hand reaching to the pies, only to be stopped by the other one. Disappointed, she went back to Jason, frowning.

“God hates us.” She uttered, her head pointing up. “No one at the counter, no one near the entrance, so no friggin’ cheese fries.” She grumbled, “Drove five friggin’ hours in the friggin’ rain just for this dumbass shit. Can't even have the friggin’ pies, that's illegal,” Jason looked at her sadly. “Hey, it's okay, I brought snacks,” He pulled out a packet of chips from his hoodie pocket. “Here's the fries…” Jason placed a slightly melted cheese slice onto the table. “And here's the cheese!” “Hipster, innit? All deconstructed an’ stuff,” He said happily, swinging his arm a la Grunkle Stan.

“What a gentleman. Thank you, Jarnathan Jarstar, my brother,” Henderson said gratefully, unwrapping the cheese slice packet. “Good job, uh, Catra,” Jason commented, opening the chips packet. As they dined happily, a tall, scary figure approached them slowly and murderously.

“Ya can't bring outside food in here.”

“It's against the rules, kiddos.”

“Might getcha banned fer life if yer not careful enough.”

“Aah!!” Jason screamed quietly. The figure revealed itself under the illumination of the ceiling lights— a man, presumably middle-aged, dressed in a cheap chicken costume, donning a knight helmet. “You wouldn't make the cut. Ya just wouldn't.” The man uttered cryptically, confusing the two. Was this weirdo the mascot or just some guy? “I have pepper spray, creep.” Henderson threatened, pointing the self-defence tool at the costumed man. “Like that'll do anythin’.” He pointed out, glaring at the girl.

In response, Jason pushed the man, Henderson following suit by vigorously kicking the life out of him. Blood oozed out of the now-stained costume as he begged for help, trying his best to explain the current situation. “Stop! Please stop!” He yelled out, only for the helmet to be removed by Henderson, who was ready to punch the hell outta him.

Some balding white guy sporting bad facial hair had been the culprit all along. Jason pulled the remains of his hair and threw him to the floor, yelling. Out of the blue, a group of people showed up, coming to the rescue and pulling them apart from each other. “Whose idea was to be threatening again?!” The man in the chicken costume yelled out, clearly angry at all of them. “Run!” Henderson shouted, grabbing the snacks and dragging Jason out of the diner, only to be chased down by the others.

“Who the hell was that guy?!” Jason yelled, running. “I may be weird, but I definitely don't know that guy, and definitely not enough for him to just show up like that!” Henderson shouted back, confused. “Guess it's some weird kidnapper, then? Or a really odd mascot.” Jason said, dashing around the street corner. “Probably!” Henderson ran past Jason. “Hey, wait up! I was kicked outta the track team for a reason, Henderson!” The boy yelled, running out of breath. The girl went back to him, feeling a bit guilty.

“I, uh, have asthma.” Jason said, pulling out his inhaler. “Oh, um, I'm, uh, really, really, sorry.” Henderson nervously apologized, her mind wondering what would happen if Jason died right then and there. Oh, she'd definitely have to go to court. Maybe it'll be like Legally Blonde. Jason stood back up, gesturing to Henderson to keep going. “Hey, I'm okay, go ahead.” “You can leave me here if you want. Death isn't a big concern for me; I'll meet all the MGR members, then when I go to hell I can punch Brendon Urie in the face…” Jason struggled out. “… because he's like, racist,” “Bob Bryar too, man,” Henderson nodded slowly, not knowing what the hell kinda emo thing he was referencing.

Jason looked behind Henderson, surprised. “Hhhh… they're not killing us…” he tried out, pointing to her back. “Oh, hey, yeah. Let's go hide somewhere.” Henderson suggested, looking around for a good shelter. “I'm gonna tell this to my parents first…” Jason said, moving down to sit on the ground. “Oh, man. There's no reception here.” He revealed, getting more and more scared with every second they stayed there, the possibility of them being caught and killed or whatever growing steadily.

“I mean, we are in Ohio, Jason. There's a bigger chance of us stumbling into a big-ass cornfield than us getting reception in some super rural town like this.” Henderson sighed. “This place is called Van Wert, Jay. How friggin’ hillbilly is that? Van Wurrrtt, yee-haw,” She commented angrily. Jason took a deep breath and stood back up, scanning the horizon.

“Well, hard to find a place where we won't get shot immediately when entering, especially at this hour. I mean, gun store, bar, creepy pharmacy, another gun store, mom and pop, mom and pop's gun store, shooting range, farmer's market, café (with a rifle under the counter), barbershop, ranch–” Henderson smiled from ear to ear as she heard what Jason just said. “RANCH?! WITH HORSES?!”

tob e fucketh continue

a uhhh Notes by Rocco Wulfram North

oh that names so epic omg

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nehswritesstuffs · 7 years ago

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Literally anything from the Who's On First verse because I'm watching baseball and there's some weird stuff going on in this game tonight and I need me some baseball AU.

AWWW YEEEAAAAHHHH BASEBALL AU~

2008 words; takes place during the end of Who Came Out ofLeft Field?; the Who’s in Baseball? ‘verse is, for those new to the scene, is aMajor League Baseball manager/coach Whouffaldi AU taking place in the QuadCities, USA (on the banks of the Mississippi River) that originated pre-s8 andI am very careful with when writing so that a knowledge of baseball is notnecessary for the fic itself (though it helps)

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Clara Smith-Oswald was going bonkers.

It was the hormones, she kept telling herself. It was thehormones and the way the baby had shifted so that it was pressing right down onher cervix and how she could barely walk and ugh. She knew that if she was evergoing to put herself through this torture again, it would involve this partbeing in the dead of winter. Instead it was June, late June, and she wassitting in her office at the TARDIS a sweaty, cranky, emotional, aggravatedmess.

“This needs to be next week,” she griped. She was at thetable while her husband was putting together their lunch—hot dogs heavilyslathered in beanless chili, mustard, and chopped onions, along with heftyhelpings of peanuts and French fries on the side, courtesy of the bemusedkitchen staff—hands on her bloated stomach and a frown on her face.

“If this were next week, then you would be at the verybeginning of a month-long break from work that I highly doubt is going to keep youany more sane,” the Doctor said. He gave Clara a plate with chili dogs andfries, setting the bag of peanuts next to it. “I know you and you are at astage in your life where you need to work for yourself. Winter’s bad enough andhardly anything’s going on—taking time off in the middle of the season is goingto attempt to kill you.”

“I blame your unnaturally-potent sperm for getting at meduring what should have been myinfertile period,” she replied. She picked up one of the chili dogs and bitinto it—Heaven if there was one. “I’d say you’re getting a vasectomy after thisbaby, but that’s probably a bit too hasty.”

“Thank you for your consideration.” He laughed inwardly ashe sat down to eat his own lunch. As Clara had progressed through herpregnancy, she had grown rather snippy and irritable, which was something thatthe Doctor really could not bring himself to blame her for, or use it as areason to refer to her as anything other than ‘pregnant and therefore notherself’. He cracked open a peanut shell, discarding it on a plate while eatingthe nuts from inside.

They finished their lunch, where Clara had two more chilidogs and the conversation was everywhere from how they needed to set up theguestroom for her father to how she was ready to flat-out commit murder on thesection of the sports press that had been nosier than usual when it came to herand the baby. By the time the young lady from the kitchen staff came to fetchwhat remained on the cart, the Doctor was ready to kiss his wife goodbye forthe afternoon and promised that that evening they would do nothing but relax athome. No work, no stress, only some good food, a DVD, and snuggling in beduntil they fell asleep. She swore she’d hold him to it and gave him anaffectionate tap on the rear as he left her side.

Once down in the clubhouse, however, the Doctor switchedfully into manager mode. The series was tied and with the way that theGallifreyans had dropped their loss the night before (which was honestlyembarrassing due to how lopsided it was), they were going to need plenty ofriling before kicking things into full gear. Despite the flack it got him,there was an undeniable rush he and the team both experienced during hiscantankerous tirades meant to rile and pump up the players into a competitivefrenzy. He was very good at it, which he guessed was part of why the Quad CityGallifreyans were even slightly competent despite their second-year status.

The game that day was scheduled for the mid-afternoon, with warmer-than-averagetemperatures and humidity thicker than should be legal thanks to not only theriver, but a heavy rainstorm that had blown in during the wee hours of themorning leaving plenty of standing water throughout the area. It was alreadylooking as though it would be terrible for players and spectators alike, yetthat was something that the Doctor wasn’t very concerned about. Baseball hadbeen played in worse conditions, and would be before the season was over with,and complaining about the weather now would only be asking for trouble.

Anthem sung, ceremonial first pitch thrown by a localsolider home from her latest overseas tour, and away they went.

It was between the second and third innings when the Doctorfelt the cell phone in his back pocket vibrate—his personal number, as his worknumber was in his front pocket. He took the phone out and checked to see whowas calling; Clara.

“Yeah?”

“John, I’m havingcontractions, for real this time,” she said. He pinched the bridge of hisnose… shit.

“You’ve been having Braxton Hicks at least twice a week forthe past three months,” he replied dully. “The doctor said you’re doingperfectly fine and should make it to your due date when they induce.”

“My uterus, mycontractions, my labor!”

“Give it another inning and we’ll talk, okay? Got togo—we’re starting up.”

“James, I—” He hatedto do it, whether she used his real name or not, but he hung up on her, puttingthe phone back in his pocket. The fake contractions Clara had been experiencing(that her obstetrician assured was perfectly normal) had already prompted somany phone calls during games that he had long lost count. Soon she’d feelbetter, as it usually took half an hour of panicking before she called and tenminutes later he’d get a text that they’d stopped.

Now he just needed to get through the next two weeks untilshe was due to have induced labor and everything would be fine.

Except, much to the Doctor’s chagrin, while the Gallifreyanswere up to bat in the fourth, the batgirl that had been assigned to the dugouttapped him on the shoulder, worry on her face.

“Mr. Smith-Oswald? Mrs. Smith-Oswald is in the clubhouse andwants to talk to you. She said it was urgent.”

“What’s the matter?” he asked the teen. Two seconds and hecould see that she was extremely uncomfortable with the situation. “Judeska? Judy?What does she want me for?” She simply pointed towards the clubhouse entrance, silentlyshaking her head.

Groaning, the Doctor told Stalkingwolf to cover for him andfollowed the batgirl into the clubhouse. It was there he found Clara, sittingon the floor outside his office, holding her stomach with a pained expression thathad to of been the source of the teenager’s worry.

“Okay Clara, what’s wrong?” he asked, squatting down next toher. She was breathing heavily, beginning to sweat, and grabbed onto his upperarm like a vice.

“This is not Braxton Hicks,” she growled.

“Remember how we were taught to check at your last check-upbecause you have this so often?” he asked. She nodded. “Alright, I’m checking.”He reached down underneath the hem of her maxi skirt and felt around, growingpale once he reached between her legs. “Judy?”

“Yes, Mr. Smith-Oswald…?” the batgirl asked, having turnedher head away respectfully.

“Go find Martha, now;Mrs. Smith-Oswald isn’t having Braxton Hicks contractions.”

“What… what’s that mean…?”

“These contractions are real—get the doctor!” The batgirldashed from the office door and disappeared deep into the clubhouse, leavingthe couple alone. Clara whimpered as her stomach tightened in pain, whichallowed her to clench tighter on her husband’s upper arm. “Shit, and of all thetimes, too; why didn’t you just go to the hospital?”

“…because I needed to prove you wrong,” she replied, glaringat him.

“Putting yourself and the baby at-risk is grounds enough,apparently.”

“Don’t you chastise me!” By now, the batgirl had arrivedwith Martha Smith-Jones, the head of their medical department, who waspanicking in her own right.

“Did you call a cab to take her to the hospital?!” sheasked.

“You’re a doctor!”

“John, I specialize in kinesiology,not obstetrics!” Martha knelt down in front of Clara and checked for herself. “Damnit, a cab’s gonna have to wait. Alright, John, carry Clara. Judy? How good areyou with blood?”

“Not very, ma’am. If I don’t get back and help Ray in thedugout…”

“Ray is going to have to pull on his big-boy pants for thetime being; I won’t make you look at or handle much, but I will need your helpsince my assistants are on vacation right now.” Martha dug a cell phone fromher pocket and handed it to the teen. “First thing is calling a colleague Iknow who is at Genesis St. Luke’s today doing rounds.”

“We were going to go to Silvis,” the Doctor said as hepicked up his wife. The three then capable of walking began the rush towardsthe medical section of the clubhouse, where there would at least be a cushionedtable to place Clara on.

“Yes, and this baby doesn’t want to wait—of course any childthat is the result of the two of you shagging all night is an impatient littlepain.”

“I’m still here, ma’am—which number?”

“Judy, you’re fifteen and work in a men’s sporting leagueclubhouse, don’t give me that,” Martha frowned. “Just go to my favorites…”

Once Clara was on the cushioned examination table, thingsbegan to go incredibly quickly. Not even a half an hour had passed before therewas plenty of cursing from Clara, vomiting from Judeska at the sight of bloodand amniotic fluids, and a croaking, strained cry coming from the tiny newbornthat was placed on her mother’s chest, shaking and irritated and not at allpleased about her change in environment.

“Oh gosh, Clara, look at her,” the Doctor breathed. He wassplattered in things he didn’t really want to think about, his arms around hiswife’s shoulders as she held their towel-swaddled daughter. “Our little girl…so perfect…”

“She is, isn’t she?” she sniffled. Tears began to streamfrom Clara’s eyes as she took in the sight of their child, melting away all herirritation and frustration, replacing them with pure joy. The little family,huddled together in their own little world, until the peace was broken by thebatboy whom Judeska was supposed to be paired with running into the examinationroom, cursing loudly at the scene.

“Holy shit!” he cried out. “Coach! Stalkingwolf wanted me toget you, but… but…!” He was unable to continue, seeing his fellow teen stillbeing sick in the wastebasket while being tended to by Martha, while blood andother stuff was smeared everywhere, including all over the three adults, makinghis own stomach lurch.

“Hon, just go,” Clara sighed. She pecked the Doctor andpatted his leg. “Change your clothes and go back to the game. What inning isit, Ray?”

“…middle of the sixth…?”

“Then go along; Judy will let you know where Martha and I gowhen her friend gets here.”

“Are you sure?” he wondered.

“Go ahead—it’ll make a good story later.” She smiled alittle and chuckled, “and we can use it as a guilt trip.”

“I like it.”

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

At the beginning of the seventh inning, the Doctor returnedto the dugout, sporting a clean uniform and acting as though nothing hadhappened. While he kept the team together, pulling a comeback win out of them,Clara and Martha discreetly left the TARDIS through an employee entrance,bringing the baby with them to the local hospital to be checked over. It wasonly the following day, after the press was extremely confused as to why partsof the clubhouse were cordoned off during postgame, was there a press release distributedto the media about why the medicalwing had been off-limits.

Her name was Alba Jemma Smith-Oswald and it wasnot the last they would see of her.

#sparksearcher #Who's in Baseball?#Whouffaldi #Twelfth Doctor #Clara Oswald #Martha Jones #Alba Jemma Smith Oswald #MLB AU #baseball AU #Doctor Who #fan fiction #replies #Saturday Night Prompts #I imagine Clara's chili dogs as Detroit-style coneys #and of course she would crave all the ballpark food she could handle

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227snewfacebookfries · 7 years ago

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227's™ Facebook Fries!¡' (aka YouTube Chili' NBA) #Nike'Spicy'Tunes Trending News! #Nike'Spicy' NBA Mix! Elton Chili' John: I'm Still Chili' #Standing'liciously' Spicy': What you will and won't see on tonight's Spicy' special #Walmart'Spicy'Tunes #Nike

After the 60th annual Grammy Awards were held in New York City in January, CBS turned its attention to Elton John: I’m Still Standing Grammy Salute, a two-hour special it taped at Madison Square Garden that airs Tuesday night on the network. Artists like Miley Cyrus, Lady Gaga, SZA, Shawn Mendes, and Maren Morris paid tribute to the legend’s five-decade-long career by singing some of his greatest hits, while others created a few memorable moments that (sadly, or maybe not?) didn’t make the broadcast. Here’s what you should — and shouldn’t — expect to see in tonight’s special. What you will see: A whole bunch of artists singing beloved John tunes like “The Bitch Is Back” (Cyrus), “Candle in the Wind” (Ed Sheeran), “Daniel” (Sam Smith), and “I Guess That’s Why They Call It the Blues” (Alessia Cara). “The artists do get to choose what they want to sing,” says executive producer Ken Ehrlich. What you won’t see: John Legend not singing his original request, “Rocket Man.” Little Big Town got the honors, instead. “We went back and forth and I kept telling John that ‘Don’t Let the Sun Go Down on Me’ would be amazing for him,” explains Ehrlich. “Ultimately he listened. When he embraced doing it, I just knew it was going to be amazing.” It didn’t go off without a hitch, however, at the taping; there were some technical problems so Legend’s moment at the piano was delayed. https://www.yahoo.com/entertainment/elton-john-apos-m-still-140055190.html