#kind of difficult with a prosthesis i think??

[two-sheep-in-one-wolfs-clothing]

booooo why has no one drawn astrid in goalie gear BOOOOOO

[lollygaggingloser]

Did someone say more prosthetic limbed Hugo? No? I'm just hearing things? Awesome, here's more:

When Nuru joins the team, Hugo and her get on the wrong foot instantly. The trio break into the Koto castle during a ball to find the next trial, and Hugo tries to sweet talk his way around Nuru to find the trial's location. His fake charm is something she sees right through as a princess used to having people take advantage of her as a young royal. At some point, Hugo pivots his plan from getting info from Nuru to keeping Nuru distracted so Yong and Varian can sneak by into closed off areas. Nuru catches them slipping by and tries to warn the guards, but Hugo steps in her way to keep up the distraction. Upset, she pushes through Hugo who loses his balance and falls, either landing on his prosthetic arm or knee wrong and slightly damaging it. Nuru realizes that Hugo is disabled when this happens and unlike Varian or Yong, she treats him like some unfortunate victim, apologizing profusely to him for her behavior and asking if there's anything she can do to help him. While her reaction irks him, Hugo assures her he's fine and uses the situation to keep her attention for just a bit longer. What really pisses him off though is when she orders the guards to carry him to a chair where he can 'rest'. Being manhandled this way humiliates him, and he hates the looks of pity that other ball attendees give him. Eventually, Hugo manages to slip away to join Varian and Yong before all three are caught before they can enter the trial and Nuru questions their actions. While Varian convinces Nuru that they need to complete the trial for their journey to the eternal library, she decides to join the group, to which Hugo tries to persuade Varian and Yong to not let her tag along. Varian and Yong accept Nuru's help in the trial and Nuru spends her time not only helping with the trials puzzles, but offering Hugo help whenever the group has to go through rough terrain, offering to hold his hand or carry items for him. She thinks she's being genuinely kind to Hugo, but it's making him feel coddled, and he detests it.

At some point in the trial, Hugo and Nuru get separated from Varian and Yong through a trap door that they fall through when Nuru tries helping him. With Nuru's excessive pampering, Hugo rudely responds to her that he doesn't need her help and they wouldn't have fallen into the trap if she minded her own business. They argue, Nuru not understanding why Hugo is being difficult when she's just trying to help, and Hugo insisting he's not a charity case for some princess to get an ego boost from. After letting out pent up steam through their fight, the two notice symbols on the ceiling that display the constellations. To open up the pathway forward, all constellations from the Ursa Major family need to be touched, glowing a bright blue from human touch. Since the ceiling is rather high, Hugo instructs Nuru step onto his shoulders to reach the ceiling. Nuru doesn't want to, worried about Hugo’s prosthesis until the blond insults her, saying "Look, if you don't know which constellations to push, you can just tell me instead of pretending you're above stepping on others. Figures, I'm stuck with a saccharine halfwitted princess."

Out of spite, she goes along with Hugo's plan and stands on his shoulders to touch the constellations. At some point, she hears Hugo groan as he walks toward the next constellation, but before she can offer him a break from holding her up, Hugo goes "I thought princesses are supposed to be light. If part of me weren't metal, my bones wouldn't be able to carry your heaviness", making Nuru scoff at him and respond "Oh, can it! I don't need a talking step stool."

Eventually, all constellations are touched and the two rejoin Varian and Yong as a door opens. While Hugo and Nuru still don't like each other when they finish the trial, at that point, Nuru stops being so accommodating to Hugo and learns to interact with him without his disability coming into frame with their interactions. To her, he's no longer this poor angry person who's rough around the edges due to his handicap, but just a rude smartass that happens to have a prosthetic limb. They are not friends, far from it, but it's still a step up from where they began.

Part 1

Part 2

[abarbaricyalp]

Written for the @samsseptember prompt Amnesia // CW: Amnesia and all that goes along with it. I did it again guys. I wrote another heavy one. I swear the rest are better // Full Story on AO3

When the Light Gets Into Your Heart

When Sam finally convinced his eyes to open, everything was blurry and fuzzy and far too bright. His ears were fuzzy too. Like he was under water or had a pillow wrapped around his head. He'd woken up in hospitals a handful of times in his life. Once, after he'd been clocked in the face during a baseball game. They said he'd been conscious off and on beforehand, but he didn't remember any of that. Once, just a little while ago when he and Riley had first tried on the wings and Sam had promptly fallen out of the sky. And once when he was younger and had had to have surgery on his appendix, though that was hardly as exciting.

So what the hell had happened this time?

He tried to move his head, which felt like the most difficult task in the world, and a voice said, "Do you know you sleep with your eyes half open?"

Sam tried to blink away the fuzziness in his vision but only succeeded in smearing it more. "Being unconscious and being asleep are different things," he said. His throat hurt like hell. When he pawed at the edges of his bed, he didn't find a glass of water.

The unknown man in the room grunted and it sounded like an agreement. "That's true. I'd have noticed sooner if it was every time you slept."

It wasn't Riley's voice and Sam couldn't fathom who else would have seen him sleep. Sarah's new beau maybe? Still, Sam had a knee jerk reaction to say 'like you ever stay up later than me or wake up first,' though he didn't. That was the kind of thing he saved for Riley.

His body ached like he'd been asleep for ages or had just been in a fight, but he didn't feel like anything was broken-broken. The inside out bruise pressure of bleeding wasn't pronounced. He didn't feel like he was numbed out of any body part. Why was he in the hospital?

"What happened?" he finally asked. "Where's Riley?" Because if something had happened to him out had either happened to Riley too or he needed to be told about it.

His vision was finally starting to clear, though it just made his eyes burn and his head ache flare, and he could see the man at the end of the bed was a stranger. Sam had a knee jerk reaction that he was military. There was just something to the breadth of his body, the way he held himself, the tilt of his jaw. But his hair was long and where his arms were crossed over his impressive chest, he had a prosthesis. Sam blinked at it a little bit, willing his eyes to accept it. It was far more advanced than anything he'd ever seen the VA pay for.

The man's handsome, severe face was pinched in along the midline, eyebrows drawn in, nose scrunched, mouth puckered. "Riley?" he asked.

"Yeah, Riley. Don't play games. If you know who I am, you know who Riley is," Sam snapped. He tired to sit up. Failed. Made it seem like he was just shifting on the bed. "They're supposed to call him when I get hurt. Shit, I get called enough about him."

"I know who Riley is," the man assured tightly. He dropped his arms and then crossed them again without otherwise moving. "Where do you think you are?"

Sam rolled his eyes and sighed. He didn't really feel like he could keep enough air in his lungs to do that, but it was necessary. "I don't know. A hospital somewhere near base. I don't know how I got here. I don't know why I'm here. But Riley should be here to check me out at least."

"Sam," the man said. There was a pleading tone in his voice. The desperation made him seem much younger. "Do you know who I am?"

Sam tried to puzzle it out. He was pretty sure he'd remember an engineer or commander who was missing an arm. He was decidedly not Sarah's new beau. Was he supposed to remember someone from basics? Or, God, high school? "No, man. I've never seen you before."

The half-constipated look fell from the man's face, replaced by slack horror and dejection. “I’m going to go get your doctor,” he said and then disappeared before Sam could really fathom that he was leaving.

The room was like no hospital room Sam had ever seen. It felt more like a retirement home room or something. Outside the window, through a crack in the curtains where the AC kept letting them drift apart, he could see a sprawling campus of some kind. Sleek, modern metal and glass buildings in weird shapes dotted the landscape of rolling green hills. Everything was as clean and manicured as the room he was in.

Even with its beige walls and dark curtains, the room was too bright for his pounding head. Was he in the hospital with a concussion? That felt like as good a guess as any. But how would he have knocked his brains loose without Riley around to point and laugh afterwards? It wasn’t like him not to sit vigilant beside Sam’s bed when he was worried. Had he been hurt too? Is that why the stranger was being so cagey about where he was?

Without anyone else around to see him, Sam tried to sit up. His right wrist was lightly wrapped in bandages. It twinged when he put too much pressure on it, but it wasn’t anything he couldn’t work with. The rest of him seemed to be in one piece. He pulled the loose t-shirt he was wearing up and examined his ribs and belly for any signs of internal damage, but came up clear. There weren’t bandages around his head, despite how much it hurt. All of his teeth seemed to be in place.

What the hell was going on?

He was just yanking a pillow from under his ass when the stranger and another man walked through the door. If this was his doctor then Sam had fully fallen into a dream world. Firstly, he was weirdly handsome. Like an old 1920s painting come to life. Or a Magic The Gathering card. And his hair was so pointy for a doctor. Even the distinguished grey stripes at his temple didn’t make up for the electro-shock hair. And what kind of doctor–

“Why are you wearing a cape?” Sam asked.

“Hospitals get cold,” the man answered blandly without looking up from the notes in his hands. “I’m a surgeon, Barnes. Not a neurologist. I don’t know what you want me to assess.”

“I’m not concerned about the literal application of medicine here, Strange,” the stranger snapped. Barnes. A last name, Sam assumed. “You know what those things were capable of. Distorting time and shit. They did something to him.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Sam asked.

“It’s probably just a classic case of retrograde amnesia. He likely took damage to the temporal lobe. I am sure it will work itself out.”

“He didn’t get hit,” Barnes snapped. “I was on his six the whole time. He wasn’t injured.”

On his six? Why would this man be fighting with him instead of Riley? Where were they? What had the mission been?

He asked all of these things before Barnes and the doctor could escalate their own argument.

“Captain,” the doctor began.

Sam snorted. “Not a pilot.”

The doctor’s mouth curled just a little, eyes alighting for a split second. “Mr. Wilson,” he amended. “You seem to be suffering from a form of amnesia. It appears you have forgotten a substantial length of time. Now that you’re awake, we can begin to monitor–”

“How much time?” Sam interrupted.

“Well, I’m not sure neurologists would want to affect your own cognition by telling you–”

“Over a decade,” Barnes answered. His arms were crossed over his chest again. Tight. Like he was trying to hold himself in one piece. “A whole second life for you, actually.”

“What the hell does that mean?” Sam asked. Had he died before? Could amnesia catapult him back to before some other traumatic event, even if it meant going back a whole decade?

“I don’t know,” Barnes said. “But something happened and it wasn’t an injury.”

“What else could it be?” Sam asked.

“Barnes,” the doctor said lowly. A warning.

“Where the hell is Riley? Where am I?” he asked again. He could feel anger boiling below his skin. As if this wasn’t all confusing and terrifying enough, he couldn’t even get a straight answer about where he was and who these people were and where the hell his partner was. “Riley will know what happened. Where is he?”

Barnes turned away then, scrubbing his hands over his face and letting out a frustrated noise. The doctor kept his cool eyes on Sam. “You’re in Washington DC. Well, just north, actually. You’re on the Central Campus. You were part of a battle against an enemy I suppose you may not be able to believe right now. Can you tell me the last thing you remember?”

But Sam shook his head. “I’m not answering any questions until you tell me where Riley is.”

The doctor almost glanced to Barnes, but aborted the movement before his eyes got all the way off of Sam’s bed. “Mr. Wilson, it’s been over a decade,” he said. It wasn’t soft and comforting. Just a fact. “You are no longer in the Air Force. Riley Wiatrek is no longer your wingman. You have been working for SHIELD, and its iterations, for much of the time you’ve forgotten.”

Sam’s eyes narrowed. “There is no way Riley and I would leave each other. Or the Force. He’s the last thing I remember. I need to talk to him.”

“Riley died,” Barnes said without turning around. Still, the words were like an arrow aimed right at Sam’s heart, landing true, and ripping out the back of his ribcage.

“You’re lying,” he said and hated how quiet his voice had gotten. “You’re lying to keep me away from him.”

“Barnes,” the doctor repeated warningly.

Barnes turned then. He looked almost as distraught as Sam felt, though there was a hard foundation to his expression where Sam had no foundation at all and was currently free falling through several stages of grief at once. “Your way isn’t working,” he snapped at the doctor. “He deserves to know. It’s his damn life.” Then he turned those steely, wet eyes on Sam. “He died before I met you. During a night mission. It grounded the EXO-Falcon program and you were living here, in DC, when you met Steve Rogers.”

“What?” Sam asked. He felt entirely hollowed out. Barnes’ words were entering his ears and then banging around in his skull without sticking to anything. There was an all-consuming terror and grief that was snaking around every muscle and nerve and fiber and bone in his body, constricting him inwards until he was sure he was going to crumble into nothing.

“Then you met me. I was worse then. You saved the world. You trained to become an Avenger. You kept looking for me. Eventually, you found me, though it was more complicated than that. You became a wanted fugitive for breaking a UN declaration about superheroes. You were on the run for a few years. We saved the world again, after different kinds of complications. You and I eventually reconnected, stopped a terroristic threat, moved in together, and have been running the Central Campus since. Oh, and you became Captain America.”

“What the fuck is happening?” Sam breathed. “Is this a joke? Are you pranking me? What the fuck is happening?!”

“Sam, I swear to God, I’m not lying to you. You’re a superhero. You were best friends with Steve Rogers for years. You stole the wings back and were a hero called the Falcon. You’re Captain America now. Steve gave you the shield. We’ve been training new heroes. Saving the day over and over again. We were just fighting these things that distort time. I think they fucked with your head.”

The doctor was looking at Barnes with a wildly unimpressed look on his face. “Though said completely without tact, Sergeant Barnes is correct. I would like to help you, though,” he added quickly. “I think I can find a spell to reverse the effects of the time distortion.”

“It’s not distortion,” Barnes snapped. “They stole it from him.”

And then, all of a sudden, the doctor’s expression almost seemed to soften, like a realization dawning over him. Whatever it was, he didn’t vocalize it. “I will need to examine you more thoroughly to assess the full extent of the damage,” he told Sam. “And then I can begin to create a solution.”

“How can you possibly find a solution for this? This is insane. You are both insane. Let me out. I want to go home.” He tried to swing his legs free from the bed, but his head swam so heavily he almost pitched backwards. Barnes was there faster than anyone should be able to move. His hands were like hot coals through Sam’s shirt as he held Sam steady.

“You were affected by magic,” the doctor said. “I happen to know my fair share of it too. I do think returning home may be beneficial. If familiar surroundings should jog your memory, it may go a long way to breaking the spell.”

This wasn’t a fairytale. Spells and magic and lost memories, lost loves. This was impossible. He didn’t want any of this.

“Sergeant Barnes, I assume you will be alright with Mr. Wilson at home?” the doctor said.

“Could use a lift,” Barnes answered drily. His arms were still around Sam, rubbing at his ribs mindlessly. Sam shrugged them off.

The doctor ticked his head to the side and then flicked his wrist. A tear in the world opened up right in the middle of the hospital room. Sam leapt to his feet and Barnes stayed right beside him to hold him up. Which was good because Sam’s knees were clacking together with exertion and disbelief.

“What the hell?” he asked, staring at the room in the middle of the room. It was somewhere in Louisiana. Sam would know that in his bones. The color of the sky outside the windows, the way the paint on the railing peeled, the swaying grasses and mosses. He could practically smell the salt air. It was home.

“Magic,” Barnes said. “Come on. Help me through.”

Somehow, Sam found himself walking towards the glowing circle and then stepping through. Well, lurching through maybe, like all the distance that should’ve been between them and home was whipping by him all at once. And suddenly he was home.

It wasn’t the Wilson house, but it couldn’t have been very far from it. Without thinking, Sam stepped away from Barnes and stumbled to the window. He wrenched it open and let the early fall air breeze into the house. He took his first deep breath of the afternoon.

“How long has it been?” he asked as the sea air calmed him down.

“If you think you’re still in the Air Force? At least fourteen years.”

“And Riley’s really dead?”

“I would never lie to you about that,” Barnes said with a sharp, protective edge to his voice. “If I could bring him back to you, I would.”

Sam nodded like a bobblehead. He kind of forgot he was doing it eventually. “And who are you?”

Continue on AO3

[dottoreparadox]

Theory: How did Dottore make his Segments?

To start off this blog, let's get right into one of my favorite living Harbingers.

That's right, it’s essay time, baby. Let’s fathom out how Dottore made his segments.

(Tl;dr included at the end if you only care about the conclusion and not how I reached it and what evidence I have for it because this shit gets looong. Over 3k words long, in fact.)

What we know about Dottore’s segments:

They were created by Dottore. Yes, that seems like a very obvious statement to make, but I do need to establish that these are not things he found but rather an invention of his own making. We’ll get into it later.

We have seen them referred to with the terms “segments” and “prostheses” in canon (also as “surplus” but that’s just Dottore being Dottore). A segment is defined as: “each of the parts into which something is or may be divided” while a prosthesis is: “an artificial body part, such as a leg, a heart, or a breast implant.”

I would like to make a note here that they are not referred to as “clones” despite the widespread usage of this term in reference to them by the fandom. I’ve certainly done it myself. It's important to note that they are not clones. Clones would imply that these are genetic copies of the original and/or organic in nature. This is not the case (I’ll get into the not organic argument in a bit). If they were mere clones, they would be their own person. Instead, these are “the eyes” that Dottore “placed in the dimension of time.”

They ARE Dottore. Not copies of him. Think of them more like time travelers in some kind of stable paradox rather than clones.

Also, they likely share a mind space in some capacity or other based on the overlapping dialogue we saw when Dottore erased his segments and the implications held in this statement:

“What did you see when you were imprisoned [by the Akasha]? You were observing me, and that's how you know I've long grown tired of their doubts and endless arguments. ”

The Omega build was able to speak to and listen to the other segments while he was in Sumeru and they were not present (having just sent the one segment that was helping him back to Snezhnaya).

(I would like to take a second here to clarify that while the many segments may have shared a mindscape of some sort, they were not a hivemind as we’ve previously seen in Genshin. A hivemind, as we saw it in Alhaitham’s story quest and as it is often used in science-fiction, is when multiple individuals all share a single “mind.” The segments all had their own minds. They could not have all been constantly arguing with each other if that was not the case. (Remember how the hivemind made by Siraj fell apart.) So they shared a mindscape where all their minds could touch, while keeping their own mental boundaries.)

Anyways, the shared mindscape is another important bit of evidence in proving they are not mere clones and are instead multiple versions of the same person. (Well... maybe. It could also be taken as evidence that they're all robots running using a single, remote central processor; but I don't have any evidence for this besides the likely shared mindscape; so I won't be exploring that theory further.)

Okay, now that I’ve quibbled excessively over the terminology around Dottore and his segments and brought up a bunch of interesting but kind of irrelevant points, let’s get into the actual purpose of this analysis and theory: how did Dottore make his segments?

The only direct statement we have to go on for answering this question is this line of dialogue:

“Segments are extraordinarily difficult to make. They require extremely rare resources and enormous amounts of time and effort.”

The time and effort seem like they go without saying for any kind of creation at the level of complexity as an entire functioning human being. So we won’t be going into a deep analysis of this part. Instead, let’s focus in on these “rare resources” and what they might be.

To start off, we need to establish what kind of work Dottore does. After all, if his specialty was in organic life, he would likely have made clones rather than what the segments are.

Let’s start with the one hundred percent confirmed work he has done rather than the speculated accomplishments. We have definitely seen Dottore work with:

Ruin Machines (the ruin guard factory we visited in Childe’s story quest, Zandik's legacy note series if that does end up being him)

God remains (Dottore invented Delusions and, at least in Inazuma, the Delusions were made using the Tatarigami energy left behind after Orobashi was killed. He also released the Tatarigami energy in the first place during the Tatarasuna incident. In the manga, he used god remains to suppress Collei’s Eleazar.)

Robots (Krupp in the manga, Scaramouche’s mecha body in game)

The Akasha (I’m not entirely sure how to define this one. God power? Cognition? Software? Maybe all of the above. But he could use it so well that he could edit people’s minds and trap Nahida’s consciousness in the Sanctuary of Suresthana, so let's put it on the list)

Human enhancement (based on the wise doctor’s pinion from the pale flame artifact set and just about every soldier we’ve seen from Snezhnaya. I’ve seen lots of comments along the lines of: “what are they putting in the water over in Snezhnaya to make everyone giant?” Yeah, the answer is Dottore. He’s doing weird shit to people again.)

Human cognition (this one kind of falls under the enhancement section above, but I felt his work with things like manipulating minds and dreams was its own category, see the second event in the Apple Island Archipelago. I can't remember if it was directly stated that Dottore made that machine... but it almost definitely was him.)

And more! (I’m sure we’ll learn about new and more exciting atrocities he’s committed as the game continues. Also I probably forgot something, oops.)

Out of all of that, the best basis for building a body would be his interest in machinery. This assumption is backed up by what we are told in the Pale Flame artifact set:

“"A human is nothing more than a machine of a certain level of complexity." Thus declared the youth from his lectern in the seedbed of wisdom. If one were to disassemble a part of this machine and make enhancements to it, Its performance could be greatly amplified. With or without a Vision, and irrespective of their physique or combat skills, "Enhanced humans" would surely display strength far beyond the average.”

Now, if we also pull on some evidence that is most likely to have been done by Dottore (even if it hasn’t been confirmed that it was him), then we can put stronger emphasis on his interest in Ruin Machines. Dottore is almost definitely Zandik from the Zandik's Legacy series of notes. Zandik was fascinated by the Khaenri’ahn machinery to the point that he was reprimanded for his interest in such dangerous technology. He was ultimately denied permission to bring parts of the Ruin Golems (or other Khaenri'ahn machinery, it's unclear) back to the Akademiya and instead had to help seal them up. (His interest could explain the Fatui’s later knowledge on how to reactivate a Ruin Golem that we used in the Tanit quests. Just a bit of further evidence on Dottore being Zandik.)

Pulling from Zandik’s Legacy again, we know that he wasn’t a member of the Amurta darshan, so I think it is fair to say that his interest here lies in machinery rather than human biology/anatomy. (Though, honestly, the darshans are so weirdly laid out that who even knows where any one topic of study will show up.) I’m not going to speculate here on which Darshan Dottore might have been in (that’s a future post I'm considering making) because I don’t think it matters due to the fact that we’ve seen three (or maybe four depending on how you count it) separate Darshans work with machinery.

Even if we ignore Zandik’s Legacy, we know that Dottore has definitely studied Khaenri’ahn machinery from Childe’s story quest where we visited his old Ruin Guard research lab.

I wish we had a better answer to exactly what he was doing there (was he just studying them? Was he making his own Ruin Guards?), but it is fair to say that he has likely formed a comprehensive picture of Ruin Guards due to the fact that he abandoned the research lab later on. He doesn’t seem like the type to leave a question unanswered, so he most likely figured out whatever interested him about Ruin Guards.

So if he understands how Ruin Machines work, he is capable of repairing broken ones using pieces from other machines (as mentioned in Zandik’s legacy notes),

"...It should be possible to repair this titanic machine's primary weapons system using components salvaged from abandoned mechanisms, but to avoid attracting the attention of the other team members, I have simply made some basic measurements for now."

and is capable of making human machines (Krupp in the manga);

then I think it is very likely that the prosthetic bodies created for his segments were made using Khaenri’ahn technology (or at least took inspiration from them because he found them so ingenious).

This actually might explain why his segments are so human. Ruin Machines specialize in biomimesis. Every single Ruin Machine we have seen so far (except the Perpetual Mechanical Array, but that’s based on the Algorithm of Semi-Intransient Matrix of Overseer Network (never make me write that out ever again, oh my god), so it’s still mimesis even if it’s not biologically based), has mimicked biological life forms including humans.

So the idea of using Khaenri’ahn technology to create a realistic human is not far-fetched. It would need some sort of skin to complete the mimicry, but that honestly seems much easier to create than the entire functioning robot (but I’m no robotics expert. I could be wrong about that) plus we’ve already seen evidence that Snezhnaya has that kind of capability. Just look at Katheryne. She’s some kind of robot but appears fully human. She might have even been a prototype for the segments. (Though she could equally be a creation of Sandrone's. We don't know enough yet to say. It's equally possible she is a collaboration between the two of them or that they both based their humanoid robots on Khaenri'ahn tech. If my theory about Sandrone's identity turns out to be right, this is actually highly likely.)

(A very human looking and acting robot, Katheryne is.)

Using scavenged Khaenri’ahn technology to build the body would also explain the rarity of the parts needed to build a segment better than the segments being made using purely Snezhnayan technology.

Just building any old robot would be easy for Snezhnaya. Based on passing mentions of their nation having things like trains, they are most likely in the midst of some kind of industrial revolution, so we know they can create intricate metal work with complex moving pieces and engines (also like, Katheryne, again). Plus we’ve seen the mass produced clockwork mecha from Fontaine. It’s not unreasonable to assume that, since Snezhnaya seems like it’s more advanced than Fontaine (compare Fatui elemental guns to the Fontaine muskets), they could produce something similar.

Pristine Khaenri’ahn technology, on the other hand, is a rare find and disabling machines that still work in order to get their parts would result in damage, possibly to the very pieces that Dottore would need. Likely, it takes a great number of Ruin Machines to build a single segment and on top of that they might require specific, potentially rare pieces (such as the Eye of the First Field Tiller that we found with Dainsleif, but that's just an example of a rare piece, not something I think Dottore actually needs to build segments) rather than the run-of-the-mill mass produced legions’ pieces. This is speculation though. We really have no idea about the full intricacies of Ruin Machines.

Now, I hope that was convincing enough on it’s own to establish that Dottore most likely used Khaenri’ahn technology or Khaenri’ahn inspired technology to build the bodies of his segments.

Because my closing argument is the model of what is under his mask and that is understandably not a reliable resource as it hasn't been seen in game.

I know the color scheme is off, but it does remind me of a Ruin Guard's eye. And I don't think anyone can deny that it's very mechanical, even if it doesn't look Khaenri'ahn per se. Before you dismiss this evidence entirely, may I remind you of the monster version of Dottore from the storybook.

Beyond the immediate similarities in the images, I would like to direct your attention to the single eye the monster has and the fact that it was wearing a suit to hide its true body. These are weird details to use if they just wanted to establish that he was a monster. The foxes were happy to accept a cat as a fox. Dottore didn’t have to have a fursona. And if he did, he didn’t have to be a strange, bird-like cyclopes. He could have just been a bird.

(Honestly, I just found myself caught on the detail of the single eye and was sort of confused by the decision until I saw that data mine/leak/whatever it is. I thought it was pretty cool attention to detail, even if they weren’t details we knew about yet. And don’t come at me saying Genshin doesn’t pay that kind of attention to detail. They absolutely do. I remember how Venti's Vision didn't glow in the Unreconciled Stars event because it isn't a real Vision.)

I wrote all of that and then reread Scara's 4th char story and it straight up says he got the segment's bodies from studying Scara, who in turn was based on Khaenri'ahn tech. So I guess I'm right, but not for the reasons I thought. OTL.

So if that’s the body of a segment accounted for, what about the aspect of time?

I’ll admit, his work with god remains threw me for a bit of a loop at first. My initial, tentative speculation was that he had somehow found remains of Istaroth, the god of time, and used them to get his different perspectives of time. This mostly came from the fact that Istaroth was the name of the god of moments in Greek mythology and that fit the idea of the segments very well. However, I am pretty sure this is not the case.

For one: we don’t even have definitive proof that Istaroth is dead. Well… maybe. Neuvillette’s story about Visions included this little gem: “all fragments of the primordial were driven to devour each other,” which might be a reference to the four shades, of which Istaroth was one. In that case, Istaroth would be dead, but the state of their remains, pardon my channeling of Cyno for a moment, remains a mystery.

(Get it? Remains? Cause they're remains that remain? I’ll stop now.)

Anyways, we don’t know exactly what “devour each other” might entail, so we can’t say for certain that Istaroth is dead. They might exist in a different form now instead.

For two: we have another, much more reliable, accessible, and established place where Dottore could have gotten different versions of himself from time: Irminsul. It is well established in canon that Irminsul contains the entirety of a person’s memory/data in Teyvat, and we also know that it is possible to visit Irminsul and access the data stored in it.

So the next question becomes: what proof do we have that Dottore used Irminsul? We’re going to go on a little side track about Irminsul really quick to answer this question.

Remember what Nahida said about Irminsul?

"Irminsul's inner region consists exclusively of torrents of information."

This inner region in question was noticeably blue. And as the quote above, plus other comments and observations made during our foray with Scaramouche into Irminsul suggest, all of the data stored in Irminsul takes on that same glowing, blue color.

This quest is not the first time we have seen the color blue in reference to memories obtained from Irminsul. Remember: all ley lines are roots of Irminsul. What blue phenomena do we see in relation to ley lines? Blossoms of Revelation.

They are described in the adventurer’s handbook as follows:

“A flower blossom known as "Revelation" which grows from the Ley Lines in response to someone's desire for battle. Perhaps the treasures within it can help one recall the perils that they have experienced once before… ”

Computer: zoom, enhance.

“Recall.” Blossoms of Revelation tap into the memories stored in the ley lines. We also know that ley line disorders can disgorge past memories from various quests and events. (Such as during the Caribert quest where we literally experienced our twin’s memories after the Abyss Order messed with the ley lines in the area. There were several others in Inazuma from what I remember but I don’t feel like looking up their names rn. It’s like 2:30 in the morning idgf. This is well established fact. Google it yourself.)

Also, it gives you experience books. Experiences are relived via memories. I really don’t think I need to go further into proving what’s up with the Blossoms of Revelation.

Now what does establishing that blue has to do with memories in Irminsul have to do with Dottore? Let’s take another look at Dottore. In fact, let’s look at every segment of Dottore we have seen so far. The versions from the manga and the game are pretty wildly different.

So what’s the one common point? That’s right. Their blue hair! He can have multiple versions of himself because he has blue hair!!!!

I’m kidding. I mean, that is a common point, but the actual important detail here is that earring.

The earring has held my attention for quite a while because it’s such a strange detail. Why does he have a weird glowing blue vial as an earring? Is it just to show that he loves science? I mean, maybe. We can’t rule that out. But I think it might be something more important. It is the one thing that was not changed between cow-mask Dottore and yassified Dottore. And it’s the same shade of glowing blue as Blossoms of Revelation and Irminsul's heart (and fruits and sapling fragments/information packets and-- I think you get the point).

So my theory is this: the earring contains some form of past data extracted from Irminsul. This is the “save file” that the segment is operating from. Or at least part of it. I’m not convinced Dottore put his entire “brain” into an easy target like that. If we look at the segments we saw in Sumeru, we see some other parts of his outfit with that same blue glow. So it’s more likely that this is simply some overflow or a backup or some other function I haven’t thought of. Or maybe he’s just bragging and it really is his memory drive sitting around as an easy target because he doesn’t think anyone is smart enough to realize what it really is. Fuck if I know.

I think it's also worth pointing out that Scaramouche seemed familiar with navigating the inside of Irminsul. Presumably, this means he's been there before on at least one occasion. (anyone remember if this is directly stated in the quest?) This would imply that the Fatui have had business with Irminsul before. So either they're editing time for their own reasons or Dottore made Scaramouche go fetch these copies of him for him.

And before you say that Scaramouche deleting himself from time means that Dottore couldn't make the segments without him, remember that fate is fate and always happens no matter which form it takes. If Scaramouche couldn't get the data for him, then it would happen in another way. The same applies for him getting the Segment's bodies from studying Scaramouche. (Also, I feel like if Dottore knows about Irminsul's ability to edit memories, he probably would have come up with a way to get around it? That seems very much in his wheelhouse. So we can't be sure that he doesn't remember Scaramouche. I have my own theories about the scope of Irminsul and how you might be able to dodge its edits by being in, say, the Abyss or another place outside Teyvat proper. So if Dottore stuck a segment in one of those places... But that's speculating. And wouldn't apply to the Scaramouche deletion anyways as he'd just erased them all.)

To sum it up: I think the Doctor is getting his past versions of himself by extracting copies of his own data from Irminsul somehow. Perhaps he has a way to make Irminsul give him fruits containing his own data from certain points in time. I have no idea how he's doing it. (If someone else has any ideas of how, please let me know.)

Now, before anyone comes at me all: "um actually we also see blue energy like that from Desheret's civilization, explain that." You're right. We do.

Primenergy (name stolen from Alain Guillotine) is indeed another possibility for what the blue light is. If it's Primenergy rather than Irminsul juice, then it's probably the power source that Dottore has decided to use to power the segments instead of azocite. Which I guess makes the earrings something like a backup battery? And leaves us with no clues as to how he's playing around with time. (Still probably Irminsul as it's the only thing we've seen such capability from.) But there you go. Possibility explored. The Segments could be a mix of Khaenri'ahn and Desheret's technology. It's as likely as any of my other ideas. Hell, it might even make more sense than it being condensed Irminsul juice.

I don’t know that we’ll ever actually get an answer to how Dottore built his segments as we don’t know if he’s going to build more or not. And even if he does, we don’t know that the game will go into how he’s done it. It’s not super relevant to the plot. This was just me satisfying my own curiosity and figuring some other people might have had the same question as me.

Tl;dr: Dottore built the bodies of his segments using Khaenri’ahn technology and put his mind in it using saved copies of himself from Irminsul, which are possibly stored in the glowing blue earrings he wears.

So there we have my theory on how Dottore built his segments. Please, feel free to give me your thoughts and possible refutations/further evidence (comments, reblogs, asks, in the tags, however you feel comfortable talking with me is fine). I would love to know what the rest of you think.

As for future areas I’d like to get some answers on, please hoyo, explain what the fuck he was talking about when he said “A long time ago, I made a major decision in hopes of preserving all my perspectives of how I observed the world.” What the fuck was the major decision? It can’t just be making segments. Does this imply that he had to do something to himself to become capable of making segments at all? Did it have to do with accessing his past records in Irminsul? Did he turn his original body into the first segment? Like, probably that last one, as he should be somewhere between five hundred to four hundred years old, but I demand answers!

(Actually, on that topic, I would really like an answer to whether or not there is a "prime" Dottore, as the fandom likes calling him. We don't actually have any clue what's up with his original body. We just know that all the segments except the Omega segment got deleted. So is Omega the last Dottore or is there still an "original" around as well? Or is Omega original Dottore and all the others are earlier versions of him as he never grew past that age?)

[valkyurii]

It's kinda funny the way the game emphasises how nerfed Malenia is. You talk to Gideon and he suggests she may be dead. You meet Millicent right at the Haligtree and she implies Malenia has lost her sense of self. You enter the boss room and she's still in slumber. Her prosthesis isn't attached. The game's like, "This swordswoman hasn't picked up her sword for years." Finally finally when you defeat her, the game says, "Oh btw her Rune is also nerfed. It's only working because of her spirit."

It’s the game trying to trick us into thinking she’s not going to be a threat lol

“Don’t worry this demigod is well past her prime, she’ll be a push over I’m sure” then we meet her, she stands up, tells us she’s never known defeat and then proceeds to show us exactly why that’s true. But you’re right though, the game does pretty much tell us she’s not quite what she used to be. Which makes sense when we look at what happened in Caelid.

She was all but ready to throw her life away to bring down her opponent. A huge sacrifice on her part too as she unleashes the rot, the very thing she’s spent her whole life suppressing, to try and turn the tide during the fight. She only partially succeeds (she immobilises her target, but fails to kill him) and is then rendered unconscious for the next god knows how long. In that time the rot advances and begins to do more damage to her mind and body. So yeah, by the time we find Malenia she isn’t exactly in a good state. She fights us regardless, but she isn’t that eager to engage with us. Most of the time we have to make the first move. She can be a little slow to respond and approaches us with caution and bides her time. And even though she remains a huge threat to us and puts up a good fight, we still manage to bring her down, causing her to bloom once more. I know a lot of people think she does this on purpose because she’s losing to us, but to me at least it looks more involuntary than anything. She gets knocked out and right at the last second the rot brings her back and transforms her. I don’t think people realise Malenia isn’t truly in control of her life and never really has been. Her whole life has been dictated to by this outer god. The rot isn't some gift she was given, it’s a curse that wants to consume her. Not something she can call upon whenever she feels like without there being dire consequences. Not only to the people around her but also to herself.

Sorry I’m ranting now and kind of going off topic. But yes, post shattering most of the demigods have been nerfed in some way and Malenia is no different. Would honestly love to have seen what she was like before the shattering. There are some mods out there like Ultimate Malenia and Impossible Malenia which might give us an idea how strong she could be. Obviously these are only mods that are designed to make her more challenging, but even still she’s more aggressive, faster and relentless than before. Think Malenia but on steroids and that’s pretty much what you’re facing. Also just got to say that even though she’s considered a terrible boss who’s just so unfair and so terrible, people are still out there trying to find ways to make her more difficult. Malenia’s boss fight really changed up the game and even though folks will complain like fuck about her they still go back to fight her. Considering she’s an optional boss that you in no way need to fight, for a lot of people she becomes the highlight of their runs. Sure for some they only go fight her out of sheer stubbornness and spite and because they want to ‘put her in her place’ and all that bullshit. But taking the weird incels out of the equation I’ve noticed that more and more people have actually started to enjoy her fight. Even for people like me who have fought her hundreds of times, I still get a rush from the fight because she’s just so fun. She keeps you on your toes and personally I think this change that she’s brought to the game is a good thing. It’s a nice change of pace. Obviously I can’t speak for everyone but I love learning these fights and Malenia took me the longest to learn and was by far the most satisfying and rewarding fight I’ve had in one of these games in a long time.

Okay now I really am just ranting off topic. Sorry, anon 😅 Thanks for the message though, I hope you are well!

[ximercr]

Description of Aziraphael in my fanfic:

(Translated through a translator)

They were above average in their status: each had problems, but not that tangible. The main asset of the Eden settlement was Aziraphael Fell. A scientist that graduated from the military science academy and biomedical college and had many certificates in military strategy and medicine. The doctor's appearance could be described as the embodiment of an angel with a deadly sword behind his back: he had blond, neatly styled hair and fair skin, which contrasted with his sharp, penetrating blue eyes the color of clear sky, full of light and determination. There is a subtlety to his image - there are elegant facial lines and expressive features, as well as old but practical clothing that combines elements of military uniforms and casualness, making him both a soldier and a scholar. Thinking about why he is useful, at least to the inhabitants of Eden, one can come to the conclusion that he is sharp minded, collected and resourceful. He is not lost in difficult situations and is always ready to offer an unconventional solution to a problem and a helping hand. He is characterized by faith and perseverance, which helps the city in difficult and dangerous moments. Also the fact that he is an excellent fighter and killer only confirm the words about Angel: he will not touch anyone without a known reason, before this allrovno warning and apologizing.

Aziraphael is also a master of military strategy, well versed in anatomy and physiology, which allows him not only to treat the wounded, but also to understand the weaknesses of zombies. He is skilled in hand-to-hand combat, shooting, and stealth tactics, making him an indispensable team member in confrontations with enemies. His main goal is to find a way to stop the spread of the virus and provide treatment and safety for the group of survivors. He strives to combine intelligence, faith, kindness, and physical strength to protect his comrades by teaching them survival skills and organizing effective sorties and cures.

But like every human, Aziraphael has his oddities and peculiarities. Some of them are visible to everyone, and some of them are hidden from prying eyes, perhaps because of complexes, perhaps to have an alibi for an emergency, or maybe just so as not to draw attention to his person.

He had a huge advantage over other scientists and military men - an iron arm, which gave him great strength when striking and invulnerability to bites and cuts from zombies. It could be said that it played a role in selecting a fighter for the most difficult sorties. Everyone understood that with Aziraphael's medical knowledge they were obliged to keep him safe and not send him into the thick of it, but the strength and initiative to help and protect Angel was a strong argument. Many people who had been in operations with Fell owed their lives and health to him.

The hand itself the owner did not like as it left an imprint of the past that would go with him to the grave. But even Aziraphael himself understood its importance and usefulness. The prosthesis was fully mobile and unbreakable thanks to classified military technology. It also consisted of plates that covered it completely, giving the limb extra protection, and on the shoulder was a mark that showed its affiliation with military research and medicine. The metal arm was implanted in the skin and it was impossible to tear it off without crippling the man, so Angel couldn't get rid of the memories.

How was it obtained? On one of his missions, Aziraphael was enslaved by scientists who used humans for experiments. After four years of torment, Fell escaped by using his hand power, which was an attempt to create a super-soldier. Upon reaching the nearest military base he not only provided the best evidence and data, but also got a job in military research and medicine, gradually honing his skills.

To date, Angel has not only used the acquisition for good, but I think he has become grateful to her for the opportunity to save lives, albeit at such a cost.

(I couldn't find the author of the art, please email me if you disagree with its publication, apologies and thanks for your hard work!)

[dr-d-of-team-blu]

Hello, Dr. Degenhardt! It’s nice to meet you!

I hope you don’t mind receiving a message from me, especially since I’ve contacted the RED team in the past. Embarrassingly (for someone who’s currently talking to trained mercenaries), I’m a bit of a pacifist, and tend to try and be fair to both sides of a conflict. Seeing RED jumping on you and your team’s posts to insult you—especially when some of you don’t often go out of your way to antagonize them—did feel a little sad to me, so I wanted to send you something nice!

I think your mask looks very lovely, I quite enjoy your bird aesthetic. I also completely understand your hesitance to remove it—sometimes, having to accustom people to one’s more unconventional parts over and over can be much more difficult than simply ‘masking’ them, if you’ll pardon the pun. However, as an asexual person myself, appearances don’t matter to me nearly as much as personality, and quite frankly, from what I’ve seen of you so far, you seem like a wonderful person to be around. Would I be incorrect in believing you to be a bit introspective, but rather thoughtful and kind when given the opportunity? I’ve also heard that you’re a bit lonely and haven’t much to do around the base. Would you appreciate some book or music recommendations?

Please forgive me if I seem a bit awkward. With the RED mercenaries, it’s a bit easier to know where I stand, since every single one of them (save Spy, and perhaps Pyro) is quite outgoing. You, on the other hand, seem much more like me, in that you keep to yourself somewhat—which gives us something in common, though not something that’s terribly easy to bond over, haha! I’m certainly not upset about this, just noting a fact.

(Also, I think that it’s perfectly valid of you not to be confrontational on the battlefield. There are multiple, equally functional strategies that can be used in fighting. While one Medic-strategy can be to stay alive by being a threat to everybody else, another can be to direct your teammates and serve as a ‘support’ to them (which is the class that a team’s medic is part of, is it not?) from behind the front lines. And both work well! If I wanted to protect a generator powering my house from sabotage, I could either cover it in spikes or lock it behind a reinforced barrier, both of which would prevent it from being harmed. I hope that makes sense…)

Anyhow, I hope you’re doing well and taking care of yourself, Doctor. And don’t forget, there’s no shame in knowing when to walk away from a fight, especially online! Better that you take care of your health for the battlefield than exhaust yourself sparring verbally with the REDs.

~ half-moon anon

You are very sweet! I have not be around much, prior to my finding of Mikhail's phone, so I do not recognise you from any prior correspondence.

You are correct that often it is not just about people finding me scary or unpleasant due to my scars, many times it is the constant questions that I want to avoid. I have not wanted to show my face to my team for this very reason, I do not want to feel like a freak or like something to be pitied. The mask is safer in that way, and so is the prosthesis.

I suppose I am more introverted, ja. I try to... Put myself out there so to speak, as most of the BLUs are equally as outgoing as the REDs, but it is not always easy. Messing with the REDs when I first arrived... It stressed me out after a while and I did not like it. I did not find it as fun as I thought I would.

Danke, for your kind words. They mean a lot to me.

[calywitsune]

WAAA I GOT ON A ROLL WITH THIS AND COULDN'T STOP!!

Slayer!AU Dokuchi!! The Poison Hashira ☠

Manga spoilers below!!

Dokuchi lost his right arm in his youth to a demon attack, which lead him to discovering the Corps and persevering through training to join them. His technique is akin to fencing to facilitate his one-handedness. After finishing the final selection, he was assigned Saiboku as his swordsmith, who had already been creating prostheses for slayers with disabilities; his side project was trying to engineer prostheses that could emulate the kind of human movement Yoriichi Type Zero could do (a task made more difficult seeing as he was not permitted to take it apart).

Suspending some disbelief as to how the prosthesis works, think of it as a rudimentary form of automail from FMA. There are gears inside the arm and joints, along with a few wires that are attached to the musculature of the wearer to facilitate more natural movement. It would be a highly invasive procedure, one that Saiboku did not want to just test on anyone until he knew of a less invasive way to affix it to a slayer. But Doku was certain he wanted to try Saiboku's prototype.

The arm is made of Paulownia wood! "Empress Tree or Princess Tree", traditionally planted at the birth of an aristocratic baby girl and fashioned into a dresser on her wedding day. Its light, warp resistant, and the low silica content reduces the dulling of blades. Perfect for sheathing and protecting a hidden blade (like Hyakkimaru's prosthesis from Dororo).

Doku can fight two-handed now with the prosthesis, and it makes every day life much easier, but he tends to prefer his one-handed style as it's what he's used the most.

Also don't worry, lil Akane is still with him in this AU~

[froggarolli]

Daily HC: Prostheses

We'll be covering Fizzarolli's prostheses, how I headcanon them, and me attempting to ground them in some kind of reality and not just say Uuuuh it's hell-technology— although at certain points... you gotta give in bfbeb

It'll be a long one, and I'll link this on my blog for easy access.

Originally I wanted to cover All his disabilities in this post, but it'd get... way too fucking long, so we'll stick to the limbs in this one. You can read a quick over view of them tho in this post.

Aight let's go—

Limbs

Fizzarolli, as we all know, is a quadruple amputee. I'll be covering each limb-type, how he interacts with the world around him, and where his strengths and limitations lie.

Legs

The legs use a vacuum system that creates a suction-like effect that keeps the prosthesis in place. Fizzarolli can run, jump, do all his little tricks, and you won't be able to just grab a hold of them and rip them off of his residual limbs, like it's not going to happen. The suction can be turned on and off, and as long as he has it on, they stay on.

Why did I pick these instead of osseointegration abutments (basically having it attached to the bone)? Well, Fizzarolli is doing a Lot of high impact performing. He lands from high places all the time, he runs, he wildly flails those legs around like nobody's business... If they were attached to his bones, he'd be in harms way Constantly, be at risk for infections, it's Simply not worth it. Besides, his residual limbs, his thighs, are long enough that the prosthesis makes sense with how it attaches. I chose something more realistic for this portrayal, and it allows Fizzarolli to rest his body and take care of his sensitive skin from the fire as well.

Of course, this does not rule out injuries, or chafing for that matter.

I am aware that the prosthesis isn't all powerful, that it'd probably be difficult to say that it's a perfect answer what with How Much Fizzarolli moves around, but that's unfortunately where we just have to suspend our disbelief for the sake of what the show gives us.

Arms

The arms were difficult for me to decide on what to do with... since we can see a disk when Asmodeus attaches Fizzarolli's arm in "Oops".

So in this case, I did opt for osseointegration abutments. This is because the show has shown Fizzarolli's upper body plenty of times... so I can't really make the argument that he's using a harness or pin-locks. He also clearly does not have residual limbs to use suction or a roll-on linear system to keep the prosthesis on.

The disk, I want to argue, is there to keep the skin around the abutment protected. I imagine there's a soft material on the other side of it that prevents chafing and injuries, at least to the best of its ability. The disk is attached, and then after that, so is the arm.

People can work out with osseointegration abutments, and Fizzarolli can try and perform in a way that he keeps the strain on them low, something that's more difficult with his legs. It's not perfect, and there's a Lot of aftercare that he needs to do to keep himself in working condition.

I could also argue that one of the reasons why he doesn't do as many shows as he used to is because after years of performing, he's experienced that it wears him, his skin, muscles and bones out. Even if he feels fine in the moment of the performance, it leaves long-lasting problems, and he was able to limit his performing once he got more financially stable.

Abilities and Limitations

Fizzarolli can grasp objects, lift relatively heavy things if he wraps his arms around the object enough times (see: him wielding Blitzø as a weapon), shoot his arms and legs out with hydraulic pressure, pull things in using the mechanics of his arms, NOT his own strength (think of it when you hit the button on your vacuum cleaner and the chord comes flying inside... y'all know what Fizz can do).

He can walk with his legs and bend both legs and arms at any part of the prosthesis, i.e. he does not have points that are considered his knees or elbows. This made his prostheses especially difficult to adjust to, really difficult to learn how to walk with, and it's honestly almost easier to throw yourself forward than just walk with these spaghetti legs. Which is why he usually does just that. It's just a bonus that he looks like a rubber hose animation-

Touch

Fizzarolli cannot feel touch, heat or cold. This isn't some kind of magical super technology, while it is advanced, I believe the show supports this as well.

A big part of Fizzarolli and Asmodeus' love language is nuzzling their faces together. This leads me to believe that the show is telling us that this is the best way for them to achieve skin contact, or physical contact at all really. With this information, I am not going to hc that he can sense anything through his prostheses because of hell-magic. And this leads me to...

Navigating his own body off stage

It's no secret that Fizzarolli sucks at fighting. Look we all know it let's just be nice to him...

But he usually manages to get a hold of a situation if he twists and spins himself and his punches to a certain degree. He doesn't have enough strength to actually do proper damage on his own, so he uses momentum (launching himself), physics (coiling up his arm like a spring) and objects around him (see: Blitzø) to achieve it.

There's a certain disconnect to these limbs because they Are as advanced as they are. Yes, they're great for performing!! But they don't work like regular arms or legs, not even close. They can get pulled out and don't have a solid shape to work with, so the physical therapy took forever (one of my arguments why Loo Loo Fizzy got made so soon), and he pretty much had to relearn how to navigate his body all over again. That on top of him not feeling when his prostheses actually touch stuff, and the concentration it takes to move around... when he feels threatened or cornered, controlling these things becomes much more difficult than if he's on stage, doing what he loves and what he's been training like a mad man to get right.

This is why Fizzarolli learning self-defense from Blitzø is on my wishlist

In conclusion, Fizzarolli is a fucking powerhouse for getting all of this to work together the way he does, but it doesn't mean that it's not a struggle at times as well. There's a lot of things he needs to do to stay healthy and safe, and this will be reflected in my portrayal.

[desolatedpigeon]

CW: descriptive suicidal thoughts, slight mention of drug abuse

As I sit in my room, covered in blankets that I should wash again, a thought occurs to me. I look up from my laptop and look over at my soccer scarves. The air is stuffy in here. A few rays of sunlight come in through the curtains. Thanks to them, I can see the smoke in my room. I should smoke less. But then a thought occurs to me: why am I still alive? It's not as if I've never tried. So to end it. Or to live. Every now and then I feel like I'm missing someone. Or something. There are many things I miss. My ex-fiancé, my first cat, my first dog, the special musician, my third dog, that guy whose name is the name of my favorite beer. I miss things, moments, a future that won't exist. Not because there is no future. But because this future doesn't exist. Much more the different futures that I would have liked to have. I also realize that I currently have no reason to believe in a future at all.

But what I miss most is myself. Basically, I don't even exist. Well, I do exist, I breathe, I go to the toilet like any other person. I eat, I have feelings, I think. My skin flakes come off and turn to dust. But something is missing. Something has been taken from me. You can't really say who took it. Maybe the people who abused me. Maybe myself. Maybe the people who have been insulting me for years and spreading lies about me. Most likely all of the above. If something is broken, you should fix it.

But can I even be repaired? I don't think so. I don't think I'll ever be able to cope with anything. Maybe with really good therapy. But no one promises that it will work. There's no cure for borderline (as far as I know). Some people are missing an arm, I'm missing me. There's no prosthesis for me.

My gaze glides around the room I'm sitting in. I see fan merchandise from clubs, a Ukrainian flag, posters and flags from bands, a TV, a Playstation 4 and all kinds of other stuff. And garbage, lots of garbage. A thought comes into my head. I don't think I can do it all anymore. I plan how I can stop myself from calling for help if I pop pills again. I think about it like it's the most normal thing in the world.

I could lock me in from the inside and put the key somewhere I can't reach it. Or throw it out of the window.

Or put my phone up somewhere so I can't reach it. The battery should also be empty so that I have to charge it for a few minutes before I can switch it on. In that time, I might pass out.

Besides, what if I wake up again?

The last time was in hospital and I was actually relatively well. But is it the same when you wake up at home after a high dose of the drug in question? That must be terrible. I'm not afraid of death. Only of dying and the danger of waking up again and pretending that nothing has happened.

I briefly imagine what it would be like if I simply didn't wake up. And my heart suddenly becomes very light and everything feels good. As if someone had lifted all the weight off me. I even smile for a brief moment. I am carefree. Everything would finally be over.

Then I realize that I have probably just decided to give up again. That I'm going to get some more pills and leave this life. My gaze goes to my fan scarves, then to the flag and finally to my favorite player's jersey. I'm going to miss these things. Well, actually I won't, as I wouldn't be here anymore. But I don't want them to end up in the trash either. I could give them away before I die, but what if I do survive? Again, it's a difficult thought. But actually, giving them away is out of the question anyway. If I were to do that, the people I'm even considering, would immediately know what's going on. I won't let them stop me again, because all this pain must finally be over.

Sometimes I just feel like writing, like now or the entries before. Surely I could continue working on one of my books instead of somehow shitting down this mishmash of thoughts and experiences. But often I can't concentrate on my books and their stories. Something simple will have to do. If anyone ever reads this, my condolences. It must be terrible to read.

[denial-permanente]

We are trying to prevent shrinking. How long before you noticed a change? How often do you recommend to be out to prevent?

Tom here. Turns out that I wrote something about this recently:

So many guys ask about shrinkage.

No, not the Seinfeld kind of shrinkage; this thread is about the concerns that some men have that short or long term lockups will have a bad affect on their manhood, either causing it to shrink, or causing one to lose the ability to have an erection.

First, let's set your mind at ease: If you're having fun being locked up, you'll be fine. Probably.

The caveat: there are many different types of devices and cages, and there are many differently shaped and sized penises. There are probably combinations that are not recommended, and stuffing your sausage into a cage that is a bad angle, poorly made, or overly small or large may have some impact.

The good news: removing the device and spending some time having normal ejections will probably bring everything back to normal.

Let's look at some of the concerns.

Shrinkage

It's important to remember something that you probably missed in biology class: the penis is not a muscle. In fact, there is very little muscle in there - it's mainly meat balloons that fill with blood, and a lot of connective tissue. Austin Powers notwithstanding, penis pumps won't make you appreciably bigger, and by the same token, chastity cages won't make you appreciably smaller.

Most anecdotal reports of men shrinking with cage use are unsubstantiated, and are frequently reported by guys who have a fascination or even fetish for penis shrinking. Their reported "loss of two inches" is probably wishful thinking, or intentionally measured in such a way as to appear smaller.

Some reports indicate that the long term lack of use of one's penis (in a medical situation) may result in tissue atrophy up to 10%. This means that an "average" man will lose about a half inch of length and maybe an eight inch of diameter.

However, significant weight change, age, and some medications can have an affect on penis size, affecting both girth and length. If you are taking hormones while wearing a cage, you might attribute loss of tissue to the cage. Weight gain could put fat pads in your groin, making it look like your penis has shrunk in length. And for those of us passing the mid-century mark, well, getting older just screws with your body in ways we can't explain.

Erection functionality

This one is more difficult to explain. Some men have reported an inability to have an erection or difficulty with erection after wearing a device for as little as a week or two. My opinion is that they are (if they are being truthful) acting out a fetish or fantasy, but I can't rule out that they may have squished themselves into a ridiculously small cage with no prior experience. Again, many of the reports don't give details, and are otherwise unsubstantiated.

That said, there are probably even more anecdotal reports that simply removing one's device and spending a few days or weeks with unfettered erections will restore your equipment to its former glory.

Some who wear a device for long periods of time (for some value of long) have reported experiencing a loss of elasticity of the skin (it feels like your erection is "tight"), but it seems to disappear after a few days of free range woody.

Medical science, as much as I can find over the last twenty years, does not present any hard data on long term wearing of chastity devices. However, we do have data on other aspects of penile dysfunction that may allow us to make educated guesses.

Abstract

"Even nerve-sparing radical prostatectomy damages the cavernous nerves and leads to temporary erectile dysfunction (ED) in men recovering from prostate cancer surgery. Historically, patients recovering from prostate cancer surgery have been advised that the return of erectile function (EF) can take from 6 to 18 months, or even longer. Unfortunately, the return of sexual function in these patients remains variable, but is generally thought to be dependent on the individual patient's pre-surgery EF, as well as the degree of cavernous nerve disruption during prostate removal. Recently, there has been a growing movement to proactively treat patients postoperatively for presumed nerve damage to stimulate nerve recovery and possibly reduce the degree of irreversible damage. This would reduce the on-demand therapy these patients would require, and hopefully remove the requirement for an implantable prosthesis. The underlying hypothesis is that the artificial induction of erections shortly after surgery facilitates tissue oxygenation, reducing cavernosal fibrosis in the absence of nocturnal erections, potentially increasing the likelihood of preserving EF. Vacuum erection devices (VED), because of their ability to draw blood into the penis regardless of nerve disturbance, have become the centerpiece of penile rehabilitation protocols. This review will discuss the pathophysiology of radical prostatectomy induced ED and the rationale for rehabilitation. It will then discuss current protocols, including those involving the VED."

The article above references the growth of tissue fibroids (which may affect size, shape, and quality of erections) after long periods of disuse, and the treatment of erectile function with vacuum pumps. While it does not apply directly to chastity usage, it does point up that the main factor is probably the lack of erections in the first place.

Many men trapped in chastity cages know that their bodies are still trying to have erections; the tissue swells up to fill the inside of the cage, and pushes back on the root (tendons and tissue) back into the body. As long as this kind of action is still happening, then your body is responding to arousal in the way it was programmed.

There is the possibility that an improperly fitting cage can cause a problem with a penis pre-disposed to Peyronie's disease - a condition resulting from fibrous scar tissue that develops in the penis and causes curved and/or painful erections. How do you know if your cage is not fitting well? My opinion is that if your penis is painful when you are getting aroused in your cage, then you may want to investigate that.

Again, the only actual data we have is on men who have severe erectile dysfunction as a result of other medical conditions. Chastity fans need to be discriminating when reading reports about the problems (or even the lack of problems) with wearing a device for longer periods.

[kingfritzhater]

If they lived...

AOT headcanons of how different ships would live if they were still alive.

Manga Spoilers!!!

Eruri:

They move outside of Paradis, Erwin always wanted to know if there were humans outside the walls and now he wants to know how different their lives are from what he knows.

Once they settle down and Levi opens his teashop, Erwin offers to help but Levi won’t allow him as he thinks the tea he makes is horrendous, in the end, Erwin manages the money and Levi takes care of the rest. 

They still spend a lot of time with Gabi and Falco, Gabi always insists in moving Levi’s wheelchair (since Erwin is still missing an arm), and Falco adores listening to Erwin’s stories about the survey corps and life inside the walls.

Eremika:

They live hidden in Paradis, they built a little cottage in one of the giant tree forests outside of where the walls were and are very careful to stay hidden, Eren feels guilty that Mikasa has to live hiding like she was when her family was prosecuted by the government, but she doesn’t care, she still has him and their friends.

The remaining members of the alliance visit them pretty often, bringing them gifts from all around the world, Armin sends them books and pictures of the places they visit by mail every time he can. 

Many years go by, and Eren still can’t believe that this is his life, the day he notices some grey hairs and wrinkles in Mikasa’s face he starts crying from just the realisation of how happy he is to grow old together.

Levihan:

Hange is pretty sad when titans stop existing, so to make them happy Levi helps them get their hands on any scientific information that the outside world has developed, no matter how much it costs.

Hange switched their passion for titans to the works of the human body (and they almost fainted once they found out about germ theory), so Levi became their test subject for any time she wanted to test something that they read in some book.

Hange makes it their life purpose to find a way to make Levi be able to walk again, and after coming up with a pretty good prototipe some previous members of the military come asking for help for their missing limbs, so now they make prosthesis for free to anyone who needs it.

Nicosasha:

They open a restaurant in the countryside, Sasha plants a garden to get fruits and vegetables and hunts for the meat and Niccolo does the cooking.

When Niccolo decided to propose, he asked her father for his approval, what he did not expect was having to get the approval of Jean, Connie, Mikasa, Historia and Levi, the old captain was just as terrifying in a wheelchair as he was before.

They usually babysit Historia’s child since they live pretty close and they get along pretty well, the first name she learned how to say was hers, though it sounded more like “asha”, Sasha will always brag that she is the best aunt in the world.

Yumihisu/Yumikuri:

The baby still exists, but the farmer is just a way to keep Historia safe, yet Ymir still finds similarities between them and jokes about if Historia isn’t sure that she isn’t hers.

Ymir always remembers how she didn’t even have a name as a child, so now every achievement of their daughter is recorded, in fact, she asked Historia to get her a camera from the outside world to be more efficient in this task.

They both are the kind of parent that likes to show off their child to anyone who will listen, no matter how ashamed she gets.

Mobuhan:

They never settle down, both travel the world discovering new places and wonders, it started when Onyankopon invited them to his homeland and now they can’t stop, unintentionally they’ve done more for Paradis’s international relationships than anyone else just by making friends wherever they go.

Moblit proposes out of the blue, even taking Hange by surprise, they were visiting some place and Hange looked the happiest they’ve ever been and with the excuse of looking for something he left, Moblit ran to the nearest jewelry store and bought a ring, asking the question that night, Hange said yes in tears.

Their wedding is the biggest event Paradis has seen in recent years, even when the current military does not like them they can’t do anything without risking a major international conflict, specially with so many important figures present.

Reibert:

They move away from Libero, Bertholdt’s father had died, and Reiner’s mother being there hurt him too much, so they go back to Paradis, enjoying their lives away from the city.

As a way to silently pay back to the people of the island, and also due to Reiner’s love for children, they often volunteer in orphanages or help local schools and families, it does not take them long to adopt a boy and a girl.

Gabi and Falco visit them constantly, Gabi is the only way Reiner keeps contact with the rest of his family and she adores their children, Falco almost fainted when one of them called him uncle.

Jeanmarco:

Marco lost an eye in Trost, even then, they both join the survey corps as a way to honor their lost comrades, any time he sees Marco during a mission Jean worries that he won’t be as lucky this time, and that Marco might die that day.

They were horrified when he discovered how deep the corruption in the military police went, more Marco than Jean, so once Historia becomes the queen they offer all the advice they can give about reforms to the military.

Post rumbling, they both settle down in a nice house where once was wall Sina, now tired from the battle, the only missions they do are negotiations between Paradis and the rest of the world, they are the first to retire.

Kenuri:

Uri punches Kenny in the face when he discovered that he hid the fact that he had a nephew and abandoned him, it took a week of Kenny begging for Uri to talk to him again, now he adores Levi and finds it amusing how similar he is to Kenny.

They both love Historia and try to help her in any way they can with her labours as queen, Uri gives her advice and helps her to gain the trust of many important figures in Paradis and Kenny takes a more aggressive approach, threatening to kill anyone who questions her authority.

When Historia’s baby is born they go in full grandfather mode, once they met her they could not stop crying and at one point Uri had to try to take her away from Kennys arms, a pretty difficult task due to their height difference

Petruo/Auretra:

They've been together for years, but only told their families after the female titan arc, Petra’s father felt pretty embarrassed about his earlier conversation with Levi, but didn’t tell their comrades as they felt pretty shy about it.

After the battle of Shiganshina Auruo proposed to her in front of everyone, holding a ring that belonged to his mother and had been holding on to for months now, the only one that wasn’t surprised with this was Levi.

Petra asked Levi to make a small speech at their wedding, which he surprisingly agreed to do, when he did he talked about how he knew Auruo liked Petra from the moment he saw them and how jealous he would get, and would intentionally assign them to the same tasks together by themselves so one of them finally dared to confess, by the time he returned to his table, both of their faces were completely red.

Mikenana:

While Mike managed to hide from the best titan and come out unscarred, Nanaba was not so lucky, losing one of her legs at Utgard Castle and having to retire from the military.

During the uprising arc, Mike joined the new Levi squad and went into hiding, Nanaba became essential to collecting information behind the scenes, as she could easily go under the radar, so she stayed with Hange and Moblit.

When Mike returned from the battle of Shiganshina, Nanaba ran to him in her crutches and jumped into his arms as soon as she was close enough, and didn’t let go until she could convince herself that he really survived.

Hilow/Hitchmaru:

Seeing as her efforts to convince him to not join the survey corps were failing, Hitch just directly confessed her feelings to him as a last effort to save him, Marlowe told her he felt the same way, but he knew his destiny was with the scouts.

Both Marlowe and Floch survived the battle of Shiganshina, when Floch starts talking very sharply to the families of the deceased Marlowe shuts him up, when Hitch asks him why he is so determined to stop him he says “Imagine if I died and he said those things to you”.

Marlowe is captured by the jaegerists and couldn’t join the alliance, once Hitch manages to free him he expresses his frustration with not being able to go to battle, yet he is still happy that he does not have to leave Hitch one more time.

[starlightrows]

In The Eye Of The Beholder

Chapter 1

Next →

Pairing: Commander Wolffe x reader

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: brief description and mildly graphic medical jargon about losing an eye and having a prosthetic implant placed

Summary: Shortly after the events of the Battle of Khorm, the Kaminoans don’t see the value in moving forward with treatment for Commander Wolffe... you, the GAR doctor on the Coruscant disagree

“I don’t remember asking for your goddamn opinion ambassador!” you shout up at the pale long necked Kaminoan, who’s been passively berating you in an attempt to get your patient taken off life support. Your communicator goes off loudly, and you feel no shame in looking at it instead of listening to the Kaminoan ambassadors retort.

“I’m sorry ambassador, but this discussion is over. The requisition for the cybernetic prosthesis has gone through and whether you like it or not, I am going to give that man a fighting chance. He didn’t lay down his life to be tossed out with the garbage. Now get out of my med bay,” your turn on your heel, and begin speaking into your comlink to arrange for the surgery to get underway immediately.

The procedure took nine grueling hours to fully clear out the wound, put in the prosthetic eye and reconstruct the damage to the soldier's facial structure. He stood a good chance of making a full recovery if the cybernetic innervations healed correctly. Now it was just a matter of letting him rest and wake up in his own time.

Most clone troopers in the GAR hospital didn’t get many visitors, most didn’t stay long enough to need visitors though the ones that lived through their ordeals usually recovered on transports back to the front line. But this trooper had a frequent visitor, a Jedi.

“He must be a very good commander for you to check in on him so often,” you comment one afternoon, standing by the door. The tall Kel Dor turned to face you.

“He is. A dutiful, loyal, hardworking commander. But that is not why I come to see him,” he says

“Why then? Certainly a Jedi Master and a General in the Grand Army of the Republic has many duties and responsibilities to see to,” you approach the bed with your tray of fresh wound dressings for his eye.

“The same reason you advocated for him when the Kaminoans wanted to let him die. He is a person. An individual. He is a good man. And he is a member of my team,” he explains while you work to remove the bandages that keep the stitches and cybernetics clean.

“You care for him,” you say with a smile, applying a layer of bacta gel to the stitches with a cotton bud.

“Indeed. I care for him, and all of his brothers that serve under my command. I am not the only one who worries after his health,” The jedi steps around you, trying not to be in the way.

“Well that makes two of us. I don’t even know him, but I want him to live. And not just to keep serving the republic,” you finish applying the bacta gel and begin rewrapping his head with clean bandages.

“You have a good heart doctor, and better view of the troopers than most. I think he’ll like you when he has the chance to formally meet you,” the jedi says

“I should hope so, he’ll have to come back fairly regularly for check ups and case study updates. He’s the first living being with this particular model of prosthesis. If he doesn’t like me, it’ll be a very unpleasant couple months until the study is complete,” you’ve finished wrapping his head, but find you can’t stop looking at his handsome face. True you’ve seen thousands exactly like his before, but right now it’s as if you’ve never seen anyone like him.

“I’ll be the first to admit, he’s stubborn and a bit gruff. But he’s not so bad once you get to know him, he’s fiercely protective and hates to feel weak. This will be a difficult recovery for him, but I have confidence in him. And in you doctor,” you tear your gaze away from the commander and smile at the jedi.

“Thank you master jedi,” you give him a small bow of your head out of respect.

“Plo,” he says “No need for such formalities,” you wonder briefly if he is smiling beneath his deoxygenator, it certainly sounds like it.

“And him? They don’t include their chosen names in their identification codes, just CC and CT numbers. I doubt he goes by his CC number day to day,” you pack away your equipment, unfortunately other patients are waiting, as much as you would love to stay and chat with the kind jedi master. Plo tracks your movements, he senses your rising anxieties about having to leave and attend to other matters in the hospital. Just as you’re about to leave without getting an answer, Plo speaks up.

“His name is Wolffe”

—

Much to your delight, Commander Wolffe does wake up within a few days. And he’s every bit the stubborn, defensive, and unwilling patient Master Plo promised he would be. He keeps getting up and trying to leave despite obviously being in immense physical pain, he’s already ripped his stitches once, and he’s down right refusing to let you get near him to check the wound and change the dressing.

“Commander Wolffe I am at my wits end here. I’m going to step out to allow you a visitor, and when I come back you will be laying on that bed, I am changing those dressings, you are taking your medication. Is that that clear?” You bark at him. He glares at you with his one amber eye but does not respond.

You push the door open and see Master Plo waiting on the other side.

“He’s all yours General, talk some sense into him if you can,” you toss the comment over your shoulder as you head down to the nurses station for a cup of water.

Master Plo enters the patient room, and finds Wolffe pacing against the far wall. His head snaps up, and he visibly struggles to bring the newcomer into his field of vision.

“General!” Wolffe says in surprise, straightening his posture

“Wolffe, your doctor tells me you’re refusing care,” Plo closes the door behind him.

“I should be out there,” Wolffe growls “Kriff… I shouldn’t even be alive right now. They’re keeping me alive to keep me in a box!”

Plo senses that there is something more, something he’s holding back, beyond wanting to be released from med bay.

“You know better than most that withholding the truth can be the determining factor between life and death,” Master Plo says carefully, approaching Wolffe with slow movements “but this truth is one that needs to be shared,”

Wolffe’s shoulders drop and what little color he’s managed to regain drains from his face. His knees give out and he sinks down onto the floor, tears stain both his good cheek and the bandage. Master Plo moves to join him on the floor.

“Good soldiers don’t lay around in hospital beds and weep over superficial pain,” Wolffe says weakly “Soldiers that don’t recover quickly… get decommissioned and sent back to Kamino in a box,”

“You are already recovering quickly, and your doctor can give you something for the pain so you can heal faster,” Plo says cooly “You are not being sent back to Kamino. Your doctor made sure of that,”

“What?” Wolffe was surprised to hear this, up to this point all of his conscious interactions with you had been rather gruff and none too friendly, he can’t imagine why you weren’t doing everything in your power to get him out of your hospital and out of your way.

“A Kaminoan ambassador came to assess treatment at this hospital and saw your condition, they incorrectly assumed that it would be more beneficial to cease all treatment. Your doctor, shall we say, violently disagreed,”

“Violently sir?”

“They were furious she went ahead with the surgery. Believe me, if someone had recorded it on a holo I would show it to you. It was quite the spectacle,” Master Plo laughs “She was adamant that you deserved a fighting chance,”

—

Later that evening after General Plo had left, you returned to Wolffe’s room with a tray of equipment to change his dressings, and medicine to help with the pain.

“Commander Wolffe if I come into this room and you throw something or scream at me, I will have you physically restrained,” you say sharply before fully entering the room. He’s sitting on the bed facing away from the door.

“I won’t yell,” he replies quietly without turning around, his tone is decidedly gentler than before. Whatever the General said to him must have done the trick. You approach him cautiously, rounding the end of his bed so you could get a good look at him. His face is set in a harsh grimace.

“Are you in pain?” You ask. He nods but doesn’t reply. “I am going to change those dressings and we’re gonna test out that new eye. I think with a good dose of anti inflammatory medication, and some intraocular movement you’ll feel better,”

He nods again, you drag a chair over and sit in front of him, he doesn’t bat your hand away when you move to unwrap his bandages. The silvery white cybernetic eye under the protective padding is downcast to match its whiskey gold twin. The stitches are finally healing up with the help of the bacta gel.

“Good news Commander I think you’re healed enough you won’t need a fresh bandage. Now let’s see how well this prosthesis works. Can you look at my nose?” You remove a penlight from your pocket and shine it in each of his eyes.

You run through a series of tests asking him to stare straight ahead at you, follow the light with his eyes, and tell you when he can or can’t see you moving the end of the pen out of his vision. Pressure and tightness on his left side subsides he continues moving his eye around.

“Your reactions look normal, how does it feel?” you click off your penlight and tuck it away.

“Hurts a bit less,” he quietly admits “I’m sorry about before,”

His change in demeanor is a surprise but a welcome one, far better than him trying to escape or aggressively get away from you. You give him a small cup with the anti inflammatory medicine in it, and second small cup with water. He takes the pills without complaint. You remain seated in front of him, to maintain this comfortable closeness.

“It’s okay. I know this isn’t easy,” you give him a sympathetic look.

“General Plo mentioned that you advocated for me, I would be dead if it wasn’t for you…” he falters “thank you,”

That familiar feeling you had before when he was still on life support crept back up on you. Heartbreak for how much he and his brothers have to sacrifice, longing to show him the appreciation he deserves, and something else, something you can’t place.

“This war won’t last forever. You deserve the chance to live in the freedom and peace you fight so hard to protect,”

He’s a bit stunned. Sure he’s heard a handful of politicians advocating for clone rights, but he’s never heard anyone say something like this. He can tell your words are genuine and heartfelt.

“Is there any way I can repay you, or thank you for sticking your neck out for me?” He asks “It takes guts to stand up to those soulless bastards,”

“Well ah… don’t thank me too fast. I know you didn’t exactly sign up for this but your prosthetic is a brand new top of the line prototype. By default you’re a participant in the longitudinal study of its effectiveness,” you admit sheepishly. He raises an eyebrow and peers at you. “On the positive side, you’ll get a bit more shore leave to come in for appointments,”

“Well that’s certainly nothing to complain about. My offer still stands, can I take you out as a thank you?”

You smile warmly and quirk up a brow to match him. “Take me out? Hm… I get off in a couple hours and you’re being discharged from med bay today, I’m game if you give me a chance to run home and ditch my scrubs,”

“It’s a deal,”

[jokerfan99]

My Top 10 Favorite Anime Heroines by DarkChild316

Being a hero isn’t easy, but someone’s gotta do it! And these ladies have shown to be just as capable as their male counterparts. Now I’ve already done a list showing everyone “My Top 10 Anime Villainesses”, but I figured: “Hey the good girls deserve some love too,” so I decided to give you guys my list of my Favorite Anime Heroines as well. So, with that in mind, here’s my list:

#10. Saeko Busujima (Highschool of the Dead): This is an anime that will give you plenty of two things in abundance…boobs and zombies! While it may seem like your run-of-the-mill apocalyptic fanservice anime, among the well-proportioned ladies is this kendo warrior who’s more than capable of holding her own against any foe and would fit right in with even the most old-school samurai-themed anime. When the dead start to walking most of the cast usually reach for a form of firearms, not this lady who prefers to slice apart the undead with the greatest of discipline and precision, whether it be with her signature bokken or her deadly Murata-tou sword. There’s no denying that Saeko’s the ideal companion we’d want on our side for a zombie apocalypse.

#9. Touka Kirishima (Tokyo Ghoul): Living as a ghoul isn’t easy, especially when you’re trying your damnest to retain what little remains of your humanity. Starting off as a cold, yet collected individual, Touka found shelter in both the horrors of her dark past and her constant hunger for flesh in her day job at a café as a waitress which serves other ghouls and as a hangout stop for ghouls. While she grew warmer as her relationship with one Ken Kaneki grew, she’s not without her bestial side, possessing an abject hatred for the CCG after they killed her parents. In a series where everyone seems to be on the edge of insanity and turning into a rampaging, bloodthirsty monster, Touka is one of the few characters genuinely fighting for a chance at a peaceful life.

#8. Riza Hawkeye (Fullmetal Alchemist): Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye is undoubtedly one of the best female anime characters of all time and for good reason, she is truly the perfect soldier. As both an Amestrian State Military’s officer as well as Colonel Roy Mustang’s bodyguard, Riza Hawkeye is a dangerous sharpshooter and firearms specialist. From the outside she can seem strict and even a little cold, but those close to her know that there’s much more to her than her strict no-nonsense attitude, including a courteous nature in the presence of her allies and a desire to protect those she holds dear. Beneath the strict persona is a kind soul who understands the difficulty of carrying a heavy burden and let’s not forget…she’s a true badass in every sense o the word!

#7. Erza Scarlett (Fairy Tail): She went from child slave to arguably one of the strongest mages in all of Fiore. All while battling against S-Class mages, terrifying demons, and even her own psychotic mother, now that’s dedication folks! Forced by her possessed childhood friend to build the Tower of Heaven, she manages to escape her captivity and make her way to Fairy Tail, where she would soon rise to become one of Fairy Tail’s youngest S-Class mages and one of the most truly badass fighters in Fairy Tail’s ranks. With her magical ability known as Re-Quip, she has an unlimited number of weapons and armors at her disposal, each possessing their own devastating abilities. She’s a stoic warrior with a soft heat and a dark past, and you can bet your ass that she’ll fight to defend her Nakama to the bitter end.

#6. Ryuko Matoi (Kill la Kill): Her choice of armor may be a bit on the revealing side but going against this rebel isn’t the smartest idea if you value your life. You’re not likely to find a more stubborn soul in this absolutely whacky series and trust me…NONE of these characters are on the subtle side of things. In search of her father’s killer, Ryuko takes up the sentient life-fiber uniform Senketsu, and openly battles the dictatorship that is the Student Council. Stubborn as hell, Ryuko will always stand up to anyone who gets in her way, no matter how badly the odds are stacked against her. How can you not love someone with that kind of drive!

#5. Saber (Fate/stay night): Before she became a hero in the endless Holy Grail Wars, Saber was actually Artoria Pendragon, known throughout history as King Arthur, the mythical King who united Britain. As the Saber-class servant, Artoria generally tries to hide her identity in battle by using an invisible sword. When pushed, she can brandish Excalibur instead though, a sword she wields with unmatched skill and can do long-range attacks as easily as close-range. With her holy sword, and her “Mana Burst” ability, she is one of the most powerful Servants. Saber is loved by fans worldwide for good reason: she is kind, valiant, and fierce, all traits that make for one divine heroine. None would mind putting the fate of the world in this blonde beauty's hands.

#4. Mikasa Ackerman (Attack on Titan): Attack on Titan's Mikasa is one of those reserved, stoic characters who doesn't speak very often and seems to be stuck in her own head. After all the trauma she’s experienced living under the looming terror of Titans and the carnage she witnessed while part of the Survey Corps, not to mention the brutal murder of her biological parents by criminals, it would be difficult to come out unscathed. Perhaps it’s endurance that is one of Mikasa’s most relatable traits. Despite her often-cynical comments about the world around her, she manages to retain her humanity. Mikasa herself said, “This world is cruel. And yet... so beautiful.” The stereotypical boy-saves-girl gender roles that play out in media are also very much reversed when it comes to her relationship with Eren, which is a refreshing and welcome change of pace to see, though her protectiveness of him seems a little unhealthy at times. On top of everything mentioned, she’s also totally ripped.

#3. Asuka Langley Soryu (Neon Genesis Evangelion): I just couldn’t leave out Neon Genesis Evangelion’s Asuka Langey Soryu from this list of awesome female protagonists. Asuka is a classic anime heroine and remains beloved by fans of the show to this day. Asuka is an American teenage girl who serves as an Eva pilot for the Evangelion Project and pilots the Evangelion Unit-02. Asuka was raised in Germany and often swears in German. She was a child prodigy with a college degree at only fourteen years old, but definitely has her human flaws. She has a temper and is obsessed with being the best at everything she does. Despite these flaws, Asuka is hilarious in her own way and has the kind of confidence and pride you rarely see in a young girl. She knows she can do her job well and isn't afraid to tell you about it. Asuka is relatable in that she is stubborn and often has a hard time properly expressing her feelings and vulnerability to others. Her eventual nervous breakdown shines a light on her humanity-- she is not a perfect person and she is still a child forced to do a job that no child should be forced to do.

#2. Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost in the Shell): Major Motoko Kusanagi is one of the primary protagonists of the popular Ghost in the Shell franchise of manga, films, and animated series. Motoko is a cyborg who works as a field commander for Public Security Section 9 on the Japanese National Public Safety Commission. Motoko is a very physically strong and incredibly intellectual who that is quick-witted and an excellent hacker. But put a firearm in her hand, and she’s especially deadly. As a child, Motoko was comatose following an airplane accident. After her health began to steadily decline, her consciousness was put into a  "full-body prosthesis,” an augmented-cybernetic human body. Motoko causes us to question exactly what makes us human. She is an emotional, stoic, strong woman who fights for the citizens she protects, yet she lives inside an artificial body. But her greatest use is as a platform to speak on the nature of humanity in a technological age. She's a human mind that has been stuck in an artificial body since childhood, and her life and trials bring up the age-old question, "What does it mean to be human?"

#1. Usagi Tsukino (Sailor Moon): You really can’t have a list of awesome female protagonists without including everyone’s favorite schoolgirl superhero: Usagi Tsukino from Sailor Moon. Usagi is the embodiment of an empowering female in anime in her fearless display of conventional femininity without any implied weakness. Usagi is your typical teenage girl who is all about her friends, food, and cute things, while simultaneously being a badass heroine who cleanses the streets of evil. In the original manga and anime, Usagi was portrayed as reluctant to be a superhero and would often run away from fights and be a crybaby. However, through her careful character development, Usagi becomes a brave, reliable, and confident person who cares deeply for her friends. She becomes a better version of herself without stereotypically “shedding” her girliness. Instead, her femininity becomes a defining feature of hers, deconstructing the idea that being girly makes you weak. On the contrary, Usagi’s girliness makes her funny, relatable, and a good role model for young girls. Usagi set the template for a generation of female heroines for generations to come, and it’s for that reason why she’s well-deserving of my #1 ranking on my list.

So that's my updated list, what did you guys think about it? Love it, hated it? Go on and tell me what you think and let me know who your favorite anime heroines are. See you soon!

Deviantart: https://www.deviantart.com/darkchild316

[cela-astral-projection]

"You sent for me, My Lord?" Aedan asked as he stood just inside the bedroom vestibule. He fought to keep his face impassive as the smell of stale perspiration struck him. The gauzy, white curtains obscured Lucio from view. The room was dimly lit and eerie as whisps of smoke crept through.

"Yes, Captain," Lucio croaked as he sat up. No small effort in his weakened state. Aedan saw the silhouette of him as Lucio pushed himself up and rushed to his side. Aedan fought to keep his face impassive as his gaze fell on Lucio. This was a man at death's door. But, even as vain as Aedan knew Lucio to be, he was pliant enough to allow Aedan to assist him.

After a few minutes of adjusting pillows to keep Lucio propped upright, Aedan sat at the bedside, allowing Lucio to catch his breath from the seemingly minimal exertion. Lucio's shirt hung open, and Aedan could see how badly he had atrophied. Aedan saw a growing spot of red at his shoulder, where the prosthesis that he still insisted on wearing had torn the tissue paper-like flesh.

When Lucio got his bearings, he opened his bloodshot eyes to stare at Aedan, and managed a weak smile, and tilted his head toward the bottle on the bedside table. "Old times sake?"

Aedan followed his gaze and pulled a face immediately. He knew that alcohol -- hideously bitter and wormwood infused -- absinthe sans Green Fairy. It had always given Lucio great pleasure to watch his men wither and writhe around the campfire. Aedan swore under his breath and turned back to Lucio.

"Come on, don't deny a dying man one of his last wishes," Lucio said. His rasping tone was pitiable, but the smug, shit-eating grin was dazzling as ever.

"Lucio, that's the thing that's gonna put you in the grave once and for all." Aedan countered with dark humor. Lucio barked a laugh.

"Alright, then let's put me out of my misery." Lucio teased in challenge. "Pour a round for both of us."

Aedan sighed, shaking his head reluctantly as he picked up the bottle.

"Oh, swirl it a bit. This is...a special brew. Just for you." Lucio interrupted as Aedan's fingers struck the glass. Aedan looked back at him with an incredulous stare, eyebrow raised.

"Special, how?" he questioned, picking up the bottle and swirling the amber liquid as requested. Glittering, red sediment whirled up in a hurricane, then dispersed out unnaturally. Aedan's brow pinched in concern.

"It's going to suck a lot more than it usually does," Lucio replied, though there was less mirth in it when he, too, saw the strange, sparkling cloud. He audibly swallowed, as if reconsidering, then steeled himself.

Aedan grudgingly poured the drinks and doled them out. Both men sat staring at the odd, strangely shimmering crimson fluid, then between one another. Lucio's bravado seemed to have gone out of him.

"I think...the longer we think about it, the harder it's going to be," Aedan said finally, and Lucio nodded. "Count of three?"

They simultaneously ticked off the numbers, then knocked back the noxious concoction. The effect took a moment to settle in, sending both men spluttering and coughing viciously. It was intensely astringent and herbaceous in the cruelest of ways, with a burn that lingered on the tongue long after the liquid passed down the gullet.

When they were both recovered, Aedan stood and went to the small bar tray that sat, dusty and abandoned in the corner, pouring a snifter of brandy for both of them.

"That was fucking vile," Aedan croaked before taking a swallow of the comparatively sweet liquid, letting it linger on his tongue before swallowing. "Hope it was worth it."

Lucio gave a weak half-shrug before imbibing. "We'll see, I suppose."

Aedan didn't give his words much thought, still caught up in the unpleasantness of the sensation. They sat in companionable silence, but after a while, he felt the weight of an almost expectant gaze. Silver eyes met silver.

"Did you just bring me here to torture me, or was there something else, Lu?" Aedan implored gently. This man who had been his friend. Their relationship had been strained -- Lucio, locked away here, embroiled in death for so long, but never succumbing, while so many others fell in the city and palace below. As the Captain of the Guard, his heart had been with the people. It had been easy to dismiss Lucio -- his mishandling and callousness, and then the absence of him. It was easier to forget him.

It was difficult seeing Lucio now. How small he was. How empty. And even now...he just wanted to play like a child. While the world burned around them, he wanted to do shots.

"Jules says that it's close," Lucio said with a somber nod. "Need to say my goodbyes."

"Julian has been saying as much for months," Aedan countered. "And you just keep kicking. So, forgive me if I'm reluctant to throw you on the funeral pyre just yet."

Lucio gave a breathy snort of a laugh. "At least you have a blaze of glory planned for me," he shrugged. "Not exactly pretty enough for a glass coffin, lying in state anymore."

"Your narcissism is failing. Maybe it is the end." Aedan teased, though there was no malice in it. He couldn’t manage to be cruel--it was all that he could do to maintain their playful banter. 

Lucio drew a long breath, then nodded. "I really am just...tying up loose ends. I have one more big party, then I can go in peace."

Aedan hadn't thought of a masquerade. It seemed like such an impossibility, given the current state of things. "You're joking," he said flatly, disbelieving.

"No," Lucio countered, then tilted his head back and forth, relenting. "I mean, Nadia won't let me go to the big party. Even though it is my birthday...she won't give in to my begging. But, I've got something else planned. Just a...family dinner, of sorts."

"Well, I suppose that's an exercise in restraint, knowing you." He said. "Was anyone planning on telling me we were having a full-blown masquerade this year?"

Lucio waved his hand dismissively. "You have enough on your plate. Vulgora will handle the security--"

Aedan hissed his disappointment, "Yeah, that's even more worrying. I hate playing clean up for the Pontifex,"

Lucio lifted his hand to stop him. "Let's not talk business," he said. "I'm just about drunk, and I'm fading fast. I just...I wanted to see my friend. Just the two of us."

His tone struck Aedan's heart, and he softened, falling quiet for a moment. He finished his drink and set the glass down. He rested his hands in his lap, watching Lucio.

"Does it scare you?" Aedan asked quietly, not quite able to meet his gaze.

Lucio inhaled sharply, taking a moment to consider. "Not anymore," he said earnestly. "It did...but you get tired of being scared all the time. Get bored of waiting for it. And everyone else gets bored, too." Lucio shook his head. "I hate being bored. And I hate being boring."

"I don't think you're boring," Aedan said. "You're the furthest thing from it. When you're around, I know...the day is going to be interesting, if nothing else."

Lucio narrowed his eyes at him. "I had to make an appointment with you for you to make time for me," he countered, then shrugged. "It's fine. I get it. I wouldn't wanna hang out here long, either."

Aedan looked stricken, though he could hardly argue. "Maybe I should have come more often, and I'm sorry about that. But...I'm taking up the office you gave me. And I'm doing the best I can. Things are...difficult, now."

"I know," Lucio said. "I couldn't have asked for a better Captain. You are..." He stopped himself, considering his words. "You're kind of perfect. In an obnoxious way."

Aedan laughed loudly, caught off guard by the underhanded compliment. One of the very few Lucio had afforded him in their time. "I'll take the praise," he said with a grin when he recovered from the shock. "And you were like...a peculiar, egotistic older brother. And I love you for it."

Lucio smiled in return. "Exactly that. Brothers. We don't always see eye to eye, but...we're family. And family looks out for one another."

Aedan knew Lucio's track record with family, but the sentiment still struck him as sincere. "And what can I do to look out for you?" He asked.

Lucio's face fell just a bit, and he shook his head in the negative. "No...you've done more for me than you know," he said with finality. "I can't ask for anything more."

Aedan reached out across the bed and touched the cold, metal arm affectionately. "I'm still going to be here, you know? Until the end."

Lucio couldn't quite meet his gaze and swallowed hard. Aedan saw an uncharacteristic glitter of tears forming in his already glassy stare. "Yeah, I know. I know. You're the best brother a guy could ask for."

They remained like that for a while—a simple, familial touch of comfort and peaceful quiet. Lucio broke the silence, reaching over his cold, bony fingers to pat Aedan's much warmer, firmer hand. "I think I need to rest,"

Aedan helped Lucio back into a prone state and sorted his pillows and blankets to Lucio's exacting specifications. He waited patiently until Lucio was settled. It hurt him to go, and from the door, he turned back.

"Hey," he said, "I'm going to miss you."

Lucio scoffed. "Well, you know what they say. The ones we love live on inside us, or some shit."

Aedan lifted an eyebrow and smirked. "You believe that?"

"It's the only hope I'm clinging to at this point," Lucio said soberly, then sighed. "I guess we'll find out soon enough."

Aedan sighed, looking over his shoulder. "Lucio, miracles happen every day. Fuck, you might outlive us all."

"Your lips to the Devil's ears," Lucio said with finality.

When Aedan left, and his footfalls had faded, Lucio searched the candle-lit gloom.

"He took the bait," he said into the darkness, his voice strained with emotion.

"Marvelous," The darkness hissed back—smoke coalescing into a humanoid form. Slight and severe and otherworldly, the Quaestor stepped into the dim candlelight. "You did well, Count."

"Just...tell me that it's going to work," Lucio snapped. "I did everything you asked. The beetle dust...he drank it."

"It will do," Valdemar reassured. "He'll look like every other victim of the plague. He'll feel like every other victim. How delightfully tragic. The young, vibrant Captain of the Guard..."

"Please, stop." Lucio choked. "I know you said it has to be him. I did what you told me I had to do. I just want to know that I didn't kill my best friend for no reason."

Valdemar circled the bed. Long, elegant fingers tented. Amused at his display of emotion. "He is your perfect match. An easy transition..." They crooned spitefully, tilting their head back and forth mockingly. "Such a lovely specimen, the Captain. I do so hate to see him wasted on you."

[callowed]

On the Subject of Wiggles

//I have very specific headcanons about Tyrian’s tail and I wanted to compile them into a post

Firstly, the specific kinds of wiggles. His mannerisms are more catlike than anything resembling a dog’s tail movements, but it’s not a perfect analogy as he is not a cat faunus.

Content/pleased: His tail hangs low, and sways softly. There’s more movement in the joints closer to the tip than any larger sweeping movements further up the tail.

Excited: The end of the tail perks upward and shakes in small, quick, almost twitch-like waves. More reminiscent of a cat’s subtler movements than the wide, more aggressive motions associated with doglike tail wagging.

Antagonistic/confrontational: The tail curves sharply upward, typically resting threateningly by his shoulder. A sort of subconscious [although at times intentional] threat, and a show of force.

Irritated: Wide, angry flicks of the tail from side to side. Larger, more forceful motions than the sort that would denote joy or contentment. If he is trying to hide his irritation, his tail will merely twitch upwards, like it’s about to curl into striking position on instinct, but is stopped.

Enraged: Like irritation, but even more dramatic, with the real risk of someone getting hit or even stung if they stand too close. Additionally, he may make stinging and jabbing motions at the air.

Relaxed: When he is completely relaxed, his tail doesn’t move idly at all, but will absentmindedly wrap around suitable objects nearby. When he’s with someone else, this usually manifests in wrapping his tail around their leg.

Depressed/afraid: Very minimal movements, mostly characterized by the tail drooping very low and hanging close to his body. He may even opt to wrap the tail back around his waist. [Wrapping his tail around his waist doesn’t always mean he is feeling this way though, as he also does it to conceal it in public]

Bored: Fidgety, wobbling motions. You can usually tell when he’s doing it because he’s bored because he will be fidgeting with his hands as well, and there is less of a subconscious rhythm to his movements. He is also known to tap and scrape the stinger against things as a fidget.

And then this section is just for miscellaneous facts

He can control the tail at will, but it moves on his own if he isn’t thinking about it. It can be a very telling sign to indicate how he’s feeling, and although he can will it into holding still, it takes concentration, and if he’s trying to keep his emotions close to the chest for whatever reason he’ll usually just opt to wrap it around his waist.

It is somewhat comforting for him to wrap his tail around his waist, sort of like crossing your arms or curling up into a ball, it feels safer, but it gets cramped and uncomfortable if he holds it there for extended periods of time.

He has feeling on the surface of the entire tail, although he can mostly only sense pressure. However, it is particularly sensitive at the base where it connects to his body and at the rounded part of the telson.

He does molt. It happened more frequently, every few years, when he was younger and growing more rapidly, but his tail does still shed on very rare occasions. It’s a very uncomfortable process that causes him to lose his appetite and act generally more withdrawn than usual. It can last a few hours at best, and a few days at worst. He has been known to try to force it into ending more quickly, damaging the sensitive tissue in the process. The same sort of accommodations that help actual scorpions through their molts also apply to him, things like humidity and giving him his space.

While touching someone with his tail is fine, he needs to trust a person a great deal for him to allow them to touch his tail. People have been known to grab at it and pull on it out of insensitive and invasive curiosity, and there have been those who have tried to remove it from his body entirely. So he’s hesitant to trust others with it. He’s not super keen on being gawked at like a sideshow act anyways, he had more than his fill of that when he was in the circus.

His venom is a potent and deadly neurotoxin that can have a variety of effects depending on the dosage. At its least severe, it will make you feel very weak and light-headed and give you a sharp pain in your abdomen, likely make you nauseous. At its worst, it can paralyze your respiratory system and make breathing very difficult or impossible, cause you to lose motor control, and possibly even hallucinate. Without immediate treatment, even a small amount can cause death within hours.

His tail is his strongest limb, capable of pushing and pulling several times his body weight. He has very precise control over it, but it still isn’t designed for finer detailed tasks like holding small objects. The stinger tends to get in the way of that, so he couldn’t, for example, hold a cup in the same way Sun has in the show.

The venom in his prosthesis is mostly his own, but the production of it is aided by the prosthesis after most of the gland was removed by Ruby. What he produces naturally is also mixed with a synthetic solution to maximize effectiveness while also giving him a larger venom reserve to work with than what he’s be able to produce without aid.

The plates of his prosthesis are attached to his body with pins that run through the carapace. This was a very painstaking procedure but ensures that they won’t slide off in combat or general use. Any less invasive methods ran the risk of coming loose with how aggressively Tyrian uses his tail.

There is a hidden latch mechanism at the end of the tail, underneath a plate that has to be removed with a screwdriver, that allows one to remove the completely mechanical portion. This is mostly for maintenance purposes, but serves as an added bonus for anyone looking to share a bed with him without fear of getting stung in their sleep.