#kills myds

[nomaishuttle]

i want muddy buddies

[dexnutslolz]

they made bloomin onion at outback so you don’t kill yourself

[vazaez]

OH MY GOD!?"#?#"?????

HELLO???

IM GENUINELY TWEAKGIN RIGHT NOW WHAT THFI FUCK

trick or treat?

sorry tazzy mixed with werewolf size difference possessed me that’s my bad

[limowlee7389]

2022: End of Year Drama Challenge

created by @anniedelavoye on twitter

I completely missed this challenge this year, but decided to collect my responses here on tumblr for archiving purposes

01:  First drama completed in 2022: Red Sleeve

02:  Favorite actress discovered in 2022: Go Yoon Jung as Jin Bu Yeon in Alchemy of Souls 2:  Light and Shadow

03:  Favorite actor discovered in 2022: Byun Woo Suk as Poong Woon Ho in 20th Century Girl 

04:  Favorite original song from a 2022 drama

Our Beloved Summer || Kim Kyung Hee || Our Beloved Summer

05:  A visually beautiful 2022 drama: First Love:  Hatsukoi 

06:  A drama you dropped in 2022: Snowdrop

07:  Favorite character of 2022: Kim Tae Ri in Twenty-Five, Twenty-One 

08:  A 2022 drama with an interesting story: My Liberation Notes 

09:  Oldest drama you watched in 2022: Shinsengumi Keppuroku (2011)

10:  Have you rewatched a drama in 2022: No, I didn’t rewatch any dramas this year ...

11:  A drama that kept you on the edge of your seat: Blind

12:  A drama friendship that stole the show: Twenty-Five, Twenty-One

13:  A drama you found boring: Love in Contract

14:  A writer or director that caught your attention: Noh Hee Kyung

I have been meaning to watch a number of her dramas for the longest time. This year I've finally gotten around to completing Dear My Friends,  Live,  It’s Okay, That’s Love, and Our Blues. I am so looking forward to her next masterpiece.

15:  Favorite drama poster of 2022: Silent

16:  Best actress of 2022: Kim Tae Ri in Twenty-Five, Twenty-One

17:  Best actor of 2022: Son Seok Koo in My Liberation Notes 

18:  Standout secondary character of 2022: Jean Mi Do as Jeong Chan Young in Thirty-Nine

19:  A drama that made you laugh: Alchemy of Souls

20:  A drama that made you cry: Our Blues

21:  A drama that was better than you expected: Link:  Eat, Love, Kill 

22:  Shortest drama you completed in 2022: Soundtrack #1 with 4 episodes

23:  Longest drama you completed in 2022: Arthdal Chronicles with 18 episodes in the 1st season

24:  Favorite costumes of 2022: Alchemy of Souls

25:  Sweetest drama of 2022: Our Beloved Summer

26:  Most disappointing drama of 2022: Red Sleeve

27:  A 2022 drama that deserves a shoutout: Thirty-Nine

28:  Something you want to see more in dramas: I want more dramas focused on female protagonists

29:  A 2023 drama you’re excited for: Life 

IU and Park Bo Gum

From what I can tell IU has already confirmed, but we're still waiting for Park Bo Gum to formally sign onto this project. Let's hope that this will be his official return to dramaland.

30:  Was 2022 a good year for dramas? Yes, it was a fabulous year for dramas!

Our Beloved Summer (9/10). Twenty-Five Twenty-One (8/10). Soundtrack #1. Thirty-Nine (9/10). My Liberation Notes (8/10). Our Blues (10/10). Alchemy of Souls (7/10). Extraordinary Attorney Woo (7/10). Blind (8/10). Summer Strike (6/10). 

Shinbun Kisha (7/10). Koisenu Futari (8/10). First Love (7/10).  Silent (8/10). Imawa no Kuni no Alice (8/10). 

31:  Favorite drama of 2022: Our Blues

[asolle]

Click on the link to download or stream Music Music Music fall 2023 episode 8: https://app.box.com/s/pnrbvrnlx3q21xh08hxfuiriy4ev1mq9

Playlist:

Mayer Hawthorne - The Pool Santigold - My Horror/Ushers of the New World 100 Gecs - Hollywood Baby The Beatles - Now and Then Pavement - Gold Soundz Green Day - The American Dream is Killing Me BROCKHAMPTON - MAN ON THE MOON Myd - Let You Speak Kurt Vile - Another Good Year for the Roses Alice Ivy - In My Mind Primus - Groundhog's Day YACHT - Blue on Blue Duran Duran - Hungry like the Wolf The Notorious B.I.G. - Notorious B.I.G. Lol Tolhurst x Budgie x Jacknife Lee - Los Angeles The Rolling Stones - 19th Nervous Breakdown SebastiAn - DOORMAN Pip Blom - Is This Love Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers - Don't Do Me Like That Wet Leg - Wet Dream Quantic - Run Oingo Boing - Dead Man's Party Cherry Glazer - Ready For You Viji - Down The Mystery Lights - Wish That She'd Come Back Neko Case - Deep Red Bells RJD2 - Work The Octopus Project + Black Moth Super Rainbow - Elq Milq Wu-Tang Clean - C.R.E.A.M.

[wroteonedad]

#MOOSIC 6

My little list of songs I’ve been listening to the most this month. (March 2023). Another month of me simply not listening to a vast collection of new works since I've taken the month off writing on hiatus.

(from left to right)

Eartheater - Supersoaker (2019)

Empress Of - Hat Trick (2013)

Myd - The Sun (2017)

Cutting Crew - (I Just) Died In Your Arms (1986)

Charli XCX - Unlock It (Lock It) feat. Kim Petras & Jay Park (2017)

The Garden - Thy Mission feat. Mac DeMarco (2019)

Marina - How To Be A Heartbreaker (2012)

Arlo Parks - Hope (2021)

Jamie xx - KILL DEM (2022)

(it seems I was supposed to publish this about 2 weeks ago and forgot, sorry)

[musicalhitchhiker]

2020 Yılında Yayınlanan Indie, Alternatif ve Psychedelic Müzik Örnekleri - 2. Kısım 2. Bölüm Şarkı Listesi (Ekim-Aralık 2020)

Karen O & Willie Nelson – Under Pressure (Queen & David Bowie Cover), Kevin Morby – US Mail, Khruangbin – Summer Madness (Kool & The Gang Cover), Cass McCombs – Don’t (Just) Vote (Feat. Angel Olsen, Bob Weir, And Noam Chomsky), This Is The Kit – Was Magician, Andrew Bird - Christmas In April, The Weather Station – Robber, Local Natives – Lemon (Feat. Sharon Van Etten), Quarter-Life Crisis – Waterfall (Feat. Hovvdy’s Charlie Martin), Routine - Cady Road, Benny Sings – Rolled Up (Feat. Mac DeMarco), EELS – Anything For Boo, Sharon Van Etten – Let Go, Edith Frost – Little Sign, Bright Eyes – Miracle Of Life (Feat. Phoebe Bridgers), HAERTS – For The Sky (Feat. Grizzly Bear’s Ed Droste), Flyte - I've Got A Girl, Badge Époque Ensemble – Unity (It’s Up To You (Feat. James Baley), OHMME – Miasma, Elvis Costello – Newspaper Pane, Woods - Midnight Moment, Frànçois & The Atlas Mountains – Coucou, Jeff Tweedy – Gwendolyn, Crowded House - Whatever You Want, Small Black – Tampa, Helena Deland – Pale, Tori Handsley - What's In A Tune, Goat Girl – Sad Cowboy, Jake Bugg - All I Need, Maxband – Cut It Loose, Pynch – The Whole World’s Going Crazy (For Love), Mdou Moctar – Chismiten, Fuzz – Spit, King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard – Automation, Psychedelic Porn Crumpets - Tally-Ho, Osees – Weird And Wasted Connection, Nilüfer Yanya – Crash, The Kills – Raise Me (Demo), Bleached – Stupid Boys, Wild Pink – The Shining But Tropical, RINSE – Back Into Your Arms (Feat. Hatchie), Alfie Templeman - Forever Isn't Long Enough, Duo - Don’t Judge, Jesse Kivel – Northside, Todd Rundgren & Rivers Cuomo - Down With The Ship, Portugal. The Man – Who’s Gonna Stop Me (Feat. “Weird Al” Yankovic), Myd – Moving Men (Feat. Mac DeMarco), Stranded – Post-Meridian, Working Men's Club – Valleys, Liam Gallagher – All You’re Dreaming Of, Phoebe Bridgers – If We Make It Through December (Merle Haggard Cover), Matt Sweeney & Bonnie ‘Prince’ Billy – Make Worry For Me, Fake Laugh & Tarquin - Meaningless Things, The Antlers – It Is What It Is, Teenage Fanclub – Home, Balthazar - You Won't Come Around, Babe Rainbow – Zeitgeist, Peter Bjorn And John – Season Of Defiance, Melin Melyn – Rebecca, Hey Elbow - Don't Speak (No Doubt Cover), Steady Holiday – Tangerine, Cloud Nothings – The Spirit Of, Wolfgang Van Halen (Mammoth WVH) – Distance, The Smashing Pumpkins – Ramona, Shame – Water In The Well, Yard Act – Peanuts, Speed Stick – Knots (Feat. Kelley Deal), Population II – Introspection, Mogwai – Dry Fantasy, Foo Fighters – Shame Shame, TV People – String, Kimono Drag Queens – Hunters, Oscar Lang - Antidote To Being Bored, The Notwist – Where You Find Me, Stranded – Cherry Fortune, Arab Strap – Compersion Pt. 1, Nation Of Language – A Different Kind Of Life, Kiwi Jr. – Cooler Returns, Wolf & Moon - While We Ride, Baio – What Do You Say When I’m Not There?, Alfie Templeman – Shady, KOKOROKO - Baba Ayoola, The Jungle Giants - In Her Eyes, Muzz - Fade Into You (Mazzy Star Cover), Anna Burch – Your Heart May Be Heavy, Sun June – Bad Girl, Babe Rainbow - The Wind, Cory Hanson – Paper Fog, Bill Callahan & Bonnie “Prince” Billy – I Love You (Jerry Jeff Walker Cover) (Feat. David Pajo), Another Sky - Sun Seeker, The Besnard Lakes – Feuds With Guns, Moontype – Ferry, Night Beats - That's All You Got (feat. Robert Levon Been), U.S. Girls – Santa Stay Home, Steve Earle – Champagne Corolla (Justin Townes Earle Cover), The Native – Frontline, Blanketman – Harold, Lande Hekt – December, Why Don’t We - Slow Down, Cherry Glazerr – Rabbit Hole, King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard – If Not Now, Then When?, Goat Girl – The Crack, Another Michael – I Know You’re Wrong, Lost Horizons – Every Beat That Passed (Feat. Kavi Kwai), Ringo Starr - Here’s To The Nights, The Chills – You’re Immortal, The Voidz – Alien Crime Lord, Elvis Costello & Iggy Pop – No Flag (En Français)

[easyrevenge]

thank you for the tag @tequilatuesdays4all 🖤 luv u

are you staying home from work/school? yeah. i was let go from my job bc of the pandemic so currently unemployed until business starts back up. i miss my coworkers and regular lushies 🥺

if you’re staying home, who’s there with you? my family ! i only want to strangle them 83% of the time.

are you a homebody? i would say like 60/40. i really like going out and doing things; parks, shows, movies, bars, and breweries etc. buuut i socially exhaust quickly so i also deeply enjoy being home.

what movies have you watched recently? even with all this free time i haven’t been able to focus on watching anything. if i start a movie, i never finish it. :/

what shows are you watching? same situation as above.

an event that you were looking forward to that got cancelled? well, fuck lol. i was literally supposed to be on an airplane to go see @declanisms right fucking now so that we could hang all weekend and then go see joyce manor for the (third time) within the same week soooo yeah

what music are you listening to? post malone, soft kill, the quarantine playlist oyb and i made, the myd/iym playlist, if you’re too shy by the 1975

what are you reading? (i love that my answer is exactly the same as yours, mel!) started rereading the raven cycle series ! it’s like a warm hug with lots of boy tears & strong female characters

what are you doing for self-care? cooking a lot, yoga, lots of baths, rereading trc, animal crossing, started a veggie & herb garden idk man

isolation check in time for @sociallyextraneous @franciswilloughby & whoever else wants to! (: tag me so i can see em 💕

[onestowatch]

spill tab Propels Her Boundary-Pushing Vision Forward on ‘Bonnie’

Photo: Jade Sadler

French-Korean alt-pop star in the making spill tab, née Claire Chicha, harnesses the potential of digital collaboration and a unique sense of relatability in her sophomore EP Bonnie. Showing off her creative range and sonic versatility with the hyperpop highs of "Pistolwhip" and the dreamy psych-rock influenced Gus Dapperton-assisted "Velcro,” the genre-shifting artist soaks up her influences to create a platter of anti-pop that sparks all the senses.

The record's opener, "Pistolwhip," according to the LA-via-Bangkok artist, is about going through something emotionally painful and the dichotomy of being angry but also being vulnerable. “I wanted to imagine what it'd be like in the head of someone who's just finding out they're being cheated on,” said the singer to Genius. “They're vacillating between pure rage and just wanting to hold on 'cause they love that person so deeply, and then the underlying issues of that relationship sort of start to show in the second verse. It's just a descent into madness, I guess.” The track builds into a cacophony of distortion that brews a genuinely frantic, unsettling feeling as she deals with the contrasting experiences of betrayal.

Listeners then travel to the dreamy world of "en quatre." Written in Paris with her producers Myd and marinelli, the French-language song starts off soft and slow, highlighting spill tab's silky smooth vocals. As it progresses, the soothing track blends with elements of twinkling piano, layered breathy harmonies, and pulsing beats that tie the whole piece together.

"Anybody Else" is a perfect love song. It's short, sweet, and straight to the point, filled with playful introspection and sprinkled with a relatable lo-fi intro and outro. She shamelessly expresses her love without openly saying I love you, all while lightheartedly singing saccharine lines like, "I like you, don't like anybody else/And I crave you, I will keep you to myself." 

Next is the most asymmetrical track on the record, "Indecisive." With its fast-paced melody, spitfire lyrics, and vocals, the track is an inventive, tongue-twister that keeps listeners on their toes. The addition of rapper Tommy Genesis elevates the tune into something sharp, funky, and dynamically layered in rich sonic textures. In an interview with NME, the singer shared, "We've never met in person! When [producer] David [Marinelli] and I started making the song, we realized that we needed a fast rap section – and there was no way in hell that I was going to be doing that part. I've been a fan of Tommy for ages, and I really wanted a woman of color to be on the track – that was really important to me. Over Instagram DMs, we formed the basic outline of what she and I wanted to do. One day we'll hang out; this is the first collaboration where I haven't spent time with the artist. She bodied her verse though!"

"Grade A" explores the fear of being unable to meet romantic expectations. High-energy and eccentric, Chicha softly sings, "I'll never be your grade A chase/With the perfect face like some perfect prey" before being engulfed with a heavy drum and bass-indebted beat. The track especially shines when fellow indie-pop singer-songwriter JAWNY takes the mic and plays the role of a pleasing antagonist to spill tab's sonic banter. He cheekily quips, "Lady, you driving me crazy, why you gotta frame me?"

Bonnie's closing track, "Velcro," is a sonic examination of emotions, focusing in on loneliness and anxiety. spill tab shares with listeners their vulnerability in lines like, “Cornered by thought of getting crushed by the ceiling, I look down, but it didn't kill me,” and “Oh, no, I'm so bad at going solo, I'm attachеd to being 'motional, Catching onto shit like velcro...” “It felt incredibly easy and natural working with Gus,” she shared with DIY. “.. it's such a positive experience because you can tell he just really wants to service the song and support the other person in the room. He's a very selfless collaborator, and I'm so proud and excited for this one."

Bonnie is a collection rife with diversity and experimental depth, foreshadowing a promising future for the boundary-pushing pop artist. spill tab certainly makes her mark, layering momentum carefully and using the freshness of collaboration to drive the record forward.

Listen to Bonnie below:

[pookystolenkissworld]

#radioprogram #broadcasting #playlist #music #listening #pop #rock #indie #live #cool #catradioactive #series #funforaday #hipster #shoegazer #anything #modernrock #musicoftheweek #newrealease #varieties Cat Radioactive by DJ Wasana Wirachartplee (DJ Ziggy) on every Saturday at 22:00 - 24:00 hrs. (+07:00 GMT) at www.thisiscat.com<http://www.thisiscat.com> DJ Wasana Wirachartplee’s Facebook https://www.facebook.com/wasana.wirachartplee Catradioactive 6 February 21: Mute Choir - Election Season Front Line Assembly - Barbarians Stats - Come With Me A Tale Of Golden Keys - All Of This NYIKO - Ghost In Your Dreams Stomp Talk Modstone - Untitled Sulk - Meadow Fawning - Wait Cigarettes For Breakfast - Wait Outside - Woodland Cemetery Monowhales - BL/FF (Fake Friends) Fox Face - Vessels Kiwi Jr. - Cooler Returns Famous - Nice While It Lasted Baby Strange - More! More! More! Tourists - Masquerade Pool Holograph - Deliverance Harvard Of The South - Face the Fears Moon Taxi - One Step Away Public Body - Table Manners Teen Creeps - Forever Total Drag -Honey Dutch Criminal Record - 00's Nostalgia Blackout Orchestra - Siren Song The Drives - All This Boredom Charming Liars - In The Reflection Of Blood Codist - Flotation Device Beverly Kills - Trophy Hunt Mermaid in China - The View Subterranean https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FSfiKnTxz1k&list=PLU62MFne4NxDYmZT52_0FRS-_eTeGGlgD Fun for a day 210: Khruangbin - Dearest Alfred Rhye - Come In Closer Nilufer Yanya - Same Damn Luck Little Dragon & Moses Sumney - The Other Lover FKA twigs, Headie One, Fred again.. - Don't Judge Me serpentwithfeet - Fellowship Julien Baker - Hardline Men I Trust - Lucky Sue Molly Burch - Emotion feat. Wild Nothing Caroline Polachek - Breathless Arlo Parks - Caroline Myd - Moving Men (feat. Mac DeMarco) Dayglow - Close to You Marina - Man's World Beach Bunny - Blame Game Gerry Cinnamon - Ghost Low Hum - Another Day Caamp - Officer of Love The Marías - Care For You Claud - Soft Spot Laurel - Appetite daily life of a daydreamer & Su Lee - Wide Awake Tune-Yards - hold yourself The Weather Station - Atlantic https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ths1EYXLBhw&list=PLU62MFne4NxCc5e6tbL1efu2kLr61DQ_L https://www.instagram.com/p/CK-YORqpPGd/?igshid=1ho1ec61zfghg

[muchpreferredcustomers]

FAVORITE VIDEOS OF 2020

In rough chronological order of release date. Only one video per principal artist is permitted in the list. This list is canonical - you may refer to it with confidence.

CamelPhat, Jem Cooke - Rabbit Hole  TOKiMONSTA feat. EARTHGANG - Fried For The Night  Greg Dulli - Pantomima  Daði Freyr (Daði & Gagnamagnið) – Think About Things  Lewis OfMan - Attitude  MEUTE - What Else Is There? (Röyksopp Rework)  Noga Erez feat. Reo Cragun & ROUSSO - Views  Four Tet - Baby  PVRIS - Dead Weight  Ana Tijoux - Antifa Dance Piero Pirupa - Braindead (Heroin Kills) L'Impératrice - FOU  Rone - Ginkgo Biloba  Skott - Talk About Me  Remi Wolf - Photo ID  Arca - Nonbinary  Sonic Boom - Things Like This (A Little Bit Deeper)  Bottler - Weekend  EARTHGANG feat. Malik - Fields  Myd - Together We Stand  Jónsi – Swill  Disclosure, Aminé, slowthai - My High  CloZee - Heya  deadmau5 & The Neptunes - Pomegranate  Zoé - Fiebre  Dua Lipa - Hallucinate  The Avalanches feat. Jamie xx, Neneh Cherry, CLYPSO - Wherever You Go  _juno - _bcn626 (Versión Censurada)  Flying Lotus - Remind U  Elohim - I’m Lost  FKA twigs - Sad Day Oneohtrix Point Never - Long Road Home  Duck Sauce - Mesmerize  Max Cooper - Spike  Tame Impala - Breathe Deeper 

For reference purposes only:

Favorite videos of 2019 Favorite videos of 2018 Favorite videos of 2017 Favorite videos of 2016 Favorite videos of 2015 Favorite videos of 2014 Favorite videos of 2006-2013

No “favorite videos of 2005” or earlier exists because of course music videos had not been invented yet.

[jeffgoldblumsmulletinthe90s]

Tagged by @awhawke Rules: We’re snooping on your playlist. Set your entire music library on shuffle and report the first 10 songs that pop up. Then choose 10 victims. 1. Lights in the Sky - Nine Inch Nails 2. Far Away - Feed Me & Kill The Noise 3. Testarossa (SebastiAn remix) - Kavinsky 4. March of the Pigs - Nine Inch Nails 5. Xen - Arca 6. The Outsider - Jamaica 7. Rock 'N' Roll (Will Take You To The Mountain) - Skrillex 8. Thumbs Up (For Rock N' Roll) (Kill the Noise remix) - Feed Me & Kill the Noise 9. The Sun - Myd 10. The Heart of Me - Miike Snow Tagging @martythegirl @posttentiousss and @iamonlydancing

[mingi-bubu]

Watch “Love O2O” with Me!

Episode 25

oh my god we have like what

five episodes levt???

omg

anyways

we open again with the last seconds of the previouss how

as the ever lovely mark lee would say, lezgeddit

hmmmm

i dont like where this seems to be heading

if the fucking cousin shows up while weiwei is there im going to be

pissed

nooooo

i do not like this

stop being a fucking creep kyle

take no for an answer

she said oh hell no bitch

stop being such a fucking creep jesus

oh snap he did not jsut insult my boys

get fucked kyle

hahahahaha

get wreckdt

oh god no

ajdlfkjasd its almost as if theyre the same person

HALF OF THE CLSOET UGH

HE HAS NO CONFIDENCE IN HIS SELF CONTROL I FUCKIGN CANNOT

oh that cant be good

oh no the fish!

whos place

OH NO HIS PARENTS’ PLACE

yoooo thats a sick fucking mop thing

she really said youd sleep in the offic ebut lets takl about it

he said oops i stay

he looks so snuggly im *smsiling with three hearts emoji*

SEVERAL DECADES FROM NOW OMG SHUGT UPP

coffeee!!!! only character i care about!

im so sick of this guy jfc

coffee is the cutest!

let him rot

you deserve better

ice & fire that place looks dope

i gotta lookit up

i wonder what he’s gonna do

theyre really misreading everything huh

DAMN HE REALLY CAME OUT NO HOLDS BARRED

OH SHIT WOW

hard to look badass on a fuckin vespa bud

afkasl i love his rice cooker so much

dude can you fucking chill???

the way nai is just looking at the screen

THE SMIRK BITCH IM FUCKING WEAK

what do you think that means??

i am so sick of this man

yeah yeah yeah stop typing bud

OH

MY

GOD

kill the rat man

fakfjashd he just confessed to nai instead im so weak

how many times do you think that the coffee travel cup fell over when they were filming?

cute cute cute

SHE CALLED HIM BAOBEI OH MY GOD

OH MY GOD OH MYD ADFIJAOIWH

THEYRE SO FUCKING CTHE SCHEECKAKDFJA

THE HEADBUMBPEAIJHFOAJK

I WANT WHAT THEY HAVE

I AM SICK OF THIS MAN

what is glasses doing now

i knew he was meeting with zhenyi

what papers

that is

extortion

why not talk to nai first about what is going on???

just give them fake information

its not like he’d know what youre talking about

why does this mean so much to them?

rat man

why do they be shouting tthough

stop being rat men im sick of this shit kyle

the guy at his table at the end with the glasses???  im in love with him

god hes kind of a hmmmm how to say

rat bastard?

YAY SEPTEMBER HASNT HAD SCREEN TIME IN FOREVER

thighs

ooooohhh kodak be buying things

homes

???

al;dfkjasdl;kfjasdklfj

THEYRE SO DRAMATIC IM SO IN LOVE WITHH HIM

THE WAY HE HIDES UNDER THE DESK AND IMMEDIATELY PROTECTS KODAK I LOVE IT

LKAJDSFL;KAJSDKFASKJRARKLAEWI THE KEYBOARD

i do not care about the plot i just want to see the #squad and weinai

and we reache the end of this episode!

thank you for reading!!!

stay safe and stay healthy <333

[sheismyd]

Saying Goodbye to Beyoncé

… & this is the first time in 16 years that we don’t get to celebrate our dog Beyoncé’s birthday with her. That’s right, it would’ve been my girl’s sweet 16 today & those that know me know I would’ve went all out for my baby. LOL! It has only been two short months since we had her euthanized & it has not been easy for any of us. But I thought, what better day than today to share the story of our last days with her.

After having Beyoncé as part of our family for so many years it was devastating when we found out the tough decision we would be faced with. On Tuesday December 10thBeyoncé kept my parents up all night with a hoarse cough that developed out of nowhere. The next day they took her to the vet to figure out what was going on. Later that evening my mom broke the horrible news to me; Beyoncé had terminal lung cancer. The veterinarian was unable to tell us how long the cancer had been present but it had progressed to the point where there was nothing they could do. The doctors wanted us to closely observe her quality of life, but assured us that as long as she was eating, going outside to use the bathroom, & sleeping, that she was okay. They also provided medication to help the coughing subside, alleviate the pain, & overall help her be as comfortable as possible. Unfortunately, the medication didn’t help at all.

Of course being 15 years old, there were certain things she was unable to do anymore. For example, she couldn’t jump onto high surfaces and her hearing wasn’t as good. However, she was still a happy & healthy dog until cancer took over. It’s like I watched her health decline drastically in just one day. Her cough got worse, she was shivering, collapsing, and she was not sleeping at all. She just paced back & forth throughout the house coughing all day & night. The vet explained what Beyoncé was feeling as if there was something caught in her throat & her coughing was an attempt to get it out, which wasn’t going to happen. I can only imagine how uncomfortable she must’ve been.

My worst nightmare had become reality. I knew the day would come when Beyoncé would no longer be with us, but I always hoped she’d pass away peacefully in her sleep because the thought of euthanasia was so awful to me. I just couldn’t fathom taking my pet that I loved so much to a vet and letting them technically, kill her. It always seemed like betrayal to me & in a sense like I’d be giving up on my pet. I also didn’t think I was strong enough to do something like that.

It got to the point where I could see the pain in my baby’s eyes & it was heart breaking to see her suffering like that. With what Beyoncé’s condition had become it only took us one day to decide we needed to put her to rest. I did give my dad some push back on the date because I wanted a few more days with her, but we settled on taking her the following day, Friday December 13th. After all, putting it off would’ve only extended her suffering & increased my anxiety. She wasn’t sleeping, we weren’t sleeping, & she was in a lot of pain. The overwhelming feeling of not wanting her to suffer quickly surpassed my selfish feelings of not wanting to have her put down.

What an agonizing day Friday December 13thwas. As soon as I opened my eyes that morning I was overwhelmed with emotions. I gave myself a few minutes to get it all out before I started my day. A part of me wished she would’ve just passed in her sleep that night so I wouldn’t have to go through with this. But I had to get up & take Beyoncé for what would be our last walk together. Before heading to work my mom & I hugged each other tightly with Beyoncé in our arms for a few minutes. I tried to keep myself busy & distracted at work but I was unsuccessful. All I could think about was what I had to do when I got off. I fought back tears all day, but as soon as I exited the building I cried uncontrollably. When I pulled up to the house my dad opened the front door & their Beyoncé was standing in the doorway looking at me. On a normal day she would’ve took off running to me. The house already felt different. There was now this somber aura that filled our home. I must’ve sat in my bed for an hour holding Beyoncé, rocking her back & forth crying out loud. Then I walked around the entire house multiple times while holding her. I always imagined it being hard to put a pet to sleep but whatever I pictured, what I was feeling was 10 times worse.

On a positive note, the doctors at the veterinarian handled my family & Beyoncé with such care. I’m sure they put animals to sleep daily, it’s part of their job but they didn’t treat it as if it was just another task. They showed so much empathy & assured us that we were doing the right thing for Beyoncé. Better to have her put to sleep peacefully rather than letting her continue to suffer or worse, die gasping for air struggling to breathe. All thoughts of doubt & betrayal vanished & they made me realize this was our final act of love. They thoroughly explained the euthanasia process & let us have our last moments with her. I left the room because I didn’t want my last memory to be of her being put to sleep, but my mom & dad stayed in the room to see her take her last breath. They told me she just closed her eyes & went to sleep. After the process was complete, we brought Beyoncé back home & buried her on the side of the house by my room.

Although this continues to be an emotional journey, my family & I are adjusting to our new normal. We definitely still have our sad moments but we try to look at pictures & videos to remind us of the good times. Man, did that girl give us some good laughs. Life must go on but we will always love Beyoncé & we’ll never forget the paw prints she left on our hearts. Happy Sweet 16 Beyoncé & Happy 1stBirthday in heaven.

And for anyone who is having a hard time dealing with the loss of a pet, you are not alone. Many people can’t comprehend why losing a pet is such an emotional thing for some, but it’s normal. Don’t let anyone make you feel like you shouldn’t grieve your animal. After all we spend so much time with them & they become part of our families. Take your time & acknowledge your feelings so you can heal no matter what anyone says or thinks.

- MYD

[asolle]

Click the link to stream or download Music Music Music spring 2023 episode 3: https://app.box.com/s/rx334tngiiamq81l7sy96hvl5tiniw13

Playlist:

SZA - Kill Bill MSTRKRFT - So Deep The Troggs - Wild Thing Myd - Let You Speak Hot Hot Heat - Bandages Aesop Rock and Blockhead - Pumpkin Seeds Leon Bridges - Better Man/Motorbike Little Simz - X Subsonic Eye - Aquarius Kepi and Friends - Since You're Gone Montell Jordan - This is How We Do It Metronomy x Panic Shack - It's Good to Be Back Metronomy x Katy J Pearson - Love Factory Vampire Weekend - A-Punk Tricky - Ponderosa Scott McMicken and the EVER-EXPANDING - What About Now/Another One Dr. Dog - Keep a Friend MGMT - Time to Pretend/Electric Feel MIA - Paper Planes Radiohead - Bodysnatchers Sia - The Girl You Lost to Cocaine The White Stripes - I'm Slowly Turning Into You Modest Mouse - Dashboard Sharon Jones and the Dap Kings - 100 Days, 100 Nights Thao and the Get Down Stay Down - Beat (Health, Life and Fire) The Shins - Australia Interpol - No I in Threesome The Good, the Bad, and the Queen - Herculean

[nouvellepeinture]

Nouvelle Peinture - New music - October 2017

Everything Is Recorded - Show Love (Feat. Syd & Sampha) BADBADNOTGOOD - I Don't Know (Feat. Samuel T. Herring) Smokepurpp - To The Moon Young Thug - Killed Before Official Audio Jonti - Sleeping and Falling boy pablo - Everytime Ty Dolla $ign - Dawsin's Breek ft. Jeremih A Boogie Wit Da Hoodie - Say A' Kekra - Intermission Myd - The Sun Brent Faiyaz - Gang Over Luv Sébastien Tellier - Lovely Blonde Porches - Country IDK - MrsLynch, Your Son Is The Devil Fever Ray - To The Moon And Back