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cherrylng · 3 months ago

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Muse interview - Matt Bellamy [CROSSBEAT (March 2000)]

“My most fundamental motivation for going into music was to give eternal life to human emotions.”

Muse, a trio of explosive lyricists who mix cross-cultural blood with modern sensibilities, have finally landed in Japan! Matthew Bellamy's spirituality, the heart of a band that respects Radiohead but aims to be ‘somewhere different’. Interview: Sumi Imai

“I think music is best listened to when you're alone. Because it's music that makes you connect with something beyond the material.”

Muse, who hail from Devon in south-west England, were discovered by Maverick in the US as ‘promising newcomers’ and signed independently, followed by individual record deals in five countries around the world, including the UK, Germany, France and Japan, making their debut on an international scale not seen in recent years. Now, Muse is coming to Japan! At just 21 years of age, their first album ‘Showbiz’ strikes the listener's soul raw with instinctively stirring dramatic sounds and melancholy melodies. Matthew's (vocals/guitar/keyboards and lyrics/composition) singing, which is sensitive yet expresses emotions that seem to rise from within, dark, edgy and loud guitars, and melancholic and beautiful melodies have often led to them being described as ‘the three-piece Radiohead of the new millennium’, but of course they are no mere followers. Their music has the shadowy danger and tension of Radiohead, the dynamism, drive and gloss of Mansun (for the second album) and the bare intensity of Nirvana…… They create a unique "Muse world" by weaving in exotic elements (including flamenco-style guitar!). At the age of 14, Matthew joined the band of his secondary school classmate Dominic (drums). Two years later, Chris (bass) joined the band, which became the original Muse and continues to this day. We caught up with Matthew after he had been back home for a while, amidst a packed schedule of European tour dates.

You have always liked Spanish and South American music, as well as classical and choir music. I think that this diversity of musical influences is what sets Muse apart musically from other bands. 「Yes, that's true. Since I was a kid, I grew up listening to all kinds of music, regardless of genre. When I first learnt to play guitar, it was blues and slide guitar, and I started to get into rock when I was 13 or 14. When I graduated from high school, at the age of 17, I spent about four months travelling around Europe on holiday. I wanted to learn a lot of guitar music there that I wasn't used to hearing before. I went to Greece and Italy just to listen to the different kinds of folk music from different places. It was an experience that opened my eyes to the possibilities of what I could do with the guitar. I also used to play classical music like Rachmaninoff and Chopin on the piano. So maybe I'm trying to fuse all kinds of music.」

You started your first band at the age of 12, and it all started around the same time (1991 or 1992?). Was it grunge or something like that? 「Oh, no, no (laughs), it was actually a jazz-ish band.」

Oh, really? 「I was playing the piano in a boogie-woogie or rock ‘n’ roll kind of way. Then I started playing electric guitar and joined Dom's (Dominic) band. His band was so cool at school, everyone wanted to be in it (laughs).」

Wow (laughs). I heard that they played songs by Mega City Four and Senseless Things. 「Yeah, Dom's band used to play that kind of stuff, and we used to cover other British indie bands like Ned's Atomic Dustbin and Wedding Present. I started learning those songs when I joined that band.」

I see. By the way, you said, "The only bands that really mattered in the 90s were Nirvana and Radiohead during 'The Bends' era. What made these two bands stand out was their pure vulnerability in exposing themselves and innovation". You seem to be obsessed with ‘innovation’, but if there was a ‘new sound’ that Muse could present to the current scene, what would it be? 「Well, I'm not very good at describing what I do in words (laughs). But…… When I mentioned Nirvana and Radiohead, I think I was trying to talk about the ‘guitar music’ they produced. In terms of guitar-based music and its development, from Jimi Hendrix, Elvis, the Beatles and the Who to the Sex Pistols…… I think they're important bands to put in that queue. But yeah, it's hard to talk about ourselves because we're just starting out (laughs), we've got a long way to go.」

So what do you want to create in the future? 「I want to be honest about what I feel at the time. This time I've incorporated classical piano music and organic Spanish elements, but I want to combine these atmospheres in modern rock. There are so many different kinds of music in this world. Music has a long, long history. Different countries have different music. I think it's important to keep an open mind and listen to everything, to get in touch with what's happening in the world, past and present, and to develop what you create.」

I see, I understand. By the way, when UK bands expand into the US, the usual pattern is for them to establish themselves in the UK to some extent, then play small shows in the US…… But you guys are doing a big expansion on your own with your record company in the US. Many of your favourite bands - Nirvana, Primus, Rage, Smashing Pumpkins - are from the US, but do you think success in the US is important for you guys? 「Hmm, it's a challenge for us. It's a big country and I think it takes time to become a thing. The fact that the US music scene/rock music has been so creative for the last five years or so is what I'm really interested in. I think the next couple of years are a good time to bring song-oriented music to the US scene. There's been a bit of an emphasis on heavy metal music over there for a while now. But (success in the US) has never been the most important thing for me. I'd rather be successful in my home country, the UK, than the US.」

I see. But when you went to the US, you were greeted with limousines and champagne, which is unbelievable hospitality for a new British band. 「Hahahahaha (laughs), yeah, yeah.」

When it comes to being treated so well since your debut, do you take it easy and think, "I'll just take what they give me"? Or do you always calmly tell yourself, "Don't get carried away by this. Keep your feet on the ground"? 「Yeah, I don't think we take the situation too seriously. So it's more like ‘enjoy it while you have it’. We know it's all just for the moment, it won't last. We know it's just to make a good impression on us. We know we haven't earned it yet. Anyway, we don't even know if that's what we really want to get. It's just a bit of fun. It's not like I believe life should be like that or anything.」

Hmmm… that's rather cool (laughs). By the way, what ambitions did you have when you were 16, when all three Muse members were together? 「At the time…… I was like, "We're going to be the biggest in the world" (laughs), hahaha. But that kind of thing changes as you get older.」

And now? There are bands like Manics [aka Manic Street Preachers], who made their debut with the enthusiasm of "We're going to be number one in the whole world" (laughs), and then there are bands like Elastica, who say "If we can do what we love, sell 10,000 copies of our albums, and can make a living, that's enough". 「Yeah, it's possible for those two extremes to coexist inside of you. For example, to put it in an extreme way, a part of me thinks, ‘I'm happy just to exist’. Music gives me so much joy that I enjoy just being able to spend time with it, to focus on new ideas and creating something. My main motivation for continuing with music is to keep having the opportunity to create new things and to communicate with other people through it. I think that's the most important thing. There is more than one way to maintain that situation. I think I'd be just as happy if I could just make a living or if I was the most famous person in the world.」

But when we get too big, for example, there are some things we can't control. Like the suffering that fame brings, not to mention the example of Kurt Cobain…… 「Yeah……」

Also, I don't know if you've seen this, but from the Radiohead documentary video— 「Yeah, I've seen about half of it.」

From that you can also get a sense of the kind of madness they put themselves through. Do you have any fear or preparedness for that sort of thing? 「It's easy sometimes to take your situation and everything too seriously. It's easy to get depressed and wallow in self-pity, but I think that's boring. For example, I don't think the situation in that video was actually as bad as it appears on the screen. I think they were deliberately shot to look like they were in a bad situation in order to portray the image they had at the time. I know, I've been on tour for a long time now, and it's actually not that bad, I enjoy it. I mean, I try to enjoy it as much as I can. That's what life is all about. I don't feel the need to dwell on the bad aspects of it, because it's the most enjoyable experience of my life, even though I don't like some of it. I don't think that feeling will ever change.」

One of the unique characteristics of Muse's music is that it is full of deep, intense and real emotions - in the overall sound, in your guitar and piano, and of course in the songs. 'There are many ways that people do and create music - as a means of self-expression, as a means of communication, as a therapeutic role, etc. What is the greatest significance of music for you? 「Well, I guess…… The most fundamental motivation for me towards music was to give eternal life to human emotions. I mean, the feeling that after we die, the feeling remains in the world. That's the first thing, or in other words, I believe in the existence of the soul. Sometimes people can be confused by the body. They feel frustrated by the material world. Art and music express our emotions and show us that there is more to life than material things. Music is a way of connecting with people in a different way beyond the material world.」

You mean a spiritual way? 「Yeah, I think that's probably what it is. I think art exists to express what we feel inside and to communicate with people beyond natural phenomena, if there is such a thing as spirituality. Everyone expresses themselves in different ways, but most of the songs on the first album are about my relationship with the outer material world.」

Hmmm. On a different note, there have been a lot of comparisons to Radiohead, but I was impressed by how you coolly analysed and answered, "Well, I don't mind, I've never really been a fan of Radiohead. If you think about the fact that Thom Yorke was influenced by Jeff Buckley and that our album was produced by John Leckie (who produced ‘The Bends’), it's an understandable comparison." I think there are a lot of bands who, when they're as young as you are, would be very dismissive, but you handle it well, probably because of your own respect for them. 「Yeah, it's certainly partly because of the respect for what they've achieved. And I understand the comparisons for the reasons I've just mentioned. But the comparisons don't mean that we're treated as a copycat band.」

Yes, that's right. When you said that, you also said, ‘But if you see us live, you'll see that Muse is more of a rock band’, 「Yeah, it's just that if you see us live, you can better understand what we actually sound like as a band. On the record we're more experimental, we use different instruments, we sound like a five or six-piece [band], but live it's just the three of us, and I think the emotion hits you harder. And we're definitely from a different generation (to Radiohead)…… So I think we're appealing to a different generation.」

Oh, a different generation…… So what do you actually think of 'OK Computer'? Considering the sound and structure of that album, I thought that what you said earlier meant that yours is a more straightforward and powerful rock. 「I think 'OK Computer' is a good album, I just don't listen to it too intensely. It probably didn't have the same influence on me [as 'The Bends']. Maybe it's partly because I listened to 'The Bends' at a certain time of year that it appealed to me more clearly. I think 'OK Computer' is a good album, but it doesn't resonate with me the way 'The Bends' does. I think it's probably a generational thing, an age thing.」

Oh, I see. Well, this is just my personal impression, but I feel that Radiohead's sound is largely a journey of self-exploration towards inner chaos, while Muse's sound is more outward-oriented with ‘the intention to connect with the listener’. The guitars and singing seem to speak to us. For example, in your live performances, are you conscious of the presence of the listener in that sense? 「Yes, for example, I've loved going to gigs since I was a kid, and the most exciting thing was when a singer would perform to me as if they were talking to me. I'm very conscious of people as 'individuals', not as a ‘crowd’, and I try to be conscious of that. I try to imagine that I'm part of the audience, and I try to put myself in their shoes. I think music, especially albums, are best listened to when you are alone. Because music makes you feel you are not alone and connects you to something beyond the material. I don't think Muse's music is appropriate to play when you're all gathered at a friend's house having a drink and having a good time. I don't think it's the right music for that kind of background music. I think it's more the kind of music that you can listen to when you're alone and feel something different…… I mean, I hope so (laughs).」

Translator's Note: The earliest Muse interviews that can be found in Crossbeat and Rockin'On were all released on their March 2000 issues, with INROCK only releasing theirs on April 2000. But out of three, I think Crossbeat has the best early interview by far, thanks to how good of a journalist Sumi Imai is. Their interviews just reveals Matt and his bandmates in a way that most other western music magazines and newspapers don't.

Or it's just because Japanese interviews tend to reveal the conversation of questions and answers as it was recorded back then, so there's no backfilling of sorts at all.

#Matt Bellamy #Dom Howard #Chris Wolstenholme #Muse #Muse band #Showbiz era #my scan #translation #interview #CROSSBEAT #CROSSBEAT March 2000

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galindathrop · 6 months ago

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Eras Tour Setlist and Surprise/Secret Songs (as of May 12, 2024)

Taylor Swift

Tim McGraw - March 17 and March 9 (Mashup w/ Cowboy Like Me)

Picture to Burn - July 14

Teardrops on My Guitar - May 5 and February 18

A Place in this World - April 22

Cold as You - April 23

The Outside - February 9

Tied Together with a Smile - July 23

Stay Beautiful - November 17

Should’ve Said No - May 19, February 24 (Mashup w/ You're Not Sorry)

Mary’s Song

Our Song - March 24, August 4

I’m Only Me When I’m with You - June 30

Invisible - May 20

A Perfectly Good Heart

Fearless (Taylor’s Version)

Fearless

Fifteen - May 6 and March 7 (Mashup w/ You're On Your Own, Kid)

Love Story

Hey Stephen - May 14 and May 11

White Horse - March 25, February 23 (Mashup w/ Coney Island, w/ Sabrina Carpenter)

You Belong With Me

Breathe (feat. Colbie Callait) - June 10

Tell Me Why - August 25, March 4 (Mashup w/ Foolish One)

You’re Not Sorry - April 21, February 24 (Mashup w/ Should've Said No)

The Way I Loved You

Forever & Always - May 13, February 26 (Mashup w/ Maroon)

The Best Day - May 14

Change

Jump Then Fall - April 2

Untouchable - November 25

Come In with the Rain - February 10

Superstar

The Other Side of the Door - April 28 and February 17 (Mashup w/ Getaway Car and August)

Today Was a Fairytale - April 22

You All Over Me (feat. Maureen Morris) - June 3

Mr. Perfectly Fine - June 16

We Were Happy

That’s When (feat. Keith Urban)

Don’t You

Bye Bye Baby

If This Was a Movie - June 23

Speak Now (Taylor’s Version)

Mine - May 7, March 2 (Mashup w/ Starlight)

Sparks Fly - May 5 and March 8 (Mashup w/ Gold Rush)

Back to December - July 15

Speak Now - April 13

Dear John - June 24

Mean - April 15

The Story of Us - June 17, March 3 (Mashup w/ Long Story Short)

Never Grow Up - July 7

Enchanted

Better than Revenge - November 12

Innocent - November 24

Haunted - June 9, February 25 (Mashup w/ Exile)

Last Kiss - July 8

Long Live (added to 2023 setlist following release of Speak Now Taylor's Version)

Ours - March 31

Superman - February 9

Electric Touch (featuring Fall Out Boy) - February 8

When Emma Falls in Love - July 7

I Can See You (music video released to concertgoers on July 7 and online on July 8) - August 3

Castles Crumbling (featuring Hayley Williams) - July 28

Foolish One - March 4 (Mashup w/ Tell Me Why)

Timeless - July 14

Red (Taylor’s Version)

State of Grace - March 18

Red - May 21 (Performed on Guitar instead of Piano due to rain damage from May 20), February 16

Treacherous - April 13 and May 12 (Mashup w/ The Alchemy)

I Knew You Were Trouble

I Almost Do - June 9

We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together

Stay Stay Stay - July 29

The Last Time (featuring Gary Lightbody of Snow Patrol) - June 16

Holy Ground - May 27 and February 7

Sad Beautiful Tragic - March 31

The Lucky One - April 2

Everything Has Changed (featuring Ed Sheeran) - July 22

Starlight - July 15, March 2 (Mashup w/ Mine)

Begin Again - April 23 and May 12 (Mashup w/ Paris)

The Moment I Knew - June 4

Come Back… Be Here - May 12 and February 18 (Mashup w/ Daylight)

Girl at Home

Ronan

Better Man - May 19

Nothing New (featuring Phoebe Bridgers) (added to the setlist on May 5, only to be performed when Phoebe Bridgers is one of the opening acts.)

Babe - March 4 (Mashup w/ Death By A Thousand Cuts)

Message in a Bottle - July 23

I Bet You Think About Me (featuring Chris Stapleton) - April 30

Forever Winter

Run (featuring Ed Sheeran)

The Very First Night - November 9

All Too Well (10 Minute Version)

Eyes Open - February 8

Safe and Sound - November 25

1989 (Taylor’s Version)

Welcome to New York - May 28

Blank Space

Style

Out of the Woods - May 6, November 11 (Mashup w/ Is It Over Now?), and May 10 (Mashup w/ Is It Over Now?)

All You Had to Do Was Stay - June 10

Shake It Off

I Wish You Would - June 2, February 25 (Mashup w/ Is It Over Now?)

Bad Blood

Wildest Dreams

How You Get the Girl - April 30, February 23

This Love - May 13 and March 4 (Mashup w/ Call It What You Want)

I Know Places - August 8

Clean - April 1, May 28. March 3 (Mashup w/ Evermore)

Wonderland - April 21

You Are in Love - August 4

New Romantics - August 9

"Slut!" - November 12 and March 8 (Mashup w/ False God)

Say Don't Go - November 26

Now That We Don't Talk - November 24

Suburban Legends - November 17

Is It Over Now? - November 11 (mashup w/ Out of the Woods), February 25 (Mashup w/ I Wish You Would) and May 10 (Mashup w/ Out of the Woods)

Sweeter Than Fiction

Reputation

…Ready for It?

End Game (featuring Ed Sheeran and Future) - November 11

I Did Something Bad

Don’t Blame Me

Delicate

Look What You Made Me Do

So It Goes… - November 20

Gorgeous - April 29

Getaway Car - May 26 (w/ Jack Antonoff) and February 17 (Mashup with August and The Other Side Of The Door)

King of My Heart - August 8

Dancing with Our Hands Tied - November 19

Dress - August 23, March 2 (Mashup w/ I Don't Want to Live Forever

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things - July 22

Call It What You Want - July 1 and March 4 (Mashup w/ This Love)

New Year’s Day - August 9, February 24 (Mashup w/ Peace)

I Don’t Want to Live Forever - June 3, March 2 (Mashup w/ Dress)

Lover

I Forgot That You Existed - August 24

Cruel Summer

Lover

The Man

The Archer (2023 Setlist)

I Think He Knows - May 21

Miss Americana & the Heartbreak Prince

Paper Rings - June 23

Cornelia Street - August 26

Death by a Thousand Cuts - April 1, August 5, and March 7 (Mashup w/ Babe)

London Boy

Soon You’ll Get Better (featuring The Chicks)

False God - May 27 and March 8 (Mashup w/ "Slut!")

You Need to Calm Down

Afterglow - August 27

Me! (feat. Brendon Urie of Panic! at the Disco) - November 20

It’s Nice to Have a Friend

Daylight - June 24 and February 18 (Mashup w/ Come Back... Be Here)

Beautiful Ghosts

Only the Young

All of the Girls You Loved Before - July 29

Folklore

The 1 (2023 Setlist)

Cardigan

The Last Great American Dynasty

Exile (featuring Bon Iver) - August 23, February 25 (Mashup w/ Haunted)

My Tears Ricochet

Mirrorball - March 17 and March 9 (Mashup w/ Epiphany)

Seven (spoken transition part of setlist) - June 17 (w/ Aaron Dessner)

August - February 17 (Mashup w/ Getaway Car and The Other Side Of The Door)

This Is Me Trying - March 18 and February 17

Illicit Affairs

Invisible String (2023 Setlist)

Mad Woman - April 15 (w/ Aaron Dessner)

Epiphany - March 9 (Mashup w/ Mirrorball)

Betty

Peace - February 24 (Mashup w/ New Years Day)

Hoax

The Lakes - June 2

Evermore

Willow

Champagne Problems

Gold Rush - May 12 and March 8 (Mashup w/ Sparks Fly)

‘Tis the Damn Season (2023 Setlist)

Tolerate It (2023 Setlist)

No Body, No Crime (feat. Haim)

Happiness

Dorothea - July 8

Coney Island (feat. the National) - April 28, February 23 (Mashup w/ White Horse, w/ Sabrina Carpenter)

Ivy - July 1 (w/ Aaron Dessner), February 26 (Mashup w/ Would've, Could've, Should've)

Cowboy Like Me - March 25 (w/ Marcus Mumford) and March 9 (Mashup w/ Tim McGraw)

Long Story Short - March 3 (Mashup w/ The Story of Us)

Marjorie

Closure

Evermore (feat. Bon Iver) - June 30, March 3 (Mashup w/ Clean)

Right Where You Left Me - July 28 (w/ Aaron Dessner)

It’s Time to Go

Midnights

Lavender Haze

Maroon - May 26, August 3, August 27, February 26 (Mashup w/ Forever and Always), May 11

Anti-Hero

Snow on the Beach (feat. Lana Del Rey) - March 24 and August 25

You’re on Your Own, Kid - April 14, August 5, August 26, February 10

Midnight Rain

Question…? - May 20

Vigilante Shit

Bejeweled

Labyrinth - November 9

Karma

Sweet Nothing - August 24

Mastermind

The Great War (w/ Aaron Dessner) - April 14

Bigger Than the Whole Sky - November 19

Paris - May 9 and May 12 (Mashup w/ Begin Again)

High Infidelity - April 29

Glitch

Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve - May 7 (w/ Aaron Dessner), February 26 (Mashup w/ Ivy)

Dear Reader - February 7

Hits Different - June 4

Karma (featuring Ice Spice)

You’re Losing Me (From the Vault) - February 16

The Tortured Poets Department

Fortnight (featuring Post Malone)

The Tortured Poets Department

My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys - May 10

Down Bad

So Long, London

But Daddy I Love Him

Fresh Out the Slammer

Florida!!! (featuring Florence and the Machine)

Guilty as Sin?

Who's Afraid of Little Old Me?

I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)

Loml - May 9

I Can Do It with a Broken Heart

The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived

The Alchemy - May 12 (Mashup w/ Treacherous)

Clara Bow

The Black Dog

Imgonnagetyouback

The Albatross

Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus

How Did It End?

So High School

I Hate It Here

Thank You Aimee

I Look in People's Windows

The Prophecy

Cassandra

Peter

The Bolter

Robin

The Manuscript

#theerastour*#the eras tour #setlist #taylor swift #jessielynnposts

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e-von-dahl · 2 years ago

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Samy did another QNA live

A lot of the live was in Finnish and I couldn’t stay for all of it but here’s some more answers

The first song he learned to cover on the guitar was breaking the law

The first cover he sang live was every rose has it’s thorn, it was a school independence day celebration and he wanted to impress a girl he liked but turns out she wasn’t even watching

Out of all his tattoos the palm tattoos are taking the longest to heal

His left palm tattoo hurt more because tattoos on the left side of his body are usually more painful

He’s been sober for four years on the 18th

One of the reasons he stopped drinking was because he ended up with three day hangovers in his early 20s

He got some amazing green tea as a goodbye gift from his therapist (I wish my therapists were that nice, I’m jealous)

Him and his friend from Helsinki were the first ones to get the “best gig ever” tattoos, it was something their sound tech would say to them before every show

He first met Johnny at Tuska festival when Lost Society and Santa Cruz were both playing there

He likes Wargasm UK (Lost Society x Wargasm tour when?)

We have permission to call him our friend

He’s always willing to give up being vegan for strawberry cream cake

He tried going to stores in Scotland once and couldn’t do anything because he couldn’t understand the language (idk if he meant Gaelic or Scots but he said it was more than just a strong accent)

His two favourite movies are Ace Ventura and Interstellar

His neck tattoos were the least painful (somehow)

He misses Taz and is really happy he’s going to see him tomorrow (pls they’re so fucking cute)

He’s planning on starting a clothing brand

His favourite song from razorblade romance is gone with the sin

They almost shut of the shows electricity at the O2 because he climbed up onto a balcony that was like 5 or 6 meters off the ground

His celebrity crush is Taylor Momsen (he’s so right, she’s amazing)

He has a tattoo of Bart and Lisa and so does Amira (she was watching the live and he was so happy about it, he’s still like a little kid who thinks his big sister is the coolest person in the world)

There’s probably a lot of stuff I missed because I don’t understand Finnish properly but here’s the notes I took for anyone who couldn’t watch

#samy elbanna #lost society

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enchantedalexia · 1 year ago

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Songs Taylor Hasn’t Performed on The Eras Tour *complete edition* *updated each night

Debut

tim mcgraw, picture to burn, teardrops on my guitar, a place in this world, cold as you, the outside, tied together with a smile, stay beautiful, should’ve said no, mary’s song oh my my, our song, i’m only me when i’m with you, invisible, a perfectly good heart

Fearless Taylor’s Version

fearless, fifteen, love story, hey stephen, white horse, you belong with me, breathe, tell me why, you’re not sorry, the way i loved you, forever and always, the best day, change, jump then fall, untouchable, come in with the rain, superstar, the other side of the door, today was a fairytale, you all over me, mr perfectly fine, we were happy, that’s when, don’t you, bye bye baby

Speak Now Taylor’s Version

mine, sparks fly, back to december, speak now, dear john, mean, the story of us, never grow up, enchanted, better than revenge, innocent, haunted, last kiss, long live, ours, superman, electric touch, when emma falls in love, i can see you, castles crumbling, foolish one, timeless

Red Taylor’s Version

state of grace, red, treacherous, i knew you were trouble, all too well, 22, i almost do, we are never ever getting back together, stay stay stay, the last time, holy ground, sad beautiful tragic, the lucky one, everything has changed, starlight, begin again, the moment i knew, come back.. be here, girl at home, ronan, better man, nothing new, babe, message in a bottle, i bet you think about me, forever winter, run, the very first night, all too well 10

1989 Taylor’s Version

welcome to new york, blank space, style, out of the woods, all you had to do was stay, shake it off, i wish you would, bad blood, wildest dreams, how you get the girl, this love, i know places, clean, wonderland, you are in love, new romantics, “slut!”, say don’t go, now that we don’t talk, suburban legends, is it over now?, sweeter than fiction

reputation

ready for it?, end game, i did something bad, don’t blame me, delicate, look what you made me do, so it goes, gorgeous, getaway car, king of my heart, dancing with our hands tied, dress, this is why we can’t have nice things, call it what you want, new year’s day

Lover

i forgot that you existed, cruel summer, lover, the man, the archer, i think he knows, miss americana and the heartbreak prince, paper rings, cornelia street, death by a thousand cuts, london boy, soon you’ll get better, false god, you need to calm down, afterglow, me!, it’s nice to have a friend, daylight

folklore

the 1, cardigan, the last great american dynasty, exile, my tears ricochet, mirrorball, seven, august, this is me trying, illicit affairs, invisible string, mad woman, epiphany, betty, peace, hoax, the lakes

evermore

willow, champagne problems, gold rush, tis the damn season, tolerate it, no body no crime, happiness, dorothea, coney island , ivy, cowboy like me, long story short, majorie, closure, evermore, right where you left me, it’s time to go

Midnights

lavender haze, maroon, anti-hero, snow on the beach, you’re on your own kid, midnight rain, question…?, vigilante shit, bejeweled, labyrinth, karma, sweet nothing, mastermind, the great war, bigger than whole sky, paris, high infidelity, glitch, would’ve could’ve should’ve, dear reader, hits different, karma feat ice spice, you’re losing me

The Tortured Poets Department

fortnight, the tortured poets department, my boy only breaks his favorite toys, down bad, so long london, but daddy i love him, fresh out of the slammer, florida!!!, guilty as sin?, who’s afraid of little old me?, i can fix him (no really i can), loml, i can do it with a broken heart, the smallest man who ever lived, the alchemy, clara bow, the black dog, imgonnagetyouback, the albatross, chloe or sam or sophia or marcus, how did it end?, so high school, i hate it here, thanK you aIMee, i look in people’s windows, the prophecy, cassandra, peter, the bolter, robin, the manuscript

Singles

crazier, this is what you came for, i don’t wanna live forever, christmas tree farm, only the young, renegade, carolina, all of the girls you loved before, if this was a movie, safe and sound, eyes open, us.

Other Artists’ Songs

I Miss You I’m Sorry with Gracie Abrams, Thinking Out Loud with Ed Sheeran, espresso with Sabrina Carpenter, Please Please Please with Sabrina Carpenter

Bold- on the setlist

Italicized- on the setlist for a brief time

Crossed out- surprise song

Crossed out and purple- repeated surprise song

Crossed out and blue- twice repeated surprise song

Crossed out and pink- thrice repeated surprise song

crossed out and green- repeated more than three times surprise song

song in mashup- red

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ryanhamiltonwalsh · 7 months ago

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BILLY RUANE

The long awaited premiere of The Road to Ruane documentary is this weekend in Boston. Who was Billy Ruane? He was Boston's modern-rock-scene lunatic godfather, a trust-fund kid who decided to blow it all on his friends and artists, a ceaseless promoter of bands he loved, and a pure injection of uncut chaos in anyone's life that happened to cross paths with his.

We were one of the last bands Billy championed. He tracked us down, on tour, to a bar patio in Knoxville, TN. The club we were playing that night brought the cordless phone out to me and I was certain someone back home must be dead. Instead I heard this on the other end: "This is Billy Ruane. I need Hallelujah The Hills to play my birthday party at the Middle East." When I asked why he had tracked us down to a club in TN to ask *tonight* he said, "It couldn't wait. I love you guys. Just say yes."

I felt like I had just met Hunter S. Thompson's New England cousin. We did say yes and the lead up to the show featured all manner of wild, rambling emails sent to the entire lineup, alternating between excitement and admonishing us for not promoting it harder. The following day, an apology email: "i guess that night i went loopy."

Billy's whole rock-scene origin story began with a birthday party he threw himself at the Middle East, and this one would be his last. It was a wild, fun, emotionally charged night. The video here is from our performance, complete with one of several mid-set announcements from Billy. I enjoyed his unpredictable presence and was so honored he added us to the list of bands he thought were worth a damn in Boston.

After that night, he used to call me at work sometimes (no idea how he got the number) and talk for, like, an hour at a time. The calls were very different than the dancing, kissing, shouting Billy you saw at a show. The thoughts were still wild, but it was delivered in a calm, understated manner, like an AM talk show host or something. I would never initiate the end of the call. If he wanted to tell me more, I always let him keep going. If he couldn't attend one of our shows—sometimes it was for really weird reasons, like he heard rumors that someone he had a beef with would be in attendance—he would send a videographer so he could enjoy the show later at home.

Looking back at my inbox, I see we were emailing weeks before his death about doing another show he was putting together. He had a theme in mind: bands with strings in them.

The last time I saw him in person, he picked up a round of drinks at a Drug Rug show at the Museum of Fine Arts. His Billy-isms seemed especially so willfully in defiance of the accepted rules of society when placed in the context of a fancy art museum. I remember marveling that he knew my name, loved our band.

Hills performed at his memorial concert where, to everyone's absolute shock, his sister tossed some of his ashes onto the audience from the stage. Some people were visibly covered with Billy. One more sloppy kiss. I remember asking people next to me if that had actually just happened. I don't even remember performing that night, but I'll always remember Chris Brokaw's astounding electric guitar feedback tribute to his friend. I can still remember how centered I felt witnessing it.

For many, many years after, his ashes resided at the Middle East Upstairs. A few years ago, I realized that the photo to the left of his urn was him on stage with Hallelujah The Hills; that's me visible right behind him in plaid. All because I got a phone call in Knoxville one night. What a world.

The documentary, I have no doubt, will solidify his legend for music fans far outside of Boston. It can't lose. Just capture 1/10th of the stories, ya know? For instance, Billy once booked the Del Fuegos at Walpole Prison. Apparently, during the set, Billy started dancing in the aisle between the prisoners. Soon they all chanted, “David Bowie! David Bowie!” at him.

These are the kinds of beautiful, surreal tableaux we just don't get if everyone one of us colors within the lines. I'm so grateful Billy didn't even know there was a coloring book in front of him.

#billy ruane #boston #middle east club #hallelujah the hills

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independentartistbuzz · 5 months ago

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7 FROM THE WOMEN: MARLA LEWIS

We are delighted to welcome Marla Lewis, New Jersey born singer, songwriter and educator currently taking the World Indie Charts by storm with her brand new single "Te Quiero A Ti"!

A dynamic and versatile musician, her journey began in 1953 with piano lessons and a memorable TV performance.

After writing her first song in 1961 and dedicating herself to music in 1963, Marla spent a decade performing solo before transitioning to teaching English as a Second Language. There, she created award-winning children's music that captured hearts and minds.

Post-retirement in 2010, Marla returned to her musical roots, collaborating with producer Bob Stander and earning a GRAMMY for her contribution to "All About Bullies…Big and Small." In recent years, she has embraced smooth jazz, releasing "Songbook" in 2021 and "Songbook Vol. 2" in 2023, with her single "Enchantee" topping the World Indie charts.

Her latest single "Te Quiero A Ti" has reached both #13 and #22 on the World Indie Charts!

We connected with Marla for an exclusive 7 From the Women Interview:

What Have You Been Working To Promote Lately?

On May 23, I released a new single, both in English and in Spanish, called “Te Quiero a Ti,” which means simply, I Love You.

It’s a bossa nova tune that features lush piano, flute, electric guitar, drums, and background vocals a la the Manhattan Transfer. I wrote the music, Dave Kinnoin wrote the lyrics, and Melissa Sanley wrote the Spanish translation. I always wanted to sing that song in Spanish, so this is my dream come true!

There’s a backstory here: I met Melissa when I signed up for a Peer Networking program for voting members of the GRAMMYS (I am one), and they paired me up with her. Talk about being touched by an angel! I played this song for her, which I had previously recorded as “Quiero Que Si” (on my first smooth jazz album, SONGBOOK). Melissa informed me that the title was NOT correct Spanish! She then revised the title, wrote the Spanish translation, did the cover art, AND created a Spanish lyric video! Plus, she coached me on every line of the lyric. I feel like I have been blessed! At this writing, Te Quiero a Ti is #13 on the World Indie Charts and # 15 on the Euro Indie Charts!

Here is the link to my tune on Spotify:

And here is the link to the Spanish lyric video:

youtube

Please tell us about your favorite song written, recorded or produced by another woman and why it’s meaningful to you.

My answer depends upon the day! I think of “Strange Fruit” by Billie Holiday. How courageous she was to sing it during her brief time on earth. The metaphor of that song is so powerful. I shake my head at the way humans have treated each other, and thank her for recording that song. I also thank heaven for microphones, without which Billie would not have been able to record, since her natural voice was not very strong.

I also think of Joni Mitchell – how can I name one song? For now, I’ll choose “Troubled Child” from COURT AND SPARK. This is one of the tunes I played over and over and over! The melody, harmonies and arrangement are like chocolate to my ears, particularly the use of the major second, the muted trumpet, and Joni’s smooth vocals.

As with all of her lyrics, you can easily visualize the scene, as in this case, of a kid fighting for his sanity in a mental hospital.

And Laura Nyro – “Save the Country.” Another tune I put on endless repeat. Had me jumping for joy!

What does it mean to you to be a woman making music/in the music business today and do you feel a responsibility to other women to create messages and themes in your music?

I want to create the best songs I possibly can. Period. I’m not “out there” touring and performing, so I’m not in the fray. I write songs at home, sometimes I collaborate, and I go to songwriter workshops to improve my craft. I love the process of creating a song; that is one of my greatest pleasures in life! I’m not “in the business” per se, and I think if I were a man, I would have the same goals and desires for my music as I do now. I feel responsible to my audience – male and female -- to do my best and continue to improve; that sums it up.

I am a retired teacher, thrilled to have more time than ever to create! I wish for only one thing: to have at least one of my songs recorded by a great (female) vocalist, say, Bette Midler? Or Gloria Estefan! Oh, wait, here’s another: I would like at least onbe of my songs to be added to the Great American Songbook.

As for messages and themes, there is one I’d like to explore in my next song: my older self, traveling back in time to guide my anxious, confused younger self!

What female artists have inspired you and influenced you?

Joni Mitchell, Laura Nyro, Ella Fitzgerald, Billie Holiday, Phoebe Snow, Bonnie Raitt

Who was the first female artist that made want to create music / be in the business?

Joan Baez, as soon as I learned to play guitar at age 13, then Joni Mitchell. I wanted to be just like them! They “made it” in a man’s world. Ella did, too. To think shows like “Queen for a Day” aired back then

Do you consider yourself a feminist? If so, why or why not?

I want all people to be treated equal and respect each other, just as Martin Luther King was rooting for everyone, not just Black people. This has been damn near impossible for people to do, since the beginning of time!

If you could collaborate with any other female artists, who would you choose?

This is the toughest question of all! I’d like to collaborate with a fellow smooth jazz artist, but very few of the female jazz greats of today write songs.

I feel too shy to approach the incredible Cecile McCloran Salvant. I’d also consider Diana Krall, who wrote songs with her husband, Elvis Costello. That album wasn’t well received…the only smooth jazz songwriter I can think of today is Michael Franks. Even male recording artists in the jazz genre stick to the old standards!

Connect with Marla Lewis:

Website // Facebook // Instagram // Twitter // Spotify // YouTube

#spotify #music #youtube #indie #new music #interview #indie music #indie artist #pop #Youtube

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rayroa · 9 months ago

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Hiss Golden Messenger Q&A for Creative Loafing Tampa Bay (2024)

Photo by Graham Tolbert/All Eyes Media

I'm gonna put some ear buds in here then it'll sound a whole lot better.

OK, and let me know if it sounds bad because sometimes it does sound bad on here. I've been listening to Pecker Power today, on your recommendation.

Oh, really? Yeah, follow that. Follow that page?

Yeah, my buddy told me to follow it. And it's great because you forget that it's you. It's just like a picture of a record in your feed. And then you just make a decision for that moment. ‘Yeah, alright. Let me find that, man.”

I love having that weird little Instagram account that's not trying to sell people anything—nothing. I'm just talking about dorky music stuff. It's kind of like my vibe right now.

And you have The Kitchen Speculator, too. It's cool that you have these outlets to communicate. It's like a less cynical version of social media, or iteration…

That's right, man, I'm trying to keep it kind of keep it pure.

Hey, I know that fall is your favorite season, but I can imagine that the winter is kind of beautiful in the North Carolina Piedmont. And correct me if I'm wrong, but I remember listening to a podcast or something where you talked about your mom's felt Christmas ornaments with these bells on them. I was wondering, since we're in January, is yours the kind of family that has a tree still up? And do your kids know the sentimental value of the ornaments?

Do they know the sentimental value of the ornaments? Yes, definitely. I don't know if they see it as heavily as I do, but they definitely are aware which ornaments came from my mom. And no, we don't keep the tree up because I love the pageantry of the season—there's something very nostalgic and comforting about things like Christmas lights for me—but I also really appreciate the moving on of January and the feeling of a fresh start if you need it. I kind of think deep into the season and also I'm ready to move on, so I think we had our tree out of the house like just a few days after Christmas probably.

That's an aspirational thing for a lot of families, so it's cool to hear that you have your house in order to that degree.

It's really how I'm wired though. I'm a little bit of an OCD kind of person. So it kind of is in line with that.

Yeah, you gotta check these boxes. You gotta get through the day. I mean, it's kind of a less sexy version of getting a stone up a hill, you know, let me get this tree down first, and move on to the other stuff.

Yeah, kind of.

By the way, I realize there's no way we can like adequately talk about songs in 20 minutes, and I think a lot of people have said a lot of things about Jump For Joy already, so I'm just gonna let those songs kind of speak for themselves and maybe ask some kind of other questions around the band and whatnot.

You've mentioned that the songs are kind of like a long postcard between you and a younger, maybe teenage, version of yourself. And in a way the record's also kind of recalibration of your songwriting, and you're wearing hope, in a way, on this record, and I was thinking about that word "recalibration." And then I was thinking of the band and the fact that Hiss Golden Messenger doesn't do the same show twice—that's a lesson you learned from elders. I want to ask you about this live set. I know after that initial run, you said that the band is sounding good, and the shows are pretty uplifting for everyone. Especially now. Everything considered in the world. Simple question, and I'm sorry, I don't know the answer already. But who is in the band for this spring run coming to Tampa?

Yeah, the band is and has been for several years: Chris Boerner, playing electric guitar, Sam Fribush on organ and piano, Alex Bingham plays bass, and Nick Falk plays the drum kit.

Perfect, and the Hiss Mobile recording unit will be on tour as well. I'm wondering, to stay on that recalibration, Mike. I know that you unpack a tour after a run. How has that recalibration kind of manifested itself within the context of the band? Can you tell me a little bit about how the songs from Jump For Joy have already changed as the shows stack up? And what have these songs revealed to you about themselves in this context, and this run?

It's interesting to take a new record out on the road because we had played a lot of these songs a lot during 2023 before we recorded them, but not in the way that we have been over the past two or three months. The more times you play a new song, the more you learn about how it's working in that sort of heightened or amplified, emotional, state of a live show. And you also see how it's working for the audience. There might be a song that seems like a home run for the audience, and it just isn't like connecting the way that you thought it would and, and conversely, you're gonna find a song that you might have had a question mark about just in terms of how to present it—and it becomes its own.

A song like "Jesus Is Bored " on Jump For Joy. I love that song. I have a super-deep connection to that song; in a lot of ways it kind of feels like a thesis for the record, but it's not the loudest song, it's not the fastest song. I just didn't quite know what kind of quality it would take on live, and it's taken on a really beautiful thing that kind of unfurled really slowly and in a really extended fashion. That's not something I was anticipating at all, but it went there, and I was like, 'This is how we play this song for people.' That's one example of how stuff has started to exist off that record.

That's awesome, and I like hearing your talk about feeling the audience and being aware of it. I think some people would assume that some performers kind of blackout and I guess, to some degree they do on stage, but it's cool to hear that you still get to live in that moment of the live experience that you're creating in this space.

It's a transcendental state for me. So my experience of it is, like I said, is heightened for sure—emotionally, physically. But at the same time, I can feel the energy in the room even if I'm not looking at the audience directly in the eyes, I can feel what the energy is. I would say I'm usually pretty on the money about what an audience wants, what an audience needs, what an audience can take. This is just stuff that, when you spent enough time on stages in front of people, you start to learn how—you can read it.

In that vein, and that kind of context, transcendental memory in that state, are you able to remember anything about geographic locations? Like can you remember, how crowds in Florida have made you feel or is it not like that?

Oh my god, that's a good question. I mean, I want to be diplomatic about it.

I mean, it's OK to be forgettable man.

I don't want to be that dude in the paper that's complaining about the place that he's playing. That's not a good look at all.

Listen, there's a lot to complain about in Florida from a legislative standpoint, historically there are some things...

You don't need more from me. OK, I'll put it this way. I'm fascinated with Florida. I'm not against Florida, you know what I mean? And the last time we played in Tampa, I think, was at a festival many years ago.

It was called Gasparilla Music Festival.

Yeah. And I had a fucking great time. I thought it was really cool. And I thought, 'Tampa seems cool. I'm into this place.' So if I had to talk specifically about my experience with Tampa, that's what it would be: I had a great time in Tampa.

And Tampa has changed a lot, I think as much in the same vein as it has up there with you guys as far as people's concerns about affordability and who matters and what voices get amplified and acknowledged and conversations from a civic standpoint, and things like that. So I think our regions have experienced similar growth.

No doubt.

I want to ask you about November 27 Kitchen Table Speculator. You opened with poems from Diane di Prima and Joy Harjo. You talked about the possibility of a sunset on an empire and whatever this collective thing is that we're witnessing, but then you also talked about holding on to joy and pain and magic and fear all at once—you know, back to getting that stone up the hill. Sorry to kind of bring it down here, but I think I heard somewhere that in spite of all this narrative about joy and this album, in some ways, you're still like the same depressed guy, but you kind of alluded to how the band is bringing some joy and happiness. I'm wondering chemically, or in the inner wiring, how and in what fashion does it change you to play these "happier less cynical songs" every night? Or does it all stay up there, then you get back to the world when it's over.

I mean, this is a multi-part question. First of all, I wouldn't say that I'm the same old depressed guy. And I don't know that I ever would have described myself like that. I definitely struggle with depression and probably always will in some fashion, but also think of myself as a very fun, funny person that can be as light and easygoing or as heavy as the situation calls for. Probably, if you were to ask my bandmates, "Is Mike as heavy as some of the songs might make them feel?," they would say like, "Not at all." So that's that part.

I think that Jump For Joy, in so many ways, is totally consistent, thematically, with the music that I've made all throughout my life as Hiss Golden Messenger. I think that I was working really rhythmically and thinking a lot about tempo for Jump For Joy, and that was very intentional. But in terms of the way the songs exist, the chords that get used, the things that were troubling me, or bringing me joy and peace—that stuff on Jump For Joy feels like it's pretty consistent with the rest of my work. I feel like what people are reacting to when they think of this record as more joyful, which I would agree with, is just the musical feel of the record, if that makes sense.

No, it does. I think from the get go—even on your lo-fi recordings, which I spent some time listening to in the run up to this interview, and revisiting those—there is still this devotion to groove throughout the whole thing.

That's what I'm saying, man. Even the Hiss Golden Messenger songs that are at the slowest tempo, everything always grooves. That's always been almost the most important musical quality of what I do as Hiss, I think. Everything has to feel like it's in the pocket, it's in some kind of pocket, you know? That's really important to me.

Now that you're saying that kind of that out loud, I think of my first—you know, you only get one first time listening to a band—but those first few listens, I think, is interesting how Hiss music does kind of embed itself within whatever tempo you have going on in your life and sometimes Hiss music doesn't fit with whatever's going on in your day at the time, and you realize that, "Oh, this isn't the record for me right now. I gotta find something else." So I've always appreciated that about your music, for sure.

I want to ask you about mystery. I think you've talked about kind of craving mystery and this time of digital media, and endless access and over exposure in a way. What is your mind wandering and wandering about and around today?

I'm working on a lot of projects right now that are Hiss adjacent. I feel like I am just starting a quest—and who knows how long it's gonna last—to find my way back into not knowing, if that makes sense. I'm trying to find my way back to a feeling of mystery and magic. I want that to be the first feeling that I feel when I pick up an instrument. And I'm not saying that I don't feel that already, but it just occurs to me in this moment of our time, that that feels almost like the most important part of music, both as a listener and as a creator—the mystery. So I'm really honing in on that feeling whenever and wherever I can find it. I feel like certainly, part of this year for me is going to be about encountering the mystery, the not knowing, the freshness, the experimentation—encountering it wherever I can find it.

And it's such a wonderful excuse to really work on you're listening, too, whether it's physically listening with your ears or just body listening and emotionally trying to be quiet and tune in.

That's right, man. That's right.

By the way, I liked that you mentioned that you're probably funnier than people might think you are because when I found out that Johnny Fritz was in your “Nu-Grape” video, I immediately went to it because I think he's like, the funniest and best like songwriter with a replaced hip out there.

I mean, that guy is so fucking funny.

But you met the moment in that video. I feel like you two had good, parallel, complimentary performances that were rooted in humor.

Oh, dude. He made that video. I don't even really know Johnny that well, but I'm a fan. It feels like we know each other kind of well now. But before that video, as we were conceptualizing what it was going to be, who, all that stuff, I was like, "We're gonna get Johnny Fritz. It's really like the only way that this concept works, or someone like Johnny Fritz." But I couldn't think of anyone else. I love being with him because he's so funny, and has so many different characters, but he's also a super deep, super smart dude—he's not turned on like that all the time. He's also like a real deep cat.

The songs really mess you up when you're listening to him. He's got those records that like they'll kind of hit you on like the eighth or ninth kind of listen, and you're like, "What did he just say?" You thought it was a song about riding in a tour van, then you realize that he kind of deconstructed this emotion inside of you about abandonment and things like that and it feels intentional once you kind of see it. know?

And I'm sure it is. He's an extremely astute person.

I know we're kind of getting short on time. Mike. I want to kind of go back to happy songs, sad songs, and I want to talk about how those emotions are kind of complex in their own way. Some would believe those emotions are complementary. I know that there is an art to finding the language to write songs about happiness. You mentioned you know, "Jesus Is Bored" as a song that's kind of transformed for you in the live setting, but do you feel like there are songs on Jump For Joy that include both happiness and sadness, in a way, and using language that you're pretty proud of? As far as being a songwriter and being a person?

I think every song on the record is a combination of both at the same time because I've always wanted that to be my mission as a songwriter: to be able to convey like the fullness of being a human—as grandiose or as lofty is that sounds—to convey the fullness of being a human in a song. Part of that, for me, feels like this idea that not everything is either happy or sad. My experience of the world as I walked through it is that everything is both of those at the same time. I mean, not everything, but you know what I mean? My experience mostly is that I'm feeling both at the same time. And I've really chased that ambiguity intentionally over the years with some very specific things that I do technically, from tuning a guitar in a certain way to like leaving the chords very undefined. So yeah, it's a little bit of a cop out answer, but I really think my best songs are songs that feel happy and sad at the same time.

That's a great answer, especially for at the end of a short interview, which I know we're at the end here, and I wanted to kind of leave with this question, maybe. You mentioned you know this mission for this year about encountering that mystery, that not knowing the freshness, that experimentation, and trying to touch it wherever you can find it. Can you maybe tell me—I don't know maybe from a mechanical standpoint or practice standpoint—what does getting small and quiet look like for you? Like, how do you get there?

Well, getting small and quiet isn't the same for me as encountering the mystery because I've actually been doing a lot of work with a lot of different musicians lately. It has been kind of cacophonous in a way. But to answer your question of what it means to get small and quiet, I mean, I think it means me going back to the room that I write in, with a guitar or whatever instruments, and a notebook and, seeing what happens. Sort of surrounding myself with the creative input that still fuels me. There's tons and tons of poetry in this house, there's tons of records, and this is just my place. There's tons of guitars and amplifiers. It's just my place to be sort of quiet and meditative, I guess.

Well, Tampa will be grateful when you get out of that place and come visit us for a few and I think we would all like to join you on the Kamayo Cruise but we'll let you eat cruise food for three days on your own there.

Cruise Food. That's a good name for a band.

It is a great name for a band—that should actually be the sequel to "Nu-Grape," just call it “Cruise Food.”

Haha, that's funny. OK, dude. Well, thank you so much. Thanks for the good questions, actually, they were great.

I really enjoyed talking to you. And thank you for making the time for me and thank you for all your music. It's, been great to have in my life. So I hope you have a great week.

Thank you, brother. Thank you, I appreciate that.

Of course. Bye.

#Hiss Golden Messenger #Mike Taylor #Creative Loafing Tampa Bay

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celestialrry · 4 years ago

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a little jealousy never hurt anybody, right?

6.7k

HIIHIHI this was requested by the lovely @angelsuestyles (their ask is in my recent posts!) ALSOOOO THANK YOU FOR 222 BILLION FOLLOWERS (∩˃o˂∩)♡ (not really but 222 :0 !!! I love all of you guys!! thank you, it literally means so much to me <<<<<333333)

edit: I forgot to put this in here when I first posted but this IN NO WAY is hating on Camille at all (she's literally so hot PLS! she just inspired harry’s 2nd album so she worked for the story) and you guys shouldn’t hate on her either!!!

summary: Y/N and Harry are idiots.

warnings: cursing, mentions of alcohol and illusions to a boner ¨̮ ( I think that’s it...)

Y/N regrets quite a few things.

Like that time when she took her senior photo and didn’t realize the small bit of concealer she had blended under her eyes would flash back so much. Or when she was being introduced to a set of twins and even though she had been completely sober that night, accidentally ended up kissing the both of them, not realizing who was who (she didn’t even remember who she wanted to kiss in the first place). And of course, she regrets somehow being able to put a check in one of those super specific love-cliche boxes.

It really wasn’t her fault for falling for Harry. How could she not? Ever since he asked her to join him on his sophomore tour after she played some guitar for his album, she knew there was no way to crawl out of the hole that had just been dug. All thanks to her her friend Sarah, who introduced the two at her intimate birthday party, just months before Harry started producing and writing for Fine Line.

When an “Oh, shit! You’ll have t’show me sometime!” erupted from Harry after Sarah mentioned Y/N played guitar and even partnered with Mitch on a few projects of his own (that unfortunately, not even after Y/N’s begging, would never be released to the world), Y/N was sure that she would never end up showing Harry, and he was just being sweet. But when a few days later, Harry texted her explaining how he got her number from Sarah and asking if she could get together so he could hear her play, Y/N realized he had been serious, and well, the rest was history.

Harry had insisted she play for a track, then one became a few, then a few became practically the entire album, and soon Harry was talking about how “sick” it would be if she went on tour with them, and after arranging things with her uni and taking a leave from her job, she was ready.

Tour had no shortage of interesting moments, from the time Harry almost broke his ankle during rehearsal and tripping on the microphone wire (why he insisted it have a wire, Y/N had no idea) to Mitch getting really drunk after one show and blabbering on and on about British culture and how different it was from American culture, and YN was sure she’d never seen or heard him talk this much, but no one was complaining.

Y/N had found some sort of companionship in everyone on tour. Sarah had always been like a big sister to her, and the protective instinct really kicked in when they were in a different country, Y/N noticed. Charlotte was pretty new, just like Y/N was and they bonded quite fast over that, and their love for fashion they could never afford. Adam was more open and bubbly, and he took Y/N in like one of his own kids. She truly didn’t think being 23 was so different than everyone else being in their late 20′s and early 30′s but after being treated like a fragile puppy, she noticed that no one else felt the same as her-- she really wasn’t complaining though, it just meant she had all eyes looking out for her, and she kind of needed that to be honest.

Mitch practically became her older brother, and although he was a bit closed off and shy when they first met (which was a few weeks before Y/N met Harry) eventually he was joking around with just her, and teaching her new things on the electric guitar she hadn’t known before.

Finally, Harry. It would be an understatement to say Y/N and Harry got really close, really fast. He was always really good at making friends, but with Y/N it seemed they became great friends in a heartbeat. He opened up about almost everything, fame, missing home, his heartbreaks, his accomplishments, and everything in-between. Y/N did the same, told him how paying for uni was an absolute bitch (to which he offered to pay and she immediately turned him down), how her parent’s divorce impacted her own relationships (Harry had nodded in agreement with that), and about how being on this tour changed her life. By week 2 of tour, the two had become so close, even the fans had picked up on it just during their banter and contact during shows.

“They’re ‘shipping’ you guys,” Mitch had said, taking a sip of water backstage as everyone was gathered in the band’s dressing room. Harry was still getting dressed and ready, so it was everyone but him. “It’s quite cute, honestly.”

Y/N’s brow raised in confusion. “What- why? We act normal like we always do.” She pointed out, firm in her statement. A snort from Charlotte made Y/N turn her head to the strawberry-blonde and gape. “What? Do we- do we not act normal?” She asked, looking around at everyone, now flushing out of embarrassment. “You two act like you’re dating sometimes, love,” Sarah pointed out. “It’s nothing to worry about though, he’s just really affectionate, friends or partners, and we can tell you do too, so it’s inevitable that someone will mistake you guys for a couple.”

“Mistake who for a couple?” A familiar voice asked, and everyone’s gaze wandered over to the door where Harry had walked in with his billowing dress shirt, and dress pants for the night. “You and Y/N.” Adam said, and Y/N’s head had snapped towards him to give him a death stare, but before her eyes could burn into his skull, her attention was dragged away by an arm draping across her shoulders and the dip of the couch next to her. She turned to look at him, and he gave her a soft smiled before squeezing her shoulder with his hand. “Makes sense, s’like we’re practically married.”

“I’m waiting on a proposal.” Y/N said with a grin, and Harry smirked, pulling her in closer towards his body. “You’ll get one soon, pet, don’t worry.” The conversation had then shifted to Mitch and Sarah who were literally work-wife and husband, not yet anyways, but everyone knew he would ask her soon enough. Y/N always like this before shows, happy. Not that preforming and the adrenaline rush afterwards wasn’t enough, but everyone was always together, and she liked that a lot.

She also liked how Harry’s arm had slid down from her shoulders to her waist and how his fingers splayed across her hip, how they gently squeezed, and how his thumb mindlessly ran up down across her skin. It wasn’t an overstatement to say that stayed on her mind the entire night.

。:°ஐ

Harry was always positively buzzing after a show. His narcissistic side loved it when everyone’s attention was on him for hours at a time, screaming his name and shouting their declarations of love. He loved to be told how talented he was, how handsome he was, and how funny he was, it was safe to say he had a bit of a praise kink, if he’s being honest. But if it was even possible, he loved hearing it all from Y/N even more than the thousands of people in the crowd. He told himself many times that it was just because she cared about him, and he cared about her, and hearing praise from someone he knows and respects (not that he didn’t respect his fans) was just so much more fulfilling.

So after every show when he’d rush offstage with he rest of his band, his attention always went to Y/N, waiting for her praise, and he always got it. He, of course, complimented her back, and watching her smile was more than enough to keep him happy the rest of the night. This night had gone the same as all the others, an amazing show, running offstage, and hugs and kisses being thrown around like a beach ball at a rave. “That was awesome H, your whale seems to get better every time.” Y/N had commented, and he had attempted helplessly to keep his cheeks from flushing. “I’ve just got strong lungs, pet. Could never compare to your guitar playing though, the real star of the show. Don’t tell Mitch I said that.”

She waved off his compliment and laughed, pulling him into a soft hug with a soft kiss on the cheek that he was still thinking about when they made their way to a bar for the night. He couldn’t take it off of his mind, not even when there was a pretty blonde in front of him, her hand running flirtatiously over his arm and her smile as blinding as the sun had been earlier.

Of course she was pretty, there was no way to deny it, she just wasn’t as pretty as Y/N. No one was, not after he’d laid eyes on her and began using her beauty to determine everyone else’s attractiveness.

So when his attention from the woman in front of him fades, he’s looking around for the familiar face that he can’t enough of. He meets Y/N’s eyes and immediately her own dart back to Charlotte, biting the inside of her cheek and praying he didn’t catch her staring at him with envy.

Envy of the girl in front of him, who go to express her attraction towards Harry without hiding it, and not worrying about if he feels the same way or not, because of course he finds the girl in front of him attractive, who wouldn’t?

It’s then, that Y/N starts to pity herself, physically and romantically. The partners she’s had before always seemed way too good for her, and she had never been the one to end it. To say that destroyed her self-confidence in the long run would be an understatement.

It wasn’t like she needed a partner to make her confident, no, she was perfectly capable of doing that on her own, but for the first time in a long, long time, Harry made Y/N feel really good about herself. Good about her personality, her humor, everything, because if someone she looked up to that much, if a man like Harry Styles wants to be friends with her? She thinks it just meant she was doing everything right.

So Y/N, in short, was jealous. So jealous and wound up by Harry showing attraction towards that girl, that everyone else seemed to notice she was a bit off. “Y/N, you okay?” Mitch asked from across the booth, his thick brows twisted in concern. “Hm?” She looked up from the wooden table beneath her to see everyone, sans Harry, looking at her with the most pitiful eyes she had ever seen, and god, did she feel disgusted. Disgusted that she had fallen so hard for a man she could never have, that everyone around her noticed and felt bad for her.

“I’m fine, but I think m’gonna call it a night. I’m pretty tired after today’s show.” She said with a tight-lipped smile, hoping it would convince everyone that she was okay. Of course it didn’t though and Adam caught on. “Funny, I was about to say the same. I can’t stay up late like I used to anymore, wanna catch a taxi back?” He asked, and Y/N nodded with a real smile this time, albeit the fact it was small, because she really didn’t want to go back to the hotel alone, and Adam always knew what to say.

Sarah and Mitch slid out of the booth to let Adam out, and Y/N simply stood up on her side because she had the outside seat. Harry was supposed to sit next to her on the edge, but seeing as he went to the bar to grab everyone another round and then ended up talking to someone else, that didn’t happen. She slipped on her light beige coat and grabbed her purse, slinging it on her shoulder as Adam put on his jacket as well. When Y/N looked to the bar where she had last seen Harry, he was still standing there animately talking to the woman in front of him, dimples prominent in his rosy cheeks, and all she could do was hope he didn’t notice the two of them slip out as they made their way to the door.

Alas, Y/N could never be that lucky.

“Hey! Where are y’guys going?”

Y/N and Adam turned around at the sound of his voice and that was when Adam went in full protective mode, slinging his arm around Y/N’s shoulders and pulling her in closer. She made a note in her head to thank him immensely when they escaped this bar.

“Heading out for the night, we’re both pretty pooped.” Adam explained, eyes darting from Y/N to Harry who now stood in front of them, his own eyes darting from Y/N to Adam then back to the girl who was now avoiding eye contact at all costs.

“Oh, alright then. Are- Y/N are you okay?” He asked softly and only then did her eyes meet his own. “Yes, I’m fine. I feel like such a baby when I’m around you guys.” She joked, her lips curling into a small smile.

Adam chuckled at that and so did Harry, but Y/N could tell the curly headed one was still concerned. “Well we gotta catch a cab, so…” She trailed off, her thumb poking back to the door.

“O-okay,” Harry nodded. “Get back safe, yeah? Have a good night.” He said in parting and Y/N and Adam both nodded, wishing him the same before turning back around and pushing through the door. Harry watched the two of them leave, and his stomach bounced around in an odd way.

The cold air whipped across the duo’s faces, and and Adam rubbed Y/N’s shoulder comfortingly as he hailed a cab. They didn’t talk until they were settled in the back and Adam told the driver the destination. “Wanna tell me what’s up? Cause I’m not gonna bother you anymore when we get to the hotel.”

She smiled at him and scoffed a bit before trilling her lips, a soft noise releasing from her mouth at the movement. “Um,” She began, running her hands through her hair. “I’m pretty sure you already know.”

At her words, Adam just raised a brow at her. “What? You guys all looked at me like someone just killed my puppy back there!” She defended, raising her hands. “Okay, fine, fine. It won’t help if you keep all your emotions bottled in though, you know?”

“Yeah,” She sighed. “I know.”

After getting back up to her room, doing her nightly routine (which really was just her washing her face, brushing her teeth, and changing into the t-shirt Harry gave her a few weeks ago and her Spongebob decorated fluffy pajama shorts that she got in college as a joke but really ended up being her favorite item of clothing she owned, other than Harry’s shirt, of course) she slipped into bed and began scrolling on her phone.

Only what felt like 15 minutes later, a knock on her door broke Y/N out of the trance she was in and she sighed a bit, pulling the covers back and grumbling as she made her way to the door, annoyed at whoever was behind it-oh.

Harry looked at her as she swung the door open for him and he immediately grinned. “Hi, love.”She could never stay mad at him. “Hey, H.” She smiled at him, still a bit confused. “What’s up?” He ran a hand thorough his hair and retained eye contact with her, before speaking.

“Sleepover?”

She nodded and let him in, and immediately he went to her suitcase without a word, pulling out some her biggest sweatpants and stripping to his boxers, slipping the joggers on and keeping his shirt off. Y/N suddenly was reminded of all of Harry’s tattoos she knew none of the meanings behind.

Sleepovers were common with the two of them, and they always occurred in Harry’s suite, Y/N on the way too comfortable couch, and Harry guiltily on the bed even though she insisted she take the couch because “We can’t have your back hurting when you preform!” And he couldn’t say no when she also said “Please?” and looked at him with those soft eyes.

So now it was a bit different, being in her room, because 1, there was only one bed that they would both consequently end up sleeping on, and 2, Y/N and Harry’s feelings had both developed a bit further than friendly (although neither knew about the other’s).

She hesitantly crawled back into her bed and patted at the area right beside her, which Harry quickly traveled over to, lifting his side of the comforter and pulling it over the both of them while Y/N leaned over to the night-stand and grabbed the T.V. remote. She plopped back into the pillows and started scrolling through random channels, trying to find a decent movie for the two of them to fall asleep to.

All the while, Harry was attempting to look at the T.V. but the light was shining on her face in a way that just made her look so pretty, not that she wasn’t always pretty, but she seemed to always look the best when she was in her natural state, no makeup, no nice clothes, it was just all so domestic and the feeling overwhelmed him when he realized he wanted to be the one to see her like this every night.

Her eyes darted from the T.V. over to her right where Harry was curled up in the covers, and she could feel the burn of his eyes on her. Now that really didn’t help with her insecurities, and as she continued switching through the channels she found herself burying under the covers more and more. Soon, she landed on a stupid rom-com that she’s seen a few times before but she never really knows what it’s about because her attention gets easily dragged away from it.

She puts the remote back on the table and flips back around to be face to face with Harry, who was now looking at her with furrowed brows. “Why’re you burying yourself under the covers?” He asked with a frown, and she lulled her head away from him then back, biting the inside of her cheek. “M’just a bit cold.”

His brows raised because he knew full well it wasn’t cold at all in this room, in fact it was quite hot, but he didn’t want to deal with her lying and thinking she could get away with it, so he pulled the covers off of himself, which actually cooled him off a good amount and piled them all on top of her. “Hey!” She cried out, muffled by the fabric on top of her. “M’hot, so I figured you could have my covers.”

He heard a bit of grumbling and the covers were flung off of the bed entirely in a few seconds, Y/N sitting up and leaning on her arms breathing a bit heavy and turning to Harry with a stink in her eye. He just flashed his signature cheeky grin and she grabbed her pillow and hit him over the head before placing it back and pulling the sheets over her body.

“Ow! You fucker.”

。:°ஐ

Harry was sure about a lot of the things he did.

Like when One Direction split up, he didn’t remain in constant contact with the boys, and while it was difficult at first, they all needed a break, and it just made it so much better when they met up to hang out again. Or when him and Camille both decided it was for the best that they break up and they remain friends to this day. And of course, he was sure about bringing Y/N on tour.

She was possibly one of the best people he had ever worked with, and one of the best friends he’s ever had. He was sure about getting close with her, and he was sure about keeping her close. Only, now keeping her close meant keeping her arms length apart, because if he got any closer he wouldn’t be able to handle being with her any closer than a few little touches and hugs and cheek and forehead kisses, not when he couldn’t have her.

So it was safe to say when he opened his eyes the next morning with Y/N flung over him, her leg between his own, her arm wrapped around his chest with her face pressed into the junction of his shoulder and neck, and her warm soft breaths hitting his bare skin, making goosebumps pimple, he freaked out. 1, because friends did NOT cuddle like this, and 2, the close contact was making his chest clench and his lower abdomen heat up.

He let out a shaky breath and thanked his lucky stars Y/N was a deep sleeper, and slowly slid out from under her, ignoring how his arms were wrapped around her and his hands were touching her bare skin where her shirt (his shirt really, and that just made it about a billion times worse) had ridden up in the night. As he was pulling his torso from her body after getting his legs out, she let out a whine and her grip on his back tightened.

His heart beat wildly fast, so fast he wouldn’t be surprised if he looked down and saw it moving through his skin, and he stilled, terrified that she was awake. A few minutes went by, and she didn’t stir anymore, so after chalking her movements up to a dreaming Y/N, he moved a hand and gently took her soft hand off of his bare skin, letting out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding.

Finally he’s out of bed, and slipping on the clothes he wore the night before, folding the sweats he borrowed and putting them back in her suitcase. He grabs his phone off the other side table Y/N never used and reaches her door, making the terrible mistake of looking back. Y/N’s face is smushed into the pillow he put under her head, her lips sightly open as she slept and her arms now curled around the pillow Harry had used last night, and he would swear on his mum’s life that she was breathing in his scent if not for the fact that he was certain she didn’t like him the way he liked her, and he didn’t want to barter his mum’s life on something so uncertain.

His chest clenched for what felt like the billionth time this morning and even if he didn’t know it then, he had already decided that he couldn’t handle this anymore, whatever this was, and began to push the sleeping girl out of his mind and heart, in order to save himself from future heartbreak.

。:°ஐ

When Y/N woke up, her bed was empty, and she had never felt akin to a bed until that morning.

。:°ஐ

The last time Harry really spoke to Y/N was the night he slept over.

It had been a little over a month since then, and she was trying really hard not to let it get to her, but seeing as Harry interacted just fine with everyone else, and his problem seemed to be with just Y/N, she couldn’t help the nagging feeling that she had somehow scared him off.

A week after he slept over, the only times he spoke to her were for performances and work-related things, and her mind had been swarming with questions. Did she say something about him, or to him while she was sleeping? Sure, she had a dream about him, but it wasn’t anything dirty (although that had happened a few times before), they were just at a carnival and there was a ride in which they got to fly, it was quite fun. Did she cuddle him too much? Sure she could be really touchy when she’s tired, but so can Harry if his wandering hands (only in appropriate places) when they had movie nights were anything to go by.

So her questions went unanswered, and her attempts to speak with him were fruitfully ignored, whether that be he pretends he didn’t hear her the first time, or if he excuses himself before answering because he had to talk to someone about something.

Everyone else in the band noticed, and Y/N didn’t know it, but everyone at tried to talk to Harry about it at least once. Adam mentioned how Y/N and Harry seemed to have drifted apart and Harry only hummed in agreement, making it obvious he didn’t want to talk about it. Charlotte had asked Harry if he was doing okay, to which he responded “Of course I am, why wouldn’t I be?” And she didn’t feel like it was her place to tell him that Y/N had come to her crying about Harry’s actions, or lack thereof, towards her and she didn’t know what was wrong. Sarah was blunt with Harry, telling him how it was obvious Y/N and him weren’t speaking and asking what had happened to which Harry shrugged it off and told her that “people grow apart”, and it wasn’t anything personal. Mitch had tried to the same, to no avail, despite being even more blunt than everyone else.

And that led them here, 15 minutes before Harry’s second, and last night in L.A. on his tour before they head to New York. He was quite looking forward to it, excited to see the few friends who couldn’t make it the night before. It was easy, going out with people after the performance, not having to think about Y/N as he drinks the night away.

He looked in the mirror in front of him, patting the invisible dust off of his pearl adorned blazer and pants, the wife-beater under his coat so thin his tattoos could be traced. Usually after he was dressed he would pop into the band’s dressing room just to shake off the nerves beforehand, but he stopped doing that after he began to push himself away from Y/N. There would be no where else to sit but next to her, and that didn’t help his overwhelming need to hold her. So instead, he made his way to the couch in his room, relaxing for the few minutes he had.

Y/N on the other hand was sitting in the dressing room with Sarah, Mitch, Charlotte, and Adam, all conversing about how ready they were, the energy in L.A. the night before had been off the charts, and they were more than excited to feel it again. All Y/N could think about, however, was that this just meant there was one more show to play, then tour would be over, and there would be no more reason to be in Harry’s band. Not when he clearly didn’t want to be friends with her anymore, and she thinks this is the worst she’s ever felt in a long, long time.

。:°ஐ

The first part of the show goes really well. Harry is hyping up the audience, and everyone is smiling. “She” was the next song they were to play after Harry stopped interacting with the audience and Y/N was excited. It was one of her favorite songs to play, and she loved just stopping and listening when Mitch did his solo. He usually did the more detailed guitar work, while Y/N worked with the backing chords.

“Alright, the next song we’ll be playing is “She”, let’s make sure not to get Mitch’s ego too high afterwards though.” Harry had laughed into the mic, walking back to the stand and clicking the mic into place. Then, it began. It was good, it really was, until Y/N noticed that Harry had faltered a bit in the chorus, and her eyes followed his own to the blonde hair in the VIP section. It was her, Camille, the muse behind this entire album. Her heart stuttered as she noticed he couldn’t take his eyes off of her. She was gorgeous, prettier than all of the pictures she’s seen.

And Harry was looking only at her in the crowd. It was then, that Y/N started to go a bit haywire. He began to sing the chorus, and she guesses her fingers held the pick a bit tighter, and strummed bit harder, because after 10 seconds of playing she realized she could no longer hear his voice. Almost immediately did she soften the strumming and look up to see Harry turn to face her, confusion and anger, maybe, written all across his face. She ignores it and continues to play until the song is over. She’s not listening when the crowd cheers, but she regrets tuning in when Harry introduces the next song on the set list, how he says that it’s possibly one of his favorites, and meet’s his ex’s eyes when he starts to play Cherry.

It’s then that Y/N breaks. She keeps her eyes down, and her strumming quiet, just incase she falters (which she does about 2 times), and when her mouth moves up to sing the backing vocals she realizes that her eyes are welling up and her throat is closing in. She closes her mouth and continues to play the guitar, missing Harry’s look back at her, and the rest of the band’s attempt to conceal the fact that she had stopped singing in the middle of the verse.

The rest of the show goes on, and her tears are held back when they all wave goodbye, and when they rush offstage, and when Harry’s hand brushes her arm that she’s sure was a mistake (it wasn’t), and they continue to be held back until she bursts into the unisex restroom just a mere 20 feet away from the dressing rooms. She locks herself in a stall and sits on the closed toilet seat, shaking hands covering her face as she chokes on her sobs, knowing she would never be enough for Harry, thinking about how he want’s nothing to do with her, and how big of a mistake she made going on tour with them, because if she didn’t, then she wouldn’t have fallen in love with Harry, and she wouldn’t be feeling this way.

What feels like hours, but was actually just 15 minutes of her crying all the tears she could cry, she decided it was better to mope in her own hotel room rather than in a public place where anyone could walk in. She steps out of the stall and doesn’t bother looking in the mirror, only washes her hands, then rinses her face, patting it dry with a cheap brown paper towel. She crumples it up and tosses it in the trashcan, walking out of the restroom to see Harry outside of his dressing room, his arms wrapped around Camille in an intimate embrace.

Intruding would be a good word to describe how she felt right then, and quickly did she speed walk the other way, trying not to let any more tears fall as she opens the door to the bands dressing room to see Sarah and Mitch packing up her things. One look at her was all it took to break the dam that held her tears, and she covered her mouth with her hand, her head falling down and her other arm wrapping around her stomach, maybe it would make things better.

Sarah quickly hands Mitch Y/N’s bag that held her sweats, sweatshirt, purse, and phone she brought to the venue, and takes the girl into a much needed embrace. She cried into Sarahs chest for a bit, snotty apologies from Y/N that Sarah waved off, insisting it was okay, and that she would be okay.

After calming her down a bit and receiving a hug from Mitch, she takes her bag and walks into one of the privacy divider boxes, changing into the clothes she would wear tomorrow on the flight, and tonight to sleep in. Mitch and Sarah lead her out of the venue with all of their arms locked, and bring her to the car, the hotel, and lastly her room.

“We’re right next door, if you need anything. Are you sure you don’t want us to stay?” Sarah asked, biting her lip in anxiousness. Y/N shook her head, her puffy eyes hurting from the movement. “No, I’m gonna be okay. Thank you- um, can-can you not tell anyone? I just-”

“Of course we won’t tell anyone,” Mitch interrupts her, making sure she won’t start crying again, because if there’s something he wants least, it’s to see her cry. “We’ll see you tomorrow morning, okay?”

Y/N nods, and they all hug and part with declarations of love and goodnight’s.

。:°ஐ

Harry just arrived at the hotel after a quick late dinner with Camille at her flat, catching up and eating some really good Chinese take-out. It was always good seeing her, they weren’t super close anymore of course, she had a new boyfriend now, he was there too actually, a really fine lad that he thinks Camille deserves, but he enjoyed getting to see her with no bad-blood.

So the night was going good, other than Y/N’s weird guitar mishap and her faltering voice during the show, that he couldn’t stop thinking about.

Well, it was going good, until Mitch called him after Harry sent him a text talking about how he was back at the hotel, and told him that he was really stupid. Told Harry that Y/N seemed really hurt earlier, and how he thinks that Harry ignoring her caught up to her. Of course, Mitch knew it was partially untrue, but to remain loyal to Y/N he couldn’t tell Harry why she was so upset, and exactly how upset Y/N really was.

Upon hearing this, Harry’s mood deflated and he rushed to Y/N’s hotel room, knocking a few times with a soft “It’s me, Harry.” through the door. Y/N heard it, but there was no way in hell she would open the door for him, so she feigned sleep and hoped he wouldn’t attempt to wake her up. “Are you awake, love?” No answer. “Pet?” No answer. “Okay, well, I just wanted to talk to you, um, but we can do that tomorrow, I-um, I’m sorry.”

He left, after that, leaving her to curl up in her covers alone, tears leaking from her eyes.

The next morning was anything but fun, they were to wake up at 6 and catch the 7:30 AM flight from L.A. to New York. Of course, everyone one in the band and a few others got first class, while the rest of the crew rode on Harry’s rented private jet, to hold all the equipment that wasn’t provided at the venue.

So this meant that Y/N and Harry would have to be stuck in the same cabin of a plane together for about 5 and a half hours. Luckily they weren’t designated to sit next to each other, but Harry had other plans.

He switched tickets with a hesitant Charlotte and got the aisle seat, where Y/N would have the window seat. He got on first, and got settled in, biting his lip in nerves, he wasn’t really sure how he would be able to explain away all of his actions to her, but he knew that he had to, he didn’t want to loose Y/N.

Y/N stepped onto the plane, flashing a fake smile at the flight attendant who obviously noticed her puffy eyes and frowning face. Her eyes darted from the row number and seat letter to the ones on the top of the cabin, and when she found the matching pair of seats, there he was, in all his sweatpants-sweatshirt covered glory.

Her mouth opened to tell him she didn’t want to sit next to him, but when he looked up at her with a soft smile, all she could do was close her lips and sigh, squeezing past him to plop down in the seat with the window.

He didn’t try to speak to her, and she did the same, but he really wanted to. Wanted to ask her how she was, what she had been doing when they stopped talking (or when he stopped talking to her), if her Mom was still working at the job she wanted to quit or if she finally did it, if she still wanted to get a cat when tour was over, but he just couldn’t.

He had no idea where to even start, does he talk to her, then hope the conversation will lead to a place where he can apologize, or does he just apologize straight up, but have no explanation as to why he hurt her in the first place.

The internal battle lasted until they landed, when they got off the plane, traveled to the hotel, and when they went to their respective suites.

Y/N considered herself lucky that Harry had decided to not speak to her on the flight. That wouldn’t have given her an option to opt out of the conversation, and she knew he was smarter than that. She didn’t know however, that when she opened the door to her hotel room after a hasty knock, expecting another member of the band, that Harry would be standing in front of it, his eyes widened in anxiety.

“Wh-”

“I’m sorry,” he blurted out, interrupting her and walking past her into her room that she hadn’t invited him into. “I’m so sorry for ignoring you, and-and not talking to you when you tried to talk to me. You didn’t deserve it, I’m sorry.”

Her brows raised in surprise and she shut the door behind him, staying near the entrance. As her mouth opened to accept the apology, her mind raced through how she had been feeling the past month and instead she said, “It’s been a fucking month Harry, I-I thought everything was fine, and then one day you just decided to cut me out?”

“I know,” He stepped closer to her, guilt rushing through him. “I know, it was stupid of me, and I shouldn’t have, but I didn’t even know what to say. You wouldn’t even look at me on the flight and I-“

He was interrupted by her walking up and pushing her finger against his chest. “I wouldn’t talk to you?” She scoffed, tears brimming her eyes. “I-what did you expect after you pushed me away for a month, no warning, no reason-”

“Of course I had a reason!” Harry raised his voice, eyes watery as well. “I fucking love you! That’s why, and-and we were getting too close than friends should, and I couldn’t handle not being with you.”

Silence.

“Fuck, Y/N I’m so sorry-mmph!”

His apology was silenced by her lips on his, and his eyes widened as he realized what was happening. They fluttered closed, and his arms wrapped around her torso, while her hands were placed on his cheeks and wowthiswasreallyhappeningandhewasn’tdreamingwashedreamingnohewasn’t-

Y/N pulled away with a deep breath in and laughed a bit, her forehead resting against his. “If you didn’t catch on with that, I love you too.”

Harry laughed and cheekily grinned, pulling her even closer than she was before. “Really? I’m not sure I got it, can you help me understand a bit more?”

She swatted his chest and kissed him once more. “Cheeky bastard.”

#stillcantbelieveharrywonagrammy #stillsadaboutpostponedtour #itswhateverthough #harry styles #harry styles one shot #harry styles imagine #harry styles fluff #harry styles angst #mitch is my favorite person

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honeypirate · 4 years ago

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Made of Sunlight

Tokoyami

Tokoyami x Fem!Reader with Similar Quirk!

quirk is she has a quirk partner that is almost identical to her but she is made out of the light of the sun, her quirk is almost like the opposite of Dark Shadow. The idea for this quirk I got from this post

Tokoyami x Y/N

Dark Shadow X OC Kira (quirk partner)

Warning: only lightly edited

“Kira I know. I see them. You know you’re not supposed make so much noise” your quirk and partner huffs before blending into the light around you. Your eyes follow the boy with the beautiful feathers and his shadow partner as he finds his seat in the class, you stand by the door, waiting for the teacher to crawl out of his sleeping bag before you enter the room.

“Who’s that?” Dark Shadow whispered into his ear when you finally walked inside, “she must be new. There’s something about her. I like her” Tokoyami watches as you talk to Mr. Aizawa, your kind eyes and smile making his heart race. He senses something, something is different about you, he has to know.

“There is an open seat next to Tokoyami and Dark Shadow, don't make too much noise. I’ll give you the first day tests after your classes, meet me at the training field outside at 3” you nod and then look over at the boy you had eyed before, the one Kira had made a fuss over. You felt her stir, fluttering about and making your back tingle. You willed her to calm down and keep her emotions in check.

“Hi” Dark Shadow whispered as he popped his head over next to you, making you chuckle, and Kira swoon against you. You tried to keep your expression calm but you were really annoyed she couldn't relax just because she thought the shadow was cute. “Hi” you respond, Kira echoing it in your head ‘hi hi hi hi hi’ you lean around Dark shadow and make eye contact with the boy “Hi” you say to him and he clears his throat “Hi, I’m Tokoyami, welcome to our class” “I’m Y/N. It’s a pleasure to meet you Tokoyami.” you reach out your hand and when he takes it you both feel electricity run down your spines “I hope I can sit next to you this whole time.” you add and his eyes widen for a second before Aizawa starts the class.

“This is Y/n L/n. she will be joining our class from today on. She just moved here from America and against my judgement she has been placed with us in the middle of the year. Everyone be nice to her.” and with that he launched into his lesson.

At the end of class you found yourself surrounded by new faces, you learned their names and immediately connected to them all. “Are you moving into the 1A dorms?” a nice girl named Mina asks and you nod “my stuff should be getting moved over now. I’m on the fifth floor, room three” the nice frog girl with the green hair, Asui, smiles “that’s next to my room, Yaoyorozu is also on that floor” you grin “perfect! I hope we can be good friends!”

Tokoyami watches you as you talk to the girls, the other guys around him talking about how cute you were and speculating what your quirk was. He couldn't help the way his heart would race every time you would look around the room until your eyes fell on him, he wasn’t always glad he had a bird head but he was in that moment, because you couldn't make him blush on the outside, you only affect his heart.

“So your quirk is similar to Tokoyami’s except your’s is with the light and not the shadow.” you nod as you use your quirk to blend the light around Kira, making her visible to everyone now and not just you. She flicks her hair and it glitters with fractured light “yet she makes me hide away” she says dramatically with a huff, hoping she could get some sympathy from the teacher but she was dreadfully mistaken. “We’re going to run through these tests and if you fail you’re out of my class” you gulp, but nod once, getting into the right mindset as Kira sighs, rolling her eyes, before nodding and squaring her shoulders.

“You passed, barely. You’re free to go. I’ll have make-up tests for you from what we covered at the beginning of the semester, they won't be due until the end of the semester but you will have to do them” you nod once and then he turns and walks away, rubbing his eyes.

“I dont keep you hidden on purpose. It just takes a lot out of me to hold your form” you say through pants as Kira fades back into the light, blending into invisibility. “I know. I know. I’m you so i know everything. I just like to give you a hard time” she pats your head and you chuckle before walking out towards the new dorms.

“So that’s why she was different” He says from his spot at the window “she is beautiful” Dark Shadow adds beside him “the light hurts you if you don't remember” Dark Shadow sighs, sounding like a lovesick creature “it doesn't hurt me per say, it just makes me weak, which she already does” he drones and Tokoyami rolls his eyes. “Don’t act like i don't know how the human girl makes you feel, i know your thoughts” Tokoyami just ignores Dark Shadow as he gathers his things up from his studies, maybe he’d offer to show you around the dorms or something, either way, he’d talk to you somehow. Probably. If he could get the guts up for it.

After getting back to the dorms, Mina and Asui take your hands and show you around, giving you the grand tour. When they get to your room you find a collage of decorations that spelled out your name on your door “aww that’s so cute guys!” you say and Mina squeals, “just wait!” she says and then she opens the door.

Inside is all the other girls and a few of the guys, one you think is called Deku and the other was the boy with many arms, he must have moved the furniture around. He looked sheepish and sweet. You look at all of their smiling faces before you realize that your boxes were unpacked and your bed was made. You gasp and look around the room with wonder, they had even decorated. “Guys” you whisper and blink away tears “this is so nice. This means so much to me you have no idea” your eyes land back on the group of kids and Mina steps forward “we’re glad you like it, we thought you might be mad but we wanted to do something to welcome you. We left your clothes packed though” you laugh “okay. Thank you. Really. I wasn’t looking forward to unpacking. And you decorated!” Yaoyorozu steps forward “I hope you dont mind, but we added a few things from our rooms as well” she points out the wall behind you and you turn, gasping again and going over to it, a collage of different things from them, little pieces of their personalities, pictures and posters form their rooms and a few from the others here.

One poster in the middle catches your eye “this is AMAZING! Is this the rare all might poster from the-” Deku cuts you off and steps forward “yes! From issue 234 of the” you finish the sentance with him “heroes of the world magazine!” you laugh with him “thank you! They dont sell that magaizine in america, i only read about it online.” he scratches the back of his neck “it’s no problem, i have two” you gasp “You have TWO OF THEM?” Mina laughs “he has more than that you should see his room” she gasps and grabs Ochakos hand “we should show her our rooms too!” “wait!” you shout and they look at you, you grin “did you guys find my star stickers?”

Every room you saw you rated, extremely generously because it was fun, and gave their door a colored star sticker.

Mina- “12/10 and a gold star. I LOVE the pink! 3 red stars for that because I don’t have pink”

Ochako- “12/10 and a gold star. I feel really comforatble here. Very Homey. 4 blue stars because blue makes me feel like home for some reason”

Yaoyorozu - “100/10 because omg girl your bed is a dream. Three gold stars for that bed alone” she blushed, she was a little embarrassed about it before but now she feels glad.

Jirou- “19823429347/10 are you KIDDING ME? You’re so badass Jirou! Maybe if you have some time we can jam out sometime, i’m decent at the guitar. Let me know” you smile and place every color of star on her bedroom door as she blushes in the corner

Hagakure- “I love the cherries! And the stars! This is so cute! 11/10!” she claps when you place gold stars on her door

You go through the boys rooms, fangrling over Deku’s and placing red, blue, silver, and gold stars on his door.

When you get to the last room on the list, Tokoyami, they all make excuses and try to bypass it, saying it was too dark and scary to see again, but on your way back to your room you shake your head, what could be so bad? Kira whispered to you and you nodded, sneaking back and knocking on his door.

“Hi” you say when he opens it a crack. “I was wondering, could I see your room? Everyone else showed me theirs and i was curious what made yours so creepy” he looked you over once, before Dark Shadow pulls the door open the rest of the way “come on in! Hey where's your friend?” you furrow your bows as you’re herded in the room by dark shadow “he means your quirk partner” Tokoyami says as he faces away from you, embarrassed that everyone thinks his room is scary.

“Im right here!” Kira says but she doesnt show up, the darkness drowning out any powers she may have had alone. You chuckle and concentrate the last of your energy, pulling light from the open doorway and his purple lamps to build her form better, “it’s not that i hide her, her form is just made out of the light, so it’s harder to keep her visible. Tokoyami, Dark Shadow, this is Kira.” as Dark Shadow and Kira talk about their lives being attached to someone, you look around Tokoyami’s room as he just stands awkwardly.

“Your room is SO cool” you say softly as you gawk at his decorations, you’d keep your room like this if it wasn't so hard on Kira “look at this!” you exclaim as you hold up his skull decoration with glowing red eyes and he chuckles in shock, you were so cute, so bright and bubbly, literally made out of sunlight, and you liked his room? He was so intrigued by you. “This is the skull of Yorick, the king's jester” you say in a dramatic voice and then giggle as you set down the skull and look at his other things. His heart was beating out of his chest, how were you so perfect? And WHY WASN'T HE SAYING ANYTHING?!

You make your way slowly around his room, your hand running along the edge of a cape that was on the back of his desk chair, you point to a poster in the middle of his collage, a band that you listen to often “is that from their last tour? Did you go?” He pops out of his head band takes a step towards you “no I couldn’t go, unfortunately. They’re my favorite band” you beam at him and he feels his heart pop out more butterflies that flood his veins “they my favorite too! We should go to a concert sometime together, if you’d like” yes. You have killed the resident bird boy. “I/ I - uh - I - *Tokoyami brain go:@•#[*“ Dark Shadow and Kira move closer to you guys “he's trying to say he would really like that” Dark Shadow says, patting Tokoyami on his back as Kira giggles. Tokoyami brushes Dark Shadow away

You feel a little dizzy and Kira flickers for a moment before fading “sorry I’m just at my limit. Mr Aizawa goes hard” you laugh and Kira sighs dramatically. “Are you okay? The dark probably doesn’t help. Maybe you should go” Tokoyami forgot about his nerves and shyness, just for a moment, now worried for you.

You laugh “the darkness makes it harder for Kira but I’m okay with it. But I should go I don’t want to impose” when you get to his door Kira says goodbye to Dark Shadow, and he hands her a small piece of paper and you turn to Tokoyami, who’s watching the exchange a little confused “it’s for our collage in our room, Mina and the others gave us some things to make it feel like home, posters and pictures. Thank you for showing me your room,” you place your hand on his arm gently “no matter what anyone says it’s a freaking amazing room, not scary at all” you smile warmly and he feels his tongue get thick in his mouth, his palms start to sweat, “th-thank you” he nods and then panic flashes through his eyes “wait!” He says before you turn and he walks back into his room, grabbing the poster you commented on and handing it to you “for-“ he clears his throat “for your collage” you beam up at him, excitement on your face and on your voice “really? You don’t have to! It’s your favorite! I couldn’t-“ he chuckles, and a surge of confidence finds him, finally, as he says boldly, albeit a bit shaky from his nerves “I insist. I’ll get another when we go to a show together” a soft sound of elated shock escapes your throat, one that he really liked hearing, as you gaze up at him “thank you, Tokoyami”

After his door closes you place a gold sticker on it before walking away “What did he give you?” You ask Kira “this drawing!” She shows you a small piece of paper with a quick pen drawing Dark Shadow made of him and Kira. It was adorable honestly. You chuckled softly as she sighed like she was love sick.The next day you find the picture hung up by your mirror, on its own special place Kira chose.

The next few weeks flew by, you spent all your free time studying and having Yaomomo tutor you so you could turn in all your make up work in the first month, hoping to make your way on Aizawa’s good side, which by the nod he gave you you’re pretty sure it worked. To celebrate Mina suggests a movie night at the dorms and everyone, even Bakugou who you haven’t even spoken to once, agreed, which honestly shocked you.

You put on a pair of cotton shorts and a big sweatshirt before grabbing a soft blanket and heading downstairs, the smell of popcorn hitting you before the elevator doors opened. “Hey y/n! Do you like scary movies?!” Mina asks as you enter the kitchen area. “Yeah I do! Are we going to watch one?” Half of the kitchen sighs and Mina laughs “it was a tie that you just decided!” You laugh “sorry guys” you scratch the back of your neck before Mina grabs your hand, dragging you to the couches and pulling you down next to her.

“So do you like anyone yet? It’s been a month, do you have any eyes on any of the boys?!” She asks excitedly and you chuckle as a few other girls come over “Don’t get me started!” Kira exclaims, making the girls laugh as you structure her form “Dark Shadow is just dreamy” she swoons as Dark Shadow waves at her from across the room.

“And how about you y/n? Do you like Tokoyami maybeeee?” Hagakure’s singsong voice makes you laugh “yeah, he’s really kind, and very interesting. But my plan is just to wait and see if anyone likes me, before i make up my mind” “ARE WE GOING TO START THIS OR WHAT?” Bakugou shouts as he walks into the room, making everyone chuckle and Mina pop to her feet “OKay guys buckle up! It’s a scary one tonight!” Mina gets it set up and then takes her place on the floor on her stomach, the place to your right staying empty.

“Dark Shadow wants to sit next to Kira” Tokoyami says while avoiding your eye contact shyly and you smile “of course!” you pat the seat and he sits beside you stiffly, nervously “but Kira is too bright for the movie so if you want i can make her like a shadow in the dark, the opposite of light.” Kira is one step ahead of you as she pulls a little power from you to phase herself as someone puts out the lights “now SHUT IT” Bakugou shouts again as the movie begins, ominous music filling the room.

“No no no” you whispered under your breath as the guy in the movie ran straight down the same path the murderer was on, you put your hands in front of your face, looking through your fingers as the music gets even more intense. The moment you see the knife moving your body is turning of its own volition, into the shoulder of the boy on your right, a scared gasp leaving your mouth.

“Are you okay?” he asks quietly and you nod into him “is it over?” you whisper back, and he nods “yeah” you chuckle and move your head up to meet his eye “sorry, Tokoyami” you go back to watching the movie but the action is repeated every time someone dies, soon your hand finds his under your blanket that had got tossed over you both and Hagakure to your left. He’d squeeze it every time the scene ended to let you know it was over, you felt your heart race every time.

When the movie ended you stayed there, holding his hand under your blanket as your friends crawled around the couch to discuss the craziness of that movie, “i did not expect that the killer was actually the aunt of the boy’s friend he lived with in college, total TWIST”Mina talking absolute nonsense as you chuckled, Hagakure leaning against you “but that fireman was so handsome, i need to look that actor up online.”

Tokoyami was talking to Todoroki on the other side of the couch, where he was sitting on a table chair, Tokoyami explaining the strange twist that Todoroki didn’t understand, absentmindedly squeezinng you hand every once in a while as he spoke. Your thumb brushes against his and he remembers that he’s holding your hand. My god, he’s holding your hand. How did he get so lucky.

Kira had a form again, comforting Dark Shadow about him being scared when the house was on fire. your heart felt warm, you felt truly at home in this small, second family, you had made at school, you were truly lucky to be having these experiences.

#mha tokoyami #tokoyami fukimage #tokoyami x reader #tokoyami x y/n #tokoyami fluff #Tokoyami x you #mha fanfiction #mha imagines #Tokoyami fanfiction #tokoyami imagine #mha x you #bnha x you #Dark shadow x OC

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cherrylng · 17 days ago

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History Interview #01 - Muse [CROSSBEAT Special Edition - Muse (July 2010)]

"I think it's important to keep an open mind and listen to everything, to get in touch with what's happening in the world, past and present, and to develop what you create"

Just 21 years old—Muse already exuded a calmness that was unusual for a newcomer at the time of their debut, their first interview in 2000.

Interview - Sumi Imai

At the age of 14, Matthew joined the band of his secondary school classmate Dominic (drums). Two years later, Chris (bass) joined the band, which became the original Muse and continues to this day. We caught up with Matthew after he had been back home for a while, amidst a packed schedule of European tour dates.

Wow (laughs). I heard that they played songs by Mega City 4 and Senseless Things. 「Yeah, Dom's band used to play that kind of stuff, and we used to cover other British indie bands like Ned's Atomic Dustbin and Wedding Present. I started learning those songs when I joined that band.」

“They feel frustrated by the material world. Art and music express our emotions and show us that there is more to life than material things”

I see. But when you went to the US, you were greeted with limousines and champagne, which is unbelievable hospitality for a new British band. 「Hahahahaha (laughs), yeah, yeah.」

But when we get too big, for example, there are some things we can't control. Like the suffering that fame brings, not to mention the example of Kurt Cobain…… 「Yeah……」

Also, I don't know if you've seen this, but from the Radiohead documentary video— 「Yeah, I've seen about half of it.」

Yes, that's right. When you said that, you also said, “But if you see us live, you'll see that Muse is more of a rock band”, 「Yeah, it's just that if you see us live, you can better understand what we actually sound like as a band. On the record we're more experimental, we use different instruments, we sound like a five or six-piece [band], but live it's just the three of us, and I think the emotion hits you harder. And we're definitely from a different generation (to Radiohead)…… So I think we're appealing to a different generation.」

Translator's Note: If you're wondering where you've read this before, it's because it's the same interview that I've translated months ago.

The version on the Special Edition is different in that it has been edited and some questions and answers have been omitted out. I decided that doing said edit is too much effort and just copy and paste the whole thing instead.

Please do support me with my ko-fi! ☕

#Matt Bellamy #Muse #Muse band #Showbiz era #smol meerkat #my scan #translation #interview #CROSSBEAT #CROSSBEAT Special Edition

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galindathrop · 1 year ago

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Eras Tour Setlist and Surprise Songs - International Leg (as of August 25, 2023)

Taylor Swift

Tim McGraw

Picture to Burn

Teardrops on My Guitar

A Place in this World

Cold as You

The Outside

Tied Together with a Smile

Stay Beautiful

Should’ve Said No

Mary’s Song

Our Song

I’m Only Me When I’m with You

Invisible

A Perfectly Good Heart

Fearless (Taylor’s Version)

Fearless

Fifteen

Love Story

Hey Stephen

White Horse

You Belong With Me

Breathe (feat. Colbie Callait)

Tell Me Why

You’re Not Sorry

The Way I Loved You

Forever & Always

The Best Day

Change

Jump Then Fall

Untouchable

Come In with the Rain

Superstar

The Other Side of the Door

Today Was a Fairytale

You All Over Me (feat. Maureen Morris)

Mr. Perfectly Fine

We Were Happy

That’s When (feat. Keith Urban)

Don’t You

Bye Bye Baby

If This Was a Movie - June 23

Speak Now (Taylor’s Version)

Mine

Sparks Fly

Back to December

Speak Now

Dear John

Mean

The Story of Us

Never Grow Up

Enchanted

Better than Revenge

Innocent

Haunted

Last Kiss

Long Live (added to setlist on July 7th for the release of Speak Now TV. Performed on the same koi fish guitar from the Speak Now Tour)

Ours

Superman

Electric Touch (featuring Fall Out Boy)

When Emma Falls in Love

I Can See You (music video released to concertgoers on July 7 and online on July 8)

Castles Crumbling (featuring Hayley Williams) - July 28

Foolish One

Timeless - July 14

Red (Taylor’s Version)

State of Grace

Red

Treacherous

I Knew You Were Trouble

I Almost Do

We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together

Stay Stay Stay

The Last Time (featuring Gary Lightbody of Snow Patrol)

Holy Ground

Sad Beautiful Tragic

The Lucky One

Everything Has Changed (featuring Ed Sheeran)

Starlight

Begin Again

The Moment I Knew

Come Back… Be Here

Girl at Home

Ronan

Better Man

Nothing New (featuring Phoebe Bridgers) (added to the setlist on May 5, only to be performed when Phoebe Bridgers is one of the opening acts.)

Babe

Message in a Bottle

I Bet You Think About Me (featuring Chris Stapleton)

Forever Winter

Run (featuring Ed Sheeran)

The Very First Night

All Too Well (10 Minute Version)

Eyes Open

Safe and Sound

1989 (Taylor’s Version) - Announced August 8th, 2023. TBR on October 27, 2023

Welcome to New York

Blank Space

Style

Out of the Woods

All You Had to Do Was Stay

Shake It Off

I Wish You Would

Bad Blood

Wildest Dreams

How You Get the Girl

This Love

I Know Places

Clean

Wonderland

You Are in Love

New Romantics

Reputation

…Ready for It?

End Game (featuring Ed Sheeran and Future)

I Did Something Bad

Don’t Blame Me

Delicate

Look What You Made Me Do

So It Goes…

Gorgeous

Getaway Car

King of My Heart

Dancing with Our Hands Tied

Dress

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

Call It What You Want

New Year’s Day

I Don’t Want to Live Forever

Lover

I Forgot That You Existed - August 24

Cruel Summer

Lover

The Man

The Archer

I Think He Knows

Miss Americana & the Heartbreak Prince

Paper Rings

Cornelia Street

Death by a Thousand Cuts

London Boy

Soon You’ll Get Better (featuring The Chicks)

False God

You Need to Calm Down

Afterglow

Me! (feat. Brendon Urie of Panic! at the Disco)

It’s Nice to Have a Friend

Daylight

Beautiful Ghosts

Only the Young

All of the Girls You Loved Before

Folklore

The 1

Cardigan

The Last Great American Dynasty

Exile (featuring Bon Iver)

My Tears Ricochet

Mirrorball

Seven (spoken transition part of setlist)

August

This Is Me Trying

Illicit Affairs

Invisible String

Mad Woman

Epiphany

Betty

Peace

Hoax

The Lakes

Evermore

Willow

Champagne Problems

Gold Rush

‘Tis the Damn Season

Tolerate It

No Body, No Crime (feat. Haim)

Happiness

Dorothea

Coney Island (feat. the National)

Ivy

Cowboy Like Me

Long Story Short

Marjorie

Closure

Evermore (feat. Bon Iver)

Right Where You Left Me

It’s Time to Go

Midnights

Lavender Haze

Maroon

Anti-Hero

Snow on the Beach (feat. Lana Del Rey)

You’re on Your Own, Kid

Midnight Rain

Question…?

Vigilante Shit

Bejeweled

Labyrinth

Karma

Sweet Nothing - August 24

Mastermind

The Great War

Bigger Than the Whole Sky

Paris

High Infidelity

Glitch

Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve

Dear Reader

Hits Different

Karma (featuring Ice Spice) (Music video released for concertgoers on May 26 and online on May 27)

You’re Losing Me (From the Vault)

#tayor swift #the eras tour #jessielynnposts #im restarting this... i hope this is ok

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willowistic22 · 4 years ago

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Famous!newsies

Ok so here are my famous!newsies headcanons from an a modern au i thought of if newsies were celebrities/famous yknow bcs I couldn’t get this idea out of my head and idk what to do with it other than making a headcanon list nabsnzbsvsnsbz anyways hope yall validate me after not posting any original content for like…. awhile now hehe

btw it got longer than expected. And I mean r e a l l y long. So if yall wanna read this better sit down and buckle up!

Jack

He’s an artist on youtube

Like a modern day bob ross ig??

If yall know zhc on youtube just imagine that but not so rich (I don’t watch zhc btw but i do know that he does custom art on iphones and stuff and that is definitely not jack kelly)

Anyways Jack simply goes by Jack Kelly.

So jack does art challenges. Like does the weirdest requests from his fans left in his comment section and stuff

Or maybe challenging himself to make art from a specific theme or a specific media

Sometimes he vlogs too but his art videos are what his fans like the most

His merch is amazing because he designed the pattern/drawing/whatever yknow. It’s printed/sewed/whatever on the clothing and it’s good quality. It’s pretty lowkey for a youtuber’s merch bcs jack doesn’t like those merch that just smacks his logo on a hoodie

Davey

He’s a fantasy, YA, romance writer (he mixes it wisely ok?)

And goes by David Jacobs

Listen he’s a hopeless romantic and i’m pretty sure yall agree too

He wanted to stick to YA romance. The classic high school lovers yknow

But he wanted to challenge himself since he’s been writing about high school lovers since he was in high school

Thus the fantasy genre came in mind

So yeah he likes creating love in his own universe

Whether it’d be different worlds, universe, species, time periods, whatever.

He wanted to direct the movies based on his books, but he’s actually lowkey terrible at leading on his own. But he did stick to being the script writer and co-director (look idk how it works in the film industry i’m just making shit up)

Crutchie

He’s a solo jazz singer

Crutchie gives off Michael Buble and Jason Mraz vibes tho

And maybe a bit of frank sinatra? Yknow ‘cause he sings jazz

Also he riffs thank you very much :)

He goes by Crutchie Morris to everyone

He usually plays the acoustic guitar or piano on stage

Ok but he’s like really good with the piano

Makes the best jokes on stage too. Some are just sarcastic comments.

Crutchie asking through the microphone : “Oh, straight?”

A fan he’s talking to from the crowd : “Uhh… no, gay”

Crutchie : “no not you, the vodka”

Everyone at the concert : *laughs*

Crutchie, jokingly : “Oh, you’re drinking vodka! Straight? No gay”

(yes that was indeed inspired by that one video of Harry Styles and a fan in one of his concerts yall can’t stop me)

Kathrine

She’s a crime mystery writer

Think like the modern day Agatha Christie

Okok but she goes by Kathrine Plumber on her books :D

She chooses that genre bcs she’s a huge fan of Agatha Christie

Her favorite book from Agatha is Murder on the Orient Express

Oh and her books are sometime very gruesome alkjsfhakjsfb

Nobody check her browsing history, she’ll look like a murderer

Ok but I feel like she also has a youtube channel about books and stuff and sometimes like to vlog

She also has a writing tips series on her channel where she shares tips on some of the frequently asked questions about writing or her fans leave a specific question in the comment section and thought she could expand more to it in a full length video

Also she likes to vlog while she’s in a book convention

Her books are also turned into movies and she has done a great job directing it

Race

Yall would be lying to me if you don’t think this kid would end up being a twitch streamer and youtuber (like vlogging yknow. I feel like his gaming stuff would strictly be on twitch)

And ik it’s widely agreed by everyone in the fandom that he’s a dancer of some sort so yeah he’s also simultaneously a dancer

I don’t think I need to explain any further bcs it’s just so in character

He goes by Racetrack Higgins

Ok so he likes to vlog on his youtube channel

Sometimes does stupid challenges

Maybe he’d drag Albert to do a challenge which he always says no

“I’ll just be your cameraman dude, dw”

Race : *angery*

Since Al and Smalls are the skateboard peeps™ race is the rollerblade dude™ bcs I say so

He has three cats named Racecat Higgins, Spot Clawlon, and Romeow (i’ve mentioned it before and I will mention it again hehe) and his fans loves them endlessly

Albert

You don’t think this kid would also end up being a twitch streamer and youtuber like his bestie up there?? Lmao you thought wrong (again, gaming is strictly on his twitch)

He just goes by Albert DaSilva on the internet

And yes he’s also a dancer because I say so

On his Youtube channel he also vlogs

Half of his vlogs starts with him riding his skateboard

“Hey, guys! Welcome back to another vlog-” *falls off his skateboard for not paying attention to a curb*

It happens way more often than he’d like to admit let’s be real. His fans make a compilation of it and memes on reddit

Always wear a snapback

Snapbacks are an important element to him so his merch store is really boosting his snapbacks

And just for the wormsie discord server he has one with the word ranga on it after it being born from a stupid inside joke he, race, and both of their fanbases combined share (@ my wormsie fam thank me later)

Oh yeah, his youtube besties are Race and Smalls just so we’re clear here :) (I’ll get to Smalls in a bit)

So I always headcanon Albert having two big dobermans. So his fans always want to see a doggy update because Zara and Zoey are everything to them.

Doggo vlogs are fun. It’s usually Albert taking the two good girls to Central Park for playtime or teaching them new tricks

Spot

He’s a solo rock singer

Is an amazing singer like wow none of the newsies expected him to have that sort of pipes to reach high notes

And he does it amazingly with no sweat

Also his instrument is the electric guitar to go with his amazing singing ajsfhasjfhajhf

Anyways he goes by Spot Conlon still

And his songs are very lyrical. Like very.

A lot of metaphors. No one knows what most of his songs means.

So basically Taylor Swift songs if it switched genres to rock. And not even like songs from speak now or red. But like if evermore and folklore songs were to turn into rock songs with a little bit of reputation vibes sprinkled on top. And his concerts has the reputation era vibes but make it spot conlon (hey non swiftie fans reading this i’m so sorry i’m pretty sure yall don’t understand wtf i’m talking abt)

That is also the only way i know to describe his vibe i’m sorry but i don’t really listen to a lot of rock alkjhfasjk

Anyways it’s a known fact that he wears tank tops daily that it becomes his signature look. And also an inside joke among his fanbase

Now just picture the merch booth from one of his shows and there’s like endless tank top designs for his fans to pick and choose

He’s also crowned to be the King of Brooklyn bcs of obvious reasons

But the joke is he’s a pretty tough hardcore guy that’s a cat person

Sarah

She’s a badass female solo singer

Mostly does pop but the badass type of pop

Yes, she does go by Sarah Jacobs

Fans were really surprised Davey and Sarah are related

Because one is a hopeless romantic while the other is a total badass

Anyways she gives off Little mix, Ariana Grande, Taylor Swift, and Selena Gomez vibes

That is literally the only way I can describe it

She’s very lyrical, with a lot of metaphors

When she dances on stage, she d a n c e s

All while holding a mic to sing. And she hits all those high notes like it’s no ones business (a literal queen i tell you)

She and Spot are besties and has been known to have done a few collabs together

Their fans were hesitant about their collabs since their genre is pretty different from the other but they make it work and it slAPS

And among all her boppy songs with full choreography and backup singers, she always have a few songs she sings while only being accompanied by piano or guitar (Either electric or acoustic) which she plays on her own

Finch

He’s an indie pop artist with his trusted acoustic guitar by his side

Just think of music by Wallows and Lewis Capaldi were to be blended in together and Conan Gray for the cherry on top

But it has a little bit of Ed sheeran, Lorde, and Lauv vibes to it too

His concerts are simple but his songs are mostly very boppy so his fans still have fun either way

And it’s usually in small venues but there are times where he had a concert in a huge stadium

He goes by FINCH (yeah all caps btw)

Finches are a very on brand thing for him obviously

Has been known to collab with Crutchie and they actually make a very good team

Somehow was able to combined both genres to produce a few boppy songs

Ok ok but Finch and Crutchie have made a collaborative album (and maybe they went on tour????)

Specs

He’s a history fiction writer

Yes this is inspired by the fact that he’s 100% a history nerd (no one change my mind i love this headcanon aight)

And he explores a lot of different histories from different parts of the world

He actually helps a lot of students understand history even further for school through his novels

Anyways he goes by Specs because I say so

No one knows why that’s his pseudonym and Specs isn’t interested in explaining either. No one other than the newsies need to know it was born from a stupid nickname the newsies gave him :)

His research mostly comes from history books because of his genre which wouldn’t be a problem since he has loads and will voluntarily buy more if needed

Also yeah he makes a great director for the movies taken from his books

Mush

He’s a chef on youtube

Goes by Mush Meyers

So think if Gordon Ramsey and his youtube channel but make it mush

Yeah that’s it really

Ok but Mush is a jolly and friendly person

Other than just food vlogging he does cooking challenges and cooking tips too

Sometimes he does the cooking challenges with a friend (mostly henry but i’ll get to him later on in the list)

But he also vlogs his life

Which isn’t really often but he likes to sometimes

He’s that big of a foodie he has a food blog too

And also a seafood restaurant so that’s cool :D

Henry

Like Mush, he’s a chef on youtube

Goes by Henry on the internet and in general

Ajkfhajfjska I’m thinking about how ppl would address him as Chef Henry kajhfkjlashfjklasfjklsf

He mostly does the same thing like Mush actually

Food vlogging and cooking challenges (they do it together so) sometimes cooking tips

But Henry vlogs his life a lot

And instead of a food instagram he has a food blog

He has a sandwich restaurant

Yeah it is inspired by his pastrami on rye with a sour pickle line from KONY get mad about it why don’t ya (well if i’m not mistaken henry was the one that said it but idk i have horrible memory)

Blink

He’s a youtuber

Ok so I have a specific headcanon that Blink majored in psychology but didn’t end up being a psychologist

So instead he becomes a psychologist on youtube

Who often vlogs jhgasjlfhs

The guy looks like he could cut you but his sense of humor once you get him talking is just *chef’s kiss* amazing

Which is why he also has a podcast because he’s also secretly great at talking

He just thinks mental health is very important, okay?

Romeo

He’s an actor

Mostly on Broadway but has worked with Hollywood before

He’s usually a supporting character but has been known to understudy for main characters

Ok ik these bullet points are getting shorter and shorter but these are mostly bcs some of these stuff are pretty self explanatory since it’s very in character

Like are you telling me a kid named Romeo isn’t gonna be in some way very dramatic and end up turning that personality trait into his career?? Plus he’s very good at that?

Yeah you’re lying to me

Also he’s a pretty frequent vlogger on youtube

Look he’s a fun guy, what did you expect?

Just goes by Romeo on youtube

Elmer

He’s an actor

Has done his fair share in Broadway and Hollywood but started in Broadway

He can dance but thinks he’s pretty average in it yknow

Which his fans has no idea what he’s talking about because on stage he can do flips and turns like it’s no ones business yknow

But he can sing really good and takes pride in it

Elmer would play characters that is really far off from his own personality that fans couldn’t believe that Elmer played that character

He has done his fair share in main characters and supporting characters on Broadway

In Hollywood he usually does indie and rom-com movies

Buttons

He’s a fashion youtuber and basically an influencer

Let’s be real this boy is a fashion icon

He’s not really a model but more like a fashion influencer and also kind of a fashion designer

His clothing line is very *chefs kiss* amazing

He designed it all and sometimes likes to design for his friends as well

He also does fashion tips on his youtube channel

His instagram game is god tier level (along with Tommy Boy and Sniper I’ll get to them in a bit)

But yeah he also vlogs

And goes by Buttons Davenport

Jojo

He’s an actor

Mostly on Broadway but has done a few movies in Hollywood

He radiates main character energy and he does become the main character most of the time (on hollywood at least)

On Broadway he mostly enjoys being apart of the ensemble because this boy loves dancing

But he does play a few supporting characters

He has released one or two albums too because his singing is top tier

But isn’t interested in doing a lot of live concerts with his albums

Since no one has the time to say Josephino Jorgelino De La Guerra he turned it into Jojo De La Guerra (so much for ‘a special nickname only for friends and family’)

Mike and Ike

They’re a pop boy band and bcs of my lack of creativity it’s called Mike and Ike

At the start of their career :

“My name goes first because I’m older than you!” - Mike

“You’re only older than me by 13 minutes, holy shit!” - Ike

But Ike slowly accepts the fact that it’ll be like this yknow

Anyways they’re pretty great singers

They have one direction and new hope club vibes

Tho unlike one direction they can dance (i love the boys alright but i really think it’s funny that they can’t dancelkhjjlh)

They like to switch from the guitar (electric and/or acoustic) to the piano

The amount of times their name is confused by the candy is too many

But they like it like that lol

Anyways i’ve mentioned a headcanon where Mike has tattoos (not like from head to toe but it’s fairly noticeable to everyone) and Ike has piercings

So the only way their fans tell them apart is by that

But there are times where Mike has his tattoos covered or Ike took his piercings off in public alone. A fan mistakens them for the other twin but they still respond to the other name because they don’t feel like there’s a need to correct them since they’re mostly known by Mike and Ike anyways. When the fan posts it on instagram and tags the twin they thought it was the twin that was tagged would comment “wrong twin but nice pic you two”

Happens wayyyyy too many times. Their fans are officially scared to approach one of the two in public alone without their differentiating indicators on which is which

And yes it is widely known that they argue a lot when it comes to writing songs

Nothing out of the ordinary sibling squabble yknow but it’s a lot

But they do end up finding a solution to the topic of their argument and make a good team at the end of the day

Hotshot

He’s an actor

On Broadway, he’s one of those actor’s that is mostly good in just the acting and singing

He can’t dance to save his life sjdfghaf

So Jeremy Jordan yknow asj;oghajshf

No not really. He can dance a little bit

So he’s mostly the main character

But he’s widely known for his works in Hollywood

He does a lot of drama. Think stuff like Elite and Designated Survivor. Yeah those kinds of heavy drama (well idk i think those two are pretty heavy)

He wants to release his own music because he’s a pretty good singer but he can’t write songs to save his life either jgnjafjasf

And all the demo songs he was suggested by producers isn’t his cup of tea

So he’s no singer ladies and gents ://

The name Hotshot is used to name his social media platforms. He always adds a description in his bio’s that Hotshot is a nickname his friends and family use so his fans and the media refer to him with his name

I headcanon Hotshot’s real name is Tyler or some sort. No don’t ask me what’s his last name is because idk either lol

Sniper

She’s a model, beauty and fashion youtuber (I’m pretty sure those are two different things tho idk i don’t watch youtube religiously anymore), and just an influencer in general

Instagram game on p o i n t

I know most beauty youtubers go by their names but uhh… i don’t think i’ve ever thought of a first name for Sniper but I really think she really would just go by Sniper Wah on the internet (Idk she seems like an Ashley in my head but feel free to recommend headcanon names to me)

Anyways she’s very fashionable

Tommy Boy (i’ll get to him just wait aight?) and Buttons are her fashion besties

The three of them pretty much appear in each other’s Youtube video not Tommy’s tho bcs he doesn’t have one lol

Sniper’s brand are huge sun hats

I have no idea how or why but that girl has sun hats vibes I can’t explain any further I’m sorry

Doesn’t have a clothing line but does have a make up brand of her own. She calls it Sniper. Yeah that’s it akjfhjf

Smalls

She’s a twitch streamer and youtuber like race and albert

They’re a youtube trio everyone loves it

And yes she does go by Smalls

Oh and she also dances like her two stupid besties thanks for asking

Bubblegum is her brand (idk how to explain she just has the vibe)

She is skateboard chick

I’m imagining a video collab of her and Al on a skatepark doing stupid challenges

It’s her most viewed video

Tommy Boy

Ok ok he’s a model, influencer, and dancer

So think a male version of Gigi Hadid that dances

No he doesn’t have a youtube channel but frequently has made an appearance on Buttons’ and Sniper’s videos

Yes his instagram feed is also very amazing

He goes by Tommy Boy

People genuinely thinking ‘Boy’ is actually his last name and kinda think it’s strange but doesn’t complain

Tommy literally didn’t think people would think it was his last name. But they did anyways

Les

Let’s just get straight to the point : he’s a famous tiktoker

And yes, ppl are surprised at the fact that him, Davey, and Sarah are related to each other

To the people that made it through this entire list. Congratulations and thank you for your validation. Have a wonderful evening and stay hydrated

i will write at least one oneshot out of this au i promise!!

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sinceileftyoublog · 3 years ago

Text

Philippe Cohen Solal & Mike Lindsay: A Pop Tribute to Outsider Art

From Left: Mike Linsday, Hannah Peel, Philippe Cohen Solal, Adam Glover; Artwork by Gabriel Jacquel

BY JORDAN MAINZER

Outsider visual artist and writer Henry Darger’s fame was essentially happenstance, so it’s fitting that Philippe Cohen Solal’s decades-long obsession with Darger is chock full of coincidence. In 2003, the member of longtime neotango group Gotan Project found himself with a day off on tour in New York City and decided to venture over to the American Folk Art Museum, a choice that would change his life and culminate in Outsider (¡Ya Basta!), April’s collaborative album with Tunng’s Mike Linsday, the first adaptation of Darger’s words in music.

At the museum, Solal, unaware not only of Darger but of outsider art in general, saw a Darger work, and, as he told me over the phone earlier this year, “fell in love.” Looking closer at the details of the work, he saw something he recognized: the name Kiyoko Lerner, who had lent the work to the museum. The very same name of a woman he was set to meet the next day in Chicago as recommended by a mutual friend back in Paris. The friend suggested they meet due to their love of tango. “We met and talked a bit about tango,” he said, “but quickly, I asked her about Henry Darger.” She began to tell him exactly who she was, the story that’s become increasingly well-known in the annals of Chicago cultural history.

Lerner and her late husband Nathan (himself a prominent Chicago photographer) were Darger’s landlords; Nathan discovered Darger’s work in his “very messy room” shortly before Darger’s death in 1973, most notably his 15,000+ page novel In The Realms of the Unreal as well as his magazine-traced illustrations and watercolors accompanying the book. (The book, a fantastical epic about child slave rebellions, would go on to inspire visual artists and musicians for decades; indie rock band Vivian Girls took their name from characters in the book, and Darger would even be referenced in The Venture Bros.) Nathan immediately knew he had something special, and he and his wife took control of Darger’s estate. Darger would start to become formally recognized by the art world, his work prominently featured in museums and documentaries. Nathan died in 1997, and Kiyoko would continue to operate as head of the estate and donate her collection to various museums across the world.

In 2006, Kiyoko flew to Paris and met up with Solal at the first Darger exhibition in the city, at La Maison Rouge. It was immediately when he left the show that Solal had the idea to make music inspired by Darger’s art. “At the time, I didn’t [even] know that [Darger] wrote lyrics,” Solal said. “I had no clue.” In reference to Darger’s war between children and adults, Solal had the idea to write “adult music for children,” or vice versa, and wrote a track that wouldn’t even end up 15 years later on Outsider. He visited Kiyoko at her Chicago apartment. “I spent a few days immersed in his art. I didn’t know precisely what I wanted to do, and then I discovered he wrote lyrics. It very much changed the project.” Nobody had thought to put Darger’s lyrics to music, and Solal wanted to put his stamp on the increasingly large pool of reinterpretations of or references to Darger in the arts and culture world at large. Kiyoko put him in touch with art historian Michael Bonesteel, who led Solal to more lyrics.

Not wanting to go at it alone, Solal got the idea to do a collective project adapting Darger’s lyrics to music with various friends. He reached out to the likes of Calexico’s Joey Burns and Lambchop’s Kurt Wagner, but Lindsay was the one who really stuck. Solal and Lindsay were fans of each other’s bands, and the latter visited the American Folk Art Museum while on tour at Solal’s recommendation, he himself rediscovering Darger’s work. In 2015, there was another Darger retrospective at the Paris Museum of Modern Art, and Kiyoko, who attended, suggested to Solal that he reveal his song adaptations of Darger. “I didn’t tell her I only had one song at the time,” he laughed. That was his inspiration to reach out to Lindsay. “I thought maybe I’d do a 5-track EP. I called Mike and reminded him of my project and asked him, ‘Are you ready to work on that with me?’”

Solal and Lindsay separately wrote the melodies and basic arrangements of the songs that would end up on Outsider, and they recorded and produced the record together. Lindsay introduced Solal to Northern Irish musician/singer/multi-instrumentalist Hannah Peel, who would voice the Vivian Girls. Solal asked Adam Glover, a singer he knew through his manager, to be the voice of Darger himself. (“He was very young...but he can sing like Sinatra or Dean Martin,” Solal said.) The four created an album with Darger’s words using traditional pop instrumentation and song structures but also children’s instruments; Peel even created her own music box to play some of the melodies. Sometimes, the words were spoken, as on “Hark Hark, My Friend, Cannon Thunders Are Swelling”, while other times the vocals are isolated in harmony, as on “We Sigh For The Child Slaves”. “We know more about Darger as a painter and visual artist, so it was important to have Darger as a storyteller,” Solal said. Furthermore, the group wanted to capture the raw spirit of Darger’s art by rendering the voices distorted, shifting their pitch to make them sound almost out of tune. The instrumentation, meanwhile, ranges from slinky electric guitars to strings, and even barroom-style piano on the penultimate “We’ll Never Say Goodby” [sic]. “With our small team, it was lean and simple to do this music,” said Solal. While most of the titles and words were taken directly from Darger, down to the spelling of “Goodby”, the album touches on Solal’s story, too. Instrumental interlude “851 Webster Avenue” is named after the address of Lerner’s apartment Solal visited for the first time, when his fascination with Darger really took off.

Solal can’t exactly pinpoint what ever fascinated him about Darger, both in general and as the world changes, but he has some clues. “At the time, what was interesting to me was it was clear [Darger] was a self-taught artist, and maybe I felt a bit moved by that because I’m a self-taught musician,” Solal said. “I never went to music school, but I understood that without any specific art education or practice at an art school, you can create something...Henry Darger is an amazing example of someone who created his own world.” Darger’s style of illustration, his drawings traced from magazines, made up for the fact that he wasn’t a technically great drawer, and it complemented his heightened sense of color. Moreover, Solal feels kinship with some aspects of Darger’s childhood. Part of the inspiration for In The Realms of the Unreal was that Darger himself was sent to an asylum that put children to work. “When he was a kid, everybody called him crazy,” said Solal, “But I’m sure he didn’t think he was crazy. I remember when I was 9 or 10, I thought I was crazy. Nobody called me crazy, but I thought I was.” He found commonalities in, simply, being misunderstood.

Solal also questions what it means to be an “outsider” artist; in reality, Darger spent most of his time inside, confined in a room creating fictional worlds. Funny enough, according to his diaries, he was fascinated with the weather, tracking the accuracy of the predicted versus actual weather, but that’s about all for the outside world. On the day JFK was killed, for instance, Darger had nothing about it in his diary entry. He chose to interact with the world through the magazines he would trace, and through collections of items like Pepto Bismol bottles, National Geographic issues, and broken glasses. He wasn’t much for interpersonal relationships. Not only was Nathan Lerner unaware of Darger’s artistic enterprises, but neither were the young artist couple with whom Darger actually shared his apartment. Solal thinks that Darger’s resistance to presenting himself as an artist was as a result of his childhood experiences. “If the outside world was not so mean to him, maybe he’d be less scared to show who he was to the rest of the world, even just to his neighbors,” he said. “It’s funny that we call him an outsider. He was more an insider but was protecting himself from the outside world.”

Perhaps, subconsciously, the more that creative folks learn to look through Darger’s eyes, the less likely his, or any genius goes unnoticed. Solal remarked that many of the folks involved in Outsider almost had to “unlearn” their craft. Andrew Scheps, who mixed the album, at first didn’t know the context and gave Solal and Lindsay a product that was “too clean;” Lindsay explained Darger’s story and the importance of having strange-sounding narrative effects in the records. “When he worked [after that] on the mix, we found Henry was back in our songs,” said Solal. The individuals involved in coming up with animated videos for each of these songs, French animator Gabriel Jacquel with art direction by Pascal Gary (aka Phormazero), also had to abandon their fundamentals and learn to draw like Darger. Overall, exploring his work provides admirers like Solal the opportunity to dig deeper, from figuring out how to bring Outsider on stage to “finding new ways to tell the story,” like podcasts, interactive maps, short films, and Spotify playlists of Darger’s favorite music. “This man is full of mysteries,” he said. “I hope my future is Outsider for a while.”

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