#kibou talks way too fucking much

[sunset-bridge]

I agree completely but i iwant you to elaborate anyeaha

-chai gay sex giy(ps i haveca migraine so that is why i cant typw)

MR CHAI GAY SEX in my askbox. no fucking way.....! ai generated. also i hope your migraine clears soon friend : (

anyways AHEM.

ok well. ocd... is the obsession disorder. i think you can already percieve some of this . what with how Obsession is such a theme with goro. Obsession with the Protagonist Obsession with Revenge Obsession with Perfection.

i think he could have pure O ocd. for anyone that doesnt know, pure O ocd is when you only have the obsessions but not physical compulsions. ex: i have an obsession about my house burning down but instead of doing any physical rituals like checking the stove or jumping up and down or pacing around etc. etc . i just. do mental obsessions, like repeating a phrase, counting to a number, arguing with my brain why my house WONT burn down for 4353 hours etc.

he could very well also have classic OCD but... frankly with how little time he would have to make any compulsions due to his frantic public life, im almost certain that 99% of them are mental.

OCPD (Obsessive Compulsive PERSONALITY disorder) is also a candidate for an additional disorder. for anyone that isnt familiar, this disorder is what most people would think as being a "perfectionist" or a "control freak". but to a degree where its obsessive and damaging to your quality of life. its common for it to couple with classic OCD (haha me...) and the combo is quite... devastating.

anyways. i just think the way he doubts his own convictions after meeting the protag is very ocd like.. he tries so hard to not recognize them and to convince himself hes right. he cant be wrong. he CANT AFFORD TO BE WRONG. not about his whole self! nnot about everything he stands for! it would hurt so deeply to be told you been doing it wrong your whole life.. that your core of thinking is wrong..resonates with me.. although for him specifically it would also be real event ocd (when a thing ACTUALLY happened in the past and your obsessions are about this thing etc and any implications. repeating events in your head and analyzing them ad nauseum etc) . i also think the sunk cost thing applied at some point absolutely 100% like. you dedicated your life to this plan. and you want to stop now??? no way. you already put so much into it. got to see it through. you're right. everyone else is wrong. they have to be.everything is hinging on this. no no. its just an intrusive thought. you're right. you have to be. if not, then what the hell was everything for!!

AND ALSO. how he is so. obsessive over maintaning his public image. ofc its for his plan but the feeling still applies. he Needs to be aware of everything always Everything must go according to plan Every detail must be perfect . I need to know what you Expect so i can perform correctly. You will never catch me off guard. I will be in control I need to Be the ONE in control of my life. etc. and so forth

also just the way his life is fleeting away being obsessed with his whole revenge spiral while he kinda gets more fucked up in his brain inside his skull day by day without saying anything to anyone. none of these people know etc...

very ocd core of his part. reminds me of my lowest moments where it felt like i was gonna die in the corner of my room but everything was happening in my brain. i felt like someone was stabbing me with a knife and twisting it inside. but no one else could see (this is not me being dramatic it really just Feels like That. very frustrating. a lot of people with ocd and other anxiety disorders can agree that they cause physical symptoms..)

and yeah his catharsis moment at shidos palace ... yeah...the raw emotion and the cruelty of reality hitting you in the face... everything you lived for and all of your ideals were wrong. this is my worst nightmare. i dont think i could be as strong.

thank you for listening to me! i shall go to sleep.

EDIT ALSO. r/ocdmemes moment

case closed

[agalnamedlunasea]

If you're still doing the character ask meme thing

Ibuki and/or Nagito

Hi friend id be happy to talk more lol

Imma do both bc why not

Ibuki first ummm

Fave thing about her is I LOVE her energy. She's so happy and cheerful and honestly emotionally intelligent and confident in herself, and I love that

No least fave thing I think... I like everything about her... I don't have her album that's my least favorite thing

Favorite line

I really fucking love this line, its so great. I adore. Either this one or the one where she calls hajime a cunt lol

Brotp NAGITO IBUKI BESTIES FOREVER like actually fr. They’d be such powerful besties, I think ibuki would be a good, understanding friend to him, and kind but insistent enough to break through his walls. Also kazuichi, theyd be so powerful, she could help him de-grease his personality, he could totally roll with her music

Otp: im a BIG fan of ibuki x women lol. I don't really have any particular ships for her over any others. I like basically every ship with her and any of the other girls... I also think her and imposter is cute. If I had to pick one probably bandaid? She'd be good w mikan

Notp: I mean again, I like most of her ships, I don't really strongly dislike any ships with her... I guess her and hajime? They'd be funky friends, but I don't think I could see them romantically

Random hc: pretty basic but oh god that girl is adhd as fuck. Also I think it'd be funny if she could handle alcohol really well, like she somehow takes significantly more drinks than any of her friends to get drunk. She'd be a good drunk people babysitter I think

Unpopular opinion... I don't know actually. I feel like ibuki is a pretty well loved character, not much to disagree with

Song I associate with her... am I boring if I say I Squeezed Out the Baby Yet I Have No Idea Who the Father Is by Masuna.

Fave picture is probably the sprite above. She so silly...

NAGITO TIME OH BOY

Favorite thing is honestly probably how internally consistent his ideology is and how deeply that effects him. He is incredibly straightforward and consistent actually, people just miss it bc his values and the lengths he'll go to for them are SO different from other people's. Its so heavily shaped by his unique life experience due to his luck, and it informs so much of his personality.. he's such a unique character that can really only come from danganronpa and I think thats super cool

Least fave thing... idk, he's really infuriating honestly, but in such an interesting way that I can't really hate it. Idk I guess the self-deprication gets tiring

Favorite line: I have too many favorites.. this one is funny though

Brotp: obviously ibuki, as already stated, but tbh i think in a post game/non dispair setting i think he should be friends with all the girls in his class actually. Especially ibuki, Sonia, and hiyoko, they'd all be besties w him i think

Otp y'all already know, komahina my beloved

Notp again y'all already know, anything besides komahina. Especially with women, Especially komanami... I do not enjoy

Random hc: I think post game his sleep schedule is completely out of wack. Bouncing between sleeping too much and not enough, nightmares, constantly exhausted. It takes a while to get back to a relatively healthy place with sleep... the nightmares stick around though

Unpopular opinion... um. My brain is broken, the only one I can think of rn I don't really want to share, so skip

Song: zettai kibou birthday ummm besides the obvious one probably first love/late spring by mitski... kind of a basic choice, but fitting i think

Fave picture

Really I like. Almost every picture of him... so take the first cg of him i could find in my phone

[writer-and-artist27]

Not the Last

Note: This was written as a “What-If” story, in response to the whole KeiKashi wedding prompt Lang ( @langwrites ) did a little while back. I never thought I would write this, but since the idea was lurking in my head for a long time, I felt like I needed to.

I’m guessing you’re asking, “because why? Why did you feel like this to the point of writing?”

Well. For those of you following me, you might’ve heard how Tomoko in S&S originally was, at one point, in consideration for death at Orochimaru’s hands. The whole KeiKashi wedding thing would be a catalyst, unfortunately enough, and well, I needed to write this to prove to myself that’s not going to happen with me as the writer ever and I needed to get this last bit off my chest as a way of moving on. The whole “Tomoko-death-at-Orochimaru” was a result of my innermost insecurities about my and Lang’s initial friendship in the early S&S days, and my social anxiety in general, so writing how it won’t happen is a way of nailing that idea in its coffin for good.

So, this. 

It’s also why the DR thing is kinda on a indefinite hiatus, because the angst that was in there was too big of a wallop to the point of Lang getting worried about my mental health.

Songs referenced in this whole “What-If” thing include marasy’s piano cover of Madoka Magica’s Connect and Mermaid Melody’s Kibou no Kaneoto, in that order.

The theme for this specific thing though? Madoka’s And I’m Home. The original and/or Akio Scenro’s piano version work just fine.

Trigger Warnings are in order for implied anxiety, suicide ideation, death, and depression.

And please, for anyone who feels suicidal, please contact a help hotline or a loved one as soon as you can. You deserve to be here. Just as much as anyone else does.

I wrote this to give that original bad ending of S&S some closure and that sad part of Tomoko a happy ending. You all deserve a happy ending too.

“Do you, Hatake Kakashi, take this woman as your bride?”

Isobu, conducting the ceremony like the proud Tailed Beast he was.

“I do.”

These two had definitely changed for the better from the ninja who glared at each other in my living room so long ago.

“And do you, Gekkō Keisuke, take this man as your husband?”

“I do.”

We were all grown up, huh. I never would have thought two decades ago that Kei would ever say such a thing. But here we were.

Isobu’s large arms, covered in sand and seawater, landed on each side of the soon-to-be married couple with gentle grace, a low rumble sounding in his throat. The eight ninken lined up near the platform were all wagging their tails, and I didn’t miss how Isobu’s large eye met my stare for a moment as he lowered himself to eye level with the rest of the audience. “Then you may kiss. And anyone who would dare voice any objections will not do so, or I will eat them.”

I made sure to smile as brightly as I could back at the Tailed Beast while holding back the urge to cry.

Rin nudged me softly while wiping a happy tear from her eye. “Beautiful. Don’t you think so, Tomo-chan?”

“Yeah,” I said softly. My heart beat against my chest. “It is. I’m glad I got to see this.”

My mind already knew that it might be the last.

No one minded my song choices for Kei and Kakashi’s wedding. A full piano rendition of Connect, because of course I had to honor my roots, and then singing Kibou no Kaneoto.

“Sing this last song…”

The Sound of the Bells of Hope. Love Goes On, was the subtitle.

I wished for so many years that my friends could be happy. And here they were.

Obito and Rin, smiling at one another while dancing on the dance floor.

Gai, crying tears of joy when Genma caught the bouquet in front of Raido.

And my best friends. Kei and Kakashi. They were married, they were smiling, and they were laughing.

They all were happy.

It was why I decided this would be my last concert. My last performance as the Civilian Pianist.

They didn’t need me anymore. It was obvious they all were focused on each other.

So, my job was done, wasn’t it?

My stomach shook from butterflies, but by the time I sang the last verse and stepped off the stage past all the loud applause, clutching my Wayfinder necklace all the while, Isobu was turning an eye at me again. Did he notice?

“Tomoko,” he rumbled, almost too quiet from the sound to be his normal conversational tone. “Where are you going?”

He did notice. Of course.

I never thought in my entire life that I would have the honor of being called by name by Isobu himself. Or the fact that he would want to talk with me without wanting to stomp on me like the insect I was compared to him. Still, I put on a smile and nodded in his direction as a sign of acknowledgement. I heard him. “For a walk, Isobu-san. All the performing and party antics can get to someone, see.”

“Hm,” he said softly, and I could’ve sworn I heard a huff of irritation. Or was it another one of my hopeless delusions? “By yourself?”

I nodded again. “I…I just need to be alone for a while in the fresh air, Isobu-san. I’ll be okay.”

Yet again, my stomach churned as a dark part of my mind said, No, you’re not. You’ll never be okay.

Why now?

That large red-yellow-ringed eye continued to stare at me, almost disbelievingly.

He wasn’t supposed to be looking at me like that. Not at me.

I held back the urge to reach out towards him, instead smiling. “Really, Isobu-san. If Kei asks, I just went out for a walk. I’ll be alright.”

You liar.

Isobu stared at me for a few more moments before he took a step towards me, and I wasn’t expecting the almost gentle nudge against my head, rustling my long hair. “Alright. But if anything happens—”

“I’ll call you or Kei or the other ninja,” I said, feeling a truer smile start to form on my lips. “I know. Thank you, Isobu-san.”

The Three-Tails pulled back to stare at me again, and I could’ve sworn I saw understanding in the red-yellow rings. “Do not stray far.”

I finally decided to put a hand on one of his many horns, still smiling. “I won’t.”

My stomach churned as my chakra curled up in on itself, hiding. You goddamn liar, Tomoko. You goddamn liar.  

Yet again, I wished I could hear Hisako’s voice.

Yet again, I wished someone could save me.

The walk to the top of Hokage Mountain wasn’t as difficult as I thought it would be. Despite my wearing heels. Sure, my heels were short ones, actually hitting a bare inch of height, but a part of me expected that I would be suffering from cramps or foot blisters by the time I could see the entirety of Konohagakure.

The moon was already high in the horizon, shining down on the rocks beneath, and I could already see how there was no railing at the cliff.

My heart beat again.

They’re…they’re going to be okay, right? Right?

Silence greeted my mind yet again.

I walked over to the cliff. Looking down, I could see almost everything. The Hokage Tower, the Academy, the shopping district, and the many stone faces of the past four Hokage, Minato-san included.

This was my home. This is my home.

I’ve done enough, haven’t I?

I raised a foot past the cliff’s edge for a moment before immediately drawing back in a cold sweat.

The air felt cold. Chilly and desolate.

What the—what the fuck am I thinking?! I can’t die… I can’t. Everyone would—

Team Minato’s faces flashed through my mind. They looked happy. They were happy.

…Weren’t they?  

The hem of my blue dress fluttered in the wind as it blew against my back.

But…I did everything I could…didn’t I? Should I go now?

You should, that dark part of me whispered.

But not like this. I just thought of leaving the village…like a vagabond, so I could help others…not…not…

You need to die now, though. It’s all over. They don’t need you.

No, no, nononono, I—

My thoughts were already remembering pools of red.

I don’t want to go like this!

“TOMO!”    

It was as if the darkness had stopped. As if all time had stopped. The stars were shining in the sky again, and the moon seemed almost brighter.

My heart leapt in my chest as the first tear started budding in my eye. I couldn’t even get the chance to whip my head around before a hand firmly grabbed my forearm, and I was getting pulled back. I didn’t even realize we had crashed onto the gravel of the mountain until I was staring at the inside of a suit jacket, and someone was huffing above my head.

“Thank god,” they went harshly before another hand landed on the back of my hair and pulled me closer into the hug.

I knew this presence. I knew this voice. They were supposed to be at the wedding. They weren’t supposed to be here.

“K-Kei?” My voice came out hoarse, raw.

My reincarnation buddy didn’t respond, only gripping my arm tighter as the hand on my head went down to the small of my back, winding around my waist to pull me upright, squeezing. Her breath came out short and almost ragged above my hair, and my heart was still beating hard.

“Kei…” My left, ungrabbed hand, hesitantly reached up to tug at the hem of her jacket. She wasn’t supposed to be here. She was supposed to be with Kakashi and the others, celebrating her own goddamn wedding. She wasn’t supposed to be here… “Kei, why…”

“Isobu told me you went out, and I got a bad feeling,” was the short and terse reply, and she pulled back to stare at me with hard, almost shocked eyes. What? “Tomo, why were you at the fucking cliff? If you walked any further—” she bit her lip as she slowly let go of my right forearm, hand going to cover her face. “Tomoko, you could’ve died.”

It was as if hot coals were shoved down my throat.

I didn’t want to die. I didn’t want to go, but…

When my friends finally found love, where would I be?

“I…” Tears were already starting to bubble up in my eyes as my voice cracked. I tried to smile, but seeing the bride — my reincarnation buddy — like this… She was supposed to be happy. “I just thought…I just thought that my job was done. That I could go, a-and leave you all be so you could be okay without me. I-I wasn’t meaning to jump, if that’s what you were thinking.”

“Tomoko,” Kei’s voice turned hard again, this time with disbelief as she lowered her hand from her face to stare at me. “I saw you lift that foot of yours over the rock. That’s suicide, or suicide ideation if you ask me.”

This time, what felt like cold water splashed over me. “I-I didn’t…I…”

When did my thoughts start leading me to nearly dying like Vy, without even saying goodbye?

I wasn’t expecting Kei’s stare to turn soft in my direction. “Tomoko, what’s wrong? Where’d I screw up? Where’d we go wrong?”

What?

The last straw was everyone else starting to run into the area too, sandals almost beating into the gravel as they approached.

“Tomoko?” Kakashi’s voice. He was here.

“Tomo-chan!” Ricchan, no, Rin — she was here too.

“Kei, did you find her?!” Obi… of course…

“Hime!”

Papa…

Tears were already blurring my vision as a shaky smile came over my face. “I-I…I…”

A calloused hand reached over to touch my cheek, just as the first tear started trickling down. “What is it, Tomo?”

Kei, you absolute dork. It had to be you. You always saved me, didn’t you…

Even now…

The words came out in-between the start of gross-sounding sobs as I covered my face with my hands. My hair was sticking to my face, my heart wasn’t letting up in its marathon, and I just didn’t know whether this was a dream or reality anymore. But they were here, and my friends needed answers. I wanted out of this darkness now. “Kei, I-I think I’m lonely and, and kinda anxious a-and maybe suicidal, from the looks of it, a-and I need help. I don’t know anymore.”

The only response I got was another tight hug as my loved ones started crowding around me. “We can do that, Tomoko.” A hand started going through my hair as people started joining into the group hug. “We can do that. You’re never going to be alone.”

That did it.

For the first time in a long time, I started bawling like a baby.

Even with her wedding suit getting soaked, Kei never let go.

No one else did either.

I clung to them, and they let me.

This was real.

And every time I wailed, the tight, combined grip on me reminded me of that.

[dr-owo]

Sick ain't gonna stop you from accusing, but also, Thanos | Chapter 2 | Raven | Trial | RE: Daishin, Ren, Keiko, Phoenix, ATTN: Bunji

As Daishin and Ren told him to rest up a bit, Raven actually took them up on that offer and kept quiet. It was hard to constantly focus on the trial anyway, so he might as well let the others do some talking. Although he heard his name being mentioned by Abe, the debate went way too fast for him to properly address it.

However, he would eventually get to it, because he didn’t share his alibi first. Granted, probably no one - or at least, most of them - wouldn’t think that a sick man like him was able to commit murder, but hey, it’s always good to confirm whether someone was being truthful about their alibi or not. 

While Raven waited for the right moment to intervene, he simply rested - before he suddenly felt something wet slam into his face. Startled, he almost fell to his side, but was able to keep his balance. The street magician took the strange thing off his face, only to realize that it was a wipe - and a second later, he suddenly had a bottle of water in his hands. He blinked owlishly, not sure how he got either of them, before a voice was directed at him. Looking up, he stared at a certain dark-haired woman with a bemused expression, but then he chuckled lightly, his eyes still dazed.

“H-Heh... You... g-got me there, but... you’re not in a.. m-much better condition, eh...? You... should rest as well...”

Raven placed the wipe on his forehead, feeling relieved to feel something cold there instead of the heat that seemed to be burning away at his body.

“T... Thanks... A-Aya-nee...”

(Who?)

He opened the bottle of water and took a sip - oh man, who invented water? It was one of the most awesome things ever.

While the discussions went on, Raven was able to pick up some details (something about ghosts and also that they only could vote for one culprit? well fuck), but only after Phoenix’ intervention, did he finally take the chance to speak up again. Not like he should, given his state, but when was he ever sensible?

... If anything, he started to drag himself upward, so he could... lean-stand against the podium. Kind of. Heavy breathing aside, Raven concluded that his legs should support him for a minute or two, before they would throw the towel and let him crash back to the ground. Then again, it’s a conclusion from an incredibly feverish guy, so, uh... Yeah. He’s an idiot.

“G-Guess... we really oughta find out who... who killed Kibou, ‘cause... she’s the last one to die and... w-well, given all the... evidence and... info we got, Phoenix is... r-right to be suspicious of you, Okamura. If... anything, I couldn’t... help but notice t-that you... just happened to be in... a-all relevant locations for... for this case. The... grocery store, w-where the pills were taken... t... the fluffy thing that... made me immediately think o-of... your coat... n-not to mention the kitchen, w-where... a knife was missing... And... and now Phoenix’ account on... y-you leaving makes... you suspicious.”

He supressed the cough that came afterwards as best as he could, but he didn’t seem to stop now.

“And... g-given... Sorakuma’s irritation, I... think whoever i-is the... culprit we gotta vote on... is... n-not gonna get punished, ‘cause... they got the right person... I-- hngh-- really wouldn’t be sur... surprised if... you’ve got prospognosia, Okamura. So--”

Raven stopped again, his knees becoming incredibly wobbly.

“Ohhh, I... d-don’t feel so good, Mr. Stark...”

And with that, he half-crashed down to the ground, letting out a groan before he was caught up in another coughing fit.

Yup, this guy’s gonna disintegrate like a certain superhero that has something to do with spiders.

[tanoraqui]

So do you still like the Vorkosigan books? I read them after seeing your posts (I finished all of them in like a week and a half) and I absolutely fell in love! Thank you for getting me my new favorite series I'm inflicting on my family! PS: Am I a heartless bitch for not crying at the end of Cryoburn? My sister cried like a baby but I didn't.

I’m impressed with your stoicness because I cried for like 20 minutes the first time I read it. And I knew it was coming because, like an idiot, I glanced - only glanced, but that was enough - at the last page before I was anywhere near it in the book. I haven’t cried each time I’ve reread it - which has been at least twice - but it sure makes me wibbly. Just, the way it’s done, never said aloud, just, “Count Vorkosigan, sir?” With perfect mirroring, of course, to Miles learning of Piotr’s death at the start of Warrior’s Apprentice. “Lord Vorkosigan, sir?” That’s good writing, that is. And the way Aral’s age is hanging like a specter over the entire book, Mark and Miles both bouncing around it while looking at Kibou-Dani’s technology, or talking about hte Durona Group’s latest breakthrough. The perfect dramatic irony of the final scene. “Count Vorkosigan, sir?” Gregor carrying the bier. Fuck.

I’m so glad I got you into the series! Yeah, they’re pretty much my favorites, too. Very high up there, at least.

[sunset-bridge]

about ur ake shoo takes like i agree a lot with the fact the fandom tends to focus on the extremes rather than the complexities. either making goro a total innocent baby or an irredeemable evil monster, and making ake shoo either pleasant and romantic or just that they hate each other a lot and thats it. when its really much deeper, and that annoys me about a lot of it. (also them misinterpreting.... so much of canon due to bias)

YEAH YEAH ANON !!!! RRRRAAA Mfw the world is cute shades of gray and not black or white hellooooo isnt that kinda cool guys wouldnt it be cool if a game talked about this a bit a cute bit yeah (not directed at u btw just . Yelling at the void)

Like honestly both extreme takes are soo bad so fucking stupid like helloo did we play the same game. Like ofc woobyfing goro and honestly thinking hes an angel or did nothing wrong is bad but also making him seem heartless and completely evil too like helloooo hi hi . Mr. i want to be needed and wanted and loved helloooo hi

Gonna sound delulu again but yes ur so right its like deeper than that hellooo like goro feels so much shit about joker he feels jealous he feels admiration he feels hate he feels respect he wants joker to need him he wants wants his efforts to go noticed but joker threatens his entire core of being with his mere existence how the hell is someone supposed to be normal about this . I couldnt be normal about it personally

Anyways yeah thats it thats what annoys me a lot too about a loooot of ake shooers shu akeers

Anyways cough thank you