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finishtothestart · 8 years ago

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Racism Is Homemade

~Thoughts ~

“Do you know Mrs. Mehra’s daughter married a Gujarati boy?”

“Oh, you are Punjabi, but, you look Madrasi.”

“Such typical Indian mentality!”

“Isn’t Sharma a Punjabi last name? Then how are you Assamese?”

At some given points in our lives, we all have heard people say things like the above mentioned lines.

So, what if she is marrying a Gujarati boy! Does being Gujarati make him less of a boy? Or perhaps it is a way to discuss that she is, after all, marrying someone outside her community. And that, by the way, is a big deal. This example addresses the level of communalism in our country.

What does “you look Madrasi” even mean? If you run a survey in the streets, the popular answers will include, they are dark skinned, they usually have curly, crimped hair and so on. So, will this make a light colored Madrasi an alien and have him banished by his people? This point here showcases the love for stereotyping amongst people.

Define Indian mentality? How can a way of thinking be attributed to the person’s nationality? And if a bunch of people you have met acted in an unfortunately embarrassing way, is it fair to assume the rest of their countrymen act the same way? So, in all fairness, I can tag this as a generalization.

The basis and first step of any relationship or conversation is exchanging your ground identities – your name. But, more often than we realize, in the country we live in, the moment you exchange names each person starts analyzing the other person’s name and wonders which region or state of the country could he or she belong to. First, why is that important? Will it affect the conversation or would it only help you direct your assumptions about the other person? Regionalism is ingrained in our minds since the very beginning.

So, deducing from the above points, it is safe to admit that most Indians are either suffering from communalism, regionalism or stereotyping & generalizing syndromes.

In more than one occasion I have found friends, colleagues or acquaintances discuss how racist and divided the people of other countries can be. But, I wonder how often have the same people paused and looked into the mirror! People argue that asking about a person’s community only helps know more about their origin and background. However, the sad truth is, today, it matters to us only because it helps us guess and stereotype the person into the fixed traits of the community.

“I am Bengali and I don’t like eating fish.” This sentence alone is enough to raise eyebrows of so many people out there who happily assume that every Bengali eats fish for breakfast, lunch and dinner. And, probably fish fingers for midnight snacks too.

Just recently at an interview, I was asked, “Where do you belong?” For about half a minute, I kept wondering if it had any profound connotation or was I supposed to answer professionally where I belonged! I had a rush of thoughts and possibly my face gave it away, and the interviewer asked again, “Which place?” In the middle of the conversation about my academical qualifications and work learnings, wonder why knowing my community was so integral.

This, by the way, is me.

I have literally grown up on the question – Are you Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Indonesian, or from any god damn country from Asia Pacific?

To which, I would generally answer, “Of course not, I am Indian.”

And I would watch their faces turn curious and slip into a wonderland.

Even if they have this question, my curiosity lies in knowing how does this add any value to our conversation. Would we begin discussing the People’s Republic of China, Xi Jinping or plan a trip to my hometown in Beijing? I wonder what would happen next.

More often, in my younger days, I noticed that calling someone Asian was not just a curious remark but rather a derogatory comment. Basically, tagging you un-Indian and ugly. It took a while for me to realize that it was absolutely not-a-problem to call people names basis on their looks, caste, language or community in India.

Kala Madrasi, Chinki, bhaiya, vada-sambhar, aiyyo-amma, Sardar (equivalent to dimwit), babumoshai, roshogulla, gujju, dhokla-khandwi and more. Who isn’t familiar with all this name calling!

Then, we are the same people who turn to the other nationals and complain about them being racists. Well, yes! They are and so are you. Racism and segregation breeds in our homes in India. These topics are a part of our dining table conversations, morning walk chitchats and even our hangouts. We as individuals are mentally trained to learn this and pick up since our childhood. We all begin at home, move on to talk about it with friends and then practice at a larger scale in life.

Don’t complain about racism if you are a racist yourself. It isn’t even about calling people names, have you wondered about these questions silently in your mind? Then it is enough for you to call yourself a racist.

Just last week when I was at a food court in a mall, there was a little guy about 14-15 years of age who seemed to be a special child from the way he walked, spoke and postured. He came up to me, shook my hand and said: “Hi, didi (elder sister)!” I replied to him warmly, to which, he asked, “Are you Chinese? You have straight hair but, how are your eyes so big?” I sat there wondering if I should be sorry about him being born this way or being a racist.

Originally written for talebrewers.com

#racism #indian #chinese #issues #humanity

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