#kevinshawn

[tameodesza]

Stripped

˖⁺‧₊˚✦ Summary: Shawn does a promo nearly naked and it leaves Kevin hot and bothered.

˖⁺‧₊˚✦ a/n: Smut for smut’s sake. Thought of this after making this gif set. AO3 link

Razor Ramon had been crowned the WWF Intercontinental Champion during Shawn’s suspension, but Shawn was willing to do anything to prove that he was the real champion.

It had been his idea to do his promo scantily clad, of course, thinking it was a clever way to emphasize that he’d never been stripped of his title. That and he knew Kevin would be watching.

Kevin was full of indecent thoughts as soon as he saw the blond come out in nothing but a white towel. And hiding his lust had been no easy feat with Shawn gallivanting around the locker room in his loosely tied towel, exposing those tanned thick thighs with no effort.

He’d almost lost his will when Shawn sat spread eagle on the edge of the couch during his interview, his towel not leaving much to be seen. Kevin tried not to fall into the trap, knowing that Shawn was just putting on a show probably hoping to get a rise out of the older man. But it was working, that much being evident by the very hard problem growing between his legs.

As the promo ended, Kevin couldn’t throw the camera crew out of their locker room quick enough.

Shawn was still admiring his beauty in the vanity mirror when he was suddenly turned around and hoisted up into Kevin’s arms. His yelp was cut off by Kevin’s lips abruptly smashing against his own. Shawn returned the kiss with a triumphant smirk, wrapping his arms around Kevin’s neck and his legs around his waist.

Kevin’s tongue ravenously battled Shawn’s as he set the blond down onto the edge of the vanity table, clumsily knocking over Shawn’s expensive collection of shades and earrings. But Shawn didn’t care about the items as he brought Kevin closer with his legs, dry humping the man as they made a mess of themselves – heavy breathing, lip biting, hair pulling, and light moans filling the air.

Shawn’s arrogance slipped away as Kevin dominated him. It was almost funny how in front of the cameras, everyone seemed to think Shawn called the shots. But they both knew who truly ran the relationship behind closed doors.

Kevin pulled away from the kiss with a tug of Shawn’s bottom lip, panting, “You’re such a tease.”

Shawn’s eyes were half-lidded as he innocently answered, “I don’t know what you mean.”

“The only thing you’re stripped of is your clothing, huh?”

Shawn leaned back on his hands, grinning, “Was only stating the obvious.”

“Oh, were you now? But you still have this on.”

He eyed Shawn’s towel which looked like it was hanging on for dear life in Shawn’s disheveled state. Kevin placed his hands on Shawn’s knees, slowly spreading his legs wider to reveal more of his thighs. Shawn’s flexibility allowed him to widen his legs almost to a split, only being stopped by the table pressing against his legs. With the towel now pooled at Shawn’s hips, Kevin was pleased to see the tent poking under it.  

Shawn watched with eager eyes, biting his lip before saying, “I do, don’t I? Maybe we should fix that.”

Kevin rubbed his hands up Shawn’s thighs, stopping at the edge of the towel. He lifted it to reveal Shawn’s hardening cock, saying in awe “You really went commando.”

He knew he shouldn’t have been surprised, but he thought the blond would’ve at least had the decency not to risk flashing his dick on live TV.

“Turns you on, doesn’t it?”

It did, and Shawn knew it.

Instead of answering, Kevin kneeled before the blond, his head disappearing under the towel as he brought his lips to the head of Shawn’s cock. Shawn fully hardened at the sensation, his breath hitching as Kevin’s tongue flicked across the tip. Kevin placed a hand at the base of Shawn’s cock, stroking it halfway up as his mouth traveled halfway down.

“Mm, Kev. Oh, yeah,” Shawn moaned. It wasn’t everyday that Kevin graced him with a blowjob, and it was a shame because that tongue did wonders.

Kevin kept a steady pace for some time, working Shawn up until the blond was desperately grinding his hips up into his mouth. He gave a long hard suck as he pulled off of Shawn’s cock, using the mixture of his saliva and Shawn’s precum as lube as he stroked the entirety of the blond’s cock.

He sat back, coming face-to-face with Shawn’s puckered hole. “Look at you. All nice and clean for me. Confident I’d eat your ass today?”

“I was hoping,” Shawn struggled to say clearly through strained breaths.

But all clarity was gone as he felt Kevin’s wet tongue lap at his entrance before entering the tight ring. He pushed his tongue in and out, fucking Shawn skillfully as he continued to jack him off.

“Mmmh, yeah. Like that, big daddy. Please. Keep doing that, please,” he begged. And boy did Kevin like when he begged.

Kevin’s tongue continued to explore Shawn’s hole as he quickened the pace of his hand on Shawn’s cock. Meanwhile, he brought up his other hand to pinch at one of Shawn’s perked nipples. Shawn’s legs trembled in overstimulation, a low whine being heard in the mess of slick sounds in the room.

Shawn lifted up the towel and ripped it off, revealing Kevin’s dark head of hair between his legs. But when he went to take off the belt, Kevin stopped him. “Leave it.”

And Shawn swore his dick twitched just at the thought of getting fucked wearing the Intercontinental belt.

After Shawn’s obedient nod, Kevin brought his tongue back to Shawn’s clenching ass, causing Shawn to groan in satisfaction. He brought a hand to the back of Kevin’s head, shoving his tongue deeper inside. He thought it couldn’t get any better than that until Kevin suddenly inserted a finger along with his tongue.

Shawn gasped as he threw his head back, accidentally banging it against the vanity mirror. “Ah! Daddy-” Shawn’s words were failing him and he knew he wouldn’t last long like this.

But he wanted more. He needed more.

He tried to put more force behind Kevin’s head to keep him inside, but it was the taller man who reminded him who was in control when he removed his hand from Shawn’s cock to grab onto Shawn’s wrist, holding it down to the table.

Kevin removed his mouth from Shawn’s ass, continuing to finger the blond as he wrapped his mouth around Shawn’s dick, deep throating him to the best of his ability.

“Oh, fuck!”

Kevin nearly choked when Shawn brought his free hand to the back of his head, lowering him further onto his cock. Kevin removed his hand from Shawn’s ass, gripping the blond’s wrist and holding it down. Shawn whined, now defenseless as Kevin pinned both of his hands down to the table.

Kevin slid his mouth off of Shawn before standing, placing his forehead against Shawn’s as he whispered, “That’s not very nice, Shawn. You’re being greedy.”

Shawn seemed to be barely there, his eyes glazed over in a daze. “I’m sorry, big daddy. You just feel so good. Please, let me have you. I need you. Please, daddy.”

Kevin smiled gently at Shawn being right where he wanted him – a mess of himself, begging, forehead shining from sweat, eyes glistening half-lidded. He was puddy in his hands. To top it all off, there sat the WWF belt reflecting off of Shawn like diamonds. He was gorgeous, and Kevin had half the heart to not deny the blond any longer.

He gave Shawn a light peck before letting go of Shawn’s wrists. He brought Shawn’s legs up, bending them at the knee and bringing them towards Shawn’s chest until the blond’s feet rested on the table.

Kevin let out an unsteady breath at the sight. “Shit, you look so sexy. Spread your legs wider. Stay just like that for me,” he instructed, leaving Shawn fully exposed in nothing but his championship belt.

He went to his bag to retrieve the lube he always kept on hand. But with as desperate as Shawn seemed, he guessed there wouldn’t be much prep needed.

Kevin unzipped the front of his pants, not even bothering to take them off as adjusted himself to pull his dick from his briefs through the opening of his jeans. He slathered himself up, darkening his jeans as a bit of the lube got onto them in his haste.

He stroked himself with one hand as he prepped the blond with the other, his lubed fingers stretching Shawn as much as needed.

“Mmph, daddy please. Please hurry before I come,” Shawn warned, his cock oozing precum. He was right on the edge but was trying his best to hold back.

“Patience,” Kevin whispered, continuing to properly stretch the younger man.

After finding Shawn’s sweet spot, the younger man crying out as he threw his arms around Kevin’s shoulders, Kevin removed his finger and replaced them with his cock. He caught Shawn’s lips as the blond gasped at the intrusion, drinking up the moans Shawn let out in his mouth.

There was no holding back for either of them after that. Kevin jutted wildly into Shawn, the vanity mirror knocking against the wall in tune with every thrust. Shawn moaned loudly, uncaring of who could hear through the thin walls of the locker room. If anything, he hoped someone could hear how well his bodyguard was fucking him, wishing they could be as lucky as Shawn.

Shawn watched as Kevin’s dick disappeared and reappeared from his hole, how his stomach muscles contracted with every thrust. And as Shawn saw Kevin’s sweat dripped down onto the gaudy belt around his waist, he thought this was singlehandedly the hottest thing they’d done together – and that’s saying a lot.

Shawn brought them closer with his legs, clinging onto Kevin like a koala to a tree, feeling his dick press between Kevin’s stomach and the WWF belt. Shawn’s eyes rolled back as Kevin’s strokes grew shorter, the man rapidly rolling his hips into the blond.

Shawn wrapped his legs tighter around Kevin, grinding up to meet his thrusts, which sent him over the edge. “Fuck, Kevin! Fuck me! I’m about to-”

He gave a loud yell as he came in spurts, his come landing on the belt and smearing between him and Kevin as the older man continued to pound into him. Kevin soon followed behind, going still as he came hard into the blond.

Kevin dipped his head into Shawn’s neck, both men struggling to catch their breaths. As they both came down, he rubbed a gentle hand along Shawn’s back, signaling that they were done. It was a nonverbal cue he’d learned to do long ago back when Shawn felt like he needed to prove himself to whoever it was that he was screwing. They’d come a long way to get Shawn to understand that sex was a two-way street.

Kevin lifted his head, pressing it onto Shawn’s as he caressed the blond’s cheek. Shawn’s eyes fluttered open, still a bit hazy as Kevin asked, “You good?”

Shawn gave a lazy smile as he nodded. His smile widened when he looked down to see the streak of white contrasting against the gold on his belt. “We made a mess.”

“You made a mess,” Kevin chuckled. “But as always, I’ll be there to clean it up.” He swiped a finger across the belt, gathering a layer of come before licking it off with a smirk. “Now it’s clean.”

Shawn stood corrected – Kevin licking his come off the WWF belt was single handedly one the hottest things he’d seen.

Kevin grabbed Shawn’s towel to clean up the remaining come from the belt before moving to clean Shawn’s entrance. He helped Shawn sit into a more comfortable position as the blond said, “The office is going to kill us if they ever found out about this.”

Kevin wiped himself, coyly answering, “Won’t stop us from doing it again, will it?”

“Nope,” Shawn snickered. “Hey, I was thinking. After this whole run as Intercontinental Champion, we should try for the tag belts.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Wouldn’t it be hot if we both fucked in our belts?”

Kevin snorted at the idea, but he knew Shawn was being serious, especially with the daydreamy look he was giving. And the blond was always one to one-up himself.

Kevin folded the towel to a dry spot, using it to dab at the sweat along Shawn’s hairline. He pulled Shawn into a soft kiss, whispering, “Let’s just focus on you being IC champ first.”

[theclaravoyant]

AYYY KEVINSHAWN I love that guy

[tameodesza]

ˑ˚₊ 𝕔𝕠𝕥𝕥𝕠𝕟 𝕔𝕒𝕟𝕕𝕪 𝕜𝕚𝕤𝕤𝕖𝕤 ₊ ·꙳

🎡 Summary: Kevin tries to win a prize for Shawn at the county fair but it doesn’t go according to plan

🎡 a/n: the fact that I drafted this over a year ago... better late than never I suppose. AO3 link.

Shawn hid behind his cloud of cotton candy, stifling his laughter as Kevin missed yet another basketball shot.

“I’m rusty!” Kevin exclaimed before handing another ticket to the worker.

The date was Kevin’s idea. With him and Shawn being workaholics, he thought they deserved to enjoy the fruits of their labor on a nice fall day. Shawn spent most of his days tending to their farm, and although the blond loved what he did, it could be physically and mentally exhausting at times.

Kevin was an ex-basketball star turned diesel mechanic due to an unforeseen injury. He made a good living, but it wasn’t as lucrative as his basketball salary. He and Shawn worked hard and made many sacrifices to have a roof over their heads, and Kevin wanted to show the blond how much he appreciated him.

That and he also wanted to show off his mad basketball skills. It had been years since he left the court professionally, but the sport was second nature to him. Except it wasn’t panning as he expected on their date.

“God dammit,” Kevin grunted frustratedly as he missed the shot again.

Shawn’s giggles subsided and he rubbed a comforting hand along Kevin’s arm.  “Babe, it’s ok. I don’t need a stuffed animal-”

“I got it! Must be the wind.” He’d be damned if he wasn’t going to win that giant stuffed pink panda for Shawn. It was the last weekend the fair was in town, so Kevin wouldn’t get another chance.

Kevin was determined not just because he wanted to win a prize for Shawn, but also because he’d formed a mini crowd in his quest to make a basket, and he refused to embarrass himself in front of the teens that were making successful shots beside him.

Kevin let out a slow exhale. He dribbled the ball a few times. He bent his knees at an angle, eyeing the distance between the ball and the basket. He had to make it. What man would he be if he didn’t? He didn’t drag Shawn all the way out there to go home empty-handed.

After another breath, he straightened his knees and launched the ball towards the basket. He held his breath in anticipation, the ball seeming to move in slow motion.

Kevin’s eyes widened and gasps could be heard as the ball neared the basket. It hit the rim and circled around and around. But instead of falling inside, the ball’s momentum catapulted it outside of the ring and down the gutter where Kevin’s other failed attempts lay.

Kevin groaned and so did the crowd around them. A few people walked off in boredom and others in disappointment. Shawn should have groaned as well, but his eyes were nearly brought to tears in laughter. He couldn’t understand why Kevin was taking a kids’ game so seriously. Not to mention, the amount of money the man was wasting on tickets for a prize he could buy at a store for much less abysmal.

“Here. Let me try.” Shawn handed his cotton candy over to Kevin. Before the man could protest, Shawn said, “I’m tired and it’s getting cold. I’d rather not freeze my ass off waiting for you to win this thing. We leave after this, ok?”

Kevin wanted to disagree, but Shawn’s tone told him not to argue. So he begrudgingly nodded, forming a tiny pout on his lips as he watched Shawn hand a ticket to the worker.

Shawn wasn’t as hung up as Kevin on if he’d make the shot or not, so he had low expectations. He dribbled the ball once and shot it off without a care. He shocked everyone by making the basket on his first try. It was a lucky shot, really. Shawn was shit at basketball and didn’t know anything about the sport. But he still burst into laughter at Kevin’s disbelief.

Shawn gloated, “That wasn’t so hard. Which toy would you like, honeybun?”

“The game is rigged.”

“Must be if I made the shot and you didn’t, Mr. Basketball star.” Shawn teased with a sing-songy tune. Kevin silently sulked as he watched Shawn grab the pink panda. The blond handed it over with a sickeningly sweet smile. “For my big daddy.”

But Kevin didn’t grab it. He bit into the fluffy cloud in his hands, his pout deepening as he grumbled, “You’re not getting your cotton candy back.” As if itwere the ultimate punishment.

It wasn’t serious though. He and Shawn teased each other all the time, sometimes much harsher than what happened that day. It was an element of their relationship that they both loved – how they could be so silly and unserious with each other. How they could joke with each other and not take things to heart. They knew where each other’s boundaries were and trusted that the other would never cross them.

“Aww,” Shawn cooed. He pecked Kevin’s pout, noting a taste of sugary cotton candy on his lips. “That’s fine. You can have it as a consolation prize,” he snickered. Then he leaned next to Kevin’s ear, whispering, “As long as I get to have you tonight, sweet cheeks.”

Shawn used his free hand to smack Kevin’s ass with full force. Kevin went still, his cheeks heating up in embarrassment, and Shawn snatched the cotton candy from his hands in his short distraction. The blond took off running in laughter, hands as full as his heart.

Kevin stood there for a moment, saving the picture in his head. Shawn’s signature stressed frown was replaced with a bright smile. His boisterous laughter carried across the fair grounds as he ran in delight. All the embarrassment Kevin experienced that day made that moment worth it.

[tameodesza]

Confession (KevinShawn/BretShawn)

AO3 link | masterlist

Shawn is pressured to come clean about his affair with Bret Hart.

a/n: Back with more angst! This follows the events that took place in this fic

“If you don’t tell Kevin, I will.”

The threat came from a very pissed off Hunter after he spotted Shawn leaving the Harts’ locker room, clothes disheveled and a hickey on full display.

The glowing smile Shawn was wearing immediately dropped as he angrily hissed, “No, the hell you won’t! It’s none of your fucking business-”

“It is when I’m friends with the both of you.”

Shawn scoffed, “But you’ve known me longer. I’m your best friend for fucks sake!”

“And he’s my friend, too! You’re putting me in a difficult situation, Shawn.”

“Oh, stop being dramatic,” Shawn said as he continued walking down the hall.

Hunter followed him as he said, “How do you expect me to talk to Kevin and act like everything’s ok when I know his boyfriend’s getting fucked by Bret Hart-”

“Shhh!” Shawn looked around cautiously to be sure no one had heard Hunter. When the coast was clear, Shawn said to Hunter, “You don’t think I feel guilty about it? I feel like shit.”

“Then why are you still fucking around?” Shawn didn’t have a good answer and he didn’t feel like thinking of one.

“Just drop it. You’re giving me a headache.”

“It’s not right, Shawn. And you know it-”

“I know! Ok? I know. Just…give me time. I’ll tell him.”

“Soon.”

“Ok, yes. Soon.”

Hunter wasn’t sure if he trusted Shawn, but he decided to drop it for now, hoping he could take Shawn at his word.

   The next time Shawn saw Kevin was two weeks later. With Shawn traveling in between towns and Kevin having a day off, Kevin suggested that the two of them book a hotel room to spend some quality time together.

Normally, Shawn would be excited. He hadn’t seen Kevin in over a month, and he missed him so much. But he still hadn’t told Kevin about Bret. Shawn felt that the conversation was one that needed to be had in-person rather than over the phone.

Shawn planned on telling Kevin as soon as he saw the man. But it was so hard to even think of uttering those words when Shawn opened the hotel room door to see his boyfriend’s beaming smile.

Kevin pulled Shawn into the room, immediately engulfing the man into a tight long-lasting hug, glad to have Shawn in his arms again. “Hey, baby. I missed you so much,” he whispered.

Shawn tightened his grip onto Kevin whispering back, “I missed you too.”

Kevin pulled back slightly to look at Shawn, bringing up a hand to slowly caress his face as he took in his beauty, before bringing Shawn into a slow and sensual kiss. Shawn kissed back just as eagerly, briefly forgetting why he was so nervous in the first place.

After separating, Kevin rested his head onto Shawn’s as he continued to stroke the blond’s cheek. His lips ghosted over Shawn’s as he said, “I’m so happy you’re here.”

Shawn smiled, “Me too.” Then his smile faltered as he remembered why he was really there.

He had to tell Kevin the truth.

But it was hard to, especially with how sweet Kevin was being.

The taller man had gone out of his way to make Shawn feel special. He ordered room service, lit candles, brought out an expensive bottle of wine, and gifted Shawn a few knickknacks he picked up on the road that he knew the blond would like.

Shawn’s heart melted that whole evening as he further drowned in guilt. He was guilty that Kevin was being so thoughtful while he harbored such a horrible secret. And despite his guilt, he unashamedly basked in the attention Kevin was giving him – the attention that Shawn had been craving for the past few months.

His guilt only worsened when, after pouring another glass of wine, Kevin said earnestly, “I’m sorry I haven’t been putting in much effort lately.”

Shawn shook his head. “Kevin, it’s fine. You don’t need to apologize,” and make him feel even worse about himself.

But Kevin insisted, “I know you try your best to be understanding, but we all reach a breaking point. I just wanted to show you how much you mean to me, Shawn. I love you, and I promise I’ll do better.”

Shawn got teary-eyed, but for reasons that Kevin wasn’t aware of. The taller man chuckled as he brought Shawn into a hug saying, “You’ve always been an emotional guy.”

Which was true. But Shawn was emotional for multiple reasons that night. He was touched by how caring and thoughtful Kevin was being. But the reality of the situation was also hitting him.

Like the good boyfriend he was, Kevin could sense that something was bothering Shawn, especially after noticing Shawn’s shoulders trembling slightly. He stroked Shawn’s back gently as he asked, “Hey, what’s wrong?”

Shawn pulled back from the hug, wiping his eyes before looking up at Kevin’s concerned face. The secret was on the tip of his tongue. But instead of the truth coming out, Shawn said, “I love you. So much.”

That brought a smile to Kevin, the taller man cupping Shawn’s face with both of his hands, thumbing away the tears on Shawn’s cheeks. “I love you, too. In case I haven’t said it enough tonight.” He then pulled Shawn into a passionate kiss that soon turned heated.

That was all it took for the couple to forget about dinner and make their way towards the bed.

Shawn didn’t know just how much he missed being caressed and wrapped around Kevin until the man was thrusting into him with such care and ease.

It wasn’t the quick fuck he and Bret usually had. No. It was passionate, sensual, and brought Shawn so much pleasure – so much that he climaxed twice before Kevin could even finish. That night, Kevin gave Shawn everything he needed, but was too impatient to wait for.

And because Shawn was a selfish man, he decided the truth could wait. He’d tell Kevin eventually, but not tonight. For one more night, he wanted to experience Kevin’s love before it would be taken away from him.

   Shawn was the first to wake the next morning, his head resting on Kevin’s chest as his guilty conscience weighed heavy. He didn’t know Kevin was up until he felt the man’s hand slowly tread through his hair.

Shawn closed his eyes, sighing heavily as he worried about how he was going to tell Kevin the truth. He didn’t want to break the man’s heart. He didn’t deserve it, but Shawn couldn’t keep prolonging it.

However, right as Shawn was about to open his mouth, he was thrown off by Kevin saying, “I was thinking about going back to the WWF.”

Shawn’s eyes flew open as he tilted up his head to look at Kevin in shock. “What?”

Kevin smiled as booped Shawn’s nose saying, “You heard me.”

However, Shawn didn’t return the smile, genuinely confused. “But… why? Things are going so well for you at WCW.”

Kevin let out a breath. “I know, I know. But it’s not the same being there without you, Shawn.”

“But…you’d be taking a major pay cut, right?”

“I don’t care. You mean that much to me.”

And Shawn wanted to cry again.

The fact that Kevin was so serious about him, serious enough to leave millions of dollars behind to be with him, was too much. He couldn’t let him make such a drastic decision without knowing the truth.

Shawn frowned to himself before fully sitting up and saying, “I can’t do this.”

Kevin frowned as well, not liking the sound of that. He sat up, asking, “Is there something wrong?”

Shawn groaned as he rubbed incessantly at his face. He then looked into Kevin’s eyes, voice quivering as he said, “I have to tell you something.”

Kevin hated seeing Shawn upset, and obviously whatever he was about to say was bothering him. So he grabbed Shawn’s hand in support, saying softly, “Take your time.”

Shawn grimaced as he said, “Please, don’t do that.”

“Do what?”

“Be sweet to me right now. I don’t deserve it.”

Kevin tilted his head in question. “Why wouldn’t you deserve it, Shawn?”

“Because after you hear what I’m about to say, you’re going to want nothing to do with me.”

Kevin tightened his grip on Shawn’s hand, saying, “Never. There’s nothing you could say that’ll make me love you any less.”

Shawn slowly pulled his hand away from Kevin’s, taking a deep breath before saying, “I cheated.”

It was as if time stood still, the room quieting as the words settled in the air. Kevin looked like the color drained from his face, mouth hanging open in shock at the revelation. There’s no way. He must have heard wrong.

Seeing Kevin go quiet, Shawn quickly spewed, “I’m a terrible person, and I feel so horrible about it! I’m sorry. I’m so so fucking sorry, Kev. Kevin.” Shawn tried to get the man’s attention who was looking spaced out.

Shawn tried to place his hand back into Kevin’s, but the man snatched away, asking, “Who was it?”

Shawn stalled, causing Kevin to shout, “Who the fuck was it, Shawn?!” Shawn jumped, slightly startled at the outburst.

The truth of the matter was that Shawn didn’t want Kevin to know, honestly afraid of what the older man would do.

Fed up with Shawn’s silence, Kevin hissed, “If you don’t tell me right now, I’m leaving-”

“Bret! It, it was Bret.”

Kevin was taken aback, not believing what he was hearing. Last time he checked, Shawn and Bret didn’t get along, or at least that’s what it seemed like before he left for WCW. “How long?”

Shawn swallowed hard, his hesitation causing Kevin to reiterate, “How long has this been going on behind my back, Shawn?!”

Shawn’s heart pounded as he said shakily, “Uh, a-a few months. I’m sorry- Babe!”

Kevin swiftly stood up from the bed, no longer wanting to hear what Shawn had to say. He was beyond livid, and he knew being anywhere near Shawn was a bad idea.

Unfortunately for him, Shawn trailed behind him, desperately grabbing at Kevin’s arm as he said frantically, “Would you please just listen to me-”

Kevin snatched his arm away, exclaiming, “Get the fuck away from me, Shawn! Don’t fucking touch me.”

Shawn’s eyes instantly pooled with unshed tears, the younger man not used to being on the receiving end of an irate Kevin.

Throughout their relationship, Kevin was always so careful with him, so patient and understanding. They rarely fought, and even during the small times that they did, Kevin always tried his best not to raise his voice, especially because he knew how fragile Shawn was, and screaming at the blond only tended to make matters worse.

However, now Kevin had every reason to be pissed, and Shawn knew it. But it didn’t make being on the receiving end of Kevin’s tirade hurt any less.

Shawn sniffed, saying weakly, “Kevin-”

“Tell me. What was the meaning of this,” Kevin asked as he gestured between Shawn and himself. “of us falling in love, of me devoting my life to you, of us planning our lives together, of us meeting each other’s family? What’s the meaning of it if all you were going to do is shit on everything we’ve been building together?! Does it mean anything to you-”

“Yes! Of course it does, Kev. You mean so much to me. I love you!”

Kevin tsked, shaking his head in disbelief. “Love. This is how you show me you love me? By running to the next man when I’m not giving you enough attention-”

“No-”

“Because you want to know how I show my love? By being fucking faithful to you!”

“I know-”

“You don’t think I get lonely on the road without you?! You don’t think I get frustrated when we don’t have time for each other?! You don’t think I’ve had opportunities to fuck around with people, too?! I have, Shawn. But I never did it because I love you! But I guess I loved you more than you loved me-”

“No, Kevin, that’s not true! I love you – only you.”

“Then why’d you do it?! If you love me so fucking much, why would you throw us away like this?”

“I-,” Shawn cut himself off. He was at a loss for words. No explanation could justify why he did what he did. “I-I don’t know.”

“You don’t know.”

Shawn shrugged, “I-,” he sighed. “I just missed you so much. We barely talked, and the few times we did, we would get into these petty arguments. Then we would make plans to see each other, but they’d get canceled. And you were always so busy-”

“So it’s my fault-”

“No! No, it’s not, Kev. That’s not what I’m saying. I just, I don’t know what to say. I was stupid. I shouldn’t have done it. I’m sorry.”

Kevin went quiet, dragging his hands over his face as he contemplated what to say next. He was so stressed out. This was his worst nightmare, and he never thought Shawn would be the one to put him through it.

He was so angry, both at Shawn and himself. Maybe he didn’t try hard enough. Maybe he didn’t put Shawn first at times. Maybe he did prioritize his work obligations over spending time with Shawn. He knew he was a sucky boyfriend for that.

But did that mean he deserved to get cheated on?

“Kev?”

Kevin was brought out of his thoughts, looking up to see Shawn slowly approaching him like a scared animal. However, Shawn halted at Kevin’s next question. “How many times?”

He needed to know. As heartbreaking as it was to imagine Shawn sharing his body with someone else, Kevin needed to know how bad it was. Was it only one time? Although that was still bad in his eyes, a part of Kevin felt like he could forgive Shawn and move on.

“Um,” said Shawn as he averted his eyes.

The guilt was eating him alive. He hadn’t anticipated for Kevin to ask such detailed questions. Part of him hoped Kevin would give him a pass and they could forget it ever happened. But he should’ve known better.

“Shawn,” Kevin said flatly, this time having no energy to raise his voice. “How many?”

Shawn looked up again and his heart nearly broke at seeing Kevin’s misty eyes.

This was what he was afraid of. He never wanted to hurt Kevin. Never. Yes, Shawn was selfish. Yes, he enjoyed being with Bret. But breaking Kevin’s heart was never his goal.

“I-I don’t know.” Which was the truth. He wasn’t proud to admit that between the various sneaky meetups in locker rooms and hotels, he and Bret had fucked more times than he could count.

“Give me a number.”

Shawn furrowed his brows, saying, “I don’t know, Kev. Multiple times. I can’t give a number.”

Multiple times. They had sex multiple times. Not one. Not two. Multiple. That was all Kevin needed to hear for his world to come crashing down.

Kevin closed his eyes as he felt his throat closing up. He ran a hand through his hair, sighing as a nauseous pit settled in his stomach. He didn’t know how much more of this he could take.

“If you want to be with him, then go.”

Shawn’s heart dropped. He did like Bret, but he didn’t want to be with the man. Shawn knew he was such an asshole for cheating, and Kevin deserved as much space as he needed. But he didn’t want them to end the relationship.

“What, no! Kevin, I don’t-”

“We’re done.”

The tears that Shawn was holding back were unleashed, streaming endlessly down his cheeks as he reached for Kevin’s hand. “Baby, please-”

“Shawn, leave.”

“No,” Shawn sobbed as he threw himself at the man, tightly wrapping his arms around Kevin as he cried into the man’s chest. “Please don’t do this! I’m sorry! I want to be with you!”

It took everything in Kevin not to reciprocate the hug. He’d always been weak for Shawn’s tears, but this was a moment where Shawn didn’t deserve his sympathy. “Shawn, let me go.”

When the younger man didn’t listen, Kevin tightly gripped Shawn’s arms, forcing them away from his body. “Go!”

Seeing that Kevin wasn’t going to change his mind, Shawn dropped his arms before slowly walking to his gym bag. He threw on some clothes, glancing at Kevin every so often, before putting on his shoes, grabbing his bag, and making his way towards the door.

He gave one last glance at Kevin before leaving the room and the broken man inside of it.

Once Shawn was gone, Kevin didn’t hold back any longer, his emotions coming at full force as silent tears streamed down his cheeks. He desperately wanted to punch someone – preferably Bret Hart – but with no one in sight, Kevin let out a yell as he picked up a lamp and threw it into a wall, the lamp shattering on impact.

Breathing heavily, he sat on the edge of the bed, gripping his hair in his hands as he cried, feeling just as broken as the lamp on the floor.

[tameodesza]

Infidelity (KevinShawn/BretShawn)

AO3 link | masterlist

Shawn begins a tumultuous affair with Bret after Kevin leaves for WCW.

a/n: Shawn and Bret are no angels in this au, but I live for the angst 😭 !

Kevin leaving the WWF in 1996 was not on Shawn’s bingo card.

The two had just reunited as a tag team and successfully reclaimed the tag team championship belts. Also, the couple’s relationship was the strongest it’d ever been. So Shawn was completely blindsided by Kevin’s announcement after they’d settled into their hotel room.

“You’re leaving?” Shawn asked the question in complete disbelief. “Please tell me you’re joking, Kev.”

Kevin sighed, “No, Shawn. I’m not.”

Shawn felt like his heart was going to leap out of his chest. “When?” 

“In a few months.”  

Shawn let out a shaky breath he didn’t know he was holding in as he sank to the floor, not even caring about how dirty the hotel carpet must have been. He covered his mouth with trembling hands as reality sank in.  

“Shawn,” Kevin swiftly knelt next to Shawn, bringing the blond into a hug as he placed a hand on the back of Shawn’s head to bury him into his chest. “It’s going to be ok.” 

“Why now,” Shawn asked weakly. “Why are you doing this to us now?” Kevin nearly crumbled when Shawn pulled away to look up at him with tear-filled eyes. 

“WCW made me an offer I couldn’t refuse.” The expression on Shawn’s face told Kevin that was the wrong answer. He added, “I’m sorry, baby. I know I should’ve told you sooner.” 

“No shit,” Shawn sniffed as he wiped a tear from his cheek, which was immediately replaced by another. “What are we going to do? What does this mean for us?”  

Kevin brought his hands to both sides of Shawn’s face, using his thumbs to clear the streams pouring from Shawn’s eyes. “It means we’re just going to have to try harder. I’m not leaving you, Shawn. That’s not even an option. I love you so much. We’ll make it work, alright?”  

Not receiving a response, Kevin leaned forward and placed a kiss onto Shawn’s quivering lips. Shawn placed his head back into Kevin’s chest, just wanting to be wrapped in the man’s warmth. 

 As Shawn feared, things got harder for their relationship once Kevin officially left the WWF. 

The distance was easier to deal with in the beginning. Both Shawn and Kevin made efforts to see each other. They kept up with each other’s schedules, visited each other when their schedules overlapped, and called each other when time allowed.  

Shawn wasn’t sure when it happened, but eventually, the effort that they put into the relationship slowly began to wane, their distance only seeming to cause more friction between them. Their calls became shorter and less frequent, hotel visits were few and far between, and at some point, they stopped keeping tabs on each other’s schedules.  

There were many nights where Hunter held Shawn as the man cried to him about Kevin, venting his frustrations over what inevitably seemed to be the downfall of their relationship. These nights were usually prefaced with Shawn getting drunk or high on any drugs he could get his hands on, much to the disapproval of Hunter.  

Regardless of Hunter’s dislike for Shawn’s coping mechanisms, he was always there to take care of him.  

“Come on, buddy,” said Hunter as he struggled to walk a drunk, stumbling Shawn down the hall to his hotel room.  

Shawn was supposed to stop by Hunter’s hotel room that day, but when the evening turned darker and Shawn still hadn’t shown up, Hunter decided to search for him where he thought he’d most likely find him – the hotel bar.  

“We’re almost there. A few more steps, Shawn. There you go. Please tell me you have your room key.”  

Shawn groaned, barely responding as he pointed to his back pocket. Hunter reached into Shawn’s pants, swiftly pulling out the key from his pocket.  

“At least wait until we get into the room first if you want to touch my ass, Hunter,” Shawn slurred in amusement.  

“Shut up.” Hunter was amazed that Shawn could still be inappropriate in a time like this. 

After opening the door, Hunter walked them both into the room, plopping Shawn onto the bed before helping to pull off his boots. He then helped Shawn sit up into a comfortable position before tucking the man under the covers and announcing that he’d check in on him in a few hours.  

Hunter barely made it to the door before he heard sniffling coming from behind him. He turned to see Shawn staring down at his hands with tears welling in his eyes. “Shawn?”  

“Why did he leave me? Was I not good enough to make him stay?”  

Hunter sighed, knowing where this was going. “Don’t be ridiculous. You know Kevin loves you-”

“But he’s not here. He left me.”

“Doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you-”

“He left me like everyone does. Why do people always leave me, Hunt?” That was all it took to unleash a river of tears from Shawn’s eyes.

Hunter decided to stay with Shawn that night, as he’d done many times before, knowing that it was never safe to leave Shawn alone with those thoughts swirling around in his head. He just really hoped his friends could figure their shit out sooner than later.  

 Shawn didn’t want to admit it, but without Kevin around to give him constant love and attention, he soon became vulnerable to his insecurities, his vulnerability often leading him to seek attention elsewhere. And with Kevin no longer in the WWF, many of the men backstage were more than willing to give him the attention he desired.  

What came as a surprise to Shawn was that one of those men happened to be Bret hart. 

It started as Bret giving him compliments after his matches.  

“Hey, Michaels,” Bret voiced as they passed each other backstage, “Good match tonight.” 

“Th-thanks,” Shawn said dumbfoundedly at the unexpected compliment.  

As much as Shawn relished in the attention, he ignored Bret’s advances at first out of his love for Kevin. They were still technically together regardless of how little they communicated lately. 

It certainly didn’t help that Bret, no longer restrained by Kevin’s presence, soon began to hit on him unashamedly. And maybe Shawn was mistaken, but he could’ve sworn he’d caught Bret looking at his ass once.  

Things began to change when Bret gathered the courage to become more handsy with Shawn. It started with random hugs backstage that seemed to last longer than they should have. Then Bret began placing his hand on Shawn’s lower back as they walked down the hallway together. And sometimes, Bret would play with Shawn’s hands as they carried on a conversation.

Shawn would only blush, not having any intention of telling Bret to stop.

Bret’s attention and blatant flirting led to there being constant tension in the air between them. Whether it was in the ring or backstage, there was no denying that the two felt something for each other.

Shawn really tried not to fall for Bret. But as he and Kevin grew further apart, Shawn felt a little less guilty about entertaining Bret’s advances. It felt good to finally have someone give him their undivided attention again. Not to mention, Bret was easy on the eyes. And Shawn always had a thing for brunettes.

Shawn hadn’t told Hunter about his ‘situation’ with Bret, but Hunter noticed. Everyone did. It was hard not to with the heavy flirting and shy smiles the two threw at each other regardless of who was around.

Shawn was putting Hunter in a tough spot. He was loyal to both Shawn and Kevin. He was the shoulder that Shawn cried on most nights, so he understood more than anyone how lonely and frustrated Shawn felt. But Hunter also knew it wasn’t fair to Kevin. They both knew it.

But Shawn was a selfish man.

He constantly convinced himself that he wasn’t doing anything wrong. He and Bret were just two good friends getting to know each other. There was nothing for Kevin to worry about. Nothing at all.

However, that changed one night after a house show.

After a particularly bad argument with Kevin over the phone, Shawn made his way down to Bret’s hotel room. The older man had offered for Shawn to swing by after the house show earlier that day, but Shawn declined, intending on spending the night talking to Kevin. However, the conversation soon turned heated when Kevin, yet again, canceled their plans to meet up due to a scheduling conflict.

Not wanting to waste his night moping, Shawn decided to take Bret up on his offer.

Shawn told himself that he was only going to Bret’s room to hang out. Only to blow off some steam. Instead, he ended up blowing something else.

  Shawn’s body was pressed tightly between Bret and the hotel room door behind him.

Bret leaned his head onto Shawn’s as he whispered, “You have no fucking idea how much I want to kiss you right now.”

Shawn gave a smirk, heart pounding as he tightened his arms around Bret’s shoulders, lust in his eyes as he said confidently, “Then do it.”

Bret pulled the younger man into a fiery, heated kiss that instantly made Shawn weak at the knees. It didn’t take long before Bret was leading Shawn to the bed and clothes were thrown on the floor, neither man caring about the consequences of their actions.

Shawn felt extremely guilty after the first time it happened.

He and Kevin had been together for three years. They had history, had the same friends, and met each other’s families. For Shawn to throw that away over one night with Bret was really stupid. He knew it. It also didn’t help his guilty conscience knowing that Bret had a wife back at home.

So Shawn planned on putting an end to it, marching indignantly down the hall to Bret’s hotel room the next night. But when Bret opened the door in nothing but a towel, hair dripping from a fresh shower, Shawn was only reminded of their previous night, how Bret made him writhe in pleasure as he pounded into him mercilessly.

Selfishly, Shawn wanted to experience that again at least once more.

So he did. That night. The night after that. And many nights after that, beginning their nearly 3-month affair.

[tameodesza]

Dead Ends (BretShawn) ch.12

<<ch.11 | masterlist | AO3 link

Summary: Some urges just cannot be tamed

NSFW

There had been a noticeable shift in their dynamic since Shawn opened up about his past.

Bret had grown more patient with Shawn, learning how to avoid explosive tirades and to not take Shawn’s sharp comments to heart. It didn’t make them sting any less of course, but Bret thought twice about responding back with any fiery remarks of his own. He felt like was finally beginning to understand the fire behind Shawn’s eyes, realizing that anger seemed to be a safety net for the blond, an easy emotion that allowed him to let go of whatever pent up frustrations he’d yet to come to terms with.

This realization led to him being gentler with the man – letting Shawn sleep longer, opening Shawn’s snacks before the blond could do it himself, or even the few times he purposely lost in a game of tic-tac-toe for Shawn to gloat about how good he was.

They were simple things, but things that made Shawn’s life a little easier.

Bret tried to make his efforts subtle, but Shawn picked up on his kind gestures. And though he didn’t want Bret’s pity, he appreciated how thoughtful the man had been towards him.

After opening up, Shawn felt like a huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders, a burden he’d been carrying around for so long no longer weighing him down now that he had someone to talk to about it. Bret was a good listening ear, and slowly but surely, Shawn grew to appreciate Bret more than he had since they teamed up together.

His appreciation drove him to try to ease up a bit on the older man, sometimes forcing himself to take a breath and think before letting the nearest insult fly out of his mouth. It was still a struggle, but at least he was trying. He’d even become more accepting of Bret’s attempts at small talk, so that was something.

But there was just one problem that spawned from Shawn’s past coming to light. He’d been having horrific nightmares, ones that were so bad that he was afraid to fall asleep.

The first time it happened, Shawn dreamt of Kevin getting eaten alive by Walkers. Then it morphed into dreaming about Kevin eating him alive. Each dream got increasingly dark, even more sinister than the last.

The only comfort Shawn had was knowing that Bret was there for him to talk to about it. Bret had done so since the first nightmare, insisting that the blond didn’t have to go through anything alone.

It seemed to be another one of those nights when Bret’s ears picked on the sound of Shawn panting behind him. He turned around seeing the blond sweating profusely, eyebrows knitted as his chest rose and fell in quick sessions. Shawn suddenly whimpered before letting out a terrified shout.

Bret left the window in a haste and kneeled next to the blond, tapping him on the shoulder saying frantically, “Shawn, Shawn! Wake up!”

Shawn jumped awake, sitting up with sweat dripping down his face as he gasped for air. His eyes darted around the room as if he were still trapped in his dream.

“Shawn,” Bret stressed, but Shawn was still out of it. Against his better judgment, he placed his hands firmly onto Shawn’s face, getting the blond to focus on him as he exclaimed, “Shawn! Calm down, ok? You’re safe. Whatever happened, it was a dream. You’re ok.”

Shawn looked at Bret, blinking a few times before realizing the terror he’d experienced in his dream wasn’t real.

“Shit, you’re burning up,” Bret said as he pulled off his own shirt, balling it up to wipe away the sweat that had collected on Shawn’s face.

Shawn sat there unmoved, a bit shaken from the nightmare. It felt so real.

“I thought the nightmares were going away,” Bret whispered disappointedly as he dabbed the sweat dripping down Shawn’s neck.

Surprisingly, Shawn let him, not putting up a protest as Bret rid him of the sticky sweat. It was when Shawn slowly became aware of his surroundings that he realized Bret’s state of undress.

“Did you really have to take off your shirt,” Shawn said in a plain raspy voice.

Bret’s hand paused as he looked at Shawn before continuing, “We’re out of clean wipes and your face was drenched. You should probably take yours off as well-”

“I’m good,” Shawn quickly said, backing away from Bret’s hand that was dabbing at his hairline.

“Well, at least roll up your sleeves. I’d rather you not overheat in the night.” As Shawn continued to look at Bret with an unreadable expression, Bret sighed, “What was it about this time?”

Shawn hesitated, shifting his gaze elsewhere as memories of the nightmare flooded back.

“Please, Shawn,” Bret pleaded. “You can tell me. I want to know.”

Shawn let out a tired breath, tucking his knees into his chest as he answered, “You became a Walker…and I had to kill you… just like I did Kevin.”

Bret’s breath caught in his throat, now understanding Shawn’s terror. With a nightmare like that, Bret knew needed to be delicate with his response.

The dream fucked with Shawn more than Bret knew. To have to relive his experience with Kevin, now with Bret, made him question his sanity. It was a pain he never wanted to experience again.

“Shawn,” Bret said gently. “I want to assure you of one thing. As long as we stick together, as long as we’re by each other’s side, that’s never going to happen.”

“You don’t know that” Shawn muttered. Which was true, but Bret remained optimistic.

“But I do,” he said as he placed a light hand on Shawn’s wrist. Shawn’s eyes flitted to Bret’s hands, prompting Bret to say, “Sorry.”

Just as he was about to lift his hand, Shawn surprised him by saying, “It’s ok.”

They looked at each  other, both unsure of what to make of the moment, but Bret continued, “We’ve had some close calls, but we’re still here, right? I’m not bitten, and you’re still in one piece. So please don’t let this nightmare make you think otherwise. We’re in this together.”

Shawn was still doubtful, but Bret’s words were nice to hear in contrast to the negative thoughts in his head.

In an effort to better comfort the man, Bret raised a hand to pull Shawn into a hug, but at the last minute, Shawn shot a hand out onto Bret’s chest to stop him. It didn’t take too long before Shawn realized that he was feeling Bret’s warm skin against his palm and he quickly pulled his hand away.

Before anyone could see his cheeks heating up, he laid back on the floor and pulled the blanket on top mumbling, “Put your shirt back on.”

Bret watched as Shawn turned away from him, curling into himself to try to go back to sleep. He could only hope that the man would have an easier slumber now.

Little did he know, Shawn was about to experience one of the most vivid dreams his mind could conjure up.

Hands roamed Shawn’s body as he laid on the bed squeezed firmly between two men. He was locked in a heated kiss with Kevin in front of him as another man kissed on his neck from behind. He felt hand slither up his neck to his cheek before ripping him away from Kevin’s lips. Shawn’s head was tilted back, the blond catching a glimpse of Bret’s face before the man captured Shawn’s lips in a heated kiss of his own.

As Bret’s tongue roamed Shawn’s mouth, Kevin’s traveled down to Shawn’s left nipple, lapping at the sensitive bud as he used a hand to pump Shawn’s leaking cock. Shawn let out unrestrained moans into Bret’s mouth, body shaking in overstimulation.

Shawn pulled from Bret’s lips as he felt himself being turned by Kevin’s strong hands, Shawn’s whole body now facing Bret. Bret brought his lips back onto Shawn’s as Kevin ran his hard cock along Shawn’s ass. Shawn brought his arms up around Bret’s neck, gripping tightly as Kevin entered into him.

He moaned erratically into Bret’s mouth, Kevin pounding into him while Bret’s hand wrapped around his cock. His vision became hazy as he felt his climax rising.

Bret stood watch at the window bored as he focused on the faint sound of crickets in the distance. Shawn had been asleep for about two hours now and seemed to be doing better, which was a relief. With as much as the blond had been through, he deserved a good night’s rest.

Bret’s thoughts were interrupted by the sound of light whimpering coming from behind him. He groaned internally, assuming Shawn was having another nightmare. But instead of turning around to see Shawn in a panicked state, he saw Shawn laying on his chest breathing normally. But what caught his eye was Shawn’s restless movements under the blankets.

When he heard another whimper escape, Bret decided to wake up the blond to make sure he was ok.

Shawn woke up a bit deliriously, heart pounding after being suddenly ripped out of such a pleasurable dream. He was almost disappointed after realizing it wasn’t real, that he hadn’t been wrapped in his husband’s safe arms once again. But as Bret’s concerned face hovered over his own, Shawn was swiftly reminded that Kevin hadn’t been the only man in his dream.

Shawn sat up, sitting awkwardly as he tried to cover the rise in his pants.

“Another nightmare?” Bret asked not knowing that the blond had experienced quite the opposite.

“Something like that.”

Thinking of Bret in such a way should have felt like a nightmare, but Shawn couldn’t forget the pleasure he’d experienced in his dream, a pleasure he hadn’t felt since being with his husband. But his husband wasn’t there to give him the pleasure he craved, pleasure that couldn’t be satisfied with just a mere handjob.

But Bret was. And things were about to get a lot more complicated.

Shawn cleared his throat, sighing reluctantly before saying, “Bret?”

“Yeah?”

“You said we’re partners, right?”

Bret nodded, “Of course.”

“And that we could help each other out with…natural problems?”

Bret stalled, answering cautiously, “Yes?” He wasn’t sure where Shawn was going with this, but the awkward look on Shawn’s face helped to connect the dots. “Do you need me to help you out…like last time?”

Last time. It was the first time either of them had even acknowledged the handjob Bret had given Shawn weeks prior.

Shawn closed his eyes, feeling slightly embarrassed as he whispered, “Like more than last time.”

Bret tilted his head, “More?”

“Don’t make me have to say it.”

Bret thought on it for a moment, hoping he wasn’t wrong in concluding that Shawn wanted to have sex. “Ok.” That was what needed to be said for the blond to take the lead.

As Shawn stood up, Bret laid his eyes on the erection in the man’s pants before he was pulled from the floor by Shawn. Shawn backed up until his back was pressed firmly against the wall. Bret stood in front of him, the blond guiding Bret’s hands towards his belt.

Time was fickle, and knowing that Walkers could show at any moment, Bret wasted no time unbuckling Shawn’s belt to drop his pants and underwear down to his ankles. Shawn closed his eyes, his head resting against the wall as his cock sprang free. Bret quickly wrapped a hand around it, Shawn’s breath hitching as Bret pumped his cock at a steady pace.

Bret was getting pretty riled up himself as he focused on Shawn’s pleased expressions, his own cock rising in his pants. What he didn’t expect to see was Shawn reach a hand behind himself, the blond inserting his fingers into his ass while Bret continued to pump his cock. Shawn’s mouth opened slightly as his breath quickened, the blond fingering himself in search of the sensitive nerve inside.

Bret couldn’t look away, watching with lustful eyes as Shawn opened himself up. Shawn then opened his eyes, Bret’s hand faltering as Shawn gave him a desperate look.

Bret whispered, “Do you want me to-”

“Yes,” Shawn gasped. Unwilling to wait, Shawn pulled his fingers out of himself before turning around and leaning his hands against the wall, showcasing his ass to Bret.

A part of Bret told him that this wasn’t a good idea, that they should stop and think about what they were doing, that their relationship could be affected by this. But as he took in the sight of Shawn’s body, eyes landing on the tattoo he’d seen back at the lake, it was easy for Bret to shove those thoughts aside.

Bret walked up behind Shawn before rapidly undoing his own belt and dropping his pants to his knees. As he used one of his hands to pump himself, he brought his other hand around Shawn to stroke the blond as well. Shawn let out a shaky breath as he closed his eyes again, imagining it were his husband behind him.

Bret removed his hand from his own cock to spit in it, wishing more than anything that he had the proper lube to prep the younger man. But Shawn didn’t seem too worried about it as he pressed his ass back against Bret’s cock, demanding, “Just stick it in.”

Bret followed suit, aligning himself to Shawn’s ass before carefully inserting himself in the tight hole. Shawn’s ass immediately clenched, nails scraping against the wall as Shawn gritted his teeth in a grunt at the intrusion.

Bret stopped moving at hearing the blond’s discomfort but was encouraged to continue when Shawn backed his ass further along Bret’s shaft. Bret lowered his head onto Shawn’s shoulder before gripping the blond’s hip tightly as he filled him to the hilt. They both let out labored breaths but didn’t allow much time to recuperate.

Bret gave Shawn more forceful tugs on his cock causing the blond’s knees to buckle. At the same time, he slowly pulled out of the man before entering again, Shawn’s ass clenching tightly at the sting. But his discomfort was soon replaced by pleasure once Bret hit that spot within him.

“Ah!”

Bret stiffened at hearing the loud moan that left the blond’s lips, it being a huge turn on that the feisty male was crumbling under his touch. Wanting to hear more of it, Bret let go of Shawn’s cock, both hands now gripping Shawn’s hips as he quickened his pace.

Shawn couldn’t control his moans even if he wanted to, this time not suppressing them as Bret hit his prostate over and over again. He brought a hand from to wall to wrap around himself, pumping his own cock as Bret continued to fuck him from behind. And imagining that Bret was Kevin wasn’t going to make Shawn last much longer.

After one hard thrust onto his sensitive gland, Shawn let out a loud cry as come spilled from his cock. His aftershocks were intense as Bret continued to pound into him, the man pulling out at the last second to come on the floor.

Shawn folded onto himself, leaning against the wall for leverage as he tried to catch his breath. After milking himself dry, Bret pulled up his pants and tucked himself in before heading over to Shawn.

“Come on, I got you,” he coaxed as he helped Shawn stand, the blond leaning his weight onto Bret as the older man pulled up his pants and underwear from his ankles. After making sure Shawn’s clothes were in order, Bret asked, “Are you good?”

“Yeah,” Shawn said flatly as he backed away from Bret, a slight limp in his walk.

Concerned, Bret expressed, “I think you should sit down-”

“I’m fine. It’s my turn for watch anyways,” Shawn muttered before walking to the desk, sitting on the hard surface in a wince.

Bret stood there perplexed as he picked up on the shift in mood. After a silent moment, Bret voiced, “Shawn, I think we should talk about-”

“It was just sex,” Shawn said coldly as he looked out the window.

Bret quieted at the abrasive response. He knew he shouldn’t be surprised by now at Shawn’s sudden mood swings, but they’d been on such a positive wave lately that he thought they were moving in the right direction with each other. Now, he was concerned that his lust for the man potentially set them a few steps back.

As Bret slept that night, Shawn was in a mental battle, struggling to come to terms with that they’d done. Although he’d asked for it, Shawn could help the immediate feeling of shame and guilt. He felt like he betrayed Kevin, breaking his vows by seeking out sex with another man.

For some odd reason, Shawn felt like he could justify the handjob. It was quick and wasn’t as intimate. But sex?

Yes, he had urges. And yes, Bret was an attractive man willing to ‘help him out’ with said urges. But Shawn was disappointed yet again that he failed to have self-control. And now that his head wasn’t clouded with lust, he realized how much of a mistake it was. He thought imagining his husband in the situation would help lessen his guilt, but it only made him feel like a bigger piece of shit as no man could ever replace Kevin.

Shawn looked up at the sky wondering if his husband was looking down on him. If so, he could only hope that he’d forgive him.

[tameodesza]

Dead Ends (BretShawn) ch.11

<<ch.10 | masterlist | AO3 link | ch.12>>

Summary: Bret finally learns about Shawn’s tragic past.

a/n: this is a long one so strap in!

Things had been a bit uneasy between the two ever since that night.

While Bret thought what happened between them deserved at least a conversation, Shawn spent the past week avoiding Bret’s attempts at communicating, carrying on as if that night never happened. He’d convinced himself that it was a one-time thing, something that spawned from a moment of weakness that his body couldn’t control.

Now that he’d gotten it out of his system, Shawn wanted nothing more than to forget about it. And he was determined not to let it happen again. Bret eventually gave up all hopes of clearing the air between them, realizing it was best to play along with Shawn’s ignorance.

It didn’t help that his thoughts would sometimes drift to lewd images of Shawn, something he was suffering from at the moment as he sat against the wall trying to take a nap. Sleep had been failing him and his frustrations were worsened by the sound of Shawn biting his nails from across the room.

Bret hadn’t picked up on the nasty habit before, but Shawn had been doing it ever since their night together. He didn’t know if it was a nervous tick or something else, but it was driving him crazy.

“Can you stop that,” Bret said in irritation, eying the blond who sat lazily on top of the desk. After receiving a confused look from Shawn, Bret said, “Your nails.”

Shawn looked down at his fingers before looking back at Bret, saying with the roll of an eye, “Well, seeing that I can’t get any cigs around here, this is as best as I can get to calm my nerves.”

Bret asked with a disgusted look, “You smoke cigarettes?”

“So you’re judging me now?”

“Cigs are bad for you.”

“And so is nail biting based on your judgment. Anything else you’d like to get off your chest?”

Bret said tiredly, “Look, I don’t want to make this a thing. I’m just trying to get some rest and it’s kind of annoying.”

Shawn looked as if he wanted to argue but thought against it. He said sarcastically, “Ok, your highness. No more nail biting.”

Shawn wrapped his arms around his torso, hugging himself in comfort as he now yearned for a cigarette. Bret attempted to fall asleep again but was still having no luck.

After a few moments, Bret opened his eyes and glanced over at Shawn as he asked, “How long do you think we’ll stay here?”

Shawn shrugged, eyes focused on a bird perched on the windowsill. “Don’t know. As long as long we’re safe, I don’t see a reason to leave.” He turned to Bret asking, “Why?”

“No reason. It’s just…sometimes I can’t help but wonder about the future.”

“That’s where you’re fucking up,” Shawn said plainly. “There’s no planning where you’ll be a year from now, let alone what your next meal will be. You’ll drive yourself crazy thinking about that shit.”

“But don’t you ever think about how things will be once this is all over?”

“If this is ever over. There’s no telling what the future will be. Just thank your lucky stars you’ve survived another day. Tomorrow isn’t promised.”

Bret slowly lowered his gaze, saying gloomily, “Yeah. I guess you’re right.” That was depressing to think about.

Shawn’s eyes lingered on the man a moment before shifting back to the bird on the windowsill. The bird then fluttered its wings and flew off into the distance. Shawn watched it sail off into the night, wishing he could experience the same freedom.

His thoughts were interrupted when Bret suddenly asked, “What do you miss the most about our old lives?”

Shawn locked eyes with him, answering monotonously, “You know how I feel about small talk.”

Which was true, but seeing as Bret was struggling to fall asleep, he thought he’d at least attempt to have a semi-decent conversation with Shawn.

He ignored the blond’s protest, saying, “It’d be music for me. There’s so many classic records I wish I could hear right now. What about you?”

“Nothing.”

“I don’t believe you. There’s got to be something. A movie? A sport? A favorite meal? Ugh, my mom’s spaghetti is something I’d die to have right about now.”

“Nothing,” Shawn sharply reiterated, not appreciating Bret’s persistence.

Bret sighed, “Just one thing and I’ll leave you alone.”

Though Shawn wasn’t talkative, Bret thought the question was a great way to learn something new about the blond, however minuscule it may be. He wouldn’t allow himself to cower away at Shawn’s resistance this time.

Thankfully instead of being met with another fiery response, it looked as if Shawn were actually considering an answer. Shawn let out a breath, combing his fingers through his hair before saying with an absent look in his eyes, “I miss…not being like this.”

Bret perked up in interest asking, “What do you mean?”

“I mean…ever since,” Shawn hesitated.

Bret stood and walked towards Shawn, standing in front of him as he further questioned, “Since?”

Shawn’s eyes traveled upwards until they reached Bret’s encouraging eyes. Shawn looked as if whatever he wanted to say was on the tip of his tongue. But at a split second, he turned away mumbling, “Never mind-”

“No. Stop doing that.”

Shawn gave Bret a bewildered look, taken aback by his tone. “Doing what?”

“Keeping things from me. How many times do I need to remind you that we’re partners, Shawn? You should feel comfortable talking to me by now.”

“I am.”

“You’re not. Not when it comes to talking about your past.”

“Because there’s no reason to talk about it,” he huffed as he slid off the desk and walked across the room to create more space between them.

But Bret followed closely behind, not letting up as he said, “There’s every reason to talk about it when the past is obviously still affecting you. It’s not fair that I’ve told you everything there is to know about me, but you refuse to do the same.”

Bret didn’t mean to push, but he was so close to breaking through to Shawn. They’d been surviving together long enough that Bret thought he at least earned the right to hear a piece of Shawn’s backstory. But his hope died down as Shawn stood there not intending to speak.

Figuring this was probably as far as he’d ever get with the blond, Bret sighed and shook his head in disappointment as he backed away from Shawn.

Just as he turned around, he heard Shawn say lowly, “It’s not easy to talk about.”

Bret turned back, surprised to see the sadness in Shawn’s eyes. He looked smaller, vulnerable even as he looked at Bret conflicted.

“Try,” Bret said gently.

Shawn sighed before sinking down to the floor, crossing his legs as he whispered. “I didn’t used to be this way, you know?”

Bret lowered himself as well, sitting cross-legged in front of Shawn as he waited for him to continue.

“I didn’t used to be so…mean. So bold, so abrasive, so angry. When I think about the life I had before all of this, I miss the happy guy that I used to be.”

Bret listened with bated breath, stunned as Shawn said more about himself in just a few short sentences than the entire time they’d known each other. He dared to ask, “What happened to that happy guy?”

Shawn paused, shaking his head as if trying to rid himself of a bad thought. “More than I’d like to remember. I used to have every reason to be happy. Great friends, great family, and a great,” Shawn faltered, unbelieving he was about to reveal this about himself. “A great husband.”

Bret blinked a few times, his eyebrows raising in surprise at the revelation.

“Don’t look so shocked. Yes, I was married. Before all of this shit took it away.”

Date: January 23, 1996 Time: 4:35 pm Location: Detroit, MI

A soft tune carried through the small home as the young couple stood in their living room swaying in each other’s arms. Shawn tightly held onto his husband, the crisp winter air making him second-guess why he agreed to move to Detroit. But as he looked up into Kevin’s loving eyes, he was reminded of the answer.

“What,” Kevin asked as he caught Shawn’s gaze.

Shawn answered softly, “Nothing. I just like looking at you.”

“Not weird at all,” Kevin teased.

“Shut up,” Shawn snickered as he hid his face into the taller man’s chest, Kevin tightening their hold. Shawn closed his eyes in comfort, lightly whispering, “I love you.”

Kevin’s heart always fluttered at those three simple words. He pecked Shawn’s temple before whispering back, “I love you, too, baby.”

Shawn slightly pulled back to look up at Kevin with a tender smile etched on his face. Kevin leaned down, pressing his head against Shawn’s as he placed a light hand on the blond’s cheek. Shawn blushed, appreciating the intimacy. They’d been married for five years, and Kevin still knew how to make his heart melt.

Just then, the couple’s loving moment was interrupted by the faint sound of screams outside.

Shawn jumped in Kevin’s arms, saying in a panic, “What was that?”

Kevin briskly walked to their radio and turned it off to listen closely. For a few seconds, all was quiet until they heard the sound of gunfire.

“That sounded close,” Shawn worriedly expressed. “What do you think it was?”

Kevin grabbed his shotgun from the corner of the room, saying, “I don’t know, but I’m going to check it out.”

“I’m coming with you-”

“No, I need you to stay in here-”

“Please don’t leave me alone, Kev. I’m scared.”

The tremble of his husband’s voice was enough for Kevin to give in. He sighed, “Ok, but stay close to me.”

They slowly made their way out of the living room, cutting through the kitchen to get to the front door. Shawn stayed hidden behind Kevin, his view blocked as the taller man opened the front door to complete chaos –neighbors being eaten alive, cars speeding off  with half-dead bodies on top, shots being fired in all directions.

It was complete mayhem, all things Kevin didn’t want Shawn to see.

He quickly shut the door, locking it in a haste as he said, “Lock the windows. I’ll check the doors.”

Alarmed, Shawn asked, “What’s happening, Kev? What did you see?”

“Quickly!” Kevin barked out as he headed for the back door to check that it was locked.

Shawn didn’t understand what was going on but did as he was told. He ran to every window in the house ensuring that it was locked before meeting back up with Kevin in the kitchen. “Babe, please tell me what’s happening!”

Before Kevin could answer, a hand broke through the kitchen window, yanking onto the back of Shawn’s shirt in an effort to pull the smaller man out.

“Kevin!”

“Shawn!” Kevin was next to Shawn in a flash, but there was a moment’s hesitation as his eyes set on Shawn’s attacker.

A man, no, a thing with skin that looked like it was falling off the bone, like it’d just crawled out of a grave, its loose jaw nipping ravenously towards Shawn’s neck.

“Kevin, help!”

At the sound of his husband’s anguished scream, Kevin aimed his gun straight for the attacker’s head before letting off a loud shot. The bullet perfectly hit his target, but little did he know the shot would alert more of those things of their location.

As soon as he felt the grip loosen, Shawn scrambled away from the window, tears pooling in his eyes as Kevin checked on him. “Are you ok? Shawn, answer me!”

Shawn nodded before instantly being pulled into Kevin’s chest in relief. Shawn pulled away, panting, “W-what’s going on?! What’s happening?!”

“I don’t know.”

The sound of another window breaking caught the men’s attention. But not just that. Accompanied with it was the sound of inhumane grunts as multiple fleshy hands fought to get through the window’s small opening.

Shawn let out a terrified cry, tears streaming down his cheeks in horror as he laid eyes on the creatures – guts hanging out, faces half fallen off, no humanity behind milky eyes.

He was living in a nightmare.

Kevin was just as terrified, but knew he had to be strong for the both of them as he always had been in their marriage.

“Come on.” He grabbed Shawn’s arm he said to Shawn, Shawn’s arm with a firm hand before leading them towards the basement.

Shawn’s legs felt like jelly, the blond in shock at what he’d just seen. Zombies, or at least that’s what they looked like based on what he’d seen in movies.

There was no way this could be real. He and Kevin had just spent a lovely day together with no signs of danger in sight. How could something like those creatures come into existence in such a short period of time?

Shawn was drawn from his thoughts as he felt a light tap on his cheeks. He looked around seeing they’d made it to the basement. Kevin looked at him in concern as he urgently stressed, “Shawn? Shawn, do you hear me? Baby, you gotta listen to me.”

Shawn’s body shook uncontrollably as he blubbered, “Why is this happening? I’m scared, Kevin. I’m so scared.”

Kevin cupped Shawn’s face so he could only focus on him. “I know you are. I don’t know what the fuck those things are, but we’re not safe here.”

“What do we do,” Shawn asked helplessly.

They were interrupted by the sound of a loud thud followed by heavy footsteps walking above them. “Shit, they’re inside,” said Kevin. Shawn broke down more than he’d already been. “Shh,” Kevin said lightly, trying his best to soothe Shawn as he wiped away his tears.  

Kevin’s eyes frantically darted around the basement desperate for an answer. His eyes landed on a small window in the upper corner of the room. He looked back at Shawn, knowing this would be the only way to save the love of his life. “The window.”

“Huh,” Shawn said as he wiped at his eyes, attempting to remain as calm as his husband.

“The window, Shawn. It’s your only chance of making it out of here. You need to climb out and make a run for it.”

Shawn looked at the window, momentarily relieved that his husband had a plan. That’s until he analyzed the size of the window, knowing Kevin wouldn’t be able to fit with his broader stature. Then he reflected on Kevin’s usage of the word ‘you.’

Kevin wasn’t planning on making it out with him.

“No.”

“Shawn, we don’t have time-”

“No! What about you?!”

The older man searched the basement for his spare gun as he answered, “That’s for me to worry about.”

At that moment, there was a loud banging on the basement’s door followed by feral snarls and grunts. Kevin returned to Shawn, handing him the pistol he’d found. “Here, take this for your protection. Use it the way I taught you if you need it, ok?”

A fresh stream of tears ran down Shawn’s cheek as Kevin dressed him in a jacket, roughly straightening the collar to prepare Shawn for his venture.

“Kevin, no,” Shawn squeezed out in a sob. “I’m not leaving you here! You’ve got to be out of the fucking mind if-”

He’s cut off by the sound of the basement door cracking off of the hinges. That upped the pressure of the situation causing Kevin to yell, “Dammit, Shawn! Don’t make this harder than it has to be! Just listen to me!”

Shawn only sobbed harder, quietly squeezing out, “What am I supposed to do without you? Where would I even go?”

“Go to our spot. If it’s safe, stay there and I’ll find you, ok?”

Of course, their spot. During the first year of their marriage, the couple found an abandoned treehouse deep into the woods behind their home. It was a place of sentimental value as they’d spent many nights there stargazing, cuddling, and talking about life.

Who knew their place of love would turn to their last resort for survival?

Shawn was inconsolable, the reality of the situation setting in. He said weakly, “But, Kev-”

But his concerns were cut short as his husband planted a hard passionate kiss on his lips. Shawn responded back just as fiercely, not knowing if it would be the last time he’d see him.

“I love you,” Kevin expressed with a tremble of his voice, his tough resolve beginning to crumble.

“I love you, too.”

“I will find you. I promise.”

There was another crack at the door, it nearly falling off the hinges as more undead bodies clambered on top of each other in a desperate attempt to get beyond the door.

After checking that Shawn had the pistol securely tucked away, Kevin ushered Shawn towards the window, sliding it open before hastily hoisting the smaller man up to get out. It was a tight squeeze, Shawn barely making it through as his jacket got stuck, but he was able to succeed with a forceful push from Kevin.

Once outside, Shawn quickly turned back to the window, tears blurring his sight as he heard Kevin’s last words. “Run, Shawn. Keep running and don’t look back.”

At that, the window was shut in the blond’s face, Shawn screaming Kevin’s name in agony as he banged on the window. There had to be a way to help him. This couldn’t be it.

But Shawn didn’t get a chance to think of a plan as he heard the sound of those creatures rounding the corner of the house. After one final glance at the home he’d spent so many wonderful years in, he did what his husband asked of him and took off running towards the woods.

Shawn spent three days, three lonely miserable days, waiting for Kevin to arrive. Those three days were hell, mainly due to the lack of food and the freezing night temperatures of Detroit. The only comfort he had was a discarded blanket they’d left behind that smelled faintly of Kevin.

Shawn intended on staying in the treehouse longer, but his body lost the fight to hunger.

The blond sat in the corner of the treehouse, legs tucked into his chest with a blanket strewn over his shoulders as he shivered uncontrollably. His stomach painfully ached as it let out another growl. He contemplated if he should make the trek to a nearby gas station in hopes of finding food. He knew it would be dangerous. But it was either find food or starve to death.

But what if Kevin arrived while he was gone? He didn’t want to worry the man by not being in the place he’d promised to be.

Shawn curled into himself as he groaned, wishing Kevin were there to tell him what to do. He’d always relied on the man’s guidance, trusting him to make good decisions. But now that Shawn was forced to make decisions on his own, he didn’t trust that he’d make the right one.

But humans were the weakest when they were the most vulnerable. And Shawn was losing his will to hold on.

Bret watched as Shawn placed his head in his hands, breathing deeply as he tried to collect himself. The air between them was still, Bret afraid to breathe too loudly to break the silence. He was beyond shocked to learn what Shawn had gone through, his story far more disturbing than his own.

And worse yet, Shawn wasn’t finished.

After gathering himself, Shawn lifted his head saying, “I remained hopeful the first few days. Maybe Kevin was on his way. Maybe he’d escaped using another route. Maybe he was bringing help. But all hope died the day I left that treehouse.”

Shawn slowly climbed down the treehouse’s ladder with much difficulty, stumbling down with his achy joints and stiff muscles. He was so weak, barely able to stand as his body tried to give out on him. He was so exhausted, but he knew he had to keep moving.

He walked in the direction of a gas station that he knew wasn’t too far – just a ten minute walk. He could do that.

But it was in that ten minute journey that Shawn saw the aftermath of what had taken place a few nights before. The streets were littered with abandoned cars, blood and guts were strewn across lawns, and bodies on the ground. Some were human and others were… whatever the hell those things were.

It was pure destruction, but Shawn trudged along, making it to the gas station unscathed. The store was a wreck - broken windows, flickering lights, debris everywhere – but fortunately for Shawn, it still seemed to be stocked with a few snacks.

Shawn tore into the first thing he found, a bag of chips, wolfing down the salty treat before chugging a bottle of water. He then devoured a pack of cookies before deciding to shove as many snacks into his pocket that he could fit to save for later.

As he was in the midst of shoving a pack of gummy worms into his jacket, he froze upon hearing a mangled gurgling sound. He stayed still, holding his breath to hear closely before he heard the sound again.

Shawn slowly turned around as he clutched at the gun Kevin had given him. He stooped low, cautiously stepping over fallen debris as he inched down the aisle he’d been on. He held the gun tightly to his chest, breathing deeply with closed eyes as he coached himself to be brave like Kevin would want him to be.

He peered his head around the corner in the direction of the noise and just as he feared, there was an undead being trapped between a wall and a fallen shelf. But Shawn’s heart nearly stopped when he recognized its face.

And it was in that moment that Shawn was shown firsthand how cruel and sick the world could be.

Tears immediately sprung to his eyes as he gasped, “Kevin?”

Except it wasn’t him. That couldn’t be his husband. That’s not how he last remembered him.

No longer was his tan skin, beautiful green eyes, and soft brown hair. No. What lied before him was Kevin in a mummified state, his skin a greenish/grayish hue, hair thin and stringy, eyes milky, and nails dirty with blood and grime as his hands stretched out towards Shawn in a manic manner.

Shawn felt sick to his stomach, this not being the reunion he’d envisioned. Tears warped his sight as he slowly walked towards his husband. His voice trembled, “Kev?” But the only answer he received was strained groaning.

“No,” Shawn whispered, shaking his head in disbelief. He walked a little closer, saying, “Babe,” before jumping back as it made an attempt to grab him.

A sob escaped the blond’s lips as he realized that his Kevin was gone, the man he loved no longer recognizable in the monster before him. He whispered, “What did they do to you?”

There was another failed attempt to get to Shawn, the blond’s heart breaking more than it already had. Shawn wiped at his eyes, saying quietly, “At least you kept your promise.” They did find their way back to each other, however bittersweet.

Despite Kevin’s hungry attempts to grab him, Shawn continued to talk to the man through broken sobs. “Thank you for protecting me, Kevin. I’m so sorry this happened to you.” He broke down, falling to his knees, not having the strength to stand.

But he had to be strong because that’s what Kevin would want of him. Now that his husband was gone, Shawn only had himself to depend on. And that was a scary thing to come to terms with.

It took some time, but Shawn eventually collected himself. He stood up and looked at Kevin not wanting the man, or whatever was left of him, to suffer anymore.

He tightened his grip on his gun, raising it as he whispered, “I love you.” Then he let off a shot, feeling like a piece of his soul died right along with the man in front of him.

“I haven’t been the same since,” Shawn said with unease. “I relied on him for everything, and without him, I was lost and clueless on what to do. But Kevin lost his life trying to protect me, and I’d be damned if I were going to let it go to waste.”

As he heard Shawn’s story, Bret couldn’t help but feel sorry for the man. Bret’s situation wasn’t easy by any means, but at least he had his family during the beginning of the outbreak. But Shawn had to not only go through it alone, but witness the death of his husband.

“What happened after that?"

“I was forced to grow up. I’d been coddled my whole life – spoiled as a kid, protected by my friends, and then there’s Kevin who’d lecture me if I even attempted to open a door for myself. But after his death, I had to take the reins. So I shoved down my emotions, not even having time to grieve as I focused on surviving. I headed back home to pack a bag of essentials and left. I haven’t been back since.”  

Suddenly, Shawn’s rough personality made a lot more sense to Bret.

“My God. Shawn, I’m so sorry-”

“Don’t,” he said thickly, that being the last thing he wanted to hear. “You wanted to know about me so badly, so there you go.”

Not wanting to upset Shawn, Bret instead asked, “How’d you end up in Canada?”

Shawn lifted a brow at the sudden question, lightly asking, “What makes you think I’m not Canadian?”

Bret faltered, wondering if it was a trick question. “There’s not a lot of people around here with southern accents.”

Shawn smiled faintly, surprising Bret as it was the first time he’d seen a genuine smile come from the man “I’m from Texas, but moved to Detroit after marrying Kevin. We agreed on buying a house there so we could be closer to his widowed mother. After losing Kevin, I didn’t have the strength to stay in that house again.”

Bret nodded, “Yeah, I get it,” feeling the same way about his situation with his parents.

“After I packed my bag, I took the car and left for the border. I came to Canada hoping the outbreak hadn’t spread this way, which it hadn’t at that time, but that didn’t last long. I eventually ran out of gas and have been on foot ever since. I just kept moving, settling wherever Walkers weren’t. I eventually found a nice cabin out in the woods until some asshole broke in trying to steal my food.”

Bret’s cheeks heated in embarrassment, but he was put at ease at the light expression on Shawn’s face. “I’ll never not be sorry about that, you know,” Bret offered.

Shawn only sighed before continuing, “And now I’m here.”

“Now we’re here,” Bret softly corrected.

Shawn held his eyes on Bret, giving a look that Bret couldn’t decipher. “Yeah, we are.” A silence floated between the two before Shawn said offhandedly, “Kevin would be so shocked to know how far I’ve made it on my own. I was so carefree and ditzy, it was a problem.”

“You? Ditzy?” From what he’d witnessed, Shawn and the word ditzy didn’t even belong in the same sentence. The blond was easily one of the smartest people he’d met in the post-apocalyptic world.

“Yeah. Crazy how this world can change a person,” Shawn said before standing up.

Bret watched as the blond headed to his backpack, digging in search of something before sitting back down in front of Bret. He opened the palm of his hand to reveal a beautiful silver ring looped around a necklace.

Shawn said fondly, “I still have my ring. I made it into a necklace a while ago because my fingers got too skinny from my poor diet. Didn’t want it flying off my hand. But nowadays I keep it tucked away in my bag so I won’t lose it.”

“It’s pretty,” he mentioned as the diamonds sparkled in the moonlight.

Shawn cracked another smile, Bret trying to burn the image into his head noting that Shawn looked more beautiful when he smiled. Then he mentally slapped himself realizing this was not the time to think about that.

“You think so? Kevin was always good at picking jewelry.”

Bret looked on sadly seeing Shawn trying to smile away the pain. He wished he could comfort the man, but Shawn seemed disinterested in receiving sympathy.

Before Shawn could allow himself to get emotional, he cleared his throat, blinking his eyes a few times before standing again saying, “That’s enough talking for the night.” He placed the ring back inside his bag before heading back to the window to continue his watch shift. Bret went to sleep that night with more respect for Shawn, realizing there was more to him than what meets the eye.

[tameodesza]

Envy (KevinShawn)

AO3 link | masterlist

Kevin comforts an upset Shawn after Kevin wins the WWF Championship belt

Shawn exited the overcrowded hotel room in desperate need for some fresh air. Unbeknownst to him, his and Kevin’s hotel room became the destination for the kliq and a few other wrestlers to celebrate Kevin’s WWF Championship win that night after the sold-out house show at Madison Square Garden.

As much as Shawn loved being around his friends, he needed a moment to himself, especially after hearing Kevin say, “I don’t even care about being champion. I’m more excited about the payday.”

That was the issue.

Shawn always wanted to be the champion. He knew so ever since the age of 12. He was meant for it. He craved it as well as everything else that came with it – the fame, the glory, the money, the respect. He wanted it all and was always determined to make his dreams become a reality.

From his days of training with his mentor, Jose Lothario, to the days leading up to his WWF debut, Shawn never lost sight of his goal. He’d proven himself to Vince time and time again that he was valuable to the company. He’d been in a successful tag team, he’d been a star as the Intercontinental Champion, and he was easily a crowd favorite.

However, he still hadn’t become the WWF Champion.

When Shawn caught sight of Kevin Nash on WCW television, his initial interest in the man was purely for selfish reasons – use Kevin as a bodyguard to help lift his own career.

His career and popularity certainly did improve, and inadvertently, so did his love life. Shawn never planned on getting romantically involved with Kevin, especially with how unsuccessful he had been at dating his last tag team partner, Marty Jannetty. But Kevin was hard to resist, especially when he’d openly flirt with Shawn, not caring if anyone were around.

So that became their new arrangement. Coworkers during the day. Lovers at night. It worked out perfectly for Shawn.

What he didn’t expect was for Kevin to quickly gain the interest of Vince McMahon. Instead of being the side character that supported Shawn, Vince decided to start pushing Kevin into the limelight.

Shawn was happy for Kevin. He was so proud of what his boyfriend was able to accomplish in such a short period of time. However, it was hard for Shawn to ignore the pang in his chest at knowing he still hadn’t achieved his childhood dream.

Despite the numerous years that Shawn had put in, Kevin was still able to surpass him just like that.

It hurt even more considering that Kevin didn’t really want it as badly as him. The older man admitted it on several occasions. It was never Kevin’s dream, and Shawn couldn’t help but resent him a little for it.

Shawn let out a sigh as he made his way out of the hotel doors into the cool breeze of the night. He walked towards the parking lot with no destination in mind. Thankfully for him, it was pretty late at night, and they’d managed to keep the location of their hotel-stay on the downlow, so there were no fans in sight.

He just needed to be alone, as far away from the noise as possible.

He roamed the empty parking lot until he spotted his rental car in the distance. He hastily made his way over to the car, quickly whipping out the keys from his pocket to get into the car. Once inside, he slammed the door shut and sank into the silence that rang clear in the car.

Finally alone, Shawn closed his eyes as he let out a few deep breaths in an attempt to calm himself down. However, his efforts proved fickle as tears began to prick behind his eyelids.

“Come on, Shawn,” he muttered to himself, shaking his head in disbelief at how emotional he was becoming. “Suck it up.”

Unfortunately, the tears didn’t stop, and eventually he gave up trying. One lone tear escaped and was followed by another. He sobbed to himself as the negative thoughts clouded his judgment, reminding him that he was a failure, that he was worthless, and that he would never accomplish anything.

He couldn’t help but wonder if he should finally give up his dreams.

Kevin didn’t know how long it had been since Shawn slipped out the hotel room.

Shawn disappearing from the group wasn’t anything new. As social and extroverted as the younger man was, he’d sometimes get overwhelmed, needing to step out for air before returning back to the group.

However, when ten minutes turned into fifteen minutes, then twenty minutes, then almost thirty minutes, Kevin knew that something was off.

He sat his beer down, announcing to the room, “I’ll be right back, guys. I need to find Shawn.”

“Woah, woah, big man,” said Scott, “You just became champion. You think it’s a good idea to walk out there by yourself? You might get spotted.”

Kevin haphazardly shoved on a hat and sunglasses, a poor excuse of a disguise. “There. Happy? I’ll be back.”

Kevin carefully peaked his head out the door, not seeing anyone in sight, before heading to the lobby. After doing a quick scan of the nearly empty lobby, he decided to make his way outside, knowing Shawn couldn’t have gone very far, especially with the younger man having a few drinks in him.

He didn’t have to do much more guessing on Shawn’s whereabouts once he spotted a blond head sitting in the driver’s seat of the rental car.

Shawn jumped in a startle when he heard a light tap on the car window, looking up to see Kevin looking at him with an evident frown. The taller man removed his sunglasses and hat before gesturing for Shawn to roll down the window, which he did reluctantly.

“Hey, babe. What are you doing out here?”

When Shawn didn’t answer, looking away from Kevin to avoid eye contact, the taller man coaxed, “Shawn. Hey, look at me.”

When the only answer he received was a sniff from Shawn, Kevin reached a hand into the car to gently turn Shawn’s face towards him. His heart nearly crumbled once he saw the red-rimmed eyes, tear-streaked cheeks, and light pink nose that the younger man sported.

“Shawn, what’s wrong?”

Shawn pulled away stating, “Nothing.”

An uncomfortable silence floated between the two before Kevin said, “I’m coming in.”

Before Shawn could protest, Kevin was already making his way over to the passenger’s side, quickly opening the door to get inside to give Shawn his full attention.

Needing a distraction, Shawn rolled up his window to give himself an excuse not to see the worried look Kevin was giving.

“Shawn, please tell me what’s wrong.” He still received no response. “Are you drunk?”

“No. I told you it’s nothing, Kevin,” Shawn said in mere frustration.

Sensing Shawn’s irritation, Kevin grabbed one of Shawn’s hands, lacing their fingers together before stating, “I know you better than that. Why are you upset?”

Shawn took in a deep breath, sniffing again as he used his free hand to dab the lingering tears away from his cheeks. “It’s stupid.”

Kevin used his thumb to lightly stroke the back of Shawn’s hand that he was holding. “I’m listening.”

It took a moment for Shawn to speak up again as he gathered his thoughts, but Kevin didn’t rush him. He knew how hard it was for Shawn to openly talk about his emotions. He was still working on it and had come quite far from where he used to be. But it was evident that he still had a ways to go.

Shawn lightly squeezed Kevin’s hand before solemnly asking, “Is it bad that I’m jealous of my own boyfriend?”

Kevin lifted a brow, needing to do a double take at the absurdity of Shawn’s question. He let out a light chuckle. “Jealous? Of me? What’s there to be jealous of?”

His smile faltered as he noticed Shawn’s frown deepen, bottom lip quivering as if he were about to start crying again.

Kevin internally panicked, frustrated at himself for causing Shawn to become more upset. Before he could say anything else potentially hurtful, he took a moment to think, finally connecting the dots on what could have Shawn in such a funk.

“It’s about the championship, isn’t it?”

Shawn nodded before leaning down to place his head on Kevin’s shoulder as much as the confined space of the car would allow him. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok-”

“No, it’s not,” Shawn said, shooting his head up to look at Kevin. “It’s not at all. I don’t want you to think I’m not happy for you. Because, baby, I truly am. I’m so happy you’re getting a push from the company.”

Kevin used his free hand to cup Shawn’s face. “Then why are you so upset?”

“Because,” Shawn trailed off, looking down at his lap before Kevin forced him to look at him again, “it just reminded me that I still haven’t reached my dream.”

And Kevin feels like the biggest dick in the world.

Of course Shawn would be upset. Shawn always voiced to him how much being the WWF Champion would mean to him, and how the fact that he still hadn’t achieved it yet really irked him. Kevin was upset with himself for how inconsiderate he’d been of Shawn’s feelings.

Kevin completely understood where Shawn was coming from. He’d never yearned to be the champion. It was never a life goal of his like it was for Shawn. However, once Vince made the offer, Kevin couldn’t refuse. Being champ meant more fame, money, and success.

But as Kevin looked into Shawn’s beautiful misty blue eyes, he found himself questioning if it was all worth it if it meant hurting Shawn.

“I’ll drop the belt.”

It was Shawn’s turn to be shocked at what came out of his boyfriend’s mouth. He widened his eyes, lightly shoving Kevin’s chest as he exclaimed, “Are you fucking crazy?!”

“So I’ve been told-”

“I’m being serious! You just got the title! Vince already has his mind made up about you being the top guy. There’s no way you can drop it, Kev!”

“The belt doesn’t mean that much to me as it does for you.”

“But Kevin-”

“I’d do anything for you, Shawn.”

“But-”

“I love you.”

That stopped Shawn in his tracks.

Yes, they were in an exclusive relationship. Yes, they already acted like a married couple, as Scott and Sean liked to point out. And yes, they spent more time with each other than their own families.

However, neither man had been bold enough to express those three words to each other…until now.

Shawn faltered. “You what?”

Kevin smiled before pecking Shawn lightly on the lips. “You heard me. I love you, Shawn. It shouldn’t come as a surprise.”

“I mean, it doesn’t,” Shawn said in bewilderment. “I just wasn’t expecting for you to lay it on me like that.” He rested his head against Kevin’s, shyly whispering, “I love you too by the way.”

Kevin gave another peck. “That’s good to know.”

A silent moment passed by before Shawn said, “Please don’t ruin your career for me, stupid. I’ll be fine. I know I’ll be champ in due time. I just need to be patient, and you know I’ve never been good at that.”

Kevin chuckled before caressing Shawn’s cheek. “I just don’t want you being upset. I hate seeing you cry.”

Shawn sighed. “I know. What can I say? I’m an emotional man.”

Kevin pulled back to fully look at Shawn. “Hey, you’ve got to start believing in yourself, ok? You’re so damn talented, Shawn, and I need you to start seeing that. Can you promise me that?”

Shawn nodded. “I’ll try.”

“Are you feeling better now?”

“Yeah, a little. I just needed a moment to let everything out.” He lifted his arms up to wrap around Kevin’s neck. “But thank you. The fact that you would even consider dropping the belt means a lot, Kev. I mean it’s a pretty reckless idea, but-”

“But that’s why you love me,” he finished smugly.

Shawn playfully nudged Kevin’s head with his finger. “Yeah, yeah. I really do love you, Kevin.”

“I know.”

“Like a lot.”

Kevin grinned. “Even better.”

“That’s why I feel even shittier about this belt situation. I just feel so guilty for feeling like this.”

“Hey, your feelings are valid, ok? Thanks for being honest with me, baby.”

“Of course. And while I’m in this honest mood, there’s something else that’s making me sad,” he said with a dramatic pout.

“Hm? What is it?”

“You didn’t say it back?”

“Say what back?”

“That you love me a lot.”

A smile tugs at the corner of Kevin’s lips before he leaned forward, placing a soft gentle kiss on Shawn’s lips. He barely pulled back as he whispered. “I love you, like a lot, too, Shawnie.”

Shawn nearly melted at the nickname he loved to hear from Kevin.

“Alright,” said Shawn in an upbeat voice. “Enough with the sad stuff. Let’s go back inside and finish celebrating. It’s a big night for you.”

Kevin grinned. “Is it going to be an even bigger night later on?”

“You’re the champ, big daddy. You call the shots now.” Shawn winked as he unwrapped himself from Kevin.

Kevin unapologetically cut the celebration short that night, promptly kicking everyone out the hotel room to have Shawn all to himself.