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[alucardsinep]

985 kaloria

[kattiperkele]

Katti kokkaa - Herkkutortillat

Koska elämässä täytyy olla jotakin luksusta, tehdään tortilloja. Tämäkin on maailman helpoin ohje, johon tarvitaan ainoastaan matala lautanen, haarukka ja kaksi pientä lusikkaa. Ja täytevaihtoehtojahan on runsaasti, mutta nyt haetaankin mahdollisimman vähän sotkua ja vaivaa. Ja ettei pienessä opiskelijamallin lukaalissa tarvitsisi missään tapauksessa käyttää mitään mikä tuottaa lämpöä. Sitä on riittämiin jo valmiiksi.

Tähän herkkuun sinun tulee woltata tai hakea lähikaupasta:

1 pussi babypinaattia (löytyy vihannesosastolta. Pirkan babypinaatti toimii hyvin Katin mielestä) 1 pussi jääsalaattia (joku pirkka tai kotimainen on oikein passeli) 1 paketti salaattijuustoa (X-tralla on sellainen isompi paketti) 1 purkki Maku-kurkkuja (Felix, felix, felix, felix, herkkuja ruokapöytään) 1 purkki juustodippiä/valmiskermaviilidippiä (halpikset on ihan jees. Kermaviilidipin voi myös tehdä itse jos haluaa, mutta valmis maksaa melkein jopa vähemmän kuin dippipussi ja kermaviili) 1 pkt Vuolu-kanaa (Fajitas on Katin lemppari) 1 pkt tortillalättyjä (Pirkka tai Coop on ihan hyvä)

Ja sitten itse asiaan.

Avaa tortillalättypaketti ja laita yksi lautaselle. Jos olet outo, lämmitä se mikrossa. Katti ei jaksa lämmitellä mitään.

"Voitele" tortillalätyn keskiosa dipillä. Jos olet rikas, niin Santa Marian Nacho Cheese-dippi on maailman parhainta herkkua.

Revi pinaattia ja jääsalaattia lätyn päälle. Tai laita vaikka kokonaisena, jos jaksat pureskella. Niin, ja mitä enemmän sen parempi.

Laita päälle 3-4 kurkkuviipaletta.

Asettele 4-6 salaattijuustokuutiota.

Lisää vähän dippiä. Koska sehän on se pääasia.

Laita päälle hieman kanaa. Ole säästeliäs. Vuolu-kana maksaa n. 4€ paketti.

Kääräise paketti kasaan miten tykkäät. Voit opetella taittelemaan burritoja, jos koet että henkiset voimavarat riittävät siihen. Katilla ei riitä. Kattia väsyttää. Katilla on nälkä.

Lautasen päällä saa tehtyä kolme burritoa, jos oikein osaa taktikoida.

Syö. Nauti vähäisestä tiskistä. Ja siitä että näitä voi syödä monta ilman että menee ihan vararikkoon.

Vinkkivitonen! Jos jostain syystä voitit lotossa kympin, kokeile ihmeessä purkkipaprikaa kaveriksi.

Vinkkikutonen! On parasta kesällä kun kämppä on kuin sauna etkä todellakaan halua keittää tai paistaa mitään.

Vinkkiseiskanen! Jos kuitenkin koet että paistaminen on okei, kokeile paistaa jotain jauhelihaa. Lisää erilliseen lasirasiaan mozzarellajuustoraastetta. Laita vastapaistetut jauhelihat rasiaan ja töki jollakin puhtaana olevalla aterimella jauheliha ja juusto sekaisin. Juusto sulaa jauhelihan lämmössä mukavasti.

Bon apetiitti ja silleen. Seuraavaan kertaan.

[neutronstarsign]

okay here is the recipe.

for the pastry, you will need

150 g salted butter, softened

1 dl* sugar

1 egg

3 dl all purpose flour

1 tsp baking powder

for the filling you will need

2 dl kermaviili/sour cream**

1 egg

0,5 dl sugar

0,5 tsp vanilla extract

+ 200 g blueberries, fresh or frozen***

method:

heat up your oven to 200 celsius/400 fahrenheit.

prepare the pastry by mixing the ingredients until combined. if you want to get fancy you can whisk the butter and sugar into a soft foam and fold the dry ingredients in slowly but in my experience it really doesn’t matter.

spread your pastry on a lined 28 cm diameter pie dish/tart tin.

spread your blueberries evenly on top of the pastry.

combine the filling ingredients and pour evenly over the blueberries.

bake in the centre of the oven for approx 30-35 minutes. the crust should be golden brown and the filling set (it might wobble a bit in the centre but that’s fine).

enjoy with some coffee or tea.

_ *1 dl is 100 ml or approx. 2/5 cups if you use an arbitrary antiquated system that makes no sense.

** kermaviili is a type of nordic sour cream which is less fatty and a bit more acidic. sour cream or creme fraiche will do for this recipe, although they have a higher fat content.

*** finnish blueberries are actually wild bilberries, and have more flavour than the cultivated ones you find in most grocery stores. the cultivated ones are fine for this dish, although they are milder.

one of the best things about knowing osint is that i can hunt down that one really good blueberry pie recipe from a blog that was taken down years ago.

[sneakend]

Hyvää joulua, @fruzsislangblrstuff  !!! I had the honor of being your substitute santa for @langblrsecretsanta this year. I made a list of interesting Finnish Christmas traditions with related vocabulary. And since you like baking I added some Finnish recipes at the end! Hope you have a great year 2020!

♢ food ♢

Casseroles

Casseroles are a staple of Finnish Christmas, enough so that most people get sick of them by December 25th. The traditional Christmas dinner includes casseroles made of potatoes, carrots, liver and rutabaga. My family usually also includes a macaroni casserole even though this is a food that people eat throughout the year. It’s great for kids too since they’re often not that into the other casseroles. Moreover, sweet potato casserole has gained popularity in recent years and I think I even saw parsnip casserole at the grocery store this year.

laatikko = a casserole (the same word also means box so a cardboard box would be pahvilaatikko). The name of a specific casserole can be formed just by adding the name of a vegetable in front of this word, peruna (potato) + laatikko = perunalaatikko (potato casserole) just like in English.

bataatti = a sweet potato

lanttu = a rutabaga

palsternakka = a parsnip

peruna = a potato

porkkana = a carrot

makaroni = macaroni

maksa = a liver

Rosolli

A bound salad eaten mostly as a cold side dish, in particular as part of the traditional Finnish Christmas meal.

Rosolli is made of cooked, diced root vegetables, especially beetroot, carrot and potato, often combined with one or more of pickled cucumber (of either the vinegar or brine type), raw onion and apple. It is often served with a dressing made of whipped cream or a soured cream product available in Finland called kermaviili (being a type of viili made with sour cream), laced with vinegar or the pickling liquid of beetroot, which also colours the cream pink.

My personal opinion is that rosolli is gross but each to their own.

punajuuri = a beetroot

suolakurkku = pickled cucumber (literally “salt cucumber”)

etikka = vinegar

kermavaahto = whipped cream (literally “cream foam”)

Rice porridge (riisipuuro)

A warm porridge eaten with cinnamon and sugar. Can be eaten either as a dessert or breakfast on Christmas. A whole almond is hidden in the porridge and the one who finds it in their bowl gets to make a wish.

kaneli = cinnamon

sokeri = sugar

manteli = an almond

Christmas tart (joulutorttu)

A Finnish Christmas pastry, traditionally made from puff pastry in the shape of a star or pinwheel and filled with prune jam and often dusted with icing sugar. Lately people have also started using different jams or even caramel as a filling for these. Some years back there was some controversy in Sweden over the fact that some people think these pastries resemble swastikas. But not to worry, there are several different shapes one can choose from!

luumu = a prune/plum

Chocolate boxes

These are one of the most traditional (and lazy) gifts year after year. Every Christmas everyone gets at least a few of these, eats their favourites and leaves the rest to gather dust until they’re inedible. Every Christmas the supermarkets have special deals where you get a bunch of chocolate boxes relatively cheap (what’s really cheap in Finland?). The most popular are the ones by Fazer and Panda. Other popular Christmas sweets include green jellies, Julia and Budapest.

suklaarasia = a chocolate box

Glögg (glögi)

A Scandinavian, spiced, usually alcoholic drink, served warm. There are many different types in Finland, including a good selection of non-alcoholic glögg that’s sweet and even fit for children. The prices vary from under one euro to 20 euros (potentially even more). Some people add raisins and almonds to their glögg.

mauste = spice

rusina = a raisin

♢traditions♢

Little Christmas (pikkujoulu)

A Finnish traditional party held to anticipate Christmas. The Pikkujoulu party is non-formal, highly festive, and themed after Christmas. Pikkujoulu parties are held by various communities, organisations, companies, or just among friends. Pikkujoulu differs from Christmas as more free-form and less religious.

Saint Lucy’s Day (Lucian päivä) 

A Christian feast day observed on 13 December, commemorating Lucia of Syracuse, an early-4th-century martyr, who according to legend brought food and aid to Christians hiding in the Roman catacombs, wearing a candlelit wreath on her head to light her way and leave her hands free to carry as much food as possible. Her feast day, which coincided with the shortest day of the year prior to calendar reforms, is widely celebrated as a festival of light. Falling within the Advent season, Saint Lucy's Day is viewed as a precursor of Christmastide.

Saint Lucy's Day is celebrated most widely in Scandinavia and in Italy, with each emphasising a different aspect of her story. The Finnish celebrations have been historically tied to Swedish culture and the Swedish-speaking Finns. The St. Lucy of Finland has been elected since 1949 and she is crowned in the Helsinki Cathedral. Local St. Lucies are elected in almost every place where there is a Swedish populace in Finland. The Finnish-speaking population has also lately begun to embrace the celebrations. (Santa Lucia)

marttyyri = a martyr

pyhimys = a saint

seppele = a wreath

valo = light

Declaration of Christmas Peace (joulurauhan julistus)

Christmas Peace is a tradition based on old Scandinavian legislation created by Birger Jarl in the 13th century, extending the tradition of the Truce of God. Offenders who committed crimes on religious holidays like Christmas were given harsher punishments. The Declaration of Christmas Peace has remained in Finland where it is an essential part of the Christmas tradition.

Declaration of Christmas Peace is announced in several Finnish cities on Christmas Eve. The oldest and most popular event is held at noon at the Old Great Square of the former Finnish capital Turku where the declaration has been read since the 1320s. The Turku declaration has been broadcast by the Finnish Broadcasting Company since 1935. (on YouTube)

julistus = a declaration

rauha = peace

Kauneimmat joululaulut

Literally the most beautiful Christmas carols. An annual event organized by and held in local churches is numerous cities before Christmas. People gather to sing the most beloved Finnish Christmas carols and have a chance to donate money to a charity. The event has become an important Christmas tradition to a lot of people and many attend even if they aren’t religious.

kaunis = beautiful

laulu = a song

kirkko = a church

Heavy Christmas (Raskasta Joulua)

A music project from Finland founded by Erkka Korhonen. Raskasta Joulua have recorded traditional Christmas carols and Christmas hits in a Heavy metal style. Their albums and tours have featured appearances of many notable Finnish metal vocalists.  Raskasta Joulua have toured every year since 2005 and the 3 concert tour has become an annual tradition. (on YouTube | x | x | x)

Depressing Christmas carols

Many of the most beloved FInnish Christmas carols are quite melancholy and depressing. Here are some examples:

Varpunen jouluaamuna (The Sparrow on a Christmas Morning) - About a girl meeting her dead little brother who visits her in the form of a sparrow. (on YouTube)

Sylvian joululaulu (Sylvia's Christmas Song) - About a caged bird that can never return to its homeland. Zachris Topelius who wrote the original poem opposed the custom of trapping birds and piercing their eyes so they could be used to attract other birds. (on YouTube)

Konsta Jylhän joululaulu (Konsta Jylhä’s Christmas Carol) - About a little child visiting their mother’s grave on Christmas. (on YouTube)

Christmas sauna

You absolutely can’t have Christmas without sauna! It’s common to clean the sauna before Christmas and to use candles and lanterns to create a cozy atmosphere. It is also possible to buy a frozen vihta/vasta (a bunch of leafy, fragrant silver birch used to gently beat oneself) in some stores and thaw it for Christmas. Moreover, in Finland elves aren’t limited to Christmas elves but it’s believed that every sauna has its own elf that takes care of it.

♢items♢

Candles

Though candles are common in many places during Christmas, in Finland one should visit a graveyard during Christmas Eve to either light a candle or to simply admire the hundreds of candles already burning. For the Finnish independece day on 6th of December many also buy special blue and white candles (the colors are the same as in the Finnish flag).

kynttilä = a candle

hautausmaa = a graveyard

Poinsettia

This is a very popular Christmas flower in Finland and can be found in nearly all stores that sell flowers in December. It is called joulutähti in Finnish, which literally means Christmas star. People often gift this to others during Christmas. Hyacinths are another common Christmas flower and stores sell them in many different colors.

kukka = a flower

hyasintti = hyacinth

Elf door (tonttuovi)

A tiny decorative door through which the Christmas elves can wander. These are a rather recent craze in FInland but every year it’s possible to find more and more acessories for elf doors in the stores. There are tiny mailboxes, snowmen, sleds, presents, lanterns, Christmas trees, brooms etc. It’s possible to make an elf door by yourself, to buy one you have to paint or to get one that’s completely ready to set up.

ovi = a door

tonttu = an elf (like a Christmas elf, not Legolas)

kelkka = a sled

lumiukko = a snowman

lyhty = a lantern

Advent calendar (joulukalenteri)

Though many Finns swear by the traditional chocolate advent calendar, other options have become available in the recent years. There are the ever popular tea, toy and cosmetics calendars but also ones for cats and dogs, calendars filled with fishing equipment and the most Finnish of all, a salmiakki advent calendar. Additionally, this year an ice cream calendar was released by Vanhan Porvoon jäätelötehdas. Nokian panimo also created a beer calendar consisting of 24 000 beer cans and costing 48 000 euros.

salmiakki = salty liquorice

jäätelö = ice cream

kalja/olut = beer

♢tv♢

Santa’s hotline (Joulupukin Kuuma linja)

A tv show shown every Christmas in which children can call Santa. People can also send Christmas greetings through email and they are read during the show. In between the calls different Christmas themed cartoons are played. (on YouTube)

The Joulukalenteri

Finnish for "The Christmas Calendar"; the English word "the" is part of the name, making it approximately "The The Christmas calendar". It was a 1997 Finnish television miniseries produced by MTV3 that was broadcast again in 1998, 2007 and 2017. It was based on the Danish series The Julekalender from 1991. The series came out in December 1997 with one episode per day, concluding on Christmas Eve. It’s still popular to this day and caused nightmares for me when I was a kid. (Different advent calendar shows for children are popular in Finland but this one’s aimed at adults.)

Santa Claus and the Magic Drum  (Joulupukki ja noitarumpu)

A 51 minute long Finnish-Hungarian animation released in 1996. The story is based on a 1995 children's book of the same name by Mauri Kunnas. The movie has been recorded in Finnish, English (British) and Swedish. It was made for TV broadcasting and was first shown on Christmas Eve 1996, and has been broadcast on YLE TV2 nearly every Christmas Eve since. (on YouTube)

joulupukki = Santa Claus

noita = a witch

rumpu = a drum

♢recipes♢

Christmas

potato casserole

carrot casserole

rutabaga casserole

macaroni casserole (I’m vegetarian so I always make this without eggs and replace the meat with soy)

rosolli

rice porridge

Christmas tart

More Finnish pastries

Runeberg torte (Runebergin torttu) = a Finnish pastry flavored with almonds and arrack or rum. It usually has raspberry jam encircled by a ring of icing on top. The torte is named after the Finnish poet Johan Ludvig Runeberg (1804–1877) who, according to legend, regularly enjoyed the torte with punsch for breakfast. Runeberg tortes are typically eaten only in Finland and are generally available in stores from the beginning of January to Runeberg's birthday on February 5.

Pulla = a mildly-sweet Finnish sweet roll or dessert bread flavored with crushed cardamom seeds and occasionally raisins or sliced almonds. Typically coated with egg wash and then sprinkled with white sugar or almonds.

Semla = a traditional sweet roll associated with Lent and especially Shrove Tuesday. Today, the Swedish-Finnish semla consists of a cardamom-spiced wheat bun which has its top cut off, and is then filled with a mix of milk and almond paste, topped with whipped cream. The cut-off top serves as a lid and is dusted with powdered sugar. In Finland, the bun is often filled with strawberry or raspberry jam instead of almond paste, and bakeries in Finland usually offer both versions.

pancake (pannukakku) = Structurally, the Finnish pancake resembles a hotcake, and is baked in an oven instead of using a frying pan.

Karelian pasty (karjalanpiirakka) = traditional pasties or pirogs from the region of Karelia. Today, the most familiar and common version has a thin rye crust with a filling of rice. Mashed potato and rice-and-carrot fillings are also commonly available. Butter, often mixed with chopped-up boiled egg (egg butter or munavoi), is spread over the hot pasties before eating.

spoon cookies (lusikkaleivät) = Lusikkaleivät are Finnish "spoon" cookies so named because they are shaped with a spoon. The inside of the spoon cookies is filled with a berry jam, either raspberry or strawberry.

mocha brownies (mokkapalat) = perhaps the most common treat in every child’s birthday party.

[hetvx]

1, 12, 15, 45, 53, 77, 88 :3 mukavaa sunnuntai iltaa

1. What’s one animal you wish you could have as a pet but can’t?

-rakastan lehmii!! mut ois ehkä pikkusen liian kunnianhimonen lemmikki mulle. ja no kissoja rakastan myös yli kaiken mutta oon allerginen nyyh.

12. Any hidden talents?

-ei kyl oikee tuu mitään mieleen?? en oikeen osaa mitään ees sillee ei-salaisesti lol

15. Favorite board game?

-rappakalja on hauska!

45. Least favorite color?

-neonvärit ja sähkönsininen ei sytytä

53. Favorite kind of pizza?

-mun unelmapizzas ois herkkusienii, oliivei ja vuohenjuustoo

77. Would you rather watch a TV show or a movie?

-sarja! mun keskittymiskyky ei nykyään oikeen riitä leffojen kattomiseen

88. What’s something you would rate 10/10?

-dis pussayy;;))) no eiii anteeks salee kermaviili & sipuli linssisipsit blue cheese dipil ja no mun hipsutustaidot on kyl erinomaiset myös

Kiitos samoin!! :3

[ruokahommia]

Pekoni-parsakaalisalaatti

2 hengelle 200g parsakaalia 100g pekonia Punasipuli Sopivasti keitettyä makaroonia Kourallinen Auringonkukan siemeniä Kourallinen rusinoita Loraus punaviini/balsamietikkaa Kastike: Puoli purkkia kermaviiliä 2-3 rkl majoneesia Laita makaronit kiehumaan. Parsakaalit voi laittaa makaronikattilan päälle siivilään höyrystymään (tai sulamaan, jos käyttää pakasteparsakaalia). Silppua pekoni kylmään pannuun ja paistele kunnes on vähän väriä. Siivuta punasipuli ja kuullota nopeasti pekonien kanssa pannussa. Sekoita ainekset kulhossa, lisää joukkoon auringonkukansiemenet ja rusinat ja lorauta joukkoon punaviinietikka. Sekoita kermaviili-majoneesikastike ja hämmennä salaatin sekaan.

[suppenzeit]

tantomile is named sourcream :~)

WAIT THE CATS IN THE 1986 HELSINKI RUN OF CATS HAD TRANSLATED NAMES??? IM SOBBING