#keep him in cinemas for the rest of his life). this episode is also the second in a row (on network's weirdly ordered set anyway; there

[mariocki]

Patrick Magee works to apprehend the villains as Parsons, the head of airport security in Dial 999: The Great Gold Robbery (1.4, ABC, 1958)

[kisilinramblings]

After the Wish - Adrien's side

Hi, everyone! Are you ready for some scene analysis? Like the title says, this post will focus on Adrien's scenes following the Wish.

Before I start though, I am very well aware the ending bring a lot of very passionnated and very opinated minds. This is why I am asking to please keep an open mind and keep things civil. I won't tolerate any bashing or rude comments. Both on this post and in my inbox. Keep in mind this analysis in my own interpretation of the shots and scenes based on my cinematographic knowledge as well as my viewing experience and memory of the 5 seasons of Miraculous.

I am sharing this analysis because I love the show and because analysing helps me better understand what I see.

Also, this is a leak free analysis. I only analyze and make conclusions based on what it is shown to us on-screen.

So, if you are ok with staying respectful and open to see the episode through my lens, you are more than welcome to continue reading.

Without further ado, let's go!

After the whole universe was engulfed by the light of Gabriel's Wish, the white screen fade to a close up of Adrien sleeping. Marinette's head then block the shot temporarily before Adrien awaken, smiling. We can guess she kissed him.

This shot personally reminds me of the fairy tales in which the knight kisses the princess to awake her from her curse. And it isn't coincidental if the very first image we see after Gabriel made the Wish is Adrien. There is meaning in that. In fact, I want to point out the shot choice itself because I find it unusual.

We are facing a tight close up facing directly Adrien while he is sleeping and then awakes. Normally, we are more used to a medium shot which allow to see the character is lying down and frame both characters. The camera is also normally placed on the side and not directly facing one particular character. Again in order to see both actors at the same time. Think of Disney Snow White or Sleeping Beauty for example.

And even in more modern ones.

You know which other character in the show who had their eyes closed, often shown in a frontal angle and who we were anticipating to wake up? Émilie.

Except this isn't Émilie who awakes, but Adrien.

Not only this tight close up gives a lot of importance and relevance to him, but Adrien is so in our face that it feels like nothing around him mattered, not even the kiss Adrien received. What matters is Adrien. Solely him. And Adrien is smiling.

Then the camera starts to expand little to little to unveil Adrien's "new world". In cinema, we are quite used to start a scene is with help of wide shot before cuting to closer shots. Here, it is the other way around. Which confers a sense of mystery to the scene.

The first thing Adrien sees is Marinette, the girl he is in love with, at his side, bathed by the summer sunlight. The light choice hints we got a time ellipse between this moment and the previous scene.

As Adrien rises up we see their friends having fun in what we guess is the Agreste Mansion Garden.

The artists are painting a mural inspired by Delacroix's famous painting Liberty Leading the People where the characters are remplaced by La Résistance members and led by Ms Bustier depicted as Liberty herself. She is leading the youth to freedom, to a better future.

The rest of the class and their allies are playing in the pool or chilling together.

This series of shots show us the Agreste Mansion garden flourishing with life. In the background, the flowers are all in full bloom, the plants cover most of the gray stones of the mansion, garnishing those with vibrant green tones. On-screen people laughing and having fun.

Hawkmoth (Party Crasher) : I don't feel any negative emotions. There's only... Joy? What is going on in my house?!

This series of shots shows how we are at the opposite at how life used to be for Adrien. His friends can come over and party with him. We see members of both his family and found family. Adrien isn't trapped inside his home-prison anymore. He isn't isolated anymore. He is surrounded by people who love and care about him. And Gabriel is absent from the picture.

Like Bug Noire said earlier during this episode, Adrien already had all of that before the Wish. Adrien went to school and made friends on his own. He wanted to have a birthday party at his home (Bubbler). He wanted to hang and have fun with his friends on multiple occasions. But Gabriel was always the biggest obstacle for Adrien to have those moments, those memories.

It is Gabriel who kept his son isolated. Because Gabriel was living in the past and was unable to move on with life while Adrien decided he wanted more in life than being stuck inside a cocoon. And at the end of Revolution, Adrien knew what he wanted :

Adrien : Father, please, I know what I want. Let me live my life here in Paris with Marinette and my friends. Gabriel : You must go through with this like an Agreste. That's what your mother would have wanted. Adrien : No, I'm sure that Mom would have just wanted me to be happy.

And, in the end, Adrien's wish is fulfilled.

One last sidenote before I continue concerns that one shot.

Despite not being in the center of the shot, Nathalie seems to be doing better than the last time we saw her. She has a least more colors and has gained her red streak of hair back. Her pose however seems... limited. Maybe her body is still weak from the illness afflicting her. Maybe it is due to budget constraint. Or maybe it is both. And remember what Bug Noire said to Gabriel at the end of their fight : she estimated Nathalie had only a few hours left. And we are weeks from now. Either Bug Noire was wrong in her prognostic or Nathalie survived.

Émilie : Adrien will be well surrounded. He'll have you Nathalie, and he'll have his father, if Gabriel agrees to give up on his madness... and on me. Adrien will have all the love he needs to be happy.

Anyway, the group pauses their activities to watch a new show called "Monde Nouveau" (litteraly "New World") and hosted by Alec.

Alec as we know, has changed to become an icon about being yourself and making your dream come true. And him being the host of that new show instead of a character like Nadja, means that we are looking at an happy and positive vision of things.

He interviews Caline Bustier, now both Mayor of Paris and mother of a girl named Harmonie. She shares her program for a better future to us, the audience.

As she talks about her eco-rules, we see sketches supporting her vision. At the bottom right, we recognize the Tsurugi company logo, but next to it there is a new one we haven't seen before.

Next, we see an unveiling of the statue of Gabriel Agreste, which confirms that Gabriel has died. His statue is made of recycled Alliances put out of commission after Monarch's last attack.

Gabriel's statue is his entire height. Gabriel was already a tall character when he was living and his statue is even taller than him. His chin is up, proud. It is almost like he is superior, looking up like that. The camera slight low angle also contributes to this impression I have. Also, he holds a pencil like the designer he is.

Tomoe : Beyond the visionary entrepreneur and the genius creator, it's the hero we celebrate today.

This is how the Parisians in-universe see him. They are unaware of Gabriel's secret identity. They are unaware of the truth. They only know of the image the professional him gave away and they believed he died in an attempt to stop Monarch.

I want to point out the fact Gabriel's statue is made of Alliances. The very tool he uses to try and defeat Ladybug and Chat Noir. He turned Adrien and Kagami's image into avatar for this product against their will to sell both the Alliances and an illusion. He deformed the truth with their avatars by presenting them as a couple (Revelation), or make deepfakes out of them (Representation and Conformation). Now, Gabriel's statue, his image, is made of the very same tool he used. And the Alliances, despite being put out of commission, still contribute to blur the line of what is truth and what is false in regards of his character to the masses.

With this statue made of Alliances, the parisians are honoring the "perfect" and "pure" image they have of Gabriel. I cannot help but think that this huge statue is bound to create great shadows. And even if the real Gabriel is gone, something of him remains and will continue to have an impact.

Tomoe then talks about continuing Gabriel's legacy. To us, the audience, those words have an ominous double meaning as Tomoe was Gabriel's ally until the end and helped him in many of his schemes. And she confirms she will continue that work.

Caline then gets to talk about her new school model which pleases very much everybody as they cheer all together. It will allows Marinette, Adrien and all their friends to remain together while allowing them to explore and grow in the field that please them respectfully.

Then we cut the the sun setting as the cheers are fading away. It is the end of the day and everyone has gone home.

Adrien is now alone in the garden where his mother's statue used to be. White butterflies are flying around. Marinette joins him as he is fidgeting with his parents' twin ring.

Marinette : You are not wearing it? Adrien : When Ladybug gave it to me, she told me how my father helped her defeat Monarch. At the risk of his life.

With this, we know that Ladybug granted Gabriel's dying wish.

Gabriel : Marinette. Make sure that Adrien never knows about the villain that I was, but instead, that he remembers the times I tried to be a good father.

Was it Marinette's place to accept that burden to cover the truth? To acquiesce to her archenemy's demand? Of course not, but that is how kind she is and how flawed she can be. For Adrien's happiness, Maribug is willing to do so. We, as the audience, know it can only last so long the secret is sealed. And no one among Gabriel, Marinette, Nathalie, Félix, Kagami nor Plagg is aware the secret was already breached outside the family circle.

But for the time being, everyone who knows will keep the fact that Gabriel was Monarch a secret.

But even without the truth, Adrien is conflicted about his feelings towards his father. We see that as Adrien answers Marinette's question, he leans a bit towards her, but there is no contact. His eyes are fixated on the ring. Adrien is distant and inside a bubble of doubt about himself. There is a weight, a legacy, he associates with that family ring that he is not sure if he can bear.

Adrien : I don't know if I'll ever manage to be like him.

It is only when Marinette puts her hands on his, covering the ring and the expectations that come with it, that Adrien finally look at her, brought back to here and now. Marinette reassures Adrien he doesn't need to be like his father. Adrien can just be himself, without having to live up to any expectations placed upon him.

Marinette then proceeds in slips the ring on his finger. Adrien is free and in control of who he wants to be, of what he wants to do, no matter his background. The past doesn't matter anymore. He can just focus on what is ahead of him.

In this short shot reverse shot, we see a bit of Marinette's head in Adrien's shot, however in Marinette's reverse shot, she is framed alone.

This bit has of a shift in the discussion. Marinette made contact with Adrien, entering his "bubble". She has established a connection in their discussion. Her words are reaching him and moving him.

Adrien : You always find the right words, Marinette. When I'm with you, I feel so... free!

And now they are in synch. Both say "I love you" to the other at the same time, which make them laugh. And Adrien wraps Marinette's hand as if he never wants to let her go. As if he will protect and cherish her with all his might. She makes him that happy.

As the white butterflies illustrate, there is no negative emotions around. Only pure hapiness. Only love. And they are kissing where Émilie's statue used to be.

Émilie's message in Collusion : Adrien shouldn't have to suffer the consequences of our mistakes. Our little prince has the right to create his own vision of happiness.

In other words, Monarch did not win. Émilie won. Gabriel has used the Wish, yes, but his wish was different than the one he wanted to make for 5 seasons. And it is not unusual for Gabriel to do everything in his power to grant any of Émilie's wishes. And her final wishes were : for Gabriel to let go of his madness, to not bring her back, and for Adrien to be happy.

And the ghost of Émilie can now rest in peace and stop haunting these walls. And Adrien can fully love Marinette the way he wants without any obstacle in the way anymore.

And all points to the Power of Love has ultimately won. Even the most important characters in those scene all have a link related to love.

Adrien was created by love. Ms Bustier promotes love as one of her teachings and she was akumatized twice out of that very emotion (spread love, protect the children's future). And she got elected as Mayor. Alec who interviews Ms Bustier is also another character who is now full of love and care. And Marinette fought for love. Even the Agreste Mansion Garden is associated to love. Gabriel and Émilie got a scene there during Evolution. Marinette and Adrien got a romantic date there as well. Heck, this is even where Nathalie shares she was ready to help Gabriel out of love.

Love may falter or even fades away for a time, but right now, in Adrien's scenes, love is fully blooming.

Back to the scene, as Marinette and Adrien kiss, the camera zoom out at the shot crossfades, giving the impression their kiss is everlasting. And ultimately fades to white...

... before the white suddenly cut to Nadja Chamack's news report where she interviews Professor Du Bocquale about the international event that had happened.

Using both the news reporter and the scientific, we transitioned to Marinette's Guardian of the Miraculous pov. The sentimentality and dream life is over, it is time to get back to the facts and reality. The Happy Ever After is not quite accomplish yet.

And that will be developped in second eventual part because I am reaching the limit of images allowed in one single Tumblr post ^^;

Anyway, thank you for reading this far and stay tuned!

[spoofymcgee]

Rating Various Companion Exits in Terms of How Objectively Sad They Are

because if we do my personal opinions it'll just be donna donna donna bill rose jack everyone else

Least: Martha

i don't think it's an unpopular opinion that martha's exit was the least sad. like, she retires to take care of her mental health and for her family's sake, gets her doctorate, continues being an absolute badass who is also in touch with her emotions and super nice. she finds a partner who sees her for how incredible she really is and appreciates her.

personally i do believe that she and the doctor clear the air at some point–though i don't think martha holds anything against him still–and she'll just call up the TARDIS when she's having a bad day and one of various doctors will come do a girls night with her and paint their nails and talk about the wild shit they've each been up to lately.

(i don't think martha ever stops being in love with the doctor a little bit. but it's not a tragic kind of love–it's a comfortable one, the kind of love you can have once you understand that love will never be perfectly symmetrical and it can be nice without being reciprocated. in the same way that the doctor loves their companions in a way that they can never fully return for how vast and unending and universe-ending it is, martha can love the doctor in a small and quiet and steady way that never fully goes away even when she does hate them.)

(and if you keep to canon with mickey as her husband you get some fun angst about that! okay, martha digression over.)

Second-Least: Rose

look. i know this is an unpopular opinion. i know the doctor is haunted by rose leaving and the narrative is haunted by rose leaving and everyone and their grandma is haunted by rose leaving.

but. girl got sucked into a parallel universe. she got to say goodbye to the doctor, even if he had a stick high enough up his ass that it kept him from saying he loved her. she moves to a different world to retire in a mansion with her mom and her dream guy and has a baby and spends the rest of her life being awesome and cool and saving the world.

yes it is sad that she left. but her method of leaving itself is not sad. she gets a happy ending and the doctor knows about it and no one dies! so i think maybe that's my hot take. first of a few.

Third-Least: Clara

idk how unpopular this is but i'm not entirely certain it's correct because.

look. clara does technically die. the doctor watches her die and spends four billion years smashing diamonds with his fists to save her. as pissed i am that those two episodes basically made her retroactively superfluous before getting rid of her, i can admit that that's a pretty epically tragic way to go out.

but the thing is, she spends the rest of time running around the galaxy with me in a TARDIS, and the doctor only forgets her for, like, seventy years and then he's fine with it again.

so her exit is sad but it's undercut by the fact that she gets at least a bittersweet ending and also that she should have left a season before she did and also the episode after she dies establishes that the doctor hasn't needed her for a while.

so worse than martha and rose who have a happy end and don't die, but better than everyone else.

Third-Most: Amy and Rory

this is why i wasn't sure where to put clara, and i'm sure this is not a popular opinion but. i don't think amy and rory's exit was so sad.

like, i can acknowledge that the course their story was going to take was amy having to choose rory over the doctor. i get that now. i understand that.

and their exit is sad! it is! it is mathematically engineered to be sad. but. and i don't want to go cinema sins about this. is there a really the doctor couldn't have picked them up and brought them home a year later? like, the year is the problem, yes?

and maybe if i didn't have spoilers and also had no media literally or ability to understand foreshadowing i might have been more affected by the real death right after the fake-out death, and the doctor running across the bridge to the book is a nice scene and the bit with river is excellent but.

i just think it's missing something. i think it feels like it's designed to put them in an impenetrable plot prison in a way that was totally unnecessary because they want to leave anyway. it feels like it wants me to be sad–and then move on right away.

Second-Most: Bill

first off! bill dies! because if you really think about it. nearly none of the nuwho companions do? and bill technically becomes space oil yes but

a) the entire downslope of world enough and time and the doctor falls is so fucking sad. she dies and she wakes back up and she has to live in a body that is clunky and awkward and painful and doesn't fully feel like hers and is slowly failing her and that everyone treats as not having a chance despite the fact that its doing its best. and eventually even that gets taken away from her and she is being slowly deconstructed, everything that makes her who she is sawed off piece by piece until she can't even get angry because it's too dangerous, and everyone is scared of her, and she is clinging to the edge of herself because the only thing worse than being a walking rotting weapon is hurting her friends.

b) the doctor only like, 50% knows that she survives as space oil. the glass people don't fully know, so he might not trust them and from his perspective she's dead and he got her killed.

c) no other companion's death affects the doctor's next regeneration so deeply. thirteen throws herself between people and guns, she drops the monologues and the arrogance because her overconfidence is the reason why bill died. what the fuck is that. insane.

anyway bill is so high up and it's been weeks since i watched world enough and time and i'm not over it. bill potts my beloved you made me so happy and then crushed my heart to bits.

Most: Donna

i mean this is just canon. what can i say here that has not already been said.

the doctor has to take donna in his arms, donna who is finally seeing how brilliant she is, who saved his life and her life and the universe, who is brilliant and ruthless and burning.

her takes her in his arms and he kills her while she's begging him not to, begging him to let her go because she'd rather die as herself than die knowing that (from her perspective) the shallows cruel, self-hating voice in her head will replace her and talk like her and look like her only she'll be dead and that will be all that's left.

donna knows who and what she is without the doctor, without her memories, and it is her worst nightmare. and the doctor sends her back to that because he can't bear to lose her, because she is donna even if she doesn't show it, because he thinks that she will figure out how to do so again–and it's so easy for him to make excuses for the fact that he cannot stand by and let her die in his arms when he can do something about it.

god.

[saptaincwan]

Top 5 Captain Swan scenes? <3

YAYYY they honestly have SO many great scenes and my personal ranking changes a bunch depending on mood so here goes, in no particular order except for #1!

(under cut bc it got long lolll)

tl;dr

underworld goodbye

liam's ring

5x21 reunion

tallahassee bandaging scene

"im going to choose to see the best in you"

,, and i'll sneak in. proposal #2

so without further ado,

i wrote something long and insane about this but tumblr deleted it and i couldnt ctrl+z it back this is so sad. lemme try again

this felt like a climax of sorts in not only their relationship, but their character arcs. jen and colin's absolutely stellar acting here only supported that.

i specially think this scene is so poignant because of the whole arc leading to this moment. further by this episode's theme. and most importantly because of the scene directly before this one: "you're holding on too tight-- let go"

emma is finally able to let go, and to keep accepting others' love in her life. she loves killian too much not to. in turn the same goes for killian: he loves emma too much not to move on to a better place. this is peak "they made each other better" exemplified.

the juxtaposition of them desperately holding on to each other just one last time. finally getting to say goodbye. and of, at the same time, saying goodbye forever. peak romantic cinema!!

LIAM'S RING!!! see i love this scene i love camelot cs the aesthetics are peak.

but i love this because it's one of the few scenes in which they get to say i love you in a more "relaxed" way. as in. they're not about to die in the next 2 secs LOL. and emma looks just. so HAPPY here. definitely one her biggest, most sincere smiles in the show i think

this coupled with killian sharing a bit of his past, and in a way bringing "together" his love for liam with his love for emma. aaaAAAA

also emma's disappointed face at him not proposing honestly what's NOT to love

WHAT CAN I SAY. that hasn't already been said omg

i think this is a beautiful resolution to cs's s5 romantic arc. i talked a bit about this earlier today but-- after everything was said and done. after they loved each other SO much. fate itself saw that. they saw that, they saw how they were separated!!

they saw how they did everything to be together and then how they loved each other enough to let go! and so the rules of force and nature and life itself bent themselves backwards to let them be.

not because they were meant to. but because they weren't!! but the world and each other were so much better with them by each others' side that it let them have this.

how many romances can i say that about LIKE cs is in a whole different league of their own and it drives me insane

i like this bc after acquiring media literacy this is the moment i think. in which it becomes obvious cs will be canon 😭

but mainly ALSOOOO bc i believe this to be the first moment in which emma really connected with killian. a follow up of them hiking the beanstalk!

bc you see, going up, he understood her. he got under her skin, and that can get one uneasy enough. but here? he is just like her. it casts his understanding of her into a new light! he knows that not only has she suffered loss, but saw his own mirrored in her.

i think this is the scene that sets up the rest of the ep, and most importantly, emma's betrayal at the end. he sees her. and she knows that. and she sees him! and he knows it too!

how far can things go, if she allows it? so it ends: she doesn't. and this!! ^^^ this is why!

WE DON'T TALK ENOUGH ABOUT THIS SCENE I THINKKKK because once they're together fr, i think this is one of the first few larger hurdles they face as a couple.

killian is still majorly processing his shame in regards to his past and it really comes to smack him in person. and they hadn't dealt with that! (onscreen at least)

and it's one thing knowing someone trusts you but it's another to put that in a real situation which requires that trust. and emma gives it so freely. they are talking about this.and we get to see that!

this is such a normal issue that i think takes place eventually for Every couple ever. it goes a bit beyond trust even. it's about knowing they can rely on each other when things get tough.

i really strongly think love is about, and is, a choice. there are rough patches and there are issues, minor and major, but ultimately you made the choice to be there for this person and support them, and in turn, you have the absolute reassurance they'll do the same for you. i've always known this to be a sure thing for cs but i just really like getting to see a scene directly addressing that. i love that we got it

i sneaked this scene so no major thoughts but i think we all love this ep and this scene and why. personal fav s6 ep actually

[iveneverbeenmorestressedinmylife]

please elaborate on where you would have taken hunter's arc!! i am so frustrated that they gave him no time to grieve and didn't even let him confront belos in the end

Godd, you and i both anon, you and i both. Where do i even start.

Aaahh first of all obligatory disclaimer: this is all hypothetical talk and I don't hold anything against the toh crew they did their best with what little wiggle room disney gave them. Well ok theres actually like one or two things i hold against them but we will get to that.

So. Hunter. Its honestly so frustrating how little he does and how little he learns about himself after like. Labyrinth runners? Like we and king see the golden guard graveyard. He doesn't. We see the Caleb statue. He doesn't. We never learn anything more about Darius' mentor and besides like a nudge and a wink the fact that Gus knows that he is a grimwalker simply doesn't get brought up. Most of these are obviously things that the crew would looove to elaborate on but they weren't allowed to which. Tragic. Disney robbed us blind.

But what DOES Hunter know?? Well he knows a few things and they are all horrifying! Caleb, Phillip, Evelyn, witch hunters yada yada yada. Is he ever given any screen time to grieve or scream or cry? Nope!

Aaauughh in my humble and 100 percent biased opinion...the hunter episodes that i Truly Unabashedly Loved with all my heart and soul and i have rewatched like a bazillion times since then are 1. Kings tide, 2. Hunting palismen, 3. Eclipse lake and 4. Hollow mind. What do these episodes have in common? Well Hunter acts like a little bitch in them. He is determined to win, he is capable, he is unhinged. Honestly i was very casual about toh before hunting palismen aired. Like i genuinely didn't care all that much before Hunter showed up 😭😭 but the MOMENT the show dangled a little shiny fucked up bitchboy before my eyes i was a goner. Well past the point of no return and with no desire to return to the way things were.

At the end of the day my stance on Hunter's characterisation throughout the show is that i wanted him to be more fucked up... I wanted him to cling desperately to the ideas Belos beat into his head, i wanted his desperation to be palpable and intoxicating.!!! That happened in the eclipse lake episode and ive simply never gotten over it!! Suuuuuch a good episode. Also i know that getting more friends is definitely better for him in the long run but i wanted him to be like a little feral cat,,, i wanted him to have more weird rivalry-fueled misadventures with luz before getting acquainted with the hex squad and when he did meet the rest of the kids i wanted him to be more mistrustful... God i wanted luz to keep making him fail on his missions resulting in punishment and abuse by Belos. I wanted him to misdirect all the blame onto her since he obviously can't blame his beloved uncle now can he. I wanted him to be mad!!! I wanted him to start biting!!

But whatever thats again a lack of screentime. We barely got to see hunter in his gg era which was a crime, i loved his gg era. At the end of the day maybe im simply asking for too much. Hollow mind happens (amazing episode 10/10). He calls invading belos memories "sacrilege" which has simply never left my mind. The moment the memories he sees don't allign with the propaganda belos has forced into him, his first instinct is to angrily call himself an idiot because obviously being wrong about mindscapes would make more sense than his emperor and uncle lying to him, right???

The first moment he dares to so much as imply that he might be doubting Belos integrity his worst fear becomes reality.

Now at this point i would be SO happy if he begged a little for forgiveness. But whatever its an ok point for him to leave. It makes sense, his only family threatened his life. He runs away into the woods while having a panic attack. Poetic cinema, ten out of ten no notes.

Honestly when hollow mind aired i was SO sure that flapjack would lead him to the bat queen. It makes sense doesn't it? Damaged palismen, damaged grimwalker. Made of the same materials, breathing artificial life into their magical bodies. I was so so so sure. Buuut he went to hexside intead. Works for me i suppose. Labyrinth runners is one of those hunter episodes that just didn't really click for me as much as i wish they would. But it was great nonetheless! He got to kick some ass which was lovely and also graye got to psychologically torture him which was excellent. And then the season finale happens and what was his role again? Oh literally nothing?? Ok. Whatever. Then thanks to them, he gets retraumatised again and then in for the future he is allowed to be grumpy and grieve for a whole five (5) minutes before everyone takes it personally which. Lmao. And then in the finale he just. doesn't do anything.

Have you ever watched any of the smurfs movies? The smurfs and the lost village perhaps but honestly most of them could work for the point im trying to make. Have you seen Smurfettes arc? Isn't it GOOD? Doesn't it feel EXHILARATING when she gets the chance to stand up against the man who created her for a Specific Purpose, proving him wrong and showing off how much control she has over her own life in the process? Well Hunter never got any of that sadly. One day he learnt that he is literally a Clone instead of a Real Witch and he just never really reacts to that horrifying revelation kskskska. And he doesn't play a role at all on the fall of his uncle, the man who has literally killed and rebirthed him for CENTURIES again and again and again. He doesn't even get to vengefully step on his gooey corpse after luz is done with him kskskssm. Im so fucking mad. :D

Now im kinda getting into unpopular opinion territory again but i was so scared this would happen when the blushing between him and willow first started rearing its uninteresting head...i immediately went oh no. They are gonna give me a silly romance plot instead of some actual emotional impact / reaction on the fact that his life literally fell apart overnight. The thing is i really really don't like the way they handled huntllow. Sorry not sorry but i was so desperate for any crumbs of earned character development that the stupid ''will they won't they'' thin they gave me felt like mockery. Hunter got zero time to adjust to his new reality but he got a romance that i really really didnt want him to get. And the thing is ive read fics and seen fanart about them and its cute! Ive actually enjoyed fancontent about them!! But in the actual show? The timing feels so wrong skskks. Giving hunter a love interest feels like such a weird priority considering the fact that he just learnt that he is a reanimated corpse created by the man he called family to be used as a weapon. Im not trying to rain on anyone's parade but i really really wish things could have played out differently.

God another thing that has been driving me insane!! They play up this "half witches" thing with hunter and willow as a point of camaraderie and it makes sense...i was actually looking forward to any possible interactions between them before asias first aired because of that parallel. But well. Theres like a huge difference between them. Willow grew up thinking she was weak only to find out that oh she was super strong and a prodigy all along actually! Which good for her! But Hunter grew up feeling weak and useless, getting abused by the man who made him and then he just found out that surprise! Actually you are not even half of a witch. Like. I can't be the only one who thinks thats tragic, right???? Right???? If i was hunter and willow tried to play the ''i understand how you feel' card on me i would get so mad, no offense. But of course this is toh and as much a s i love it (which is a whole lot i assure you) the characters aren't allowed to be maladjusted, not even a little bit nooo. Everyone has to act like they have dozens of hours of therapy under their belt which i don't mind on characters like luz or willow or gus who have lead relatively normal lives but really fucking annoys me when applied on Hunter who's spent his entire life getting physically and emotionally abused out of his mind, working himself to death and interacting only with his genocidal maniac of an uncle who is somehow both neglectful and obsessed with him at the same time. Like thats the one (1) thing i blame the toh crew for. They kinda give me the impression that even if they had more screen time they wouldn't allow hunter to explode the way he deserved.

My other complaint and i swear I'm almost done is the fact that the moment they took his gg status away from him they went really out of their way to make him out to be some sort of loser?? Like people making fun of him left and right or him just acting really silly all the time and stuff like that...and sure some of it comes off as endearing I won't deny that but. Idk. I never do handle it well when people don't seem to respect my favourite characters. It makes me sad for reasons i can barely explain but hunter was raised as a soldier and as a powerless boy who was constantly fighting off assassination attempts and enemies a lot older than him. God knows he had to fight hard for any semblance of respect or safety but the moment he leaves the emperors coven they immediately rob him of that. Idk it doesn't seat well with me. Like its so upsetting??? He already has so little left,,,giving him space to become his own person shouldnt come at the cost of the little power he was ever allowed to have. Idk. But yeah i dont like the way they turned him into some sort of loserboy towards the end in an attempt to make him more endearing withouth having to actually put him through the painful process of building a new identity for himself. Its just rubbing me the wrong way.

Ok and to actually answer your question: what would i actually want hunters role in the finale to be? Well. In a perfect world he would be allowed to kill Belos himself. But thats kinda unrealistic i suppose considering the fact that at the end of the day luz is the protagonist of the show and in shows like these the protagonists tend to get the final fight. Like im not going to lie, i liked the finale well enough. Out of all the scenarios they could have gone with, a king-eda-luz team up was honestly one of the best things they could do. This show started with them and it ended with them and that was beautifull! Makes sense! But skskksks throwing hunter on the sidelines with camilla, amity, willow and gus feels so funny to me. Like i mean no disrespect to any of the other characters but the stakes for hunter are so ridiculously personal????? Didnt he deserve to have one (1) moment. One scene where he gets anything resembling a proper ending for his character arc??? But noooooo what hunter gets is a schoolyard crush and zero closure. Im so mad on his behalf, he deserved so much better.

[notsocheezy]

Brain Curd #132

Brain Curds are lightly edited flash fiction - practically first drafts - posted daily (haven't missed one yet!) and sometimes written with the express intention of being terrible… but, you know, in an endearing way. Please like and reblog if you enjoy - the notes keep me going!

The following material is classified - unless you've read the rest of Government Man here on Tumblr! Also, this is a continuation of yesterday's episode, so read that first.

Government Man checked his second holster - the one under his jacket - and felt the calming cool metal of the grip. His captors had been sloppy. But it was too soon to reveal himself now. He needed information, and he could only hope Counter Spy and his accomplice would continue talking.

“So…” Counter Spy began. “Having any fun times lately?”

“Yes, indeed.” The androgynous one pushed up their glasses. “I went to see the new Pixar movie last night.”

“Is not for kids?”

“Pixar makes fine cinema, sir. Have you ever seen Wall-E?”

“Not.”

“It’s a masterpiece. It’s in The Criterion Collection.”

“Thank you, Omega-Delta. I will remember this that you suggest.”

This was not the intel Government Man had hoped for. But he did make a mental note to sit down and watch Wall-E whenever he next took ‘time off’.

The gurgling sound from the tube stopped, and Omega-Delta pressed a button on their control panel. A defibrillator charged up and released, and the Government Man in the tube spasmed to life. He held his head, groggy, disoriented, and listless. With the push of another button, a robot arm lifted the glass and Beta stepped out.

“The agent is covered in slime. I am hating slime! Why did we choose this gross as our substrate?”

“Bromothymol Gel is very rich in carbon, hydrogen, oxygen, nitrogen, and phosphorous compounds. The building blocks of life.”

“The question was being rhetorically, Omega. I do not have care for this. Wash him and put him in a suit.”

Counter Spy went back out the door he entered through, and Omega-Delta took Beta over to an emergency shower in the corner. Government Man Alpha took out his hidden pistol and snuck out to follow his nemesis.

He quietly shut the door behind him and looked around for cover. There was a vending machine, so he hopped behind that. But as he surveyed his surroundings, he realized he recognized that vending machine, and the stains on the drop ceiling, too. This was CIA Headquarters. He glanced back at the door he’d exited. It was a ‘supply closet’ he’d passed by every day for as long as he could remember. He’d never known for even a moment that such things happened right under his nose.

Footsteps approached. GM squeezed himself as deeply into the corner as he could. He’d be safe so long as nobody wanted a snack. Unfortunately, somebody wanted a snack.

Boss Man stepped up to the machine, stuck out his tongue, and titled his head, looking at each item on the shelves.

“Hmmm…” He muttered to himself. “Do I want left Twix… or right Twix… or do I want pretzels…”

It didn’t seem like he’d noticed Government Man crammed into the corner, who stayed perfectly still in hopes that he might not be seen.

Boss Man began ventriloquizing the junk food with a high falsetto. “I’m Twix, and I’m a tasty little snack! I have chocolate and caramel and a cookie! I will make your tastebuds sooooo happy!”

The pretzels had a deeper voice. “I’m pretzels. I wanna get dipped in mustard! Chocolate will give you a sugar rush and make you fat.”

“Pretzels don’t taste like anything but salt and airplane seat cushions!”

“You take that back, you foul-tempered cocoa cretin! I oughtta -”

Boss Man turned and rolled up his sleeves, but stopped in his tracks when he saw Government Man staring at him with the expression of a child who had just witnessed an argument between parents.

“Um… Government Man. Good afternoon…” He awkwardly cleared his throat. “Uh… which snack should I buy from the vending machine?”

Government Man could have stood up at this point, but remained still. “I think the candy bar made a better case for itself.”

Boss Man nodded. “Yes, yes, I agree.” He punched the number in and watched as the machine slowly dropped it down, where he retrieved it from the door at the bottom. He unwrapped it and took an uncomfortable bite. “Government Man?”

“Yes?”

“What you just saw is classified. Tell no one.” He walked away.

~

Government Woman crossed her arms at Alpha.

“Oh, right, I was supposed to skip over that part. Anyway, after that I went to Postal Fred’s house. I needed someone who had experience moving cargo.”

“Wait…” Government Woman gasped. “You stole the government property!”

“These clones are me! They should not belong to anyone! The only trouble was that I did not know they were outfitted with tracking devices.”

“Every third item… that is what Boss Man said.”

“I do not have a tracking device, so it is possible that both Beta and Epsilon do. Do you have any idea where they might be?”

“I have no idea -”

Government Woman was interrupted by a buzz from her watch.

“It’s a message from the impostor! Or, uh, ‘Beta’. He says he is in the hospital with Government Boy.”

“Who is Government Boy?”

“Oh, I guess you do not know him. He’s new.”

“Hmmm.”

“Oh my goodness! He was shot!”

Alpha glanced back down at the shattered tube. “I think we have our answer. Government Woman, I must ask that you act as my eyes and ears on the inside. But before you go, I must ask…” He scratched the back of your head. “I only saw myself in any of these cloning tanks, but… do you remember?”

“Remember what?”

“Do you remember anything before my birthday party? Do you remember a life outside of the CIA? Do you remember being a child, being free, having a family?”

GW looked at the floor. “That is classified.”

“I know that, Government Woman, I know. And I’ll take you at your word for it but please, please, tell me, do you remember?”

“I… I don’t know.”

GM nodded. “Alright.”

[bdzonthareel]

Back to Black

Amy Winehouse’s life was the subject of much conversation, she was known just as much for her erratic behavior as she was for her legendary music career. And her story is one that absolutely has to be seen to believe. So let’s talk about Back to Black.

To keep it short, it’s about Amy’s meteoric rise to fame.

Back to Black is weird, it’s as tumultuous as her career and that’s saying something.

This is an extraordinarily shot film, I’m not a huge fan of the shaky cam, it helped the audience get an understanding of a drunken episode. It’s  just a beautifully shot film, locations like Camden Town give a classy urban vibe, and this from the brilliant camerawork of Polly Morgan, and the directing skills of Sam Taylor-Johnson.

I am also in love with the costuming as well. The film’s star, Marisa Abela was killing it in these outfits and she must have studied Amy’s style closely  in order to look the way she did with her iconic attire.

Sound direction helped the audience feel like we were in the pubs that she would perform before signing to Island records, you can feel her stumble her way home after a horrific argument, and it made for an immersive experience. 

The score felt like it would have felt right at home in one of Amy’s songs, soulful yet melancholy and this made the performances really sink in

The song choices in the background were liberally peppered throughout the film, it was great to experience some of Amy’s inspirations.

Standout performances from the likes of Eddie Marsen as Mitch Winehouse, which I’m certain was not a coincidence (more on that later), Jack O’Connell as Amy’s star crossed lover Blake Civil gave a muted performance but you knew he was there. Marisa Abela was a brilliant casting choice for the role of Amy Winehouse, she was a hell raiser and a vulnerable soul when the performance called for it. 

But this is where my praise ends, while the film’s first act felt like a solid piece of cinema, the rest felt like generic award bait. 

The script was a hodgepodge of dramatic movie tropes, which kinda felt like disrespect to the memory of Amy Winehouse. While Amy and Blake had a drug fueled rocky romance, the delivery felt disingenuous. 

Abela’s voice is brilliant, but she was no Amy Winehouse; it had part of me wishing that they had just used Amy’s recording instead. It sadly broke the immersion for me.

And then there’s the involvement of Mitch Winehouse (the real one), the manipulation of his daughter’s career is well known, and it seems like he did everything possible to make the film version of him look like a saint. 

And one of the most disrespectful parts had to do with the song “Valerie”, which was a cover of indie punk group, The Zutons. The film stated that Amy wrote the song, and it broke my heart to hear that. But go check out The Zutons, they're awesome!

Amy Winehouse was an icon, an artist, tortured soul and a once in a lifetime talent, she left us far too soon, and I appreciate what this film did well, but I can’t forgive its transgressions.

Mitch Winehouse being included in the production most likely had something to do with it, but that’s show biz. Go watch the documentary, Amy Winehouse: Back to Black instead.

I give Back to Black a 3 out of 5.

[wen-kexing-apologist]

Another excellent post by @waitmyturtles and despite the fact I keep swearing to myself to stop writing analyses, theme 2 in the post above has my wheels turning again because it’s making me think of Gaipa and his mother. Because whenever Gaipa is home with his Mom, he is only ever on the couch. And scenes with his mother in his home always include him laying on the couch with his head on a pillow in his mother’s lap.

The first time we see it, he’s sitting on the couch asking his mother about her regrets. Does she have any regrets? Does she regret that he’s gay? These are honest questions that require an honest answer, and she gives it. It’s an act of love on both of their parts to have a child ask such questions and to have a parent answer them. The second time we see Gaipa like this is in the voice over sequence at the end of Episode 4, where the Father is talking about life having highs and lows, that there is no life that is forever perfect. And I don’t remember the exact wording but I know that the point in the speech where we see him laying on his mother’s lap is in a positive moment of the speech.

Now, we haven’t had a moment, yet, of Heart and Li Ming laying in each other’s lap on the couch, but the early parts of their friendship are couch heavy. When Heart apologizes for lying about the liquor, him and Li Ming are sitting on the couch, but crucially they are sitting in opposite directions to begin with. Heart is facing the TV and Li Ming is facing the rest of the house. After his apology, Li Ming joins him on the couch, indicating forgiveness and bringing them together. The second time is when Li Ming suggests he and Heart catch a movie in the cinema next time, and Heart admits that his mother hasn’t let him leave the house in three years. It’s also when Heart thanks Li Ming for being his ears. They are progressing in their relationship, and Heart is being completely vulnerable in this moment and it brings him closer to Li Ming. Heart has taken Li Ming to be family after this moment, and they can progress to the next visually relevant location, the stairway. The stairway is far more significant for Heart and Li Ming specifically than the couch is because of the way they are always doing something or discussing something that has made them feel trapped in their lives while sitting against literal bars. But that’s for another day.

But when do we see them on a couch again? When Li Ming brings Heart to his home for New Years, and they kiss. Once again progressing their relationship from friends to something more. And that’s the same couch that Jim and Wen had just been on after Jim answered some of his questions about the past and started to move on from it.

I don’t remember which post it was that I wrote where I mentioned this before but I know I’ve previously discussed community, specifically around Heart and Li Ming. The moment Heart thanked Li Ming for being his ears, when they’re pressed up against each other swapping notes back and forth, when Li Ming starts learning sign language, he becomes Heart’s community. It’s why blue lighting overpowers every other color whenever he’s in Heart’s home. He’s completely consumed in Heart’s world because Heart has no one else…until Li Ming brings him to the church. But Heart is not a part of Li Ming’s community until much later. In the beginning, Heart is an escape from Li Ming’s life. And I interpret it that way because after the initial meeting with Heart’s family where Li Ming agrees to work off the debt, he never mentions Heart to anyone, only that he has to go to work, or that he’s going to “the officers house tonight and doesn’t want to be late”. Heart doesn’t become a part of Li Ming’s community until he’s buying two bubble tea in front of Jim, until he introduced Heart to Wen in episode 5, until Jim is giving a talk on boundaries with Heart in his home not Heart’s, and…until they are celebrating the New Year together while sitting on Li Ming’s couch.

And to end this with a wenjim moment (because I feel bad about how much I focus on Heart and Li Ming in this show) hands-down my favorite moment of the couch scene between Wen and Jim is that first instance where Jim feels compelled to run his fingers through Wen’s hair and stops himself. That’s a comfortable, familiar, action. It’s Jim reaching out to physically connect himself to Wen, because they aren’t physically touching in the beginning, Wen’s head is propped up with a pillow. And at first he stops himself, he doesn’t allow himself to have it. But he immediately changes his mind, and like five seconds later he’s giving up, he’s allowing himself to touch Wen’s head, to stroke his hair, to be familiar with him. And that is such a great indication to me after Jim is the first to take Wen’s hand on the beach of Jim finally allowing himself to have a home again.

The hamster wheel of my brain can’t stop spinning, and I have a bit more meta that I need to chew on for Moonlight Chicken episode 6 (part 1 is here and part 2 is here, and I stg that I need to move awn from this episode at some point – Aof, this is all your fault, I’m getting Bad Buddy-ed again). And whoops, I also have a tad bit of meta for episode 5, too that I forgot to add in that review (here), so here we go – happy Saturday, fam, hope you’re brunching away!

(Ooooh, and also, I updated my MC Big Themes list for eps. 5 and 6. As always, if you have suggestions for great posts for me to list, please send them, and I’ll add them!) 

1) Episode 5: I totally forgot to mention in my first review that Aof hasn’t forgotten the big macroeconomic conversation about the impact of the food court on Pattaya. Namely, that business meeting that Wen was in, where the discussion of the purchase of the historic market buildings was happening. When that boss said, “This is Thailand. Big fish always eat small fish.”

I honestly think we see this theme returning in episode 6 – when Alan refuses the loan to Jim. At that moment in time, Alan has resources, he has power. And he admits to Jim: I can’t separate work from personal matters, I can’t administer the loan to you. (Hmph, Mr. Professional, okay.)

Call this an extrapolation, but I wonder if Aof is making a point here. In the end, these big economics are about greed and resource hoarding. Is the food court in Pattaya about a mathematical calculation in “helping” or “investing” back into Pattaya? Or is it about making money at the hands of the private companies and government figures who are allowing the food court to be built?

Is the loan refusal that Alan makes to Jim about protecting Alan’s bank or the bank’s customers? Or is it about Alan’s greed and jealousy towards Jim in wanting Wen back? (I think this is gently reflective of how Alan commodifies Wen in episode 5, when he says to Jim, and I’m paraphrasing, “just return what was taken from me.” Alan is a banker – he’s a resources guy, and thinks in resource terms, even about his love life). 

Love, in these instances – a “love” for Pattaya, Alan’s “love” for Wen – is being commodified for rewards and greed. 

2) Episode 6: I mentioned this scene in my last two (!! JFC, two) posts about episode 6, so I’m repeating myself, but I really, really loved the scene where Wen was falling asleep on Jim’s lap (yay, it got gif-ed!). For me, there was so, so much in that scene.

I keep coming back to Wen’s line: “Do you take this place as your home?” I wrote before that that line obviously refers to the conversation that opened the episode, about love-as-home, and I also meditated that I think that line could also be a reference to Pattaya itself.

But I think also why this scene is sticking with me is because of the meaning of falling asleep on a lap, in a room like Jim’s living room.

I think it’s just such a genius stroke of Aof to situate Jim’s living arrangement as an old-school house that happens to be a rental. On the one hand, the rental aspect gives the house a temporary nature in Jim’s life – it could disappear at any time. On the other hand, the old-school design and layout gives the house such a rooting in the past – as if the past is still permanent in Jim’s mind and world.

I’m going to take a guess here, but I think there’s deeper meaning to Wen falling asleep on Jim’s lap as they’re situated in Jim’s old-school living room. Those long, flat, wooden-frame couches with the flat cushions. If you grew up in SE Asia, or visited like I did as a kid – you so know those couches. With your uncles sitting on them, with their legs crossed, ankles resting on the opposite knee. Or your uncles and aunties sitting with one leg tucked under them, the other leg with the knee up and foot perched on the couch. Just chilling, talking. 

When my fam would visit when I was a kid, and we’d go visiting to all the houses, as soon as we landed on those couches, it was like time slowed down. Our extended family got comfortable with us visiting Americans – and we were all as one again, one big family, chilling, eating fruit, laughing, catching up. 

So I’m vibing that there’s an old-school comfort to that room that, I wonder, I think, that scene is referencing. If we were lucky enough to have kind parents as kids, we can remember falling asleep on our parents’ laps – an easy occurrence to conjure on those old-school couches, for sure.

I think Jim and Wen are evoking “home” in that scene on so many levels. On the love level – when you love someone, you’re home, and you are that person’s home. On the temporal level, and on the geographical level.

Wen asks Jim – “do you take this place as your home?” This rental? This living room? This town? This person?

And Jim, in that scene – at first, he pulls back. (Remember Nozue pulling back from Togawa in Old Fashion Cupcake as Togawa sobs?)

Then Jim strokes Wen’s hair. He eases up, he settles in. That’s what you do on those couches – you ease up and chill out. Because, even in a temporary place, you can find home in a living room like that. Because you grew up with love in a living room like that. 

(SHEESH. AOF!!! DUDE! WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME.)

[alwayslovingharry]

With You All The Time

A/N: Hi, yes I'm aware that I've disappeared again for another month, but I've had some family problems, I've started university and I've been very distracted from writing, although I have been reading and reblogging stuff on Tumblr.

But the other day I went to see DWD and I loved it. The movie is beautiful and it's not as bad as the reviews make it out to be, Florence was perfect and Harry was great. Before I saw it, I had my own theories about what would happen and… I was a little bit wrong. Based on my theories and the movie I've spent this afternoon writing a… DWD fix-fic? I don't know if anyone will like it but I thought it might appeal to someone looking for a more romantic ending, although I'm also leaving it very open in this story (maybe a part 2? depends on how you treat it…).

About my other stories? Even I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm trying to balance my day to day life a bit at the moment and I don't have a definite writing schedule. I let things flow, so I'd rather not make any promises…

Now I hope you like it and… I don't know if you'll be interested in a second part or something. As always, you are free to comment, like and reblog.

PAIRING: Jack Chambers (Harry Styles) x Alice Warren (Florence Pugh)

WORD COUNT: 1.4k

WARNING: Obviously, spoilers for Don't Worry Darling, if you haven't seen the movie and don't want any spoilers please don't continue, or take the consequences of doing it…there may also be a little angst and a little swearing, but nothing out of the ordinary.

SUMMARY: Hearing Jack humming the song that was in her head has made Alice remember everything…

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"AHH..." you fall to the ground, your head spinning as all the memories come flooding back as you hear Jack humming.

You and Jack walking out of the cinema, walking holding each other down that alleyway to the parking where you had parked your car. You remember the prick in your arm, the thud against the ground as you fall, the screams of Jack and the other men, their hands on your body...the silence in the dark. 

"Alice?"

"No!" you scream "Don't!"

Chills run through your body and tears run down your cheeks. You hear Jack's hurried footsteps coming from the hall, your head spins and feels like it's going to explode. You can't help but groan in pain.

"It's okay. Alice, you're having another episode. Just take a deep breath." he keeps talking to you, his voice getting closer and closer. "It's okay. Just breathe, Alice."

You remember how they changed your clothes and laid you down on a bed, how they strapped you to it and put you on all those IVs and monitors. And finally the device they put on your eyes, how uncomfortable it was until...you saw Jack again but on a train to Boston in the 50s. 

"That's good. Just breathe" he says as he sees your breathing relaxing "That's good."

You want to scream, hit something, cry...and seeing Jack in front of you doesn't help calm you down when you finally turn to see him. 

"What did you do?" his face completely changes expression, turning serious and confirming to you that he knows what's going on.

You stare at each other for a few seconds, before he tries to approach you. You stand up quickly and turn around the kitchen island to avoid him. 

"Alice, please, just stay calm." you rest your hands on the fridge, feeling dizzy and your head can't help but try to connect everything that has happened to you and what you've seen. "It's going to be okay, I can explain."

"What the fuck is going on?"

"Look at me, you're my wife. I love you."

"What the hell is going on." 

"I love you." he says again and you finally decide to answer him, because if he really loved you this wouldn't be happening.

"Oh no, no. No. You can't say that, you don't love me." you say as you walk out of the kitchen, away from him.

"Don't do that. Don't do that. Just think!" he chases after you as you keep repeating that he doesn't love you." Think about your life and what you actually want."

You stop to look at him and he stands a couple of steps away from you, also looking at you. You can't believe he's done this, it's Jack, the guy who always said he was going to take care of you. Not some crazy guy who would put you in a place like this and treat you like you were just a doll to him. 

"You're a psycho. I had a life, you took my life." for a moment you think he's going to argue with you, but he stands still looking at you. "You made me feel like I was crazy...I came to you and you made me think I was fucking crazy."

"Alice, I'm so sorry" he kneels down in front of you and you look away, you can't look at him. "But they told me they would hurt you, I did all this so you'd be okay."

"You put me in here, you let them put me in here and then you let them treat me like I was crazy, you treated me like I was crazy and you let them hurt me, Jack." you stand in silence until you hear Jack sniffle and you turn to look at him, he's crying like you've never seen him and you wish you could hug him, but you can't bring yourself to fall.

"I'm so fucking sorry, you're right, this is all my fault, everything they've done to you is my fault." he sobs. "I couldn't find any work and I just wanted to find a way for you to stop taking the extra hours at the hospital, and I found that podcast and...it's all my fault."

You know you shouldn't do this, that a moment ago you didn't want to be around him, but seeing him so vulnerable and so broken hurts. It's Jack, you know he loves you, that he would do anything for you. You sigh before you move closer to him and let him hug your waist as he hides his head in your stomach.  

"I just sent them an email asking for more information about the programme, I swear I didn't do anything else. "He says against your dress. "I listened to the podcast and it seemed like it might be a good idea, I just wanted you to stop working your ass off for both of us, I wanted to take care of you. "

What he says disorients you, you thought Jack was to blame for you being here, but from what he says it doesn't add up. You bring your hands to his hair, the little curls he has in this reality feel much softer than his usual straight hair. He lifts his head from your dress, revealing his red eyes. A tear falls down his cheek and you move a hand away from his hair to wipe it away, leaving that hand on his cheek.

"I want you to tell me the whole truth, what this place is, what happened and why we are here," you say quietly and he nods.

"It's a virtual reality that Frank and his wife have invented where anyone who wants to can live an ideal life," he begins. "I found a podcast where they explained that this place could be a second chance, but they didn't give many details about how the programme worked, so I wrote to them."

He looks at you so sincerely that you can't help but believe him.

"It had been a month and I thought they would never get back to me, so I forgot about it. The day of the cinema, when they drugged you and forced me to go with them I was so scared, I thought they were going to kill us until Frank showed up and explained to me that they needed a couple to test the invention for the first time. He told me that they had been watching us and that we looked like the perfect couple, when he explained how it all worked I told him that you wouldn't think it was a good idea and that I was rejecting his proposal...but he told me that if I didn't agree to do it, they would hurt you...Alice, I'm so sorry I got you into this."

He rests his head on your stomach again and you place your hands in his hair again, tugging on it lightly. 

"So you let them put me in here."

"I just wanted to protect you." he whispers back. "And you seemed happy until you started to suspect everything."

"Until you started treating me like a crazy person."

"I never wanted you to feel like you were crazy." he lifts his head again and you drop your arms, taking your hands out of his hair.

"You let them take me to a place where they gave me electroshocks because they said I was crazy, even I thought I really was. "

"Frank told me it was that or they'd kill you, I had no choice."

And with that you burst into tears, turning away as you bring your hands to your face to cover your sobs. You stop feeling Harry's arms around your waist for a few seconds before you notice how he hugs your shoulders behind your back, resting his head in the hollow between your neck and shoulder. 

"You mean everything to me, you're my whole life and I love you, I'd do anything for you. You know that?" he whispers in your ear and you nod slowly." I don't want you to push me away, I don't want you to leave me, I want you to be happy."

Without pulling away from his embrace, you turn, your faces just inches apart. "I love you but I want to go back, I want to go home, I want to have the life we had before."

He looks at you for a few seconds before bringing his thumb to your lips, caressing them as he usually does, smiling at the same time.

"I love you and if that's what you want I'll do everything I can to get us out of here," you immediately place your arms around his shoulders and hug him, burying your head in his chest. "Let me take care of it. Don't worry, darling."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Thanks for reading and I hope you liked it, please leave any comments or leave a like it if you enjoyed it.

See you soon :)

[samuel-de-champagne-problems]

De(railed) +18

Summary: The canon episode "Derailed" reimagined where Reader is sent on the solo interview and Spencer, recklessly, decides to save her. Plus, the aftermath.

CW: mommy kink sub! Spencer x dom! female (she/her) reader, cum play, penetrative sex, light degradation, praise kink, light choking (mentioned), edging, calling him a slut (please let me know if I missed anything)

Word Count: 6 K (this is the longest thing I've ever written!)

Author's Note: Special thank you to @shemarmooresfedora for reading this for me because I was very nervous about the smut portion. And a very special thank you to @notanotherreidgirl for inspiring this idea! this was my ask so yeah, this is a little out there for me so be kind (*dips into the shadows*). Also I either really hate or really love this title :)

Taglist: You can join the taglist here!

De(railed)

Sitting on the train, headed towards Virginia for the custodial interview, you tried to remind yourself what Spencer said to you the previous night when you dropped him off at his apartment. You had his hands in yours and you could feel him shake with nerves when he spoke.

He told you that he believes in you. Even when you think that Hotch and Gideon are sending you out to the solo interview too early, Spencer believes in you. If only you’d believe a little bit in yourself, then maybe you’d be able to figure out a way off this train, but an armed man and innocent passengers proves that a little challenging.

The man passes the train up and down and you tell yourself to relax. In hindsight, it seems like a horrible series of events that lead to the man shooting the train attendant. You’ve done your best to keep him calm until the police can see him off the train. Looking outside, you see SWAT, local PD, and FBI lined up 50 yards from the train.

Continuing to wave his gun around the train, the unsub rants about wanting to talk to a higher authority. To yourself, to wish that Spencer was here with you. He’d have figured out exactly what was wrong with the man by now. For less than professional reasons, you’re forever grateful that he’s not here- that he’s safe on the other side of the train.

“He’s out of his mind,” the man holding a bottle of whiskey says, “You gotta do something, lady,” he says, taking a swig of his drink. Your eyes dart to him and back up the doctor, the unsub’s psychologist, looking for a way out.

You breathe deeply, hoping that the BAU would come up with a plan. Knowing FBI protocol, you expect them to try to initiate a line of communication. Glancing over at the unsub, you think that he’ll want to talk to someone who looks like they are powerful. That would be either Hotch or Gideon. Selfishly, you’re grateful that Spencer still looks like an underpaid TA with a toy gun attached at his hip.

“No! Please, don’t hurt me!” the young woman screams, trying to release herself from the man, Ted’s, grip. He releases her, throwing her to the ground when his phone rings.

Gideon.

On the phone with Gideon, the man demands for something to be removed. You can’t hear what he’s saying to the unsub, but you place the little faith you have left into hoping your team can save you.

***

His vest is much too big for him.

That’s all you can think of when you realize Spencer is the “technician” that they’re sending in. His tie and shirt stick awkwardly and there is a gap in his shoulders around the vest. The straps are pulled so tight that they nearly fold over. His hands aren’t shaking when he carries the small black box, but his eyes look terrified.

You want to reach out to him, maybe hold his hand or brush the strands of hair that have fallen into his face, but you can’t. You have to sit there and pretend that this is the first time you’ve met him. It’s excruciatingly sick and mildly amusing in an equally twisted way. The first time you’ve come to terms with loving Spencer, you both can very well die.

“I’m here for the chip,” Spencer says, holding his hands up, “the higher authorities sent me,” he claims, feeding into the unsubs delusion. You shield your glance, unable to trust yourself from launching yourself in between Spencer and the man with the gun.

“That’s far enough and drop your weapons,” Ted says, holding the crying woman by her neck, “and take that vest off. I want to see you,”

“I don’t have any weapons. They don’t authorize them for-”

“I said take it off!” the man shouts, throwing the woman to the ground.

Spencer complies, taking off the much too big vest and tossing it to the ground. He holds his hands up, playing the part of the unsuspecting underling well. He reaches out to Ted, showing him the tools that he’ll use to take out the “chip”. You wonder how Spencer will pull it off, but you know he will in the end.

Spencer digs into the man’s skin with the scalpel. You can’t catch the sleight of hand, but you know that’s what he used.

“I have to leave, the higher authorities need the chip-”

“Turn it on,” Ted orders, “Turn it on!” he screams, his voice booming in the small train.

Spencer’s eyes dart to yours thinking of ways that he can get out of here. He looks almost sorry, and you feel a wave of intense regret. The thousands of times you could have said those little words seem so simple now.

“I can’t turn it on,” Spencer says, “I can’t turn it on,” You hate how scared he sounds, and you hate even more how you have to pretend that you don’t know him.

“Why!” the unsub yells, thrashing the gun around, “You’re one of them!”

Thinking quickly when you see him point the gun at Spencer’s face, you jump to your feet. You push Spencer out of the way, terrified that he’ll do something rash. You can’t lose Spencer, not when you’ve hadn’t had the chance to have him yet.

“It needs to be implanted to be activated,” you say, “I know this stuff Ted, I’m a Fed. Only me. Everyone else,Ted is just innocent. Just let them go, Ted,” you plead, “Just let them go,”

“No!” he yells, shooting up into the ceiling of the train, “no!”

The windows are closed, but you suspect that Hotch and Gideon have the train surrounded by now. Spencer moves closer to you, staring at the man as he scratches his upper arm. He drops his hand towards yours and squeezes, like he’s saying sorry and saying goodbye all in one touch. You don’t realize this before it’s too late.

“Doctor Brier,” Spencer says, standing up with his hands near his head, “you’re right, there’s more-”

“Just make it stop!” the desperate man pleas, “Make it stop!”

“I know what it’s like, Ted. The voices, they’ve been talking to you since you were a kid. They don’t stop. I know what it’s like Ted,” Spencer says, inching closer and closer to him, “Leo? Why don’t you let him think for himself?” Spencer says, trying to use the man’s delusion against him.

“Don’t! Stop, you’re trying to trick me!” the man begs, whipping the gun around too close to Spencer’s face, “stop!”

You always listen to Spencer. Whatever he talks about, you listen. From Russian cinema to Star Trek to the Birch and Swinnerton-Dyer conjecture, you listen to him. It’s not that hard and it’s easy to get lost in his eyes or the way his hands move when he talks. But the seconds leading up to when the gunshot goes off, you’re not listening.

Because without Spencer, there isn’t much worth listening to.

***

Your eyes are squeezed shut so when a large hand hovers over your shoulder you jump at the touch. It takes you all of ten seconds to realize it’s Spencer. You look him over, searching for signs of mortal wounds that will rip him from your clutches, but there isn’t any.

“You’re okay,” you say, wanting nothing more but to kiss him or yell at him, or maybe a mix of the two, “you’re okay,” you repeat, not fully believing it the first time.

“We’re okay,” Spencer says, hugging you tight as you collapse into his arms, not caring if the rest of the team watches.

“I haven’t been fair to you, Spence,” you say, breaking from the hug to caress his face. You stop, holding his face in your hands, soaking him in, “you’re not someone who gets strung along, baby. I fucking love you and you-you mean so much to me. And I hate-I hate that it took you almost dying for me to realize that,” you cry, unable to care anymore.

“You love me?” Spencer whispers, unable, himself to care that they have an audience, “You love me back, but I’m, I-I,”

“Spencer,” you tell him, pausing to kiss him fully, “I,” you plant another kiss, on his right cheek, “love,” left cheek, “you,” forehead.

“You do, don’t you?” he says, looking at you with a proud smirk, “I guess that’s good because, I love you, Y/N. I don’t go risk my life just for everyone,”

“Watch yourself, baby,” you remind him, channeling the surge of pure life that runs through your veins, “you’re in for it later, my darling,” you tell him, whispering into his ear so only he can hear.

***

You didn’t even give him time to breathe before you pushed him up against the wall. Spencer’s hands still held yours, you don’t think that he dropped them since you two safely exited the train. He whimpers through the kiss, his breathy moan only serving to spur you on. His hands broke from yours, clinging to your waist. Spencer tries to peel your clothes from your skin, but he's much too distracted by your lips that travel across his cheekbones and down to his neck. He’s breathless and panting, but you don’t let up. If he’s breathing, he’s alive and that’s all that matters now.

“I’m so sorry, so sorry,” Spencer pleads, the desperation in his voice causing you to pause from your attack on his neck, “I-I, Y/N,” he stutters, feeling empty without your kisses.

“I’m not mad, sweet boy. I’m not mad at you,” you say, laying on a sweet voice as your fingers skim through Spencer’s hair. He’s shaking slightly and closes his eyes, looking like he’s grateful to be alive.

“You’re not, but I wasn’t good,” he whispers, “I wasn’t good for you, Mommy,”

You do everything in your power to keep your composure, but after a day like today, you’re ready to melt into him. He might be the one begging at your feet soon, but there’s no doubt in your mind that it’s you who's wrapped around his finger. He looks up at you, with his back leaning against the wall; his face flushed pink and marks littering his neck.

“You scared me, Spence. I thought- I just let me take care of you,” you request, dropping your hands from his hair and grabbing onto his hand as you lead him to your bedroom. You’ve made it a habit to go to your place after cases; Spencer claims that the sunlight that dips into your bedroom in the morning is more pleasant than his view of the street, but you know he just prefers your bed and the attention he gets at your place.

“Please, Y/N,” he begs, following you into the bedroom. He’s at your heels and burrowed deeply in your heart, exactly where you want him.

You drop his hands, guiding him so his knees hit the edge of your plush bed. He kicks off his shoes and starts to undo his tie and shirt, but you stop him before he gets the chance.

“Let me do that for you, baby. I’m taking care of you tonight,” you say, feeling your heart swell as he looks up at you adoringly, “Mommy’s got you, my brave boy,” you tell him, your fingers grazing over his cheekbones, his nose and eyes. His eyes close as you continue to draw shapeless shapes over his skin.

“Thank you,” he mutters, saying it like a pray as he relaxes for the first time today, “thank you, Mommy,”

You smile at the name, enjoying how pliant he is as you unbutton his shirt and loosen his tie. His flushed cheeks lead down his equally flushed chest. You place both your legs over his body, hovering over him as you straddle him. The proximity eggs him on and the minimal friction near his pants causes him to buck up words. Mercilessly, you chuckle at his attempt to get off. You want nothing more than to put him out of his misery, but watching him squirm for the tiniest bit of affection— your affection makes you nearly as desperate as Spencer.

“Patience, sweetheart,” you tell him, harshly pulling off his shirt as you nibble on his ear. He whimpers out in desire, already unable to form coherent thoughts even though you’ve so much as kissed him.

You stop touching him, sinking down to your knees before him. Spencer looks down at you, his pupils blown and his hair messy from being pushed up against the wall. His breathing is erratic and unmeasured, but he’s heart is still beating. You smile, unafraid and not caring that it breaks character as you give his thigh a squeeze. You bring his hands to his buttons, motioning for him to unbutton his pants for you.

“I can’t do all the work now, can I, baby?” You question rhetorically, quite self satisfied that he nods eagerly. He quickly undoes his pants, kicking the heavy corduroy trousers near your bathroom door. If the moment wasn’t so tense and erratic, you probably would have teased him for his excitement.

“I want to touch you, please? Mommy” Spencer starts, his hands holding your face as you kneel. He holds your face so delicately and gently, it’s a contrast to the sinful way he’s squirming above you.

“Not yet,” you tsk, slipping your finger under the waistband of his boxers. The bulge in his underwear looks very uncomfortable, but Spencer clearly tries his best to behave under your strong stare. You peel back the underwear and let it drop to Spencer’s feet. His cock, now exposed, is painfully hard. He concentrates on his breathing and trying to remain composed as your fingers travel up his leg and towards his groin.

“There’s my pretty boy,” you coo, grabbing Spencer’s jaw and making him look down at you. He lets pitiful whine at your words, “Come on, make my fingers nice and wet,” you order, sticking out two fingers that he sucks enthusiastically.

“What a good little slut I have, you’re sucking Mommy’s fingers just as if it’s my strap, aren’t you sweet boy,” you say, gently resting your other palm loosely around his neck. You don’t apply any pressure, but let it serve as a reminder of what could happen.

Happily, Spencer sucks your fingers, moaning around them and bucking his hips up in frustration. Marred by impatience, you remove your fingers from his mouth and kneel back down on the floor. Loosely, you grip his cock with your wet fingers. Spencer whines at the friction that’s nothing close to enough.

“Tell me how that feels,” you demand, “Tell Mommy how I makes you feel,”

“I-I feel,” Spencer starts, concentrating intently, but unable to truly articulate the passion you ignite in him, “Mommy, you make me feel so good,” Spencer says, finally finding the words, even though they barely scratch the surface.

“That’s all I want, baby. You deserve to feel good. So let me take care of you, my love,” you tell him, watching as he simpers at your words.

For a second there you let yourself think that maybe it’s calling him my love that prompted his reaction, not the promise of his cock in your mouth. You know after tonight there’s no tip toeing around it anymore: you’re unequivocally in love with him and you’re a little disappointed that it took the pair of you nearly dying to figure it out finally.

Looking back up at him, you abandon your plans for a moment. You kiss him hard. Normally, you’d hate the way your teeth clash against someone else’s and how the kiss isn’t really a kiss. It’s hard to pace yourself when he’s whimpering below you as you grind down hard on his crotch. The fabric of your pants provides much needed friction, causing Spencer to cry out in a twisted mix of pleasure and pain. He paws at your work short, silently begging for you to shed your layers as well.

“Good boys wait,” you tell him, kissing his forehead and sinking back down for the last time. You’ll never be done teasing him, but for now you intend to put his needs first.

“Such a pretty cock that only I get to see,” you coo, running a finger up his length, relishing in how he shudders at your touch. You’ve touched him so many times, yet he reacts each time as if it’s the first. He’s leaking precum as his breathing becomes more and more strained. This is far from your first time with Spencer and you’re well aware of the signs of his release.

Smiling up at him, you lazily wrap your hand around him, giving him the smallest bit of friction and attention that he needs to come. You drop him once he’s close to the edge, his pleading, begging eyes turning glazed over when he realizes you’re taking off your shirt. By the way he’s looking at you, you’d think you’d be wearing your best lingerie. Quickly, you’ve learned that with Spencer you could be wearing your ratty college tee shirts and he’d still look at you like you were dripping in gold.

“Mommy,” he pleads, “I’m a good boy,” he says, no trying to convince himself to hold back from his release, “please Mommy. I’m gonna-“ Spencer says, the flush on his face deepening as he throws his head back in ecstasy. However, he summons enough energy and will to reach out and palm your boobs. You don’t hide your moans as he rolls a nipple in between his thumb and pointer finger. It only encourages him, but nowhere can you find in yourself to care.

“I’m sorry, Mommy,” Spencer whimpers, unable to hold himself up anymore and collapsing on the bed. His chest heaves up and down as he tries to collect himself. He comes all over your chest, staining your lavender bralette and looking very proud of himself. Spencer learned quickly as well that coming before you’ve even touched him earns him quite the praise.

“Such a good boy,” you praise, choosing to ignore him coming without permission, “such a messy boy though,” you chastise, squeezing his thigh and crawling your fingers up his chest.

“Mommy, please, I want to make you feel good too. I love you,” Spencer begs, his eyes droopy with exhaustion from the long day and glazed over with his orgasm. His words slur together as if he's drunk off something potent. His eyes meet yours, but flit down quickly. He scans your soiled chest, licking his lips unconsciously as his eyes rank over your breasts covered in the lavender lacy and stained with his cum.

“Do you know what good boys do?” You ask, expecting Spencer to answer the question without hesitation.

“They clean up their mess, Mommy,” he says. In a moment of bravery, he grabs your hand, guiding you to lay down on the bed. He twists his hands around your back, unlatching your bra from your body and tosses it on the ground.

Above you, Spencer lowers his face so his chin barely grazes your chest. His tongue darts out onto your skin, licking up the messy cum that fell on your chest. You place your hands in his hair, gripping firmly. It’s not hard enough to cause any pain, but it’s tight enough to remind him to stay put. Spencer hums contently, lapping up your chest, but keeping his eyes trained on yours. You pull him up by his hair, pieces fall over his blissed out eyes. He smiles up at you, his chin glistening with cum, but looking pleased with himself.

“That’s a good boy,” you praise, pulling him up to kiss him deeply. His tongue swirls around in yours and his large hands cup your face. You can feel him moving in your lap, more and more desperate for attention and friction as you continue to hold him off, “I love you, baby,” you say, hoping that he’ll hear enough times for it to stick and for him to start living his life like he wants to stay alive.

“Just for you, Mommy,” Spencer mumbles, already sucking and marking the valley between your breasts, “Can you? Please?” Spencer asks, still embarrassed, after all these months to put to words his desires.

“What, baby? You need to use your words,” you tell him, scooting up in the bed and smirking to yourself as Spencer practically chases you up the headboard, “You need to tell him what you want me to do, baby,” you say, talking slowly as you rub circles into his skin. He’s still hot to the touch and flushed all over.

“I want to make you feel good,” Spencer begs, licking his fiery red lips that are swollen and bitten from your earlier treatment, “I want you to feel good,” he says, attempting to buck his hips against your legs.

“Are you sure about that, Spence?” you ask, teasing him with your wandering hands. One stays latching in his hair, exposing his criminally bare neck and the other sneaks down to his cock, but hardly satisfies his burning need, “Because it seems like you’re an insolent little slut who only cares if he gets off. Do I need to remind you that I have needs as well,” you chide, increasing your grip on his hair as your lips nip the sensitive skin of his neck. He shudders in response, unable to fully articulate a sentence.

“But you’re lucky, you’re beautiful, Dr. Reid,” you say, dropping his hair and letting his head fall onto your chest. Knowing your expectations, Spencer doesn’t hesitate to kiss and nip along your skin. You feel your panties dampen at the sight of him: his hair wild and messy, his neck marked with evidence of your mouth, and his chest is bright red, somehow still flustered and embarrassed by your affections. You find it bizarre that he still doesn’t fully believe just how head over heels you are for him. He’s too good and pure for this world, and you’ll happily spend the rest of your life reminding him just how deserving of goodness and pureness he is.

“I love you,” Spencer whimpers against your skin, his breath is hot as he pants, “but please fuck me,” he begs, flipping around on his back so you can be on top.

“Don’t worry, sweet boy, Mommy will take care of you,” you remind him, balancing yourself so you can hover over him, “Now, I’d normally want you to be quiet, but I want to hear everything. So use that pretty mouth of yours and tell me how you feel, sweetie,” you instruct, maneuvering yourself so you’re lined up with him.

“Give me a second, please,” Spencer asks, pushing himself up so his back rests against the headboard, “You make me crazy, I just need a moment to think,” he says, quietly, staring off nothing in the bedroom. You take the opportunity to grab his hand, that’s gripping onto your floral patterned sheets, and kiss his scars on his knuckles. Some are new and fresh, while others are old, from longer ago than working at the BAU. You kiss them over, as if your lips are able to help the evidence of his physical pain.

“You make me crazy too, Spencer,” You say, growing more and more unhinged as he moves underneath you, “I love you so much, darling,” you tell him, kissing his eyes, lips, nose, anything you can reach.

Slowly, so slowly, you sink down onto Spencer. You watch his microexpressions, but you know how he’ll react. He squeezes his eyes shut, as if he’s willing himself to hold off. He breathes in and out, teetering on the edge. You wait for his nod, for his sign of approval that you can move. He whines and peeks open his eyes. Spencer’s hands dig into your waist, his strong, large hands searching for any skin to grab onto.

“Please move, Mommy,” Spencer begs, burying his head into the crook of your neck as he starts to plead with you to have mercy on him, “I need it, Mommy,” he moans.

“Don’t be greedy, darling. You’ll take what I give you, but don’t you want to make me feel good too, baby,” you ask, guiding his nimble fingers to your slick core. His thumb and pointer finger begin to rub quick circles around your clit. You bite your lip, trying to keep your composure as you feel the pressure build. Between the heightened tensions of work and Spencer's hot breath against your neck, you know that you’ll come soon. Spencer’s breathy moans get more and more desperate.

“Are you already going to come again, love?” You ask, increasing your pace. His other hand grips your thigh, drawing shapes into your soft skin. Following suit, you match his sweet movements on his cheek. His breath is his shaky as you stroke his cheek lovingly, “Make me come first and then, maybe if you’re good, I’ll let you come inside me,” you promise, already knowing that you’ll let him come inside you.

“Watch you disappear inside me, baby. Watch your pretty cock slip inside my pussy. It’s just like you were made for me, darling,” you cry, your voice getting slightly breathy yourself. You watch yourself as his cock goes in and out, red with overstimulation. Spencer’s eyes, littered with small tears, looks transfixed.

“Fuck,” Spencer says, “I’m so close, Mommy. I-I, you make me feel so good. You’re so beautiful, I-I-”

“So needy, you’re so fucking needy,” you say to him. You can tell he’s growing more and more impatient by the moment. His hands lurch towards your chest, pawing at your boobs. Spencer’s sloppy movements bring you closer and closer to the edge.

“So good, so good,” he repeats, his sweaty forehead rests on your collarbone. You pull him up again his hair, relishing in the pitiful moan that he lets out. It’s raw and pure sin, it should make you want to fuck him more, but it only makes you want to love him more.

You’re drunk on him. Drunk on his moans and whimpers of pleasure. You’re drunk on the way his skin sticks to yours and how his hands roam around your body, always finding a spot on your torso and legs that makes you approach the edge closer and closer. You wonder, for a second, if you’re being too hard on him. If you should just whisper that little sentence and let Spencer feel the wave of pleasure.

“I need it, Mommy,” Spencer pants, kissing lined up your chest and collarbone. His face is pressed up against your face and moves up and down as you continue your pace, “I-I, Mommy, I want you to-”

“What do you want, baby? Hmm? Tell Mommy?” You ask, your voice sounding sickly sweet. The noise of moans fills the room, Spencer’s moan akin to whimpers and whines and your’s more like praises and words of approval, “you’ve been such a good boy, baby I’ll give you want whatever you want, my love”

“Please, please let me make you come, Mommy. I need you to come, Mommy. I need it,” Spencer whines, looking up into your eyes and latching onto them in the darkness.

It’s sinful how the filthy words contrast with his sweet, shy tones. He looks so innocent, but enthralling with his face between your hands, but his own hands rubbing small circles on your clit. His moans grow more high pitched. You kiss by his ear, ready to whisper the words of approval that you’ve neared your release.

“Oh god, Spencer. God. You have no idea what you do to me. My sweet boy,” you murmur, pressing Spencer’s face further into your chest. You can feel him heave and his breathing grow more and more unsteady, but he still has enough sense to continue rubbing your clit.

You kiss him, wanting to feel him everywhere when you come undone. Kissing him is desperate and full of gasps of air. His skin is so soft as you slide across his mouth, up his cheeks, and over his jaw. His helpless moans spur you on, giving you the strength and energy to thrust down on him another time before you feel yourself come undone.

“It’s your turn, baby. Come on, sweetheart. Come inside me and maybe I’ll have to call you daddy? Hmm?” you chant, halting your movements to torture him a little longer.

“Please, Y/N. Please let me fill you up,” Spencer begs, his voice hoarse and scratchy from being so vocal, “I’m yours. I love you so much,” he calls out, wrapping his arms around you so your chests are pressed up together. He holds you sweetly and you kiss his shoulders and his neck, choosing to leave a large red welt as a reminder for him.

“You like that? Hmm you like if I call you Daddy and let you fill me up? Come on, Spencer. You can come. Don’t you want to be a good boy for Mommy?,” you say, giving him the permission that he’s been desiring all night.

He tightens his grip on your upper half as he meets his release. Spencer’s strangled moans turn into sweet whimpers as he looks down into your laps. Quietly, you ride him through the rest of his orgasm, letting him come down from his high peppered with light pecks along his freckled shoulders and sharp jawline. Spencer smiles into the kisses, his eyes are shut and his cheeks are dusted with a light pink flush. For the first time today, he looks relaxed and safe.

“Thank you, Mommy,” Spencer says quietly, mirroring your motions and kissing your shoulders and neck as you slow your pace, “Can we stay like this. Just for a moment,” Spencer asks, burning for the feeling of being inside you for even a couple more minutes.

“Of course, baby,” you tell him, squeezing him into a tight hug, “you did so wonderful for me. Such a good boy. I love my sweet boy,” you tell him, brushing the stray hairs from his face. His neck is marked by your mouth and his eyes are glazed with sleep and desire.

“I love you,” Spencer says again, his forehead falling against yours and his breath hitching as you move slightly with him inside you, “and I’m sorry. I’m sorry about today,”

“Let’s get you cleaned up, sweetheart and then we’ll talk about it,” you suggest, taking the opportunity to kiss his lips as you pull yourself away from his lap.

Spencer doesn’t say much in response, but nods silently. He groans slightly as you separate your bodies and he tries to chase your lips with his as you climb out of the bed and into your bathroom.

“Please come back,” Spencer says, sounding like he wasn’t sure if you’d keep your promise.

“I’m right here, Spence,” you reassure him, returning from the bathroom dressed in an old tee shirt and carrying a warm, damp washcloth and a pair of clean underwear for Spencer.

“Can you please hold me? Please, Y/N. I need you,” Spencer says, reaching out to you in the dark. That’s one request you know you’d never deny.

“Of course, Spence. Just let me clean you up and I’ll hold you,” you tell him, gently dragging the warm towel over his skin. He’s quiet as you clean him up, but his soulful eyes look lost and sheepish, making him look smaller and more vulnerable than he actually is. You drop the towel to the floor, not caring that the water isn’t good for the floor.

You lay back down on the bed and Spencer, like a magnet to another magnet, crawls in close. He’s still undressed, except for the underwear that you gave him. His eyes are droopy and his breathing is still shaky, but steadies out as your hands draw circles on his back. You pull the covers up to his chin, making sure he’s covered before you start what you know all too well is a difficult conversation.

“Spencer,” you croak, “Why did you do that? Why do you think that’s okay?” you ask, still trying to make sense of why Spencer would risk his life like that so recklessly. You hold him tighter, squeezing his arm as he breathes out, ready to tell you what he’s never told anyone before.

“Bec-, because- I don’t matter,” he says, the words choking out between cries of years and years of pain, “because it doesn’t matter to anyone if I don’t come home. I don’t have anyone to come home to,”

“You’ve always had me,” you say quietly, “I’m your person to come home with, Spence,” you tell him, hoping with all the faith in your body that he’ll believe you. You hold his hand, weaving your fingers in his. Looking at your hands intertwined together, you’d think that your hand was made for it. It’s a little cliche, but Spencer is the kind of man that makes all those cliches seem like wonderful possibilities.

“I-I, I never had someone before,” Spencer says, “I mean, I had my mom, but it’s gotten harder. But then, then, I met you. And I never thought you’d like me like that, Y/N. I never thought you could love me,”

“Spencer,” you say, twisting around so you can hold his face in your hands, “Spencer, I love you. You are so much more than your job. You’re worthy of being loved, Goose. And I’d spend the rest of my life making you realize this”

“You want to spend the rest of your life- the rest of your life with me?” Spencer asks, sounding like he can’t believe the words that you say.

“Spence, I’ve loved you since I’ve known you,” you say, dragging your hands through his curly hair that’s matted against his forehead, “You would have realized that if you weren’t too carried away with making me your future history,”

“I think I have a habit of doing that,” Spencer confesses, kissing your forehead sweetly, “You’re- I’m sorry that I worried you like that, but for so long, for so long this is all I’ve had. And before that it was school. I throw myself into academia or work because it’s all I had,”

“Had,” you repeat, “as in the past tense. You’ve had some much more than too, Spence. We all love you. Elle and Derek. JJ and Hotch. Penny and Gideon. We all love you, but I love you the most,”

“Good,” Spencer replies, turning his head down to kiss you, “because I love you the most,”

His lips glide across yours, moving slowly at first and faster as he grows more urgent. There’s no sense in rushing through. You could kiss him lazily in your bed all night and continue until it gives way to morning. There’s no time limit, no buzzer that’s going to go off and force Spencer to whole himself back up into his past. He smiles through the kiss, knowing well that there’s more to come tomorrow, or maybe even tonight. His lips were warm and soft, maybe still a little tender from before, but still eager to feel your lips against his. Breathing together, savoring that you both are breathing, you smile yourself, fully ready for whatever comes next.

***

Taglist (not my usual taglist because I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable bc this is smut. You can join the taglist here!)

@shemarmooresfedora @just-another-persona123 @folkreid @idonotexiste @pastelbabygirl19 @reidsbookclub @fandomfriend33 @spencersrose @strawberryspence

[pwilzfan73]

True story behind The Conjuring 3 – inside Arne Cheyenne Johnson’s “the devil made me do it” court case

The latest instalment in The Conjuring franchise once again has its roots in a real-life case.

By Patrick Cremona, Radio Times. UK.

Published: Friday, 21st May 2021 at 2:56 pm

The Conjuring 3 takes its title from a real-life court case that dates back to the 1980s. The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It takes a look at the case and the Warrens’ involvement in the case that originated the phrase “the devil made me do it”.

Patrick Wilson and Vera Farmiga return as paranormal investigators Ed and Lorraine Warren for the next instalment in The Conjuring horror franchise, with the new movie heading to UK cinemas on 28th May 2021.

As with the previous movies in the franchise, The Conjuring 3 is taken from a real case file with reported connections to the supernatural. Previously we’ve seen spin-off movies focused on the Annabelle doll, also inspired by the Warrens who keep it in their occult museum.

Vera Farmiga and Patrick Wilson as Lorraine and Ed Warren. Warner Bros Pictures.

The case in question this time around is the trial of Arne Cheyenne Johnson, a man who was convicted of manslaughter in Connecticut in 1981 – becoming the first person to have claimed a defence of demonic possession during a murder trial.

The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It true story

The Conjuring 3 is inspired by the trial of 19-year-old Arne Cheyenne Johnson, who was charged with murdering his landlord Alan Bono in February 1981. During the trial, the defendant gained infamy for becoming the first person to claim a defence of demonic possession in a United States court – although perhaps unsurprisingly this version of events was not accepted by the judge.

His defence rested on testimony given by the family of his fiancée, Debbie Glatzel. Debbie’s 11-year-old brother had reportedly been the subject of demonic possession in the months prior to the murder, with his parents having grown increasingly worried by a number of unexplained and ominous events.

The story really starts in July 1980, when the 11-year-old David Glatzel was helping Johnson clean up a Connecticut rental property he was prepping to move so he could move in.

While there David claimed to have come across a “burnt and black-looking” old man who he claims pushed him into a waterbed saying he would bring them harm if they moved into the house.

When David returned home he continued to see the old man. He described him as having a white beard, wearing jeans and a flannel shirt. David claimed the man’s skin was charred as if he’d been burnt too. The young boy experienced night terrors and woke up with bruises and scratches on his body. He’d wake screaming and tell his parents he’d seen the sunken features of the old man “like an animal”, with horns, pointy hears and jagged teeth (via People). (The Conjuring 3 demon appears to have gone a different route, with early photos showing a white masked man wearing a striped red long coat.)

The family said they also had heard unexplained noises coming from their attic.

In trying to get to the bottom of the issue they had called in Ed and Lorraine Warren – who by this point were already well-known paranormal experts – to diagnose and cure their son.

Ed Warren said he heard banging and growling sounds coming from their basement, and that he also say a rocking chair move on its own. Speaking to paranormal researcher Tony Spera, Ed claimed David’s toy dinosaur also walked on its own towards the family. He also said a deep voice spoke to them saying: “Beware, you’re all going to die.”

Lorraine also claimed she saw a black mist appear next to David while her husband interviewed him. “While Ed interviewed the boy, I saw a black, misty form next to him, which told me we were dealing with something of a negative nature. Soon the child was complaining that invisible hands were choking him—and there were red marks on him. He said that he had the feeling of being hit,” she told People magazine.

David’s mother Judy had previously claimed it was a ghost, but the Warrens rejected this idea saying it was an indicator of a demon.

Lorraine also claimed she saw David being choked by invisible hands and he told her “he had the feeling he was being hit”. She told People that she could see red marks afterwards and she heard him growl and hiss. Lorraine also claimed he spoke in unrecognisable voices, that he recited passages of the Bible as well as Paradise Lost. Debbie Glatzel also claimed he spit, bit, kicked and swore at her and he flopped around “head to toe like a ragdoll”.

She also told the Chippewa Herald Telegram that “he manifested. Just a face on the wall. High cheekbones. A narrow chin. A thin nose. Big black eyes hidden in dark holes. He showed his teeth.”

Ed Warren also told The Washington Post: “Right away, I knew there was something to this. I felt like a good fisherman when he knows there’s something on the line.” He added that he thought there were 43 demons inside the boy, and David named them all.

David Glatzel’s exorcism

In the movie, Father Gordon (Steve Coulter) blesses the home. The priest’s name was changed for the movie, but a Roman Catholic priest did visit the home to bless it.

After continued efforts from the Warrens, the Glatzels, and multiple priests (including Rev Francis E.Virgulak) a formal exorcism took place, with witnesses claiming that a demon fled the child’s body.

Ed Warren claimed Arne, who was present at the exorcism, shouted: “Take me on, leave my little buddy alone!”

Apparently, David showed signs of improving, but Arne started to deteriorate. TV series A Haunting covered the case in the episode Where Demons Dwell, claiming that the demon took control of Johnson’s car forcing it into a tree. While he was uninjured, he was shaken by the experience. The series also blamed a demon when Johnson fell from a tree while working.

Judy told The Washington Post she paid $75 an hour for a session with a local psychiatrist too, but it was up to church officials to set up and pay for further psychological testing (via Newsweek). David’s parents were told he was “normal” but had a “minimal learning disability”.

Alan Bono’s murder

Clearly not content with its newfound freedom, though, the story goes that the spirit then immediately took control of Johnson and it was under his control that the murder of the landlord took place several months later.

Johnson and Debbie Glatzel decided against renting the original home, and instead rented a small house near Debbie’s work. Debbie was working a dog groomer for the landlord, Alan Bono, 40, who was also the kennel manager.

Bono, who has been renamed in the movie as Bruno Sauls, lived in an apartment above the kennels.

On the day of the murder, Johnson had taken the day off work and spent the day with Debbie, 26, at the kennel. Along with some other companions, Debbie, Johnson and Bono had lunch at a local restaurant and enjoyed a few drinks, becoming drunk in the process, and when they later returned to the kennel a heated fight broke out with Bono becoming increasingly agitated.

During this argument, Bono seized Debbie’s nine-year-old cousin Mary, who had also been present, and refused to let her go – which then led Johnson to confront him and eventually stab him repeatedly with a five-inch pocket knife, all while growling like an animal. Bono suffered “four or five tremendous wounds” mainly to his chest area.

Bono died several hours later and Johnson was later arrested roughly two miles away from the murder. The murder is believed to be the first murder in Brookfield, Connecticut’s 193-year history, and the first in the 30 years since the town had police records.

The next day, Lorraine Warren immediately claimed that it was a case of demonic possession, which naturally led to much media coverage around the world.

Ed and Lorraine Warren

Ed and Lorraine Warren arrive at Danbury Superior Court - Getty

Arne Johnson’s Trial

Johnson’s trial began on 28th October 1981 at Connecticut’s Superior Court in Danbury.

Johnson’s lawyer Martin Minnella attempted to enter a plea of “not guilty” due to demonic possession stating Johnson “was possessed by a demon, and it was a demon who actually manipulated his body.” It was the first known court case in US history that had attempted this defence.

Minnella, speaking about the case and the fame that followed, said: “The courts have dealt with the existence of God. Now they’re going to have to deal with the existence of the Devil.” (via the New York Times).

However, the plea of not guilty due to demonic possession was immediately thrown out by presiding judge Robert Callahan who said that it would be “irrelative and unscientific” to allow testimony on these grounds, and so despite the ensuing media attention the jury was not legally allowed to consider demonic possession.

Johnson’s defence claimed that he hadn’t been the same after Glatzel’s exorcism, and witnesses were called upon saying they saw a demon transfer from Glatzel to Johnson. Debbie Glatzel also testified that Johnson behaved similarly to Glatzel. Ed Warren claimed Johnson had made a “fatal mistake” by taunting the alleged demon.

Debbie claimed Johnson had come to Bono’s apartment to repair a stereo for him, but that Bono had been drinking red wine and the pair got into an argument about payment for the repair. She also said Johnson was in a trance when he stabbed Bono.

According to reports, in the three months Debbie and Johnson had lived next to Bono they had been friends. The police believed that Bono and Debbie’s relationship was more than boss and employee, but Debbie denied this despite the police claiming the argument was over her rather than the stereo. The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It does take this angle into the story, exploring the ‘jealous lover’ plot, which was also shown in the 1983 movie The Demon Murder Case (starring Kevin Bacon).

L-R Patrick Wilson (Ed Warren), Sarah Catherine Hook (Debbie Glatzel) and Vera Farmiga (Lorraine Warren) in New Line Cinema’s ‘The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It.

After the jury deliberated for more than three days, Johnson was convicted of first-degree manslaughter on 24th November 1981 and was sentenced to between 10 and 20 years in prison. He was released in 1986 having only served five years of his sentence.

Even though demonic possession was not actually allowed as a legitimate defence in the trial, the case became colloquially known as “the Devil made me do it case” – hence the subtitle of this film.

Where are the Glatzels and Johnson now?

Johnson married Debbie Glatzel while he was in prison. He also got his high school diploma while inside. The pair went on to have two children.

Lorraine Warren went on to write the book The Devil in Connecticut with Gerald Brittle detailing the case, and they shared the profits from the sales with the Glatzel family. David’s brother Carl Glatzel did speak out against the book when it was republished in 2006 saying it was a “complete lie” and that “the Warrens concocted a phoney story about demons in an attempt to get rich and famous at our expense.”

Carl claimed the Warrens told the family they’d be millionaires – it was later confirmed they were paid $2,000. Carl also says David was suffering with his mental health at the time, but he recovered. In 2007, David and Carl filed a lawsuit against Brittle and the Warrens for unspecified financial damages. They sued the authors and publishers for violating their privacy, libel and “intentional infliction of emotional distress.”

Brittle claims his book is based on fact and he interviewed the Glatzel family for more than 100 hours, which he has video of. Lorraine Warren also said the six priests who performed exorcisms on Glatzel agreed that he was possessed.

Debbie Glatzel and Arne Johnson have always backed the account of the possession, but David’s father denies his son was possessed.

How the movie tackles such a complicated case and how closely they stick to the real life events remains to be seen.

The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It is released in cinemas on 4th June, 2021 on HBO Max and 28th May in the UK.

[beaudeanw]

Soldier Boy- What can we expect?

- Possible spoilers ahead

Gif credit : @justjensenanddean

The Boys S3 will have Jensen Ackles as Soldier Boy - A Captain America-esque Supe, also known as the original superhero.

In the comic books, there are three versions of Soldier Boy. Ackles will be playing the first one. According to Eric Kripke, Soldier Boy is like the Homelander before Homelander. He has a similar kind of ambition & ego. It will just come in a different way.

He was a leader of the Team Payback - a Parody of The Avengers.

In the show, Soldier boy was the only one to ever exist.

Soldier Boy as a Character

As said above, Soldier Boy is touted to be very powerful. His powers are almost on the same level as Homelander.

According to a recent q&a with Kripke, he mentioned that Homelander will be threatened by Soldier Boy. Soldier Boy is said to be very Charming and Funny.

He will have this charisma that attracts the public towards him. As mentioned in the first episode of The Boys Season 2, Soldier Boy killed Nazis by a huge amount and he helped the Allies win the World War 2 against Germany. After that he went on to become a movie star and a huge mainstay of American culture.

During the course of S2 we saw some Easter eggs like his movie posters on the wall. Kripke compared his character to somewhat like John Wayne. If you google search John Wayne, you will get to know that he was conservative, racist, homophobic etc. John Wayne although famous for playing Soldiers in cinema, never served in WW2. He also had a complicated relationship with women.

Soldier Boy might take some similar route considering the fact that he is in fact from the 1940s. The q&a mentioned that he will be involved in a lot of Sex, Violence & Swears. Needless to say, soldier boy can totally be a. One of the 2018 tweets of Kripke said that Soldier Boy was involved in drugs & stuff. This might also be a part of his personality.

Since it's also said to be a parody of Cap America, Soldier Boy a complete anti-thesis of what former stands for. Cap America is sort of a moral, altruistic, kind & good superhero. Soldier Boy might be completely opposite. That he has no shame in hurting people & possesses no morals in order to get his work done & his ambition fulfilled. He can be the reason for the war crimes that America did after the WW2.

How the character might fit in S3

Now The Boys Season 2 ended with Stormfront becoming Stump-front. We have Homelander who got blackmailed by Queen Maeve with the footage from the airplane back from S1. We have Starlight & A- Train back in the Seven. However, the most important part is how both Vought & Homelander are completely screwed in the public eye. As we know in S2, Homelander was getting boo-ed by the public for indulging in war crimes. Now Stormfront's Nazi reveal should have some serious repercussions. The public people might boycott Vought because of their alleged ties with a literal Nazi. Homelander might not get the same love & respect in the public because he had love affair with her. We also have a Federal Bureau of Supe Affairs to keep Vought into check by Victoria Neumann, who is also a supe but thats not the point. The point is Vought needs a good PR to get themselves out of this mess.

Enter- Soldier Boy

Now there is a common theory that Vought must have kept him in some kind of facility & have him trapped. This is a very good possibility since that will mean that he is basically has no idea about the modern world. During S2 we saw a statue of Soldier Boy which showed that he sort of died in the 80s. So it will be interesting to see how Vought brings Soldier Boy back in the public eye.

Now Soldier Boy coming back to Vought can help them with Good PR. I mean who better than a Supe who killed Nazis in WW2 can help Vought clean up the Nazi shitstorm. He is the golden boy of patriotism. He is like a blue print of how they wanted Homelander to be when they created him the lab.

Another common theory that spread which was also kind of agreed by Laz Alonso, the actor who plays Mother's milk said that only his character until now never had something personal against a supe. We also learnt sort of MM's backstory in S2 which mentioned his father working against Vought & how he fought until he died. We have an idea that there is a possibility that both Soldier Boy & his father might have existed at the same point & SB might have something to do with his dad.

This can also be the reason why he vanished in the 80s & Vought lied about his death.

This also makes sense because at the end of S2, we saw all the members of The Boys seperated. One of the major reasons why they come back together is to help MM. I mean MM has been kind of a backbone keeping all of them together. A moral conscience. He is a good friend of all. So if he is in problem, the boys will come back together to help him for a change.

I am pretty sure that with Soldier Boy we will get to learn a lot about the dirty past of Vought & metaphorically, America.

Soldier Boy and Homelander

So first of all, Ackles' Soldier Boy & Homelander didn't have any sort of sexual relations. What happened in the comics was a sexual assault. That was Solder Boy #3. That character was a bumbling idiot, subservient to Homelander who got manipulated by him. It's also not logical for the show to have that kind of relationship of SB & HL. Homelander doesn't have that kink that is shown in the comics. Also, soldier boy in the show looks like has a dominating personality as opposed to of an idiot.

What Ackles is playing is Soldier Boy #1, the one fought in WW2 & as mentioned above, he is the only one to ever exist in the world of TV Show.

However, both of these characters have a lot of similarities. They are both powerful, egotistical, narcissistic, pathetic male superheroes. The difference is the situations they will be in. Homelander is currently in a problematic situation as his issue with wanting validation are bare open. He is emotionally at its weakest point. He wants to be loved. He longs for validation from the public which Maeve uses to threaten him. As he was made in a lab, he didn't have a normal childhood. He didn't have friends or anything. However, Soldier Boy was given Compound V when he was an adult. That means he might not require the same kind of validation. He is a very self-assured man. Also, since he was around in public life for decades, he has received love for years. So he not only he is physically strong, he might be emotionally capable against Homelander.

S3 might create a problem of Power Struggle.

Homelander might struggle to keep his head strong & possibly be threatened by Soldier Boy. Since the latter seems very confident, he might be able to take his position in Vought back. In the S2 premiere, we get to see how Homelander thinks of himself as indispensable for Vought as a company & how Stan Edgar shuts him down. Now think about how Homelander will react when Vought's original golden boy comes back & takes his what he thinks is his. There is a power struggle here. It's likely that Soldier Boy might corner him because of how popular he is in the public and how Homelander wants that same love that SB is getting. S3 might present a situation in front of him when a supe who might almost be as powerful as him & emotionally stronger than him kind of threatens both his power and position.

Soldier Boy and Stormfront

Speaking of Stormfront, Eric Kripke mentioned in a TV guide article that Soldier Boy had a connection with her when she was Liberty. Now both of them were created at the same time by the same man. Liberty was married to Frederick Vought but he then joined the Allies & injected Soldier Boy with Compound V. Now they are basically two sides of the same coin.

Some of this is from articles with Kripke's description of the character, some of them are common theories that have floated around & some of it is my predictions about what direction the character's storyline can take. This is majorly based on everything I have read, heard or watched. It doesn't mean that any of it will turn out the way it's written here. But I still hope this is helpful.

Anyway, I am very excited to see Jensen in this new role. I know he will rock it and I can't wait.

Some Articles I took into consideration -

[hacash]

ted lasso 2x09 thoughts

ARGH

those are it. those are my thoughts.

Ok, slightly more coherently…

Sam’s getting recognition! Sam has his own chant! I love that for him. Love it all. It’s obviously so good that Sam is becoming an in-universe hero when we’ve loved him from his first scene - however, that also comes with the caveat of not wanting him to move anywhere from Nelson Road. I’m curious to see where they take it though, because I obviously can’t see Toheeb Jimoh leaving the cast before the show finishes, but at the same time this offer is so good for him?? I don’t know I don’t know I don’t know.

(If, on the other hand, Toheeb is being written out because he’s going on to star as a lead in another show where we could see more of his beautiful face and stellar acting every week? I would find that acceptable.)

Screeners’ reactions for this episode had me thinking something cataclysmic and dreadful was going to happen between Sam and Rebecca with them reuniting and it hitting the papers - and it ended up being fine?? Of course she’s torn about him leaving. Even if they end up never being together again Sam clearly represents something wonderful to Rebecca - possibility and the sense of being treated right - and those feelings don’t just go away.

I expected a bit more reaction from Ted about the whole Sambecca thing, but that little look in his eyes after their conversation did have me curious - does he disapprove more than he lets on? is he secretly pining for Rebecca already? only time will tell. also I did notice Ted was once again basically saying whatever Rebecca wanted to hear and agreeing at every single line - he might be going to therapy but he’s not out of the people-pleaser woods yet.

Another bombshell next year? OH COME ON. If that’s not a prediction of some sort of confession of love I will go out and buy a hat just to eat it.

SHARON. How I am going to miss thee. But it was a lovely and understated farewell to a character that I’ve really come to love - Sexy Mother Fucker; he stole my move, yaas - showing how much she and Ted have helped each other grow and I just *tear*. Also I’m a Tedbecca shipper through and through, but Jason and Sarah do have such lovely chemistry together.

Also the pub regulars basically pleading for free therapy? Aww.

Higgins luring Ted back to read Sharon’s note with a well-chosen letter based pun? I love this man to the ends of the earth.

I FUCKING KNEW THAT HIGGINS KNEW EVERYONE’S BIRTHDAY. I PREDICTED THAT SHIT.

Roy and Keeley…I’m sorry, I’m emotional and anxious and hopeful and I do not think they’re going to break up. Relationships go through messy spots and people struggle, and the mark of a good, communicative, grown-up relationship is that you take time and discuss your issues and move past them. Keeley and Roy’s relationship has always been characterised by that maturity, and I just don’t see a couple of ill-timed romance confessions breaking that down.

(If anything, we might get a discussion from Roy about Keeley trusting him - I’m guessing there’s a fair bit of time lapsed between Jamie’s confession and her telling all to Roy, and I can see that being the sticking point that upsets Roy, that she hid this from him for some time. He clearly didn’t feel at all upset by what happened with Nate; it’s the - arguably fair - point that Keeley didn’t let him know that her ex confessed love for her that I think is going to be the issue.)

Also, the ‘are you married’ question - coupled with the fact that we keep seeing Roy on his knees in front of Keeley - makes me think we’re going to get a proposal next episode.

Also I love that we’re seeing more of Keeley’s psyche beyond the ‘cute and supports everyone’ façade - her mother’s experience with ambition and not being able to achieve it is a really interesting little snippet, not to mention the reason she bonds so much with Nate and is able to see how someone seemingly ‘undeserving’ should be able to realise their dreams.

also her and Rebecca’s ‘bleargggggh!’ competition! and Ted thinking he was going to be on the cover of Vanity Fair! return of Biscuits with the Boss!

ok, deep breaths now

NAAAAAATE

WHAT ARE YOU DOOIIIIIIING

Is it bad that I sort of liked the whole thing with Keeley? Not in a ‘yes I want this to happen’ sort of way, but because it makes so much sense that Nate (particularly Nate in his current state) might mistake that level of bonding and emotional support as something romantic. We know Nate is insecure and hasn’t had much of a social life in the past, and that he idealises Keeley for her basic kindness and decency: much like Jamie in 2x10, he’s mistaking Keeley’s kindness as something more…it’s absolutely gutting to watch, and also so human and real that I can’t help but take my hat off to the writers for it.

(Honestly, there’s been so many posts on tumblr about how toxic masculinity fucks men over to such an extent that when they receive kindness and friendship for a woman they immediately think romance - but yeah. this show does tick all the boxes.)

I did see the kiss moment coming a mile away and was really worried that Nate was going to be…uh, very entitled about it, given his current state, but the fact that he wasn’t - that he was immediately horrified and realised he’d fucked up and stumbles away muttering about how he ‘is worried about it’ and ends the scene spitting at himself in the mirror again and looking absolutely disgusted with himself - well, in a way that just hurt more. (I mean, I’m relieved Nate wasn’t all bolshy with it because his reaction does show there is still some of the old Nate still there…but still, owch.)

And then that text from Trent…

Next episode is going to hurt like hell, isn’t it? I absolutely cannot wait for the showdown between Nate and Ted, it’s been a long time coming…like I’ve said, while I think ultimately Nate is going to have a redemption arc, because thematically it makes sense and would send some pretty iffy messages if he doesn’t, I don’t think it’ll come until season three. Right now I just want to see Ted get angry after several seasons of suppressing his anger, I want a full-blown emotional hash-out between them both - basically I want Jason and Nick to have me sobbing before 9AM.

My one question is: are we going to see Nate realising what he’s done, or not? Was this a pragmatic, doing-this-for-the-sake-of-the-club betrayal or a blind, lashing-out-in-frustration betrayal? In short: is Nate Lando or Anakin in this scenario?

I’m very curious as to what show people who say this ‘came out of nowhere’ have been watching. Nate’s been heading for some sort of implosion since mid-season, and we all knew it was going to hurt some innocent bystanders.

I’m saving something light and cheery after all the angst, so let me just say: cinema has never surpassed, and will never surpass, the scene of the Richmond boys dancing along to Bye Bye Bye. Almost made up for the fact that they were criminally underused in the rest of the episode, and quite frankly this had better be redressed in the season finale.

and WE FINALLY SAW COLIN DRIVING THE LAMBO. I don’t know what I find funnier: the fact that it’s some neon lime green monstrosity that every fourteen-year old boy would have dreamt of owning growing up (should my new Colin tag be Colin ‘I Need To Rethink My Relationship With My Car’ Hughes, or Colin ‘More Money Than Sense’ Hughes? enquiring minds want to know…) or as was pointed out to me by @kamillahn, the look of absolute terror on Colin’s face as he begins to drive. Colin, hun, please just buy yourself a Fiat. It’s not worth it anymore.

[atlantis-scribe]

Mcshep as Destiel

first thing's first: this ask is evil. cursed. this is the kind of text that even Dr. Daniel Jackson, successor of the great Evelyn 'I-don't-believe-in-cursed-texts' Carnahan-O'Connell, who canonically possesses 0.1% self-preservation instincts, will not touch with a ten-foot pole.

no fandom archivist / enthusiast worth their salt would want to wake up in the morning & immediately sustain massive psychic damage upon seeing a notification like this:

understood? cool.

now that we have those disclaimers out of the way, dear anon, we can play ball.

let me preface my actual response by saying that my experience with Supernatural & Tumblr’s Golden Ship has been unorthodox, at best.

when spn first came out, I was a child, but a child with an indulgent father who cultivated my love for cinema & urban fantasy. we got into Supernatural wayy before Castiel was a thing. we watched it diligently as soon as the newest episode became available in my country. my dad would quiz me on the case’s salient points, and we’d talk about the monster-of-the-week & how it compares to the creatures in our own folklore. Supernatural was, to some extent, educational. heh. (yes, i was very much a minor. yes, my parents were pretty lax on the exposure to blood & gore. I grew up fine, all things considered.)

we stopped our religious following of the show around the time the Leviathan storyline was unfolding. my father & I loved Bobby, and we were also starting to notice a lack of focus in terms of plot & direction. the rest of my exposure then to SPN was courtesy of Tumblr, which I managed to compartmentalize thanks to my other hyperfixations with high fantasy & sci-fi shows.

BASICALLY, what I’m saying is that I know Supernatural like a kid knows their local urban legends. and that, plus my current hyperfixation on All Things Stargate, has been a cause of many a crossover & fusion ideas.

but there’s a reason I’ve been dragging my feet when it comes to actually making content for these plotbunnies (and why I have yet to include spn for my McShep AU series). it’s because the whole thing is bound to be chaotic.

(by the way, dearest anon, what the actual heck made you send me this cursed ask? exactly which blog posts made you go, “ah. this Kit person loves Stargate & McShep, and would absolutely know something about Heller stuff.” WHERE did i go so wrong??)

ACTUAL RESPONSE:

it’s sooo easy to have Rodney as Castiel + Sheppard as Dean. (bitchy, sanctimonious fandom favorite? self-loathing, repressed, & too-pretty-for-his-own-good green-eyed action hero? practically cardboard cut-outs)

but here’s the thing, my lovelies: Kit thinks otherwise (and yes, I just referred to myself in third person. “mentally unstable as a fox“ and all that jazz)

1. Rodney is Dean because while Sheppard’s Daddy Issues are more overt & present in-text, Rodney’s are closer to the Winchester Kind of Daddy Issues (in that there’s pressure-from-beyond-the-grave to carry on with the ‘family business’. in this hypothetical AU, it could be hunting, it could be science, take your pick, but Rodney-as-Dean has taken it upon himself to be the Good Son, and it’s 99.9% because of Dad McKay.)

“This is not what dad would've wanted.”

"Shared credit, huh? We'll do this together? Dad'll be so proud."

- 3x08, McKay & Mrs Miller

2. Rodney & Dean both have a kid sibling who wants out (who wants a normal life outside the family business, dammit.) really no need to elaborate on that. Jeannie is Sammy. I dont make the rules.

3. Rodney & Dean both have that one-track-mind drive to do what they think they do best, their only purpose for existence, to the point that they cannot see anything beyond that One Thing (science, hunting/protecting their younger sibling) because that’s how they were raised. their perceived Only Talent becomes their whole identity, and when that is taken away from them, there’s (at least according to them) virtually nothing left.

4. Sheppard is Castiel because of the gay coding. c’mon.

5. Sheppard is Castiel because grace & ATA gene can be metaphors for each other, and I think that’s pretty cool.

6. Sheppard is Castiel because they’re both Soldiers who rebelled & disobeyed shitty orders because it went against everything they are & have ever believed in. there was a fundamental disconnect between what they’d been asked to do & what makes them them, so they went up against The Man, and said, No.

7. Rodney is Dean because they refuse to believe in a higher power that governs everything they do. they tell the universe what’s what, not the other way around.

8. Rodney is also Dean because the only exception to this is Sheppard & Castiel. if the higher power (God / Ancients) had a hand in the creation of this Being, then maybe it’s good for something, after all.

9. Sheppard is Castiel because they share an inability to say no to this one person they keep having to save over and over again, even when said person’s ideas are shitty and risks everyone & everything in this plane of existence.

10. McShep as Destiel will have Rodney McKay as a stubborn & competent man who embodies everything good and bad about humanity, and whose misguided views on family & masculinity are forever changed when someone who is Definitely A Little More than Human chooses him as their favorite person ever; it’ll have John Sheppard as the Prodigal Son Extraordinaire, who damns himself & all that is holy because he just wants to save his best friend, this flawed human he’s come to treasure beyond reason, from himself.

[watching-pictures-move]

Movie Review | A Cry in the Dark (Schepisi, 1988)

The Important Cinema Club podcast recently did an episode on Meryl Streep and one of the more intriguing insights they offered was that Streep's portrayal of the kind of characters she chose to play brought with it a certain tension. Namely, if I can paraphrase, there was a certain dissonance between these dressed down, unglamorous characters and the fact that they were being played by the First Lady of Acting, bringing the full force of her formidable, carefully calibrated talents. They didn't seem entirely convinced that this dynamic was a positive one and worked in the movies' favour, but it is something that weighed on my mind as I watched A Cry in the Dark, the 1988 film about the Azaria Chamberlain case for which Streep received one of her many Oscar nominations. I couldn't find anything wrong about Streep's portrayal, but the fact that it was Streep playing this mostly ordinary Australian woman was itself a bit distracting. I kept looking for the seams in her performance, or the little dials she was twiddling with for emotive effect, and despite the fact I didn't find all that much, I couldn't help but be taken out of the proceedings a little. In contrast, I found Sam Neill as her husband much more convincing, perhaps because he was using his real accent and his demeanour didn't seem too far removed from his other well known roles.

After I watched the movie, I decided to dig up Roger Ebert's review as I often do, and found a competing argument in favour of her performance. Ebert suggests that the character is deliberately off-putting. She doesn't grieve as expressively as one would expect. She keeps putting her face out there for media appearances, to the point that people grow tired of her. She allows herself to come across as cold and snarky. Streep's performance seems intended to hide her interiority, offering us a peek inside only at a handful of key moments, like when she begins to crack under questioning during the climactic trial scene. The direction of much of the movie is not especially showy, but this sequence, with its aggressive cross-cutting and use of flashbacks, proves isolating in a way that the rest of the movie doesn't always manage. But the idea floated by Ebert is that the movie allows you to develop a certain resentment for this character and understand why the public turned against her, and I'm not sure that would have worked without the specific notes Streep seems to play here.

As for the movie, I found it pretty involving, if a tad inelegant in structure. This portrayal of a wrongfully accused character persecuted by a venal media environment and unscrupulous law enforcement invites similarities with Richard Jewell. I think that movie handles this dynamic more elegantly by filtering the antagonism more directly through its hero's experience, in contrast to the awkward docudrama cutaways that are heavily employed here. (That being said, Richard Jewell unfortunately achieves some of that elegance by slandering a real-life character to concentrate its venom, so perhaps it isn't the best model to take on the whole.) And I do think Paul Walter Hauser's performance has a greater authenticity about it than Streep's here, but that also makes him harder to resent, which would not work in this movie's favour. Also, I should note that having watched Seinfeld religiously in my high school years, I was perhaps less moved by a certain line of dialogue in the big early dramatic scene, but otherwise found that sequence quite gripping.

[cadaceus]

C2E140

Hello, everyone, and welcome to my liveblogs/emotional breakdown over Campaign 2, Episode 140 of Critical Role. This was genuinely an emotional rollercoaster, and I feel so much and yet so empty at the same time? These are genuinely my longest liveblogs ever (I had a lot of emotional reactions and things to say!) so feel free to grab some snacks or water before diving into this one. Spoilers ahead, of course, so pretty please proceed with caution!

- I’m emotional thinking about this very possibly being the Mighty Nein’s last Initiative ever...

- THAT NEW LUCIEN MINI DFVGDHJKLD WHAT THE 

- Essek tied for first in Initiative let’s go babeyyyyy I’m so proud

- THE VISION OF ZUALA  😭 😭 I DON’T WANT TO DO THIS I’M SAD

- The Eyes get their turn??? Oh my god

- Ashley’s aggressive “don’t you fcking dare” when the eyes point at Beau me too, me too

- Whoaaa Caleb’s Glaive method was so interesting, I can’t believe that worked!

- STOP ATTACKING ESSEK SDFGHSJK IF HE GETS NINE EYES AND TURNS AGAINST THEM OR SOMETHING I WILL THROW A FIT

- “Veth keep your clothes on... I will cast Marine Layer” FJORD LMAOOO

- I will turn into the “leave Brittany alone” person but make it “leave Essek alone” WHY ARE YOU BEING MEAN TO HIM

- six attacks versus Veth... ruh roh raggy

- Yasha attacking Zuala makes me so saddd 

- NOOO Cad... idk why that is the one that made me tear up, but just the image of his family beckoning for him in this city of terror is making me emotional 😭

- “That’s my child’s mother...” LMAO TRAVIS

- I genuinely just copied their “shaking weights” motion in real life adhjkdlf let’s goooo Essek!! 

- VETH IS DOWN.... GOD THIS IS MAKING ME SO SAD DO NOT KILL VETH PLEASE

- “He’s gone... let him go...” oof okay that one hurt me

- Jester was so close to getting that Divine Intervention... that was almost so clutch aahhh

- why is fjord’s method of persuasion to molly just flirting with them LMAO okay king...

- “’Remember the fruit salad?’” Fjord/Travis looks so embarrassed, WHAT IS FRUIT SALAD SIR PLEASE SHARE WITH THE CLASS

- Essek actually succeeding on a Strength check to get Caleb free despite being a weak ass wizard, and then Caleb pressing his forehead against Essek’s in thanks... yes I’m soft I can’t do this, my emotions are kaput

- TWO NATURAL 20S AGAINST JESTER.....

- Jester being insta dead. I am not doing okay. Like literally about to start crying, I was not expecting it to happen that quickly or at all, she’s just so full of life and if Cad doesn’t save her.... I’m just so upset by this 😭

- One of the “Happy Thoughts” on Sam’s flask being “Luc all grown up” is so precious to me personally

- CAD BELOW 20 HP --> CAD GOING DOWN ---> CAD UP AGAIN WAS SUHC A EMOTIONAL ROLLERCOASTER OH MY GOD

- Did Molly just scratch Lucien’s face??? Oh my god...  😭

- MATT YOU NEARLY MADE ME PANIC WITH THAT SENTENCE SFGDJKLD THAT WAS CRUEL I WAS ON THE VERGE OF TEARS ALREADY AND THAT ALMOST DID ME OVER

- Both clerics at 1 hit point.... everything is fine :) (scared version)

- CALEB WENT DOWN I AM NOT DOING WELL EVERYONE..... THIS IS SO FREAKING ROUGH 

- Jester clutch healer, not even joking, I’m so grateful for her

- I can’t believe that it’s been three hours with no break, I need to make a mug brownie to calm myself down, free us Matt Mercer (mostly /j)

- BEAU ROLLING TWO NATURAL 20S ON HER ATTACK WITH MOLLY’S BELT AROUND HER FISTS OH MY GOD POETIC CINEMA.... THE DICE GODS ARE REAL!!!!

- Essek using his eighth level spell on Lucien after he sees Caleb go down...... MY LOVE (also I wonder what he had been saving his eighth level for, since Matt said he was saving it?)

- WAIT IS CALEB DOWN OR IS HE LIKE DEAD

- okay. just got my answer. i am not doing fine.

- HOW DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS DSBJKDASL;KDSJKFDK JESTER YES JESTER YES..... OH MY GOD SHE DID IT I LOVE HER SO MUCH I’M SO EMO I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS

- Break? What do you mean BREAK? time to make that emotional support mug brownie though.....

- Caleb’s alive! He’s safe! Thank all of the gods!

- Yasha kissing each spot on Beau’s body where the eyes were... I love them so much.

- Uh oh, Caleb is going to try to revivify Lucien/Molly isn’t he? I know it... I know he is... but sometimes you have to let people go :(

- “Once you’re a member of the Mighty Nein, you’re in” oh no I’m going to cry then.... aahh

- Jester rolling a Natural 20 because she has such a good imagination is so fitting! I love her so dearly

- Beau’s appeal is going to get to me... I know it already.

- THAT NATURAL ONE HURT ME... I didn’t want Molly to come back (because sometimes it is time and they died saving the people they loved) but it still hurts, you know? To not get Molly back.

- ASHLEY;S VOICE BROKE ME... damn I was holding in my tears, but her voice when she said “there’s nothing else to do?” really got to me

- Molly being laid to rest at the Blooming Grove is so poetic, I love that

- Essek’s voice is going to get to me.... also Fjord’s “use your anger and let it fuel you” makes me think that he is speaking to his own younger self... GOD Fjord is going to make me cry

- When he said “Caleb Widogast, have you ever accepted defeat?” I was unironically waiting for a love confession

- WAIT NO WAY..... HOLY SHIT???

- DID CADUCEUS JUST ROLL A 2 PERCENT.... WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING 

- Marisha talking about the “emotional whiplash” no LITERALLY Ms Ray I understand you

- MOLLY IS BACK?????

- Matt turning to Taliesin and saying “Your eyes open for the first time in a long time” oh my god.......

- Empty. Love.

- Molly turning to Yasha and saying “Love” is so precious, I love and missed their friendship so so much

- I know I wasn’t sold on Molly coming back, but honestly this is very fitting and I love it a lot. It makes me so emotional, dear god... all of the Mighty Nein together for the first time literally ever. 😭

- “Long May He Reign” is trending on Twitter right now. I think you all know why.

- Wow, I genuinely didn’t cry this entire episode but the second is ended something in me just broke. I feel a bit speechless right now and my emotions are all over the place, but if you read all of these liveblogs please know that you are loved and valued more than you could possibly know. I love you, I love you, I love you; and is it Thursday yet? 

<3