#karkat would be proud

[calicorobin]

guys who sit in front of you at the theater and talk during the entire duration of the movie

[ahogettena]

kat and dani

aka transfem nonbinary davekat 4 my au

they/them 4 dani/dave and she/they 4 karkat plzzz

also believe it or not i actually used 2 be a DIEHARD davekat hater

[hs-transfusion]

For fun, here's some trivia for each of the trolls.

Gamzee is passively aware of the fourth wall. He doesn't make a big deal out of it though, so nobody really knows about it.

Vriska's lower-grade arm was inspired by Be The Lowblood, though while that iteration of Vriska still had fingers, Vriska's completely singlehanded here.

Eridan capitalises words with W or V in them to show how proud he is of his sign.

Equius' suffix was a reference to a chat terminal, but also maintains the greater-than symbol from his old bow-and-arrow. It also accidentally mirrors 4chan.

Terezi's quirk being 7's is a nod to Terezi's unofficial affiliated number being 7 (like Sollux being 2 and Vriska being 8), along with it being considered a lucky number. Fitting for the character that claims "we make our own luck."

Feferi might not make fish puns anymore, but she'll still glub it up when talking to Nepeta and Aradia because it's fun.

Sollux has two watches because that way he gets to keep his design symmetrical and balanced.

Kanaya's outfit is heavily inspired by her black-and-white dress from canon, albeit with sleeves and a high collar. Also, her vision threefold eye resembles a vampire bite.

Tavros' quirk is based on Rufioh's because Hussie has said that he would type like this if he were more confident.

Karkat's ancestor being The Great Uppercaste is a pun on uppercase, due to his all-caps quirk.

Nepeta, being a catfish, has catfished Equius into a relationship. I'm not subtle.

Aradia normally wouldn't have telekinetic abilities as a ghost, but her particularly vengeful spirit has granted her the abilities of a poltergeist.

[pointless-discourse]

homestuck characters as related to trans stuff

head canon

JOHN EGBERT

closeted repping tgirl who will likely not realize she's trans until after 16

avoids mirrors, unhappy with appearance but tries to avoid looking at it

gets dressed in the dark

once she comes out she's gonna dress like the most hideous anime girl for the first few months

like goes HAM

her fav nerd shirts paired with a weird fucking skirt but eventually it looks really good just because of how much time she spends on it now that she likes how she looks

DAVE STRIDER

cool cis guy that will respect the pronouns

will treat people the same regardless of transness

goes down the transfem nonbinary any pronouns route in mid 20s

unfathomably chill

JADE HARLEY

divisive subject. either cool nerdy tgirl or closeted trans guy

tgirl jade puts a lot of effort into dressing for the sake of mirrors

doesn't necessarily look GOOD (ultranerd furry island social recluse) but she looks intresting

however tgirl jade doesn't voicetrain and not only is her voice kinda clocky but also very hoarse from lack of use

closeted transguy/transmasc nonbinary jade is very online and performative feminine stuff until he realizes in his late teens he's trans

does not learn what trans is until late teens, very in sheltered parts of the internet despite being very online

was out online years before he came out irl

third option: chill cis girl who, during

ROSE LALONDE

terf

no hate to rose she is one of my top three characters in all of homestuck but she is very terf vibes

she spends a lot of time "debating" with trans people online (harassment) and frequents a lot of terf forums

i think that after a few years of earth c and maybe meteorstuck she grows past it and eventually to her it's not a fight she's proud to be the lead general of but a phase she's really embarassed of, much like her other silly 13 year old traits

i also really like tgirl rose, not for character basis but i think its cool and i (obviously) love trans headcanons

KARKAT VANTAS

i am very divided between ftm and cis guy.

cis guy karkat is cool, he's very much just some guy who's comfortable in his "girly" hobbies and, while isn't really tied into his physical appearance, isn't dysphoric and is just a little insecure

however: humanstuck karkat will always be trans in my mind, just for the persecution bit, although i would also buy ethnically-middle-eastern adopted into a white american family karkat

he'd be a truscum or just kinda shitty to nonpassing trans people i think, we've seen how many alternian empire boots he licks so conforming to the status quo as a pick-me minority is not above him

again i think he would grow out of it in his later teen years/early 20s (like in the comic) but i don't ever see humanstuck karkat escaping the eternal shame that kind comes with being trans

ARADIA MEDIG0

ily weird unnerving tgirl aradia she is like so that to me. she reminds me of the boymoder NEET memes i see chronically online trans girls on reddit posting

but also i do equally enjoy weird girlboss cis girl aradia

either way she is far too etheral to be bothered with gender stuff

like you could come out to her with sixteen hard to pronounce xenos, pass so badly you unearth masculinity/feminity so prominent it burns to the touch, and she would not give a single fuck. and she would never mess up with pronouns and shit

tAVROS nITRAM

i see her as a hardcore deep deep in the closet repper tgirl as like a core part of my interpretations and yet i can never imagine her coming out

like i just see her boymoding forever

not really? like i think it would happen eventually i just can't visualize it

hypothetically i could see her being one of those cool goth girls named lilith but it seems very removed from the original starting point

2OLLUX CAPTOR

repping tgirl or amab nonbinary or just plain cis

either way still horrifically greasy and that will never change

there is no self reflection that will even vaguely incentivize sollux to maintain his hygeine

:33< NEPETA LEJION

cis girl

maybe comes out as ftm in 20s? if trans, i could also see nepeta repping till death

like just a weird cis girl who is like "oh, you're trans? just like in my warrior cats rp discord server!"

again, gives more of a fuck about gender than aradia but it is close

she just cares if you will listen to her talk about her ships and art

nepeta is the type of person where it might take her a while get the new name and stuff right

"HER PRONOUNS ARE THEY/THEM!"

but she would be your staunch defender

KANAYA MARYAM

eh? nothing strong here, i don't really have a hc for her

but there is a lot of mtf symbolism in the comic and i do enjoy that

like a socially awkward youngshit who's not out to many people because she can't really bring herself to correct people in public but still has a really passing voice even after first coming out

bad facial dysphoria

do like her as intersex. feels right

TEREZI PYROPE

nonbinary

no genders, all the genders, new genders, old primal genders, everything

both simultaneously afab and amab but not intersex?

the living embodiment of androgyny

probably has a very long list of neos/xenos but is any pronouns

you cannot misgender her. hes too cool.

VRISKAAAAAAAA SERK8!!!!!!!!

transgirl transgirl transgril

literally not even a headcanon at this point vriska is a trans girl and that is that!!!!!!!!

if you disagree im kickng your ass so hard it comes out of your mouth. your days are numbered and that number is 0. (not 8 :( )

EQUIUS

option one: cis gymbro chaser.

he sleeps with trans men to steal their t shots

in the streets he'll occasionally say the weird shit but i know he'd be crankin his hog to futa/cuntboy shit by night

option two: trans girl

never comes out because of insecurity but indulges in long hair and the occasional skirt in private and then feels really bad about it

option three: insane roided trans man

t gave him big muscles and big sex drive

option three poiont 5.

racist sexist homophobic nonbinary

like drops the most despicable shit in conversation and finsihes it off with "my pronouns are actually they/them), like one of those nazi femboys

GAMZEE MAKARA

does not gaf

cis (? idk) guy who is fine with any pronouns and crossdresses for fun

i guess not technically cis? but still identifies as a man when it comes down to it. like barely guy

FEFERI PEIXIES

cis girl who is a little infantilizing

if you're transfem she will give you makeup tips

but still a little hugboxy

"oh no you totally pass even though you're 8'100 and have a full beard! women come in all shapes and sizes!" (not shitting on the made up trans girl here, passing is fucking hard and it has no bearing on personal worth)

JANE CROCKER

jane is a repping/closeted trans man and you can pry this from my cold dead hands

the mustache? the projection onto only male figures?

also i think its fun with jane's ties to the girls-only fuchsiablood club that he ends up a dude

also st4t janeroxy my beloved

DIRK STRIDER

gonna be honest here no strong leanings

i am a firm believer that estrogen would save her but i dont really think of dirk as anywhere on the gender spectrum

maybe just cis dirk? i could buy cis dirk

JAKE ENGLISH

one one hand i would like the transmasc rep being not restricted to hairless twinks and i would enjoy ftm jake that way

transmasc nonbinary jake is an insane concept to me but i do find myself intrested

a little iffy on the trans headcanons (especially transmasc) because a big part of the concept of jake english is that he's a big strong man who takes on the literary role of an objectified girl character and having him be

ROXY LALONDE

ex twinkhon femboy now BDD gigapassoid

literally one of the most gorgeous trans women you will ever meet

creating e substitutes in her laboratory since age 12

again not even those most immersed in trans culture and the ways of clocking would be able to tell thats how good she is

her speaking patterns hail solely from those cutesy minecraft/unboxing youtubers she religiously watched as a small child

however she is fully convinced that she doesn't pass for shit so she believes that every genuine complement and people treating her like a woman is just them being nice

she'll attempt to boymode and go "stealth" in scenarios where she doesn't want to be visibly trans but it fucking backfires because everyone assumes she's ftm

DIRK STRIDER

trans man with literally no basis because my dirk-themed friend is also a trans man

4channer transman robotics nerd dirk my beloved

DAMARA MEGIDO

transfem ig? or cis woman

very girl adjacent

idk i dont think about the dancestors much

RUFIOH NITRAM

cis man

MAYBE trans man

i am also cool with that

MITUNA CAPTOR

cis man

MAYBE transfem nonbinary

KANKRI VANTAS

trans man because very few cis men were tumblr "SJW"s

and he reminds me of of some chronically online trans guys i used to hang around

also hes very fuckign petite and girls and feminend and twinky dinky and im just projecting my dysphoria onto him sorrie kankri fans

MEULIN LEJION

cis fujo girl

when she discovered trans men she was like 'YAAAAAS MPREG'

will respect your pronouns and shit but is VERY HORNY

lowkey chaser that will also date cis people

PORRIM MARYAM

two choices: cool goth transbian or lesbian terf

cool goth transbian is the nice one. first off, she looks a lot like some transfem transition goals ive seen online.

second, cool feminist could also be trans rights and trans people are kinda forced into being political

third, being flat as a board could also be interpreted as her just not having tits (tho she does seem like the type to DIY HRT)

TERF porrim (correct): first, a lot of "feminists" turn out to be bitchy to trans people

second, her activism for groups she's a part of and groups she likes is good, but she really infantilizes kankri, and considering that's the beforan equivalent of hemoracism, if trans people didn't fit her motto she would not hesitate to shit on them

LATULA PYROPE

cis girl. maybe she/they

ARANEA SERKET:

trans girl serkets trans girl serkets

would also buy cis girl that makes you wonder if she's actually a repressed ftm because some of her actions are a littttttttle suspicious

HORRUS ZAHHAK

cis man who ends up hanging out with a lot of trans women anyway due to shared intrests in hyperpop and furry stuff

again very respectful, very small chance that he's chaser-y

KURLOZ MAKARA

i honestly do not know and this isnt because i dont really care about his character, it just evades me

transcends gender

could be cis woman, fuck if i know. i'd buy that

all and neither a gender above our human comprehension

CRONUS AMPORA

trans man that proves tboys are real men because they can be just as creepy and awful as cis men

thinks him being trans means he's immune to all types of discrimination

uses it a pity point/to get out of stuff

MEENAH PEIXIES

maybe tgirl? idk

may just be cis

possibly transmasc nonbinary

tho i lean mostly towards cis woman whos gnc and actually cool with trans peopel (be aware she will still groom them tho)

equal opportunity grooming

CALLIOPE

technically transfem anyway because her body isn't sexed so shes kinda intersex

but even if she wasnt a cherub she would still be transfem anyway

chronically online transgirl who spends most of her time in internet spaces with cis girls of her same age

warrior cats fan

humanstuck calliope hung around the warrior cats girls since elementary and never left

CALIBORN

evil trans man

transmasc for same reasons as calliope

humanstuck caliborn avoided all female socialization because he didn't socialize and instead spent his formative years on 4chan

the nature of the /lgbt/ board probably gave him some shame about being ftm

DAD EGBERT and crocker as well, very similar people

cis man who is a staunch ally

MOM LALONDE

cis ally

she's trying? can't say anything more

will occasionally and unintentionally say some out of pocket shit about trans people she knows when drunk

will mess up the pronouns a lot because very scatterbrained

GRANPA HARLEY:

cis man who lowkey fetishizes trans people

straight but fucks non-passing transmen because he doesn't see them as men

trans women are some exotic fetish

if jade came out he would repair his ways tho

NANNA EGBERT

transphobic

not even a terf because she has beef with feminists

but again if john or jane came out she would badger them at first but her love would win out and she would change her views

BRO STRIDER

personally i see him as a cis man but i think trans man bro strider is cool and also an icon

DIRK'S BRO:

cis bisexual man who is cool with trans people

ROXY'S MOM:

cis woman who is in a fucked up evil messy situationship with a transgirl

will trans rights

GRANDMA ENGLISH:

either a. elder trans woman

or b. cis woman (a little nonbinary) who is accepting

does not know the terminology

"oh so you want to live as a woman now? alright, i suppose. i had a friend like that back in college"

HIC:

evil elder trans woman who has an illegal diy hrt empire

will sell out the trans community if it benefits her

grifter

LIL CAL

i dont know it s scary

[caligvlasaqvarivm]

do you think Eridan would listen to kpop ? (either the human or Troll variant)

if not...then which troll would be the most likely to :3c

LOL no way, he's a hipster. KPop is mainstream as hell; if anything, he'd have disdain for it (and for pop as a whole). One of the less emotionally perturbed trolls would probably enjoy that stuff, though I don't know that I'd call any of the Alternian crew the kind who'd consider it to be their favorite, since nearly all of them are at least a little alt in some way, and kpop (and idol culture as a whole) is heavily tied up in politics, propaganda, capitalism, and consumption - so the troll version of it would be that times a thousand.

I'd say Feferi, Gamzee, and Kanaya probably quite like it because they're most at ease with their society, but it's not their favorite. Equius probably sees it as being aimed at the lower castes, and therefore crass and beneath him. Everyone else would probably get the propaganda vibes and dislike it on principle, even if some of them might secretly find some songs catchy (cough Karkat cough).

If you want to get into Beforan trolls, haha, oh man. I think more of them would like it than not.

Normally, I'd say that Eridan would at least make a show of liking it, given how much he makes a show of being a Sea Dweller(TM), but his hipster tastes, like his interest in magic, don't appear to be things he can shake. Karkat even calls him a hipster, so you KNOW he's out here dissing Trollor Swift and making disdainful faces when people bring up Troll Marvel.

I have as a selection of bands for Eridan Have a Nice Life (post-rock/post-punk/shoegaze), Sprain (noise rock/experimental rock), and Tool (alternative metal/art rock/progressive rock). Generally, I find he vibes with stuff on the darker side of post/prog rock, or the more lyrical side of heavy metal - both in terms of themes (lots of darker topics, like death, murder, suicide, child abuse, etc.) and in terms of sound. It also fulfills the requirement of being "hipster" by nature. Eridan is a very troubled, angry, violent guy, and I personally like to call the linked bands "angry man music". Just a smattering of lyrics for those who don't want to listen:

I've been doing a lot of damned things without you And all the damned things I do confound you Yeah, Satan and his devils try to take my hand And the angels on my shoulders try to tell me that they understand Oh well, oh well

Imagine this: I'm the guest on some obscene talk show In a cell of moral compromise The audience is made up of everyone that I have ever met in my entire life Every sin I've ever committed is put up on display by screens hung around the stage And we watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch The host says "I now present to you an elaborate choreography of failure!" The audience erupts with seemingly coordinated jets of jargon laughter "Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Shame on you!"

I'm broken, looking up to see the enemy And I have swallowed the poison you feed me But I survive on the poison you feed me, leaving me Guilt-fed, hatred-fed, weakness-fed It makes me feel ugly

I think even when his tastes do venture lighter, they still never really cross the threshold into pure pop. There's always going to be a hipster, indie, punk-y, shoegaze/post-rock bent to his tastes. I also list for him Dirt Poor Robins, Family Crest, Johnny Hollow...

Wisdom unearned is Intrepid and proud Till we’re dragged by the tide and nearly have drowned Entropy thrives In conditions enclosed Innovations arise When humanity chokes

Cast your heart to the floor, love Feel the sting, feel the weight Of a love, of a love not strong enough Your head's on fire Your hands and feet come off the ground Oh, sweet desire, when your mind, when your mind When your mind's not strong enough It's not that your head is gone It's just that your heart is on fire, fire It's not that the beat is off It's just that your heart is on fire, fire

Once when I was all alone I called you, and you weren't at home My heart fell like a stone, to the ground To the ground, to the ground Why, when morn had dawned on me And anger grew like ecstasy And Leda threw the swan on me and I fell to the ground To the ground, to the ground

Hilariously, this alt/hipster taste means that he runs up against stuff that's ridiculously anti-government; I personally like to believe he does actually listen to outright anti-fascist songs, but if you point it out, he's just like. No it isn't. So SWMRS, Silver Mt. Zion, Vansire.

Well, you gotta keep it up But it will never be enough No sonrisa teenage shit pop Well, you gotta keep it up But it will never be enough No sonrisa teenage shit pop Death to the motherfucking fascist insect This shit makes me so sadistic Death to the motherfucking fascist insect This shit makes me so sadistic Death to the motherfucking fascist insect This shit makes me so sadistic Death to the motherfucking fascist insect This shit makes me so sadistic

There's fresh meat in the club tonight God bless our dead marines Someone had an accident Above the burning trees While somewhere distant peacefully Our vulgar princes sleep Dead kids don't get photographed God bless our dead marines

So I convalesced in the middle west And fell for Ohio's roads I'm standing still by the windowsill Where I once watched the world explode So when it's looking dark in your narrative arc I'm here and you can talk with me A hackneyed fool under fascist rule Wasting days singing about his dreams

It's a pretentious-ass taste, but one that fits in with the vocabulary he likes to use:

CA: all of her FRAUDULENT MAGICS cannot come close to posin threat to my mastery ovver the TRUEST SCIENCES CA: an wwith my empiricists wwand i servve as the righteous hope that wwill incinerate delusion and the deluded alike CA: my holy fire is the wwhite fury bled from the wwrath-wweary eyes of fifty thousand nonfictional angels CA: and wwhen theyre finished wweepin they wwill boww before their prince GG: wow what are you talking about

I miss the days when stars were saintly They sang to me in ways innately Before we enslaved the symphony To playing anthems for selling things I used to wonder, wander farther Into awe, but those days were squandered My ghost was lost to the grownup gallows So I find my spirit in the bottle

Those modal masterworks Atonal oeuvres it seems When I ask afterwards All message lost in between The shifting aperture Depicting sun-soaked scenes I guess they resonate That's Universal Consciousness

Fate��s a funny thing It makes a victim of the will and brings a suit of broken bands A snake so full of tail That it can barely breathe to say it “doesn’t understand.” So, what am I to think? What am I to think? I’m doing it now At least I know I am At least I caught myself before I sent this out Into a stupid world that doesn’t give a damn Oh, what kind of fool do you think I am?

Like, I really can't stress enough, but Eridan is abjectly fucking miserable, angry and violent, anxious and unhappy. And his taste in music should reflect that, his feelings of impotence, his angry and anxious energy, his desperation. Have a Nice Life is probably the band I pick for him, because their discography reflects so greatly these emotions of anger, impotence, self-loathing and self-destruction.

The thing about being a hipster is that there's, the way I see it, three main reasons people wind up falling into it - the first is that they want to feel special, feel better than other people (not really Eridan's deal); the second is that they're just generally a music liker and their taste is indiscriminate enough to include indie stuff, too (and this is also not really Eridan's deal); and the last is because there is something in their soul that cries out for validation that they can't receive in the mainstream - for example, emotions, impulses, thoughts, and urges too dark for radio play (such as an obsession with genocide and murder). It's actually really important to me that Eridan IS a hipster, and specifically the type of hipster who's super pretentious and looks down on stuff that's "popular."

He has a massive fixation on being understood - complaining constantly that people don't "get it," that "nobody understands." This would extend to his taste in music. He would seek out genuine-ness, something grungy, something real, and unfortunately, stuff that's made for mass-market consumption must have the edges sanded off by nature. Given he actually gets upset when people don't "get" him, I'd wager that he doesn't treat media that he feels doesn't "get" him pretty poorly, too.

To be clear, I'm not trying to diss KPop in any way. It's not really my thing, but I get why people like it, and I'm not saying you shouldn't. Just feel like I have to toss that in there. I just really don't think Eridan would like it. And also he would probably be mean about it if you told him you liked it.

[thewertsearch]

Sometimes I really do forget these kids are thirteen.

CG: YOU ARE RIGHT TO BE DISGUSTED, IT'S MORE THAN MOST PEOPLE CAN SAY FOR THEMSELVES. CG: REALLY, CONGRATULATIONS ARE IN ORDER. […] CG: CONGRATULATIONS, IN ADDITION TO, JUST MAYBE, AN APOLOGY. […] GG: no forget it, im not apologizing that is BULLSHIT […] CG: […] I DIDN'T ACTUALLY SPECIFY TO WHOM AN APOLOGY WAS IN ORDER. [...] GG: are you saying you want to apologize CG: I GUESS

We’ve never seen Karkat sincerely apologize for his shit before.

Jade might not be in a position to appreciate it, but this is a moment of genuine personal growth for him, and I'm honestly kind of proud of the little goober.

CG: I HAVE BEEN TALKING TO YOU FROM THE FUTURE, AND I KNOW YOU DON'T COTTON TO MY PCG/FCG STUPIDITY. CG: BUT SEE, YOU DON'T KNOW THAT YOU KNOW THAT YET. CG: OR MORE SPECIFICALLY, YOU DON'T KNOW THAT I KNOW THAT YOU KNOW THAT YET. CG: SO I'M KIND OF PULLING A FAST ONE HERE.

Wait, this is a little confusing. So he's saying that Jade is going to be annoyed by the Past Karkat nonsense, but she hasn't been annoyed by it yet.

Specifically, she's not yet aware that Karkat knows it annoys her.

However, she made her feelings on the matter abundantly clear in their previous conversation. She's fully aware that Karkat's aware that she hates this Trollian shit.

Maybe I'm misinterpreting it? The phrasing is deliberately confusing, so I'm only 90% sure I've got the right end of the stick here.

CG: I REALLY DON'T KNOW WHY I TROLLED YOU LIKE THAT SO PERSISTENTLY CG: FOR SOME REASON DEEP DOWN I JUST KNEW THAT I HAD TO CG: EVEN IF IT MEANT DIGGING MYSELF INTO A HUGE HOLE WITH YOU AND EVERYONE ELSE THAT WOULD BE HARD TO CLIMB OUT OF […] CG: I, PRESENT KARKAT, IN THE CURRENT MOMENT, APOLOGIZE ON BEHALF OF MY STUPID PAST SELF, WHO IS ACTUALLY ME. CG: THE GUY TALKING RIGHT NOW. CG: LIKE, THERE'S NO DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THOSE GUYS, OK? […] GG: ok karkat, that sounds pretty sincere to me

And that, I believe, is a wrap on Project Trolling.

There's no more antagonism left in any of the trolls - or at least, they're no longer antagonizing the kids specifically because of the Mistake. Instead, they simply treat them with the same belligerence as their Alternian compatriots - and if that's not camaraderie, I don't know what is.

Project Trolling is dead. It's finally transitioned, truly and completely, into Project Friendship - my favourite emotion of all.

Yes <3

[myhedcanonicfables]

Confessing Gamzee, Karkat and Eridan

please, i wait your requests!

Gamzee:

He worries less than many people. At least because his religion helps him.

«HeY i hAvE oNe IsSuE»

If you refuse him, Gamzee will be upset, of course, but he will not sad you for long.

Probably, it's just nice for him to admire the good features of a person and be his friend.

And if you agree, he will eventually take on subconscious responsibility. He may be a relaxed person, but he gives priority values to close people.

Karkat :

He is definitely heistates. «SURELY. IT WOULD BE A SHAME! IS IT WORTH IT?»

Karkat also definitely does not like himself and expects this from the reader, even if he has always been treated well.

But okay. In the end, for him will be easier to move on. Therefore, it is solved after not too long.

If you refuse him, then this is what he was preparing for. Therefore, with prepared sadness, he continues to strive for common friendship. But also, he can refuse future friendship too.

But how surprised and happily Karkat will become if you agree.

Now you are a couple, so it's time to experience his accumulated experience gained in movies.

Eridan:

If we are talking about a human, then he will need to step over his pride even more and for longer than with a lowblood troll.

He is unlikely to idealize his love in ordinary circumstances. But he understands his feelings quickly enough

Eridan hesitates a lot in front of whoever it is in this deal. He's afraid of shame.

And he'll get angry if you refuse. Of course, he will be very upset, and he will certainly be much more detached.

But maybe he won't show much joy if you agree, he still will treat you much better. Very.. protectively.

But whoever you are in the troll hierarchy, Eridan will be proud of his partner.

[epicaricacyyy]

re-rating karkat ships because im bored and like doing stuff to keep me busyy

junekat: cute and silly!! i dont really have anything else to say 9/10

davekat: eh. ive gotten pretty tired of this ship but i just cant bring myself to hate it. i know im aloud to hate ships and stuff,,, but something about it is just so,,,, unhateable... 6.5/10

rosekat: proud to have warmed up to this ship!!!!!! 9.5/10.

jadekat: two of my favorite characters????? in a RELATIONSHIP????? hell yes. sign me up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 10/10

arakat: havent seen much content of these two.... theyd be very cute and strange to eachother... yes.. 8.5/10

tavkat: they shouldve hugged like... atleast 7 times in a row... and giggle together... and hold hands... and made extreme eye contact without blinking for half an hour 15/10

solkat: suree!!!!e yeahhh!!!!!!!! okayyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!! i dont have much to say about it buts its so yahhhh!!!!!!!! 8/10

nepkat: yah yeah yeahhhh yes 10/10

kankat: no!!!! noooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 0/10

karezi: someone contain them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOW!!!!! 9/10

vriskat: they would definitely kiss if given the chance.,,, vriska would be extremely enthusiastic about it 10/10

equikat: mwah mwah mwahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh thats the sound of them kissing eachothers cheeks mwahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!! 12/10

gamkar: man. ughhhh. this ship is just too much all at once,,, too much surrounding it... makes my tummy hurt. still too stressful to rate ?/10

erikar: the girls ever!!!!!!!!!! they would rate eachother five stars in fashion frenzy just to win together and then after they would go get taco bell or something idk!!!!! 11/10

fefkat: this is my NUMBER ONE!!!!! karkat ship. have to admit!! i have thought about them way too much to the point they just live in my brain and refuse to pay any rent... i love sunshine and lollipops girl x grumpy angry kitty girl pairings!!!!! they just feel like a breath of fresh air everytime i think about them,,,, 100/100

janekat: oh man this ship would have so many flaws and im fucking living for it 13/10

roxykat: fefkat but with a alot more sass and hanging out... love them in allllLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL quadrants <3 99/100

dirkkat: basically davekat but somewhat better yet alot worse at the same time but in a good way.... cant say i lookf for content of them 24/7 but im definitely willing to!! 7.5/10

jakekat: this would be so cute and SOOOO fucking funny 80/100

[chthonicarcher]

Can you draw Dave/Dove covered in bite marks standing next to a very proud looking Karkat?

I think Dove would be proud but Karkat would be embarrassed lol

[cure-typhoon]

Homestuck au where Karkat is stuck taking care of the wriggler versión of his friends and becomes a proud lusus of 12 at 13 years old

Probably the worst idea I had yet but also the most interesting one. He would probably explode in like a day or two

[laurasauras]

happy 413!!!

for this occasion, i have finally (after SIX YEARS) finished my dirkkat fanfic Prince of Grief.

this is the story of a warweary karkat who is being forced to marry prince dirk who believes he'll never get over his dead husband. neither of them are happy about it, though dirk is lonely enough that he thinks maybe a pitch relationship wouldn't feel so much like betraying jake and karkat can't help but get swept up in it

but things are not as peaceful as their two nations would hope, and as things go on it's harder and harder for karkat to convince dirk that he's on his side

through it all, there's a backdrop of complicated troll relationships, including several instances of outrageous pale/ashen porn on top of the concupiscent stuff

look, i'll be honest, my writing has improved drastically since 2018 when i started this fic. when i was rereading it to finish it, it was difficult not to give into the urge to do a full rewrite. but this fic has received so much love over the years and my priority was giving it a satisfying resolution

and if you like dirkkat and want to read one of the fics i'm most proud of, may i interest you in a high school au where their passionate rivalry over john turns into a passionate something else? find it here

[applestorms]

FUCK IT. DEATH NOTE CLASSPECTING. GO:

LIGHT: prince of light. both class and aspect are non-negotiable here. moon-wise i’m actually inclined to assign him derse, if only cause of the whole “accessing the powers of dark gods” thing (guess that makes ryuk a horrorterror? hmm), though prospit would probably fit better personality-wise.

L: prince of void. i’m quite confident in the aspect for this one, though the class is a little more iffy. having them both be princes feels oddly fitting though so let’s run with it. moon-wise i’d actually like to give him prospit, mostly just to be complementary to light, but also cuz it’s funny to imagine him cloud-watching in the piss pjs.

MISA: page of doom. i’m quite proud of this assignment actually, i think it fits quite well w/ her whole thing in canon about being loved by death (though here the terminology would be more like “served by doom”). prospit dreamer for sure probably maybe, to be honest i have no fucking idea how dream moon assignment works? fuck it, i’m giving up on that from here onward.

MATSUDA: knight of hope. again, less certain on class, but i think it’s very sweet if he’s a hope player <33 esp since his Belief in light lasts (almost) the whole series…

MELLO: thief of light. making him & light both light players is fucking hilarious to me so we’re rolling with that. also assigning him thief is making me think of vriska parallels now which is vaguely horrifying to consider but he did kidnap sayu and kiyomi so let’s move on quickly now.

NEAR: heir of void. take a wild guess who he’s inheriting that void from, fellas. this one kind of breaks my heart to think about, which i think is a good sign that it fits well. not much else to say, i’ve had this one pretty cemented since one of my earlier astronaut rambles on near, so…

MATT: knight of breath. as we all know, this bitch only shows up for like 2 seconds so there’s probably a lot of room to consider other options here. i just kinda like how this reflects his role in helping mello + being a pretty chill, laid back dude most times we see him, but i’m certainly open to other takes for this one in particular.

NAOMI: sylph of mind. this is incredibly vibes-based. she’s got that interesting mix of brutality paired with loving motherhood-esque associations that feels very sylphy/kanaya to me, plus an analytical approach that feels fitting of a mind player.

BEYOND: heir of heart. there’s a lot of aspects that could fit beyond, honestly— blood, rage, doom, and time are all other considerations that could easily work as well. i just like heart for how he mimics L, and heir makes an interesting connection between him and near, though i considered mage too. also heart to match naomi’s mind etc. etc. (you may notice i’m quite partial to good connections/pairings like that, even if it doesn’t fit the individual perfectly— classpecting is just as much a social thing as a personality test, in my mind. but i digress.)

KIYOMI: maid of life. i haven’t essay posted about kiyomi much but this one seems kinda fitting, though she perhaps interprets this title in a slightly different way than jane. someone go angst about kiyomi a little more so i can get a clearer read on her. life is also to match misa’s doom, as well as…

MIKAMI: knight of doom. i’m kinda hesitant to have two doom players on this list since they’re supposedly somewhat rare, but really, what else would fit for mikami? serving light his doom is basically his most notable action in the story, ultimately. guess it makes sense that DN would have a lot of doom about it, or at least it seems more like a doom series than, like, a rage series. in my humble correct opinion.

SOICHIRO: knight of blood. one final one where i’m more confident in the aspect than the class, but i think this one ultimately works— albeit in a very different way from karkat, ofc ahhakdjf. he serves his family, he works for the benefit of People. the tired dedication of blood just feels very soichiro all around.

[davekat-sucks]

Remember when Meenah called Lord English hot? This fact is kinda funny when considering Lord English is a mashup of young boys and Meenah has a reputation for going after characters way too young for her. Like damn, unintentional parallel? Would Caliborn x Meenah even work? She's into Karkat who parallels Caliborn in multiple ways but I feel like it would be in a more creepy way.

She really did say that in Openbound. It makes me wonder too which parts of Lord English she thinks is hot. Does she think Dirk or Auto Responder is hot? Equius? Lil Cal? Half of Gamzee (lol)? But I can see it being likely Caliborn too since he is the most like Karkat. I can see them being like kismesis. Like I can see them rag on each other because they are shocked to see that the person they grew up to be, weren't as impressive when they were young. I can see Meenah calling Caliborn a lesser version of Karkat while Caliborn just calls Meenah a fish w)-(or--E. At best, he will say thank you for her older self's services in serving Lord English. But in turn, she'll be damn proud of what her other self has done. As long as HIC gets to be a badass bitch, that's all it can convince Meenah she is awesome as fuck. And ironically enough, when thinking about Her Imperious Condesce working with Lord English to cause mass destruction and death to the universe....guess who Meenah in Homestuck 2 and by extension, Homestuck Beyond Canon, is helping for war, which also causes mass destruction?

Guess some things never change. Karkat is the new Lord English confirmed lmfao

[youabandonedthem]

Your name is Karkat Vantas, and you’re really not sure why you bother taking your dad’s calls anymore.

There’s a thousand things you could be doing right now, none of them exceptionally desirable, all of them more pleasant than sitting in near-silence on a concrete floor next to a surly Dersite. Even if the Dersite in question did take you in when you were a dumpy little grub.

Now you’re a troll. A dumpy troll. No longer little.

Spades Slick is sitting across from you on the cold floor of the hideout, fiddling with a baggy and some utensils. You keep glancing up at him, and then away; you know he doesn’t like it when you stare for too long. He’s grumbling something to himself as he sorts through his things.

It’s a beautiful day out. You could be anywhere.

He sits up a little straighter and squints at you, his gaze searing through you. Leaning forward, he sets a candle between the two of you and looks away before tossing you a little box of matches.

“Go ahead and light that,” he says casually.

You go ahead and light it. The hideout is already pretty well lit, so the atmosphere of the place doesn’t really change. If you were younger, or feeling bolder, maybe you’d have sighed in exasperation as you shake the lit match into extinction. You look around for a place to throw it out, but the garbage can is a few feet away and you’re pretty sure Slick will have words for you if you get up and start gallivanting about right now.

You stay put with your sad little burnt out match, and when you turn back around to face your adoptive father, he’s holding the spoon over the candle flame. It would be a shocking enough sight if you hadn’t seen it before. You know Slick – know him well enough to know that whoever this is for, it’s not for him.

He’s a professional, best in the business. You can practically hear his voice ringing in your ears. He’d bring it up at random when you were little, taking a walk through the neighborhood or heading back to your car through Wal-mart parking lots. At street lights, gas stations, sometimes even at home, if Deuce was so inclined as to offer him ibuprofen for any of his recurring ailments.

He’s no junkie, kid, he’s no layabout ex-vet or pregnant teenage girl hobbling around with no cardboard sign. He’s a businessman.

And he doesn’t get unprofessional with his goods.

For all you can say about your dad, you’ve never seen him waver on that.

He also won’t sell anything he hasn’t tested. He’s got a reputation to uphold, of course. Normally he’ll select a customer at random for this – they never protest. If he’s feeling thorough he’ll test the same batch out on a human, a troll, and a carapacian, to make sure a batch is good to retail to any species.

Earlier this week you recall him leaving you a voice message on Whatsapp, complaining about some particularly whiny disenfranchised Prospitan roaming about the place. You had kind of written it off since it had, due to the age and deteriorating quality of Slick’s phone and to the closeness of his mouth to the microphone, been largely incoherent. You suppose that must have been his first lucky customer.

Probably he’s going to ask you if you have any friends you can call and ask to come over. Your eyes glaze a little as you stare at the now steadily bubbling liquid in the spoon.

You’re not sure what you’re going to say to that, really.

“Sorry, Dad, I don’t have any friends to call. I don’t leave the apartment that you help me pay for except for to go to work, which I do at night, because I have issues with emotional regulation that make it difficult for me to do work involving frequent or long-term social interaction. There’s no one I can think of to invite over to shoot up for you. Not even for free.”

Without realizing it, your gaze slips off the spoon and towards the bottle sitting on the floor by Slick’s elbow.

The yellow label beams up at you, uncannily bright in the gray hues of the hideout. Mr. and Mrs. Bragg also beam up at you, proud as always to bring you organic apple cider vinegar in the raw.

You’re pretty sure you’ve never seen anyone on the street with a bottle of this stuff next to them. But then again, a 946 mL bottle of Bragg’s Organic Raw Apple Cider Vinegar was a clear $9.99 when purchased at a regular Healthy Planet location. Just the other night you were stocking some truly monstrous 128 oz bottles of regular Great Value brand white vinegar for a mere $4.67. So there’s that mystery solved.

The Walmart you work at carries Bragg’s too, you’re pretty sure. But it’s pretty nice stuff. Maybe they’ve got cameras in the Bragg’s aisle? Cameras in the organic fermented goods aisle? You make a mental note to check. Maybe they’ve been giving out Bragg’s at the needle exchange this whole time. You’ve never been – you’d be none the wiser.

“Kid.”

Slick’s voice cuts through your idle thoughts, and you sit up a little straighter reflexively.

“Sorry, Dad, I don’t have any friends to call. I don’t leave the apartment that you help me pay for except for to go to work, which I do at night, because I have issues with emotional regulation that make it difficult for me to do work involving frequent or long-term social interaction. There’s no one I can think of to invite over to shoot up for you. Not even for free.”

If something changes in Slick’s expression, you can’t quite perceive it. He keeps staring at you. He’s holding a needle, already drawn up.

“Kid,” he says, “You’re good enough.”

You stare back.

“What?”

He makes a face, dissatisfied with the way he’d phrased his previous sentiment, and wiggles the needle a little.

“You’re good enough to test this out for me. I don’t need any of your stupid friends.”

You don’t pull your arm away when he reaches out and grabs it, pulling it out towards him. But when you see reaching with his other hand for a strip of cloth sitting by the Bragg’s apple cider vinegar, you start leaning away from him, almost involuntarily.

“No, no, I mean, I can find someone,” you wheeze, already feeling yourself flush with panic. “I’ll – the signal is shit down here, let me go upstairs and I can call -”

“It’s ready now, kid,” Slick hisses, narrowing his eyes at you. “It’s a low dose, you’re going to be fine. Not like I’m going to sell it to you after this.”

He laughs shortly at his own joke. You don’t think it’s very funny. He yanks you forward firmly and leans in to tie you off.

You’re trying to think of something to say. You can’t run, and you’re certainly incapable of fighting – not while you’re in this kind of shape, not when you’re at this point in your life, not Slick.

He stretches the cloth around your upper arm and wraps it tight. Then he looks down at your lower forearm and frowns before readjusting the cloth, squeezing it even more firmly around your bicep before he ties it. He looks down and frowns again.

“Karkat.”

Hunched over, he looks up at you. You turn your head to the side, mostly unconsciously, avoiding eye contact. He’s staring at you.

After a long moment, he attempts again to tie you off. When he’s done, he pulls your arm directly in front of his face, staring intently. No luck.

Slick reaches up again to adjust the cloth, and this time, when he tugs at it, it rips clean in two.

The two of you sit in silence.

“Karkat,” he rasps. “If you do this for me, I’ll pay for three months of membership down at the Planet Fitness by your apartment. Whatever that place is called.”

“Okay,” you mumble.

“This is bad, Karkat. Droog’s been talking to me about this,” Slick continues. “It’s, it’s calories, and it’s in everything you eat. You have to pay attention. That junk food, it’s terrible for you. You’ll get sick.”

He looks up at you beadily. You meet his gaze.

“I know.”

He reaches up and claps you gently on the shoulder, the look on his face difficult to read. You’re reminded, as you occasionally are, that this is the Dersite that raised you. This, all of this, stems from a maladjusted desire to care for you, to keep you safe, and to eventually enable you to keep yourself safe, something you are aware is becoming less and less likely to ever come to fruition. He’s not shooting you up with Great Value white vinegar. He got you Bragg’s, from Healthy Planet. Because he loves you.

His clamps around your upper arm, metal fingers squeezing far tighter than the cloth had been able to, and this time, when he looks down, he sees something he likes.

The needle plunges down. To Slick’s credit, you hardly feel it.

You’re already feeling something by the time he’s standing up; makes sense, you’ve never shot anything before. When you look up at him, you’re cognizant of an unusual taste stinging at the back of your mouth.

It’s apple cider vinegar.

—————–

cool story by @myskyperevenge​  but not that well researched…

[dreadful-home]

Drawing My Homestuck Ships Part 2

Continuing doodling and talking about ships I like, lol.

1. EriNep: My eyes widened when the story mentioned Eridan tried getting into a relationship with Nepeta and we didn't get to see any of it. Since then, my head's been full of the possibilities. I hinted at it in my Meenah's Feferi AU, but I'd like to make an AU where Eridan gets character development by not being isolated from the group as he was, instead, hitching onto the Meowrals' dynamic. Think about it! As Equius has most of his attention on Aradiabot during the early days of the session, Nepeta 'gets stuck' with Eridan and the two gain a strange bond. Nepeta has a pension for picking up and managing pathetic saps (*looks at Equius*) so although he's annoyed her in the past, seeing him post-break up intrigues her cursed shipper heart to try to help him get out of his funk. Any stupidity thrown her way, she's able to bite back perfectly well, and at the threat of her leaving and him being alone, he would always calm down and apologize. Their spats slowly subside the more time they spend together (maybe she even sticks around his horrid world and helps soothe the Angels before the massacre really begins), and come near the end of their SGURB session, Equius is able to rejoin the dynamic again and makes an uneasy peace with his 'mortal enemy'as both are disgruntled highbloods watching their privilege being reduced to nothing. But with his new connection, Eridan doesn't think about leaving anymore. He's still mad, but not nearly as desperate. He's got friends now. And his connection with Nep only grows stronger when Gamzee snaps, Eridan is tasked by Equius to protect Nepeta, and he dies doing so. (May write the scene and more shippy moments in their friendship prior to dying later)

2. JadeTav: I WISH THEY GOT TO MEET. It didn't occur to me at all that Karkat was Jade's patron troll. I really thought it was Tavros! And I had hoped that his confession would bear fruit later on in the story, after they actually got to know each other better through the journey. Tavros really took it like a champ! It made me so proud of him :[ Maybe I should make an AU for it where Tavros lives and IS the troll to help her the most. I just think their friends-to-lovers potential was too strong and wrongfully cut short. They had a wholesome, supportive, and dorky dynamic. (And yeah maybe it would've been cool too to slap back Vriska's taunts about him being pathetic for being 'friendzoned' by having them be official later. They were good for each other, they just needed time.)

3. EquiKat: This stems, like I am realizing most of these ships do, from my desire of the canon interactions to have gone differently. I would have liked to have seen a rougher Equius that posed more of a threat to Karkat's leadership instead of him being all talk and no action. Yeah the bit is funny that he likes being bossed by lowerbloods, but I felt it would have been better to see more of the struggle of him not wanting to let go of his stubborn beliefs (and it'd help give him more reason to 'give in' to Gamzee killing him other than 'haha horni', that he was actually glad something was 'making sense' to him again).

So there'd be constant arguing between the two, Karkat getting especially vicious with the increasing criticism, eve having fun finding new ways to shut the indigo-blood up quicker just by getting closer to him, until enough time passes and he has the very disturbing realization that the headaches he got from having Equius around have been replaced with catharsis and clear-headedness after their arguments. Equius provides an outlet for him to get all his frustrations out, and after their big show of insults, the two are able to calmly talk things over, and Karkat can actually think clearly. He jas very clearly fallen into a pitch relationship with the sweaty horse troll. He's embarrassed, and the others jump at making fun of the situation.

Nepeta is baffled and miffed that he got into Karkat's shipping chart before her.

[birchbow]

Hey birch! Quick ask for your writing on POF. What do you like the most about your Kurloz and Gamzee? If you could pick a few favorite things or traits from the versions of them you created, what do you think those would be? It's ok if you skip, I just got curious. I love your epic clown sagaaa 🥰🥰

!!! :Oc oh huh! My favorite traits are almost always the ones that create friction--some of those are neutral but create drama and some of them are outright negative, lol. Short answer, PoF Gamzee's a reckless coward and PoF Kurloz is incredibly dangerous and proud over top of a deep well of insecurity. Long answer.....under the cut, lol.

The Gamzee I write is, and I say this with authorial love and tbh no moral judgment, kind of a coward. He's not scared of the same stuff as most of us would be, he's good at combat and he likes pain, but also he's hugely, deeply afraid--of lots of stuff, but especially being left behind, and that drives a ton of his characterization.

Being left/abandoned is a pretty returning theme for a reason! From the very first chapter, when Gamzee's internal monologue is basically, "Well, time for the thing that made me happy to Go Away again. Hopefully if I'm good and I wait well enough, it'll eventually come back." He's been captured on his first mission, is his family going to leave him to die? Karkat's cocooning, is he ever coming back? Kurloz is poisoned and the family is turning on him as a suspect, are they done with him forever? He's the lynchpin of the Cult of Flesh's heresy, are his gods going to turn their faces away from him?

And when he feels like he has been abandoned, he goes through cycles of rage and then retreating from the rage, because being angry is holy but being angry is bad and drives people away, but being angry feels right, but-- It drives him to be overly obliging, trying not to drive people away, and it pushes him to be vicious when somebody seems to be interfering with his grasp on the things he values. It makes him a very sweet guy who'd do just about anything for the people he cares about, and it makes him clingy and dependent and blindly devoted, and prone to lashing out when he feels like they don't care about him as much as he cares about them!

I identify with a lot of that as an author, but I also just feel like it dovetails pretty neatly into the scant amounts of canon characterization we get for Gamzee, so I find it very compelling to read/write!

-

As far as Kurloz goes, what I like most about him as a character is probably like...his pride? And (especially because this is a kinky sex fic) the shame that goes along with that.

On a very surface level, the concept of the Grand Highblood as a grumpy, proud old guy who's getting reluctantly dragged in the direction of a still terrible but less hemoist society is very funny to me. Make up a bigoted old man and then force him to knuckle under repeatedly to the people he's bigoted against. But also on a more-plot-less-humor level, a character who's made himself a very strict code of "this is what's expected of me and I will fulfill it no matter what it does to me" is RIPE for drama. Especially when the plot of the story is then giving that character something that suddenly he finds he values at least as much as that code and pride, and making him struggle with that.

The counterpoint to that being; it's fun to set up a character as a proud, badass, dangerous son of a bitch, and then give the POV/the readers a shot straight into the shit that he's hiding behind that "I'm untouchable, don't fuck with me" pride. Sadism, especially as extreme as I've written into Kurloz, can be an intimidating thing! On the surface it's part of the mask, part of the scary persona--but it's really compelling and interesting to me to then sidestep that mask and go into the roiling mess of sexual shame and religious guilt and uncertainty and self-loathing. MAN I love writing the Brother Immortal scenes, you guys.