#kamiki.. wouldn't have turned out to be like this. that's what really gets me. I feel this shouldn't have happened...he was a kind boy

[yuseirra]

It's so funny and ridiculous.. I was so invested and focused and pained because of onk, oh my god I was so nervous because of that series, and encountering/watching another series with suffering actually heals me.. it distracts me so much that, a lot of my feelings(pain) have been actually alleviated. I feel more at ease from having my feelings more spread out. I DID not expect this to happen but it has.

It actually works everyone, to fight fire with fire.. to attack poison with poison(以毒攻毒), it's amazing~~ old phrases are so wise

ah, I feel like I can still draw a lot of hikaai even if canon makes them turn out terrible with this kind of feeling, I thought it'd be impossible for me (and there is NO WAY they should make it look like a mistake that they loved omygod. what kind of story is that even????I won't know what they want to say with that;;;) but.. my heart is a bit lifted seeing how terrifying things can be in another series haha..seeing how doomed they are. Oh the song was really good.

I miss drawing persona fanarts too...it's really fun keep finding passion in different things, I will never run out of things to draw, I keep encountering new things. I aspire to do better and grow as I do too! 'v')9 I hope you all have fun with me!

[diditonceinadream-blog]

BNHA x BE CROSSOVER

Ch. 3

Rin's Hero Costume, Mk. 1 👇

Alright guys, we get our first look at the ExWire gang in this chapter. I made Bon's personality a bit more out there just because he has a seduction quirk and holds power over everyone else because of it. He's still the same genius, straight-laced guy, and that will show up in later chapters once we spend more time with Rin's friends.

-------------------

Over the days, routines were made. Get up, shower, get dressed, eat breakfast, and head off to school. And every day Yukio insisted on hugging Rin goodbye, while Rin kept trying to punch him for it.

Some of Rin's classmates saw and seemed very confused.

"Hey, Okumura!" Kirishima called him over. He walked to him, Kaminari, Ashido, and Hagakure. "What's up?" He greeted. "Who's the guy that's always hitting on you?" Ashido wondered. "Mina! You can't just blurt things out like that!" Hagakure hissed.

They were cut off by Rin's laugh. "Nah, it's ok. That's my twin. He's got some attachment issues. Guess that's what happens when you've got no one to take care of you but a brother a couple hours older than you, huh?" Rin rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "Wait, you don't have parents?!" Hagakure exclaimed. Rin shook his head. "Nope! But don't feel bad. It's better this way. Trust me."

"Yeah, no curfew and no rules." Kaminari grinned. Rin sighed. "That would be a lot of fun, but Yukio insisted we needed curfew and rules to keep us safe and under control. We kinda just raised ourselves since no one else could. We had to grow up real quick." Rin shrugged. Kaminari frowned. "Aww, party pooper." He joked. They all laughed.

At that point, class started. They went to their regular classes like English and Math.

§~•~§~•~§

Finally, lunch rolled around. Rin found his brother with his friends and sat with them. He knew Yukio didn't really like anyone but Shiemi.

"Hey Suguro! How're you holding up in the second hero course?" Rin wondered. He groaned. "If fuckin' Monoma doesn't shut his trap about beating Class 1A, I'm gonna bring him to his knees and it's gonna be painful." He growled. Rin laughed. "Shiemi, Shima, what about you guys?"

Shiemi smiled, playing with the little leaf-man she'd made out of seeds and leaves."Oh, things are going well. Everyone is nice. They're kind of noisy though..." She trailed off. "There's this one chick named Hatsume. She keeps hitting on Shiemi, but Shiemi's too oblivious." Shima snickered. They all laughed at the girl's red face. "H-Hey! I don't really know how to handle that stuff!" She cried.

"It's okay, Shiemi. If you find you don't mind Hatsume's presence and don't mind spending time with her, I can help you figure out what to do for a date and what goodies to give her." Shima promised. "Uh, no, I will. I don't trust you and other people's partners." Rin shook his head.

"Oh, so you trust the guy with a seduction quirk, but not me?!" Shima huffed indignantly. "Yes. Because I have total control of the guy with the seduction quirk." Rin answered. Suguro smirked and pulled the fire user into his lap���something he knew would annoy the younger, placing his chin on the boy's shoulder. "What was that about having control over me, blueberry?" He snickered. "Hey! Suguro!" He growled, elevating his body temperature with flames so the boy let go of him. Rin laughed at his friend's grumbling before he spotted Midoriya across the cafeteria watching them curiously. He waved.

The green haired boy blushed at being noticed and then looked down at his food.

"Deku, what's wrong?" Uraraka questioned. Iida looked at him. "Something is bothering you, Midoriya?" He guessed. "Uh...no, it's just...Okumura-kun and his friends. They look so comfortable together." He said wistfully. Just as he said so, the aforementioned people walked up and sat down around the trio. Midoriya wondered how they'd gotten there so fast.

"Hey Midoriya. Whatcha up to?" Rin greeted. The poor boy jumped out of his skin. "Kinda skittish, huh? He's like Shiemi." Izumo commented. The blonde smiled at the green haired boy. "Hello. I'm Moriyama Shiemi. I'm Rin's friend. It's nice to meet you." She introduced. Rin's friends gave their introductions, following her lead.

"And I'm Yukio, Rin's twin." The taller boy sitting on the other side of Iida said. "Hmm, you guys don't really look alike." Hagakure and Ashido had apparently made their way over. "Mina!" Hagakure sounded exasperated. Suguro guessed she just blurted out whatever she was thinking a lot of the time. "That's okay. I wouldn't wanna be a pretty boy like Nii-san." Yukio teased. "Watch it genius, I feed you and you don't know what I put in that food." Rin warned playfully.

"Rin's kinda snappy today, huh Okumura?" Suguro grinned, wrapping his arm tighter around Rin's waist. Ashido squealed. "Is this the guy with the seduction quirk?" She asked.

"Well, nothing escapes you, does it?" Izumo snarked. "Hey," Rin shot a small flame at her arm, where it sizzled on her sleeve. "Be nice. Not everybody is as observant and snobby as you, Eyebrows."

"I told you my name is Kamiki Izumo!"

"Ooh, cat fight." Shima grinned, leaning forward. "Do I look like a girl to you?" Rin turned to the pink haired boy.

"You guys are so mean to Rin." Uraraka giggled. "How is that funny?" Iida questioned. "Nah, s'okay. We know each other well enough to trash talk each other and still be friends. Long as no one steps over the line, we're good. I can call Kamiki a stone cold bitch all I want and she won't do anything cause she knows it's true." Rin brushed it off.

Except right after that, birds started pecking at his head. "Ow, ow, Kamiki, call off the birds!" Rin held his arms up in defense.

Rin heard a familiar laugh and glared at Bakugou from across the room. "Uh oh. I sense a rivalry." Hagakure sang. "I think Bakugou has a three way rivalry with Midoriya, Rin, and Todoroki. That guy's got some serious issues." Ashido added. When the explosive blonde in question turned away, Rin spit a tiny ball of fire and they all watched until it hit it's target: Bakugou's hair. Rin cursed("Ohshit") and ducked behind Suguro. Bakugou turned to glower at Rin and didn't see him, so he immediately got up and ran out of the room, no doubt hunting the boy down.

Rin came back up, grinning. "Nice one, Rin. Now he'll be running in the halls like a maniac until he realizes you're still here and that he just looks like an angry psycho." Shima snickered. "We should refrain from using our quirks out of classes." Konekomeru put in quietly. "Yes, I agree with Miwa-kun." Iida did karate chops in the air with his hands. Rin snorted. "Little too late for that, guys."

The bell rang and the group split, going to their more abnormal courses.

§~•~§~•~§

As they waited for the teacher to arrive, Rin heard running in the hallway and cocked his head to the side in confusion right before All Might burst into the room.

"I HAVE.....COME THROUGH THE DOOR LIKE NORMAL!!!" He yelled. Rin snorted out a laugh. It seemed like he would rather have come in through the window. Some students freaked out and got excited, some students fanboyed(Midoriya), and then some just smiled and laughed.

The Number One Hero posed in front of the class and began talking(well, it was more like shouting....).

"Hero Basic Training-The class that'll put you through all sorts of special training to mold you into heroes!"

He showed them a card. "No time for dallying, today's activity is this! Battle!" He shouted. Rin couldn't help but smile at the man's excitement. He seemed genuinely happy to be here teaching them, whereas Aizawa was more like a teacher that never wanted to be a teacher in the first place, but needed a job and just took what he could get.

Something slid out of the walls, revealing cases with numbers on them. Are those.....?

Rin grinned once All Might announced that these were their hero costumes they'd ordered. They all retrieved their numbers. Everybody cheered and headed to the changing rooms to put on their costumes.

§~•~§~•~§

Rin grinned as he slipped on his gloves and moved to lace his boots up. He went out to meet everyone else. Kirishima was with Kaminari. The redhead had metal all over his body and even across his face and Kirishima just had some kind of device on the side of his head. "Hey Okumura!" He greeted. "So, what's up with your costume? Going for the Assassin's Creed look?" Kaminari teased. Rin grinned. "It's all fire proof and it's easy to move in. Plus, the material guards me from anything like Mina's poison." Rin explained.

"Oh yeah, your quirk. What exactly is your quirk?" Kaminari wondered. "It's fire." Rin held a hand out and a small blue flame appeared, flickering in his palms and on his fingers. "I can breathe it, I can blast it from my hands, I can cover my body in it. My brother and I grew up in a rough neighborhood, so we made sure to keep our quirks trained in case anything happened so I can even control the temperature of my flames too, though the lowest I can get it is about 23°C." Rin answered. "It's so hot it's blue? Interesting!" Kirishima examined he small flame in tins palm.

"Wow, that sounds awesome! I can only do one big blast, but it kinda fries my brain, so...." Kaminari scratched the back of his head in embarrassment.

"I can harden!" Kirishima shouted excitedly, hardening his arm until it looked like rock. Rin stifled a laugh behind his hand. "I'm pretty sure every guy can do that, Kirishima." He sniggered. "Oi, that's not what I meant!" The redhead complained. Rin and Kaminari laughed, leaning on each other while Kirishima's face turned redder than his hair.

"Alright! Now that you have these costumes, from now on, you are all heroes!" All Might announced. Rin heard footsteps and looked behind him. Midoriya was just arriving from the tunnel behind everybody. Man, this guy is a mess.

Rin had to cover his mouth to keep from laughing out loud. The boy's costume was his own signature color, but it was pretty obvious who he modeled it after. Rin looked between Izuku and All Might and he could tell the Number One Hero had noticed. Midoriya, stop trying so hard!

All Might explained how they were going to work in teams and fight each other as heroes against villains.

This is either gonna be insane fun or a complete disaster......

[yuseirra]

This is a feeling I've been getting for a long time and it was actually brought up in 162,

Remember how Aqua was very depressed, finding no point in his life during Ai's funeral, but he suddenly started latching onto this idea that his father must have been the killer, and decided he can't die yet?

I feel what's happened to Kamiki may have been the same thing. When I look at him, with his personality and how mild he used to be, he really would have lost all his will to go on living after Ai's passing. He literally could not live with her gone. I really do feel that he would have followed her if nothing happened. But he's also like, "I can't die yet",(162) "before that(I die) there's something I should-"(147)

Those two boys go through a very similar thought process after Ai's death, they do parallel each other.

What is it that's made them go on living? Was that a natural flow of thought that they went through? I feel like...; with the lyrics of Fatal mentioning about the "darkness of the black star"... Something influenced them into believing that way. It made Aqua very convinced he should take revenge on his dad(tbh, the idea he had isn't so logical and it turned out to be really flawed. His dad never wanted Ai to die and he also got so devastated), it also made Kamiki go on living, but in a way he wouldn't have been as his original kind self. This doesn't feel like just a coincidence to me. Neither had them the will to live, but they suddenly turn pretty disastrous and aggressive, and keep going but in a twisted direction. The anime illustrates Aqua's change of heart in a very impressive way too, wasn't this when he got his first black star eyes? So what is up with the "eyes"? According to the lyrics, stars "dwell" in people's eyes. Doesn't this mean both Aqua and his dad got either taken over or influenced by it?

What was the point of having Aqua go against his father if this is? There were crows drawn in the anime sequence when this happened, why do I feel like Tsukuyomi may have to do with this? I do get the idea that she wanted Kamiki gone although that's not an idea with a solid base, I do believe she wanted Aqua to go through with the revenge and thus help out with the movie and advise him and Ruby regarding destiny though. She's also the one who told Ruby about Kamiki having been near the hospital with Ryosuke but that's...different from what he says himself. I believe his testimony on that because why would he hang with a murderer that killed the doc who helped deliver his children for years?;; It doesn't make sense. That's why I felt so relieved when that part about Gorou came up. Aqua doesn't really refute that idea in a strong way either, if he's the one that's murdered his past self, I think he should have reacted more towards it? It's like that time how Aqua didn't react as much when Kamiki said he killed Ai. If that were to be the truth, it should really have invoked a stronger type of reaction within him. Instead, he moves on to talk about Ruby. It's actually pretty similar to how things played out in 154, the way he just went on to show him Ai's video even after a statement like that. Aqua is like that BECAUSE Kamiki isn't responsible for Gorou's death, in a clear way at least. But he still doesn't believe his intent and deems he wants to kill people, he must be that evil person who manipulated people.

Tsukuyomi is the one other person who brings forth that idea, I'm not saying she's EVIL, but I do believe she has a strong idea of what Kamiki is as an individual. I guess I need more bits and pieces, but I wonder what her true motives are. There's still this idea of a god who loves absurdity and unreasonableness, and I think that one should be important seeing how absurd the things in this manga can get sometimes. The closest thing I see in the manga that's like it seems like "the black star", and it's only reasonable to tie something that's already been discussed instead of something entirely new if they're going to mention of an entity that significant.. From what I see, the stars do seem to grant its users some type of effect and powers. That's what they're starting to finally touch in ch 160 and it's really about time;;

Does Tsukuyomi have to do with one, then? At least, she should know about it to some degree since she's the "god".

This post can't have a conclusion because nothing is left explained so well but, maybe we can get there if we look into this strongly enough.

[yuseirra]

I was drawing something about Ruby and how she'd be feeling but while I was jotting things down, it made me think: is it really worth it?

I mean even the writers just brushed it off.

She lost a family member and the story handles it with a bystander going she cried a lot but she overcame it with friends, and started shining, became everyone's idol! She's truly someone sent by a god to bring light to darkness! In a few panels

That's it.

They could have had this same idea going but illustrated it with some depth into it. She lost her TWIN. Someone who she lived with all her life right beside her! And he was someone who she had a very unique and special type of bond with over the span of not just one life but two. But Aqua's presence and significance is just nonexistent in the final chapter. What he meant to Ruby was huge and it's not illustrated very well because Ruby doesn't get to speak for herself in the last chapter.

If that's what the authors deem is for the best, then what is the point of me trying to make it out? They clearly don't want to share it so much in depth even when they have the skills to, so this is what they want to do with their work and handle Ruby. I think this is coined this way to portray the nature of how idols "appear" as. Ruby isn't... Handled like a human being in the last chapter or the past several chapters actually. I'm not even sure if Aqua understood her well because he viewed her very idealistically the way he described her. Yeah.. Ruby did turn out the way Aqua described her as but that's how she appears outwardly. It's her shell. So sending out love is a role of hers now huh? But where is her personality as a person? She gives out love to people but... That can be achieved through anyone who has those "eyes" or "talent" isn't it? It actually doesn't have to be Ruby or herself as a person if it's about the eyes, it's more about the ability? You can put out a pretty doll out there and if it's charming enough, wouldn't it achieve the same effect?

I liked the movie arc a lot because it showed Ai was a human being but people wished her to be a cute, perfect and a convenient doll that could love anyone. Isn't THAT exactly what Ruby's become in the end? I didn't really take Ruby to be that way but the ending makes it seems like she's worshipped for a shell she's developed. It doesn't feel genuine. And I think that's intentional so why... What point does the author want to make about this industry~~~ Ai sends out a way better message in terms of what an idol goes through!!! This is so unfair to Ruby!!!

Everything Kamiki said was so right I just. Everything played out the way he said it would. People don't see Ruby as a person, the same way it was like for Ai. Ai wanted her truth to be out there though!! Ruby isn't following her mom's legacy~~~ I went oh he had insight!! He knew what was going to happen to his daughter!! He saw the same thing happen to Ai of course he would have. Aqua should have stayed beside Ruby and cheered her on. There is no point. On everything. Kamiki SAID he should go watch Ruby's journey as an idol? Doesn't that mean!!! He'd have let her live through it!! Dunk him later then!! Or is it that Aqua wouldn't be able to find him later? Honestly I really think!! The guy tried to bring back Ai, that was what he was gonna do- considering mephisto and fatal's lyric I feel the guy was going to die anyway even without Aqua having taken those measures??? He doesn't seem like he had a will to live ANYWAY but sure, Aqua sure. take your dear life along with him. This isn't explained.

It does make me think: why should I care about a work the author has dropped...how can this writing be something that isn't ditched. Let's face it, it is. That's the sad part. If I could feel the author did their best within the abilities they have, I'd still feel it's loved. But I'm not sure if they care for their own work?;; what's the point on trying to work with something the writers themselves don't care for?; I want to be convinced they do. But it's pretty hard to believe so. You have to love what you create or have some sort of passion in it to get it across to people. I couldn't really feel it in the end. So despite the art being very good.. I can't feel so much about it and it doesn't really give out a better message than it already did in the beginning of the series either. That's quite saddening. I hope they don't do something like this ever again in the pieces they write in the future, I'm not going to follow them because it's too risky to follow an artist who does this about their piece, regardless of how talented they are.

[yuseirra]

**onk spoilers** wow I'm so sorry, I have to let my thoughts out, I can't shut up about this, I really can't contain my feelings about what I saw??? Hm?? there is something that really gets on my nerves now that I think of it.

There's something that really bugs me from what I saw, how can they make Ryosuke and Nino look like a victim? That's so wrong though?? I wonder about the rest, the rest may or may not could... look okay depending on how it's handled later (the fact that this chapter makes it look like Kamiki's somehow triggered them to kill Ai and Gorou's really problematic and it does irk me out too) but-

This is what makes me even more frustrated than the possibility of having a pair I love dearly being contradicted. If the story is good then okay?? (although I feel that ship is so important in terms of the plot itself? It's a pretty central one) THAT also has its own problems because I'd feel so sorry for Ai (I'm in this ship because he's the man she loved, that's the most important part of it, and I was convinced after my analysis that he isn't capable of having tried to hurt her in the first place)

But even more than that, how can their actions ever be justified?? Perhaps Kamiki's some god that makes people kill each other with some psychic powers? But why write the story like that? and why.. for what reason would he want to hurt Ai? If that's what he's wanted to do, then what is he working for now?? What are his motives? Killing everyone with the white star eyes? What was his past? Why did he have the white star eyes himself when he was young and when he's met ruby?

This HAS to be an act in my opinion for it to be considered as decent storywriting. The chapter itself is interesting as a standalone, but I really, really don't want to see what Ryosuke's done as something that was inevitable or under some divine influence that he had no control over because these things CAN happen in real life and blaming it on some psychopath that's somehow coerced you into it??? feels so wrong. He should not have done what he's done regardless of what the heck Kamiki's said. and it seems like he's only shown him a toothbrush Ai's left behind so what the heck?? Then that means Kamiki DOES have some superpowers that can make SHARING A TOOTHBRUSH a good reason to go stab an idol if you'd want to blame him about Ryosuke stabbing Ai. Because someone with a sane mind wouldn't do that. You'd have to be already really insane in the first place to try and go after an idol for having a boyfriend and had matching toothbrushes. HOW CAN SHOWING A TOOTHBRUSH, FOR GOD'S SAKE, BE A GOOD REASON FOR KILLING SOMEONE?? I guess that wouldn't be all, but isn't it ALREADY crazy of someone to kill an idol for having a boyfriend and kids?? The sensible response upon it would be like Gorou's. He took it pretty well??

And Nino??? Didn't she get a phone call from Kamiki saying they should turn themselves in? Isn't that what's made her act out? That's really different from being manipulated into stab someone, isn't it?

How is that supposed to work?

How can the writers portray them out of all people as the good guys? That part needs to be expanded upon or contradicted later. I'd be pretty angry if things really are how it's shown in 160. It's not a good story, while it may seem pretty entertaining taken at face value because it's SO WRONG.

That's why I think this chapter needs to be a lie.

I have my reasons to think 152~154 are the genuine ones, I may write those out when the chapter gets released or maybe not..while 160 would be the lie, but.. this is really unforgivable if the story is left at this. So I hope not.

Yeah, I'm crossing my fingers for this chapter to be the lie because.. it's just wrong. It makes the whole story look bad and the subject this manga is handling shouldn't be handled this way. This HAS to be a lie, or I'll regret having read this piece. It's disappointing to me for that reason, now that I think over it. And I'm sure.. the author would know what they're doing. You can't blame things like this on some single insane individual or a corrupted god, whatever. Those two guys brought things upon themselves and THEY have to take responsibility for the ugly things they've did.

I'll just bring back what I've written for my review of 159:

Aqua’s “revenge” has to be fulfilled through a movie because Ai’s situation was caused by the public’s perception of her.

If people had accepted the real Ai as a person, twisted individuals like Ryosuke wouldn’t have appeared, and Ai wouldn’t have had to lie to the person she so dearly wanted to love. If… If only Ai had survived, I think Kamiki could have reunited with her after the movie was released. Because people would have understood and accepted their circumstances. Ai would never have had to die because she had children - for being imperfect and human, as she is.

This is not a story about a psychopathic murderer getting back at his ex-girlfriend or just one crazy fan attacking their idol, it's tackling a much bigger theme than that.

So no, this isn't going to be about Kamiki being the crazy mastermind, quite the contrary. He's the one who's lost his beloved due to a societal belief that idols have to be perfect and flawless. He's the one who desperately wants to get her back after having lost her.

When I think about it, it’s really heartbreaking. Ai and Kamiki could have been happy, for sure. They really could have had it weren't it for this, I feel.

The public isn’t always so cold, so I think Ai might have wanted to take that risk…

I think a message like this would better suit the series, and I want this to be a meaningful story.

So, till next chapter drops!

[yuseirra]

The more I think about Ai.. She's someone who's always tried her best in the situation she was in despite how broken she was. She was such a hardworker, and she's always meant well.. She ended up having children in the midst of having tried to console her boyfriend who was younger, who was suffering intensely and wished to be loved(and he thought giving himself away was the only means for him to be loved because the messed-up environment he was in) it wasn't planned for the both of them, but she tried to make the best of it from her point of view. She tried to lift her boyfriend(who was the first person she's really wanted to love- and cared for very dearly)of the burden and decided to take everything on herself. She tried her best being a mother, you can see her always hugging her children when she's back home or swooning about how cute and smart they are. What's made me really sad in the first volume was her telling her children she wasn't a very good mother but that she still believes that it was fortunate of her to have given birth to them, her heart is in the right place.. You can feel the love seeping out of those words. She could have been inexperienced, but I could tell she really did care about her kids.

The reason she kept smiling and kept up a very strong persona was because everyone around her loved it. She mentions in the first volume when ichigo talks about the dome, she pretends to be happy because everyone is. She's a very caring person, just.. really hurt and awkward from reasons that I don't think is entirely her fault. She's pretty keen on how other people perceive her as well, so she was pretty self-conscious on how she's been perceived by her companions too.. They didn't always treat her well(they are all teens, to be fair) But she tried to love them in the ways she could.

Ai didn't think she knew love, and was always worried about how genuine it'd be when she laid it out, but she WAS a very loving person all her life.

Other than her "love" I think her most significant trait is that she never gave up. She actually saved her boyfriend from an abuser while she was only a teenager herself. She became an idol and worked vigorously to reach the top. She raised her children with care and they grew up to be talented. She tried to figure what love is and it did come true. And now we even find that she's NEVER given up on her boyfriend and was always concerned about his sake. The song idol screams DETERMINATION. Ai isn't perfect, but she always had that drive to claim and get what she wanted.

So I think she'll be able to make her wishes come true. She's a literal "star" and I actually think stars may have some godly powers in this comic. I reread parts of it recently, and it seems like Ruby and Kamiki has something up with them that lets them get what they want or change the situation they're in with some bizarre powers they have. For example, Goro's body was discovered IMMEDIATELY as Ruby wished to meet him again. Her career suddenly starts to thrive when she sets her heart into it(and Ruby herself literally SAYS she must be favored by the gods when Aqua confronts about how cruel she's become in order to reach the top). What kamiki says to people seemed to lead to disasters he himself could not really predict, but it did end up making the people who made him suffer in some way, suffer back in return like some sort of monkey's paw. I think those two have some sort of powers or is favored by the gods.. And Ai herself was mentioned to be favored by the entertainment god too, that was something that was brought up really early in the series. I wonder about Aqua but he's the main protag and it wouldn't make the story feel so convincing if he utilized those sort of powers to get things turn to his favor. I'm digressing a bit but I feel like the star eyes have to do with the gods and appear in those whom they favor or something.. And that there are at least two different ones, white and black that grant the user different effects :/ the one kamiki has in that case is probably really capricious and powerful as that.

Back to Ai, I think she also has it in her to make her wishes come true in the end. I believe that her efforts won't be futile, she'll end up protecting everyone she cares about, and like what Tsukuyomi's said.. She may be always watching them as a "star". Stars are important in this story. It'd be interesting if the job "star" and the "stars" in the sky actually have some connection to another. It'd be clever in my opinion.

Since we now know what her wish is (there's one more video she's left to Ruby and I'm speculating that it has to do with the love she had towards her fans-that'd tie so well with her song IDOL), I'd like to see what resolution it'll have. I want to support and root for her because she's a hardworker. A true idol!

[yuseirra]

Onk spoilers*****

I had people contact me about 159 and GUYS...you have to trust this guy who Ai's loved with all her heart. Think about the songs...he doesn't regard his own life very high. He'd do ANYTHING, he'd lie with all his might, he's a liar... If that means he can bring her back. That's what he's trying to do and Aqua is there trying to prevent him from doing so.

Hehe more in the read more: I will have to see the actual chapter in full but here's what I think from what I picked up:

And it really DOES seem like.. Kamiki didn't play a part in Ai's murder. It REALLY was nino and ryosuke and they were the ones who collaborated. This means, Kamiki really could have just had the address slip out by pure mistake and that had a butterfly effect, making him feel guilty about everything. I honestly wouldn't take it any other way if I were to ship Ai and him together and I'd been drawing things all along with that as the basis. He's just like Aqua who's trapped in guilt for things he isn't so responsible for.

Yesterday I wrote a soft, tender and melancholic post as an analysis and what I picked up today (I honestly still have no clear idea of what the heck is going on lol, I could vaguely make out the words people tell me-I may be missing out BIG chunks and I NEED to see the facial expressions and stuff) made me burst out laughing, it's ridiculous and hilarious, even.. But it does make sense if it's this way.

The fact that Ai wants to HELP him and how Aqua mentions he has to HELP him now all connects so nicely together. I think there IS a reason why there were scenes where Kamiki called himself a liar as a child. He's still lying, but this time, as the bad guy who deserves to die because he doesn't want anyone to worry or care about him at all. He's really good at it in a meta sense, I bet people are going wild anticipating him as the true villian and the final boss but think about it, what is there for him to even lie about?? The lie, I think, is the fact that he told Aqua he's a psychopathic murderer who tried to scare Ai for having dumped him, leading to her death. He didn't do any of it, and only said those because he wanted to be avenged.. He can't forgive himself for having caused Ai to be attacked even if it's not really his fault. He doesn't want his children to feel bad about getting back at him for it. Aqua's saying he's insane for lying about stuff like this for this reason to his OWN SON.

Aqua should not approach Kamiki like this if he's the guy that's hurt Ai. He's weirdly lenient with him. And he says he's going to help him. You can't "help" a terrible murderer, especially the one that's killed your lovely mother.

As someone who's been drawing the hikaai ship w passion, I have a responsibility to grab kamiki by the collar and kick his butt really strong if he turns out to be a maniac 😊 no worries. But I don't think it's going to be that way, actually. He's lying in desperation because he's found Ai really loved him back; he can really cross lines now if it means she'll live. He wants to die in her place, that's what I'm guessing. He's really similar to aqua in some aspects. He's okay about being regarded as a terrible person as long as he can protect the ones he loves.

This is perfect in my opinion. If it goes in the direction I anticipate, it makes full sense. There must be some way to exchange a life for another. Kamiki wants to go through with it for Ai but Ai stops him with the help of her children even beyond death.

And you know what? I was beginning to think wait.. Did nino and ryosuke date? After the latest chapter but I didn' t write that because there was no solid basis but like, that turned out to be true,

I'm... Starting to get really confident about character analyses when it comes to this comic, everything escalates SO FAST and I can't predict what actions they take, but I feel like I can sense what kind of emotions they have when they do something.

So if this isn't it, I'll be. Then I'll actually feel more relaxed since I'll be able to watch without getting so attached to what they will be feeling, it'd be unpredictable for me and I'll just watch it for pure entertainment, there won't be any more analysis I make that will...be right.

I'll still be glad I've read this even if it ends up like that, though, it's made me think about a lot of things. I really come to love Ai so much as a character, and from what I see, everything will be as she wishes in the story of onk in the very end. I'd like to see it happen and I will root for it!

[yuseirra]

Mm..; well, I went and checked the hikaai tag

I actually don't really look up the tags here anymore because I get nervous,

Um.. Um.. I'm sorry for being an embarrassment(I SURE POSTED A LOT...) But I found a lot of things worthy of drawing about them and there was something that really drew me in about the two of them!

It happens when I really like a ship. I enjoy thinking about two people sharing a very strong bond, having a deep attachment toward one another, caring a lot, I can go on about that and explore about it on and on. I never get tired of it. I've been doing it whenever I join fandoms. It's something I find very precious and these two had something intriguing between them.

I think...I'll be still able to provide more, thankfully.

My chest is actually lifted to a degree(if they're going to refrain from explaining anything at all??) Because I refuse to downright just take the guy as a monster when we DON'T KNOW how things exactly played out!!!;; why can't they show it to us?? The whole thing about lies? Covering up? Was that what this character was supposed to be about? Then ISN'T the public's perception of him what's WRONG because, he'll be known for being Aqua's killer when he ISN'T. HE DIDN'T WANT HIS SON TO DIE. THIS WASN'T THE OUTCOME HE'S WANTED, evil or not. That much is still clear. It's still unfair. If he's bad, let him face the consequences of what he's actually responsible for. We don't know. This isn't justice then! So, you know what. I am not going to take him as the evil behind it all. I could sense some kindness in him even if what's left of it's a remnant of what he's originally used to be. This wasn't a person that should have turned out this way. I could see it really well.

Nothing about what Kamiki's told to Aqua about the nature of the industry turned out to be wrong, did it? People flock together and they entertain themselves with stories, isn't that what's happened to Ai? And now it'll happen to Ruby? Gosh, this really does feel like a bad/normal ending route of a video game. What more did we need to unlock the "true end" and find out the real truths of what's been happening? Sad or Bad or Normal ending or not, however, the writers should EXPLAIN what's been going on still. What are they going to do if they can't do that within the given limits of their own piece?

Since things are so indefinite, I can take things as positively as I'd like, out of all the possibilities, huh? And I don't think it'd be so far from the real truth either... I don't really see Ai having fallen for some "monster" because they were smiling very happily together in their thoughts of each other. The positive emotions they had were mutual. He was so happy to be with her. That wasn't a lie. She wanted to be forever with him and he thought she made him feel alive. I think that's precious. Whatever they'd become. I don't think...Hikaru would have EVER tried to harm someone he felt that way towards. The guy used to be TIMID.

Oh this got long again but, since the series is ending there wouldn't be a lot to add about, heard there's going to be live action and Hikaru may get some scenes there? Seeing what the recent writing's made of him, can I..;; trust them to write him in a way that treats him like a human being? Idk, it's been so confusing because I was ALWAYS able to read out some parts of his humanity as he appears(I actually wholeheartedly resonate with the idea that the guy must have had a noble soul.) but they make the other characters treat him like an irredeemable villain that shouldn't be regarded to have a heart.

I'd like to think he was an essentially good person. And at least.. There will not be ANYTHING left to completely refute and deny me of this impression I have of him. I'd like to think Ai chose a kind soul to be her partner. What happened after she died and what's become of him...what is with this man? I can't BELIEVE that's still ambigious, trust me, I'm very strict about morals and being in the right. That's why I was so nervous. That's why I kept questioning. I need to know something in full in order to be able to judge something, it's unfair to do it without it being so and.. It seems like we'll never know. I'll never have to worry every week and question whether everything about him and Ai were to be lies. Maybe it is but??; I've come to the conclusion that their love was actually real. It did bring disasters but I think they really did care for one another?? Things could have been so much better. I think they really could have been happy with the twins and them having formed a loving family could have become reality, because Hikaru was never so hostile towards the twins after all except that one really freaky thought he had but HE DIDN'T GO THROUGH WITH IT. He probably.. Really could have felt Ai in a pretty solid sense if he did but he still didn't(no but what was really happening there????)

I can come up with some things. I'll do it, even if I end up looking at other works. Thank you for viewing my works regarding this couple ;v;)♥ I'm.. Glad to say they saved me some positivity left but that's not because the ending was good, it's because I already had it within me and the work didn't blow it out. I'll draw something about Aqua too this weekend because that boy deserves it. I have no idea why he couldn't just live unless he has to sacrifice his life to form a seal to kill his dad who can't normally be suppressed... Having him die... Really doesn't contribute to the story in any way the way I see it, I'd see if there's a point to it but I don't see it having any meaningful message with Ruby being how she is in the ending either. Her "growth" sort of.. Reverted back didn't it??;; so, it's better if Aqua just lives. Literally no one wanted it to happen. He himself wanted to live. What will become of his soul?? Tsukuyomi should take responsibility for having put him in that body and let him live a normal life!! He got caught up in other people's mess until the very end!

[yuseirra]

This is so weird!!?? This is so weird?? Fatal keeps giving me this imagery, the melody of the song itself too. I may be repeating the same idea over and over but I'm so convinced on this, hear me out, That song is literally portraying the mind of a person being driven into insanity, with it's.. ominous and confusing aura all over it, it doesn't seem natural, what Kamiki's went through. I really feel like something's driven him into insanity. I'm not really in denial or anything, but I just find it so confusing and hard to understand because what he is now is WAY FAR PAST how his usual breakdown would have been. It just makes sense if this is the case because he IS the guy Ai's wanted to save. and the songs don't feel... it's really only him that's brought him to be this way, this is a person who gets easily influenced. This is so bizarre. Does anyone feel this way when you listen to those songs? Mephisto's core emotion is longing and sorrow but the lyrics start turning a bit weird in the end with a strange conclusion that the speaker wants to become the one they long (this can be just an expression of determination depending on the context but if you look at what Kamiki's done??? I think he LITERALLY wanted to become like her by increasing his weight of life whatever the heck that is) and Fatal, well, that song has a vibe of desperation and something really, really omnious. I'd say that this reminds me of that one panel from 140 when his eyes started becoming black with this weird.. flow pouring all over it, it's a song of corruption, he's totally become corrupted. Why are the songs like this??

If the timeline goes Mephisto -> Fatal in that order, it would perfectly portray how this guy's mind shattered apart. He's been growing crazier, well, he couldn't stop once he started heading into that direction but again!!! Let me say this again, a person like him cannot become twisted in this direction on a natural level. He showed no aggression towards others as a child. IF HE DID THAT, I WOULDN'T BE CONCERNED OVER ANY OF THESE THINGS. I WOULDN'T NEED TO TRY AND MAKE SENSE OF THIS GUY BC I WOULD HAVE UNDERSTOOD.

This is just something I intuitively feel, but—

If the emotions are this overwhelming and filled with despair, Kamiki would have followed Ai a long time ago. That’s just how their personality originally was, right?

I really don’t think they could have continued living or enduring it—

But it seems like something kept them from dying back then.

Aqua went through something similar, didn’t he? Is this truly a natural outcome of their thoughts and feelings?

Aqua was also overwhelmed with such despair that he couldn’t go on living, but then suddenly, he concluded that his father was the culprit. The reasoning was weak… and that conclusion turned out to be far from the truth, but it led him to live for the sake of revenge.

Why do I get the sense that something similar happened to Kamiki?

The guilt and despair Kamiki must have felt were likely even deeper than Aqua’s. Given his original personality, there’s no way he could have endured that… He’s always been a genuinely gentle person. He’s mentally strong enough to hold on for the sake of one person, but if he loses that person, he completely collapses. That person was the foundation keeping his mind together. Ai was the last piece in his Jenga tower, and when she was taken away, he just… crumbled.

Even so, normally, this person would never harm anyone…

He keeps singing about how he can’t go on living, and yet, he’s still here, right? He says he can’t escape from the stage, doesn’t he? What exactly happened to him?

I really think something influenced him. It’s too strange. What is the black star, exactly? Whenever it appears, all the characters start acting strangely. Could it be some kind of deity or malevolent spirit?

It’s impossible to explain otherwise!!! There's GOT to be something up with that thing!!!

I can vividly imagine the feelings this person must have experienced, even if it may only be a glimpse: they’re the kind of emotions that you just can’t live with; it's too overbearing and painful I don’t understand how he managed to survive until now, with that kind of personality. If he were a tougher person, he might have forced himself to keep going even when life felt unbearable, but he didn’t have any reason to live, and the logic he held onto wasn’t all that stable, either. (And for him to hold onto it, he had to degrade to the point of hurting others??) It’s like he was persuaded to believe in something, just like Aqua, holding onto a fragile belief… It feels like someone planted the idea when he was vulnerable.

Shouldn’t we dig deeper into this? There’s something really off about it;; If he’d been strange from the start, I wouldn’t even bring this up, but this person was genuinely a good person. How did he manage to stay alive?

I have a hunch, but could it be right?; If the story ends without addressing this, I feel like it won’t make sense. Usually, people don’t end up like this;;

I hope they unravel the hints hidden in the songs.

Oh, they really need to, because I'm SO STUNNED.. from a psychological standpoint. I need to see the process, because he's too different. And even while being that way, the way he usually acts is still pretty...seemingly benevolent and kind, it's like a shell of who he originally was is coexisting with what's crawled inside and taken over his entire heart. It's intriguing and honestly, really sad to look at because he could have still been that person if Ai was there with him. The guy Ai loved is still there, but it's like... that only exists either within the outer layers as a frail skin, or lies only as a fragment as a part of his soul now. The rest, I feel like it's been painted on.

What happened to this guy?? Many terrible things. Yeah, people WOULD break. They would become insane, I can see that too. But in order for a personality to shift this entirely, to this extent?? This guy was on the extremely kind side and he just flipped just as bad to seem like a demon of some sort and I-;; It's DRAMATIC.

I think this falls into the realm of brainwashing or possession. Will I be wrong??? but this is like.. the only way for Ai's wish to make sense and become a reality...By all means, this guy needs to see a psychiatrist or get some exorcism. Pour saltwater. Perform Misogi on him. Something should be done because he's NOT himself. Well Aqua's dunked him into the waters-

but the song!!!!! it sounds like it means something!!! help, I need them to explain this to me because if this doesn't mean anything, I don't get it. I don't get what else this is supposed to be.

[yuseirra]

Hikaru Kamiki's character-analysis collection

160 is going to be a pretty powerful chapter. If my judgment and theories, interpretations about this character flops eventually, it will. But until that happens, I feel I can hold out quite a bit.

Maybe I can call myself an expert on this particular character because...there are so many others who excel with other characters already and I wouldn't be able to beat them to it, but with his case, I may have a chance because he's had very little screen time and the way he acts is very ambiguous and confusing. I put in a lot of effort into understanding his character along with Ai's because I wanted to determine just what kind of relationship they had (154 was so intriguing. that chapter didn't have to be like that but it was), and to do that, you need to get a decent grasp of each of those two characters. I make fanworks, so I HAVE to portray them, and I've drawn way over 200+ pieces of art with them in it, with most of them being comics with expressions and dialogues. So I think it's safe to say I have an idea of just what they're like, may it be all debunked in the end, but at least for the time being. I'm pretty sure though. If I didn't know what I signed myself into, I wouldn't have spent my effort and time in the first place!

So, here goes! If you don't think he's an unforgivable psychopath and a nasty liar who's coerced Ryosuke into stab Ai and kill his daughter and did serial murder for "his own sake"<whatever that's supposed to be, or wish he'd turn out to be something more complex than just a flat-out villain, If you want to know why Ai wants to "help" him, then this analysis may help you. It's going to help me too. I'm just revisiting what I've written about him, there is a mention of what takes place in 160, a little, too.

Oh before anything, Mephisto and Fatal is HIS SONG. With that as the baseline, everything just..starts clicking. That's how I started to realize just what this guy's going to be.

(translated through Chatgpt~~I CAN'T write this whole thing twice hhhghh)

I think I have a pretty accurate grasp when it comes to understanding emotions.

As for the latest chapter's developments (which will be released today), if we take all of Kamiki's words as the truth and compare them to previous chapters, there aren't many contradictions. If we closely analyze the things this character says, it turns out they haven't really done anything significant, nor are there many things to hold them accountable for. Even the words they say to Aqua might not be as mocking or provocative as initially thought. If you believe things as they are, it all fits in quite neatly.

Since around July, I've been piecing together the fragments we've been given, analyzing the character's psychology multiple times, and I was really accurate in predicting what they would do.

In reality, they haven’t done anything, and they've never tried to harm anyone. Nino and Ryosuke went to the hospital and killed Goro, while Kamiki only meant to send a bouquet of flowers. If what he claims is correct, he was even happy upon sending them, he didn't even try to "scare Ai". (I'd been screaming about that in the top of my lungs for so long and oh am I so relieved. I want to say I TOLD YOU SO! But with the whole chapter being so. Yeah. the way it is, I can't even be happy about it. )And I was right about all of it. I’ve gotten so many things right… though, to be fair, there wasn’t really any other way it could have played out.

The testimony? It really might be exactly as it is, and there’s a good chance none of it was a lie.

If the character’s actions, as depicted in the movie arc, and the occasional glimpses of their behavior weren't false, then their behavior integrates with that.

If we trust Aqua’s interpretation, the real question becomes: Why? Why would this character act the way they did? We have no idea about their motive. Why would they have gone to such lengths, spending years scheming? The motive is the most important issue here. Why? For what reason? There’s a lack of rationale. Ryosuke and Nino approached them first, so from the moment they met, they probably didn’t have a plan to use them, nor do we understand what they gained from it. And while it’s said that they sparked a flame of madness, the reasoning behind that is too weak. The actions taken don’t have the drive to escalate into something like murder. Showing a toothbrush leads to murder? Suggesting to turn themselves in leads to attempted murder? This feels like something that couldn't have happened without divine intervention. If they intended that effect, the actions taken to achieve it were far too weak. The behavior escalates unpredictably and drastically. It's almost like they were cursed. Honestly, I think Kamiki is cursed. “Fatal” is indeed his song. The lyrics about life being twisted because of the stars appear in that song, and I think the songs in the anime help fill in the most important pieces of this character.

The "motive."

The last expression in Chapter 159—every time I look at it, I become more convinced it’s a sad expression. If you cover their mouth, you can clearly see it.

This character smiles when they're going through a hard time. And they don’t get angry at all, to an almost abnormal degree. I think that’s what confuses people about this character.

When people say unfair or harsh things to them, or even when they’re being bullied or questioned, they don't fight back. They just endure it. Their expression falters for a moment, but then they pull themselves together and smile again.

This not only leads to misunderstandings, but it also makes you wonder if this character is really responsible for anything. It unintentionally makes people push responsibility onto them.

That behavior resurfaces in this chapter, too. If Aqua’s accusations have any basis, then Kamiki deserves to hear those things. But if not, then once again, they’re just enduring it as always.

Even as a child, Kamiki couldn’t defend themselves, so another child(Ai) had to step in and fight against the adult who was bullying them. They’re a character who’s too soft to stand up for themselves. It’s unclear whether that’s because they have a large threshold for patience, or if they’re just shy—it seems to be a bit of both. But they’ve endured more than most people would be able to.

I’ve been pointing out these patterns as I’ve been following the story. It’s an incredibly consistent behavioral pattern.

This is just a small part of it.

In terms of their behavior, Kamiki barely seems to experience anger. And it’s usually anger that drives strong actions or causes someone to affect others. This character doesn’t have that, which is why all their actions seem almost passive. I think they’re incredibly sad and in despair. But they don’t show the slightest sign of anger, even in situations where they should. That’s why I don’t think they could have harmed Ai or killed anyone. It’s beyond just being kind; it’s like there’s a deficiency, or they have the mental fortitude of a saint or a god.

When Ai asked Kamiki to come see their children, I don’t think Kamiki was entirely hopeless. It wasn’t a bad thing, after all. But in the end, Ai dies. Good things never happen to this person. Even when something good does happen, it disappears before they can fully enjoy it. Yet, despite that, they’re still so kind. Have we ever seen them get angry at someone? Not at all. They face people with a smile and remain polite, despite everything. Considering all that’s happened, it wouldn’t be surprising if they’d gone insane, but they don’t come off that way. They just seem truly depressed and hurt (yes, but I still think they might have killed Yura, so let’s wait and see how the truth unfolds).

Looking at how Kamiki acts, there’s something almost powerless about them. They’re too agreeable, never speaking up for themselves, and often at a loss for words. And this isn’t a one-time thing; it’s been consistent since they first appeared.

When they asked Ai, “You love me, right? You won’t leave me, right?” and Ai responded, “I don’t know,” Kamiki’s reaction was to go outside, cry in the rain. When Airi gaslit them with some absurd nonsense, their face just froze in despair. When Ai said something harsh and dumped them, Kamiki couldn’t say anything. Even 15 years later, when watching the video, they couldn’t say anything and just curled up while reaching out toward Ai. It’s been so consistent that I realized this character really has no ability to defend themselves. In any given situation, they just take all the blame and accept it as their fault.

This character experienced horrific things even from a very young age, and rather than thinking, “I don’t like this,” they thought, “People like me when I do this, so this must be the right thing to do.” With that kind of mindset, they’ve been knocked around here and there, internalizing every negative judgment about themselves, becoming almost self-destructive.

For this reason, I think there’s a less than 2% chance that this character would do something as aggressive as sending Ryosuke to Ai in an attack. Even four years after the breakup? I imagine this character would have just cried alone after receiving a phone call. I really think they would’ve gone off and cried in agony... but somehow let the address slip, which led to Ai’s death. And then they think, “I have to save Ai no matter what,” which ties things together. That theory fits perfectly with the songs and their personality. As for why Kamiki ended up with such a personality—it all lines up.

Going over the information we’ve been given, I wonder if this character even has it in them to hate anyone. People with a normal mentality would obviously hold grudges against certain people, but Kamiki doesn’t show any signs of that. They seem to internalize everything as their fault and just suffer. They’re remarkably gentle. When you remove the assumptions that they harmed Ai, killed Yura, or committed serial murders, Kamiki comes across as kind...

I doubt they were ever truly angry. I don’t think Kamiki can get angry or even knows how to. Instead, I think they were just thinking, “What’s going on?” When they found out Ai raised the kids on her own, they probably thought, “Am I really that untrustworthy? She really didn’t want to be with someone like me, huh?” They would have been heartbroken, just like the “disappointment” mentioned in Chapter 158. They couldn’t be with her. But they don’t seem like the type to resent Ai for that. If they had to blame someone, they’d blame themselves for being untrustworthy.

It seems their natural inclination is to beat themselves up rather than others. They can’t stand up for themselves, and whenever something goes wrong, they immediately think, “I must be to blame.” (They’re similar to Aqua, but worse because their self-esteem is even lower.) Ai’s words could have made them angry, and they would have been justified in being upset, but they couldn’t even do that.

Their reaction in Chapter 155, when they couldn’t say a word, lines up perfectly with this. From Kamiki’s perspective, Ai lied to them for over ten years, and now he’s saying he’s going to do something for Ai. This behavior has been consistent throughout. Even after 15 years, they’re still acting like this. Either they’ve always been this way, or this is how they’ve always acted when it comes to Ai (though, judging from their actions, I’d say it’s a general tendency).

Kamiki loved someone who never loved them back, to the point where they’d say, “I truly loved Ai, from the bottom of my heart. (She's)the girl I was willing to sacrifice my life for” If someone believed that the person they loved never loved them back, yet they still genuinely loved them enough to say, “I loved them to the point of giving my life for them”—well, that’s a pretty miserable state of mind, don’t you think? But even in such a state, it seems like they continued to do things for Ai. Since they thought Ai didn’t like them, they likely went on without considering themselves much, probably with the mindset of, “I don’t care if I die.”

Because of this, when this character says things like “It’s my fault” or “I did it,” I think those statements are a bit unreliable to believe at face value. It feels like they're saying Nino’s actions were their own fault because they wanted to blame themselves for everything, or because they couldn’t forgive themselves. I could be wrong, but regarding Yura, there’s a decent chance that they’re less responsible than expected, and I’d say there’s about a 50% chance they didn’t kill anyone at all. Originally, this isn’t a character who would harm others.

As for the page where Kamiki tells Aqua that he wanted to scare Ai—well, I think 80% of what he says there is a lie. The only part I believe to be true is when he admits to giving Ryosuke the address, and that he didn’t expect Ryosuke to kill her—probably an accident or unintended consequence. The reasoning Kamiki gives for his actions is ridiculous and foolish. There are countless ways to make someone feel despair, and it goes without saying that doing so is wrong. Plus, there’s no guarantee it would even work, and it’s not practical from the start. In short, it’s an action with a very low probability of achieving the desired result. That’s why I keep speculating that this situation doesn’t make sense. I think most fans would have the same thought about Kamiki’s statement, like, “How could he not have known what would happen?” Right? I don’t think this was Kamiki’s doing from the start. Any rational person would feel that way, and Kamiki doesn’t seem like a crazy person. Nino, on the other hand, might be a bit irrational, but I don’t think Kamiki is! That’s why I’m convinced that Nino was responsible, especially since she appeared on the scene.

↑I got this right. If this chapter is correct, the flashback in Chapter 154 was indeed false, and Kamiki’s self-blaming testimonies can’t be trusted.

I’ve said this many times before. And I was right about a lot of things. I was right about how Kamiki had no reason to kill Gorou, so it was Nino and Ryosuke who did it.

For Aqua’s argument to be convincing, he needs to present a valid reason or proof as to why his father acted the way he did.

Last time, I analyzed the motivations behind the actions of the characters in this manga, and for Kamiki, at least as far as the story has shown, his current goal (according to his own thoughts) is to do “something for Ai.”

When you look at the relationship between this character and Ai, there’s no other driving force that could push him to act. What Kamiki thinks is important for Ai is what drives him.

This idea is reflected in the songs “Mephisto” and “FATAL.”

According to Chapter 158, the emotions he’s experiencing are desire, disappointment, and despair.

Among these three emotions, “desire” is the only one that can drive someone to act. The other two make a person shrink back or become rigid.

These three emotions appear strongly and consistently in both “FATAL” and “Mephisto.” I’m good at reading emotions.

And the “desire” depicted in those two songs is the emotion of wanting to meet and see someone again, right?

In Chapter 160, the person that stands for the description of: “someone who desires love” is none other than Kamiki himself.

Ai wanted to give love, and Kamiki wanted to receive love. That’s Kamiki’s “desire.” It can’t be anything else. Wanting to harm Ai? Wanting to harm Ruby? No, that’s not it. Kamiki has the desire to meet Ai again and be loved by her.

So, what actions will this character take based on that desire? If we follow that thread, I think we’ll find the answer in the end. That's the key to understanding everything about him, his major drive.

[yuseirra]

Suddenly, I'm not even worried. I think I realize what they are trying to do with Kamiki(if he's ever going to show up again but they should. There are just too many things left unexplained about him so they must tell it, him being dead or not.)

I look over how he used to be and he had a personality that is miles kinder and sweeter compared to an average person. That's what gets me, because I wouldn't be as surprised if he started out with some evil in it. He really did start out as being noble. I am convinced Ai DID find the sweetest person to ever love. She found a type of person that is so rare to encounter, his personality is something...really unusually kind. People may disregard this part easily, but he was able to "be himself" as long as he had Ai with him. Just one person as his emotional support, and he was still able to remain kind and smile brightly despite all the horrible things he had to put up with. This actually means that his mental capacity is extremely high. If it were to be your average person, most would break down, grow bitter, devasted to a degree, but he actually could withstand that "If he had Ai." The way I see it, he could have remained that person he is as long as Ai was alive by his side.

Personally, I feel his initial personality was almost inhuman to a degree, he used to be too pure to the extent of being naive. It's not like he's foolish, it is that... He really didn't take malice as malice and was so prone to it. This kind of personality can get easily tainted. What's happened to him is that, he WASN'T evil, but he got... Really badly swayed and lost into that direction. And I think my line of thought is right, because that is what Ai, the one that SHOULD know about him more than anyone else in the world, had kids with him, wanted to stay together, was so concerned about and wished to help him out of.

This guy is... I think he's like a blank piece of paper. He can start out whiter than anyone. But when you start coloring with black, he just turns into it. It's intriguing.

Kind people can become twisted and insane, I get that, but there is something so unnatural about his mindset and this guy, I think he can be convinced of such things if someone/something taunts him that it's the right thing to do. A person like him would NOT be able to come up with thoughts like this on their own. But they CAN be persuaded into it out of desperation.

Remember how Kamiki did realize he was being used as he was taken advantaged by adults like twice his age and yet believed himself to thinking "it's the right thing to do" because they were happy if he did that? It's just... Why do I feel like this is what's been happening once he's lost Ai?

He does seem to realize he was sinning, but I feel as if he tried to convince himself that what he was doing was what could bring him to feel Ai and become closer to her, so he couldn't stop? I think something GAVE him that idea.

He could have still brought this upon himself yeah, but there is an entity that convinced him to break.

I am so sure of this. I really need to see what's happened to this character because... It really makes me curious. They're hiding so much things about him, and what I could piece together is that, he really wouldn't have broken down like this even with all that unreasonable misfortune and disaster poured on him, there must have been one final push that nudged him to finally break apart, and that didn't come from within him. He became extremely vulnerable after Ai's death, and that caused him to grab onto false hope, I feel like it was almost set up...like I said, his mental fortitude actually leans on the strong side. They had to bereave him of all of his emotional support and kill his love in order for him to completely lose it to the point of being broken to the point of being unrecognizable.

The songs support this idea when you examine them. It's not like I don't have a base, but even without it, I strongly feel this is the case. A person like this cannot break this bad by themselves on a natural level. There is something else. And considering how.. He was so good at convincing himself to believing that even horrible things can be "okay"... I think he kept lying to himself for "Ai's sake", I mean, what is there for this guy to even live for. I can't think of anything that'd make him want to live except for the hopes of meeting Ai or feeling her again, and that's EXACTLY what he says, WHAT THE SONGS CONTINUOUSLY SAY. I can't live without you, I can sacrifice everything, I can give my life away, it says. But what made him think doing something like him could actually provide him of what he wanted? There is something that's given him this belief, and Kamiki clung to it in desperation because he really HAD nothing to lose. And that thing.. I feel that thing wanted this to happen to him. They actively wanted to break this guy into using him, caused all his misfortune...they WANTED to reap him of his nobility and succeeded. Ai wanted to stop that from happening because he can get really vulnerable in that direction, he can be changed into an entirely different person because of how pure he was. That's what I think has happened. He NEEDS saving. We need to see what took over his mind. I want to study it.

[yuseirra]

Hehe.. I'm okay, I mean.. Either way, it means I have one less thing to worry about.

If it is how it is, then I don't have to worry so much about what happens in this piece. If it somehow goes the way I want, I'll have something to keep on loving.

I honestly really still don't picture what point the plot would have and how the story would make sense if they decide if this is how the story would go in this direction,(it's a chapter, I still feel things should be seen in full and have some sort of good theme that wraps it all together) but I'm not saying that the author is wrong. They decide what to do with the story and their characters, I believe that for a creator, their characters can sometimes be like their child.. That's how it is for me when I write them, it depends on the creator, but I believe they will have a degree of affection for what they've brought into this world.

I wouldn't like it, it's underwhelming, and whatever this new chapter suggests could have made sense and fit better like 50 chapters ago and would have had better catharsis if it happened much earlier I feel, but that's my personal opinion I form after having read it with my own interpretations. I could say that I tried my best and put very careful attention to it in my own way.

You really don't need to try console me, it's getting really annoying.. I'm sorry, but being spoiled every single time for the past.. Month or two after having been very attached to a ship had been so rough for me, I think it was even worse than seeing how the chapters play out for myself and forming a clear opinion on it. Don't warn me or say you're sorry, I can handle it on my own. I'm really used to doing it for myself. why??; I'm just going to read or drop this series if I'm not satisfied with it, I want to keep giving it a chance and keep loving it if/while I can. It's fine. If I need it, I will organize my thoughts in a post, draw it out, or talk to my friends. I'll tell you if I NEED to talk! I'm having fun.

The really interesting thing about this work is, while I get really frustrated about how wacky and bizzare things turn out to be, I always find something about these chapters that.. Give me hope still? Idk if they are false hope though XD it's ridiculous, but I keep reading. I'll keep my hopes brightly lit if I can find them and I actually... Still kinda do. I wonder if it'll hit even more rock bottom than this lol. If you forget about Kamiki and Ai maybe this isn't the worst either, but honestly, I really, really am rooting for Ai in this one and her love. I like that about her and hey, if I'm the one who writes this story, I'd make her every choices worth it.

I feel the author really loves her character, she's well-crafted, so I want to believe that!

So there. Until next chapter drops!

[yuseirra]

**Onk ch 160 spoilers**

I'm really sorry about talking what's not been brought up in official yet, I got SENT stuff and it just...bugs my head so much because I've been having so much brainrot regarding this series lately, my mind keeps functioning on its own and I can't stop my head from running. Please dodge what's below if you wish to keep from it.

You know, I've thought it through last night after having met up with my friends and had a blast(we went to karaoke and Fatal was added in the available songs!! It was so fun trying to sing it~)

If what Kamiki claims IS all true(and I think it is?? There is no reason for him to lie about those and everything makes sense and clicks together, it also does align to how he used to be)

I GOT EVERYTHING RIGHT ABOUT HIM. I GOT LITERALLY EVERYTHING RIGHT. I kept saying this guy can't hurt Ai. He doesn't have it in him. I GOT SO MUCH OF EVERYTHING RIGHT, I just see this actually being the truth really well, that should be how he is. It makes total sense.

And it turns out he really didn't take part in the murders either (except for Yuras which is still left ambiguous but didn't Aqua and Akane say Nino's responsible for it?;; what if he thinks he's to blame for that but it actually isn't? Then he isn't responsible for any of the murder cases that's happened onscreen at least)

Regardless of whether he's good or bad at this point, I feel like this guy is CURSED!!!; Weird things happen around him and I don't think the events that happened regarding Ai's death were intentional at least, if it were to be so, Aqua's reactions wouldn't have been like that. He didn't accuse of what happened regarding Ai, I think he's talking about what Kamiki's tried to do after that. Aqua believes he's after Ruby now and aims to stop him. Anyhow something's out to get this guy bad. His life is so unfortunate, it'd be hard not to grow insane at this rate. Aqua looks seriously on edge but the same should be said about Kamiki too

I analyzed this character's psychology all July~August, right? I don't know whether if he does want to hurt Ruby or not but if what this guy's said regarding what's happened to Ai is really the truth (and that's literally. Literally how I thought things would be all along?? I got 99% of things right except for the details that'd be impossible to predict on my own accord & only the author would know!!!) I think he really DOES love his children that Ai's left behind as well. I don't see him being any other way.

You have to see the little things people say that have no particular reason to be there and wasn't told after an inquiry but was just put out there on a whim. Those are what's usually the true feelings. He said he loves Ai from the bottom of his heart, he wanted to sacrifice his life for hers, and that he does have fatherly feelings, those, in my opinion, ARE what's really there because no one asked him to tell of these stuff and he just. Throws those ideas out there.

In that case, Kamiki's life is true suffering. He can turn out to be evil. I'll just.. Sit back and watch this series with a popcorn if that happens but if that isn't it and my interpretations of him are true(and with my perceptions of how he'd act.. Just matching up so perfectly at this rate I think I'm on the right track?) this guy would BREAK. What's happening to him now is too much. Ai would want to save him from his misery, she loved him, so I believe he's worth it. It's just ridiculous just how much he has to put up with. It's such an unfortunate life he has, how can he still smile when it's like that?

So yes..I have to see more eps to see just what will unfold,

But Kamiki's life is so cursed to the extent it feels weird. I think my theories about him can REALLY be it. Something is ruining his life and that's the black star, read over the lyrics in Fatal, there IS a star that's doing that to him if that's his song which I think it is.

Hsggkfjk um..yeah. That's.. Personally how things are going to make sense for me. Unless the author has some more plot plots they hid to overturn everything and prove what I felt about this character is wrong. I'm pretty confident about reading character emotions though. Those are things I end up getting right with pretty good accuracy.