#kaiju horoscopes

[kaijuposting]

Kaiju Horoscopes

Aries: The longings of the heart are mysterious and often contradictory, but remember that you can’t have your date and eat them, too.

Taurus:��To expand your mind, you must expand your body. A barrel of toxic goo may help you today. Gemini: Verbalizing your feelings can be difficult, we know. When in doubt, you should try roaring loudly. Cancer: Strange cravings today, eh? Well, seeing as you’re a monster, you should absolutely go for it. Leo: Feeling like a bit of a beached fish today? Try flopping around until you catch the attention of some pirates; the fiber in the ship’s timbers will at least keep you regular. Virgo: Signs indicate that it’s just not your day to rampage. Try relaxing at home with A Monster in Paris instead. Libra: Seems you’re feeling extra fabulous today, so perhaps try showing off your splendor in the downtown shopping district. Scorpio: Looks like you’ll be spending awhile in some dark, damp places. Try evolving mole claws to dig your way out, or dig yourself in deeper, whichever. Sagittarius:  Your dazzling mating dance is indeed dazzling, but you might want to tone down the dazzle a notch so the rest of us can have functional eyes afterward. Capricorn: Yes, we know how much fun picking fights can be. But remember that you’re not invincible and that in end you’d much rather be loved. Aquarius: If you need to sink beneath the waves for awhile you are allowed to do that. Just because you’re gigantic doesn’t mean those missiles don’t leave marks. Pisces: It is time to Rise and Go Forth, to heed to the strange yearnings in your heart, to explore strange new worlds and frighten new civilizations.

[windvexer]

would you give blog recs? i just wonder who/what you follow

so like if one rec was a blog that posts chicken pics, i wouldn't mind

just curious

I don't scroll through the dash much these days.

Here are people whose content I always tend to enjoy:

@serpentandthreads

@pondering-the-kaiju

@normal-horoscopes (do not be fooled; the horoscopes are not normal)

@tieras

@a-witch-named-crow

@sewceress

@theoldcottage

@elminx

@stagkingswife

@asksecularwitch

@pagan-stitches

@zarya-zaryanitsa

@lurelurk

@breelandwalker

@luc3

@hillsarehollow

@crazycatsiren

@graveyarddirt / @msgraveyarddirt

@upyrica

@traegorn

@upthewitchypunx

@nythembra

@graycloak

@hillbillyoracle

@30000-bees-in-a-pointed-hat

@will-o-the-witch

@maddiviner

@stormwaterwitch

And of course, @chick-it-out and @homeofhousechickens

[elfmoon3]

Kaiju Zodiacs in my opinion

Aries - angruirus

Taurus - Baragon

Gemini - Battra

Cancer - Ebirah

Leo - King Caesar

Virgo - Mothra

Libra - Zilla Jr.

Scorpio - Kumonga

Sagittarius - Rodan

Capricorn - Godzilla

Aquarius - Manda

Pisces - Biollante

[the-dubstep-strawberry]

About Me

It’s that time again, folks... more than you ever needed to know about me, lol

Rules: answer 17 questions and tag 17 people you’d like to know better!

Tagged by @gaeadene​! Thanks!

Nickname: Dubs

Zodiac: Taurus

Height: A towering and impressive 5′1″.

House: Ravenclaw

Last thing I Googled: Russian swear words so I could explain what they meant to my friends. (Blyat.)

Song in my head: Doja Cat - Say So

Followers and following: Followed by 176 very cool people. Following 171 other cool people.

Amount of sleep: The sleep to caffeine ratio is mostly in balance. Mostly.

Lucky number: Depends who you ask. Horoscope says 5, 9, 11, 14, 25. Numerology says 2. Who the hell knows.

Dream job: My current gig’s fine. I love my office. Let me write in my spare time and it’s all good.

Wearing: Jeans and a Godzilla: World Destruction Tour shirt.

Fave songs: Well that is a long, long list, my friends. But here are a few that I listen to a lot:

1. The Knocks - Classic 2. Seoul - Stay With Us 3. Powers - Closer 4. The Chainsmokers feat. Halsey - Closer 5. Taylor Swift - New Romantics 6. deadmau5 - Cthulhu Sleeps 7. Fightstar - We Apologize For Nothing 8. Nero - Doomsday 9. EDX - Breathin’ 10. Nora En Pure - Lost In Time

Bonus: The Human League - Human (an all-time fave)

(This is by no means exhaustive. My library is huge.)

Instruments: No. Not a thing.

Random fact: I can say thank you in ten languages - Welsh, English, French, German, Spanish, Italian, Czech, Russian, Japanese and Mandarin.

Favorite Authors: Terry Pratchett, Neil Gaiman, H.P. Lovecraft, Edgar Allan Poe, Mervyn Peake, Raymond Chandler. I also stan Shakespeare.

Fave animal sounds: Peaceful birdsong, Strawberry Kitty’s outrage when I give him kisses he wasn’t expecting, and the fearsome beep of the Namibian Desert Rain Frog.

Aesthetic: Think The Color Out Of Space, with Nicolas Cage. Pink, black. Outer space. Kaiju everything. Eldritch plushies. Impending doom, but the happy kind.

I tag: @solesurvivorkat​, @redwing907​, @itsmesaberaltered​, @inforapenny-inforapound​, @prydwencats​, @lamorellenoire6​, @lynnarii​, @ladynyxeris​, @falsenostalgia-sundries​, @pchberrytea​, @thegreatdivide​, @kittinkanin​, @randomfallout4posts, @mojavejourneys, @theartofblossoming, @derelict-blade and @sharonaw!

[kaijuposting]

I’m bored and I have an astrology app, so I’m writing kaiju-themed horoscopes. Aries: Your love of tall people is going to take a turn for the monstrous. Just know there are no takesie-backsies on any love confessions you find yourself compelled to make. Taurus: There’s nothing like a giant monster to make you confront the immense scale of the universe, but like, “kaiju rodeo” probably isn’t the best coping mechanism here.  Gemini: Please double-check to make sure your kaiju-fighting mech isn’t stuck in reverse before you take off; it’s always awkward when that happens. Cancer: Yes, the giant monster will love you for making them dinner. This could absolutely be the start of a beautiful new relationship. Leo: If you’re feeling a bit sluggish, try writing poetry about your favorite kaiju. The world must know how cute and precious they are. Virgo: Trouble pulling everything together? Can’t think clearly? Yeah, that’s because you need to let go and let your inner monster out. Libra: Polite society generally frowns on eating buildings, but I’ve heard the financial district is extra tasty today. Scorpio: I know it’s tempting to sit around and sulk about it all day, but activating your laser breath can be quite cathartic. Sagittarius: The world won’t actually end if you give in to your “forbidden desire” to kiss a kaiju on the snoot, I promise. Capricorn: The problem is that you forgot the reverse the polarity on your brain. Once you fix that, you can talk to all the kaiju you want.