#kagome is a precious bean | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

akitokihojo · 3 years ago

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'Tis the Damn Season

I don't care if it's early January. Being super busy means I get a grace period to post a Christmas Fic.

It's long. Like, really long. I'm sorry. And, I know I don't usually post on Mondays, especially so late in the day, but I'm tired, and I can't look at it anymore, and don't really want to hang onto this as we get further and further away from December. lol

Okay, so if you read this, thank you v much. I missed writing pining idiots, so have a butt load of it.

AO3

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It was hard to keep her eyes on the road when the atmosphere of her hometown was nothing short of mesmerizing. Every year since Kagome could remember, the decorations went up, the snow fell down, and when the lights came on, it was like magic in the air. Even now, in the daylight hidden behind thick, gray clouds, she couldn’t help but toss her head back and forth to look at each wreath hung on light posts she passed.

The speed limit may have been thirty-five miles per hour, but no one was going over twenty. The snow had piled up and the streets were slick. From the phone calls she’d received from her mother over the last week, she’d heard about the several feet of snow that’d just kept falling. Kagome must have gotten too acclimated to the city she’d moved to years ago. It was hours away from the mountains, and if they got snow, it was no more than two inches. She’d had the audacity to think her mother was exaggerating. From the looks of it, the reality was actually downplayed.

It had been at least five years since she’d last returned home. Her family chose to come out to her twice, she spent one Christmas with an ex, and one on her own that contained a very long FaceTime call with her mom where they virtually opened gifts with each other and spent time together the only way they could. This year, her younger brother concocted a plan. Months ago, he called Kagome up to arrange for her to come out. She’d wanted to as it was, but when he mentioned they should surprise their mom, she was all in. So, she told her mom she was going on a business trip this year. Kagome worked for an editing company and she’d just recently gotten a promotion, so the lie was easy to spin. She was busy as an editor with some high maintenance clients, and it was gratifying work. Did her promotion entail any sort of traveling, though? Not at all. Her business was all on the computer, but her mom didn’t know every single detail.

It was crushing to see the disappointment on her mother’s face. Her mom was the type of person to swallow her ill feelings and put on a smile so everyone was comfortable. She rarely complained, always emphasized how proud she was of her children for leaving the nest and taking life by the horns, and was the type of mom to leave sweet voicemails when Kagome couldn’t answer a call. It wasn’t normal to witness any sort of sadness on her mom’s precious face. And, she’d covered it up quickly, telling Kagome to do her best and they’d FaceTime on Christmas morning. But, Kagome had noticed. It almost made her break, and she was so close to spilling the beans then.

Thankfully, she’d remained disciplined. Her brother would have pulverized her otherwise. There may be a six year age gap between them, but ever since Sota hit puberty, spiked in height, his voice dropped, and he stopped looking so scrawny, the kid started giving Kagome a run for her money. Sitting at twenty-two now, several inches taller than her, and nearly as quick-witted as she, there was no way she was going to get on his bad side. The one thing she had over him was speed, and the last time they saw each other, she’d antagonized him to the point where she’d had to run for her life.

Driving very carefully as she wandered through the more residential neighborhoods of the small town, she could finally see the house she grew up in. Sota had been home from college for over a week already, taking his last final online, so he had to have helped their mom put up the Christmas lights outside. They twinkled around the edging of their roof, glowing in the dull light that the clouds provided. Even that caused Kagome to gleam. She’d missed this so much. It wasn’t until now that she realized how painfully homesick she actually was. And, it didn’t help that she was moments away from executing the biggest surprise ever.

Kagome had turned her location on for her brother to monitor on her way over, so it was no surprise that he was coming outside and shutting the door behind him just as she pulled up. It was hard not to squeal from the excitement. She put her sedan in park, twisted her key out of the ignition, threw her car door open, and ran to meet Sota where they collided in a hug. Stupidly, she wasn’t wearing her jacket yet. She was already shivering where she stood, clinging onto him for another minute longer just to absorb some of his body heat.

“Oh my god, it’s freezing.” She trembled, finally pulling away to tuck her fingers into the thin sleeves of the hoodie she dawned.

“Oh, you city slickers.” Sota joked. “Please tell me you brought warmer clothes.”

“Of course, I did.” She notched her head for him to follow as she urgently shuffled back to her car, nearly slipping on the shoveled walkway. Kagome leaned over the driver’s seat, grabbing for the beige, puffy jacket strewn carelessly on the passenger side. Never had she gotten an article of clothing on so quickly in her life, frantically zipping it up and tucking her hands inside the pockets.

Sota was laughing, opening up her trunk to grab the luggage and gifts she’d brought along with her. “Don’t worry, the worst we’re gonna get for a few days is flurries. The snow should melt a little.”

“No, don’t say that.” Kagome gave a small whine.

Sota glanced over at her disheartened expression, securing her laptop bag over his shoulder. “I said a few days. The forecast is one hundred percent snow on Christmas Eve.”

Her smile grew exponentially brighter. “White Christmas?”

“Did you expect anything less from here?”

“I missed this!”

“Shut up,” He chuckled, closing the trunk. “Mom was in the kitchen when I stepped out. She’ll hear you.”

Sealing her lips shut in an effort to contain her excitement, Kagome reached for a couple Christmas bags to free from his full hands. Behind him, the charcoal truck parked in the driveway of their neighbor’s house that had already been hard to ignore finally claimed her undivided attention. From what she remembered, the vehicle usually parked there was an SUV.

“What’s with the truck? Miss Izayoi get another upgrade?”

Sota’s head spun to look, but as he turned back to her, the grimace deep on his face, she felt her heart give an ill-feeling thump. It leapt into her throat and then plummeted into her stomach. Dread curved her lips into a frown as she mouthed the word, “No.”

“No,” Kagome repeated, this time in a hoarse whisper.

Sota cringed worse, being the only one to truly know what had happened between them and the way Kagome used to feel. “Yeah.”

“He’s home?” She’d kept her voice low, desperate. She hadn’t even considered the fact that they might run into each other. It was so abnormal nowadays, that this time around, Kagome had nearly forgotten that they used to live right next to one another. “What happened to the heads up I should have gotten?”

“I’m sorry. I was hoping you two wouldn’t even notice each other. Like the last time.”

“Sota, it’s not that we didn’t notice each other. It’s that I hid from him.” Kagome argued.

“Oh, shit that’s right.” He hissed.

“Because, I knew he was here!”

“I know, I’m sorry. He showed up a few days ago. Look, let’s back track.” Sota tried. “Yes, Miss Izayoi got a new car. One she, uh,” He glimpsed the truck again. “One she needs a step stool to get into.”

“Oh my god.” She breathed. Sota could tell she was inwardly spiraling, and he urged her inside.

“Come on, it’ll be fine. I promise.”

“Sota, I’m gonna need you to go over there and tell him to leave.”

She was making it so hard for him not to laugh. Even he was surprised he’d maintained composure through her beginning frenzy.

“It’s my turn to be home for Christmas.”

“He wasn’t here last year. Or, the year before that.”

She stiffened, feeling her lips jut out in a pout. Uncomfortable, Kagome bobbed from foot-to-foot. “I said what I said.”

“Get inside, you fucking drama queen. You two will have nothing to do with each other.” Her brother shoved everything he held into one hand and grabbed her wrist to forcefully pull her along.

“But -“

“Shut up.” He gave a squeeze to her arm as they got closer to the door, and Kagome finally tore her brown eyes away from the charcoal truck of doom.

She needed to push it to the back of her mind. Sota was right. They’d have nothing to do with each other. She’d successfully hidden from him one time. So well, in fact, that he didn’t even know she was merely a hundred feet away. And, that’s saying something since the guy was half demon and had a keen sense of smell. Chances are, he wouldn’t even know she was there this time around. He was visiting to see his mother, and she was visiting to see hers. Outside of town, they were so far disconnected from one another that it wouldn’t even make sense to think they’d suddenly reconnect now.

With a deep breath, an exasperated groan, and a slug to her brother’s arm for giving in and laughing at her, Kagome was just about back on track. Inuyasha was nothing but a friend from her past. A best friend that stayed in the past. Instead of focusing on the anxiety-inducing chance that she’d see him, she instead focused on the good news that Miss Izayoi wouldn’t be alone this Christmas.

Sota gently placed her belongings down in the entryway as Kagome shut the door behind her. The house was substantially warmer than outside, and Kagome could feel the heat thawing out the tip of her nose already. Her brother pressed his finger to his lips in a gesture to stay quiet as they kicked off their wet shoes before walking deeper into the house.

“Sota?” Their mom called, and Kagome’s stomach erupted in thrilled butterflies. She’d never been part of a planned surprise for someone before. Hell, she’d never been the surprise for someone before. And, she was just so excited to see her mother in person.

“Yeah.” He answered, peeking around the hall to see his mom’s back facing them. She was still in the kitchen, and from the looks of it, she was getting ready to start dinner. Her apron was on and a cutting board was set out on the island counter while she fished through the refrigerator.

“Where’d you go, sweetie? I didn’t even realize you got up.”

“I left my charger in the car.” He seamlessly lied, entering further to stop at the opposite side of the counter with Kagome following in behind him.

“You’re so quiet, I swear.” She giggled. “Makes me worried about how many times you might have snuck out as a teenager.”

“Only twice.” He was actually telling the truth that time, but he’d said it so casually.

She hummed in restrained displeasure, giving him a fleeting glance as she placed some vegetables on the counter and headed over to the pantry. “Is it still snowing?”

“Nope.” He replied stiffly, putting his all into resisting a chortle. Kagome was directly next to him now, looking as baffled as ever to have been missed like that. Her jaw hung open and she gaped his way. Even the small crinkle from the gift bags she'd placed on the island didn’t catch their mother’s attention.

“Good. Want to help with dinner? I’m making a stew. I feel like that’d be nice over a bed of rice for a cold night like this. What do you think?”

Sota quickly moved from the spot he was in to aid his mother as she reached for the large, ceramic bowl on the top shelf. Her toes were pressed up and her arms stretched out as far as they could go while she struggled to grab what she needed, and given her recent track record for clumsiness, Sota wasn’t having it. “Mom, let me. What else do you need?”

His mom took the bowl from his hand, thanking him with a tender grin. “Would you mind pulling the crockpot down from the cupboard? I think I’d like to do this the easy way tonight.”

“What can I help with, mama?” Kagome finally spoke. Their mother glanced her way but only out of reaction to see who’d talked. It was the double take that was the big catch. The smile on her face fell into an expression of shock, and her eyes lit up immediately. Her grasp slipped on the bowl as her hands flew up, and Sota’s reflexes were impressive as he lunged to successfully catch it.

“What!?” She shouted, completely taken aback by her daughter’s sudden presence. Within seconds, she folded, tears springing to her eyes as she bounced around the counter elatedly to clutch her baby girl. Her voice was high and her arms were shaking, though not a word she said was missed through either of her children’s laughter. “What are you doing here!? What about your work trip!? When did you get here!? Oh my god, you’re here!”

“I just showed up.” Was the only thing Kagome could respond with as she hugged her arms around her mom’s waist a little tighter.

“But, what are you doing here!?”

“Sota and I wanted to surprise you!”

“Well, it worked, you dirty liars.” Her mother sniffled, pulling back to cradle Kagome’s pink and smiling face before jumping forward to hold her a little more. “So, no work trip?”

“If I had one, I sure did travel in the exact opposite direction of it.” Kagome said sarcastically, giggling as her mother gave a tsk of her tongue.

Finally able to pull herself away, Kagome’s mom looked around for her things. “How long are you staying?”

“The week.”

“Until Christmas!?” She asked happily. “Where’s your bag?”

“Two days after, I go home. And, it’s in the hall. Couldn’t carry that all in without giving away my grand entrance.”

“Okay, okay, enough of the waterworks.” Sota groaned through the prideful smirk on his face. He made his way to the fridge, pulling out a container. “Who wants eggnog?”

Being down for absolutely anything right now, their mom rose her hand and bounced on her toes. She was so excited, that if someone told her to forego a homemade meal and run out for taco bell - the very thing that turned her stomach upside down in the worst ways - she would have.

Kagome eyed the carton and the smirk on her younger brother’s face. She knew that look. “Sota, does she?” She asked skeptically.

Still smiling, he nodded, placing the eggnog on the counter before reaching for three mugs. Twisting the cap off, he poured his mom a glass and placed it before her, not surprised when she didn’t immediately take it as she was still clearing her cheeks of tears. Sota spun around, grabbing the unopened bottle of rum he’d hidden on top of the refrigerator.

“Ah, there it is.” Kagome pointed.

“Sota.” Their mom gasped.

“Mom.” He lightly mimicked in return, eyeing out a shot into each mug before mixing in the eggnog. “Here, May, see if this is strong enough for you.” He said, sliding Kagome’s mug over to her.

Kagome nearly choked on the sip she’d taken. “Dude…”

“Oh. Too strong?”

“No more guessing for you.”

Sota took a slurp, smacking his lips together a few times as he tested the taste. “It’s fine to me.”

“God, what are they giving you college kids these days?” Kagome asked, grabbing the eggnog from him to try and dull out the taste in her cup.

“Please don’t answer that in front of me. I am blissfully naive and would like to stay that way.” Their mom said, as she swiftly changed the subject with a raise of her glass. “I propose a toast!”

“No - mom.” Sota grumbled.

“Yes! Toast!”

Kagome laughed, raising her mug of spiked eggnog while her brother begrudgingly obliged. Their mother was notorious for toasting anything and everything. There was no logical explanation for this; she just loved to celebrate the littlest occurrences.

“To both of my babies being home for Christmas.”

“Huzzah!” Kagome and Sota cheered.

Both siblings clanked their mugs on the counter and took a large swig of their drinks, bringing a huge cringe from Kagome that wriggled her shoulders and caused her nose to crinkle.

“Never mind, you two are ridiculous together.” Their mom rolled her eyes with a sigh, though she wasn’t actually the least bit bothered. She took a healthy gulp of her own drink before taking it with her to the vegetables. “You know, speaking of being home, you’ll never guess who’s here.”

“Who?” Kagome asked, taking residence in a stool at the counter while Sota took the initiative to bring in her things from the entryway.

“Inuyasha.” The grin on her mother’s face was wide, her cheeks still a bit blustery from the happiness that’d yet to die down.

“Oh, yeah?” Kagome coolly played off. Her mom knew the basics, but not everything. It all took place back in a time when teenagers didn’t share those details of their lives with their parents. It was awkward. Being a teenager with any sort of feelings was awkward. Even being well into her late twenties now, Kagome didn’t feel inclined to spill the most uncomfortable bits of her life from over a decade back. She wanted to let it all go, and quite frankly, had been trying to do so for a long time. The only reason Sota was in the know was because he’d seen her crushed from their last run-in and helped her through it. How could she not let him in after walking in on her like that?

It wasn’t a door she was going to reopen, though. Her mom knew every other intimate detail, but this one, as dated as it was, could stay in the decade it belonged in.

“Yeah. He’s here for the rest of the month. Pretty cool, huh?”

“Pretty cool.” She nodded along, taking another sip of her drink. Suddenly, Kagome didn’t mind the heavy spice of rum.

“Why don’t you go say hi?”

“Well, because that’d be weird.”

“How would that be weird?” Her mom blinked, picking up the knife as she got to chopping the produce.

“Mom, we haven’t spoken in ages. You know this.” She explained with slight exasperation. “I can’t just walk over there and pretend we’re seventeen again. Even smalltalk would be,” Kagome paused as a chill ran up her spine. “Uncomfortable.”

“You’re so silly.” She giggled. “When you’re best friends for as long as you two were, you don’t just lose a bond like that. Especially if you simply grew apart. But,” Her mom was particular to use an emphatic to prevent Kagome from interrupting. “If you aren’t comfortable, then you aren’t comfortable. I respect that. As you kids would say, you do you, boo.”

“You do you, boo.” Sota repeated with more of a hip tone, re-entering the room. “Mom, where are your car keys?”

“Didn’t you take them?”

“When?”

“When you went to get your charger.”

“Mom,” He pointed to Kagome. “I went to go get her. I was lying.”

“Oh. They’re in my purse then. Why? Are you going somewhere?” Their mother’s face drooped in disappointment as she set her knife down on the counter. “Sweetie, I’m cooking, and -“

“Chill, I’ve just gotta get May’s gift’s out of the trunk.”

“What do you mean, they’re in the -“ She gasped thickly, sharply. “Oh my god, your gifts! I had Sota ship them to you!”

He stood there with a wry grin, waiting for her to clue in. Honestly, with how much effort Sota had put into this, maybe it shouldn’t have been Kagome that got the huge hug for her arrival. He’d really thought of everything. Sans the warning. Almost everything.

The fear in their mom’s expression gradually dwindled as she read the look on her son’s face. The remainder of his statement finally processed, and she wasn’t sure whether to deadpan or show relief. “They’re in the trunk?”

“Yup.”

“You brat.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Anything else I should know?”

Sota pulled the lanyard with her keys on them out of her purse, jingling them as he waltzed to the entry hall. “Yes. I’m pregnant.”

—

Kagome awoke the next day as groggy as ever. If there was anything she wasn’t, it was a morning person. She rubbed her eyes and pushed her messy, black hair from her face, staring at the white ceiling above her as she tried to sink further into the pillows of the bedroom she used to occupy before moving out.

There were only small changes made by her mom since then. The color of the bedding was more neutral, the boy band posters were long gone, and the layout was altered a bit. Instead of the bed frame being completely against the wall in the corner, her mom had switched it up to sit more center. There was also a TV in the room now. Kagome was covered by a thick comforter that she would gladly stay under all day if she could. It was the kind that hugged you while not being too heavy, and made that luxurious crinkle sound anytime you moved.

She’d realized last night that she’d left her purse in her car. Kagome had been too wrapped up in the quality time she was spending with her family that she couldn’t be bothered to run out and get it. The neighborhood was rather safe, and even though she’d learned to be paranoid about things like that, just for the night, she let it slide. Laying there, she figured she should just get it over with and grab the damn thing. It had her phone charger in it, and her wallet, and of course, her chapstick. Kagome had lost track of how many times already she’d licked her lips, but the dryness was driving her insane.

Throwing the blanket off of her, she slid out of bed. Her pajamas consisted of red, flannel pants that fit a little too big and a black tank top she would have easily swapped out for a long sleeve if the heater wasn’t on in the house. Lazily, Kagome ruffled her fingers through her long tresses to try and arrange it all a little better. Specifically, her bangs. With naturally wavy hair, her fringe had the tendency to sort of do it’s own thing unless blowdried into position, and next-morning-hair was particularly unruly.

“Morning.” Sota greeted as soon as she walked out into the living room, his voice thick from sleep. He was in the kitchen, getting the coffeepot going with his short hair in absolute shambles.

Kagome could only muster a grunt as she headed toward the door.

“Hey, you remember that snow covering the ground means it’s cold outside, right?” He asked, arching a brow.

He was right, but she’d left her coat in the bedroom. And, the bedroom was in the exact opposite direction of her vehicle. So, she grabbed his from the coatrack in the entrance, opting to take his shoes too, since they were larger, and therefore, easy to slip on. Grabbing her car keys from the entry table, Kagome unlocked the front door and slumped out into the biting freeze of the air with nothing but a sharp inhale and that same breathe clutched within her chest.

Inuyasha glanced over at the noise of a door opening, shovel in hand as he was clearing up the walking path so his mother wouldn’t have to. Being out in the snow should have prevented any sort of shocks to his system, but he hadn’t expected to see her. On top of that, he wasn’t remotely prepared for the odd sensation inside of his abdomen to soar uncontrollably, or for his heart to do this weird twinge, or for his throat to swell up like it had. Everything sort of hit him on the spot, and he did a double take. It was her. It was Kagome.

He hadn’t seen her in years, and still, these were the effects she had on him. Maybe it was due to the surprise he was thrown off by. Or, maybe he was just awestruck.

Her hair was longer than when he’d last seen her. Way longer. He remembered it being just below her shoulders in her early community college years, and now it neared her lower back. The baggy clothes she was donning made it hard to determine a difference in her physique, but it was impossible to care about that sort of thing. Having known Kagome for so long, it was clear to him that things involving her were more than just a physical attraction.

The girl was as oblivious as ever. She seemed to be in a lifeless trance, trying to walk in a pair of tennis shoes four sizes too large on the path her younger brother had cleared a day and a half ago. She trudged over to a white car that he’d failed to really pay attention to before, unlocking it on her second attempt to press the button on the remote right. She was on the driver’s side, opening the back, passenger door, finally taking one of her hands out of the large sleeves of the jacket she wore to grab something from within.

Kagome regretted that she actually needed fingers to grasp onto things. How could she be dumb enough to think that thirty seconds outside wouldn’t be too bad? The way her jaw shivered, teeth clashing, had her reevaluating her life choices when she wasn’t fully awake.

A flash of silver and black in her peripherals caught her attention as she stood up straight, and as she inadvertently followed her eyes to see what it was, Kagome completely froze. She wasn’t sure what sort of expression she’d been holding before this, but she felt it drop. He was taller than she remembered. Or, maybe it wasn’t that. Maybe it was the muscle he’d put on, evident even through the dark sweater he wore. His silver hair was tied back into a ponytail, triangular ears on the top of his head just as they’d always been. Bright, golden eyes stared back at her, seeming almost as shocked as she was. But, then a soft smile appeared on his lips. One she couldn’t handle seeing. One she was unprepared for. One that made her heart thunk against her ribcage.

Oh no.

Inuyasha took a step in her direction, and his mouth opened to speak. She’d heard his voice just slightly before her panic took rein and she spoke over him.

“Y-yes. Yes, I’m here. I am so sorry.” Kagome fumbled over her words to say. She looked away as if to better concentrate in her act, and then glanced back over to Inuyasha with an apologetic grimace. She pointed to her ear as if to gesture she was on a call with headphones, using that same moment to make sure her thick hair was covering her lie. “Yes, I can see about getting that back to you today.”

She took a pause for the sake of theatricals.

“Well, I did warn you that I would be on vacation, so you should have sent this my way well in advance.”

Inuyasha jolted to a stop, heat flushing over his face as he felt mild embarrassment from mistaking that he’d actually be able to talk to her for the first time in too many years. He acknowledged her silent, mouthed apology with a wave to dismiss it all and watched her hurry back toward the house, the shoes she borrowed grinding against the cement since she struggled to actually pick her feet up the entire way. The door nearly slammed the moment she was back inside, and Inuyasha pursed his lips. He really shouldn’t have been surprised. Their friendship didn’t necessarily end on the greatest terms. He was a prick, always jealous, too protective for someone in his position, and absolutely clueless back then on why that was the case or how to properly communicate that sort of thing. Kagome justifiably grew fed up with his shit, and going to separate colleges just sort of aided in their falling out. He hasn’t seen her since she was transferring from the community college here to a university ten hours away, and even then, it was awkward.

It was like they had nothing to talk about anymore back then. Her mom threw her a little going away party that his mom had pushed him into going to alongside her since he was advantageously in town. They weren’t the best friends they used to be. He’d immediately gone away to a state college right out of high school, phone calls lessened, video chats rarely happened, and by the time text messaging was a big thing, Kagome had gotten a new number that he never received. So, why he’d suddenly think small talk would be easy, he’d never know. What came over him was stupid. He should have remained stiff and gone back to shoveling. He should have been the old Inuyasha and pretended he hadn’t even noticed her.

But, even the old Inuyasha was horrible at that. He always noticed Kagome. He remembered that facade being weak and tarnishable. At least, when it came to her.

Kagome all but kicked Sota’s shoes off, only one of her arms freed from his jacket as she crumbled to her knees and then, ultimately, laid facedown on the hardwood flooring of the living room. Her purse was lost somewhere between the entry hall and where she’d disintegrated, an arm beneath her head for some semblance of comfort.

She heard the sliding of socked feet heading her way, a mug she could feel the steam coming out of placed near her head.

“You good?” Sota nonchalantly asked, seeing as this was a decently normal happenstance for his dramatic sister.

“Mhm.” She hummed, but her voice was too high. He knew when her voice reached an octave like that, something bad had happened and she was just barely holding it together. Furrowing his brows, Sota stood, walking to the window facing their front yard to glance out with his own cup of coffee in hand. She was fine when she left, not so great when she came back, so it didn’t take brilliant deduction skills to determine something had taken place outside. And, when his brown eyes spotted the toned back of their neighbor’s son shoveling snow, Sota damn near choked on his sip of coffee.

“Dude!” He hurried back over, barely holding back his guffaw from shock. “What happened!?”

“Nothing!”

“Nothing doesn’t make you die on the floor like this. Did he see you?” He retook his squatting position beside his sister.

“Yes.” She grumbled into her arm, muffled as it was.

“Did he say anything?”

“I didn’t let him.” Kagome rolled over to her back. “I - I pretended I was on the phone.”

Sota glanced at the cell phone she’d left on the counter the night before. One she’d happily put on do not disturb so that none of her clients could reach her while she was finally taking a well-deserved break from the office. “But -“

“Yes, I know! I pointed to my ear like I had a headphone on!”

His sister wore the most mortified frown as she went from looking at him, to the ceiling, to covering her face with the one arm still trapped in his jacket.

“C’mon, if that’s all that happened then it wasn’t that bad. What’s up?” Sota asked.

“He’s so pretty.” She whined desperately.

“Yes, I know. A true Adonis of his kind.” He replied dryly.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because, I lack the sexual attraction to him that you have. So while, yes, he’s quite nice looking, I’ve gotta tell you, he just doesn’t do it for me.”

“Sota, what the fuck?” Kagome’s voice was still high-pitched, and she lowered her arm to peek out at him, doe-like and round. “When did he start looking like that?”

He arched a speculative brow, finally giving his knees a break as he sat back on his butt. “I want to say sometime between the last time you saw him and had this same breakdown and now.”

“Thanks, that’s real helpful.”

“May, he’s always been ridiculously handsome. You remember what his dad looked like? The dude could emasculate another just by standing within reach.” Sota paused for another sip of his coffee. “It was only a matter of time before Inuyasha caught up. And, I mean, he’s - what? Twenty-eight, right? The guy was bound to hit his manly growth spurt sooner or later. Can’t look scrawny forever.”

“Twenty-nine.” Kagome corrected, sitting up to her elbows. His birthday had actually just recently past, and he was a good five months older than her.

“Then, it’s about time, really.”

She felt the pout forming deeply on her face. She was hot. Her blush burned at her nose and her eyes, and she knew it wasn’t the warmth of the house chipping the snow flurries away from her skin. Pushing herself up all the way, Kagome crossed her legs and slouched over, digging her elbows into her thighs and burying her face into her hands. “I panicked.”

“You don’t say.” Sota remarked dully, slurping from his mug.

“He was coming toward me.” Her heart was still beating fast. Why? Why wasn’t she past this yet? “He was going to talk to me, and I freaked.”

There was a brief moment of silence, and she swore she heard the faintest, clutched snort from Sota’s nostrils. With that, she pulled her face from her palms to shoot him a look.

“Wait, I just want to make sure I’m getting this right: you two saw each other, made eye contact, he was on his way over, and then you were suddenly on a phone call?”

“Is there alcohol in this coffee?” Kagome swooped up the mug he’d left for her on the floor.

“And then, what? Did you at least make the call make sense since you didn’t talk for the first sixty seconds you were outside?” Sota laughed.

Kagome took a sip, wincing at the heat that hit her tongue. Realizing that the creamer wasn’t spiked, she quickly stood up and finally dropped the jacket, her feet patting against the floor as she quickly sped to the fridge.

“Kagome, did you pretend it was a work call? Or, were you pretending to be on the phone with me or mom like you usually do in uncomfortable situations? Please tell me it was the latter.”

“It was a work call.” She scorned, pressing to her tiptoes to reach for the rum Sota had put back on top of the refrigerator. He’d carelessly set it in the center, not realizing she was stuck at five-feet-two-inches, and her fingers barely grazed the glass.

“Right, because you aren’t that stupid.” He nearly wheezed, getting up from the floor and sauntering over. Easily, he grabbed the rum, taking it into the living room to place on top of the bookshelf that reached even higher. “It’s too early to drink this away, my dude. You’re gonna have to sit with this one for a while.”

“You know, I think I’ve been a pretty good older sister to you. I never beat you up. When I shoved you into the dryer as a kid, I only turned it on for a split second -“

“I tumbled!”

“I stood up for you when you were being bullied and even punched a guy out. And, I went and picked you up at two in the morning one of those times you snuck out.”

“What’s your point?”

“I don’t deserve your cruelty. Give it back.”

“No.” He grinned, ambling back over. “It’s time to face the music, May. You’ve still got it bad.”

“I don’t want to have it bad.” She pouted again, shoulders sagging and fingers delicately wrapping around the coffee cup Sota handed back to her from the counter. “I’m too old to be experiencing the same disappointment over and over.”

“What if you’re not disappointed this time?”

“Sota,” She turned to keep her eyes on him as he walked back over to the coffee pot for a second cup. “He’s married. If I’m feeling this way, of course I’m going to end up disappointed.”

He had no argument that time. He’d long learned when it was better to shut up, so Sota pressed his lips closed, turning back to her with a sympathetic gaze. The best thing for Kagome was to keep her mind off of it, so as she got over the initial shock of it all, he brewed a fresh pot of coffee and turned on the TV for them to sit in front of for a while.

Their mother had insisted on going grocery shopping the next day for ingredients to make a special meal on Christmas Eve, and it was imperative to go before the last minute holiday rush. It didn’t spare them from a crowded market, but Kagome still knew there was a significant difference between what they’d just walked through and what they would have had to shove through a couple of days from then. Taking the chance to grab everything they may need, including snacks and extra coffee so no one would have to go to the store again, the cart was loaded up completely.

Pulling into the driveway, Kagome’s mom hit the button for the garage that was clipped to her sun visor so they’d have an easier time getting everything into the house.

“I was wondering where your beater was.” Kagome remarked at seeing Sota’s old, black car sitting in the parking spot of the garage that typically belonged to the hatchback their mom drove. “Why aren’t you parked on the street like a normal person?”

“It was my idea.” Their mother giggled, pulling the key out of the ignition. “We’re more likely to use my car for travel anyway, so he may as well tuck his away while he’s here.”

Kagome feigned a groan as she threw her door open to get out. “The favorite child wins again.”

“May, it’s a nineteen-ninety-five Nissan Maxima. It takes forty-five minutes to warm up, and the heater smells like something was just lit on fire. The less I use it, the better.” Sota returned defensively.

“How are you still driving that thing?” She laughed, opening up the back of the car so they could start taking things in. “Isn’t it over two-hundred thousand miles? How did you even get it here from school?”

“By the grace of god and new tires I sold pictures of my butt to buy.” Their mother gave a throaty grumble as she dismissed herself to put something in front of the entry door to keep it open and Kagome released a sort of snort as she doubled over from laughing. “I’m not kidding.”

Through their joking, she’d missed the crunch of snow approaching a little ways from their side. “Kagome, is that you?”

The voice was sweet and warm, inviting. Kagome, still smiling widely from her laugh, turned to see Izayoi in her front yard, her son not too far behind her. Initially, she’d jolted. Her grin wavered and she was stunned with spiked nerves that made it hard to function through. But, with the woman making her way through the thick snow that was nearly up to her knees, totally bundled up in a coat that rivaled the thickness of a blanket, Kagome was able to swallow as much of her nervousness as she could. Of all people, Miss Izayoi didn’t deserve to be avoided. She was always kind and understanding, and having known her since childhood, Kagome held her in high regard.

“Oh wow, hi.” Kagome greeted, putting the pack of bottled waters back in the trunk as her smile returned.

“No way.” Izayoi, having the confirmation, made her way closer, meeting Kagome halfway with an unmatched brightness at her shock. “I haven’t seen you in ages. You’ve grown so much.”

“I’m pretty sure she stopped growing at thirteen.” Sota remarked, deciding to stay near his sister. Inuyasha had come up behind his mom, not opting to stand beside her or get in their space. His hands were tucked into his jacket pockets, and his amber eyes danced around in a careless manner. Almost like he didn’t want to be there. Nevertheless, considering his sister’s habit of collapsing on the floor in mental torment after any sort of near encounter with the guy, Sota wanted to be there to attempt to cushion any sort of blow. And, most importantly, stop his sibling in case she panicked and said anything humiliating.

“Sota!” Izayoi rejoiced. “You’ve been away from home for a while, too. It’s so good to see you two!”

“Mom, you saw him the other day.” Inuyasha mentioned lowly.

“But, I didn’t get to say hi, did I? Because, someone was in a hurry. Always in a hurry.” She said, unbothered and gleeful. Izayoi spread her arms wide, reaching for a hug from Kagome that the girl happily returned. Her gloved hands cradled Kagome’s face as she leaned back, gently pushing black, wavy strands away from her cheeks. “You have gotten so beautiful.”

“Thank you.” Kagome grinned shyly.

“How have you been, dear? I hope everything is going wonderfully for you. Your mom tells me you work hard and have your own place. You’re safe, right? And, healthy?”

“Oh, yes.” She tried not to stammer. It was getting increasingly harder to keep her eyes on the woman before her when all they wanted to do was flicker to the tall man behind. Talking about herself always sort of made her feel put on the spot, as well. Talking about herself in front of Inuyasha was suddenly more nerve wracking than she ever remembered it being. They lost connection so long ago that it almost felt like they were complete strangers now. Complete strangers with a non-erasable history. “Um, yes. I - yes, I have a little apartment, and I have a job. That I work. And, I really like it.”

“She eats her vegetables and everything.” Sota said, helping her wrap up that topic.

“You live in the city, right? Do you live alone?” There was a hint of concern in Izayoi’s tone.

“Yes, but it’s a safe neighborhood.” Kagome managed to say.

“I got her pepper spray for her last birthday, there’s a bat near her bed, and I programmed her Echo Dot to bark like a Rottweiler if she says ‘intruder alert.’ She’s good, I promise.” Sota added.

“The bat’s next to your bed?” Inuyasha asked with a judgmental grimace. “The hell’s that gonna do for you if you’re in the living room when someone breaks in?”

Kagome hadn’t expected the thick timbre of his voice when he spoke, causing her to look at him. Without hesitation, her brows furrowed with attitude to match his own. “Knives in the kitchen.”

“If you’re fast enough.” The half demon scoffed.

Izayoi swatted his stomach with the back of her hand, immediately silencing her son. “Ignore him. I’m so glad things are going well for you, sweetheart.”

“Mom, we’ve gotta go.” Inuyasha returned to his low voice.

“Any new boys in your life?” She said with a suggestive smirk.

“Mom.”

“Oh my god, Inuyasha.” She chided, annoyed. “How about you help them unload the car?”

“Oh no, that’s okay.” Kagome quickly deterred.

“Yeah, no, we’ve got it.” Sota rushed to insist.

“Inuyasha! Izayoi! Hi!” Their own mother joined them. “I see you’ve met my long lost children.”

Izayoi gave a laugh. “When was the last time you had them in the same place at the same time?”

“Technically, two Christmases ago. It’s a long drive for Sota, and an even longer one for Kagome, and we spent that one at her place. But, to have them here, home, is even more special than anything.”

“Mom.” He reached for her arm, but Izayoi shot him a look.

“Inuyasha.”

Instantly, he swerved, arm still outstretched as he sauntered over to the open hatchback of the Higurashi vehicle. He wore a sore frown as he did as he was told, stacking the two packs of water to lug into their open house.

Sota went to help him with a flick of his eyes that told Kagome to stay put. She wasn’t one to argue against that. Willingly put herself alone with Inuyasha? And then, what? Be labeled a masochist thereafter? Not likely. Not her brand of kink.

“Where are you two off to?” Kagome’s mother asked, slipping her arm in the crook of Kagome’s for a sense of closeness.

“He insists on going with me to my doctor’s appointment. You know him, too protective for his own good. Lord help him if he ever has a daughter.” Izayoi replied.

Kagome couldn’t help but duck her head at that. She reminded herself to remain nonchalant, so she quickly picked herself back up, holding her breath as she nibbled on the inside of her bottom lip.

“If you two are in a hurry, please go! He doesn’t have to help us.” Mrs. Higurashi assured, turning around to see if he was on his way back out.

“Oh, please. No. We’re running extremely early, are you kidding me?” Izayoi dismissed with a playful roll of her eyes. “My appointment isn’t until two-thirty. We have plenty of time. He just wanted to leave cushion for the icy roads.”

“Roads are pretty clear, actually.”

“I know that, but he’s not used to driving in this sort of weather anymore.”

“Stop talking about me.” He ordered gruffly, almost with what could be considered a whine for him. “I can hear you.”

Izayoi muffled her laugh behind the scarlet glove on her palm.

“It must be so nice to have him home.” Kagome’s mother said softly, relishing in the happiness on her friend’s face.

“It’s wonderful, really.”

“Stop.” He groaned, dragging the word out as he took more of their groceries inside.

“He’s so helpful. He does the heavy lifting, took me to Costco all the way out of town to bulk up on things, and has been doing most of the cooking. I’m lucky if he lets me help. But, I mean, it’s my kitchen. So, I do what I want.”

“Oh, I know how that is. We age a little, and then suddenly our children think we’re fragile. Sota won’t trust me to grab things off the top shelf anymore.” Kagome couldn’t help but give out a small laugh at that. Given their mom had taken a couple falls recently, she could see why Sota was a bit overprotective. But, their mom wasn’t old by any means, and accidents happen - even to Kagome. Especially to Kagome. It was endearing to see her younger brother taking up such a role.

“And, let me guess; he puffed himself up like the big, burly man he is and brought in the Christmas tree all on his own, right?” Izayoi chuckled knowingly.

“Actually, we haven’t gotten our tree yet.” Mrs. Higurashi mentioned. “We were going to do that tomorrow.”

“Oh, you haven’t? We haven’t either. I was going to see if I could drag Inuyasha to the tree farm today after my appointment. They’ve got the whole place decked out to the nines for Christmas, and it just seems so festive.”

“I heard that, too! They really went all out this year, supposedly. Why don’t you guys go with us?” Kagome’s mother suggested. Swiftly, Kagome’s head snapped over to look at her mom, eyes wide while she tried to cover her disapproval with a small smile.

“What?” She breathed.

“What?” Inuyasha asked stiffly as he approached again from behind.

“Oh, we’d hate to intrude.” Izayoi said cautiously, not failing to notice Kagome’s hasty response.

“What’s going on?” Sota inquired as he came over to the opposite side of his mother.

“I was just inviting them to go shop for a Christmas tree with us tomorrow. Please, it’s no intrusion at all. It’ll be fun.”

“Mom, they probably have their own plans.”

Izayoi’s eyes met Kagome’s, looking for her input. The girl was guarded, and she knew why. She knew why the once talkative beauty was so quiet after all these years. If she looked like she was ready to say no, Izayoi would understandably accept that answer and go with her original plan to sweet talk her son into going with her today. But, Kagome softened, dropping the tension in her shoulders as she met the woman’s reading stare.

“Are you sure?” She asked, and though the question was given to their family as a whole, it was more for Kagome to answer.

“You’re more than welcome.” Kagome said, and even she was surprised she’d spoken so clearly when she felt a fire rushing through her veins, and like if she wasn’t holding onto her mother, she’d shake so bad she’d fall right down to her butt.

“We have a Christmas tree, don’t we.” Inuyasha asked, his tone a little more on the urgent side as he made it back over to his mother.

“A fake one,” Miss Izayoi sighed. “Don’t you think we should get a real one this year? There’s nothing like the smell of pine in the house.”

“We’ll get a candle.”

“You stay home then.” She lightly sneered. “I’ll go with the Higurashi’s and get myself a tree.”

“And, who will lift it for you?”

“I can do my lifting myself, thank you very much.”

“Yeah. Okay.” He shrugged his brows in slight mockery.

“I’ll help her.” Sota offered.

“You’ll be too busy with your own tree.”

“Um, hello?” Kagome couldn’t help but gesture to herself expectantly. “There’s more than enough of us to make sure we get a couple trees strapped down to our cars securely.”

“Of course, if you’re feeling so unsure, we’re happy to have you along, Inuyasha.” Mrs. Higurashi sang welcomingly.

“And, if not, then no harm - no foul.” Sota countered.

“Knowing my mother, she’s going to want a ten-footer.” He rolled his amber eyes, bobbing to press more of his weight onto one foot.

“I do.” Izayoi scrunched her nose, speaking in a bashful whisper. “I do want a big one.”

“Then, I guess we’ll see you tomorrow. Let’s say around six?” Mrs. Higurashi suggested.

“I guess.” Inuyasha damn near grumbled.

“I swear, he’ll be nice tomorrow.” Izayoi assured, giving a small shove to her son’s shoulder to knock him slightly off balance. She gave what equated to a breath of excitement. “It’ll be so nice to be all together again and catch up. I’m really looking forward to this.”

“Us too!” Their mother spoke for them, giving a wave goodbye when Inuyasha finally pulled his own away. “We’ll meet you guys there.”

“Can’t wait!”

“Keep it together.” Sota muttered to his sister. She was holding composure, but he could see her eyes widening as she processed what had just happened. Releasing her mother, she walked back over to the open hatchback to pull it down and shut, and the tight press of her mouth told him she was seconds away from cracking. “Nope, give it another minute. They’re getting in the truck.”

“What’s going on?” Her mother asked, following them over. “What are we keeping together?”

She went ignored as Sota played as casual as possible for the sake of his sister. They could still be seen. “Let’s go inside.”

“What’s wrong?”

Kagome breathed out tightly, her expression twisting as she struggled with herself.

“Not here.”

“Oh my god.” His sister whimpered.

“Nope, keep it in.”

“Why aren’t they leaving?” Her voice that time was broken and wheezed, absolutely dramatic.

“Somebody?” Their mom tried again.

“They’re about to drive. Stand up straight, you look like you’re constipated.”

Kagome huffed out that time in a reach of determination, shooting her brother a confident grin as he did his best to help her with the act, wrapping an arm around his mom’s shoulders to keep her close as they made their way inside.

Izayoi strapped the seatbelt of the passenger side across her front, clicking it into place and adjusting the fit over her thick, winter coat. Inuyasha threw the driver side door shut as he got in, quick to start the truck and get the heater going so the tip of his mother’s nose wouldn’t be so red anymore. He said nothing as he got the directions to the doctor’s office up on the GPS screen, watching as the monitor zoomed out and then back in as it locked in place. There was no neglecting the small smile on his mom’s face, but Inuyasha applied valiant effort not to bring attention to it. It was smug. There was something else written within, and he knew damn well that without him having to say anything, she’d bring it up.

“So,” She spoke smoothly just as he began to back out. Inuyasha almost wished there was someone else in the car with him to place bets, because he could have just won a chunk of change. “What did you do?”

The half demon shot her a look, grimace apparent and harsh on his face as he silently questioned what the hell she was getting at. “What!?”

“What did you do to Kagome?” Still, she didn’t raise her voice or hold any sort of accusatory timbre, though the judgmental arch in her brow said it all.

“What are you talking about?”

“You told me you two grew apart.” Izayoi began to elaborate. “Inuyasha, I’ve gone to my high school reunion and had more to talk about with people I didn’t necessarily get along with back in the day than you and Kagome do. That doesn’t happen when you simply ‘grow apart.’ That happens when there’s conflict.”

“Why the hell do you assume I created the conflict?”

His mother deadpanned, dropping her head to gaze at him through her brow expectantly.

“Okay,” Inuyasha acknowledged that her silent point was fair. “But, I didn’t. There’s no conflict. There’s nothing.”

“Nothing?”

“Nothing.”

“Nothing.” Izayoi hummed that time, sitting back in her seat normally. “Then, you two will be just fine tomorrow?”

“Sure, whatever.” He said, shrugging a single shoulder lazily.

“Because, if that’s the case, you two will have the most catching up to do. So, we can just leave you two alone. You know, back to your roots.”

Inuyasha had to resist the cringe. He held his breath and scrunched his nose in a discomfited expression. “Stop it.”

“Stop what?”

“I know what you’re doing, mom. I know what you’re doing, and you need to stop.”

“What am I doing?”

“You’re fishing. You want me to break and give you the real reason that can’t happen.”

“Oh, is there a reason that can’t happen?”

“Mother.”

“Son.”

“Mom.”

“Inuyasha.”

He sighed out, the breath clenched in his throat to make an aggravated grumble as he pressed his foot into the break at the red light, and then dropped his head. “That can’t happen.”

“Why can’t that happen?”

“Because, Kagome wants nothing to do with me.”

“What? No.” She poorly feigned astonishment. “But, why?”

“I don’t know.”

Finally, Izayoi dropped the act, giving him the same deadpan as before.

Inuyasha repeated himself with more vigor, throwing his hands up exasperatedly in response. “I really don’t know! We never, like, got into some screaming match or anything. Things just sort of died off. I figured it was because I was a bit of an ass back then, but I didn’t expect her to hang onto that until today.”

“So,” She paused, taking in what he’d explained. Izayoi pursed her lips, analyzing the mysterious situation. She could tell Inuyasha was being honest. He was at as much of a loss as anyone. But, he also didn’t seem to be questioning it, either. “So, you two didn’t get into a fight?”

“Nope.” He pressed on the accelerator, following the flow of traffic with one hand on the steering wheel as it crept through the streets.

“No big blow up?”

“Nope.”

“Did you make her cry?”

“Not to my knowledge.”

“Because, Kagome’s really sensitive.”

“She’s not as sensitive as you think, actually.” He mentioned. “Girl’s tough as nails. She’s got a thick skin.”

“When was the last time you two talked?”

“Her going away party. And, even that was strange. We only stood by each other for like ten minutes before I snuck out the back and into my room from the window.”

“Inuyasha!” His mom fired.

“What!? It was awkward! She didn’t want me there, and I had a fuck ton of homework I would have rather been doing!”

“No, I remember you always leaving your homework for last minute, Mr. Photographic Memory. Even in college.”

“I know.” He concurred matter-of-factly. “So, that should tell you something.”

She was quiet for a moment. As much as Inuyasha liked to try to act like nothing bothered him, she knew what actually did and didn’t. With the way the fingers of his left hand were clutching the top of the steering wheel, she could tell this wasn’t sitting entirely well with him. He was curious, but he was also stubborn. He wanted to leave it alone, but something was unsettling him. Izayoi considered that it was her questioning, so she decided it may be best to drop the subject for a little while. They could return to it later.

“I tried talking to her yesterday.” He mentioned on his own, eyes on the road and voice low. Izayoi’s attention snapped back over to him. “Hardly got a word out before she faked a phone call and ran back inside.”

“Wait, what?” Her upper lip curled with skepticism. “Why would she fake a phone call?”

“So she wouldn’t have to talk to me.” He chuckled. “I’ll admit, small talk can be painful sometimes. She might have been trying to avoid that. I don’t know.”

“But, how do you know she faked it?”

“Oh, come on.” He groaned, grinning in amusement. “She didn’t say a damn thing until she saw me. All of a sudden, she’s on the phone?”

Izayoi grimaced. It was a pretty unrealistic cover up, she’ll give him that.

“I didn’t know she was coming, or that she was here. I was just as surprised to see her as she was me, but there’s a difference between the way we reacted. I was glad. She looked scared shitless.”

“No, that can’t be true.” Izayoi countered, shaking her head. “You’re looking too far into it, honey.”

“No, no. I’m not.” He chuckled again. “Mom, I’m not exaggerating. She ran back inside. I think it’s pretty clear she wants nothing to do with me.”

“But, why?”

He shrugged again.

“Don’t you want to know?”

“I don’t know. It’s been so long, why bother?”

“Because, it’s Kagome.”

“So?”

“It’s Kagome.” She reiterated. Her son’s facade was dwindling away. His careless smirk was falling, and he watched the road with a straight face now, a thick swallow bobbing his Adam’s apple.

“It was so long ago.” Inuyasha tried to solidify.

“But, it’s Kagome.”

She laid on the floor, having made it to the cushiony throw rug near the couches this time around. Kagome had managed to pull a decorative pillow from the sofa nearby, shoving her face into it to muffle her whimpers. Her mom sat on the floor with her, stroking her back up and down in a soothing motion.

“This is why we make sure mama’s always on the same page.” She looked to her son sternly as he ambled over with a cringe, kneeling down beside them to tap his sister on the head. Without looking up, Kagome raised her hand, blindly waiting for the shot glass she knew Sota had. The moment it was in her fingers, she pushed herself to her elbows, back arching like a dolphin as she took the shot without a chaser, coughing mildly, handing the glass back to her brother who’d taken one alongside her, and then throwing her face back into the pillow.

“Why did no one tell me?” Their mom pushed.

“We didn’t expect this to happen.” Sota replied. “You haven’t invited them anywhere with us in, like, ten years.”

“Eight.” Kagome mumbled into the pillow.

“Still!”

“If I had known this, we could have made it nine!” Mrs. Higurashi argued.

“Mom, why would you invite them with us if you knew Kagome and Inuyasha didn’t get along anymore?” Sota laughed, a small amount of exasperation visible in his hand movements.

“No one said anything about them not getting along. All I was told was they didn’t really talk anymore.”

Sota sort of ushered her to continue with her logic, even knowing this.

“I wasn’t thinking it would be a problem.” She frowned, lowering herself to her daughter on the floor to hug her backside. “I’m sorry, honey. I should have asked. I just got so excited and thought it would be nice, but I wasn’t thinking about your feelings.”

“It’s okay.” Kagome said incoherently into the pillow, sniffling as she picked herself up slightly. “It’s okay. This is okay. It’s fine.”

Sota pinched his lips shut tight as he tried not to laugh at his flustered sister. A small snort left his nose that was quickly silenced as his mom swatted his knee.

“I can cancel.”

“No, you can’t.” Sota said at the same time that Kagome shook her head. “It’ll seem like we didn’t want them to go. It’s insulting and attention grabbing.”

“But, we don't want them to go.” Their mom clarified slowly, confused. “Right?”

“No, Kagome just can’t handle being anywhere near Inuyasha.”

Kagome dropped her face back into the pillow with a wail, pointing to the shot glasses again. Her younger brother was quick to leap to his feet, scurrying back to the kitchen to get refills.

“Okay, wait. Honey. Sweetie.” Her mom urged, trying to roll her daughter over and pick her up to no avail. “Kagome. Love. I have to ask again… Why didn’t you tell me you still had feelings for Inuyasha?”

“I do not!” Kagome responded gutturally.

Sota laughed unreasonably hard from across the room, the cackle hoarse and loud.

“Who the heck are you trying to fool? Especially now?” Mrs. Higurashi asked with limited patience, giving a small smack to her daughter’s butt.

“Mom, it’s called denial.”

Kagome murmured something that was incomprehensible to their ears, completely muffled by the pillow she buried her face into. It was a wonder that she could even breathe like that. Their mother leaned closer, trying to gather what was just said, though unsuccessfully.

“What was that?”

Kagome turned her head to face the general room, no longer smothering herself so she could repeat, “How did you even know?”

“What? That you used to like Inuyasha? Please.” Their mom rolled her eyes so dramatically she nearly tipped to the side. “Are you kidding me?”

“I told you it was obvious!” Sota laughed, returning with their shots of rum. Kagome arched up again, throwing back her head to take hers much quicker than the last time. She flinched, keeping her cough in check as she pulled herself to sit up completely.

“Mom, you knew!?”

“Of course, I knew.” She stated simply. “I’m your mother. You think I don’t know your heart eyes when I see them?”

Kagome gaped at her brother.

“You were smitten with that guy the moment you hit puberty. I actually thought you two would end up dating eventually. Or…” Her voice trailed off as she cocked a look at her daughter. “Did you? Did things end badly? Is that what happened?”

“No!” Kagome said a little too loudly. She released a pent up sigh, sitting back against the couch to ground herself at least a little. “No. We never dated. Inuyasha had no clue I had a crush on him.”

Sota snickered. “Remember the days when it was referred to as a crush. How nostalgic.”

“Shut up.”

“Then, what happened? Come on, if you’re going to have a breakdown in the middle of the living room floor, at least let me know why I need to step over you for the remainder of the night.”

Kagome looked to her brother. Her one confidant in all of this. He made an expression that basically told Kagome it was her choice, but she also got the feeling that it could have meant it was justified by now. She slouched back a bit, pouting as she plucked up the courage to reopen the door that was well on its way to being pried at this point. What good would it do to keep it locked up anymore? Clearly, she wasn’t as past it as she had originally had the audacity to think. She was beginning to wonder if she’d ever be. Or, would she end up a fifty year-old with a forever affection for her once neighbor?

“Nothing happened. I just - I broke the rules. You’re not supposed to fall for your best friend. It’ll never work out.”

“Oh my god.” Her mom was quick to react. “Did you really believe that? Kagome, did you sabotage yourself from day one?”

“Yes. Yes, I did.” Kagome huffed. “I was a kid; of course, that’s what I believed. After watching so many people lose their best friends that way, especially if they were the opposite sex because of the pressures in high school, what else was I supposed to think? So, I tried to force myself to let it go, but it just got worse and worse and worse. I won’t even try to tell you how bad it got, because it was pathetic and it makes me want to cry just thinking about it.”

“Was?” Sota murmured in remark. Smart enough to bring the rum with him this time, he pretended he hadn’t said anything when shot a glare, refilling the glasses as if her were the bartender on duty.

“Awe, honey.” Her mom coo’d sympathetically. “You really liked him.”

“Yes. I did. And, it sucked. Every second of it sucked.” Kagome replied, throwing her fist into the pillow at her side in a tiny fit. “It came to a point where I couldn’t take it anymore. I felt like I was getting mixed signals from him, and it was really hard not to read into it all. When we went to college, I was grateful he moved away for his. Without him next to me all the time, I was able to let him go.

“Then, he was here for my going away party, and it was weird. I hated that it was weird. I knew it was my fault for being that way, so I wanted to fix it and get back onto some sort of friendly terms. I went to my room to go grab my phone off the charger, because I didn’t have my new number memorized yet and I wanted to give it to him. When I came back out, he was gone. So, I don’t know, I figured that was as good a sign as any that he wasn’t interested in reconnecting, and really, it was for the best. Because, I mean, look at me now. Can you imagine how much of a train wreck I’d be if we had constant communication again? If I had to be his best friend through relationships, and watch him be with another woman, and - you know what? - I’m okay without it. It was nice while it lasted, but it’s over.”

“Shot.” Sota urged her to take another, seeing how sad she truly was while running through it all. Kagome didn’t hesitate, tossing her head back as she swallowed the liquor that left a small burn in its wake.

“Okay, sweetie, I understand all that. I even kind of agree with you. If you felt it was best for you to part ways and move on back then, then no one has the right to tell you you’re wrong for that. But, what does that have to do with now?”

“What do you mean?”

“I know you still have feelings for him, but who’s to say that’s bad?”

“His wife?” Kagome grimaced. “I think she’d have a thing or two to say about that.”

“Who’s wife?” Her mom questioned, her head leaning to the side just slightly.

“Inuyasha’s?”

“Inuyasha has a wife?”

Kagome recoiled slightly, lips pursing with curiosity as she uttered her next words very slowly, “Doesn’t he?”

“No?” Finally clueing in to what Kagome was referring to, Mrs. Higurashi gasped, her expression widening. “No. No, he’s not married, Kagome.”

“He was engaged five years ago. When I was last here, he was right next door with a fiancé on his arm.”

“Right, yes. I remember now. No, Kagome. They didn’t go through with the wedding. Inuyasha’s not married.” Her mom assured.

Kagome’s mouth hung open. Then, shut. Opened again to show her silent astonishment. Then, shut. She turned her head to look at her brother on her left, watching his shoulders raise so high in a clueless shrug that he nearly knocked his ears.

“You didn’t know?” She asked him.

“Does this look like the face of someone in the know?” He returned. “No. For a while I was on a spiteful binge and hated him for no reason. All I knew was he hurt my sister. I didn’t care to hear anything about him.”

“And, I didn’t think you wanted to hear about it because whenever I brought him up in conversation, you’d change the subject.” Their mom said to Kagome. “I figured, since you never told me straight out about your feelings for him, you wanted to leave things like that alone. If all you wanted to give me was that you didn’t talk anymore, then that’s what I’d run with. I didn’t know you thought he was married and that’s what was hurting you this whole time, honey.”

Kagome had gone mostly silent, though she didn’t look relieved. This scared her more than anything. The most detrimental thing was to think there was hope for something that wasn’t even there anymore. It was Inuyasha. Inuyasha brought back those residual feelings, but the security of who they were together was nonexistent now. To feel hope for something more at this point made her feel sillier than when she didn’t want to let go during their hugs all those years ago.

“Don’t tell me that.” She whispered. “Tell me he’s married.”

There was silence. Her family was slow to give her what she wanted, and she’d almost pushed them to do it when Sota spoke, beating her to the punch.

“What if you’re not disappointed this time?” He repeated himself from the day before.

Kagome smiled. It was dry. Her brown eyes flickered away to stare at the mahogany coffee table before them. “I’m not stupid.”

—

It wasn’t an appropriate time to check in on her emails. It was past eleven in the evening, and she was holding a blissful buzz with another spiked eggnog courtesy of Sota after allowing her earlier buzz to die down with a monumental amount of water. Yet, here she sat, pajamas on, drink in hand, an old Christmas movie playing on the TV, and her laptop right in front of her on the bed. She’d hadn’t climbed under the comforter yet. She knew the moment she did, the damn thing would claim her life and she’d be down for the count, and she was enjoying the peace of the evening too much to allow herself to sleep at the moment. Her brother and mother were in their own rooms, and while she was sure Sota was the only one awake beside her, the sound of his TV still noticeable through the walls, the atmosphere was still holding serene.

Her fingers scrolled on the mousepad, careful not to click on any emails that actually required attention. Some of those had read receipts on them, and the last thing she wanted to risk were any of her clients thinking she was back from vacation early. All Kagome intended to do was rid her inbox of the emails that didn’t apply to her. Those mass emails sent out company-wide but didn’t necessarily pertain to her department. There were even a couple announcements that could be quickly read and archived. If she did this every few days, her inbox may be a little more manageable when she returned to work the next week.

A few light knocks hit her ears, and instinctually, Kagome glanced up to the movie playing on her TV to see if that was where the sound had originated. It nearly matched the low volume she had it set on, blending in, but she could have sworn the scene playing didn’t have any sort of knocks. Without a second thought, Kagome let it go, taking a quick sip of her drink and diving right back into her emails before she heard two more. Brown eyes blinked over to the window across the room on her right, doing a double take and going painfully rigid as she noticed someone looking at her from behind the glass.

He quietly laughed, the grin beautiful on his features, and Kagome could only stare as she settled down from the startle. Inuyasha used to sneak over in the middle of the night so often as a teenager that Kagome almost didn’t think anything of it. Almost. The reaction lasted no more than a second before she remembered how long ago that was and who they were now. Suddenly, she didn’t know what to do. Did she open the window and let him in? For what? What was he even doing there? Why was he smiling like this was normal? But, she very well couldn’t leave him out there. That would be rude, and he had to have come over for a reason, right?

Coming to, Kagome shuffled off the bed and placed her cup on the nightstand, freezing in the middle of the floor as she realized the bedroom door was still open. Now, she questioned which came first: the window or the door? She was an adult now, so she didn’t need to hide his sudden appearance, right? Of course, it was the middle of the night and everyone in her house would be tipped off if they suddenly heard his voice. Additionally, they would wonder what he was doing there and come to her room to see what was going on. Looking back and forth a few times between the two options, Kagome decided to shut the door, rushing over to twist the knob and silently latch it.

Heading back to the window, she watched his eyes follow her the entire time. Not once did Inuyasha look away, his lips parting in the center before the corners curved in the softest grin. Remembering how the window used to stick, Kagome used the heels of her palms to hook under the rim at the top, giving the window a strong nudge so that it would slide up.

The outside air was nearly torturous as it hit her midriff, stomach, and then chest, her arms wanting so badly to wrap around her, but she had to loosen the screen for him first.

“Jesus, it’s…” Kagome couldn’t even finish that sentence. Her teeth were on the verge of clattering, and she sucked in a sharp breath.

“I know. It’s cold.” He agreed, tone husky and low.

“What are you doing?”

“Came to say hi.”

Kagome stared down at him, blanking on what to say or do next. It was difficult to determine how to act right now.

She remembered him being a little shorter the last time this happened. His sweaters definitely weren’t so snug on him, and he rarely smiled like that. When he did, she distinctly recalled wondering if her infatuation was obvious, because even she knew she’d give it right back to him. His hair was so much shorter then, too. It was up in a ponytail again tonight, long, silver, and nearly blending with the snow beneath him that shimmered in the light of her room.

Inuyasha gave a small clear of his throat. “Brr…” He faked, reiterating himself. “It’s cold out here.”

“Oh, sorry.” Kagome snapped back, moving aside for him to climb into her room.

His chuckle was teasing and light, and he took the initiative to close the window as soon as he was inside. Her arms clung around her, protecting her chest from the sharp chill she’d been assaulted with.

“Why are you holding yourself like that?” He questioned, noticing how she was blocking her chest obscurely.

“I’m not wearing a bra.” She murmured, spinning around to grab the knitted cardigan she’d thrown on the back of the desk chair. Quickly, she shoved her arms inside the loose sleeves, ignoring his laugh as she wrapped the sides around her front to hide the evidence of her shiver.

All of a sudden, she was just standing there. Inuyasha slowly turned about her room, taking in the minor change in decor and layout, and Kagome was left to stare at him. What started off uncertain shifted into something warm. Something warm that she tried to force back into uncertainty, and it sort of worked. She was half and half while she gazed at his back, his shoulders, his profile. She was half and half as the quiet tried to take on a comforting feel and she just watched the way his large hands slid into his sweater pockets while he noticed the Christmas movie playing that she watched multiple times this season every year since it came out.

“Hi.” Inuyasha finally said, grabbing the remote on her bed and pausing the movie so she wouldn’t miss anything more.

“Hi.” Kagome matched the volume of his voice. She wondered if he knew how nervous he made her. She wondered if he could hear the beat of her heart, and if he could, would he wonder if the erratic rhythm was normal after hearing it so often as a teen? “What are you doing here?”

“Already told you.”

“You know, we have a front door.” She said with a playful smile that appeared of its own volition. “We’re not seventeen anymore. You’re more than welcome to use it now.”

Inuyasha chuckled, giving her a one-shouldered shrug. “Old time's sake.”

He backed up, leaning against the dresser as he took her in. She was uneasy; her body language said it all. Hell, he was too. It had been a long time since this sort of thing happened, and he was being bolder than he had in a while to just come up to her window expecting to be let in. This was the only way he could think to try, though. No younger brother to play buffer, no mothers in between, it was just he and Kagome right now.

“How are you?” He asked.

“I’m good.” She answered just a little too quickly, hugging herself a smidgen tighter. She needed to relax. Even before, she managed to play nonchalant better than this. “How are you?”

He’d almost bounded to the cliche response, the expected response - just as she had. Small talk was like second nature for most, and Inuyasha resisted the instinct to say he was fine. He was more of the direct type, much like Kagome naturally was. When Kagome meant business, she was straight to the point. He, himself, was notorious for how blunt he could be.

“Confused, actually.” He admitted, watching as she raised an eyebrow in response. “Maybe I should know the answer already - I don’t know. But, what is this?”

“Hm?” Kagome hummed in her own befuddlement.

“What happened, Kagome? How did we go from best friends to whatever the hell we are now?”

“We’re still friends.” She, again, answered too quickly in an attempt to cover from additional discomfort. It was dumb. Even she could admit her answer was weak and she was better off saying nothing, because Inuyasha scoffed instantly.

“Are we?” He asked incredulously, careful not to come off too confrontational.

Kagome was wise to keep her mouth shut that time, lips pursing warily as she notched her head slightly.

“I don’t get it. I really don’t. Again, maybe I should, but I’ve been racking my brain for hours and I seriously can’t remember doing anything to cause this big of a rift between us. So, can you remind me? Please? So, I can apologize for being a dick.”

Kagome felt something sour spreading in her abdomen, expression falling at his request. Was she doing this to him? Was their silence affecting him this bad right now? Why would he think he needed to apologize for something?

What could she say? Kagome hadn’t expected this at all. While he wasn’t appearing upset, she could tell by his broadened shoulders and the way he made eye contact just how earnest he was being. A part of her wall began to crumble then. Kagome held her breath wondering if she should get more mortar to repair the bricks that fell, or if she should embrace the vulnerability for the first time in forever.

“Uh-oh,” Kagome smirked cheekily. “You’re serious. The Inuyasha I knew never apologized.”

“Bullshit,” He rolled his eyes without vexation. “You’re one of the only people I ever apologized to, so give credit where credit is due.”

“Alright, alright. That’s fair.” Kagome raised her hands in reprieve, dropping the edges of her cardigan. He had her there. She was the only one he apologized to.

“So, what is it? What’d I do?”

“You didn’t do anything.” Kagome replied honestly.

“Then, what happened? How’d we get here?”

“Nothing happened, Inuyasha.” She hung her head, crossing over to the bed to shut her laptop as she noticed the screensaver come on. “We just - I don’t know - we just grew apart.”

He knew she’d say that. Because, he’d been saying the same shit. It was the easiest excuse, but it didn’t add up to him. Or, anyone really. It was cheap, and he couldn’t help but feel like he was missing something.

“So far apart that we’re faking phone calls to avoid saying hi to each other?”

“What?” Her attention snapped back over to him, embarrassment going from subtle to a heated flush on her cheeks.

“Come on, Kagome, you think I’m that stupid?” Inuyasha crossed his arms over his front, sneering knowingly.

Her jaw dropped but the only noises Kagome was producing came out as quiet guffaws as she looked around disbelievingly. He waited. One thing definitely hadn’t changed. Kagome was still sloppy under pressure.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She finally said.

“Oh, you don’t?”

“If you’re referring to the call I was on yesterday, that was very much real.”

“Was it?”

“Very much so.”

“Alright, then where are your headphones?” Inuyasha challenged smoothly.

Kagome spun around in place, praying that her mother kept a random pair on the bedside table. When she came up empty, she thought fast, covering for herself as she completed her three-sixty and was back to looking at Inuyasha. “They’re in my purse, and my purse is in the living room.”

“Ah, convenient.” He bobbed his head. He thought to call her out and point to her purse on the desk, but decided against it. It was enough knowing he had her pinned as it was.

“What is this, an interrogation?”

“I’m just trying to figure out how we suddenly went from Inuyasha and Kagome to Inuyasha - and - Kagome.” The half demon said, emphasizing the spaces between their names.

“Suddenly? Inuyasha, we’re in our late twenties now. This didn’t happen yesterday.”

“Maybe so, but I’m asking the questions I should have asked then.”

“And, I’m giving you the answers.”

“You’re not giving me anything.”

“I’m giving you what I have.”

“If that were the case, I’d have something to work with.”

“Sorry to disappoint you, I guess.”

“Fine.” Inuyasha threw his hands up to yield, pushing himself from the dresser. Dancing around the subject in circles wasn’t going to do anything for them. It would only worsen what they were currently struggling with, and Inuyasha found no fucking point in that. “If that’s it, then that’s it.”

“What?” She questioned, thrown off but how easily he tossed in the towel.

“I don’t know if this is really the truth - that we grew apart over night. Or, if you just don’t want to talk about it. From the looks of how uncomfortable you are, I’d say the latter. Or fuck, maybe it’s both. Guess I’ll just have to settle with that.” He shrugged indignantly, heading toward the window.

“Wait, but -“ Kagome shook her head, hoping it was a surefire way to arrange her thoughts. “I don’t - Where is this coming from? Why do you care now?”

The half demon let out a single puff of air from his nose, like an effortless chuckle to show ambivalence. Looking over his shoulder, he passed Kagome an expression of disbelief that leaned on the side of withheld amusement. “You’re an idiot. If you think I didn’t care about losing you…”

He didn’t even have to finish that sentence and the air was punched out of Kagome’s lungs. Her shoulder’s deflated so much that the large cardigan slipped off of one, bunching around the crook of her elbow. In an effort to save herself, she’d hurt him. Inuyasha wasn’t shy when placing the blame on others, but there were certain scenarios where he was more than willing to take the fault. This entire time, she’d thought their loss of contact was simple. She’d thought it could easily be passed off as a coincidental slip in time where they missed each other and then grew up. Kagome hadn’t once thought that he didn’t see it the same way, or that he’d remotely think he’d done something to cause this. Or, maybe the problem was, Kagome hadn’t thought of Inuyasha at all.

That was necessary, she felt. To move on, she had to make the decision to consider her own feelings. Only her feelings. She remembered it hurting to like him as much as she did with no chance of reciprocation. What was younger Kagome supposed to do? Hanging onto something like that would have been stupid. In order to let the version of him that she’d romanticized so much go, she utilized their busy college schedules and gradually… stopped.

With Inuyasha’s hands on the window frame, pushing it up to make his escape, Kagome was rethinking everything now. She didn’t want him to continue thinking he was at fault for anything, she didn’t want him feeling put down when all he seemed to want was his best friend back. Maybe not even that. Maybe he just wanted her back. Either way, the damaged and now-irreparable wall she’d stood behind around him was taking her resolution with it. Quickly. Her panic to once avoid being alone with him now turned into a panic that couldn’t watch him leave.

She sighed out audibly, feeling fed up with her own self. Her head fell back with a light groan, dropped forward so her dark, wavy hair hung around her shoulders, and then she peeked up through her bangs, blowing out a puff of air to clear her vision. Inuyasha’s attention was caught, mid-crouch out the window but looking back at her now.

“Stop.” She breathed, and with that left the last of the version of her that pretended she wanted nothing to do with him. “Don’t go.”

His heart gave a thump that both rattled and brought warmth. When she looked up, she didn’t seem quite so troubled anymore. Kagome actually appeared like she wanted to talk to him for the first time since her stay.

“Are you sure?” Inuyasha asked.

“Don’t go.” She repeated, a smile forming.

Inuyasha shut the window, hoping the chill hadn’t touched her from where she was standing. Kagome ran her fingers through her hair, uncaring of how her waves fell back into place as she crossed the floor toward the nightstand and downed whatever beverage was in the cup. The large, knitted cardigan remained hanging off of one shoulder, the color pastel and not matching with the red, flannel bottoms she wore, but still complimenting her perfectly well. He’d seen her in the most frumpy clothes while home sick with the flu before and still found her cute. Disgusting, but cute.

“Y’know,” Kagome began, leaning against the mattress at her low back, held high by the large frame her mother had gotten her long ago. “Old-time’s-sake-you usually came over with a snack.”

Inuyasha released a light laugh, appreciating her newfound, laidback demeanor as his right hand dove into his sweater pocket to pull out a sandwich baggy with three cookies in it. He tossed them onto the bed beside her, watching her face light up as she snatched the bag to indulge in one of his mother’s homemade recipes.

“I know the toll.” He joked, snagging the rolling desk chair to sit on backwards. “No entry without food.”

“Of all the information in the world, I’m glad that’s something you retained.” The giggle off her tongue was silky and Inuyasha felt a small part of himself relax. This. This was Kagome. This was the girl he’d missed so much. This was her without a guard.

“So,” His tone remained husky and low, dragging out the word until it died off with the last of his breath. “Did I really do nothing?”

Kagome climbed up on her bed, taking a seat on the edge. Her hands rubbed together back and forth and her shoulders hunched with the discomfort of the weight she’d put on top of herself. Telling him the whole truth was unnecessary. It would lead down a road of feelings she didn’t want nor need to unpack, and may only make him feel uncomfortable. It was avoidable.

“You didn’t do anything, Inuyasha.” She shook her head, looking him in the eyes as she said it. “I’m really sorry.”

“For what?”

For pulling away.

“For making you think that this whole time.”

Inuyasha disregarded it with a flick of his wrist. “Eh, fuck it. You didn’t make me think anything. If we really did grow apart, then it’s my dumbass fault for not realizing it sooner and doing something about it.”

“I could have done the same thing.” She quickly and blindly rebutted.

“Fuck it.” He repeated more resolutely that time. Inuyasha dropped his head, smooth, silver hair falling over his shoulder from the knot at the crown. When he picked it back up, he granted her that infamous, soft smile that caused her to hold her breath in order to prevent any sort of reaction. “It’s done now. Here we are.”

“Here we are.” Kagome echoed in a whisper, fruitlessly pulling her cardigan sleeve up to cover her nearly bare shoulder that her tank top did nothing for. The sleeve easily fell back down, a little too large for her frame, and she had no endeavor to put up a fight with it.

“We cool?” He asked.

“Yeah.” She breathed, letting some tension fall as another grin developed on her lips. “We’re cool.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yeah, I’ll stop being weird around you now.”

“Thank god.” The half demon dropped his head back in relief. “Tomorrow was gonna be really fucking rough if that kept up.”

“I’m surprised you were even gonna go.” She laughed. “It seemed like you were against it, too.”

“Kagome, you were acting like I was contagious with the bubonic plague! Was I supposed to happily hop on board the fun train?”

“Oh, I wasn’t that bad. Don’t be dramatic. It was more like tuberculosis.”

He sputtered out a laugh, lolling his head to the side. “Fuck you.”

“I’m sorry!” She urged in a hoarse whisper, trying not to be too loud. “I didn’t know how to act around you anymore!”

“Well, I’ll give you a hint: not like that.”

“Look, in my defense, the last time I saw you in person, you didn’t look like that.”

Inuyasha glanced down at himself. His arms opened wide in an extreme shrug before he shot her a confused expression. “Like what!?”

“Like you live at the gym and you only eat protein and vegetables.” Kagome fired, grabbing a cookie from the bag he’d tossed her earlier. “Here, eat some freaking sugar. You need it more than I do.”

He was trying so hard not to gape, a stiff laugh wheezing from his throat. “I go to the gym three times a week like a normal person, and I eat like shit. I’ve just got good genetics.”

“Unfair genetics.” She corrected, rolling her eyes and taking a bite of her treat.

“I’m sorry, are you…” Inuyasha couldn’t help the cheeky grin that formed, his tongue swiping over his teeth. “Are you saying I’m attractive?”

“No.” She lied. Horribly. There was very minimal effort put into it, really. “I’m saying I thought you were someone else for a moment and it threw me off kilter.”

“Right. Because, how many people do you know with dog ears on their head?”

Kagome let out a cheap scoff. “Like I was even looking at your ears.”

They both stopped. Kagome realized what she’d said and her expression blanked. Those words had just come out of her mouth. Where had her shame gone for that moment? Where was the little voice in her head that advised, “hm, maybe don’t say that.”? One minute, she was terrified to talk to him, the next she was admitting how alluring his body was. Apparently, there was no in between for her. Maybe that’s what she should have been worried about all along.

Though his smile only grew wider after the initial shock of her statement wore off, Inuyasha could feel his flush dangerously ignite. He’d been flustered only a few times before in his life, and it really took a lot to make him as speechless as he was, but this heat he felt now was creeping down his neck and over his chest. He was glad there wasn’t a mirror in front of him, because if he knew he looked as red as he felt, he’d be out the window pretty fucking quickly. This wasn’t the first time Kagome had let it slip that she found him handsome. In the eleventh grade, she’d forced him to go to the junior prom with her, and he nearly had a meltdown from the way she’d stared at him. Being the lightweight that she was, after a sip of some strong shit one of their friends had snuck in, she’d commented on how good he looked while taking the opportunity to fix the tie he’d loosened. He’d had to hold his breath to maintain composure, and it barely worked to prevent his inward scream of pining agony.

“What were you looking at then?” He mischievously asked, his recovery bringing out the impish side of him.

“Oh, dear lord.” Kagome grumbled nervously. Her brown eyes bounded to the ceiling as her head fell back slightly before she remembered she’d finished her beverage. With a little wobble, she slid off her tall bed, grabbing for the empty mug. “I want a drink, do you want a drink?”

He laughed. So hard, he couldn’t fathom a response past a nod. She was so jittery that it was impossible not to laugh. The girl was out the door fast, leaving it cracked behind her while the thick socks on her feet slid along the wooden floor in the hall.

She’d forgone the eggnog this time. During their trip to the store, she and Sota grabbed a little more than rum for versatility. Their mother, not being a drinker, griped all the way down the alcohol aisle. The rum and wine were for taste. The tequila was purely for reaction. Tonight, it was coming in handy. She mixed two shots each with glasses of strawberry lemonade, took a deep breath, and then headed back into her bedroom.

Inuyasha was standing with his back to her, looking at a few framed pictures at the top of the bookshelf in the far corner of the room. He glanced back as she entered with a small nudge of her foot to shut the door behind her, going right back to gazing at the professionally taken graduation photo. Kagome wore her black robe and sash, blue dress beneath, sitting on the edge of a water fountain with the cap she’d decorated with monumental amounts of glitter in her hand.

“I can’t tell what you majored in.” He mentioned, taking the drink she’d made for him with a notch of his chin as thanks. “Did you go for meteorology like you’d planned?”

With a small snort and an enthusiastic shake of her head, Kagome replied, “No.”

“What? Why not?”

“Because, I hate being wrong.” She joked. “How often is the forecasted weather ever right?”

“About ten percent of the time.” He chuckled, taking a healthy chug of the fruity drink she’d made him.

Kagome hummed, taking a sip of her own as she went back to sitting on the mattress. “Exactly. Those odds were not pretty enough for me.”

“So, what’d you choose?”

“Well, I played around with broadcast journalism, but ended up majoring in English with a minor in creative writing.”

“Oh, shit.” He was colored impressed. He should have expected that with how much she’d enjoyed reading back in their earlier years. “So, what do you do now?”

“I’m a developmental editor for authors.” She replied bashfully. Her lips had pursed minutely and she shrugged as if it were no big deal. “Was actually just promoted to which.”

Inuyasha smiled, leaning back where he stood and he had to admit that a sense of pride took over when she’d said that. In his eyes, she’d made it far. Kagome was too humble for her own good; she should have been boasting about her promotion, celebrating, meeting his eyes and saying it as proudly as he suddenly felt in her stead.

“What about you?” Kagome asked with a wave of her hand and a shake of her head. It was to dismiss herself and take the attention off of her; an ism that hadn’t changed from before.

“No, wait, wait -“ He tried, wanting to give her some sort of congratulations.

“No,” She whined, releasing a soft giggle mixed within. “Your mom talked about me earlier, you’re hearing this now, enough about me. I haven’t heard anything about your life. Please catch me up.”

He was reluctant. But, it was difficult not to give her what she wanted right now. Taking another drink from his cup, he leaned back against the desk next to the bookshelf. “What do you want to hear?”

“Everything.” Kagome smiled eagerly. When he wasn’t quick to pick up the topic, she gave him a place to start. “College. Did you ever figure out what you wanted to do?”

“No.” He chuckled. “But, I mean, I graduated. So, I guess that’s something. Sort of landed myself in the criminal justice field, and now I’m a forensic investigator.”

Kagome looked amazed, highly interested as she leaned forward in her seat. “So, what do you do?”

“Investigate crime scenes.”

“Like, a cop?”

“No, cops are the ones that call us in. You ever seen Law & Order?”

“That’s like asking if I breathe. Of course, I have.”

“You see the guys taking photos of literally everything, collecting fingerprints, bagging shit, so on and so forth?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, I’m the guy they come back to. Usually, I’m on the scene helping, but more often than anything, I’m analyzing it all in a lab. I help determine what happened during the crime using the evidence brought back to me.”

She wanted to go on and on about how cool that was. About how proud of him she was. About how she always knew he was super intelligent and he was just too lazy to truly apply himself. But, Inuyasha never really had a dream or aspirations growing up. He just wanted to get out of their small town. The money he’d gotten from his father’s passing, it went straight to his tuition. And, he left.

“Do you like it?” Kagome asked considerately. The degree and career may have been happenstance, but his happiness was what she’d considered most important.

“I don’t hate it.” He shrugged. “It’s what I’d consider to be a bit of a dirty job, though. You’re not always prepared for what you’re going to walk into. Even when I’m not on the scene and I’m one-hundred percent in the lab, what’s brought back to me isn’t always pretty. But, the bills are paid and I’m rarely bored.”

Inuyasha was only passionate about a few things in life, so she couldn’t have expected much more from him there. If his body language and fine-print messages remained the same, Inuyasha was telling Kagome that he was content.

“What else?”

“What else?” He repeated softly, thinking. He took a sip as he pondered, trying not to blank on the ins and outs of his life like one normally would when asked to talk about themselves. With the look she was giving him, he was sure even the mundane details would astonish her right now. It was a form of intimacy, so subtle and small, that he was now convinced only she was capable of. “I live in a city about eight hours south of here, have a townhouse, thinking of getting a dog or something, uh, and that’s about all I can think of on the spot.”

Kagome crinkled her nose. “I thought you lived closer. That drive must have been horrible for you, too.”

“Grueling.” Inuyasha concurred. “How far are you? Ten hours?”

“No, a little less.”

“Still more than eight. You poor thing.”

“My butt was thoroughly numb when I showed up.”

He chuckled, “Alright, your turn. Catch me up.”

“Hey, no.” Kagome argued, recoiling some. “I had successfully taken the topic off of me.”

“It’s not fair that you know every little detail about my life and I merely know what your career is.” Inuyasha exaggerated with a smirk.

“Every little -“ She gawked incredulously. “You gave me, like, three things.”

“What can I say? I’m not very interesting.” He shrugged carelessly.

“If that’s the case, neither am I.” She copied his shrug.

“Bullshit, you’re just annoyingly modest and hate talking about yourself. Come on, Kagome. Fair is fair. Give me something. What’s your cat’s name?”

“Why do you assume I have a cat!?” Kagome laughed, trying not to spill her drink as she fell forward some.

“Because, it’s you. Am I wrong?”

She feigned annoyance, avoiding his amused eyes. “His name’s Buyo.”

“That’s what I thought. Your hobbies?”

“Sleeping past seven and painting.”

“Painting? That’s new.”

“Not really. I started experimenting a few years ago. Of course, when we haven’t seen each other in five years, I guess you wouldn’t know that.”

“Five years?” Inuyasha’s eyes slanted and brows furrowed as he thought back. That was a huge chunk of time to get so wrong. “Try eight years.”

Mindlessly, Kagome kept going. “No, it was five years. Because, you were here with that same truck and - No, it was eight years.” She snapped to as she grasped exactly where she’d went wrong.

Oh no.

Looking down at the half-full glass in her hands, Kagome silently cursed it. Alcohol was doing the exact opposite of helping her tonight. As if it were spoiled milk, she quickly set the glass down on the nightstand, pulling her hand away in unmitigated disgust. She could recover from this. She could play nonchalant and climb her way out of the hole she’d just dug. So long as she stayed calm and collected, Inuyasha would have no reason to suspect her slip was anything more than such.

“You’re right, it was eight years.” She gave a short chuckle as if to mock herself, tapping her forehead with the pad of her middle finger. “Can you believe it’s been - I almost forgot my party was that long ago.”

Inuyasha wasn’t fast to respond. That didn’t make sense, something wasn’t adding up. Kagome had mentioned his truck. He’d gotten the thing just before coming out. Five years ago. Bright, and shiny, and new. He remembered this, because it was his first brand new vehicle, no less a truck he’d been eyeing for quite some fucking time. When he’d come home for summer break the year Kagome was transferring from community college to a university, he’d flown in. His crappy, nineteen-ninety, rusted sedan that his mom had gotten for him for no more than fifteen hundred dollars stood no chance of surviving a multi-state drive. The only vehicle parked in his mother’s driveway eight years ago was her own SUV. As far as he knew, this was the very first time Kagome should have been seeing his charcoal truck at all. So, how was she getting the two occasions confused?

“Five years ago?” His voice was gruff as he continued to ponder, leaning his seat a little further on the desk.

“No, I was wrong.” Kagome continued to try. “It was definitely eight years.”

“My truck…”

“I was wrong.”

Amber eyes darted to her then. He was right. It clicked from what she’d just said, and he was right. But, why was she covering something from him? All it was doing was making him more curious. “What’s up?” He asked suspiciously.

“Nothing’s up.” She responded, her voice taking on a higher pitch of anxiety.

“Kagome,” He pinched the bridge of his nose, shutting his eyes tight before sighing out and looking back at her. “You hate being wrong. You’d said so yourself not too long ago, and I’ve known that since I met you. Now, you’re just going to admit it? No. That’s too casual.”

“But -“

“Five years ago, what was that? What was going on that year?” He thought, brows pinching inward yet again.

Did she remain firm? Did she give up the act? It was hard to tell what the right thing to do was right now. It didn’t seem likely that she was going to be able to save herself, and it had her heart rate skyrocketing.

Remembering clearly, Inuyasha looked back up at her with disconcertment. Kagome was stiff, her hands rubbing back and forth over each other as her teeth pressed into the plush of her bottom lip. Her body language confirmed it all.

“You were here?”

Kagome swallowed thickly, feeling the pressure of the saliva glide down her throat. For some reason, she couldn’t answer him. She couldn’t even shake her head no anymore. The look in his eye, the way his brows hooded over them, he’d figured it out and she had done nothing but basically corner herself.

“No, you - you weren’t.” Inuyasha argued with himself, thinking of the logistics of her being so close without him knowing. “Your brother was home, but you weren’t around. I remember this. There wasn’t another car parked out front, and the two times I saw your family, you weren’t with them.”

Another thick swallow, and Kagome was having difficulty meeting his eye contact anymore. Maybe setting down her drink was the wrong choice. She should have downed it. There wasn’t nearly enough liquid courage in her for what she was about to admit. The disturbance in her abdomen was making her fidget more than usual, and she didn’t know how to quell it. Later, she was going to have a very stern talk with herself in the mirror about how she needed to learn some freaking chill and stop throwing herself under the goddamn bus. Other people are supposed to do that for her.

With a slow, deep sigh, Kagome told him the truth. “I was here.”

Inuyasha didn’t looked pleased. He looked bemused. Perplexed, even. This was troubling him. “You were.” He stated more than asked.

“Sota was still in high school, so he didn’t have a car. Mine was in the garage.”

“Fucking hell.” He said on a rough exhale, swiping his hand over his face. “How the fuck did I miss you?”

“I mean, you were a little preoccupied. It’s completely understandable.” Kagome said in meager defense.

“No. No, it isn’t Kagome. Me wanting to talk to you, it wasn’t spur of the moment. I didn’t see you yesterday and think it was time for a sudden walk down memory lane. I’ve wanted to talk to you for a long fucking time; I just had no way. If I had known you were here then - which I should have - I would have done something about it.”

Kagome was feeling hot. Her face, her neck, her shoulders, all hot. He wanted to talk to her. He wanted to see her. She couldn’t process that right now.

“You wouldn’t have been able to and you know it.” Kagome said, dropping her head to the side as if this should have been common sense.

“God, no fucking wonder you faked a phone call.” It was like a light bulb had gone bright over his head, the epiphany hitting him in the gut full force. “Apparently, I’ve been no better. You were right here, and I didn’t even pay close enough attention to realize that. Look, if you thought I was ignoring you, I wasn’t. I swear to god, I wasn’t.” He frantically explained, finally setting his glass down before his hand flinging to gesture toward the past caused him to spill anything. “I don’t blame you for wanting to avoid me after I probably made you feel that way, but I didn’t fucking mean to, I promise you that.”

No. Not again. Why was he blaming himself again? How did he not jump toward accusations with her? If it were anyone else, he’d point fingers and ask what the hell was the matter with them. She couldn’t take it. The guilt was overwhelming, and the last thing she wanted was for Inuyasha to think he’d done anything wrong.

This was on her.

“Inuyasha, you can’t see someone that doesn’t want to be seen.”

“What?” He questioned, confused.

Kagome released a guttural sigh as she buried her face in her hands, bucking up the courage to just get it over with. Her knees bounced a few times, so she pulled some tension off of them to stop, giving her bottom lip a good bite before she damned it all and ripped the bandaid off swiftly.

“You didn’t know I was here because I didn’t want you to. I was hiding. I wore Sota’s clothes so I could mask my scent from you, that I’m surprised even worked. At the time, I was interning for a really shitty company that didn’t want to give me my full, requested vacation off, so the only way I could come out here was to bring work with me. When my mom wanted to go somewhere, I used it to my advantage and said I had a meeting to Skype into. And, this is not your fault, okay? It’s not! I panicked, and we all know how rational I am under pressure. It’s just - I saw you, and I freaked. It was the first time in what felt like forever, and I was going to say hi because I thought I was fine enough to do so, but then I saw her and I ran. I couldn’t do it. I don’t know why. I mean, everyone moves on with their life, and we’d grown up, and I was really happy you were happy, but I didn’t expect you to be engaged. Engaged. So, me being me, I wanted to avoid the awkward meeting at all costs and booked it out of there. That was when Sota found out everything, so he was in on it, and he gave me his clothes to wear so that you wouldn’t realize I was -“

“Wait, woah, wait a second. What?” Inuyasha looked like he had a headache with the way he pressed his fingers into his temples. He gaped at Kagome, face twisted in perturbation. That was a lot to be thrown at him in the span of a rambling thirty seconds. “What did Sota find out? What do you mean, fine enough to say hi? Am I missing something here?”

“Of course, you are. That was the whole point.” She rasped, reaching for her drink to moisten her nervously-dry throat. Inuyasha stomped forward and she knew that look, instantly kicking her foot out and leaning back to withhold him while she managed to steal a healthy gulp before he successfully stole it from her. The battle was fruitless. He ignored her protest and walked back over to the bookcase to set it on top.

“No more until you tell me what’s up.”

“Give it back.” She grumbled with a pout, having followed him over. Her arms crossed over her chest, and he mentally counted down from three, hitting one right as she stomped her foot as expected.

“God, you’re such a baby.”

“Yes.” She didn’t even try to defend herself, still holding her pathetic attempt at what was supposed to be a scowl.

“I’m not giving it back. I’m cutting you off until you talk to me.”

She gasped. “Manipulator.”

“You just told me you hid from me. I think I deserve to know why.”

“I told you why.”

“Because, I was engaged?”

Kagome’s heart gave a painful twist, and she recognized the threat it posed to climb into her throat and make if harder to speak. She took a step back and ducked her head, knowing he took that as a solid confirmation when he leaned back against the desk again with a shallow breath.

“What’s going on?” He reached again.

With unsteady hands, Kagome raked her fingers through her hair, disturbing the smoothness of her groomed bangs in doing so. She could hardly put more effort into fixing what she knew was sitting in disarray past a small shake of her head to hope the force would help them remember their place. Too shy to make the eye contact he was searching for, Kagome tucked herself into her sweater and held on tight.

“See, okay.” She started stammeringly. “A long time ago, back in high school - oh gosh. Okay.” Kagome took a breath, nearly laughing at how ridiculous she was being right now. “You weren’t just my best friend, Inuyasha. Not to me. I was - god - I had the fattest crush on you. It was so bad. I didn’t know what to do about it. So, I said I thought I was fine to say hi because I’d figured by then the feelings were long gone.”

Inuyasha had to wonder if he was still breathing. He could feel it coming. The anguish was right around the corner at discovering she had feelings for him way back when and he’d missed it. She was always right there, right beside him, and he was none the wiser that she felt the same exact way that he did.

“Were they?”

“Yes.” She lied. She was stiff, and even she didn’t believe herself. “No. I don’t know.”

“But, you saw my fiancé?”

“Yeah.” Kagome breathed, unable to find her voice for that.

“And…”

“And, I hid.”

Inuyasha took a deep breath, grabbing his own drink and finishing it off. He bobbed his head a few times, letting the information settle. He didn’t want to stew in silence, though. His mind was racing a mile a minute as he thought back to every lingering gaze she’d given him, every gentle touch, every late night together where they spoke very little but enjoyed each other’s company, every hug, everything. It had meant something to her.

“It was pretty unfair of you to wear your brother’s clothes to hide from me. Everything around here smells like you. You don’t even live in this room anymore and I can still smell it from my house. It’s like searching for a needle in a haystack sometimes. Anytime I’m here, I can’t stop thinking you’re right next to me when you’re not. The one time you actually are, and you trick my nose into thinking it’s crazy.”

“What was I supposed to do? Fake a smile, pretend I was fine, and make nice just to please an old friend who I hadn’t spoken to in years?”

“No.”

“What would you have done?”

He went taut. What would he have done if she had a fiancé while he was still crazy about her? It was a topic he preferred not to think about now that it was on his mind. It made his stomach feel sour, it made a lump swell up in his throat. To think of someone getting to her first when he was too stupid to step up didn’t sit well with him at all. But, was he considering the idea for feelings that were around years ago, or was this relevant to now?

Kagome noticed he seemed uncomfortable with the question, and she instantly regretted asking it. It could easily be misconstrued to assume he’d ever had feelings for her, so she hastily corrected herself. “If - if you were in my shoes. You know, not like - forget it.”

To lighten the mood and dismiss some of the tension in the room right now, which was beneficial for the both of them at this point, Inuyasha reached up for her drink, bringing it down for her. She clutched the glass eagerly with both hands, taking three gulps before cringing from the strength of the tequila hitting her throat.

“See, that wasn’t so hard.” He teased. There was a deep shade of red on her cheeks and Inuyasha couldn’t tell if she was still feeling bashful or if choking on her drink had caused the hue. He had to admit, he liked when she was flushed. He liked when she tucked herself into a sweater too large, always threatening to fall off of one shoulder or the other, and he liked when she licked her lips to drag her bottom one between her teeth.

She sneered, ambling back toward the nightstand beside the bed, and drinking a little slower that time until her glass was empty. She may as well. It’s not like she could dig her grave any deeper at this point.

“So, you didn’t like that I was engaged.” He speculated.

She froze.

“Because, you still had feelings for me.”

She could tell where this was going. Was he trying to hand her a shovel or something?

“Or, may have.” He continued. “You’re not sure. Either way, how do you explain running from me yesterday?”

Kagome spun around on her heel, black hair flipping over her shoulder. “I did not run.”

“Jogged.”

He cocked a brow in her gape of silence, a smug grin developing on his face.

“I was on the phone.” She said meekly.

“We’ve already proven that to be wrong.”

Why was his voice so smooth right now? What was this deep hitch he was presenting? He needed to go back to his normal tone, because this was dangerous for her.

Still, understanding he was fucking around, Kagome pinched back an embarrassed smile. “Oh, shut up.”

“No, no. Tell me. Please. Enlighten me.”

“Why are you so hung up over that one thing? Obsessive much?”

“It’s perfectly rational to be curious about why someone may be avoiding you.”

“I don’t know. It sounds like I just hurt your feelings.” Kagome teased right back.

“My feelings.” He let out a light scoff, crossing the space to her. “Not quite.”

“Your ego?”

“Maybe, I just don’t like watching you walk away from me.”

Kagome looked up at him as he stopped before her. He was daring. Her heart gave an excited thump, and for the first time, she didn’t want to hide from whatever this was. In fact, the opposite. She didn’t quite know what he was trying to do, but she couldn’t help the challenge rising in her.

“Maybe you’re just looking at the wrong thing.”

Inuyasha chuckled, nearly defeatedly. Cheeky motherfucker, this one. She had him on that, but he wasn’t about to pull away. Just a few more seconds. They were within a proximity where their voices were hushed, and their chests almost touched. Almost. He wouldn’t touch her, though. Not yet. Not now. He wanted the suspense to drag her under again.

“Admit it.” His voice gave a small rumble from how low he’d kept it and Kagome’s lashes fluttered as she couldn’t resist the pull to glance down at his lips for the smallest moment.

“I thought you were married.” She breathed.

“I’m not.” He said.

“I know.”

“Things didn’t work out.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I’m not.”

“Oh.” Kagome sighed unsteadily. It was like the more he spoke to her this way, the deeper she got lost in a trance. His eyes traveled from her own to her lips and back, slow, the warmth of his golden irises physiologically affecting her. This wasn’t a game to Inuyasha, either. He didn’t joke around like this. She, of all people, would know. He was doing this on purpose.

“If you thought I’ve been married all this time,” Inuyasha brought a hand up to hover near the crumpled sleeve of her arm, allowing the heat of his body to radiate onto her own. “Why’d you avoid me now, years later?”

Her collar bones popped out a tiny bit further as Kagome dragged in a careful breath, chest and shoulders rising just a little. She didn’t respond. But, she didn’t break eye contact either. He knew the answer from that alone, and a satisfied smile appeared of its own volition.

Inuyasha leaned in an inch further, reveling in the hitch from her lungs. “I want you to think about what I said tonight. About your scent being everywhere. Think about it and let it sit. Why would I say that?” If he’d touched her in that moment, he would have been the one to fold. At this point, his mindfulness was heating the both of them. Inuyasha stole one last glance at her parted lips before fixing to take a step back. “I’ve gotta go. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Kagome was past the point of enraptured. Completely stunned, she’d almost forgotten to watch him as he headed toward the window. An admission she’d thought was bound to ruin things took a turn she wasn’t expecting in the least. While her stomach was completely jostled by the quick pace of butterflies flapping their wings and finding no escape, she couldn’t say she was upset by it. What was happening, she didn’t quite yet know the answer to. But, it was something she was eager to explore.

Her eyes flickered to him as he opened the window, turning to grant her one last smile. It was sweet. Soft. Sauntering over, Kagome returned it, stopping just before the window frame as his feet hit the ground on the opposite side. Silently, he grabbed the screen they’d removed for him to enter, holding it center so that she could fasten it.

“Goodnight.” She said, reaching for the top of the window, slowly pulling it shut. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

—

Anytime I’m here, I can’t stop thinking you’re right next to me when you’re not.

Even if he hadn’t told her to think about it, those words would have echoed in her ears all night anyway. It was all she could think about, really. She’d laid in bed, staring at the ceiling while the TV flashed colors and images over her walls, but nothing tore her mind away from what he’d told her. As she’d come down from the sensual adrenaline he’d injected her with, she began to overthink and over analyze.

Why would I say that?

“I don’t know, why would you say that?” She’d found herself grumbling in the middle of the night before grabbing one of her pillows and throwing it on top of her own face.

The only conclusion she’d come up with was one that made her entire body feel light and wobbly. Her heart gave a thump, and she wasn’t sure if she was willing to encourage the idea to stick around. At first. The moment she’d thought it may be best to push it to the back of her mind, she remembered the way he was looking at her. How close he was standing. How his hand had hovered near her arm and caused a wild series of gooseflesh to course over her body. He hadn’t even touched her, and she could feel him. Someone doesn’t just accidentally do something like that. She’d never seen that side of him before, but she knew Inuyasha was serious. She knew he wouldn’t toy with her. That was when the idea made home, roots gradually gliding through the ridges of her brain to stick around for good.

All day, she’d kept herself distracted by spending time with her family. The less she thought about it, the smaller her chances of malfunctioning before it was even time to leave. If she had, then she’d have to explain what had happened, and that was a whole mess she’d prefer to avoid altogether.

Most of their day was calm. They watched movies, got the decorations prepared, ate an early dinner, and then it was time to get ready to go. Kagome stood in front of her mirror, leaning in close as she blended her eyeshadow out a little further. Her bedroom door was open and her younger brother stopped in the doorway, giving her time to realize he was there before he walked through and startled her. A trait about him that she appreciated since she was currently putting makeup on her eyes.

“What do you think? How do I look?” She asked, presenting her outfit by turning toward him and spreading her arms out.

“Clothed.” Sota carelessly said, welcoming himself in and walking over to her bed. He was dressed and ready to go, hair doing it’s own thing, hands tucked into his sweater pockets with a beanie poking out at the side.

She groaned. “You’re useless.”

“Speaking of,” He guffawed, rolling himself onto the mattress and making himself comfortable as she went right back to doing her makeup. “You want to know what else is useless?”

“Hm?” Kagome hummed, not minding him anymore.

“Muting your TV when you’re gonna have a loud conversation you don’t want anyone to hear.”

Kagome stopped, eyes dulling as her mouth dropped open an inch. Very, very slowly, she turned to look at the extremely smug expression on her brother’s face. It was like her stomach was being held in place by two feeble strings and they were losing their knot, steadily dropping the organ lower and lower.

“No.” She mouthed, mortified.

“Yeah.” He returned in the same sense.

“Does she know?” Kagome asked, pointing out of her room in a gesture to their mother.

“God no.” Sota snorted. “She’s the heaviest fucking sleeper around, you know that.”

Her face was red, she just knew it. She felt so unbelievably hot that her eyes burned from the embarrassment, her nerves making her fight back a laugh. “Oh my god, did you hear anything?”

“Bitch, the moment I heard him in your room, I turned my TV up. Walls are thin, May. You think I want to hear -“

“Oh, ew! No!” Kagome lunged to smack him in the arm, missing when he jerked away. “We didn’t do anything! Why would you think that?”

“Oh, I don’t know.” His voice dropped to a mocking level. “Maybe because you’re twenty-eight and twenty-nine, are sickeningly in love with him, and the dude snuck into your room at eleven o’clock at night. If that’s not the makings for a good time, I don’t know what is.”

“Well, we didn’t.” Kagome scorned. “We just talked.”

“Is that what you kids are calling it these days?”

Kagome swung again, this time slapping her hand right on his chest. Sota clutched his left side, curling slightly in pain.

“My nipple.” He cried.

“We just talked.”

“Okay, okay.” Sota laughed at how defensive she easily got, rubbing the sting away and getting comfortable again. As she went back to finishing her makeup, he continued. “So, how’d it go.”

“Well, I guess.” Kagome gave a deep sigh. “We caught up a bit.”

“That’s it?”

“And, I let it slip that I hid from him when I saw that he was engaged.”

“That’s the Kagome we know and love. How’d he react? Did he blow a fuse? Get all butt hurt?”

Kagome looked over her shoulder at him, bashfulness hitting her once again as she remembered him standing so close. Sota sat up, reading her expression and his interest piqued ten fold. So, Kagome had pulled a Kagome, but Inuyasha hadn’t pulled a classic Inuyasha act? “How’d he react, May?”

“Very,” She paused, searched for a word to best explain things without giving too much to her brother, of all people. “Interested.” She thought some more. “Confused, at first. A little conflicted. But, then interested.”

“Interested?”

“Interested.”

Sota shrugged his lips, giving a bob of his head as he speculated. “So, it’s safe to assume today won’t be as awkward as we’re all expecting it to be?”

“I think so.”

“And, I can put the paper bag I have in my pocket back into the kitchen since you won’t be hyperventilating from being near the guy?”

“Shut up.” She rolled her eyes, putting down the eyeshadow to grab for her mascara.

“How are we gonna explain the sudden change in your attitude towards him to mom? I take it you don’t want her knowing he snuck in through your window in the middle of the night.”

Kagome nearly dropped her head, pulling the mascara wand away so she wasn’t in danger. “Fuck.” She breathed. “I may be a whole ass adult, but that’ll just lead her to wonder how many times I snuck out or someone snuck in when I was younger.”

“Mom’s not one for whooping ass, but she’d hand you yours.” Sota snickered.

Kagome whipped back around, giving her little brother the biggest puppy eyes she could conjure. He’d grimaced at first, but then eventually lolled his head dramatically. “Why do I always have to cover for you?”

“Remember, I picked you up that one time you snuck out in the middle of the night and mom never knew.”

“I was fifteen! Let it go. Get some new material.”

“Okay,” She smirked devilishly, perking up with a little too much enthusiasm. “You remember that one time you brought your ex-girlfriend, Shiori, over while no one was home and decided it was as good a time as any to take her back to your bedroom and sleep with her?”

Instantly, his face dropped and eyes widened, unmitigated terror taking over. Kagome pointed to herself with a little flare. “Well, guess who was home.”

“No.”

“And, guess who ran out the door as soon as mom pulled up from work, begging her to take me to the store and get some tampons so you wouldn’t be scared into premature ejaculation.”

“Kagome!”

“Eh, you were sixteen. You barely stood a chance as it was.” She flicked her wrist raffishly. “But, mom never found out and that’s all that matters, right?”

“Are you serious? You were home?” Sota implored frantically.

“Unfortunately for me, fortunately for you.”

“No, no. You can’t use that against me. I’m twenty-fucking-two.” Sota panicked, crawling to the edge of the bed nearest her. “I can’t get in trouble for sex I had six years ago.”

“Mom’s not one for whooping ass, but she’d hand you yours.” She mimicked, smirking.

“You son of a bitch.” He grounded out slowly. “You’ve known all this time, and this is what you want to use it for?”

“Yup. Always kept it in my back pocket just in case. It’s time to cash it in, buddy!”

“I hate you.”

“No, you don’t.” Kagome grinned smugly, finishing up her mascara and twisting the small vile shut. “Thanks to me, you had the best, undisturbed forty-five seconds of your life.”

“Fine!” He slapped his palm against the mattress, jumping down and stomping toward the door. “I’ll cover for you. Again. But, I’m putting every bottle of alcohol we have out of reach for you so when you come home and have your inevitable existential crisis, you can’t have any.”

She gasped. “Rude!”

“Oh, yeah. And, I’ll watch you wither on the floor like a fucking worm all while I stand on the counter and enjoy a few shots that you’re too panic-stricken and pathetically short to reach.”

Her gasp that time was deeper, louder. Sota smiled wide, nodding his head as he once again had the upper hand.

“Yeah! How you like them apples?” He gloated.

“You’re vile.”

“Thank you.” Sota hit her doorframe in his final exit, just in time for their mother to come over and shove in between them. Instantly, the siblings put on nice faces, pretending it was all an act so their mother wouldn’t ask what they were butting heads about. It was mostly normal for her to see Kagome and Sota play fighting, so she usually never asked what had happened to cause it anymore, but this was the time to really make sure she suspected nothing. From the both of them.

Before they knew it, they were zipped up tight within coats, their necks wrapped snug inside of scarves, and they were in the car and on their way. Inuyasha’s truck was already gone, Kagome had noticed. She wondered if they were already there and waiting on them. The sun was long gone, it was dark, and their mother was practically bouncing in the driver’s seat from how excited she was for the Christmas festivities. It was keeping her distracted, because right next to her, Kagome was wiping her sweaty hands along her jeans to keep them dry. It was a solid eighteen degrees outside, but she couldn’t help but be nervous and fidget a little.

Please let her be right about the message he was trying to send.

Strands of lights laced over pole beams and criss-crossed high over their heads to illuminate the tree farm they were welcomed into. Snow covered the field, glistening under the twinkle and adding to the magic-like quality. There were stands for different flavors of hot cocoa and coffee, fake snow was blowing in the air just over a designated photo area where a photographer looked to be shivering from head-to-toe, and Christmas trees were lined in long rows in the distance.

“Oh my goodness, hi!” Came an elated greeting to their left, and the Higurashi family all turned to see Miss Izayoi jumping up and down to wave. Inuyasha calmly placed his hand on his mom’s head in a feeble attempt to calm her, but everyone knew it was to no avail. This was the most wonderful time of the year, and it seemed their mother’s enjoyed it the most.

“Hi! Hi!” Kagome’s mom cheered, hopping her way over to Izayoi. “This place is gorgeous!”

Kagome and Sota followed behind their ecstatic parent while trying not to laugh, hands tucked deep into their pockets for warmth. She was almost inclined to keep her eyes low, feeling like it was a learned habit at this point, but a twinge in her belly had Kagome’s attention flickering upward to meet Inuyasha’s. There was a lightness in her abdomen as his straight expression shifted into a crooked grin, and without prompt, she’d returned it. It was the same one he’d always given to her since childhood, and it was the same one that had her feeling insane when she’d realized what it did to her all those years ago.

“Isn’t it! This has got to be their best year yet!”

“You two weren’t waiting for us too long, I hope.”

“Not at all. We don’t mind either way! Inuyasha doesn’t know cold, and I have a peppermint hot chocolate, so waiting was a pleasure.”

Kagome perked as she’d mentioned the hot chocolate, unable to control her craving as she spun around to try and locate the right stand she needed to head to. The longest line was leading toward the coffee, and the second longest was leading toward the gingerbread flavor. That boded well for her. The stand had to have been further down the way and Kagome just couldn’t see it from where she stood, and she’d even heard her brother begin to ask where Miss Izayoi had gotten it.

“I’ve got you.” Inuyasha softly spoke, giving Kagome’s shoulder a tap as he passed by her.

“Hey, wait.” Kagome objected just as she realized what he was doing.

The half demon graced her with a fleeting glance over his shoulder, that same crooked smirk curving his lips. “Go on. I’ll be right back.”

She stiffened. Watching him walk away with his hands in his coat, Kagome tried to remind herself not to get too carried away with his kind gesture. There was no reason to think too far into it. Or, grow timid. Or, smile like a freaking idiot. That part was probably going to be the most difficult.

There was a small crunch in the snow beneath her boots as Kagome turned back to face everyone else, noticing that they were silent. Their mother’s just sort of stared on with a hint of peculiarity while Sota grimaced with his hands held out expectantly.

“Well, fuck me then.” He murmured quietly for only Kagome to hear. He’d wanted one too, and she’d had to duck her head to avoid a snort from laughter.

She gave a quick clear of her throat, looking back to her mom and Miss Izayoi with the most innocent smile she could muster. Inuyasha’s mom simply dismissed what she’d seen with with a shrug of her brows, turning on her heel to lead the way down a different path.

“Alright. He’ll catch up; let’s go look at some trees.”

Following behind her, Kagome’s mother turned to her daughter and quietly asked, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah. Of course, I am.” She shrugged.

“Don’t say, ‘of course,’ like that. Not after what I saw yesterday.”

“Mom, he offered to buy her a drink.” Sota interjected. “If anything, this is a step in the right direction for them.”

“You’re not uncomfortable, right?” Her mom asked, casually pulling some of her daughter’s raven waves from the twist of the scarf around her neck so Izayoi wouldn’t turn around and think something was wrong.

“No, I’m okay.” Kagome smiled. “It was very nice of him. I think he’s just trying to be my friend again.”

“Yup. That’s what I’d call it, too.” Sota snickered.

“You guys are horrible at playing coy, you know that right?” Their mother remarked, rolling her eyes. “But, fine. Keep your secrets. Just let me know if you need a breather.”

She walked ahead of them, joining Izayoi so that they could wander side-by-side.

“You kept your cool.” Kagome’s younger brother mentioned, nudging her shoulder with his arm. “I’m very proud of you.”

“Shut up.” She mumbled.

“Our little anxiety goblin’s growing up.”

Kagome nibbled on her bottom lip, shrugging deeper into her jacket. “I don’t know if I’m supposed to be casual or flirt with him. I mean, it’s just hot chocolate. But, it’s Inuyasha getting me hot chocolate.”

“You do you, boo.” Sota joked. “Whatever happens, I can guarantee everyone’s going to pretend they think nothing of it. Miss Izayoi will save her questions for Inuyasha in private, and if mom asks anything - which I doubt she will - we’ll tell her he came over to talk. Through the front door.”

Swiftly, Kagome slapped her palm to her forehead. “The front door.” She repeated in a cry. Such a simple explanation, and she’d completely failed to think of it. She’d even brought it up to Inuyasha last night. Rookie mistake.

“That’s right, homie.” He laughed, skipping joyously next to her to tease. “You cashed in some blackmail for some basic level shit. What would you do without me?”

The incoming crunch of snow from behind prevented Kagome from responding with the sass already equipped on her tongue, looking over to Inuyasha approaching with a cup in hand. Sota kept walking while Kagome stopped to wait, her lips curving upward in greeting.

“That was fast.”

He shrugged, holding the cocoa out for her. “Both hands. It’ll keep them warm for a while.”

“Thank you.” She said, doing as he recommended. “How much do I owe you?”

He smiled at that, looking ahead as they walked behind everyone. “Nothing.”

“The stands say two dollars.”

“And, I said nothing.” He repeated smoothly with a quick glance down at her. “You still like whipped cream, right?”

She gleamed, blowing into the small sip hole of the top covering her disposable, green cup. “I will never not like whipped cream.”

“Good.”

They fell into a comfortable silence, walking directly next to each other while they watched their mom’s jump back and forth from trees. They spun around them to evaluate thickness, dryness, height, and even debated on their preference of type - from various pines to various firs. Sota had knocked back a few jokes to compare their love of this holiday to that of a Who from How the Grinch Stole Christmas, but it was quickly turned on him as soon as he lit up with excitement at the sight of actual reindeer pulling a sleigh with Santa on it.

There was a barn in the distance, glowing with warm lights that pulled Kagome’s attention. It was clearly where the checkout was for whatever tree had been chosen by families, but there was a welcome sign just next to it that had Kagome stopping to try and determine what it led to from where she stood in between trees.

“What?” Inuyasha asked, noticing she wasn’t next to him anymore.

“What is that?” It looked like there was a huge section of decorated trees that people were strolling through.

“Don’t know.”

“Want to check it out?” She unthinkingly asked. Her nerves gave her a little jolt as if to bring her back to the present. Was that too bold? It was clear she wasn’t inviting anyone else; only him. When she’d looked over, he was already on his way to her, a simple grin on his face as he gave a nod.

She was happy. Sparing a glance toward her brother to signal that they were leaving the group so someone knew they weren’t to be reported as missing persons, Kagome kept up with Inuyasha. The sleeves of their jackets rubbed slightly as they stayed close, and she had to admit that this was substantially more comfortable than she’d expected earlier.

She was right. There was a large maze of trees, each one decorated with different types of ornaments, garland, and ribbons. It was like a Christmas wonderland they were now walking through, groups spread out and paced so no one was bumping into each other or interrupting the spectacle that had everyone in awe. The lights of the trees were dimmed, creating an incredibly intimate aesthetic that had Kagome’s head turning left and right in amazement. Nothing was too in-your-face or blinding. It was beautiful and serene, with the very, very light hint of classic Christmas music playing over the speakers near the barn that they steadily traveled away from.

“This way, dummy.” Inuyasha said as he grabbed the waist of her coat to pull her along with him in his direction. There was a fork in the road signaled by a red and white “north pole,” but she’d almost walked straight into it, too distracted by everything around her. Inuyasha had chosen, what he’d observed to be, the less traveled route. Everyone was going right because there was a perfectly, and conveniently, placed cocoa stand. Kagome already had some in her hands. It worked out in his benefit.

She giggled, not fighting his yank at all. Their boots were the only ones in this direction making any noise along the packed ice beneath them. Inuyasha walked quietly next to her. There were a mixture of red, green, and blue lights among the whites and golden, and she secretly admired the way it bounced off the sheen of his silver hair. He’d never appreciate being called beautiful. But, she thought that of him. Especially when he looked as content as he did now. He hardly had any sort of expression written on his face, but his body language, the way he spared small glances toward her, the way he matched her pace, it said it all.

“I never got the chance to ask you,” She began, clutching her drink a little tighter within both hands to absorb the heat. Maybe what she was about to mention would put him off, and she was nervous about that, but this was something she’d rather know than avoid. “Are you upset? That I hid from you five years ago?”

Inuyasha hadn’t expected that. His brows twitched inward as he looked down at her. He was surprised she wasn’t staring at the ground then. Kagome was meeting his eyes, looking for his honest answer. “Where’d that come from?”

“Well, I was a little confused by your response yesterday. I thought about what you’d said, like you’d told me. Obviously, not for the reason you’d intended, but something stuck out. You’d called me unfair. While I understand where you were coming from, I wanted to know if there was anything else.”

He licked his lips, cocking a small grin. “Why does that matter?”

Kagome stopped, gathering his undivided attention as he took two more steps before turning around to face her. “It matters.” She said. “I just want you to know that it wasn’t meant to hurt you. You weren’t supposed to find out.” Kagome sort of chuckled at herself.

Inuyasha looked to the side, having to momentarily distract himself from what her stare was doing to him. Sure, anyone could choose to be upset about something like that, but she’d made it perfectly clear as to why she’d done it. Inuyasha couldn’t hold it over her head even if he’d wanted to. “If I’d seen you with a fiancé of your own, I’d have reacted worse.”

It was simultaneously an answer to her recent question, and an answer to the one she’d asked the night before. Kagome swallowed thickly, feeling struck by his sincerity. He took a step in, the silence in the air not the least bit discomfiting. The music from the barn was barely noticeable from where they stood, giving them a sense of privacy and peace.

“I’m not even a little bit upset.”

“You promise?” Kagome breathed.

“Have you been worried about that all night?”

“No.” She said honestly.

“Good. Because, as you well know, that’s not what I wanted you to think about.” Inuyasha chuckled. His hands were tucked within his jacket pockets, and he leveraged out his elbow for Kagome to hook her arm through if she’d wanted. He was glad that, despite her bashful smile, she took the offer.

Her eyes wandered up to him again as they walked along. She wanted to lean further against him, but she held back. It was so difficult to push past the nerves serving as a blockade to do even the simplest of gestures. Was his heart beating as fast as hers was? She wished she could hear it. She wished he didn’t speak so indirectly and came right out with what he wanted her to know. She wouldn’t reject it. He knows she wouldn’t reject it. That much, she understood by now.

Sensing her, Inuyasha tucked her arm closer into his side, glancing down at her. “Are you warm enough?” His timbre was husky, sweet.

Almost losing her train of thought, Kagome could only muster up a nod in response. When did Inuyasha become this bold? And, confident? She had to admit, this was a huge difference from what she’d grown up with. He could have easily been described as emotionally stunted way back then. Of course, being engaged once should mean that he’d figured it out somewhere along the way.

“You’d said this wasn’t the first time you’d wanted to talk to me - when you saw me the other day.”

“Yeah.” Inuyasha confirmed, leading her through the maze.

“What would you have told me?”

“Hi.” He laughed, slowing her down as their route finally merged with the other they’d parted from. There was a group of teenagers he let slip before them, tuning out their loud antics as they excitedly pointed out everything they saw.

“No,” Kagome giggled, pulling on his arm a little in a meager sense to get him to be serious. “What would you have told me?”

“What are you on about?” Inuyasha chuckled again, giving her another yank closer into his side.

“What would you have told me? Like, what did you want to say?”

“It’s not like I had some speech planned, if that’s what you’re thinking. I just wanted to see you again.”

“And, if you had sooner, what would you have told me?”

He was blushing. Just a little, but she could see it as their route was nearing the back entrance of the barn they’d ended up looping around. The lights were hitting his face perfectly to show her, but he wasn’t necessarily uncomfortable about it. He was still smiling, giving her his attention and completely ignoring the uproar of the teenagers before them.

“I don’t know.” He admitted. “I’ve always been a make it up as you go along kind of guy.”

That was true. Inuyasha definitely wasn’t a planner. He was too impatient for that sort of thing.

“Okay. Then, what did you want to tell me two days ago?” Kagome boldly asked, holding his eye contact.

“That I missed you. That I -“

A small cheer met their ears as they just barely entered the barn, ripping his attention away from the girl he held to see a woman dressed as an elf nearby pointing right above them. A few of the teenagers had stuck around in the distance, having clearly made it a game to wait and see if he and Kagome would notice in time and separate like everyone else hastily had. He hadn’t been paying attention. Their group had been wild because they were trying not to get stuck under the mistletoe together.

Son of a mother fucking bitch.

“You gotta do it! It’s the rules!” The elf cajoled too happily, and it was all Inuyasha could do not to outwardly groan.

Yes, he wanted to kiss Kagome. Of course, he wanted to fucking kiss her. But, it was something he wanted to be a little less forced than this - as he felt was reasonable for anyone in his shoes. Kagome hadn’t said a word at his side, and he peered down, noticing how goddamn red she was. She’d only met his eyes for a moment, glancing around the room awkwardly as an elderly couple gingerly snickered their way.

If he pulled her out of there and ignored everyone as he felt he should, he risked sending her the wrong memo. If he rolled with the punches, he risked ruining the momentum of genuineness. Inuyasha was beginning to feel too much pressure building up, and he did a quick bob from one foot to the other. What he found he was more afraid of in that moment was messing with Kagome’s head. She was asking these questions for a reason. She wanted to know what he was feeling. What they had, it was fresh. It was fragile. It was way too easy to fuck things up right now, and then he’d have to start right back at square one. They were too limited on time to add more mistakes to fix.

Before he made a move though, he needed to make sure Kagome was okay with it. And, if that stupid, middle-aged elf urged him one more goddamn time before he was able to do so, he was going to punt her out of the way. Inuyasha released Kagome’s arm with a deep and stiff sigh, looking down at her. She returned his gaze, but it was obvious she was incredibly nervous.

“We don’t have to.” Inuyasha mentioned.

Her brown eyes flickered up to the mistletoe. She wasn’t opposed, she just didn’t like being under a spotlight. But, she wasn’t opposed. Definitely not. It was just difficult for her to communicate that, or even make the move on her own. All she could do was give him a small shrug, a shuddering breath, and a careful smile that left the choice up to him. She could only hope it was obvious which option she’d wanted him to choose.

Something came over him then. The noise of the elf, the teenagers, and everyone else minding their own business around them faded out, and Inuyasha only recognized her. Kagome. His thumb grazed the soft line of her jaw as his hand reached to curl around the nape of her neck, pulling her to meet him halfway as he leaned forward to kiss her. Her lips were delicate. Her breath was warm. His heart stopped. Pulling away was now the hardest thing he’d ever had to do in his life, and it took striving effort not to remember people were watching - sparsely clapping, even - and others were coming down the path.

It was the clapping that did him over. It quickly took him out of his reverie, and Inuyasha could hardly hide the tidal wave of embarrassment. His hand slipped down to grab hers, forcefully pulling her out of the barn altogether. He guided her over to an icy stack of hay bales on the far side where no one was, letting her go as he released his pent up aggravation on the snow atop that was thick enough to fight back.

“That -“ He hit again. “- was not - “ And, again. “- supposed -“ Once more. “- to happen like that.”

Kagome had been poorly resisting it, but her battle was fruitless. She sputtered out a guttural laugh, so hard it had her gradually folding over.

“What the hell is so funny!?”

She couldn’t even answer she was laughing so hard. God, it was about freaking time.

“Hey!” Inuyasha pulled her to stand up straight, grabbing the sides of her face as he jostled her a little. Her laughter was contagious and he was already cracking, an incredulous smile forming on his face. “The hell are you fucking laughing at!?”

“I was wondering where you were.” Kagome said, playfully shoving him off of her. “You can only stay cool and collected for so long before you lose your shit.”

“Excuse me, I’ve matured since you last saw me. Thank you.” He retorted.

“Oh, I’m not doubting that. But, you’re still Inuyasha.”

“And, you’re still a punk ass.”

“What? You’ve gone three days without yelling, as far as I know! I was beginning to fear I’d lost you for good!”

“Oh, there are so many fucking things I can say to get back at you, but I won’t! I won’t!”

“Why?” She teased. “Because, you’re the ‘bigger person’ now?”

“Not quite. I just don’t want you getting so nervous that you run off again.” Inuyasha had flexed his jaw, his heart rate stabilizing as her smile grew wider. She was cheeky and playful, and her flush was still evident, but she wasn’t pulling away from him. In fact, when he’d reached for her hand, she’d stepped inward to give it to him.

“Make sure you’re actually watching this time.”

“Uh-uh.” He hummed low, looking her dead in the eyes. “I’m not letting -“

“There you are.”

Their hands were separated in an instant and both she and Inuyasha were turning to see their group walking over to them. They acted as casual as possible, but Kagome was stuck with the giggles. He’d kissed her. It was short, and it was simple, but it lingered and Kagome swore she could still feel his lips. It wasn’t enough to say she was happy or excited. Kagome was unequivocally exhilarated.

“Shut up.” Inuyasha ground out toward her, holding no venom in his tone as he shoved her away.

“We’ve been looking for you.” His mother commented, sharing a smile at their lightheartedness. “Where’d you go?”

“Through the tree maze.” He gestured behind him with a point of his thumb.

“Well, since you weren’t around, I chose our tree all by myself. The nice boys are getting it netted for us.”

Inuyasha grimaced. “Mom, how large is it?”

Izayoi grinned sheepishly, giving minimal effort to her shrug.

“Mother. How large is it?” Inuyasha repeated, more stern that time.

“It took three guys.” Sota informed with straight, pressed lips.

“Goddammit.” The half demon grumbled.

“I have high ceilings. It’ll fit.” His mom said innocently, following after her son as he went to go see the one she’d chosen.

—

It was late, but it’d taken much longer than she’d expected to get the Christmas tree screwed into the base to stand evenly, and then decorate it. Sota and her mom had chosen a huge, bushy, some-kind-of fir that looked perfect under twinkling lights with red and gold ribbon layered around it. Ornaments were added, and Sota was not too happy that their mother had chosen a table chair, of all things, to stand on in order to get the star on top.

Past midnight now, Kagome was finally out of her jeans and donning some comfortable and cozy leggings. A black, long sleeved crop top dressed her torso with the very bottom of her sports bra poking out from beneath. She’d debated brushing the tangles out of her hair, but decidedly let it wave in its own frenzy for now, thinking it more important to find something to watch on TV first.

Inuyasha had been impatiently waiting for the living room light in her house to go out. Upon taking out the trash earlier, he’d seen through her front window. They were decorating the tree with loud music playing, and he’d noticed the smile on her face. The way she held her wine glass high up in the air when it seemed they were toasting to something, and she laughed and ran from her brother, it had him realizing that he’d long passed smitten years ago. He’d left it behind at their junior prom.

As soon as he felt he was clear, Inuyasha couldn’t resist the temptation any longer. He headed over to his childhood best friend’s house, listening carefully to see if anyone was talking in her room with her. She was alone, the light within coming from both the bedside lamp and the television. With just a few light knocks to her window, Kagome turned to see him, knowing exactly where to look for the source of the noise.

A welcoming grin developed on her lips, and she set the TV remote down on her bed, ambling over to the window to open it. The screen was skillfully loosened, and Kagome took a few steps back to allow the half demon to enter, briefly checking behind her to make sure she had, in fact, shut the door earlier.

“Hi.” He whispered after closing the window.

“Hi.” She said right back.

Inuyasha took her in. Her hair looked silky, the long, black strands doing nothing but inviting his fingers to rake through it all. Her attire was laid back, fitting to her form in a manner that had him pathetically mesmerized. Her lips, the plush of them, after tasting them earlier, did nothing but make it hard to concentrate.

“The reason I never asked you sooner,” He spoke, keeping his voice low. “About why we grew apart… It was because I thought it was my fault. You know better than anyone that I sucked at vocalizing my feelings when I was younger. I was jealous of almost anyone that stole your attention, and I was horrible at hiding that. And, when you’d tell me it wasn’t a big deal, I’d get mad about it. I was overbearingly protective, I annoyed you, I’m pretty sure I called you ugly once and made you cry, and I just thought you’d had enough. I never asked because I didn’t want to hear it. I’m pretty sure hearing how shitty I was from you would have been the one thing that broke me. So, I let it happen instead.”

Kagome’s shoulders had almost deflated. Everything he thought, it was all wrong. It was the exact opposite. “I liked that, actually.” She admitted. “All of it. Too much. I thought I was reading too far into everything, so when you left for college, I pulled away.”

“Why?”

“To move on.”

Inuyasha chuckled, the sound nothing but a breath leaving his lungs, and he licked his lips. “How’d that work out for you?”

“Just about as well as it did for you.”

He moved inward until he was mere inches away, his hand rising slowly as the backs of his fingers gently grazed up the sides of Kagome’s arms. “I never wanted it in the first place.” He rumbled. “I wanted you.”

“What would you have said to me?” She repeated her question from earlier, taking a loose grip on the sides of his sweater.

Steadily, Inuyasha cradled her jaw, leaning down to skillfully ghost his lips over her own. She was so warm, he could have easily lost composure. He felt her fingers curl tighter into his clothes, pulling him a little closer, and he instantly obliged. As their lips met, Inuyasha felt astonishingly more grounded than he ever had in his life. There was a buzzing behind his sternum, but it was invigorating, sending warmth to course through his veins and ignite a fire in his belly that he’d never before felt.

He pulled away, feeding her adventurous mouth with the few more kisses it sought before he was able to gaze down at her. Even in the dim lighting of the bedroom, she was breathtaking. Inuyasha couldn’t help be caress her cheeks with an unmatched softness he’d never given to another person before.

“That’s how it should have been done in the first place.” He remarked.

Kagome couldn’t speak. So captivated by him, she was stuck using her hands to communicate. She gave a gentle nudge for his palms to drop, feeling them wrap behind the small of her back as she pulled him down to kiss her again. Their enthusiasm soared, his lips heatedly took control of their pace. Leveraging her up, Kagome took her cue to wrap her legs around his hips, feeling him go to grip her thighs one at a time. She was gently lowered against her mattress, Inuyasha crawling on top of her to swallow her smile and give one of his own. He released a chuckle at her cold hands gliding over his neck, but never pulled away. Instead he pressed kiss after kiss against her lips as she returned a small laugh, allowing her fingers to travel wherever they pleased.

Inuyasha had wanted this for so long. He’d wanted Kagome for so long. It should have aways been them. But for him, it would always be her.

#inuyasha #kagome #kagome higurashi #inukag #christmas #inuyasha fanfiction #inukag fanfiction #akitokihojo #fluff #light angst #romance #I mean duh there's romance #yes another Taylor Swift song title #guess the swift song that actually had heavier inspiration tho

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