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glowettee · 3 days ago
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the real secret to self-improvement no one talks about
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hi lovelies, it's mindy
self-improvement isn’t just about perfect morning routines or buying cute stationery. while those things are fun, they’re only surface-level. real self-improvement goes deeper. it’s about creating meaningful, lasting change in your life. if you’re tired of the same recycled advice and want to level up in a way that sticks, this post is for you.
✨ 1. repair before you upgrade
you can’t build a glow-up on a broken foundation. most people dive straight into new habits and routines without addressing the things holding them back. maybe it’s overthinking, procrastination, or negative self-talk. whatever it is, fixing those cracks first will make everything else easier.
actionable tip: spend time journaling or reflecting on the things that sabotage your progress. ask yourself:
what’s draining my energy?
what beliefs are holding me back?
what habits do I need to stop?
self-awareness is the first step to meaningful change.
✨ 2. curate your inner aesthetic
we talk so much about physical aesthetics; outfits, skincare, room decor. but what about your mental aesthetic? your inner world is just as important as what’s on the outside.
ask yourself: is my mind calm and confident, or is it cluttered with negativity and self-doubt? start curating your mental space like you’d curate your pinterest boards.
unfollow people who drain you.
limit scrolling and spend time doing things that actually bring you joy.
romanticize stillness, it doesn't matter if it’s taking a slow walk, reading, or just lying in bed and thinking about life.
actionable tip: create a mental vision board. write down three feelings you want to embody (e.g., peace, gratitude, confidence) and focus on habits that help you get there.
✨ 3. think small to go big
one of the biggest mistakes in self-improvement is focusing on huge, intimidating goals. instead, start with micro-challenges, small, manageable steps that feel fun and doable.
for example:
instead of aiming to wake up at 5 a.m., try waking up 15 minutes earlier for a week.
don’t overhaul your diet overnight; start by drinking one extra glass of water daily.
tiny wins build momentum, and that momentum keeps you going.
actionable tip: pick one micro-challenge to start this week. it could be as simple as organizing your desk or texting a friend you’ve been meaning to reconnect with. small changes lead to big transformations.
✨ 4. audit your environment
your environment shapes your energy. if your space is cluttered, your mind will feel the same. start by decluttering one area of your life.
but don’t stop at physical spaces. think about the people you surround yourself with too. are they uplifting and inspiring, or are they draining your energy? leveling up sometimes means letting go of what doesn’t align with your future self.
actionable tip: dedicate one day this week to an “environment refresh.�� declutter one physical space and evaluate one relationship. ask yourself: does this align with the person i want to become?
✨ 5. embrace your soft power
self-improvement doesn’t have to be intense or overwhelming. there’s strength in soft, intentional growth. it’s not about becoming someone else; it’s about becoming the best version of you.
romanticize your growth. make it feel special:
play calming music while you clean your room.
use a pretty notebook for your to-do lists.
light a candle before you start studying.
the more enjoyable your journey feels, the more likely you are to stick with it.
actionable tip: turn self-improvement into a ritual. add little touches that make the process feel fun and cozy, like wearing your favorite outfit while journaling or drinking tea while planning your week.
✨ key takeaways
real self-improvement isn’t about quick fixes or following trends. it’s about improving yourself in small steps that align with YOUR path.
hopefully this post helped you all
<3 mindy.
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kiefbowl · 2 days ago
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What about amateur porn or drawn erotica?
"amateur porn" is mostly a marketing term. it's meant to convey an idea that the porn is "homemade." but what stops people from just producing and marketing content that looks like that? especially since the idea has been pushed successfully that this is "more ethical porn." That is capitalism 101 - find a market you aren't capturing, make them a product they'll buy.
Even in the event it's not actually a production by a studio, you cannot verify that the porn you're watching is not a woman in an abusive relationship with a pimp. Boyfriends become pimps all the time. I think people have this idea that pimps are caricatures that pop out of the ground organically and fully formed, like some sort of mythological "bad guy." They don't stop to think that any opportunistic man (or woman) can become a pimp easily by just having access to a vulnerable woman. If someone enjoys porn, I think it's easy and worthwhile for them to have a disconnect between what "real abusers" do and what happens in a mythical porn setting that's more convenient to imagine. Yet do you need to look far to find examples of couples either A) joking how much money they could make if the wife would get on OF B) fighting because the husband wants the wife to get on OF to increase their revenue and she doesn't or C) just flat out admitting the wife is on OF and how much money it brings to the table? Besides the fact that in any one of these situations, this could be a covert marketing tactic by OF working with a couple, but even if it's not...why believe in scenario C that the husband is just some good guy and this is just some normal situation they fell into? The difference between scenario C and a pimp is what? They're being public about it by framing it a certain way? Well if that makes the public normalize it, why wouldn't "real" pimps just take that lead and do the same? My point is that there is no distinction: a man (whether it's a stranger, a friend, a dad, a husband, a boyfriend) exerting control over a woman by making her perform sexual acts for his own profit is a pimp, and I don't see why we should trust the way he frames it publicly, even if he says "I'm just a progressive husband who isn't jealous and loves that my wife shakes ass online for our family" or whatever gets people to go "cool! I will not questions this."
I'm sure you're asking in good faith anon, so this isn't directed specifically at you, but often when porn watchers are engaging in debate about porn, they'll start bringing up things like 'drawn erotica' as if it's some sort of gotcha. To me, it's so revealing how little they care about the arguments presented about the harms of the porn industry because yes, obviously drawn erotica is different than filming real humans having sex. It also reveals some sort of assumed bias that the person presenting objections to porn without appealing to religious morality or puritanical ideas about sex are somehow being deceitful. As if once "victimless porn" is brought up, they'll be unable to lie and their true nature will be revealed because they'll have some thinly veiled excuses about how drawn porn is obviously just as bad, because it's so sexy!
Drawings of people having sex or being naked and sexual are not above criticism in how they replicate harmful ideas about sex, sexuality, and gender - but they also aren't literal forms of violence against real people. So, it's irrelevant to the discussion of vulnerable people being pushed into porn to perform sexual acts against their will to a point of ruination. If someone feels comfortable continuing to watch and masturbate to porn after this has been explained to them, I don't see why any thoughts I have on erotica written or drawn or otherwise really matters. They can't be convinced through that avenue, clearly. They're probably willing to take whatever thread they can pull on to justify their consumption and to assuage their conscience over watching porn. That to me signifies a porn addiction, because even a casual viewer of porn who's never come across any anti-porn arguments knows they can live without porn, knows they don't need to defend it tooth and nail, and will not play stupid about comparisons to real people having sex on film/enacting violence on each other to erotic drawings.
At the end of the day, re: erotica, I would need to take each thing of media in it's own right and judge it for itself (like all film, books, and art). If it replicates pornographic images (i.e. the film language of porn that I take issue with vis-a-vis misogyny and violence against women), then yeah I'm going to have a problem with it. Not because it's sexual, but because it's content is disagreeable to me in that it's misogynistic. The scale for that is going to be sliding - the difference between a causal representation of unexamined gender dynamics and extremely violent CSAM is huge. I don't take issues with people finding, say, mild 18th century drawings titillating as much as I take issues with people acting entitled to violent images as if their masturbation depends on it and they're entitled to masturbate to whatever they want. Why? I masturbate to my imagination all the time. It's literally the easiest and most natural thing to do. If someone can't, it's probably because they're addicted to porn. If desperate poor women being pushed into drugs to continue making porn that becomes increasingly violent doesn't stop someone from watching porn, then maybe I should ask them to get angry at porn for altering their brain so badly. That's how desperate people sound when they have to scrape the bottom of the barrel in the face of facts about violence, poverty, suicide, and abuse.
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esotericalchemist · 1 day ago
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𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐱 𝐨𝐟 𝐃𝐞𝐬���𝐢𝐧𝐲 - 𝐂𝐚𝐬𝐡 𝐅𝐥𝐨𝐰 𝐀𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 ⋆.ೃ࿔*
TikTok (Matrix of Destiny) - Masterlist - YouTube (subliminals)
The Cash Flow Point in the Matrix of Destiny highlights the energy and strategies that influence financial prosperity. It reveals how an individual can activate abundance by aligning with their unique strengths and overcoming potential blocks. Each Arcana at this point offers specific guidance, from cultivating creativity to embracing change or finding balance. Understanding these energies provides valuable insight into creating opportunities, managing resources effectively, and unlocking the flow of prosperity. By tapping into this knowledge, one can align with their financial potential and achieve greater harmony in their material life.
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Calculate your Matrix of Destiny here:
Matrix of Destiny calculator
( if that one does not work, use the following link: alternative calculator)
! --- LOOK AT THE NUMBER LOCATED IN THE BLACK SQUARE IN THE IMAGE BELOW --!
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So in this case it is 15!
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𝟑 - 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐄𝐦𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬
Money flows easily to you when you tap into the energy of the 3rd Arcana—creativity, beauty, and harmony. Whether it’s designing, organizing, or bringing people together, your ability to make things flourish is your financial gift. Creating something meaningful, no matter how small, opens doors to abundance.
A big part of your success comes from nurturing what matters most. So, stay hands-on and let your ideas grow into something wonderful. But here’s the catch—if you let doubt creep in or ignore your talents, that flow might slow down. Taking too much on at once can also drain your energy, leaving you stuck.
Stick to what inspires you, give your projects love and attention, and trust that your creative energy will keep your financial garden thriving!
𝟒 - 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐄𝐦𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐫
Building stability is your key to unlocking cash flow under the influence of the 4th Arcana. You’re at your best when you create order, set a strong foundation, and stick to clear, steady plans. Whether it’s organizing your finances, creating a budget, or setting long-term goals, your ability to stay grounded is what attracts prosperity.
But watch out—being too rigid or resistant to change can block your progress. If you cling to routines that no longer serve you or shy away from taking calculated risks, your financial flow might stall.
The secret? Balance structure with flexibility. Stay disciplined, but keep an open mind. A solid foundation doesn’t mean you can’t adapt, and that combination will keep your cash flow steady and growing.
𝟓 - 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐇𝐢𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐩𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐭
Your cash flow under the 5th Arcana thrives when you embrace learning and sharing knowledge. You’re naturally skilled at guiding others, and this ability to teach, mentor, or communicate your expertise can open financial doors. The more you expand your mind and help others grow, the more abundance flows back to you.
That said, one thing that might slow you down is overthinking or hoarding knowledge instead of putting it into practice. Success isn’t just about learning; it’s about applying what you know.
So, don’t hold back. Share your insights, stay curious, and keep building connections through your wisdom. The more you lean into your role as a guide or expert, the more financial opportunities will come your way.
𝟔 - 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬
With the 6th Arcana influencing your cash flow, love and harmony are at the center of your financial success. When you invest time and energy into meaningful relationships or projects you truly care about, the rewards—both emotional and financial—naturally follow. You’re at your best when your heart is in your work and your decisions feel aligned with your values.
What might get in the way? Overgiving or prioritizing others’ needs over your own can drain your energy and resources. Staying in unbalanced partnerships or ignoring your emotional instincts could also block your flow.
The key is balance. Honor your heart, nurture your connections, and ensure you’re giving to yourself as much as you give to others. When your life feels harmonious, abundance follows naturally.
𝟕 - 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐭
Under the influence of the 7th Arcana, your cash flow thrives on movement and determination. When you set a clear direction and pursue it with focus, success has a way of finding you. You’re someone who gains momentum by taking action—your drive and persistence are your greatest financial assets.
What could block you? Spreading yourself too thin or rushing without a plan. Impulsiveness or trying to control every detail can also slow your progress.
To keep the flow strong, stay disciplined and channel your energy wisely. Keep your goals in sight and trust that steady, intentional movement will lead to financial breakthroughs.
𝟖 - 𝐉𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞
Money finds you when you embrace balance and fairness—that’s the vibe of the 8th Arcana. It’s not about being overly cautious or taking wild risks. Instead, focus on making decisions that feel fair and aligned, both for you and others involved. When you stay centered and thoughtful, your financial flow becomes steady and reliable.
However, there’s a catch: overthinking can slow you down. If you get stuck trying to make everything “perfect,” you might miss chances to act. Another pitfall? Letting unfair situations slide, which could drain your energy and resources.
So, aim for balance. Trust yourself to make the right calls, keep things fair, and let that inner sense of justice pave the way to financial growth.
𝟗 - 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐇𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐭
When the 9th Arcana influences your financial flow, patience is your greatest ally. This isn’t about racing ahead; it’s about taking the time to dig deep, learn, and grow. You might find that your wealth comes from skills or knowledge gained through quiet persistence rather than flashy moves.
On the flip side, withdrawing too much or getting stuck in analysis can block progress. If you avoid sharing your work or hesitate to take action, opportunities might slip by.
Here’s your takeaway: Trust the process. Stay focused on what you’re building, but don’t forget to step out of the shadows and let others see the brilliance you’ve been quietly creating. That’s when your flow really begins.
𝟏𝟎 - 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐅𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐮𝐧𝐞
The energy of the 10th Arcana spins the wheel of your financial life, bringing opportunities through cycles and change. Your key to success lies in adaptability—when the tides turn, ride the wave instead of resisting it. Luck often finds you when you stay ready and open to what’s coming next.
But beware of complacency. Sitting back and waiting for the wheel to turn in your favor could keep you stuck. Equally, fear of taking risks can stop you from grabbing the opportunities that come your way.
Think of your finances as a partnership with destiny. Take inspired action when opportunities appear, trust the natural flow of change, and let the wheel guide you to new heights.
𝟏𝟏 - 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐭𝐡
Strength is your foundation for financial flow when the 11th Arcana is in play. Your success grows as you face challenges head-on, calmly navigating obstacles with resilience and focus. You’re the type who can turn a tough situation into a stepping stone simply by believing in your ability to handle it.
However, pushing too hard or doubting yourself could slow things down. If you let fear or external pressures overwhelm you, your flow might falter. Balance is key here—don’t try to control everything; let things unfold naturally.
Remember, your inner strength is your superpower. Stay grounded, trust in your abilities, and use your steady determination to keep your finances moving in the right direction.
𝟏𝟐 - 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐇𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐌𝐚𝐧
With the 12th Arcana influencing your financial flow, letting go becomes your greatest ally. Sometimes, stepping back and surrendering control is the most powerful move you can make. True abundance comes when you trust the process, even if progress feels slow or unclear.
What could stall things? Holding too tightly to old patterns or fearing the unknown. If you resist change or try to force results, you might miss the natural flow of opportunities.
Your secret weapon is patience. Look at your situation from a fresh perspective, stay open to shifts, and let life guide you to the right financial opportunities. Sometimes, stepping away is exactly what allows success to find you.
𝟏𝟑 - 𝐃𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡
The 13th Arcana teaches that financial growth comes through transformation. Clearing out the old—whether it’s outdated habits, lingering doubts, or an unproductive job—creates space for something better to emerge. Letting go is never easy, but it’s how you pave the way for abundance.
What gets in the way? Fear of change is a big one. Holding onto what’s familiar, even when it no longer serves you, can block your flow. It’s also easy to mistake endings as failures, rather than seeing them as necessary for new beginnings.
Your power lies in embracing change. Trust that every ending is part of a cycle leading to renewal. When you welcome transformation, you’ll find the opportunities waiting on the other side.
𝟏𝟒 - 𝐓𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞
The energy of the 14th Arcana brings financial success through balance and steady effort. Your best strategy is to take things one step at a time, blending ambition with patience. Think of your finances as a recipe—each ingredient added thoughtfully leads to a perfect outcome.
The pitfalls? Acting too impulsively or becoming overly cautious can disrupt the flow. Extremes, whether spending too much or saving too rigidly, might throw you off course.
To keep the flow alive, aim for moderation in all things. Be mindful, adaptable, and trust that small, consistent actions will create long-term abundance. Balance is the key to keeping your prosperity steady and fulfilling.
𝟏𝟓 - 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐥
The 15th Arcana connects your financial flow to ambition and desire. You’re a natural at manifesting what you want, especially when you set clear goals and focus your energy. Success for you often comes from tapping into your drive and fearlessly going after what lights you up.
On the flip side, getting too caught up in materialism or unhealthy obsessions can block your flow. Letting fear, guilt, or excessive control guide your decisions could also create setbacks.
The secret to keeping your cash flow thriving? Stay aligned with your values and channel your ambition into meaningful pursuits. When your desires are in harmony with a higher purpose, abundance follows naturally.
𝟏𝟔 - 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐓𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫
The 16th Arcana brings financial transformation through sudden shifts and breakthroughs. It’s the energy of tearing down old systems to build something more aligned and lasting. Change might feel unsettling, but these disruptions often make room for opportunities you couldn’t have planned for.
What can block this flow? Holding on too tightly to the past or resisting change out of fear. Trying to rebuild with the same old patterns can keep you stuck in a loop, preventing new possibilities from taking root.
To thrive, embrace the changes and trust the process. Even when the path feels shaky, know that it’s clearing the way for a stronger, more prosperous future.
𝟏𝟕 - 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐫
The 17th Arcana shines a light on hope and inspiration as the key to your financial flow. When you stay connected to your dreams and believe in what’s possible, opportunities align effortlessly. Your optimism and creativity are powerful tools for attracting abundance, so let your vision guide your actions.
What might hold you back? Losing faith in yourself or your path can dim that light. If you scatter your energy across too many ideas without focus, your progress might slow.
Keep your eyes on the horizon, take consistent steps toward your goals, and let your belief in the future fuel your journey. Your faith in what’s possible is your strongest asset for creating lasting financial success.
𝟏𝟖 - 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐌𝐨𝐨𝐧
The 18th Arcana ties your financial flow to intuition and trusting the unknown. Success often comes to you in ways that defy logic—through gut feelings, synchronicities, or following a path that feels right even when it’s unclear. Leaning into this energy helps you uncover hidden opportunities and keeps abundance moving.
What could block you? Overthinking and ignoring your instincts. If you try to force logic into every decision or dismiss the subtle signals around you, you might miss out. Fear of uncertainty is another potential roadblock.
The lesson here is to trust yourself and the process, even when things feel murky. Your intuition knows the way—listen to it, and let it guide your financial journey.
𝟏𝟗 - 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐮𝐧
The 19th Arcana connects your financial success to radiance and positivity. Your warmth, charisma, and ability to inspire others naturally attract opportunities. When you step confidently into the spotlight and share your talents, abundance follows.
On the flip side, holding back or doubting your worth can block your flow. If you shy away from showing your full potential or let negativity creep in, you might miss out on opportunities meant for you.
Your path to prosperity? Shine brightly and trust in your abilities. Let your confidence and optimism lead the way, and you’ll find that your success inspires not only yourself but also those around you.
𝟐𝟎 - 𝐉𝐮𝐝𝐠𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭
The 20th Arcana connects your cash flow to awakening and stepping into your purpose. Financial success comes when you embrace change, leave the past behind, and align with what truly matters to you. It’s about seeing your potential and moving forward with renewed clarity and confidence.
What can hold you back? Clinging to old ways or doubting your ability to start fresh. Fear of stepping into the unknown can also delay your progress.
Your secret is to trust the process of transformation. Let go of what no longer serves you and embrace the opportunities waiting on the other side. This is your chance to rise into a new chapter of financial abundance.
𝟐𝟏 - 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝
The 21st Arcana links your cash flow to completion and expansion. Financial success for you often comes when you take your work or ideas to a larger stage, connecting with the world in meaningful ways. You’re at your best when you bring projects to completion and celebrate your progress, all while staying open to new opportunities.
What might get in the way? Holding back from stepping into your full potential or feeling unworthy of success. Another challenge could be fearing the end of a cycle, which may stop you from starting something even bigger.
Your key to abundance is trusting in your ability to grow and expand. Embrace the bigger picture, celebrate your achievements, and know that every ending is a stepping stone to something greater. Prosperity comes when you confidently take your place in the world.
𝟐𝟐 - 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐨𝐨𝐥
The 22nd Arcana opens your cash flow through freedom, creativity, and a willingness to embrace the unexpected. Your financial success comes when you take risks, think outside the box, and let life’s possibilities inspire you. You thrive when you trust your instincts and explore uncharted territory, knowing that abundance is found in the journey.
What could block you? Fear of stepping out of your comfort zone or letting doubt keep you from pursuing bold ideas. A lack of focus or direction can also slow your progress—freedom is powerful, but it needs purpose.
Your path to financial flow? Stay open, flexible, and curious. Trust your ability to adapt, take inspired leaps, and find joy in the process. When you let your sense of adventure guide you, success follows naturally.
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TikTok (Matrix of Destiny) - Masterlist - YouTube (subliminals)
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centrally-unplanned · 19 hours ago
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In news from a different world, last December J-pop idol Miho Nakayama passed away, quite shockingly so at the age of 54. I have no connection to her music or acting, but of course I do appreciate her role in the very early history of video game development and dating sims via the 1987 Famicom game Nakayama Miho no Tokimeki High School, which I have discussed before. I decided to play the game "in memoriam", as it were - it does in fact have an English patch, and you can see a playthrough of said patch on YouTube here. It was time to experience my very own 80's high school idol love story <3.
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To the surprise of no one, this game sucks. It essentially had to, no real fault on the developers, but that doesn't change the facts. It is working with incredibly limited graphical capabilities of course, with the average scene looking like this:
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Which just isn’t enough for “ambiance” immersion to work, every setting is generic by definition. That can of course be saved by a good plot or gameplay, but neither shows up here; there is barely any story to speak of. Main Guy goes to new school, meets “Mizuho”, realizes she is secretly pop idol Miho trying to live a normal life, they start dating, and paparazzi-types and the pressures of her career get in the way such that eventually (based on your route progression) she breaks up with you or you stay a couple and ride off into the sunset together. Literally by the way, a friend loans you a motorcycle so you can escape the press:
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You might be saying “surely you are skipping some things” but I assure you it is nothing important. Neither Miho nor the main character have any personality to speak of, and your time is filled generally by comedic hijinks or just the mechanics of progressing the relationship. There is a fat-faced friend who gossips about school, you have a family that ~exists, there is a stuck-up rich girl you speak to about twice before she kidnaps you in order to serve you drugged food so you will date her (as was typical for 1980’s courtship norms) which happens solely to make you late for a date with Miho to create drama, and so on - it is all as tiresome as it is irrelevant. You can even poke your head into the girl’s locker room at some point, the crown jewel of filler content:
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This isn’t even arcade-cabinet-strip-mahjong levels of hot, I know video games of the era could do better than this! Though for all the extraneous plot beats and side characters, I did like “The Trio”, a group of cackling girls who follow you around like a Greek chorus taunting you for your desires:
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In another game these fey spirits would devour your organs at the right moment, mad respect. 
Anyway, all of this plot filler is used to stretch out the non-story but in that task it gets a helping hand from the game mechanics, which are a classic example of arbitrary progression gatekeeping. Half the dialogue options are just variants of the same core emotion, and the right answer is inscrutable. You get moments like this one, where Miho is apologizing to you for a misunderstanding:
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And all of these answers are pretty dismissive? But the right answer is A, the meanest of them! Guess she has a type, but since you as a player haven’t negotiated her safe words yet you don’t know that and are just gonna facecheck your way through these.
As the cherry on top the advertised “facial expression” system is actually a letdown - it is very rarely used, most dialogue options don’t ask for it, and when they do you have six options:
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But you actually never use half of these, and 90% of the time the correct answer is “normal”. At least this was bad in a “too easy” way, so it doesn’t waste your time, but you could just remove it as a mechanic and miss nothing. All of the “interactive” elements could be replaced by linear narrative, actually, and nothing would be lost.
Besides the competitive media mix aspects of the game, obviously. Which is what it is all about, right? This ain’t some random 8-bit idol, this is Miho Nakayama! And even in-game she is pretty cute, I do like the design for the close-up convos:
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The glasses-for-disguise are nice with her moe eyes, the details of the shading really pop in an 8-bit context, and really the whole framework of the UI as this sort of flip picture book is adding value here (as opposed to being irrelevant in the location shots). They even give her a bunch of different outfits on your dates because as the heroine she deserves it:
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“Ash, those first two are literally just palette swaps” “No man, look, the red one is using dithering to create a fade effect on the colors, implying a more complicated pattern like plaid thatching, while the blue one uses bold lines to imply a striped coat”. It was impressive in 1987, alright! This girl has no textual personality but there is life in this design that stands out from its peers.
But of course it isn’t the in-game graphics doing the heavy lifting here. As mentioned before, this was a “Telephone Game”, where players would be prompted at times to call phone numbers Nintendo had rented out to hear voicemails Nakayama had recorded. These voicemails are, to the best I can tell, lost to us - I have not found an existing recording online. They were only up briefly actually, for a few months after the game was released - this was not an era where longevity for games was considered important. We do have transcripts of them though, and I can imagine that picking up your house phone, calling a phone number, and getting the actual voice of the “character” in the game talking to you - making your heart go doki doki if you will - must have been pretty cool.
(Miho even travels throughout the game, and the phone numbers - according to this blogger - actually use location-appropriate area codes so it feels like you are really calling Osaka or Hokkaido! Very cool…unless - according to another blogger - you got hit with long distance calling charges for your pursuit of troubled love, as was reported in the media at the time. Now that’s authenticity?)
This mechanic is essentially a ludomantic experience that is impossible to capture today, because voice acting in video games is incredibly common; so much so that it would come off as gimmicky to make someone go through such a multi-device process. But since the Famicom couldn’t make vocal sounds, it had to make you use your phone, which created the simulacrum of actually calling a real human outside of the game to talk to. That is pretty neat!
As mentioned, the media mix came bundled with a competition - the winners were the first 16,000 players to submit a “Best Ending” record via the barely-used Famicom Disk Fax system. As helpfully explained in the instruction manual alongside photos of the IRL Nakayama:
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And the big prize of a VHS tape of behind-the-scenes Nakayama stuff has been preserved, and is easily available if you want to watch it. Don’t though, it isn’t worth it; it is primarily b-roll footage of her doing typical day-to-day tasks and softball interview questions about “what is her type” with generic answers, stuff like that. Solid C- for the genre. But still, you didn’t know that when competing, right? The pressure to get your game file in was fierce.
I mentioned how the game essentially “had to be bad” at the start, and I want to dig into why that is. In my initial post I linked, I actually made a false statement - I said the development time for the game was “2 weeks”. I said that because the game’s Wikipedia page in English says it and so it is common trivia on the net, but I don’t think that it is true. Even when I typed it in that original post, the back of my mind was going “wait, that can’t be literally true, it is very hard to make a game that fast in that era - these guys are coding in Assembly!”, but I sort of hand-waived it away as, oh something like they were harvesting an existing game prototype or somesuch. But I believe this fact comes from a mistranslation of interviews like this one:
岩田: 坂口さんは『ファイナルファンタジー』の開発を終えて、『トキメキハイスクール』に合流されたんですか? 坂口: ええ。チームの何名かが合流して、3カ月間くらいでしょうか。で、最後は10名くらいのメンバーといっしょに京都にやって来て、2週間くらいカンヅメになって、なんとか開発を終えることができたんです。
Or:
Iwata: Sakaguchi, did you join the "Tokimeki High School" project after finishing development on "Final Fantasy"? Sakaguchi: Yes, that’s right. Several team members joined the project for about 3 months, I think. And then near the end of development, about 10 of us came down to Kyoto and we holed up for around 2 weeks until we somehow managed to finish the game.
So what is going on here is the game’s development was a joint production between Nintendo - in Kyoto at this time - and up-and-coming game company Square in Tokyo. And yes, they were literally working on Final Fantasy right before this game, and switched gears to tackle this new project. Or at least some of them did, for 3 months, and then famed-director-of-Final-Fantasy Sakaguchi came down to Kyoto and lived out of a hotel for two weeks doing crunch to finish it off. That fact, probably because Sakaguchi is the famous person reporters would care about, got transformed into the idea that the whole game took 2 weeks to make. 
In this same interview they talk about how, at the end of that crunch, they all went out for drinks to celebrate…until they got a phone call about how the motorcycle in the ending credits is glitching out and flying off the screen, which they thought was a hilarious, beautifully fitting bug for their time together. And that is hilarious, the primary reason I am recounting it, but I also think it goes to show that this was a hot mess of a game dev process. 2 weeks or ~3 months, both of those are not enough time. And with two companies in different cities, doing crunch out of a hotel, wrangling with a record label for a pop idol’s permission, setting up phone line recordings and VHS tapes and a bonus competition using experimental fax machines, all aligned with a media blitz? All for a game genre that honestly hadn’t been done before? I have checked, and you can authentically argue this is the first ever dating sim, at least on a console. People overstate what it is inventing - it is pulling tropes from romance anime and manga, of course - but even that process of transference is tough. This wasn’t a genre yet, and in a way they weren’t even trying to make a dating sim. They were trying to make an event.
One that today you just can’t experience. Very few people care about Nakayama Miho “like that” anymore, we aren’t seeing the commercials or the magazine ads or buying the discount unofficial strategy guide that invented a fake protagonist and never used Miho’s name because they didn’t have the rights. Today you play the game just because it is a game, and when you hit the phone numbers you tab over to a transcript of the voicemails…or maybe don’t even bother. The game was just a vessel for the hype. That doesn’t make the game good, by the way, I don’t want to go that far. The game was a not-very-good vessel for the hype, and an anachronistically better team could have made a better game. It isn’t really worth playing, in the end. But it is worth researching! As an event, it is really cool. As a piece of history, it is probably unique. And I respect the team behind it for that.
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anaalnathrakhs · 8 months ago
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i've had to unfollow a couple of aro-positivity blogs bc they hammer how at the same time they complain about friendships being deemed lesser than romance, and also about romantic shipping somehow ruining every canon or fanon friendship/platonic/etc thing those characters had.
"Why do you ship those characters???? Do you hate platonic friendships????" Well you see, they're friends in canon, and various relationship settings are interesting to explore between characters who have a strong bond. The same way people write pre-dating pining/falling in love/backstory/just being friends stories for canon couples. Just like sometimes people decide those two were matched in a way that doesn't jive with them and break them up in their fanfic.
"Shipping a character who doesn't have a love interest in canon is arophobia!!!" Yeah and you can only have one OTP else the characters are cheating on each other. Each pairing can only be written with a dynamic as close to canon as possible, else you just don't understand the source material. Writing an interpretation of the source means that you think that's exactly what the original writer implied, and the only correct interpretation.
"Shipping an aro character is just like making a gay character straight!!!" Neither of which are actually inherently bad and poorly handled things. Excluding making a case for characters being romance-positive/demi/gray/in qprs/etc while incorporating canon/subtext/word-of-god aro elements, because ppl writing those posts are often (rightfully) cool with it, it's also just. yknow. fine. Case-by-case, if you will. Sometimes a character dynamic would be interesting because characters are more than their orientation and also NOT REAL PEOPLE with no internal lives, likes and dislikes, boundaries, etc. You can modify things about them. It can be done in a poor manner, and denote a misunderstanding of aro issues and identities, or straight up bigotry. It can also just be that it's interesting to write about. Like genderbends for example. Many of the same arguments can be used there.
Anyway. Of course amatonormativity is real, and very present, and overwhelming, and exhausting. But the thing is that no fanfic interpretation REPLACES the original text or another interpretation. Friendships and other platonic relationships are not valued enough, given enough spotlight in media. But the answer to that isn't to chastize people for being creative and violating the integrity of a fictional character's identity. Encourage depictions and explorations of less normative relationships (not in the romantic sense of the word, all kinds of relationships), as well as the weight they hold. Educate people on aromanticism, amatonormativity, etc. I know you're already doing it, and it's not working, but trying to shame people for being creative is not gonna make it work faster.
Also re: in most cases, characters should not use therapy-speak to communicate or think, because that's not how people function in real life. Same thing applies. Just like internalize homophobia is a staple of many gay fanfics that wish to deal (however superficially and however in-depth as they'd like) with the topic, amatonormativity is going to be a feature of many fanfics about characters living in a world that, modeled after ours or not, was still created by people living in the same amatonormativity as we are. Usually, unless they actively work to insert non-amatonormative elements in their worldbuilding or specific story setting, writers will create a world through the prism of our society's amatonormativity, thus creating an amatonormative setting producing characters that think amatonormatively. It doesn't stop them experiencing things outside of the realm of that "normality", but it does influence the way they'll think and act about it.
There's few situations in which a long internal monologue about which modern queer lingo is appropriate for their feelings doesn't feel a bit shoehorned (and no hate if you want to write or read a feelgood piece instead of detailing internalized bigotry in all its complexity, to be clear, but that's a writing choice not a moral requirement to signify that This Author is Aro-Positive). Thus, characters will think about, act, narrate their story, etc, as they experience it, with the knowledge and vocabulary they have. Every action is only as romantic/platonic as the people doing it intend to make it, and every action you see on screen is up to your interpretation because characters don't have intentions.
I can write about two characters having sex, and not include a huge paragraph about how totally romanticism-less this whole thing is, because it would be completely out of character for them to apprehend these concepts in these words, and I don't want to tackle the WHOLE damn split-attraction model or every possible non-amatonormative way to conceptualize fuckbuddies arrangements, because I'm writing prose and not an educative guide. They fall for amatonormative ideas that are restrictive and don't encompass the full spectrum of human relationships. Hell, maybe the writer does too, even if they do challenge some other amatonormative ideas. But in any case, it does not erase any narrative of platonic feelings for those characters. The flavor-text reiterating amatonormative ideas ("this COULDN'T have been friendship" "relationships fixed them and they were so so sad and miserable before", etc) is annoying, but 1st of all educating is always better than chastizing, and 2nd of all sometimes prose is just hyperbolic like that, idk, there's notes of biphobia in how some stories highlight the character's first gay experience, but it's also just resonating and amplifying the feelings some people really do feel in these situations. That's a writing thing. Not universal to every style, but common.
yeah. non-amatonormative rep is good. less creative endeavors is bad.
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heyitsphoenixx · 10 months ago
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#personal vent incoming to just get off my chest don't be weird about it#i've known since i was a kid that my dad was overtly abusive but#just in the last 3-5 months i've learned my mom was and currently is almost just as abusive#but she's just covert about it instead#all of my adolescence was about surviving my dad who was so obviously a monster that he was almost easier to deal w in a way by comparison#this is. what an utter mind fuck#there's also like. no member of my family that i can turn to for help#bc they're either just as bad or my mother has ruined any relationship i might have w them over time#and i also fear being a burden#so i'm making a plan to get out but god it's overwhelming thinking about doing it all alone#and the thought that it might take years to actually get out or get healthy#she's kept me isolated from any support for so long#and im afraid any family that could possibly help wouldn't fully understand or they would be just as bad as her#and it feels impossible to progress at all bc im living w her and literally filed as her dependent on taxes#like ik this is gonna be the hardest thing to escape in my life and i've already escaped a lot#but this time i have to largely on my own#is v scary#and she's conditioned me to believe that i can't make any right decisions on my own without her#and that anything i do is always 'backwards'#makes it that much harder to make a clear plan#her work schedule is so inconsistent that it makes getting therapy online (since i don't have a license or car yet) nearly impossible#to do it without her or my brother listening#that i've just felt trapped for years#but. i can Tell i'm getting better now and rapidly. more than i've been for a v long time#so the process is just beginning and i think even she can tell#which is also dangerous#but ik i can do this its just the amount of time and effort and organizing behind her back and doing it alone thats v overwhelming#but anyway#we stay silly
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sentientobjects · 1 year ago
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i have object bio hcs u couldnt even Fathom
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puthyflapps · 2 years ago
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I'm kind of obsessed that no one really cares that gen q got canceled. Do you know how bad a show has to be for the twitter lesbians NOT to start a # to try and save it? Granted it's probably because the reboot is already in the works but it's still so funny to me.
There was a hashtag going around before any renewal/cancellation news dropped and the funny part is the # wasn’t aiming to save Gen Q but to basically do what they’re doing now which is completely scrap the show and start over so lmaooo what a win for the girlies
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s0fter-sin · 1 month ago
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alpha!ghost who's always hated the sound of an omega's purr; he’s always found it patronising, manipulative, an attempt to twist his biology - twist him - into submission like he's some animal
until he hears soap purr for the first time and it's about as choppy and comforting as a machine gun. there's nothing smooth about it, nothing seductive or wily; it's broken and guttural and the most honest noise ghost's ever heard outside his own growls
he doesn't use it to coo him into complacency, doesn't try to bend him to his will or smooth over his bristles. he's never tried to distract ghost from his anger, never used his intrinsic control over him to gentle him. hell, he seems to forget he can even do it, ghost hears it so rarely. it's only a touch above his growls, subharmonic and demanding attention instead of the pretty titter of a pampered omega
ghost hears it for the first time when he’s covered in blood not his, after he slits an enemy pinning him down from navel to chin; dark blood instantly soaking him. the body’s practically cool with blood loss already when he tosses it aside and rolls to his feet to find soap stock still, staring at him with a feral gleam in his eyes
he drops his jaw with a deep inhale, rolling the scent of blood and pissed alpha pheromones in his mouth and his chest rumbles with all the subtlety of a chainsaw
it's suddenly all ghost can do to keep himself from dragging the body and dropping it at soap's feet like a courting gift of old; to carve out his heart and rich organs and present them for his approval, to hold them to his mouth and never break eye contact as he takes his first bloody bite
ghost shakes it off, strangling the chuff trying to claw out his throat, and heads for the rv point and feels absolutely nothing when soap falls into step behind him without a word; his purr that more closely mimics an alpha's rumble an echoing memory
soap's far from a meek, compliant omega and he's no conniving prince wrapping alphas around his finger either; he's just as much a protector, an aggressor, as any alpha. he's never been ashamed of his instincts; never shied away from nuzzling into price's throat, purring for his pack alpha with no regard to the uncomfortable crowd surrounding them. never hesitates to wrap gaz up and drop him in his nest when the beta reeks of stress and sickly insomnia
and he never stops himself from baring his fangs with a guttural hiss whenever another omega dares to purr at ghost
it's a threat and a warning in one; something only the most foolish omega would ignore. he knows ghost has a complex relationship with omegas, knows it isn't something so pathetic as biological prejudice. something about omegas makes his lt's scent go flat and steely, as close to distress as he thinks he can manage and it makes something dark and old rise in his chest
territorial rage broils off him, strong enough to make the omega whine and back off with their tail between their legs without even taking a step towards them. the scent is sour and pungent enough to drown out ghost's subtle distressed smell, to hide it, and it makes him snort; shaking his head to try and clear it
soap all but trots up beside him, chirping in greeting. he sneezes playfully, lets him know the rage scent wasn't for him; never for him. he replaces it with happy-friend-pack, replaces it with nitroglycerin and burning sparklers and butts his forehead against his sternum instead of crowding into his throat and purring the way he wants to
he earned his way into ghost's pack, into becoming an omega not just accepted but welcomed and he won't jeopardise his hard won progress by pushing his purr on him
he lifts his head and grins as ghost cups his nape in a faux-scruff, something offensive and borderline taboo and if he were anyone else, he'd rip his hand off with his teeth. but it's ghost and ghost does strange things, things that reassure him on a deeper level than any purr or chirp could ever hope to, so soap presses into his gentling hand and bares his teeth in the thinnest facsimile of a smile at the retreating omega
all ghost has to do is aim him in the right direction and he'd bring the omega back to him in pieces; would gift him their torn out throat so they could never purr at him again
his chest rumbles subconsciously and soap gnashes his teeth, forcing his purr back down when ghost squeezes his nape
he thumps his temple into his and a puff of air tickles his ear, the closest thing soap's ever heard to a chuff from him and he couldn't stop his purr if he tried; choppy and broken as it is
you inhale enough explosive fumes and it's bound to damage something
ghost huffs again and soap presses up to nibble appeasingly at his clothed jaw, a question and an apology in each bite
ghost just takes the tip of his ear between his teeth, shaking it with a teasing growl and soap laughs as he tackles him just for ghost to bow over his back and wrap his arms around his waist; effortlessly picking him up and tossing him away
soap stays low and growls right back, a wild smile splitting his face. ghost meets him with a sneeze and his grin grows impossibly wider
if he can't hunt for his alpha, can't purr for him with blood on his teeth, he'll happily wrestle with him instead
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taamlok · 1 month ago
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Rook Tarot Card Ask Game
Some in-depth character development questions for your Rook, inspired by the major arcana tarot cards
The Fool: Where did Rook's journey begin? What were they doing before joining the Veilguard?
The Magician: What are Rook's thoughts on Solas? Do they change as the story progresses?
The High Priestess: Which does Rook obey more: their head or their heart?
The Empress: What does family mean for Rook?
The Emperor: What does Rook's leadership style look like?
The Hierophant: Is Rook religious? How do they feel about the religious organizations that impact their life the most?
The Lovers: Who is your Rook's most significant relationship within the Veilguard? How do they help Rook feel seen and understood?
The Chariot: How does Rook fight? What are their preferred abilities and damage type?
Strength: What gives your Rook courage? What inspires them to keep fighting?
The Hermit: When Rook is alone with their thoughts, what do they think about? Is solitude a blessing or a curse for them?
The Wheel of Fortune: Describe an interesting character moment for your Rook. What made this moment stand out to you?
Justice: How does Rook feel about the circumstances that led to them leaving their faction? What does returning feel like?
The Hanged Man: What does Rook do when their hard work doesn't pay off? How do they cope with failure?
Death: What part of Rook do they need to kill to become the best version of themselves?
Temperance: What does Rook do to deal with the stress of their situation?
The Devil: What type of demon is most likely to target Rook? Why?
The Tower: How does Rook respond to unexpected catastrophe?
The Star: When things get dark, what gives Rook hope?
The Moon: How does Rook's past impact their values? Does their past come with any biases or blind spots they have to account for?
The Sun: What is Rook passionate about? How do they fuel that passion?
Judgement: How does Rook approach difficult decisions? How do they cope with the consequences of those choices?
The World: What does happily-ever-after look like for Rook? Is it attainable, or just wishful thinking?
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missdollcouture · 1 year ago
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NEW YEAR, NEW ME
this is a collab w the it girl @prettieinpink !!
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HABITS TO IMPLEMENT 
Movement (yoga, running, Pilates, walking, gym, etc. Anything that allows you to move your body 
Reflection- make a note of things you would like to improve on. This could be self-love, relationships, 
STAY CONSISTENT
Consistency is key. Make sure to stick to your plan and keep working towards your goals every day. Even small steps are progress. Try to make your goal part of your daily routine. 
HOW TO STAY CONSISTENT 
SCHEDULE- Setting schedules helps really well with consistency. Make a schedule for the tasks you need to do daily or weekly to achieve your goals. This can help you make your goals a part of your routine, making it easier to stay consistent.
STAY ORGANIZED- Keep track of your tasks and goals. Use tools like calendars, to-do lists, or apps to help you stay organized and remember what you need to do.
DISCIPLINE YOURSELF- Sometimes, you won't feel like working towards your goals, and that's okay. The key is to maintain discipline and do the task anyway. Remember, consistency is about doing the task regularly, not just when you feel like it.
START SMALL- Don't overwhelm yourself with huge tasks. Start small and gradually increase your workload as you build consistency.
DON’T BE TOO HARD ON YOURSELF- If you miss a day, don't beat yourself up. Instead, acknowledge that it happened, understand why, and move on. Consistency is about long-term progress, not perfection.
CREATE A PLAN
Once you know what your goals are, create a step-by-step plan on how to achieve them. Break down each goal into smaller, manageable tasks. This might involve creating a timeline, setting deadlines, or identifying resources or tools you might need.
LEAVE THINGS IN THE PAST 
In 2023, I’m sure everyone has had ups and downs, but not letting them define you as a person is something that has to be done in order for you to become a new person.
HOW TO LEAVE THINGS IN THE PAST
ACCEPTANCE-  Acknowledge the past and accept it as part of your life story. Understand that it's something that has shaped you but doesn't define you.
FORGIVENESS- Forgive yourself and others. Holding onto resentment only harms you. Letting go of grudges can bring a sense of peace and open up space for healthier relationships.
LEARN FROM IT- Every experience, good or bad, is an opportunity to learn. Reflect on these experiences and use them as stepping stones to better decisions in the future.
FOCUS ON THE PRESENT- The past is unchangeable, but the present is in your control. Concentrate on what you can do now to create a positive future.
SET NEW GOALS- Create new objectives for yourself. This gives you something to work towards and helps shift your focus from the past to the future.
PRACTISE MINDFULNESS- Mindfulness is about staying focused on the present moment. Practices like meditation can help you stay grounded and prevent you from dwelling on the past.
ADJUST YOUR PLAN AS NEEDED
It's okay if your initial plan doesn't work out exactly as you thought. Life happens, and it's important to be flexible and adapt your plan as needed. If you find that a certain approach isn't working, don't be afraid to try something different.
PRACTICE SELF CARE
Remember to take care of yourself physically, emotionally, and mentally. This can include things like getting enough sleep, eating healthy, exercising regularly, and taking time to relax and do things you enjoy. Don't forget that self-care is an important part of reaching your goals.
WAYS TO PRACTICE SELF CARE-
BALANCED DIET-  There is no need to restrict yourself from foods but eating a healthy, balanced diet is crucial for maintaining physical health. Try to include plenty of fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and whole grains in your diet.
EXERCISE REGULARLY- Regular physical activity can help reduce stress, improve mood, and boost overall health. This doesn't necessarily mean going to the gym - it could be anything from a brisk walk to a yoga class
GET ENOUGH SLEEP-  Aim for 7-9 hours of sleep per night. Establish a regular sleep schedule and create a relaxing bedtime routine to improve sleep quality.
STAY HYDRATED-  Drinking enough water each day is important for overall health. Try to aim for at least 8 glasses per day.
TAKE BREAKS- Make sure to take regular breaks throughout the day, especially if you're working or studying. This can help prevent burnout and improve productivity.
DO THINGS YOU ENJOY- Make time for hobbies or activities you enjoy. This could be anything from reading a book to playing a sport to painting. 
  CELEBRATE SMALL THINGS
Don't wait until you've reached your big goal to celebrate. Celebrate small wins along the way to keep your motivation high. This could be treating yourself to something you enjoy, or simply taking a moment to acknowledge your achievement.
REFLECTING ON THE PAST YEAR
Think about how the past year went. Did you learn anything? Did you reach new goals? If you don't the answers to these questions, I recommend further examining your year!!
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cheetabites · 25 days ago
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☆彡 peppers ˳༄꠶
character: hwang in-ho / 001 / frontman
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˳༄꠶ summary: five sfw and nsfw general headcannons for the frontman
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sfw headcannons
★ i truly believe he’d be a devoted partner to you; he literally accepted loans / bribes - loosing his job in the process - just to help his sick wife and eventually entered the squid games just to pay for her treatment
★ when he was declared victorious he was so happy to go home. but when he arrived back and was met with the news that his wife had already died, he fell into a raging depression; scapegoating the blame of her death onto others due to his immense grief. eventually he decided to go back to the games because he didn’t believe there was really anything out there for him anymore
★ deep down there’s a small part of himself that regrets giving jun-ho his kidney - if he had sold it he could’ve payed for the treatment earlier; but this hard truth was something he tried his best to repress because he felt ashamed for thinking that way, after all he still loved his brother
★ he knows about the organ harvesting. while he’s not directly involved in it, he makes no effort to stop it - if anything, he thinks it’s a good use since it would be a waste to incinerate usable organs, and because it’ll ‘help’ other people like his deceased wife (people who need transplants)
★ he still carries a photograph of his wife even while running the games, although he makes sure to never leave it out in the open. it’s always on his person one way or another. when he looks at her picture though, it’s a brief period of clarity where he reflects on his actions and what she’d think of him if she saw what he did and continues to do
nsfw headcannons
★ he’s a dom, no doubt about it. although in the beginning of your relationship he’s more of a hard dom, the further you progress with your relationship waters that down a bit; he needs a deep emotional connection with his partner to get there though
★ he’s really into marking your body; primarily though, it’s mostly hickies that he leaves on your skin - usually on your neck or on your thighs. he wouldn’t leave anything deeper than tiny purple bruises. to him, leaving bruises - that come from hard impact play, spanking, ect - on your body is unsightly and it leaves him disgusted
★ one of his favorite sex positions is definitely doggystyle. he seems to be the guy that’ll lay his arm around your front just to pull you close, so he can watch you tilt your head back with that look of ecstasy. he sometimes wraps a tie around your neck to pull your head back if he wants to fuck hard and fast
★ whenever you guys are fucking in missionary, he’ll have one of his hands wrapped around your neck as he degrades you - sometimes adding some faux pity into his tone whenever you whine that it’s too much or that it’s too big
★ he overstimulates you as a punishment. saying things like “oh now you’re complaining that it’s too much when you couldn’t even control yourself while i was away” or “you say you can’t take anymore even though you keep creaming all over my fingers, such a dirty whore”
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the end! i hope you enjoyed <3!
© cheetabites. don’t translate, claim or repost my works on any platform. jan 3 2025.
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the-joy-of-knowledge · 1 year ago
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Becoming an Intelligent Woman
My Dears,
There is no greater goal than being a fine woman who is intelligent, kind, and elegant. As much as we all want to be described with these adjectives, it takes a great amount of discipline to get there. It is very doable only if you are ready to put in the work.
Here are steps you can add to your routine in the next 4 weeks that will make you 1% more intelligent than you were before. This is a process that should become a habit not a goal. It is long term, however, I want you to devote just 4 weeks into doing these steps first and recognize the changes that follow.
Watch documentaries: This is the easiest step, we all have access to Youtube. Youtube has a great number of content on art, history, technology, food, science etc that will increase your knowledge and pique your curiosity. I really did not know much about world history especially from the perspective of World war 1 & 2, the roaring 20s, Age of Enlightenment, Jazz era, monarchies etc but with several channels dedicated to breaking down history into easily digestible forms. I have in the last 4 weeks immersed myself into these documentaries. Here are a few I watched:
The fall of monarchies
The Entire History of United Kingdom
The Eight Ages of Greece
World War 1
World War 2
The Roaring '20s
The Cuisine of the Enlightenment
2. Read Classics: I recommend starting with short classics so that you do not get easily discouraged. Try to make reading easy and interesting especially if you struggle with finishing a book. Why classics? You see, if you never went to an exclusive private school in Europe or America with well crafted syllabus that emphasized philosophy, history, art, and literary classics, you might want to know what is felt like and for me this was a strong reason. Asides that, there is so much wisdom and knowledge available in these books. In these books, you gain insights to the authors mind, the historical context of the era, the ingenuity of the author, the hidden messages, and the cultural impact of these books. Most importantly, you develop your personal philosophy from the stories and lessons you have accumulated from the lives of the characters in the books you read. Here are classics to get you started:
Animal Farm by George Orwell
Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë
The Great Gatsby by F Scott Fitzgerald
Candide by Voltaire
Paradise lost by John Milton
3. Study the lives of people who inspire you: I dedicate one month to each person that fascinates me. I read their biography (date of birth, background, death, influences, work, style, education, personal life) For this month, I decided to study Frank Lloyd Wright because I was fascinated by the Guggenheim Museum in New York. I began to read about his influence in American Architecture (Organic architecture, Prairie School, Usonian style), his tumultuous personal life, his difficult relationship with his mentor (Louis Sullivan), his most iconic works etc. By the end of the year I would have learned the ins and outs of people I am inspired by through books and documentaries. Here are other people I plan to learn more about:
Winston Churchill
Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis
Ada Lovelace
Benjamin Franklin
Helen Keller
John Nash
Isabella Stewart Gardner
Caroline Herrera
Ernest Hemingway
Catherine the Great
Ann Lowe
My dears, I hope you enjoyed this read. I cannot wait to write more on my journey to becoming a fine woman. I urge you to do this for four weeks and see what changes you notice. Make sure to write as well, it is important to document your progress.
Cheers to a very prosperous 2024!
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kiwriteswords · 27 days ago
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Finer Things [Aaron Hotchner x High-Maintenance!Reader]
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Masterlist || Ao3||Word Count: 6k|| AN: Here we are! This took a little longer than expected, but I think I like how this one turned out!
Tags/Warnings: no use of y/n, canon-typical themes, high-maintenance reader, female reader, progression of relationship, simp!Hotch, feminine reader, Jack exists but is only briefly mentioned, BAU reader, materialistic reader, Garcia the helpful friend, flirty banter, mild language
Summary: You're a stylish...arguably high-maintenance BAU agent who unexpectedly falls for your straightforward and grounded partner, Aaron Hotchner. As you both tackle cases and life’s surprises, you learn to blend your love for the finer things with his practical approach, discovering a deep and enduring connection.
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Hotch’s office door clicked softly as you knocked, barely audible over the hum of the precinct around you. The frame filled almost instantly with your form—pristine as always, from your flawlessly styled hair down to the heels that added an effortless grace to your every step.
“Got a minute?” you asked, your voice as smooth and composed as the latte you held in one hand, the steam still curling lazily up from the cup.
Hotch stepped aside, allowing you entrance. “Of course,” he said, though he knew his afternoon was already crammed with meetings and reports. For you, though, he made time—something the rest of the team had noticed and often teased him about. But what could he say? Aaron Hotchner, stoic and steadfast, had indeed developed a soft spot for you.
As you settled into the chair across from his desk, Hotch couldn’t help but admire the meticulous way you organized your space on the table. Your designer bag was set precisely to the right, not a strap out of place. He often wondered how someone so particular could thrive in the chaotic unpredictability of the BAU.
“So, what did you think of the profile?” you began, breaking into his thoughts. Your eyes were bright, lively—a stark contrast to his own, which often carried the weight of the job.
“It’s thorough. You have a knack for getting into the unsub’s head,” Hotch replied, his voice firm yet carrying a hint of warmth reserved mostly for you.
Your smile widened, pleased. “I do try,” you quipped, stirring your latte leisurely. “But I think it could use a bit more… je ne sais quoi, don’t you think?”
Hotch raised an eyebrow, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips. “And what would you suggest?”
“Well,” you leaned forward, the light catching your earrings just so. “If I were him, I’d be more careful about where I left my clues. Too sloppy. Maybe he needs a lesson in organization from me.”
Hotch chuckled, the sound more natural than he intended. “I think he’d be horrified at the idea.”
“Good,” you grinned, sitting back with satisfaction. “Then he’d know how I feel about unorganized data.”
Moving to the round table, the rest of the team began to filter into the office for the briefing, and Morgan threw a teasing glance your way. “Looks like Hotch is getting his daily dose of high maintenance,” he commented, a playful smirk on his face.
Prentiss elbowed him lightly, smiling in your direction. “Leave them alone. If anyone can get Hotch to lighten up, it’s her.”
Hotch cleared his throat, signaling the start of the briefing, but he couldn’t deny the truth in their observations. You brought a lightness to his often too-heavy life, a splash of color to the monochrome routine.
As the meeting progressed, your contributions were not just insightful but infused with a vibrancy that lifted the somber mood typical of these sessions. Each time you spoke, Hotch found his attention drawn not just to your words but to the way you expressed them—with a confidence and a flair that was uniquely yours. When you directed a comment towards him, accompanied by a playful raise of your eyebrows, there was an underlying challenge there, as if you were coaxing him out from behind his well-constructed barriers.
Your laughter, light and unguarded, filled the room at one point when you poked fun at the unsub’s choice of hideouts, suggesting even you could find a better hiding place during your shopping trips. The team chuckled, and even Hotch’s lips twitched into a smile—your cheer infectious, your presence undeniably compelling.
As the team began to disperse, you lingered over your notes, your meticulous nature evident as you aligned your papers and recapped your pens with a precision that spoke of a deeper need for order—a trait Hotch could appreciate, perhaps because it mirrored his own.
Hotch watched you, the way the light caught the highlights in your hair and the meticulous care you took with even the smallest task. He remained in his seat, an internal debate raging within him. He was the Unit Chief, always in control, always composed. But around you, those walls he meticulously maintained seemed less formidable, more permeable.
Finally, he stood, his decision made, propelled by a force he hadn’t fully acknowledged until now. Approaching you, he noted the slight surprise in your movements as you looked up. His voice, when he spoke, was steady, but there was an undercurrent of something more, something deeper.
“Dinner tonight?” he asked, the invitation hanging between them, heavier than the casual manner he attempted to portray.
You paused, a pen still in your hand, and met his gaze. The flicker of surprise was quickly replaced by a slow-spreading smile that warmed your eyes. “Trying to keep up with my high standards, Hotch?” you teased, the challenge back in your voice, but this time it was laced with an unmistakable warmth.
“I think I’m ready to try,” Hotch replied, his voice low, honest. The corners of his mouth turned up in a rare, genuine smile that seemed to reach his eyes, softening the usual hardness there.
“Then it’s a date,” you declared, your voice light but carrying a weight that filled the room with a promise of something new, something thrilling.
As you gathered your belongings and left, your heels clicking assertively against the floor, Hotch watched you go, a sense of anticipation building within him. It was a feeling foreign yet exhilarating, stirring something within him that had lain dormant.
He realized then, as the distance grew between you, that what the team jokingly called his ‘weakness’ was perhaps his most profound revelation. In you, Aaron Hotchner found not just a challenge but a vibrant counterpart who could match his steps in life’s intricate dance. With you, the future seemed less daunting, more vivid—colored by the finer things, in every possible way.
Since that first dinner, a subtle shift had occurred in the dynamics between Hotch and you. What started as a casual outing evolved into a series of clandestine meetings, each encounter deepening the bond that was swiftly becoming an integral part of his daily life. The secrecy was necessary—not just for the sake of professionalism within the team but to preserve the unique world that had begun to flourish between the two of you.
Hotch found himself anticipating your texts, which often popped up on his phone with playful emojis and witty remarks about everything from case files to the peculiar habits of their local barista. You managed to make even the mundane seem amusing, and Hotch, ever the stoic leader, found his day brightening with each notification.
One evening, as Hotch returned home from a particularly grueling case, he found a small package at his doorstep. Inside was a high-end espresso machine—a gift from you, complete with a note: "For your home office, so you can enjoy a proper latte without braving the outside world. Think of me when you use it." It was both a luxurious gesture and so quintessentially you, blending high maintenance with thoughtful consideration.
Hotch couldn’t help but smile as he set up the machine in his kitchen. It wasn’t something he would have ever purchased for himself, but now, brewing a cup in the quiet of the morning, he found a new appreciation for the ritual. It reminded him of you—how you’d insist on the perfect temperature, the ideal foam-to-espresso ratio, details he’d once overlooked but now found endearing.
At work, these small infiltrations into his life were becoming more apparent. You had taken to adjusting the small things around him, straightening the papers on his desk, sometimes replacing his usual stark office supplies with items that had a bit more personality—a stapler in polished chrome, sleek and efficient like the espresso machine, or pens that wrote so smoothly he found excuses to handwrite notes he would typically type.
Hotch had to admit, albeit reluctantly, that your influence was a welcome one. It was as if you were slowly coloring in parts of his world that he hadn’t even realized were so monochrome. And when you both sat down at the round table, reviewing case files together, the subtle touches—the way your knee would gently brush against his, or how you’d share a quick, knowing look over a shared inside joke—added layers to their days that Hotch hadn’t anticipated but found he no longer wanted to go without.
One afternoon, caught in a rare moment of downtime, Hotch found himself at the local shopping center, standing before a display of designer ties. He remembered you commenting on how a splash of color could brighten his usual ensemble of dark suits and somber expressions. With a critical eye, he selected one that was a soft shade--something that would match your eyes, he thought, a private acknowledgment of the space you were coming to occupy in his life.
That evening, when he wore the tie, the team didn’t miss the change. “Look at Hotch, finally taking some fashion tips from the best,” Morgan teased, nudging you as you both arrived for the briefing.
You shot Hotch a playful wink, and he responded with a slight nod, a silent conversation passing between them. Yes, you were changing him, but perhaps, Hotch considered as he adjusted the new tie subtly, this change was not just inevitable but necessary.
For Aaron Hotchner, known for his rigor and restraint, the gentle invasion of your high-maintenance habits into his disciplined life was less a disruption and more a revelation. Each new preference, each shared secret, wove a richer tapestry into his days. And as he looked across the table at you, he realized with a clarity that surprised him, that these threads, once so foreign, were now essential to the fabric of his life.
The rarity of a day off was not something Hotch took lightly, especially with Jack away on a Boy Scout trip. He had considered a quiet day at home, perhaps catching up on some reading or simply enjoying the peace. However, as he was contemplating his solitary plans, you texted him about your own plans for the day—getting your nails done, a routine you indulged in every few weeks.
"I’m off to maintain my high standards," your message read, accompanied by a laughing emoji. "Care to join me for a change of scenery?"
The invitation was unexpected. The thought of spending his day off in a nail salon was not something Hotch would have ever considered before meeting you. Yet, the idea of accompanying you, of sharing in something that was a part of your routine, held an appeal he couldn’t deny.
"Sure, why not?" Hotch texted back, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth as he imagined your reaction.
At the salon, you greeted him with a bright smile and a quick peck on the cheek. "Never thought I’d see the day Aaron Hotchner steps into a nail salon willingly," you teased, leading him inside.
The salon was a buzz of activity, a stark contrast to the usual seriousness of his work environment. You introduced him to your nail technician, a friendly woman named Lisa who greeted him with a warmth that seemed to radiate throughout the room.
As Lisa started on your nails, you chatted animatedly about the colors and designs. Hotch found himself pulled into a conversation about the merits of various shades—a discussion he never thought he’d have, yet here he was, weighing in on whether 'Midnight Blue' was a better choice than 'Stormy Grey'.
"You know, you could get something done too. A manicure perhaps? It’s quite relaxing," you suggested, your eyes sparkling with mischief.
Hotch raised an eyebrow, considering it. "What would the team think if I showed up with polished nails?"
"They’d think you’re embracing the finer things in life," you replied with a laugh. "But maybe just a clear coat. We wouldn’t want to give Morgan too much ammunition."
Surprisingly, Hotch agreed. As Lisa began to work on his nails, he found the experience unexpectedly soothing. The gentle handling, the focus on something so trivial yet intimate, was a stark departure from his day-to-day life.
"So, how does it feel to be pampered?" you asked, watching him with an amused expression.
"Strangely relaxing," Hotch admitted. "I can see the appeal."
As Lisa finished, you both sat under the nail dryers. Hotch looked over at you, taking in the relaxed ease of your posture, and the genuine smile on your face. It was these moments, he realized, that he cherished deeply—the simple pleasures shared, the barriers between professional and personal blurring into something beautifully ordinary.
"You know, I’m glad you invited me," Hotch said, his voice soft amid the hum of the salon. "It’s nice, sharing this part of your world."
You reached over, your hand finding his. "I’m glad you’re here, Aaron. It means more than you know."
As they left the salon, Hotch felt a lightness he hadn’t experienced in a long time. The day had been uneventful by most standards, yet for him, it was a precious insight into the everyday joys of the person who had unexpectedly become his closest confidant.
The team's discovery of his relationship with you was as inevitable as it was unintended. It began one morning when Garcia, ever observant, noticed the faintest of smiles on Hotch’s lips as he read a text from you. It was nothing overt, just the subtle lift of his mood, but it was enough to pique her interest.
“Spill it, Hotch. You’ve been smiling more these days,” Garcia prodded as they gathered in the briefing room, her tone teasing but her eyes sharp with curiosity.
Hotch, caught slightly off-guard, managed to maintain his composure. “It’s just been a good morning,” he replied smoothly, hoping his nonchalance would deflect further inquiry.
Garcia, however, was not so easily dissuaded. “Uh huh,” she hummed, giving him a knowing look but dropping the subject in the presence of the rest of the team.
The next clue came unintentionally from you during a case briefing. You were discussing a particularly challenging aspect of the case when you casually mentioned a small detail—a detail that Hotch had shared with you in confidence during one of your dinners together.
As you spoke, Reid’s head tilted slightly, his brow furrowing in that characteristic way when he was putting pieces together. “That’s an interesting observation,” he remarked, glancing between Hotch and you. “Not many would’ve caught that.”
Hotch met Reid’s gaze, a silent acknowledgment passing between them. Reid’s expression softened into a subtle smile, and he nodded slightly, turning his attention back to the files in front of him.
Morgan and JJ were the next to catch on. It happened in the field, during a tense moment when you instinctively reached for Hotch’s hand. It was a brief touch, meant to be reassuring, but Morgan and JJ caught the action from the corner of their eye.
Later, as they regrouped at the SUV, Morgan clapped Hotch on the shoulder. “You know you can tell us, right? We’re family here,” he said in a low voice, his look pointed but friendly.
Hotch simply nodded, the corners of his mouth twitching upwards. “I know, Derek,” he said, grateful for the support he knew they would offer.
Prentiss figured it out during a late-night coffee run when she saw you both at a small cafe, your heads close together, laughing softly over shared stories. She didn’t approach, respecting your privacy, but the next day, her smile was a bit wider when she greeted you both.
“It’s good to see you happy, Hotch,” she said quietly as she passed by his office, her words meant only for him.
By the time Rossi found out, it seemed that most of the team had already accepted the new dynamic with characteristic adaptability. Rossi, ever the father figure, simply raised his glass to Hotch during their next team dinner, a silent toast that spoke volumes.
“You’ve got a good thing, Aaron. Don’t let the job get in the way,” Rossi advised later, when they were alone, his voice low and earnest.
Hotch appreciated the wisdom; knowing the balance between personal happiness and professional duty was a fine line to walk.
As the team gradually discovered the relationship, what surprised Hotch most was not the fact that they found out, but the ease with which they accepted it. Their teasing was gentle, their support unwavering, and in their acceptance, Hotch found not just confirmation of his feelings for you but also a deeper appreciation for the team he considered his second family.
In this newfound openness, Hotch realized that his relationship with you did not weaken his leadership; rather, it enriched the very fabric of his life, both at work and beyond. With each passing day, as you both navigate the complexities of a relationship built amidst the demands of the BAU, Hotch found himself not just accepting but embracing the vibrant color you brought into his once-monochrome world.
The integration of your meticulous routines into Hotch's daily life was gradual, almost imperceptible at first, until one day he found himself deeply enmeshed in the particulars of your high-maintenance habits. What began as playful observations soon became cherished moments of his day, each routine offering a glimpse into the meticulous and vibrant world you inhabited.
Every evening, as you both prepared for bed, Hotch would lean against the bathroom doorway, watching as you engaged in your elaborate skincare routine. The array of creams, serums, and tools was impressive, and he'd often raise an eyebrow in mock incredulity as you explained the purpose of each one.
“Do you really need all of this?” Hotch would ask, his tone light and teasing as you applied a night serum with precise, practiced motions.
“Absolutely,” you’d reply without missing a beat, your reflection in the mirror smiling back at him. “It’s about maintaining standards, Aaron. You of all people should understand that.”
“I thought we were just going to bed, not preparing for a photo shoot,” Hotch would retort, the corners of his lips twitching into a smile.
“It’s called preventive maintenance,” you’d say, tapping the side of your nose with a finger. “One day, you’ll thank me when we’re both ninety, and I still look seventy.”
Hotch couldn’t help but laugh, the sound mingling with the soft notes of the evening. He had to admit, there was a certain peace in these nightly rituals, a tranquility that had seeped into the crevices of his once rigid routine.
Sometimes, you would catch him watching and pull him into the routine, applying a bit of moisturizer to his face with gentle, coaxing motions. “You’ll feel better,” you’d assure him, and he’d comply, not because he believed in the miraculous claims of the products but because it meant more moments shared with you.
On weekends, the rituals would extend to mornings. You’d take your time selecting an outfit, coordinating accessories and makeup with an artist’s eye for detail. Hotch would sit on the bed, coffee in hand, offering the occasional nod or hum of approval as you held up two nearly identical pairs of shoes, asking for his opinion.
“What do you think? The matte or the glossy?” you’d ask, holding them up for him to see.
“The matte,” Hotch would decide after a moment’s consideration. “It’s subtler.”
“Subtle,” you’d repeat, considering this. “I like it. Subtle but effective. Kind of like you.”
The routine wasn’t just about vanity or upkeep—it was a dance, a way of you expressing yourself and inviting him into your world. Hotch found himself missing these interactions whenever you were at your own apartment. The bathroom felt too empty, the mornings too quick and utilitarian. He missed the scent of your skincare products, the sound of your voice explaining the benefits of jasmine oil, or the way you’d ask his opinion on things he’d never considered before.
Even his morning routine had adapted; where once a quick shave sufficed, he now found himself opening your moisturizer, the scent a comforting reminder of you. It was a small concession to the routines you loved, a way of keeping you close even when miles apart.
Through these shared routines, Hotch learned more than just the importance of exfoliation or the difference between matte and glossy finishes. He learned the value of slowing down, of savoring the quiet moments together before the chaos of the day set in. Each ritual, each routine you shared, wove deeper connections between them, turning mundane moments into cherished memories and in doing so, seamlessly blending his life with yours.
With your birthday on the horizon, Hotch was well aware of the intricacies involved in selecting the perfect gift. Your independence and flair for purchasing exactly what you wanted, when you wanted, left little room for him to dazzle you with something unexpected. Yet, the desire to surprise and delight you was strong; he wanted to be the doting boyfriend who could still manage to sweep you off your feet.
One morning, as he was choosing a tie for work, you playfully suggested one that would "match beautifully with my purse—if I had the right shade." The comment was offhand, perhaps even forgetful of the collection you already owned, but it sparked an idea in Hotch's mind.
Later that day, armed with determination, Hotch sought out Garcia. He found her busy at her workstations, screens flickering with data.
"Garcia, could I get your help with something a bit more... personal?" Hotch began, hesitating slightly as he ventured into unfamiliar territory.
Garcia swiveled in her chair, her expression instantly shifting to one of eager attentiveness. "Of course, Hotch! What do you need? Secret admirer codes cracked? Background checks for mysterious suitors?" she quipped, her tone light.
"Actually, I need advice on buying a purse," Hotch admitted, and briefly explained the situation.
"A purse? Oh, for you know who?! This is going to be fun!" Garcia clapped her hands, her earlier levity shifting into focused enthusiasm. "Okay, first things first, we need something as unique and classy as she is. Let’s dive into the world of designer handbags."
Garcia guided him through various high-end brands, explaining the appeal of each. "These are timeless," she pointed out, scrolling through an array of sophisticated designs. "But knowing our girl, something with both function and a high fashion quotient would be ideal."
Hotch listened, absorbing details about textures, colors, and what each brand symbolized. They finally narrowed it down to a few choices, each one reflecting a different aspect of your personality and style.
"This one here," Garcia pointed at a sleek, modern satchel with minimalist design but luxurious detailing, "seems like it could be the perfect accessory for her. It’s stylish but not ostentatious, much like how she approaches her work and personal style."
"It looks great," Hotch agreed, imagining how it would look draped over your shoulder. He made a mental note of the bag and the brand, deciding to do a little more research before making the final purchase.
"Good luck, Hotch! She's going to love whatever you choose because it's from you," Garcia smiled warmly, giving him a thumbs-up as he thanked her and left.
Back at Hotch’s apartment, as you both moved through your evening routine, Hotch found opportunities to subtly probe for more of your preferences without giving away his intentions.
"So, if you were to splurge on something frivolous, what would it be?" Hotch asked casually as you were both settling down with a glass of wine.
"Frivolous?" you chuckled, giving him a playful look. "Isn’t everything I buy somewhat frivolous to you, Mr. Practicality?"
"Perhaps," Hotch conceded with a smile, "but indulge me."
"A purse," you said after a moment, a mischievous twinkle in your eye. "A really good, outrageously and stupidly expensive purse that makes me feel like a million bucks when I carry it."
"Sounds like a worthy investment," Hotch replied, his tone teasing but thoughtful. Your eyes met, and there was a spark of something that went beyond the casual banter—a shared understanding and appreciation for these little confessions.
Hotch tucked away every piece of information, each helping him build towards the moment he would present you with the perfect birthday gift. It was more than just a purse; it was a symbol of his attentiveness to your desires and his wish to celebrate everything you were.
But the birthday Hotch had planned for you was supposed to be special, a day to celebrate you in style, with every detail tailored to your liking. Instead, duty called in the form of a particularly tough case that dragged on much longer than anyone had anticipated. The hours turned into days, and by the time it was over, everyone was exhausted, physically and emotionally drained.
As the team began packing up, you sighed heavily, the weight of the last few days evident in your slumped shoulders. "I just want to go back to my apartment," you murmured. "I ran out of clothes, and I forgot half my skincare stuff in the rush out."
Hotch, who had been hoping to salvage what was left of the day, felt a twinge of disappointment. "You could grab what you need and come back to my place," he suggested, trying to keep his tone light, though concern etched his features. He’d go to your place if he could, but Jack was waiting for him. 
You shook your head, fatigue lining your face. "I'm just so tired, Aaron. Let’s just celebrate tomorrow, okay?" Your voice held a note of finality, but also a plea for understanding.
He knew he should let it go…give you the space you needed, but a part of him—the part that had been quietly contemplating a more significant step in your relationship—spoke up. "I was going to bring this up over dinner," Hotch began, his voice steady despite the chaos of the day, "but maybe this is the right moment. You and your... elaborate routines should just move in with me."
Your fatigue momentarily gave way to surprise. "Do you know what you’re getting into? My high maintenance might take over your space," you teased, a faint smile playing at your lips despite the exhaustion.
"Yes," Hotch said firmly, his gaze intense. "I know exactly what I’m getting into, and I love it. I miss it when you’re not there."
You looked at him, searching his face for any sign of hesitation. Finding none, your smile grew, and the weariness seemed to lift slightly. "You really want me and my half a suitcase of skincare products moving in?"
"Every last bottle and brush," Hotch confirmed, his voice softening. "It’s part of who you are, and I want all of you every day. Not just on good days or birthdays, but every challenging and tiring day too."
Your eyes softened, and you stepped closer, leaning into him slightly. "Okay, but we’re getting a bigger bathroom cabinet," you stipulated, your tone light but sincere.
"It’s a deal," Hotch agreed, wrapping an arm around you. The case had taken much from you both, but at this moment, a new door was opening—a commitment that promised to blend your lives in ways beyond shared cases and briefings.
As you both headed back, the weight of the case still lingering, there was a new undercurrent of hope, of shared futures and bathroom cabinets, a testament to the resilience of your bond.
You decided to pick up a few essentials from your apartment and spend the night at Hotch's place--now your place, too, despite your tiredness. Hotch, feeling a mix of relief and excitement, drove you to your apartment, waiting as you gathered your things.
Inside, you moved efficiently, albeit with a tired grace, packing your cherished skincare products and several outfits. Hotch leaned against the doorway, watching as you filled a small suitcase with what seemed to him an elaborate array of potions and tools. Each item was carefully selected, a ritual that he found both fascinating and slightly amusing.
“You sure you’ve got enough there for just one night?” Hotch teased lightly, his eyes twinkling with humor.
You glanced over your shoulder, a playful smirk on your lips. “This is the streamlined version, believe it or not. You might have to rent the apartment next door.”
“I’ll consult the landlord tomorrow,” Hotch quipped, the corners of his mouth lifting in a smile.
Back at his apartment, as you began setting out your skincare products in the bathroom, Hotch watched for a moment, his mind returning to the gift he’d carefully hidden away—something he hoped would make your day a little brighter after the tough case.
“Hey,” Hotch called softly, capturing your attention as you meticulously arranged your items. “I have something for you. I was saving it for a proper celebration, but I think tonight is as good a time as any.”
Your curiosity piqued, you followed him to the living room, where he retrieved a small, elegantly wrapped box from a drawer. Handing it to you, he watched as your eyes widened slightly, a mix of surprise and anticipation lighting up your features.
You unwrapped the box with a gentle precision, and as you lifted the lid and saw the purse—a beautiful, designer pocketbook that perfectly matched the sophisticated style you cherished—your expression transformed into one of sheer delight.
“Aaron, this is beautiful,” you breathed out, carefully pulling the purse from the box. You admired the craftsmanship, running your fingers over the smooth leather and the detailed stitching.
“It reminded me of you,” Hotch said, his voice sincere. “Elegant, practical, and incredibly stylish. Happy Birthday.”
You looked up at him, your eyes shining not just from the beauty of the gift but from the thoughtfulness behind it. “I love it,” you said, stepping closer to wrap your arms around him in a heartfelt embrace. “Thank you; this is the best end to a rough day.”
Hotch held you close, his heart swelling with the joy of seeing you so happy. “There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to make you smile like that,” he murmured into your hair, feeling the weight of the case and the fatigue of the day finally begin to lift.
As you pulled back slightly, still holding the purse, you teased, “Does this mean I get a new purse for every rough case?”
“Birthdays,” Hotch corrected with a gentle smile, his gaze softening as he added, “You make it incredibly hard for me to spoil you more than I already wish to.”
You laughed, a sound that Hotch had come to cherish deeply. “I’ll try to be less self-sufficient in the future,” you quipped, clutching the new purse a little closer as if it were a treasured award.
“I wouldn’t change a thing about your independence,” Hotch replied earnestly. “It’s one of the many things I admire about you. But allow me the occasional indulgence of spoiling you, especially on days like today.”
The purse, an elegant and thoughtful gift, lay between you on the coffee table, symbolizing not just a celebration of your birthday but of the new phase in your relationship. The evening settled into a comfortable rhythm, the earlier tension from the case dissolving into the background as you both enjoyed the simple pleasure of each other’s company.
With the challenges of the case behind you and the warmth of your shared space around you, Hotch felt a profound sense of contentment. This was more than just a birthday celebration—it was a reaffirmation of your partnership, a testament to how deeply your lives had intertwined.
As you both relaxed into the sofa, the conversation drifted from light teasing to deeper, more introspective topics. Every so often, your hand would brush against the purse, a physical reminder of Hotch’s affection and attention to what brought you joy.
“Thank you, Aaron,” you said again, your voice lower, more reflective as the night wore on. “For understanding me, even when I think I don’t need anything.”
Hotch reached over, his hand finding yours, squeezing it gently. “You don’t need to thank me for that,” he murmured. “It’s just another part of our journey together. And I’m grateful for every step we take, side by side.”
The purse remained on the table, a beacon of new beginnings and mutual understanding, as you both shared the quiet comfort of knowing you were exactly where you were meant to be.
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Tag List:
@zaddyhotch @estragos @todorokishoe24 @looking1016  @khxna @rousethemouse @averyhotchner @reidfile @bernelflo @lover-of-books-and-tea @frickin-bats @sleepysongbirdsings @justyourusualash @person-005 @iyskgd @hiireadstuff @kcch-ns
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blueberrypancakesworld · 1 month ago
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Caracalla in a relationship - sfw/nsfw
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Caracalla x younger!reader
warning : smutish (not too graphic), cuddling, kissing, tiny comfort, Caracalla is his own tiny warning
info : Caracalla as sweet as he is is a double-edged sword on the one hand gentle and playful on the other obsessive and possessive now i hope you enjoy reading ;) There will be also one with an older!reader
masterlist
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SFW
°From the moment it became clear that he and his brother needed an heir, Caracalla also had to choose a wife, a bride from the surrounding areas, one that made the most political sense. Even though his interests lay elsewhere and he had gotten into arguments with his brother, even in his lucid moments he had to realize that Geta was right, ,,Then help me find my wife, brother” he had asked him, let go of Dundus and knew that even his madness could not last forever, that in the moments when he was in charge, he had to take responsibility, as awful as it may seem.
A responsibility he searched through for weeks, from mosaic pictures to written letters to the day they had parties organized and invited all the princesses and daughters who had royal blood to show, ,,We've been sitting here for hours now, are you even paying attention?” he hardly noticed his brother's question. Hours had passed since the party and everything still seemed to have made no progress until the blue eyes found something furry in the crowd, rising wordlessly the blond walked through the crowd with a curious look. Ignoring the guests, almost shoving them aside, he found himself in the room with her, pretty and delicate, a look of joy and on her lap a tiger cub, ,,What's his name?” Caracalla wanted to know and knelt down to her.
°With this question, two animals and coins flowing, the emperor had apparently found his wife. Although only a little younger, this seemed to suit the emperor more, the joy and energy he had during his fits seemed to be well controlled by his wife, ,,Sometimes he's a playful, brutal child just to be my husband again, but I love him just the way he is, believe me Geta,” she assured her brother-in-law. She knew how important his brother was to Geta and tried to fulfill this role as best she could, starting with the morning make-up, which usually ended in a laughing embrace and Caracalla giving her a kiss on the cheek.
°Especially the cuddling and the short kisses seemed to calm Caracalla down when something didn't go the way he wanted it to. Whether it was during a defeat in the Colosseum, at a party when the music wasn't right or even when Dundus didn't listen to him, ,,We'll manage, I promise," she always said and her hand slid to his, her smile lighting him up before he gave her a short but heartfelt kiss, giggling when his make-up stuck to her skin only to wipe it away somewhat clumsily with his toga. But as long as he smiled and she had him, they would manage any of his fits together.
°His hand wouldn't leave hers, no matter if it was at breakfast, where they often played with the food and fed Dundus, which Geta let pass with a small smile. ,,I have a surprise today at the Coloseum,” Caracalla said, sharing her joy and curiosity as they entered the Coloseum together, the inhabitants celebrating the empress and sharing her love of animal fights. A fight in which she clung to Caracalla who clung to her as they let tigers into the ring, ,,You will win my pretty cats!” she shouted and not only Caracalla but also the spectators joined in as the feline predators attacked the gladiators. There were little surprises of new collars for her pet or she gave Caracalla a little new dress for Dundus it was a level on which the two got along by day as well as by night...
NSFW
°They loved each other that was out of the question, above all the how, when and where was something that set Caracalla apart from his brother. As much as he lost himself in his mind, lost himself too much in the madness, the more he needed his wife with him, on him and above all in his bedchamber. When torches illuminate the two of them, Caracalla not only wants to be entertained, he also wants to enjoy earthly pleasures together with his wife. With sweet grapes and a little wine, which is all just a little hesitation of the big picture before his hands lay on her and the first thing he does is to undress her, ,,You're even more beautiful without it!" he chuckled and looked at her body in front of him as if spellbound.
°Even though she was only a little younger than him, he took his role and especially his power seriously on nights like this, ,,Trust your emperor, it'll be fun,” he promised before kissing his way down her body, even though there was always a smile on his lips, there was a look of lust in his eyes, a silent desire for her and no one else. She was his and not his brother's, she was his alone and no one else's, a thing he made clear to her with every kiss that turned into a little bite, every little bite marring her skin and turning him on more and more when he saw what he had done to her.
°Caracalla is someone who needs entertainment, whether it's new games in the coloseum or new methods in the bedroom, everything that amuses the blond needs to be played out. He won't stop in the bedroom either, demanding to try it out rather than responding to his wife, ,,You'll look beautiful with the rope like my prey,” he announced, holding out the rope and showing her the parchments with various pictures and instructions. Whether of ropes his blue eyes looked fascinated as her body was wrapped with it, as the marks remained on her skin and he kissed her, knowing that he could always push her a little further because in the end he was still the Emperor of Rome and she his wife.
°Up to daggers and blood, he would try anything. Watching the blade press against her naked body a little harder and harder, watching her skin break slightly as her hips pushed harder against hers, “Beautiful!“ he groaned and her whimpers were drowned in his licking as he experienced his coloseum tears, the desire finally soothing, finally feeling the blood on his hands as he stroked the wounds, as he bit her and heard her sweet sounds, it was like music to his ears, the best concert, the best entertainment his beloved wife could give him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
@cottoncandiescupcakes , @k-yurieee , @qardasngan , @somepallings , @songbirdmunson , @sweeteststing
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okwonyo · 2 months ago
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INTO YOU, 或 𓈒𓈒 navigating a secret relationship.
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❛𝗀𝗈𝗍 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗒𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝗐𝖺𝗍𝖼𝗁𝗂𝗇’ 𝗎𝗌. 𝗌𝗈, 𝖻𝖺𝖻𝗒, 𝗅𝖾𝗍’𝗌 𝗄𝖾𝖾𝗉 𝗂𝗍 𝗌𝖾𝖼𝗋𝖾𝗍 𓈒𓈒 ❜
𝒾 ⠀⦂ ⠀ 엔하이픈 ୨୧ f ╱ r! 16OO fluff ── non idol au skinship kissing ⠀ 。。 ⠀ ( 𝑜𝑜𝑒𝑢𝑣𝑟𝑒𝑠 )
지아 ⠀⦂ ⠀i miss summer and i desperately need winter to come huhu >< idea from my favorite oomf @soov 🎀 enjoy !
( ˊᗜˋreblogs&feedbacks · C𝑙𝑖CK )
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HEESEUNG
the cold air brushes your face as you step outside. you wrap your arms around your body, trying to get warmth by hugging yourself. 
you walk to the usual corner where your boyfriend organizes your little meeting. the weather gets colder as you walk to it, you swear it. 
it puts you in a bad mood, you can feel your eyebrow furrowing and a frown forming on your lips. 
there is a fire that lights in your freezing heart when you finally see his face. he leaning on the wall next to him, and he seems to be smiling at your misery. 
“what?” you say, harsher than you initially attended to— it doesn’t seem to bother him. not in the slightest, his smile grows wider. you smile as well, “what?” 
standing straight, he steps closer to you. so close that you have to tilt your head up to see him properly. “nothing,” he shrugs, “jus’ wanted to see you.” 
you don’t answer, just staring at him blankly. although the warmth of his words touches you, you sniff, “‘m cold, hee,” you state. 
the said ‘hee’ laughs, loudly. in a way that makes his adam apple move, in a way that makes you flush, in a way that keeps your eyes on him. 
he steps even closer, your chest gets pressed against his. he wraps his arms around you putting his face in the crook of your neck: 
“i’m sorry, baby,” he whispers, you don’t hug him back. even though you close your eyes. “is it better now?”
you only hum before adding, “i hope no one catches us.”
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JAY
the first thing you feel on your skin is the sunlight peeking through the windows’ blinds. it kisses you slowly out of sleep, welcoming you warmly in the new day. 
the second thing you feel is the gentle pressure around you and the circle of warmth— that is not yours—swallowing you whole. you hide your face further into the body in front of you. 
the arm holds you closer as you hug the body tighter. 
all your senses slowly awoke and you can progressively recognize the scent enveloping your nose. 
it smells like cologne, like a real man, like home, like home, like—
“jay!” you exclaim, jolting awake. the man groans next to you, his arm sliding on your thighs. you tap him, “jay, wake up!”
his deep, sleepy voice emerges from him, “what?” he almost whines. 
“we fell asleep,” you whisper loudly, looking at your barely conscious boyfriend. that should also definitely be anywhere but in your bed. “you are not supposed to be there!”
it looks like it takes a while for him to register, but when he finally does, he almost falls on the floor. 
he gets his shirt back on himself, kisses you quickly and escapes from the window.
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JAKE
he loves when you kiss him. he loves when your soft lips brush his skin and when your mouth rests on his ever so softly. 
and you know it. he tells you always, how much he loves it, hushed and hurriedly between two kisses in the corner— hiding from the public eye. 
this is why you already know, from the look in his eyes weighing on you from right across you, that he wants to kiss you. 
he watches you amongst the crowd of all your mutual friends together and when they all leave, back turned toward you, he stays. 
he holds your waist and, in a sort of instinct, you cup his face. 
you aim for his pretty nose first, then you peck his cheek two times in a row before finally kissing him on the mouth.
“i got to go,” he whispers against your mouth before kissing one more time. 
when you look one last time on his face, you giggle— seeing lipstick strains about everywhere you kissed him. he wears them like tattoos and leaves before you can even tell him anything. 
(he is cheeks blossom with a red hue when his friends tell him about it.) 
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SUNGHOON
you barely survive the entire day with someone grabbing your wrist and pulling you in the tiniest room possible.
surprise doesn’t over take you anymore. you already know why you are here and who you are with. 
your boyfriend’s hand cups your jaw, gently and carefully. he tilts your head up, just a little to be able to lean in a bit and kiss you as your fingers slide in his black thick hair. 
“hi,” he says when he pulls away a tad to tilt his head to the other side. 
he kisses you senseless. loving and passionate like he usually does. his tongue slides in your mouth. you let him lick the inside of it instead of greeting him back.
his free hand hugs your waist, pulling you closer to his body, impossibly so.
your boyfriend is all over you. he takes over your senses and swallows whole. you cannot think of anything else but his hot tongue teasing yours. 
until someone tries to unlock the door and you jump, breaking the kiss and pulling a weird sound out of your lover’s throat.
“did you just bite me?” he hushes and you apologize, eyes still worriedly looking over the door. he chuckles, “i liked that.”
you beat his chest with your fist playfully.
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SUNOO
he swears to you—brags even— whenever he has the chance that he is not a jealous man. 
you almost started to believe it, if it wasn’t for how often he brings it up. almost as if he is trying to gaslight you or desperately trying to convince himself, or rather manifest it. 
and you could even consider it, rethink it when you are on your own. but you can always feel it, see it in his face. 
the heaviness of his gaze whispers the truth to you. whenever you are talking to another man a few feet ahead of him. 
in your peripheral vision, his arms are crossed under his chest. and his teeth are pressed so tight against one another, that his jaw is more defined than ever.
he comes to you as soon as the stranger leaves, “who was that?” he asks, nodding his head towards the leaving man.
you study his frustrated face with an amused look. his eyebrows are furrowed, his mouth is frowned— he looks cute, if you were to be honest. 
you opt for something funnier, “are you jealous?”
he instantly opens his mouth, to defend himself and closes it immediately. 
his sighs, “yes,” he states. shock explodes in your stomach. “i don’t like seeing guys flirt with you,” he leans to whisper the rest in your ear: “when they don’t know you are already taken.” 
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JUGWON
this entire situation seems to be very funny to your—secret—boyfriend.
it is no surprise that he is annoying in private. his fingertips melting in your sides, him tickling you, your skin getting pinched and getting a yelp out of you each time. just because he can.
and just because he can, he does his best to get a reaction out of you in public. 
sometimes, he stares at you from across the room, tilting his head to the side with a grin when your eyes lock. you ignore him each time. 
sometimes, his knuckles brush smoothly and ever so softly against your skin as he passes by you. his touch stings all day long.
today, he aims for a mixture of it. 
“look,” your friend whispers to you, tapping your shoulder to get your attention. her finger is pointed to his direction when you look at her, “he is doing it again.”
your boyfriend is staring at you from across the end of the hall you are walking down. he is walking towards your direction, but you tell your friend to ignore him.
he takes a step to the side as he approaches, exchanging places with his friend to walk next to you. his fingers quickly wrap around yours as your shoulder brushes. 
he holds onto it enough to make your heart skip a beat, but not enough for anyone to see.
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RIKI
his hoodies are way too soft and comfortable for you to not steal. 
he always manages to find the sweetest material. the kind of tissue that his scent soaks into perfectly. a tissue that keeps his warmth days after he wears it. 
you love to be enveloped into that said material. so big and perfectly cozy like the embarrassed he locks you in.
“you want it?” he once asked you. seeing the way you buried your face in his hoodie. you shook your head against his torso, “i insist, sweetheart.”
you didn’t fight against his own wants and you find yourself in it a few days later. the cold wind doesn’t go through it when your coat gives up for a mere second and you hold onto it for dear life.
you bury your nose in it when you miss your lovely boyfriend. his cologne is still impregnated in it— it makes your stomach fill with butterflies.
when you meet each other at his, he comments: “isn’t that my hoodie you are wearing?” your cheeks get pink. “were you really walking around with that on your back?” 
you study his own outfit before answering, “and isn’t that my shirt you are wearing?” you pinch his cheek and he laughs. “i thought you hated pink, mh?”
you taught him well.
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