#just the drawn montage of them growing up together was so effective

[cosmicrhetoric]

finished marineford again moodboard 💀 talk about pyrrhic victories that make YOU want to die

[orionsangel86]

I’ve been thinking a LOT this morning about this comparison that keeps getting drawn between what meta writers are saying now about 15x20 and Destiel and the JohnLock Conspiracy(TM) and aside from just linking you all back to THIS POST by @winchestersingerautorepair which explains it all perfectly anyway, I do feel the need to stress some very clear and very glaringly different points that basically prove outright that this situation is Not That.

1. We already have confirmed Canon Destiel. The romantic feelings are confirmed in text. Destiel is canon. Arguably currently textually unrequited canon (yeah right) but it IS canon. It’s also Word of God canon. Basically, where we currently are is actually more canon than even Aziraphale and Crowley ever were. You can NOT say the same for JohnLock.

2. The JohnLock Conspiracy was all about how the actual final episode of the show was a “fake” bad finale, and how they would release a secret finale which would fix everything and make JohnLock canon a few weeks later. There was zero actual evidence of this anywhere. (Sorry JohnLock shippers, I feel for you I really do, but I just couldn’t ever see any evidence that the secret good finale was ever gonna happen.)

In contrast, we haven’t seen the Supernatural finale yet. It actually is next week. This is FACT. 15x20 is not a figment of Destiel shippers imaginations. We really do have one episode left which hopefully will give us everything we wish for.

3. All of this comparison has come out of meta writers saying 15x19 was written like a finale. We are calling it a finale and that’s why for some reason we are being mocked and compared to the JohnLock conspiracy... but... did those people who mock us not watch 15x19?!? (or at least get a plot summary and watch the final 10 minutes like me).

I can’t speak for my own opinion on the episode being bad, as I haven’t watched it. I have seen reactions both saying it was bad, and others saying it was good, or funny, or “so bad it’s good” but like, whatever. The point is, it WAS a finale. It was the episode that wrapped up the mytharc plot, had a callback montage to brother best moments and had them driving off into the sunset together now they are finally free. Like??? Call it whatever you want, but that was a finale.

Which is WHHHYYYY its SO WEIRD that there is still one episode left. What could POSSIBLY BE OUTSTANDING?

4. So yes. the FACTS are that UNLIKE Sherlock, Supernatural DOES have two finales. This isn’t some conspiracy. It’s a fact. We can joke that 15x19 was the “bronly” finale, but however you wanna see it, that was a finale. 15x20 can only be the long epilogue. The episode that wraps up the entire show. The episode JohnLock shippers dreamed about.

I really don’t mean to rub salt in the wound either. I don’t wanna insult anyone who believed in the conspiracy at the time, because hope is a funny thing that can have devastating effects - believe me, I know. But mocking us and trying to say the two are the same thing is just... wrong.

We don’t know how 15x20 will play out. But we do know the following FACTS:

Chuck is defeated. The big bad is gone.

There are no raised stakes anymore

the brothers are free (textually they confirmed this)

Jack as the new God, has fulfilled Castiel’s prophecy that he would bring about peace and balance to the universe. It’s done.

There is no story left concerning any of these big plot points.

BUT

Castiel is still in the Empty

Sam didn’t reunite with Eileen

Dean hasn’t said a damn thing about Castiel’s textually explicity confession of homosexual love for him

These are literally the ONLY things left to wrap up. There is NO WAY that the finale is going to be just a brothers road trip, growing old together, meeting random women, having kids and saying “Castiel Adam Jack Winchester you are named after the bravest men I know” kind of ending! It would be UNTHINKABLE for Dabb to do that.

I am seriously rubbing my temples on this whole thing because there are still so many naysayers that are pissing me off - particularly certain wannabe SPN writer BBFs who steal meta from Tumblr and pawn it off as their own “journalism” spewing crap all over Twitter about the matter because they have super secret insider knowledge from people who worked on the show that confirmed Misha isn’t back.

Oh Misha’s not back you say? Fuck you. Seriously. Fuck you. Everyone knows he went back to filming. He confirmed it himself over and over again until the CW finally panicked and told him to shut his damn mouth and change his story. These are the same people who have been feeding rumours into fandom for years to misdirect us. The same people who probably convinced KNOWN DESTIEL SHIPPER and SPN writer Meghan Fiztmartin to laugh at, deny, and mock Destiel shippers on Twitter literally only a few weeks before IT WENT CANON. They are doing everything in their power to put us off the scent. They don’t want us to know Cas is back because the ENTIRE ENDING RESTS ON CAS COMING BACK AND IF WE ALL KNEW IT WOULD BE SPOILED. DESTIEL IS THE ENDGAME THEY DON’T WANT SPOILED.

This is not anything like the JohnLock conspiracy because we have actual facts to back it up. We have all the evidence, we have all the logic, the narrative is BEGGING for the love story to be wrapped up. Dean MUST use his words and tell Castiel he loves him. Even the General Audience at this point can see that. So I beg you, stop mocking us for something you don’t know anything about.

If there is ONE THING you should trust right now. It’s the meta writers. We are the ones who have been telling you for YEARS that Destiel is a thing. That there was writer intent. Hell, we even predicted Jack would become God in the end (like seriously anyone with any understanding of literary analysis could see it was going that way). Mocking us after we have already been validated by canon confirmation of the DeanCas romance is just idiotic at this point.

[caveartfair]

7 Zines That Helped People Work through Mental Health Issues

For the uninitiated, a “zine” is often defined as a self-published, small-circulation magazine that documents the happenings of a subculture or a niche topic. But in practice, the art of the zine is governed by “non-rules.” A zine can be consist of 40 pages, or just one. It can be entirely made up of pictures or feature no pictures at all. It can make sense, but it doesn’t have to.

During the 1980s, zine-making often involved taking a pile of collages, poems, essays, images, or doodles; lining them up, just so, over the glass of a Xerox machine; then making copies, and stapling together a series of printed pages like this. Copies might be shared with friends or left in a stack at a local record store. Today, publishing a zine can be as simple as one person creating a web page or as elaborate as a small editorial team collaborating on a printed periodical with a cover star. But the non-rules haven’t changed: If you make it and publish it yourself, and it has text, images, or both, you can probably call it a zine.

Perhaps because of this flexibility, artists and other creatives have found in zines a judgment-free space, and for some, it’s a prime medium for discussing serious, personal issues, like mental health. This point was made late last month when an art exhibition in India, organized by one of Time magazine’s 100 most influential people, Dr. Vikram Patel, illustrated how zines can help break down the stigma surrounding mental health. To explore the topic further, we share below seven examples of such zines, with insights from their creators on how these creative projects helped them navigate their own experiences with mental health.

For Girls Who Cry Often (2016)

Excerpt from Lina Wu, For Girls Who Cry Often, 2016. Courtesy of the artist.

Excerpt from Lina Wu, For Girls Who Cry Often, 2016. Courtesy of the artist.

Lina Wu, a Toronto-based artist and illustrator, collected stories and testimonies from over 20 contributors to create the 40-page zine For Girls Who Cry Often. “It’s a nice feeling to be a part of something bigger,” she said of the collaborative creation process.

For the zine, Wu focused on exploring mental health through a femme lens and let her own experiences inform her process. “For much of my life, I noticed that ‘getting emotional’ was seen as a girly or feminine thing—meaning it is often dismissed as dramatic and frivolous,” she explained.

Wu created a dreamy pink atmosphere to backdrop the contributors’ candid and sometimes dark confessions. The zine’s adolescent tone is a nod to the fanzines of the 1990s that gave teenage girls a voice. In fact, Wu points out that zines are accessible art objects because people can easily share and buy them (readers buying copies of For Girls Who Cry Often are encouraged to pay what they can afford).

An interdisciplinary artist, Wu experiments with poetry, illustrations, comics, photography, and design in her zines. And while she doesn’t bring For Girls Who Cry Often to zine fairs anymore, she noted that making it has helped her grow as an artist.

Fuck This Life (2005–present)

Excerpt from Dave Sander, Fuck This Life, 2018. Courtesy of 8ball Community.

Excerpt from Dave Sander, Fuck This Life, 2018. Courtesy of 8ball Community.

Today, Dave Sander (a.k.a. “Weirdo Dave”) is a visual artist known for collaborations with Vans and Supreme. But back in 2005, Sander was cramming newspaper and magazine clippings into his desk drawer almost out of habit. “After I got a lot,” Sander said, “I thought it would be time to make a zine.”

Flipping through the pages of any issue of Fuck This Life is like witnessing the end-of-life montage people describe after a near-death experience. For Sander, zine-making can be an aggressively cathartic process: “You get to kill shit in your own way,” he offered.

Fuck This Life is a stream-of-consciousness compilation of found imagery—like the mushroom cloud of an atomic bomb or porn stars mid-orgasm—the result of Sander channeling his pain to “create a beautiful, loud, brutal fantasyland.” He refers to the zine ashis deepest, darkest best friend. “It was my reason for living, so I guess it saved me,” he said.

Grief Poems (2017)

Excerpt from Chloe Zelkha, Grief Poems, 2017. Courtesy of the artist.

Excerpt from Chloe Zelkha, Grief Poems, 2017. Courtesy of the artist.

Chloe Zelkha describes her father’s death as a “sudden, heartbreaking shock.” Within months, she’d printed out a collection of poems she found in books or discovered through teachers and grieving groups, then spread them out on her kitchen table. There, the Berkeley-based Zelkha began painting onto the pages, cranking out one after another in succession, without drafting or revising. As she found more poems, she created more pages. The result was Grief Poems, a 26-page exercise in letting go.

Zelkha’s introduction to zines was Project NIA’s The Prison Industrial Complex Is… (2010–11), a straightforward explainer zine with minimal text and simple black-and-white illustrations. She sees zines are an inherently raw medium. “That permission that’s kind of baked into the form,” she said, “is liberating.”

Poems by everyone from Kobayashi Issa to W.S. Merwin are coated in Zelkha’s uninhibited brushstrokes. She compared her process with child’s play or dreaming: “If you watch a kid play on their own for long enough, you’ll see lots of fears, feelings, ideas eeking their way into their game, and then transforming in real time. Or when we dream, and different people, places, concerns visit us in weird ways.”

Identity Crisis (2017)

Librarian–slash–zine-maker Poliana Irizarry is probably better known for their autobiographical black-and-white zines, like My Left Foot (2016) and Training Wheels (2013). But with Identity Crisis, the San Jose–based artist seemed the most vulnerable they’ve ever been. “My abuela suffered many miscarriages at the hands of American doctors, and her surviving offspring also struggle with reproductive issues,” Irizarry wrote. “Many Puerto Ricans do.”

Before the birth control pill was approved by the FDA in 1960, nearly 1,500 Puerto Rican women were unknowingly part of one of the earliest human trials for the pill. Between the 1930s and ’70s, nearly one-third of Puerto Rico’s female population of childbearing age had undergone “the operation,” often without being properly educated on its effects.

Irizarry made Identity Crisis,their first full-color art zine,during a South Bay DIY Zine Collective workshop. Personal and family histories intersect across fragmented pictures of succulents and Southwestern landscapes in a half-prose, half-verse journey through Irizarry’s identity. In just a few pages, Irizarry wrestles with intergenerational trauma and their own post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Irizarry speaks directly to their oppressors, defiant and resolute: “I live in spite of you.”

Shit I Made When I Was Sad (a.k.a. sad zine)(2018)

Excerpt from Shit I Made When I Was Sad a.k.a. sad zine, 2018. Courtesy of Malin Rantzer and Anna Persmark.

Excerpt from Shit I Made When I Was Sad a.k.a. sad zine, 2018. Courtesy of Malin Rantzer and Anna Persmark.

It started when Swedish friends Malin Rantzer and Anna Persmark were showing each other drawings and writing in journals they’d made while they were feeling low. “I noticed that some of the stuff we’d drawn resembled the other’s drawing,” Malin remembered, “and I think at that point we realized we should make a zine about being sad.” Rantzer turned to social media and put out a “swenglish/svengelska” (Swedish-English) call for submissions.

The then–Sweden-based duo (Persmark has since relocated to Portland, Oregon) made sad zine by cutting out and taping or pasting their artworks onto new pages, then scanning them and folding them into a booklet. Persmark sees zine-making as one of the most intimate ways of sharing her feelings; she goes out in person to share copies with her community.

“Even if all the submitters did not know each other,” Malin explained, “they were all friends’ friends or friends’ friends’ friends, and maybe that also can contribute to an atmosphere where it is safe to be vulnerable.” While making the individual works helped them heal, Persmack noted that the process of compiling the zine proved to be revelatory: “Sadness is both intensely personal and universal,” she said.

Sula Collective Issue 3: Mental Health (2015)

Oyinda Yemi-Omowum, An Emotional Response to Colours, 2015. Excerpt from Sula Collective Issue 3: Mental Health, 2015. Courtesy of Sula Collective.

Sula Collective calls itself an online “[maga]zine for and by people of colour.” Initially an exclusively online zine—different from a blog in name and ethos—it reflected its Gen-Y creators and their new ideas of what a zine could be. It’s one of the more visible new zines, among many, with the purpose of turning an online network into an IRL community. Ever since they founded it in 2015, co-creators Kassandra Piñero and Sophia Yuet See knew they wanted to dedicate an issue to mental health.

Sula Collective Issue 3: Mental Health sheds light on how teenagers of color navigate their parents’ more conservative understanding of mental health issues. “We wanted to discuss the things we kept hidden from our parents or couldn’t talk about with friends,” Piñero and Yuet See explained.

The issue was published in November 2015 and serves as a record of how today’s young artists are taking intersectional approaches to dealing with mental health issues. For example, Oyinda, a then–16-year-old Nigerian girl living in London, submitted a color-coded collage of self-portraits and textures called An Emotional Response to Colours. The literary submissions are paired with original artworks, sourced from Sula Collective’ssubmissions inbox, which range from digital art to watercolors. When asked about what makes zines a unique medium, Piñero and Yuet See answered, simply, “control.”

Shrinks: A Retrospective (2018)

Excerpt from Karla Keffer, Shrinks: A Retrospective, 2018. Courtesy of the artist.

Excerpt from Karla Keffer, Shrinks: A Retrospective, 2018. Courtesy of the artist.

Shrinks is part of Karla Keffer’s zine series “The Real Ramona,” where she discusses being diagnosed with and treated for PTSD after almost 30 years in therapy. The Mississippi-based artist found a sense of direction for her work, and Shrinks in particular, through learning about the Satanic Panic of the 1980s.

This phenomenon (which gave daytime television hosts the ratings of their dreams) involved psychologists across America fueling a nationwide hysteria by diagnosing patients with satanic ritual abuse (SRA) and sending them off to tough-love camps.

“Shrinks are human and fallible,” Keffer explained. “I had put a great deal of trust in their infallibility.” In Shrinks, Keffer created profiles of every therapist she’s ever had—like Julie the gaslighter and Jill the racist. Survivors of abuse are often—and paradoxically—burdened with the task of seeing through the abuse and saving themselves. “One of the things I found difficult was sorting out what had happened with each therapist—like, did she/he really say that outlandish thing?” Keffer recalled.

So much of zine-making is about reclaiming—reclaiming the freedom of expression, reclaiming space, reclaiming the past. And, as Keffer put it, “you’ve made your own book, which is not something you experience when you’re writing short stories and sending them to lit mags.” If any one thing can define zines as a medium, it’s the unbridled control it gives artists.

from Artsy News

[movieswithkevin27]

King Arthur: Legend of the Sword

For the first time in his career, Guy Ritchie is likely happy he directed Swept Away because without its existence, King Arthur: Legend of the Sword would have firmly established itself as Ritchie's worst film. Entering in the illustrious pantheon of bad films that bomb after being intended to start a franchise, King Arthur: Legend of the Sword is everything that is wrong about blockbusters today. Cliche and riding the hero's journey too closely, the film's special effects ridden action, frantic cutting (even beyond Ritchie's norm), and awkward injections of "humor" during tense or thrilling moments, the film is a hodge-podge of everything that studios believe audiences want. Unfortunately, as is often the case in these failed franchise starters, it turns out that audiences do not want to watch an incomprehensible, poorly edited, poorly acted, and exceedingly dull film.

The tragic part about King Arthur: Legend of the Sword is that it starts off pretty well. With his castle under attack, King Uther Pendragon (Eric Bana) defends his people by using Excalibur to decisively cut through the invaders' forces and kill their leader. Unfortunately, he did not count on his brother Vortigern (Jude Law) having turned on him. Sacrificing his to become more powerful, Vortigern kills Uther and tries to take Excalibur, but Uther turns into a stone with the sword in his back. Setting up the legend of the sword with his son Arthur drifting off in a boat and being found by a group of women Moses-style, being destined to pull that sword out of him and liberate England from Vortigern. Though he is unwilling and tries to throw away his destiny (the classic cut-and-paste scene of the Lady of the Lake rising with the sword to give it back to Arthur that is in every King Arthur movie apparently), this destiny is not one he can run from unless he is willing to see Britain descend into darkness. Becoming the man who will liberate his people (Moses again), this prophet who is persecuted by the King (Moses again, but also Jesus to some degree) must rise to the occasion via the Hero's Journey to save England. Though cliched to a fault, the story is nonetheless one that can become gripping with Ritchie's occasionally sharp script delivering the fantastical journey and thrills necessary for a King Arthur film.

Unfortunately, shortly after the film's strong opening, things begin to go awry. In other words, Guy Ritchie takes over. Known for his rapid cutting, Ritchie seems to forget he has already cut 15,000 times before unleashing another round of 15,000 shots of Charlie Hunnam's face on the world. Immediately after the credits, he shows Arthur growing up from a young boy to a man with intensive training and odd encounters in his brothel home. Rapidly skimming through time, the headache-inducing sequence tragically sets the tone for a film that puts a premium on rapid cuts and slow-mo action instead of story. So brief, distracting, and inconsequential, this particular montage would have been better if replaced by a "20 years later..." bumper before just cutting to Arthur being a ripped Englishman set to encounter his destiny.

Reliant upon these rapid cuts throughout, Ritchie - as expected - uses it frequently as characters tell a story to somebody who was not there - such as Arthur giving an account of his whereabouts to a police officer with Ritchie flipping through the flashback and the present day with the flashback often matching Charlie Hunnam's every it of dialogue - or to toss in flashbacks and foreshadowing about Arthur's destiny, but where the film truly lacks with this rapid cutting are in action scenes. Rendering them nonsensical and often incomprehensible, Ritchie tries desperately to cover up the poor special effects with this flashy editing style, but it unfortunately has the opposite impact. Instead, these flashy cuts only serve to highlight the often poor special effects that are found in this film, especially as Arthur duels with officers towards the end. Cutting, pausing, slowing things down, and spinning the camera in a circle around the action, Ritchie tries every trick in his arsenal to make the scene look good but does nothing more than confuse and nauseate. Furthermore, it is a clear attempt to manipulate the audience into feeling tension and thrills during the action - especially as Arthur and his friends run from the cops with Ritchie rapidly cutting, using an extreme close-up with a handheld camera, and sprinkling in shaky cam into the scene - as even Ritchie can see that the film is not all that original. Trying to inject originality and beat back claims of predictability with these drawn-out and "stylish" action scenes, Ritchie only manages to further highlight his film's hollow nature. This half-hearted attack at style over substance only serves to prove this as he relies upon it like a crutch to make up for the film's thin writing and run-of-the-mill approach to Arthurian legend.

Perhaps the best example of Ritchie utilizing his rapid cutting technique (if it can even be called a technique) to ill-effect as an attempt to mask the film's largely dull writing comes as the Mage (Astrid Berges-Frisbey) speaks to Sir Bedivere (Djimon Hounsou). Informing Bedivere that Arthur needs to go to the Dark Lands to finally claim power over the sword, Ritchie cuts between that conversation, Bedivere taking Arthur there, and Arthur going through the Dark Lands, in rapid succession. Blending dialogue, finding comedy in Bedivere quickly refusing the Mage only to then be seen taking Arthur there, and always incomprehensible, this flashy diversionary tactic only serves to highlight the script's inadequacy. Clearly unwilling to rest on the tension of the conversation between the Mage and Bedivere and unconvinced that Arthur traversing the Dark Land will be a worthy scene on its own, Ritchie tries to blend them all together in attempt to see if these lame-duck scenes can prop one another up enough to make them work. Unfortunately, three wrongs do not make a right and the thin, dull, and poorly constructed, scenes only combine together to make a horrific montage.

As with many blockbusters in recent times, King Arthur: Legend of the Sword is a film that is unwilling to take risks. Not only is it cliche, poorly edited, and littered with vanilla performances, but it seems unwilling to rest on the atmosphere created by its director. Uncertain in its vision and intent, the film relies on cheap laughs via poorly injected comedic lines to try and prop up the film's appeal. Recognizing that it is not particularly tense or thrilling with a shocking lack of competently put together action scene and set pieces for an action film, the film continuously undermines any attempt at any of those elements via comedy. Though Guy Ritchie successfully blended action, tension, and comedy, into films such as Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels or The Man From UNCLE, he was not as successful here with the comedy continuously falling flat. Overly forced and the by-product of a Frankenstein-esque script that had the fingerprints of too many cooks, the lack of comedic flow, poor delivery from the cast, and the film's inability to maintain consistent emotion throughout any single scene, is perhaps the film's most damning element. Even if Ritchie interjected too much in the editing room with rapid cuts and even if the film is cliche, thrills and strong action are hard to deny as great entertainment. However, with no room to breathe and only half-hearted attempts at either with comedy coming in to stunt both repeatedly, the film is one that consistently feels flat, hollow, and tragically wooden.

It is often in the quiet moments that King Arthur: Legend of the Sword succeeds. Whenever tasked with exuberant moments of bombast, Jude Law falls short as the villainous Vortigern. However, when he sacrifices his wife and, later, his daughter to these demonic mermaid things (I have no idea), Law and the character of Vortigern truly soar. Ominously stepping up to a woman he loves with his whole heart but giving into the greed and lust for power that has entirely consumed his soul, Vortigern feels almost like a tragically evil character but one that is wholly wicked. These chilling, quiet, and sinister, moments as he plunges a sword into them and feels the life slip out of their body are enough to establish him as a worthy villain and show the greatest bit of character development in this film. Willing to stop at nothing to become the ruler of the world, Vortigern is a man who instills fear the second he steps onto the screen, until Law opens his mouth and goes crazy.

By a similar token, this journey is one that is often quite memorable due to great imagery. For one, as the city burns at night with the orange flames pouring out of a tower, Ritchie finds a fantastic image that demonstrates the film's often great beauty. In the scene of Vortigern speaking to the mermaid demons, the female mermaids ominously swimming around him is a similarly terrifically executed scene and one with great beauty as their blue green exteriors swim sinisterly around him in the dark cave. However, perhaps the most stunning sequence comes as the Lady of the Lake restores the sword Excalibur to Arthur. Though featuring much of Ritchie's annoying rapid cutting, there is one scene of the Lady pulling Arthur into the water through a muddy puddle. While perhaps a bit nonsensical, the glowing Lady of the Lake with her dress billowing around her as she pulls the sword and Arthur down into the Lake is a stunning image. Somehow capturing the fantastical sense of wonder in one image, it is this quiet shot that establishes King Arthur: Legend of the Sword as a major missed opportunity. For if Ritchie can create such a beautiful image without any of the frills and excess of the rest of the film, why did he feel the need to obstruct our view of the rest of the film and not just rely on his keen eye for stunning visuals?

Building up to a tension-filled showdown between Arthur and Vortigern with Arthur trying to end his nightmares by killing the man who killed his father, King Arthur: Legend of the Sword ends disappointingly even by its standards. Rapidly cutting through the fight, King Arthur: Legend of the Sword reaches the culmination of its hero's journey with lame plot convenience. Though reliant upon a lot of deus ex machina's throughout the film with Arthur only remembering he has Excalibur when it is convenient and the Mage only occasionally using her powers to help the good guys get out of unwinnable situations, this final convenience is perhaps the lamest. Knocked down by Vortigern, Arthur passes out briefly and sees his father being killed again. However, just as the sword is set to enter his father's back, he grabs it with poor Eric Bana uttering some line about how it is no longer time to run, but instead it is time to fight. Now inspired, he finds power he did not even he had within him. Getting up and decisively beating Voritgern after this rapid development and growth in confidence. Lame, cliche, and entirely convenient, this final growth spurt for Arthur underscores the fact that the film is poorly constructed. Unable to create him as a worthwhile character who grows into his new role over the course of the film, Ritchie is forced to rapidly develop him via yet another flashback that gives him the inspiration and strength to overcome what scares him the most: Vortigern.

A fantasy swashbuckler film, King Arthur: Legend of the Sword is a by-the-number action film that is entirely devoid of soul, purpose, and thrill. Overly-stylized like an image that had the "sharpen" option chosen too many times in Photoshop, the film's poor visuals are met with a hack-kneed attempt at Arthurian legend that hits all the right moments but without any of the feeling or spirit. Toss in a bad, by-the-numbers script that just checks items off the "How to Be a Blockbuster in the 2010s" checklist and the film's issues only compound. Lackluster, bland, or outright poor performances, hardly help matters with the actors trying to force emotion into this story to make up for the script and direction, but failing entirely. A slipshod smorgasbord of how to not make a film or start a franchise, King Arthur: The Legend of the Sword is an expensive disaster.

[theinquisitivej]

‘Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets’ - A Movie Review

For all its impressive visuals and wondrous aesthetics, ‘Valerian’ is an agonisingly boring slog to sit through.

          I will admit to several factors which may have negatively affected my enjoyment of the film. I didn’t see it in 3D. I maintain that most films should be able to stand up just as well no matter how many dimensions they are experienced in, but there are one or two cases where a film was made by its impressive 3D, such as 'Gravity’ or 'Life of Pi’. 'Valerian’ has been praised for its 3D, and there was the occasional sequence that made me think man, this actually would be pretty neat to experience with that extra level of immersion that 3D can grant when correctly implemented. I also haven’t seen 'The Fifth Element’, for which the director of this film, Luc Besson, is best known. Again, that doesn’t mean much - each part of a director’s body of work should ideally be just as rewarding whether they are the first film you’ve experienced from that director, or the twentieth film. Still, there is always going to be that background context that can make a viewing experience more fulfilling when you notice patterns in a director’s style. Also I’m going to be pretty negative in this review, so I want to make every attempt I can to be diplomatic, in case you enjoyed this.

          Where to start with the plot summary? Well, ‘Valerian’ is a sci-fi film based on a comic series. In the film, humanity is part of a galactic alliance between countless species who all live on Alpha, a space station and the titular ‘City of a Thousand Planets’. Valerian is the name of a male human government agent who works alongside Laureline, both his professional and romantic partner. After an entertaining opening montage that showcases several creative alien designs, which is undoubtedly the film’s best feature, we get a sequence where an idyllic planet lives in peace until it is destroyed by a vague apocalypse, and Valerian wakes up from his sleep, having experienced this sequence as a dream. After that, Valerian and Laureline embark on a series of missions and tasks that bring them closer to the truth of what happened to this lost planet and its people.

          Like I said before, the visuals are honestly quite impressive. There is a heaping dose of countless aliens throughout the film, and they vary wildly in their look and design. It’s an excuse for the people making the film to showcase their creativity, and it’s certainly welcome, especially as it aids the film’s theme of striving for unity and co-operation between cultures, even if we are worlds apart. We need more stories preaching that message these days. The CGI will sometimes look a little shaky on a particular creature as it moves around, but for the most part it’s implemented well and helps the filmmakers put together a vast, visibly appealing world.

          Unfortunately, I was only drawn into this world and its characters as far as its surface features, because the story, performances, and explanation of how this world works was terribly dull. Valerian and Laureline are boring lead characters with not much more to their personality aside from making sarcastic remarks with little energy or enthusiasm as they get on with their mission with such professionalism and ease that neither they nor the viewer ever feel any tension or dread towards their dangerous situation. This isn’t helped by the flat performances of Dane DeHaan or Cara Delevingne, whose rigid expressions and tones of voice repel any investment we may develop towards their characters. That’s a major problem, because Valerian and Laureline are clearly our window into this setting that we’re meant to immerse ourselves in. If we can’t sync ourselves up at least a little bit with the characters whose perspective we are intended to share, then it’s going to be very difficult to care about the rest of this world if its foundation is so shaky.

          The pacing is rocky as hell. Looking back on it, I’m pretty sure the only parts of the film that were directly relevant or necessary to the central storyline were in the first half hour and the last twenty minutes. The rest of the plot was a series of meandering detractions that could have been written around or completely lifted out without anything vital having been lost. These diversions are of course there to showcase more about this fictional universe and flesh it out. I can respect the intention, but unlike ‘Mass Effect 2’, this film doesn’t depict its characters or settings in an organic or compelling enough way to justify the bulk of its runtime being dedicated to just that. Information about creatures, species, segments of the city, and more are often just dumped at our feet by disinterested voices. It’s blunt, artless exposition that rarely has any justification for being explicitly stated beyond the director wanting to share all the really cool stuff about this world with the audience. But so little of it has any bearing on the rest of the plot, making it difficult to care about retaining any of the wondrous facts about this universe. It’s like a bad history lesson where facts are blandly read out and go through one ear and out the other.

          ‘Valerian’s characters, story, and the weak development of its fictional setting are its main problems, but beyond a pleasant enough aesthetic, it is also poorly presented to the audience. The film tends to rush through things, whether its exposition or shots in an action sequence. The occasional sweeping camera pan or extended shot as Valerian runs through a series of creative locales is an effective demonstration of the film’s creative setting, as well as its 3D technology. But apart from these moments, ‘Valerian’ doesn’t take the proper time to let you drink in each element as its introduced to you. Think of how comparatively managed the first ‘Guardians of the Galaxy’ is with the number of locales it introduces, and how it takes its time setting up exactly what you need to know about each and every setting. Here, meanwhile, you can practically hear Luc Besson saying “come on come on, quick dilly-dallying, there’s so much more for me to show you!” So yes, I did see a lot of content in this film, but I remember hardly any of it because we spent very little time on anything.

          All this might be excusable if the pleasing visuals were strung together by a decent musical score. ‘Tron: Legacy’ and the Star Wars prequels have somewhat interesting visuals that are marred by lacklustre stories, but the soundtrack for all of them is astonishing and keeps me going every time I watch them. Alexandre Desplat’s score for ‘Valerian’ is serviceable enough, but it’s all exactly what you’d expect. Nothing stands out, so I couldn’t even begin to tell you what the distinctive sound for this movie is. ‘Valerian’ has some strong designs under the surface for its world and its inhabitants, but it fails to frame it in a competent enough way for it to be memorable in the slightest.

          I was so very bored throughout the majority of ‘Valerian’, wishing I could just find some way to connect with it. It’s bright, colourful, creative, and celebrates unity, so I want it to succeed. But its unengaging performances, everything-but-the-kitchen-sink creative approach, awkward pacing, weak musical score, and terrible main characters drag it way down. Apart from its intended message and impressive visuals, I have nothing to recommend about this movie.

3/10.

Sitting through ‘Valerian’ is like listening to a friend awkwardly meander through the thousand things they love about their favourite sci-fi book series. You’re happy they’re so passionate about it, and you’re sure there’s something solid beneath the endless waffle, but your mind is growing number by the second as you keep checking your watch.

[recentanimenews]

Carole & Tuesday – 12 – Setting the Stage to Stardom

As a dejected Carole tells Gus and Roddy what just happened, Tuesday is briefly scolded by her mother upon returning to her mansion. Her mom couldn’t give to shits about her beyond how her actions reflect on her, and she basically says as much before locking her daughter in her room for a week.

You’d think for a politician worried about the scandal of a runaway daughter, subjecting that daughter to solitary confinement might not be the best look! Anyway, what follows is an effective montage of the two girls suddenly ripped apart becoming more and more morose. They are both The Loneliest Girl all over again.

Gus, who had a similar falling-out with a loved one that in hindsight he believes he could have salvaged, offers some sage advice to Carole about not letting things fester too long without making amends. Carole, eating her feelings in the form of a double Whopper, is way ahead of him: She needs Tues, and she thinks Tues needs her. Gus agrees, which means it’s time to plan the rescue mission—which, yes, may technically involve kidnapping!

Meanwhile, Tuesday’s only non-robot visitor is Spencer, who is as supportive as Gus about getting the duo back together, and letting his sister pursue her dreams. He reveals to her he saw her in the club, and while he admits he never thought his sis was capable of running away to the big city or getting into music, he can relate (having once pursued music but gave up, likely under pressure from mom).

I like Spencer. He’s a good brother! He didn’t give in to their domineering mother when it mattered most. Mom’s too self-involved and distracted by politics and toy boys to realize her hold on him is not as strong as she thinks. And while he couldn’t make it, he can tell she’s got what it takes, and so will do everything to free her from her gilded prison.

That night—the night before the finals, as Carole, Gus, Roddy take the train to Tuesday’s district—Angela is at the Artience Lab with Tao, asking him why the AI lyrics seem to be almost reading her mind. His answer is that, well, the lab itself has been reading her mind all along, as well as her body. It’s been listening and watching and writing, and perhaps even drawn out words from her subconscious she’d never be able to draw out alone.

In this regard, Angela is not a solo act, despite appearing alone on stage. Tao is her collaborator, since he’s the one who developed the AI. After getting into singing to please Dahlia, she can’t sing the final song to her Mama, so she asks Tao to indulge her and look at her and only her throughout the performance.

Tao agrees, but only this once. Like Carole and Tuesday, there’s nothing overtly or explicitly romantic in play here, but it’s also not like there’s nothing there.

The next morning, the rescue attempt, in which Spencer aids Carole, Gus and Roddy without even knowing it by unlocing her door and holding back a security robot so she can run away in her very inappropriate-for-running fancy shoes. They also catch a bit of luck when a driver in a car that’s faster than the cops recognizes them and offers them a ride to the station.

Gus and Roddy are arrested, but the mission is complete: Carole & Tuesday are on their way to their destiny. On the train, Carole apologizes to Tues for the things she said, and the two make it clear to each other that they want nothing more than to by each other’s side. Carole also finally manages to give Tues her birthday gift: a shiny acoustic guitar pin.

When the two return to Alba City, the grandeur of the first episode in which Tuesday arrives for the first time returns, only now she’s not alone and unknown, but running hand-in-hand with her new bestie as the throngs of people recognize and cheer them on. The only problem is, they’re very late; the season finale of Mars Brightest has already started, and as promised, Tao is in the back of the hall, his gaze locked on Angela.

Angie takes that gaze and runs with it, turning in another lovely performance. The vocals are good, but as usual I’m just not that impressed with the lyrics. She sings two identical verses without any change, which makes me wonder, are they that deep and sophisticated as to make Angela believe the AI was reading her mind? I don’t know, but as usual I have to grade on a curve and for this show, it’s a damn good song, well performed.

The judges agree, and are ready to crown Angela a winner until the sudden belated appearance of Carole & Tuesday. Catherine whips out the rulebook and states that any performers not present at the start of the show will be disqualified. Despite this, Carole, Tuesday, Benito, the crowd, and even Angela all compel her to allow them to perform anyway.

Since they had no time to write or practice a new song, they go with their very first song, Loneliest Girl, the song that marked the beginning of their friendship, the end of their loneliness, made them a viral sensation (thanks to Roddy) and put them on the road to musical greatness.

While we’ve heard the song a few times throughout the series, it’s never been performed so powerfully as this time, and with both this and Angela’s finals performance, Mars Brightest finally sounds and feels like a genuine reality TV competition, breaking through the walls of mere imitation.

That’s carried forward with the deliberation of the judges afterwards. Even DJ Ertegun is moved to tears! Catherine initially holds her “rules are rules” ground, but allows an exception that satisfies everyone from the crowd, to Angela (who wanted a fair-and-square fight) to Gus and Roddy (still stuck in jail): Angela is the official winner, but both acts will be permitted to make their pro debuts.

They earned it, and Angela is cordial in congratulating them. She, Carole and Tuesday have come a long way, and many challenges remain. Will their continued chilly rivalry curdle into outright hostility? Will Cybelle break out of prison and finish what she started? Will Tues’ mom take harsher measures, despite the blowback from the duo’s growing legion of fans? We’ll find out in the second half of the series. I’ll be on board!

By: sesameacrylic

[lukasczdt016-blog]

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[zionozuj101-blog]

Great photo editor or edit an image software

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