#just so you know i googled so many pranks for this as i have neither gone this far with pranks nor had someone prank me like this

[tabbbbyyyy]

CAT FIC TIME

FULL DISCLOSURE THIS IS NOT A SHIP FIC ITS ALL PLATONIC PEOPLE CAN JUST BE FRIENDS OK.

And yes, I know this is too long with too many line breaks it just happens sometimes.

Dude I litteraly had to Google what conners nickname for Mother Goose was for this I forgot it🥲

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In retrospect, this was a fucking stupid idea. Let a drunk Mother Goose into the prank spell book collection when she still held a grudge against Xanthous for stealing the last slice of Brystals chocolate cake. Although, to be fair, it was very nice cake and in her drunken mind, this meant war.

I should probably clarify that it was Christmas eve and therefore a perfectly normal day to get absolutely wasted and bake cakes.

She giggled to herself as she scanned down the page she had chosen. It said that it was a spell to turn an unsuspecting bypasser to turn into an animal, whatever best represented them, for about 15 minutes. It was simple, just a phrase spoken aloud would do the trick, However, it warned that it was to be casted while sober and clear minded as if the pronunciation of complicated spells is done wrong, it would be corrupted and therefore be unpredictable in who it affected and for how long. Lucy completely ignored this passage as if it was invisible and instead chose to cast it anyways as, as Lucy slurred to herself,

"I dunno, mabye it'll make that idiot like green or something"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Said "idiot" was currently sitting on a rug in the living room calmly sipping his coffee as he chatted to Emerelda about the new book they had both read. They both happened to be of the opinion that it was unequivocally shite. Can't win everything they supposed. Shame though.

They were oblivious to the footsteps plodding down the main staircase. Mother Goose hid a giggle behind her hand as she paused before the bend in the staircase hiding her from view.

"Sure im was well into middle age", thought Mother Goose "but can't a gal have some fun?" And with that she jumped out from the stairs and yelled the incantation while pointing at Xanthous, butchering the pronunciation so bad it would probably kill the man who had written the spell book in the first place( if it wasn't for the fact that he had already died about four decades ago).

Neither Xanthous nor Emerelda had time to form a measured response to this or even enough to turn around before a bright flash of light hit both of them, something Lucy hazily registered as Bad. A loud bang sounded, then a short fizzle that died away as the light did revealing.. nothing? Lucy glanced around in mild panic(only mild, she was still rather angry about the cake and not completely thinking straight) the experience sobering her up enough to realise that looking around at head height for animals wasn't very smart given that not many animals were quite tall enough for that. Slowly, with a sense of trepidation, Mother Goose looked down to the carpet on which stood two cats both blinking up at her with shock. One was a light ginger Maine Coon with darker patterns akin to flames across its back and startlingly yellow eyes. The other was of indeterminate breed but had deep grey (almost black) fur, and bright green eyes. It had an almost greenish undertone to its fur.

"Ohhh shit" Mother Goose gulped.

"Mrrp?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Conner and Alex, who had just returned from the Otherworld, had quite the suprise when walking into the living room. Namely, the suprise of seeing an old lady perched on the back of a sofa trying to reason with two very disgruntled looking cats.

"Hey... it was just a little spell, that's all.. it'll wear off in a bit?" Lucy reasoned as she put her hands up in mock surrender.

"Mother Goose?"

"O.M.G!"

Lucy whipped her head around at the noise, a mix of relief and amusement painted on her face.

"Hiya kiddos", she grinned nervously "dont suppose y'all could help me out?"

"Uh, Mother Goose, what the hell are you doing?" Conner asked tilting his head and scrunching up his nose in confusion.

"Well," Lucy started", I may have cast a little spell..."

The black cat hissed at Mother Goose as its fur shimmered, akin to a gemstone or stained glass. The ginger one growled and the ends of its fur caught aflame, glowing bright in the dull light of the candelabras placed around the room.

"Oh." Said Alex in understanding "you turned Emerelda and Xanthous into cats, didn't you Mother Goose."

"I ..well..." she sighed "yes."

The cats both turned to face the twins, took in the situation, and dulled their respective powers. Now that they were placated a bit due to the twins presences and their need to stay professional, the twins had time to actually look at the cats. Yep, definitely Xanthous and Emerelda. Fuck.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The rest of the council had appeared in twos and threes from their respective corners of the Palace. Mother Goose sheepishly filled them in of the situation at hand. They came to the agreement that it was best to just wait it out (then laugh at the two fairies afterwards but that part was left mainly unspoken). They all stayed in the living room however, to "drink into Christmas" as Tangerina put it (Par the twins who were too young to drink of course)

After this, said cats had strolled off to Emerelda's bedroom, due to its comforting feel. They sat side by side on the bed, curled up but not asleep. Waiting wasn't either of their strong suits and they were both anxious to get back to being fairies so they could kic- I mean calmly berate Lucy. It was odd, being a cat. Too much fur. And the embarrassing urge to purr contentedly when you're curled up on a soft bed. Xanthous listened to the chatting downstairs, his feline ears pricking up and flames crackling quietly as he absentmindedly eavesdropped on the conversation going on downstairs, whilst not really taking in any information. Emerelda ignored the voices her improved hearing picked up and tried her best to rest without accidentally falling asleep.

A bang.

Simultaneously, both cats shot up from the bed, ears pinned back in distress, instantly on alert. Perhaps from cat instincts, perhaps from previous experience with loud mysterious bangs. It's hard to tell, really. Their fur stood on end, making them look rather like electrocuted raccoons. They looked at each other in shared fear. What the fuck would be making those noises this late at night? Then it struck them and their eyes widened in sync with each other.

Fireworks.

Of course, it was Christmas eve. Shit.

A few more erratic bangs sounded. It didn't matter that they knew what they were, they were still deafening due to the new ears. Xanthous whimpered quietly, slinking backwards as his flames peaked and trying to make himself shrink to as small as possible. Emerelda's tail whipped back and forth as she too stepped back, instinctively moving in closer to Xanthous, knowing he never liked this kind of thing even as a fairy. Xanthous welcomed this with relief and curled in close to Emerelda as they both flopped back down on the mattress. Their paws intertwined as they curled up in a pile, both seeking out the comfort of their oldest friend. Or one of them at least. They hunkered down and waited for the worst to pass, closing their eyes and keeping their ears pinned back.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The council and the twins were watching the fireworks out of the living room window with interest. It was a rather beautiful display, although some was covered by trees. All in all, a satisfying display.

Something was nagging at Skylene though. She felt as if she was forgetting something. Was something missing perhaps? Was someone missing? Well Xanthous and Emerelda weren't here but they had disappeared because they had been pissed.... because they had had a spell put on them.... because they were... cats.. with cat ears... when there was fireworks...

Oh shit. That can't be good.

"What about Emerelda and Xanthous?!" She blurted out suddenly.

"What about them, Xanny and Em are just upstairs" dismissed Mother Goose, waving around a glass of wine with reckless abandon.

"Fireworks have to be awful for them, being cats and all." Argued Skylene.

"Oh," Lucy said, the effect of her spell just dawning on her,"whoops"

The rest of the council and the twins, attention dragged away from the fireworks, frowned disapprovingly (well except for coral who can do no wrong).

"Ight fine, jeez yall are harsh," muttered Lucy,"I'll go check on them, make sure they haven't like, exploded or anything"

Tangerina sighed and rolled her eyes. Skylene raised an incredulous eyebrow. The rest of the room turned back to the fireworks one by one, the situation was dealt with.

Mother Goose slowly lugged herself up the stairs. It not that she didn't feel bad for turning them into cats, she did, but why does every one of her pranks always have to end up wrong? It was supposed to be only Xanthous, and it was well past 15 minutes by now.

"Should've read the bloody small print" she muttered to herself as she rounded the top of the curved staircase and set off along the corridor. She tried Xanthouses room first, with no luck. Her heart rate sped up. As much as she said she hated the council, she couldn't truly deny that she didn't care. She knew that Xanthous would hate the fireworks, and even more as a cat. She tried Emerelda's next, at least she should be there right? As she peered into the room, she had to slam a hand over her face to hide a rather un-Mother-Goose-like squeal.

Emerelda was here, but tangled up in a ball of fur with Xanthous. Xanthouses fire was out, and he was asleep but purring gently. Emerelda was drowsy, but cracked open one green eye to stare disapprovingly at Lucy. Her fur shimmered threateningly as to show Mother Goose that she still had her magic, then, perceiving no threat, she closed her eye and curled back into Xanthouses fur. Lucy still had a hand over her mouth muffling what had now turned to incredulous laughter.

"Holy shit," she thought," but why are they so calm about me seeing this?" She pondered this for less than a second, before making the decision that, yeah that's really not that odd, everyone here is clingy as shit. She watched them for a second more, hand now hiding a small smile, and listened to their conteded purring. "See! Sometimes I do useful shit!"thought Lucy triumphantly, ignoring the fact that it was a complete accident on her part.

And with that, Mother Goose walked out, closed the door softly, and strolled back down to the living room. The fireworks stopped seconds later and the others turned away from the main window.

"Are they OK?" Asked Alex, brow furrowing in worry.

"Yeah," said Lucy, remnants of a smile still gracing her features," they don't seem very worried about it". She sat down on the sofa and picked up her glass of wine, squinted at it and then,

"Yeah let's get something stronger, ima go grab the whiskey, you wanna have the rest of this shit Conner?"

"NO-"

"LUCY-"

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What I imagine Xanthous and Emerelda as looking like in this

Thx for reading yall, sorry this took so long. Also yea after this Lucy gets the shit beaten out of her(not pictured).

If yall spot any grammar errors or shit pls tell me this was not beta'd.

[moralina]

Season of the Witch | JJ Maybank x reader

Prompts: “It’s Halloween; everyone’s entitled to one good scare.” and “Shh, I’m Googling sex spells.”

It's for @ijustreallylovethem 's Halloween writing challenge!

*english is not my first language

A/n: I loved writing for this challenge! I hope i did an okay job lol

Warnings: swearing and a quick mention of blood and bones, it also stopped making sense halfway through lol

Wc: 1.9k

You weren't supposed to be here.

Last night Kiara invited you to the Halloween party some people from the cut were throwing, it was going to be at an abandoned house and according to Kiara, everyone was going. You told her you couldn't because you had a history test that week and your parents wouldn't let you out.

You were lying. You just didn't want to come. Usually, you enjoyed parties, even if it was just to sit there and watch everyone have fun, having the pogues to talk was enough. But lately, you've been exhausted. You had to search for a job to help your parents at home, and you haven't had a good night of sleep since.

Not to mention you weren't the biggest Halloween fan. You enjoyed the candies and decorated houses. However, horror movies were not your thing, neither were the pranks JJ liked to pull on you during halloween week.

When you said you weren't coming, Kiara went in search of your weakness. JJ. He could ask you anything and you'd happily oblige. It was that annoying smile on his face that you loved so much. How could you say no to that?

Now, here you were. Freezing because you thought your pumpkin sweater would be enough - apparently, it wasn't - and almost sleeping on the old - and dusty - couch.

"Y/n Y/n Y/n!" JJ came running your way "you need to see this!" he grabbed your hand, attempting to pull you from the couch. you didn't move "come on!" he exclaimed, jumping in front of you.

"what is it I need to see?"

"if you get your lazy ass up I'll show you." You rolled your eyes but stood up to follow him.

Maybe it'd bring some fun to this tedious night.

You both made your way through the crowd. Everyone was wearing some type of costume, even if it was just a simple devil's horn, but you were impressed with the people who went all out and came with complete costumes.

Moments ago a guy with a bee costume tried to hit on you. It worked as good entertainment for a few minutes.

JJ on the other hand wasn't wearing a costume, I mean, he said he came as John B, but it didn't count, he only threw one of jb's shirts on.

You weren't wearing a costume either.

"where are we going JJ?" you whined

"wait..." you passed through some people hooking up on a very very old table, you scrunched up your face, but kept walking "here"

He stopped in front of a door. It was painted red and brought a bad feeling, making chills run up your spine.

"what's in there?" you quietly asked

"the basement" he made an oooh sound and you eyed him questionably.

"I'm not going in there"

"yes, you are"

"no, no I'm not" you hated basements, and on a Halloween night? even more. you've watched - because JJ made you - too many horror movies to know that that's how you die.

Once, as a kid, you got trapped in your aunt's basement. It was a hot summer day and your cousins decided to play hide and seek. You were the youngest and they rarely invited you to play so when they asked you immediately said yes.

You ended up locked in the dark basement for three hours until an adult got home.

Now, when you think back to that day, you can't believe how innocent you were.

"C'mon, y/n/n!" he whined while grabbing your left arm and shaking it. You stood still "you're no fun, you know that?"

"yep" you popped the p.

JJ did his famous puppy dog eyes.

"Jesus" you rolled your eyes "why do you want me to go down there huh?"

"I already told you."

"No, you did not."

"Just- come with me and you'll see."

"Is this some kind of prank?" You eye him suspiciously.

"No, babe, I swear to god!" He tugged on your arm "c'mon!"

"Okay okay" a satisfied smile on his face.

"Don't worry, I'll protect you." He smirked.

"You better." You replied, patting his left shoulder, waiting patiently as he slowly opened the door. "What're you doing?"

"Suspense" he whispered moving his free hand randomly in the air, fully opening the door.

Going down the stairs was a nightmare for you. Were you really becoming one of the stupid characters that go towards the danger?

"Tadah" JJ said after turning the light on, his arms opened and a smile on his face.

"What am I supposed to see here?" You questioned, looking around.

"How blind are you?" He said before holding both sides of your face in his hands and turning your head towards the far corner of the room.

Your eyes wined before you spoke, "what the hell is that?"

"Probably a..." he paused "satanic ritual happened here" he whispered in your ear, making you roll your eyes again, although deep inside your soul was shaking in fear.

"Ha. Ha. Super funny, J." you scrunched up your nose "I know you put that in there"

"No, I did not" he feigned offense.

"So who did it?"

He took a second to think "a witch!" He exclaimed.

You weren't going to say it out loud but it freaked you out.

You cautiously eyed the weird stuff on the ground. Some bones, probably fake - at least you hope so - a creepy doll with buttons on its eyes - he most definitely got that idea from Coraline, the movie you watched together and was enough to make you unable to sleep alone for a whole week.

It was so obvious just JJ trying to scare you, only the rational part of your brain wasn't working properly.

Inside your head, your brain was screaming for you to run.

You're not the bravest person. A shadow is enough to scare you. And JJ knew that, that's why you won't tell him you're scared. That's probably what he wants. His Halloween prank wouldn't work.

Not this time.

Suddenly, the lights went off and the door shut closed, causing you to let out the loudest scream of your life.

"JJ! JJ this is not funny!" you closed your eyes and didn't dare move an inch, scared you might trip into a monster.

Of course, it wouldn't happen, still, it's not like you can think clearly right now. Your thoughts were running wild and you felt like crying, there was enough stress in your life already.

You should've stayed home.

"Boo!" and you screamed again, jumping and then tripping on your feet, stumbling back and going straight to the floor.

And then, you heard JJ laughing.

"you're an asshole!" you heard him walk somewhere, a couple of seconds of silence, apart from JJ trying to hold his laugh, and finally, the lights were on again.

"Oh c'mon! It's Halloween, everyone is entitled to one good scare," he smirked.

You were still on the floor, giving him a death glare "by the end of tonight you'll be girlfriendless."

"what?! But I didn't do anything wrong!" he moved his hand to his chest feigning innocence.

Your face contorted into one of annoyance but, it soon went away. feigning nonchalance, you stood up, turning your back to JJ and going towards the stairs, far away from your boyfriend and the weird witch stuff.

"Watch your back, Maybank." You said in the most threatening way possible. JJ only scoffed, a smirk still evident on his lips.

You made your way up the stairs, wanting to get out of there as soon as possible, however, it didn't happen.

The door was locked.

"Open the door." You demanded

"I don't have the keys"

"You what?"

"I. Don't. Have-"

"Okay okay, I get it" you sighed "tell JB or Pope or whoever you got into this stupid prank to open the door" he only shrugged his shoulders. On any other day, you and JJ would be all over each other, unfortunately, your mood wasn't the best right now, so it wouldn't happen.

"Don't know what you're talking about." You huffed, annoyed at your boyfriend. He knew you weren't in the Halloween spirit, and he still went on with this.

You turned around, back facing the door, both your hands in your hips and you eyed JJ deep in his soul.

A staring contest.

You were the best at it. You and JJ had a rule, the moment one of you disagreed on something or got into a stupid argument and were tired of arguing you'd start a staring contest. Obviously, you only did it in not serious situations.

It was almost two minutes and your eyes were burning, this time you were going to lose, and JJ noticed how you were struggling to keep your eyes open, smirking with satisfaction.

You looked down at his lips and blinked

"AHA you lost!" JJ screamed in victory, his smile super big on his face. You also grinned, not being able to hold your annoyed face for too long. JJ was just too good at making you smile, his smile being enough to change your whole mood. You rolled your eyes at it, still smiling.

Fuck this boy and his cute smile.

"I love you sweets but, you lost." His hands in the air "and I won." A silence set itself around the room "Maybe we could...?" he gazed at the couch.

"Nope" you answered, knowing exactly what he was implying.

"Please?!" He pouted

"No" you shook your head

"Why not?" He whined

"Keep talking and I'll cut your tong off"

"You won't, you love my tong too much." he winked and you tried to hold your laugh back to no avail.

"Shut up." you waved him off, still unable to hide the obvious grin.

After a while in silence - you still on the stairs and JJ lying on the couch - you see JJ pull something out of his pocket.

Taking a better glance at it, you realized it was his phone.

"What?" JJ jumped at your loud voice "you had your phone the whole time?!"

"Yeah"

You angrily stood up and went towards him, trying to snatch the phone from his hands, he quickly turned around, keeping his phone between him and the couch.

You began to scratch and pull his arm, but he wasn't faltering.

"JJ," you said lowly "JJ JJ JJ JJ JJ-" he only hummed. "JJ, please! Call someone."

"Can't," he shook his head "there's no signal here." His face still on his phone and his body covering what he was doing. "Weird right?"

"Lie!" You exclaimed, "I saw you using google." You pointed at his phone, he rolled his eyes "what were you doing?"

“I was Googling sex spells.” you gave him a straight face "What? Want to make something out of this so unexpected situation," he said, smirking.

"J, call someone."

"You're no fun"

"yeah yeah, you already said that" you smiled softly "now will you please call someone, baby?" You attempted once again, doing the sweetest voice you could.

"I'm not sure..."

"Then I won't give you the surprise I had planned for tonight... after the party"

"Kie!" He yelled, running towards the stairs "You can open the door now."

Before you could get to the door he put himself in your way. His lips on a pout and asked

"Forgive with a kiss?"

"I'll think about that, Maybank." You patted his shoulder, finally making your way out of the basement.

A/n: I love JJ, and like I have good ideas for him, I just don't know how to execute them well lol anyways, hope it was worth the read :) if you enjoyed please consider leaving a like and reblogging 💙

[we-pay-for-everything]

thoughts on will, freya, tyr seward, daegal, gilli, mithian and elena??

theyre my favourite extras i love them andnjdjsjdj

Hi!!! Thank you so much for heeding my call, haha. I'm afraid I was too arrogant though. I haven't even finished watching the show for the first time. I decided to pause it mid-season 5 for... reasons - aka, I'm too scared to continue.

I'll have to google some of those names, because I'm not good with them.

Mithian - I don't know if she appears in another season 5 episode, but she is very lovely. She's someone who would make a good Queen, but not as much as Gwen. She was similar to Gwen in many ways, and that was done on purpose; it would've been easier for Arthur to reject someone with a terrible personality or a bad attitude, like Lady Vivian, but not someone as perfect as Mithian. She was beautiful, smart, observant, kind - she noticed Merlin's influence over Arthur, spoke to him like an equal, and defended him from Arthur's "pranks". She was like Gwen in that regard. However, compared to Gwen, she wasn't as bold, outspoken, or brave - she wouldn't have made a better Queen than Gwen. But I liked Mithian! She had a sense of humor and was easy-going too!

Freya - She's a weird one. Is she Merlin's great love? He never showed interest in anyone else, he was even willing to run away with her. They were a bit like Lancelot and Gwen - first loves, a whirlwind romance. Neither couple is convincing to me. It felt too much like destiny, in the way of love at first sight. Freya was pretty lovely though, and it was sad seeing her die in Merlin's arms, especially since she knew who he was and accepted him completely. She had such a tragic life... Finding peace in death is very depressing. It was nice what he did for her, and what she did for him later. I liked her and them, but I don't have any strong feelings for either.

Elena - Elena is my favorite of all these characters! I liked how awkward, clumsy and unlady like she was, though she became a proper princess once she was no longer a changeling. She too was a good match for Arthur - but only as a princess. She didn't appear to be very wise, ambitious, or Queen material - but, who knows? Uther was never interested in a Queen who'd help Arthur lead Camelot, but that is what Arthur wanted, and only Gwen fit the part. Sorry if I'm comparing them to Gwen, but that was kind of their purpose in the story. To me, Gwen is just as important as Arthur, because if he is the Once and Future King, Gwen is the Once and Future Queen who ruled over Camelot when Arthur died and continued his legacy (and much more). Anyway, Elena was lovely. She was pretty and sweet and cute. I loved how she replied to Arthur when he opposed their marriage - her voice was so soft and shy, but she was so eloquent. She was quite like Arthur - no mom, wanting to please her dad, kind of awkward and lonely. However, unlike Arthur, her father loved her and was good to her, and that made all the difference. She didn't have his responsibilities either...

Now, I'll google the rest lmao.

Will - I'll be honest, I didn't pay much attention to the first season. I was still trying to get into the show, and my attention span sucks. I remember him very vaguely. I need to rewatch the show from the beginning and this time pay attention to everything. I remember he didn't like Arthur and had a quarrel with Merlin? I'm sure he was brave and wonderful though.

Gilli - I know who he is now that I've seen his face! He was an interesting one. I could understand why he refused to leave Camelot and why he considered Merlin a traitor of his kind. Although I feel for Merlin, it is true that Merlin stood by Uther and Arthur against his "people". He believed the only way to restore magic to the Kingdom was through non-magic users which is kind of problematic, and so he put up with Uther. I honestly thought it was a bit lame that Gilli backed down and agreed with Merlin in the end. His fury was righteous and bowing down to his oppressors, because Merlin always knows better is bullshit. I actually disliked that episode. Merlin's argument that magic must only be used for good is utter nonsense. It's like Merlin has been brainwashed into only using magic in favor of those who disprove of it. Gilli was wrong to kill a man and enter a stupid tournament, and also to endanger himself just to prove a point, but magic isn't meant to be used for good. That's like saying people are born only to do good - we are allowed to do things for our own sake. I don't have to become a doctor because I must only do good, and doctors aren't necessarily doing it to save lives - although most jobs are necessary, I can also choose to do something with little value for society. Merlin was kind of gatekeeping magic. I think he was scared of it. But, although magic can be used for evil, fearing it and walking away from it doesn't help anyone. I disliked how cowardly the show is. It's endgame is to make Camelot safe for magic users, yet only Merlin is allowed to use magic - everyone else is a villain or morally ambiguous.

Anyway, Gilli was fine. I didn't care for him, but I felt for him.

Daegal - Sorry, I haven't watched the episode he's in yet! Once I do, I'll edit this post!

Tyr Seward - Same as above!!! I'm really scared of the evil Gwen arc! Gwen's my favorite character and Arwen is my only OTP on the show.

Thank you so much for the ask! I don't know the show that well, so I think I got ahead of myself requesting asks. When you get an ask, it's usually because people consider you an expert on the subject. Since I'm no expert, I feel like anything I say will be inadequate! But thanks so much! Why do you love these characters?

[starlightshadowsworld]

YGO Protagonists

Atem:

*Oldest brother... Literal dad

*Is very protective over the rest of them

*Seriously don't touch a hair on their heads because you will lose your soul.

*He totally has Kaiba on Speed dial and calls him over the dumbest things to get a rise out of him (but they are friendly?( Seto would also murder you dead if you hurt these munchkins he just won't admit it... (I will not apologise for this)

*Does not understand memes (mee mee's?) but tells dad puns for days.

*Always gives compliments and gives great life/dueling advice to the rest (puts a hand on their shoulders with that knowing and proud look).

*Will spend hours bragging about how far Judai's come, how smart and talented Yusei and Yusaku, how Yuya and Yuga created original dualing rules, how Yugi is awesome. He will tell anyone and everyone (they all secretly love it)

Yugi Mouto:

*Younger older brother? (identical twins but younger of the two)

*Super optimistic, always there to lend a hand and is very pacifistic... but will throw hands if the situation requires and without hesitation.

*Has Kaibaman in his deck to spite Kaiba (it works every time)

*HE SHARPENS HIS HAIR!

*Yes it can pierce a wall... It was for science.

*Usually the one to help escalate the chaos, and than pretends to have no idea why the house is upside down... And on fire... And the fire is green.

*Is the only one other than Atem to get Yusei to go to sleep.

*He loves puzzles, telling riddles and leaving little clues around the house for the others to solve (and they always get a present even if they get it wrong because they tried.)

*Doesn't see anything wrong with his fashion sense.

Judai Yuki:

*Problem child 1, needs a hug

*Memelord, will constantly troll Atem with movie references, and anything he can think of. (Yes he does quote the star wars prequels during duals.)

*Yubel makes sure he's looking after himself and has woven their way into the family. They and Astral have fun conversations. (Pharaoh the cat gets on very well with Atem... Werid.)

*Either he's happy, outgoing and herding the younger kids into various pranks. Rounding up Yuya, Yuma, Yuga and Yugi into his antics, (we don't speak of the Eggwitch incident). Sometimes he manages to drag Yusaku in to join them, giving them all a part to play and praising their efforts (they haven't been caught)

*OR he's depressed, haunted and full of guilt. He finds comfort by spending time with the others, hating being on his own. Everyone even those fairly reserved pick up on his mood and direct him to different tasks. Especially with Yuya, both of them can talk for hours about what ifs, shoulds and shouldn'ts.

*Favourite non dualing activity is helping Yusei to bake, he has burned many a cookie but he loves icing cakes.

*Very protective, will tap into the power of the Supreme King and Yubels abilities sometimes as unconsciously when one of the others are upset, or he's pushed into a corner.

Yusei Fudo:

*Oldest after the twins, literal mum

*Can't take care of himself to save his life but cares deeply for the others. Packing them lunches, helping them with school work etc.

*Takes Yusaku under his wing as soon as he sees his tech skills, both of them stay up for hours working on projects until Yugi scolds them at 4 am.

*Always half asleep, covered in oil and holding a cup of coffee (no he doesn't have a problem.) He mumbles codes and always seems to fall asleep holding a wrench.

*Usually he's accompanied by Yuga or Yusaku, either sitting and asking questions about their projects or working on a shared on/Yusaku's own stuff. He doesn't like working alone so it works out.

*Can do the "Mum look" and it has stopped the Supreme King, Dark Zexal and Zarc in their tracks.

*Card games on Motorcycles...having his bike borrowed by the little ones who want to play a card game on a bike but aren't old enough or know how to drive.

*Likes to bake, learned from Martha to give the others birthday treats and finds it fun.

*Claims he can never get sick... Liar.

Yusaku Fujiki

*Problem child 2 (all problem children need hugs and therapy, Kaiba get your wallet)

*Tried to stay closed off from the others but finds he enjoys their company and their antics.

*He has a Metapod hoodie that Yuya won at a carnival and gifted him. He wears it all the time, its cosy.

*Pretty Awkward, very cold sometimes without meaning it but somehow there all able to understand what he means without getting upset or offended.

*He spends hours working on projects with Yusei, neither talk much and it's a comfortable silence. Yuga often accompanies them, full of questions and joy and he enjoys sharing his work.

*Prefers to watch the others dual than to dual himself, absorbing the strategies and while he doesn't quite understand their motives... He finds himself smiling at Yuya's shows, wondering what he means with his smiling routine.

*Offhandedly told Kaiba that he fixed some holes in his security system. Kaiba went on a firing spree (yes with his firing people coat) and his was promptly hired. He actually enjoys it, and is now Kaiba's favourite brat.

*Also... The missing persons list is growing after Yusaku finally opened up about his past.... Werid.

Yuya Sakaki

*Problem child 3 (see above)

*Smiles go for miles

*Finds a lot of comfort from the others. The first time he let slip about Zarc, Judai was right there with his glowing green/orange eyes and they bonded instantly.

*He tries to only dual for entertainment and fun but that can't always be the case, though it really rattles him up afterwards. Do not make him mad in a dual if you value your life.

*Plays a lot with Yuma and Yuga, as the oldest of the trio he tries to set an example... He never said it was a good one....hes part of Zarc.

*He always has a game, an idea and the others will always be his faithful audience. He's made real solid dualing into an art, Atem and Judai have made his monsters real at times without the need for the tech (it was beautiful)

*Starts the appreciate Dragons Fanclub with Yusei and Kaiba.

*Yes to capes (Sorry Edna)

*Fusion dimension isn't available at the moment... Or the forceable future.

Yuma Tsukumo

*Second youngest, space boy

*Atem gives him advice and praises every one of his duals even he loses, teaching him that every one can be used as a step towards success.

*Astral befriends Yubel, and often makes remarks at the Zarc fragments, he and Yuuri get on the others nerve.

*He spends most of his time with Yuya and Yuga, either dualing, watching Yuya dualtain or pranking. He started their lengendary prank war against Judai and Yugi...(Yusei was out of the house for a week and Atem gave up). It was a battle for the ages.

*He does worry at times that he's so behind the others skill's levels but as he gets closer to them it matters less. He cheers on every one of them, bragging about how cool they are.

*He takes up other hobbies, baking, cooking, and dragging everyone into family game nights. Which all end fine and do not result in a pissed of Zarc threathing Wario before kicking his switch out of a window... Nope absolutely not.

*Has a constellation book.

*Likes using big words he doesn't know the meaning off. And than trying and failing to convince everyone he knows exactly what he just said without googling it... While Astral facepalms, definitely picked it up from Yusei.

Yuga Ohda

*Tiny baby

*Yugi picked him up once and everyone starting to sing "it's the circle of life."

*He loves watching Yusei and Yasuke work, because they answer his questions properly and look at his inventions with respect and a critical but kind eye. They slowly teach him his to improve and it shows in his work.

*All of them were interested in his Rush duals and listen to him explain, finding it interesting and another new way to play.

*Yuya teaches him how to dualtain, both of them putting on hippo-tastic shows for their friends and loved ones. Fulfilling their goals to have fun.

*He steals everyone's hoodies and jackets, doesn't care how big they are he will steal them and wear them. And look adorable despite his argument that he isn't.

*Everyone is the most protective of him as he's the youngest and while he's touched, he's super protective over them and offers himself as a cuddle buddy whenever anyone has nightmares.

And there all one big crazy family

[bitchapalooza]

Hetalia actor AU(yes, inspired by the BNHA actor AU specifically)

• Alfred and Matthew are irl twins that got their start in acting as children. They both at first tried out for the roles of Northern and Southern Italy but they were seen to be better fits for the North American brothers. That and their Italian accents were not the best. No one cared they have an Italian uncle. Literally no one asked them. In fact their bad accents prompted the casting list to go more international faster than it already was. They both look exactly the same without the addition of the cowlick or ahoge so it's pretty good Matthew grew his hair out for this role. Otherwise they'd constantly have to correct everyone like they used to in the other shows they worked on.

• Arthur thought he was auditioning for the newest James Bond movie but turns out his agent tricked him. Arthur ended up liking it however and stayed. He managed to drag his son Peter in to audition for the role of Sealand, as Peter wanted to get into acting in something bigger than school plays. His character may be annoyed by his son's character but irl you can catch Arthur being a loving and caring father. Peter however is embarrassed to be around him, just as many kids are to their parents. Arthur is much more relaxed than the character he plays. And Peter isn't as annoying as Sealand is. He's actually always on his phone or doing homework when not working.

• Francis did not know a lick of English when he auditioned. He went into this blind. And yet he got the part after staying up 3 nights in a row beforehand listening to the Google translated script(from English to French and back) to memorize it that way. Presently he may be on par with a 10 year old's basic knowledge of English but that doesn't stop him from frequently speaking only French on set when no one else but Yao and half the writing staff understand him. He even only does his interviews in French because WHY put effort into a second language??? Y'all he's the epitome of lazy.

• Ivan is the prankster on set. He teams up with Kiku, Basch, Peter, Alfred, and Mathias very frequently to prank everyone else in the cast. He also purposefully messes up his lines when his character is being creepy. He'll say the weirdest shit while in the most intense scenes. During the magical pipe of pain scene, Ivan caused almost 20 retakes because he kept making bad innuendos causing everyone to lose their shit. He's the exact opposite of his character.

• Roderich really is a former pianist and former child actor coming back to acting because gosh he missed it. He's actually SUPER irresponsible with his money despite the character he plays. The first paycheck from the show he spent on a bulk of 200 rubber ducks just so he could set them up in his bedroom on his and his wife's 3rd anniversary. All for a chuckle. And to get a use out of them. That was an impulse buy. And he does not regret it. The scenes where Austria is playing the piano really is Roderich playing it, and he asks there to be almost no sound editing to those takes whatsoever. He's extremely forgetful so the staff has resorted to sticky noting his lines into the scene then green screening it out later. He's a good actor but someone help this man's poor memory.

• Timo basically already was Finland before ever auditioning. His friends already called him the dad of their group to begin with. He's a sweet guy and he bakes cookies and other sweets the night before just to bring them in to the set the next morning for not just the cast but the entire film crew too; he has two ovens for this and really knows how to speed bake. He just wants to make sure everyone's morning is as good as his own is. He's just a darling. Everyone is glad Berwald recommended Timo for the part of Finland and even happier that he got the role.

• Gilbert is a brunette with brown eyes irl so no one recognizes him without the white wig or red contacts. Fans meet him and are like "You remind me of that Prussia guy from Hetalia! You'd make a great cosplay of him!" and he just accepts it every time by this point. Every convention he goes to, every interview he does he is in costume. At least he isn't constantly bombarded by fans like Ludwig or Ivan are.

• Feliciano is a very mature and professional guy despite the bubbly and goofy character he plays. Feliciano does have his relaxed and fun moments though, learning to let go from his time acting as North Italy. He's a really pleasant guy to be friends with but it can be a little tough to break through his shell. He's kind of shy, different from North Italy's friendly nature.

• Lovino is a nice guy. He's kind but not super kind, but also not an asshole. He does a lot a Instagram live streams after episode recordings, mostly of him hanging out with the other actors. He and Feliciano get along well but Lovino tends to hang around Ludwig more because he feels so bad for how he screams at him and insults him on set, even though its purely for the show. He apologizes immediately after filming is finished.

• Ludwig is pretty orderly but he isn't exactly mature. He's the one to recite bad jokes and puns to everyone, his favorites being dad jokes. No one likes this. At all. He's a fun loving guy that everyone can get along with. He has fun acting. He's very grateful Gilbert pointed him in the direction of the auditions.

• Kiku is glad his very first acting gig will probably be one of his most successful and popular. He's freshly graduated from college and completely chaotic. He's got a degree in business he's never going to use. He collects weird Japanese products as well as gifting them to his coworkers every Christmas without fail. He once walked into Ivan's trailer and tossed a whole bag of hard boiled eggs at him and ran off. The eggs all had individual faces drawn onto them. Ivan still does not know why he did this and he's honestly too afraid to ask at this point.

• The actor for Chibitalia also plays chibi Romano! His name is Emilio and he's Lovino's nephew. Emilio is a sweetie that pretty much stole everyone's heart. He loves working on the show, especially when he gets to curse and not get in trouble for it.

• Holy Roman Empire's actor was originally a kid who had no prior experience in acting neither had he really been near a camera before. He ended up freezing up his first day. He was recasted by Ludwig's son Otto, especially since Otto had been around a film set dozens of times before. The dad jokes really escalated once Otto was brought on set....

This is all I'm going to do for now without the post getting too long. Plus I'm tired and have a headache. But I really wanted to get this out lol I spent 3 hours figuring this all out with a really bad glaucoma headache please at least appreciate this for my eyes' sake lmao

[artzychic27]

Heart Thief

Before arriving at Dupont, Marc went to Vadim Bastille Collège and lived the life of those high school princesses you see in teen movies (Minus all of the drama, backstabbing, and the occasional bursting into song). He was liked by everyone including the teachers, he was president of the writing, fanfiction, and GSA club, had an amazing group of friends, and best of all, an amazing boyfriend.

Lucien Rebois was the most sought after boy at school. Tall, tan, captain of the fútbol team and took every team he was on to victory, super popular, charming, and the nicest guy you’ll ever meet. What more could a person want in a boyfriend? Girls would always try to ask him out, but he turned every single one of them down, even the most popular girls at school. Everyone wondered why until the day of the championship game when everything came to light

Marc and his friends cheered their school’s team on as they made the winning goal. While the crowd was still in a frenzy, Lucien grabbed a microphone and quieted everyone down when he said that he had to make an announcement…

“… Gimme an ‘M’!”, he shouted into the mic, forming an M with his arms. The crowd complied and mirrored him, while Marc and his friends just looked at each other in confusion

“M!”

“Gimme an ‘A’!”

“A!”

“Gimme an ‘R’!”

“R!”

Mehdi, a Cuban boy with brown hair dyed pink, and Vice President of the GSA squealed when he realized what Lucien was spelling, “He’s gonna say C!”. Syd, a a Vietnamese student nodded in agreement

Marc sputtered, “W-what?! No! He’s not!”

“Wait for it, Mar-Mar.”, Madelyn, a stocky Creole girl with a half-shaved head told him

“Gimme a ‘C’!”

“C!”

She smirked, “I knew it!”

“What does that spell?!”, Lucien asked as he pointed to the crowd. From where he stood, Marc blushed when he realized that Lucien had spelled his name

“Marc!”, the students shouted, a few looked at Marc grinning. He was sure this had to be a prank.

“Come on! Lemme hear you!”, he encouraged

“MARC!”, The students shouted again. Even a few teachers joined in. Lucien’s eyes never left the green-eyed boy, neither did the smile on his face as he spoke to him like they were the only people on the field

“I love you, Marc Anciel. Did I mention that?”, Marc smiles when he realized that the most popular boy in school was being sincere, and he truly felt this way about him. On the field, Marc could hear a few of the cheerleaders screaming with envy, knowing Lucien was gay and off the market. They ran away in tears

Lucien pointed towards the band, “Gimme a beat!”

“Un, deus, trois, quatre!”

Marc couldn’t believe this was happening. It was like something out of a fairytale. He looked around to see if this was real, and it was. When Lucien sang a love song about how he would give everything up for just one kiss, when he threw his jersey into the crowd, and Marc caught it, when he crowd-surfed over to him, and when he asked him to the dance… It was all real...

—

They were the cutest couple at school. They went on amazing dates, and went as a couple to every school event. Lucien even tried to switch classes so he could be closer to Marc, which the writer and other students found so sweet. Lucien has to be the best boyfriend ever. Generous, considerate, loyal, protective…

...A little too protective, though. Dating Lucien meant having the fútbol team on your side. When he heard about some homophobic student messing with Marc, Lucien sent the entire team to “take care of him”. No one’s seen that student in a while.

Lucien was also kind of clingy. Marc can’t remember the last time he’s hung out with his friends; he was always going on at least twenty dates with Lucien. Then one day, the students gave Marc a new nickname, ‘Lucien’s pet’, after he was given a red choker necklace with a silver heart dangling on a small chain, and on the heart was ‘L.R.’ He would always treat Marc like his property, but did it in a slow subtly way: Having his hands on Marc at all times, slowly separating him from his friends, then at one point, trying to dictate what he wore.

Madelyn was finally able to get some alone time with Marc and told him all about toxic relationships. And those examples sounded exactly like the situation he was in right now.

With some encouragement from his friends, Marc was finally found the courage to break up with Lucien after eight long months, and everything was back to normal. Marc didn’t have someone constantly following him around and keeping him away from his friends or threatening innocent students. Even when Lucien tried to get him back, he stood strong and didn’t give in. He almost did when Lucien swore he would be better, but when Marc caught him threatening the exchange student from Hong Kong who he thought had a crush on Marc, he had enough.

After explaining everything to his moms, they decided that it would be best if Marc switched schools to avoid Lucien. He was hesitant at first, knowing that he would have to leave all of his friends behind, but it was worth it to not have to deal with Lucien anymore. So, he said his goodbyes, made the Vice Presidents of the clubs the new presidents, and left, ready to start a new life at a new school

Lucien wouldn’t give up, though. He vowed that he would find Marc, and make him his again by any means necessary.

—

“Class, we have a new student!”, Mme. Bustier announced in her usual cheerful tone. A few of the students rolled their eyes and groaned at the mention of a new student, worried this one may be like Lila, “Please meet Lucien Rebois.”

Kim and Alix perked up at the mention of the name and nearly fell out of their seats when the athlete walked into the room. The other students, while not huge fans like Kim and Alix, gasped when they saw him

“Hi, nice to meet you all.”, he greeted with a smile

“Dude! You’re a legend!”, Kim shouted, “My cousin took me to every game you played, you are awesome!”

Lucien tried not to blush at the praise, “Well, I guess I was okay.”

“Okay?!”, Alix exclaimed, “You gotta join our fútbol team, we suck!”

“Alix!”, Bustier reprimanded and Lucien chuckled, “That’s quite enough.”

“I’ll think about it.”, he looked around, “So, where do I sit?”

Mme. Bustier pointed up the stairs, “Right next to Nathaniel.”, said boy waved so Lucien could see him. He walked up the stairs, paying no mind to the many admiring looks he was receiving, and sat down next to the redhead. The two sent each other polite smiles and focused on Bustier’s lecture

—

While doing classwork, Nathaniel’s eyes wandered to the bracelet wrapped around Lucien’s wrist. It was red, made of leather, and had a silver heart. It didn’t seem weird at first until he saw his seat mate’s initials on the heart. ‘Wonder who gave that to him.’, he thought, then went back to his classwork, only to be disrupted by the sound of the bell

“Okay, everyone, I’ll see you all after lunch.”, Mme. Bustier said as the students walked out of the classroom

While packing his messenger bag, Nathaniel dropped a draft of the Ladybug comic and went to pick it up, but Lucien beat him to it and looked at it in awe, “Dude, you make the Ladybug comics? I love these!”, he grinned

Nathaniel smiles at the compliment, “Thanks. I-I don’t make the whole comic though-“ He was cut off by Alix, running up the stairs and wrapping an arm around him, “He draws, and his partner writes.”

“Alix.”, he groaned, to which the pink-haired girl replied with a grin

“Partner as is significant other?”, Lucien asked when he realized what Alix meant. When he saw Nathaniel looking away in embarrassment and with what looked like fear, he eased his worries by saying, “Don’t worry, man, I’m like, super gay.”

Nathaniel smiled, relief taking over. Alix’s smile widened when she heard those words and she immediately wrapped her other arm around Lucien, “I love this boy!”

And the three of them left the classroom

—

Later at lunch, Lucien has drawn in a crowd as he talked a little about himself. Even Marinette joined in when she realized this new student was nothing like Lila and didn’t go on and on bragging about himself, or claiming he did something outlandish that could be proven false with a quick and easy Google search

“Well, I‘ve been captain of the fútbol team since middle school, and I’ll be honest, I was not ready to lead a whole team.”

Marinette whispered to Alya, “I like how modest he is.”, the Creole girl nodded in agreement

“Yeah, not like she who will not be named.”, Alya said with a roll of her eyes, then asked, “So Lucien, I hope you don’t mind going off-topic, but what do you think of Ladybug and Chat Noir?”

“They’re amazing!”, he exclaimed, “I mean, I’ve never seen them in person, only on the Ladyblog live-streams. My school was a little far from the action.”, he explained while Alya beamed at the mention of her blog, “Now, what’s this I’ve heard about ‘Ladybug’s best friend?’”

The students groaned. Marinette said, “We don’t talk about her.”

“Alright, enough about Rossi,” Nino bitterly said, then pointed to the bracelet resting on his wrist, “sweet band, man! Where’d you find that?”, the others admired the bracelet and repeated Nino’s question

Nathaniel noticed him blushing at the mention of it, “Well… It was my ex’s.” He raised an eyebrow, ‘His ex’s? Then why does it have his initials?’, he thought to himself then continued to listen

“Yeah, I gave him this after we dated for three months.”, he explained, “I, um… I’m not entirely over him yet.”, he admitted, making the girls and some boys awe, “Then he switched schools, and I haven’t really been the same.”

“That’s why you were playing sloppy at your games!”, Kim exclaimed, “Man, that must’ve been rough. If Ondine broke up with me, I’d probably be drowning in the pool.”, everyone laughed. Nathaniel then looked up and saw Marc walking in the cafeteria with Mireille. He smiled at how content and happy he looked, but then that feeling turned to concern when he saw him running away the minute he walked in

Nathaniel, wanting to make sure Marc was okay, excused himself, then ran after him. He heard footsteps, whirled around, and saw Mireille running towards him, “Is Marc okay?”, she asked, only to have Nathaniel respond with a shrug, “I don’t know. Help me look for him.”

“Damn long legs.”, Mireille cursed under her breath

--

“Anciel!”

Marc whipped around from the bathroom mirror and came face-to-face... Well, more like chest-to-face with Ismael Prisk, the school’s foreign exchange students from Pakistan, Marc’s classmate, and what some of the anime-fanatic students call a ‘tsundere’.

Marc sighed, “Ismael, I’m not in the mood.”

“Fight with your boyfriend?”, he asked in a snarky tone, making Marc roll his eyes at the boy’s usual behavior

“No! I-I just...”

Ismael continued to pry, “Because you always spend lunch with him, considering the fact that you two have no classes together, so I’m just naturally curious as to why you’d rather hide in the bathroom than use that precious hour to make out with him.”

‘Yeah right.’, Marc thought, “It has nothing to do with Nathaniel.”

The short brunette smirked, “Well, then I guess you won’t mind if I go fetch him, now would you?”, he heads for the door, only to be stopped when Marc grabs his wrist

“Don’t do that!”, he begged

“I won’t say anything if you tell me why you’re acting like a freak.”. he retorted while snatching his wrist out of Marc’s grasp

“... Okay...”, seeing Ismael backing towards the door, he quickly said, “It’s Lucien, okay?!”

“The new guy?”, Marc nodded, “Tall guy, captain of some team?”, he asked, and Marc nodded again, “So what?”

“... He’s my ex.”, Ismael made an ‘o’ shape with his mouth, “And, I just don’t feel like running into him.”

“So you’re the guy who made him lose those games.”, Ismael taunted

“It wasn’t my fault!”, Marc exclaimed. Ismael flinched at his outburst, “I had to break up with him! He was just... I couldn’t take it! He was sweet at first, but he started treating me like I was his property or something! He even had me wear a choker with his initials on it!”

The stoic look on Ismael’s face became softer as he listened to Marc about Lucien

“He even threatened some of my friends, o-or anyone who talked to me because he thought they were flirting with me.”, a tear streamed down his face, “One guy even went to the hospital.”

Ismael asked, “Did you tell anyone?”

“I tried to go to the principal, but he said without any proof, there wasn’t anything that could’ve be done.”, he explained, “And Lucien always thought ahead. He did his threatening in rooms that didn’t have cameras, had the fútbol team backing him up if he was ever accused of something, and his aunt is a member of the school board, so he always got away with everything.”

Ismael frowned, “Damn, that’s... That’s just awful.”

Marc nodded, “I finally broke up with him, and I switched schools. But now that Lucien’s here, I’m worried he’ll do something to Nath when he finds out we’re dating. So that’s why you can’t say anything!”

“Dude, Lucien’s gonna find out you go here sooner or later.”, Ismael said with a shake of his head, “You just gotta avoid him, and hope he turns out like Rossi.” He smiled at the thought of Lila rotting away in her prison cell

Marc shuddered at the memory of how he almost killed Lila. But putting that thought aside, he realized Ismael was right. Lila slipped up and got arrested, so maybe Lucien will too and get what he had coming a long time ago, “I guess... Thanks-”

Ismael cut him off and headed for the door, “Don’t mention it. To anyone.”, and he left

—

Mireille walked out of the library, “Well, he’s not in there.”, she turns to Nathaniel who’s walking out of a classroom, “No luck?”

He shook his head, “No. I’m getting worried; why did he just run off like that?”

“Ask him yourself.”, Mireille narrowed her eyes as the boy approached her and Nathaniel

“What are you talking about, Ismael?”, she asked curtly, “Where’s Marc?”

The brunette ignored her and turned to Nathaniel, “Kurtzberg, I suggest you stay by your boyfriend’s side at all times, especially now that Lucien’s here.”, he warned

“What?”

Ismael held his hands up, sensing the rising hostility in the redhead’s voice, “He told me a couple of things about Rebois. Things that might concern you.”

“Well what did he say? What did Lucien do?”, he asked, wanting to get right to the point, but the other boy merely shook his head

“Like I said: ask him yourself.”, he answered with a pointed look before walking away from the two very confused students

“I’ll talk to him at art club.”, Nathaniel told Mireille before heading back to the cafeteria

—

“So, Nath,”, Lucien sat down in his seat, “I was just wondering, who’s your partner with the Ladybug comic?”, he asked, making Nathaniel tense.

Should he say anything? If what Ismael said was true, then Lucien may hurt Marc. He needed to keep quiet until he has enough information on this guy to know if Marc is safe around him

“Well, he prefers privacy.” he answered, “He doesn’t really like all of the attention.”, it wasn’t really a lie. Marc hated being the center of attention, yet he’s the writer for the most popular comic in Paris

“Huh.”, was Lucien’s response before he turned his attention to the teacher

‘...Okay.’

Throughout the lesson, Nathaniel felt like he was being watched, like someone was plotting to set him on fire. Maybe he was just being paranoid because he was worried about Marc... Yeah, that was it. No one’s out to get him, and he did not just see Lucien glaring at him as if he were Hawkmoth himself

—

Lucien knew what he saw, and he knew what he heard. He knew he saw the silky black hair of his love in the hallway, the bright red hoodie that hid his beautiful frame, and the gentle green eyes that made his heart melt...

He found him. After all this time, he found Marc Anciel. And he had the Ladyblog to thank for that. Even as a monochromatic supervillain who could reverse people, he still looked breath-taking. When he watched the live-stream, he instantly recognized the beautiful Akuma, and insisted on switching schools so he could find him. And who would’ve guessed that they’d end up in the same school again? It was fate, they were meant to stay together.

But then he heard Nathaniel Kurtzberg being referred to as Marc’s boyfriend... That nobody stole Marc away from him: The school golden boy, the one people would kill to date. Well, he was going to get him back. They had art club together, probably to work on the comic. How did he not recognize Marc as the writer? The word choice, the realistic dialogue... Just another thing Lucien loved about him

When that bell rings at the end of the day, Marc will be his again.

—

“You alright, Nath?”, Kim asked Nathaniel as he shut his locker closed and slipped on his swim cap, “You seem a little on edge.”

He shrugged, “... It’s Lucien.”

The Vietnamese boy smiled dreamily at the mention of the name, “Yeah, he’s awesome,” but then frowned, “What about him?”

“Well, I heard some stuff about him.”, he answered as he placed a book in his locker, “And it involved Marc.”, Kim raised an eyebrow, “Ismael told me to keep Marc away from him.”

“Ismael Prisk?”, he nodded, “You actually believe that guy? He’s not exactly the nicest guy, Nath. Plus, Lucien’s chill, he wouldn’t do anything to hurt Marc... Not like Lila.”

The artist rolled his eyes at the mention of the Italian, and Kim’s face contorted into disgust

“I can’t believe I thought she was telling the truth.”, Kim said, ashamed, “I get injured all the time, and I come back with bruises and casts. She falls down the stairs and somehow comes back without a singer scratch.”

“Well, I’ll admit, she was pretty convincing.”, Nathaniel admitted with a look of embarrassment, “She almost had me convinced, but then she said she was dating the creator of the Ladybug comic.”

Kim facepalms, “God, me and the others are so dumb.”

Nathaniel chuckled, then shut his locker, “Well, I’m gonna go and see if Marc’s alright.”

“I bet my lucky speedo that Lucien is a good guy!”

Nathaniel yelled back as he walked out the room, “You can keep those!”

—

Meanwhile, in the art room, Marc was listening to music on his headphones and writing in his journal as he waited for Nathaniel to arrive. He needed to relax after the day he’s been having- He’s managed to avoid Lucien, so that’s good... Now he just had to keep doing so until graduation.

This was one of the places where he was safe. Lucien was never really into the arts, so there was no way he’d ever actually come in here

“Lucien, hi!”, Marc heard Rose greet as the song he was listening to faded out. He dropped his pencil in horror

‘Oh, God.’

“So, an athlete, and an artist?”, Alix let out a low whistle, “I’m liking you more and more, man.”

‘They’re all in the same class, of course, they’re friends.’

“Well, not really.”, he responded with a laugh then looked around the room, “I just came to check the place out. I’m liking the calm vibe here.”

Juleka shrugged as she strummed a few chords on her guitar, “It is pretty quiet here sometimes.”

‘Okay, they’re distracting him. Maybe if I sneak out quietly, he won’t notice me.’, Marc slowly gathered his notebook and pencils in his bag, not wanting to make too much noise

“Marc! Have you met Lucien?!”, Rose asked, and at that moment, Marc wanted to die

“...”

When he didn’t move, Juleka raised an eyebrow, “Marc, are you okay?”

Before he could respond, Marc felt a strong hand being placed on his shoulder and heard, “Hello, my Emerald.”, the pet name that made him want to throw up

“Who’s Emerald?”, Alix asked

Lucien feigned surprise and answered, “Oh, did Marc not tell you?”, he holds up his wrist with the choker acting as a bracelet, “We were boyfriends. I call him Emerald because of his lovely eyes.”

Alix, Rose, and Juleka weren’t sure how to respond to that. Do they ask follow-up questions, tell him to leave before Nathaniel arrives, or just kick him out right now because he’s getting a little too close to Marc?

“Okay, okay!”, Alix approaches the two and removes Lucien’s hand from Marc’s arm, “Reunion’s over, you should go try out for a team, Marc has a boyfriend,” she points to the door, “you can leave now.”

“What’s the rush?”, Lucien asked as he placed his hands on Marc’s shoulders and gave them a little squeeze, making the writer shudder, “Can’t a guy just talk to his ex without someone trying to make him leave?” He gives the sleeve of Marc’s jacket a little tug, grinning when it slides off his shoulder a little bit

“I don’t hear you talking to each other.”, Alix spat

He huffed, “Fine.”, then turns to Marc, “Emerald, I haven’t stopped thinking about you ever since took our break.”

Marc mumbled, “We broke up.”

“And I want you back.”, he leaned in close to the petrified boy and made escaping impossible. He had Marc pinned against the table, with his arms on either side of him, “Come on, Emerald. Let’s finish where we-“, he didn’t finish as he was pushed away from Marc by none other than Alix

“You have five, fucking, seconds.”, she snarled

Lucien smirked, “Well, I better make the most of it.”, he sent Marc a wink, only infuriating Alix even more.

—

As he made his way towards the art room, Nathaniel’s phone started buzzing. He checked the texts, all caps, and angry emojis

Alix: GET IN HERE BEFORE I SNAP HIS NECK!😡😡😡

Rose: HURRY! ALIX IS GONNA RIP HIS HEAD OFF! 😱

Alix: FHE)3&HE D#%UWUDK WH3$&

Juleka: Alix used her phone to smack him. Also, I think Marc’s having a panic attack!!

At that last text, Nathaniel ran as fast as he could. When he made it to the classroom, his eyes widened at the scene before him- Alix had Lucien in a headlock while Rose tries to pry her off, and Juleka had her arms wrapped around Marc as he sat on the floor

“What the hell is going on?!”, he yelled, grabbing everyone’s attention, except for Marc’s. Juleka helped Marc up and walked him over to his boyfriend. Nathaniel cupped his cheeks in his hands, “It’s okay, Rainbow. I’m here.”, he took one of his shaky hands and kissed it, “It’s okay.”

”Get your hands off of him!”, Lucien snarled, making Marc tighten his arms around Nathaniel, and hide his face in the crook of his neck

Alix jabbed his chest with her finger, “He’s having a panic attack, you dick!”

Nathaniel was suddenly pulled out of Marc’s hold, and the writer pulled his hood over his head, shaking and sobbing as the two boys yelled at each other

“Get out of here!”

“Make me, twerp!”

Marc feels a hand on his shoulder. He holds it, thinking it’s Nathaniel, Alix, Juleka, or Rose. When he looks up and paled when he realized it was Lucien

“Get your hands off of him!”, Rose screamed as Juleka stormed over and yanked the boy away from Marc

“Emerald, you’re going to let them-“

“DON’T CALL ME THAT!”, he sobbed

“Get out of here, Rebois.”, Nathaniel growled

“Over my dead- OW!”

Alix had twisted his arm behind his back and is walking him towards the door, “And stay out!”, she pushed him out, then shut the door. Once Lucien regained his composure, he looked around and saw a couple of students giving confused looks and whispering. He stormed off in a huff.

—

“The owner of heart once so full of life only to have it be torn apart, then shattered, and now seeking to take back what was his.”, Hawkmoth holds out his hand, and a white butterfly lands in his open palm. He covers the butterfly, and it’s engulfed with dark magic, turning the butterfly into an Akuma. It flutters away

“Fly, my little Akuma. And evilize him!”

—

Lucien sat outside on the steps of the school, scrolling through photos on his phone, all are of him and Marc when they were dating- Them holding hands while roller-skating, Marc wearing his letterman jacket at a fútbol game, dancing at the spring formal, kissing in his car at a drive-in... They looked so happy... He shoved his phone back in his pocket and rubbed his thumb over the choker necklace wrapped around his wrist. While doing this, he felt something brush up against his finger, and suddenly, he felt as if someone was in his head

“Heart Thief, I am Hawkmoth. I too understand the pain of losing someone you love. Now you can take back what’s yours. In return, you must give me Ladybug and Chat Noir’s Miraculous.”

Lucien wanted to say no. He’s seen what this guy was capable of, but... He’d have Marc all to himself again. This was too good of an opportunity to pass up. He had to get him back and away from those friends of his. Especially that red-haired twerp...

“I’m coming for you, Marc.”, he smirked as the black mist bubbled up from the choker and surrounded him

Hawkmoth froze when he heard that name. ‘Marc Anciel’ How could such an innocent-sounding name sound so malevolent? He, a mere child managed to silence and overpower him, the most feared villain in all of Paris, and then had the nerve to threaten him... It was quite impressive. Marc was now second on his ‘Must Akumatize’ list, and at the top was Marinette. Even though Lila had been arrested and was no longer a threat to her emotional stability, the Eurasian girl would still make a powerful Akuma- Not one caused by her friends betraying, but definitely, something that would make the heroes fall to their knees

—

“It’s okay, Rainbow. He’s gone.”, Nathaniel whispered as he had his arms wrapped around Marc’s frame, “He won’t hurt you, okay?”

“God! I can’t believe I actually looked up to that guy!”, Alix screeched, “When I see him, I’m just gonna... I’ll...”, she chucks a spray paint can at the door, M. Haberkorn walks in carrying a few blank canvases just as the can drops to the floor with a ‘clank’. “What’s going on here?”, he asked with concern when he felt the tension in the room

Alix sighed, “Sorry, M. Haberkorn. We just... Ugh.”, she slumped into her seat

The art teacher looks and sees Marc in Nathaniel’s protective hold, “Is Marc okay?”

Juleka answers, “We had a run-in with the new student.”

Rose adds, “Yeah, and he was making Marc really uncomfortable! He kept touching him and calling him Em-“, seeing Nathaniel shake his head, she rephrased, “a name that he didn’t like. And he was, I guess flirting with Marc even when we said he and Nathaniel were dating!”

M. Haberkorn frowned. How dare another student come into his classroom and harass one of his children students? “Well, I’ll be having a talk with M. Damocles about this first thing tomorrow.”, he said sternly, “That boy will not set another foot in this room, or hurt you again, Marc.”

Marc lifted his head and sent the kind man a faint smile

Then suddenly, destroying the calm atmosphere were screams coming from the students who stayed after school. Juleka ran out into the hall and saw the Akuma. He wore a black mask with a small red heart above his right eye, a suit where the top half was is tailcoat that was red at the top and black at the bottom, and the ends of the tailcoat formed a broken heart. He wore black pants, black fingerless gloves that revealed his red nails, and came up to his biceps, red platform boots with metal heart buckles that came up to his knees, and in his hand was a black choker necklace with a red metal heart. She gasped when she realized the Akuma was Lucien, then went back in the room, shut the door, and told the others, “Lucien’s an Akuma!”

Alix clenched her fists, “Oh, hell no!”

M. Haberkorn shushed her, “We can’t let him know we’re still in here.”

Everyone froze when they heard the Akuma’s footsteps were getting louder as he approached the room. Nathaniel kept Marc in a protective hold as the taller boy silently cried... The footsteps soon faded away, and they all let out relieved sighs, but this moment was short-lived when the door suddenly blew off its hinges, revealing Heart Thief.

He looked around the room until his eyes land on Marc and smirks, “Oh, Emerald.”, he drawled out, “Did you miss me?”

Alix got into a fighting stance, Nathaniel moved Marc behind him, Rose and Juleka backed away but still stood close by Marc. M. Haberkorn scowled when he realized this was the student that harassed Marc

Sternly he said, “You’re not welcome here. Leave.”, but the villain just laughed

“Not until I take back what’s mine.”, he held up the collar, making Marc back away at the sight of it, “Emerald, come here.”

Alix tightened her fists, “If you think he’s gonna listen to you, you must be-!”, she silenced herself when she saw a red dagger in the shape of a heart appear in the palm of his hand

“Emerald, you know how much I hate waiting,” he chastised, then summoned four more daggers he then sent towards Alix, Rose, Juleka, Nathaniel, and M. Haberkorn. Everyone ducked out of the way, and the daggers hit a sculpture, forming cracks along the surface before it crumbled into bits. Marc looked up and didn’t have time to react before Heart Thief threw the choker at him, and it wrapped itself around his neck. Marc tried to rip it off but then suddenly came to a halt, and his arms dropped to his sides. He and the Akuma locked eyes, and Marc no longer saw Heart Thief, he saw Lucien- His devoted, caring boyfriend. Nathaniel got up, and his eyes widened in shock when he saw that Marc’s irises were now a bright red

He held his hand, “Rainbow?”, but got no response

Heart Thief sent the boy a sneer. His look softened when he looked to Marc, “Emerald, come here.”, he commanded sweetly as his eyes glowed the same shade of red as Marc’s irises

Marc stood, and with no hesitation, ran over to Heart Thief. Rose reached for his hand, but he pulled it away and went to nuzzle up against his chest

Nathaniel looked heartbroken, and even more when Marc and Heart Thief passionately kissed each other, “Oh, I knew you’d come to your senses, Emerald.”, he gently scooped him off his feet, and sent Nathaniel a smirk when Marc wrapped his arms around his neck, “Perhaps I should be calling you Ruby now.” Before he could head out, M. Haberkorn stood at the doorway

“Unhand him this instant!”, he shouted in a tone none of the art students have ever heard him use. Heart Thief just scoffed, settled Marc in his left arm, then he used his free hand to grab the man by his shirt and fling him across the room, causing him to crash into some paint cans that splattered him with a mess of colors. Rose and Juleka went to help him up while Alix and Nathaniel ran after Heart Thief, who fled during the commotion.

While running, Heart Thief summoned six heart-shaped daggers and threw them at Nathaniel and Alix. They weren’t hit, but dodging the daggers slowed them down and allowed Heart Thief to get away

He made his way outside, scaring off a few civilians, but he didn’t care. He finally had Marc back, and once he brought the Miraculous to Hawkmoth, they’ll never be separated ever again

“I told you,” he whispered, “I’d get you back, my Ruby. Nothing will keep us apart.”, he kisses Marc’s pink lips again, but was cut short when he heard, “PUT HIM DOWN!”

Standing at the top of the steps was Nathaniel, seething with rage and with visible tears streaming down his face. Heart Thief rolled his eyes and leaped away

“NO!”

—

“Excellent, Heart Thief. It shouldn’t be too long before Ladybug and Chat Noir arrive. Once you take their Miraculous, he shall be yours forever.”

Heart Thief smiled as he looked down at Marc, his hair blowing in his beautiful face as he ran, “That’s all I want.”

—

Meanwhile, in his room, Adrien was just sitting at his desk, watching footage of the Ladyblog on his three computer monitors, when he suddenly heard screams from outside. He rushed over to his window and looked to see Heart Thief leaping from roof to roof with Marc in his arms

“Is that Marc?”, he asks himself before turning to Plagg, sitting on the couch and munching on some Camembert, “Plagg, we gotta go!”

The Kwami of destruction groaned, “But I just got comfy!”

“Now!”

Plagg, Claws out!

—

Marinette was just sitting on her balcony, flipping through a fashion magazine while Tikki sat on her shoulder eating a macaron. Before the goddess of creation could take another bite, she noticed something out of the corner of her eye

“Marinette, look!”, she looked to where the Kwami was pointing and saw the Akuma running on the roof of a building. She took a closer look and shock crossed her face when she saw Marc cradled in his arms, “Marc?!”

“He must’ve been kidnapped.”, Tikki deduced

“Well, we’re gonna get him back!”

Tikki, Spots On!

—

Back at school, Nathaniel was panicking. He just lost Marc to... To... To that sleaze! What’s even worse is that he could make Marc do whatever he wants. He didn’t even want to imagine that

“Nath, is gonna be okay.”, Alix tried to reassure him

“No it’s not!”, he yelled, “You saw what he was doing to Marc! He’ll- Oh God!”

“Hey,” Alix grabs his shoulders, “he’s not gonna do anything to Marc, okay? Ladybug and Chat Noir will take care of this like they always do. A-and maybe they’ll call on you again since this is a personal thing.”

Nathaniel didn’t care about being Royt Hon again. He just wanted Marc back, “You think so?”, Alix nodded and pointed up towards the red-clad hero swinging across the city

“Once this is over, I’m giving Lucien a piece of my mind.”, she snarled

—

Couples ran out of the way or stood frozen in shock as Heart Thief and Marc walked across Pont Des Arts

“Oh, Ruby. I’m so glad to have you back.”, Heart Thief said as he combed his fingers through Marc’s hair

The writer held onto the Akuma’s free arm and sighed, “I missed you, Lucien.”

“And you don’t love anyone else, only me?”, Heart Thief asked, eyes glowing again as he softly caressed Marc cheek, causing his pink lips to curl into a smile

“No, I only love you.”, even if it was fake, Heart Thief didn’t seem to care, he was just thrilled to have Marc back in his arms and listening to his every word. There was just one thing that could make this even better

“Ruby, I never really liked how that hoodie hid your gorgeous figure.”, Heart Thief said, biting his bottom lip as he messed with the jaw string, “Remove it for me?”

Marc’s eyes flickered from crimson to green, and for a millisecond, he saw Heart Thief and not Lucien, but the Akuma didn’t seem to notice and just waited for Marc to do as he said, “L-love to.”, raising his hand to his shoulder, he began to slide the jacket off, when a voice called out,

“GET AWAY FROM HIM!”

Ladybug and Chat Noir arrived on the scene. Civilians fled, knowing how destructive these Akuma battles could get. Heart Thief stood in front of Marc and sent a glare the heroes’ way as he summoned two daggers, “You will not take my love away from me!”

Ladybug ignored him but kept her yoyo ready in case she would have to deflect those daggers. She furrowed her brow when she saw Marc, clinging onto the Akuma’s arm. That’s when she noticed his eyes were no longer green, and realized he must be being controlled by the Akuma

“Marc, whatever spell he has on you, you need to break free from it!”

“Spell?”

“Yeah, your eyes are supposed to be green! And you love Nathaniel, not him!”, Chat pointed an accusing finger at the Akuma

Suddenly, Marc felt a tinge of pain in his head and held it tightly, causing Heart String to look at him with concern, “My Ruby, are you alright?”

His eyes flickered again, but this time Heart Thief noticed, and so did the heroes, “I-I’m fine.”

Heart Thief let out a sigh of relief and turned his attention back to Ladybug and Chat, summoning ten more daggers, each one sharpened to a fine point and ready to pierce through the heroes, “If you know what’s best for you, you’ll leave me and my Ruby alone.”, he threatened, then sent the daggers at the heroes before gathering Marc in his arms and running off

Ladybug spun her yoyo, Chat spun his staff, and the two deflected each dagger. They either flew off and fell into the water, or were embedded in the floor or nearby benches. Once there were no more daggers coming for them, Ladybug and Chat swung and vaulted after Heart Thief

--

Heart Thief knew his control over Marc was weakening when he saw his eyes turning green again. He had to remove any memories of Nathaniel, seeing as the mere mention of his name would break his control over Marc

After looking around to make sure the heroes were nowhere in sight, Heart Thief stopped on the nearest rooftop and set Marc gently onto the roof, “Lucien, why did you stop?”, he asked as Heart Thief took his hand in his.

“Marc,” he started, “my Ruby.”, his eyes started glowing again, “What do you remember about Nathaniel Kurtzberg?”

Marc’s eyes began flickering again, rapidly, before settling on red, “We go to school together.”, he answered. Heart Thief’s eyes became brighter, “He... He likes to draw. I think.”

He smirked, “What else?”

“... He has brown hair?”

“Anything else you remember about Nathaniel?”, his bright red eyes became a menacing blood red

���...” Marc’s face contorted in confusion as he tried to remember who this boy was. The name sounded so familiar to him, but he couldn’t figure out why “I... I don’t know who that is.”

‘He doesn’t remember him.’, “Are you sure?”, he asked, needing confirmation

“No.” He tilted his head slightly, “Am I supposed to?”, Heart Thief kissed his forehead before answering, “No, my Ruby. He’s not important. Never has been, never will be.”, his muscular arms wrapped around Marc’s frame and pull him in for a hug, which the entranced boy gladly returned

“Found you!”

Having no time to react, Ladybug’s yoyo smacked Heart Thief in the face, making him stumble and fall on his back. Marc went to help him up but found himself being restrained by Chat

“Let me go!”, he shouted, writhing in the leather-clad hero’s hold, “Lucien!”, he called out to the Akuma who was tied up by Ladybug’s yoyo. Heart Thief swept her leg, sending Ladybug down, and freed himself from the magic weapon. Chat Noir ran after him, staff ready, but Heart Thief grabbed the staff and used it to fling him into Ladybug just as she was getting up.

Once the heroes were down, Heart Thief gathered Marc in his arms and leaped away just as Ladybug and Chat Noir got back up and situated themselves

“And I thought cats were territorial.”, Chat joke as he picked up his staff, “Did you see anything on Romeno, that might have been the akumatized object?”

Ladybug shook her head, “Nothing. But we have to keep looking.”, then she yelled out,

“LUCKY CHARM!”, the object that fell into her hands was...

“Marc and Nathaniel’s comic?”

Chat examined the cover, “Issue twelve. The one where Might Illustrator saves Inverser from Scarlet Moth’s control.”, Ladybug raised an eyebrow, to which Chat responded with a shrug, “What? I like their work.”

Ladybug flipped through the pages until she stopped on a specific one. Might Illustrator held Inverser in a loving embrace as the two kissed, and Inverser’s red and black suit faded back to white and black. Ladybug got an idea, “Chat, go after Heart Thief. I’ll be right back.”

He nodded, “On it, m’lady!”, then vaulted away

--

Back at Dupont, Alix was comforting Nathaniel, who was crying into her shoulder, “Okay, so it’s been almost two hours, but Ladybug and Chat Noir will get Marc back!” she reassured, “It almost took them an entire day to defeat some Akumas.”, she reminded him, but Nathaniel couldn’t listen, not when Marc was in the arms of some creep

He just wanted him back...

“Nathaniel!”, Ladybug called out as she landed, startling the two, “I need your help!” she looked down at the comic with her Lucky Vision, then at Nathaniel. Both were ladybug-patterned

Alix gave Nathaniel’s arm a nudge, “Is Royt gonna make a comeback?”

“Not exactly.” she holds out her hand to the redhead, “Right now, Marc needs you. Will you come with me?”

With a look of determination, Nathaniel takes the superheroine’s hand, “Let’s get Marc back.”

“And when you see Lucien,” Alix holds up her fist and smirks, “give him one of these for me, ‘kay, bud?”

Nathaniel gave his friend a nod as Ladybug wrapped her arm around him, “Oh, I’ll be giving him much worse.”, then Ladybug swung away with Nathaniel in her arms

--

After five minutes of running, Heart Thief landed right outside of the Le Grand Blanche Hotel. By the door was a sign that read, ‘Jemart and Mell Wedding in Banquet Hall’ His lips curled into a grin, “Ruby. How would you like us to always be together?”, all he got in response was a kiss on the cheek.

“Heart Thief, what is the meaning of this? I want my Miraculous!”

“And you’ll get them. Right after I make Marc mine forever.” at that, he carried Marc into the hotel.

It took almost ten minutes, but Heart Thief finally found the banquet hall and set Marc down on the floor before using his enhanced strength to punch the door down, much to the alarm of everyone in attendance at the wedding. The groom was just about to put the ring on the bride’s finger.

Heart Thief smirked, “Sorry to interrupt such a lovely ceremony, but this will only take a moment.”

“Marc?” Standing from her seat was Madelyn, dressed in a black vest with a red bow tie, a white dress shirt, black pants, and black heels, “What’s goin’ on; Why are you with an Akuma?”

Marc gave his old friend a confused look, “I’m not with an Akuma, I’m with Lucien.” the girl narrowed her eyes at the Akuma and instantly recognized him, “Rebois.”, she sneered

“Jemart. I thought the name sounded familiar.”

The muscular girl rolled up her sleeves and stormed over to the Akuma, “After all this time, even as an Akuma, you’re still a creep.” her look softened when she turned to Marc, “Mar-Mar, whatever lies this boy has been telling you, don’t believe him.”

He gave her an incredulous look, “He said he loves me.”

“Marc,” she grabs his shoulders, “you broke up with him for a reason! He’s possessive, he threatened your friends, he made you wear a collar!” she looks at the black choker around his neck, “And he still is. Mar-Mar, you’re one of my best friends. Please. Believe me when I’m telling you that Lucien- Heart Thief- Whatever! He’s using you...”

It’s a stare down between the two. Marc’s crimson red eyes started flickering again and were becoming a forest green color until Heart Thief squeezed his hand, and his eyes went back to red “Maddy, please move.”

A tear forms out of the eye of the usually tough girl, “Marc-”

In one swift motion, Madelyn was pinned to the wall by Heart Thief’s daggers, each one just an inch away from piercing her body. Marc looked back at her with concern until Heart Thief linked their arms and walked him down the aisle, prompting the bride and groom to move out of the way. The priest would have run too, but Heart Thief’s glare kept him in place.

“O-okay then.”, the priest stammered, “So, do you, Heart Thief, t-take Marc to b-be your lawfully wedded husband?”

“I do.”, he answered quickly

“Of course.”, he said before turning to Marc, “And do y-you, Marc, take Heart Thief to-to be your la-lawfully wedded husband?”

“I-”

Before he could say ‘do’, someone yelled out, “I OBJECT!”

Everyone looked to see Paris’ heroes and Nathaniel standing at the doorway. Ladybug’s earrings had all five dots, having refueled Tikki before they arrived, and she was giving Chat a bored look, “Was that necessary?” he shrugged, “I’ve always wanted to do that.”

Nathaniel’s eyes didn’t leave Marc for a second. He always fantasized about seeing Marc at an altar, but not like this.

“Crashing my wedding?!” How tacky are you?” Heart Thief shouted, pulling Marc closer to him

Nathaniel sneered, “I’m tacky?! You brainwashed my boyfriend!”

“He’s marrying me willingly! Right, Ruby?” Marc nodded.

Ladybug threw her yoyo at Heart Thief. It wrapped around his ankles, and she flung him across the room, making him crash into a wall. Nathaniel made his way over to Marc, but he ran over to the wounded Akuma, and Nathaniel couldn’t hold back his tears anymore.

Ladybug then called for her, “LUCKY CHARM!”

And in her hands was... “A magnet?”

While she looked for a way to use the lucky, Chat Noir quickly dragged Marc over to Nathaniel while Heart Thief was down, “Nathaniel, get him somewhere safe.” With a nod, Nathaniel pulled Marc out of the banquet hall, and the battle began

--

“Where are you taking me?!”, Marc asked as Nathaniel continued to pull him through the building, with some struggle since Marc kept trying to pull his hand out of his grasp

“I’m getting you away from him, Marc!”, he answered, then the two made their way into a stairwell

“What?! How do you even know my name; who are you?!”

After hearing those last three words, Nathaniel’s heart shattered. He stopped on his tracks and look Marc right in his eyes, “You... You don’t know who I am?”

Marc shook his head, “No. Look, I-I need to go back, or Lucien’s gonna-”

“Forget about Lucien!”, he shouted, “He’s hurt you in the past, and is still doing so! Marc... He doesn’t love you.”

“H-he said he-”

Nathaniel was now crying at this point, “He doesn’t mean it... I know you don’t remember me, o-or everything we’ve been through together, and you probably won’t believe me when I tell you this, but I love you! I can’t lose you, you’re... You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me...” Seeing no change on Marc’s confused face, he slid down the wall and tucked his head into his knees and silently cried, “I love you, Rainbow.”

Marc just stood, not wondering what to do right now. He wanted to go back to Lucien, but this boy was claiming that he was a part of his life right now and is clearly upset... Lucien wouldn’t mind if he stayed back to comfort... Nick? Noah?... Nathan... What did Chat Noir call him earlier?... Nathaniel! That was his name. It sounded so nice.

Marc’s eyes flickered again and became a red-orange color. “... A comic”, Nathaniel looked up in confusions, tears still streaming down his face, “We... We worked on a comic together.”

Nathaniel wiped some of his tears away, “Y-yeah. Yeah!”, he got on his feet, and held Marc’s hands, “Do you remember anything else?”

"... W-we became friends after Reverser?”

Nathaniel grinned when he realized Marc’s memories of him were slowly returning, and his eyes were going back to their normal color with each memory, “Yes! That’s right! What else?”

“Uh... I had to sleep over your house after Alix made us watch a scary movie.”, his eyes faded to yellow-orange

Nathaniel blushed at the memory. Marc’s parents were out of town that week and he did not wanna sleep alone, so he offered to let him sleep over his house. In his room... In his bed.

“We went to Comic Con together as Ruby and Sapphire,” he chuckled, “sold a few of our comics, and... And... You told me you love me.”

“I do. And I always will... Marc... My Rainbow. If you take off that choker, I can guarantee that you’ll know who actually loves you, and you’ll know who you love.”, Nathaniel wrapped his arms around Marc’s waist and pulled him in for a hug. His hugs felt so different from Lucien’s; they were warmer. “If that person is still Lucien, know that I’ll never stop loving you.”

Marc slowly reached for his choker and undid the clasp. Once the offending material was no longer around his neck, Marc threw it to the floor, causing it to break.

“Rainbow?”, Nathaniel whispered. He looked and saw Marc’s beautiful green eyes once again, and brimming with tears

“I missed you.”

“... I missed you too!”

The two kissed, hands clasped together and fitting perfectly, and bodies pressed against each other. This tender moment was cut short when they heard a flapping sound and looked to see an Akuma fluttering beside them. Nathaniel glared at the thing that almost took away his boyfriend, and snatched it in his hands

“Nath!”, Marc exclaimed worriedly, “Are you okay.”

He nodded, “Yeah. I’m way too happy to become Akumatized.” Marc smiled and kissed his cheek

--

The two made their way back into the banquet hall and took in the scene before them. The wedding guests took cover on the other side of the room, and Heart Thief was dangling over a hole in the floor that was no doubt Cataclysmed. Ladybug’s yoyo, which had been thrown over a chandelier, was tied around the Lucky Charm magnet that was stuck to the metal heart-shaped buckles on his boots. Ladybug and Chat Noir kept looking to see where the Akumatized object was until Nathaniel cleared his throat and the heroes turned their attention to him and Marc.

Ladybug smiled, “Marc! You’re back!”

“That’s great, but we still can’t find the Akuma.”, Chat said as he continued looking

“Oh, it was in Marc’s choker necklace.” Nathaniel said, chuckling when Ladybug and Chat facepalmed

Ladybug retracted her yoyo and Heart Thief fell back into the hole before crawling back out. With a nod from the spotted heroine, Nathaniel opened his hands and released the Akuma, only for it to be caught by Ladybug’s yoyo

“No more evil-doing for you, little Akuma. Time to de-evilize! Gotcha!”

The newly purified butterfly fluttered out of the yoyo, “Bye-bye, little butterfly.”, Ladybug told it, then pulled the magnet off of Heart Thief’s boot and tossed it into the air, “MIRACULOUS LADYBUG!”

The magnet burst into thousands of ladybugs that flew around Paris. They fixed the banquet hall, the art room, and got rid of the daggers throws by Heart Thief. Black and purple mist engulfed Heart Thief then lifted to reveal Lucien. He gets up and furrows his brow, “What am I doing here?” Hearing someone clear their throat, he turned around and saw Marc and Nathaniel glaring at him with such malice, but Marc’s glare was more intense

Marc stormed over to him and rolled up one of his sleeves, “Em-Emerald, I-” He was cut off a powerful left hook right to his face that sent him to the floor, much to the shock of Nathaniel, Ladybug, and Chat “You had that coming a long time ago, Rebois!”

“WHOO!”, Madelyn cheered as she made her way over to him and wrapped her arm around his shoulder, “My boy can still throw a mean hook!”, Marc laughed and hugged her, “Hey, Maddy.”, “Hey my little gay of sunshine!”, she then noticed Nathaniel and smiled, “So I’m guessing he’s your new boyfriend?”

Marc pulled away from the hug and made his way over to Nathaniel. The two held hands, confirming Madelyn’s suspicion “Well, I already like him a lot better than Rebois.”, she gave the de-akumatized boy’s leg a kick

Ladybug and Chat Noir fist-bumped, “Pound it!”

--

“Ladybug and Chat Noir, like Heart Thief, I don’t care how long it takes until I finally have what’s mine! And as for Marc Anciel... I’ll still be keeping a close eye on you...”

--

It was a new day at school, no one’s seen Lucien for a week. His Akumatization a history at Vadim spread like a wildfire, now everyone knew exactly the kind of person he was. Kim, Alix, and the whole school fútbol team took down their (not literal) shrine to him. Rumors were spreading too- ‘Lucien got expelled’, ‘Lucien went back to Vadim’, ‘Lucien fled to Bombay’, ‘Lucien melted his head’, ‘Lucien’s totally dead’. Okay, so that last two were a little outlandish, but at least everything was back to normal

As Marc and Nathaniel were walking home after art club, Marc got a text from his phone, “It’s from Maddy.”, he smiled as he read the message, “The GSA social is coming up. She, Mehdi and Syd wanna know if we’re free to go on Saturday.”

Nathaniel smiled and kissed his cheek, “Tell them we’ll be there, and I can’t wait to meet everyone.”

Taglist:

@toodaloo-kangaroo

[ramblings-of-a-mad-cat]

(Oh, sorry, here it is) 10. Do you think you could do one of those my ship in five minutes things for tulula?

“My ship in five minutes?” I don’t think I know what that is. Hold on, let me bust out the old Google. (One search later.) Ooh, this looks fun! Okay, so I don’t really have the means to recreate that template, but I’ll try to answer all of the questions as best I can! 

Height Difference: Tulip is 5’5. Merula is 5’2. I just can’t picture Merula ever being the tall one. She is shorter than everyone she knows, it’s just a fact. A fact that infuriates her. 

Age Difference: Well they’re the same age, but I’ve always interpreted Tulip as having an April birthday, and Merula having one in November. She just has total Scorpio energy.

How does it happen? Very much falls on the “unintentionally” side of that scale. Merula doesn’t want to fall for anyone because she would think of it as a weakness, but she slowly but surely falls hard for Tulip. On the other hand, I think Tulip fell for Merula almost immediately, or at least within the first time she spent an extended period talking to her. I like to imagine that Tulip made it her goal to prank everyone in her year at least once when she was a first year. That Merula was the only person to catch on ahead of time and retaliate. Which caused Tulip to realize she’d met her match.

Showing Affection: I feel like Tulip takes the initiative, and Merula doesn’t. I feel like Merula is the more verbal one, and Tulip shows her fondness through actions. Like big, grand gestures. Or pranks. So many pranks. I feel like Merula would be more free about expressing affection over time, but it would take time. Probably longer than it would have taken before they had their falling-out, but AUs can change everything.

Handling Conflict: They are polar opposites Tulip is the more laid-back girlfriend who takes some time to mull things over. Merula starts fights more easily but she also forgives more quickly. It’s all connected to her short temper and her insecurities. I feel like Tulip one-hundred percent has anxieties and insecurities as well, but I also firmly believe that she more or less becomes a different person when she’s “wrangling” Merula. More capable. Because one of them has to be. 

Dealing with Jealousy: If you know my head-canons and interpretations about these two, then this one is probably not going to be a surprise at all. Simply put, Merula is so totally the jealous type. She’s so insecure and territorial around the people she dates. She doesn’t want to share. She’s also very needy, she would need more attention. Tulip on the other hand? Look, I’m not saying that watching Merula faun over Jacob didn’t kill her inside. But on the whole, she just doesn’t get jealous. She’s more likely to want her space, though not as much when it comes to Merula. I actually interpret Tulip as poly-amorous. 

Relationship Attitude: This one is quite simple. They are both highly dedicated. I don’t think Merula knows how to be “casual.” Like I don’t think she knows how to be in a relationship at all, and she wouldn’t even bother trying for anyone that she felt less than serious about. Tulip is certainly serious about Merula in return. But I think she’s more into PDA, that Merula would be less comfortable with cuddling or holding hands in front of people, etc. 

Attachment: Merula has a bad case of Separation Anxiety but she would never agree that this is true. She so badly wants to be Independent and be seen as someone who’s Independent. Contrariwise, she wishes Tulip had more Separation Anxiety and was less Independent. But assuming that this is when they’re in a stable relationship, Tulip doesn’t have that anxiety anymore. I’d say they can both get pretty overprotective, but that Tulip is the more relaxed one. 

Miscellaneous: Tulip is the first to apologize after a fight. She is also the first to confess her feelings. Merula does the cooking because Tulip is only slightly better at that then she is at singing. I don’t think either of them are that charismatic or popular, though Tulip is probably slightly moreso. I don’t think either of them would be particularly good at caregiving. They probably wouldn’t know what to do or would panic. I foresee Tulip getting her act together more quickly, however. Merula is the one who does most of the talking. She also does the housework even though Tulip is better at it, because Tulip simply can’t be trusted not to plant dungbombs behind the cushions. Tulip has better penmanship. They probably would switch off whoever was the designated driver, or else call the Knight Bus because they both got drunk when one of them was supposed to stay sober. As for who has more experience in relationships? Well, probably Tulip. I also think she would be more sensitive to emotional changes, if only because Merula wears her heart on her sleeve and tends to be pretty wrapped up in herself. But I actually think Merula would be the one to plan a proposal, that her whole plan would blow up in her face, and she would have a tantrum about this. Leading to Tulip completely turning the tables on her, and proposing herself. Then they lived happily ever after. Neither of them dies protecting the other because that would conflict with their destiny which is to grow old together and not die :)

[photolover82]

The Masked Singer Season 5 Episode 2 Recap: It’s Group B Time, let’s meet them! (Commentary & Guesses)

Hello my fellow Masked Singer fanatics! Welcome (or welcome back) to Ana’s Masked Singer recap, where I, Ana (nice to virtually meet you btw), recap every single episode of The Masked Singer. Here we are again with season 5, but this time another group, Group B, which consist of Black Swan 🖤🦢, Piglet 🐷, Chameleon 🦎, Grandpa Monster 👹 👴, and Phoenix 🦜.

So, let’s begin with the first eliminated contestant of Group B:

The first eliminated contestant was:

*DRUMROLL PLEASE*

Phoenix 🦜

Commentary: Ok, so this wasn’t surprising whatsoever, she sang Tik Tok by Kesha and you can obviously tell that she isn’t a singer at all. Like idk how else to explain it to you guys, but I guess she was talk singing... kind of like Wendy/the lips last season... so it was kind of easy the moment she opened her mouth to start singing to recognize immediately who it was...

Having said that, she was revealed to be (as I knew, this one wasn’t hard)...

*DRUMROLL PLEASE*

Caitlyn Jenner

Hehe I knew it! Again, like Wendy Williams aka the lips, this was way too obvious. She already walked around Hollywood Blvd with the Don’t Talk to me hoodie on so I knew she was going to be on the show but the min I saw Phoenix, the clues, and the moment she opened her mouth, I was so certain it was Caitlyn. No, I am not a big Kardashian/Jenner fan tbh but I used to watch the show way back when.... like in 2016? I am not sure, but I recognized her voice immediately.

Now onto my guesses for the remaining 4:

1. Black Swan 🦢🖤

Commentary: So she sang Barracuda by Heart and damn, she got a strong voice! It’s a really amazing voice, even though the song choice wasn’t my favorite, because it didn’t suit her voice completely and showcase her range, but she was badass (can I say that? Whatever, this is my show, I’ll say it, it’s not THAT bad of a word) tbh. In certain parts, she was like screaming a lot and I was like um maybe this isn’t her best song choice but her voice is amazing! She gives me Seahorse mixed with Flamingo vibes, I love her!

I think she is singer extraordinaire:

Jojo (not Siwa but we have another Jojo on our hands)

Reasoning/Clues: there are so many clues that match but her voice is the main thing that clicked for me that it was her, but let’s look at those clues so you can get the picture:

Wanted Poster with RV highlighted= she appeared in the movie RV with Robin Williams

She talks about being trapped and someone else’s prey and then getting out of it= she was trapped in her record label & there was controversy surrounding it and she had to sue her label for not releasing her music

A 5 on a watch= she toured with 5th harmony and has released 5 albums

Cluedledoo (Rooster) clue= she covered a monster= she covered one of T-Pain aka the Monster from season 1’s songs

2. Piglet 🐷

Commentary: He was my favorite of the night with his rendition of Speechless by Dan + Shay! You guys know if you have seen my recaps in season 3 (or even last week with Robopine) that I have a soft spot for a guy who has a super silky voice, like either boy band type or R&B smooth af kinda vibe (i.e. Fox in season 2, Turtle in season 3, Robopine in season 5).... or should I say any guy who can falsetto and Piglet is giving me those boy band smooth vibes, I love it so much! His voice is soooo familiar I am so sure about this one by the way.

My guess and I am so sure of this is:

Nick Lachey

Reasoning/Clues: This one I recognized immediately, the voice was really easy to figure out, but these clues also are pretty convincing (oh and he was on Ken’s show, I Can See Your Voice, so it’s not surprising that he would be on this show):

The clue package had a dating show vibe = reminiscent of Love is Blind, the Netflix dating show he hosts with his wife Vanessa

The world saw his heart break= he had a very public relationship with his ex-wife Jessica Simpson and they even had a reality show together called Newlyweds

Cluedle-doo clue: “knows how to stay cool even in the heat”= referring to his past aka his boy band 98 degrees (get it? Because that’s the heat and they are cool because they are a boy band... well played Masked Singer well played... I wanna meet whoever makes these clues because they are great with puns and they seem super clever)

3. Chameleon 🦎

Commentary: Chameleon surprised me I am not gonna lie. I thought he was going to be another athlete like Whatchamacallit last season or White Tiger from season 3 because he was so tall but nope he surprised me with his rendition of Ride with Me by Nelly. He seems like a legit rapper and I liked him a lot than I thought I would honestly so this guess isn’t totally out of left field.

My guess is that this is...

Wiz Khalifa

Reasoning/Clues: so yeah, the voice and the height kinda gave it away to me (Wiz is 6 foot 4 inches and his body type matches the chameleon), but also yeah clues I have to give you guys some logic bombs instead of being like eh that voice and height BOOM WIZ KHALIFA... yeah no it doesn’t work like that, so here are the logic bombs hehe:

Dice with 2 and 3 on it= he did a song with Miley Cyrus called 23

007 clue= he has a song called (yes this is real, look it up) James Bong (omg I am trying not to laugh while typing this but whatttt?! Google really is a gem omg 😳😂) and he played James Bond in the music video

His love of technology & “put tech in technicolor”= apparently, the guy is a huge tech geek and has said it in a lot of interviews (wow humans are so complex and cool, I would have never thought that this man is a tech savvy guy... but the more you know I guess <P.S. I Googled half of these things... like idk this off the top of my head duh, I usually go by voice with my guesses and then I google the clues>)

4. Grandpa Monster

Commentary: He sang Mambo No. 5 and yeah it’s a basic choice for a song, but I liked it. He is not my favorite by any means and now that I listen to it again, I can only hear this person and I am not a fan of him like whatsoever (even tho I gotta acknowledge he has changed and I have *I KNOW... I HATE ME TOO* agreed with stuff he has said in his podcast un ironically.... yeah I am so sorry, I hate myself for saying this too... anyways let’s just get to the person I mean

I have a sneaking suspicion that it is (unfortunately):

Logan Paul

Reasoning/Clues: Yup, um... I really hope I am wrong but honestly ever since someone said it in the YouTube comments section of his performance, I can’t un hear it and I am shook honestly (at least it’s not his brother... I mean we can get worse, and he has respected the pandemic and not been a prick like his *cough* brother *cough*... just saying.. oh and if you don’t know what I am talking about or who this is, he’s a YouTuber who got into some um controversy because he filmed a dead body in 2018 so there’s that... oh and his brother has done a billion worse things than him, but you can Google that one if you are interested in finding out more because it’s too much for me to talk about and we are not even talking about Jake (that’s the brother))... Anyways, sorry, I ramble, but ugh the clues seem convincing and it irks me that it is because I am not a fan of neither of these guys and I don’t want them in the show but whatever I guess he’s the lesser of 2 evils:

He was a troublemaking fool as a youngster= yeah probably regarding that suicide forest video a couple of years ago (that ok, lemme give him credit, he has apologized for it and has kind of proven himself... yuck I hate saying that, I am NOT defending him I swear)

Acting out for all eyes on me= he used to be very well known for pranks on his channel back in the day (before the incident) and he did some stupid stuff for clout lemme tell ya (I never liked these guys, like ever, I thought they were weird.... not my demographic I guess, I wasn’t 12 nor a boy)

6 in Xs and Os like football plays = he did play football 🏈 in high school, he was so good that and actually attributes playing football for long term brain damage he has that makes him as the Wikipedia article says it (I am legit gonna quote what it says because I thought it was fascinating) “affects his ability to have empathy and a human connection with others.” (Mind you, he himself claimed this according to this article)

“Acting out”= he has acted in a few things before and starred in The Thinning

Web with the shooting star= he is a web star, get it? YouTube... web star... hehe again these clue writers are *chef’s kiss*

Cluedle-doo clue: he has trained for battle= now his new thing is boxing and he has trained for actual fights before, his first one being against British YouTuber KSI which he lost... oh and I almost forgot, how can I forget this cute little detail.... he is set to fight Floyd Mayweather this summer apparently... OH AND DID I MENTION HE IS MAKING 5 MILLION DOLLARS FROM THIS DEAL?! He’s winning either way with this fight like damn... but that wasn’t part of it, I just thought it was trippy... again I say, Google is a gem, u find some interesting reads

Ok so that’s it (what a great note to end on lol)! I hope you guys enjoy! Sorry for it being so long and taking so much time to do.. it’s been a crazy last couple of days! I will try to get the next one this upcoming weekend so I’ll see you guys then. (Ohhh btw I now live tweet the show on my Twitter- @photolover82 so if you want to follow me on there and live tweet with me, that can be fun!) Bye guys and don’t forget to like, comment, and do all the social media-y things, you know the drill!

[nitholites]

Daminette Soulmate AU

Inspired by this post by @thepeacetea. Thank you for making an AU with so much Badass!Marinette possibilities. We. Stan. Epic. Marinette. I took a few creative liberties by changing how soulmates work a little bit, I hope no one minds too much. If people want more of this, I'll see what I can do. But, if this inspires anyone to write or add onto this- I personally highly encourage it! Seeing the works of art people can make from one thing are always inspiring to me. I'd love to see what, if anything, comes from this.

That's enough from me- time for the fic!

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Marinette sighed, letting her mind wander back. She remembered knowing several languages before she hit double digits, her body reacting to surprise by calming her mind, spinning around, assessing the situation, and figuring the easiest way to... disable whomever startled her. It took a surprising amount of self control to act like a normal kid, which made her wonder.

Who the heck was her soulmate?

She had to have one- not because she wanted one but because of all the skills she couldn't explain having any other way. She remembered asking her parents about soulmates, and getting a few answers. Soulmates weren't common- actually being extremely rare. The bond was usually the same, though. A kind of skill share.

The more your soulmate used a skill or integrated it into their life, the more normal the skill felt to you, becoming habit over time. Which is why Marinette always knew the exits, shadows, hidden corners, number of people in a room with her, direction, and how to... disable anyone at any given time.

Her footsteps were always silent, and she kept to the shadows of the room by habit. Several times, she accidentally sneaked up on her parents or friends when she thought she wasn't being sneaky at all. She was surprisingly talented at gymnastics, and the sport was relaxing to her, so she continued it all through school.

When she became Ladybug, she could only make a mental note to thank her soulmate profusely for knowing so many self-defense styles and aggressive fighting.

At first, Chat had a major crush on her, but after showing him he wasn't her soulmate (by yelling at him in every language she knew [which were about 5 he didn't]), he had to accept the facts.

Life went on, and soon Lila was brought into the picture. Adrien didn't help, and the class soon left Marinette behind, bullying her and excluding her. But still, Marinette continued to do the best she could as the class representative.

Two years after she became Ladybug, Marinette won her class a trip to Gotham to tour the city and learn more about the American school system. They'd stay for the remainder of the school year (about two months) and would have the chance to intern under several high-class businesses, industries, and names. Rumor had it that whoever earned the right to would work with the Waynes during the summer for their internship, a huge boost to the lucky winner's resume.

Marinette organised everything for the trip- the hotel, activities, tours, school, etc- nearly without help (if you counted Tikki and Luka- two of Marinette's last friends and people who didn't even go to her school!).

The plane ride to Gotham wasn't very interesting. Marinette sat in the back alone while Lila and her lackeys gossipped and lied (both knowingly and unknowingly) about this and that. Every so often, Marinette would hear something about a Dimitri Wayne?

She inwardly scoffed, wondering if Lila meant the only blood Wayne child. Marinette had done quite a bit of research into Gotham, it's heroes vigilantes, villains, and important figures. 99% of Lila's claims about the Waynes could be disproven by a simple Google search, yet...

Marinette sighed, watching the sheep flock to the wolf.

There's nothing I can do for those who swallow such obvious lies.

They reached Gotham around 9pm, going straight to the hotel and getting their rooms. Marinette, predictably, was alone. She was thankful for that, though, because then she could leave and go Ladybug-ing whenever she felt she needed to.

Of course, Marinette knew the rough locations of everything she'd visit, but... it would be handy, seeing Gotham from the air and in person.

"What do you think, Tikki? Should Ladybug say hello to Gotham?"

"Not Ladybug, per-say. What if Hawkmoth figured out we weren't in Paris?"

Marinette nodded at the flying Kwami, hovering right in front of her face. "A change in identities, then. Think you can whip up something I'd like?"

Tikki nodded with a smile, thinking for a moment before shooting her Chosen a thumbs up. "Tikki, spots on!"

Before she left, she took a look at herself in the mirror, smiling at the new outfit.

Her hair, once midnight black/blue, was red with black stripes, gathered up into a bun at the top of her head with a black ribbon tying it together and the ends sticking up to form antenna-like things. Her bangs, once swept to the side now framed her face, the left side red and the right black. The ends brushed her chin, but never seemed to get in her way. Her mask was black like the rest of her outfit, red decal swirling intricately across the fabric. Red accents outlined where her gloves, boots, and sleeves were against a black background. Instead of the skin tight onesie, her outfit was split into four parts- the top, bottoms, gloves, and boots. Her top took a different style, looking more like a Chinese or Japanese kimono top, the bell sleeves covering her palms and loose. Red swirled around the top in descrete roses, red lining the hems. Her gloves were red, black roses stitched into the fabric on the back. Her pants were black and only reached her mid-calf, red roses stitched near the cutoff. Her ankle boots were plain black, the three-inch heel not inhibiting her in any way shape or form (thankfully) and her yo-yo was still strapped to her hip, but harder to see. On her back was a staff like Chat Noir's, but black and with spots indicating the button.

She tapped her chin, humming in thought. "I suppose I'll need a new name for Gotham." She shrugged, deciding to think about it later. She easily opened the window and hopped out, getting used to using the staff almost immediately as she vaulted over the roofs near the hotel, quickly gaining distance.

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Nightwing frowned, eyes tracking the strange red and black figure who was easily taking down thugs twice their size. Seems like a new vigilante's in town, he thought, bringing a hand up to his comm. "Has anyone seen a new vigilante around?"

"No one's reported anything, why?"

He slid farther back into the shadows of the ally way he was crouched in, watching as the- what he could now tell- woman glanced around the small area. "I may have found one. See if you can find anything on her, Oracle. We'd better figure out if she's friend or foe before jumping in."

"Copy that. For now, track her."

"Way ahead of you," he said, silently jumping after her when she used some kind of baton to leap over the closest building.

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Marinette paused, stopping on the roof. Her tail seemed more interested in finding out who she was than kidnapping or attacking her, as they would have done so an hour ago when she let them close. She knew she couldn't allow that- no matter who was tailing her. She pulled her yo-yo off her hip, keeping her tail carefully behind her even as they slowly and stealthy approached. They sounded male, if the heavier steps meant anything.

With practiced ease, she opened the weapon, reaching into the glowing pink and pulling out the Fox Miraculous. She had long since started putting the Box of Miracles in her yo-yo when she transformed, careful to keep the Miraculi out of Hawkmoth's hands. She slipped the necklace on, nodding once at Trixx. She held out her hands as she said, "Trixx, Tikki, unify."

Orange replaced the red in her costume, an orange glow surrounding her for a second. No more red was found on the heroine, the dark color replaced by a dark orange and the staff replaced with a flute on her back. She turned on her heel towards her tail, a carefully blank look on her face. "Come out," she demanded, suppressing her surprise when Nightwing appeared.

Neither spoke for a moment, eyeing each other and mentally figuring each other's strengths and weaknesses. "Why were you following me," she asked, keeping her spine straight.

"The better question is, why are you here? Gotham has more than enough protectors."

"I won't be here for long. The League has made it's decision loud and clear, and I won't 'waste your time with pranks'," she angrly spit out, heavy quotations in her sentence. She watched as mild confusion spread on the bird's face, but felt only a slight ping of regret, her emotions having watered down and muted over the years of fighting Hawkmoth. Ladybug couldn't be compromised, after all.

"What are you talking about?"

"Ask those receiving requests for help about a French heroine named Ladybug," she said, pulling the flute off her back. She played an ancient tune that flew into her fingers, removed the instrument from her lips, and fired the glowing orange ball towards the ground, shouting, "Mirage," as she did so. Orange smoke filled the area, a million masked heroines going in all directions and tricking the sensors in Nightwing's mask as she went back to her room, only staying awake long enough to feed the Kwamis and fall into her bed.

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Red Robin frowned as he and Oracle looked through the footage from earlier, replaying it over and over. "Magic?"

"Has to be," he said, his brows furrowing as he scanned the footage once more. "There's no holographic projectors, and she didn't seem to know about the hidden cameras on him."

Oracle hummed, fingers flying away. "Any luck finding sources for the so-called heroine in France?"

Tim had been looking ever since the girl mentioned heroes in the country, only finding the Ladyblog. He didn't count it as credible, what with the obvious CGI. "No. Just a fake source," he said, sighing. "Maybe we should look through the League records. See if we can find anything."

"Way ahead of you," Barbara said, hitting the final key decisivly. "Four clips, one response."

"Play them."

A girl in a red and black spotted mask looked into the camera, the Eiffel Tower in the background. In accented English, she spoke. "Hello. My name is Ladybug, and I'm a new hero for Paris. My city is being terrorized by a villain who preys on any powerful, negative emotions he can find using the power of the Butterfly. I haven't been a hero long- today marks the full week. But I know we need help. My partner and I don't know what we're doing yet, and I can only drag us through battles so often until we run out of steam." Her blue eyes softened, hope and uncertainty in them.

"Please. If you get this- send help. Preferably someone with detective abilities and a good handle on their emotions so we can find Hawkmoth faster. I don't want to think of what damage Paris would go under if we had to fight an Akumatized member of the League..." She sighed, giving the camera a hopeful smile. "Bug out."

The next was in the middle of the day, giant bubbles floating in the air. The camera zoomed in on one, seeing adults trapped. The angle shifted to the streets, where kids were running rampant without supervision. "I don't know if I can fix the damage they'll do," the same voice called from out of the shot. "My Cure only works with very specific damages- and I don't think this counts. Please- the longer this goes on, the more powerful Hawkmoth becomes." Her voice held so much hope, it was nearly painful. "Ladybug out."

The next was again in the middle of the day, but this time, the streets were flooded. Only a few hundred people could be seen safe on roofs, and Ladybug did a full sweep of the city on camera before landing beside a blond hero in a black cat costume. "Syren is the most deadly Akuma we've seen so far," the heroine- Ladybug- said somberly. "I don't know what this will do to my people's mental health. It's already been months since Hawkmoth started his reign, but the changes may be permanent. Even a week after he started, I could see the changes in my people. They're more... empty. Like shells of the people they once were, scared to feel anything for the threat of Hawkmoth and harming their loved ones. I only pray my power continues to erase the memories of all those who become Akumatized, dead, or under the victim's control. My people are traumatized enough already. If anyone sees this, please.... send help."

The final clip showed a furious Ladybug staring into the camera, fires raging behind her. "It's been over a year since I first asked for your help. After so long, I thought I had accepted that no help was coming. But understand- you're leaving the fate of the world in a few teenagers hands! We can't keep going on like this- we'll burn out and Hawkmoth will win! Look at what Hawkmoth caused this time!" She turned the camera slowly, gathering the flaming city of love on screen. Craters filled the streets, no building over a story was intact. Bodies littered the streets- some charred and some bleeding. The Eiffel Tower was in pieces, crushing more people. Flames wracked the once-beautiful city, ash blocking the sun. "He will only get stronger, as will the Akuma he creates. But we won't without guidance and training! And no one on Team Miraculous has any kind of detective training- we aren't getting any closer to the source of the problem! And if Hawkmoth defeats both Chat Noir and I, the entire world may be doomed, depending on his wish." The camera was set down, Ladybug walking in front of it with a spotted object- something looking like a frying pan- in her hand. She threw it up, shouting "Miraculous Ladybug," as she did so. Millions of pink dots swarmed the city, fixing all damages and bringing people back to life wherever they touched. She swung down to a boy with black hair tipped blue, camera on his face, yet it was blurred to protect his identity. "Sir, tell me about this attack. I'm sorry to bring it up so soon, but the League cannot ignore an innocent's cry for help."

When he spoke, his voice went through a some kind of modifier. "Okay, Ladybug... Well, my sister and I were walking home from school. We had band practice later today- I guess that's cancelled. Anyway, we were minding our own business when Inferna came. I tried protecting my sister, but..." He took a deep breath. "She was too fast. My sister burned alive right in front of me, and I couldn't do anything."

"I'm sorry," Ladybug said, a hand coming to lay on the boy's shoulder. "I'm sorry we didn't stop her in time. That you had to see this. That you have to remember. If I could wipe that memory from you, I would, but..." A heavy sigh came from behind the camera. "Thank you for sharing." The process repeated with a couple more people- some young some old, and some who died during the experience. All were traumatized from this Akuma, and previous, yet they had hope. At the end, Ladybug turned the camera on herself, face stern. "I know this may not seem possible to you. I know this may look like editing, and that this may be a waste of time. But if you think that, spend a weekend in Paris. See for yourself what we've become. Ladybug out."

The only thing left was a letter from the League. It amounted to, "Don't send in prank calls anymore. You're taking away from those who need it."

Tim and Barbara were furious. But this issue needed care.

It was time to call the Batman.

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Bruce's brows drew closer and closer as the clips played, his anger obvious when the letter was shown. But, unsurprisingly, his reaction was the most subdued of those in the room.

Anger freely rolled off of Jason, Dick, Barbara, Damian, and even Alfred. Tim had already started to get his feelings under control as his fingers flew across the keyboard, his face reflecting his concentration. "I don't recognize the signature on the letter," Bruce stated. Which was strange, because he kept tabs on everyone who worked for the League. Just in case.

"You're not the only one," Tim said, keeping his eyes on the screen in front of him. "I can't find this guy anywhere. I'm starting to think he doesn't exist, but..."

"That would mean the League has someone who's either working with Hawkmoth- who seems to be the one attacking Paris- or someone who doesn't want the situation to be known," Dick said, crossing his arms. "Neither situation is good."

"So what can we do about it?" All eyes turned to Damian until he explained. "She said Hawkmoth was using the people's emotions against them. Members of the League aren't exactly the most emotionally strong, and a lot of them use negative emotions to strengthen themselves in battle."

"You're uncharacteristically angry about this," Bruce observed, watching as his youngest didn't react to his statement outside of raising an eyebrow. This wasn't the first time Damian reacted differently than expected. Bursts of outrage or annoyance at specific groups of people, almost muted emotions, nearly inhumane emotional recovery. At first, Bruce hoped the Wayne was simply getting a better control on his emotions, but after a while of observing... He realized that wasn't the case. "What's going on, Damian?"

The teen hesitated, the expression he usually made when he scolded himself appearing on his face. "What's your view on soulmates?"

Bruce blinked, having categorized that specific response as less than likely. "I think if you have one, you should be able to decide to seek them out or not. To have the option of creating a life with them if you so chose. Damian, is your soulmate in trouble?"

"My first language, as you know, is Arabic. But my second is French- if you can call it a second. The language simply appeared in my head the same time I was learning Arabic as a baby, according to my caretakers. I'd switch between the two without thought as a child," Damian explained. "While I was learning other languages, the same thing happened to Mandarin. When I had a pastry for the first time after I moved in with you, I could instantly tell what ingredients the chef used, how much, and what adding more or less of certain ingredient would do to the final product. With all this, I've deduced my soulmate is a French-Chinese baker," Damian revealed. "Now, with this information about Paris..."

"You think your soulmate is in danger," Dick accurately guessed. "Damn, that must be infuriating."

"How many times have they died when help from the League could have saved them," Damian wondered. "How many times have we let them down?"

"You have to remember, Baby Bird- your soulmate gets your skills, too," Tim called, still clacking away. "Whoever they are, they'd put up one hell of a fight if anyone tried attacking."

"I'm aware, Drake. But that doesn't mean they're invincible to drowning and getting crushed."

"Why do you think they're in Paris, specifically," Dick asked.

"It takes effort to feel negative emotions now," the youngest Wayne said. "All of you know I don't have the longest temper. But when I'm not thinking about it, my negative emotions just... dissapere. All of them."

"If what Ladybug said was true, and their terrorist uses emotions to take control of the person, that's likely what the people have taken to to avoid being controlled," Dick hummed, frowns appearing on everyone's faces.

"For now, let's inform the rest of the League," Bruce decided, walking to the computer. "Let's see if anyone has an idea of what's going on."

Alfred, meanwhile, frowned. If the Ladybug is in play... the world is at stake.

.

.

.

Marinette never had good luck in her day to day life. She guessed all her good luck was spent as Ladybug, and she needed a luck balance or something. Which is how she chose the one outlet in the entire hotel that didn't work. Her phone died during the night, so she woke up late, the clock on the bedstand reading 8:17 am. The bus was set to leave at 8, but she wouldn't be surprised if Lila had convinced them to leave earlier. It was only thanks to the Kwamis that she got up that early, but she still missed the bus. She scrambled to get ready, sprinting out of the hotel after five minutes. She found a nearby allyway, ducking into it and letting Tikki fly out of her jacket. "We gotta hurry. Tikki, spots on!"

.

.

.

Damian scowled, pinching the bridge of his nose as the group in front of him scrambled to find their missing student. "Didn't you call roll," he asked in French, being the translator and main guide for Wayne Enterprises.

"Well, yes, but... I swear Marinette was with us!"

He was starting not to like the teacher too much. Or the gaggle of girls gossiping about how the missing student just wanted attention. "You realize Gotham has the highest crime rates in the US, correct?" At the teacher's shaky nod, he continued, his scowl deepening. "Then why on Earth would you allow one of your students to go missing?!"

He was about to rant more when the doors slid open, a girl with pigtails running through and out of breath. "I'm here," she gasped, her hands resting on her knees.

"Marinette! There you are."

The bluest eyes Damian had ever seen (a high honer considering his father and Grayson) looked up, holding regret. "Sorry, Madame. My phone died, so the alarm didn't go off. It won't happen again."

"See that it doesn't. We're going to have to hurry through this to stay on schedule."

"Now hold on," Damian growled, steeping between the teacher and her students. "You were just saying that she was in the bus this morning. Now you're saying it's her fault you didn't check the bus properly before leaving?"

The woman paled as surprise grew in the girl's eyes. "It's alright now," she said, standing and catching her breath. "I'm here and safe, and we're already behind. Let's just leave this in the past and go on with the tour."

"You don't seem to understand the danger you could have been in, miss...?"

"Marinette."

"Marinette. Any one of Gotham's rouges could have picked you up, or a common thief or mugger could have cornered you. Especially if you were alone."

"I'm aware," she calmly responded. "That would have been their mistake. There's a reason few Akuma come after me anymore."

"Oh, yeah," a dark boy with a red cap said. "I keep forgetting your crazy soulmate, dudette."

"Soulmate," the dark girl with glasses asked, looking to the boy in confusion. "Marinette doesn't have a soulmate. She would have told me."

Marinette sighed through her nose, seemingly gathering herself. "Alya, I don't like talking about my soulmate. I don't know what they're comfortable sharing about their skills, so I try not to talk about it."

Damian's respect for the small girl shot through the roof. "Yeah, but the dudette was awesome against playground bullies," the boy said, gathering attention. "Kim, you remember?" A tall boy nodded, a grin on his face.

"It was really cool to watch this tiny little girl in pigtails completely destroy them," he commented. "Dunno how she did it to this day, but there were always two things Marinette's never stood for. Liars and bullies."

"Then how come she is one," the glasses girl from earlier asked, her brows furrowing. "Something doesn't add up."

"Maybe she changed," a girl with sasauge hair said. "People do that."

All of a sudden, the atmosphere changed, interest becoming hostility. "Guys, let's just do this," Marinette said, looking tired. She grabbed the extra pass in the tub and plopped it around her neck.

.

.

Lunch couldn't come soon enough for Marinette and Damian. The former because she forgot to grab breakfast, and the latter so he could talk to his family about Marinette's treatment within the class. He heard everything said about her during the tour, and his anger at the class only grew. Usually, he wouldn't care and just be annoyed at the gossip, but even he could see how kind she was. Several times, she interacted with the staff the others ignored, seeing if she could help them carry something or open doors or pick up something they dropped. She was fluent in English, too, and more often than not whatever language the employee spoke first. Which was odd, since WE prided itself on its diverse hiring and multicultural assistance, meaning most people wouldn't be able to converse in so many languages.

She spoke in well over 10 languages- all ones Damian was fluent in, as well.

What a coincidence.

Word about the French angel spread fast through the building, as Damian heard whispers following his steps. At one point, a group of employees came up to him to ask about the French girl, wondering if the rumors were true.

Most of them were, but he was on a mission so he didn't spend much (if any) time dealing with the people. When he found an empty meeting room without anything booked for the next hour, he called one of the best people he knew to get to the bottom of this, as much as he hated admitting it.

"Hello?"

"Drake. I need a favor."

.

.

Lunch went by without major incident- besides Lila claiming a 'Dimitri Wayne' was her soulmate and childhood friend.

Marinette inwardly scoffed, knowing that Damian had been living with his mother until he turned double digits, and that he spent a year or two getting used to Gotham before ever announcing his existence to the world. Even then, no one is even completely sure what he looks like, let alone his friends, and those who actually knew him would be sworn to secrecy by the Waynes. Again, though, she realized how little power she had to change her classmates' views on the Italian and her tall tales. Marinette's instincts told her of someone approaching from behind, and she whirled around on her heel without much thought, pausing as she saw the tour guide walking up to the group. "Okay, lunch's over! Let's get this show on the road, hm?"

Her class quickly gathered around the tall man, ready to continue the tour. Marinette, like usual, was in the back of the group, sketchbook out and pencil flying across the page.

"You're very skilled at drawing."

She didn't jump or whirl around, having heard the approaching footsteps and slight muttering a while ago. "Thank you, but I still have a long way to go." She quickly wrapped up the rough sketch, then closed the book, sending a bright smile at the boy. "And thank you for speaking in my defence this morning."

"Think nothing of it." The teen waved his hand dissmissively, eyes trailing back to the front for a moment.

"Still. My name's Marinette, by the way. Marinette Dupen-Cheng."

"Damian," he said, nodding. "It's a pleasure to meet you."

"Likewise!" She smiled once again, her shoulders a little more lifted than what they were before. "So, how long have you worked at WE?"

They talked amongst themselves for the remainder of the tour, Damian pointing out and explaining more than the guide for most of the tour. And when there wasn't anything educational to talk about, they spoke a little of themselves, getting to know the person beside them a little better. Damian also asked more about the situation in Paris, earning a sad look from the girl beside him and quite a bit of new information. All too soon, though, the tour ended. Over the course of their conversations, Damian learned that that morning wasn't the first time Marinette had been left behind, and quickly deduced that it wouldn't be the last with the children called her classmates. So, when the time to part came, he offered an alternative course of action.

"Gotham can be a beautiful city. Why don't I show you a few inspiring scenic places?" Marinette blinked at the teen, but smiled.

"Let me ask Madame real quick- I'm sure she won't mind too much."

[msjr0119]

The Unexpected Roommate

Part 2

What happens when your roommate of many years falls in love and moves out unexpectedly? Drake Walker was in this situation, until his friends fiancée suggested that her friend moved in to replace her fiancé. The new roommate is causing tension already. Will they be able to survive living together? What’s the worse that could happen?

Drake x Riley

Leo x Olivia

Warnings: Swearing, tension, smut.

Tags- as always if you want to be removed please do let me know. I won’t be offended.

@pedudley @kacie-0156 @loveellamae @annekebbphotography @burnsoslow @ladyangel70 @kingliam2019 @bascmve01 @drakewalker04 @drxkewalker @kozabaji @texaskitten30 @i-bloody-love-drake-walker @kimmiedoo5 @nikkis1983 @gnatbrain @walker7519 @lodberg @cmestrella @hopefulmoonobject @addictedtodrakefanfic @liamxs-world @rafasgirl23415 @notoriouscs @yukinagato2012 @cordonianroyalty @custaroonie @rainbowsinthestorm @desireepow-1986 @queenjilian @bebepac @drakewalkerisreal

Catch up here

******

Riley did the great escape after awaking from her hungover state- the way Drake had been with her, she had even contemplated having to jump out of the window to avoid him. Even the thought of risking breaking a limb would be better than socialising with him. Arriving at work, the smell of alcohol added to the nausea. Sighing, the sooner she had finished her shift- the sooner she could return to her bed and nurse the lingering hangover.

“Good afternoon sweetie, I thought I looked bad.”

“Love you too, Dan.” Shrugging her shoulders, she put on her uniform- Daniel had painkillers waiting for her, knowing what sort of state she would be in. Feeling grateful, she did wonder why- as he had got her into that state in the first place.

*****

Drake had finished his work, barely completing half of the work that he would have done if he was in the office. As angry as he was with Riley, he wasn’t a bastard as she had described him. The mention about ‘dates’ had slightly stabbed him in the heart- he had been on plenty of dates but had never found ‘the one’. Noticing that she had snuck out without saying bye, he decided to have a nosey in her room. At least she’s kept this tidy, he murmured to himself. Going through the drawers, he knew this was crossing the line of boundaries- but he wanted to find something expensive, something that would be on par with her stealing his aftershave. Le Perla underwear. Googling the price tag, he had an idea.

Quickly getting dressed, he wasn’t wearing his usual casual attire of a denim jacket. Deciding to put a smart casual shirt on, along with smart jeans and shoes- tonight was the night that he was going to attempt to pull the hottest girl in New York City.

*****

The shift went surprisingly quick. Daniel had asked if he she would like to go back to his apartment, mainly to re-enact their antics from the previous night - as well as ask how ‘grumpy’ was with her.

“Another night Daniel, I’m going to make amends with Drake if he’s in. If he allows me to. Before I came here, I replaced his aftershave. I’ll grab a pizza, some wine for me and whiskey for the grump.” Daniel shook his head in disbelief that she was willing to give in so easily.

“If he’s a twat, call a cab and I’ll pay. But warn me prior- you know how randy Maxwell can get.” Locking up the bar, she waved to her friend. Determined to try and make things work between herself and Drake for the sake of both of their sanities.

“Dan?” She shouted, before he rushed off down the street out of her view.

“Yeah?”

“Do you fancy going for a couple of drinks?” Changing her mind, she would do anything to avoid rushing home.

****

Drake made his way to not a dive bar, but a bar that had some slight of class. The atmosphere was crowded; he noticed many friendship groups as well as couples, possibly on a date- as he assumed. It was just a normal day for him compared to the people surrounding him- a dull day. A dull few days if he was honest with himself, Riley had been in his life a millisecond and was already making it hell. Feeling petty, all he wanted to do was get laid by a hot stranger- take her home, if it slightly annoyed Riley he believed that the mission was complete.

Scrutinising the area, he glanced at many women- however none had looked his way, apart from the brunette waitress who every so often had walked passed him collecting glasses.

“Hey, handsome.” Not my usual type, but she will do. Revenge on Riley, begins now. The blonde slid next to him, with her martini. Providing him with those ‘fuck me’ eyes, she bit the Olive off of the cocktail stick in a seductive way.

“Hey, beautiful. Do you want a drink?” The blonde smirked at him, resting her hand on his thigh. He ordered shots as well as the drink that she had asked for.

“So, your place or mine handsome?”

“Mine. Definitely mine.” Not wanting to sound desperate, he needed her to go back to his. If she was to reject this offer, the hours he had spent on his own in the bar would have pointless.

****

Arriving back at the apartment, the woman pushed him on to the couch and immediately straddled him. During the time at the bar, he had found her to be slightly boring- self centred. Most men such as Leo would fuck her there and then, but Drake as much as he wanted revenge on Riley he felt guilty. There were doubts whether he should carry on or not.

“How about we watch a movie?” He suggested. “How old are we, five?”

“Listen, Madeleine. I’d love to do more, but we’ve both been drinking. Sober up first, then we can do more.” Keep her sweet.

“You’re lucky that I’m here in this hovel. You are below my standards. Why won’t you just fuck me?” Hovel? Below your standards? I don’t fuck blondes, I prefer brunettes- I’m using you, you bimbo. Hearing the door open, he didn’t realise that it was that time already.

“Oh, baby. I’m going to fuck you so hard tonight.” Madeleine was confused with his sudden change of attitude- turning her head towards the door, she saw Riley. Not giving two fucks about having an audience he forced a kiss upon her cherry flavoured lips- it was demanding, and he was filling her mouth. Their tongues curled against each other.

“Shit. I’m sorry, I didn’t know that you had a guest. I’ll just go to my room.” Looking at the two of them, she felt a pang of jealousy. Not knowing why, she wasn’t in a relationship with Drake. They had a mutual agreement that they hated each other. Why wouldn’t he pull? He looks more handsome when he makes an effort.

“Good!” Drake snapped, before placing sloppy kisses onto Madeleine.

“Oh babe, I hope that you’re on contraception. You know, he’s had that many girls here recently- he’s ran out of condoms.” Madeleine broke the kiss. Seeing Riley smile at her then shrug her shoulders- the blonde wondered what was going on between Drake and Riley.

“She’s lying. She’s the one that has used them all- she’s just jealous because she wants my cock... but don’t worry baby- my cock is for you tonight.” Madeleine licked her lips, as he said this. Wishing that the gooseberry would disappear- she thrust up against his erection as she kissed his neck seductively.

“Drake, if I wanted your little wiener- I would have it. Enjoy your night you two!”

****

Riley laid in bed twiddling her thumbs, Drake had been fucking the blonde around the kitchen for a good twenty minutes or so. She knew that this was real unlike her prank, she was more annoyed that he had broken his own rule. He never asked her permission, neither did she- but that wasn’t the point. He had gone against his own rule, and she was frustrated due to this. Knowing that the two of them were distracted - she gathered a few of her belongings and snuck into Drake’s room.

“Perfect.” She giggled to herself. Sneaking back into her room, she put her headphones in- hoping to block the echoing noises out.

Now go stand in the corner and think about what you did

Ha, time for a little revenge 🎵

****

“How about we take this to my room? Do you think you could handle it more?” Eurghhh god, please say no. I think I’ve got my revenge now.

“You do realise that I’m using you? Just for sex?”

“Same. I don’t even like blondes. I’m imagining that you’re something but blonde.”

“Oh, how nice of you to tell me. I keep imagining that you’re a millionaire- it’s a good job that you have a big cock because if not it wouldn’t be worth my time!”

Walking towards his room, Madeleine reached into her purse- pulling out another condom. Drake provided her with a fake smirk.

“What’s the smirk for? If a certain imbecile had condoms, I wouldn’t need to use all of mine.” Providing him with a serious tone of voice, he wasn’t sure if he could be bothered continuing the night with her.

Opening the door, he was grateful that he had kept his room tidy for this unexpected one night stand. Even though it was revenge, he didn’t think he would actually succeed in pulling it off. In the back of his mind, there was still a slight percentage of guilt.

“What the fuck?”

“All of this isn’t mine....I swear.” Fucking Riley. Even though he was embarrassed with the state of his room, in a way he was grateful- he couldn’t fuck Madeleine anymore. Her sex drive was too high for someone who was clearly not her type.

“This is such a turn off. See ya around, Damien.”

“It’s Drake.”

“Whatever. Enjoy cuddling Hello Kitty.” Picking up all the teddy’s that Riley had neatly arranged in his room- as well as the random Barbies in between, he dumped them outside of her room. She’s good, damn. When will she give me a break?

****

The morning after, Drake was up before Riley- making some coffee, he poured the hot liquid into two mugs.

“Hey, there’s a coffee there for you. Thanks for redecorating my room by the way. How did you know that I loved Barbie and Hello Kitty? Oh, and the teddy bears- that was such a sweet idea. However, I smell a big fat fail....” Ignoring him, she was frantically looking for her favourite bra. Slamming the washing machine, she was frustrated beyond words. She knew that she brought it with her when she had moved in.

“What’s up with you?”

“Have you seen a red and black bra? It’s like my favourite bra, and it was so expensive. I can’t find it anywhere.”

“Oh yeah. You know that blonde? I kind of ripped her bra off, I broke it. I was that eager to suck on her tits. So when she left, I gave her yours. You won’t mind though, because it’s only a bra.”

“It’s fucking La Perla! How could you do that to me? Do you know the price tag of their underwear?”

“Do you know the price tag of Tom Ford aftershave?”

“Yeah, the aftershave that I replaced before I went to work yesterday. As well as buying some whiskey for you. I wanted to make amends.” Looking down towards the floor, she made her way back to her room. A moment later, she returned with the items that she had bought him.

“Here. I’m going to get ready to go out for the day.”

“I just wanted a bit of payback. Thank you for replacing my aftershave. I hope the pranks were worth it, but you also need to replace some other items. Not the condoms though. I can live without them. Unless you need them?” Knowing that he was referring to the items from the bathroom, she had a little giggle to herself. Thinking about her and Daniel doing that, she knew now was the time to come clean about her friends true identity.

“Drake, the guy that came over....”

“Daniel.” He snapped back, knowing full well what his name was- he couldn’t ignore her moaning his name.

“Yes, Daniel. We didn’t have sex, it was fake. We didn’t even touch each other. He’s gay. I wouldn’t disrespect my roommate like that. I’m a prankster. I’m sorry for being a bitch. I’ll find you a cheaper bra that you can give away if she comes back.” He’s gay. What the fuck? They are both good actors. Fuck. I did the ‘same’. I disrespected her.

“I’m glad that he’s gay...” shit why have I said that? “ I had sex with her to get revenge on you and Daniel. But it’s not revenge. Because you didn’t do that. I’m so sorry. She’s not my type, and I don’t think that I was hers. I couldn’t wait to pull out. It meant nothing, if anything it was torture.” Nervously laughing, he felt bad that he had done the deed and that she didn’t. Riley didn’t want to hear his excuses, they weren’t friends- they were roommates. If he wanted to be in a relationship, or have one night stands she wouldn’t be a burden. She had no right to be.

“Don’t worry I’ll replace them. Size small. See you later.”

“Riley! I need extra large. Thanks.” Rolling her eyes back, she shook her head.

“I’ve seen plenty of cocks in my life. All men exaggerate the size of it. I’ll get you medium- as a compromise.”

*****

Riley had spent the day catching up with a few old friends; having a stroll around Central Park, grabbing some lunch and doing some retail therapy. Doing this made her feel relaxed, and grateful that she had such amazing friends. Later on that night, she had arranged to meet Daniel for a few drinks as they were both off work. It was unusual for the two of them to be off on the same night, so they were going to take full advantage. Walking through the apartment, she cursed herself for forgetting to pick up some condoms as she had promised Drake. Hearing the door open, Drake turned the tv off and jumped up from the sofa.

“Hey!” He shouted enthusiastically. Riley backed away from him slightly, wondering if he had a twin brother- a nice person.

“Erm. Hi, what’s up with you? No insult?” Taking her high heels off, her feet were throbbing- she was still waiting for Drake to elaborate as to why he was showing a bit of niceness towards her. It won’t last long, she thought to herself. Sitting down on the couch, she massaged her feet, if she knew that Lola and Beth wanted to walk around Central Park, she would have worn more sensible footwear.

“I’ve been thinking about what you said earlier - about making amends. I actually wrote you a letter....”

“You did?”

“Yeah, except I lost it. Then I found it and you pissed me off so I screwed it up and put it in the trash.” Nodding, she really wasn’t acknowledging what he wanted to say.

“Don’t you want to know what I wrote in the letter?” Can I tell her the truth? Come on Drake, just tell her.

“I can already guess.... ‘Dear, Riley. I hate you. The end.’ The feelings mutual Drake. But I’ll be civil until you can find another roommate.”

“Yeah that’s what it said.” Lying, he didn’t want to tell her the truth after her sarcastic response. The truth also including that he couldn’t stop thinking about her. “Until I find another roommate?” He questioned, looking confused.

“Yeah. Leo and Liv said they was desperate to find someone to live with you so that Leo didn’t have to pay rent. Pretty selfish of them, I’d say. My old roommate had decided to move out of the city, I couldn’t afford the rent on my own. I was just going to move in with Daniel and his boyfriend Maxwell until I found somewhere. So, here I am. Until you find someone. Someone that you actually like.”

“I see.” Not really knowing what else to say, he didn’t want to hate her. He wanted to get to know her more. Possibly more than roommates. “Shall we start over? Watch some tv? Have a few drinks and a take out?” Asking nervously, he didn’t know how she would react to his suggestion. Wishing he had the balls to suggest his original plan that he had wrote down in the letter- he just couldn’t do it.

“Thanks but no thanks.”

“Would this change your mind?” Riley opened the bag, inside there was her ‘missing’ bra- as well as another set. Her heart sunk, now knowing that his words were sincere. Now realising that maybe, he could have had a long thought about the way he had acted towards her. Drake wasn’t the only guilty party in this, she knew that she wasn’t exactly an angel. Believing that she would have forgiven him for just returning her bra, she was unsure as to why he had treat her to an extra present.

“I lied, I didn’t give your bra away. I’m not a bastard, Riley. If you don’t like the other bra and the erm.....” Seeing him become flustered, not able to discuss the item in the bag- she bit her lip attempting to not laugh. In the back of her mind she wondered how he got on actually purchasing the items.

“Thong...”

“Yeah that... the receipt is in the bag. You can take it back. I won’t be offended. I meant what I said, I want to make amends. To be honest, I’m fed up of your shit. So. Shall we start over?”

“Sure, I’d love to.”

[neirawrites]

I was a Twihard in high school. Then I was a Twilight hater. In  2018, I decided to reread the first book, to see for myself on which side I belonged. I wrote my thoughts as I read, in multiple parts, but on my main blog, so I thought I might share them on my writeblr too, because I kinda had fun with it. 

Enjoy��my many, many notes

Pages 0-50

I’m actually kinda into it. Yeah, there are a many issues every article on editing tells you to fix (filter words, -ing verbs and things like that), but i feel it. I don’t know what it is, but it’s there.

Bella isn’t that bad of a protagonist. Nothing too spectacular, but she’s fine. She is depressed, self sacrificing and hides her feelings, but also a lot more self aware than i though she would be(like when she notices mike, my son, likes her). She’s a typical teenage girl, the introverted type, way into reading. there’s nothing wrong with that.

I don’t know why i remember Edward being a draco in leather pants,but he’s also fine for now. mysterious and handsome and a bit weird. The first real conversation they have, he’s polite and nice and charming. I expected him to be a dick for like 150 pages at least.

Pages 50-100

I’m still really into it.

Yeah,Edward kinda ghosts her/gaslights her after the whole van incident, but with the benefit of hindsight,i kinda get it. It’s a wonder he didn’t pick up his entire family and moved to Alaska again. I also get her mood during that time and I've been there so i feel ya,Bella,it’s not your fault.

And yeah, Bella gets invited to the dance by three different guys and it’s all kinds of fan fic-y, but the fact she turns them down furthers my belief she’s wake up married to Edward in like a few years and realize she would rather be with Rosalie (a solid choice, might i add).

Edward’s really pushy, especially when it comes to the scene after she faints. like, let her go, you jerk, she can drive herself, but he’s more weird than he’s a jerk and i think that was intentional.

A big surprise was the line “what if i’m not the hero, what if i’m the bad guy?” which isn’t this super cheesy, extra dramatic sentence but a jokey joke told with a laugh. actually, that whole conversation in the cafeteria where she tries to guess what he is is gold and don’t try to tell me otherwise.

I’m reading her interests in him as less of a romantic thing, and more of frustration at his behavior,like she would still be fascinated by him if he wasn’t so hot because he’s just so weird (but being hot is definitely a plus).

Plot? What plot?

Still, while the flaws are there, i’m still enjoying it very much.

Pages 100-150

Is Stephanie Meyer into anime? Cuz she wrote a harem light novel,that’s what she did and that’s how i’ll read it from now on and have more fun doing it. (Might make a post elaborating on this further).

All this to say that we got to Jacob. Not gonna lie, I kinda forgot about him.  He seems like a nice kid and i’m glad Bella has some positive interaction. Team jacoj 4 life (jk,man,i was team jasper in high school which is in retrospect very weird of me). I know he becomes a friend-zoned dudebro later, but for now, he’s fine.

Meyer, lady, you’re winning me over as a half hearted defender of your work, but why are the girls so bitchy? Yeah,i know, bitchy girls exist in real life, especially in high schools,but girls are our friends and we need more positive female on female interactions. Just my personal preference, I guess.

Things are getting interesting. Bella’s dreaming weird dreams (just fyi, not a big fan of dream scenes in general), she’s googling like crazy  and we’re going to Port Angeles.

I never felt she has any sort of affection for Angela or Jessica who seem really nice and have done nothing wrong. Like loosen up Bella, give them a chance. I know, depression makes you into a bitch sometimes, but it would warm me up to her character if she was a little more affectionate with people around her.

That whole scene where she almost gets at best beaten up and mugged and at worst raped and killed is… not my favorite part of the whole thing. I get what Meyer needed to do, to have her be saved by Edward, but there must have been a better way to go about it. What do I know? I’m the queen of forced plot contrivances. I do like their conversation at the restaurant (again, why do we hate the female waitress, Steph?). I don’t know why, I expected Edward to be mad at Bella for what happened to her and he seems genuinely concerned and his anger feels… human. Some of his actions, however, do not.

He stalked her which is weird and creepy and I hate it. Don’t stalk people, Edward. most of us don’t like it. you’re lucky Bella’s a weirdo.

150-200

I kinda love how ok she’s with the whole vampire thing. she’s just “well, this kid i barely know told me a scary story, so i guess the guy from school is a vampire. it be like that sometimes.” my first assumption would be it’s all an elaborate prank to make fun of me (i have some deep seeded trust issues origins of which remain unknown). and he’s waaay to quick to confirm her suspicions. I think there’s an explanation in the part of midnight sun that got leaked, but that was like a century ago.

I would criticize her for being ride or die with Edward so fast, falling in love with him so quickly, but i exchanged like 5 sentences with a cute girl last night and a part of is ready to propose based on the artiness of her instagam, so who the eff am i to judge?

and i get why he’s fascinated with her. she’s the only one he can’t read.

why? i don’t think that question ever gets a good enough answer, but it’s a fictional story about a girl falling in love with a sparky vampire. i’m not here for complex science or detailed explanations.

he seems waaay too protective of her. She’s a big girl, Ed, she can take care of herself. It’s actually kinda annoying. i dislike how he treats like a child a lot of the time. he seems pretty condescending. also, if he broke her car, i’m taking back everything nice i said about him.

ok, let me finally address bella’s biggest character flaw, her clumsiness. i mean, i get why she has it but Meyer goes a bit too hard on it. i’m clumsy, i really am, full of bruises, always bumping into things, but Bella can’t walk 20 meters without tripping. i guess i’m just glad she becomes a vampire in the book four, otherwise the book five would have been about her struggles when she’s diagnosed with a stage four inoperable brain tumor that’s been mesing with her sense of balance and the whole things turns into a weird version of the fault in our starts.

if i were writing it i would focus on her trust issues and being unable to form real bonds with other people as her main flaw, maybe even use it to try and justify the whole thing with the mind Edward can’t read. Like, she’s too different in a way that makes her unable to connect even on a basic level, like that one Blue whale that sings at a different frequency than all the others. Idk,i write pulpy sci fi. but it’s easy to be a general after the battle.

we got to the two infamous lines:

how are you? 17. how long have you been 17?  is another line that’s more jokey than i though it would be, but also the most realistic piece of dialogue in this book. i would so ask the same thing.

About three things I was absolutely positive. First, this paragraph has been memed to death. Second, there was a part of me-and I didn’t know how potent that part might be-that would know every word of it till the day i died. And third, I was unconditionally and irrevocably in like with it.

200-300

Not gonna lie, the whole part where he goes around asking her questions he is legitimately interested in knowing the answers to is at the same time my kinkiest fantasy and my deepest fear. like, yaaas, daddy, get to know me on the personal level and don’t be turn off by the fact i’m a tabula rasa.

We got to the infamous meadow scene and Bella is sooo horny on main for that vampire stake it’s actually kinda funny. She gets so effing into it she faints. I fucking love this girl. Go get that adonis dick, Bella, you deserve it.

I don’t mind vampires sparkle.i mean,it’s lame and fanfic-y but in Bosnia we have the lampires so vampires are creatures with a high dose of plasticity. i don’t know why that was like the worst thing anyone has ever done to the vampires. They are kinda too strong and could use a real weakness tho.  

So the lion fell in love with the lamb is kind of another joke. Also, this is the skin of a killer is sadly just in the movie.

I do have the feeling he likes the project that he sees in Bella more than the real girl,but ok. Also stop nagging her. He watches her sleep. What a creep. I don’t know why, but the fact that he’s a vampire who doesn’t have to sleep makes it kinda less creepy for me. I don’t know why.

But “if i could dream at all i would be about you,” is the kind of ultracheese i can get behind. they are both such teenagers and i kinda looooove it.

Also non of the boys were her type is such a lesbian excuse. I feel ya Bella, i feel ya. I hope you discover your gayness after the end of breaking dawn.

We meet the cullens and every single one of them has a backstory like 528 times more interesting than Edward. i need novels about them, all of them ffs. it would be so cool. but, one of my favorite oc’s Errien Lark gets like 30 lines in the whole book so i can only be as harsh on Meyer as on myself (which is to say a lot. neither of us deserve these characters, honestly)

This book would have been more interesting if Bella fell in love in any other cullen. Like, Bella and Alice, Bella and jasper (Bella and Jasper and Alice. Sorry, i’m into solving love triangles with ot3s).Bella and Rosalie, Calilise, Esme, even Emmett, who i remember  as mike of the vampires, but it’s been a decade.

300 pages in and plot is yet to happen, but it’s ok. we have the vampire baseball next.

the last part.

get your hot takes! hot takes right here

I kinda like billy. He seems like a nice guy. Also billy/charlie as my new otp.

“The beautiful one,the godlike one.” Bella, you are such a teen.

The less fucks she has about him being an all powerful ancient creature of the night who can murder her in a heartbeat, the funnier it is. She is just soo casual about it. Comedy gold, i tell ya. i mean, this is actually part of the narrative, Edward comments on it, meyer knows what she wrote.

Ed,maybe is you stopped saying she smells good, you would be better at not thinking about her as food. Mind over matter. Just a thought. Maybe i misjudged his virgin ass. Maybe ed the incel actually fell in love with her. Or at least what he thinks is love since they’ve been dating for like two days (look who’s talking?the girl who reads any sign of affection as a statement of love and then gets disappointed).

“Emmett could never be compared to a gazelle”. That’s sexist steph. Emmett, honey, you are as gracious as you want to be.

Also a big yaaaas on the whole concept of vampire baseball. we needed more of it.

Plot! Plot! Plot! Plot! Plot!

We have encountered plot. Only 320 pages in. three bad vampires came into town.

Story time: when i was in high school, all like 20 of us in out class were really, really into twilight (dudes included). we quoted it all the time but the height of comedy happened when someone brought their friend from another school to out class and someone else was like “you brought a snack” and a meme was born to be quoted endlessly for months. it was actually kinda fun. and probably very annoying for anyone who wasn’t into twilight.

Also, any development? Backstory? Motivations other than for the hell of it for out boi James and his ginger girlfriend? come on, it wouldn’t even be that hard. Also, some foreshadowing? There was like one line before. This is a legitimate criticism. it’s kinda shitty writing and a wasted opportunity.

Edward is being a dick again. I get he’s scared but her dad could die. Or maybe they’ll trun him into a vampire too (charlie/Edward? Think about it). But they all call him out on it which is nice. Bella’s plan isn’t bad, but “let me go charlie” is the straight up coldest thing i have read in a long time. it’s supposed to be, this isn’t criticism, just stating the obvious. But she showed like an inclining of love for her dad who has been nothing but nice all this time. Yeeey, she’s not a robot.

“It was the best idea. Of course it was mine” . Yaas, queen, you’re not that much of a doormat;  take that credit.

i would do something to foreshadow the ballet studio thing in the first half of the book. at least, have Bella or Charlie looking at pictures from her recital, just to intricate it to the plot a bit more.

Ok, now i remember why i was team jasper. He is so effing nice. And he would be awesome for my depression. Neira/Alice/jasper, i ship it.

i’m kinda digging the explanations of how vampires work and the whole venom thing. They are still op af and need to be nerfed, but i wanna be one.

Of course, he used the mom. She’s like the only person bella actually cares about. She falls for it. i would probably fall too, but i’m dumb.

the fact that james hunted Alice is a nice and a very much needed twist. it did catch me of guard. i would be more mad he’s a bad guy monologing, but i can only introduce stones to my own glass houses.

Bella’s now more into the idea of being a vampire than into Edward and i’m living for it. she’s going to use him for his venom and a baby and run off with rosalie.

“and how many times did she fall our of a window?” (yes, that is a Sherlock reference in the year 2018 of our lord. maybe i should do that for my next project. should i wait a few more years?)

her mom is not worried enough, honestly. my mom would be freaking out. but my mom has anxiety issues, so idk… (i couldn’t get her smooth hairless legs, or her blue eyes but i got that gene. thanks, i guess) .

“And i have a couple of girlfriends” now that’s a novel i want to read but i guess i’ll have to write the lesbian twilight myself.

“I want to be superman too”. yeeees, finally, kristen steward in the role of superman casting of the century. you would all watch it and love it, and you know it.

Charlie doesn’t deserve this shit. when will he retire with his husband billy in their cabin where they can fish all day.

“Do you want me to bolt the door so you can massacre the unsuspecting townsfolk?“ Are we sure she hasn’t been a vampire from day one?

Jacob is a sweetie (for now) just putting that out there.

Edward is kinda being unreasonable. being a vampire in your universe isn’t that bad.

Aaaaw, and that’s a wrap.

i actually kinda digged it. it’s nothing special, but i read these last 150 pages in one sitting. my main issues are writing oriented. very little foreshadowing, many filter words and things like that, but i guess if you aren’t that into writing, you might not even notice more of that.

it’s not the death of literature, it’s not the worst love story ever told. it’s just a silly and mostly harmless wish fulfillment novel.

edward can be a controlling and condescending prick but he gets called out on it very often. it’s not like meyer is completely oblivious to what she’s writing. and even tho he’s 100, i guess they are all mostly stuck mentally at the age when they were turned. or at least that’s how it seems to me. bella is kind of a bitch to everyone who’s not a vampire and she’s never called out on it, there’s a glimpse of change in the epilogue, but i don’t think meyer really considered it a character flaw. which is a shame, as it could have made for an interesting character. all the vampires have stories i would rather read about, as i said before, but what can ya do? that’s what’s fanfics are for.

i may write more of cohesive thought on it when it settles in my brain, but first, i need to watch the movie. i have a hypothesis i need to test.

but i don’t regret doing this. it was kinda fun and now i’m no longer ashamed of my twihard phrase. i could have done worse, as far as teen phases go.

Someone should like write a fanfic, but Edward is not a vampire, but a rich guy. And he’s into some hard core spanky business. And they should take all the problematic elements and just crank them up to 11. And add a looot of sex. I bet they could make millions.

Tho, honestly, how can you read twilight and not make bella the kinky dom? you fundamentally misunderstood the story. for shame

[szopenhauer]

Are you the type of person who gets straight to the point?: I try my best to explain things but ppl still don’t understand the obvious

What was the last thing you said in complete caps?: not sure what was last

Do you enjoy playing board games?: some

Did you wear anything new today?: pineapple shirt my mom bought for me recently

Do you ever eavesdrop on people’s conversations?: hard not to when they’re so loud

Are you good at playing Hide and Go Seek?: I was because I’m tiny XD

Who or what made you smile last?: my thoughts 

What was the last song you had on repeat?: Daisy by Ashnikko :x

Do you often have that song on repeat?: no that was one time only lol  I hardly ever have a son on repeat, that happened like 5 times in my entire life, usually after breakup

Silly string or confetti?: fun but too messy and waste of money so none

How long is your favorite song?: about 3.50

What was the highlight of your day today?: it’s complicated

Do you tap your foot when you listen to music?: I tap but mostly due to anxiety ^^”

Would you rather use tape or glue?: tape 

Homemade or store bought cards?: store bought 

Do you listen to any hip hop?: nah

How about some lyrics?: I'm tired of weakness Tired of my feet of clay I'm tired of days to come I'm tired of yesterday And all the worn out things that I ever said Now it's much too late The words stay in my head (...) I'm tired of Facebook Tired of my failing health I'm tired of everyone And that includes myself Well being alone now It doesn't bother me But not knowing if you are That's been hell you see 

Have you ever had a fascination with stickers? slightly

Have you ever seen A Walk To Remember? yeah Did you ever watch Captain Planet? I did Do you think that Uggs are ugly? I love them Have you ever watched That ‘70’s show? meh Do you get along with your sibling’s friends? we don’t know each other Do you have a fashion icon? sorta, not really Do you think that iCarly is annoying? possibly

Have you ever had a really bad haircut? sadly

What are your favorite type of calendars? pocket?  Could you spend hours on pinterest? just a couple of minutes  Have you ever had to wear a school uniform? I liked that Who were your best friends in high school? K.K. E.E. E.W. Ż.B.

Would you rather sleep on the top bunk or bottom bunk? bottom Have you ever had a secret admirer that left you notes? I got a note in elementary, it’s a mystery to this day, I thought that it’s a response from M.N. after I left him one myself but it seemed to be a prank done by girls who’ve been bullying me so I threw that piece of paper angrily at him like it was his fault - I still kinda remember what was written on it, they called me a flower and left a tiny drawing - later, forgot how, I found that note again and I believe I might still have it stored somewhere  What was your favorite thing to do at sleepovers when you were younger? as a kid I had 1 sleepover (same school in which the note situation happened) my friend P.W. had puppies and I was allowed to stay for the night in her house Do you currently live in the city you grew up in? mhm What’s one way in which you’re behind the times? ex. getting a job  What’s one way in which you’re still a child? ex. collecting stuffed animals, lots What’s one way in which you’re old? ex. health issues Do you feel old or young? Or do you feel both at different times? both at different times What would be the best surprise you could receive right now? money? Do you usually forgive when someone hurts your or try to get revenge? neither, I hold grudge and don’t trust the person again, at least for a long time  Were there any subjects in school that were really easy for you? in primary most of them were, in middle school: polish, biology, chemistry and math and in high: russian, english, PE and physics (but I probably shouldn’t count it as we had it for a few months) Did you ever skip a grade or get held back a grade? - What time of day were you born? half past midnight, my mother asked me why I’m so lazy as for someone who was born on Saturday and I responded with - I was sleeping in and was late for Friday What is the best hairstyle you’ve ever had? can’t choose Do you think you look better with dyed hair or natural hair? I’m used to my color but I wouldn’t mind dyed hair Do you ever listen to Celtic music? me and John had a phase on that back in the day, I wish I remind the titles... Have you ever wanted to be a model, actress, singer, or dancer? actress When you look at your baby pictures, do you recognize yourself? pfft Has your hair color changed since you were a toddler? got darker, less red  Do you wear matching socks? always but recently I thought about changing that fact Do you have a seashell collection? Do you have a rock collection? small Flamingos or pineapples? both Cacti or seashells? same but it’s harder to take care of cacti than shells haha Maple tree or palm tree? palm, ppl say maple looks like weed - I don’t think this way but that’s annoying, still I’d prefer maple trees irl!  Dreamcatcher or wind chimes? wind chimes but not every kind Have you ever taken a picture at the perfect moment? <3

Are you a pyromaniac? Bu is :P Are you a kleptomaniac? wtf Do you like to wear belts? it’s uncomfy and not good for my belly Would you ever get dreadlocks? I could but I won’t Do you listen to Eminem? no way

Does your sibling have a significant other? my sister is married 

When and why is the last time you cried (or at least, shed tears)? yesterday?

Have you ever cried at a real wedding? not that I been to many but no

What do your flipflops look like? don’t own any

Are there any gadgets of yours that need charging right now? my cellphone is charging

Which awards show would you wanna go to the most (e.g Oscars, Grammys etc.)? I wanna go to MET gala, nothing else

Any idea what time you’ll be going to bed tonight? late

Does your significant other like the same colour as you do? she hates my fav colors besides black 

Have you ever purchased anything online? obvi

Name all your friends whose name starts with the 4th letter of your first name. ...

Have you ever ridden an elephant? I’d like to (and camel and an ostrich and a horse)

Are you the candle lighting type? am not

Coffee in the morning, yay or nay? nay

Anal sex, yay or nay? hell no

Blue lipstick, yay or nay? okay, whatever

Is this question lame: “Have you had sex?” yep

Have you ever dated someone with really crooked teeth? mine are crooked

Would you rather vacation on the beach, or in the mountains? beach What embarrassing music do you listen to? too embarassed to write down? What’s your biggest talent? talented? me? r u kidding?

If you were a candy bar, what would you be? Milky Way? Would you rather ride in a hot air balloon or hang-glide? air balloon What’s one word you want people to use to describe you? truth is most important, everything else is less 

Did you often read for fun when you were a kid? tons of books

Are you more of a visual learner or an auditory learner? I learn best with my hands (kinesthetic) but visual is probably easier than auditory to me 

Do you have any dietary restrictions? ugh...

Do you prefer Google Maps, Apple Maps, Waze, or something else? I get lost no matter what

How old does someone have to be for you to see them as an adult? about my age or older

Do you ever ‘manspread’ when you sit down? sorry but I don’t sit like a lady - I sit like a lesbian unless there’s no space for that

When was the last time you were in a crowded place, and where was it? bus this day

Have you ever turned down a job offer? had to

What was the last medical appointment you scheduled? scheduled plenty at once

Have you ever had a dream in which you died? I die often, it’s a common element in my dreams, I’m fine with it by now

Have you ever fallen asleep on public transport?  oh well... majority of those times I was able to but once it was an accident and I missed my stop while going to school

Can you touch your toes without bending your knees? almost Have you seen all the Hunger Games films? yasss Why did you last go see a doctor? control visit about my IBS, GERD, food intolerances... Are you more logical or creative? depends

What do you currently hear? parents talking, music - iamamiwhoami; shadowshow 

Did you get enough sleep last night? I slept a little over 3 hours and I feel tired  Are the streetlights on? it’s not dark yet When you wear a hoodie, do you pull the sleeves over your hands? when it’s warm for that or they bother me in what I’m doing Are you in any advanced classes at school? w moim profilu miałam rozszerzone historię i WOK (wiedza o kulturze) Did you have a good day today? it wasn’t the worst (compared) and hope it won’t turn into complete shit 

[renaer-is-allegedly-hot]

actual session 8 notes

• I made a mistake

○ Mistake as in I came in late oops

• Anyways

• They're talking abt hair

• For sneak attack you roll 2d6 just a friendly reminder to yourself

○ oH IT TELLS U IN DNDBEYOND HOW MUCH FOR SNEAK ATTACK OKAY

• Now they're talking abt pranking ppl in the rides

• Now they're talking abt disneyland problems

• Now they're talking abt rollercoasters

• Jacob's fish ate each other

• Ok dnd time

○ "no worries" re: me being late s u r e ok nvm it's not depression time

• Passive perception checks and then we do smth idk

• Last session(s)

○ Downtime and then breakfast was bombed

○ Found out the attack was deliberate

○ Went to the one fancy villa house and got into a few fights

○ A nimblewright ?? Was responsible for the attack ig

○ We dipped and it's rainy

• The city is engulfed in thiccccc fog

○ Walking back to mirt's house

§ Lillian got prankt

• Lillian's sister has a guinea pig

○ Its name is buttercup

○ "buttercup dumpy tho" - jacob, 2020

• We're talking abt china's laws wrt eating dogs

• We're in the fog going to mirt's

○ Mirt's house is in sea ward, we're in north ward (a ward away)

○ If we just walk it's a half mile away

○ But there r streets so like a mile walk

○ Visibility is bad bc spring fog

○ Disadvantage on perception checks, visibility reduced to 30 ft

○ We're walking we get there

• Cel knocks

○ No one answers the door

○ Adam is making an investigation check

§ Does a short tour of the front, nothing out of the ordinary

§ Door is locked

§ Looking into the house there's an occasional candle burning by itself

□ Adam uses thaumaturgy to rapidly change the color of the lights inside to see if he can get anyone's attention

® Lights change color, nothing happens

§ Maybe we'll break in but cel will try the pebble on a window thing first

□ Throws, door opens and floon lets us in

□ Mans just got up

® We're a lil wet

□ It's abt 5am

• Short rest? There's no medium rest

○ I want cake I might make cupcakes after this bc I need cake sugar

§ I'll make cake after this and watch criminal minds bc it had me scream

○ We're taking shifts for keeping watch sleeping in mirt's living room w windows facing out onto the street

○ We're taking a long rest

• When cel is on watch she's just watching the door and windows

• Eventually renaer and floon get up n operate on a normal schedule

• Cut straight to wake up

○ Once we're all up it's raining

○ Hi jacob's dad isn't his name frederic ? Oh god I could b v wrong but I'm p sure bc when marguerite named the squirrel someone was like it's jacob's dad

§ "usually what I say should be cut off" - frederic, 2020

§ Aw bye jacob's dad

§ Jacob sounds exactly like his dad

□ Tb to the one time we were playing split the room on jackbox w my cousins and my dad and the choice was trading ur average newborn for an uber smart one or not and all of the cousins and myself said don't trade and mY DAD SAID TRADE

• It's pouring

• Mirt doesn't seem to b here but we can talk to renaer and floon

○ Gonna talk to them abt the mansion n ppl / things at the mansion

○ Oh a nimblewright is the one thing

§ Oops I accidentally googled it and turns out they're employed as bodyguards / assassins / spies

○ "renAer . Do u recognize this symbol"

§ He is indeed familiar w the crest

§ "well to me this looks like the house of grahlund (idk) ?? Or smth"

§ The houses of waterdeep

§ We're suss abt the book

□ We don't see any other black pages tho

§ Adam says the gnome was unfortunately barbecued

□ "trying to deliver the stone of galore" to us probs

□ Y would he deliver it to us

□ "bc mirt is relatively well known ,, this house is probs well watched"

□ The stone of galore v sought after by noble families apparenTly

□ The house ppl r embezzling that's y they want the rock

□ Had their robot blast our door for it

□ But now city watch probably has it

□ Theo remembers the one elven lady having seen someone run off

□ The zents want it, the nobles want it, the citywatch want it

○ So is the plan to go find a zent ??? Or what we'd learn if we went to the robot's location

§ I don't remember any frickin robot I'm just trying to pick up on context clues

§ Oh right grinda in mistshore ? 

§ We're gonna go find grinda

□ It's like around 4 in the afternoon

□ Sun not shining too brightly

□ Renaer not coming

® Ur leaving groot w renaer this time

□ Neither is floon, mirt mentioned he had to go do some business elsewhere

® Adam is currently suspicious of mirt

□ We need a ride

® We all dish out 3 copper for a taxi

® Dom dabbed and no one cares

○ Can u drop a message to the guy ?? Somehow ?? Somewhere ?? Just like ,, keep him in the loop ???? Ur confused

• Ok we pay

○ Adam is playing the uke

§ We're in the cab 

§ Imagine it's raining aggressively

§ A dwarf guild member picks us up

§ Ugh I want cake

§ Could I bake while playing hm

§ Cab driver has a rigging of sorts set up

§ I have to pee too

§ Any interesting looking ppl in the cab w us ?

○ A gnome w a fedora looking p drenched, dragonborn woman half sleeping kinda elderly, human man

§ Adam slaps the gnome, you stare at the gnome, gnome looks at adam and adam runs an insight check adam rolls 23, gnome tries to look surprised but looks like he's overacting

§ "there's not a lot of big ideas here"

§ "well that's obvious enough"

§ Gnome picks up on stare

§ You get the paper you flip it, you roll for insight gets 22

□ Takes the bait, looks at the paper; eventually human gets off

□ We're getting close to outskirts of dock ward, road is mud

□ At some point the gnome tries to start conversation

□ "say what's that you've got there"

□ "well I only saw him at the carnival that shows up every fall"

® Common in the autumn but not nowadays

® Would have to wait another summer

□ "are you a nimblewright fanatic sir"

® "all I'm saying is I like springtime rain as much as the next guy but when the wind season comes in it's kinda unusual"

® Gnome's name is elbridge

◊ Adam rolls for insight

} 25

} Looks like he's used to saying that name but it might not be his name

® "say I have some business to attend to so driver u can keep the tip just don't tell the guild" dwarf nods and slows the horses down, gnome gets off and dips

• Adam wants him to blow a nose

• "did he leave any little hairs" - marguerite, 2020

○ Cab driver shouts and says no stabbing on the cart

• We're in the dock ward, cart stops and dwarf leans over and makes us get out

○ Shakes his head and says we shouldn't go to mistborne

○ "is there any instruction you can give us for how to 'get there get there' because you're not 'taking us taking us'" - adam, 2020

• Aerana's leading

○ Dom sends a map

○ We're not standing on the muddy running water streets but on wooden planking

○ You have your dagger at hand

○ Beached ships but ppl living inside them probably

○ U can see there r some ppl peeking out of various doorways + shifty characters milling abt

○ Cel and adam r holding hands

○ Adam is sweating a lot but cel still holds it

○ At some point a dragonborn that looks like a sailor or smth w lots of battlewounds n tattoos looks p savage w dull brown color to scales, stands in front of u without saying anything

○ Ur like a lil shorter than humans and dragonborn r much taller

§ "I have business in mistborne what are you doing in my way"

§ Not so many city types

§ Adam mumbles smth under his breath

□ Asks adam what kind of business

□ "we're looking for grinda"

® Tries to appear jovial

® Says ah yes she lives here

® Dragon therapy

◊ He takes and puts to temple 

◊ U pay him 3 gold

◊ Grinda garloff

} Strange woman w a shed at the end of the dock

} Take a left here and follow the sounds of the waves

} Throws out a fourth

– Has many visitors w strange visitors

◊ Cel says she likes his tattoos

} "yes these r when I was sailing around the isle of chault"

• We follow his directions and eventually get to d1, we see ppl trying to set a fire

○ Walk down the dock towards d2, door to north of d2 has small assemblage of ppl

○ Can see up to 60 ft away some odd looking ppl

§ Four thugs bearing weapons; three humans w a dwarf barking instructions, attempting to break down the door to d2

§ Might b grinda's house but we really don't know

§ Adam spruces up the one fire of the dock workers

□ Cel lets go of adam's hand

□ They don't notice adam did it

• Adam tries to hear what the dwarf is saying bc it's rainy and doesn't hear anything

○ Lots of shifty ppl around

○ Some of them r watching the scene and also us

○ We approach the audience

§ Adam nudges the friendliest looking person

§ We all go up onto the elevated ship

§ Immediately ppl look at us suss

□ Confrontational almost and eventually a half-elf woman asks us if we're here to watch them string up grinda

® Cel makes persuasion check

® Isn't there another door ?

® Adam goes to cushiest looking person and asks y they're after grinda

◊ Old grizzled halfling answers adam and says grinda took smth she wasn't supposed to have

◊ "we're here to make sure that grinda doesn't escape unharmed"

◊ "we're pretty tough as well" adam says

◊ More ppl come over closer to us

◊ Adam asking how much it would be to outbuy

◊ "that depends on how much you're asking oh wrinkly one"

◊ Halfling confers w fellows

◊ Halfling appears to be a ringleader

} Says 15 dragons

– 19 for insight

w Confident guy, lived a tough life

w Ppl put their trust in him

w Halfling says 15 is bargain price

w Unsuccessful try to push the price down you all cough up 3 dragons

– They start distributing dragons

w Not used to containing excitement

○ After distributing money asks if we have a bone to pick with the xants

§ Adam's gonna play them a song and plays it so hard it casts shatter on the dock the thugs are standing on

□ Constitution saving throws for everything

® Two of the bandits and the dwarf fail their saving throws, other two succeed

® Tl;dr the dock - two of them r shocked so hard they're either dead or unconscious

® Dwarf Is particularly affected

® Dock they're standing on collapses

® Door blasted off inwards

◊ "that's a little trick I learned at bard school"

◊ Ppl on the boat have moved away

® Humans and dwarves screaming

◊ 3 left

} We're not killing them just going into the house

} Go to the side entrance

– V small room w all bare necessary fixtures

– Strange safes n intricate bolted locks

– Hanging talismans from the roof

– Nvm went too fast

w Aerana jumps and runs into a wall but you run into a cabinet

w 3 damage

w Human woman looks unconscious

w Adam casts healing word

w Resuscitates her

w Has mismatched eyes, one yellow other dark green

w V gray hair

w Doesn't look particularly old just has gray hair

w Startles when she wakes up trying to assess our intentions

w Adam tries to convince her the thugs outside tried to blow up her door

w 18 for deception

w Lie works

w "who are you people?"

® Theo asks if she knows anything abt this *pulls out paper*

◊ Affirms we're not w the xants

◊ "I appreciate what you did my name's grinda"

◊ Doesn't look used to talking to this many ppl at once

◊ Stands up and busies herself w putting the room back in order

◊ Looks like she had been barricading the door w stuff before everything was knocked over

◊ "you're telling me you just happened across this place and drove off some xants for some odd purpose"

◊ "actually we were looking for you" - theo

◊ Were told she might have smth to do w the paper

◊ "all the homies hate xanathar" - adam, 2020

} "I've had my dealings w the xanathar before…" admits she was in over her head

} Looking at the paper "so this nimblewright was instructed to drop off an artifact I was supposed to hold for the xanathars

} She got greedy bc she's a treasure-seeker

} The artifact is worth a lot

} "it's just what we do lady" - adam, 2020

} Adam is gonna charm her

– Adam tries to flex "what exactly what was the dangerous item that put a poor, poor, well-facially featured woman like you in danger" what is this jacob

w 17 persuasion

– Her expression changes a little

– It's the stone

w "I was attempting to attune with it but I was unable to in time"

w She put it in a hide hole

w Adam offers to trade hidey-hole locations

w She has a rat familiar and instructed it to take the stone to the city of the dead

w "can you tell the rat to bring it back"

• The city of the dead: mass cemetery where ppl of waterdeep bury their dead within city limits

○ Almost like its own ward

○ In the garlock? Garlof? family mausoleum

○ Adam gets her to pull out some of the items she's collected; some resistance

§ She comes back w a brass ring

□ Once one is attuned to it you are rendered invisible

□ "hold on to that for me hun and I'll come back"

○ Aerana is aware there are guards posted at night but it's a vast open space

• To the cemetery we will go

• Summary

○ Successfully dispatched the thugs

○ Gradually learning more abt the alleged horde of dragons

[spiffysixxsense]

All the unusual asks pleaseee 🖤

Its a good thing you asked for all of them becausw for some reason I can't get it to copy and paste the numbers 😂😂

who’s your celebrity crush?

Oh lord I have too many. Matthew Gray Gubler comes to mind from a recent tik tok😂. And Shemar Moore.

are you single or taken?

Taken since 7.4.16❤

rant. just do it

HOW IS IT 2020 AND BLACK MEN ARE STILL BEING MURDERED BY POLICE OFFICERS.

do you think its ok to separate the artist from the art?

...I'm honestly not sure what this is asking. I have a feeling it's meant to be deeper than this, but my brain makes it like removing credit for the artist from their work? Which is definitely not cool

how many accounts do you have?

On Tumblr? One. Just this shit show

how many pairs of shoes do you have?

About 10?

how many accounts do you follow?

405

favorite brand of clothing?

A new day? A brand from target 😂

name a dog

Lassie?😂😂😂

what unusual talent do you have?

I can remember exactly where I was/what I was doing the last time I heard a song the next time I hear it. Does that even make sense? (Also maybe not EVERY song).

For example, today I was listening to "King of the clouds" by panic! At the disco alone in my house. But I instantly remembered the exact spot in downtown Plymouth where my boyfriend and I were in the car the last time i heard it.

what’s the most interesting schools gossip you’ve ever heard?

I dont have enough friends for that😂

ever prank called a store?

I don't think so, but definitely prank called individual people lol

what’s your coffee order?

A mocha ice capp from tim Hortons.

what’s a question do you constantly get asked?

So what are you doing after college? What job do you plan to get? What are you gonna do with your degree?

if you had to get a tattoo right now, what would you get and where?

Well a tattoo I've had planned for ages but never went through with was a scorpion in a rose on my upper right thigh for my mom.

google the top song from the year you were born

Macarena by Los del Rio (huh?😂)

rant about your favorite musician 

Rant to me is negative and this isn't negative... but my rant is to how much I love shinedown because they released a song and merch specifically direct for covid relief funds❤

what’s your favorite teacher you’ve ever had?

Oh boy too many. High school? Probably Mr. Wesley (more for being his friend rather than teaching me) and Mrs. Roger's for actually teaching me something I really enjoyed, forensics.

In college, my cognitive psych professor, Dr. Clark-Foos. The topic at hand is already interesting to me, but he made it tenfold

describe your blog in 3-5 words

Clusterfuck (is that technically a word?)

"Millennial aesthetic, also sepia" (thank you Alex)

what’s a conspiracy you believe in?

THE TITANIC WAS ACTUALLY THE OLYMPIA😂

if you could see any concert tonight what would you choose?

The nickelback concert I already had tickets for but was canceled :(

if you could break one of your bad habits which would you choose?

MY FUCKY SLEEP SCHEDULE

can you dance? sing?

Absolutely not

what’s something you can’t stop buying?

I'm honestly pretty decent at restraining from buying things. I can't stop buying subq fluids for my cat?😂😂😂

crowds or small groups?

Neither, alone. Thank youuuu

how long before a trip do you pack?

Like a week because I'm so anxious about it lol

what celebrity would you rate a PERFECT 10?

Well refer back to the celebrity crush question? Also Matt Bomer

what quote or inspirational setting do you think is bs?

"We're all in this together"

if you had to dye your hair an unnatural color right now, what would you choose?

Oof. Probably blue

you can change one thing about your life right now. what are you changing?

Where I live (well, rather, who I live with.)

how old do you get mistaken for?

25, which isn't saying much when I'm 24

what do you think about a lot

My boyfriend, and also about hopefully some day being happy with my living situation lmao

do you like your hogwarts house or do you wish you were a different one?

Well I know nothing about the houses other than I'm a slytherin so I guess it's fine.

what does home mean to you?

Being content with who is around you. Anywhere can be home if you're happy with who is there

what do you think you’d be arrested for?

Retaliating against injustice

have you ever been called down to the principals office?

In middle school 😂😂

post a picture of the outfit you would choose if you could have any outfit you wanted

(Uh I will return to this after I post it because for some reason tumblr hates me and doesn't save drafts but I would love to rock a full on goth outfit)

describe your aesthetic

Cool, earthy tones, sepia filters. Greenery, white marble, silver accents.

answer with one of your ‘school memes’ (inside jokes you have with your class/grade) with no explanation 

Well im in grad school so I'm not sure how many inside jokes there are. Other than being dead inside?😂 (I'm in like 19th grade😂😂)

[anosmic-sheep]

tell us about your wardens lad

SAM YOU'RE MY FAVORITE PERSON AND I LOVE YOU

Brief Summaries of the Wardens, as of DAO:

Jairden Surana (my most fleshed out character):

Age 20 (born 9:10), cis male (he/him), disaster bisexual. He's 5' tall. Five foot 0. According to Google that's 152 cm. He's a small boy. I'm not good at physical descriptions so I'll just add a drawing or screenshot of him later.

Spirit Healer

Morrigan Romance (Opposites attract, what can I say?)

Too precious for this world. Way too kind and forgiving for Thedas to deserve him. Literally saw a Qunari 2 heads taller than him who was charged with murdering a bunch of people and was like "We're gonna be friends now. Because I said."

A huge pushover until you mess with someone he cares about, and he is very much capable of murder (though you wouldn't think so upon first meeting him).

Overly polite.

Biggest botany nerd ever.

Just a small dork.

"No, Jowan, we can't sacrifice the arless-"

His mom is actually from clan Lavellan! I have an alternate worldstate where he's the Inquisitor.

Will (Irrelevant OC mentioned earlier) is his younger half-brother!

Khoren Brosca:

Age 20, probably (she doesn't know and neither do I), cis female (she/her), a bit on the tall side for a dwarf. Vaguely functional pansexual.

Warrior (no spec yet, probably berserker or something tho)

Completely fucking feral.

Dual wields axes because fuck you.

Seems standoffish and uncaring, cares A Lot™

Trust Issues, daddy issues, just... Issues ™.

Alistair romance (has flirted with Leliana, only because I have no self control)

Very protective over the people closest to her.

Like Jared, 19, she never fucking learned how to read.

She's great and I love her.

"Son of a sodding nugshit."

Eran Tabris:

MY CHILD-

Age: 21 (born 9:09), nonbinary (they/them), asexual. Kinda bulky in build for an elf, average height.

Born Erana Tabris, and yeeted the "a" at the end off upon being conscripted into the Wardens.

Also feral, but is capable of being chill. Unlike Khoren.

"I WON'T HESITATE, BITCH."

Dual wield rogue

Will literally butcher a man if their patience is tested (example: the noble guy from their Origin)

Chaotic Bastard

No romance

Jairden is their cousin (Will isn't though, by blood at least)

Valori Amell:

Age 21 (born 9:09), cis female (she/her), average height. Sexuality? Who knows, definitely not straight though.

Pyromaniac with a bit of Entropy (may be a blood mage, have yet to decide)

If she were a Hawke she'd be purple.

"I'm just gonna stand back, and let the chaos unfold. Is it my business? No. Is my nose in it? Definitely."

Cullen's crush was a mutual thing, let's put it that way.

No decided romance. (Unless you count flirting with Cullen)

Ran STRAIGHT to Irving when Jowan told her shit.

Chaotic neutral.

Here come the Cousland Twins!

Wyle Cousland:

Age: 22 (born 9:08), cis male (he/him), gay as fuck. Kinda lanky.

Dual wield rogue part 2

Big dumbass energy

Third born child, baby of the family, dramatic as all hell.

"I am GOING to flirt with the pretty assassin, and NO, Wade, you can't stop me!"

"The closet?? Who is she, never heard of her!"

Full of jokes and pranks.

Favorite game is "how many times can I steal Alistair's coinpurse and put it back before he notices anything's happened."

A part of the joking is him deflecting how hard his parents' death is hitting him (gotta love that sweet sweet angst).

He and Wade make fun of each other constantly. Come on, they're siblings, what did you expect?

Very high-energy and extroverted, social and talkative.

Wade Cousland:

Age: 22 (born 9:08), cis male (he/him), straight. Bulky compared to Wyle.

Has not slept since 9:07 Dragon (aka the womb).

Sword and shield warrior.

Was initially going to be my obligatory asshole character, but I didn't have the heart to be mean to anyone.

Seems kinda cold and anti-social, but is a kind and considerate guy.

Very introverted, not a fan of small talk. Would rather go hit a training dummy, personally.

"Wyle, no."

Is basically Wyle's impulse control, and the certified Responsible Sibling.

People have judged his brother in the past. Each of them were at least punched by Wade at some point. 0 exceptions.

Has a crush on Leliana, is very much teased by Wyle about it.

Dry humor.

Has thrown Wyle into a lake when said twin brother would not leave him alone.

Spends the first part of the game mostly keeping to himself, quietly grieving his parents, as well as those lost at Ostagar (used much healthier coping mechanisms than Wyle)

Okay! I think that's pretty much everyone?? I love them all. I probably missed some things. Feel free to ask pretty much anything about any of them! Thank you Sam for asking about my children- I mean my OCs!

[kiruuuuu]

Ignorance is Blitz

Dearest @magehir​, I wish you a happy birthday and all the best 💖💖 May this next year bring all that you need. Thank you for existing, putting up with me and infecting me with the worst kinds of ideas :) This is a first part to the long-promised Wikihow fic, though it functions just as well as a standalone, and I hope you enjoy it! (hints for Blitz/Rook, Rating T, humour/fluff, ~5k words)

.

“How to give passive-aggressive gifts for Christmas”, Mute murmurs.

Rook’s brain shuts off mid-sentence. He supposes this is one of the situations where people claim to be thinking of a million possible responses when his thoughts have instead come to a screeching halt and the last syllable died on his tongue, never to be accompanied by its brethren which would’ve formed the rest of the term best describing the all you can eat buffet he went to recently: culinary extravaganza.

“How to find hot people to be friends with on Facebook”, Mute adds just as quietly as before, apparently oblivious to the sudden silence as his two friends merely stare at him in vague disturbance. “How to act like a modern vampire.”

“What the fuck”, Rook addresses him and attempts to catch a glimpse of his screen, now thoroughly concerned. “I hope to god this isn’t your google search history you’re reading right now or else we’ll have to start carrying around garlic soon.”

Mute, now having finally noticed their attention, is grinning down at his phone and announces: “How to hide an erection.”

“I could’ve used advice on that in school”, Glaz states drily, startling Rook into a laugh.

“How to be okay with having a communist friend.”

“Are those actual – what the hell are you reading?”

It’s yet another one of their lazy days, meaning they’re draped over various pieces of furniture, dying of boredom and hoping fate plops anything exciting into their laps. Their standards keep dropping with every passing second and it’s happened before that a small caterpillar became the highlight of one of their afternoons – they spent more than an hour simply feeding it and watching it eat and Glaz ended up almost crying when Sledge threw it outside to motivate them for kitchen duty. At this point, Rook would give his left arm for a balloon or a piece of string, though he keeps dismissing Mute’s claims about the internet harbouring enough entertainment to last several lifetimes. Maybe he just doesn’t know where to look, however.

“How to trick people into thinking you’re possessed.”

“Step one: be Mark Chandar on too many energy drinks.” Mute throws the Frenchman a glare and earns an innocent smile in return. “Seriously though, pretending to be possessed by a demon must be hilarious around Maestro, he’d probably cry.”

“He’d cry for you”, Mute informs him. “With me, he’d offer to put me down before even thinking twice about an exorcism. Do you think we should pick one of these stupid articles and actually do what it says? It could be entertaining.”

“Are there any remotely nice ones?”, Glaz wants to know hopefully. “Like ‘how to break into somebody’s room and clean it without their knowledge’?”

“Oh, here’s one for Jules – ‘how to love’.”

Before Rook can even threaten bodily harm, Glaz sighs and mumbles: “That one I definitely don’t need to read.”

Fighting down the urge to just hug him and never let him go so no one can ever hurt him again, Rook suggests: “They probably have stupid suggestions for really normal things too, don’t they? Like really detailed descriptions of how to shower for example, we can take those and exaggerate them a bit. How does that sound?”

“In that case I’ve got the perfect example”, Mute replies excitedly. “How to date. Short and sweet but the very first point is setting yourself up for success, so this should be good. If we follow this like a recipe, we’ll be dating left and right no problem.”

“Somehow, I doubt that”, Glaz sighs. “Who do you even want to date?”

“What do you mean, ‘you’? Shouldn’t you be the one to do it?”

“I’ll do it”, Rook volunteers to gloss over the fact that the last time Glaz asked anyone out on a date was likely ten years ago whereas he himself flirts with everything that moves, therefore making an unsuccessful attempt sting less. “So, how do I trick myself into being successful?”

“Define your expectations”, Mute quotes the article with a grin. “Are you looking for a lifetime commitment?”

“Sorry, mystery guy, but I’m already in a committed relationship with -”

“- yourself”, Glaz butts in, making Mute snort and break out into immature giggling as soon as he notices Rook’s indignant expression.

“… I was going to say my bed and food, but I guess that works. Thank you for the vote of confidence, in any case. Am I that self-absorbed? I don’t think I am, I’m a good listener, right? And it’s not like I talk over people or ignore them, or as if I’m lacking awareness of talking too much about myself. You wouldn’t call me egocentric, would you? I definitely don’t fit all of the criteria, after all I’m not -”

“Decide how you want to date”, Mute interrupts him quite rudely, Rook finds. “You’re absolutely not going to snag anyone on the internet, we may be out for a laugh but you’re not catfishing anyone.”

“Why would I catfish?! The only fitting part of that is the fish, since I’m a real catch”, Rook protests and causes the other two to groan.

“Yeah, no, I’m not letting you on the internet because you’d need a likeable personality for it. Oh, one of the options is having a friend set you up. I like that – Glaz, who should he try to date?”

“Craig”, the Russian deadpans immediately. Concerned silence follows as the other two attempt to assess whether he’s joking or not. “You can go watch a film with him and get kicked out when he won’t stop talking loudly.”

“I’d say Seamus but -”

“- there’s no way I can compete with Italian sausage”, Rook chimes in and feels a grim satisfaction at Mute’s grimace. He really reacts as if they were talking about his real parents. “Have you seen his bruises? The worst I’ve done is accidentally slap someone in the face.”

Glaz is horrified. “How do you… accidentally?”

“Listen, I was drunk, the guy kept getting louder and louder about wanting me to spank him but I at that point didn’t know how it’s done, so I just…”

“Maybe this was a mistake”, Mute grumbles and rubs his temple. “I would have you date Seamus now just out of spite but he’d chuck you out the nearest window as soon as you started babbling nonsense or acting weird. We need someone who’s more lenient, ideally someone nice so they don’t hold a grudge when we tell them it was all for shits and giggles, maybe shy because then your chances are better, and someone who doesn’t dislike you. So Fuze is out.”

“What, why?”

“Are you telling me you’d like to date Fuze?”

“No, I mean – why doesn’t he like me? He never talks to me, but he never talks to anyone.”

“It could be the fact that you helped Dom dye his teeth blue while he slept. Not only is it fucking creepy, he also looked like he ate all the Smurfs for a day.”

“What about Elias?”

Again, Glaz’ contribution gives them pause, albeit a noticeably more pensive one this time. He’s right, what about Blitz? Together with Sledge, Thatcher and Montagne he makes up Team Dad, meaning they look out for everyone but especially the younger operators, take them under their wing – yet it also means neither of the three are particularly keen on details about their love lives, which is why Mute’s thoughts instantly went to Sledge as a form of punishment. Blitz is similar in that vein, though he fits the Brit’s description to the letter: he’s quick to forgive people, has an atrocious track record concerning relationships as far as they know and he seems to enjoy Rook’s company. He might indeed be a good target for this.

“Rather him than Gilles or Mike”, Rook hastens to reply as soon as he realises that if he rejects the German, this is where his friends’ worrisome thoughts are going to end up. Both of them could easily be his dad, unlike Blitz who might have a fatherly protective attitude towards his younger colleagues but at least no grey hairs yet.

“I’m sure you could win them over with your boyish innocence”, Mute deadpans, making Rook grimace. “They might be a tad too old for your tastes though. I think Mike even owns a Cat Stevens CD.”

“Remember how Elias and Marius talked about a DOS-based game? I think he is, too, but he’s the best out of the three.”

“Ten years older isn’t too old.”

Glaz and Rook exchange a meaningful glance and merely raise their brows at an increasingly flustered Mute who looks ready to smack himself in the face with his phone, given how much he’s suddenly fiddling with it. “I’m not sure we’re talking about Julien and Elias anymore”, the Russian states drily, and Rook nods up a storm.

“Look”, Mute begins to defend himself to two expectant expressions and eventually just sighs in frustration. “Whatever, let’s not talk about my crush -”

“Oh, so it is a crush now, is it?”

“Shut up.” Rook wasn’t aware that Mute’s ears could be this shade of red. “James is… a good friend right now.”

“You say this as if you hadn’t thought about whether he sounds in bed just like the time Seamus accidentally pelted him in the balls with Diana’s tennis ball and he whimpered for an hour straight.” Rook feels a rush of pride at his comment when Mute suddenly looks ready to murder. It seems like he hit the mark, just like Sledge had done: right in the crotch.

“He strikes me as someone who’s had dog slobber in that particular area before”, Glaz murmurs probably as an aside and looks almost shocked when Rook’s instant guffawing lets him know that he said this out loud. Even Mute doesn’t seem sure whether he should be horribly offended or deeply amused.

.

In the end, they do decide on Blitz being their victim. Glaz gets cold feet halfway through the conversation, raising the issue of morality and deceit but gets shot down quickly when Mute lists some of the pranks with which Bandit got away and which had exceedingly far-reaching consequences. The West wing of their building still has no running water. Not that Rook is complaining about sharing their showers with some of its occupants, no, not at all.

“We’re going to Bond you up”, Mute announces while digging through one of the many, many drawers in the workshop that are filled with… stuff. Rook is waiting for the day this stuff starts pouring out of every cupboard they have, because it means it’ll all get cleaned up and tidied by someone who’s not getting paid enough and maybe then they’ll find the remote for the TV again. He’s sick of bribing people to turn the volume up or down by pressing buttons on the device directly, especially because his candy stash has run low by now because of it.

“What are you guys doing?”

Only Rook and Glaz turn away from the unmanageable mess of cords, cables, plugs and other electric parts in which Mute is elbow deep right now, and maybe Rook should worry about it turning sentient and swallowing the Brit whole at some point, but right now he’s worrying about one thing only: the possibility of Bandit catching wind of what they’re doing. He’s pretending to make nonchalant small talk but really, he must’ve smelled blood. He always knows when they’re up to something.

“Befriending communists”, Glaz replies politely.

“Hiding boners”, Rook supplies.

Bandit’s eyes narrow suspiciously but he remains silent as Mute produces a triumphant noise and pulls out what looks like an earring attached to a cable and a few other things, with a small box at the end. “Here we go! You can wear this, Jules.”

“In my life I’ve only fucked one guy who wore earrings”, Bandit deems it necessary to divulge. “And when he got dressed, he’d do sock shoe sock shoe.”

Rook snorts. “I’m not surprised you’re friends with James since you seem to have prior experience with psychopaths.”

“Let’s go, boys, we have all we came for”, Mute tells them, an unambiguous signal to not engage Bandit any further or else he’s never going to leave them alone, and starts herding them out of the workshop. To their collective annoyance, Bandit follows, unperturbed by the waves of get lost rolling off of them.

“If I give you a Curly Wurly, will you leave us alone?”, Rook addresses him and earns a scoff.

“Please, as if I could be bribed with sweets. This is an interesting device you’re undoubtedly going to misuse somehow and I want to see where it’s going.”

“And four hobnobs. The ones with chocolate.”

“I just told you -”

“Add a chocolate orange to that.”

“Deal. Have fun!”

.

“I feel extraordinarily gay”, Rook mumbles into his collar and prays that no one else in the canteen is paying any attention to him hovering uncertainly at the edge of the room, waiting for Zofia to be done talking to his mark. Blitz looks comfortable in the middle of the room, paperwork spread out on the table before him and an open bag of crisps by his elbow – only he would still be working during his lunch break. Considering all the people in front of whom Rook could be thoroughly embarrassing himself, he’s one of the better options as his smile is not only contagious but also very pretty. So even if this will influence his reputation for a while, Blitz is likely to be a good sport about it all.

Rook is wearing an apron reading Kiss the cook because one of the items on Mute’s blasted list involved making him look ‘approachable’, and since the pink t-shirt they gifted Glaz with the slogan ‘single and ready to flamingle’ is in the wash, this was the next best option. The earring which serves as Mute’s and Glaz’ way of communicating with him during this whole ordeal is not only garish but unfortunately a clip-on, so Rook couldn’t refuse wearing it. He feels like a budget version of an undercover agent, only much, much shadier.

“You look it, too, so it’s perfect”, Mute’s tinny voice reassures him into his left ear. They’re both sitting at the other end of the canteen, sharing popcorn and crunching infuriatingly loudly into their mic. “Make eye contact, smile and raise your eyebrows – that’s the first step, according to this masterpiece.”

It’s the perfect opportunity to implement a technique Rook has mastered almost twenty years ago: he starts out by rolling his eyes over his friends but as soon as he notices Blitz looking over, Zofia nowhere in sight, it transforms into a bright smile. This instantaneous switch in facial expressions has served him well over the years, especially around unlikeable teachers or bosses – only this time, he thinks a little too much about what Mute has said and ends up with a manic grin instead of a friendly smile while lifting his brows so high he must look either utterly astonished or inexplicably anticipatory.

Glaz masks his snort as a cough whereas Blitz reciprocates his bloodthirsty smirk with a much milder lifting of the corners of his mouth. Even from this distance, Rook can detect his concern which is probably fighting Blitz’ omnipresent drive to be social, accepting and open-minded. He always looks like this when Twitch’s current explanation has left him lost half an hour ago or when Tachanka jovially reminisces about early Spetsnaz training (and who in the world thinks that being chased through a hallway filled with blood and guts by a massive dog in the middle of the night was in any way, shape or form fun).

He’s starting to feel bad. Only a little, but honestly, when Blitz put on the clothes his blind roommate laid out for him this morning (because how else does he explain his usual attire), he probably wasn’t expecting to become a wikihow experiment today.

“I swear you’re gonna make me choke on this popcorn”, Glaz mutters and, like clockwork, Rook immediately replies: “Sounds less entertaining than choking on cockporn.”

More strangled noises in his ear, but fortunately Mute takes over to rescue him from certain death via being cast out of society by informing him of the next step: “Indicate interest and project confidence during social situations. Go on, be interested and confident. You’re as great as you are misguided in one of those, and terrible at the other.”

Rook ignores the slight (really, just because he once paid no attention to what Mute was telling him and they ended up stranded in the wilderness with no more gas doesn’t make him a bad listener, and him self-assuredly flirting his way into some stranger’s car who then became a little too interested in him doesn’t necessarily mean he’s overconfident), and approaches his target with a cocksure swagger he’s practised for exactly three seconds on the way to the canteen. “Hey, what are you doing, I like you, is this equipment paperwork, I’ve actually done a ton of these so I’m an absolute pro, how are you this fine day?”

Blitz stares at him. Maybe Rook should’ve let the other two know that he gets the worst case of stage fright whenever he feels observed in social situations and that it manifests in casual blabbering. “I, uh, I’m good, thanks. Are you alright?”

He sounds hesitant and Rook can’t blame him. After plopping down opposite of the German with a slightly less manic smile, he attempts to ignore Mute and Glaz whom he can very clearly see over Blitz’ shoulder and who both seem to be shoving their fists into their mouths to try and not giggle too obviously. “Peachy”, he beams. “How’s the work going? Is it just as work-y as always?”

His contagious laugh falls on deaf ears, at least from the man he’s talking to. Glaz looks about ready to cry.

“I suppose so.” Bless Blitz for his endless patience. The doubtful tone is still present and betrays his suspicion of something going on, but as Rook neither attempts to steal or set fire to the papers nor to shove a cake into his face, he probably figures there’s no immediate danger. “Have you actually filled out these kinds of forms before?”

“Confidence”, Mute squeaks into his ear, still suppressing his mirth, and Rook suddenly wonders whether Smoke would like to know about the time Mute despaired over his new laptop not working, troubleshooting it for several days and refusing any and all outside help until an innocently passing-by Jäger pointed out that it wasn’t plugged in. So far, the event has been contained but Rook has long been waiting for an opportunity to unleash this knowledge.

“Of course, I used to do them all the time as homework, I could do them in my sleep”, Rook lies through his teeth.

“Great!” It seems Blitz failed to get the memo about projecting entirely misplaced confidence because he goes on to ask: “Could you help me with this one detail then? I’m not sure what -”

And while he explains his problem, Rook’s brain long having shut off, Mute informs him of the next step: “Make engaging small talk. Ask broad, open-ended questions like ‘so, what got you interested in rock-climbing’.”

“So, what got you interested in rock-climbing?”, Rook interrupts Blitz’ detailing completely out of the blue. A distance away, Glaz is putting his head in his hands.

Blitz forgets to close his mouth for a few seconds, and Rook almost wishes he didn’t stop talking but instead ignored Rook’s question entirely. “I… am not particularly interested in rock-climbing, if I’m honest. Why do you ask?”

And while Rook flounders and stutters out a non-committal oh, you know, Glaz, the absolute angel on his shoulder, decides to step in and save him: “Perfect opportunity, the next step is don’t take yourself too seriously. Try making a joke at your own expense if you say something you think is utterly stupid. You can save this, Julien, I believe in you.”

“Well, uh.” Think, think, think. Rook feels like Winnie the Pooh and barely stops himself from tapping his temple. As usual, his mouth is writing checks long before his brain has earned the money, and so he witnesses in unfortunately non-mute horror as the words come over his lips: “It’s just that your muscles are as hard as a rock and I suddenly thought how awesome it would be to go rock-climbing.”

Smooth.

Blitz is genuinely gaping now.

Behind him, Mute nearly falls off his chair while shaking with silent laughter, and Glaz is wearing the all too familiar expression of ‘if anyone asks, I will forever deny knowing you’.

“I, um, well, thanks? I guess? Julien, are you sure there’s nothing wrong?”

“I’ve never felt better in my life.” Confidence, right? What was the other thing? Open-ended questions? “Speaking of, what do you want to achieve in life?”

How Blitz hasn’t gotten whiplash yet is a mystery. Maybe Rook will be able to make Mute laugh so hard he’ll drop dead. He’s looking a little blue in the face already. “Why do you ask? Do you really want to know?”

“Yes!”, Rook responds too forcefully and thanks whoever is responsible for Blitz being completely resistant to weird behaviour, merely accepting it as a fact of life and glossing over it. On second thought, the reason for this is most definitely Bandit and Rook would rather gnaw off his own toes than thank Bandit for anything.

Blitz’ eyes lower and he absent-mindedly moves some of the papers around. His entire demeanour… shifts. “I want to make a difference somehow. And I know this sounds horribly cliché, and everyone here has the same wish – but does that make it in any way less special? I don’t think so. We put our lives on the line to ensure some girl will have a mother when she grows up, to inspire some people to turn their life around, so that people have a roof over their head and peaceful sleep. And I don’t care if some say there’s better ways to do this. This is mine, this is something I’m good at, and my capabilities are useful here where they would be lost as a politician or anything else. And there always will be more to do, I’ll never be done, but that’s okay. I’ll know I’ve done a bit, and I’m happy with that already.”

Something flutters.

He hasn’t felt it in a while, not like this, usually stemming from a different place in his body or more concrete, aided by alcohol or general giddiness, but paradoxically his heartbeat is calming down despite the tingling sensation in his chest. Speechless, he stares at the man in front of him, trying to do what he always does when people’s sincerity makes him uncomfortable – joking about it in his head, react with sarcasm, discard the notion as sentimental or naive. Only right now, it’s his cynicism which feels fake instead of Blitz’ words.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bore you with a speech”, the German adds sheepishly and laughs a little. It’s cute. It’s the cutest thing Rook has seen today and if he does that thing where he scratches the back of his head because he’s embarrassed and a little lost now, Rook might pass out on the spot, just lose all body tension and glide to the ground like a jelly pancake because no one, and that includes genuinely happy Glaz, no one has any right to be this adorable.

Blitz scratches the back of his head.

“I’m going to faint”, Rook informs someone, he’s not even sure who, whether it’s Mute and Glaz and this is a badly hidden attempt at getting them to come to his aid, or whether it’s Blitz to inform him that the cute police is on his case.

“Oh, that’s right, it’s lunch and you haven’t eaten anything yet, no?” If his next sentence is something along the lines of ‘let me offer you food’, he’ll have to propose. There’s no way around it. “I’d offer you something more substantial but I only have the crisps. You can try them if you want, but they’re a little hot.”

Right on cue, Mute whispers in his ear: “You should find some common ground and then ask him out. This is already a disaster, no need to prolong it.”

“I love hot things!”, Rook exclaims cheerfully and it’s not even that big of a lie, except that ‘food’ isn’t on the list. But if Mute wants his common ground, he’s going to get it. Without checking the packaging, Rook reaches into the bag and shoves a few of the suspiciously red potato crisps into his mouth.

“He’s going to die”, Glaz utters full of concern, just as the spiciness hits Rook full force.

Blitz seems to be convinced of the opposite. “Really? That’s great, I’ve not found anyone who likes this type. You should try some of the Indian dishes I make now and then!”

Rook’s consciousness is fading, slowly being replaced by unadulterated fire. This must be what it’s like to be burnt alive, he reckons, and right now he’d rather eat glass than ensure a second more of this brilliant pain. His eyes are watering and he’s doing his best to efficiently chew without letting any more of it touch his tongue so he can swallow it as fast as possible, in the process ruining his throat. Now it, too, feels like he ate glass. “I’d love to”, he croaks and sniffles pitifully while a cold sweat breaks out on his back.

“Are you ill? You’re a little…” Blitz’ concern is as heartwarming as it is unwelcome; it only makes everything worse.

“Yes, actually.” He can’t cough now. If he does, all is lost, he won’t be able to stop, ever, and it’ll invade his lungs and slowly cook him from the inside out.

“You need to get out”, Glaz informs him, sounding troubled, “and eat your emergency chocolate. Now. Ask him and then bolt.”

This is it, huh. This is what he’s been working up to for the last half an hour: posing a question while sounding like he’s been smoking for longer than he’s been alive, choking back tears which make it almost impossible to see Blitz, and faced with all the kindness and compassion of a man he suddenly doesn’t want to disappoint.

And so he asks.

.

“I am still in shock”, Mute says. The others nod.

“I have no idea how it came to this”, Glaz says. More nodding.

“I can finally feel my tongue again”, Rook slurs and downs the third glass of milk, just to be safe. He feels like he ran a marathon, solved maths problems and had an allergic reaction all at once. Not to mention the overarching shame of having embarrassed himself in front of someone who turned out much more sympathetic than he thought.

“I don’t understand.” Mute’s rational brain is rejecting this reality, Rook can almost hear the gears crunching. “Why would he say yes?! Where did we go wrong?”

He’s hesitant to tell them that he actually wouldn’t mind getting to know Blitz better because the memory of them shoving oversized condoms into Glaz’ pockets in order to embarrass him in front of his crush is still all too fresh. “This was a success then”, he very inaccurately summarises the unholy catastrophe of whatever it was that happened in the canteen twenty minutes ago. Maybe he can just… pretend he doesn’t want to actually go on the date but go nonetheless, be far, far from either of these two so he might end up enjoying himself – and if something comes out of it, he still has ample time to let them know.

“You don’t seem sad about this result”, Mute picks up on his careful neutrality and squints. “Are you telling me you actually want him to make you groan with something other than his terrible dad jokes? Is that it?”

“We probably should’ve picked Shuhrat after all”, Glaz muses with a sigh. “He wouldn’t have accepted. He might’ve refused to ever go near you again, but at least we wouldn’t be in this situation.”

“Wait.” Mute is on his phone, which is never a good sign if the Thomas the tank engine toy he modified into a fully functioning flamethrower after having watched a video of someone else doing it was any indication. A sense of dread starts rising in Rook. “There’s instructions for a first date here, too. We can do the same thing again, give you instructions and have you follow them. At this point, we kinda have to do this.”

Rook pictures it. All he can see is carnage, chaos and more catastrophes. It’ll be a disaster, he’s already struggling with multi-tasking without it involving another largely unpredictable person, and his nerves don’t deal well with expectations of any kind.

He weighs this against the alternative: admitting that he’d like to go on the date without their interference and facing endless mockery as a result. He remembers his own mental threat against Mute to divulge embarrassing stories of his past to Smoke. He thinks of the time his tongue got stuck to a pole because Mute told him this only happened to children, not adults.

“Alright”, he agrees with a sigh and regrets his decision as soon as Mute’s and Glaz’ eyes light up.