#just in case yall need a tw for him
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randomwriteronline · 8 months ago
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Perditus grunted a little as he adjusted his leg while laying down against the rock. It was a pleasant day, all things considered: the sun was warm without being smoldering, the winds were strong but not as harsh as usual, and he had something to make the pain a little more bearable.
With his eyes shut he fished a flint lighter and a medicinal sghitt out of the pouch under his thigh armor.
He didn't bother looking as he heard footsteps approach quickly; medication stuck between his teeth, he clicked lazily until he caught the telltale crackle of papery tissue catching fire, took the longest, deepest inhale he could, soaking in the acrid taste and familiar burn in the back of his head, and let an enormous cloud of septic-smelling smoke blow out of his mouth with a growling sigh.
His fellow debtor sat beside him nervously, scanning the horizon.
"Any news?" he asked.
"I was going to ask you," the Glatorian replied.
"None, then."
"None."
Hard nails tapped far too quickly against the rock.
Perditus took another drag. The numbing effect was starting to take hold of his anguishing limb.
"Do you think it'll be soon?" Atakus asked.
The Tapyri exhaled: "Maybe."
"Yes or no?"
"Maybe, I said."
"Maybe means nothing," the other said, glaring at him with his typical nervous anger, the fact that the larger being still wasn't looking at him inconsequential: "Will it be soon, yes or no?"
A shrug: "Probably, yes."
"You think?"
"Unless he wants to observe these freaks of nature do their merry little dance in a new environment for a while. But I'll bet a guy like him has already watched them long enough to get bored by now."
Another pause.
The hard nails were now scratching at the stone.
Another long drag and a puff of smoke.
"Do you think he'll kill us before or after the plan's done?"
"Who knows," Perditus answered lazily. He reclined his head to better bask in the sun. "Before would be a little annoying. For us, of course, he wouldn't care if we never saw what all this thankless work has been for. But then again we're his cannon fodder - maybe he'll wait till he has no need even for that."
He played with his sghitt, turning it between his fingers.
The knowledge that his eventual instantaneous murder would be inevitable had slowly but surely numbed him to the very same fact across the span of the many, interminable centuries that had passed since the day he'd started wracking up this blasted debt, and his only request (which he knew would never be taken into consideration) was to be allowed to die slowly, painfully, so that he could at least feel the life leave his body properly; but Atakus had never managed to make peace with the horror of their shared fate, and now that the moment was drawing near he was every day a little closer to losing his mind completely to the horror of his situation.
Frankly he was surprised the Potori had lived this long, with as anxious a disposition as he had. He'd always imagined he'd get out of his shackles with a stroke.
And yet here they both were.
Awaiting the second coming of a cruel god.
And while entire species were about to be massacred into heaps of melting, wailing scraps any second or day or month now, they were sitting against a rock under a pleasantly warm sun bathing in its light.
He could hear the Agori's irregular breath become louder.
"How's your leg?" Atakus asked in a fruitless attempt at changing the course of his spiraling thoughts.
"Hurts as usual." Perditus replied. "How's your heart?"
"Beating too fast," the Potori answered, "As usual."
The Glatorian's hand leaned over to the smaller being, offering the sghitt between his index and middle: "Take as many as you need."
The medicine was taken from his fingers by significantly shakier ones. He listened to the air slither with a long hiss into Atakus's lungs for the first time; the second was a little longer, a little less frantic, followed by a loud sigh; the third time was slow and deliberate, finally a little more at ease.
He listened to the sound of Skrall armor scraping against stone as the Agori laid back against the warm rock with him. A smaller hand placed the medication back in his palm, and he hummed gratefully before taking another drag himself.
The wind picked up slightly and dragged the smoke away from them.
He opened his eyes blearily, squinting in the sun.
Such a nice day.
Something far, far away, up in the clear sky, exploded. He saw the burst, a blot of bright hot color tearing apart the stratosphere, and long lines of white and faint red as pieces of whatever that was tried to land on Spherus Magna; but the destroyed body was barely above the size of a dot from where he was, and its meteors shriveled up into dust before coming anywhere close to the highest point available for them to strike, and in the end nothing of whatever tragedy had just transpired mattered at all.
The Glatorian hummed.
"Did something happen?" Atakus asked, eyes closed.
"No," his companion reassured him. "Relax."
The Potori did not respond, and got a little more comfortable.
Perditus glanced at him.
Maybe it made sense - he mused for a second, a second only - for Velika, of all cruel, paradoxical beings, to one day have complete and total control over this cruel, paradoxical world.
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s-ccaam-era-crepe · 2 years ago
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elaborating because I said I was going to and I feel like it-
A bit earlier in season 2, the main reason I saw people hating on scary was that she was betraying the team, she was endangering the other teens, and she did typical angsty teen girl "rebel" things.
Yes Scary has endangered the teens and done bad things and said some untasteful stuff. However during most of these periods she is also being heavily manipulated and clearly being used by someone who has power over her. (and when she wasn't she was doing stupid teenager stuff that you have to admit, teenagers do.)
Glenn did some of the same things. While not being influenced by any higher person in his life (and might I add that Glenn is a grown adult and Scary is what? hmm 14? 15?). He left the dads during episode 9 (?) because he wanted to protect himself, he's neglectful of his son and his needs, he's ignorant and sure a similar character to Scary when you look at the two of them, but not the same.
So you like the middle aged guy who's a neglectful father to his son, and leaves his friends during dangerous situations, okay, I don't blame you! I like him too!! However... if you also hate the teenage girl who didn't like her stepfather bc she has internal anger and she's a little angsty and sarcastic and she leaves her friends when things get hard...
Okay. Come back and talk to me when you find some morals <3
If you're a glenn fan/lover but also a scary hater I Do Not trust you
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millieisawriter · 2 months ago
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Sacrum et profanum
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javier escuella x reader
summary: the story of how the mexican outlaw fell for the pastor's daughter
wc: 2.5k
tw: ends with smut - loss of virginity, unprotected sex, creampie, quite a lot of religious references during the act
english isn't my first language
all pics taken from pinterest
♡this wasn't requested, but if you wish to request something you're more than welcome♡
+18 so none of yalls parents come for me
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It was somewhere in Montana where Javier met you. Some little town nearby which the gang was camped. That evening when you two met was nice and chilly, you were just walking back home from a gathering with other women at the church.
Actually, the first time you didn't even talk. You possibly didn't even realize a pair of eyes was on you. But he had noticed you, it was hard not to, you were too beautiful for your own good.
Javier had met many beautiful women in the past, but none of them quite like you. He forgot half of them, if not more, after a few days or so, but he knew that wouldn't be the case with you. So he watched, silently, following you from the shadows.
Maybe it was God who urged him to talk to you the second time he saw you. The need to do it appeared in his mind almost unexpected. He shouldn't, after all, knowing it's not the best idea to start anything with a girl of a different belief.
In the following days, he tried to reason it away, telling himself that there was little to be gained in wanting a girl whose father, firstly, preached a different faith, and secondly one who surely warned you against men like Javier, considering his line of work.
But something urged him to do it.
This time you didn't come straight back home. Something made you turn your gaze towards a patch of beautiful wildflowers nearby, and you stopped momentarily just to gather some.
"Good evening." Was all he said in a greeting, but it was enough to say a lot about him. There was an accent to his voice, one that told you he came from somewhere in the Latin America.
You looked up at the man from where you were kneeling down by the flowers, and then you knew you had to be careful. Not only was he a stranger, but by the way he was dressed you could tell he was a drifter. It would be the best to not engage in a conversation with him at all, but currently you weren't really in a position to do so.
"Oh," you managed as you stood up, clutching the little bouquet of the wildflowers in your hands, "good evening, mister."
Noticing how your eyes slightly widened, he figured he could've taken a better approach. "Sorry, didn't mean to startle you." He apologized as sincerely as he could.
You had no idea what this man could have wanted from you. He was too polite to intend to rob you, what you had assumed at first.
"It's allright." You replied, still trying to remain cautious, even if the man's behavior didn't fit the outlaw archetype your father would often feed your brain with. "I don't think I've seen you around before."
What made you say it? You didn't know. You didn't have to engage in a conversation with this man. You could have excused yourself out of it, and walked back home.
"Just passing through," he admitted, "excuse my forwardness, but I had to approach you. You're very... captivating." He tipped his hat, adding, "Javier Escuella."
Having learnt his name, you then proceeded to introduce yourself, not forgetting to add that you're the pastor's daughter. It seemed like Javier was studying your name as if savoring the sound of it.
You felt the urge to look away, not used to the sort of attention he seemed to be giving you, but you didn't. After all, he was rather captivating, too.
"Well, miss, it was pleasure to meet you. Mind if I walk you home?"
You faltered for a second. A stranger, a drifter on top of that and possibly one of a questionable line of work, asking to walk you home did sound a bit suspicious.
But his tone seemed sincere to your inexperienced ears. So you agreed. "No, I don't mind."
And that was how your story began. It was simple, and kind of sweet. You started sneaking around behind your family's back, making up excuses for your delayed return home, sometimes even daring to sneak out at night just to meet with Javier. So romantic, right?
You haven't been acting like yourself, really, and your family was quick to figure it out. Your father, especially. You didn't know if he assumed, or knew for certain, but he accused you of seeing a man. Maybe your sneaking out just wasn't sneaky enough.
Whatever you had with Javier, wasn't as sweet and romantic in your family's eyes as it was in yours.
"He's not a bad man, daddy!" You exclaimed during one argument.
"Then how come hadn't he come to me first?" You father asked. "A good man always asks the father for permission!"
But this didn't speak to you. Of course, that's what a good man does, but Javier was good to you regardless. To other people, however... well, he told you about the gang, what they do. Maybe what they were doing wasn't morally right, but the idea they did it all for was not that senseless. Stealing from the rich, giving to the poor (such as themselves, too). Almost noble, wasn't it?
In the evenings you met, Javier would talk about the injustices he had seen, the rich and powerful who lived untouched by the struggles of the less fortunate ones. And he spoke about Mexico a lot, too.
"Porfirio Díaz," he'd scoff, "he talks about order and progress like he's some saint sent to save us, but who's he saving? Not the people. It's all about the men with deep pockets, the hacendados who sit on their wealth while the rest of us scrape by."
Your eyes would widen, as you had always been unaware of what was happening outside of your little town, especially in foreign countries miles away.
"I had no idea it could get that bad." You'd mutter, as if trying to apologize for the actions of the bad people.
"It did get really bad," Javier would confirm, "in the mines and plantations, people work themselves to death. And the campesinos who once owned their own land, Díaz has stripped them of it all. Forced them into a kind of slavery, with debts they'll never pay."
"What about your family?"
He went silent for a longer moment everytime you'd ask about his family. Not that he didn't like talking about them. He loved them, cared about them. But talking about them could lead him to revealing a bit too much about his past, which he didn't want to happen just yet.
"I don't know, I haven't heard from them since I left." Was all he'd say, and then change the topic. "It's not that different here. Those in power look down on everyone else, like they're entitled to all the best things. Same sort of greed, the same control."
Many times you wanted to ask him why won't he go back there, the question lingering in your mind. At some point you thought maybe he just didn't want to, but why would he care if he thought America was the same?
And one time, he answered the question without you even having to ask about it. "Maybe one day this will all end and I will have a place to return to. But until then, I try to survive here with the gang, making our own justice."
You felt so attracted to his words. There was a thrill to being with someone so different, someone who believed in something beyond the rules you had grown up with. Your father's words still haunted you, though.
You knew how disappointed your father was, and that weighted on your chest like a big rock. Not like the guilt would ever stop you from continuing to sneak out.
One night when you sneaked out to meet Javier, he took you on a ride on Boaz. You two rode off to some secluded spot in a forest, stopped just by the river.
"My daddy thinks you're no good for me," you decided to confess, sitting down on the grass, "he always told me men like you are bad."
"Bad? Why bad?" Javier asked, sitting down next to you. He knew the answer, and he knew your father was right.
"You you shoot people, you steal from people, these are sins," you paused, and Javier could see you were figuring it out on your own, "but I know you do this for a good cause."
Javier leaned back, propping his arms behind him. He was aware of the sins he commits, but he knew God forgives him every time. Every man he killed or stole from, he did it in good faith, after all.
You fiddled with a blade of grass, staring down at your hands. "But... don't you fear for your soul?"
Javier replied confidently, "I believe God knows my heart. I think... I hope that God understands."
Your whole life your father had taught you about God, sin and salvation, about the strict path that must be followed without deviation. And, knowing that Javier was a catholic, you thought he'd see it in the same way. But somehow, his beliefs seemed more open, laid back, even if catholicism was supposed to be the branch of christianity more strict than protestantism.
Sensing your uncertainity, Javier reached out, touching you gently. "I don't think God cares about rules as much as He cares about our intentions, mi corazón."
For a moment, you just looked at him, letting him wash you over like the water at your feet. There was something freeing in what he said. Something human and imperfect, but deeply tender. You wondered, for the first time, if there could be a world beyond rules and judgments that you were raised with.
You turned to look at Javier, feeling warmth rise in your cheeks as you abandoned the heavy thoughts that had clouded your mind. "What does mi corazón mean?"
Javier smirked. "It means my heart. Like calling someone darling in english."
Hearing him say it made your own heart quicken. You realized you'd never felt this way with anyone before. As his fingers traced gentle circles on the back of your hand, the touch alone was enough to set aside every doubt you could've had. Javier looked at you with a softness that broke through every barrier, his gaze holding yours like a prayer.
"Is that what I am to you?" You asked, the nickname he used for you making it feel like a promise of eternal love. "You heart?"
"Sí, eres mi corazón." He answered, pulling you closer, and even though you didn't know any spanish, you understood his words well.
And then you allowed him to kiss you, but it didn't stop on that. His actions went further, his movements careful as if afraid of breaking some unspoken vow between the two of you.
You let him guide you our of your clothes, feeling some kind of holiness in his touch, as if he wanted to worship like a deity. Soon after that, he removed each piece of his own clothing too, so that there were no barriers between you.
You'd be lying if you were to state you weren't scared. But the desire you felt was stronger than your fears, even if you've never been with a man like this before.
You were a virgin.
He had you underneath himself, one of his hands supporting his body above yours, while the other gently cupped your chin, guiding your eyes to meet his.
"Don't be afraid, mi corazón, I won't hurt you." He murmured.
"Not what I worry about," you replied, "what if..." you hesitated, feeling the weight of a lifetime's worth of sermons, prayers, and your father's preaching pressing down on you. "What if I'll be condemned to hell for this? For wanting you, for...us?"
"Do you really think a God who made us so full of love would punish you for feeling it, corazón?"
He was right, you knew that. So you did something you hadn't expected yourself to do. Placing your hand on the back of his neck, you pulled him in to kiss him.
At the same time, you felt a new sensation, one so unfamiliar to your body, but one that felt so good. You couldn't help, but gasp as you felt Javier filling you up with his dick. He did it slowly, almost tentatively, as if handling something sacred. Every inch he pushed into you was like an offering for your holy self.
And to him, each sigh, each moan you gave in return was an absolution to his sinful soul. Your bodies fit perfectly together like two hands holding the same rosary.
As your head fell back, the words slipped from your lips, "Oh, God." Both sacred and sinful at the same time, both cursing you for the rest of your life, and sending you straight to Heaven in Javier's embrace.
Javier kissed these words off your lips, his hips never stopping snapping into yours, and the wetter you got, the more rapidly he could fuck into you.
The act got you wondering, why is it considered so sinful when it gives so much pleasure. You were commiting a great sin, giving yourself to a man you weren't married to, but it felt godly. Maybe that was why it was so sinful - because it was indescribably blissful, so divine. Because it made the man seem like some kind of a deity in the moment, instead of the God in the sky directly above.
If you were going to get punished for this, you didn't mind. You didn't care. You could do this a thousand times over and over again.
"Ah, fuck, I'm gonna–" Javier said, feeling himself approaching closer to the edge.
For some reason, despite this being your first time, you knew exactly what his words men. And despite everything that could happen after this, despite all the possible consequences, you once again said something you didn't expect yourself to say.
"Don't pull out," the words left your mouth almost instinctively, "I want you to fill me up."
Every part of you wanted to feel it, to take all of him without hesitation. He did as you asked, filling you up as he reached his high. You felt warmth spread over your body, starting from the center of your abdomen, reaching every place of your body like a strike of lightning, and feeling his release shoot into you made it even more intense.
You were breathless, and Javier stayed buried inside you for a moment longer after the both of you were finished, his cock like a cork stopping his seed from spilling out from your sacret grove.
"I'm starting to understand why people sin so much," you giggled.
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hamsternella · 6 months ago
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Obsessive!Kenji Sato x Gn!Reader || Headcanons
tw: obsessive attitudes, violent behaviors, manipulation, minors DNI
From: Ultraman: Rising
A friend asked me to write something small about him, so here it is. It was quick and uncorrected, sorry😔
I really liked the movie. What do yall think??
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GENERAL BEHAVIOR
Kenji is unbearable.
At the beginning of the relationship he was a nice guy, with a smile and a dazzling look.
But as the months passed, he began to transform into an unrecognizable man.
A scary person, if you were honest with yourself.
Forget about late nights out,
Forget about turning off your cell phone,
And above all, forget about your alone time.
I mean, why would you want to be alone?
What do you say, excuse me? 'Stress' and 'depression'? Discomfort, you say!
Kenji is handsome, wealthy, and has property at your mercy that you can walk around if you are bored and 'depressed'.
In fact, what the heck is that 'depression' stuff?
Kenji starts monitoring your moods and health to keep you up to date with routines to de-stress.
He has little patience, so you'd better be obedient.
Kenji wants the best for you. He doesn't understand what your attitude is about; but he's willing to give you as much love and understanding as he can…
... unless your needs begin to interfere with his needs.
In that case it will be impossible to make him see reason.
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SPECIFIC
Kenji is the kind of partner who gets angry easily when you don't give him attention or if you don't understand his jokes. This guy has a short fuse. There comes a point in the relationship where you feel like you're walking on eggshells; and eventually it's hard to even enjoy the quiet moments without thinking that all of a sudden he'll be upset about something, taking it out on you.
Still, Kenji is not the kind of person who is violent to a fault. He would never hurt you physically - he'd rather be dead than have to hurt you that way. Instead, his way of handling you is with words: he manipulates you emotionally and psychologically all the time, or when he thinks it is necessary to keep you in line.
He knows all too well how vulnerable you are because of your mental state - depression and anxiety eating you up inside. So, in addition to not understanding, or not wanting to, he uses it to scare you or make you feel guilty; as well as responsible for his emotions and needs.
Other than that, Kenji is a person who likes to provide for his partner. At your disposal, if you have been good, you will have money, constant outings, as much as you want them, and purchases of all kinds in his name. Kenji also prefers to have you close by so he can easily monitor your activities; so you can live next to him and in various properties throughout his travels around the world; or in any type of home you wish. He is willing to fulfill your fantasies.
And of course, you also have to be willing to comply with his.
One of Kenji's dreams is to be able to form a strong and united family with you. He wishes to have you happy, with one or two children included. At the beginning of his relationship with you he was only looking to satisfy that voracious hunger he felt when he saw you. But as the years went by, he began to desire you with a strength that went beyond something as banal as that; and his future plans, each and every one of them, seemed to be tied to settling down and starting a family.
What could be more beautiful than to have you at his complete mercy? To have no one else by your side, and to depend on his strength, love and affection forever. Kenji is willing to sacrifice anything if he can, not only keeping the world at peace by being Ultraman, but also protecting you from yourself; and giving you something that will force you to stay by his side if the time comes when you decide to leave.
He can be very good, especially if it's for you. You just have to be obedient and do what he tells you; life is easier if you don't have to make decisions, right? Just relax, stay at home watching his games, and when you least expect it, you'll be back in his arms. You don't have to make any effort: the world will be safe thanks to Ultraman, and in the privacy of your home, you will be safe from that same world and your boring old reality thanks to Kenji.
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NSFW
Thanks to the training, Kenji has a good rhythm and can stand enough to take the time to satisfy you in everything you want. He can adapt to many of your fantasies, as long as they don't involve having to hurt you too much physically.
When giving orals he prefers to receive them. He is not a person who has a lot of experience, to be honest, and that partly embarrasses him. All he wants in the end is for you to have enjoyed it, but he knows he's going to lose out if he has to put his mouth down there; so he prefers to have you on your knees, and he'll take care of the bare minimum with his own mouth before using his hands.
Anal sex? A thousand times. He loves to use your ass; he usually touches it even if you're in the living room, watching TV, or if he catches you off guard. He just rubs it with his hands or caresses it deeply with a couple of fingers as he feels the heat welling up in his lower belly. The first time you offered it to him was quite a show: the guy couldn't keep the excitement in his eyes, and it was hard for the session not to end quickly because of the pressure that threatened to make him cum immediately.
Virgins? He doesn't really care. Why would he be worried about you being one or not? To Kenji, what you did or didn't do before him doesn't matter. The only important thing is what happens when you're with him… which is funny, because he's got you under control all the time. But yeah, more or less like that.
CNC? Definitely not. He loves the idea of having you at his mercy, of course, but he doesn't like those shady fantasies at all. He worries about doing you a lot of harm, and although he himself has even admitted to having similar thoughts about you, he finds it difficult to put them into practice for the same reason.
Aftercare? You can be sure of one thing with Kenji: after any sex session, comes the best aftercare of your life. Get ready to relax in his arms, with a torrent of kisses or caresses and sweet words, barely understandable between his tired murmurs. He knows where to touch you to have you surrendered to his charms. Sleeping next to him, at least when he is in a good mood, is the glory.
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sl8yter · 6 months ago
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Get It Together - Mühl
Pt 1.
Nikas bestfriend Nahiem is “going through a hard time” and Nika is always there for him. Which causes a lack of presence for her gf.
TW - Angst, mentions of cheating, insecurity, nika being a meanie, and lots of audacity
Im in the mood for angst so sorry yall
Nika Muhl x fem reader
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“Nika.”
….
“Baby hello?”
“Nika”
“Huh oh sorry bebo I was texting Nahiem” Nika replies to my endless please in an exasperated tone looking at me standing in the kitchen as I prepare our plates
Dont start and argument please Niks
“Didn’t you guys just hang out last week? You said this week it’d be about us.” I walk towards Nika setting her plate on the table in front of me
“Hes my best friend and hes going through a hard time right now. I cant just ignore him.” She says finally taking her eyes off her phone to look at me
“Yea I know and I understand that but sometimes it feels like you care about him more than you do me.”
“Well I didn’t mean to make you feel that way and im sorry you do”
I sit down frustrated at her statement slightly banging the plate against the table
“Jesus christ, please dont be like that tonight” Nika says playing with her food
“Youre right, Im sorry its just that I love you you know that I do and I wish to spend time with you but its hard to do that when your friend is dragging you off everywhere. It makes me feel ignored.”
Why am I apologizing shes the one with the attitude
“Well Im sorry you feel that way bebo im not trying to ignore you. I want to spend time with you too. But Nahiem needs me too. We’ve been friends forever you know that” Nika says staring at me with a look in her eyes. The same look she gives me whenever she just wants me to agree with her
“I need you too Nika its not fair youve guys have been hanging out too much. I mean imagine if I went to go hang out with one my guy friends every other day.”
“What the fuck are you trying to imply here” Nikas tone changes. Her syllables grow sharper and her accent comes out
Shes mad
She stares at me waiting for my reply as im silent for a moment
“Im not trying to imply anything. I just want you to understand how it looks from my perspective. Which now you clearly do. I dont think you would do that to me but I cant help but wonder sometimes. Youre always texting him and barely even texting me anymore.”
“Im not cheating on you if thats what youre trying to imply. I lost my appetite, im gonna head out.” She adds with quickness, standing up from her chair and grabbing her keys off the counter
“No you always do this. Whenever things dont go your way or I dont immediately agree with you you leave I want to talk more. I want you to understand me more.” I say chasing after her pulling her arm to make her look at me
“Well I try and you make it so difficult”
“You try? You’re kidding me. I barely see you anymore. I wake up and youre gone. I tell you I want to talk its always im busy or later im out with friends. Im trying it feels like im the only one trying anymore.”
“I try so hard you just dont see it.” She grabs my hand and squeezes it giving me a sorrowful face.
That isnt what she looks like when shes sad
“What dont I see Nika please explain to me” I ask knowing shes full of it. She just wants someone to come home to
Her silence makes me snap. I let go of her hand
“Im actually so tired of your bullshit. Im gonna be frank with you since you arent gonna comprehend it any other way. I love you Nika I want to work on our relationship but you have to want that too. At this point ive debated leaving and ive also debated staying in case the sweet girl I knew a year ago wanted to show up again. I think we need couples counsel-”
Im cut off by her grabbing the sides of my face and attempting to kiss me. I retract quickly and try to ask her why she did that but she cuts me off before Ieven start
“Why are you being so difficult right now.” She says giving me a look of disgust. As if a kiss or angry fuck was gonna fix this
“Fuck off Nika. You can leave. Im not the one being difficult. I really dont want to lose you but if youre gonna keep being such a dickhead to me you cant leave. Ive had enough. I try so hard to understand you and I want you to let me im but obviously that isnt gonna happen. I love you but its obvious its not reciprocal.”
“What?”
“You heard me. Leave. Get your self together then you can come back to me. Its gonna be hard to put whatever emotions you have or had for me into words but when you do and you can explain to me why you wanted to throw all this away for me for some guy who probably wants to hit and dip.” I say in the calmest voice possible holding back from yelling at her. If i yell im gonna cry and if I cry Nikas gonna hug me, then ill fold.
I cant give in this time
“Wait bebo im sorry okay I can see how much this hurts you. Lets talk this out I can stop talking to nahiem. I swear he doesnt mean anything to me. I love you let me prove it.” She says, her long and built arms trying to snake around me
“No Nika , I already tried to talk this out. Go back to your dorm, take a shower, and go to sleep. Then we can talk all you want. I need to be alone tonight” I say pushing myself off her as I walk away heading to my room
“Im sorry baby please don’t do this” She says still standing at the door
At least she respects my space
But she doesn’t respect me
“Go to bed Nika” I say before shutting my door
I hear a soft cry before the muffled sound of the door shutting and locking
I hope she does wanna talk in the morning
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Also i dont proofread my writing. I write based off what my angelic soul is telling me so if you see some mistakes or some blank spaces 🦍🦍🦍
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pillow-princess-diaries · 1 year ago
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𝙱𝚂𝙳 𝙼𝚎𝚗 𝙰𝚗𝚍 𝙷𝚘𝚠 𝚃𝚑𝚎𝚢’𝚍 𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚌𝚝 𝚃𝚘 𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝙰𝚜𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚃𝚘 𝙿𝚎𝚐 ‘𝙴𝚖…
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Summary:- how the bsd fellas would react to you asking to peg em
Pairings :- Dazai, Atsushi,Kunikida,Ranpo, Chuuya,Akutagawa,Tachihara, Poe, Jouno,Tecchou x Fem!Reader (seperately)
Tw:- pegging, anal (m receiving), handjobs, mentions of dirty talk (and a single line in poe’s part)
W/C :- 1.2k-ish
A/N :- Thank You to @chuuyassluttychoker and @falloutjuli for givin me their feedback on this before i posted it. And Now Thanks To Yall pegging Kunikida in just floating in my head 😭 Thank U To My Bestie @sapphic-serenade too!
This Could Pass as a Gn! Reader except for one line in jouno’s part and mentions of calling the reader, princess and queen in Tachihara’s part
MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DON’T FOLLOW, YOU’LL BE BLOCKED!
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𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝘼𝙧𝙢𝙚𝙙 𝘿𝙚𝙩𝙚𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝘼𝙜𝙚𝙣𝙘𝙮
𝐃𝐚𝐳𝐚𝐢
doesn’t mind it tbh. He’d honestly love to have you do all the work while he sits back and takes it.isnt opposed to it and he’s so normal abt it it feels like he’s done it before🤨.takes it all in like a champ! And the way he moans your name just makes you wanna stay buried in him.he’s such a wet cat of a man it’s impossible to not enjoy his squirming~ especially when he looks so pretty and pathetic around your cock.face down ass up ofc~
𝐀𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐢
Definitely caught off guard when you ask!would be very iffy about it but when he sees your excited face and sparkling eyes,he just cant seem to say no!please be gentle with him,lube it up real good and slowly insert it. He’ll be a squirming and mewling mess for just the first inch,but dw he can take it.unless he says otherwise,in which case please pull out and tell him how good he was for you🥺 it’ll motivate him to take more later.what can i say this man is a slut for praise,and in cases like this it really tends to work in your favor~
𝐊𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐤𝐢𝐝𝐚
Honestly i dont see him bein pegged…he just doesn’t seem like the type to be down to try it.best case scenario you could ask him to do it on maybe a special occasion like your birthday! That’s when the chances of him saying yes are the highest.so if you somehow dooo get him to agree,know he will nott be still.Kunikida is more sensitive than he looks (in more ways than one iykwim ;} ) so you will definitely need to ease him into it,maybe use your fingers as a little precursor ,and if he gives you the go-ahead,be.gentle. He wont be able to do too much on your first try.Thank Him and tell him it’s alright please 🥲. (Dw he’ll more than make up for it later in the night.)
𝐑𝐚𝐧𝐩𝐨
This man doesn’t give a single solitary fuck.doesnt care if you wanna fuck him in the ass as long as he gets to be your pillow princess~ he can surprisingly take a good amount in and oh Godd the little noises he makes💞 If you thought dazai would sound pathetic nah uh,ranpo takes the cake.he lets out the cutest little mewls as his head hits the pillow.he’s folded in half, your ploughing into him and he’s taking you so Goddam gooddd. He’ll act bratty fs,so maybe plug him up a little to teach him a lesson. Maybe even add a vibrator to the mix~ (he will DEMAND snacks afterwards😭 give em to him pls🥺)
𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙋𝙤𝙧𝙩 𝙈𝙖𝙛𝙞𝙖
𝐂𝐡𝐮𝐮𝐲𝐚
very VERY skeptical.doesnt like the feeling of being penetrated from the rear,but the thought of being at your mercy and under your influence,just…makes him a little more likely to relent.what can i say,he finds you taking the lead hot as Fuck! And while he’s definitely more of a top,i kinda feel like he has moments where he wouldn’t mind being pampered a little~Takes it quite well(surprisingly) and his little whines are the bestt ,if you dirty talk him while you’re pushing in,he’ll break his sentences with little gasps and moans in the middle and they just make you want to keep going.If u jerk him off while you rut into him he’ll definitely be caught off guard but it turns him on tbh.But you’d best believe that once youre done with him,he’s gonna flip you over and RUIN you.You had your fun,now it’s time for him to remind you who’s actually in charge~
𝐀𝐤𝐮𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐰𝐚
Nope.nah uh. No matter how much you beg,he’s not lettin you do it. Akutagawa doesn’t get intimate much,(idk i see him like sheldon from The Big BangTheory in this regard) and when he does he is in charge.he obvs wants u to feel good too but he does have a line he doesn’t wanna cross.also he feels like that puts him in a vulnerable position and doesn’t like it…its not that other positions don’t also put him in a vulnerable position,it’s just that this one makes him more uncomfortable…please dont pressure him into it🥹
𝐓𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚
I honestly believe this bitch would be the most down to try it😭.He’ll be visibly chill when you suggest it,but inside he’s both anxious and excited, Goes with you to pick out a dildo.(if you dont already hv one that is) and gets flabbergasted when he finds out there are ones that actually cum!😭 (you have to convince him to leave it for next time🥲) when actually doing it,hes so verbal. Cussing,moaning,and praising you.wouldnt mind if you were a little rough. If you have him sit on your strap while you jerk him off he will physically fall apart; putty in your hands,if you will. Moves around and when you grip his hips to keep him still, he moans. While he likes to think of himself as a top,he’s a total bottom,but cam def top if you want him to.you’re his queen,princess and he’ll gladly be your good little boy☺️
𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙂𝙪𝙞𝙡𝙙
𝐏𝐨𝐞
Blushes immediately but agrees. Reads up on pegging so he knows what to do,he really wants to do good by you smh🥲.would prefer if you guys did it in missionary so he can see you go at him but wouldnt mind you coming in from the rear either .just a little idea,when youre hittin it from the back,grip his hair and lift his head a little before leaning in and asking him, “who’s my whiny little baby~” watch as he whimpers before answering with a strained “me.” Oh also this man is definitely the most sensitive of the ones on this list. He makes the cutest noises too~ poe’s little whimpers and whines are honestly music to your ears and when you’re done,kiss him and tell him how good he was for you,he’ll physically deflate and give you the cutest fucked out smile🥺
𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙃𝙪𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝘿𝙤𝙜𝙨
𝐉𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐨
Aint no way in hellll youre pegging this man! The mere suggestion has him bending you over to remind you who’s in charge.just because he can,he might just put the tip of the dildo you’d planned on using on him,into your folds while he takes you from behind. will not stop until he has you moaning out how stupid it was for you to even suggest that.fucks you so good youre nothing but a mess of cum and moans.So if you wanna get fucked up harder than usual,just casually suggest pegging him and in no time you’ll be “regretting” your decision.what can i say,he likes being in charge and likes it when you remember☺️
𝐓𝐞𝐜𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐮
When you suggest it to him,he thinks for a bit before nodding. He’d love to help you try new things while also trying something new for himself! He’s perfect like that☺️.isn’t particularly vocal but his breaths are heavy. If he says anything its, “y/n~ hnghhh~youre so~hnuhhh” if you use a vibrating strap, the moment you turn it on,he groans before it turns into a lowly moaned “fuck~” definitely gasps every few seconds when you rub his g-spot. Oh also doesnt mind you pulling his hair a little.Tecchou is a badass in the streets,but your little princess in the sheets and neither of you would change it for the world.
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Tag-List : @diagonal-queen , @sapphic-serenade
All rights reserved © 2023 pillow-princess-diaries. Please do not repost, modify or claim as yours.
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nikoruistyping · 2 years ago
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Better Hold Your Breathe || Spencer Reid
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Spencer Reid x Fem!reader​
Summary: You had hoped to have a nice normal morning but its nothing but normal at the BAU and next thing you know you end up locked in the Evidence Room with none other than Spencer Reid, your coworker and crush. As time passes Spencer starts to have a panic attack and there was only one thing you could think of to help stop it...
TW: Fluff, Coworkers to Lovers Relationship, Kissing, Playful Banter, Jealous Spencer, Derek calling you Babygirl as a joke, Depictions of a Panic Attack due to Claustrophobia
Word Count: 2.5K?
A/N: This fic is my annual bday present for my best friend so happy bday my queen and I hope you enjoy this fic as much as I did making it for you. I hope your MGG thirst is quenched with this one even though its not really a smutty piece since I ended up changing my plot/idea last minute because I wasnt happy with my writing at all and I’m rusty so I’m sorry if its not as good as my other pieces. THIS IS ALSO MY FIRST CRIMINAL MINDS/SPENCER FIC SO SORRY IF HE SOUNDS A BIT OUT OF CHARACTER I TRIED YALL. BEFORE ANY ONE COMMENTS AND COMES FOR ME YES THIS WAS INSPIRED BY THE STILES & LYDIA KISS FROM TEEN WOLF 3x11 SO SHUT UP I KNOW!
Coffee holder in hand you used your hip to push the glass double doors to the BAU open. You had purposely gone to the coffee shop early that morning so that you could order not only yourself a cup but to also get one for Spencer, who also happened to be the one guy in the BAU that you had the biggest crush on ever since the first day you joined. By some miracle you had remembered his order by heart and it was stupid that you were remembering such little things about him but that's what you do when you really like someone that much right? You tried to convince yourself that watching him make his coffee step by step every morning in the kitchen wasn't creepy at all but next thing you knew you were taking notes about what milk he used and how many sugars he would put inside his cup.
You shook your head at the silly thought and happily you walked over to your desk with the biggest smile on your face ready to take on the rest of the day. Penelope took notice from across the room as she walked in at the same time as you and she lightly nudged your shoulder.
"Well someone looks extra chipper this morning." She commented pushing up her pink colored glasses.
"Aren't I always happy every time I walk into work?" You question raising your eyebrow at her.
"Usually you are but I'm guessing that it has to do with the fact that you bought two coffees...I'm pretty sure that's not all for you." She says with a sly smirk on her lips since she is clearly the best hacker in the BAU there is, but your crush on Spencer was blatantly obvious that she didn't need to hack into brain to know that information.
"Bold of you to assume that Penelope." You say trying to look away but you weren't always the best at hiding your feelings.
"Oh come on, you know I'm right and I'm pretty sure that coffee is for a special someone that we all know you have the biggest crush on." She says with a small roll of her eyes at how it was pointless for you to deny it at this point.
"Fine! Fine...I did get him a coffee but it's just a coffee and that's it, nothing more I promise." You say as you lie to not only yourself but to Penelope who wasn't believing a word that you were saying at all but she just gave you a look of disbelief as she saw Derek across the room and waved hello to him.
"Whatever you say Y/N. Just promise me that eventually you will make a move or else I'll do it for you." She said with a nudge to your shoulder again which just made you chuckle at her declaration.
"I pinky promise, you happy now Penelope?" You say a bit reluctantly.
"Much better. I'll see you in ten minutes in the meeting room, Hotch gave us a new case so I have to prepare." She says as she parts ways with you and heads to her office as you make your way to your desk which of course happened to be right across from Spencer's and it was extremely hard to focus all day looking at his pretty face twenty four seven.
You were surprised to see another coffee cup on your desk with a little sticky note attached to the lid and it instantly made you smile. The closer you got you set down the holder and looked across to Spencer’s desk but he was nowhere in sight. You carefully took the sticky note off the lid and started to read it to yourself.
Y/N,
Hope I got the order right and enjoy.
- Spencer Reid aka Your Favorite Desk Neighbor
His little note made you smile from ear to ear and you could help but pick up the cup and take a small sip. To your surprise he really did get your order right, you hadn't expected him to be so observant but then again he would have a job if that was the case right?
As you look up you see Spencer walking in your direction and when your eyes met his you tried your best to keep your composure and waved to him, his footsteps getting closer until he seemed to park himself right in front of your desk.
"Morning Spence. I-Um...thanks for the coffee that's really thoughtful of you." You admit taking another sip as you glanced over his beautiful facial features.
"Morning Y/N," His reply a controlled stutter, barely keeping it together while you inched closer to where he was leaning against the desk.
He accepted the pipping hot cup you bought him with a whispered thank you. You were excited to see his reaction and you had your fingers crossed that you remembered every detail of his order.
"Did I get it right?" You asked with an eager attitude and smile on your face while you tried to hide behind your coffee cup.
"Surprisingly enough you-" His words were interrupted by Derek coming up from behind and shaking his shoulders playfully.
"Good Morning you two," He said greeting us as he looked at all the coffee cups on your desk and furrowed his eyebrows.
"Looks like you two decided to throw a coffee party and not invite anyone. I'm taking this as compensation." He says with a laugh and grabbing the cup of coffee you had bought for yourself.
"I-I'll allow that but you owe me next time Derek." You say taking a sip and gritting your teeth a bit in anger but not letting it get the best of you.
"Fine I'll get you one next time babygirl," He said with a smirk and a little playful wink which made you flustered for a quick moment since it was out of character for him to ever call you that, that was always his thing with Penelope. You glanced at Spencer and his gaze seemed frustrated and angry, his knuckles almost turning white as he gripped the coffee cup harder. You couldn't quite read what was on his mind since he never was the best at showing or expressing his emotions. It was clear he was upset maybe jealous even.
"Oh come on now, I'm just playing no need to get all flustered. I'll see you both in the meeting room in ten." He said patting Spencer on the shoulder seeing as he made no comments at all about the interaction.
Before you could try and bounce back from the awkwardness Derek had instilled into your conversation with Spencer this morning felt like it couldn't get any worse until you got a call on your desk phone and you picked up.
"Hey Y/N, I need you to go into the evidence room and bring me a few boxes of evidence. Looks like its so old and outdated that its not in the computer system yet," Penelope explained over the phone.
"Penelope really?! Is it that urgent that it needs to be right now?" You question in a bit of an annoyed tone in your voice being as nothing seemed to be going as planned this morning.
"Yes Y/N it is! Pretty pretty please I won't ask you for any other favors for the whole day I promise," She pleaded and well you couldn't say no to your best friend in the whole department.
"Fine I'll go. Just text me the record box numbers and I'll go get them." You said letting out a breath as you nervously played with phone cord.
"Make sure to bring Spencer or Derek with you. The boxes are pretty heavy and good luck!" She hung up quickly before you could even say another word in protest but you accepted that this was basically defeat at this point.
You put the phone down hanging up and you give Spencer a look that makes him immediately curious. After with whatever just happened with Derek there was no way you were bringing him as a helping hand. You hated to admit it but the evidence room was extremely dark and scary looking to go into by yourself so it put you at ease that maybe Spencer would tag along.
"So...Spencer I need your help to go get some boxes from the evidence room. Are you in?" You ask taking one last sip of the delicious coffee and putting it down.
"Yeah, yeah of course I'll help." He quickly responds without hesitation as he followed your lead around the office and towards the direction of the room.
After what seemed like an eternity of silence between the two of you, he finally broke it the moment you reached your destination.
"I didn't know you and Derek had a 'thing' going on. I just always assumed him and Penelope were more into each other because of that ridiculous petname he calls her which honestly I think is a violation against having a healthy and safe work place environment-" He was fumbling his words as he rambled on about how he just couldn't imagine you and Derek being together.
"If it makes you feel any better Derek and I aren't a 'thing'. We never were. I don't know why he called me babygirl...it felt wrong but I know he was just probably joking with me to get on my nerves or something." You admit as you turn the rusty old doorknob after fussing with the keylock and open the door slowly.
"Wait...really so you aren't into him?" He questions while following your lead into the very lowly lit room that was filled with hundreds of boxes on dusty shelves.
"Make sure to hold the door open or else it will-" You spoke a bit too late because before you knew it you heard the door close and lock behind the both of you.
"-lock us in." You finish your sentence and Spencer looks behind him seeing as the door had really locked you two in there for who knows how long now.
"You should have warned me beforehand."
"How was I suppose to warn you beforehand if you had me distracted with something else?!"
"Jesus now we are stuck in here and Y/N you know how much I hate small dark enclosed spaces! This is literally my worst nightmare right now!" He exclaimed as his breathing seemed to get faster and he put his hand to his chest that was heaving up and down quickly. Spencer was having a panic attack and you weren't sure what to do.
"Hold on Spence, let me just call Penelope I'm sure she can help us." You say quickly fumbling with your phone, trying to put on the flashlight and finding her contact to call her as soon as possible.
"PENELOPE!" You scream into the phone in a panic.
"AH! Y/N why are you screaming into my headpiece right now?!"
"Spencer and I are stuck in the evidence room and he is having a panic attack right now so what do I do?! Can you get us out of here please!" You begged.
"Oh god…ok so this wasn't how this was suppose to go!" She replies back quickly.
"Penelope what are you talking about?! Did you plan this?"
"Well I wasn't planning on the door locking but I wanted to give you the right moment to make your move on Spencer but not like this!"
"Penelope I'm going to seriously unfriend you after this."
"I'm sorry! I'm gonna try and fix this right now just give me a few minutes, I will call you back right away."
"Is everything ok?" Spencer asks in-between quick and heavy breaths now that he has resorted to sitting on the floor while he tries to control his breathing but sadly all the dust and darkness isn't really helping at all and he seemed to be clutching his chest.
"We will get out of here soon, don't worry about that right now, just focus on me Spence." You say sitting in front of him and trying to do something but you didn't know what to do that could help in this situation.
His breathing only got quicker the more he seemed to panic and at that point you got an idea but maybe it was worth the risk of whatever would come afterwards but you decided to just do it anyways.
"Hey! Spencer look at me...just look at me..." Your voice trailed off as you seemed to lean in closer to him, your hands cupping his face, being pricked by his stubble as you made eye contact with him despite the lighting situation.
Without even having to think twice you quickly closed the gap between the both of you and your lips met his. At first he was completely stunned you could tell by his reaction since his teeth seemed to clash with yours but as you both eased into it a wave of relief hit his body and he was completely relaxed. You didn't let go of him only bringing him as close as humanly possible while your lips moved gently against his. Before the both of you almost ran out of breathe you slowly pulled away, his forehead leaning against yours as you were surprised with yourself that you even did something like that to begin with.
Spencer's eyes seemed to be darting everywhere looking at you but then looking all over your entire face, still in shock that you flat out kissed him.
"How...How did you do that?" He whispered out into the small space between you both.
"I-Uh...I read once that holding your breathe can stop a panic attack," You paused for a small moment almost getting lost in his brown eyes as you tried to focus on trying to shamelessly explain yourself.
"So when I kissed you...you held your breathe."
"I-I did?" He asked almost in disbelief that he even had the chance to kiss you.
"Yeah...you did."
"Thanks...you know that's really smart..." His voice trailed off almost echoing but you could help but blush and feeling absolutely flustered by the whole situation.
"Well I just-I read it somewhere and I felt a bit helpless not being able to help you so I thought this must be the only way." You twiddled your thumbs in your lap looking down as you bit your lip, it still tasting of coffee except it seemed more bitter tasting.
"Must be the only way, hmm," He hummed a bit in disbelief at your explanation but he reached his hand out to hold yours and gently squeezed.
"Do you believe now that I definitely don't have a 'thing' with Derek?" You question squeezing his hand right back as you couldn't help but smile at him despite not being able to see him too well in the darkness.
"I don't know I might need you to verify one more time just to make sure." He says with a chuckle coming off his lips.
"Wow you're much cheekier than I thought Spence." You say giggling a bit to yourself.
"You know when we finally get out of here do you maybe want to go to dinner with me sometime? I mean only if you want to-" He was still nervous and somehow stuttered out his sentence but you just pulled him in for a hug and kissed his cheek in the process.
"Yes, I would love that Spence." You say with a smile on your face as you squeeze him tightly in your arms.
Eventually Penelope came to the rescue with a giant crowbar in hand as she pried the door open, breaking the lock in the process. You had never seen Spencer happier to go into the meeting room and go straight to work in his entire life. Now that you both were finally out of the evidence room the next hurdle to jump over was to finally go on your first date with him knowing that it was confirmed that you two both had feelings for each other and it was a plus that he was a really good kisser too.
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fyodorslave · 2 years ago
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how about ex-husband geto hcs? 🥺💕
YES MA'AM (I saw this request awfully late, you probably forgot about it too but, in any case, here ya go)
♡ ♡ ♡
+ characters: getou suguru x reader
+ tw: suggestive content
♡ ♡ ♡
⇀ No stranger would assume that you two were separated, you can't blame them, he's always glued to your side. going grocery shopping? he'll come with. need someone to mow the lawn? dial his number. picking your kid up from day care? a parent mustn't go alone! it doesn't help that your son loves his dad.
⇀ Divorce to you always meant avoidance at all costs. you never though your own divorce would mean that your ex-husband is at your house more often then when you two were married.
⇀ Perhaps it was taunting at his end, to show you that divorce was a mistake. but you can't exactly tell him to kick rocks when he's fixing that lightbulb your too short to reach. Shirtless with his baggy sweats hanging off of his toned hips, v-line teasing you as he unscrews the bulb.
⇀ While he does always show up at the perfect time of your distress, his only reason isn't to woo you and win you back. he understands how hard it is to manage being a single mother, so he'll do everything he can to make sure he has at-least a 50/50 contribution.
⇀ Even if it has nothing to do with your kid. if you even utter the word, 'help' he will show up faster than God himself.
⇀ Your resolve weakens when you come home every night and see your kid sleeping in the lap of the man your trying not to love. He'd watch TV on low volume, eyes fixated on something about home renovation while softly rubbing your kids back.
⇀ Washing the dishes is something even divorce can't convince him to do, so he'll prop himself upon the kitchen bench at night, and watch you load the dishwasher.
⇀ When your done with what's meant to be his chore, he makes sure to thank you in strange ways for a divorced couple.
⇀ He'd pull you so that you are in-between his legs, which are dangling off the edge, and lift your chin up to kiss you. just like he did on your wedding night.
⇀ Getou would do anything to protect his family, raising his eyebrows at those who think you have suddenly become available. He says married and divorced are just worthless labels. What do mere labels have against the way he coaxes orgasms after orgasms out of you, behind closed doors once he's done reading your kid a bedtime story.
⇀ dare you mention your single, and he's already there, bottoming out of you, as your thighs shake for mercy around his hips.
⇀ And by the time you wake up in the morning, with aching legs and a warm embrace. your smiling into getous chest, thinking maybe he deserves a second chance.
♡ ♡ ♡
send more headcanon requests yall this was so much fun! HEADCANONS ONLY PLEASE I HATE WRITING ONE-SHOTS BYE.
ʕ•ᴥ•ʔノ♡
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jaelaxies · 1 year ago
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𝟕:𝟎𝟕 𝐚𝐦
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✧・゚: *✧・゚:*    *:・゚✧*:・゚✧✧・゚: *✧・゚:*    *:・゚✧*:・゚✧✧・゚: *✧・゚:*    *:・
fluff; wc.: 476.
Kim Jiwoong x fem reader!; fluff fluff; established relationship and skinship; tw: none.
Song recommendation: You’re Beautiful — The Rose (Dual)
Nobody expected this. It was, indeed, a sight to see.
Kim Jiwoong, the tall gorgeous “mysterious” man who every girl in this faculty would drop everything for, was standing like a giant puppy with an enormous lovesick grin while you buttoned his coat, which he had unbuttoned on purpose on the way here, just to see your focused expression: the way you pursued your lips together and bit your tongue a little bit, the soft lines on your forehead and the lovely smile you gifted him when you were done. Your height difference made everything just so much funnier and cuter at the same time, because to thank you with a soft kiss on the forehead, he had to lean down a bit but that gave him the perfect excuse to whisper something only the two of you could hear; making your cheeks go dusty rose and his eyes crinkle with pure joy, his ears matching your colored cheeks.
—I really won the lottery in my past life, babe — As you recovered yourself from the cheesy remark, your hand immediately pinched his cheek, even though softly, he laughed at your weak attempt to get revenge.
—You did, indeed. — Carefully you draped your own scarf around his neck, finishing it in a bow. Red really suited Jiwoong but it was your soft strawberry scent emanating from the fabric and the sweet but firm tone of your words what made his heart race a mile per minute. — But I must admit I am a pretty lucky girl too… I have the cutest boyfriend ever. 
You tiptoed and pecked him on the lips, rushing him to enter the classroom for his final; but Jiwoong stood there smiling like an idiot and wondering what on earth did he do to deserve your pure and honest love; to him, you were too much of a woman and sometimes he just seemed like an idiot beside you; but it was never the case for you, who carefully grabbed his hand, brought it to your lips and kissed it softly; proudly showing him his new “good luck charm” the stain from your lipstick, which was one of his favorites. — Whatever the result is, I’m already proud of you, ok? No worries, you’ll do great. I believe in you!
When he was finally about to enter, he rushed to your position and softly cupped your cheeks pecking your lips so quickly, you barely felt the contact; before disappearing again through the door with a wide grin showing his pearly white teeth. You reached for your lips and smiled too, some way and somehow, he always needed to kiss you last, but it didn’t matter too much, because right now, the lavender haze that was your head was filled with thoughts of your boyfriend and how happy you were to have him by your side.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*    *:・゚✧*:・゚✧✧・゚: *✧・゚:*    *:・゚✧*:・゚✧✧・゚: *✧・゚:*    *:・
૮꒰ྀི⸝⸝> . <⸝⸝꒱ྀིა finally i can write about my bias!! The way i blush everytime i think about this man... take me to delulu station right now.
tmi: If you're a fellow zerose, who is your bias? im very curious, also i like to know more friends in this fandom because it's a blast ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧
Because it's also my first time writing for him i thought something sweet and fluffy was perfect for the ocassion i think i managed to do it, but still feedback is always appreciated ♡
Btw, I'm currently working on a project involving fantasy... it's for a member of enhypen... can you guess who?
Anyways, thank you all so much for all the love and support!
I promise to put even more effort in creating joyful projects for you guys to read, love yall ૮꒰ྀི∩´ ᵕ `∩꒱ྀིა
With all the love in the world,
ੈ✩‧˚✧˖°࿐Stella!
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*    *:・゚✧*:・゚✧✧・゚: *✧・゚:*    *:・゚✧*:・゚✧✧・゚: *✧・゚:*    *:・
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im-not-a-l0ser · 1 year ago
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Hey, so do yall remember that fic idea I talked about a lil bit ago, about Max being in love with Richie pre-transition, and then falling in love with him post transition without him even knowing? Yeah, so I wrote a prologue
Sorry if you don't wanna be tagged, I'm just tagging those who seemed most interested: @boykisserbunny @petes-5yr-cocoa @chaosbrinker @inprisonforsparkling
I didn't decide on a deadname for him, so I hope the way I wrote it is okay.
TW- Bullying, icky behaviour, ghosting(?)
It all started with her.
She's the reason Max ever got violent in the first place.
"Stupid fuckin nerd!" Max once heard. He didn't think much of it. People got bullied every day.
"That's kind of a-an oxymoron, don't you think?" He heard a meek voice say.
Fuck. If some motherfucker was messing with her, Max was gonna break some bones.
"Who're you callin a moron!"
"No, that's not— Eep!" A familiar squeak echoed through the halls before the sound of a fist splatting against the concrete wall rang out.
Max turned the corner.
She was pressed against the wall, although it mostly seemed to be hwr doing at this point, she'd definately been bracketed there before. Despite hearing only one voice, there were three guys. One of them was clutching his hand.
"That's it, you fuckin smartass—"
"Hey!" Max yelled. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"
"We're just teaching this nerd a lesson," One of the guys said. "She shouldn't be such a nerdy prude," He said, running his hand down her arm for a second before she shoved it off.
"Fuck off," She grumbled. She was behaving like this wasn't unfamiliar for her.
"Yeah," Max said. "Fuck off." The third guy laughed.
"Or what?" He asked. "Dunno if you noticed, but it's one on three."
She threw her hands up slightly, annoyed.
Technically, she's the one who initiated it.
She swung her backpack as hard as she could into his groin, immediately sending him groaning on the ground.
She smiled for a second before the second guy went for her. She squeaked again before crouching down.
Nothing to worry about though. He was quickly knocked away by Max, as well as the first guy, just in case he wanted to try something again.
"Nice one by the way," Max said as she stood back up. She dusted herself off and swung her bag over her shoulder.
"Thanks for the help," She said.
She always did that. She never thanked him for saving her, never acted helpless. She wasn't helpless. She just wasn't enough on her own. Max completed that.
After that, Max left her side even less. Apparently it wasn't the first time it'd happened. In fact, it seemed like that'd been a reoccurring thing for weeks now. Not anymore, if Max had anything to do with it. Which he would.
Despite not dating, not wanting people to think they're dating, and constantly fighting the accusations that they're dating, Max would swing his arm around her shoulders now to make sure that other guys knew she was spoken for.
Not that she was. He just hoped it was enough to protect her if he wasn't around.
He gave her official and explicit permission to claim they were dating if she so needed to, like if she was being pursued by someone she didn't like and they wouldn't take no for an answer.
Unfortunately, for some people that just got their motor running more.
In those situations, Max advised that she fought them off as well as she could, and called him as soon as she thought they'd be too much for her alone. He'd drop anything to be there for her.
Max didn't see her the entire last week of eighth grade. He was getting worried. He'd ask around, but people would tease him, saying he should know, since they were dating, and that she finally decided to off herself.
That second one hit too close to home.
He went to her house a week into summer, after many text messages and a warning that he was going to do so.
A man answered the door. He kind of looked like her, in a vague way, but Max knew this wasn't her dad.
"I'm here to see..."
"Uh," The guy started, looking confused. "I don't know anyone with that name. Sorry."
"You... what?" Max asked, his brain breaking. He was already so close to the edge.
Two weeks with no contact at all. It was starting to scare him more than he was okay with.
"I've never heard that name before. Sorry," He said. "That's my last name, Matthews. But that's all I got."
"No, sh-she lives here. She's always lived here!" Max tried to lunge forward into the house, but the man blocked him.
"I think you should leave now, young man," He said.
Max yelled her name until his voice hurt, and the man managed to push him away long enough to shut and lock the door.
He banged on it for a while before giving up.
He sat on the porch for a while before working up the energy and motivation to leave.
What happened to her... it was like she disappeared off the face of the earth and no one even cared or noticed.
That had to have been her uncle or big brother or something, they had the same last name! How was this fair, where had she gone!
She was Max’s only real friend. His only true friend. Sure, the football team and the basketball team, but she knew more about his life and feelings than they ever would.
Not to mention, he only hung out with them out of necessity, especially the ones that had tried to hurt her.
Without her, what was even the point of trying to be decent.
In all honesty, Max liked the fear he generated. He liked that he could look at someone the right way and make them flinch. He liked knowing he could protect her.
He needed to show her that. He did his best, while still showing he could take care of her.
Okay, sure. Maybe the accusations and the lies were right, Max was in love with her.
A lot of good that did him now.
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theheraldsrest · 1 year ago
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“Romanced!Companions reacting to the Inquisitor’s Death”
Are yall ready to hurt? No? Good! It’s a bit long so hang in there. 
(Psst. If you really hate your soul, you should read this with the song Stuff We Did-Married Life or Experience by Ludovico Einaudi. It hurts.)
-(Sad) Lord Lex
TW: Blood, death, slight gore
It was during battle, a battle that had been planned thoroughly to the last detail yet the enemy surprised you. You were strong, that was true of all the things you’d accomplished and how many near-death experiences you survived. But as you were overwhelmed, you were taking one too many injuries and wounds, one right after another. It didn’t help that whatever magic was leftover from the anchor was slowly starting to seep into you, weakening you. For the first time, you were falling in combat. Not the usual “I’ve been knocked down but I’ve got health potions aplenty to bring me back up.” No, this time, you ran out and your compatriots were too far from you. You could hear them yell for you, trying their damndest to get to you. You could feel your grasp on your life slipping away when they came running to you…
Cullen
His blood ran cold as he watched you hit the ground, not moving an inch. The world seemed to slow down around him as he struggled and slashed through the enemies lines, not even hearing his own voice as he called for his men, to help you, to save you. Finally, finally, he reached you and pulled your body into his arms. Cullen’s hands immediately went to your potion pouch and, finding it empty, went to his. His fingers clasped around nothing and he could feel his stomach dropping as he looked back to you, watching the light shine dimly in your eyes. “Please. Please no, don’t do this.” He pleaded, clutching your hand to his heart because that was yours, that was what he had to give you and he would give anything if he could somehow just give you some of the strength or blood from his heart to yours. But he couldn’t. And he knew he couldn’t do anything, it was too late. That small smile on your beautiful face as your reassurances fell on deaf ears, trying to reassure him that he’ll be alright, that you love him, that you always have- that light in your eyes that he always admired died out, the remnants of your smile left on your face and your hand falling limp in his own grip. You were gone but he remained, holding you and staying by your side as he had promised so long ago. Even as the battle seemed to be concluding and his soldiers tried to comfort their commander, he sat there holding your lifeless form close to him, mumbling prayers that he knew deep down wouldn’t find anyone. “Please Inqu-My love, please. Come back. Y-You can’t- I-I need you. I-I can’t-”
Josephine
The most broken-hearted, chest clenching scream you’ve ever heard. She had been traveling with your group in case there was a chance of negotiations, immediately being pulled to cover when the fighting started. Now, Josey struggled against her own guards to get to you, no care for the danger around her. As your forces pushed back the enemy, she finally got herself free and ran to you, one hand flying to your heart and the other to your wounds. She’s yelling over her shoulder for a healer as she feels your faint heartbeat, barely there but enough to reassure her. To make her think you’ll make it. Because if you don’t then you’ll- She can’t finish that thought. She’s hoping against hope that it doesn’t come to that. She doesn’t even notice the tears on her face as a healer runs over and starts to try and save you. You try to talk to her but she hushes you, telling you “Do not push yourself. You can tell me once they heal you and we get back to safety.” That idea is quickly taken away as she looks at the healer who gives her a sorrowful look and shakes their head. It feels as if all the air is taken from her lungs as she looks back at you, her eyes terrified and sad. She’s begging the healer, almost demanding that they try everything but even she knows they have done all they could. Josephine can only clutch your face, tears falling onto your cheeks. When she finally talks again, it’s to talk about the future she wanted to share with you. A sad smile on her face as she tells you how she wanted you to officially meet her family, of all the places she wanted to go with you, the things that you two could’ve done. How she wanted a family with you. Even as life drains from your body and your eyes glass over, she’s still near you, laying against your chest with her head where your heartbeat would be. “Goodbye, my dearest. Be safe, wherever you go.”
Solas
Solas had been watching from a distance, as he always did, trying but failing not to worry about you. He loved watching your battles, coming out victorious and celebrating with your companions. But this time, he was holding his breath. He knew you could get yourself out of even the toughest of situations. But more and more enemies appeared and soon you were lost from his sight. His eyes flickered over the masses, trying to stay where you were as he tried to stop his hammering heart. She’s alright, he told himself, she’s fought worse. As the last of the enemies are killed, soldiers and your friends alike are panicking, calling out for you and searching. He has to stop himself from going down there, not for them but for you. It’s always been for you since that first moment with you. And there amongst them he can see Varric, who has completely stopped and was staring at the ground a few feet in front of him. No trace of a smile or laughter upon his face that Solas had come to associate with him. Varric, who trusted him and had encouraged Solas to speak with you…was completely frozen. It was minutes before Varric yelled something, the others rushing over. Another moment, angry yells and horrible cries coming up from your small group. One of them picked you up, to take you to a healer. At least, that was the lie that played in his head. He could see you weren’t moving, you weren’t speaking to the others, joking about the tough battle. No, you were slumped against them, your arms hanging limply. Even from where he stood, he could tell that the brightness that would light up others was gone, leaving a dark bleak gray cloud over your party. The strings of his heart tugged and he knew but refused to admit it. Solas turned, blocking out the cries and saying his last goodbye. “Ir abelas, ma vhenan. Ar lath.” Because he was leaving, nothing more. He would see you again because you weren’t gone. You can’t be. You said you wanted to prove him wrong, to come with him. Then prove him wrong. Move.
Cassandra
Cassandra was trying her hardest to protect everyone, calling out orders and putting herself into danger to stop a fatal blow being delivered to your companions. Her thoughts kept flickering back to you, trying desperately but failing to not worry about you. You were the Inquisitor, after all. You’ve been through the fade and have even fought an arch demon. What could possibly stop you? Your recklessness popped into her head and if it was any other situation, she might’ve laughed. Screams and shouts came from further away and she saw some of your soldiers being overwhelmed before you burst through and started to help defend them. She almost turned away, almost. One of the larger demons was bearing down on you, swinging its ax around and towards your body. She thought it missed. It didn’t. The splatter of blood on the ground and your pained cries as it buried its weapon into the shoulder of your good arm. It pulled back and was ready to chop at the rest of you when a shield hit its head. The demon turned into time before it was cut down by a raging Cassandra. She stood over you, trying to protect you from further harm. “Heal yourself, Inquisitor! I am here!” She fought off more of the creatures not noticing that you weren’t moving to drink a potion. When she glanced down at you, she called over her shoulder again “Inquisitor! Hurry! You’re losing blood!” Still you didn’t move. You couldn’t. Your arm could barely twitch and, even if it could fully move, you knew you were out of health potions. Seeing you simply staring at her made her grow concerned. As she stepped back and a soldier took over, she whipped around to you and kneeled. Noting the blood rushing down your arm, she tried to get you to move it but stopped when you winced. When she noticed your empty potion bag, she reached for hers but remembered she had given the remainder to those who were near her. “The Inquisitor needs help! Get him a potion or a healer! Quickly!” She was jolted from her commands as your hand touched her cheek, turning to look at you. Your hand was shaking and your face was scrunched up in pain but there was a smile on your face. You made a comment on how beautiful she was and how you were honored to be a part of something with her. To be married to her. To love her. Cassandra’s breath caught, not because of the lovely things you said but because it sounded like you were trying to get your last words out. “Inquisitor, you’re talking nonsense! Stay still, I’m going to try and patch up the bleeding-” But you shake your head and you asked her something. Does she love you? “What?! Do not be talking about such ridiculous things right now! We have to-!” But you cut her off, almost pleading with her to answer you. It was a moment before she said quietly “Yes. Yes, I do, my love.” Could you please say it, you asked. She hesitated, her voice shaky as she spoke. “I love you.” If only you hadn’t been in the middle of battle, she would’ve been blushing furiously at the big smile on your face. That’s nice, you said as your head leaned forward, laying it against her shoulder. You told her how you wanted to make sure she was happy before….before you….She waited but you said nothing. It was another moment before Cassandra turned her head to look down at you, eyes closed and a smile on your face but unmoving. She was completely frozen, unmoving and not wanting to believe the reality that was in front of her. “Dear heart? Inquisitor, I-” She could only bring her shaky hands up to your back and your head, gently petting it down as the battle around you both raged on. “...Thank you, Inquisitor. Just…rest. I will protect you.”
The Iron Bull
“Anyone seen the boss?” Bull was starting to feel something in the pit of his stomach, the uncommon emotion of worry. You were at his side fighting and then gone the next second. Your other companions and the Chargers were searching the battlefield, trying to find any sign of you. He didn’t even notice his hand fidgeting with the dragon tooth you gave him so long ago. It was taking a damn good long time for you to pop up. Perhaps you had tried to flank them? A million ideas came to his head, trying not to picture the worst. His name was called out suddenly and he turned, relief coming over him as he looked at your silhouette, a smile and a cheeky comic coming to his lips. It was stopped, though, as you stumbled down the hill before falling. He moved quickly to catch you so that you didn’t hit the ground. Trying to hold you up, he could only watch as you leaned further into him. Bull tried to question, to examine you, but as his hand touched your side he could feel something warm and wet. His hands were covered in your blood, spilling from a stab wound to your side as well as from an injury on your head. “I’ve got you, kadan. Let’s get you to a healer and we can-” You stopped him, your hand on his cheek to keep him looking at you. You told him you weren’t gonna make it, you’d taken too many hits and the magic in your body was tearing you apart. He stared at you, his one good eye looking between both of yours, eyes that he had come to adore. “Are you sure?” His voice was quiet, low, stiff. Never had you heard him take this tone before, as if he didn’t want to believe you but was still just a soldier listening to their commander. He wanted to argue against it, tell you that you’re being dramatic. But he knew better. You nodded, tears welling up in your eyes as you asked him to look out for your friends, to be safe while you were gone and not to push the Chargers too hard. He chuckled but it was stiff as he held you up, keeping you from fully falling to the ground. He could only hold you safely in his arms as he asked him not to forget you. “That’ll be a bit hard, boss. Not possible to forget someone like you. You’ve done too many crazy things for me to just forget you.” You could feel your time was coming and you asked the Iron Bull one more thing. Just a kiss, that was it. One more for the road, you joked. This time, his laugh was anything but him. It was sad, full of grief but he fulfilled that promise and tried to make it as gentle as possible, one of his rare ones as if he was trying not to break you. You were gone before you could feel the teardrop on your face when he pulled away. He tightened his grip around you, as if he could still protect you from harm. “Until I join you again…kadan.”
Dorian
Both him and Vivienne were keeping up the front, trying to slow their ascent. He was able to keep most foes away from him, a good distance of magic throwing them around and stopping them in their tracks. At the same time, he was trying to keep an eye on you, to make sure they weren’t getting too close to you. It was what he always did, just to make sure you were safe. Both mages were having a bit of banter as they fought on. “Dorian, dear, if I didn’t know any better, I would say your casting seems a little off. Been putting off practicing? Or losing your touch?” He knew it was just her way of trying to keep both of them going and clear minded. “Madame, you wish.” A pained yell could be heard, a voice so familiar to him carried across the battlefield.  No, he thought, I only turned away for a second as he whipped his head around and looked to spot where he had last seen you but you were gone. Vivienne said something but he was gone, running through the enemy lines and pushing them away, electrocuting anyone who got in his way. As soon as he reached you kneeling on the ground, he threw up a barrier and knelt next to you, reaching out to help you up. Another scream of pain came from you as he looked down, a deep cut into your abdomen and an arrow in your leg halting your escape. “Amatus, be strong for me. I’m trying to help you.” His body was growing weary from the magic he’d been using up, but he put what he had left into trying to heal you. As soon as he felt the spell end, he looked back to you….but nothing was fixed. You were still in pain and you were falling, growing weak. “No, that was supposed to help you. Why didn’t it-?” He looked into your face and could see you growing pale, green marks gracing your cheeks from your neck. Magic like that of the anchor. It was stopping him from healing you, from keeping you alive. “Someone, help! The Inquisitor is down! Please!” He didn’t even notice that he was begging as he struggled with his emotions, trying to find anything to keep you alive, to keep you awake and looking at him. “Don’t do this, dearest. You’ll be fine. You’re strong. You can fight it off.” As you grew tired, you could only clutch his hand and thank him. Thank him and tell him you loved him. “No, stop that. This isn’t goodbye. We still have much to do. I-I can’t…I can’t let you go like this. You don’t deserve this.” As he held your head in his lap, he could feel your hand come up and try to brush the tears away from his eyes. “Please, Amatus. I love you. You need to stay. You make these stupid things possible.” Dorian holds your hand to his cheek, one of the only people he let close to him in his whole life slipping from his fingers. “Don’t leave me.” 
Sera
“47! Watch it, you shank spool arsehole!” It had started as a game for you two, counting how many enemies you both would take down. It made it easier for you two, taking out the enemy as fast as possible, as well as allowing Sera to focus on the task at hand. “How you doing, Inky?” No response but that was ok. Sometimes she got a bit aways from you in battle. Just gave her more idiots to take out. Eventually they started falling back, Sera pleased with herself at a high 132 mark. She started turning this way and that, looking for you, but the longer she searched the more her smile started to fade. “Inky! Where the hell you go?” It was starting to grow irksome that she couldn’t see you among the soldiers and your companions, walking around and talking. Maybe you had already started on your way back to camp? She was considering the idea, passing through the bodies when something caught her eye. One of the bigger brutes she had shot was moving but not normal like. Almost as if someone was- “Hold on a bit,” She grumbled as she pushing on the hulking mass, Finally their body rolled over and there was her Inky in all their- “Thought you left me over ther-” You were lying in a pool of blood. Her first thought was that the brute bled all over you. But the arrow hadn’t pierced that far through and the sword that was in her side seemed to- You could see her face flip through emotions so quickly, from confusion to surprise to panic. “Shit! Shit, shit, shit!” Sera scrambled to try and stop the blood, looking to your potion pouch for a potion, but saw it empty. She never carried any with her. She always had you or Dorian near her just in case. She was starting to regret that decision as she tore some cloth from one of the enemy's clothes and used that to try and stop the blood. “Come on, wifey/hubby. We’ve been through worse, yeah?” She hadn’t even noticed her hands were shaking, blood covering them and her dumb little band of gold that you gave her. It startled her when she noticed you were chuckling, mumbling about how your body count was 168. It was out of pure shock that she startled laughing, saying how stupid you were. She didn’t even notice as she tried to tie off the bandage around you that your hand had fallen from hers, her laughing at how dumb your guys game was as your smile remained on your face but your eyes closed. When the others finally find you both, she’s clutching your hand that has a stupid little matching band on it, crying and laughing. “You can’t just do that, you know? You can’t just try to make me laugh and then just-and then just leave. Regular folk don’t do that…they don’t…they…come back.”
Blackwall
He had tried to stay by your side, knocking any enemies away that got past your defense. He was your shield, after all. Both of you had lost sight of your forces and companions as the enemy line advanced, yet you stayed by each other’s sides. He had kept throwing his potions to you and putting himself in the way to make sure you at least would get out of this safe. As one enemy slipped past you and swiped their sword toward your side, it felt as if Blackwall moved in slow motion. He tried to throw himself between you two, raising his shield and bashing it against the foe’s sword, knocking them off balance. Why did it seem slow, though? Why did it feel like he failed? He turned to look back at you, to make sure you were ok. Your eyes were wide and mouth slightly agape. He couldn’t understand why you were surprised, he had done this many times before. You stumbled forward and fell against him and there in your back was an arrow, piercing through your armor and skin. He could feel the rage and terror building deep in his bones but it seemed…numb. Something hit his shoulder, something flowing down his back but he couldn’t care. He wrapped his arms around you, making sure his shield covered what his body couldn’t. If the enemy hit him, he couldn’t feel it. The yells around him seemed to fade away as he held you, your hands clutching the front of his armor. You were saying something but he couldn’t make it out. Instead, he continued to hold you tightly as if he could take away the pain, as if he could fight off death itself. Because he knew it was coming, he wasn’t gonna deny it. Perhaps he could keep it away just for a bit longer if you couldn’t be seen. He could feel you getting weaker, falling with you as you went to the ground. It almost seemed like no one was around either of you now. No more danger, you’re safe. You’re safe, he lied to himself. “I’ve got you, love.” Blackwall brought his face down and kissed the top of your head, making you turn your own face up to his so that he could steal one more gentle kiss from you. It was soft, gentle, sweet…and a goodbye as you pulled away and laid your head against his chest, your whole body relaxing into him. He simply placed his chin on top of your head, gently swaying to music only he could hear, humming as his thick beard hid his tears. “I’ve got you.”
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stillaclownlol · 1 year ago
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Aiden BPD headcanonsssss because my dad is being weird and I feel weird too
(Most of these are based on my experiences living with somebody who has bpd, and maybe myself but we won't talk about that haha)
Tw for all the things bpd tends to cover (self harm, abuse, substance abuse, and suicidal ideation, brief mention of cannabis in a medical context)
-definitely a big source of trauma is his parents basically abandoning him for long stretches of time
-Prone to splitting regarding them. When they're not around its so much easier to be like "Whatever, fuck them, I don't care." But when they *are* around, they're always so affectionate, a lot of "it's not their fault they're busy", "they don't mean it", kind of thoughts...it's okay Aiden, people can still love you even if they treat you badly :/
-y'all know he's self destructive. Yall KNOW. He's been in 7 different go-kart "accidents", once broke his hip trying to impersonate Tony Hawk, and he WILL be crashing his car into a tree after binge drinking.
-Self harms as a form of stimulation sometimes. He just gets SO bored. Usually will slam his head on the nearest hard object or cut himself with his compass.
-has been to a "wellness center" (mental hospital) after an episode where when his parents were on a trip, they returned and found him catatonic on his bed, he hadn't gotten up for almost 8 weeks and his mattress was stained with urine. Not to mention he'd gotten extremely sick after eating only Ramen. Called this a "blip" and hasn't done anything like this again, but only cuz he hated the hospital so much :/
-not really good at managing his anger. He gets pissed off easily (his jaw starts clenching), but has definitely eased off with the yelling and picking a fight with the person. May say some things he may or may not regret later :/ might like kick the wall or smth too-
-his feelings of emptiness and boredom get really exacerbated when he tries to sleep, so he just doesn't sleep until he passes out from exhaustion.
-extremely rare, but if he cries its almost never the appropriate time.
-his favorite person (and I mean this in the bpd way not just the usual way) was Ben, now it's Ashlyn. She asks Ben for advice sometimes on how to understand him better. Is trying to get better, but he just wants all of her attention all the time. He could make a soliloquy of all the things he loves about her. She's the one who pushed him to go back to therapy and told him "hey, I think you have somethinh"
-Weirdly protective but in a hands off way?? Even tho he really doesn't handle himself well? He knows his friends can take care of themselves but it doesn't stop him from running through the worst case scenario. Freaks out if people are late, especially if they're punctual. Also really defensive of them, they do no wrong in his eyes (except when they do :/)
-used to push people away to avoid disappointment or abandonment, especially because they needed to move so much. All his relationships were very superficial. Ghosted people a lot.
-Has chronic pain as an adult because of all the injuries he suffered through as a kid, not to mention his shitty posture. He takes painkillers, but they leave him zoned out and with even worse insomnia so he doesn't take them a lot. Sometimes uses medicinal weed if the pain is really bad. Ash tries to help by rubbing his back, though she says she's not that useful. He always feels better afterwards tho ❤️
-Smokes if he is really stressed, but he's ashamed about it and tries not to do it too much. Picked it up after stealing some of his mom's cigarettes when he was younger.
-his inner voice is extremely negative and he is generally under the impression that everybody hates him. Tries to act like this doesn't bother him and acts like a nuisance because if everybody hates him why even bother filtering his thoughts or actions?
-why were you even born? Who'd love a screw up like you? Your own parents didn't even want you.
-rejection sensitivity and gets really depressed if he's upset one of his friends. Will usually self harm to cope because he think lashing out will make things worse and he just doesn't know what else to do.
-he loves deeply and he's fiercely loyal. He's good with children. He's a wonderful artist. And he is so very incredibly kind. His bpd does not define him as a person.
I don't know if anybody needs to hear this, but, having BPD is not a death sentence. You're not doomed to be a bad person or an abuser, and I say this as somebody who was abused by someone with BPD (my own father). People with BPD are scared, they are struggling, and most of all, they're tired. If you or somebody you care about thinks they're have bpd, try to contact a doctor or specialist and seek professional help.
I'm gonna go cry in the shower now :)
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mega-bxtch · 21 days ago
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Hey guys I'm still writing, I'm still drawing, and i will go back to my usual posting schedule soon. But, there's something I want to tell yall about. You're more than welcome to not read, but if you have cats please do read.
TW for pet death and mourning
So I never thought that my two week haitus would be needed for mourning rather than writing. Usually, I wouldn't post stuff this personal as i know i'm exposed to a lot of ridicule and hatred and that's okay. People do things different ways, and in my case i was compleltely caught off guard and reactes the best i knew how. However, I want to spread awareness. I'm crying as i write this so its not well written and i apologize. I'm willing to answer any questions yall might have about my particular situation, but as far as cat health goes please contact a proffessional.
Sunday, around 3 am, my kitten - Juni - passed in my arms due to kidney failure. He was seven months old. I was at the door, putting my shoes on, trying to rush him to the ER. At the time, I had no idea he had CKD - cronic kidney disease. He hid it so well that even two different veteranairians didn't catch it (well one didn't and the other disregarded a sign of it. I won't be using them again). So, I want to give you guys a list of signs that formed gradually over time in hopes that you'll never have to go through the same trauma I did that night, and should one of your fur babies suffer the same fate you'll be prepared.
Camping/sitting by the water bowl for a really long time. I never witnessed him drinking excessively, but he did like to chill by the water bowl if I wasn't sitting down. (If I sat down he immediately would crawl into my lap.)
Peeing on a soft rug near the litterbox, even when the litterbox was clean. I mistook this behaviour for marking/spraying, but cats with CKD often like to pee on softer things.
Dehydrating easily. We took him to the ER Vet because he wouldnt eat or drink and kept throwing up. We had him outside with us in 80*F weather for maybe 4 hours, with free access to water. He never showed signs of overheating, just started to throw up as soon as we got inside. At the ER, they kept him overnight, saying he was very dehydrated. Which leads me to my next point.
Elevated levels in Kidney labs. ER vet told us it wasn't cause for concern since they were only 'slightly' elevated. ANY issues with the kidneys on a cat's lab work should be checked ASAP by your usual vet. CKD is very very common, especially in male cats.
Vocalizing while peeing. It wasn't a painful meow, just his regular meow. If you're a cat owner you can usually tell the difference. Once again, i mistook this for a marking/spraying behavoir.
These were signs I didn't notice, since they were all gradual, and I was told by a 'professional' not to worry about the one. There are more signs than just these, but the ones listed are what Juni displayed. If your cat does any of these, please get them screened.
Below are signs that it's likely too late, and you have to decide wether or not to drive and risk your baby passing in an unfamiliar place, or keep them home and comfy and ride through it with them. In my case, the closest vet in any direction is an hour away by car if i speed. I thought I had time. He had already decided he didn't want to pass anywhere but home. In any case, always contact a professional before making that decision.
Lethargy. Juni was always a chill little guy, ofc he got the zoomies just like our other cats, but usually just liked to chill in your lap. Saturday afternoon he was just sleeping for the most part, so my concern began there.
Hiding. Juni was attached to me at the hip. It didn't matter where i went. When i cooked, he sat on my feet. If i was in a room, he was there. When I would draw or game, he was in my lap. If i wasn't around, he would sit with someone else. So, a very socail little guy. However, by Saturday evening he wouldn't come when i called him, and he stayed hidden underneath my laundry pile.
Extremely excessive peeing. I didnt notice this because he had done it under my bed and I'd never caught him, he most likely did it during the day (i sleep during the day and am up at night due to my fiancè's work schedule.)( I didn't notice the smell because my dog has had an issue adjusting to our move and has been using the bathroom on our carpet as well :( (thank the gods i invested in a good shampooer) so I always thought the smell was my dog's.) I only noticed today, since i finally had the courage to walk into my room.
Muscle stiffness. So, when I really started to worry I gave Juni electrolyte for cats. I kept him in my bathroom with me to monitor his behavior and noticed his front and back legs would go stiff. This is when i began to panic.
Wobbling/Not being able to walk straight. As i stood up to grab my keys and wallet Juni tried to stand but kept falling over.
Loud vocalizing that slowly loses volume. I picked him up and was rushing to grab my sis-in-law (who was sleeping) becuase i was crying and panicking too much to drive (I have anxiety). And as soon as i had picked him up he started meowing loudly, then it just kept getting weaker. This was only in the matter of 10 minutes, though it felt like hours.
Quite literally after that he vomited once, peed, and passed in my arms. I tried to do cpr, but sepsis due to his kidneys failing him had already taken him. Had i known, i could have been prepared, and let him go quietly and calmly. But, because he never showed any obvious signs, and the ER vet failed to warn me, he went the way he did. Words can't describe how much it hurts. Please, please, please get your cats screened for CKD. I'm not negligent of my pets by any means. In fact, I still have my cat who i got when i was 7. She'll be 16 in feburary, and she has a heart murmur but is still thriving (she gets yearly checkups (different vet from the two that saw Juni) and will be going in for a kidney screening Monday because now I'm scared for all of my cats, even though they haven't exhibited the same behaviours as Juni did). I had no idea just how quickly and quietly CKD could kill, and how hard it would be to spot. Please, don't wait until it's too late. If you see any of those behavoirs, demand a screening. Advocate for your fur babies, because they can't do it themselves.
This is the end of informative writing. Below is just a ramble and memorial post.
At the very least, i'm glad i found Juni and kept him. I'm glad i could provide him with a home where he was happy, and loved. He really put into perspective for me how much change can happen when you're loved. He went from a spicy kitten tearing my hands to shreds when i pulled him from a bush in the Texas countryside, to a sweet baby who became my world in just a matter of months. There's so much more I could say, but typing while crying is hard as is. I miss my boy. Below are some photos of him.
Juni when I first found him
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Juni after living with me for two months (after i got him back from the ER)
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Disrupting my drawing time
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Being a menace to his sister, Chungus
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Tolerating my shenanigans
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Chilling with his sisters, Shitten and Chungus after our second move
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I will miss him forever, and my life feels like its on pause until i get his ashes back. Words cannot describe how much it pains me just to write this post. I feel like i failed as a cat mom, even though i know there wasn't much i could do. I just wish i could have caught it sooner, given him a little while longer in this life. I hope that I find him again, in this life or the next.
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Goodnight, my sweet Juni
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starlahuskyz · 1 year ago
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Chances - Chapter 10
Summary: Jordan visits the Emerson's house unbeknownst to their past history with the vampires. Hijinx ensue, Jordan gets hurt and Marko is a freak.
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Another chapter for yall
Chapter 9 <<< >>> Chapter 11
TW// Minor holy water injury, somnophilia?
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“Why the hell are you here David?” Michael shoves past Jordan approaching David as he pulls out a cigarette.
“I’m not staying long Michael, besides it wasn’t my idea to show up here. Ask Jordan, she dragged us here.” He pointed his cigarette at her as she stood by the door waiting patiently. 
“How did you meet Jordan Mikey?” Paul piped up.
Michael approaches her and grabs her shirt looking her dead in the eyes. “You mean to tell me my brother and his friends were being serious when they said you were hanging out with these guys? And now you show up to my house with them at your tail?” Jordan looked impassive and Michael turned to the group behind them “My brother tells me about her antics at the comic shop…and I may have had to fix her bike once.”
“That’s exactly why I’m here now, so you can help fix my friend’s bike.” She nodded towards Marko’s bike which was in shambles at the moment. Dwayne steps forward. “If you have the tools then I can fix the bike…in case you don’t wanna do it right now.”
“And why should I help you? Last I remember we said we would keep to ourselves from now on. I would gladly help Jordan, not you guys though.” Michael lets go of Jordan.
“Cmon Michael, look I don’t know what drama has happened between you guys but I just need this one favor from you. Just provide the tools and grease monkey over there can fix the bike. I’ll do anything man.” Michael is apprehensive and wasn’t willing to budge. 
“Dwayne!” To everyone’s surprise Laddie came running out of the house and flung himself at Dwayne. Jordan’s brain short circuited.
“I didn’t know he was your brother.” She looked at Michael who side-eyed her.
“He’s not.” At that moment another voice called from the house.
“Laddie, Dwayne is busy. Come back inside.” It came from the girl from last night.
“Relax Star, I missed my boy.” Dwayne dropped the bike parts he had and picked up his ‘son’ who just smiled innocently.
“You were with him last night.” Star crossed her arms looking at him before turning her attention to Jordan and Michael.
“Star?” Jordan tilted her head confused as she realized she never quite caught her name the night before. “Sorry, we never got to introduce ourselves properly.” She reached her hand out “I’m Jorda-”
“I know, Marko is always talking about you. I’m Star.” She returned the gesture and Jordan turned around to look at Marko who just hid his face in the handlebars of Dwayne’s bike as Paul kept nudging him laughing. “Michael, you should let them fix the bike. Jordan was the one who saved Laddie last night.” She clinged onto his arm as Michael softened a little.
“Really?” He thinks for a minute. “Alright, but I swear you guys better not try anything stupid. And you guys are not invited into the house.” He left to go get the tools from the shed. 
“What’s up with him?” Jordan asked Star.
“Oh come on!” Yet another voice rang out from down the trail. Sam was on his bike looking at the group, mainly Jordan as if she was committing a heinous crime. “I told you that these guys are bad news and you brought them to our house which I’ve said, they trashed and nearly killed us.” He got off his bike and confronted Jordan.
“Technically you guys tried killing Marko first.” Paul called out to Sam.
“Wait, that was all true?” Jordan looked at the boys who all nodded slowly at her. “I thought you were talking out of your ass, my bad man. But wait, you tried to kill Marko? What did he do to you?” Sam cuts her off.
“Him and his brothers turned my brother, Star and Laddie into half vampires!” He points at everyone incredulously.
“No wonder they’re all awake at this time…” Jordan only then remembers it’s around 1 am. Sam then stops after she says that and he stares at Jordan as if he’s putting something together in his head, he looks scared. “Hey Sam, what’s the matter? Cat got your tongue?” She reaches out for his shoulders…bad decision.
Without any prompt or words spoken, Sam reaches into his pocket and pulls out a holy water filled gun and shoots Jordan straight in the face with it. It felt like acid being shot at her face and her face started burning up as she jumped back letting out monstrous screams of pain. All hell broke loose…
“YOU’RE ONE OF THEM?” Sam also jumped back in fear at realizing that she was a vampire this whole time. Marko wasted no time in trying to attack Sam right then and there. Before he could reach him though, Paul manages to grab a hold of him and keep him from going apeshit.
“YOU LITTLE SHIT! I’LL KILL YOU! FIRST ME THEN HER? Marko thrashes in Paul’s hold trying to release himself.
“Dude! Let it go! It ain’t worth it!” Marko turns to look at him. “Don’t make this worse man. Go check on her.” Marko thinks before heading in Jordan’s direction. “You owe me dude.” He looked at Sam and went to check on Jordan as well.
“I was just vamp checking her, I swear I didn’t know. I’m so sorry” Sam wanted to approach her but Dwayne held him back. He was genuinely upset, he never really liked the idea of hurting anyone and Dwayne could feel his emotions taking over.
“Don’t worry, you can apologize later. Just help by getting a wet cloth and a bucket for her.” Sam didn’t need to be told twice.
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After an hour everything settled down. Star was tending to Jordan in Michael’s room while Marko, Paul, and David waited inside much to Michael's dismay. Marko was furious and still trying to cool down while Paul tried to make him feel better. David didn’t speak or really show any kind of emotion during the whole ordeal.
“I can’t fucking believe him. He had the nerve-” Paul cut Marko off before he could go off again.
“Dude he’s a kid. Besides I still can’t really blame him given what happened in ‘87. Besides, he seems to feel bad. Unlike those frog brothers who would’ve killed first and asked questions later. He’s at least sympathetic.” Paul shrugged and he was upset too, but he kind of understood where he was coming from. He was the most upset by the kid’s actions last year. They damn near almost killed all of them if it wasn’t for their sire intervening the whole thing. They left everything at a truce to stop anything from escalating further. Now wasn’t the time to continue this vampire war or whatever this was.
Soon Dwayne and Michael walk into the house having finally fixed the bike or at least got it into a drivable state. “How is she doing?” Dwayne asks.
“We don’t know. Star said it wasn’t too bad and that it should heal tomorrow.” Paul explained. Not too long after, Star finally comes from Michael’s room with a rag in hand.
“She’ll be okay, it just seems like it shook her up more than anything. She’s probably never been sprayed with holy water before.” Marko gets up and heads upstairs but before he could, Star grabs his sleeve. “She’s sleeping, please be quiet.”  Marko nods and goes up.
He opens the door quietly and sees Jordan laying on the bed. She looks dead to the whole world, even as Marko walks up to her sleeping form she doesn’t stir. Marko takes a seat on the edge of the bed, still nothing. For a while, he just stares at her. He looks at every little detail about her, he admires her face, how she isn’t overly pretty, but just enough to tug at his heart and make him yearn for more. Her body being perfect for him, not a lot but just enough. Her dark raven colored hair being styled in a way he’s never seen a girl do before. She felt mysterious to him. He was always mysterious himself, at least going off of what many people have said about him.
Marko then has an urge. Touch. He has to touch her. He slowly removes one of his gloves, he rarely ever removes them. But he wants to touch her without any barriers. He reaches for her hand and gingerly touches it, soon gaining more confidence he starts to grab and massage her hand. He traces over each finger and over each knuckle which were all exposed due to her wearing motorcycle gloves. He traces over the small window exposing the back of her hand before trailing up her arm. He lifts up her sleeve exposing her tattoo of what looked to be some kind of hellhound with the word ‘fiend’ underneath it. His curiosity kept rising with her, what she had the tattoo for was unbeknownst to him, and he wanted to know badly. He continued trailing over her arm onto her shoulder then reaching for her neck. One of his claws showed itself and he dragged it up her neck until it reached right under her chin. He ends up leaving a nick on her skin which draws a single drop of blood. Marko watches as it slowly oozes down her neck, he then bends over the bed and licks up the blood including the small mark he left. She tasted glorious, here he thought he couldn’t love her anymore than he already did, and yet he’s loving her even more. As much as he wanted to taste her more, he already knew that what he was doing was creepy enough. He pushed himself back up from her neck and reached his exposed hand over to her face. Touching her with the lightest of touch as if she was the most fragile piece of pottery ever made. He then hears a sneeze from across the room, and after looking up, he wants to die right then and there. Laddie was sitting by the window sill watching him the whole goddamn time.
“How long have you been watching me for?” Marko looks at him warily.
“Too long…you’re weirder than Paul.” He nods towards the door and Marko looks behind him at the door and sees Paul watching him through the opening of the door. Marko then panics and falls off the bed causing the room to shake which makes both Paul and Laddie laugh like hyenas. The laughter was enough to cause Jordan to stir in her sleep. Soon everyone goes quiet in order to keep her from waking up, which works. 
“You guys are too damn loud.” Marko struggles to put his glove back on as he gets off the floor.
“Don’t worry bud, I get you’re embarrassed. But your secret is safe with me.” Paul winks at Marko as he helps put his glove back on. “Right bud?” He peeks around Marko and looks at Laddie who does a zip motion over his mouth. Marko sighs and leaves the room.
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When Jordan wakes up, it’s 5:30 pm. The sun hasn’t quite gone down completely yet weirdly enough though, she finds herself curled up on her bed in her room along with Bixby chilling on one of her shelves watching her. She doesn’t quite know how he got home, then she saw a note attached to the wall next to her bed. She pulls it off the wall and reads it…or well she tries to until she realizes it’s written in cursive. She was never good with reading cursive especially when she’s tired, the only thing she could recognize was the name signed at the bottom of the note
—Yours truly, Marko 
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Taglist (If you wanna be tagged, just ask ^ ^)
@blog4horror @ria-coolgirl @oceansrose2002 @hypocriticaltypwriter @deliciousfestsalad
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uwuowotf2waslife · 1 year ago
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What if Medic taught the team sex ed because he found out that someone has an STI and the mercs later either follow his advice or completely ignore it + Medic educating reader on safe sex on practice
The reason I came up with this is that I'm really stupid so I got thrush. I'm so fucking embarrassed, I'm a grown ass woman but I somehow did my hygiene incorrectly and I'm itchy down there and it burns to pee. I'm making an appointment with a gynecologist as I write this so I should be fine
Love your writing, acceptance of horny and your chill. Best wishes to you and sorry for shitty English
Dw frend your english is ✨✨✨✨
Also get well soon <3 it happens to the best of us
Tw: Sex mention/STD mention
In this case: Spy (fuckboy) got trush and Medic had a mild stroke when finding out only 3/9 Mercs understand the concept of STDs
Medic: lecturer in the conference room used in ED. Has a small presentation of whats STIs are and how to avoid them.
“Zo az you zhee, thiz are the common STDs you may encounter during ehm…”
“During third base!” Pips Scout.
Visible confusion by all non english speaking members except Spy
“The boy means sex… speak like an adult sout.” Half muffled by a ciggarete.
“Doubt you can get a hard on, frenchman, just 10 secs ago sawbone said you loose your errectIon once you hit 60” scout goes for a low blow
“Your mother never complains, does she.” Spy snakes back for a lower blow.
“SAY IT AGAIN FUCKFACE AND YOULL HAVE A MUFFCABBAGE FOR A HEAD” scout tries to grab his pistol, forgets that he had to surrender it at the lockers for safety.
“SHUT UP BABYMEN! DOCTOR SAYS ITS IMPORTANT “ a russian roar cuts them both raw and leaves them hanging.
A shill sound cuts them all, now Medic using Archimedes claws to get them all to pay attention
“Danke mein Freund “. “Now I know thiz will be embarrassing but you are all very welcome to use the jar in the medbay, well you wish to… touczh third base” A true genious never lets new opportunities for a learning moment to fall.
“So the condom jar?” “Didnt yall ever used that till Spy got Thursh??!” Scout looks dumbfounded
“You dont really use protection when ya are a gentleman, mongrel!” Sniper visibly annoyed and flustered because in his non medical experience a quickie in a van isnt really prime time for proper sex ed usage.
“Snipes Sheep dont count!” Scout goes for the low hanging fruit.
Sniper roses up and looks anywhere for a weapon but decides his chair is prime
Untill he is stopped by heavy and is basically hogtied by a even taller and burlier man
“Next will be in Locker” simple threat but working.
“Dankeshone Fruende… but yes I expect you all to use them. We cant have a czeafire because you all have different sztrains of StDS reaking havoc.”…
“ Never seen you using one tho Sawbones” Again scout being a dumbass.
Soldier now fed up , stands up and salutes
“MEDIC AS AN AMERICAN I HAVE BEEN TAUGHT IN MY AMERICAN EDUCATION WHAT SEXUALY TRANSIMETED DISEASES ARE, BUT THIS HERE BASTARDS HAVE MADE THIS LESSON UNACCEPTABLE. PERMISSION TO STRANGLE SCOUT?”
“NO TALK BABYMAN!”
“What if ye just want yer dick sucked by a bird? Do ye also need a condom?” Demo awoken has to ask the most revelant question in the last hour and a half.
“YOU DO VAT TO BIRDS?” Medic officially snapped.
“Ya know, chicks” scout yells amidst being stangled
“Vat?”
“HE MEANS WOMEN YOU IDIOT” hogtied sniper yells
“JA YOU DUMBKOFF!”
Earie silence from Medic finnaly snapping.
“Do we also have to use it with dudes? Like is it any different?”scout is about to pass out.
Medic defeated
Spy horrified his son is bi ( boomer fainting)
“I mean same same but different so prolly yeah” answers him an amused Engie.
“Mhmmm mmh” Pyro says and leaves the building.
True mercenary chaos ensues with Spy accusing Scout from hiding shit from him while all the others have fights about who did what and why they didnt use a wrapper.
Case in point
They are all idiots.
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wias-blog · 2 years ago
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Some thoughts on houseki no kuni: mainly focused on Welegato/Cairngorm- Enma's toxic relationship and theories on what will happen to Phos
TW!!!: abusive relationship and phos wishing to die
So to start off, I've been checking in on HNKs page here and some of yall really like to argue and threaten others over fiction characters, like please stop and act civil these characters AREN'T REAL. it is not okay to threaten or insult others based on their opinion on fiction.
Okay, now to the story. As someone who has been in an abusive relationship, I see the same resemblance in Welegato's relationship with Enma. Enma acted like a "savior" to Welegato. and to all who say, "He wasn't manipulating Cairn" fail to notice the panels in which he states that he got Cairn away from phos on purpose to make phos a divine being to pray.
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It is vague, but it is enough to realize Enma tricked Welegato and all the other gems to stay away from Phos. If you look at other parts of the story, you can see how Enma pushes himself onto Cairn, using their innocence and naivety to his advantage. Cairn/Welegato became a glorified trophy wife. In all honesty, I pity them more than I hate them because they never realized what was going on. They complied to whatever Enma said and wanted because they thought he truly loved them. For example, the scene in which he says Ghost is controlling him through Cairn's eyes. This made Cairn have a full-blown panic attack and shatter. What did Enma do to help them calm down? Nothing, he stood there, putting his plan into action. He did this because when He took out the quartz from Cairns eye, he knew Cairn would see him as someone who saved him from his long gone outer shell. Now to Ghost Quartz, in my opinion, was never abusive towards Cairn. they did the things they saw that were needed to stay in control of their body. Ghost may not have cared about Cairn inside them because they saw them as someone who got in the way of their life. Cairn was very violent, numerous times, we've seen them punch and break Phos out of anger. Even on the moon, they become cruel towards Phos and insult them numerous times. Enma just made Cairn/Welegato more spoiled and violent. That's the main issue. Bad relationships are hard to recognize until you see for yourself what you've become. In this case, Welegato never got to see how bad this was and stayed that way until they turned into nothingness. I'm very sad at this fact because Welegato had so much potential as a character. They have a good back story about identity and becoming something great, but it was washed down to a babied brat who turned their back on someone who needed them most. I think Welegatos' story is a story where the happy ending was never actually happy. They never got to realize who they could actually become, instead becoming controlled by another person.
With all that said and done let's move on to the next topic: Phos
Phos has said in the latest chapter (102, ps. spoilers ahead!!!) that they wish to eradicate their own existence. This can go either of two most likely ways. Phos fails to do this and learns to live with the human inside their inclusions or successes and goes into nothingness. There is a third was this can go, where all the lunarians are brought back or he finds out nothingness is an afterlife where all the others are. (knowing Ichikawa, this will NEVER happen :/). My next question is, how will this happen? Will Adamants brother be able to help Phos or will it not work? Until the next chapter we can only theorize.
that's all. Feel free to comment on what your theories are! - Autie
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