#just finished tftdate

[waffle-bubbles]

Why does Adam Silvera have to write the most devastating books

[can-tthink]

VALENTINORION

book ramble below (little messy to call it a review lmao)

hi i’m alive!!! long story short my mood has been rly shit, so i took a hiatus off art for a while and also went into a reading slump, but i finally managed to finish tftdate today!

i love but also hate the ending oml, this book is so beautiful but the way he (no spoilers) dies is so brutal, i had to step outside and touch some grass to process that 😭 AND THE VIDEO IN THE USB DRIVE GAVE ME SO MANY MIXED EMOTIONS. BRO IM SHITTING TEARS. THEY LOVED EACHOTHER SM. i’m so glad he thought ahead to make the video though, it’s so bittersweet. they didn’t even get to look through their photos together though

it’s so thought provoking just like the first book and it made me think so hard about how things could’ve been different, like if valentino never moved to new york or if his landlord was a different

but all we, the reader, know for sure is that valentino would’ve stayed miserable if he never met orion. and orion finally got a boyfriend. they both lived their dreams in one day, i think that’s the closest to a happy ending we can get.

to be honest i find adam silveras writing style a little choppy and fast paced, but it didn’t stop me from learning a lot about valentino and orion, and their interactions are so cute

i even had some hope at the end that things would go right but nope ☹️

i felt a whole lot of different emotions after the ending, but one things for sure, i cried a lot!!! 😍😍😍 i don’t know what’s with adam silvera and making gay couples sad bro, this book is so homophobic of him smh. the only way i can describe the ending is awfully bittersweet. and the way the side stories tie together is so genius but so cruel at the same time, so kudos to adam silvera for that

anyway good news is that it sparked an art idea for me, so i decided to draw these sad gays to cope

to me they’re just paid actors and the whole book is fake and they’re happily married alr nobody can convince me otherwise

also my art is inspired by some old art VIVINOS made, she’s a really cool animator

[anonymouscuzwhynot001]

so

uhm

i just finished tftdate

emotions are running quite low

i think i burnt myself out of tbdate

can't feel anything

THAT'S A FUCKING LIE AND I KNOW IT ADAM SILVERA DID IT AGAIN GIVE US A SAD HAPPY PAIR OF CUTE LITTLE INNOCENT KIDS HAVING FUN UNTIL DEATH-CAST CALLS TO FUCK UP THEIR LIVES AGAIN

LIKE VALENTINORION WAS SO AWESOME WHILE IT LASTED AND I'M READY TO MURDER SOMEONE AFTER THAT LAST STUNT VALENTINO PULLED LIKE BITCH YOU KNEW YOU WERE GONNA DIE YOU DIDN'T EVEN GIVE YOUR BOYFRIEND YOUR SIXTH-FLOOR KISS AND JUMPED HEADFIRST INTO THE FIGHT AND LIKE I GET IT YOU'RE RIPPED BUT IF YOU DON'T PUT THOSE GUNS TO USE YOU'LL GET RIPPED (EXACTLY LIKE YOU DID)

AND SADJLHGSJSD LITTLE MATEO AND RUFUS LIKE OMG RUFUS BACKSTORY NEW BIKE AND HIS MOM WAS LITERALLY IN ON THEIR OPERATION AND MATEO ALMOST KNEW RUFUS BEFORE HE ENDED UP BEING HIS BOYFRIEND AND—

ONE SEC LEMME SOB—

K I'M BACK

LIKE IMAGINE THEY'D KNOWN EACH OTHER FOR MUCH LONGER AND STARTED DATING BEFORE THEY KNEW THEY WERE GONNA DIE BUT AT LEAST THEY'D GO OUT TOGETHER AND IT'D MAKE THEIR DAY SO MUCH HARDER

AND LIKE VALENTINO AND ORION DIDN'T GET TO DO THEIR LOVE LOCK THING BUT THEY CARVED THEIR NAME (SINGULAR) ON A WOODEN BENCH WHICH CAN BE WORN AWAY OR BROKEN OR UTTERLY DESTROYED (JUST LIKE THEM)—

AHEM ANYWAYS AND THEY DIDN'T EVEN GET TO TAKE THEIR PLANNED TRIP DOWN MEMORY LANE CUZ STUPID VALENTINO JUST HAD TO GET INTO THAT FIGHT WHILE POOR LITTLE PAZ PULLS THE TRIGGER ON HIS DAD AND KILLED HIM AND I REALLY THOUGHT THE LAST DECKER WOULD BE ORION NGL BC I WOULDN'T PUT IT PAST ADAM SILVERA TO TORTURE US LIKE THAT

BUT NOW ORION HAS A PERMANENT REMINDER OF THE REASON HE'S ALIVE AND HAD FUN AND FELL IN LOVE AND LIVED AND DID IT WITH AND IT'S ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY DESTROYING ME EATING ME UP FROM THE INSIDE UNTIL I'M A BROKEN HUMAN SHELL UNABLE TO FUNCTION EVER AGAIN

AND THE FACT THAT SCARLETT COULDN'T SEE HER BROTHER ALIVE EVER AGAIN IN PERSON BC OF STUPID DEATH-CAST LITERALLY GO FUCK YOURSELF AND SCARLETT NOW HAS TO LIVE LIFE ONLY HALF ALIVE

AND I LITERALLY STARTED CRYING HALFWAY THROUGH THE BOOK EVEN THOUGH NOTHING TOO BAD HAPPENED YET JUST LIKE I STARTED CRYING HALFWAY THROUGH TBDATE WHEN MATEO INVITED LIDIA TO JOIN HIM AND RUFUS AT THE TRAVEL ARENA AND LIDIA WAS SO CLOSE TO BREAKING DOWN

AND LIKE IMAGINE VALENTINO HAD NEVER BUMPED INTO ORION IMAGINE THEY'D NEVER MET IMAGINE ORION NEVER GOT HIS GOLDEN HEART IMAGINE VALENTINO GAVE UP BEFORE IT EVEN STARTED IMAGINE THEY BOTH DIED WITHOUT KNOWING THE OTHER EXISTED NEW YORK'S A BIG CITY THE POSSIBILITIES ARE ENDLESS

I THINK I CRIED MORE THAN TBDATE BUT WHO THE FUCK KNOWS IT'S 1:45 AM AND I'M DEPRESSED AND SO FUCKING DESTROYED AFTER THAT LIKE VALENTINO YOU CAN'T BE DOING THAT ON YOUR END DAY HUN THAT FUCKING TERRIFIED ME LITERALLY RIPPED MY HEART OUT OF MY CHEST AND FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

[bookwyrminspiration]

dira you tagged a character post with the 50 shades dude are you ok??? this feels like a cry for help but also my brain is fried and i don’t know how to help this so like. rewatch black sails??? maybe????

oh my god this is hilarious. you know what? you’re right. I came to the realization today that if i don’t finish this book like tomorrow. I won’t be able to for like another week, just prolonging the agony, and maybe that’s doing something to my brain

I can say though! That I have not only been reading 50 shades. read some tftdate earlier, so I am getting breaks :)

but um. maybe keep an eye on me guys. maybe you should check on me some times and give me little tests to ensure my brain hasn’t melted. critical thinking pop quizzes

[one-hell-of-otaku-is-here]

If people who only watched Netlfix series think Heartstopper s2 was heart wrecking, then Idk what they're gonna do when s3 comes out cos oh boy, I have a suprise for you... it'll get worse (especially for Charlie... this isn't a spoiler it was alluded to already in the show... you can't expect mental disorders to magically wish away - I love how realistic this show is agzhatvauavysvsyah)

It's not like it was in any way heartbreaking... actually, it was so way sweeter that books (big applause for Kit and Joe's friendship or all friendship between actors because you just could tell they are enjoying themselves soo soo much especially during Paris trip??? Like they played so genuinely it felt so real and this is what you want your acting to be like aaaa) and I am so glad we got dinner scene so early it wrapped up coming out for Nick nicely.

Either way season 2 was everything I hoped to be and more aww. I love that Isaac is aroace. Paris squad is basically the whole fucking LGTBQ rainbow. Also Imogen maybe becoming bi??? I loved her cute Barbie pink outfit in Paris trip she slayed. Omg yess to all only show characters cos I love them. The only thing I could complain about is having more Ben there. I thought we were done with him bit Ig they needed to finally close that chapter when Charlie said what he needed to during prom to him (which btw go my boi) Please please get him away from my squad I was soo sick of him in s1 and somehow it'll got worse in second one.

Either way I don't feel emotionally broken actually I felt and still feel really refreshed (despite having cliffhanger) and it definitely did not leave me dying like I was dying over GO S2. Or after finishing book TFTDATE. So that's that