#just fell to my fuckjng knees

[pestocavatappi]

sorry to keep on about Dan & Phil and Trixie & Katya but they've both been best friends for 15 years im gonna be SICK

edit: i was mistaken and t&K have been friends for almost 10 years not 15, but STILL

[malethirsty]

Victory Starts With V & Ends In Sex - Roman Reigns

Summary: Following a much deserved victory against King Corbin & Dolph Ziggler, Roman Reigns finally capitalizes on it with you.

Warnings: M/M smut (21+), Daddy Kink, Bareback (Wrap Before You Tap!)

Inspired By: https://twitter.com/malethirst/status/1196169686259363842?s=21

You had been watching SmackDown from the wings half cheering and half covering your eyes, watching Roman’s latest bout with King Corbin. You hadn’t been a fan of these recent dog food matches because instead of getting to fuck the beautiful Samoan, you had to wash the food out from him, it was fucking up with your relationship and you were desperate, however this night however was set to be different. Some type of God clearly decided to take pity on you tonight however as you soon heard Roman’s battle cry, and looking up you saw him expertly hit a spear on Corbin for the win, the guerrilla erupting into cheers as their locker room leader finally pulled out a victory, none as loud as you were, though for more than just a victory for Roman's status, it meant tonight you wouldn't be bathing Roman, but rather bathing in the glory of the Samoan, which usually meant a good, long, intense fuck. He eventually walked through the curtain, getting his congratulations from his cohort. He soon walked up to you, last in the line & whispered in your ear “Thanks for supporting me tonight baby boy, tonight you get to handle a different type of meat” he winked at you. You moved your hand to his cock, but he quickly grabbed it in a vice like way “Nuh-uh, go back to the hotel, wait for me there, this ain’t no shower fuck, you’re gonna get treated like a prince tonight.” He winked over at you and walked over to the locker room. Spurred on by his challenge, you made your way out of the guerrilla and up to the hotel. 

You picked out a silky dressing gown and draped yourself over the couch, eagerly awaiting his arrival, it had been so long since you'd gotten to experience Roman in bed, sure he was the sweet type outside of the doors and he treated you right inside of them, but no one really knew what a freak Roman was in bed, ever since you'd decided to take the step into sex, you wouldn't have been surprised if you'd hadn't already completed the entire Kuma Satra, he was as dominant in bed as he was in the squared circle, and it wouldn't be uncommon to go multiple M e rounds into the night and early morning, nothing would stop Roman until he was entirely sated sexually, and that sort of power had led you to fuck pretty much anywhere from the hotel, to his dressing room, gym, even after the show once the crowd went home, Roman laid you down in the ring and pounded you into the slats, turning you into the biggest slut imaginable as you pushed back against him, begging for more and he happily obliged. You were so lost in your thoughts rear you didn’t hear the door open and Roman come in. He saw your feet draped over the edge of the couch and made his way over to you, once you caught eyes with him, your face lit up and beamed “Hail the conquering hero Y/N." He spoke, his voice deep as if coming from the pit of his stomach and you didn't wait to be asked twice, you leapt up onto him and locked him in a kiss. Roman's tongue slid into your mouth as his hands gripped your ass, feeling up what belonged to him as he made out with you.  “Fuck” he breathed out as he broke the kiss to breathe, you took the time to run your hands over his body, his beautiful skin, Roman returning the favour by running his hands through your hair.

"Bedroom now" He growled and you untangled your legs around Roman and lowered yourself to the ground, where Roman gripped your hands and led you to the promised land. “Strip for me babe, give daddy a show.” Roman instructed, pulling off his own shirt to push you to remove the robe for him, you moved your hands to the knot and undid it slowly, keeping your eyes on your man, you slowly removed the fabric, showing off your naked form for Roman, who moaned as his reward was exposed to him, he looked down to your dick, which had been exceptionally hard since you'd drifted off into thoughts of how and when Roman had claimed you as his. He moved towards you and slid his hand hand your torso "This right here, is all mine." He pulled his pants down with his other hand, his cock flopping out, as stiff as yours yet only getting harder “See this Y/N? This is how hard you made me, I think you need to get your pretty lips round it & suck it.” You fell to your knees and obeyed his instruction, fitting as much as you could at first. “God, I’ve missed your hot mouth on my cock.” Roman breathed out in pleasure “You look so hot with my cock in your mouth, I think it would look ever better if you rolled my balls as well”. He hinted and not pausing your ministrations you moved hand down to cup them, lightly rolling them in your hand as you slurped down and up Roman's length.

Roman pulled your hair back, stretching you out as he moved in to kiss you, kissing whilst you were both fucking was powerful, like lightning striking through you, and this was no exception. After his lips parted yours, he slammed in harder making you cry out "Fuck! Roman!" "Yeah you like that, look out the window" you did just that, not noticing anything off until "You forgot to close the curtains babe." Your eyes widened, but Roman, sensing your shock, slid a hand into your hair in a soothing fashion "Don't worry baby, the neighbours should see this, you spread out, getting raw dogged by The Big Dog, looking like an obedient slut while Daddy fucks you good. Bet they'd get off to it, they'd touch themselves, wanting to be in your place, he'll even wanting you to prop yourself up on their bed do they can be as satisfied as me. Fuck them though, the only one who deserves to feel this tight ass grip their dick and cum inside you is ME." He punctuated the last word with a rougher thrust than before, his balls colliding with your ass, the slap echoing around the room. As much of a sex God as Roman was, he still had his limits and after what felt like a quarter of an hour, you noticed Roman’s stroke had started to get sloppier. Roman could sense it as well from how he gripped your neck, nails digging in "Fuck I’m gonna cum, you want Daddy’s cum all up in your hole Y/N?” You used what was left of your voice to groan out a yes. Roman & you went faster and faster, grunting, groaning and moaning until your moans filled the air from the both of you as you both came, falling onto the bed in a heap as you came down from the intense fuck. you lay there, rattled by your respective orgasms before Roman spoke “Don’t wait until I win another match babe, I can’t wait to get up in there again.” You laughed at his words “Well you don’t have to worry anymore, I think you said you wanted to make a sex tape with me" "Yeah so I can have something to jerk off to on the road." Roman said a matter factly as if ssying what the weather was "Well you’ve got me and this weekend to flim, all so we don't have to shoot all in one take, in fact, you'll be shooting more than once.” “Goddamn, I love you Y/N” Roman let out softly as you moved in and kissed him again, warming up for the second of many rounds to come.

Roman threw his head back moaning so loud that the neighbors would probably hear “Oh yeah! Such a fucking slut, you’re making me feel so damn good.” He glanced down at you, cock in mouth, balls in hand “I want to make a sex tape with you, what I'm seeing now, you being all submissive for me, God it's fucking sight!" “Fetch the camera later, it’s been so long since I got your dick, fuck me hard like I deserve.” Roman chuckled “Babe, I’d do anything for you.” He pulled you off his cock and up to his face, where he again kissed you, the taste of Roman's musk now trapped in his mouth as he again made out with you, before pulling away and turning you around roughly and shoving you onto the bed stomach first, hiking up your hips so your ass was aligned to his cock, he placed two fingers into his mouth spitting on them before he began to move down but you stopped him “You don’t need to prepare me, ever week since this Corbin mess began, I’ve been stretching myself open, hoping you would win a match & you’d fuck me roughly after.” Roman looked stunned at first, but it soon melted to a look of arousal “Had I had known that you were on the line, I would have fought harder. But no matter, I’ve got you now & I plan to make you feel real good tonight and every other fuckjng night” He slid in, the both of you moaning in pleasure. He started to move swiftly, picking up the pace “Fuck, I forgot how nice & tight you were” you arched your back, Roman gripping onto your hair as he thrusted inside on you. Yeah baby, you've been waiting for so damn long to feel my dick inside you, take it, feel how hard it is inside you, how is pulses, how it'll nut inside you, appreciate this dick.” He grunted out, a grin forming on his face as he uttered the most dirtiest things as he fucked you like only The Big Dog could “Yes sir, I love how it feels inside me, love how you fuck me, Oh God Roman!” his thrusts became deeper and harder as you complimented his stroke game, Roman flipped his hair back, a cockier look forming on his face "So fucking good for me, God I’m so lucky to have you”

[downfallofi]

So, today at my job, I must have dropped my wallet digging out my badge because we have to fucking go to the back side of the entire store to enter it or we get in trouble and we need a key card badge to enter the back way. Didnt notice my wallet was missing for 3 hours until I got a break. Then I tried to buy a soda, and I started patting my very empty pocket.

I said fuck the entire break and the job in this moment and went out to the parking lot, getting on my hands and knees searching under cars in the lot while I hyperventilated and panicked because my wallet was missing (possibly an overreaction because this is the 3rd time in my life I've lost my wallet)

It had my debit card, ID, food stamp card, and my bus card on it, along with a bunch of appointment cards and stuff. Basically, this time I had so much stuff I dreaded losing, but I was concerned the most about my debit card.

So I push down the panic attack and call my bank and cancel the card.

Not an hour later a cart pusher finds my wallet on the fuckjng back of the building, WHERE IT FELL, as presumably I dug into my pocket to retrieve the badge.

After my card was cancelled, thanks Obama.

I am just the best adult in the world.