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frvnchies · 5 years ago

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lovable alpha bitch / the speechless / so beautiful, it’s a curse

NAME.

FULL NAME: francesca eloise waverly. PREFERRED NAME/NICKNAMES: frenchie. GENERALLY REFERRED TO AS: francesca by her parents (which she does not like!), frenchie by essentially everyone else.

APPEARANCE.

FACECLAIM: halston sage. SEX: cisfemale. HEIGHT: short — she’s about 5′3″. WEIGHT: about 115 lbs normally, more like 110 during pageant season. BUILD: slim with some tone from working out. HAIR: soft natural dirty blonde with some subtle highlights from the salon, often styled in loose waves. HANDS: small, delicate, perfectly manicured hands. she has a regimen for taking care of herself, hands included (she’s got a mani-pedi appointment every tuesday afternoon). SCARS: faded scar on her knee from a fall as a child. CLOTHES: she dresses like a sorority girl, tbh. a lot of lilly pulitzer, some madewell and free people, kate spade bags, pearls, lululemon leggings & vineyard vines or simply southern shirts when she’s feeling lazy. OTHER NOTABLE FEATURES: wide smile.

SPEECH.

VOICECLAIM: as far as her normal speaking voice, halston works. as for singing, i’m gonna go big and say she’s got a touch of sara bareilles. ACCENT: soft carolinian accent, kind of like this. VERBAL TICS: tendency to use pet names (sugar, honey, darlin’, etc). LANGUAGE: she’s fluent in english & ASL, currently studying spanish. ARTICULATION: she’s very articulate and sure of herself when explaining things. as with most things in her life, this is a result of excessive pageant practice. EDUCATION: the thing about the way frenchie talks is that it’s long & tiresome, but more from the fact that she drawls her words like a good southern girl and less from the fact that she uses big words. she’s not dumb, but it’s not her style. LAUGHTER: she doesn’t laugh loudly because her mother says it’s not ladylike. she tends to giggle instead. BREATHING: she makes a lot of noise during club meetings, partly because it’s easier to convey her meaning through sighs and humphs than writing something out.

MANNERISMS.

FACE: a lot of times, she doesn’t mind people knowing what she thinks, so it’ll be written all over her face (i.e. when she sees the murder club being weird, it’s not hard to tell that she thinks it’s weird). that being said, she can put on a pretty good poker face when she wants to. HANDS: being too expressive / talking with her hands / making herself too big or loud in general has been drilled into her as unladylike, so her hands usually stay folded in her lap. LEGS/FEET: absolutely not. see above. EMOTIONAL OUTBURSTS: if anything, frenchie tends to maintain the hell out of a poker face when she’s upset and then burst into tears the second she’s alone. she doesn’t like losing face in front of others; it feels too vulnerable. HABITS: most fidgety sort of habits have been discouraged by her mother. the one thing she can’t get frenchie to stop doing is twirling her hair. POSTURE: her posture is absolutely perfect. that’s a pageant queen for you! PERSONAL SPACE: depends on who we’re talking about. with friends, she’s much more likely to be comfortable with them – ex. brushing shoulders, casual touches, etc. with strangers or people she doesn’t know, she’ll back off a little, and is more averse to them getting up in her space. she’s pretty tolerant of anything, though. OTHER: she can usually be found chewing a stick of gum.

HEALTH.

DIET: frenchie’s on a pretty strict diet as far as keeping in shape for pageant stuff. this usually means a lot of salads, lean meat, veggies, that sort of thing — if she even bothers to eat at all, which is less likely to occur during pageant season. she has an undeniable sweet tooth, though, so she’ll always cave for a shake at marie’s. SLEEP: these days, she doesn’t sleep as much. she usually tries to get a solid eight hours, but her sleep is so restless now that she’s lucky if she can grab a few hours at best. EXERCISE: it probably borders on a little bit too much of the treadmill / stairclimber. right now she’s more busy with the murder club, which takes away from her usual regimen. ACTIVITY: she’ll damn near kill herself practicing pageant stuff if she thinks it’ll make her mom happy. CLEANLINESS: frenchie takes a lot of pride in her appearance, so she’s always been the type to shower regularly and keep herself clean & tidy. she has a whole regimen of soaps, scrubs, lotions, etc. that she follows religiously. ODOR: her signature perfume is armani’s sí. if she’s not wearing that, she’ll still smell pleasant and vaguely girly, mostly like her shampoo. MEDICINAL DRUGS: she got a prescription for xanax last year, but she never filled it. NARCOTICS: she’s not averse to smoking some weed at a party, but nothing more than that (she tends to worry about her singing voice). PARASITES: does jamie count as a parasite?

PERSONAL.

INTROVERT/EXTROVERT?: definitely an extrovert — she always likes being around people, and usually feels better / more energized when she’s out and about. OPTIMIST/PESSIMIST: optimist. she has an unwavering belief that things will work out. this is probably a result of the fact that she’s white, pretty, and well off, so things do tend to work out for her. SEXUALITY: frenchie’s still kind of figuring this out, but she’s bisexual. as far as people she’s dated in the past, they’ve usually been the type of person people expect her to be with — hot, popular, etc. as for what she actually wants for herself, she really just needs someone who’ll make her smile. ROMANTIC: biromantic. again, has yet to realize that anyone other than cis dudes are really an option for her, but she’s got a big heart underneath all that hairspray, and she’s secretly a hopeless romantic. MEMORY: she has a better memory than a lot of people give her credit for. she’s especially good with names/faces/dates/times, that sort of thing. PLANNING: she has a planner. does she use it? no. she just wanted the lilly pulitzer print to tote around. this bitch just wanders into whatever she wants to do next — her whims are wild and often. INTUITION: she generally trusts herself and her gut. whether or not this is a good thing is still up for debate. GOALS: as of right now, her only clear goal is to win the miss teen normal 2019 pageant. other than that, she has a vague idea of the kind of life she wants to have, but pageantry has really shaped a lot of who she is. INSECURITIES: she’s insecure about the fact that she kind of feels like a one trick pony. if she can’t do pageants, what can she do? ACHIEVEMENTS: little miss normal 2012, young miss normal 2014, junior miss teen normal 2017... you get the gist. ANXIETY: pageants lol. her mother. the idea of failing her mother. anything along those lines, honestly. SELF-HELP: frenchie is very much of the ‘ignore the problem until it goes away’ mindset. this is not working for her at all right now, which distresses her greatly. BAD HABITS: she smacks her gum, which drives her mother absolutely insane. otherwise, she tends to drill out her bad habits before they can form. PHILOSOPHY: she was raised catholic, but frenchie has struggled with the whole believing part of religion for years. she still goes to services every sunday with her family, but her heart’s not in it. she wants to believe in something, but she has a hard time taking the church’s word for it. she’d probably fall best under agnostic for now.

THE PAST.

PARENTS/GUARDIANS: her relationship with her dad is amiable but distant; he’s always at work, so they never really bonded the way they should’ve. she’s tied up tight with her mom, but that relationship is absolutely riddled with anxiety and angst. she wants so desperately to have her mom’s approval that she has very few positive interactions with her. WORST DAY OF THEIR LIFE: the day she lost her voice. not only was it incredibly embarrassing to stand on stage and watch everyone whisper about her, but she’s genuinely distressed by the idea that it has yet to come back. there’s no explanation, no reason — she can’t be stuck like this the rest of her life. BEST DAY OF THEIR LIFE: when she won little miss normal, her mother took the whole family out for a huge dinner and let frenchie get whatever she wanted. it was one of the few times she can remember having everyone together without a single sharp word or argument.

RELATIONSHIPS.

FAMILY: the only family member she truly trusts to have her back is her twin brother, theo. she absolutely idolizes her mother, but frenchie knows that she would leave her kids in the dust if she thought they needed to learn a lesson. FRIENDSHIPS: truthfully, she has almost no true friends. her best friend is, without a doubt, theo. frenchie’s the kind of person who’s surrounded by people, but feels absolutely alone — none of them really know her, or even care to try. though she might try to resist, the rest of the murder club is on their way to being her friend, too. NEEDING A FRIEND: she generally deals with problems on her own (read: she does not deal with them and waits until it fizzles out), or she consults theo (read: she has him take care of it). ANNOYANCES: cold shoulder, 100%. she’s a petty bitch and it’s very easy to do now that she legitimately cannot talk. ROMANCE: frenchie is actually very unsure when it comes to any sort of romance. she wants it, but has no idea how to invite it in. ADVERSARIES: people who say ‘lol’ out loud, the entire state of florida, people who chew really loudly, dentists, people who want to be dentists. ENEMIES: people who are mean to animals, probably. FUN STUFF: getting shakes at marie’s, going shopping, taking long drives. BEST FRIEND: theo.

INTERACTIONS.

MINGLING: when she actually tries, she’s got a certain charm about her that makes it fairly easy for her to make people like her. COMFORT LEVELS: as a rule, she doesn’t really have any issues talking to anyone, from strangers on up to close friends or family, so she’s pretty hard to faze in that sense. GROUPS: she’s comfortable with both big and small groups. she likes having both in equal measure — big groups for a fun time, small groups for that good 1-on-1 dish. OPENNESS: since she doesn’t really have any true, close friends, she has a harder time opening up about real stuff. if she’s having issues, theo’s the one who will hear about it, and she’s never seen need to tell anyone else whatever’s closest to her heart. GENEROSITY: if the murder club was a sorority, frenchie would be everyone’s big. she’s still warming up to them a bit, but she’s very generous with milkshake orders, ghost hunting supplies — whatever. she doesn’t care. she has daddy’s amex on deck at all times. JEALOUSY: she’s jealous of people who seem breezily confident in themselves. though she seems very content with herself, she wishes she actually had that kind of easy comfort in her own skin. TEMPER: depends on the situation. certain people can get on her nerves more easily than others, but she’s not usually the type to have an outburst. EMPATHY: these days, she’s working on being a little more empathetic, especially since the murder club has a few people that she used to be pretty vicious towards. she’ll still lash out sometimes, but she’s trying. AFFECTION: little stuff — private smiles just for them, attempts to fill their needs before they even know they need it, generally trying to make sure that person is perfectly content. DISTASTE: just look for that characteristic derisive sneer. she’s not likely to hide it if she doesn’t like you. ETIQUETTE: etiquette is frenchie’s middle name. emily post who? RESPONSIBILITY: she does not like to admit that she’s wrong. it leaves a very bitter taste in her mouth. SELF ESTEEM: she’s not about to let anyone she sees as ‘lesser’ than her push her around. if you’re below her on the popularity food chain, she’s not gonna act like a little delicate flower. CONFIDENCE: depends on the day, her mood, etc. sometimes she’s all ‘i’m the hottest bitch ever to walk this earth’, and sometimes she feels like shrek. high school is magical. LEADER OR FOLLOWER: she tends to go with the flow more than anything. PRAISE: she loves a good compliment! boost that ego. CRITICISM: she takes genuine criticism VERY poorly. when confronted with her own flaws, she tends to lash out and try to dig twice as deep into her critic. the notable exception to this is her mother — she’ll take that criticism with little more than an apology and promise to do better. INSULTS: insults are much easier to laugh off, for whatever reason. they feel more surface-level to her. EMBARRASSMENT: not too easily embarrassed, but if she is, she’ll just turn red and not really know what to say. FLIRTING: not usually unless she’s drunk or specifically interested in someone, but she does sometimes think it’s fun to bat her eyes and smile prettily at football players just to watch them trip over themselves. ATTENTION SPAN: frenchie is a magpie. show her a pair of earrings and she’ll forget what she was saying entirely.

LIFE.

DUTY: no real responsibilities to speak of beyond being on time for practice. TECH: she’s been through three phones in the past year. that should speak for itself. COMBAT SKILLS: frenchie might not have bulk on her side, but she’s vicious enough to hold an attacker off for a minute or two. those perfectly manicured nails will go right for your eyes if you try to mess with her. HOME: she’s very organized. her room is nice and neat and very pleasant to be in. INDEPENDENCE: frenchie is absolutely dependent on her parents. she likes to pretend that she can do anything she wants on her own, but she’d be lost without them. COOKING: she’s actually a pretty good cook. growing up, her nana made sure she knew all the good southern recipes passed down through their family so she ‘could take care of her husband properly someday’. BUILDING: the idea of frenchie building anything is hysterical. SHOPPING: she shops constantly. i’m sure she’s bought things online literally during murder club meetings, and has come home with bags on bags of stuff before. DRIVING: she’s got a cute little baby blue VW bug, courtesy of daddy’s big bonus and presented to her on her sixteenth birthday. FINANCES: virtually all her money comes from her parents, who are very comfortable financially. her dad is a very successful lawyer, so frenchie will usually end up getting some sort of ‘allowance’ from him each month. this is often flexible — if she really wants something, she’s pretty much guaranteed to get it. PETS: she has a golden retriever named ollie. LAW: no ma’am, no sir. unless you count underage drinking. MEDICAL: she currently has doctor’s appointments out the wazoo to try and figure out what’s up with her voice. before that, she was pretty vigilant about going to the doctor/dentist. she takes care of herself! WORRIES: these days, it’s her voice. day and night, she wonders — will she get it back? is she stuck like this? what will she do if it never comes back? it’s an endless cycle, and the answer is always the same: she doesn’t know. PARTYING: frenchie actually loves to party. her mother supports it if she has ‘a nice young man to escort her’, AKA she’ll probably call up kaz and ask him to take her so she can go. HOBBIES: y’all, we all know this bitch does pageants and nothing else.

#— about.#— task.#normal:task1 #me suddenly remembering this was buried in my drafts #i also liked amanda’s trope idea so shout out to amanda for that one!

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idealisticrealism · 7 years ago

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Blindspot 3x05 recap

Aka the one where all my sons are idiots and all my daughters are precious angels who deserve all the hugs.

Late again, because when am I not? Again, I blame the travelling.

So I’m kinda intrigued by this pair; the bleeding, accented woman and the young guy with an American accent in what seems to be a super-dingy bathroom? What is going on here??

Patterson has been doing some fancy analysing of the adoption records and yeppp, Jane definitely had a kid. And ugh Patterson is so sweet and gentle about it and has done so much research so she could give Jane ALL the info and Jane is just Not Dealing. But hmmm Patterson tells her there’s no way to test if she’s had a child and lbr that’s not exactly true? A good ObGyn could generally tell just by looking at the cervix. Not a perfect measure, but it’s definitely an option. But anyhow Jane is too busy flipping out anyway, and ugh she mentions the Taylor Shaw thing and already having everything ripped away from her multiple times and man my heart just hurts for her rn. And Weller’s so at a loss for what to do or how to comfort her ugh my poor babies

Lol Reade and Zapata and their little Wizardville rivalry is super cute. And then she’s completely open with him and asks him directly about the State Department Guy thing and wow Reade just harshly shuts her down. I’m glad Patterson interrupts this little moment because it was definitely going nowhere good. But speaking of things that ARE good, omg I love her pun about the ‘backbone’ of the case and Weller being all killjoy about it haha. That’s right, honey, just ignore him. Your humour is too good for him anyway. And so anyhow the tatt leads to a NYPD evidence log number, though Zapata notes that the code is different to what the NYPD uses now, and Reade gets super snarky at her for it. Geez son, learn some manners! Patterson backs Zapata up tho (yaaassss my girls), showing that the code is like 20 years old. Jeller go to check out the warehouse it points to while Zapata is given paperwork by Reade (wow, petty), though tbh Zapata ends up with the better deal since Jeller have to fight some bad guys and literally put out a fire. Ugh the way Jane yells for him as she tries to fight the fire alone-- it’s only when its the two of them together that they manage to extinguish it. Symbolism, much? Patterson calls right at that moment to warn them to get out, and it’s a little late, but well, it’s the thought that counts haha. Other warehouses have been burned, which means someone is trying super hard to destroy evidence but doesn’t know where it is. Jane, because she’s amazing, finds the box they nee-- and in it is a whole bunch of untested rape kits going back 20 years. I love the conversation the guys have about the low priority assigned to sexual assault testing-- it’s some good commentary from the writers about the state of the real world.

Meanwhile, Stuart’s phone has been found in the river, and both Patterson and Zapata are very suspicious of the way Reade basically tells her to leave it alone. Looking super suss rn, bro, and I do not like it at allll.

However, I really DO like listening to Jane speak in other languages. So damn cool. And as someone who is currently staying in a foreign country and communicating solely in the local tongue, I have a renewed respect for her fluency lol. Their Russian suspect conveniently elects to speak English though haha. How handy. He’s a bit of a tough guy but through a sneaky move on Jeller’s part, he gives them the info they need-- how he got paid, which gives them a lead on the people hiring him. Patterson also drops another pun, which is three so far this ep and I’m so proud. She also figures out that the the victim was likely linked to Kazarus, which as far as I’m aware is a fake place though tbh my geography is not super great. But anyhow, that narrows their search to two sexual assault survivors.

And then aww Patterson pulls Weller aside and tries to support him about the whole surprise-kid thing, and ugh she’s just so sweet and wants to help both him and Jane as best she can. But he’s upset bc he knows he can’t fix this; no one can. I guess it all just takes time, right? Meanwhile Jane’s in the locker room, getting a call from Roman, and dude he really knew the whole time?? And ugh if she was sixteen when she had the baby (to her high school sweetheart aww) then he was probably about 14 at the time, just a kid himself who had suddenly become an uncle, and man I’m so sad for them both?? But lol she gets to the bullpen and covers the phone while practically yelling for them to trace the call. Not super subtle, Jane. And he tells her she initially fought Shepherd on giving the baby away and then she just ran away? I’m confused. I guess we now understand a bit more about why Remi joined the army though I guess. Not sure how she ever went back to working for Shepherd, though, but maybe she saw the memory wipe as a way out? And Beardy was meant to fill her in on everything including the kid. Idk. Jane’s now having a small breakdown in the locker room and decides she has to go see Shepherd, but Weller’s right when he says that Shepherd would just mess with her head. Don’t give her the satisfaction, Jane! And oh look, a mention of Bethany, haven’t had one of those in a while. And tbh that’s the way I like it, show, so keep ignoring her existence please haha.

In the lab, Patterson admits defeat about Stuart’s phone-- it’s as dead as he is. (Too soon??) But Zapata didn’t spend all that time at the CIA without gaining a few skills in the realms of deception and deviousness, and so they hatch a plan to bluff and lure out the possible mole. And then a lab tech in a headscarf calls them to see something, and the panning shot of the lab also shows another tech in a turban. Firstly, I approve of some diversity happening here, and secondly, I hope that this casting choice was deliberate so there would be people that looked at those characters and went “the traitor has to be one of them” so that when it’s shown that the traitor is someone else, the people watching have to examine just why it was that they thought either of these two background characters were guilty. (Hint: it’s racism!). Anyhow, the rape kit in question has been tested, and it turns out the rapist is the king of Kazarus. Or, the former king, since he died and his brother has assumed the throne. The only spanner in the works being that the rape resulted in a child, who, as per the Kazarussian monarchy, is the rightful heir to the throne. Which naturally means that Scar’s gotta have him taken out. Now we know who we saw at the start of the ep-- the kid and his mother, who was clearly attacked by the assassins but escaped. Now it’s a race for the team to find them before the Kazarussians do.

And then who appears but Weitz, who is now a congressman, and conveniently an expert on Kazarus. I love that everyone looks at Hirst and she’s all “Don’t look at me, Darlins” and how is someone using ‘darling’ in plural like that so damn endearing??? The accent is what truly makes it though, obviously. But nope, it was Reade who called him, which is just another in the list of things Reade has done lately that we do not like. Weitz manages to make everyone hate him even more within mere seconds of showing up, and tbh I love to hate him. His antagonism towards Zapata is hilarious. I like that even Hirst gives him some shit lol. Atta girl. Anyhow Weitz informs them that the ex-king’s brother Cyrus is a Bad Dude and there’s a bunch of american soldiers in Kazarus that are now at risk, and yep the stakes have just been raised

Reade gets called into the principal’s office to discuss his little spat with Zapata. How exactly does Hirst know about that, though? Though I guess if she’s paid attention to any of their interactions today then she probably could have figured it out. I’m offended that he calls Zapata a busybody?? But then he does at least say that she’s nothing to worry about and that she’s a friend. What do you two have to hide though??? Meanwhile in the lab, Patterson has found the kid by examining the curtains in a video that the kid sent to his gf. That’s my lil genius. Of course it’s super convenient that this type of curtain is only made for a specific motel chain, but whatevs, I’ll let it slide as I do with many things in this show haha. I love Zapata teasing Weitz though, suggesting that it was all too smart for him and went over his head haha

Jane’s clearly taking this case pretty personally-- and tbh it does seem veeeeeeeery convenient that there’s a case that resonates so closely with her current situation, until you remember that this time around, all the tattoos are specifically designed by Roman to be revealed in a certain order, so it makes total sense that the case matches stuff going on in their personal lives. More sense than when it happened in the last two seasons, so touche, writers. You win this round. Anyway they get to the hotel, and the kid immediately pulls a gun on them. His mom’s not looking too good though, kinda bleeding out a little on the bed, and ugh Jane does her frightened-animal whisperer thing and convinces the kid to let her help his mom. Naturally he chooses to trust her bc lbr wouldn’t you?? They get his mom to the hospital where she’s super well guarded, and he tells them about only learning at 18 about his mother’s attack. And he only learned yesterday about the whole king thing, and tells them he’ll never go to Kazarus. You just know that Jane is thinking about her baby and how the kid probably wouldn’t want to know her as they must think she abandoned them, and ugh it hurts. Why must you do this, show?

Back in the lab Patterson and Zapata have set their trap, and are waiting to see who falls into it-- only they don’t like the answer. According to her computer, Reade logged into the system to delete the files. Patterson is grim; she doesn’t like it, but she’s ready to believe it. When Zapata tries to insist that Reade wouldn’t do it, that he’s family, Patterson just reminds her: Borden was family too. And ugggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I do not like this at all. I am so done with leaks and moles and traitors and all of it ugh. I do appreciate Weitz for making me smile here; Zapata is back at her desk and he throws a paper airplane at her, then feigns confusion, looking around for who could have done it. Tbh I actually do ship these two a little bit. All the bickering just does it for me lol. She gives him shit about probably not going to be re-elected, but he says he’s doing great in the polls. She says polls have been wrong before-- and is that some political commentary I hear? Man who was the writer of this ep because they are not pulling punches today. Reade comes over and tries to mend bridges, which tbh tastes a little sour after he was such an asshole this morning... give him nothing, Zapata!

Looks like Yasmine is gonna live, which is nice. She and Jane bond a little over protecting kids etc while Weller and the kid go to get something from the vending machine--- and ugh when they’re coming back Wller notices their guard from the door is gone and pushes the kid behind him. I love protective Weller. I also love Weller throwing an injured woman over his shoulder and carrying her to safety. Damn. He also proved pretty smart-- when they realised that the baddies were on their FBI comms, he bluffed and reported that they were headed for the roof while they escaped out the front door instead. Nice. Though why do I feel like that escape was too easy?

Patterson has figured out that it’s not Reade that’s tampering with their evidence, but someone else using his login. She confesses to Zapata about the backdoor that Wizardville gives her into people’s phones, and says she’s never used it before, which isn’t true though right?? Didn’t she use it on that Lowie guy’s lawyer a few eps ago? Anyway Zapata doesn’t care about the illegal biz, she just wants to hear her best(?) friend’s name cleared. Turns out he wasn’t even in the building when someone used an FBI computer to access their files, so that’s at least looking good for him, even if it is bad for them as a whole

Weller reports in, and the team tracks their phones and immediately sends backup-- but too late, considering that the baddies have laid out a trap for them. Was this why it was so easy for them to get away?? Jeller manage to take out several bad dudes on their own, but not before one of them manages to molotov-cocktail their car, which blows up moments later. Dude that’s one potent cocktail… but ugh they all make it to safety, with Weller again literally carrying Yasmine, and ugh the mother and son hug and the husband and wife hug and it’s just a very poignant moment okay?? Also there’s just something really beautiful about the way Jane hugs, I can’t even really describe it. Anyhow they all make it back to the NYO, where the rest of the team (plus Weitz, in his own way) are super glad to see them alive. After a minute Zapata and Patterson sneak off, because Patterson needs to tell her the news-- the person using Reade’s login was Hirst. She’s sure because of biometric software that she runs on all of their computers, and again, man I’m super glad that these powers are in the hands of someone trustworthy like Patterson haha. But ugh this means my honey-accented cool aunt is a baddie?? She even knew that Lowie guy from a few eps ago. Well, bummer. Still holding out for the possibility that there’s more to it, but things aren’t looking great...

Oh dear, King Cyrus was murdered, and the Kazarussians are demanding their heir. Which really sucks for the kid, and Jane and Weller try to protect him, but he’s determined to go and to make things better for his fellow Kazarussians. And lbr, to have to go become king is not the worst thing??

Wow Patterson and Zapata actually went to Reade to warn him about Hirst. I don’t know why that surprises me, but it does. I would have done some more surveillance or something first? But anyway he is really not taking it well, and kinda attacks both of them a bit over it. And wait he’s known Hirst since he was in Quantico??? That’s news to me. And not good news, either. Please don’t be dirty, Reade. Please…

Jeller are recovering at home after a pretty damn rough day. Jane has changed her mind about finding her daughter-- she wants her just to have a happy, stable life, and that willl be far easier if she never knows Jane exists. And he just hugs her bc what can you do to make that pain better? Nothing, that’s what. She’s going to mourn her connection with her daughter for the rest of her life and ugh it just really sucks

Oh no a time jump, nothing good ever follows a time jump. And oh shit it’s Berlin. Weller’s having no luck with a rude hotel employee, which I find super unbelievable because a) he’s front desk staff at a fancy hotel, b) the person asking him for help is a man clearly traumatised about his missing wife, and c) he’s German. Him being rude makes no sense. But it does give this girl a cool opening to come help Weller out, and man I am jealous of her German speaking skills. Like I said earlier, it’s not easy!! But wait, there’s more. The girl is not only American, but she’s looking for Jane. Her mother, Jane. And oh Weller, you stupid, stupid boy. You foolish, well-meaning idiot. I am sure that your reasons for not telling Jane about this are all purely to protect her (although I also suspect you’re trying to protect yourself from her leaving you again) but dude. DUDE. This is not the kind of secret you should ever keep, and honestly if Jane leaves your ass when she finds out the truth I’m gonna be on her side of the split. Ugh, my stupid son when will you ever LEARN

#Blindspot #Jeller #Blindspot recap

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the-first-date · 5 years ago

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A conversation with Emma Zack [27/F/Brooklyn]

Madge Maril: Hello Emma!! Thank you for joining me on gchat this lovely evening. What are you up to today?

Emma Zack: HEY DARLIN! I'm here at my desk, doing my job. You know, the usual.

MM: Yes! Usual. What's your job?

EZ: Suppose you could say I have two! My day job (9-5) is as the publications manager at the Innocence Project. My other job, which only recently turned into another full-time job, is being the owner of a plus-sized vintage shop, Berriez!

MM: Well now I have to ask how you got into both.

EZ: Haha. Do it.

MM: How did you get into these two very different positions?

EZ: I'll start with the Innocence Project. I've studied prisons/criminology since I was a freshman in college. I worked in prisons/in the criminal justice sphere in college, and after college, decided that I wanted to continue on this path. I got a job at the Innocence Program in Boston, which then led me to the Innocence Project in NYC! And as for Berriez, I started it because I needed a hobby. I was (and still am tbh) really depressed, and needed something to get my mind smiling. Also, I had a bunch of clothing. Also also, I was shopping vintage online often and was never finding my size. So, all of those factors led me to start Berriez!

MM: So many questions — but maybe the weirdest one first. So you're from Boston, and now you live in NYC. What's that experience like? Do you feel like a cool New Yorker? I've heard that's a feeling.

EZ: Lol!! Quite the opposite, really. I oftentimes feel like a loser. I am a homebody and rarely leave the house, unlike most New Yorkers. Also, I move at a very slow pace, and New York is so. Freakin. Fast. It's hard to keep up. But, I will say that it's 854930574389574 times better than boring ole Boston!

MM: I've also heard about this fast pace. But honestly I don't think I know what it means? Is it more just how busy people are?

EZ: It's the strangest thing. Since I moved to New York, I've developed insomnia, am bad at responding to texts/keeping in touch with people (which I used to be so good at before NYC), and seeing people — even my best friends — is hard because everyone is just so "busy." Not sure what we're all doing, but all I know is that we're busy. Also, let's talk about how everyone here walks fast. I truly can't keep up. I walk so slow, and people make fun of me for it all the time… like, let a girl walk at her own pace!

MM: Hahaha that's really all I've ever connected in my brain before when I've heard about New Yorkers pace — like a literal fast walking pace.

EZ: It's true!

MM: And I know you have a ~ partner. Did y'all meet in Boston or NYC?

EZ: Nope, we met here in NYC!

MM: What was that like? Do you think the NYC climate of fast-paced energy affected it at all?

EZ: What was meeting my partner in NYC like?

MM: Yeah! It seems so idyllic to me, a midwesterner, while also seeming like it could be intense with how busy people are.

EZ: Oh yeah, it really just kind of happened. And I met him only a month after I moved here! It was so unplanned. When we met, I knew there was something there, something special. I wouldn't say it was NYC though — I'd say it was the ~universe~ and the timing of it all meeting each other at certain points in our lives where we could commit to each other, etc.

MM: So do you believe in fate?

EZ: Lol, no.

MM: Hahahaha.

EZ: But I believe that everything happens for a reason? Bad or good? Is that fate? I don't think so. I also don't believe in "1 tru luv.”

MM: I don't think I do either! Though I really did as a kid. Like X Files... I want to believe.

EZ: Totally… I did too! But not anymore, even though I love my partner so much. And want to stay with him.

MM: I think those two things can co exist, because same for me with mine — a love, but also realizing that there have been other people, and could be other people, and that you're actively choosing this one person right now though.

EZ: Exactly!

MM: Also while I am extremely enjoying this I can feel the unseen reader wanting me to ask you about Berriez.

EZ: Of course, of course. Lemme hear the questions!

MM: Where to begin! You mentioned a lot that I want to know more about — starting a business (can't imagine), starting a business with depression, online vintage, plus-size vintage. Can you tell me more about any of those things, whatever you want to tell me about?

EZ: Hmmmmmm. Well, I suppose when I started Berriez (formerly known as Fruity Looms), I didn't intend for it to be a "Business.” Or, rather, I didn't think of it as a business. I just thought of it as something I was doing in my free time with my friends (who would model for me).

MM: RIP Fruity Looms.

EZ: RIP FRUITY LOOMS 💔. It started to take off about 4 months in I'd say, that's when it started to get a bit more busy. Then, over the summer, it truly turned into a "business"/full-time job… it's still something I do in my free time, but it's no longer a hobby per se. It's a job. I still love it with all my heart! It's just a lot more work than when I started.

MM: I was about to ask — that can be hard, right? Turning a passion project into a job. I feel like it's not something that's talked about a lot, and people really idealize creatives who get to work in their own creative fields — especially fashion because glamour! Glam! But then there's this unspoken weight where you've morphed something you love into your "Career.”

EZ: Yup!! It's very weird, and I'm in this strange place where I really don't know what I'm doing or what I want to do, because I've done criminal justice work for so long, and Berriez really just popped in out of nowhere… do I want to take that risk? Leaving criminal justice to pursue Berriez full-time? I don't know! I suppose I could always go back. It doesn't seem reliable to me. It's scary.

MM: Why?

EZ: Well... money, for starters! And I work well having a set schedule. Wake up at 6 to work on Berriez, go to my other job, come home to work on Berriez. If I didn't have my other job, would it be hard for me to fill that time? Would I be strict enough with myself? Also, when I don't have structure, I fall into a depression. Although, shit, I'm depressed now and I have all the structure in the world! Also side note: not glamorizing this busy NYC lifestyle. It is not fun. It is not healthy. Wow, am I talking too much? It's like you're my therapist or something. Lemme take a step back, ha!

MM: Omg no. I love it! Please talk about this as much as you like. I think it's all important, especially the reality that goes on behind the Instagram screen (poetry, I know). Because real talk when I first met you online, I was like wow! Look at her! Doing it all! Fashion! Rising star! It's so easy to project those sort of things online.

EZ: Yep, yep. Instagram is a ~facade~ amiright?!?! Lmaoooo!! In reality... I'm just a homebody/stoner/depressed/anxious/chronically ill/loving gal.

MM: Which is so much better! And realer! Is it odd to interact with so many people in Berriez and also the Innocence Project that are sort of living that facade, do-it-all life? I feel like fashion and law may have close ties; it's all very ~chic~ non?

EZ: YES YES YES. Everyone's just trying to do it all and take care of themselves. But who are we doing it all for? That's what I've been asking myself lately.

MM: Do you feel like this intensity affects your style, and how you dress at work or on Instagram (your other work)?

EZ: Interesting question. I've never thought about it that way. I feel like Berriez has really really really helped me ~find my style~ which is like, middle school art teacher... Lol. Lots of color, lots of fun, lots of patterns.

I'm a bigger gal, but I don't give a fuck if something isn't "flattering" per se. I come to my day job at the IP dressed like this too, since we don't have a dress code. And I am always getting compliments from my coworkers! Although they may think I'm a little nutty. Today I am wearing space buns, a red and white checkered long sleeve shirt, rhinestone hoops, vintage Levi’s, and these funny looking boots. Oh well. Did that answer your question at all? Ha.

MM: Yes!! Were you surprised when your own personal aesthetic caught on online via Berriez? Not because it's ~weird~ (to me... It is perfect) but because I'd personally find it so nice/scary/surprising if the style I'd curated, my look, resonated with people like yours does.

EZ: I guess, like, I never thought of myself as having an "aesthetic." I've kind of just always worn what I wanted to/who I've been inspired by. My friends though have always told me that I have great style and encouraged me to start a public Instagram for my outfits, but I've always been too shy. With Berriez, I can do that without showing my face!

MM: Aw, that is so sweet. And so what does Emma Zack, stylish person, wear on a first date?

EZ: Hahahaha! I can tell you exactly what I wore on my first date with Aja. Which was three years ago, by the way! I would never wear this now. I wore tan Clarks, black opaque tights, a hunter green bodycon turtleneck midi dress (that really accentuated my curves), and a black bomber jacket. My goal was to show off my body in a modest way!

MM: Sensible. Sexy. So this would've been 2016?

EZ: Yep! Today... Hmm. I would probably still wear something to show off my body. I love my curves.

MM: Oh I'm a big show-off-on-the-first-date person. I wore the tiniest black dress on my first date with my bf. And it was also a turtleneck! I am just now realizing. I felt like it gave me that "I read books" vibe.

EZ: Hahaha, yup! Lol. For me it was, "I listen to jazz."

MM:: Yes! Because you're a jazz singer, right? Also would love to hear about your perfume/makeup combo if you remember it!

EZ: Yup! I sing jazz! That used to be my hobby, until I moved to New York and convinced myself that I wasn't good enough! Ha ha ha. Oh yes, I definitely remember it. I don't wear much makeup in general, so I was wearing mascara, concealer under my eyes, and maybe some chapstick! As for perfume, I was wearing Cannabis Santal by Fresh.

MM: What comes first for you, outfit or makeup or perfume?

EZ: Outfit, always! Makeup, I don't know how to put on makeup, so I always just wear the same thing. Perfume, I rotate between the same three perfumes (that are all musky).

MM: Which are?

EZ: The cannabis one, and then these two perfume oils that I can't remember the names of.

MM: Haha it's ok! I live for musk. This is maybe tangentially related but it's where my brain is going... How do you stay authentic to yourself? I feel like as soon as I started working in fashion, I had this huge feeling of shame, that I wasn't dressing right or knew the right stuff. Do you feel that? How do you defeat it?

EZ: I guess I don't feel it because I don't feel like I work in fashion? I mean, I suppose I do work in "fashion" or whatever, but the stakes aren't as high as working at a magazine or a blog or whatever! I just wear what I like at this point. Or what I feel like wearing!

And, as I've gotten older and more comfortable with myself, I've started to give less of a shit about what other people think of me or the way I dress. Don't get me wrong though, sometimes I'm totally like, do I look insane??? If I go to an event dressed like this, will I fit in?!

MM: Yes! Those are my main feelings, as someone who used to wear a ton of color and print and has been shying away from it.

EZ: Meh. Sometimes I feel like Berriez to be more minimal, and I need to sell more earth tones and plain shit like most vintage shops do. But that's just not me, that's never been me. I'm a straight-up maximalist hahahaha! That's not who Berriez is or why people like it!

MM: I really admire that about you! And your business! And that you have a business, haha.

EZ: Lol at me having a business.

MM: You do! You truly do!! Final question, since I know we've been chatting for a minute — how was your last first date?

EZ: Welp, it was in a dark bar, and it was with a cute dude who I'm still with to this day! So, I guess you could say it was a good one. 😉

MM: Ooooooo I would say so! Thank you so much for talking to me about so many things. Do you have any digital spaces you want to shout out?

EZ: Of course!! Thank you for asking me to talk!! I'm honored!! No, just @shopberriez!!! 😉❤

MM: You heard it hear first folks. Go follow the shop. Here*. Wow. Ok.

EZ: LOLOL!a

#style #the first date

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