#just between y’all and me i think they’d win

[imaginespazzi]

Part 9: These Moments Of Ours

Masterlist - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 10 - Part 11

Just crash, it's our time now (to make this work second time around)

(In which a people-pleasing author gives the people what they've been begging for)

Pairing: Paige Bueckers X Azzi Fudd

Themes: Fluff with a little bit Angst

Words: 7.2K Words

TW: Explicit Sexual Content, Swearing

A/N: Hello my lovelies <3 Thank you for being oh so patient with me because I know I really made y'all wait and hopefully it'll be worth the wait. I'm gonna keep this pretty short and sweet today so onto the usual. Please keep sending me your thoughts and theories; they're the best motivation a girl could ask for. I did edit but feel free to point out the inevitable typos/mistakes. As always, let me know what you liked, what you disliked and what you'd like to see going forward. Have a lovely rest of your week my loves :)

April 2030 

UConn 84   Notre Dame 82 

The blue and white section of the Moda Center crowd erupts in cheers as the final buzzer rings through the stadium. Confetti rains down on the court as the UConn Huskies are crowned national champions once again. Paige’s scream is drowned out by KK’s louder whoop as the two of them excitedly wrap their arms around each other, jumping up and down like they’re college students all over again. 

“Oh okay, love the inclusion,” Ice rolls her eyes but it morphs into a grin as her former teammates pull her into their group hug, all three of them making a ruckus that’s drowned out by the crowd around them roaring in excitement. 

“Can y’all be a little quieter. I’m tryna mourn my Irish in peace,” Sonia says lousily, glaring at them in irritation as she fiddles with her clover bracelet. 

“Oh cheer up Citron,” Paige teases her Wings teammate, “at least y’all finally made it back to the Final Four.”

“Fuck all the way off Bueckers-”

“GO HUSKIES,” a loud voice interrupts Sonia’s grumbling as Jana rushes into their section, the Valkyries center smiling vibrantly as she crashes into her old friends, “BLEED BLUE BABY!”

“Bleed blue!” the three UConn faithful chorus back as Sonia glumly saunters over to Maddy Westbeld who had come over with Jana, the two Fighting Irish alum sharing a commiserating hug. 

“This is why everyone finds you Huskies insufferable,” Maddy says with disgust. 

“Because we just keep winning? There, there little leprechauns,” Ice taunts, light-heartedly patting Maddy and Sonia’s heads as both of them bristle and flash the Wings forward with a synchronized middle finger, “I’m sure you’ll catch up to us never.”

Paige is about to join in on the ribbing when KK turns to Jana with a frown, “where’s Azzi? I thought all of y’all came together.”

She shouldn’t care this much anymore. It’s been five years and Paige thinks it’s a little ridiculous how quickly her ears perks up at the mention of her girlfriend, thinks it’s a little pathetic how she leans in closer to Jana, embarrassingly eager to hear the answer to KK’s question. 

“We did. She wanted to go call her parents to check on Stephie,” Jana explains. 

KK rolls her eyes, her face as disappointed as Paige feels, “of course she did.”

“What’s that supposed to mean,” Jana narrows her eyes at the shorter woman, a protective edge to her tone.  

“It means that this avoidance bullshit Azzi’s on is pretty fucking tired,” KK sneers. 

“KK bro chill,” Ice steps in immediately, looking worriedly between her two friends as Jana’s eyes flash with fire. 

“She’s checking on her daughter KK. She’s not trying to avoid anything,” Jana’s quietness is in stark contrast with the loud cheers around them and Paige swallows the guilt clawing at her throat. This is their fault. Her and Azzi’s. They’d caused an earthquake in their own lives and the aftershocks had rippled throughout their friends and families, creating rubble where there had once been solid foundations. 

KK laughs bitterly, “she had to check on her daughter right now? The game ended like three fucking seconds ago and she couldn’t just wait?”

“You’re being unfair.”

“Why are you always defending her?”

“Because she’s my teammate and it’s not all her fault,” Jana spits out, eyes briefly darting towards Paige who digs her fingernails into her palm, “it’s not her fault that she doesn’t always feel welcome around certain people.”

“And how about the rest of us people who’d really like to see her once in a while?” hurt tinges in KK’s words, “she can’t put the other shit aside for one fucking second?”

Jana opens her mouth, ready to defend her Azzi again but before she can speak, a calm voice cuts in, “hi guys.”

Goosebumps rush up Paige’s arms as she takes in the sight of the ex-girlfriend. There’s nothing extravagant to Azzi’s outfit, a simple UConn sweatshirt paired with black ripped jeans and minimal jewelry but she looks as radiant as always. There’s an awkward tension in the air as Azzi warily takes in the way KK and Jana are still glaring at each other. Her eyes accidentally lock with Paige and the blonde can see the same guilt of this is our collateral damage reflected back in those dark brown orbs. 

“Hi Azzi,” Ice is the first one to break the silence, wrapping the Valkyries shooting guard in a hug, “how’s Stephanie?”

Paige watches as Azzi’s eyes light up at the mention of her daughter's name, all of her previous apprehension gone as she begins to gush about the little girl, “she’s good. Somehow manipulated my dad into letting her stay up past her bedtime but good. She’s only two years old but already such a damn menace,” the brunette’s gaze wanders over to KK, “I guess that was to be expected huh? Any child of mine was bound to be one.”

KK cracks a half smile, bumping her shoulder against Jana’s as a truce sign, “you call it being menace, we call it being smart as hell right El Alfy?”

“Dude that’s what I tell her every time,” Jana immediately accepts the white flag, slinging an arm around the shorter woman, “Azzi just has genius children. Me, you, Nés and now Stephie.”

Ice gawks at the two of them, “seriously?”

“Well you see Ice, statistically she can’t have all genius children. Someone needed to be average,” KK mocks, high-fiving a giggling Jana. 

“Are y’all seeing this bullying?” Ice rounds on Paige and Azzi, hands on her hips with dramatically wide eyes, “are y’all really gonna let them bully your favorite child like this?”

“We don’t have favorites,” Paige and Azzi say at the same, pausing abruptly at the resurgence of familiar synchronicity between them. They glance briefly at each other, shuffling nervously, before immediately looking away. 

“I hate all of y’all,” Ice pouts, petulantly folding her arms against her chest. 

“Aw cheer up Icey,” Jana pats the top of Ice’s head, “how about a round of shots at the hotel bar to cheer you up?” she turns to Maddy and Sonia, who’d been having their own conversation, with a devilish grin, “losing team’s paying.”

“Y’all are sore winners,” Maddy huffs. 

Paige’s eyes dart towards Azzi, waiting for the younger woman to come up with a shallow excuse like she usually does to get out of having to spend more time with the blonde than necessary. And she knows that it’s unfair of her, knows that it’s only natural for someone to actively avoid being stuck in the same place as their past -thinks only a fool like her could want to be in their ex’s presence- but every time Azzi escapes being around her, Paige can’t help the disappointment that curls in her stomach. 

“Y’all coming,” KK asks, a slight edge to her voice as she twists to look at Paige and Azzi. 

“Of course,” Paige grins, locking arms with Sonia who immediately groans, “I’m not passing up free drinks. Especially not when the Irish are paying.”

“Az?” KK’s eyes are hopeful. 

Azzi bites her lip and Paige can almost see the cogs turning in her brain before she schools her features into a soft smile, “yeah. I’ll come.”

*** 

Paige isn’t sure how it happens. Well actually, that’s not quite right. She definitely has an idea of how it happened. She’s not quite sure when KK, Ice and Jana had had time to devise the plan but she’s certain that’s how it happened. Because really, there’s no other reasonable explanation for how she and Azzi have ended up being the only two people, from their previous party of seven, that are still sitting at the bar. Maddy and Sonia had left first, muttering under their breaths about not wanting to be around insufferable winners. Ice had been the next to leave, making up an excuse about how she wanted to call her boyfriend. Then Jana had apparently needed the bathroom. When she hadn’t returned in a solid 15 minutes, it was KK’s turn. A barely disguised grin and a hard-to-believe lie of  I think Jana got lost, I should go help her on her lips as she’d excused herself to the sound of Paige and Azzi’s protests. 

The two of them sit in awkward silence for a bit until Azzi suddenly bursts out laughing, the corner of her eyes crinkling. Paige regards her with amusement, trying to ignore the way the sound of the younger woman laughing feels like hearing her favorite song come on in the car on a warm summer road trip. 

“You’re a little young to be going crazy,” she remarks. 

“Shut up,” Azzi rolls her eyes, lightly punching Paige’s shoulder, “it’s just- they’re still all really shitty liars.”

Paige laughs, “and they still come up with the dumbest plans.”

“Do you remember when they locked us in the Werth changing rooms when we had that stupid fight-”

“Hey,” Paige interrupts indignantly, “it wasn’t stupid-”

“It was definitely stupid-”

“You asked Carol to drive you to rehab instead of me.”

“Because you had practice at the same time.”

“I wouldn’t have minded being five minutes late to practice.”

Azzi snorts, “more like half an hour and you sure as shit wouldn’t have been fine when coach would have yelled at you and made you run suicides after.”

“I wouldn’t have cared,” Paige shrugs, “running suicides would have been worth it for an extra hour with you.”

Azzi stares at her, mouth opening and closing several times before she finally looks away, a soft sigh falling from her lips, “you’re doing it again.”

“I’m not doing anything,” Paige says, unable to keep the defensiveness from creeping into her words. 

“You are,” Azzi slips off the barstool, “you are and you don’t even know it.”

“Azzi,” Paige curls her hand around the other woman’s bicep, pulling her in to stop her from leaving and it’s a bad idea because now they’re too close and her heartbeat quickens immediately at the fact that if she leaned in just a little bit more, there would be no more space left between them, “what am I doing?”

“You’re- you-” Azzi stutters, gulping as her eyes briefly flicker down to Paige’s lips, “you’re making me feel.”

“Making you feel what?” Paige presses. 

For a second, Paige thinks Azzi might just give in to her heart, might just tell the truth but then something hardens in her face, and the next word that slips out of her mouth has both of them going rigid, “how’s your wife Paige?”

“Az-”

“I should go to bed,” Azzi says firmly, trying to wriggle out of Paige’s tightening grip. 

“Azzi-”

“I have an early flight and I should probably wake up a little earlier than I normally would cause you know Jana’s gonna need me to wake her up,” Azzi rambles still trying to twist her arm out of Paige’s hold. 

“Hold on-”

“Can you just let go of me-”

“I’m trying to tell-”

“I really need to get to bed-’

“Az-”

“I have to go-”

“Azzi I’m getting a divorce,” Paige bursts out; the admission feels light a heavy weight off her chest.

Azzi stops fighting against the blonde’s grip, “oh.”

“We’ve- um-” Paige’s throat feels dry as Azzi’s eyes continue to bore into her, “we’ve been separated for a while and I finally-uh- finally filed the papers a little while ago. So um- to your question- I uh- I don’t know how she is because I- I don’t- there uh- there isn’t- there isn’t a wife.”

There’s silence for a bit as Azzi’s head bops up and down as she processes Paige’s revelation, “I’m um-” she clears her throat, “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. It’s not like it’s your fault,” and that’s not completely true -not when Olivia had repeatedly thrown the past back in Paige’s face- but she doesn’t think Azzi needs to know that, doesn’t want the younger woman to feel guilty for things beyond her control. She’s confused when Azzi flinches, like a memory has just pinched her nerves. 

“Right,” Azzi bites, “I really should- I really should be going to bed.”

Something gloomy settles across Paige’s heart as she nods at the brunette’s words, slipping out of her own chair as they start walking towards the elevator in the lobby. She feels antsy, like she’s leaving something incomplete. The silence rings loud between them as they wait for the elevator doors to open, keeping as much distance as they can from each other. It feels like ages before the familiar ding! finally rings out around them. Despite the abundance of room inside, the doorway into the elevator is rather condensed and their shoulders brush against each other as they make their way inside. Audible sighs involuntarily roll off of their tongues at the brief second of contact as they both shiver from each other’s familiar touch. There’s enough space now that they could easily move away -they probably should move away- but instead they stay pressed together. The sound of their uneven breathing fills the elevator as the doors close in front of them.

“I’m uh- I’m on the third floor,” Azzi says as she presses the #3 button, “you?”

“Fifth,” Paige breathes out, eyes fixated on the goosebumps that appear on the back of Azzi’s neck as her hands shake while pushing the #5 button. 

The elevator jolts up and Paige immediately reaches for Azzi’s hips to steady her, eliciting a small gasp from the other woman. She waits for Azzi to move away but the brunette stays put and Paige doesn’t move her hands. 

The doors open on the third floor. Both of them suck in a sharp breath. 

Azzi doesn’t get out. 

*** 

Paige wakes up to the dreadful sound of her alarm clock blaring around her room. It takes a second before the memories of last night start pounding against her skull. Her body aches in the best way possible. The room is still dark -just like it had been last night- and she closes her eyes, trying to revisit the feeling of Azzi’s lips pressed against her forehead, right before the younger woman -with her hair disheveled and bitemarks littered across her jawline-  had left Paige’s room. 

Paige hadn’t asked Azzi to stay. She wonders if she should have; wonders if Azzi would have agreed if she’d asked. But she hadn’t asked and Azzi hadn’t stayed. She regrets it a little bit. She wonders if Azzi does too. And Paige thinks that maybe that’s just the melancholic truth about their tragic story. 

Maybe they’re destined to always regret. 

*** 

April 2033

Paige thinks Azzi’s guest room air conditioning must be broken or something. There’s no other explanation for why, despite having kicked off every single blanket, she feels like she’s tossing and turning in red hot lava. She feels restless, like she has a purpose that she’s leaving unfulfilled. All the different scenes from tonight are rushing through her head, but her heart keeps stuttering on the last one; an image of the way Azzi had looked at her before they’d kissed good night. 

Azzi had asked her to stay even if she’d hidden it under a lame disguise of it being too late and Paige being too angry to drive home alone. And it’s not completely false that her blood is still boiling, their little encounter with fucking asshole still dangerously lingering in her mind as she thinks of the 101 ways she would have liked to murder him. But they both know that the minute Azzi had run her hand down Paige’s back, the moment she’d called her baby, the moment she’d given her the reassurance she was too scared to ask for but needed desperately, Paige had felt all the anger in her body replaced by that familiar sense of calm only Azzi had ever been able to provide. 

And after that had been decided, they’d both hesitated in the hallway, looking back and forth between Azzi’s master bedroom and the guestroom. Paige doesn’t know what had possessed her, why she’d decided tonight of all nights to play this false chivalrous rule-abiding good girl persona when it was the last thing she wanted to do. Because the last couple of weeks had been hell. The stupid rules had been hell. Going slow had been hell. Having to pull away from Azzi and walk out the door every night when all she wanted to was to lose herself in the brunette’s arms had been hell. But she’d done it for Azzi. She’d done it because there isn’t a thing in the world that she wouldn’t do for Azzi. Except tonight had been different. There had been that look on Azzi’s face -the way the younger woman had bitten her lips, the way her eyes had been hooded over, the way her cheeks had been flushed as her gaze roamed over Paige’s body- and  it had morphed into one of pure disappointment when Paige had said she’d take the guestroom. 

You’re a fucking idiot Paige Bueckers, she thinks to herself as she bolts right up, the image finally burning a little too bright behind her eyelids to continue this façade of trying to sleep. Perhaps it’s pointless. It’s late and Azzi loves her sleep; there’s no way she’s awake. But Paige slides out of bed anyways, breathing unevenly as she turns on the nightlight and walks towards her door. She doesn’t have a plan, doesn’t have any idea what she’d even say if Azzi is, by some miracle of god, even awake. But fuck it, Paige needs to see this through. She pauses at the door, hands wrapping around the cold handle as she gives herself one more chance to back out. Really, she doesn’t even know why she’s so nervous. It’s Azzi. Her Azzi. 

Paige twists the handle to tug the door open. 

Azzi’s eyes widen in surprise, her fisted hand -that had clearly been raised to knock on the mahogany door- freezing in place as she swallows and Paige is mesmerized by the way it highlights the veins in her neck. Her eyes move downwards, fixating on where Azzi’s oversized t-shirt hangs looser on one-side, leaving her right shoulder and collarbone on display. The shirt right above her thighs, giving Paige the perfect display of Azzi’s toned long legs looming beneath and the blonde gulps at the sight. 

“Hi,” Azzi speaks first, the low graveliness in her tone causing a coil of want to wrap itself around Paige’s stomach. 

“Hey,” Paige whispers back, “couldn’t sleep?”

Azzi bites her lip, “no- I just uh-, people always say- like when Jana sleeps over or something- she always says that- that the guest room is um- it’s too cold so I just- I wanted to make sure- wanted to ask-” she clears her throat, taking a step forward as she look earnestly at Paige, “are you cold?”

“So cold,” Paige confirms, moving closer to Azzi so their chests are almost touching. 

“You could um-” Azzi licks her teeth, “you could stay in Stephie’s room-” 

“I could?” Paige asks, pressing herself flush against the younger woman, hands wrapping around her waist. There’s barely space for air between them but she wants to get closer, wants to stitch herself into Azzi’s skin and keep them intertwined forever. 

“You could but,” Azzi’s hand trails Paige’s biceps, causing the blonde to shiver, before finally interlocking around her neck, “I think- I think her bed might be a little small for you.”

“Way too small,” Paige breathes against Azzi’s skin as she nips at the brunette’s jawline, before ghosting her lips against her neck, leaving a trail of mine mine mine down her throat.

“Paige,” Azzi’s voice is breathless as she tilts her head, hissing when Paige bites harshly right above her collarbone, immediately soothing it with her tongue, “I think- I think-fuck” she cuts herself with a moan as Paige turns them around, maneuvering them back towards the bed that suddenly looks far more inviting then it had before,  “I just think-”

“You think too much,” Paige says softly, finally removing her lips from Azzi’s skin -she misses the taste of it immediately- so she can smile teasingly at the brunette. 

“Do I?” Azzi grins dopily. 

Paige rolls her eyes, continuing to walk them backwards, “way, way too much.”

They’re forced to a halt when the back of Azzi’s thighs collide against the backframe of the bed. It feels like a turning point, like they could unlock a new chapter or keep themselves on the one they’re already on. And while Paige would really to skip forward, she’ll be okay with whatever happens next as long as the story being written is still theirs, still about her and Azzi. 

“Paige,” Azzi whispers again -and Paige loves the way Azzi’s lips curl around the syllable of her name- as she bunches the blonde’s shirt in her hands, “make me stop thinking.”

“Whatever you want baby,” Paige promises before they both go tumbling into the mattress, their lips colliding in a heated kiss. It feels like they’re trying to meld themselves into each other, like their bodies are carving out an indent of you and i just always feel right against the bedsheets. 

“I want this off,” Azzi breathes out between kisses, hands lifting the edge of Paige’s shirt, “off, off, off.”

“So bossy,” Paige smirks, leaning up off of Azzi to take off her shirt in a tantalizingly slow manner, enjoying the way the brunette’s eyes darken as they glide across her abs first and then her breasts, “enjoying the sho- fuck Az.”

The words are stolen from her mouth as Azzi swirls her tongue around one erect nipple, her hands cupping Paige’s ass to balance the blonde on top of her. She’s always known exactly how to get Paige to shut the fuck up. Paige groans as Azzi flips them over, shifting herself to press her thigh in between Paige’s legs and the blonde can’t help but grind up against it, desperate for some much needed friction, as Azzi sucks a possessive bruise against her jaw. 

“Missed this,” Azzi whispers, as she kisses down Paige’s neck, “and this,” a kiss pressed against her collarbone, “and these,” Azzi presses her lips softly to each breast, “and this,” against Paige’s stomach, “and these,” two featherlight kisses are peppered against her hip bones, “and I really missed these.”

“Azzi,” Paige moans as the brunette’s lips glide across the inside of her thighs, taking her sweet time marking only i could ever make you feel like this against every inch of Paige’s skin. 

Azzi stops right above the edge of Paige’s boxers before slowly peeling them off as sparkling brown eyes staring up at her with a myriad of unspoken emotions that Paige could spend a lifetime trying to memorize, “missed all of this. Missed everything about you. Missed you so much baby.”

Vulnerability echoes in Azzi’s voice as she slowly moves herself back up, hands coming to cup Paige’s face as they press their foreheads together. And it’s not like she hadn’t known that Azzi must have missed her in these last couple of years. But there’s a part of Paige that had thought that there was no way Azzi could have missed her as much as she missed Azzi. Because missing Azzi had felt all consuming, like there was a constant noose around her neck that got tighter and tighter with every day that passed by. But there’s something about the way the words reverberate around the room, something about the way Azzi looks like she can finally breathe again after saying it out loud that it hits Paige; it hits her that they’ve both been suffocating without each other. 

“I missed you too,” she breathes out, tears pooling at the edge of her eyes, “missed you so fucking much Azzi.”

“Yeah?” Azzi whispers, lips catching the lone tear that falls from Paige’s eyes, “how much?”

Paige shudders as Azzi’s fingers teasingly ghost over her wet folds, “s-so much. Azzi please. Need it so bad. Need you so bad.”

“Whatever you want baby,” Azzi repeats Paige’s own words back to her before she finally gives her what she’s desperately been craving, two fingers rhythmically pumping in and out of her pussy as her thumb rubs circles against Paige’s clit. 

“Fuck, fuck, just like that-” a litany of curses waterfall from Paige’s lips as she bucks her hips up against Azzi’s hand, “fuck please.”

“Please what?” Azzi asks coyly, fingers moving at a faster face as she hides a grin against Paige’s neck, “gotta tell me what you want baby.”

“W-want your mouth please- please Azzi-baby please,” Paige begs, writhing underneath her when Azzi immediately complies, lips attaching to her clit as she adds another finger, “fuck Azzi- I’m so close.”

“I know baby,” the words vibrate against Paige’s core, sending another bout of ecstasy shooting up her spine as she feels that familiar buildup in her stomach.

“Azz I’m gonna-”

“I know. Let go baby. I’ve got you. I’m gonna catch you I promise,” Azzi whispers. 

And it’s those words, that promise, that sends Paige over the edge, a cry of Azzi’s name falling from her lips. Because she knows Azzi means them for a lot more than just this moment, that those words -the promise- are born out of something deeper than lust. And maybe neither of them are quite ready to acknowledge that yet, not ready to make vows that teeter dangerously close to the ones they watched themselves break in the past, but it lingers between them, like a string made of we’ve always been inevitable connecting their hearts to each other. 

Azzi slowly eases her fingers out of Paige, pressing open-mouthed kisses against the older woman’s stomach as she recovers from her high, before looking up at her with a smirk. Never breaking eye contact, Azzi slips her fingers into her own mouth, leisurely sucking at them as she watches Paige’s face contort with desire. 

“Was I good?” she asks teasingly and Paige growls. 

“How have you gotten better at that? Actually you know what never mind,” Paige shakes her head, “I don’t want to know that.”

Azzi laughs, hiding her face against Paige’s neck, “only that good for you.”

“Good,” Paige tightens her arms around the woman on top of her and then scrunches her face as she feels the material of Azzi’s shirt itch against her wrists, “well this is unfair.”

“What is?” Azzi hum backs. 

“I’m fully fucking naked and you haven’t taken a single thing off,” Paige grumbles as she coaxes Azzi’s face out of her neck, hands gripping the edge of her shit, “take this off.”

Azzi stills, her previous serene expression replaced by something more nervous, as she lifts herself up so she’s straddling the older woman’s hips, “Paige-”

“What’s wrong?” Paige’s senses are on high alert immediately as she rises up herself, maneuvering them so Azzi’s fully on her lap. 

“I just-,” Azzi draws in a deep breath, looking downwards as she chews her lips.

“Hey,” Paige whispers, lifting the younger woman’s chin back up before pressing their foreheads together, “talk to me baby.”

“Can we just-” Azzi plays with the end of Paige’s hair, “can we maybe just-” she cocks her head towards the nightlight on the desk, “do you think we could turn the light off?”

“What?” Paige asks confusedly, “Azzi I’ve seen you naked-”

“Not since- not since I had Stephie,” Azzi interrupts, cowering under Paige’s intense stare, “the lights- the lights were off that one time and the other time I don't think- I don’t think we were sober enough for me to care or for you to remember so can we just-”

“Azzi,” Paige cups the younger woman’s face, “baby there is no amount of alcohol in the world that could make me forget you. Trust me I’ve tried,” she slips her hand under Azzi’s shirt, caressing the skin underneath, “but every time I see you baby, I memorize every little part of you,” she dances her fingertips across where she remembers those stretch marks -the ones Azzi is so afraid of her seeing again- are littered across her stomach, “and whether I’m sober or drunk or something in between, I always think every little bit of you is perfect.”

“Paige,” Azzi says softly, something akin to awe coating her voice. 

“Just wanna make you feel as good as you made me feel baby. Please,” Paige wraps her fingers around the edge of Azzi’s shirt again, “can I?”

“Okay,” Azzi concedes quietly, lifting her arms so Paige can finally tug the offending shirt off. 

Paige gives herself a moment to look at the woman in front of her, the woman whose body she’s seen countless times yet she swears that it feels like a different adventure every time. And then she lets herself have a taste, running her tongue lazily across Azzi’s skin, as she slowly maneuvers them so she can hover above the younger woman. A soft smile flitter across her face as she rubs her fingers over the tattoo printed across Azzi’s ribcage. It’s a purple S tattoo, with butterfly wings fanning out on either side. For Stephie. 

Keeping her eyes trained on the darker-skinned , she brushes her lips across the stretch marks on the darker-skinned woman’s abdomen and she hopes that Azzi can read the all of your imperfections are still made for me that Paige is spelling out against her skin. She uses her teeth to pull down Azzi’s panties, smirking to herself when she hears the younger woman's breath hitch above her. Eyes still interlocked with Azzi’s, Paige is purposefully slow as she licks a stripe up Azzi’s folds, relishing the way the other woman’s eyes roll back into her head. 

“So fucking wet,” she hums, “all for me?”

“You know-” Azzi shudders when Paige’s lips brush against her clit, still teasing, “you know it is.”

Paige smirks, “only for me.”

“Please,” Azzi begs as Paige continues to lazily lap at her pussy, giving her something but not quite enough. 

“Say it,” Paige demands, harshly biting against Azzi’s inner thigh as she brings up a hand to rub infinity signs around Azzi’s clit, “say it’s only for me.”

“It’s only for you-” Azzi cuts herself off with a scream as Paige plunges her tongue deep inside her, setting a tempo she knows will have Azzi seeing stars. 

“Doing so good for me baby,” Paige coos as she adds two fingers with her tongue, “always so good for me.”

“Fuck,” Azzi fists the bedsheets, trying to gain some semblance of control as she writhes under Paige’s touch, “feels so good. Paige please.”

“I know,” Paige whispers, “I know what you need baby.”

And that’s the thing about them. That’s why it’s good every single time. Because Paige knows every little crevice of Azzi’s body like it’s her own, knows exactly where to touch and how to touch to elicit those little gasps of pleasure that she wishes she could record and listen to on loop. And it doesn’t matter how long they go without each other in between, coming back always feels like home. But as much as she loves the feeling of coming back, Paige never wants to feel it again. Because this time, she hopes there is no in between without each other. She hopes that this time, they both stay. 

“Paige,” Azzi moans again, her name falling from her mouth like a prayer. 

“I’ve got you,” Paige whispers, capturing Azzi’s lips with her own as she continues her ministrations with her hand, “fall apart for me baby. I swear I’ll put you back together.”

There’s nothing quite like watching Azzi come undone and Paige drinks in the sight of the other woman quivering as she grabs the blonde’s bicep so tight that it’s bound to leave a victory mark. Paige coaxes her through it, nibbling at Azzi’s jawline as the younger woman slowly climbs down from her peak, going limp in Paige’s arms. 

They’re quiet for a while, languorously pressing delicate kisses against each other's skin, soft hands exploring all over each other’s familiar bodies as they tangle their legs together; close not being close enough. 

“Where do you think you’re going?” Paige whines when Azzi starts to move out of her grasp. 

“I got what I came for,” Azzi teases, “so I’m going back to my own bed.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Paige scowls, pulling the younger woman back into her chest. 

Azzi laughs, kissing away Paige’s pout as she wriggles out of her grip and slips out of the bed, “relax. I’m just getting something to clean us up with.”

“Well hurry up. I’m already cold,” Paige mewls before letting out a wolf-whistle as her eyes drift over Azzi’s naked retreating form, appreciating the tautness of the brunette’s back muscles down to her perfectly curved ass. 

“You’re 31 years old Paige Bueckers,” Azzi chides as she walks into the ensuite bathroom but Paige can hear the blush in her voice. 

“And you’re hot as fuck Azzi Fudd,” Paige calls out with a smirk, keeping the and you’re all mine as a secret in her own thoughts. 

“You’re not bad yourself Bueckers,” Azzi returns from the bathroom with a smile and a damp cloth as she hops back onto the bed, gently dabbing it between Paige’s thighs. 

It’s a simple act but Paige feels tears prickle at the corner of the eyes. Because it signifies so much more than just this moment. For most of her life, Paige had grown accustomed to the idea that no one would take care of her unless she took care of them first. She didn't know it was possible that someone could reach out first, that they could hold her first without any expectation of anything else in return. Until Azzi. 

“Baby?” Azzi’s voice is wrapped in concern as she takes notice of Paige’s tears, immediately rising up to brush them away, “what’s wrong?”

“Nothing I just-” Paige loops her arms around Azzi’s neck, shuddering slightly at how earnest the younger woman’s face is, “I really fucking missed you.”

Azzi’s eyes soften as she caresses Paige’s cheek before pressing her lips against her forehead, “I really fucking missed you too.”

***

Paige’s eyes flutter awake to sunlight peeking through the blue curtains of Azzi’s guest bedroom. She groans, shifting to bury her face further into the brunette’s stomach, pinching it when Azzi laughs above her. Lifting her head slightly, Paige can’t help but smile at the woman above her. Azzi’s got her glasses on, a book in her hands as she peers down at Paige with nothing but pure fondness. Something aches in Paige’s chest as countless visions of mornings just like this fill her head. She’d resigned herself to believing that she’d never get this back again, that she’d have to rely on memories of the past to fill the empty void that rattled hollowly against her chest every time she’d woken up without Azzi by her side. 

“Morning sleepy head,” Azzi says softly, putting her book down to brush her fingers through Paige’s hair, “assuming you slept well considering you didn’t even notice when I left to grab my glasses and a book from my room.”

Paige frowns, “you left me?”

“I was bored,” Azzi defends herself, “you were fast asleep and I had nothing to occupy myself with.”

“I can believe you left me,” Paige petulantly accuses again. 

“I didn’t leave-”

“You left me!”

“Okay fine,” Azzi concedes with an eyeroll, “but I came back.”

“Yeah you did,” a soft smile takes over Paige’s features as she leans up to brush her lips against Azzi’s, “you came back.”

“I did,” Azzi whispers against Paige’s mouth, cupping the older woman’s face with her hands. 

Paige is about to deepen the kiss, her hands beginning to slip lower, when the sound of a doorbell ruins any chances of putting in motion any of the uncordial ideas that had taken birth in her mind. She groans as Azzi immediately pulls away.

“Shit, I didn’t realize they’d be here so early.” the younger woman curses, hurriedly tossing Paige’s discarded clothes at her, “here, put your clothes on. I’ll go down first while you change.”

“I- I can come down?” Paige asks slowly. 

Azzi crinkles her eyes in confusion, “what do you mean? What else would you do?”

“I just. I dunno-” Paige shrugs, “I just assumed you uh- you wouldn’t want Stephie to know I stayed the night. I figured I’d sneak out of the window or something.”

“Paige,” Azzi whispers, walking over to grip the older girl’s hands, “you’re not- you’re not my dirty little secret or anything. I’m not- I’m not quite ready to tell Stephie about us- hell I’m not even really sure what we are yet but I know- I know that I don’t want to hide you from her. Besides,” she nudges Paige humorously, “we’re on the 2nd floor babe. I don’t need you trying to climb out the window and breaking your knee before the season even starts.”

Paige watches quietly as Azzi walks out the door. She doesn’t think the younger woman quite understands how much she had needed to hear those words, how much she had needed to not feel like a secret again. It fills Paige with a sense of hope, hope that maybe things would be different this time. Maybe things would be better this time. 

*** 

“Miss Buecks,” Stephie squeals from Azzi’s arms as she spots Paige descending down the stairs, “you’re already here!”

Paige smiles at the little girl, tapping her nose over Azzi’s shoulder, “I promised you I’d be here bright and early didn’t I?”

“Very bright and early,” Katie cocks an eyebrow as she smirks at Paige and Azzi, “how did you get here so early Paige?”

“Don’t be silly Nanna. She drove of course,” Stephie says matter-of-factly before scrunching up her nose, “but Miss Buecks. How come your car isn’t outside then?”

“That’s a great question Stephie,” Katie says and Paige thinks the woman’s a little bit too peppy for a grandmother, “why isn’t your car outside Paige?”

“Because-” Azzi gives her mother an exasperated look before fixing her eyes on her daughter, “because Paige slept over last night.”

“Miss Buecks slept over last night?” Stephie repeats. 

“I did,” Paige confirms, glaring at Katie as she snickers in the corner. 

“Mama can you please put me down,” Stephie says finally. 

The little girl looks upset and Paige feels her heart constrict with fear. In general, she doesn’t really do well with people being mad at her. But she definitely doesn't think she can take Stephie of all people being mad at her. The little girl has chiseled herself into Paige’s heart and if she ever left, Paige thinks she’d leave a hole so big, her entire heart would cease working. 

Azzi shares a nervous look with Paige as she sets her daughter down before crouching down to Stephie’s level, “what’s wrong Stephie-bean?”

Stephie’s bottom lip trembles as she looks between her mother and Paige, “you let Miss Buecks sleepover.”

“I-” Azzi looks helplessly between her own mother and Paige, both of whom look just as tense, “I did but sweetheart why is that upsetting you? You like Miss Buecks.”

“I love Miss Buecks,” Stephie wails and Paige lets out a sigh of relief, the little girl's words wrapping themselves around her like a warm blanket. 

Azzi blanches for a second, “I don’t understand then what’s the problem-”

 “YOU GUYS HAD A SLEEPOVER WITHOUT ME,” Stephie yells, stomping her tiny feet.  

Oh. 

“Stephie-” Azzi says softly, unable to keep the smile off of her face. 

“I can’t believe you’d do this to me Mama,” Stephie sniffs as she turns to Paige with a betrayed expression, “and you Miss Buecks. How could you guys have a sleepover without me?”

“Oh sweetheart,” Paige falls to her knees beside Azzi, trying not to smile when Stephie dramatically turns her face away from them, “we didn’t mean to. It was just really late when we got back from the party-”

“The party,” Stephie cries out, “first you went to a party without me and then you had a sleepover without me. I can’t bel-ieve you guys would do that to me. Don’t you guys love me at all?”

“We’re really sorry Stephie,” Paige says as seriously as she can, reaching out to fold Stephie’s tiny hands into her much larger one. 

“Very, very, sorry,” Azzi echoes. 

“I don’t know,” Katie supplies unhelpfully from where she’s watching the whole situation with pure amusement, “they don’t seem that sorry Stephie.”

“Mom!” “Katie!”

Katie raises her hands in mock surrender as both Paige and Azzi glare at her, “just looking out for my granddaughter’s best interest.”

“Stephie-bean,” Paige says again, maneuvering the little girl’s body to face her, “your Mama and I are very, very, sorry for having a sleepover without you. Please forgive us.”

Stephie looks at the adults kneeling in front of her with a contemplative expression, “you promise you’ll never do it again?”

“Never,” Azzi promises as Paige nods along.

“And when we go to the park today I can get three scoops of ice cream?” the little girl asks, the hint of a smile starting to breakthrough her lips. 

“I don’t know about that one sweetheart. That’s a lot of ice-”

“Of course you can!”

“Paige!” Azzi hisses. 

“And you’ll push me on the swing at the park for twenty minutes?”

“I’ll even push you for thirty minutes if you want,” Paige says and Azzi rolls her eyes. 

“Just had to one-up it didn’t you Bueckers,” she mutters under her breath. 

“And even though Miss Buecks said she’d get me fries at the park, I can get In-N-Out for dinner too?”

“You’re pushing it Stephie-bean-”

“In-N-Out for dinner sounds perfect,” Paige winks at Stephie as a full smile finally overtakes the little girl’s face. 

“You’re hopeless,” Azzi chides the blonde, throwing her hands up exasperatedly but there’s no denying the grin on her face as she looks back at Stephie, “is that all your highness? Are we finally forgiven or did you want to ask us for more unhealthy things?”

“Just one more thing,” Stephie’s eyes twinkle with mischief, “Miss Buecks has to sleepover tonight too.”

Paige and Azzi share a toothy smile with each other before turning to the little girl. 

“I think that could be arranged.”

The words are barely out of Paige’s mouth before Stephie goes tumbling into her and Azzi, tiny arms somehow wrapping around both of their necks as she pulls them into a group hug. The two adults laugh, cocooning the little girl in between them as she rambles on about how excited she is.  And Paige thinks that when all is said and done, when she looks back on her life, she’ll remember this moment as the one where everything started to finally come together. Right now, with Stephie's arms wrapped around her neck and Azzi’s hands curling around the little girl’s back to intertwine their fingers together, this moment here feels perfect. This moment feels like it belongs to Paige.

[ohtobeleah]

Was It Over? // Jake Seresin

-> Chapter Eight: [Oh, Honeybee]

Summary: Jake can’t accept why you’d keep such a life-threatening situation a secret and you can’t accept why he suddenly seems to care.

Warnings: Sick!reader. Breast cancer diagnosis. Jake Seresin x F!reader. Angst, hospital & medical inaccuracies. SLOW BURN ROMANCE/ Inaccurate medical information. Relationship turmoil.

Word Count: 4K

Author Note: Smaller chapter, but still the same level of pain. Let me know what y’all think about the confrontation of it all.

Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist

“The fuck?” Bradley Bradshaw hated the festive season. He wasn't a Christmas guy. He didn't have an awful lot of family to celebrate with over the consumerist holiday that was shoved down your throat before mid November. He just wasn't the kinda guy who wanted to get involved in the festivities. 

“Who's calling you at ten at night?” Natasha Trace would probably end up regretting her decision to sleep with her co-worker and friend, but the drunken antics she and Rooster had gotten up to earlier in the afternoon ended up with a trip back to his house. 

“Its Hangman–” Bradley answered the naked woman beside him as he sat up in the bed he truly never should have brought her back to. He knew Phoenix would end up regretting her decision to sleep with him. A pity fuck they’d both end up calling it. “Hello?” 

“Are you busy?” Jake asked as he continued to watch you sleep. It had been a few hours since he got to the hospital and about two since he told your mother to go home for some much deserved rest. 

Bradley looked over his shoulder to see Phoenix rolling over, her chest laid flat against the mattress that smelled so much of Bradley. He sighed, peeled the covers up from over his legs and swung them over the side. 

“Nah, what’s up? Everything good?” The pair hadn’t always been on good terms, but ever since Jake had ultimately risked his own life to save Roosters, the two had been able to put their differences aside and let bygones be bygones. 

“I don’t think I’m coming back after Christmas.” Jake started as he let his head lean against the far too uncomfortable hospital chair he’d been sitting in for the better half of four hours. “Somethings’ happened and I dunno what I’m gonna do man.” It was the tone Jake was using that made Bradley frown as he slipped into his sweats. 

“Something happen to one of the kids, man?” Rooster has never heard Jake sound so defeated before. But as he padded down the hall Rooster had to stop in his tracks as Jake explained your current situation. He read the notes right from your chart, from the type of cancer to the stroke you had, how he tried to tuck your hair behind your ear and it fell from your scalp. How he’d tried to win you back, how you’d slept together, how you told him you still loved him yet thought divorce was the best way to go about things. Jake emptied his heart on Bradley sleeve and Bradley didn’t know how to process the pain and anguish Jake was obviously feeling. 

“Are you at the hospital right now? With Y/n?” 

“Yeah—yeah I just sent Maz, Y/n’s mum home to rest and shit.” Jake ran his hand across his face as he watched the IV bag containing your sedative get smaller and smaller. He wasn’t sure how you were going to react when you woke up and saw he was here. “I’ll probably go between here and her house, the kids are at mum's place and I can’t imagine what they’re thinking knowing that we’re both not there.” 

“I could uh—“ Bradley Bradshaw wasn’t a Christmas guy, but he was a family first person. “I could fly out? Maybe get the kids from your mum's house and get them back to Rhode Island? I’m not doing anything this Christmas so I’ve got time.” 

“Bradshaw,” Jake nearly sobbed. “I couldn’t ask you to do that for me.”

“It’s nothing, really, you’re one guy man, stay with your wife, or ex wife? I don’t really wanna get into your business but just text me the details when you can and I’ll organise your kids.” 

“I’ll text you my sister's number.” Jake replied. “She’ll help you out.” There was no real reason to argue, Jake knew that once Rooster had his mind set on something he was gonna do it. 

“No worries, I’m uh—I don’t even know what to say man, I’m so sorry, no one deserves to go through this.” It hit Rooster too close to home, his mother died when he was seventeen from Breast Cancer very similar to yours. It took her quicker than doctors had ever anticipated. 

He just hopes you wouldn’t meet the same untimely fate. 

“Anything man, anything you need, I'm there.” 

***~***~***~***~***~***~***

Time seemed more like an artificial construct as Jake watched Lydia disconnect the line that had been slowly feeding your body with a moderate range sedative. The young nurse looked guilty as she tried to avoid eye contact with the man she had accidentally told private patient information to. 

“She’ll slowly start to wake up over the next hour now that she isn’t slowly taking on the sedative.” Lydia explained. “She might be quite irritable and loopy but I’ll have her surgeon come by for assessment once she’s up.”

“When I was about your age I accidentally hit one of my commanding officers' car while pulling out of the car park at the Naval Base I was stationed at.” Jake mentioned as he let himself curl up in the world's most uncomfortable chair. “Point is we all

make mistakes, don’t beat yourself up about it, but I’d definitely be a little more cautious when reading patients emergency contacts.” 

“You’re wife’s a pretty strong woman Mr. Seresin.” Lydia smiled. “I hope that despite whatever reason she was keeping all this from you, that she’s happy you’re by her side when she wakes up.” Jake chuckled as he slightly readjusted himself and pulled his hood over his head. There were a plethora of ways you could react to his presence running through his mind, he hoped though, that the young nurse who’d accidentally filled him in on your current fight was right. 

“I hope so too kid, I hope so too.”

***~***~***~***~***~***~***

The slow steady rhythm of the many monitors currently tracking your vitals were the first sounds you heard as you slowly but surely woke from what you could only describe as one of the deepest states of complete and utter rest you’d ever experienced. 

Next it was the multi coloured Christmas lights that were hanging around your room. The reds, greens, yellows and blues that reminded you of nineties joy were the first things you noticed in the dimly lit hospital room you knew you were in. 

The third thing you noticed wasn’t a sound or an object, but it was the all too familiar sleeping man curled up in the most awkward position imaginable next to your bedside. Jake, your Jake. Sleeping with his mouth open wide and his arms crossed over his chest. 

“Woah—“ You groggily cooed as you felt the presence of another man checking your vitals beside you. “Whatever the hell kinda drugs you’ve got me on right now Doc has me seeing my ex husband.” You smiled ear to ear as you kept looking at Jake, sleeping, a little bit of drool even tainted his chin as his arms remained crossed and his hood covered his head. “This shits strong as.”

Doctor Ignatii continued reading and recording your vitals the more you came to, he knew, judging by the time you’d finished your dose of intravenous sedative and how cognitive you were, you’d come to realise in about two, maybe three minutes indefinitely that it wasn’t the drugs making you see the mirage of a man at your bedside, but in fact the real deal. 

“Mrs Seresin, can you follow the light for me?” Doctor Ignatii asked with a smile as he clicked on the small but effective flashlight at the end of his pen. He was gentle with the way he handled your head ever so cautiously, holding your eyelids open one by one as you followed the light accordingly. “Can you count to five?” 

“One, two, three, four, five—“ You mumbled out. Jake heard your voice as he stirred next to you and shot up with a gasp that startled you. He looked like a deer caught in headlights as he sat upright and wiped the dry drool from his chin. 

“Welcome back to the land of the living Mr Seresin, I've seen a lot of ways people have tried to sleep in those horrid chairs but I’ve never seen that particular position before.” Doctor Ignatii chuckled to himself as he clicked his pen light off and placed it back in his top pocket. “Alright Y/n, wiggle your toes and touch your nose for me.” All you did was stare at your husband. Why was he here? Who told him? “Mrs Seresin, wiggle your toes for me please.” Doctor Ignatii was a little firmer in his request, he wasn't sure if you were just distracted or if you simply couldn't comply with his request because you couldn't feel your toes.  

But when you finally did wiggle your toes, when you finally brought your index finger up to your nose and when you finally spoke, Doctor Ignatii knew that in the next hour or so when he got you up and walking, that you were going to be just fine.  

“What are you doing here?” Your voice was rather horse from the sedative but you were able to ask Jake that all too powerful question that sliced his skin clean open like one of the sharpest knives never could. Doctor Ignatii knew that he had to give you some space when he was finished assessing your ability to wiggle your toes he cleared his throat. “What the hell are you doing here?” 

“I'll give you two a moment alone, but Lydia will be in shortly.” He explained before making his way out of your hospital room. The silence was deafening as Jake cleared his throat and looked anywhere but in your eyes to begin with. 

“Jake–” You immediately asked again as you tried to sit up a little straighter. “What are you doing here?” Jake ignored your initial question and instead pressed his tongue into the middle of his cheek. His blood was boiling, he was so full of rage that you hadn’t told him you were sick that he couldn't think straight now that he knew you were awake and talking. You were supposed to be the mother of his children if at the very least. He felt like you had an obligation to disclose medical diagnoses that could alter the course of your children's lives. Right? 

“You have cancer and you didn't tell me?” Jake frowned as he spoke through a tired growl. “You have cancer and you didn’t think to mention it at all, not even a downplayed version of the truth? You just–” Jakes reaction wasn't something that surprised you, but his anger did. That anger was something you hadn’t seen in a long time, anger born from love and compassion. An anger so pure it rivalled empathy itself just in a different font. “You just negated the entire thing? Jesus Christ Y/n! You have–” 

“Stage three A, triple positive grade three invasive doctoral carcinoma.” You interrupted Jake as tears welled in your eyes. “I know, I found out back in November, I hadn’t been feeling all that well since around March.” You kicked yourself everyday for not getting yourself to a doctor sooner, but with your separation, work, the kids, you just decided to self diagnose yourself as an overworked mum who had little to no time for herself. Finding the time to see a doctor was nearly impossible, it was only when you found that lump in the shower you panicked. “Jake I–” 

“You–” Jake clenched his jaw as tight as he could, you swore he could have chipped his bottom teeth he was clenching that hard trying to control his frustration. “You don’t get to fucking do this to me do you understand?” 

“Excuse me?” You questioned as Jake stood up from the chair he’d been cramped in for the better half of the last twelve hours. “I didn’t choose to do this willingly Jake are you fucking kidding me?” It may have come out more aggressive than Jake had intended it to, but his heart hurt so much he swore he was having a heart attack the more he looked at you in the hospital bed connected to machines and wires that told him what your heart was doing and what your blood pressure was. “I didn't choose to get fucking cancer!” 

“No, no you didn’t Y/n but you chose not to tell me about it.” Jake sighed. “Am I really that bad of a person that you can't tell the father of your fuckings kids that you might be dying? Stage three!? I'd understand if you had a scare and didn’t mention it or a bad rash but stage three?” Jake spat as he walked around your hospital room like he was looking for a way out of this whole mess. “That’s closer to a death sentence than it is to a malignant mass!” 

All you could do was listen, you couldn't run this time. You had to face the man who broke your heart more ways than one as he raised his voice and walked around your hospital room with his hands on his hips. 

“You, you had a stroke too.” Jake's voice softened as did his eyes, the realisation had hit as the immediate love filled anger that clouded his judgement faded. The misguided anger that he might truly be losing the love of his life had begun to wash away as the sadness crept in. 

“Yeah–” You didn't hold it against Jake, you'd had more time to process this than he did. “Apparently the chemotherapy was just causing havoc to my nervous system and caused a clot that travelled from my leg to my brain.” You said it with a shrug, like it was no big deal. Jake's eyes widened at the idea of something that was meant to help you had done so much damage. “I was given a pamphlet, strokes were a side effect, but I just didn’t think it would happen to me you know.” 

“Honeybee–” Jake cooed as he came back over to your bedside. “I–” There was a distinct tentative pause in the way his hand automatically went to slip into yous, but even though Jake second guessed his own judgement there for a split second, he still placed his hand in yours and reveled in the way you squeezed him back. “I can't understand why you wouldn't tell me about this.” Jake had tried to understand, truly he did. He thought about it alot on the plane–all the ways in which he’d ever let you down. He understood he was a shitty husband, or had been, but this was life or death. 

Jake almost wished he never asked why and had instead just silently accepted the fact you decided not to loop him in on what was probably your biggest health complication since Samuel was born. He almost wished he hadn’t asked because the way you looked right into his eyes as your bottom lip quivered and your eyes watered with such a heartbreaking cry of anguish that ripped through your chest, Jake wished he hadnt fucking asked. 

“I didn't tell you because I just didn't think you’d care.” You cried violently as Jake helped you sit up. “I didnt–I just didnt think youd, you'd care about me.” Your cries were muffled into Jake's shoulder as he held you, he wanted to climb right into the hospital bed with you, but he couldn't. So Jake compromised and leaned over just enough to wrap you in his arms and rub small circles into your back as you buried your face in his chest and shoulder. “I didn't think you’d fucking care–because you haven’t cared about me in years!”

“I have never stopped caring about you.” Jake cried too, he couldn't hold it in any longer. “I have never and I will never stop caring about you Honey.” It was a hard statement to believe especially with what the past four years had been. “I promised you in sickness and in health, I'm here, I've got you.” Jake cooed as he tried to soothe you, your cries of pure anguish for your own situation made him want to die. What more could he possibly do to ease this burden from you, what could he possibly do to take the pain away. “I'm here, I'm right here.” 

“You don’t have to pretend.” You tried to calm yourself down as much as you could. “Please Jake you don’t have to pretend to care about me anymore, I’m not yours.” 

“No you’re not—“ Jake nodded in agreement as he pulled away to wipe your tears, you looked like hell but he wasn’t about to tell you that. To Jake you were still the most beautiful woman in the entire world, the only woman he ever needed, wanted. “But I’m still yours alright, you have me and I’m not pretending.” Jake wiped the pads of his thumbs across your cheeks, he tried not to tug at the oxygen tube feeding into your nose. “I’ve got you yeah? You don’t have to do this alone.” 

“I never wanted to do any of it alone.” You sobbed again, it was all too much. Jake knew what you meant by all, you never expected your marriage to fall apart. Neither did he. “I can’t do any of this, I’m so fucking scared.” If someone had asked Jake three years ago if his marriage would fall apart around him, he would have stood up and punched whoever had said such blasphemy in the mouth. But here he was. 

“You’re okay.” Jake tried his best to console you, he did know what else he could do in the moment beside to hold you. The kiss he left atop your forehead was so pure and full of love you swore it sent an electric shock through your body, the same kind of electricity you felt when you slept with Jake the night before you said goodbye to your kids. “I'm not leaving your side alright, “I’m here, I've got you, I can't lose you this way– I wont.” 

Jake knew this love was a burden that you both shared. The both of you were just two sinners who can't atone from a lone prayer. Two souls tied, intertwined by pride and guilt. 

***~***~***~***~***~***~***

Jake was true to his word, he didn't leave your side for the rest of the day. He stayed right by your side hand in hand, just sitting there, talking, not talking, sleeping. All that mattered was that he was there. 

“What do you mean Bradley Bradshaw offered to get the kids from your mum's house?” You thought for a split second that perhaps you hadnt woken up. Or maybe you'd actually woken up in some parallel universe where your husband never forgot how to love you and he didn't have a disdain for the man who gave him his Call Sign out of rage. “Bradley Bradshaw? As in Rooster?” 

Jake couldn't help but to smile, there was so much he had to fill you in on, the two of you hadnt really sat down and spoken uninterrupted without the kids since January. Sure there were family functions and times where you and Jake had to coexist and coparents. But he never really saw a reason to tell you all about his time in North Island. You were with him when he was called to Togun the first time, there wasn't any need to really rub your nose in the fact he was called back again. After all, a part of the reason you left was because Jake prioritised his work life over his home life, more specifically, you. 

“Would you believe me if I told you I saved his life?” Jake couldn't erase the grin that grew ear to ear from his face as he watched your eyes light up with shock and excitement. He missed this, the gentle moments. 

“You did not–” In all the time you had known Jake while he was a loyalist to the United States Navy, he had never once put a toe out of line. Never pushed back, never rocked the boat. He had a goal and that goal was to reach the top. You couldn't do that while drawing unwanted attention to yourself. 

“I did,” He chuckled through that very grin that you swore was permanently pinned to his cheeks. “Even went against orders to do it.” The look of pure shock on your face told Jake all he needed to know, you didn't believe what he was telling you. 

“Who are you and what have you done with Jake Seresin?” You chuckled softly as Jake ran his thumb across your hand. “You? Going against the brace? Unheard of.” A lot of what made Jake, well, Jake–was that he loved his job. 

“Trust me Honey I never thought I'd see the damn day either.” Jake sighed, he still couldn't believe how much his time in North Island had changed him. How it broadened his perspective on all the things that made him simply him. “But he was stuck in a pretty tight spot, so was Mav, our Captain.” 

“Well–” You smiled as you readjusted yourself in your bed. Unbeknownst to both you and Jake, Lydia was watching just out of frame from her spot at the nurses station. She couldn't help but to notice the loving, all encompassing look the two of you shared. Perhaps her small mistake that usually would have been a carrier ending HIPAA violation wasn't so bad after all. “Look at The Hangman go huh, who says he's always leaving people out to dry.” 

“Oh I could still name a few–” It was organic the way you and Jake fell into a rhythm with one another when the pair of you allowed each other to do so. “But yeah, he's gonna fly in, get the kids for us because I really don't want them there for too long without at least one of us there and bring them back to your mums for us.” 

“Is she alright with that?” As always Jake knew you would think about everyone but yourself when the only person you should have been thinking about right now was you. “What if she–” Jake cut you off with a simple shake of his head.  

“I already organised it.” Jake explained softly, his thumb never stopped stroking your hand as he held it. “Your mums gonna take the kids while we figure all this out, I don't want them with mine.” It wasn't that Jake didn't love his Ma, he did. But the idea of her having the kids for an extended amount of time gave him stomach issues he couldn't handle. “I saved his life, I trust him to escort our three terrors back here.” 

“Have you met our kids? You asked with an all knowing look that Jake caught right away. Maybe Rooster wasn't the best person to call on, he had zero experience with kids, let alone Jake's twins and two year old. 

Jake knew that you knew there was a darkness in the distance, but in the moment while everything felt normal, you both laughed together knowing exactly how the flight with your kids would go for Bradley Bradshaw. 

“You’re totally right–” Jake cooed. “He might need to bring his flight helmet as a safety precaution.”

***~***~***~***~***~***~

Tags: @blindedbythelightt @starset21 @tayl0rhuynh @mamachasesmayhem @marvelogic @itsmytimetoodream @maverick-wingman @kodzukenmaaa @eternalsams @seitmai @nota-professional @jessicab1991 @hardballoonlove @senawashere @lafrone @fanficfandomlove @withahappyrefrain @dizzybee03 @maisie-rebloging-blog @goldenseresinretriever @a-reader-and-a-writer @sunlightmurdock @shelbycillian @memoriesat30 @accioprocrastination @the-aspiring-fanfic-writer @athenabarnes @eternallyvenus @emma8895eb

[luci1fer]

Miles with earthy reader in her room

contains: mostly sfw, making out, hand holding, neck grabbing/kissing, cursing, grinding, reader lights incense, intense rounds of board/video games, miles being mesmerized by you, reader has braids with beads

it was a summer Sunday night. Miles parents allowed Miles to stay with you for a couple of days under the supervision of your parents.Even though they said they’d watch you two, they were having their date night, leaving y’all alone. Moonlight was filling up your room and even your face. A couple candles were lit and “When I’m in Your Arms” by Cleo Sol was playing in the background.

“Are you gonna ride with me.” “Hold me down, will you listen, never lie to me.”

Miles couldn’t help but stare at you as he was partaking in a passionate game of Candy Land. You guys had been switching from board game to board game, you would win some, he would win some.This was the last round before you would turn on your PlayStation. While he was obviously trying to win, would occasionally get distracted by your glowing skin.

“If only she realized how enchanting she was”, he would think to himself. His eyes would travel to your body, that beautiful figure that he loved to hold when you two cuddle or just in general. He loved every single outfit that you wore, especially those long, flowy skirts with those marvelous designs that he’s never seen. He praised you for those waist beads you would wear that complimented your complexion…he would never touch them out of respect. You were currently wearing a crop top and shorts that had his eyes wandering.His lip caught between his teeth as he looked at your lips, those full lips that he loved to kiss.

He would mutter a “damn” under his breath as he finally looked at you as a whole. “God, I’m so lucky to have her”, he thought.It wasn’t until you clapped your hands in front of him that he snapped out of it.

“Miles, it’s your turn cariño”, you spoke. He would stare at the game before realizing that you were only a couple spaces from winning.

“Looks like you’re winning mi reina”, he said in a playfully defeated tone. “I wanna play COD”, you said as you turned your console on. Miles would sit in you gaming chair, and you would sit in his lap as the game was starting.

“Y/N…I’m down”, Miles would say to you. You were shooting multiple zombies at a time, trying to make it over to Miles who was slowly running out of time.Eventually, you would make it over and heal his character before one of the hardest rounds came.

“Miles, I know you suck at video games but YOU HAVE A RUN BUTTON FOR A REASON”, you would say…slightly raising your voice. Miles loved when you got so passionate about beating a game. He was surprised you let him help you find a video game Easter egg because even the gods above couldn’t help his ability in playing video games. An hour would pass and your parents still weren’t here, you and Miles had gotten multiple Easter eggs, and your fingers began to grow sore. As soon as you finished getting another Easter egg, you would turn the game, you console, and the controllers off. You grabbed your phone and started shuffling through multiple songs until you picked “Kiss of Life” by Sade.

“There must’ve been an Angel by my side.” “Something heavenly lead me to you”

You would put your braids into a ponytail, making sure not to accidentally rip some beads off the ends. You went through your different scents of incense, occasionally smelling to see which one you were feeling. You decided on Vanilla and lit it, sitting it on the holder. You made your way to Miles, who was sitting on the couch drawing in his sketchbook. He was doing a little sketch of you, but was interrupted by you sitting on his lap. You put one hand on your shoulder and the other in his scalp

As you begin to massage, he would relax in your arms and put his arms around you lower back, pulling you closer to him. He would move from your back to your thighs and rub alongside those, occasionally squeezing. “You’ve been a little quiet today”, you said. “Talk to me, Miles”. Miles would wrap his arms around you and pull you into a tight hug before pulling away.

“I’m just so glad that I get to be with you for a couple days”, he admits. “I love you so much and I haven’t seen you for real since school let out”. You smile and say “I love you too, Miles”. He would smile as well as he pulled you into a soft kiss.

“Cant you see what I’m trying to say.” “I’m nothing without you.”

As “Nothing Without You” by Tenerélle was playing in the background, you and Miles had slowly began to makeout with each other. You had grabbed the back of his neck to deepen the kiss and he had squeezed you thighs a little harder. You swirled your tongue around his bottom lip and he pushed his tongue deeper into your mouth. His hands left your thighs and ran them up and down your body

One hand then moved to your ass and the other to your neck, lightly squeezing both. You began to grind against him, making him let out a quiet gasp. His hand that was on your neck moved to your hand as your fingers locked with his .You began to grind to the rhythm of “Woman” by Little Simz.

While he was aroused, he was enjoying the way you were moving your hips. You were getting aroused yourself as you began to lock lips with him again. Shortly after, he started to place kisses on your neck, even licking and sucking on that sweet spot you love so much. You release light moans into his ear, those beautiful moans that he loves so much.You could feel him under you, that’s when you pulled away and caught your breath. Your shirt had lifted and so had his, and you two would laugh as you looked at his pants.

“Need help with that?”

[sleepyspudbrainrot]

Patience (Cody x OC x Jey)

Cody Rhodes x OC x Jey Uso | 18+, fluff, drug use | 1591 words

Had inspiration to write a bit of Cody Rhodes and Jey Uso fluff based on a prompt my friend had picked out for me ages ago. Hope y'all enjoy this little one shot !

“Everything looks so beautiful from up here…”

Calista sat on the edge of the rooftop, legs dangling into the open air below.  Normally, she was not one for heights, however the need to get away from the crowded rooms beneath had overridden her fears.  She let herself focus on the horizon, the buildings that pierced the sky, the lights that shone from in between.  It was quiet, peaceful, and she was completely alone with her thoughts.  Which were much harder to get away from. She sighed softly, leaning back, hands scraping on the textured cement of the roof behind her.  Her gaze trailed up and up, following the lines of the buildings around her until all she could see was the starry sky.  Each star lead her to another.  Each star a smaller piece of a larger constellation.  She’d only seen two that she could name, the big dipper and orion’s belt.  However, she was certain there were more to find than that.

“Is this seat taken?”

A rough, male voice broke through the dull hum of the streets beneath them.  A voice that she didn’t quite recognize without a face.  “Depends on who you are?”  The only response she got from the unknown male behind her was a low chuckle, before he entered the periphery of her vision.  Shocking blonde hair, the garish tattoo on the side of his neck.  This unknown male was none other than Cody Rhodes. “How on earth did you sneak out of all of that?”  She turned her head, an eyebrow raised.  The party down below was for the man sitting to her left.  He’d just won tag team gold with Jey Uso and had every reason to celebrate.  And very few reason’s to hide away on the roof.

“Told them I was going for a smoke… or was it that I was looking for a bathroom… either way, I don’t think they’ll think too much of it?”

Calista smiled, shaking her head.  “You’re one half of the main reason they’re celebrating… also is it really a good idea to leave Jey down there? He was…” 

Cody interrupted her with a chuckle, “Already pretty far gone when we got here?” She nodded, turning to look at Cody as he spoke.  “He was flirting with one of your friends I think… they’d been asking if he’d seen her and he was quick to distract.  Almost like…”

“He knew that I’d needed some air?”  

It was Cody’s turn to nod in agreement.  “I might’ve passed him on the way out and let him know.  He knows how I feel about crowds.” She shrugged, turning to look at the horizon once more.  The buzz from beneath them had faded to a dull vibration that she could only really hear if she was listening for it.  And even then, noise from the party had a tendency to drown anything else out as it filtered upwards from the floors below.  “I don’t want you to miss out on the celebrations for me.”

Cody raised an eyebrow, shifting on the ledge, hip brushing against her own as he did so.  “You’re the one who suggested we team up… if anyone should be celebrating with us, it’s you.”  Her expression softened, cheeks glowing in the faint light of the moon.  “Am I wrong?”

She shrugged, “You would’ve won regardless.  Creative has been loving you lately.  Whether you’d been paired with Jey or Kevin or… hell even if they’d dragged me out as a “special guest”, not that they would…” The idea is ludicrous, given that she has zero experience in the ring.  She’s more of a glorified consultant for creative these days more than anything else.  “Your win was practically guaranteed.  Having Jey as your partner is just an added bonus.  Which…” She glances over her shoulder, almost wonder if Jey is listening behind the door.  “I really hope he’s not listening to this but… it’s a good look for you both.  Makes the crowds love y’all even more.”

She had to force herself not to look at Cody for a reaction, to not overthink the expression of appreciation and the hint of surprise that seemed to settle over him.  Silence claimed the space between them, punctuated with little more than the occasional cheer from the party beneath them or an occasional car horn that managed to make it’s way all the way up to them.  She could’ve spent all night like this.  In a comfortable silent understanding with the man beside her.  At some point, he’d reached behind her, hand curling around her shoulder to pull her close.  The gesture alone was enough to flood her cheeks with color that she could only pray that he didn’t see.

“Hope that’s alright…” Cody looked down at her, his freehand coming up to brush the hair from her face.  “You looked… a little cold?”  A flimsy excuse, that both of them could see right through.  However, while the gesture was unexpected, she couldn’t say that she wasn’t enjoying the closeness. 

“Jey told you to come find me didn’t he…”

The thought had been tugging at the back of her mind since he’d sat beside her.  The knowledge that Jey knew of her admiration for the “American Nightmare” that she’d been content to keep to herself.  At least, until he’d noticed it.  He’d been teasing her for weeks, so it made sense that he’d finally decided to give them both the push that he felt she needed.  

“He did, said something about making sure that girl doesn’t freeze to death, you feel me dawg.”

A loud thud from the rooftop door punctuated his statement as Jey Uso himself stumbled out from the stairwell.  “Come on Uces! You’re missing out on - -”  It was as if the closeness of the pair in front of him hadn’t registered, until it did.  “Ah shit dawg, why didn’t you tell me you found her.  I’m interrupting and everything…”  A laugh escaped Calista, her free hand flying up to cover her mouth as her shoulders shook against Cody’s chest.

“What’s so funny Uces? We’re here to celebrate our man over here and he’s wrapped up in you… You havin’ your own private celebration? Without me?”  It was as if the idea was so outlandish, Jey’s gaze flicking between the pair.  “Alright, make some room you two.  Can’t let y’all have all the fun… plus I grabbed some party favors!” He settled on the edge of the roof to Calista’s right, effectively wedging her between them both.  The party favor’s in question were fished from his pockets, two joints and a flask of some unidentified liquor.

“I’ll pass on the flask but… pass one of those over here?”

The joints were passed to Calista first, allowing her to light one and take the first satisfying hit.  The smoke filled her lungs with a comfortable burn that had her eyes fluttering closed.  She then blew it out into the night, letting the tendrils float away on a breeze.  The joint was passed to Cody now, leaving Calista to lean on Jey.  Jey who’d thrown an arm around her waist to compliment the arm around her shoulder from Cody.  

“I swear, you two…” She rested her head on Jey’s shoulder now.  “You’ve been planning this.  Getting me alone… keeping me all to yourselves…”

“Ain’t nothin’ wrong with that ma.” 

Calista glanced up at Jey who was grinning down at her.  His grill glinting in the moonlight, as his gaze settled on hers.  “Not our fault you’ve been ignorin’ the signs for the last month.”  

She blinked at Jey, her gaze flitting between him and Cody as she sat up straight.  “Signs…?” 

It was Cody’s turn to grin at her now, smoke seeping from in between his teeth. “The compliments, the flirting, creative calling you in to work specifically with the two of us?”

“But I thought…?”  If she was being honest with herself, she wasn’t sure what she thought.  She’d just thought her input was needed, given how close she was to the storylines, to Jey.  She’d begun to get close to Cody over the last week or so, but she’d thought that was normal.  There was a certain level of trust and closeness expected when you were choreographing matches and spending late nights tweaking the individual pieces to make sure everything flowed the way it needed to.

“Told you Uce, I knew she wasn’t pickin’ up what we were puttin’ down.”

Cody shook his head, “Hate to admit man… guess we’re doing a shit job of showing her how we’ve been feeling.” 

Once again Calista was speechless, blinking as she glanced at the men on either side of her.  “I’m.. sorry? What have I --”

Cody leaned forward, grabbing her left hand and threading their fingers together.  Jey was doing the same with her right hand.  Both hands were calloused and held strength that she could feel despite the tender gesture. The gesture was enough to put together the puzzle pieces they’d been dropping for her.  They had been flirting with her.  Had been complimenting her.  They’d asked her out to dinner and she’d invited others to join them thinking that they were friend dinners.  The gears in her mind were moving, working and finally she got it.

“How on earth have you been this patient for so long…”

Both men laughed, their amusement shaking their shoulders, even as they held Calista close. “Because there’s a certain amount of patience involved for things that are worth it… isn’t that something you’ve always said?” 

[asexualasshat]

Y’all remember the tiktok trend where grown ups realized that they’d forgotten how to skip. Headcannon that one, a few years after Derry part 2, Richie is being a silly sappy little fellow. Starts skipping while he and Eddie are a park or whatever. He grabs Eddie’s hand to bring him along for the ride. And Eddie??? Understands the hypothetical concept of skipping. And yet his feet? Doing a sort of botched gallop.

And Richie LOSES IT! Starts roasting him. And Eddie is freaking tf out. He’s yelling but also still trying to figure skipping out. You can’t really tell if he’s yelling more at Richie or at himself. And he’s still galloping away. Richie is on the ground, holding his face in his hands to muffle his laughter.

Eventually, Richie gets up and he starts coaching Eddie. Twenty minutes later, they’re hand in hand, skipping down the path.

Richie didn’t have a choice but to tell the losers everything. And the groupchat?? LOSES IT! At first? Just roasts tf out of Eddie at first. Ben comes to his defence pretty quickly. And then asks “when was the last time you guys skipped? Are you sure you remember?”

And the accusations fly right back at Ben. Asking him if he can skip. And Ben??? In his office wearing his fancy designer work clothes???? Takes a video of himself skipping. And he sure can skip! When he’s done showing off he comes close to the camera and says “we just had a daughter. I’ve prepared.”

And again, they’re going wild. Within minutes, videos start pouring in. Bev is first, obviously immediately ready to support her husband. She’s a dazzling skipper. She’d win first prize in a skipping competition. The technique is impeccable.

Stan is next. He gets Patty into it as well, to know one’s surprise. Neither is perfect. Patty’s footwork isn’t perfect but she has pizazz. Stan is pure technique, to the point that it’s awkwardly stiff. But the pair are smiling and skipping so it doesn’t even matter. Their own daughter just toddles around in the background. Kind of embarrassing for her, but she doesn’t know what embarrassment is yet.

Mike is out in a field, phone probably propped up on his water bottle or a log. He’s mostly just frolicking around, but there’s a few solid skips in there. It’s gloriously cinematic.

Audra is on camera next, and bill can be heard saying “show me! I want to see.” She hangs in the air longer than any mortal should be able to. Her flowy dress flounces out. She giggles in response to bill saying “wow!” and “you’re really good!”

But then hepassed the phone to Audra. Of course they don’t think to stop filming in between, so you hear all the shuffling. Audra says “okay, show me!” And Bill?? The bitch can’t get his feet off the ground. There’s no elevation at all. Audra is losing her mind. She’s scream laughing. Bill looks devastated.

A moment after his own roasting begins, bill texts back “so does this mean I’m a bad dad?” And immediately it turns to dad comfort. Ben’s “kids don’t usually start to try skipping until they’re four. You have two years to practice!” And Stan’s “your son is going to see you learn and grow as a man. You’re setting a great example.” Its really quite wholesome.

Obviously someone filmed it in the park. The world sees the graceful pursuit of Eddie learning to skip. Twitter obviously loves it because it so so silly and sweet. Richie tweets something stupid like (and funnier than) “bet your husband can’t skip, either.”

And Bev, because she has notifications on for Richie, immediately replies with Ben’s video and saying “my husband could beat your husband”

More videos start pouring in. Stan keeps their video as a groupchat exclusive, but tweets from his rarely active account “Richie I literally taught you how to skip when you were 6.” Richie responds calling him a bitch.

Bill posts their video saying “watch me realize I can’t skip.”

And later. Hours later. Many. Hours. Later. Audra posts a video to her insta story. She has taught Bill how to skip. Is it graceful? No. Does it have technique? No. Could you call it good? No. But goddamn he skipped.

Eddie holds it over him for weeks that he’s the better beginner skipper

[shadowqueenjude]

Ok Emerie and Nuan: how would they meet?

(also y’all tell me if I should continue this)

Emerie had a wild smile on her face as she cut through the crowd of Illyrians. With Nesta’s death powers on their side and the newly formed Valkyrie group, the shocked Illyrian warriors stood no chance. After some killings, the men began to surrender; they knew they were overpowered. They allowed Emerie to take the women, and it was not long before they’d all been rounded up. Emerie gently sent a teenage girl into the crowd before walking to the front to high-five Gwyn and Nesta. “Another fabulous win, girls. These Valkyries are good enough to revive the legend.” Nesta, Gwyn, and Emerie shared conspiratorial grins.

“Where will you be taking this lot?” Nesta asked Emerie, popping one of her homemade samosas into her mouth. “The House of Wind sanctuary is nearly full.”

Emerie shook her head. “No…this group was pretty bad. I think it’s time we take these ladies where they really need to go: the center of healing.”

“Dawn Court?” Nesta asked. “But who will take you there?”

Emerie shrugged. “I’ll figure something out. In the meantime, you two need to keep my shop running.” They nodded. “Half the girls can go sleep in the library for the night. The other half is coming with me.”

As Nesta and Gwyn heralded half of the group to the House of Wind, Emerie guided the other half to her own shop. She allowed the women inside, loosening a tile on the floorboard. Underneath it was a ladder that led into a small bunker. Emerie had had it constructed herself in the off chance that she had to do something such as this. She just hadn’t imagined being able to save this many at once.

“If you can’t descend the ladder on your own, tell me,” she said as the ladies formed a line, descending into the bunker one by one. Most were able to get down safely, albeit shakily. A couple of them, Emerie had to carry down the ladder. She was amazed at how strong she had gotten in the past few months. She would’ve been her father’s dream child-if she was a male, that is.

Emerie closed her eyes, thought of her rage towards her father, then let it go like dust on the wind. She tried to give each person a warm blanket from her clothing store, but it was difficult. Emerie technically had a double salary now: one from her business, and one from being a Valkyrie. As a result, she had no problem giving away these clothes for free. They were more important than this business, anyhow.

“Sleep tight, ladies,” Emerie said. “We’ve got a long day tomorrow.”

Emerie was no healer, but she tried her best to keep the women with severe injuries from getting any worse. Hopefully the Dawn Court would have better things to offer. When she figured out how to get there, at least.

The next day, Emerie tamped down her nerves, finding her best dress to appear before the High Lord of the Night Court. She didn’t trust the male by a long shot; she knew there was bad blood between him and Nesta, and Emerie had a feeling that there was a lot more that Nesta wasn’t telling her and Gwyn. But there was no one else to go to.

Emerie hadn’t worn this dress before because it was once her mother’s, plus it was a little more revealing than she preferred. But seeing how Rhysand’s right hand woman Mor dressed, Emerie suspected that he would appreciate this style of dressing.

The walk from her shop to the residence of Rhysand wasn’t long, especially with her new Valkyrie training. She hardly broke a sweat walking up to the entrance. The guards hardly spared her a glance before letting her in. Emerie swept by them, ignoring the way her stilettos pinched her heels and toes.

She found the Morrigan lounging on a couch nearby, her head in some papers. Emerie looked away. She had a major, frankly embarrassing crush on the woman. It was ridiculous, really; Emerie hadn’t had many female idols to look up to as a child, so the legendary Morrigan who had escaped the Hewn City to become one of the greatest warriors, who was so old she was practically a goddess, had been her idol. Training with her while becoming a Valkyrie had brought to her attention how beautiful she was too. But everything she had learned about her from Nesta made her want to punch her in the face. She wished she could erase her attraction to her too.

“I need to speak with the High Lord,” Emerie said, projecting her voice with authority. Morrigan looked up at her. Emerie willed herself not to react to her big brown eyes staring at her. “He is busy,” Morrigan said dismissively. Bitch. “Come back another day.”

“No,” Emerie snapped, glaring down at her. “This is an emergency.”

Morrigan still demonstrated little sign of urgency aside from placing her papers to the side. “For whom?”

“A group of Illyrian women, if you care,” Emerie snapped. Probably not, since you’ve been sitting on your ass all this time; those thoughts, however, remained unspoken. Morrigan stood up, her papers forgotten. She was in a tight red dress with cuts between her breasts, up the sides of her legs, and around her hips. Did she just dress like that on a regular basis?

“I’ll get you an audience,” she said, striding away. Emerie hurried after her. Emerie found Morrigan knocking on a door with an antique finish that reminded Emerie uncomfortably of her own father’s office door.

After several minutes, the High Lord of Night opened the door, irritation stark in his violet eyes. Emerie refused to be intimidated; this was his job she was doing: protecting his people.

“I need help transporting around thirty women to the Dawn Court,” Emerie said before Rhysand could interrupt. His eyes narrowed. “Why?”

Emerie suppressed the answer she wanted to give: Why do you think? Instead with forced calm, she answered, “These are Illyrian women who have been abused by the males in their family. Some are hurt-badly. I need to get them out, and the current sanctuary is nearly full.”

Rhysand nodded. “I’ll arrange for that. Wait on top of the House of Wind.” Emerie held in her sigh of relief until she was far away from Rhysand and Morrigan.

While Emerie waited at the top of the House of Wind with the girls, she saw a small group of people with wings coming. Emerie saw red when she realized that one of them was the high lady herself. How dare she, a child not of Night, take their wings as her own while refusing to help the people who lose them every day…

The entire Inner Circle aside from Nesta’s mate was there along with two strange shadowy-looking things that looked similar to Azriel.

“Are the women ready?” Rhysand asked. Emerie nodded. Then they began winnowing the ladies away, or in the shadowsingers and other shadow-like creatures (what were they called again? wraths? that didn’t sound right), melting into darkness. Rhysand himself winnowed her.

When she arrived at the Dawn Court, Emerie was stunned into silence. The soft orange glow of the sky was so peaceful, and even from this distance the buildings looked majestic. The crowd had gathered there, and Emerie pushed herself to the front of the line to speak to border patrol.

“Hello,” she said. Best to be brief and pull rank. “I am Emerie. Carynthian and Valkyrie. Some of these girls are badly injured, and our High Lord requests that you allow these ladies to be healed by the greatest healers Prythian has to offer.”

The guards raised a brow at her qualifications, but they nodded. “You may go in,” the leader said. Emerie gestured to the Illyrians, and for the first time, they entered another court of Prythian.

[oddeyevibes]

The Rock w/ A Goth S/O

(Like usual, this is kayfabe compliant. Also, this has elements of my fic idea basically but I’m still workshopping stuff so I decided to do headcanons cause why not)

You debuted just before the WWF fully embraced their attitude and aspects of goth sub-culture bled into the federation. So that made you kind of an oddball but, obviously, you embraced it.

So it was an odd pairing between you and “Rocky Maivia”. This rookie femme fatale and this fresh-faced third gen up-and-comer looking to make a name for himself.

I would say, maybe in the beginning you two would keep your relationship under wraps, with the both of you coming off as either friends or twos newbies simply looking out for each other.

The other wrestlers that were heel aligned wasted no time in giving Rock dirty looks cause of how close he was getting to you.

You would support and help him train as he wanted to be some Hulk Hogan-esque hero to the fans but it wasn’t working.

At first, he was in that stage of denial and wanting passive advice. The “it’ll get better” type deals because he felt if he kept trying, he could win them over. He was even given those talks by the other faces backstage.

As someone who was more “heel aligned”, you thought that was horse shit but you supported what he initially wanted.

It wasn’t until the “Die Rocky Die” chants and signs that you put your foot down.

“Tell them to go fuck themselves” you would say and he would ignore it. Trying to talk YOU down from going out there and cursing people out.

“I just have to run my own race and I’ll win them over.” He was so naive. The poor baby.

But you were determined. Becoming the little devil on his shoulder while the other baby faces kept trying to urge him to stay on the “right” path. The path of “perseverance”.

“Who cares what the fans think?”

“They don’t even know what they want. They’d rather cheer on dinosaurs than new blood”

“Stop lying down and waiting for them to respect you. TAKE their respect.”

At first, he would laugh at your persistence. “Girl, you are a bad influence on me.”

But then it started getting to him more and more, and with the Nation of Domination now urging him, he finally took matters into his own hands.

After the crowd watched him raise his fist alongside Farooq, it was no holds barred.

Now instead of being some fresh faced Romeo + Juliet type fling, you two went full on power couple.

Subtext became straight up text.

I said it before in my other headcanon but it bears repeating, with your styles, the both of you would end up matching CONSTANTLY.

Also vial of his blood? You can totally have it. Obviously, I gotta mention it.

While The Rock is not one to cheat, that was the service you offered any heel clients you valet’d for but it was a matter of trust. Trust that he can get the job done because he always could.

He’s finally out of his shell enough to let you take him to a goth club and boy does he fit in with the way he dances.

You have full control of the music when y’all are driving from place to place until one song that he just can’t stand and he takes your CD out. Not even huffing will make him budge.

He sings to you. He takes the songs you like and randomly sings them to you. He wants to dance with you. He’ll even try to sing them slowly for a slow dance. It becomes a battle to see how long you can go without laughing.

He sometimes goes to wrestlers like Edge & Christian (and sometimes Undertaker) for advice on gifts.

Mankind ADORES you.

While I wouldn’t recommend on WWE/WWF Wedding (name one time the ceremony succeeded), if y’all confident it’ll work for y’all and Mankind is gonna officiate. That or Dude Love (who happens to be great pals with Mankind).

Rocky does help you break some of your heel-ish habits. Despite it all, he encourages you not to be TOO underhanded. Not in a controlling way but in a “you can do better” way, y’know?

In general, this is a relationship that a lot of other folks think shouldn’t work but it works just fine for the both of you.

[thequeenofsarcaasm]

As antagonist who do you think is better between Sukuna, Kenjaku, or Toji? Why? How will you rank them?

Kenjaku duh: 1000 years of defiling bodies and only catching a fade once. Kenjaku is the type of person to annoy everyone they meet but never get their ass beat. They’d run the school grounds.

More seriously, a good villain must make me feel intense things. Kenjaku disgusts me deeply because of their wicked, vile ways. Using a dead woman’s body to make a child is so vile (this is a Jin Itadori hate account btw) that it constantly lives in my mind. And yet, Gege made them entertaining enough for me to still like them. If Kenjaku existed, Jimmy Fallon and Ziwe would probably invite them on their shows (as they did with Trump and G Santos) and it would create a huge debate on Twt but Kenjaku would still win the elections (or steal them). As a person who takes having fun extremely seriously I cannot not root for them a little bit. Let women breathe (they’re not a woman ik) 💅🏾

Toji: Changed the trajectory of everyone’s future in like 4 episodes. Put some respect on his name. Toji is a very interesting (despite being loved by 90% of the fandom just for being “hot” and strong) and tragic character which elevates him as an antagonist. I keep asking myself what would have happened if he chose love and family over revenge.

Sukuna: I don’t like his haughty ass. I’m sorry but I don’t understand what y’all see in him. He can descend to the nearest hell and never come back. Sure, he plays his role perfectly but I just don’t see anything in him. Especially when there’s someone like Kenjaku around. I do recognize his qualities as a villain but I must admit I’m biased when it comes to his decrepit ass. You’re 1000 yo using a child’s body to commit atrocities. WHAT DOES URAUME SEE IN YOU?

Sick character design tho.

[lavastories]

The Votes are in from my post before the last post. My next good read will be….. *drum roll*

Psi

Now, I don’t know what to expect from this book besides that there is a side that is normal and another that’s magically gifted. I’ve done my absolute best to avoid any spoilers for any of the books in case I do choose to read them on Reddit, Twitter, Instagram, and even here on our home base Tumblr! I even do my best as well to not spoil it for any of you as. I drop little hits that’s possibly in the book and leave the imagination up to you in hopes that you also read it. But let’s get into some chapters that I read today!

Time Catcher

After reading the recently released chapters, I gotta say that my speculations were spot on! 🥳 I mean, I knew that they’d want MC for something. I was ready for this outcome but what threw me off was wanting MC to prove herself…😑 Come on Vesper, last I checked you need MC not the other way around. As far as I’m concerned she doesn’t need to prove anything to anyone. And don’t even get me STARTED on the LIs. Welcome to a new beau to the plot: Lucien. And he is literally one sexy ass vampire. Sexier than Vlad…*coughs* I mean, I’m just saying. You gotta get a look at this guy—Moving on! What the hell is up Shen?!?!?! I get the whole going through the ringer but MC has been through some trails and tribulations herself. I don’t see her acting clutched…*thinks*—Let me rephrase that. I don’t see MC acting all that clutched all the time! Obviously, she get her secrets and pains. I’m starting to lowkey think if MC is an addict.🤔 Also, did MC get caught?!😱

Next up! Love, Sin, & Evil!

*sniffles*🥲 Guys, so much went down in just two chapters. It’s honestly a lot to process…🥳But, let’s break it down, shall we?

Okay, so during this read MC is literally dancing with darkness…LITERALLY! And let’s not forget about MCs boyfriend. (I don’t know who y’all chose but I chose Tony…like one does😤) And in the mist of chaos, MC lost him just like that! Just to save her. 😢I honestly blame my choices. But I’m coming up with some major speculations here. Hear me out: The shadow, phantom—or whatever you want to call it—referred to MCs boyfriend as a “third wheel,” indicating that it would get rid of him.🤔🤔 Now, you see, you don’t go getting rid of someone without an agenda. The Phantom doesn’t look like it wants to get rid of MC just the people around her. The Phantom wants MC but why? I also peeked that it called MC a “Van Helsing,”—mind you, you don’t go dropping that name around if you ain’t dealing with some real dark evil shit. Maybe MC carries this bloodline—the blood of a Van Helsing. In my pervious post I mentioned that it could have something to do with MCs heritage/bloodline. And looking here, the Phantom is dropping the Van Helsing bomb. But back to the main speculation: What could the Phantom possibly want with the MC?—it’s like the Phantom in some shape or form is becoming a LI—a dark one at that. Maybe, there is a dark love story or some prophecy that has to be fore filled or get backed to?🤔 There is definitely some spooky shit going on. And MC lost two people already equaling two candles being blown out. Obvi, I’m still piecing together the love, sin, and evil I’m sensing so far to the story. And this is what I got: The Love, is the romance between a Van Helsing and a dark being. The Sin, is the betrayal of both Van Helsing and dark being. The Evil, could be the cause and effect of the love and sin that were committed in the past, birthing something new and sinister. And let’s be real, Jonny is smart as hell because right now Mister-all-so-kind-professor isn’t looking all that kind. I’m starting to feel he’s behind it. Trying to unlock or free something. And he needs MC for that maybe?🤔 Or…his career was shit and he really need the win to prove that he can do better?😅 Either way, professor explorer is turning into professor WTF!

I’m all for the adventure but whose going to tell the princess that she’s part of the LGBTQ+ community? 👀 Someone’s gotta do it.

*Looks to MC*

Lavender: Are you going to tell them?

MC: Gosh! You catch two girls in the act one time and your suppose to break the new. *pouts*

*Lavender looks to the crowd*

Lavender: Someone’s gotta tell’em

*MC glares*

MC: You utter anything that happened in that room with Sue and I’ll have romance club revoke your privileges.

Lavender:………

*Both seats in silence*

[lightlycareless]

Chapter 30 - thoughts.

Hello everyone!! Here we are… back again… with more notes! The behind-the-scenes, what makes me tick… or not lol.

As always, I do not recommend reading this before reading chapter 30, which you can find right over here in ao3!

Thus, these notes contain SPOILERS.

Now, without any further ado, let’s get into the details 😏

I posted this small spoiler a while ago:

and as foretold, here is a callback of that infamous chapter 12 lol. Even the “Let’s get something to eat” is worded exactly as Naoya did because I wanted to show this is some heavy case of déjà vu, even though it’s not under the same sentiment. As well as to scare y’all with the thousands of possibilities that could lead to the same results as before

Anyways, moving on 😳

Y/N doesn’t want to be there, outside of the necessary, just how Naoya was during the first time they went to the doctor, and Naoya wants to be there, and not because he is eager to learn about Y/N’s condition (although, deep inside him… very, very deep inside, he is, mostly out of his curiosity/ignorance) but rather because he wants to be with her and rekindle what they never had.

I know many were expecting something to happen between the two at this point, specifically in the communication department 😂 but let’s be real hahah Y/N is uninterested In anything that has to do with Naoyaaaa she doesn’t care, she doesn’t bother, and more specifically, she doesn’t want to interact with him (queue a song from the group I now realized most of their songs fit the story perfectly, coincidentally, my favorite one)

Their whole interaction was… hard to write down, and I guess it makes sense because it’s supposed to be frustrating, it’s supposed to be awkward. Show that their relationship is broken (beyond repair?) and everyone can see that 😅 Can you imagine seeing them at a distance and their issues are like so obvious that you're just like

The people helping them throughout they visit must've been like "uuhhh, should we leave?"

Naoya wanting to talk to Y/N was somewhat… pathetic at one point. I felt sorry for him but hey, as I said before, play stupid games win stupid prizes.

He tries to have conversations but he’s just acting… I don’t know how to say it, blindly? Delusional? Like he doesn’t get why she is being so cold towards him without bringing Naoaki—and that’s another thing that even bothered me lol Naoya is very self-conscious, his self esteem is on the ground, if not lower, he literally can’t stop thinking about his brother and his wife and wondering just what kind of things they’d do together 😂 like, I get it but come on!!! (more than I would like to admit 😭)

He's nowhere near understanding what is actually the real cause of his broken relationship, but as they continue to interact (kind of) with one another… maybe he will. Or not. That’s the interesting part that I’m looking forward to explore hehe. If there’s any redemption on Naoya’s part, is not going to be easy, and certainly I don’t think Y/N is willing to accept it right now (or at all) anyways.

I wonder how can he be redeemed? What will it take for him to finally open his eyes?

Now, moving forward to the whole medical thing.

Naoya and Y/N going to certain doctors prior the main consultation was definitely Ranta’s plan. It was something of “You need to reaffirm Y/N’s health beyond any reasonably doubt, is there anything you can do to do that?”

“The doctor did say something about getting examinations…”

And there you have it. Naoya made the call, scheduled the exams, and took Y/N. But I’m not going to say that he didn’t take her before because he forgot, in between work and having the general understanding that her issue was going to be fixed by just “waiting it out” he just… well, Naoya didn’t care about doing anything until it was beneficial for him, since he’s the kind of person to underestimate women’s health and the issues they could have. Let’s not forget he was forged in a misogynistic household so... 😭

Also, I’m not sure if there are certain labs that process your results in matter of hours lol since the earliest I’ve seen is… aa few hours, later that day if you’re there as soon as they open, but who knows?? Money makes the world go round haha. I actually had to go to the doctor a few weeks prior so everything was fresh 😎 I hope that even when time was overlooked, the rest was accurate 😂

From there, Y/N.

Y/N is… healthy. As healthy as she can be. Hormonally I think that’s a bit difficult to find out (and considering that Naoya was doing everything quickly, as well as the doctor and the Zen’in clan not interested in giving her “treatment” for it…) which is why the doctor was a bit curt when it comes to responding Naoya’s question. As well as trying to fill out another agenda.

It’s just putting Y/N in a stickier situation, but at the same time, gives her more time to stay away from Naoya, and get rescued by Hinata on the process. Had the doctor said she was fertile by some reason… ugh. Nope. Or not, because Naobito also gave them a timeline to act if their marriage was to continue, or in Y/N’s case, her life. (Please don’t ask me about times hahahahahah)

However you look at it, they're on the short end of the stick. Y/N is just in the shorter end. (Naoya consoling himself with the fact that at least she won't be with Naoaki in one of those alternatives is nasty. get rid of him, please)

I guess we could say that it would make sense Y/N was healthy. She’s taken the medication the doctor prescribed her, as well as stopped taking anything that might alter her hormonal profile or whatever. And in the sense of her wounds, she’s abstained from doing anything that might worsen that situation, thus, she healed rather quickly… let’s say that her health predicament is a combination of a rather healthy disposition, and well, maybe something having to do with her impressive ascendancy 👀?

We all knew that, however, the doctor and Naoya didn’t and I find it atrocious how they’re scrutinizing her for it.

Writing how Naoya was there while the ultrasound was being performed on Y/N JUST TO SEE IF HE WOULD FIND A FETUS OMG that was super infuriating and demeaning. I was just… UGH instead of wondering if she was ok, if there was a way to support her, Mr. Delusion was thinking about Naoaki and his wife!!! Kajgakgkajghkajgvhjka AND THE WAY THAT HE LISTENED CLOSELY TO THE DOCTOR’S INSTIGATION TO SEE IF SHE WAS TELLING THE TRUTH??? ah, isn’t he a wonderful husband?!

I think that Naoya might’ve kept this a secret from Ranta since he knows he wouldn’t approve of him taking this moment to also check if something had occurred between the two.

Although I presume Ranta already knew his best friend was going to do something like that (Hence the BE GENTLE NAOYA instead—as to make up for the errors he absolutely knew he was going to commit lol) Ranta really is the voice of reason in this situation, yet, wrongly motivated.

And if Naoya is somewhat trying to become… “better” (due to RANTA’S SUGGESTION) he still has a loooong way to go. Hm.

Finally, the doctor :>

Ok so, we already knew he was a terrible, unprofessional man from the last time we visited him, but this was just in a whole ‘nother level. And all because he was previously informed by Naobito himself!!! Even as awful as that really is in the story, I loved writing it because I like tormenting my characters hahah it's a way to ground, remind them of the the fact that even if they were away (feeling somewhat safe) he’s still closely watching.

I’m sure Ranta warned Naoya about it, and Mariya might've considered it, but it was one of those things that they'll have to deal with, even if it’s risky 😅 because both are still getting something beneficial out of it, even if it's the bare minimum.

The instigation on his part, however, although ignited by Naobito… I don’t think it was intended to go as far as it did (He’s still a mere mortal compared to the Zen’in haha so he might get fired from it) but that didn’t stop him. Naobito was pretty clear with what he wanted, to remind them of what's at stake and to stop playing those "stupid games" of getting along with one another and just do what's expected 😳

His words were designed to light a fire under Naoya's ass and stop moping around the estate. Hence, the constant reminder of Y/N's possible infidelity.

And he didn't stop there, he also slandered his close relatives lol it was a combination of "your brother's are worthless, and yet, look at one of them, getting all cozy with your wife :^)"

I would've loved to see him bring Toji into the conversation—I bet Naoya would've jumped to defend him 🙄

Y/N being compared to Tomoko by being “difficult” was foul for both women. Tomoko had a rough set of pregnancies because of Naobito’s obsession with getting a powerful heir that will help him secure the position of leader of the clan. (can't wait to develop her a bit more 😏)

The husbands in the equation are putting their respective wife’s health in a critical condition, and they don’t even realize it… wow. Is this man even passionate about his career? Why did he even choose something like that if he was not going to help them, or at least call them out?

Money, I guess.

But circling back to Naobito’s intervention, it makes me wonder just how far have the rumors of the situation going on between Naoya and Y/N have spread. I doubt the Zen’in are ones to reveal their issues to other clans (at least intentionally) but it kind of reminds me of the situation with the Kamo clan and Noritoshi’s mother.

The L/N knew of it because they were a close relative of hers, as well as being there to receive her when she was eventually cast aside. However, it’s been stated that the Zen’in are particularly… secretive towards Y/N’s family due to something Naoya might’ve or might’ve not done. So at least, we know they don’t know (and care).

As for the rest of the clans, I’m sure the elders have gossiped more than they should’ve (or maybe even the staff) and some words have reached the ears of the Gojo clan whom more likely than not, have people sneakily hidden inside the ranks of the Zen’in staff in hopes of getting something that might benefit them lol.

At the end of the day, this whole chapter was a callback to that infamous doctor visit, and see… what has changed so far. Naoya and Y/N are completely different people from back then, and we’ll see it on the following chapters!

There’s going to be more call backs, (yellow… yukata…) as well as exploring a bit more of loreeeeee!!!! I’m so excited to write these chapters as the story progresses, and overall, just see where the characters take us!!

Gjklagjkahgjka Thank you so much for your patience!! I hope you continue enjoying and supporting the rest of the story!! Take care, and hope to see you soon!.

P.S. These are just the most important parts that I remember as highly influential for writing the chapter, but if there’s something that you’d like to see further explained just send me an ask and I’ll be more than happy to respond!!  ❤  (At the best of my spoiler-free ability, of course)

P.S. 2: I’m going on a break after the following chapter because I’m going on a cruise!! It’s so…. Exciting… 😭 I’m looking forward to it. And who knows? Maybe I’ll get some inspiration out of it hehehehehehheeh

[this-whole-situation]

I dunno…its antiblack as fuck and nobody ever talks about it, OTHER than other black people. Nobody talks about Bismuth, or the comparisons between sugilite and sardonyx, or how the show has a fucking human zoo (which were real btw) just so there was a bunch of ‘uwu so hot people’. Nobody talks about the sidelining of Garnet for the diamonds, Rose and Pearl and how she was both a stoic and magical negro for much of the show. Oh, and don’t forget how Concrete somehow magically ‘snuck’ by Sugar despite being a literal minstrel character.

Oh god! I also forgot how Pearl got to violate Garnet’s consent and Garnet had to basically comfort Pearl and Pearl’s feelings and hastily make up or they’d both die. Disgusting.

That’s why I don’t like the show. Not because of how lgbt friendly it was. And quite frankly it could have been more for lgbt people (tell me why the only nonbinary characters are fusions and the one between two kids is only fem until they finally get a stubble like 4 seasons later?)

(y’all love to harp on this and then ignore the racism but im not trying to be enbyphobic and say you can’t be nb and fem. What i mean is, Stevonnie isn’t completely accurate of both of their gender presentations. Stevonnie brings out both of their femininity which is great, but then Steven’s masculinity is left at the door? How is that fair?)

Why did it take until a sequel series to get a HUMAN nonbinary character? Sure, the gems are mono gender but having a gender identity be entirely represented by an alien race is not entirely the win y’all think it is. They wouldn’t have made Shep in Future if the crew didn’t think so themselves.

And don’t even get me started on how much it cribs from Utena for nothing but the aesthetics while simultaneously missing the fucking point of Utena and its themes.

people discovering steven universe in 2023 are always like "this show is really good why the hell were yall so weird about it"

[coolstorysister]

movie starters

Wait! I didn’t steal anything! I was returning something I stole!

It’s not about saving our world. It’s about saving theirs.

That is one messed up looking dog.

Baskin-Robbins always finds out.

I realized you can’t destroy power. All you can do is make sure that it’s in the right hands.

It is really important to me that (name) never finds out about this.

Just because I cannot see it, doesn’t mean I can’t believe it!

My dearest friend, if you don’t mind...I’d like to join you by your side.

For it is plain as anyone can see, we’re simply meant to be.

Please, I’m only an elected official here! I can’t make decisions by myself!

“Haven’t you heard of peace on earth and goodwill towards men?”   “NO!”

And for a moment, why, I even touched the sky.

“What are you going to do?”   “I’m gonna do the best I can.”

I sense there’s something in the wind that feels like tragedy’s at hand.

Oh, god, y’all, two killers? We’re not safe awake or asleep.

The only thing to fear is fear himself.

I’m dying to see what skeletons are hidden in your closet.

Yeah, well, you better start thinking outside your little box, dude, cause somebody’s definitely breaking the fucking reality rules, okay?

Welcome to my world, bitch.

I don’t know what to do anymore. Except maybe die.

Okay, anybody on our side hiding any shocking and fantastic abilities they’d like to disclose? I’m open to suggestions.

“Can you move your seat up?”   “No.”

I don’t know if you’ve been in a fight before, but there’s usually not this much talking.

“They’re my friend.”   “So was I.”

“We’re outside the law on this one, so if you come with us, you’re a wanted person.”   “Yeah, well, what else is new?”

Compromise where you can. Where you can’t, don’t. 

“You couldn’t have done that earlier?”   “I hate you.”

I retire for what, like five minutes? And it all goes to shit.

Vengeance has consumed you. It’s consuming them. I’m done letting it consume me.

“Are we still friends?”   “That depends on how hard you hit me.”

I can do this all day.

So you like cats?

“Do you even remember them?”   “I remember all of them.”

I know you’re doing what you believe in, and that’s all any of us can do. That’s all any of us should...

We try to save as many people as we can. Sometimes that doesn’t mean everybody.

In my culture, death is not the end. It’s more of a stepping off point.

Sometimes I wanna punch you in your perfect teeth.

I’m doing what has to be done, to save us from something worse.

An empire toppled by it’s enemies can rise again. But one which crumbles from within? That’s dead...forever.

The people that shoot at you usually wind up shooting at me.

“Anyone tell you you’re a little paranoid?”   “Not to my face. Why, did you hear something?”

I know we’re not perfect, but the safest hands are still our own.

When you can do the things that I can, but you don’t, and then the bad things happen? They happen because of you.

I can’t control their fear. Only my own.

This isn’t gonna change what happened.

Staying together is more important than how we stay together.

You know what’s about to happen. Do you really wanna punch your way out of this?

As much as I hate to admit it, if we’re gonna win this one, some of us might have to lose it.

They say there is a correlation between generosity and guilt. 

“You lost someone.”   “I lost everyone. And so will you.”

You guys know I can move things with my mind, right?

[frodo-with-glasses]

Do you just not like gay people? I'd rather you just say the quiet part out loud so I can block you

With all due respect, Anon, I fail to see what this has to do with Lord of the Rings. 

Oh, but you’ll probably want a serious answer, tho. Very well. I mean, I’d rather talk about any number of more interesting things than sex—like walnuts, or toenail clippings, or watching paint dry, or perhaps the consistency of squirrel droppings—but in the interest of making my own stance clear, and answering the questions that I’m sure have hovered unasked in the minds of many of my followers, I will provide the most kind and thorough answer that I can. 

But I’m still putting it under a read-more, because, as aforementioned, it has nothing to do with Lord of the Rings. 

The short answer is no. No, I don’t dislike gay people. I’m sure most of my follower count identifies as gay, or somewhere along that spectrum, and y’all have been lovely ever since I began this blog. To be fair, I know more than half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve, but so long as you’re nice to me and leave fun interactions on my artwork, I like you plenty. If that’s satisfactory to you, good!

Because the long answer is more complicated. 

Hate the Sin, Love the Sinner

The first thing we must do is define the difference between “liking someone” and “approving of what they do”. If you’ve been anywhere near most Christian circles—or just listened to Hamilton—you’ve probably heard the phrase “hate the sin, love the sinner”. That phrase applies here. I have religious reasons for believing that the lifestyle of homosexuality is wrong, but I don’t harbor ill will towards the people who practice it. There’s a difference between disliking a person and disapproving of their actions. 

I don’t approve of smoking. I think it hurts people. That doesn’t mean I hate people who smoke. On the contrary, I care about them, and I would rather they don’t get lung cancer and breathing problems later in life, so I would urge them to quit smoking. 

I don’t approve of gambling. I think it hurts people. That doesn’t mean I hate people who gamble. On the contrary, I care about them, and I would rather not see them form an addiction that squanders away all their money to an uncaring corporation, leaving them poor and unhappy—or just as bad, winning the jackpot, and then being rich and unhappy—so I would urge them to quit gambling. 

I don’t approve of any and all forms of self-harm. It hurts my heart. I watched my best friend go through a long period of depression and self-harm, and it utterly broke me, that someone I loved would have to cause themselves external pain in order to get a reprieve from the pain they felt inside. I didn’t hate my friend. No, no, no, that couldn’t be further from the truth. I loved my friend more than my own life, ached for them, and wished more than anything they’d stop this thing that was hurting them, because I couldn’t stand watching a sickness slowly torture someone that I dearly, dearly loved (and still do). 

In the same way, I believe in a loving God who made us, knows us inside and out and front and back, loves us deeply, and wants what’s best for us. He once said, “The thief comes to steal and kill and destroy, but I have come that they may have life, and life abundantly”. I believe that, in His wisdom and kindness, He left us a Book of instructions on how to find that life. He laid out the road to that destination—the straight and narrow path—and He said, “Just follow Me, and I’ll get you there. I’ve put up guard rails along the way where there are pits by the side of the road.”

And I said, “What if I fall in?”

And He said, “Just turn around and take My hand. I’ll pull you out.”

If you’d known someone all your life, and they’d always proven themselves worthy of your trust, you’d believe them when they said “this is the right way that will lead you to safety, and that is the wrong way that will lead you into danger”. So it is here. He outlined, very clearly, in His Book, what is the sexual ethic for which He designed us. Contrary to popular belief, there’s actually a lot of freedom within that ethic; He basically said, “Lady, here’s your man, and mister, here’s your lady. Now you promise to be good and loyal to each other and take care of one another forever? Yes? Great, the rest is yours, have fun, kids.” The Bible actually has very little to say about sex as long as it’s in the right context. But anything outside of that context—including homosexuality, beastiality, incest, fornication, adultery, lust for someone other than your partner, etc.—is a pit by the side of the road, a bug and not a feature. 

So you see that I have religious reasons to disapprove of homosexuality. I have been told—by Someone I trust more than my own judgment—that it is outside His planned parameters for the world. But this does not mean I automatically dislike those who do not share my faith and convictions. I can believe they’re in the wrong without disliking them.

To put it simply, “I don’t like what you’re doing” DOES NOT EQUAL “I don’t like you”. I’d urge you to keep that in mind; it’s a good life lesson in general. 

So now that we’ve established that baseline, let’s look at how it applies to this blog. 

The Rep Sheet of Frodo-With-Glasses

Now, of course I’m a biased party, by nature of being the defendant in this trial (and my own lawyer LOL), but I think you’ll find that a fair and honest analysis of everything on this blog will reveal that I never even once expressed disdain for gay people. 

I’ve made it very clear where I stand on shipping through disclaimers on my art. I don’t ship Frodo and Sam, or Legolas and Gimli, etc. But to jump from that to “you must not like gay people” is like saying that because I don’t ship Romanogers in the MCU that I must hate Russians. 

I have repeatedly expressed that I see my own friendships reflected in the friendships in LotR. For that reason, they’re very important to me, and I feel no need to interpret them as anything else. To jump from that to “you must not like gay people” is like saying that because I am perfectly content with plain vanilla ice cream, I must have a personal vendetta against chocolate fudge. 

I have posted a disclaimer setting expectations for a passage I knew could be interpreted very differently. I expressed my own understanding of the nudity involved, and asked that my followers please have the decency to respect my interpretation of the story, with a few tongue-in-cheek jokes to lighten the mood. To jump from that to “you must not like gay people” is like your high school English Literature teacher giving an F on your perfectly formatted and well-argued paper just because your interpretation of the blue window curtains doesn’t match the one in the textbook. 

I have engaged in polite discussion with an anon who complimented my art. When the discussion came to “immoral relationships” between the characters, my response was to celebrate friendship. All I have ever done on this blog was celebrate friendship. I have never insulted gay people, I have never called them slurs or hateful names, I have never even confronted anyone who tags my art as ship art against my wishes. All I have ever done was try to be civil and polite and celebrate friendship.  

Have you ever considered, Anon, that I have been silent for a reason? That “the quiet part” has stayed quiet on purpose? That, perhaps, I did not come here to police my following and force my views upon them, but simply to celebrate a book that I love, and invite people of all stripes to come and celebrate it with me, if they so wish?

Have you considered that, if I disliked gay people, I could block every single one of my followers who express such views on their profiles? I didn’t get to over 800 followers on tumblr, of all websites, by policing those who are allowed to interact with my blog. I didn’t cultivate the community I did by shutting down people I disagree with. 

I am here to entertain myself. I have always been here to entertain myself. I was doing it before there were 800 of you, and I will be doing it long after this blog is gone. Whether or not you would like to join in with me is entirely your prerogative. 

You wanna see how much I hate gay people? You wanna see how far the vitriol goes? Watch this! Sir Ian McKellen is a fantastic actor and seems like a splendid person in real life. No one else could possibly be Gandalf the way he is. To see his face on the screen when I watch Peter Jackson’s trilogy makes me feel warm and fuzzy and happy inside, because I feel like I’m looking into the kindly eyes of an old friend. I enthuse over it every time Phil Dragash manages to perfectly replicate McKellen’s iconic cadence in his audiobook, because it’s like hearing the Gandalf I grew up with speaking the real words on the page. Sir Ian McKellen’s contribution to the fandom, and to the community surrounding Lord of the Rings, is invaluable and irreplaceable. Middle Earth would be a lesser thing without him in it. 

This is now a thing that is on my blog: enthusiastically singing the praises of the work of a gay man. His lifestyle choices, though I don’t agree with them, are separate from the mark he’s left on this fandom, and everything I could have to say about the latter category is positive. 

So, now. Would you like to ask me that question again?

The Dismount

Here’s the TL;DR, in case I rambled on too long:

I do not, and will never, approve of the act of homosexuality. I have religious reasons for doing so; much the same, actually, as I believe Tolkien himself held. 

I harbor no ill will towards gay people. No matter what you believe on this topic, you are welcome to continue interacting with this blog if you so wish. All I ask is what I ask of everyone who passes through here: Be kind and polite. 

Your response is your prerogative. I have expressed what I believe is right, and I will not budge or apologize for it, but I’m not demanding that you agree with me. Heck, I can’t tell you to do anything, and even if I could, I wouldn’t want to. I’m not your mom. I’m not God. You don’t have to answer to me any more than I have to answer to you. How you choose to respond is your choice. 

If that means you have to leave, that’s fine. I wish you all the best, and I hope you find what you’re looking for. 

If you ever want to come back, I’ll still be here, talking about Lord of the Rings. 

[prismaticpichu]

As someone who looovess sweets, I wanted to waste some more time imagining what the Firsts love to snack on after a quality meal! (Or Kraft mac & cheese, I won’t judge.)

~~~~

Angeal 🕊 ~ Kinda the fancier type, a little too stiff for ice cream in a cone but not that person, so he still loves his dessert. Mainly enjoys the kinda pastries you’d find in a diner window. I’d say he’s a cheesecake guy, with some nice drizzle on top!

Genesis 📕 ~ The pseudo-fancy type, always stifling his desire for ice cream to pick out something they’d serve at a lobster restaurant. He’s verrry picky too (like me!), and if the cake is embellished with something he doesn’t like, he won’t touch it (like me! Yes I have my guilt). In reality though, his favorite’s gotta be cookies n creme ice cream with brownie bits.

Sephiroth 🐈‍⬛ ~ Sephiroth. Loves. PUDDING. He LOVES IT. Going out and raiding the market’s supply of vanilla pudding is one of the only things that’ll spur this guy to get out in public. On the bright side, everyone scurries away to take photos from afar, so the dessert aisle is all to himself. Some things are just worth the sacrifice. (There’s no reason for this whatsoever- I think I just associate the color with his hair.)

Zack 🐶 ~ Zack likes ANYTHING that has concerning amounts of sugar in it, ranging from but not limited to: Lucky Charms, chocolate-drenched Oreos, cookie cakes, the sugar found at the bottom of Lucky Charms… His favorite, though, has to be lava cake (the molten descent from heaven and my personal favorite!). Angeal always ends up having to clean up little chocolate handprints, Genesis finds the irony of a puppy eating chocolate award-winning comedy, and Sephiroth is sitting beside him helping himself to the vanilla ice cream that comes with it. (It’s not pudding, but it’ll do.)

~~~~

(Unrelated but since I am like the worst speller, my teachers would always tell me the difference between dessert and desert is that you always want two desserts, hence the double s. Remember y’all, sand and cacti pale in comparison to dirt cups!)

[ohjustkreat]

Closing the Distance

A Shuri x Riri Fanfic

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Notes: Hey guys! I hope everyone is enjoying! These next few chapters will be…interesting!

Table of Contents

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Chapter 3

Somewhere between the stars and the lull of Shuri’s snoring, Riri unfortunately succumbed to her sleepiness. It was Unfortunate for her due to the pair of warriors that had arrived. Fog hung in the air making the Ayo and Aneka look more foreboding than usual. The sun was barely peeking over the horizon and provided minimal light.

“Ah, are you sure we should wake them. They look peaceful.” Ayo suggested.

“Mm, I think waking them will be the fun part.” Aneka responded with a slight laugh.

After watching the pair for another moment, Ayo took the first steps towards the mound. Deciding against her initial plan, Aneka called out her Queen’s name instead.

“Shuri. Shuri!”

The royal began moving “ugh, Riri let me sleep. Do you not know the meaning of vacation.” She let out groggily.

“I did not know vacation meant sleeping on a rock and not checking in, my Queen.”

Ayo said, using the title to both annoy and alert the queen.Shuri jumped up and looked around her. Grabbing her chest with one hand, she used the free one to shake Riri awake.

“Do y’all not know how to let someone get some damn sleep? Was a late morning welfare check too much?” Riri said as she sat up.

“The sun’s not even out yet. And how did you even find us?” Riri continued.

“Tracking equipment of course. We just wanted to check to see if Shuri was okay. But you seem to be enjoying your…company.” Aneka added with a slight snark.

“If it is your wish to stay then we will leave you be.” Ayo added.

Shuri turned to Riri and asked “If it’s okay with you, I’d like to stay a little longer?”

“Of course. I’ll give you a ride back.” She responds.

“Well then, Shuri we will return to the hotel. You have your beads if you need to contact us.” Ayo said before her and Aneka turned to leave.

The women sat on the mound and watched the two warriors leave. They both had their own suspicions about what the couple could be getting up to. Shuri was more than positive that they’d been having a getaway of their own.

“Well, we should probably be heading back.” Riri said as she started to stand up and make her way off the mound. Shuri stood up, stretched and followed after her. The pair started to make their way back down the path with their footprints leaving a trail in the morning dew. Silence hung in the air as neither of them were fully awake, enjoying each other’s company.

The walk back to the dorms seemed much shorter than the night before. The small space felt like a 5-star hotel compared to the night before. Riri flopped down on her bed and decided to just lie there. Tired, she took this time to just be. She hadn’t missed her bed this much since her trip to Wakanda. Even the greatest nation on earth didn’t feel like home did. But lately home still didn’t feel right. It was almost as if something were missing. She just couldn’t put her tongue on it yet. Truth be told, nothing felt right; home, school, her work. She was still processing the events. Taking in Wakanda in all of it’s glory was overwhelming in itself. To say she was amazed by the nation was an understatement and she had only seen a small portion. Even after being kidnapped and taken to an underwater mermaid colony. Even after the war and tragic deaths that followed. Riri didn’t understand how Shuri carried everything so well. She was in awe of her resilience.

Shuri was sitting in the couch opposite of the bed. Her eyes were heavy with sleep as she debated rather to sleep or shower. Her clothes from the previous day clung to her and smelled like the outdoors. She could feel the dirt covering her body. Discomfort winning over sleep, Shuri finally got off the couch. She looked for her backpack that held a her clothes and a few other items besides the blueprints. Sleep still on her voice she asked the other woman “Hey, could I use your shower? It’ll be quick. I promise.”

“Uh, yea of course.” Riri said, snapping out of her thoughts.

“Thanks. I’ll be quick.” Shuri replied holding her clothes and wash cloth as she made her way into the cozy bathroom. She closed the door and sat her clothes down on the sink. She then proceeded to peel her clothes off, layer by layer. Finally undressed, Shuri grabbed her washcloth and pulled back the shower curtain to reveal a small bathtub and shower. Stepping inside, she reached over and turned the knob. Shuri welcomed the hot water that began to spew out of the shower head. Water fell from the top of her head and continued down her body to her feet, washing away all the stress she held in. She never knew a shower could feel this relaxing or maybe she was just tired. Not wanting to take too long, she lathered her rag and finished her shower. After turning off the water, she stepped onto the cold white tiles.

Damn it.’ She thought. ‘I forgot a towel’.

Shuri thought Riri may have extra ones in her bathroom, but after checking every cabinet she came up empty handed.

Walking to the door, she opened it just a little, just enough for the other woman to hear her.

“Uhm, Riri? Do you have another towel I could use? I think I was in such a rush to leave I forgot mine.” Shuri called out.

“Yea. Hold on.” Riri called back.

Riri got up from her spot on the bed and went over to a storage container on the floor. She opened it and pulled out a blue towel.

“You know,” Riri started as she approached the bathroom door, “You better be glad I just did laundry or you’d be wet and upset. Miss me that much you forgot a towel?”

“What, uh, no.” SHURI stuttered out. “Can you just give me the towel, it’s getting cold in here.”

“Yea yea. Here.” Riri said as she gave Shuri to towel through the cracked door. The soft smell of sandalwood crept out up her nostrils. Riri loved that scent and knew it anywhere. ‘Maybe the Wakandan actually has some taste’ She thought to herself.

Riri left Shuri to finish getting dressed and resumed her spot on the bed. The sandalwood still roaming in her nose reminded her of how badly she needed to shower her own self. Although she was tired, she couldn’t sleep smelling or feeling like this. Moments later Shuri came out of the bathroom dressed in black sweats and a black croptop. Riri wasn’t used to seeing the other woman as relaxed as she looked now. It was a different look than the stressed and overworked one she had grown used to in their short time together.

“Man, I an starving. Nothing like a good shower to give you an appetite.” Shuri blurted out.

“Ha, they might be because we haven’t eaten in a while. I can cook something up for us after I shower.” Riri replied.

“You’ve been such a good host. How about I cook while you shower”

“Only if you don’t burn down my place. You already owe me a lab.” Riri joked as she gathered her clothes and other belongings for her shower.

“Trust me, I got this. You just go shower.” Shuri reassured her.

With that Riri rolled her eyes and made her way into the bathroom.

In the small kitchen, Shuri looked around for ingredients. There wasn’t much in the few cabinets that lined the wall, but there was enough for pancakes. ‘And who could go wrong with pancakes’ Shuri thought to herself. Carefully, she began to pour and add all the ingredients in a bowl. Just as she was finishing, she realized she didn’t have a whisk or spoon. Cursing herself for not noticing sooner, she debated on interrupting her friend or make do. Deciding on just asking her friend. As Shuri approached the door, she noticed the water was no longer running. She knocked with no answer. She tried knocking again. Still, no answer. Shuri knew Riri probably had her headphones in and couldn’t hear her. Against her better judgement, Shuri opened the door hoping the other woman was dressed or at least had a towel on.

Shuri was wrong for hoping.

Eyes wide, Shuri let out at series of “Sorry, Sorry, I didn’t mean to.” As she closed her eyes, quickly turned around and closed the door. Noticing her face was growing warm from what she could only claim as embarrassment, she went into the kitchen and got a glass of water.

Meanwhile in the bathroom, Riri was in a state of shock. Not only had Shuri scared her but she had seen her naked. Riri scolded herself for not locking the door. If she could have locked herself in the bathroom forever, she would at this point.

Knowing she couldn’t Riri finished getting

dressed. Finally opening the bathroom door and walking out, a thick tension hung in the air.

“I’m sorry!” Shuri blurted out from the kitchen. “I should have waited” she finished.

“Nah, it’s all good. I should have locked the door and turned my music down. Sooo, let’s stop being awkward?” Riri let out with a suggestive smile.

“Yea, of course.”

“So what did you need anyways?” Riri asked.

“Oh yea, just a spoon for the pancakes, I looked but-“

“PANCAKES! I love pancakes!” Riri exclaimed, looking like a little kid in a candy shop.

“Woah, calm down, it’s just food.” Shuri said.

Riri was almost bouncing with excitement. She hadn’t had her favorite breakfast food in a while. Lately, she didn’t feel like making them. Right now she was grateful for her friend.

Shuri enjoyed watching the smaller woman bounce around with excitement over such a small gesture. She took a step back from the stove where the pancakes were now cooking and fished through her pocket for her phone. While she didn’t use it much, she definitely used it for music. Shuri set the small black phone on the counter and scrolled through her playlist until she found a song to match her mood. Soon soft slow tones began to play, filling the room with melodic tones.

What do you think my brain is

Made for

Is it just a container for the

Mind

Frank Ocean soulful voice started to feel the room. Shuri had grown to appreciate his unique and calming sound. As the song continued, Shuri heard the Riri softly singing in the background. Hoping not to let the other woman know she was listening, Shuri continued on with her task at hand. Riri’s voice wasn’t bad at all, and she actually enjoyed her friends singing. With the pancakes finished, Shuri made both of their plates.

“Apple or Orange juice.” Riri asksd while walking to the fridge.

“Orange is fine.” Shuri answered as she sat the plates on the table and sat down.

“So what are your plans for today?”

“Well, I have class later but we can do some work and hangout before then.” Riri responded as she sat down.

“Yea that works. How are the pancakes.” Shuri asked, watching Riri stuff her face.”

“Mmmm so good.” Riri muffled out.

Shuri laughed, happy to know her food was edible and liked.

The breakfast continued in silence as the women all but scarfed down the food. They were hungrier than they thought.

After all the plates was were washed as well as the other dishes, Shuri and Riri found themselves sitting on the couch. Riri was scrolling through Netflix looking for something to watch. Shuri was cuddled up next to her trying to stay awake. Since it was still pretty early in the morning they had decided to relax for a little bit before starting on their project. Riri settled on some action/comedy movie. After starting the movie it wasn’t long before Riri felt Shuri’s head fall onto her shoulder. Riri felt wrong moving so she let Shuri sleep. Knowing she was probably exhausted, Riri continued to watch the movie. At one point she lost interest and found herself staring at the sleeping woman on her shoulder. Riri could tell from the way Shuri was heavily sleeping, she needed this getaway. Riri didn’t mind. Shuri was one of the only people Riri could tolerate these days. Watching Shuri sleep so peacefully caused the other woman to start yawning. Soon after her eyelids got heavy and she gave up trying to fight sleep. Giving one last look to her sleeping friend, she let her head fall back and sleep consume her. The day was already starting off better than most and for that Riri was thankful.

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Notes: Hi guys! Thanks for the repost and likes, I appreciate the support so far! This story is also on wattpad for anyone who wants it all in one place! I’ll upload again this weekend! Hopefully Saturday.

Table of Contents

[amourology]

𝐑𝐀𝐅𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐑𝐎𝐍 | 𝗄𝗂𝗅𝗅𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗆𝖾 𝗌𝗈𝖿𝗍𝗅𝗒

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 | college!rafe cameron x fem!reader.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 | cursing, making out, hints towards sexual acts, though no actual smut yet, mentions of alcohol. 

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 | rafe reluctantly attends the opening party of the new school year, where he meets a girl who is particularly good at beer pong, smooth talking and making him crumble simply by using her words. 

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 | y’all remember the sub!rafe fic i wanted to write? my angel rita ( @twinklelilstarkey​ ) came with the genius idea of making it a new series bc i had so many things i wanted to write for it. so go show her some love, as this series wouldn’t have been here without her <3 thank u so much rita, ily <3

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 | 2.4k. 

part zero. next part.

Rafe Cameron had made a lot of idiotic decisions in his life. However, he felt like he might have taken it too far with this one. Standing in the middle of an overly full room, empty red solo cup in hand, he couldn’t help but feel an inkling of irritation bubbling up in his stomach towards his previous roommate.

He watched while Isaac once again won a round of beer pong against a random group of girls, the fourth round of the evening, and the fourth round he’d dragged Rafe into. If he didn’t feel all the alcohol now, he was sure he would in about an hour.

“Sorry, ladies, better luck next time,” his friend pouted, and watched as the girls rolled their eyes at him. Downing one of the left-over cups for fun, Isaac threw him a grin. “We’re on a roll, Cameron.” He shook his head and patted his shoulder. “If we win one more round, Elio will have to pay up.”

Now, that did make the smallest hint of a smile appear. “Pretty sure Elio would rather drop out than lose his record,” Rafe grumbled, looking into the empty cup.

“Careful,” Isaac warned, a smirk lingering on the edge of his lips. “Smile any more, and I might start to think you’re having fun.”

Rolling his eyes, he mumbled a slightly annoyed ‘shut up,’ towards his friend, one that got repaid with a sharp laugh. It seemed to have done the trick, though, and Isaac briefly lifted his attention off of him to look for a new opponent – the final one they’d have to beat to break Elio’s previous record of winning four rounds of beer pong in a row.

Though, it seemed Isaac wasn’t having much luck. Each person that passed the table turned down his request for a game, whether it was because of their previous winnings or because of their genuine lack of interest in the game, neither of them knew.

“Oh, c’mon, no one?” His friend called out, throwing his arms up in the air. They got a couple of glances thrown their way, though no one stepped up to play. “What, scared you’ll lose?”

Isaac let out a frustrated sigh, and turned back towards Rafe. “Seems like we aren’t breaking that record tonight,” he complained.

Rafe didn’t respond. Instead, his focus was completely given to the girl currently walking up to their table. The aura of confidence she brought with her was enough to send him spiral into thought, and the small tilt of her lips into a smirk was enough to make him doubt whether it would be best to leave the table while they were ahead.

“I’ll play,” she offered.

Isaac turned around quickly at the words, a chuckle in disbelief slipping out of his mouth. “Great,” he exclaimed with a wide smile, and glanced between Rafe and the girl. “So, you, and...”

“Oh, no, just me,” she clarified, and Rafe frowned. He glanced between her and her friend, and took notice of how the latter whispered something in her ear. “What? Are you guys scared?”

“Psh, as if,” Rafe’s overly confident friend scoffed, nudging him in the side. “Just thought it wouldn’t be fair, two on one and all that.”

The girl smirked, and leaned over towards the table to grab the two ping pong balls. “Don’t worry about that,” she shot them a smile. “I can handle a two on one.” The look she gave Rafe after made him think she wasn’t talking about the same two on one as Isaac.

“Well, okay, then,” Isaac answered, oblivious towards the innuendo she’d hidden within her words. He nodded towards her. “You start.”

She smiled again, and Rafe knew they were doomed.

It took the mystery girl all but fifteen minutes and twenty-three throws to knock their entire asses out of the park. He didn’t know how, but she threw ball after ball into those little cups. In the rare event she missed one, Isaac couldn’t contain his cheers.

“Good game, boys,” she commented, though Rafe knew she didn’t mean it. She’d destroyed them in that game, there wasn’t anything good about it. “Catch.”

She threw the two balls towards them, and both boys had to scramble to catch either one of them – though, they ultimately failed, and both balls ended up on the ground and hopping away from them.

“Shit,” Isaac cursed, and stopped his searching for the balls just a second to share his disdain with his friend. “Guess Elio’s not gonna have to pay up today. And I’d already started planning my dinner for tomorrow with it.”

“Mhm, yeah, uh,” Rafe mumbled under his breath, a frown on his forehead while he glanced around the room. The girl they’d been playing with had walked away faster than he could see, and he desperately wanted to speak to her again. “I have to – I have to go.”

“Where are yo-” He didn’t stick around long enough to hear him finish his sentence.

Slightly to heavily drunk, and on a mission, Rafe tried his best to navigate the crowded living room and even more crowded hallways of the unknown apartment he’d stumbled into a couple hours ago. It probably took him longer than he thought, with the alcohol having affected his sense of time, but he found the girl from before nonetheless.

He walked towards her, and stood beside her friend for a few seconds. Their conversation died down rather quickly at the sudden unannounced presence of the boy, and he cleared his throat upon seeing their confused faces.

“I’m Rafe,” he introduced himself.

She nodded in acknowledgment. “You’re one of the boys I beat in beer pong just now,”

“Yeah, yeah,” he mumbled, and scratched behind his ear with the slightest feeling of shame in his stomach. “That’s me.” Glancing between the two girls, he eventually settled his gaze on her. “Could I – Could I talk to you?”

“Well, you are,”

“I – I know, I just mean...” He glanced at her friend.

Something about her gaze made him feel nervous, and he felt his hands get the slightest bit sweaty. She didn’t make it easy on him. Not in the slightest bit. As she continued staring at him, waiting for him to formulate whatever it was he wanted clearly, he couldn’t help but feel like this was absolute torture. Yet, he didn’t want it to end.

“You mean?” She repeated, trailing off the slightest bit while she and her friend exchanged a look – one that seemed to carry a thousand words, considering the friend knew exactly what was happening, as if it were the most normal thing in the world. Rafe sincerely wished for the friend to let him in on it, too, as he didn’t have a single clue.

“I mean,” he repeated himself, clearing his throat. “Could we talk, like, just us?”

She looked at him, and he’d never felt so vulnerably seen. Her eyes roamed around his figure, and if he didn’t know any better, he’d say he felt the slightest bit insecure. Had he done his hair well, today? Did his outfit work? What if his belt didn’t suit the rest of the look?

“Sure,” she spoke up eventually, effectively putting him out of his misery.

Rafe had to fight the urge to sigh in relief, and instead settled on throwing her a grateful nod. She said some stuff to her friend before bidding her a goodbye, a soft smile now decorated her face as she turned to look at him.

“So, Rafe,” she said, slightly tilting her head to the side. “Is that short for anything?”

“Maybe,” he responded, not wanting to expose too much of himself too soon. If anything, she felt as mysterious to him as the night sky, and he didn’t want to bother her too much with his shining specks of information. “Tell me your name first.”

It seemed he had chosen the right words, as the look in her eye changed into an approving one. “Y/N,” she said.

Rafe let out a soft hum, “That short for anything?”

Y/N smiled at his little jab, and went along with it. “Maybe,” she countered.

Letting out a brief chuckle, he glanced between her and the ground. It seemed so easy a couple seconds ago, when all he knew was that he needed to go and find her, to go and talk to her – now, however, it became increasingly difficult to pinpoint what, exactly, he needed to talk to her about.

“Tell me,” She pulled him out of his thoughts. “How come I haven’t seen you around before?”

Rafe shrugged, feigning nonchalance. “How do you know you haven’t?”

“Because I’m pretty sure I’d remember a face like yours,” she answered, and took a step closer towards him. With a boldness he didn’t know existed, she carefully put her fingers underneath his chin and aligned his face with hers. Stepping just another bit closer to him, she let her lips hover over his. “And I’d definitely remember what I’d have done with you afterwards.”

A soft, shaky sigh left his mouth at the words. With the close proximity they resided in, it became harder and harder for him to keep his cool. Still, he had to know. “What would you have done, then?” He asked, and felt an excitement in his stomach upon seeing her lips curl into a smirk.

Y/N pulled back ever so slightly, and he felt himself longing for her to come closer again. Her hand fell down from his face and she stood up on her tiptoes to reach his ear. “Why don’t I show you?” She whispered.

Rafe gulped, and pretended the goosebumps on his neck weren’t there. “Why don’t you then,” he encouraged her, and felt a tingling sensation when she grabbed ahold of his hand.

She took him to a room he didn’t know existed, and he strongly suspected she’d been inside this apartment before – whether she knew the owner, or whether it was her apartment, he didn’t know and, considering the current circumstances, he certainly didn’t fucking care.

As soon as she’d closed the door behind them, she placed him down onto the bed. With him sitting on the edge of it, she didn’t slowly sunk herself down onto his lap. Her hands found the back of his neck, and his immediately went towards her lower back. Rafe looked up at her, waiting, for her, for anything.

“God, you’re just so pretty,” she mumbled under her breath, and cupped his face with both her hands. “Can I kiss you, honey?”

“Y – Yeah, yes, of course,” he wanted to say more, though felt more than content with her cutting of his possible sentences with her soft lips on his.

Their kiss started soft, and sweet, though he quickly felt her escalating it into something more, something rougher, something passionate. It was the sudden appearance of the familiar feeling that brought Rafe back to the persona he’d wore all his life, and he went and let his hands wander down towards her ass.

Squeezing it harshly, he took over control of the kiss for just a second. He kissed her harder and more feverishly, with one hand on her ass and the other slowly reaching upwards towards her breast – he felt in his comfort zone again.

Until she pulled him out of it for the umpteenth time that night.

Y/N let out a disapproving hum, and Rafe felt someone tugging on his hair rather harshly before he was pulled back from her hold. “So cocky, hm?” She mumbled, shaking her head and making a slight pout with her lips before a look of determination took its place. “Don’t worry, we’ll get that out of you over time.”

If Rafe had never been left speechless before, he surely was now. The girl didn’t give him much time to properly register the words, and instead captured his mouth with hers again. A slightly startled moan left him at the sudden contact, and something in him said not to try whatever it was he just did again.

They stayed tangled up in each other’s arms, kiss after kiss being shared, and Rafe felt an unexplainable feeling wash over him when she leaned down towards his neck. She started lightly sucking on the skin, plastering harsh and soft kisses all over while slightly tugging at his roots – he’d lie if he said it didn’t feel like heaven.

Now completely captivated in her movements around his neck, he reached upwards and wrapped his arms around her form to push her tighter against his body. His senses were running on overdrive and he couldn’t wait to feel her lips on his again, but just as his wish was about to come true, a knock on the door was heard.

Both of them pulled back from one another upon the insistent knocking, and both of them were short of breath as they shot it a glance. “Do we?” He asked, nodding towards it.

“No,” she breathed out, and once again took him into a kiss.

However, the knocking would not stop and they reluctantly pulled back once again. Y/N frowned, her hands still gently cupping his face in her hands. He didn’t know what she was thinking, only that he would give a fortune to know.

“Yo, Rafe, bro, I saw you go in there,” Rafe threw his head back in annoyance upon recognizing the familiar voice. “Don’t be a dick, man, open the door, I gotta take a piss.”

The girl on his lap chuckled. “Is that?”

“Isaac,” Rafe sighed, and looked towards the door.

“Well, go on,” she said, and stood up. It took everything he had not to pull her back onto him. With a slightly amused smile, she nodded towards the door. “Let the boy do his business.”

Truthfully, he did contemplate leaving Isaac to piss himself in the hallway, if only so he could have a fraction more time with her. Begrudgingly, he still settled on opening the door, though mainly because she’d told him to do so.

Now with the door open, he watched while Isaac shouted a quick ‘thanks, bro!’ before breaking out into a sprint towards the neighboring bathroom. Rafe let out a sigh upon seeing his friend run into the room, and went to turn and apologize towards Y/N.

“I am so sorry about him, he’s–”

It took him a mere second to realize he was talking to himself, as the mysterious girl he’d met tonight was long gone.

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