#just because we said no when adults wanted to kiss to say hello (french 'bise' kisses on the cheak to say 'hi' which i always hated) | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

savages-weapons · 6 months ago

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there was backlash from homeschooling "parents rights" advocates in my area before because of a daycare teaching kids about consent...all they learned is that you don't have to accept unwanted physical intimacy. one scenario that happened is a parent told her toddler boy to kiss a toddler girl in class. toddler boy comes back and says that toddler girl didn't want a kiss. it turns out the kids were taught that you don't touch someone if they say "no". parents thought this was ridiculous. I felt crazy hearing them talk about it, why in the world would you be upset by kids respecting each others boundaries, and why are you asking your toddlers to kiss each other in the first place as if they're toys and not human beings?

#the discomfort some adult have with teaching children they can say no to being touched is plainly speaking: horrifying #bear in mind: my mother was criticized by her own parents for letting me and my siblings say it when we didn't like or want something #because it 'wasnt polite' and she 'raised us badly'#just because we said no when adults wanted to kiss to say hello (french 'bise' kisses on the cheak to say 'hi' which i always hated)#(my mother had spent years having so says thx you to people offering things she disliked because she wasnt allowed to say she didnt like it #so we were seen as rude little kids by the rest of the family because we said it when we didnt like something or it made us uncomfortable #the way adults - even in the family - felt like us saying no to being kissed/pet etc was us being rude is still astonishing for me #this kind of attitude toward children combined with that entitlement adult often feel to touch/pet children - often seen as affectionate #even if you as a kid barely know that person you see once every six month at a family reunion #is part of what breeds children and later on adults not telling you when they're being abused #is weird as fuck #it shouldnt be seen as rude to say no to someone kissing you to say hi or bringing up that you dont like something #it's not always justified btw a child can say no to eating vegetable and that isnt something parents should give up on #but understanding that some 'no' are ok while other are not is basically a parent job #rather than the oversimplification that a child should never say no to an adult #relevant of everything #education #society #child abuse

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