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rafesangelita · 1 year ago

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♡ sarah finds out about you and rafe.

warnings: best friends brother, arguing, cursing, brief mention of addiction, suggestive ending ;)

a/n: this takes place the day after this part, so i recommend reading that before. this is the last part so i just want to give a huge thanks to everyone who has shown so much love to this mini series of mine. i’ll be working on requests for the next couple of days but i already have something new that i’m cooking up for all of you 🎀 mini series masterlist can be found: here <3

wc: 1.5k

“hey, how do you want your eggs-” rafe was looking down at his phone when you walked into the room, his jaw tightening as he scrolled through something. “what’s wrong?” you sat next to him as he put his phone in your hands. “look at that shit. sarah has our summer allowance in the fucking negatives,” he was seething at this point. shaking his head, he yelled, ‘fuck!’, making you jump slightly. “i’m sorry,” rafe was quick to reassure you, “no, no, it’s okay. what should we do now?” you rubbed his arm, smiling at him so he knew you were alright.

“well, i’m gonna have to call my dad and let him know that we don’t have anymore money, and of course he’s gonna think it’s because of me.” rafe laughed bitterly. “why would he assume it’s your fault?” you glanced up at him, handing him back his phone. “because..” rafe spoke low, “i had a history of going to the cut and using his money for something else, and he hasn’t necessarily let that go.” he explained. you sighed, thinking for a moment. “look at the recent charges, what do they say?” rafe clicked on the account, his eyebrows knitting in confusion.

“what the fuck. there’s nothing but a whole bunch of atm withdrawals.” both of you looked at each other, “i don’t know how she’s withdrawing money without a card.” he looked around his room for a second, before jumping up and making his way downstairs. “what is it?” you followed him. rafe stayed quiet while he rummaged through his wallet, throwing it across the living room. “the fucking card is gone! she must’ve got it when we snuck upstairs yesterday.” you sighed, “that’s why she was in a rush to leave.” rafe paced back and forth, his head in his hands as he cursed to himself.

“i swear, when i see her-” as if on cue, the front door opened, the woman of the morning strolling in like nothing. “woah, y’all are up early..” sarah smiled, looking between you two before her eyes fell to your outfit.. or lack thereof. “is that rafe’s shirt?” her face morphed into one of suspicion. before you could answer her, rafe cut in. “yeah, it is. do you want to explain to me why the fuck our account is drained?” sarah kept her eyes on you, not acknowledging rafe in the slightest. “why are you wearing his shirt.. and what is that?” she looked past rafe towards the kitchen where you were making breakfast.

“i don’t believe this shit,” she scoffed, pushing rafe out of the way, “my brother, y/n, really?” she laughed. you felt your heart plummet, rafe stepping in once again. “you don’t have any right to tell her shit, you haven’t been very honest either.” rafe unlocked his phone, showing her the negative amount. “what the fuck are you up to? all these atm withdrawals, what are you even taking money out for?” now it was sarah’s turn for all the blood to drain from her face. “it’s none of your business,” she spat, “and you,” sarah walked around rafe, sizing you up as if she was going to do something.

“so, what, i don’t tell you about every little thing going on in my life, and you fuck my brother to spite me for it? that’s low..” she shook her head. you felt all your anger rising to the surface. “i don’t want to know every little detail of your life, just don’t be a selfish bitch and use me at your expense for your little adventures on the cut. lying to your dad so he won’t find out that you’ve been hanging out with pogues, and using your shared account to drain money from is even lower.” sarah stayed quiet, the expression on her face unreadable. “you’re the fakest friend there is.” she adjusted the backpack on her shoulder.

“if i’m the ‘fakest friend’ then what does that make you? you cancelled plans with me last minute, used me to cover for you multiple times, you even ditched our birthday tradition this year. not to mention the fact that you said i was ‘worse than topper’ because i asked you a valid question. i hadn’t seen you for three weeks before yesterday and you got mad because i asked if you were staying on the cut. you do realize that we haven’t been apart for longer than three days since we were five, right?” you were rambling at this point, but you couldn’t find it in yourself to care.

“all i wanted was honesty, sarah. and yes, i fucked your brother, but not to spite you. not saying that, that excuses what i did, but i did that because he’s actually more amazing than you give him credit for. has it occured to you that while you’ve been running around the other side of the island he could’ve locked you out of the account and let you be out with no money in your pocket?” sarah ran her fingers through her hair, taking a seat at the kitchen island. “you don’t know him, y/n. the real him.” she looked over at rafe, her lips curling in disgust.

“you’re wrong and you know it,” sarah shot daggers at him. “fucking my best friend is crazy rafe, even for you. wait till i tell dad about this.” she smiled, taunting the both of you as you stood next to each other. “are you stupid? dad already loves y/n, and once i tell him that you put our account in the negatives because you’re withdrawing from atm’s on the other side of the island, you’ll see what he’s more concerned about. me being with y/n, or you giving up money to the pogues for whatever fucking reason.” rafe pulled you close to him, his hand resting on the small of your back.

“you really think he’ll believe you over me? especially with that little coke problem you had? good luck with that.” sarah opened her backpack, placing the card on the table. you couldn’t believe the words coming out of her mouth. you knew rafe had a substance issue in the past, you were around when he was getting help for that, and nothing about it was pretty. “how dare you?” you narrowed your eyes in her direction. “you’re not anyone to throw that in his face. you’re a cheater and a thief, but no one has told you that yet, right? your dad will believe rafe, because i have pictures on my phone of us that match up with the timing of those atm transactions. me and you aren’t friends anymore sarah.” you watched as she got up, making her way over to the front door.

just as you thought she was going to leave, she turned around, this time with tears in her eyes. “i don’t care, y/n, but you have to be the dumbest girl on earth if you think this weird thing y’all got will last. you’re nothing but another hook up to him. do you really think you’re the first girl to make breakfast for him?” she laughed, wiping at her damp cheeks. “don’t ever talk to me again.” she slammed the door, leaving you and rafe in silence. “don’t believe her, she just wants to make you feel bad.” he took your hand, placing a soft kiss on your knuckles. you nodded, the reality of what you did now setting in. you just unfriended sarah, and you didn’t feel bad about it.

“i’m sorry she brought up your past and used it against you.” you pulled him towards the couch as he rubbed circles into your palm. “she does that every time we get in an argument. it doesn’t phase me anymore.” he rolled his eyes. “will you really do that for me? vouch for me.” you nodded at his words. “of course i will, but i think i know a way where you don’t have to call your dad.” you took his phone. “call the bank and tell them the atm withdrawals weren’t yours and they’ll see it as suspicious activity on the card. they should refund you all the money back if you report the card missing.” rafe looked at you like you hung up the sun just for him.

“you’re the smartest girl i know.” he got up, walking to the next room to make the phone call. while he was doing that, you decided to finish up breakfast, surprised that you didn’t burn anything. quickly putting everything on a plate for him, you were pouring yourself a drink when he walked back into the kitchen. “they put all the money back on the card, we should be good now.” he walked past the plate, wrapping his arms around your waist. “that’s good,” you smiled, feeling his lips on your neck.

“you know, as much as this looks delicious, i prefer my breakfast in bed.” he picked you up, your laughs echoing throughout the house as he took you up to his room.

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tialinffxiv · 2 months ago

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TL;DR say no to generative AI, support human artists

Let me use this example to compile my stance on genAI once again. I will keep repeating this till you're sick of hearing it: genAI has NO PLACE in any form of art, Gpose included. Our community is filled to the brim with artists of many kinds and your "I'm fine using it, idc,lol" is spitting into their face.

Artists, writters, musicians, VAs etc all over the world are fighting against this abuse and the progressive cancer rotting and killing creativeness. By using/allowing/supporting genAI of any sort you are adding to that. "It's just for fun/for free so it's fine/idc"- each is a slap to human artists.

There's no existing ethical and fair for artists genAI models- all of them are build on theft and illegal practices. And there's no positive impact from it on anything- but a huge negative impact not only on creative spaces but also on environment. All of them tries to lure you in with their bs- it's your choice to mindlessly allow yourself to be abused as well by using it.

When you check the original post of mine you will find people who are supporting genAI. And there's more- paywalled tattoo mods using genAI graphics for example. This slop is seeping into Gpose spaces and it's up to us to not allow it. I will callout anyone who support this, hate me all you want.

It's one thing to not know that something is genAI- but when you know it and still chose to use it, with your "idc, lol"- then you're standing in opposition to all artists in our community. It's a stance shared by many MANY Gpose folks, not just me- so you might want to update yours.

Yap all you want about my "arrogant opinion"- but go be brave and share exactly what you replied to me and let's see how folks will love your stance on it. Everyone is free to block me for this- nothing of value will be lost by me when you are among those supporting this mess.

I chose to support artists in our community and a part of that support is helping to weed out people who use/support genAI, or educate them on the matter- but some are not willing to let their slop-producing toys be taken away from them.

Once again: say no to generative AI, support human artists.

Edit: should I repeat it louder then? 📣 genAI HAS NO PLACE IN ANY FORM OF ART, GPOSE INCLUDED 📣

#ffxiv #ff14 #gpose #no to generative ai

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flowerfreya · 5 months ago

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Normalcy

The office AU - Part 16

Reader just wants to get back to normal , but the boys just want to take care of you

Poly!141 x reader

Crazy , ex girlfriend was banned from the premises, if spotted the people in the building were told to contact the 141. She would be violating her restraining order ( you did not know about this) and trespassing.

In the hospital, you did decide to press charges but you made it known you didn’t want to go to court and all that mess. You just wanted it to be over.

The boys felt like they owed you one. But also they just wanted to be there for you.

You wanted to go back to work once the doctor cleared you to go home from the hospital, showing up to the building the next day , sore but ready to work. The boys did not like that. At all.

“What are you doing here?” , John snaps at you.

It has you looking up from the computer, confused murmur, “working”, you answer back.

“Don’t you have a concussion”, Gaz says as he strolls in from the annex. His forehead is creased and he’s straining his eyes trying to see if you are in pain.

“No, only some bruising and messed up ankle”, you answer, starting to get annoyed. They were at the hospital with you almost the whole time. Asked more questions than you did. You know they are just making up shit to coddle you, and you don’t appreciate it (yes you do but you don’t want to admit that yet).

“Maybe yer should on the typing, hen. Might hurt your wrist” , Soap says from his seat, twirling his pen but looking as intense as the other men.

You just wanted to feel normal again. And you don’t have that much saving and definitely not enough PTO to have all this time off.

“I just need normalcy, please”, and money , you say to John.

He is still staring at you. Trying to figure you. Maybe trying to read your mind you don’t know but you look down at your keyboard hoping for him to leave you alone.

In the break room, your warming up a very sad microwavable meal when Simon comes in.

You give a tight lipped smile, “sorry no leftovers today”. He touches your arm causing you to jump, “alright”, he ask.

Shrugging your shoulders, “not really”, you say truthfully. You don’t know but being honest with Simon is easy. Maybe because he doesn’t give you solutions but offers a listening ear.

“I used up all my PTO and I’m for sure in the negative and I can’t afford it”, you say starting at the microwave. Embarrassed. A little ashamed that you everytime something good happens to you another thing ruins it.

“I can donate some of mine to you”, he say.

Your turn to him , shocked, not wanting to get your hopes up. “Are you allowed to do that”, you ask.

(Well first of all , Price was going to pay your regardless, wasn’t going to use your PTO at all, it’s his company, his money. But Simon knows that you wouldn’t want that, he knows that you want to be independent at least for a little bit).

“Already asked the boss”, Simon replies.

You let a sequel, jumping up and down (as much as you could do in a boot). Wrapping your arms around his neck, “thank you , thank you , thank you”, you feel all the stress just about to leave your body.

He huffs, “calm down”, grabbing you by the hips , he holds you in place.

He holds you closer, your chest to chest. Unconsciously matching your breath with his as he leans forward and buries his head where your neck meets your shoulder and inhales.

“Everything okay”, you ask. Holding your arms in the air unsure what to do with them. You know for a fact this inappropriate for work.

“Missed you”, he mumbles.

You didn’t really get a lot of time with him before getting hit by a car and everything.

You close your arms around him, leaving a little kiss on his head, “missed you too”.

#task force 141 #cod x reader #poly!141 x reader #simon “ghost” riley x reader #john price x readee #johnny soap x reader #kyle gaz x reader #x reader

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literaryvein-reblogs · 10 days ago

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Writing your Character's "Inner Critic"

Inner Critic - a mental inner voice that criticizes and judges your actions, thoughts, and behaviors.

In the early 20th century, psychoanalyst Sigmund Freud referred to it as the “superego,” and it’s been a constant source of study ever since.

Learning to address the excesses of your critical inner voice is an important element of self-care and holistic well-being.

Popular psychology movements of today—like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT)—assist individuals with reframing their inner critic’s negative thought processes.

Negative Thoughts From Your Inner Critic

Assessing your mental health means knowing when your inner critic is doing nothing but harm. Examples of an inner voice that engages in self-destructive behaviors:

Dwelling on the past: If you regularly beat yourself up for past mistakes and regrets about life experiences, recognize that many of these thoughts are self-defeating. Your inner critic draws on memories like this to keep you incapable of growing in the present moment.

Focusing on shortcomings: Your inner critic might be a perfectionist—holding you to impossibly high standards—or just constantly echo your deepest insecurities. If you think of yourself in the second person a lot—”you’re not good enough,” “you’ll never succeed,” and so on—you might be under the thumb of your inner critic.

Worrying about the future: You might constantly think that you’ll inevitably say or do something to destroy your future prospects. Your inner critic might insist bad things are inevitable and that you should always stay in your comfort zone since you’re bound to mess things up if you color outside the lines. Heeding these judgmental demands will limit your ability to grow and enjoy all life has to offer.

Ways Meditation Helps Counter the Inner Critic

Slowing down and centering your mind can help you combat the critical inner voice in your head. Here are just five ways meditation can help you:

Empowers you with positive affirmations: Through certain types of meditation—like metta or the “lovingkindness practice”—you can use upbuilding and compassionate thoughts and mantras to anchor your sense of self-compassion and combat the worst urges of your inner critic. These affirmations help reorient your mind in a positive direction holistically.

Enables you to recognize impermanence: At the center of meditative practice is a recognition that the present moment is ever fleeting. As soon as you pay attention to one breath, your mind whisks away to some stray thought. The more you do this—always returning to the subject of meditative focus—the more you’ll see your mind divert to your inner critic’s viewpoint. It’ll become obvious as you continue to meditate that it’s just one point of view among many—and you can pay attention to its demands or ignore it just the same.

Encourages you to determine what’s of value: Not all self-criticism is bad. You should discard needlessly negative thoughts, but you can turn the inner critic into one of your best friends if you tame its voice. The equanimity brought on through meditation helps you see when a critical thought can be constructive or when you should ignore it for being untrue and damaging.

Gives you an opportunity to practice compassion: A mindfulness practice allows you to see yourself from the outside looking in—and this experience often brings about a sense of self-compassion. As you meditate, you can see and feel the damage the inner critic is doing to you from an objective standpoint. This can lead you to treat yourself more kindly and, as a result, treat others more kindly, too.

Helps you detach from your ego: Meditation allows you to reorient your sense of self-esteem away from the attachments of your ego. By distancing yourself from your ego (or “I, me, mine” thoughts) in general, you also distance yourself and even silence your inner critic. Although it might sound contradictory, thinking less about yourself, in general, can significantly boost self-confidence overall.

At its best, the inner critic is one voice among many—and you can take it or leave it.

If you can sift through these self-critical thoughts objectively and analytically, you can discover whether they’re valuable or merely detrimental and untrue.

The former can help you improve as a person; the latter will only bring you down.

At its worst, the inner critic can act as an intrusive, overpowering force—wracking you with unnecessary self-doubt and causing insecurity, depression, and anxiety.

Letting your inner critic run roughshod over you like this usually isn’t healthy.

Managing this facet of your inner dialogue can lead to positive personal growth possibilities, but left to its own devices, it can cause an overwhelming amount of negative self-talk and low self-esteem.

Source ⚜ More: Notes & References ⚜ Writing Resources PDFs

#inner critic #writing notes #character development #writeblr #writing reference #literature #writers on tumblr #dark academia #spilled ink #writing prompt #creative writing #light academia #writing inspiration #writing ideas #character building #writing resources

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its-avalon-08 · 6 months ago

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Can I request something with Lando? With a plus-size reader, where the hate gets to her too much, and she breaks up with him because the internet is hatting on her and being with Lando. Lando is so confused until like Max or someone asks if he has seen the hate, and it makes Lando go crazy at everyone for the hate to his favourite girl, and he gets her back. Please, I'll sell my kidney.🙏

don't go breaking my heart (ln4)

( bubs u don't have to sell ur kidney, here it is! hope u like it )

✦ pairing - lando norris x female!reader

✦ genre - angst, tears, comfort, online hate, fatphobia

liked by landonorris, kellypiquet and others

y/nnnn seashells and splashes

200,456,446 comments

@landonorris : beautiful baby <3, so grateful you're mine ---> liked by author ❤️

@alexandrasaintmleux: stunner girl, ily <3 ---> liked by author ❤️

@hater123: I can't believe Lando is dating someone like her. Doesn't he have standards?

@trollqueen: Someone needs to hit the gym... hard. Yikes.

@f1fanatic: Lando deserves so much better. She’s just not on his level. or weight.

@bodyshamer: Wow, the beach really needs a 'no whales allowed' sign.

@toxicfan: I guess money can’t buy taste, huh, Lando?

@hatersunite: How can she even post these pictures without feeling embarrassed?

@jealousfan: Lando must be blind if he thinks she’s attractive.

@fatphobic: Imagine waking up next to that every day. Poor Lando.

@anonymoushater: Lando’s career is gonna go downhill with her dragging him down.

@judgy: Cover up, nobody wants to see that.

@meanperson: She should be ashamed of how she looks.

@bitterf1fan: Why is she even famous? Just because she’s dating Lando? Pathetic.

@envioushater: ewww, why would he even kiss her? Gross.

@bodyshamepolice: lando could do so much better than this blob.

@trollmaster: She’s just using him for fame. She doesn’t deserve him.

Y/N sat in the McLaren hospitality area, her phone clutched tightly in her hand. She had been trying to ignore the hateful comments on her Instagram, but they were relentless, each one cutting deeper than the last. She scrolled through them again, her heart sinking with every cruel word.

Tears welled up in her eyes as she read the comments over and over. She had always been confident in her own skin, but the constant barrage of negativity was breaking her spirit.

Lily, Oscar Piastri's girlfriend, noticed Y/N's distress from across the room. She approached cautiously, her heart aching for her friend. "Hey, Y/N," she said softly, sitting down next to her. "Are you okay?"

Y/N didn't respond, her gaze fixed on her phone screen. Her silent sobs shook her body, and Lily could see the tears streaming down her face.

Lily gently took the phone from Y/N's hand and glanced at the screen, her own heart breaking at the sight of the hateful comments. She put the phone aside and wrapped her arms around Y/N, pulling her into a tight hug. "I'm so sorry, Y/N," she whispered, her voice filled with empathy. "They’re just jealous and cruel. You’re beautiful just the way you are."

Y/N buried her face in Lily's shoulder, her sobs growing louder. She felt so overwhelmed, so small in the face of such relentless hatred. "I can't do this anymore," she whispered through her tears. "I thought I was strong enough, but I’m not."

Lily held her tighter, her own eyes welling up with tears. "You are strong, Y/N. Don’t let them win. They don’t know you, they don’t know how amazing you are."

But Y/N could hardly hear Lily’s comforting words. The weight of the hate was too much, and she felt like she was drowning in it. She pulled away from Lily’s embrace, wiping her tears with shaking hands. "I need to go," she said quietly, her voice barely above a whisper.

"Y/N, please don’t leave like this," Lily pleaded, her concern growing. "Talk to Lando, let him help you."

But Y/N couldn’t face Lando, not now. She stood up, her legs feeling weak, and made her way to the exit. She walked out of the paddock, her heart heavy with the pain of the hateful comments, leaving behind the world she had once felt so at home in.

time skip

Lando entered their shared apartment, his usual cheerful demeanor dampened by a nagging sense of unease. The McLaren hospitality area had felt off after Y/N’s abrupt departure, and his concern had only grown since.

"Y/N?" he called out, his voice echoing through the quiet space. He spotted her in the living room, standing next to a pile of packed bags. His heart sank. "What’s going on?"

Y/N looked up, her eyes red and puffy from crying. She took a deep breath, trying to steady herself. "Lando, I’m leaving."

His confusion deepened, worry etching lines into his face. "Leaving? Why? What happened?"

She looked away, unable to meet his gaze. "I just… I think you’ll be happier without me."

Lando’s heart pounded in his chest. "What are you talking about? I’m happy with you, Y/N. Why are you doing this?"

Tears filled her eyes again, but she blinked them back. "You deserve someone better, Lando. Someone who won’t bring you down."

He stepped closer, desperation creeping into his voice. "Y/N, you’re not bringing me down. I love you. Please, just talk to me. Tell me what’s really going on."

She shook her head, wrapping her arms around herself as if to hold herself together. "I can’t, Lando. It’s better this way."

"Better for who?" he demanded, his voice breaking. "Not for me. I don’t understand. Please, Y/N, don’t do this."

She finally looked up at him, her heart breaking at the sight of his pain. "You’ll be better off without me, Lando. Trust me."

Lando felt a surge of panic. He reached out, gently taking her hand. "Please, don’t go. We can get through anything together. Just tell me what’s wrong."

Y/N pulled her hand away, fresh tears spilling down her cheeks. "I’m sorry, Lando. I have to go."

She grabbed her bags and walked towards the door, her heart aching with every step. Lando followed her, his own tears blurring his vision. "Y/N, please…"

She paused at the door, looking back at him one last time. "Goodbye, Lando."

With that, she stepped out of the apartment, closing the door behind her. Lando stood there in stunned silence, his heart shattered into pieces. He sank to the floor, his back against the door, unable to comprehend how everything had fallen apart so quickly. He had lost the woman he loved, and he didn’t even know why.

time skip

Lando sat on the floor of his apartment, his head in his hands, tears streaming down his face. His heart felt like it had been ripped from his chest. The apartment, once filled with love and laughter, now felt unbearably empty. He replayed Y/N’s words over and over in his mind, each time trying to understand where it all went wrong.

Lando couldn't, his grief consuming him. His teammates noticed his absence and his silence. It was Carlos Sainz who finally decided to check on him.

Carlos knocked on the door, his concern deepening when Lando didn’t answer immediately. "Lando, it’s Carlos. Please open up."

After a few moments, the door creaked open, revealing a disheveled and tear-streaked Lando. Carlos’s heart sank at the sight of his friend in such a state. "Mate, what happened?"

Lando let Carlos in, the two of them sitting on the couch. "She left me, Carlos," Lando said, his voice breaking. "She said I’d be better off without her. I don’t understand why."

Carlos looked at him sympathetically. "Have you seen what’s been happening online?"

Lando shook his head, confusion mingling with his grief. "What do you mean?"

Carlos pulled out his phone, showing Lando the vile comments, the hateful edits, and the mean-spirited articles directed at Y/N. Lando’s eyes widened with horror and fury as he read through them, his heartbreak turning into a white-hot rage.

"They did this to her," Carlos said quietly. "She left because she couldn’t handle the hate."

Lando’s hands trembled with anger as he continued to read. "How could they do this to her? She didn’t deserve any of this."

Carlos placed a hand on his shoulder. "You need to speak out, Lando. This isn’t right."

Lando nodded, his resolve hardening. "I’m not going to let them get away with this."

He grabbed his phone, his fingers shaking as he typed out a message on social media. His anger and pain poured into his words:

"To all my so-called 'fans' who have been spewing hate towards Y/N, this needs to stop. She didn’t deserve any of this. She is the most amazing person I have ever known, and your words have hurt her deeply. You should all be ashamed of yourselves. If you truly support me, you will stop this now. Hate has no place in this world. And to those companies and individuals who have written those hateful articles and made those disgusting edits, I am coming for you. You will be held accountable."

He hit post, his chest heaving with the intensity of his emotions. "I’m suing them," he said to Carlos, his voice filled with determination. "Every single one of them."

Carlos nodded in support. "I’m with you, mate. Whatever you need."

Lando wasted no time. He contacted his legal team, explaining the situation in detail. "I want to sue every company that published those hateful articles. I want to take down every website that allowed those comments. This has to stop."

His lawyers assured him they would take immediate action. Lando felt a flicker of hope amidst his anger and heartbreak. He couldn’t undo the pain that Y/N had suffered, but he could fight for her, stand up for her, and make sure that those responsible faced consequences.

As the days went by, Lando’s social media post garnered immense attention. Fans and fellow drivers rallied behind him, condemning the hate and expressing their support for Y/N. The companies that had published the hateful articles received a barrage of backlash, and legal notices were swiftly sent.

Lando’s heart remained heavy with the loss of Y/N, but he found strength in his fight for justice. He hoped that, somehow, Y/N would see that he was standing up for her, that he loved her deeply, and that he was determined to make things right.

time skip

Lando couldn’t wait any longer. The moment he finished speaking with his legal team, he grabbed his keys and raced out of his apartment. He needed to see Y/N, to make things right. His heart pounded as he drove to her place, his mind racing with thoughts of everything he wanted to say to her.

When he arrived at Y/N’s apartment, he didn’t hesitate. He knocked on the door, loud and urgent. "Y/N, it’s me, Lando. Please open the door."

There was no response, but he refused to give up. He knocked again, harder this time. "Y/N, please, I need to talk to you. I’m not leaving until you let me in."

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the door creaked open. Y/N stood there, her eyes red and puffy from crying. She looked exhausted, her face etched with pain and sadness.

"Lando, what are you doing here?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

He took a step closer, his heart breaking at the sight of her. "Y/N, please let me in. I need to talk to you."

She hesitated for a moment, then stepped aside, allowing him to enter. He closed the door behind him, taking a deep breath as he gathered his thoughts.

"Y/N, I’m so sorry," he began, his voice filled with emotion. "I had no idea what you were going through. I didn’t see the hate, the comments, any of it. If I had known, I would have done something sooner."

Tears welled up in her eyes again, but she remained silent, letting him continue.

"You are the most incredible person I’ve ever met," he said, his voice trembling. "You are strong, beautiful, and kind. Those people who wrote those horrible things about you don’t know you at all. They’re just cowards hiding behind screens."

He took her hands in his, his eyes locked on hers. "You are perfect to me, Y/N. Every curve, every smile, every moment we’ve shared. I love you more than words can say. And I’m not going to let them win. I’m fighting back. I’ve already spoken out, and I’m suing the companies that published those hateful articles. I’m doing everything I can to make this right."

Her tears began to flow again, but this time they were tears of relief and love. "Lando, I was so scared. I didn’t want you to be dragged down by all the hate because of me."

He shook his head, his own eyes filling with tears. "You are worth everything to me, Y/N. I don’t care about the hate. I care about you. Please, don’t leave me. We’re stronger together. We can get through this, I promise."

She let out a sob, her walls finally crumbling. "I love you so much, Lando. I was just so afraid."

He pulled her into his arms, holding her tightly. "I love you too, Y/N. More than anything. We’re going to get through this together. I’m never letting you go."

They stood there, wrapped in each other’s embrace, their hearts beating in sync. Lando gently kissed her forehead, his love for her shining through his eyes. "You’re my everything, Y/N. We’ll face the world together, and nothing will ever tear us apart again."

She clung to him, feeling the warmth and safety of his embrace. "Thank you, Lando. I’m so sorry for everything."

He smiled softly, wiping away her tears. "You have nothing to be sorry for, love. We’re a team, and we’ll always be. I’ll protect you, I’ll stand by you, and I’ll love you with everything I have."

They shared a tender kiss, their love stronger than ever. As they held each other, they knew that no amount of hate could ever come between them. They had each other, and that was all they needed.

In that moment, all the pain and fear melted away, replaced by the warmth of their love and the strength of their bond. They were together, and together, they could conquer anything.

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itadores · 1 year ago

Text

my type of person.

note: on a tōdō kick rn ... sorry

pairing: tōdō aoi x gn!reader

word count: .9k

tags: gender neutral reader, meet ugly, threats of violence

“What’s your type?”

You blink, dumbfounded by the strange subject of the question. You really didn’t expect for the large and imposing man who suddenly appeared before you only minutes prior to ask that of all things. Perhaps, you should have anticipated it though. You’ve never had the displeasure of meeting Tōdō Aoi in the flesh, but many of your close colleagues have.

“Depending on your answer, I’ll beat you half to death right here. If your answer bores me that means you’re boring, and I hate boring people,” he says through gritted teeth.

He shrugs off his sleek black jacket, allowing it to drop to the floor. Then, he tears his t-shirt into shreds with his bare hands.

What. The. Fuck.

“Huh?!” You put your hands up in surrender, slowly backing away from the man, who (you’re confident) must be out of his mind. “Do you really need to resort to violence? Can’t we just, I don’t know, not fight?” You try and reason with Tōdō, who doesn’t look very receptive to what you’re saying.

“Hurry up and answer the question before I run out of patience,” Tōdō says, stretching his hands that he holds out in front of him. He’s already in a fighting stance, prepared to attack you once he deems your answer unsatisfactory.

Your eye twitches, and you scowl. Fine. If he wants you to answer, then you’ll answer. You take a moment to think about it. You fold your arms over your chest before dignifying Tōdō with a response.

“My type is someone kind.”

He pauses, his hands dropping slightly. For a moment, you think he’s going to be satisfied with your answer and leave you alone. Sadly, it’s too good to be true.

“What kind of answer is that?” He exclaims, clearly unhappy with what he perceives as such a lackluster answer.

“My answer obviously,” you say, giving him a dirty look. Why did you have such bad luck that you had to cross paths with Tōdō Aoi today of all days? All you wanted to do was enjoy your day off, free from missions and free from classes. Instead, it was being interrupted by a massive brute. “I bet your answer isn’t any better,” you retort, pointing an accusing finger at him.

“It’s much better than whatever you just said,” he scoffs, folding his strong arms over his broad chest. Your eyes dart down, following the movement before quickly meeting his gaze once more. At least, he’s nice to look at.

“My type is tall people with big asses,” Tōdō responds, looking especially pleased with himself. His brow twitches with irritation when you start laughing. “Why are you laughing?”

You quickly calm yourself down, regaining your composure, so you can respond without laughing in Tōdō’s face again. “My answer clearly didn’t meet whatever,” you wave your hand around, motioning towards Tōdō’s face, “standards you have in mind, but your answer is just as bad. If anything, it’s worse than mine. At least, I focused on personality. You just focused on someone’s physical appearance.”

Tōdō’s expression grows more and more displeased until he looks like he’s on the precipice of lunging towards you. Uh oh. You take a slow step back, ready to bolt if Tōdō decides to suddenly attack you. You’re really not in the mood to fight on your day off.

Much to your utter surprise, Tōdō begins to cackle. It borders on maniacal as he clutches at his stomach and throws his head back. This may be more unsettling than Tōdō attacking you outright.

“You’re interesting,” he states. A large grin stretches across his cheeks, and his chest still heaves with the exertion of laughter.

“Thanks?” You’re not quite sure if Tōdō means it positively or negatively, so you don’t know if you should take what he said as a compliment or not.

He takes a step forward, and you're tempted to take a step backward, but you decide to take a leap of faith and stay put. You only hope you won't regret your decision. He stands close enough that you can smell the scent of his cologne, a surprisingly pleasant aroma. Not strong and overpowering like cologne often is.

He sticks a hand out.

"Tōdō Aoi. Grade 1 Sorcerer."

You blink, surprised by the sudden introduction. You provide him with your own name and grade, clasping his hand with your own. His hand is massive in comparison to yours, his palm rough with callouses, which is not exactly surprising, but somehow, still relatively soft. You're not quite sure how that can be, but you don't think to verbalize your questions to the man. The sudden change in his personality is strange enough as is.

"Go out with me."

Oh. Things just got much stranger.

"I thought you wanted to beat me up," you sputter, shocked by this turn of events. How does a guy go from threatening to inflict bodily harm onto you to asking you on a date?

"I was only going to beat you up if I found you to be a boring person," Tōdō says as if it's a perfectly normal and logical thing to say. "But you surprised me. You're...interesting, so let's go out."

"You're out of your mind," you bluntly say. Tōdō only grins. You shake your head in response. But maybe, you're out of your mind too.

"Okay. I'll let you take me out." Tōdō's grin widens, but you hold a finger up to tamper his excitement. You don't want him getting ahead of himself now. "But if it's not a good date, I get to beat you up then."

Tōdō's smile threatens to split his face into two.

"Challenge accepted."

#jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #todo x reader #todo aoi x reader #toudou x reader #toudou aoi x reader #new.mail #from.jujutsu kaisen #love.todo aoi

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kysuguru · 1 year ago

Text

two out of three. that’ll work — stsg x fem!reader

synopsis : gojo still doesn’t take to you, but in the throes of your eyes geto’s smile is prettier and shoko’s personality is much more welcoming. you’ll live.

all mine masterlist

includes / cw : nothing ^_^

a / n : i’m sooooo sooo so sorry for such a long wait, truly. i nitpick HELLA. and i want everyone to remember this book was made on a whim. an impulse book if u will. so even though i have concrete ideas and outlines for the main plots, i’m writing as i go while making my way there. I trashed this about three times before finally coming to a conclusion i was somewhat satisfied with. please enjoy

You lay awake, staring at the ceiling of your dorm absentmindedly. Your alarm has yet to ring. It’s presumably thirty minutes before you have to get up and prepare for the day. Your eyes are burning and it hurts to blink, your throat feels dry and scratchy; aching for its thirst to be quenched, and your body is exhausted beyond belief. Your brain craves rest more than anything, but you still aren’t able to succumb to that sweet sleep you crave. It’s been about 15 minutes already, you think. If the steadily rising sun is anything to go by. Time passes by fast when you need it to be slow. Maybe it’s the nerves. Or the fact that it wasn’t until midnight that you returned to your dorm.

Five hours of sleep was the minimum you could get, your brain didn’t let you rest long. But you figured you’d be alright. Whenever curses were near your house, one instance of one being in your bedroom, you remember not sleeping at all if not at least 30 minutes. You got in trouble that day and scolded by your mother for sleeping in class.

As of now, your eyes are droopy and red and your body feels cramped. But the accomplishment you feel after understanding more of this foreign world of curses overrode your exhaustion. You’re not sure if you feel that same sentiment now though. You cursed your past self for putting you through such strain. Your thirst for knowledge occasionally brought you one step forward and two steps back. Being all knowing was the only way you felt significant.

As of the moment, it was one of those instances where your yearning hurt more than it nourished. Though, it was all really fascinating. Cursed energy, cursed techniques, and how they worked and came to be, there wasn’t a second you could bring yourself to put the books down. To believe the negative emotions of people fester into those horrid creatures…

It’s no wonder they were around every single corner of your school.

You’re embarrassed to say you still have no idea what your technique is, or the innate technique you were born with — or if you had an innate technique for that matter. From what you know being born with an innate technique isn’t all that likely. They manifest from ages 4-6 yet no matter how much you shuffled through your memories to see if there were any instances where you were forced to use your technique, you’re left with nothing. Maybe you did and just don’t know or don’t remember — that’s the most irritating part. You grip your hair slightly, eyes burning into the white of your walls.

There are bags forming under your eyes, you think. It hurts a bit to blink, since you got accustomed to keeping them open while flipping through books, the intrigue not allowing you to divert your attention from the pages for even a second. But to you, it was worth it. One more step to learning about this and making your way back home. To where your mother was (hopefully) missing you just as much as you do her. Maybe you should get up and attempt to cover up the evidence of your lack of sleep.

You turn to lay on your side, staring at your open palm. If you look close enough you can see a faint scar. You clench your fist closed, blinking groggily. Your breathing starts to get steadier as you stare at your knuckles, your eyes feel as if weights are pulling them down, your mind wanders to random things you don’t remember thinking about a millisecond later.

Before you know it, you’re falling asleep.

Though the three seconds of bliss was nice while it lasted, before the familiar obnoxious beep of your alarm clock rang through your ears.

You sigh. You should’ve expected that. Your mind slipped once you woke and you forgot to turn that damned thing off. Though maybe that mistake was a blessing, being late to your first day of class would be a horrible first impression. Or would it be second..?

Now you stand in the mirror and eye your uniform with intense uncertainty. You have an inkling that you look stupid. So you tug your skirt down a little bit. Ok, now you look 12. You pull up the hem.

…

Maybe you should add stockings.

The addition is better, you deduce. You’re content with this. You smile at your reflection, speaking encouraging words to yourself internally. You feel your body shake a bit at the idea of entering the classroom, the thought of four pairs of eyes glued to your form, but your body relaxes slightly at the memory of Shoko. She called you her friend, whether or not it was genuine, you’ll take what you can get. There is no point in being greedy and craving for what you don’t have — or deserve.

You lift your leg and adjust the back of your shoe to fit over the sole of your feet properly. You huff in satisfaction, standing straight and adjusting whatever you could before heading out.

Wait. Do you need supplies? Shit, now you’re nervous all over again.

Wait, wait, wait. If you needed supplies, you would’ve been informed earlier, so if required, Yaga should be obligated to give you what you don’t have.

…That’s unless he did mention it and you just weren’t listening.

Your back is against your dorm room door as you grip your head in agony. Maybe you should just tell Yaga you got the one-day flu and figure it all out tomorrow.

“Yo. You look like an idiot doing that.”

The voice is familiar, but not familiar in the way you’d like. He was no Geto, and he definitely wasn’t Shoko. You look up, eyes watery, and meet Gojo’s gaze.

“You going through something? Wait, don't answer that, I don’t wanna know,” He says, waving his hand obnoxiously, his lips downturned. “Hate to interrupt whatever’s goin’ on, but class is in thirty minutes. If you’re anything like Suguru you’re an early bird, right?”

“Oh.. sort of,” You respond, trying to discreetly wipe whatever tears that might’ve formed. He watches you do it anyway, following your movements closely. You’re a little humiliated now. He probably thinks you’re pathetic.

His stare is unrelenting, you can feel it even behind those pitch black lenses. It burns into you. Through you. You drop his gaze, eyes on the floor as you shuffle your feet.

Did he need anything else? You’re grateful he let you know when class begins, but you two aren’t exactly best friends, and you're positive this is awkward for the both of you.

But you see his shoes from your peripheral view and they stay rooted to the floor. You hold back a shaky sigh.

“Are you heading to class right now?” You ask in hopes to get rid of the suffocating silence. You don’t think you’ll ever get used to starting conversations. Your eyes are still memorizing every dirt particle on your new shoes (which feel odd to wear, you’re so used to staring anxiously at the ones your mother gifted you a year or two ago). Why did he, out of all people, approach you during your crisis? You wished more than anything that it was Shoko, but from what you know about her alone, you’re more sure than ever that she doesn’t go to class early.

“I don’t usually go early, that’s Suguru’s thing. But I guess todays an exception.” You blink, he has a lot to say. You expected a short, clipped answer. “Anyways what’re you doing out here, and what was with the gripping your head thing? Going through a phase?” He asks a barrage of questions, making sure to push his glasses up in case they slipped a smidge. You seemed perceptive, he didn’t need you staring him down and reading him.

“Oh, I was nervous. That’s all.”

Gojo nods, staring at you for a few seconds longer before his feet finally pick up from their spot on the floor. He’s walking off.

“Wait!” Your heartbeat spikes as the exclamation leaves your lips.

His shoes squeak against the tiles as he halts. He doesn’t turn towards you, but the fact that he stopped let you know he heard you. You don’t know why your heart is beating so loud, you’re only asking a simple question.

“Do we need any particular supplies for class, by any chance?” Your voice rises a pitch, and you fiddle with your skirt, positive you’re coming off as annoying.

“We take notes every now and then, by we I don’t mean me, so a notebook would be nice but isn’t required, and you don’t look like you have one with you.” He shoves his hands in his pockets, finally facing you, “Let’s hope you have a good memory. Sensei likes to run his mouth.” He jabs, most likely to see you panic. It works.

Your eyes widen and you bite your lip, fiddling with your skirt, but you’re shocked once you hear Gojo laugh. He throws his head back and you stare a bit. You’re gonna admit, you expected it to be a little more rough and loud. It sounds a bit odd, but it’s kinda funny to listen to, almost enough to make you laugh along. Now the question that’s been sitting on your tongue has the sudden urge to come forward.

Your mouth moves before your mind processes, “Can I walk to class with you?”

“Huh?”

You screwed up, you didn’t mean to ask that — I mean you did. But with his response you’re kind of regretting it now. “Sorry. It’s just I don’t remember the way, and if you’re on your way there I thought maybe I can tag along. Though, it’s okay if you say no.” You wave your hands frantically, trying your best to salvage whatever dignity you have left. You instantly start playing with your nails, looking down at your shoes.

He’s silent for a moment, as if contemplating. Then he sighs.

“Whatever. Do what you want.”

You beam, thankful.

“I promise not to be annoying.”

“You’re already being annoying by saying that.”

“Sorry!”

“Stop apologizing.”

“Sorry. Oh wait uh..”

“…”

He scoffs before walking forward. You sprint a bit to catch up with his pace. He has really long legs. You stare at his side profile as he walks, if he notices your eyes, he doesn’t say anything. But you catch the twitch of his brow. You watch every movement you catch on his features intently, dead set on getting to know him more. You wonder if your gaze feels as burning as his does on you. As if he knows you inside out.

You were never aware of your staring problem until now.

Gojo is struggling himself. Trying not to meet your gaze. It proves to be difficult, for he wants to glare you down and watch you squirm nervously before you finally break eye contact. He hates how bare he feels when you stare.

“Gojo, what’s your inherited technique?”

“Infinity,” he pops a sucker into his mouth, uninterested. But you ignore that, eyes wide as you gasp in awe, intrigued.

“Can you explain that to me?”

Gojo catches sight of your expecting face, how your eyes glittered as your lips part. He can’t help the stroke of his ego. He quickly became smug.

“I have the ability to manipulate and distort space.” His glasses slip a smidge down the bridge of his nose, you can see a sliver of his eyes. He doesn’t push them up like you expect him to, he tends to do that — from what you’ve noticed — and they’re glowing. “Hold out your hand,” he demands, long fingers splayed out in your face.

You reach up and before you can press your fingertips against his palm, a barrier is manifested between the two of you. “Woah, there’s like.. a wall between us.”

“It’s infinity.”

You look up at him, even more in awe, “So it’s science, right? That makes it easy to explain then, huh? I thought it was way more complicated than that.” You’re too engrossed in repeatedly retracting your hand and pressing it back against this “barrier” to notice how Gojo’s expression shifts.

He pulls his hand back as if he’d been burnt and you blink, swiftly putting your own hand back by your side. A frown plagues your lips. You figure you did get a bit carried away, it was really nice to see a cursed technique at play for the first time ever. And you’re glad it was something as magnificent as that. You got excited, forgetting boundaries.

Before you can express your gratitude and apologize, Gojo is striding off once more. You notice this time he’s walking a bit faster, as if he intends on leaving you behind. Your brows knit as you sigh. You don’t jog up to him this time, letting the distance between you increase. You’re always taught not to be greedy. Occurrences like this coming into play to drill that in your head, yet you fail every time — constantly wanting more.

You enter the classroom a bit after Gojo, already seeing him with a big beam on his face as he rambles off with Geto. He’s mad at you again, you think. This is normal for you — people being upset with you. It shouldn’t hurt, but it does. You try your hardest to pretend it doesn’t.

Shoko’s not here yet, unfortunately. You see two empty seats and assume the vacant one by Geto is Shoko’s, so you take the other seat. You aren’t sure what to do with this extra time, you shouldn’t have come so early, so you settle with fiddling with your fingers and looking out the window.

You hear Geto’s voice and you’re not sure if you’re being looked at, but you’re way too nervous to check, afraid that if you looked you’d be caught.

“Ogawa.”

It isn’t until a full minute later you realize that Geto was trying to get your attention the entire time. You finally look at him, the curiosity brimming in your chest and the urge to look back finally sated. His smile is kind and soft. He pats the empty seat beside him. “Why don’t you sit?”

You jolt.

“Isn’t that Shoko’s seat?” You point nervously, trying to find a way out of this. If conversation is what Geto is looking for, you’re the last person that can provide.

Gojo scoffs and you retreat into yourself, eyes averted.

You faintly hear Geto shove Gojo and tell him to shut up over the loud pounding of your heartbeat before he’s turning back to you, that same, already familiar smile plastered on his lips. “I’m sure she won’t mind.”

“You.. really want me to sit by you?” You ask, hopefully. You guess you still have yet to learn and expect disappointment. Geto nods, his smile getting brighter and you glow like the stars.

You stand meekly, shuffling into the seat as quietly as you could, cringing when the metal cried loudly against the tile floor. Geto huffs in satisfaction and your shoulders relax a bit. You wish Gojo weren’t here to stare the both of you down, you feel somewhat uncomfortable by his overwhelming presence. You have an inkling that disturbing you is his goal, for a small smirk paints his lips.

Geto’s voice is soft as he speaks to you. He’s asking you about yourself and you answer somewhat vaguely, unsure of how to go about talking to him. You stammer a bit, trying to find your words. You get a bit fidgety, afraid he might get irritated with you, but he’s as patient as ever, smiling as he awaits your answer. That’s when you relax completely, finding it easier to answer him in stride. You never knew Geto could be so easy to talk to. You’re starting to like him even more. It’s hard not to favor people who are nice to you. But you can’t get ahead of yourself. You have to learn to expect disappointment so you won’t be disappointed.

Gojo doesn’t say a word, staring at the two of you converse so easily. He doesn’t understand why Geto seems so interested in getting to know you. You’re boring, you don’t even know your technique for crying out loud. Weak people piss Gojo off.

Gojo walks by you as you hold your head in your hands, leaning against your dorm door. He’s confused, are you going through something? You look stupid, and he withholds the urge not to laugh at your expense. If Geto were here he’d definitely scold him. He thinks of that and the nagging Geto would put him through. He rolls his eyes and decides to approach.

“Yo. You look like an idiot doing that.”

Well he didn’t actually mean for it to come across that way, but sometimes his mouth likes to run before his brain liked to function.

You look up at him, tears brimming your lashes. The sight makes him sigh internally. If he knew you’d be crying he would’ve avoided you altogether. Comforting you is beyond his expertise. Well.. it’s not. He’d just rather not waste his time.

He asks if you were going through it. Another moment of his mouth moving before his brain. But you don’t seem to take offense, more like you just seem a bit embarrassed at being caught nearly crying.

“Hate to interrupt whatever’s goin’ on, but class is in thirty minutes. If you’re anything like Suguru you’re an early bird, right?”

You answer meekly, wiping your tears with your sleeve. He catches himself eyeing your attire behind his glasses. He’s staring at you and he’s positive you can tell, for your head tips towards the floor. You seem to be awaiting his departure, but he stays rooted to the floor, content on tormenting you this way.

“Are you heading to class right now?”

He never expected you to be the type to start a conversation, not with him especially. He noticed how uneasy you felt around him. But he cuts you some slack and answers.

“I don’t usually go early, that’s Suguru’s thing. But I guess todays an exception. Anyways what’re you doing out here, and what was with the gripping your head thing? Going through a phase?” He answers you and throws a barrage of questions coyly.

You blink. Gojo realizes how much left his mouth at once and pushes up his glasses. You come up with a sorry answer and Gojo decides he’s wasted enough time. If he got there now he could talk to Suguru about yesterday’s conversation with the higher ups before Yaga arrives. He starts to walk off, now considering the conversation boring.

Your voice interrupts his stride, you sound somewhat panicked and he contemplates hearing you out. You must’ve taken his stillness as a cue.

“Do we need any particular supplies for class, by any chance?”

You sound anxious, and he doesn’t even have to look to know you’re shuffling your feet.

“We take notes every now and then, by we I don’t mean me, so a notebook would be nice but isn’t required, and you don’t look like you have one with you.” He shoves his hands in his pockets, and turns to face you. He was correct, this time you’re fiddling with your ridiculously long skirt.

“Let’s hope you have a good memory. Sensei likes to run his mouth.” The only entertaining thing about you is the expressions you make. And he isn’t disappointed with this one either. He doesn’t know why he finds your sorrow so comedic but this time he can’t hold back his laugh. If Geto knew about this or witnessed it, he’d definitely scold him, but Gojo doesn’t care at the moment, shoulders shaking as he cackled obnoxiously.

He sighs, wiping under his eyes, lifting his glasses a little. He thinks that’s enough for now, and prepares to walk off to class. But then you ask a question that makes him freeze, “Can I walk to class with you?”

“Huh?”

He raises a brow, he knows you can’t see it, but he’s looking at you as if you’re crazy.

You instantly wave your hands in panic, trying to explain yourself, he thinks your excuse is lame. “Sorry. It’s just I don’t remember the way, and if you’re on your way there I thought maybe I can tag along. Though, it’s okay if you say no.”

He’s extremely annoyed with you now, watching you fidget and shuffle about with a frown plaguing his lips. A rejection is already sitting on his tongue, ready to be fired, but he knows how disappointed Geto might be with him, so his shoulders drop.

“Whatever. Do what you want.”

He watches you instantly glow. You’re not smiling but he can tell you’re happy. It’s the first time he’s seeing an expression that isn’t filled with some type of despair on you. He thinks he prefers your anguish.

“I promise not to be annoying.”

He rolls his eyes, picking up his pace.

“You’re already being annoying by saying that.”

“Sorry!”

“Stop apologizing.”

You say sorry again and he scoffs to himself. Could you get any more annoying? He can hear your hurried footsteps as you try to match his stride, he feels a bit bad and slows down a bit, letting the two of you walk side by side. He did it to be nice, but it’s a decision he instantly regrets. Did your parents ever teach you that staring was impolite? The burning of your eyes against the side of his face pisses him off. But he tries his hardest not to show his anger on his face because of your intense stare.

He can’t help the twitch of his facade and he thinks you noticed. He’s resisting the urge to meet your stare, glare you down and watch you shuffle like you usually do. He craves to make you uncomfortable and show you who’s really stronger between the two of you. He really can’t comprehend where these hostile emotions are coming from but he also doesn’t care to dig deep and figure it out. It’ll come to him eventually. So for now he’ll get a bit excited as you ask about his cursed technique, jumping at the opportunity to show you how strong he is.

You’re in awe and his ego instantly skyrockets. You press your hand against his infinity over and over again, an intrigued gleam in your eyes as your lips part in a gasp.

“So it’s science, right? That makes it easy to explain then, huh? I thought it was way more complicated than that.”

For some reason that makes him irritated. “Easy to explain.” Funny coming from someone who had no idea what cursed techniques were barely twenty-four hours before. He pulls his hand away from you, as if he was burnt and instantly walks off. He thanks his long legs and their advantage to gain distance from you.

He resists the urge to turn and see your expression.

He originally did it all with Geto in mind; mulling over how he would feel if he’d left you deserted in that hallway, nervous eyes and shaky hands as you tried to find your way. Curse Geto for being such a heavy influence on him, because now he wished he’d never encountered you. Gojo considers his day already ruined before it barely started.

Now he sits and watches you converse with his best friend as if he was your best friend. Geto was always the friendly, welcoming type, so he can’t fathom why it irks him so. But it has to be your fault somehow, so until he figures that out he decides to brood in silence, arms crossed.

Shoko enters and your attention is instantly diverted. One of the many times Gojo is grateful for her existence. You were more comfortable with her than the other two. Probably a girls thing. Gojo didn’t care to understand. He instantly decided anything that had something to do with you would be ignored to the best of his abilities.

You greet Shoko in a quiet voice, as if cautious, and instantly brighten when she sends you a soft smile and a greeting in return. She points to her spot and looks at Geto inquisitively, hovering behind you. He just shrugs with a sheepish smile. So she simply sits and scoots her chair closer to you, waving her hand in a shooing motion towards Geto, “It’s my turn to hog her, your boyfriend looks upset, go comfort him.”

Geto’s head whips towards Gojo instantly, seeing his pouty expression with his arms crossed. He sighs in exasperation, a fond smile painting his lips.

You watch the two of them for a second or more before looking at Shoko. You didn’t know they were dating..

Shoko chuckles, and speaks up as if she read your mind, “They’re not actually dating. Yet, anyways. They love dancing in circles around each other. It’s irritating to witness. Utahime is a grade above me so unfortunately she doesn’t suffer through it as much as me.” She nudges you, her eyes crinkling as her smile stretches a bit wider, “You’re here with me now though, so we can suffer it together, kay?”

You nod eagerly, as if it was meant to be a good thing. Suffering anything is manageable if someone as kind as Shoko is there with you. You need to get her a gift for her kindness. Such a wonderful girl!

Yaga enters the room about twenty minutes later. Shoko lets you borrow a notebook of hers and you instantly get to jotting things down. You’re a bit surprised when you notice how mundane these subjects are. But it makes sense, you’re all still teenagers after all. You’d probably see it as inhumane if all this school taught to their students was jujutsu. No matter the importance of sorcerers and preserving the lives of non-sorcerers, it was always good to live life at least a little normally, to you anyways.

Time passed with you trying to avoid answering questions as much as possible. Even though you hated doing it, you also couldn’t help it. Whenever Yaga looked your way your eyes flew to your paper and you instantly got to acting busy to avoid getting picked on. Plus, it wasn’t like you needed to… Geto was there to answer every question smoothly for the rest of you, so there was no need, right?

Though you suppose it wasn’t evadable forever.

“[Name], can you answer this one?”

You jolt, looking up from your paper where you were “writing” (you just hovered the pen over the paper and moved it about). It was an easy algebra question, so you answered it with ease, albeit quietly. Yaga hummed in approval and moved on. It wasn’t all that bad, you recognize, but the attention is still unnerving.

Shoko nudges your side, “I got a smart girl on my radar it looks like,” she whispers. “You’ll let me copy your notes, right?” She jokes.

You nod instantly, the premise of the joke flying straight over your head. If it’ll keep her around you’ll write her as many notes as need be, you thought. It was the least you could do to repay her kindness!

She giggles quietly, and her laugh was instantly a melody you became enamored with. “I was joking, don’t worry. But you seem smart, born a genius like a certain someone, I presume?” She says coyly and her eyes drift to a particular person one seat down. You force your eyes not to drift in the direction of her finger.

“I usually study in my free time,” You shut down her assumption, you were nowhere near born a genius. “Guess you can say it’s a hobby of mine,” you shrug, whispering alongside her. It was nice, it felt like the two of you were sharing secrets.

“A hobby?” She laughs, shocked and intrigued. “You get more odd by the second.”

Your expression shifts, something she doesn’t hesitate to spot. She lays a hand on your shoulder and rubs it assuringly as she whispers, “No sweat, it’s a good thing. To me, at least. I don’t think I’d be friends with those two idiots otherwise.”

Your face relaxes and she smiles.

“Shoko,” you suddenly speak, surprising the both of you — you the most. Her eyes flit to your own and she sits, awaiting. “Do you like sweet things?” You ask, cupping your hand around your mouth as if that’ll make you any quieter.

Shoko entertains you with a grin and replicates you, hand cupped around her mouth as she leans close to whisper. Her eyes drift over you — if checking you out, something that escapes your notice — before she answers, “I love sweet stuff.”

You seem satisfied with her answer so she shifts her attention back to her notebook. Yaga turns around and her eyes flit between her notes and the board, pretending to be immersed. Though you don’t think she has anyone fooled. You glance at her for a moment more before you do the same and settle for doodling on the empty parts of your notes. Small doodles of Shoko and Geto holding gifts with big smiles on their faces. You subconsciously grin into your hand. You have no clue what either of them prefer but the thought is nice… Maybe you can ask later. Hopefully Geto will have a moment where Gojo isn’t hanging off of him.

You discreetly shuffle your position so you feel comfortable enough to gaze at him. He looks extremely focused, brows slightly furrowed as he taps his pen lightly against the desk, as if afraid to disturb the silent classroom. Your eyes drift a bit to catch a glimpse of his counterpart. A scoff of bewilderment almost involuntarily leaves your lips at the sight of Gojo simply trying to balance a pencil between his nose and the peak of his lip. Even though you have a sudden urge to call him out on his stupidity, this is actually the perfect opportunity to ask what you wanted from Geto without his leering glare, he seems distracted enough.

Yaga is turned towards the board too, voice booming loud enough that if you whispered, he wouldn’t be able to hear you over the sound of himself. It’s insane that you feel so nervous, as if speaking to a classmate during teaching is some sort of crime. But you recall the small doodle of him smiling happily with his gift and persevere.

A small, soft tap breaks Geto out of his reverie. His eyes blink in surprise before his gaze lands on you and your meek, almost guilty expression.

“Do you like sweet stuff?” Your soft voice whispers and he almost laughs aloud. You’re a horrible whisperer, and you’re both extremely lucky that Yaga’s voice echoes, for no one hears you.

He ponders your question for a moment, eyes drifting around your face before they settle back on your eyes. He’s grinning as he says, “Yeah. I like sweet stuff.”

Your visage glows with hope as you turn back to your paper, beaming. Geto’s smile becomes soft.

Brownies it is.

all mine taglist : @kaelisian @tamajoyaki @unsavedandsad @friedstudentflapranch @bomjug @mygarlingelena @phoenix666stuff @mel-star636 @gloobermoober @kallykissr @aichiomei @jaerang @luv-gin @ploylulla @mrowwww @ladytamayolover @tatiishere @kasumitenbaz @autumn-slaves @someoneunknownforyou @rosemary394 @armani78 @lordbugs @decadenthumanalienranch-blog @sokivv @crushed-l1ttle-stars @ichiikoari @okayiamkassandra @cole-silas @kakuchosbff @sugasweettea @suguguro @lacm-ac @irenesolos @redskull199987 @loreleis-world-blog @aleirnebulous @asweetblueberry2 @thel0v3hashira143 @prettypei @astral-hydromancy @ran6ia IM SO SORRY FOR THOSE WHO COULDN’T BE PROPERLY TAGGED!!! there’s a shit ton of u so maybe i got some of ur users wrong or i just can’t tag u, if ur one of those ppl plsss let me know so i can fix it. this taglist long asf!!!!!!

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killsatoru · 9 months ago

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Part One : Mistakes With Rings : Gojo Satoru

Pairing : Gojo Satoru x fem! reader

Warning(s) : Cursing, reader is a Itadori

Summary : Thrown into a loveless marriage, but what happens when your husband asks you for an open marriage?

“Let’s have an open marriage.”

Those words were enough to crumble the bricks we have built, though maybe those bricks were just me.

he didn’t bother to add the paste between to keep the wall together.

he created his own leaving me to finish ours myself.

I let out a shaky breath. one i didn’t realize i was holding, his icy blue eyes looking into mine. demanding for me to free him from the shackles of our loveless marriage.

“Okay, if that is what you want.”

Was I really allowed to say no? We were both thrown into this marriage because of our parents, there was no love involved, no relationship, no connection, no butterflies, heart eyes, honeymoon phase, sparks.

nothing.

absolutely nothing.

We were friends back when we were young.

a little boy that with a snap of his finger had everyone to their knees, singing him praises, wrapped gifts with luxurious items, that he would sigh and throw them to the side not taking into account their value.

Spoiled to the very core.

little Gojo Satoru has never heard the word “No” from anyone else but himself.

except from me

“You’ll marry me eventually” face covered in cake, one that he had requested

“No I won’t. I don't plan on getting married.” a frown playing on my childish features

“why not? you’ll die all alone!” Stuffing more cake into his face, hopefully he brushes his teeth.

“So be it, I prefer that rather than a loveless marriage.”

At such a young age I wasn't meant to already have those negative views on marriage. but when it came to him. I would have those ill feelings towards marriage.

To think it is now a nightmare i have to wake up to everyday.

“Y/N Itadori, you are to marry Gojo Satoru.” A stern voice echoes through the walls. leaving no space to deny the demand that was just told.

leaving the room, with a heavy weight on my shoulder. please let this be a nightmare I wince, ‘where did I go wrong?’ tears threatening to spill out, those same words juggling through my head…

“Y/N! Are you alright? what did they say?”

Looking up to see my brother Jin, only 2 years older than me looking at me with confusion and concern.

“I’m getting married…”

“You may now kiss the bride!”

The room was spinning. The man that I have done everything in my power to avoid ever wearing the same ring. To avoid a marriage that only benefited others, to avoid this twisted joke that whoever was above played on me, to avoid ever being in a loveless marriage.

he inched closer. His scent is so strong, so unbearable. He's hesitating.

‘Just get it over with’

Pulling him closer catching him off guard. Sealing our lips in a kiss.

A honeymoon should never feel this empty.

To avoid being stuck in the same room as him, I took a long stroll through the beach, the soft waves soothing me into my memories.

memories flooding in of when we were 15.

“GOJO SATORU! I'M GOING TO WRANGLE YOUR NECK!”

“HELP GUYS! SHE'S INSANE!”

Laughing

Watching from the table Gojo’s and Utahime’s banter

“So Y/N~ got anyone you like!” Shoko wiggles her eyebrows at me

giggling “Nah you know i have no plans of that anytime soon.”

“you let out a cute giggle though there must be someone~” poking my cheek now

“leave her alone Shoko, it’s probably Satoru~”

“You two are seriously impossible”

“Come onnnn~ you can tell ussss~” both giving me puppy dog eyes

“No. I don’t. And no I won't.”

“Y/N PLEASE SAVE ME PLEASE!”

jumping towards me hugging me tightly, a light blush coating my cheeks

“GOJO!! LET GO OF Y/N!”

“NO! Y/N PLEASE DON'T LET ME GO!”

hugging him back, smiling warmly at him.

psh he wishes pushing him towards Utahime

“he’s all yours Utahime!”

“Y/NNN HOW COULDDD YOUUUU WE’LL NEVER BE ABLE TO HAVE KIDSSS SHES GONNA CUT MY BALLLLLLS!”

“He’s seriously delusional.” Dusting off where he was just squeezing me

“You saw that right, Shoko?”

“Sure did!”

now smiling wickedly at me

“You sooooo like him~”

“I can never win, can i.”

I have always liked him. but it was one sided i could never truly admit it.

I pushed those feelings away, labeling them puppy love. nothing more. nothing less.

being brought back to reality. The cold beach air was biting at my skin causing my hairs to stand up, and also the thought of sharing the same room and bed with him.

“I got myself another room. we don’t have to share”

“Sure. Goodnight Gojo.”

This marriage is gonna go to shit.

Slipping into the cold covers. Honeymoons were meant to be filled with love and passion. A celebration of becoming one.

This was just the beginning.

This is another concept that was brewing up for a little while! Honestly not super proud of my writing for this one but it’s a little more thoughtout unlike Indigo. Thank you guys for reading!

#killsatoru!#gojo satoru #gojo x reader #gojou satoru x reader #gojo smut #jjk gojo #jujustsu kaisen x reader #gojo x y/n #jujutsu gojo #eventual smut

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linkhundr · 4 months ago

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So NFTgate has now hit tumblr - I made a thread about it on my twitter, but I'll talk a bit more about it here as well in slightly more detail. It'll be a long one, sorry! Using my degree for something here. This is not intended to sway you in one way or the other - merely to inform so you can make your own decision and so that you aware of this because it will happen again, with many other artists you know.

Let's start at the basics: NFT stands for 'non fungible token', which you should read as 'passcode you can't replicate'. These codes are stored in blocks in what is essentially a huge ledger of records, all chained together - a blockchain. Blockchain is encoded in such a way that you can't edit one block without editing the whole chain, meaning that when the data is validated it comes back 'negative' if it has been tampered with. This makes it a really, really safe method of storing data, and managing access to said data. For example, verifying that a bank account belongs to the person that says that is their bank account.

For most people, the association with NFT's is bitcoin and Bored Ape, and that's honestly fair. The way that used to work - and why it was such a scam - is that you essentially purchased a receipt that said you owned digital space - not the digital space itself. That receipt was the NFT. So, in reality, you did not own any goods, that receipt had no legal grounds, and its value was completely made up and not based on anything. On top of that, these NFTs were purchased almost exclusively with cryptocurrency which at the time used a verifiation method called proof of work, which is terrible for the environment because it requires insane amounts of electricity and computing power to verify. The carbon footprint for NFTs and coins at this time was absolutely insane.

In short, Bored Apes were just a huge tech fad with the intention to make a huge profit regardless of the cost, which resulted in the large market crash late last year. NFTs in this form are without value.

However, NFTs are just tech by itself more than they are some company that uses them. NFTs do have real-life, useful applications, particularly in data storage and verification. Research is being done to see if we can use blockchain to safely store patient data, or use it for bank wire transfers of extremely large amounts. That's cool stuff!

So what exactly is Käärijä doing? Kä is not selling NFTs in the traditional way you might have become familiar with. In this use-case, the NFT is in essence a software key that gives you access to a digital space. For the raffle, the NFT was basically your ticket number. This is a very secure way of doing so, assuring individuality, but also that no one can replicate that code and win through a false method. You are paying for a legimate product - the NFT is your access to that product.

What about the environmental impact in this case? We've thankfully made leaps and bounds in advancing the tech to reduce the carbon footprint as well as general mitigations to avoid expanding it over time. One big thing is shifting from proof of work verification to proof of space or proof of stake verifications, both of which require much less power in order to work. It seems that Kollekt is partnered with Polygon, a company that offers blockchain technology with the intention to become climate positive as soon as possible. Numbers on their site are very promising, they appear to be using proof of stake verification, and all-around appear more interested in the tech than the profits it could offer.

But most importantly: Kollekt does not allow for purchases made with cryptocurrency, and that is the real pisser from an environmental perspective. Cryptocurrency purchases require the most active verification across systems in order to go through - this is what bitcoin mining is, essentially. The fact that this website does not use it means good things in terms of carbon footprint.

But why not use something like Patreon? I can't tell you. My guess is that Patreon is a monthly recurring service and they wanted something one-time. Kollekt is based in Helsinki, and word is that Mikke (who is running this) is friends with folks on the team. These are all contributing factors, I would assume, but that's entirely an assumption and you can't take for fact.

Is this a good thing/bad thing? That I also can't tell you - you have to decide that for yourself. It's not a scam, it's not crypto, just a service that sits on the blockchain. But it does have higher carbon output than a lot of other services do, and its exact nature is not publicly disclosed. This isn't intended to sway you to say one or the other, but merely to give you the proper understanding of what NFTs are as a whole and what they are in this particular case so you can make that decision for yourself.

#käärijä #whew its a long one sorry #but hopefully useful #and intended entirely to inform

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biancadoes1 · 2 months ago

Note

I feel like some in the fandom might benefit from my shipping philosophy.

Are you feeling stressed out over any little bits we get from the mains or secondary characters that you can't neatly fit into your desired shipping outcome?

If so, I invite you to have a seat, so to speak, and read what I have to write.

Have you heard of schrodinger's cat? In layperson's terms: if something is unknown and cannot be analyzed, then all possibilities exist at the same time, until it is observed. Feel free to look it up if you want to go deeper, it's just a metaphor here though.

Stick with me, I know we already got weird.

The way I apply this to shipping is simply: we don't actually know anything in regard to the question of current romance between Nicola & Luke. That is the prime thing I always cling to.

Any picture, any quote, any rumor, any think piece (yup, including mine)... is not actually an observation of what we are shipping. It's just us knocking on the box that the answer (are N & L together or not?) is in.

And in this case, it's like we are mapping out the shape, size, color, weight, smell, even taste of the box. We are essentially kids trying to figure out our mystery gift under an xmas tree.

But... we will not know for certain unless Nicola & Luke open the box. Until that moment, everything is supposition and theory.

It does no one any good to be upset over unproven theories. Why make yourself ill over one photo that shows one second out of a whole year or more? Why are you letting someone else tell you what you "must accept" when it's still just a theory? Why let uncertain things affect you negatively?

If you allow yourself to accept that we don't actually know anything, that nothing we see is actual proof of what is in that box, then you will see that each new tidbit is just another way to figure out what the box is like.

That doesn't mean you have to say every single idea is equally likely though. You can still think some things are more likely than others. You can use logic and research to decide how likely or unlikely you feel something is. When you start to do this, and limit the direct influences of other people's opinions before formulating your own, you will feel less like a yoyo being yanked around.

It's a very even keeled experience, tbh. Join me?

This is advice some of you should really take.

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anonymousredactedconfessions · 5 months ago

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Let's have a talk, shall we?

Major Trigger Warning for rape, false accusations, and mentions of child sex crimes

I let you guys get away with a lot of shit. I let you be a little bitter, or mean spirited, or pissed off. I let you guys vent and let out grievances and complain for the sake of complaining. And i do all of this because it is important to have a space that you can do so without fear of judgement, it is unhealthy for you to bottle up negative emotions. I provide this in a public space because with the way this fandom is, if I didn't many of you would be pressured into not doing so at all. This fandom has a habit of ostracizing those who have differing opinions and interpretations, those who wish to critique the art they consume, those who have unpopular opinions, and all of it is done with the utmost aggression and vitriol. The things that have been said to some of the people in this fandom genuinely makes me lose faith in humanity if i think about it too hard.

This blog exists explicitly to counteract that. I refuse to encourage or enable it. What you are doing is actively dangerous, and I won't be having it in the space I curate within this fandom.

If you haven't noticed, this is one of my rules:

It means that you are not allowed to come in my inbox and accuse people of serious harm over this fiction.

You will not come and accuse people of something as egregious as rape apologia in my inbox. You will not accuse people of rape, abuse, assault, or child abuse/rape/exploitation in my inbox.

These are serious real world issues, and the reason they are bad is because they cause direct harm to real living people who can feel pain and can be violated. Your disgust holds absolutely no ethical weight. At All. You should have the mental, emotional, and intellectual capability to understand the ethical difference between allegories for rape, stories with/about rape, erotica of rape, and actual real life people being raped. Making accusations of this weight over make believe is abhorrent, and as a matter of fact, it shows that you don't treat these tragedies with the weight or gravity that they deserve. If you believe that it is appropriate to accuse someone of violating another person like so because of the creation of or opinions about art, then you have some serious learning and growing to do as a person if you wish to navigate these topics with any level of maturity or respect towards victims.

There is no good that comes out of accusations such as these. They only ever serve to:

Demonstrate to victims that the tragedy of their abuse is as trivial as fanfiction/art that you deem nasty (but is ultimately ethical), or even something as inconsequential as someones' love for a fictional character.

Shame those who love these characters, or this art, or creating, into hiding their opinions for fear of harassment and serious accusations when they have done zero harm by enjoying it.

Stifle creation and participation in fandoms.

Limit the spread of ideas, interpretations, critique/criticism, and general opinions in the fandom, which just turns fandoms into boring echo chambers devoid of variety and creativity.

Encourage actual censorship and moral policing. (More on that on this reblog by @escapedaudios on a post of mine. Thank you Escaped for your two cents, they are much appreciated 💖)

Spread the incredibly harmful idea that people are defined by the art they enjoy. You cannot accurately judge a person’s values or morals based on what tropes and themes they enjoy in fiction. You create an environment and culture incredibly dangerous for vulnerable individuals (like minors) when you tell them that they can know who is safe to trust based on whether they consume "the good kind" or "the bad kind" of fiction. This makes it so very easy for predators to virtue signal about fiction to lure in potential victims to abuse.

The majority of you are very good and well behaved when it comes to this, but the amount of people i have had come into my inbox and accuse others of being rapists with no evidence other than "they made X" or "they like Y" is not zero. And i will not be satisfied until it is.

This is all i have to say about the subject.

#the priest speaks #redacted asmr #redacted audio #I will see you all when i return

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remcycl333 · 2 years ago

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STATES FAQ

the most frequently asked questions about states and the law of assumption, all in one place!

Q: is states a method?

A: no! states is not a method. you can't decide that you don't want to use states, because you are always in a state no matter what!

Q: what do i do if i can't imagine?

A: everyone can imagine!! imagination ≠ visualization. even if you have aphantasia (like me) and can't see images in your mind, you can still imagine! you can imagine in words, sounds, feelings, even smells!

imagination: the faculty or action of forming new ideas, or images or concepts of external objects not present to the senses.

Q: how do you "feel it to be real"?

A: think about how it would feel to have your desire! maybe you'd feel calm, relief, excitement, contentedness, peace, etc. this is the feeling you're looking for. now, whenever you do methods, such as visualization, affirming, scripting, etc, your goal is to conjure this feeling! that is how you feel it real: you feel how you'd feel if you already had it.

note: you don't have to feel it real every single time you enter the state of the wish fulfilled!

Q: what if I have a lot of desires I want to fulfill at once? do I imagine all of them being in the wish fulfilled state or should I focus on one after another? I am also worried since I don't really remember all of my desires by heart.

A: i'm sure we're all familiar with the idea of blanket affirmations such as "i have everything i want." it's just like that! embody the state of being someone who has everything they want, or the state of having your dream life!

your subconscious is super smart, so it remembers every one of your desires even if your conscious mind doesn't! if you want to write a list of all your desires down, you can do that! or you can script a scene that implies you have all of these desires if that's a method you'd prefer! if you want to focus on them separately, you can do that too!

every time you've noticed you've fallen out of the state of having everything you want (negative thoughts are indicators of that) shift back to your desired state!

Q: how long should it take on average to receive your desire in the 3d after your state has changed?

A: as soon as the state of the wish fulfilled becomes your dwelling state, it will manifest into your 3d! sadly there's no set time on how long it takes for a state to become your dwelling state. it depends on you! to make sure your desired state becomes your dwelling state as fast as possible, make sure you're returning to your desired state every time you notice you've fallen out of it!

Q: how do you know if you're in sabbath/what is sabbath?

A: being in the sabbath state basically just means that you know your desire is yours and you've accepted it as a FACT that its yours! and now you don't feel the need to do anything to get it bc you know you already have it. or for some people you feel like you don't even want your desire anymore, even though you know you do!

it's kinda like when you want a new phone really bad, and then once you get it, after a while it just feels normal for you to have it. you no longer want it really badly, because you already have it. even though you still love your phone and are happy you have it, you're used to it! you don't feel like you need to do anything to get this phone anymore, because it's already yours! that's basically what the sabbath state feels like!

Q: how do i get over the feeling that i have to monitor my every thought?

A: i went through this too! what really helped me was allowing myself to think of other things. so whenever i'd doubt or begin to overthink, i'd just reassure myself i already had my desire and there was nothing i needed to do, and then make myself think of something else. monitoring my thoughts had become a habit, so i broke it by allowing (even forcing) myself to think of other things!

Q: tips on doubts/overthinking?

A: what helps me the most is to remind myself that my desire is already mine in the 4D, no matter what thoughts pop up in my conscious mind. your thoughts don't manifest, so your doubts won't manifest either unless you dwell in them.

something else i've always done--which might be a little unconventional idk--is tell myself that the only reason im having doubts or overthinking is because im sooo close to manifesting my desire and my conscious mind knows that and is trying to sabotage me. is this actually what's happening? prob not but i just tell myself it is (thoughts don't manifest so it doesn't matter if i think this) and let it the idea motivate me to get back on track. you don't have to do this, but i am very used to the idea of self-sabotaging myself, so by explaining it to myself like this makes it easier for me to continue persisting,

also, don't expect to be perfect at manifesting right away! the more you continue to go back to the state of the wish fulfilled, the easier and easier it will get. you will notice less and less doubts pop up! don't let the fact that you get doubts prevent you from trying! it;s like learning how to ride a bike: you fall off every other second whenever you start, but with time and practice, you start to be able to stay on the bike longer and longer. eventually, it's smooth sailing and you never fall!! but if you had given up the first few times you fell off, you wouldn't have gotten to the good part!

Q: how do I know if I am stuck in the state of lack?

A: you're never stuck in any state, that state is just your dwelling state. and you know the state of lack is your dwelling state because the thoughts that naturally enter your day about your desire are negative! you can easily shift to another state, you're not stuck in any one state!

Q: do i have to visualize?

A: nope! visualization is simply a method. it's not a requirement at all!

Q: what is the difference between dominant thoughts and states?

A: the definition of the law of assumption if you look it up on google: The Law of Assumption is a means of manifesting desires by having a state of mind and the feeling that those desires, wishes, and aspirations have been fulfilled. Neville Goddard (who introduced this law), explains that achieving the desired goal has everything to do with your state of mind rather than mere action.

the definition of the law of attraction on google: The law of attraction is a philosophy suggesting that positive thoughts bring positive results into a person's life, while negative thoughts bring negative outcomes.

in the law of assumption, your state is what manifests. it's what Neville has always taught. once again, let's revisit this Neville quote: “You do not command things to appear by your words or loud affirmations. Such vain repetition is more often than not confirmation of the opposite. Decreeing is ever done in consciousness. That is; every man is conscious of being that which he has decreed himself to be.”

basically, you can repeat an affirmation (or thought) five thousand times a day, but if you haven't changed your dwelling state, it's not going to matter.

affirmations are for your conscious mind. your subconscious responds to feeling, not to thoughts or images or actions. you can repeat affirmations to help soothe yourself and assure yourself you have your desire. and you can also use them to create the feeling of the wish fulfilled within yourself. you can use all methods to create this feeling. they're not what gets you into the state, but they can help you maintain the state.

Q: is state another name for feeling of wish fulfilled? and if it is, why is it called states now because Neville has literally sworn by the fact that all one need to manifest desires is the feeling of wish fulfilled?

A: Neville has always said you need to get into the STATE of mind of someone who already has your desire. aka the STATE of the WISH FULFILLED. the wish fulfilled is a state, just like there's a state of lack. when you have the feeling of the wish fulfilled, you are in the state of the wish fulfilled. and this will manifest once it becomes your dwelling state

Q: how is ignoring an opposing the thought the same as shifting back to TSOTWF?

A: as i've described in my posts about states, you enter a state by intention. so if you notice an opposing thought pop up and you decide to ignore it bc it's not what u want, you are intending to shift back to the state where you do have your desire. you are ignoring that thought because you don't want to identify with it, and the reason you don't identify with it is because you want to opposite of it. so intention can really be as small and simple as that!

Q: is it normal that at first i can't hold the state for a long time?

A: yeah! don't force yourself to hold the state for long periods of time, it's not necessary! it's really about which state you go back to the most frequently, not how long you can hold a state!

Q: when i enter my desired state, i don't naturally have thoughts that i have my desire. does that mean i'm not in the state?

A: don't expect to start naturally having thoughts from the state of the wish fulfilled when you just start manifesting something! the more you shift to your desired state throughout the day, the easier it will get and the longer you will stay in the state. as your desired state becomes your dwelling state, that's when you'll start naturally having thoughts that you would if you already had your desire.

Q: when i shift back to my desired state by reminding myself that i have my desire, i DO NOT feel anything. Is this ok?

A: yeah! when i shift back to my desired state throughout the day, if im in the middle of doing something, i don't feel anything at all! i focus more on the feeling of knowing while im doing methods, to ensure im doing them not to get my desire, but to experience already have it in my 4d! but when you're just quickly shifting yourself back to the state of the wish fulfilled while you're busy doing something else, it's not necessary to feel anything!

Q: how to remain in a state despite 3d showing unwanted reality?

A: it is okay to fall out of the state! you don't have to get into a state and then stay in it until it manifests in order for it to become your dwelling state! you make the state of the wish fulfilled your dwelling state by going back to it more times than you go back to the state of lack. so if something in your 3d make you fall out of the state, that's okay, just shift back into it! don't feel pressure to be in the state 24/7!

Q: how to know if you're truly fulfilled or just in a good mood but still in a “lack” state?

A: your state creates your thoughts, so if you're still in the state of lack, you will have opposing thoughts about your desire! you wouldn't be able to have "good" thoughts about your desire if you weren't in the state of the wish fulfilled!

Q: how to consistently satisfy the inner man without seeing it as a step to manifest something into your 3d?

A: don't force yourself to do a method you don't want to do! don't force yourself to visualize the same scene someone else even though it doesn't create any feeling of knowing inside of you and feels like a chore to you. don't repeat affirmations if you don't want to and don't repeat an aff you don't resonate with. do what you think is fun! and do what feels natural to you! by taking the pressure of being perfect off yourself, it's easier to imagine in order to experience, rather than to get it in your 3d.

also if you're just not in the mood to imagine or do a method, don't do it! fulfilling yourself can be as simple as shifting into the state and then going on with your day!

Q: how do i fulfill my imagination without feeling delusional?

A: remember that you can do or be absolutely anything in your imagination! you don't have think that what you see in your 4d is happening right now in your 3d! you just have to know its happening in your 4d, and it clearly is because you are imagining it! your 3d will reflect your 4d, but you don't have to focus on that fact while imagining! imagine to experience, not to get. your imagination is your safe space, you can have anything you want in there, and it's not delusional to imagine yourself as someone who has what you want!

you might be putting too much pressure on imagining, when really it should be fun and natural. remember, your imagining to feel as though your inner man already has it, not to manifest it into your outer world (even though it will naturally do that on its own)!

Q: is it really possible to manifest anything you want?

A: yup! your imagination creates your reality, so if you can imagine something, you can manifest it into your reality!

#states

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