#just an extra layer of seasonal depression on top of your constant year round depression thx

[unproduciblesmackdown]

i just for the first time saw something yesterday saying in general the month of april is miserable for ppls despressen & im like man just last week i was theorizing how the onset of spring generally seems to make me feel even crappier than usual abt being alive b/c for the past few years when i was drawing semi regularly, even with the different Rates at which i drew over the yrs theres a noticeable trend where i’d tend to stop drawing in april for basically about a month. like i’d put together a The Year In Drawings collection and have nothing for april, like twice in a row...last year i could pretend the gap wasn’t there coz the Month i didnt wanna draw fell on mid-april to mid-may, i think. the year before was unusual and didnt have the month pause. this year also breaks the trend apparently, probably in part b/c last years frustration w drawing made me decide to try to care less abt the things that frustrated me and apparently i do

anyways like i hate winter and the start of spring is great but anything that makes you feel better than usual is a Cruel Reminder of how terrible you always feel and the contrast of the comparison provides a painful point of reference for how things could/should be, but aren’t/can’t be for you.....the ol “antidepressants can increase risk of suicide” element of things.......