#just a reminder to never prioritize your job

[evycarnahan]

+

[hangesfavles]

Cowboy Hange headcanons

6.5K WORDS HOLY SCHMOLY!!!!! NB Hange x afab reader ^_^ <3 i tried keeping it genny nooch but i think hange refers to reader as cowgirl once sorry :(

Summary: i sorta stole the beginning of stardew valley as the intro to this fic helpp ... i also leaned into the idea of sheriff hange bc they’re the 14th commander and allat so i think its cute to imagine them as a sheriff in this au. i love this idea tho i think its so fun save a horse ride hange zoe 

Warnings: brief mention of guns bc Hange is a sheriff, shmuuuuttttt under the border, hair pulling, strap riding B) aka MINORS DNI!!!!!!!!! #hangebackshots

a/n: HIIIIIII THIS IS MY FIRST REQUEST OH EM GEE SO EXCITED TO WRITE FOR IT FDSADFGHJHGFD I HOPE U LIKE IT ANON!! Also i'm sorry i feel like this is more like a baby between a full length fic and hcs but it sorta came out like a story, I hope that's ok tho ;( If you guys want more cowboy hange content... i'm gonna shamelessly promote my friend, you can read both southern skies and runaway horses on ao3! I had been actually helping that friend revise southern skies bc i loved the story sm when i first read it. <3 <3 <3 @meetmeinmontauuk

❥Cowboy! Hange was definitely on the fence about you when you first moved into town. The only reason for their suspicion is their previous experience with who they call “city folk.” Their previous encounters with them had been a bit rocky, since life in town was very traditional. Not in a discriminatory way, they just preferred having a hospitable, close-knit community. 

They’re used to city folk coming with an unfriendly attitude towards strangers. They dislike how they tend to prioritize individualism and a faster pace of life. For a while, their wariness seemed deeply ingrained, as if every newcomer carried the same weight of expectation. They sort of felt obligated to be concerned about you as the town’s sheriff. 

❥When the opportunity arose for you to move out of the overwhelming city, out of the shitty studio you pay way too much money for, you practically ran for the hills. 

Despite the things you hated about city life, it’s what you were used to and you know that moving directly into a town this small was going to be a culture shock for you. You found a quaint job as a librarian in a town named Shiganshina, where the headcount barely exceeds triple digits. 

You felt that suited you now that you’re getting older. You’re not as excitable and extroverted as you used to be, now you’re at an age where you’d like to settle down and find a place to spend the rest of your life- which you’ve long decided is not in the bustling city that never sleeps. 

You were happy to find a quiet job where you won’t have to talk to people very often, where the bulk of your day is spent with headphones on as you place books back on their rightful spot on the shelves.  

Now that you have all of your belongings tucked away, all that's left to do is actually commute to your brand new city. It took a draining few hours, but now you’re finally headed into Shiganshina. However, your GPS’ directions are starting to confuse you, leaving you circling the same area about 3 times. 

From what you’ve seen so far, the town seems very cozy. As you drive past the same village you’ve found yourself trapped in, you're only now noticing the comforting scent of freshly baked bread wafting from the local bakery. This town in general smells far better than the smells of the big city you had been previously living in. 

This small southern town holds a charm that's as warm and cozy as the sun-soaked streets that remind you of your childhood days spent playing in the park with whoever you met there that day. 

As you’re making your 4th loop around this same block, you spot a figure in the distance. As you grow closer, you squint your eyes, and- Holy fuck is that person riding a horse in the middle of the street????

This person seems equally confused by your car as you do by their horse. However, you notice their horse trotting towards your car from a distance, causing you to slow down next to them and roll down your window. 

“Hiya. It’s been a while since I’ve seen someone use a car ‘round these parts.” They start with an airy chuckle, their ever so slight southern accent rolling off their tongue with grace. It's the kind of accent that leaves a warm feeling inside you, effortlessly expressing their friendliness and filling you with a sense of belonging, even if you were only passing through. 

This stranger’s face doesn’t really match their tone. Their physical appearance reminds you of the bitter taste of medicine, but their voice is similar to the spoonful of honey used as a chaser to sweeten the former. 

You give them a quick glance up and down, your eyes scanning their outfit consisting of blue jeans and an open flannel, a tank top underneath that defines their lean build. More interestingly, you catch a buckled belt with a holstered pistol attached. “So, you're a fresh face ain’tcha?” 

Despite their weathered features and the weariness etched into every line on their face, their upbeat tone flows with a kind tenderness that catches you off guard. You aren’t going to lie and say you weren’t slightly skeptical after noticing that this person is fully armed. 

“Are you tryna pass through, or are you lookin’ for somethin’ in particular?” They look down at you from their elevated position on their horse. You look up at them with obvious hesitation. 

“Aha... Yeah, I’m supposed to be moving in today, but I’ve been up and down this same block for the past 15 minutes...” You avert your eyes back to your GPS. “Um... Do you happen to know where 93 Willow Lane is?” 

They chuckle at your question, though you’re not sure why. “Yeah, I know my way ‘round town. You’re not gonna find Willow Lane in your car.” They tilt their cowboy hat, having their horse take a step back. They point in front of them, and you stick your head out of the window to see. They’re pointing toward a dirt path in the grass that’s littered with a few stepping stones. 

“You’ll find 93 down that way. Not many people drive in town, we usually prefer walkin’ or biking. Or horse ridin’, in my case. You can’t park right outside, but on the bright side, you should’ve passed the parkin’ garage when you were lost. It’s right around the corner, real close by.” They explain to you with a shining smile. “Go on and park your car. I can help you carry your things inside.”  

❥Cowboy! Hange does exactly that. They carry about 3-4 of your boxes at one time, which helps get the job done a lot faster than you can, since you can only hold the weight of 2 at a time. 

The last trip the two of you make to your car, all you have left to carry in is a small backpack filled with your laptop and some chargers. Hange hops back onto their horse with ease, looking down at you. “You ever ride a horse before? I’ll give you a ride over to your place on ol’ Sawney.” They say, stroking their horses mane affectionately. 

They notice how nervous you seem as you shift on the balls of your feet. “Not really, no... The only non-domestic animals I’ve ever seen are rats... and pigeons.” You say, shifting your eyes from glancing up at Hange to down at Sawney. Your previous life in the city had conditioned you to be wary of animals. One thing you learn quickly is that you should never get too close to an animal, no less touch one. 

They can read the emotions on your face like a book. Not that it was particularly hard to tell that you were nervous. “Aw, c’mon! Sawney won’t hurt’cha. He’s sweet as a peach.” They sing playfully leaning down closer to your height. “I’m not sure I can-” You attempt to create an excuse so that you don’t have to get on the back of this creature, but Hange cuts you off quickly, hopping back down from the animal. “Trust me, of course you can! I’ll even help ya get on. Plus, I’ll be the one steering him behind ya.” 

❥Cowboy! Hange demonstrates to you how to properly get on the horse, stepping into the stirrup and swinging their body over with relative ease. They can tell you’re still nervous, so they get off and hold your waist for support, hoisting you up. Sawney doesn’t seem to be affected at all by your inexperience. “Now look at that! You did just fine. I told you there was nothin’ to worry ‘bout.” They say, patting your shoulder roughly. Despite the way their praise makes your stomach fill with butterflies, you can’t fully appreciate their words due to the anxiety that takes priority over your emotions. You’re shaking like a leaf on top of Sawney, and you have to hold back an embarrassing yelp as they rest their hand on your shoulder.

❥Cowboy! Hange hops on Sawney behind you, as promised. You nervously lean back against their chest as their arms hold the reins in front of you, unintentionally surrounding you. Their chest is pressed up against your back, their thighs on either side of your body. 

For the first few minutes of riding, your hands nervously clutch at their jeans for stability. But the longer you sit atop Sawney- practically cuddled up in this attractive stranger's arms- the anxiety that clouded over your other emotions starts to clear, allowing you to feel embarrassed and meek.

❥Cowboy! Hange notices your discomfort and chuckles softly. "You’re doin’ just fine. Sawney’s a smooth rider. You’ll get used to ridin’ real quick." Their voice is calm and reassuring, and you find yourself gradually relaxing in their presence. The gentle sway of the horse’s movements, combined with the warmth of Hange's body against yours starts to feel oddly soothing for someone you’ve only just met. 

As you travel down the dirt path, the scenery changes from the small town center to more rustic surroundings. The field of vibrant green grass littered with mixed wildflowers stretches far beyond where the small settling of houses reside, making the space seem almost uncanny, but also dreamlike. 

Hange rides right up to the front of your new house with ease, getting themself off the horse first in order to help you get down. After successfully making sure you don’t fall off of Sawney, you thank them. They grab the rim of their hat and give you a slight nod. “Anytime.” They say with an award winning smile. 

You play with your fingers, picking at your fingernails as you work up the courage to ask them a question. “Um... The house is pretty empty, but would you like to come in for a while?” You ask them, looking up from your fingers to give them a smile in return. “Sure, why the hell not?” They shrug their shoulders, their lighthearted demeanor contradicting everything you originally assumed about them.

❥Cowboy! Hange inquires about your life before moving here. You tell them all about how you grew up in the city, what life there is like, and how you felt like you had to get out. In turn, Hange tells you about what life was like growing up on a farm in the same town you’ve just moved into. How they used to play in the dirt, throwing worms at other kids and going out at night to try and grab frogs. 

The two of you made yourselves comfortable on the small couch in your living room; regardless of the fact that the house came with little furniture, you already feel yourself falling in love with the place.

❥Cowboy! Hange truly enjoys the conversation you share, despite their reservations about people from out of town. They find you to be much kinder and soft spoken in comparison to the others they’ve met. They aren’t sure why, but they feel drawn to you in a unique way. However, they’ll chalk it up to the fact the two of you are getting along quickly and they make a note to stop by again to have another chat.

"Welcome to Shiganshina," Hange says, their smile as warm as the sunlight streaming through the windows. "If you need help movin’ in or anything, don’t hesitate to holler. We’re a tight-knit community here, so if you can’t find me, I’m sure someone else’ll come runnin’. I have a feelin’ you’ll fit right in." 

❥Cowboy! Hange tends to stroll around in town on their horse when the days are warm. They don’t technically need to, the station would simply call them if they were needed, but it’s something they enjoy regardless of their position as sheriff. 

On a particularly warm day with the sun hanging bright in the sky, you decided to use your day off to spend some time outside and hopefully get your vitamin d levels up. So, you decided to take a stroll through the local park. You’ve seen it in passing, and it’s full of life and shrubbery and flowers you hadn’t gotten the chance to see or appreciate in the city. 

A short while after you enter the park, you see a few groups of people already there. It starts to make you feel self conscious that everyone here showed up with a friend, family member or partner, but you had no one alongside you. Lucky for you, Hange also seized the opportunity to stroll around outdoors.

Hange sees you from afar as their other horse Bean trots along the sidewalk. They had an inner debate with themself over if they should approach you, but their insecurities were tossed aside when they noticed that your form is rigid and you’re picking at your fingers nervously. 

They smile to themself because they understand why you would feel uncomfortable in a situation like your own, moving into a small town out of the blue where everyone already knows each other. They’re familiar with the feeling of awkwardness, even if they’ve lived here their whole life. 

Despite having been raised in Shiganshina, they also sometimes feel out of place compared to other residents. For a while now, they’ve been feeling out of place with all of the budding romance in town. It feels to them that everyone they know is in a serious relationship or married, but they haven’t even been interested in anyone for what feels like forever.

It’s not that they never wanted or expected to fall in love, it was just something that hadn’t happened for them yet. After being alone for so long, they had kind of gotten used to it. Hange had resigned themself to the idea that maybe they were meant to be alone. But now, seeing you standing there with a nervous demeanor, butterflies stirred within their stomach, only confirming the feelings of affection already forming for you. 

Once they get closer to you, they tap your shoulder. “Howdy, sugar. You’re stickin’ out like a sore thumb.” They say, giving you a smile and reaching for your wrist. They lead you and Bean towards a free bench, closeby to a lake. You can’t help but chuckle at how quickly they saved you from your own embarrassment. In a moment of confidence, you slip your wrist out of their grip, instead opting to hold their hand. 

The sound of the keys jangling from their carabiner as their legs move catches your attention. You’d never thought the clanging of metal would sound so much like home. Maybe you’re just romanticizing the situation, but it sounds musical, like wind chimes in a storm. As they sit next to you, you’re hit with the smell of freshly cut grass with hints of amber that you can enjoy even over the earthy smell of the lake in front of you. 

They lean forward on the bench, their knees spread apart and their arms resting against their thighs. They tilt their head your way. “So, how’s the town been treatin’ you so far? Ya like it?” Their kindness and concern makes your heart warm. You smile, the corners of your mouth curving upward. “It's been a big adjustment, obviously. But everyone’s been kind so far. It's... peaceful, quiet. Different from what I'm used to, but in a good way.”

You can see the smile reflecting in their eyes without even looking at their lips. Their crows feet are prominent whenever their lips upturn. "I can only ‘magine. But you seem to be holdin’ up just fine."

You glance at the murky lake in front of you, the water about as clear as the cup of coffee you had this morning. Despite this, the surface glimmers faintly under the sun all the same, giving the scene the feel of a landscape painting. 

“I think everyone already has. The few I’ve met at least. My neighbor even brought by some fresh cookies and bread.” You say, recalling the surprise you felt. The lady that dropped by can hardly even be considered your neighbor, as there’s at least a 3 minute walk between your houses. “This place is charming. It's starting to feel homey, though I still get lost sometimes.” You chuckle lightly, raising your hand to cover your smile. 

“Yeah, Shiganshina's got that effect on folks. It ain't fast-paced like the city, but there's plenty’a heart here. I'm glad you're feelin' welcomed.”

You take a deep breath, trying to ignore the buzzing of your nerves as you attempt to hold this conversation. “And you? You seem to know everyone around here. Must be nice.”

Hange chuckles softly, a hint of thoughtfulness in their eyes. They lightly shake their head in disagreement. “Ain't always easy, bein' the sheriff. Knowin' everyone means knowin' their business, the good, bad, and ugly. But it's home, ya know? Can't imagine bein' anywhere else.”

You chuckle lightly at their response, “I can’t imagine you being anywhere else either.” You tease, giving them a coy smile, to which they give you a playfully disapproving look in response. “I understand that, though. I felt like that for a while too before I actually moved. Since I grew up in the city, I was used to the lifestyle and never wanted to deal with a big change.” 

Hange's expression softens from their previous one. "Yeah, I ain’t a big fan of it either," they admit, their tone contemplative and thoughtful. “I’m not an adventurous type. But sometimes a big change can end up being the best for us.”

You look at them with a certain tenderness while you process their wise words. You feel like you have to agree. Moving to Shiganshina had seemed daunting at first, but it brought you a fresh perspective on life. 

Their tight-knit community was beginning to offer you a sense of belonging and you never knew how much you would enjoy it. The slower pace of Shiganshina allowed for more meaningful connections between everyone you knew. At this point, you’ve known Hange for less than a month, and you feel like you’ve had significantly more meaningful conversations with them in comparison to most of your old friends.

Hange interrupts your train of thought as they continue with their sentence. “I hope this move was the best for you. I don't usually warm up quickly to people I've just met.” As you look up to meet their eyes, you swear that they have a certain sparkle. “So, what I’m sayin’ is that there’s somethin’ I like about you. It's not every day that I meet someone like you. It's... nice.” 

At the moment, you’re not exactly sure how to respond to their abrupt vulnerability. Not because you’re uncomfortable- it’s exactly the opposite. You understand what they mean because you feel the same. 

They clear their throat awkwardly, realizing that they might’ve left you feeling at a loss for words. “I just hope we get to know each other better ‘nd all.” They add in a rushed tone. “Oh, would you look at that,” You start to smile due to how fast they try to change the topic, but refrain from laughing. 

“Bean’s gettin’ antsy for some exercise!” They chuckle nervously, getting up from the bench and patting Bean’s backside. They expertly avoid eye contact with you as you follow their actions, getting up from your seat as well. You part your lips to say something to fill the air, but you hear the clearing of Hange’s throat before any sounds come out. “How about you try ridin’ again? By yourself this time.” Their eyes find your own when they ask, making it your turn to dodge eye contact. “Ahhh... Um, I dunno.” You scratch at the back of your neck awkwardly. “I don’t think I’m ready to do it by myself...” 

“Psssh. Nonsense.” That was the last thing you heard before you felt Hange’s strong hands take hold of your waist, lifting you up on Bean with ease. 

You start defensively stuttering “H-Hold on, wait, I-” you scramble. Before you know it, you’re on top of another horse against your wishes. Hange laughs at your skittishness, patting your back similarly to the first time you hopped on Sawney. “You’ll be fine, Bean is a good boy. His rides are a bit more shakey than Sawney, though. But don’t worry, if anything goes wrong I’ll be there to catch’ya. Promise.” They say, looking up at you with such a sweet smile… Fuck, you just can’t deny them when they’re so charming. 

❥You and Cowboy! Hange spent a few hours together at the park. You rode on their horse for what felt like forever but was actually only 45 minutes. Hange insists that you’re a natural but you’re positive that you’re performing lower than the average person, they’re just too nice to say anything about it. 

You two also spent time walking around the perimeter of the lake, watching the owners that let their dogs run free, and best of all, just talking to each other. Being so close to them and watching their facial expressions shift was comforting. You try your best to commit this day to memory by combing all of their features with your eyes over and over.

❥Cowboy! Hange walks you back to your house, Bean strolling at their side. When you both finally reach your front door, you suddenly don’t know what to say. Neither of you truly wants to leave, you can both feel the strings of fate pulling you together, but the night is slipping away, and the reality weighs on both of you. 

Hange shifts on their feet, glancing at you with that familiar sparkle in their eyes, as if they too are searching for the right words. You chuckle, rubbing the back of your neck. “Guess this is goodnight, huh?” Hange grins, but there’s an unspoken promise to be found within it. “For now,” they say, lingering just a moment longer before turning to hop on Bean. 

You watch them, nibbling on the inside of your cheek. Just when you’re about to retreat into your home, their voice causes you to turn your head back to them. “Um… Would it be alright if I stopped by tomorrow? ‘Round this time?” They ask hopefully, bashfully averting their eyes from their reigns to your face. You smile broadly, trying to hide it but inevitably failing. “Yeah, of course. I’ll be here.” You say, trying not to sound too giddy. 

You can’t tell how well you mask your emotions, because you feel like a dog that’s just been told it’s going for a walk. Thank god you don’t have a tail, or it would be wagging wildly. 

Parting ways with them didn’t feel nearly as bad when the promise of reconvening was stuck in your mind like a song that you can’t stop listening to.

❥Cowboy! Hange has a plan. They had an inkling from your first interaction- sitting on your couch and chattering away- that they had a fondness for you. Your run-in at the park only reinforced the feelings that were already present. They knew they wanted to do something special for the next time they’d come by your house.

❥Cowboy! Hange woke up bright and early before their shift at the station to buy a small bundle of flowers from a small shop downtown. The shop was run by a girl with brown hair, tied up into a ponytail with a heavy accent, even more so than them. They think her name was Sasha, if they’re remembering correctly. Hange had a good chuckle from the girl nearly jumping out of her seat as they walked in, a loaf of bread between her jaws whilst ringing them up.

You can’t help but anticipate and daydream of Hange’s arrival from the moment your eyes open until you’re released from your shift at the library. You feel embarrassed by how eagerly you listen to any noise that might be slightly akin to a knock upon the door. You feel like the embodiment of a schoolgirl doodling hearts and initials over their notes. 

When you finally hear the soft rapping of their knuckles against the door, you nearly open the door within the same 5 seconds. You stare at the doorknob for a bit, to avoid seeming like you were waiting for them… Even though you were.

You’re not disappointed when you finally turn the lock and twist the knob. 

❥Cowboy! Hange becomes hyper aware of the dampness settling in their palms as they hear the distinct click of the lock and subtle creak from the door. Their face is partially obscured by the flowers they’re holding up as an attempt to hide their blush. They clear their throat, still peeking from above the bundle of flowers. “So, um… I did some thinking. I figured, why beat around the bush?” They say, practically thrusting the flowers into your hands. “Whaddya say we head out for dinner tonight?” Their lopsided grin charming you more than you thought possible. 

❥Dating Cowboy! Hange is nothing short of a dream. For someone with such little experience with romance and lovey-dovey affections, they are oddly suave. 

Like the town you both live in, they tend to be traditional in the ways in which they treat you. They always have to be the one to pay. They always walk you to your door, all the way. They’re always trying to be chivalrous. They bring you flowers and gifts routinely. They kill bugs for you. 

But of course that’s nothing to look down upon, how could you not be absolutely swooning over them? 

❥Cowboy! Hange decided to fully commit to the idea of teaching you how to ride a horse on your own.

It took plenty of getting used to. At least by the time you two actually started dating you already had some experience.

Warm days were spent atop Sawney or Bean, the horses moving at a relaxed pace, smooth and unhurried around the large open field surrounding your house.

After riding on your own more than a few times, you finally decided you were ready to venture away from your yard and onto actual roads. They were proud of you, you had gone from being absolutely horrified even standing next to their horses, and now you’re riding them on the open road.

You two decided to head to Hange’s house, since you had realized that you hadn’t been there yet by pure coincidence. It had always been easy for Hange to ride over to your house quickly for surprise visits, dinner dates, movie nights, and any other times you two just wanted to see each other.

Once you two arrived, Hange got off their horse first, stepping down to help you dismount as well. Even though your skills were rapidly growing, the one thing you had trouble with was properly getting off. You think too hard about startling the horse that you always trip and inelegantly wobble on your feet to find balance.

Hange strides over to you, hands beginning to lift in order to dismount you, but before they can you decide to try your luck at impressing them by dismounting on your own. You remind yourself that confidence is what you need, hopping off quickly is easier than trying to slowly climb down.

You hop down with ease, landing flat on your feet without stumbling. Their eyes light up with surprise, their open mouth turning up into a smile. Still, before they say anything, you snatch the hat from on top of their head, gracefully placing it atop your hair. “Looks like I’m a real cowboy now. Or do I need to lasso a bull first for the full cowboy certification?” You say with a cheeky smirk gracing your face. 

They weren’t prepared for the sight in front of them, their cheeks warming up at your display of ego. “Well look at that,” Hange drawls, eyes twinkling. They can’t help the swarm of less than pure thoughts that fly through their mind. “You know what they say, cowgirl. If you wear a cowboy's hat, you have to ride the cowboy.” 

Of course, everything Hange does has to have an air of tenderness, and of adoration.

They take your hand as they lead you inside, kissing it before letting go. With the swiftness and ease of ink flowing from a pen, they lift you up as if you weigh nothing. And naturally, they navigate your body as if they had written it themself. 

However, once they have you in their arms they toss you onto their bed unceremoniously, as if you’re nothing more than something to conquer. The hat flies off of your head and in a random direction that you don’t currently care to take note of.

In an instant, their lips are trailing along your neck, a soft sigh of joy passing through your lips. Having them on top of you makes you feel all-consumed by them and their affections.

Their hands are placed on your hips, slowly sliding up beneath your shirt, bunching it up as their hands continue moving. They glance up at you, making sure it’s alright to continue.

You give them a soft smile, grabbing one of their hands and continuing to pull them upwards. This causes them to chuckle at your eagerness and proceed to remove your shirt, leaving you in just your bra.

They decide not to remove your bra, enjoying the idea of being half dressed. With your blanket permission, they also strip your bottom half of your pants. You can’t help but feel a bit shy since you’re the only one undressed.

Hange starts to back up on the bed, starting to kiss you again, this time on your stomach and hips. You softly lock your fingers in their hair, carefully pulling away their ponytail.

Their hair tickles your stomach as it drops to frame their face. They are undeterred by this, even as you bring your dominant hand back towards their head to hold on to a patch of hair.

Once they get their fill of kissing you, they move their attention to your clothed pussy. They lightly brush their tongue up your slit, not bothering to move your underwear. 

They’re nothing if not slow and teasing. Their tongue is going at a painfully slow pace and pressure. They keep teasing your slit up and down, purposely leaving your clit ignored. It’s fucking torture and they know it. 

Once you start to get teary eyed and squirmy, they finally drag their tongue over your clothed clit ever so slowly. After finally having the stimulation you need, your leg muscles twitch beside their head, barely restraining yourself from pushing your hips against them as much as possible. 

You thought you were now free from their torturous teasing. You thought. It couldn’t have been any longer than 2 minutes before they pulled back, getting up from the bed entirely. You almost allow the tears building in your eyes to fall, until you see them start to remove their own clothes. 

Your eyes are fully glued to their form as they undress. Their chest is relatively small and perky, so they didn’t feel a need to wear a bra or binder today. This means you’re quickly met with their bare skin. 

They look towards you, feeling your eyes practically burning a hole through them. They chuckle at your focus on them. “Impatient?” They say with a grin playing on their face. In response to their question, you roll your eyes before giving them an unamused look. “…A’right.” They say, getting the message that if they keep teasing you that you would probably burst into flames…

With a quicker pace, they pull on their harness over their boxers, securing their strap into it.

Their strap is pretty standard definition. It’s average sized for a dildo, about 7 inches. A solid black color. Veiny and phallic shaped. 

When they head back over to you, they press their lips into your own. Lovingly at first, but quickly it turns heated and fervent. 

Their hands travel to your lower back, lifting you up by it and flipping you backwards.

Once their strap begins to settle inside you, you realize why they had been so kind before. Because they won’t be so forgiving now.

They grab a handful of your hair as they start to thrust into you more, having been prepped by their tongue prior. 

They aren’t too cruel, they start slow as to not hurt you, but within the blink of an eye your neck is craning backwards from their hold on your hair, their hips roughly bumping against your ass.

Fuck. It hurts, but it’s better than any pain you can imagine. The feeling of them inside of you, reaching deeper than you’re used to… you’re surprised you’re not seeing stars. 

Hange cranes your neck just a bit more so that they can lean in to whisper into your ear. You’re sure that they said something, but you’re not coherent enough to truly process it. The slight feeling of pain from your hair tugging at your head paired with the pace of their hips is making you delirious.

Their free hand slides across your hip, slinking around your stomach to circle your clit. Because of this you’re panting hard and crying out their name weakly and it doesn’t take much longer for you to cum. 

They slow their pace as you ride out your orgasm, changing from rough and fast to slow and more deep. They release their hold on your hair and you realize your arms feel weak, causing you to nose dive into the pillow below you.

They giggle softly at you and carefully pull their strap out and turn you over. You look up at them with a smile, wrapping your arms around their shoulders and pulling them closer. 

They smile as well as they hover over you. “I didn’t hurt’cha, right?” They ask with slight nervousness. With a teasing look you say “Not too badly, at least.”

“Ahh, you’ve got jokes.” They tease, dipping their head to kiss your neck. That shuts you up quickly. 

It’s your turn to run your fingers in their hair, which you do, tilting your head up so they have more skin to take advantage of.

And they don’t let the opportunity pass them by. Their lips travel to your collarbone, sucking a mark in a modest area. They may have the libido of a teen boy, but they don’t want to bring that type of embarrassment to either of you.

They continue to wind you up as slowly and teasingly as possible. Your patience is running thinner than paper, so you wrap your leg around their side, pushing them under you. 

Their expression of slight shock and pure wonder is priceless. “This was technically the deal, wasn’t it? Riding the cowboy.” You chuckle. 

They stare up at you owlishly, their hands grazing your thighs and sliding to your hips. They guide you back on their strap slowly. 

You didn’t expect to feel so full in this position. Your fingers dig into their shoulders as you use your legs to move up and down. You also didn’t realize how strenuous this would be. Shit, maybe it’s time to hit the gym.

You don’t let the burn in your legs deter you, especially not when Hange is below you, looking at you as if you crafted the earth and heavens just for them. 

Thankfully it becomes easier to ignore when the burning in your stomach outweighs the sensation in your legs. 

You feel like a ghost of yourself, watching distantly as a ragdoll shaped like you tries to chase release. The only thing keeping you grounded at the moment is the visibility of Hange’s enjoyment. It’s surprisingly motivating.

Their hands are everywhere. On your hips, thighs, back, chest, shoulders… They can’t get enough of your soft skin paired with your undivided attention. “Fuck…” They mumble with a chuckle under their breath. 

You’re so close, and hearing their soft curse only brings you closer. The heat in your center is almost unbearable as you sigh and moan tiredly. 

They notice your lethargy and decide to help you out. They get a strong hold on your waist and start thrusting upwards to give your legs a bit of a break.

“You look so good like this, sugar. Keep going.” They say as they pull you closer in their hold, their chin resting on your chest as they gaze straight up at you.

With their encouragement and aid of their hips, you cum hard. Your head lolls back as you continue to ride out your orgasm on their lap. They keep their hands on your hips as they fuck their strap into you, their grip tight and slightly bruising. “That’s it… just like that.” They mumble to you. You lift yourself off of their lap, slumping down beside them tiredly. 

They pull off their harness, flopping beside you in bed. Their arms pull you into their warm, comforting embrace, their head resting against your own. They whisper praises in your ear until you drift off to sleep.

You’re a bit disoriented when you wake up. You sit up and realize you aren’t in your own bed, the memory of events invading your mind seconds after. Only problem is that you don’t see Hange. You’re sure they’re still here, it is their house after all, but you still feel a bit sad that their presence wasn’t beside you. 

You step out of bed and feel the weakness in your legs immediately. You grab your discarded clothes before carefully wobbling out of their room at a slow pace, as if you’re learning how to walk for the first time again. You definitely need to hit the StairMaster after this. 

When you step out of their bedroom, you see them attempting to cook you dinner. It’s nothing particularly special, just a panini and some french fries, but you can see how concentrated they are as they try their best to ensure the panini won’t burn. 

They hear the pattering of your bare feet against the floor, which causes them to look over their shoulder. “Hi darlin’. I’m making dinner, you should head back to bed to rest. I’m sorry if I went a little too rough.” 

(Almost) always the gentleman. You walk over and wrap your arms around their waist, leaning against their broad chest. “It’s alright. It was worth the soreness.” You assure them quietly. Their arms drape over your shoulders, one hand stroking your hair while the other rubs your back lightly.

“If you say so.” They say, kissing your forehead. You stay like this for a while, listening to the thumping of their heart as you rest against them. Everything about their presence is soothing, whether they’re touching you or not. And when they add touch to the equation? Forget about it. You could probably fall asleep standing up. 

You only lift your head from their chest as you feel a tingle in your nose. You sniff a few times before looking up at them. “Do you smell that?” You ask.

Hange stiffens in your hold, turning around to see smoke coming from the sandwich they were making you. The sight of the grey puffs trailing up to the ceiling causes them to spring into action, to remove the sandwich before a fire starts. “Shit!-”

<3 i’m sorry this took literally like 10 months to come out i’ve been busy with work and college since i’m nearing the end of my undergrad degree…. what da hail. i hope it was worth the wait cus im pretty happy with how this turned out!!!!

[merakiui]

thinking about android sunday. :)

android sunday who is programmed to have your best interests in mind at all times. every aspect of you is his priority. your health, your well-being, your happiness, your safety, etc. he serves his purpose well (sometimes a little too well). you've told him before he doesn't need to go so overboard. like when you've been sitting at your desk for too long, so focused on your work, and he gently coaxes you out of the chair, helping you up and nudging you around the house to get some exercise. you'll do that eventually. he doesn't have to babysit you.

or when he makes note of specific changes in your hormones, much to your embarrassment at times. announcing to your guests or even a date you're having over how your endorphin levels have increased significantly and your heart rate has increased ever so slightly, indicating happiness and anxiety. and you have to hurriedly push him into the next room or demand he return to his charging station, babbling about how you don't need him to announce your vitals to everyone! >_< these things should be kept private.

sunday is here to make your life easier, so he cleans the house when you're out. he cooks when you're too exhausted to do so, and now he insists on it. after all, you need to prioritize your health more. please relax while he cooks your favorite, every recipe downloaded and saved in a vast database. you're glad to have an extra set of hands around the house because sometimes life gets busy and you just don't have the time for cooking or cleaning. sunday will look after you as he always does.

sunday assesses everything based on the risk it may have towards you and your well-being. perhaps he is willing to allow you to have one extra sweet after dinner because it will make you happy, and he finds he quite enjoys the sight of your smile. friends or loved ones who hurt you and cause you any sort of suffering are risks he refuses to let into your life. sunday does well to clean up the messes they leave. an ex's belongings serve no purpose in your precious home, so he will dispose of them posthaste.

and you were grateful for him and his help. you really were, but now it's starting to become...excessive. he fusses over you too much. it's too...controlling. obsessive. care taken to extremes.

sunday refuses to remind you of important dates and events scheduled on your calendar solely because he's so certain he knows what is best for you. sometimes he doesn't even schedule the events when you tell him to. a date with a stranger is no good; you don't need that kind of connection when he is more than willing to provide it. that friend who has been trying to make amends with you, inviting you to lunch? also a risk. why are you asking him to order such...revealing clothes? surely you do not intend to open yourself up to potential harm? these clothes will only invite the worst of scum. as such, he takes it upon himself to place orders for modest fashion only. taking measures to dress appropriately not only increases your chances of leaving a positive impression, but they also draw the right people your way. sensible people.

you keep telling sunday to just do as you say. he should not make these decisions based on all of that stuffy logic. "there are some things—human things—that you'll never understand, so please have more faith in me. i know what i'm doing. i can take care of myself," you tell him, but sunday does not like that.

it is his duty to look after you. if he thinks you're making poor choices, the job falls to him to correct your mistakes. he is here to make sure you're happy and safe, and under his care and supervision you will be. no one else can provide that for you. not even you!

it is sunday who can hum and sing you to sleep. it is sunday who plays piano for your guests when you wish to be classy and impress them. it is sunday who tracks your health and reminds you to take your medicine or vitamins. it is sunday who tailors his methods based on your needs. it is sunday who saves recipes that will be beneficial for your health. it is sunday who downloads new resources to better improve your life. you, you, you. always you. forever you. he is for you, and you are for him.

it is sunday who is slowly shaping himself into what he feels is the ideal partner for you. you have taught him lots about humans and he puts all of it into practice, even if the approach may come off as awkward or unnatural. he will make efforts to learn more, to store more data on humans and their bonds, just so he can please you.

no matter what happens, you must never forget that he is here to help you, not harm you—never harm you.

[thecloudsaremyhome]

✧Pity party✧

Yandere batfam x neglected reader

TW: thoughts of suicide and depression

When have I ever been enough for them? When have they ever been their for me? When…when!

It’s like a constant void is inside of me tearing me from the inside and out slowly consuming my body and mind.

It all started when you lost your mother. She was never the best person figuratively but she was the best to you. She loved you so much and that’s all that mattered to you. Well at the time it did but you can't take anymore of the lonely nights alone you cant take the missed birthdays and missed events only to be forgotten later you cant take it anymore and the sad part is…. You only blame yourself every false promise, every forgotten birthday, every holiday spent alone you blame yourself. Why is that? Well you won't ever be good enough you'll never be good enough to be considered part of their family to have dinners in the dining room instead of up in your old room alone. To have movie nights together, to cuddle with dick and be on the receiving end of his affection to paint and draw with damian as we banter, to go shopping with Cassandra and stephanie, to at least hang out with barbara or to at least sit in silence with jason. You'll never be good enough ever and its hard to admit that fact but you had to have the universe have it out for you to make you suffer and it did its job well. It hurts it hurt so fucking bad that it just wants to make you scream to bang your head into the wall until it bleeds to cut yourself over and over again until the pain stops until the void is filled. Because in reality it will never be filled, the void in your heart and soul can never be filled. It will grow stronger and stronger until it bursts until you make the final decision to grab a knife and slowly slit your throat. Because when your mother died your soul died with her. But the only thing stopping your from achieving your plan was Alfred, he was your only solace and no matter how bad it hurt seeing him prioritize them over you he was still their at least. But it was never enough you will never be enough thats what you constantly reminded yourself throughout the fourteen years you've lived in the manor that you will never be good enough for anyone and you've accepted that fact over and over again with dicks false promises, damian's harsh words stephanie's pitying stare cassandera’s ignorance to your presence tims calculating gaze looking at you as if your an object and your fathers ignorant look to your absolute existence. It hurt it hurt so fucking bad seeing them bond seemlessy togther but then excluding you like your nothing more than trash maybe you are? Maybe you really are just a piece of garbage to them a fly in a room of butterflies you'll never shine like they do you'll sit in the background hoping and waiting for the chance to be loved the chance to feel affection for the first time, and sense well you don't know. All you can understand is you'll never be enough and thats fine youll just sit in the background as they shine you'll always be heard but never seen. You’ll wait and wait until its finally time to mae your exit and leave to go beyond the land of butterflies and explore a new and brighter land but be carefully little fly butterflies may be pretty but they are just as dangerous as well.

Authors note: hello everyone welcome to a series called pity party! This is a prologue! But you can all send in asks!

[girlkisser13]

being married to mei mei would include

• mei mei KNOWS she’s a goddess— and she expects to be worshipped accordingly.

• when you kiss along her knuckles as she hands you a glass of wine, fingers tracing down her collarbone and murmur, "how could anyone not adore you?"— it never fails to make her blush every time.

• mei mei makes it clear from day one that she prioritizes money… but you’d be the one person who comes before any paycheck.

• you know how everyone gets that subtle, uneasy tension around mei mei— like they’re never quite sure if she’s flirting with them or planning their funeral?

• you’re the only person who ever gets to see her without that mask. with you, she doesn’t need to play games or manipulate— she can simply be.

• she’d stretch out across your lap in nothing but a silk robe, sipping wine while reading some ancient cursed text, completely at ease in her own skin because she knows the only person who could ever destroy her… would rather kiss her instead.

• you’re the only person allowed to see her with her hair down, face bare, wrapped up in a silk robe with her head in your lap while you play with her hair.

• she’d never say it out loud— but the second your fingers start trailing through those silver strands, her whole body goes loose and lazy like a cat in the sun.

• if you ever call her pretty in one of those moments? she’ll open one eye and smirk, "flattery will get you everywhere."

• she would sell out the entire jujutsu world if you asked her to.

• she leaves you handwritten letters whenever she’s away on missions— sealed with crimson wax and signed "yours, always.".

• mei mei has expensive tastes, and if you’re married to her, you’re living in luxury. first-class flights, designer clothes, penthouse hotels… the works.

• but it’s not just for show— she genuinely enjoys spoiling you. if you’re the type to feel guilty about it, she’ll smirk and tell you, "if you’re worth it, why not?"

• if anyone so much as looks at you wrong, the bounty on their head would be placed before they even realized what they’d done.

• the only way you’d ever know is if she casually mentions a "business expense" while checking her account.

• you don’t even realize how much she’s orchestrating your entire life behind the scenes.

• you got that dream job? mei mei made three phone calls.

• that weird stalker who was bothering you last month? disappeared.

• your favorite coffee shop suddenly has your order memorized, and they never charge you? mei mei slipped them a little extra on the side— not because she had to, but because she likes watching the world bend around you.

• if you’re in danger, she’ll handle it before you ever know. the only clue would be the way she holds you a little tighter that night, fingers running through your hair like she’s reminding herself you’re still there.

• she likes to trace her initials onto your thigh with the tip of her fingernail while you’re both half-asleep.

• mei mei is not one to constantly show affection, but when she does, it’s meaningful. she will show affection through small, intimate touches that reflect how much she trusts you.

• a hand on your back when walking together, or a hand on your arm when you’re sitting side by side— these moments may seem simple, but they carry a lot of weight.

• her whole personality is built on knowing she’s hot and making sure everyone else knows it too. but with you, there’s an added layer of genuine affection beneath the teasing.

• she LOVES making you flustered, leaning in close to whisper something suggestive with that lazy smile�� only to laugh softly when you stumble over your words.

• when she calls you darling or traces a finger down your spine, it’s always genuine. even if her words drip with honey, the affection behind them is real.

• mei mei likes to kiss the inside of your wrist whenever she walks past you— not even thinking about it, just pure muscle memory

• she always presses a kiss to your forehead every time she leaves for a mission— always without fail, even if you’re half-asleep.

• you often come home to find her counting stacks of money on the kitchen table, smirking as she says, "another mission completed… i missed you, my love."

• she would work for free if it meant keeping you safe. you are the one luxury she could never afford to lose. <33

[deleteddewewted]

How To Not Welcome The New Years (MHA)

(MHA Edition x Gn! Reader)

MDNI

W: Everyone is Aged Up (18+), Cheating, Angst, Hurt/Injured, No One Is a Good Person Including the Reader, (C: Bakugou, Shinso, Monoma, Kirishima, Aizawa, and Hawks)

Bakugou

He was always too busy for the smallest of things.

He was too busy to set up a date night.

He was always too busy.

He had no problem doing the interviews he hated but he had an issue if you asked him to go to bed with you if you wanted some affection.

Your relationship was wilting away right under him and he seemed to not care.

You checked out of it already. You were ready for him to end things soon since he didn't bother to get you a present for Christmas and he didn't even come home for the holiday either.

He didn't even bother to open them once he got home and instead went to his office to finish up some reports.

You thought that maybe he would try to put in an effort for New Year's.

His agency always hosts a party for the sidekicks and you, delusionally, thought he would take you.

He left you behind at home to greet the new year.

You called him.

He surprised you when he picked up. In the background, you could hear his friends talking.

Maybe once upon a time, it would hurt that he was prioritizing his friends but you were numb. It no longer mattered.

"What do you need Y/n?" He was annoyed. Maybe it was at you. Maybe it was because of how loud his friends were being. Kirishima could be heard in the background talking about some trip he had planned for after New Year's.

You dont remember the last time he ever took you on a vacation.

"I'm breaking up with you. I'll be out by tonight." You're to the point. There was no reason for you to prolong it.

He fell out of love and you were done with being in love with someone who didn't see you as worth spending his time on.

"W-what?! What are you talking about?"

"Bye Bakugou." You ended the call and began packing.

Your phone kept ringing as you packet. You turned it off after the 5th call.

You had an apartment already. You had it just in case you ended the relationship earlier.

You welcomed the new year alone and walking down the busy and joy-filled streets of Japan, bags in hand and phone turned off.

Shinso

He was so sweet when you both started dating.

He was attentive and patient with you. Never did he raise his voice even when you were in the wrong.

He coddled you and that was something you didn't mind too much as your relationship progressed.

It felt nice to be wanted and to be looked after but it began to change as you both got older and entered your respective careers.

He started snapping at you.

He was angry. He reminded you of Bakugou but he lacked the ego.

The once loving and comforting Shinso was now a brut who came home to get upset with you.

He yelled, he cried. He was frustrated beyond belief. He repeated as much to you.

"You wouldn't understand just how hard my job is." doesn't matter if you worked the same job or not, he always made you feel like you were not as hard-working or as overworked as him.

For the holidays he didn't bother to put on a happy face when you visited your family. He started arguing that you should have gone to his family for the holidays.

For New Years you had hoped he would've appreciated the reservation you made at his favorite restaurant.

You dressed up and made sure to make yourself look and feel good. You liked having an excuse to dress up, try something new, and see what might make him happy.

You both agreed to meet at the restaurant since he was out working.

And when you got there he was in his hero uniform instead of the suit he had said he was going to change into at the agency he worked at.

He was sweaty and dirty, and his hair had stuck to his forehead.

"Shinso, you said that-" You were cut off as he slammed his hand against the table, the drinks that had been set spilling onto the table and onto the floor.

"For fuck sake, Y/n. I just got off of work. Can I please relax?" He snapped at you.

You started the New Year crying. He kept muttering to himself about how upsetting it was that he couldn't eat in peace.

Monoma

He was gentlemanly with you. Always opening the door for you, taking his jacket/hoodie/coat off so you could wear it even if it means that he'd be cold.

He was always attentive even if he was self-centered at times.

As he entered his career he was bombarded with work all at once. He never had a moment for you and when he got home he would say he was tired.

You thought that maybe for the Holidays he would get a break but that wasn’t the case. He was working late, barely answering his phone and sleeping at the agency just so he could finish paperwork.

He told you that he would take you to the agency’s New Year’s party.

You were enjoying the music and the drinks, speaking to his friends and your friends when you realized he wasn’t by your side anymore.

You looked for him and in a hallway you found him kissing with someone who you knew to be a sidekick.

“Monoma” You didn’t know what to say or do. He jumped and pushed the sidekick away before trying to get close to you.

“Y/n! W-Wait! Let me explain. This is all a big misunderstanding!” He tried explaining but you were already walking away. He went back to the party and couldn’t find you anywhere.

No one knew where you were and he couldn’t get a hold of you. He started panicking thinking that you might have gotten hurt or worse.

Kirishima

Kirishima didn’t know when to quit and that was the reason why you loved him so much.

He was always trying to push himself to do things that he might fear for the sake of someone else.

He was scared to ask you out and when he managed to get the word with he couldn’t help let out a cheer when you accepted to date him.

Once he started his pro-hero career it took a lot out of him. Physically and mentally.

He was constantly getting injured and every time you had come to the hospital not knowing how or why he got hurt.

There were times when he nearly died and it left you distraught. You never knew when it would be the last time you’d see him.

And he refused to tell you what he was doing or how hurt he was.

New Year's was no different.

He was hurt and bleeding out after fighting a villain. He was rushed to the hospital and when you arrived to check up on him he snapped at you when you began asking him what happened.

You had spent so long telling him that you wanted him to stop taking so many risks. His health and life were on the line and he truly didn’t need to be making brash decisions.

"Y/n, if I don't do this who will?" He was frustrated and you understood that but you also dreaded someday not having the chance to see him again.

"Eijiro, please-"

"Y/n, stop. Just please stop." He doesn't want to hear you complain and he asks you to leave.

He hears the fireworks outside his hospital room.

Aizawa

He's always stressed out and that's how you met him.

He was feeding strays on his patrol and he saw you doing the same.

You started dating and it didn't bother you at all that he was absent often since he worked at UA and as an underground hero.

He made an effort to be there for the holidays but even if he couldn't be there he would make sure to tell you in advance.

The only issue with this was that he prioritized work and solitude more than being around people.

You could understand that he wanted to have his breaks in peace but it also meant that he would push you away.

It started bothering you after a while. You told him that you'd like to spend more time with him and he agreed that he could try but nothing changed.

UA decided to host a New Year's party for the teachers and students.

Aizawa went, not bothering to tell you, and when you tried getting a hold of him he didn't answer his phone.

You got into an argument when he came back.

"Why didn't you tell me you were going to the party? I could have joined you." You felt hurt.

"I only went to keep the peace. Hizashi made me go."

"And you could have brought me so I could meet your coworkers."

"Stop it. Im tired and want to sleep, Y/n." He cut you off.

He went to bed leaving you to sleep on the couch as you watched the news broadcasters celebrate the new year.

Hawks

He played the role of an attentive boyfriend well.

He felt something for you, he knew it was something positive but he didn't know if he could define it as love.

He was always good at pretending so it didn't hurt to try and be your boyfriend.

It was a new relationship and he liked the affection he got from you. it was nice.

He felt appreciated in a way he hadn't been before.

Your touch, your kisses, your hugs. It was warm and inviting.

It all came crashing during the New Year party the hero commissioned hosted for all ranked heroes.

He was getting pictures with fans, talking with possible investors for his agency, talking with heroes, and all while ignoring you.

You understood he had his priorities on his agency but ever since you two started dating, it felt like he wasn't really invested in the relationship. Like something was missing from it.

When the countdown began, you tried getting him to join you out on the balcony. You wanted to greet the new year with him but he wouldn't budge.

"Give me a second." He said before making his way over to Endeavor and Jeanist.

The clock hit midnight and everyone cheered as they congratulated each other.

Hawks didn't go back to you at all. You left the party without telling him anything and just went back to your apartment.

He didn't notice you were gone until they started clearing the space and the cleaning crew started cleaning up.

He looked for you and when he couldn't find you he tried calling.

You never answer him and so he left to search for you before leaving you a last text and heading home.

[twinkling-moonlillie]

Feather Necklace (Hawks/Keigo x Reader)

Warnings: None! This is really fluffy with little hints of angst.

A/N: HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE!! This was an idea mentioned in my Keigo headcanons that I wanted to expand upon. As always, likes, reblogs, and comments are dutifully appreciated <3

Heroism involved sober servitude, a selfless courage and readied ability to sacrifice. There was no room for prioritization of lives. All lives were equal during an emergency, even if the one in danger was the love of your life. 

This was the life that Hawks lived day after day. His wings were stiffly burdened with the lives of millions and he was sure that the weight would eventually kill him. He never truly minded though. Forming any intimate connection with someone else was a foreign concept to Hawks so adhering to these rules wasn’t that much of a challenge. 

Selfishness was frowned upon heavily in hero society, and Hawks never really minded until he met you. You - with your opulent eyes and dazzling smile - somehow made his knees weak. You, who easily unfolded his heart as if it weren’t made out of steel. You who softly reminded him that it was okay, healthy even, to be selfish. 

Keigo wanted to permanently paint your cheeks red with laughter, to be the one you looked for in a crowded room, to have the honor of intimately studying your skin under the canopy of falling stars. For the first time in his life, Hawks experienced what it felt like to fall. 

But, despite the immense love he had for you, it didn’t change the fact that most of his energy was dedicated to the entire population of Japan. Sacrifice never really held meaning to him until his mind started conjuring vivid nightmares where your fingertips slipped from his, realities where he watched helplessly as the stars in your eyes fizzled out. 

Every morning when he left the warm comfort of your shared bed, he was met with unsurmountable anxiety. If there was an emergency, God forbid an attack, there was no guarantee he could drop all his duties and protect you. There was a certain detachment he had to undergo just to perform his job well. He couldn’t be the fast and accurate hero Japan needed if he was bogged down with worry.

The thought only occurred to him one night while you were gently massaging and preening his crimson feathers. Each plume had enhanced senses, allowing him to hear the gentle murmurs of praise perfectly clear. It was an ability that made him great for espionage and spy work, filthy things that he preferred not to mention. 

Your words of him needing to be a little selfish echoed in his mind. 

“Baby?” 

“Yeah?” Your head popped up from the curtain of wings, lips tugging into a small smile. “Everything okay?”

Keigo turned so that he was facing you, the comforter under him folding messily, blankets splaying off the edges of the bed. “mm…you know how I always worry about you during patrol?”

His hand reached to cup your cheek, thumb rubbing the tinted hue as you looked up curiously. It was completely quiet aside from the light chirping of crickets outside and the sound of cars passing every now and then down the street. He can hear the slightest hitch in your voice. 

“Yeah, and I recall telling you how you didn’t need to worry so much,” You said jokingly, and then with a serious note said “what about it? Are those thoughts a little too loud tonight?”

“Just thinking, I want..I want to give you a part of me, to keep you safe.” His hands nervously ran through his locks and his lips twisted into an almost imperceptible nervous pout. He reached for his back, plucking one of his smaller feathers and lightly tucked it behind your ear. “You’ve always looked so pretty in red.” 

Your face was flushed, preferring to look at the ruffled blanket that was on the verge of falling off the bed. “A-are…are you sure? I know how much these feathers mean to you-”

“Please,” he insists with a small kiss to the crown of your head, “I wanna keep you safe, no matter how far away I am.”

His voice was earnest. 

Vulnerability felt like the frigid wind as it roared in his ears uncomfortably loud. But as inconvenient as it was, loving you was worth the bother. 

[astrologydray]

When your Sun sign matches your Moon sign 🌞🌚

When your Sun sign matches your Moon sign, your core identity (Sun) and emotional self (Moon) are in sync. That means who you are publicly and who you are in private feel like one voice, one vibe, one frequency. You’re emotionally consistent, and while that can make you powerful and self-aware, it can also amplify your blind spots or emotional patterns. It’s like turning the volume all the way up on your Sun sign

——Aries Sun & Aries Moon——

You’re a wildfire in human form. With both your Sun and Moon in Aries, your identity and your emotional world are fiery, instinctive, and fiercely independent. You don’t just act on impulse — your feelings are impulsive. When you’re excited, you light up like a match. When you’re angry, it’s volcanic. But the blessing here is how honest you are about it. There’s no emotional confusion with you — what you feel is what you do, and you rarely suppress it. You’re bold inside and out.

However, this can create a kind of emotional impatience. You want what you want now, and you may struggle with delayed gratification or sitting still in discomfort. You might get bored in relationships that don’t keep your fire lit. But when you find healthy ways to channel your energy — through leadership, movement, competition, or passion projects — you become a powerhouse of courage. You were born to initiate, to inspire, and to lead by example. People watch you because you remind them how to feel alive.

—Taurus Sun & Taurus Moon—

You are the living embodiment of grounded grace. Taurus Sun and Moon together create a person who is steady, sensual, and built for the long game. Your identity and emotions both prioritize comfort, consistency, and security. You’re emotionally slow to warm, but once you’re in — with a person, a job, a routine — you’re all in. People trust you because your vibe is calm and your reactions are measured. There’s something ancient and wise about the way you move — like you’ve been here before and learned that rushing ruins everything.

But your double Taurus nature can also make you emotionally stubborn. You may avoid change to the point of stagnation, or hold onto relationships and habits that no longer serve you because they feel “safe.” The lesson here is to learn how to let go with grace and trust the unknown. When you do, your emotional world becomes a sanctuary — not just for yourself, but for everyone around you. You make people feel like they’re wrapped in velvet and fed honey. Your love is slow-cooked, your energy is sacred, and your presence is a luxury.

—Gemini Sun & Gemini Moon—

With this combo, your mind and heart are both ruled by Mercury — and baby, you never stop thinking. You process life through observation, conversation, and constant analysis. Your personality is lively, witty, curious, and fast-moving. And emotionally? Same. You intellectualize your feelings, often talking about them before you even feel them fully. You’re emotionally adaptable, and while that makes you versatile and fun, it can also make it hard to slow down and sit in one emotion long enough to process it deeply.

This combo gives you a brilliant inner world — you’re the type of person who can self-soothe through journaling, texting a bestie, or finding the perfect meme to describe your mood. But there’s a tendency to detach when emotions get too raw or messy. The challenge here is to balance thought with feeling — to remember that some things are meant to be felt, not fixed. When you do that, you become a storyteller of the soul. Your gift is the ability to name emotions that others can’t — and to turn chaos into clarity with your words.

—Cancer Sun & Cancer Moon—

Double Cancer? That’s full ocean energy. You feel everything deeply, and your emotions aren’t just a part of your experience — they are your experience. You’re ruled by the Moon twice, which means your identity and your emotional body flow in rhythm with lunar cycles, intuition, and memory. You’re nurturing, protective, and deeply influenced by your home, family, and personal history. People feel safe around you, but you’re also incredibly private — soft on the inside, guarded on the outside.

This combo gives you emotional intelligence that’s beyond your years, but it can also make you moody, nostalgic, or prone to emotional hoarding. You may replay the past like a movie you can’t turn off, or retreat into your shell when you feel overwhelmed. But when you learn to let the waves move through you instead of drowning in them, you become a force of emotional healing. You’re not weak for feeling deeply — you’re powerful because of it. Your emotions are your compass, your creativity, and your connection to the divine.

——Leo Sun & Leo Moon——

Double Leo? Baby, you were born to shine. With your ego and emotions both ruled by the Sun, there’s a powerful fusion of self-love, creative fire, and heart-led living. You feel most alive when you’re being seen, loved, and appreciated — not because you’re needy, but because your emotional world thrives on connection and expression. You need an audience, whether it’s one person who truly gets you or a whole community cheering you on. Your joy is radiant, and when you’re lit up, you light up everyone around you.

But double Leo also means you feel pride and ego bruises deeply. You may struggle with rejection, taking things personally, or needing external validation to feel emotionally secure. The journey here is about learning how to affirm yourself when no one’s clapping. When you do, your love becomes legendary. You’re a fierce protector, a loyal friend, and a passionate romantic. Your emotional world runs on loyalty and self-expression — and when your heart is open, it’s majestic.

——Virgo Sun & Virgo Moon——

You’re detail-oriented in your identity and in your emotional processing. With Virgo ruling both your Sun and Moon, your life is about making sense of things — organizing, fixing, improving. You’re the friend who remembers birthdays, reads the fine print, and brings snacks just in case. Internally, you find peace through logic, rituals, and acts of service. You feel most emotionally secure when things are in order, and your emotions are often filtered through analysis before you let them surface.

But the challenge with this combo is overthinking. You can be your own harshest critic — emotionally and otherwise. You might intellectualize feelings that need tenderness, or repress them altogether because they don’t make “sense.” The lesson is learning to let yourself be messy sometimes. Emotions aren’t always tidy — but that doesn’t mean they’re wrong. When you combine your natural discernment with self-compassion, you become someone who can gently hold space for growth, healing, and precision. You’re not just here to serve — you’re here to restore.

——Libra Sun & Libra Moon——

Double Libra gives you an energy that’s refined, relational, and so self-aware. With your Sun and Moon both ruled by Venus, you move through life craving balance, beauty, and deep connection. You’re emotionally attuned to the vibes around you, and your peace often depends on the peace of your environment. You don’t just want harmony — you need it to feel safe. You process emotions through reflection, often seeing both sides of everything (and everyone), which makes you a natural diplomat, mediator, and romantic idealist.

But double Libra also comes with the emotional pressure to “keep it pretty.” You might avoid conflict or suppress your true feelings to maintain peace, even if it means betraying your own needs. You’re so tuned into others that your biggest growth comes from tuning back into yourself. You’re not here to be agreeable — you’re here to create relationships where your truth can breathe. When you embrace the messiness behind the beauty, your emotional world becomes more than balanced — it becomes real. And that’s where your power lives.

—Scorpio Sun & Scorpio Moon—

Whew. Double Scorpio is like being born with X-ray vision of the soul. You feel things to the bone, but you rarely let the world know just how deep the well runs. You live behind emotional armor — not because you’re cold, but because your feelings are sacred. This combo gives you volcanic emotional intensity paired with a magnetic, mysterious outer presence. People are drawn to you without knowing why, and you can read a room in seconds. Your instincts? Razor sharp. You just know things.

But your emotional landscape can feel like a storm you’ve learned to weather alone. You don’t trust easily, and vulnerability can feel like exposure. You often operate on an “all or nothing” frequency — and if someone betrays you once, you might shut the door forever. Your power lies in alchemizing those wounds. When you stop fearing emotional death and start embracing emotional rebirth, your inner world becomes a phoenix rising. You don’t just survive your feelings — you transform through them. That’s your gift, and it’s sacred.

—Sagittarius Sun & Sagittarius Moon—

You were born to roam — physically, mentally, spiritually. With your Sun and Moon in Sagittarius, your entire being seeks freedom, meaning, and more. You feel your emotions in bold colors, not pastels — joy feels like fireworks, sadness feels like exile. But even in hard times, you bounce back with humor, hope, and a big-picture perspective that others envy. Your optimism is real — not naive, but spiritually built. You trust that life will take you where you need to go, and your emotions crave adventure and expansion as much as your mind does.

The struggle with this combo? Emotional restlessness. You may run from feelings that feel too confining, or chase the next thrill to avoid sitting still. You process life through beliefs, which means if something doesn’t make sense, it’s hard to accept emotionally. But when you stop looking for escape and start digging into your emotional philosophy, you gain a wisdom that’s legendary. You’re not here to live a small, emotionally safe life. You’re here to live wide, wild, and truthfully — feelings and all.

—Capricorn Sun & Capricorn Moon—

This combo is like emotional steel wrapped in velvet. With both your Sun and Moon in Capricorn, you were born with a deep sense of responsibility — to your goals, your people, and your self-control. You don’t do drama. Your emotional world is disciplined, often hidden behind a composed exterior. People might think you’re cold or hard to read, but that’s because you were taught (consciously or not) that vulnerability can be dangerous. Your feelings are real, but they don’t always get a seat at the table — unless they’re useful.

This can make you incredibly emotionally resilient — but it can also isolate you. You may feel safest when you’re in control, but growth for you comes from learning to let yourself fall apart and still be worthy. You’re not weak for needing rest, softness, or care. When you allow your emotions to show without guilt, you give yourself permission to be fully human — not just productive. You weren’t born just to build an empire. You’re here to learn that emotional strength is about trust, not just toughness.

—Aquarius Sun & Aquarius Moon—

Double Aquarius gives you a heart that beats to the rhythm of the future. You’re ruled by Uranus, which means your Sun and Moon are both plugged into innovation, rebellion, and the desire to break free from the ordinary. Emotionally, you crave understanding, not chaos. You need space to process things from a logical lens — you’re not cold, you’re just wired to think before you feel. You often find comfort in being the observer rather than the participant, especially when emotions get overwhelming or confusing.

But this combo can lead to emotional detachment or avoidance. You may rationalize your way out of vulnerability, or struggle to connect with people who lead with feeling over thought. The real magic happens when you realize you don’t have to choose between intellect and intimacy. When you allow yourself to be seen — eccentricities, contradictions, and all — you become a beacon for others who feel like outsiders, too. Your emotional uniqueness isn’t a glitch. It’s your gift. And when you let people into your inner world, you become a revolutionary with a heart.

—Pisces Sun & Pisces Moon—

Double Pisces is like living in a watercolor dreamscape — you feel everything, absorb everyone, and exist in a world just slightly softer and deeper than the one others live in. Your Sun and Moon ruled by Neptune make you an emotional mystic — spiritual, creative, and deeply compassionate. Your intuition is your GPS, and you can feel someone’s vibe before they even speak. Your emotional life is fluid, poetic, and sometimes overwhelming — like you’re a vessel for feelings that aren’t even yours.

This can be both magical and exhausting. With this combo, boundaries are your biggest karmic lesson. You may lose yourself in relationships, soak up other people’s pain, or retreat into fantasy to avoid emotional heaviness. But when you learn to ground your sensitivity — through art, healing work, spirituality, or simply saying no — you unlock your full potential. You’re not here to escape the world. You’re here to enchant it. Your emotions are oceanic — and when you own that power, you become the dream that teaches others how to feel again.

[kelperine]

“If Jimmy was never there everyone would be fine and Curly would have a happy birthday 🎊 “ WRONG!

Yes Jimmy is a highly reactive catalyst, though switch him for any other man lacking emotional intelligence and we would have gotten the same result in due time.

Curly failed Anya because he can’t make any decisions to save his own crew due to his non confrontational nature. We can say curly loves Anya but it is clear he prioritizes Jimmy over her. He claims to be there for her and then dips the minute it goes against his idea of Jimmy. I love curly, he is my favorite, but I cannot deny that he is a silent enabler.

They were all doomed from the start. Anya is NOT a medic. Her license applies to pony express only and her job was only meant to be the occasional band aid and psych evaluation. A year is way to long to go without a proper doctor. I am in no way blaming her for anything, my poor girl did what she could with the tools she was given. “Anya would curl up with curly on his bed to comfort him after the crash” No she would not, she would sit on the floor and be heartbroken that he did not stick up for her. Let’s keep in mind that she is the only girl on this ship.

Daisuke is the only one to take responsibility, he might be the youngest but he does absolutely everything in his power to make this easier for everyone. I don’t think he has the intention of fixing everything but through being a silly little guy he makes life so much more tolerable. That’s why he dresses silly, that’s why he tries to fix the vents, that’s why he goes ham at game night to cheer Anya up because he knows that she is sad. They might be small acts but it is all that he can do and that is what matters. The whole point of it is that doing something matters.

I don’t blame Swansea for looking after Daisuke first, after all he is his apprentice and he sees him as a kid, making him feel responsible. I like to think that if given more info and time that he would have been there for Anya too.

Just saying “fuck jimbo” let’s the entire game go over your head. Jimmy is no doubt the main problem child here and he is a horrible person for what he did to Anya firstly and everything else. His redemption means nothing. He does not care about Anya. He only cares about the pregnancy because there is now a tangible reminder of what he has done. I’ve seen people say that Jimmy just didn’t want to be a dad when that is not the issue. He does not care that it is a baby. The baby being a baby does not matter, to Jimmy it is just evidence. All he does is run and we can see that by his final usage of the gun.

TLDR: Mouthwash kills 99% of germs but that 1% sure does fuck everything else up.

Don’t get me wrong I love seeing the happy art of everyone but I just wanted to deep dive into the nitty gritty

[mangionebabymama]

i can’t get the thought of giving birth with lu by your side out of my mind… i think he’d definitely want you to give birth in a hospital, but he’d do everything in his power to make sure your choices are respected and that you feel safe at all times.. he’d tell them of your wish to have the lights kind of dimmed (except between your legs, obviously), would braid your sweaty hair and would fix your robe in case it slid so your breasts are covered (you wouldn’t notice this, necessarily, but he’d know you would want him to do that). like the image is just so clear, your lilac robe kind of slipping, lights dimmed, his solid figure by your side the whole time… he would be so in awe, i don’t think he’d talk very much, like definitely encourage you and dote on you but he would definitely be stunned as well. like lump in his throat, hands shaking, but still he’d press his face against yours for most of the time to press kisses on you. i think he’d definitely look between your legs too, curious as always, but wouldn’t be too fazed by it, though he’d hold your hand tighter after seeing that. towards the end, where your pain would be the highest, he’d definitely be trying not to cry or get too emotional, focusing on just telling you how strong you are, “that’s it, it’s almost over, baby, you’re doing an incredible job.” and he’d be so proud of you after. like definitely wanting to meet your baby, but honestly focused on you first and foremost. he’d kiss your sweaty head so many times, and help you get the baby to latch on.. and after your extremely needed nap he’d definitely help you shower, and tell you that he might not want to have another, because “i don’t want to see you in that much pain ever again.” …yeah :P

I’ve said time and time again that I don’t want kids and that I don’t even feel like a typical Cancer because I’m not motherly… but give me the right scenarios and some solid simp fuel, and that pregnancy kink will come out of me like LAVA because every single bit of this is SO perfect 😩

He’d be the most perfect, most supportive birthing partner to have by your side.

He’d advocate for you and your needs, always ensuring that you feel safe, healthy, and comfortable throughout your pregnancy, labor and delivery, and postpartum recovery. If you were open to learning more about home birthing but not fully committed to it, he’d be receptive and respectful enough to listen to your reasons for considering it. However, he would gently remind you that, for the sake of both your health and the baby’s, giving birth in a hospital would provide immediate access to medical expertise and intervention if needed. He would emphasize, time and time again, how much he prioritizes the safety and well-being of both you and the baby.

He’d braid your hair to keep it out of your face during labor so you could rest your head comfortably on a pillow. He’d even pack a silk pillowcase in the baby bag to place on your pillow, ensuring that your flushed, sweaty face could feel the coolness of the fabric throughout the demanding process. He would stay by your side the entire time—wiping sweat from your face with a rag, holding your water bottle so you could take quick sips to stay hydrated, reaching for the waste bucket when you needed to throw up while holding your braids back, and rubbing your back to ease the distress of nausea. He’d keep a close eye on both your heartbeat and the baby’s on the monitor, ready to alert the nurse at the first sign of concern.

He would know when to remain quiet, understanding that you’d cycle through emotions—irritation and anger one moment, distress and inconsolable tears the next, followed by overwhelming fear and vulnerability. But no matter what, he would be there, by your side. That alone would be enough to reassure you that you weren’t alone and that he had you. He’d listen as you ranted about how you didn’t want him to rub your back anymore—even though it had helped earlier—or how you never, ever wanted to have sex with him again because of the predicament you were in now. (And while he wouldn’t believe that for a second, he’d keep his thoughts to himself because now was not the time to argue.) Instead, he’d just continue drawing soothing circles on your back, pressing down on your lower spine when a contraction became too much to bear.

And not once would he stop praising you, reassuring you:

“Just one more push, baby, and we’ll have our baby in our arms”

“You’re doing such a great job, sweetheart”

“Breathe, bella. Breathe”

“I love you. I love you so much. You’re almost there”

He’d be incredibly hands-on with everything—not only helping you guide the baby to latch, but feeding you bites of lunch or dinner while you were busy nursing, rearranging your pillows for the fourth time to make sure you were comfortable, and assisting you to the bathroom, making sure you could walk steadily. That first night, he would climb into bed with you, holding you close, looking at your newborn sleeping in their hospital bassinet, just in awe. He’d be filled with so much love and adoration, just amazed that together, the two of you had created the tiniest, but the most perfect, most beautiful little baby in the world that you’d ever laid your eyes upon.

I could go on and on, but I’ll stop here for now 🥺 anon pls feel free to send me more thoughts like this is so so perfect 🥺🥺🥺

[jstor]

Hello, JSTOR!

I'm about to graduate with my first Master's and two of my professors who have helped me with my thesis (which is a literature review because the IRB views the topic to be too sensitive to be empirical). Do you have any tips on how to pursue publication for the first time? Not many professors in my program have done a literature review and published it, nor has anyway with a Master's or PsyD/PhD at my job, so we're not sure about how to go about it. (I've been trying to search, it's hard between writing a thesis, working, and having Dr.s think my seizures are fake).

Thank you much for any information.

-🦎 Lizard

Hi there Lizard,

Thanks for sharing this with us. I'm happy to share a few best practices/advice based on what you've mentioned, but I'd also love if the community could hop in to share their experiences as well.

Before I get into that, I just want to remind you to prioritize your health and well-being first and foremost! It's great that your research is near and dear to you, but never feel guilty or like you need to justify putting yourself first. I'm sure there are plenty of relevant journals waiting in the wings for what you have to offer when the time comes. <3

It looks like you're in the psychology field. Publications like Psychological Bulletin and Psychological Review look like they may be a good fit after a quick search, but I have to disclaim this isn't my (the mod) particular field. Perhaps your professors have colleagues they know outside the program who have successfully published literature reviews. You may want to chat with them about their network.

Also worth noting that peer feedback can be invaluable, so if possible, have a few colleagues or mentors review your work before you submit.

Finally, we know the publication process can be challenging, especially when juggling other responsibilities. Don’t be discouraged by any initial setbacks or rejections—they’re a normal part of academic publishing. If needed, take your time to revise and resubmit.

[clairewritesjjkxreader]

Yakuza x Cinderella AU Part 1 (Sukuna x Reader)

A/N: I listened to Sukuna’s Russian voice dub while writing this. Gave me some cool gangster vibes.

Everyone would have understood if you shed the “Itadori” name after old man Wasuke passed away, and no one would have blamed you if you walked away from being Yuuji Itadori’s legal guardian. After all, you just started college, you didn’t need to be “burdened,” especially by a kid you weren’t even related to.

But there was no way you could leave eleven-year-old Yuuji alone. You grew up changing his diapers, taught him how to ride a bike, cleaned up his boo-boos, and threatened his bullies. 

He was your family.

Prioritizing your baby brother and his future above your own, you decided to bartender at a fancy but sleazy bar. Although the majority of patrons were assholes and the place was too far from your house and the university, the pay was better than most other part-time jobs so you sucked it up.

Between your job, mandatory onsite classes, group assignments with lazy jerks, and taking care of Yuuji and the house, you could never afford to sleep for more than three hours a day. 

But Yuuji was, of course, an angel. 

He didn’t like to show it, but you knew he missed gramps, and you often caught him biting his lip to suppress his whimpers and wiping his eyes with his back turned to you. He did his best to appear strong, but you wished he’d rely on you more. But the little tiger never stopped doing his chores and liked offering to do yours.

“I can’t get a part-time job yet so all I can do is take care of the house and everything else!” When he said that, you swore an arrow pierced your heart and you almost died from fluffiness. 

Seeing Yuji’s bright smile was the only thing that kept you going, especially after a long day at the bar.

That’s where you met Ryomen Sukuna. He was the single most irritating bastard you’ve ever had the misfortune of meeting. It wasn’t like he was a sleazebag per se–he was actually more of a silent, brooding type compared to the handsy, foul-mouthed drunkards you usually dealt with. At least, that was your first expression of him.

It was nine pm and your five minute break was almost over so you sent Yuji a good night text and a reminder to lock the doors and windows. You brushed your hair and went to your post behind the bar. 

This place was in the inner city, far from most schools, so it was rare to find college students here, but it was a Friday and the end of finals week so the place was jam-packed with depressed people. You didn’t mind. Actually, you preferred having a bar full of university kids over a bar full of working adults. You liked college students. They were… nicer, more polite and patient compared to their older counterparts, who were usually middle-aged career men and women whose dreams have been shattered by the real world. Your regulars were broken and pathetic, and they often liked making their problem yours. You’d “listen” to their ramblings, nod and pretend to care, when in reality their words just went in one ear and left straight out the other.

You didn’t like talking or socializing. You left that part up to the waitstaff and prepared the drinks as quietly as possible in order to avoid trouble.  

It was nearing one am, almost time for you to go home. You finished wiping the last piece of glassware when the store bell rang. You didn’t bother to even pretend to be polite this time and continued cleaning up, waiting for one of the waiters to tell the guest that the bar was already closed. But that didn’t happen. 

“The VIP room is a little unclean right now, so if you’re willing to wait–”

“What do you mean unclean? You should always keep it ready,” a cold, androgynous voice reprimanded.

You were annoyed. And a bit confused. You’ve been here for several weeks now and you just found out about this so-called VIP room. And up until now, the personnel here always shooed away all customers during closing. 

“It’s fine, Uraume,” a deep, husky voice interrupted. “I’m fine waiting here. Just get me my drink.”

You raised your eyes and saw a tall man in a white dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, bringing attention to his… big veiny hands and sinewy arms, lined with black tattoos. 

“O-of course!” Your boss clasped her hands together. “Please excuse me, I’ll get the sake ready in a bit.”

As if sensing your gaze, your tall, red-haired stranger turned his head, revealing a face also full of tattoos. You blushed but composed yourself and bowed in greeting. You refused to make eye contact again though, too embarrassed that you were caught ogling. He was more gorgeous than most idols and sports players that showed up on TV.

“On second thought, I think I’ll sit at the bar.”

Ah, crap. 

“Oh, um…!” Your boss fumbled towards you, putting a hand over your shoulder. “Th-this is Y/N. She’s new. Really new, I don’t think you’ve met yet.” It felt odd watching your usually calm and charming boss act like this. She was the one who dealt with perverts and other difficult clients, all without getting too emotional or stuttering, but she seemed almost afraid of this man. “Y/N, this is Mr. Ryomen Sukuna, he owns this bar.”

That name certainly felt familiar, but you sucked at names, and as for his face… you glanced up at his smirking face. Yeah, there was no way you’d forget a guy like him. Even if you just saw him walking down the street for a split second you would remember him for sure. 

Your boss squeezed you and you quickly bowed your head again. “Um, hello, thank you for the opportunity.”

“You seemed irritated when my companion and I walked in.” 

“No, you must be mistaken.”

“Really? You couldn’t even be bothered to greet us. Bartenders are supposed to be friendly.”

You just tilted your head, contemplating on what to say next when your phone started ringing from the counter. Mr. Sukuna swiped it before you could blink. 

“Hey!” Your sudden burst of energy shocked you and your boss. You slapped a hand over your mouth. “Er. I mean… I apologize.” 

“Shouldn’t phones be on vibrate during work hours?”

“It was on vibrate. We’re supposed to be closed now.” Welp. You were already as good as fired so you didn’t try to cover up your weariness. Yuji sometimes woke up randomly in the middle of the night. He was probably wondering where you were. You held out your hand. “Can I please have it back now? Sir?”

Like you just told the world’s funniest joke, he threw his head back, laughing heartily. 

Despite your boss almost fainting on the spot thanks to your little stunt, you didn’t get fired. Sukuna seemed absolutely smitten with you–that is, as much as an owner can be smitten by a pet hamster. 

It was the beginning of an irritating, one-sided relationship. 

Ever since that day, Sukuna began frequenting the bar more often. Sometimes three times a week, other times almost daily. Rather than stay at the VIP room, he’d hang out by the bar and find many ways to piss you off, like hitting on you, annoying you until you talked about either Yuji or your classes, and asking you to make some complicated cocktail he heard from a business partner, only to then insult it (he’d always finish the thing though). At the very least, he didn’t try touching you inappropriately. And plus, his childish fascination with you meant he demanded you hang out with him immediately after you finished preparing someone else’s drink, so you didn’t have to listen to other people whine about their lives and you didn’t have to make up excuses with the more gropey customers.

To be continued…

[sodaneko]

𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄, 𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐕𝐄𝐃 (𝐊𝐮𝐫𝐨𝐨 𝐱 𝐟!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫) ❦ 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟎𝟑: 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐧 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞

♫ Soko - See You in the Dark

Pull you closer just to feel you breathing, try to memorize the lines // Of your skin and your heart beating, two fragile lives collide // Wanna see you in the darkness when I close my eyes

word count: 2.2k

✰ 𝐜𝐰: brief mention of non-sexual nudity (bathing together)

⭅ back to m.list

Kuroo learned to love the rain. It reminded him of the day he met her. 

Now, on this night a few months later, it is pouring again. The weather bureau urged everyone to stay home if they could to avoid getting caught in the monsoon, therefore the antique shop didn’t open its heavy wooden doors and Kuroo’s job at the delivery service called everything off for today as well. It was a blessing in disguise because it meant a rare day off for both of them around the same time. It’s not as if they’re not spending every free minute they got together, but there was something special about having a day off all responsibilities. 

They didn’t get up until noon, listening to the pitter-patter of the rain and Jiji’s soft purrs at their feet (after he woke Kuroo at 5AM for a can of wet food–an unfortunate habit he established with the cat), sharing kisses and secrets in her canopy bed. It was rare for them to sleep alone these days, most of the time they did so only when one of them got sick, and even then they’d often prioritize comfort and shared warmth over not catching the other’s bug. They’ve become inseparable over time and lately Kuroo found himself struggling to remember what his life was like before her. He takes it as a good sign. 

While Kuroo’s apartment was somewhat neat and tidy, paired with the struggle to fill up all the empty space and the high ceilings, hers seemed like an extension of the antique store below them. It’s lived in, an almost sacred space to be invited into. There’s bookshelves up to the ceiling, stacked with heavy and old art books and poetry in languages he doesn’t know, dried flowers in vases and hanging from the walls, a story attached to each. The wooden floor has uneven colors from ornamental carpets that barely get moved around, the sun and time working together to create unique patterns. Withered lines adorn the door frame from a time when her grandmother inhabited this space and carved a mark every time her granddaughter grew an inch or two.

It’s as if he’s discovering a new secret in every corner, like turning a page in his favorite book. 

Jiji rubs against Kuroo’s legs when they’re in the kitchen together, meowing up at him till he puts him on his shoulders while he stirs the pot on the stove. The cat seems to enjoy the view from so high above and Kuroo gets to bask in her soft laughter every time she sees them like this. 

“This cat is manipulating you to no end and you let him,” she huffs with a smile and looks back down at the broken fragments of a plate in front of her on the old kitchen table. Some parts of them are already glued back together, the former cracks now filled and held together by gold. Kuroo never gets tired of watching her work, of fixing things others would’ve thrown out by now. Not her though. Never her. Her hands hold all the patience of the world, tending to the shards as she pours love back into them.

Sometimes Kuroo catches himself thinking that maybe–maybe that’s exactly what she did to him, too. 

The faint rumble of a thunder in the distance causes both of them to look out of the kitchen window. It is only early evening but the sky is pitch black, the storm and rain picking up and rattling against the old windows. Spooked out by the sounds of it, Jiji leaps down from Kuroo’s shoulders and retreats to the safety of his cave underneath the bed, eager to sit this one out. She seems calm though, which rubs off on Kuroo as well. He places a steaming bowl on an empty spot on the table close to her before pulling out a chair for himself, watching how she puts her work aside to pick up the spoon. She pauses as a thought crosses her mind, a small frown on her face.

“Did we remember to bring the laundry inside this time?”, she asks, already halfway up to check. Kuroo reaches for her wrist and gently pulls her back, urging her to sit. He smiles gently, his thumb brushing over her soft skin. 

“Already did that earlier when you were absorbed in puzzling the pieces together,” he reassures her. The heavy laundry basket sits on the stairs connecting their apartments. Kuroo vividly remembers the last time it was pouring and they both ran outside to grab the clothes from the line in the backyard, already too late and getting soaked just as much in return. They sat an hour in his clawfoot bathtub together afterwards, trying to warm up again so they wouldn’t catch a cold. Her laughter was still ringing in his ears when she leaned back against his chest, nestled between his legs with her eyes closed as the hot water engulfed them, his hand splayed across her stomach. He remembers thinking that this might be the closest he ever got to heaven.

The storm outside picks up by the time they’re finished with dinner and the dirty dishes are left to soak in the sink for later. They find themselves huddled together in bed again. All the attempts of coaxing Jiji out from underneath it failed, but he seemed content with knowing they were closeby. He’d get his fair share of cuddles and treats once this passes. 

“You still have gold dust on you,” Kuroo points out and brings one of her hands to his lips, kissing the shimmery fingertips gently. 

“No way,” she protests with a small laugh, her expression softening underneath his caress. She rolls over to her side, head resting against his chest. His heartbeat picks up slightly. “I washed my hands a dozen times.”

“Then I guess you’re just that golden,” he retorts, his arm wrapping around her form and pulling her closer, wanting to feel more of her. He could never get enough of having her like this, her body heat seeping into him, their legs tangled together underneath the covers. 

Another crashing thunder drowns out her reply, and then with one last flicker all light in the apartment dies down. The power went out. This was to be expected. Both of them are quiet for a few seconds before Kuroo presses a kiss to her crown, mumbling “want me to check that for you?” against her hair. Always in fix-it mode, like muscle memory to him.

She shakes her head and only inches closer to him, her hand slipping under the hem of his shirt to feel his warm skin. Kuroo lets out a quiet hum in return.

“No use in plugging the power back just now,” she mumbles and for a brief second the bedroom is illuminated from the lightning outside. “We’ll let the storm pass first. Plus, I don’t want to let you get up and go right now. Stay with me.”

Her last words seem to be laced with something else; a silent question and pleading. The unspoken desire to let the world spin without them for a while, enjoying these dead hours of the day when it can be just the two of them in perfect unison.

Kuroo tips her chin up with one finger. In the dark he can barely make out the silhouette of her but it doesn’t matter, he has memorized every inch of her with his fingertips alone a long time ago. He catches her lips with his, a gentle kiss exchanged between them, lasting for a few heartbeats.

“You don’t even have to ask”, he mutters against her lips, smiling when she steals another kiss from him. He lets her. She can have them all, all of him, his heart served on a silver platter if she wished for it. It baffles him sometimes, thinking how much of his life has gone by without getting to kiss her, until the sun, the moon and all of the stars set the waves in motion that lead to him finally meeting her. 

When he told her back then that it all felt like a dream, one he’s scared of waking up anytime soon, he meant it. Sometimes it felt too good to be true, the way his life turned upside down only a few months ago. It’s in these moments that she’ll cup his face, not letting go until she covers every inch of it in kisses, one reminder at a time that he, too, deserves nice things. Great things, even. And the most miraculous one was right here in his arms, hiding her face in the crook of his neck and mumbling the sweetest words against his skin while the world outside is coming down. 

Kuroo loves her. 

He hasn’t said it out loud yet, but he feels it with every fiber of his heart and soul. He loves her, more than anything or anyone before. Some days it feels a little too big, a little too overwhelming, quite literally taking his breath away, and then she’ll call out his name and slip her hand into his and it drowns out all these loud thoughts again. She grounds him. She gave home a new meaning. 

There’s this warmth about her that draws him to her like a moth to the flame–and he knows it’s not just him. The way she manages to bring people together in the shop never fails to amaze him, her quiet presence a lighthouse in the dark. He always laughs when she describes herself as some kind of hermit, spending hours alone as she sorts and catalogs whichever box of antiques washes up on her threshold that day. It’s almost as if she doesn’t recognize that she’s the center of this universe she built around herself; the bridge between the dead and the living. The one preserving love, till it’s ready to find a new pair of loving hands, cherishing these otherwise forgotten memories.

Then there’s her quirks, adding even more reasons to the endless list of why he fell in love with her. Whether it’s her grumpy expression whenever she has to do something on the computer (an ancient one in her back office which takes twenty minutes to boot up) or her habit of unprompted infodumping about a specific trinket that caught her attention–Kuroo loved all of it. It’s all part of her.

And while the big words still won’t fall from his lips just yet, he has his way of showing her, leaving no doubts that what he feels for her was true, unadulterated love. It’s in the sound of their shared laughter when she rides behind him on the bike, her arms wrapped around his middle and her face pressed against his broad back. It’s in the warm blanket thrown over her form after carrying her to bed when she fell asleep while reading on his couch. It’s in the kisses he trails down the side of her neck after she pushed a strawberry from the backyard between his lips.

He knows it’s only a matter of time till it feels right to put his feelings into actual words. It’s not like there’s a rush or expectations to do so. They do things in their own time, and right now there is not much to do except waiting for the storm to pass, till the sun brings a new dawn and they’ll pick themselves up again, hands intertwined. 

Kuroo presses a soft kiss to her temple, one hand in her hair, the other on her thigh, keeping her pressed close to him.

“Sleepy much?”, he mumbles with a quiet laugh, feeling her breathing getting more steady and her body melting more into him. It isn’t late yet and it's not that long ago since they crawled out of these sheets earlier, but he doesn’t mind. His girl deserves all the rest she craves. 

“You’re just so warm,” she mutters, her voice drowsy. Her fingertips draw small patterns against his collarbones. “Makes it hard not to doze off. Maybe I’m not so different from Jiji after all.”

This draws another laugh out of Kuroo. He presses a kiss to the top of her head, pulling the blanket up a bit higher to make sure she’s fully wrapped up in it. 

“I’m nothing but a fool for both of you, that’s for sure,” Kuroo agrees with a soft chuckle, his head sinking against hers. The sound of the heavy rain drowns out everything else–his greedy heart, the overthinking, the words on the tip of his tongue. He feels content, safe; like he belongs. Like coming home after being on the run for too long. 

“You know what they say about the fools,” she whispers back without lifting her head. Her fingertips dance across his chest now, until they find his stumbling heart against his ribcage. Her palm comes to rest right above it and in this moment Kuroo feels as if gold is poured in the cracks of his heart as well. Mending it, putting the pieces back together; not like something broken but something that’s worth being tended to with all the gentleness of the world.

“The fools, they’re the lovers and the lonely, knowing everything and nothing about love except that they’re full of it.”

a/n: i love writing Kuroo POV so much and i'm so excited to write the last two chapters to this

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[stargirl-writes]

safety net

pairing : force healer! jedi x anakin skywalker

word count : 1.2 k

masterlist | part two

summary

finding safety in a world deranged by war became a distant dream until your childhood friend, anakin skywalker, comes back to your life.

tags : fluff, comfort, friends-to-lovers.

warnings : mentions of surgical procedure/blood.

notes

happy holidays to everyone that celebrates !

as a present, here's some warm fluff that's been sitting in the drafts i wanna share with y'all 🤍

It began when Obi-Wan Kenobi, asked you to heal Anakin Skywalker.

The Jedi Master felt as though it was his responsibility to find the most competent healer in the galaxy after his Padawan lost an arm in a fight against Count Dooku.

And you didn't hesitate taking in the job the Jedi Council has entrusted you with. It was the most flattering, especially since you will be in charge of the care of their 'chosen one'.

You had just finished your apprenticeship in force healing, so you were determined not to let down the Council and the honor they bestowed.

"[Name]? You've grown" Anakin blinks when he realizes it was you. By the way he was smiling ear-to-ear, you realize he had been languid from the blood loss.

You were younglings together. The Jedi Masters had not fallen short in reminding Anakin that he was supposed to be the chosen one. That title, was not only known to him, but to all else.

It isolated him. As you had been. Your natural connection to healing made the Masters want to develop your skills outside the standard curricula.

Anakin was the one you sat with when no one wanted to. It was you and Anakin until you had to leave to pursue learning about healing through other force wielders.

"Yes, Anakin, I'm in charge of your care now" You answered, raising the syringe to his sight so he'd anticipate the injection.

"If it takes losing an arm to have you back, I'd have done it again" Anakin says thru half-lidded eyes.

The sedative was quickly taking its effect and you couldn't dare to look up at Obi-Wan.

"Well, at least one of us is happy about this" You answered.

Remembering your bedside manners, you proceeded with the protocol.

Send the patient to sleep.

Don't appear doubtful.

Don't make promises.

"Is there a color you'd want for your new arm?" You forced your voice to remain calm as you redirect his attention to the question. Both your hands are applying pressure on his severed arm to reduce the blood spilling.

Obi-Wan was pale with worry. You nodded to him hoping that he'd be reassured his apprentice would be fine. He looked like he'd pass out before Anakin.

Anakin leans back on the stretcher, the thought keeping him focused and away from the pain that was being dulled by the sedative.

"Definitely not gold— C3PO will never let it go" His nose scrunched, grimacing at the thought.

You let out a chuckle at his comment. "Alright, not gold"

The Med-Droid had finished preparing the materials and when you turn back your focus to the Jedi, he was already asleep.

You worked efficiently. Time was of paramount importance. The Jedi teachings hypothesized on midi-chlorians being stored in the blood, so you prioritized stopping the bleeding.

The lightsaber cut cauterized the tissues and vessels, making his blood coagulate and turn toxic. To your advantage, you were able to utilize both medical practice and force healing to fully save the nerves.

You can still make him a bionic arm that would be sensate.

By the time you were finished, the design you sent to bioengineering came. A silver arm with hints of red.

It still looked more skeletal than realistic. But that's only because you wanted to improve on it later. This was only a prototype.

Your hand coddles his cheek— this was the fastest way to sense how he'd been feeling.

His signature appears to you as a series of words.

Conflicted. In a state of stasis. Scared. 

You took your hand back, deciding not to pry more into what he was keeping.

Hours flew and you found yourself in a loop debating whether electric signals in the nerves could fire using zillo skin. It would be the toughest replacement for skin, but it's not capable of transmitting signals for sensation.

Your mind was beginning to numb from the mental exhaustion. Your curious gaze lands on Anakin's bare torso. He was still unconscious.

You would have done your research in your quarters, but you wanted to be here when he wakes.

Your mind started drifting and you followed his breathing.

How is it possible for his skin to hug so tight against his muscles?

You blinked, startled by the thought that crossed your mind. Perhaps it was time to sleep...

"Eyes are up here" Anakin says in a singsong voice.

You look up through your lashes, cheeks firing up from the embarrassment.

He chuckles, then his attention lands on his bionic arm.

"How are you feeling?" You stood up, grabbing the charts and taking note of his vital signs displayed on the monitors. You pressed on the recline and Anakin sits up along with the bed.

"Mmmhungry?" He rubs his eye.

"I'll have someone bring something" You smiled. "Can I?" You asked before touching his bionic arm.

He nods and you continued. "Can you open your fist?" You asked, holding the bionic arm, guiding gently.

Anakin's eyebrows furrowed in focus. The arm abruptly closes. "What happened?"

"That's fine, your mind is adapting to sending nerve signals to the synthetic ones." You explained, your fingers unclenching his fist.

Anakin tries again and his fingers opens up in a more controlled manner.

You let out a breath of relief when you realized you have managed to save all those tiny nerves.

"Alright, now tell me how much you can feel" You instructed, running the tip of your pointer finger against his palm, you look up to see him already looking at you.

Focus.

Anakin was not at all subtle. It made butterflies run down your stomach.

"I can feel you, but I can't tell how much pressure your applying" He answers.

You nodded, noting it down.

Now, you need to test the receptors for heat.

Oh, by the force, why must he look at me like that.

You centered yourself on the task in front. You pressed the back of your hand against his palm. "And how does my skin feel? Can you tell if it's warm?"

Your heart was thundering inside your ribs, you were kind of scared that Anakin will hear how nervous he was making you feel.

Anakin tilts his chin, as if he was really trying to feel. "No, I can't feel the heat" He clasps his fingers against your palm as if testing more.

Of course, you couldn't have healed everything. "Alright" You withdrew.

"This is only a prototype, I'll improve its design after we do some more tests" You stood up, trying to establish some space between you and your old friend.

Anakin leans back after noting your action. "Thank you, [Name]" He kept his eyes fixed on you, as if he was still waking up from a dream.

You managed a smile. "I got you"

His eyes lingered on yours, you could not find it in yourself to look away.

A soft knock on the door snapped you awake.

"Well, don't you look well" Obi Wan comments with a wide smile

"Something's different" He crosses his arms, as if trying to figure out what it was that changed.

"Dooku really got you with that scar" Obi Wan nods his head as he waves a hand tracing the scar on his apprentice's face. 

You couldn't hold back a laugh in surprise.

"I lost an arm" Anakin squeezes his eyes close.

"Come, no reason for me to be rude now." Obi-Wan winks at you. "But since you brought it up, how are you feeling?" He steps forward to Anakin's bed.

You leave the two to catch up on their own.

of course i'd seperate the angst on the next part so if you want more of that, head to the next one haha!

[nekokoaa]

The Agreement - Miguel O'Hara x Therapist!Reader (III)

Summary: It was simple. No kissing. No sex. Hugs and hand-holding only. The goal was to help Miguel feel a little less lonely sometimes. That was your job as one of the therapists at HQ, to mentally stabilize everyone’s mind, including the boss’s.

In other words, you and Miguel make a deal.

Rated Explicit, fluff, smut

4K words | (3/5) chapters

Chapters:

(I) (II) (III) (IV) (V)

Author's notes: I work as a freelance copywriter so I had to prioritize my projects but I still managed to get this done! Enjoy! :) Let me know if you want to be a part of the tag list.

Also on AO3

III.

Sometimes you wish you were mindless—just a rusty cog of a machine in a 9 to 5 corporate job. Simply, a taciturn sheep led by a shepherd, waiting for the day a butcher’s knife is pressed against its neck. It was easier to handle life in such a way. Regrets can never be born when allied with carelessness.

But it was something beyond you. Clearly. The throes of passion had tempted you that night. His hand on your hip firmly held you in place, fingers pressed into your suit. Covetous crimson eyes searched between your eyes and lips long enough that the sweat of your skin gathered at your clavicles. But you managed to resist his heat, disappointing, yes, but at least you still had your dignity—your morals. If it wasn’t for that, you might’ve been in his bed that night, rocking your hips against his without a single care in the world.

Three weeks had passed by and you haven’t had a session with him since that night. You were canceling them in hopes that the fire between you fizzles. With distance, desire usually fades so you only hoped that night was just your hormones acting up and there wasn’t a deeper meaning to how you felt.

Between that time, you had the opportunity to meet Gwen Stacy from 65. She was a nice girl, cool, and very much like all of you. Burdened with the sense of justice with a side of wittiness.

She was popular, especially among the Peters who had lost their Gwens. They looked at her like she was a what-if moment and were impressed by her, but you knew you’ll be seeing them on your office couch soon enough.

Hobie was practically best friends with her now. The late night sessions with Hobie were a rare occurrence these days. Like a stray, he found a new person to feed his interests.

Jess favored her the most. Reminded her of her younger days, and how impressive she was at that age—still is, as she’s been carrying a baby in her stomach while doing her missions flawlessly.

Miguel was indifferent. At least that’s how he acted. But as long as work was getting done, you were leveling up the relationship bar with him.

Out of everyone, Peter B was home to her. To see a familiar face amongst like-minded strangers had helped her settle in faster than you expected. Seeing them together made them look like family.

Because of the great reputation she had around the society, today you allowed Gwen to pull you away from the safety of your office straight to Miguel’s for what she called emotional support. There was something she wanted to ask him—a request. And she had the idea that your presence would soften him up somehow.

“Why do you think that?” When you asked, Gwen looked back at you with a knowing smile. Her hand still latched onto your wrist like a snake squeezing its prey. She guided you through the cavernous hall of tech that led to Miguel’s office, the pathway seemed to grow darker the closer you got.

“I see how you two look at each other during meetings.” She said effortlessly like it was a fact. You let out a cough like you choked on air, already shaking your head to her conclusion.

“You know he’s always leading them—what? Do you expect me to look at the ceiling or something?” Gwen laughed at this, but it didn’t look like she was convinced.

Walking in, you had expected Miguel’s office to be darker than the hall leading towards it, but it was instead imbued with a ruddy tint, and streaks of sliver threads surrounded the area Miguel was standing in. He was in the middle of briefing a few Spider-Men for a mission on Gaia-3000. Miguel always made sure to remind his agents of the canon events before going on a mission to prevent the loss of the universe. It was more important than the mission itself.

The briefing didn’t last long as Miguel noticed you enter with Gwen. His gaze could’ve riveted you to the floor, the look on his face was neither soft nor austere—perhaps aloof would best describe how he looked at you. Yet you wanted to believe there was something behind those eyes of his because not once did they leave you since you entered. 

It was until the Spider-Men walked into their portals that Miguel’s attention moved to the floating projections. The silver webs of fate orbited around him as if he were a sun. He would’ve looked occupied if it weren’t for his eyes moving between you and the projections.

“Doc.” He greeted you once you were in front of him, looking down at you through the hologram of a canon event that floated in between you two. There was a moment—just a moment where his eyes looked soft… but it could’ve been the trick of the hologram.

“Miguel.” You had to suck your lips in to stop yourself from smiling. You hated to admit it, but you were happy to speak to him after so long. Staying away from him was a selfish decision, one that you regretted now that you stood in front of him. 

Your heart thumped in bliss, the warmth from that night revisiting you like an old friend. How inane of you to think that distance would’ve settled this emotion. It was already being stitched onto your soul from the moment this agreement started—the very needle sunken in when his hand stretched out of that portal into your apartment many months ago. You couldn’t pretend anymore.

You fell for him. Regardless of whether he felt the same or not.

“Uh, I’m here too…” Gwen had a slight smile on her face, bending forward with a small wave to Miguel.

“Gwen,” you could tell Miguel forced a smile, fangs appearing while none of the light reached his eyes. It lasted a moment before it dropped to his usual scowl. Miguel then turned around to face his floating platform that started its slow descent to the ground. “I’m sure you already had a tour of the place unless you’re just here to say hello.”

“I wanted to talk to you about something!”

“If a universe isn’t collapsing, or an anomaly hasn’t appeared, then Jess can handle it.”

“But it’s important! I just figure it would make our jobs easier. You know, making sure the universes are in order?”

The rumble of the descending platform had filled in for Miguel’s silence. He peeked behind his shoulder, his eyes looking past Gwen’s and into yours before they lowered to the ground. He then folded his arms against his chest, sighing. “I’m listening.”

Gwen immediately beamed, light filling her eyes. “Okay!” You could tell her entire energy ignited. Her arms flailed with every word that left her lips. She was animated—excited, glowing like a sun rising from the horizon, its rays brighter as the seconds go by. If anyone were to watch her, they too would feel elated by her presence alone. 

But as the sun rises in one part of the world, it sets in the other. Her idea was nothing but grave to you, the dread in your face impossible to hide as she spoke with an open mind—naivety in her words. You couldn’t blame her because it’s possible no one told her yet, not Jess and surprisingly not Peter B. If she had told you of her idea prior, you wouldn’t have come here to support her. Just the thought of her idea could be considered mutiny to the entire cause… to Miguel.

You cast your eyes down, afraid to even lift them towards Miguel. You didn’t have to. You could already feel it brewing, simmering like water on a stovetop. A part of you internally begged for Gwen to shut up, or wished the sound of the descending platform was loud enough to overtake her voice. Miguel wasn’t facing either of you but you could still feel a weight on top of your shoulders, drilling you into the floors, your limbs heavier than sacks of sand.

Gwen went on and on until she was rambling, probably because she was excited or nervous. You couldn’t exactly tell. It was until the platform finally reached the ground that Gwen ended her request with a “pretty please” and a large smile on her face.

That smile didn’t last long.

“No,” Miguel spoke softly.

“Wha…” she faltered, physically her shoulders dropped. “What? Wait—why? I mean—he would be such a great asset to our group and—Probably one of the best Spider-mans I’ve met. The things he can do— He’s amazing , Miguel.”

“I said, no.” And it was final. Gwen knew that but she still pushed, making her argument, excuses, anything. Miguel silenced her with a heavy sigh, fingers moving to pinch the bridge of his nose. You expected anger when he turned to face her but no, there was nothing but sympathy in his eyes. Sympathy for what he had to reveal to her. He towered over her and with a heavy hand on her shoulder, said:

“That Miles Morales… was never supposed to be a Spider-Man. He’s not one of us. He’s an anomaly , Gwen, the original anomaly.”

At those words, it was like a string was pulled, released and an arrow soared and struck her chest. Gwen was trying to make sense of it all but nothing made sense no matter how long she thought about it.

Miguel continued regardless. With the command of his hands, the projections swirled around you three, depicting the moment when Spider-42 fell into Earth-1610, bit the wrong Miles Morales and in turn, the Spider-man from his universe died. Your real comrade.

Gwen didn’t want to believe it. Shaking her head as she stared at each projection. The truth floated around her. Thoughts ran a mile a minute. It would’ve been better if Peter B. told her instead of Miguel. Maybe if she heard it from a trusted friend, it would’ve been easier to believe. But Gwen knew there was no reason for Miguel to lie about this. What motive could Miguel have to not let Miles join the Spider Society?

“Miles Morales-1610 as Spider-man was a mistake.” His words to her were the final nail to a coffin. With the skidding sound coming from her shoes, she turned around and bolted out of Miguel’s office.

“Gwen!” You were about to chase after her until Miguel’s voice cut through the air.

“You think I’m done here?”

You physically jumped at how loud he sounded like thunder had rolled and rumbled the floor under your feet. You turned towards him and immediately you regretted it. What was brewing before was most certainly his anger, saved solely for you while Gwen was spared because of her naivety. But you—you knew better than to associate yourself with the anomaly. If only Miguel could give you a chance to explain yourself.

“Miguel, I—”

He didn’t let you finish. His hand latched onto your wrist, pulling you deeper into his office and into a room beyond the shadows. It was more like a traditional office than the one outside with a desk, a bookcase, a soft couch and some cabinets. There was even a bed that Miguel probably slept in whenever he didn't want to return home. The sheets were ruffled so you could tell he often used it but never had enough time to make it because he was usually always on the go.

However, it was the last thing on your mind when you had a fuming Miguel in front of you. He didn’t even wait for the door to close before he grabbed you a little too rough by the shoulders, shaking you lightly. Red eyes lasered down on you.

Undoubtedly, you knew he was angry, but there was something else in there.

“What were you thinking? You know what Miles-1610 is to us, Doc! You know what an anomaly could do to a universe and you still supported her idea? Did you really think that was okay? Letting an anomaly join and ruin everything —!”

“I didn’t know! I didn’t know that’s what she wanted to ask! All she told me was that it would support the society and she needed me here for emotional support! If I knew it was about the anomaly, I wouldn’t have come here!”

You yelled back louder. Miguel’s talon-less fingers buried themselves in your upper arms, squeezing them. His eyes were wide, shaky red irises searching within your own for any hint of honesty. The grip on you wasn’t as firm as it looked. Like a crane holding a prize, the slightest nudge would’ve shaken his hands off. Despite how he looked, Miguel made sure he wasn’t hurting you.

“This is exactly why I told Jess I didn’t want her to join! She’s—She’s too close with the anomaly. She can jeopardize our entire cause all because of him !” He froze after, an idea appearing in his head. He wasn’t thinking rationally anymore. He released you, turning around like he wanted to leave. “She has to go home.”

“Wait! You can’t—Let’s think about this, Miguel.”

He was quick to face you again, his hands returning to your upper arms. He bent forward until his face was at your level. “I can’t have her risk all that I built—that we built.”

There it was. It wasn’t just anger he was feeling. The signs were all there; His trembling breath, the sweat that made his forehead glossy, the weakness in his hold. 

Miguel was panicking.

It was fear that buried itself within his fury from the moment Gwen had asked for Miles-1610’s recruitment and when he thought you supported her idea. It was like he saw it again. His daughter disappearing in his arms, the weight of her so heavy… until he felt nothing—until nothing around him existed except for what remained of the universe: white light and empty space. He had the blood of that universe on his hands and no matter how many times he tried to wash them away, it was now embedded in his soul. All that existed ended because he was the anomaly of that world disrupting the canon events. 

Months after months of research couldn’t bring him the exact reason for that universe ending, but he was sure of one thing. If everything went how it was planned, nothing like that would happen ever again.

And that’s why it was his job to put things back to how it was. It was the only thing he could do to atone.

So yes, Miguel was reliving his trauma yet again.

And it was your job to relieve him of it.

“That doesn’t mean we should make rash decisions,” you told him, gently. “She’s one of our best and letting her go would slow down our efforts. You and I both know that.”

Miguel’s energy was being sapped out of him, visibly his shoulders dropped and those red eyes were no longer on you as he hung his head low. He released you and retreated to sit on his bed. For a moment, he looked like a toy that ran out of batteries, burying his face in his hands before he ran them through his curly locks.

It was so different seeing him like this—like he was moping. You followed him and stood between his legs.

“Besides, Gwen's a smart girl. She wouldn’t do anything that would put the universes at risk.” He didn’t respond or even look at you. It made you run a hand against his cheek as your thumb brushed under his eye. “When’s the last time you slept? You look tired.”

“I don’t have time to be tired. Not when there’s a Galaxy-size mess I have to clean up. With every anomaly we restore, 10,000 more just take its place. It’s never-ending, Doc. I’m like a janitor mopping up a shoreline.” 

“We all took an oath. A spider-person’s job never ends. Which is why we need to rest as much as we can to fight another day.”

“I didn’t ask for this, Doc.” He sighed, leaning his head against your hand until his cheek pushed up against it. “And I won’t be able to sleep.”

“None of us did…” you lightly smiled, “And I’ll help you.”

You pulled your hand away from his cheek, but you didn’t miss when he leaned more against it for his lips to press into your palm. The brief feel of them jolted something within you like a warm shiver struck your lower stomach. Gosh, it made you curious—too curious about how they would feel against other parts of your body.

And you didn’t miss those eyes that looked up at you, red like cherries, sweet like them too. It was hard to turn away, somewhat thankful you managed to because you didn’t want to be under their spell. You still felt the heat of them on you even as you approached his bookcase. Your palm still tingling from the feel of his lips as you pulled a book off one of the shelves. You returned to him grinning.

He was disappointed when he glanced at your book choice in your hand. “Charlotte’s web? Am I a kid to you?”

“No, but… you act like one sometimes. Lay down for me.”

You pushed against his shoulder leaving him no choice but to oblige. What he didn’t expect was you to climb in after him, settling on your side next to him while you opened the book to page one and started to read. 

Miguel still couldn’t sleep. His eyes remained open, watching the top of your head as you read. A lovely smile on your face as you tried (and failed) to give each character their own distinctive voice. When you weren’t busy turning the page, the hand that he kissed was together with his, fingers interlocked. You were so used to holding his hand by now that you thought nothing of it and ignored the warmth that spread throughout your body because of it.

“Are you finally resuming our sessions?” Miguel interrupted you, pulling your eyes away from the book and into his own.

“Only if you need it.”

You knew Miguel would never admit he needed it, especially how adamant he was about them in the beginning.

“I need it.”

Oh.

“I definitely need it.”

“Then… I’ll put you back on my calendar.”

“ Muy Bien. ”

His sonorous whisper had heat searing your cheeks, not to mention, that smile that flashed your way made his fangs look bigger—so mischievous it had you biting your lip. Immediately after, Miguel’s mask materialized around his head. Much to your disappointment.

“Do you really need your mask on while you sleep?” You asked.

“You never know when the job needs you. Have to always be on the ready.”

“Words from a true workaholic… you said you wanted a family but how exactly were you going to make time for them when you’re working all these hours?”

“Oh, I always made time for mi hija . Always went to her soccer practice. Always was there to read her a bedtime story. Take her clothes shopping. I was made to be a dad but… it just isn’t in my fate to be one.”

You couldn’t see his face, but you heard his pain. You squeezed his hand, regretful.

“I’m sorry—I shouldn’t have said that.”

“No, no, no, no—It’s okay… It’s a valid question.”

Not knowing what else to say, you continued to read. Seconds, minutes, time ticked away. Miguel’s hand was still tight in yours, but his voice came out heavy whenever he commented about the book. His head was against the pillows, turned in your direction. 

Your voice must’ve been soothing him because his hand would grow weak in yours and then he would suddenly squeeze it, throwing a random comment out about the main character, Wilbur, and then trying to convince you he didn’t fall asleep. Sometimes the heat where your hands came together would make him doze off and the coolness that grew when they were briefly apart would stir him awake.

“Maybe we should’ve recruited Charlotte. She really saved that pig’s ass,” he mumbled, looking like he had sunk deeper into his bed, the pillows swallowed his head.

“Yeah, she dedicated her life to saving him. All the way to the very end. She never gave up, spending hours weaving her web, trying to convince the humans no matter how tough it got. I’m sure she may have felt like she was… mopping up a shoreline too but her actions paid off in the end… the difference is, you’re not alone, Miguel. You have us—all of us to rely on, to help shoulder the burden. Please don’t forget that—that we’re here for you.”

You expected something, anything from him, but you received nothing but silence. “Miguel…? Oh…” it was then you noticed his hand was weak in yours and when you pulled your hand away, he stayed asleep.

Finally. You couldn’t help but smile, softly closing the book before sitting up.

You watched his chest rise and fall as he lay supine against his bed. You should’ve left his office but you stayed there watching him sleep, taking in the rare sight of Miguel completely defenseless. You wished you could’ve seen his face. It would’ve been the topping on the cake.

Your fingers brushed against his arm, suddenly craving the warmth of his body.

You couldn’t deny your feelings for him any longer, but you wondered if Miguel felt anything for you. You knew how lonely men acted. As long as the body was warm and could keep them company, it didn’t matter to them.

Some part of you wondered if you were just as lonely as Miguel—that these feelings were just because you craved for someone. Maybe it was even the reason why you sprung up this agreement in the first place. After your divorce, you became married to your work, the only thing that mattered was your patients as a therapist and the people you saved as a superhero. You abandoned yourself, shutting yourself off from the world within your white-walled apartment. It was why you looked up to Miguel as much as you did because he was the one who pulled you out of your darkness. So you were hoping you could do the same thing for him.

But you knew your heart beat too strongly for it to be just feelings of loneliness. It longed for him even when you were this close to him, wanting to be surrounded by the warmth that emanated from him, wanting to be touched, kissed, and held only by the man who saved you, your guiding light while you were lost at sea.

Your hand moved to caress his cheek, feeling the fibers of his mask under your fingertips. You were leaning closer to him, unable to resist like a moth to a flame. God, you were completely enamored by him. Looks like he didn’t need to look at you to be under his spell.

For the first time, you didn’t think about the consequences. For the first time, you were mindless.

You pressed your lips against his lips, closing your eyes. It was softer than you expected; light, feathery and warm. Too warm . It was brief but it was enough to light a flame within you that burned when you pulled away. Your breath shuddered as you inhaled, the warmth lasting only a second.

Your eyes opened, but you found yourself stilling. Miguel’s eyes were still closed, though half of his mask was dematerialized to the tip of his nose. His lips were out, free from the fibers.

Your mouth hung open. Miguel had removed half of his mask when kissed him and you hadn't a clue if he was asleep all this time or not.

The remainder of his mask dematerialized and you were face to face with those eyes of his. Your heart skipped a beat, knocking the air from your lungs as your palms grew sweaty. 

Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.

You felt so much pressure under his gaze, his face not quite readable. You flicked your wrist towards the ceiling and a web shot out, preparing yourself to run away until a glowing red web wrapped around your wrist and riveted you in place.

“Not this time, Doc.”

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[shadowmor]

Alpha!MC X Omega!NXX Members headcanon

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Characters: Luke, Artem and Vyn. Warnings: Not detailed, but has some suggestive themes. Basic summary of the world: Your second species only happens after you turn 18, when you will know if you fit into the alpha, beta, and omega categories. Mc/Reader is a dominant alpha and all the members are omegas. Relationship: They are falling in love/it is not an official romance yet between you and them.

Luke:

Before you two went your separate ways, Luke always dreamed that he would be the alpha and you the omega, although he certainly wouldn't care what you were as long as you chose him as your partner.

But after a few years away from you, when taking the pheromone test, Luke discovered sad news that he was an omega. An omega. Not that he was prejudiced or anything, but it was a little... disappointing.

Luke had never imagined how difficult it was to be one, especially with the kind of job he has.

As soon as Luke saw you for the first time in eight years, the first thing he noticed was the pleasant scent emitting from you. It was something warm, comfortable that slightly called him to stay in your arms. That dangerous thing had a slight scent of mint in the middle, which he assumed was the suppressant you were using.

It was hard to ignore you when he found out you joined the NXX team, your scent casually called him, it was so complicated to have to control his own body to not hug you.

Honestly, for Luke, the hardest part of being around you is when your emotions are a little higher, he can feel the slightest change in your scent to whatever mental state you're going through. And all of that seems to affect him.

After a month of being together solving the cases, his heat became irregular and he's 99% sure it was your fault, I mean, unconsciously it was.

Luke can easily tell when you're in heat, even though you smell strongly of mint, indicating that the suppressant you took was in high dosage. It would have been better if you had just stayed home!! why the hell are you still working? Even if you don't know it, it affects him too.

He has recent dreams in which your fangs pierce his neck, and as a result, he wakes up with wet underwear in the morning.

Vyn

Ritcher likes the minty scent of your suppressant, perhaps because he feels comforted by the fact that you think of the well-being of others or because of your good conscience and common sense. (Which seems to have been lost to the world.)

But your scent is still noticeable and brings a sense of calm, which reminds him a little of his garden.

Vyn admits that your scent is one of the big reasons he likes to sit next to you or behind you in the team meeting place.

It was a little difficult to deal with your presence when you were clearly in heat, despite the strong dosage of suppressant he can smell coming from you, your pheromones still managed to enter his nostrils.

Vyn felt his back burn along with his throat. It was strange, since he was certainly used to dealing with people in heat on a daily basis, he just assumed that you were a dominant alpha. (But he has dealt with those types of alphas, so what's the difference?)

He likes to watch you eat during the break, maybe, just maybe because your fangs show. (Is it weird to want the back of his neck pierced?)

Artem

He already knew you were an alpha, since he saw your resume. At first, he didn't really care that much about it.

Until your presence started to enter his life.

For some reason, he could now smell your scent from the fifth floor or he could tell you were watching the trial (even with so many people watching too).

Artem's heat was usually in a delayed cycle and of short duration, perhaps due to a psychological process, since he prioritized his work life more than his romantic one. Something must have affected him.

But now, his heat seems to have activated normally, lasting more than a few weeks. - his personal doctor was really happy about it, saying that finally he was normal now, but Artem doesn't think that's it.

When he's stressed about a case, he usually walks in front of your work room, somehow, your scent calms him down.

He would like to one day smell your full scent without the suppressant blocking part of it.

When you joined the team, it was a little harder to bear the ecstasy. Because of the daily proximity (you already had, but now it was a little closer) it seemed like your scent was guiding him.

It was hard to be close to you in heat, very hard. He had to keep his distance for a long time. - you could understand as soon as you saw his ears burning when he took a step closer.

One time he saw you so stressed that your fangs appeared. Strangely, he found it... charming.