#just a novice trying to learn a thing or two

[blakeswritingimagines]

Kink List With Quinn Hughes

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

For Quinn, this often involves spending some time together, cuddling on the couch and chatting about what they just experienced. He may also offer physical gestures of affection, such as taking a warm bath together or giving each other massages. Overall, he is a very attentive and responsive partner who always takes the time to check in with his partners and make sure you are feeling good.

B = Body part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

For Quinn, is very proud of his strong and muscular body, and loves to spend time in the gym working out and training. His favorite part of his body is his thighs

His favourite body part of his partner is definitely your hips, as he finds them incredibly attractive.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

His favorite ways is either deep inside of you or on your chest or abdomen since It also creates a lasting visual reminder of your lovemaking.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Quinn would have to say his favorite dirty secret is how much he loves being in control. He is a very dominant partner in the bedroom, but he doesn't always feel comfortable talking about it without the right audience. He is worried about coming across as too aggressive or making his partner feel uncomfortable, so he tends to keep that side of him on the down low.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Quinn has been in a few different relationships before, so he wouldn't be considered a "complete" novice. He's definitely learned a thing or two about what he's doing and has a pretty good idea of what to expect, but he is always willing to listen to feedback from his partner and ask questions if he is unsure about something. He may come off a bit too confident at first, but really he's just trying to put you at ease and make sure everyone is having a good time.

F = Favorite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Quinn's favorite position is probably one where he has a lot of control, so something like missionary with your legs over his shoulders or cowgirl. He loves being able to see the different expressions on your face as things progress, and it's really hot to have your body so up close.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Quinn is definitely more on the serious side of things, but he will also throw in some light banter to help make the mood a bit lighter. He may crack a few jokes and make some silly faces, but he's not one to totally drop the seriousness of the moment. He thinks there's a time and a place for humor in a relationship, and the bedroom definitely isn't the right place for it.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Quinn keeps himself very well groomed and trimmed. He definitely does his best to keep up with any body hair he grows, especially in places where his partners may want to touch. He definitely keeps his carpet and drapes matching, as he believes it is an important aspect of overall hygiene. He is definitely not a fan of having a full on forest down there, so he makes sure to keep things nice and tidy.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

During the moment itself, Quinn is definitely on the romantic side of things. He likes to take his time and really take the time to express how much he's enjoying himself. He might hold you close to his chest as he whispers little compliments in your ear, or give you a little kiss on the forehead or cheek every so often. He wants you to feel like there is nothing more important to him than being intimate with you at that moment.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

It's something that's definitely not talked about very much, but Quinn absolutely enjoys a little solo time every once in a while. He doesn't make a big deal out of it, it's more of a private indulgence for him. He doesn't have any specific techniques that he likes, it's more of a spontaneous thing that he's just in the mood do some days.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Bondage

Impact Play

Spanking

Marking

Praise, both ways

L = Location (Favorite places to do the do)

Quinn would have to say his favorite location to do the deed is somewhere private, preferably his own place. He likes to have a little bit of privacy and not have to worry about anyone interrupting or walking in on you both. He usually likes to set the mood and get comfortable on the bed or couch, somewhere he can relax with his partner without any worries.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Quinn is pretty much up for anything, so it's hard to say exactly what turns him on in the moment. However, he always gets a bit excited when you are vocal and responsive, he loves to hear the things you like and how you feel in his arms. He also loves when you initiate things yourself, it makes him feel like you're really into it and not just going along with what he's doing.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

There's not one thing that Quinn would really be opposed to doing, he's pretty much open to anything. However, there are a few things that he does like to avoid. He's definitely not a fan of doing anything that's too rough or aggressive, he doesn't want to hurt you in any serious way. He also doesn't really like things that are loud or messy, he likes things to be simple and intimate. Other than that, he doesn't really have any strict no's.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Quinn is definitely more on the giving side, he loves to take his time and make sure that you're feeling good. He's got a pretty good skill level too, he knows exactly how to use his tongue and how to get you all worked up. He might not be the best in the world, but he definitely puts in the effort to make sure that you're feeling absolutely ecstatic.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Quinn likes to mix things up depending on the moment. Sometimes he'll go pretty rough and fast, others he'll take it slower and enjoy all the little details of being intimate with you. Overall, he wouldn't say he has a set pace or a set style that he always sticks to, he just likes to go with the flow and do what feels right.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Quinn is definitely all for quickies, sometimes a little "quick action" is exactly what the situation calls for. He doesn't see it as an either/or choice, he sees it as an option that's sometimes just exactly what's needed. He definitely prefers regular, longer sessions, but he won't say no to a shorter one if that's what the moment calls for. He doesn't mind either way, as long as he's getting a bit of action in, he's happy.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Quinn loves to try new things and take risks, he's not one to do things the same way over and over again. He always likes to keep things spicy and exciting, and he wouldn't mind trying something out in a place or situation that's a bit different than usual. He's not afraid to take a risk if it means that things will be extra exciting and feel a little more risque for the both of you.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Quinn is definitely pretty high energy when it comes to things like this, he's not one to slow down easily. He can definitely go a few rounds without getting tired or needing a break, and he's got a pretty high stamina so he'll keep going for quite a while. He'll only stop when he feels like you are also getting worn out, he doesn't want to push it too far.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Quinn's definitely got a few toys that he likes to use when the mood strikes. He doesn't use them all the time, it depends on what he's feeling like, but he does enjoy the occasional toy session. He doesn't mind using them on himself, or on a partner, or maybe even a little bit of both together.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Quinn definitely loves to tease, he gets a real kick out of getting you all worked up and then not following up with anything. He likes to make you want more, to get your brain all foggy with desire, but then he stops before giving you what you really need. It's a form of torture he really gets off on.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He has a tendency to make a pretty nice mess of sounds, ranging from soft grunts and moans to louder, more guttural sounds. He's not necessarily super loud, he's not a screamer, but he definitely doesn't hold back and make sure you hear what's going on.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Quinn actually has a bit of an exhibitionist streak. He loves the idea of doing something intimate and passionate in a public place, maybe somewhere hidden but where there's always the risk of getting caught. He gets a rush from just the thought of having something so intimate and forbidden in a place where people could walk by at any moment.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

It's about seven inches long. The shaft is fairly thick, not too skinny but not overly bulky either. There's a bit of a curve to it, making it stand out a little when hard. The head is quite pronounced, almost like a mushroom cap, and there's a small slit right in the center that glistens whenever he's excited.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

He's got a pretty healthy and active libido, and he definitely needs a bit of a release every now and then. He'll often get a bit restless and antsy if he doesn't have a good way to take care of himself, and he'll definitely start to look for a little bit of action from time to time.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He usually feels pretty satisfied after a good session, and he can definitely fall asleep pretty quickly afterwards. He'll wrap his arms or legs around you, pull you closer to his chest, and just doze off after a good bit of physical activity.

[return-of-a-space-cowboy]

Platonic Yandere DIO and daughter reader (who was abandoned at his house as a baby)

Hi thank you for the request, this is my first platonic request so I hope it's alright.

Familial Yandere Dio

At first Dio simply wanted to leave the child where they were but something compelled him to take the child. Maybe a small part of him thinks back on his childhood and takes pity. However he has no need for the weak so he uses a fragment of the stand arrow on the baby to prove their worthiness. The child doesn't die so he decides to keep them. They'd serve him well as a stand user in due time.

He has his servants raise her, luckily she had her name embroidered on the blanket she was wrapped in, (Y/n). However she still finds a way to get his attention. At first he simply passes her back off to the servants, agitated that this child will disrupt him. However over time he softened to her, she became less of a tool to him.

Soon he would allow (Y/n) into his bedroom and read to her whatever he was absorbed in at the time. He begrudgingly accepts the child calling him "dada". As soon as she develops proper talking skills he insists on being called father instead.

Around the age of 4 to 5 (Y/n) already quite independent. Already learning stuff more advanced then what her age range would. A model child by all accounts, however despite showing an ability to see stands hers hasn't quite manifested yet. She has been put through strenuous training yet still no results. She's also spoilt, she eats extravagantly, dresses in the nicest clothes a child could wear and is given almost anything she asks for.

As she grew up, she became aware of her lack of a stand. Trying to make up for her failure but Dio assures her it will come in due time and that she does not need to make up for such a thing.

But she also becomes aware of life outside the mansion. Asking at first to accompany servants during errands which he allows but when she asks to play with other children he tells her that she shouldn't bother with such a thing, those children are beneath her. Those children would bow before them when the time came.

Eventually her stand manifests. The moment it's know, a victim is choosen for her to test her stand on. When the victim isn't harmed Dio is let down, but his initial plans of using her as another servant are far gone.

That's when she goes to the piano, something she was still a novice in but now could play it like a professional.

She is able to figure out she has the power to absorb information and skills from others. Not a powerful stand but a useful one nevertheless. A stand dubbed Gates of Babylon, a physical manifestation of her desire of knowledge.

So it becomes a regular occurrence that Dio will let her use her stand on his victims before he drinks them dry. An odd form of father daughter bonding (of course away from (Y/n)).

Still (Y/n) never quite lost interest in the outside world. One day she manages to sneak out by herself. Of course when he discovers this he's mortified, but hides it the best he can from his servants as he tells them to find her.

Of course she's found and brought back. If she has injury, even just a scrape he'll use it as justification. She's only mortal compared to him. All manner of things could happen to her. The moment that it is just the two of them he scolds her. Even goes on about how vulnerable she is and what compelled her to leave with everything she has.

Everything is a lot more tightly run. Constantly monitored, constantly given more and more things to entertain her. He's also taking more time to spend with her directly.

Telling them always that he's the only one that she should trust 100%, that people will try to harm or take advantage of her. God forbid he brings up his childhood as an example, that he actually acknowledge his prior humanity to another soul.

[leonkennedybreedingkink]

EVERYBODY KNOWS

drug dealer!leon kennedy x reader

tags: dubcon (reader is a little high when y’all fuck), toxic relationship, drugs, implied/referenced cheating. frankly it’s inconsistent but this has been burning a hole thru my drafts. sorry for the discourse btw. title from everybody knows by leonard cohen.

Stay away from him, everyone said. He’s bad news, he spends more time counting money and sniffing and smoking than he does fucking or answering your texts.

Unlike him, you’re a good dog, you come when he calls (most times). He learned the hard way that you like to keep a normal bedtime after having to fuck his fist two months in a row, poor man.

We’ll get one thing straight: he’s not yours, you’re not his.

Frankly, Leon pisses you off most times. He doesn’t do shit, he just goes to the mall to hang out when he’s not selling drugs, not that those two intersect.

He learned that you’re not easily cowed the hard way too, after you called him a stupid fuck because he didn’t like that you came over wearing sweatpants all the time. He’s not yours, you’re not his, and Leon’s smarter than he portrays himself because he toned it down after that.

You think that if you two ever got in a fight, you’d win because he’d let you and he’d told you he doesn’t hit girls.

It’s not like he has a bridge in New York to sell you, just weed or coke or whatever benzos he can get his hands on, so you generally trust that he says what he means.

He’s not slick either, not with the way you sometimes catch him looking at you or how he seeks you out in a crowd, but neither of you are looking for commitment, at least, that’s what he says.

Leon’s not so bad when he’s high, but it depends on what he’s on, in his opinion. Coke makes him too hyper, weed makes him feel too sluggish, why not mix it and get the best of the both worlds? He thinks you’re uptight, just a little, that’s why he invites you to do a little speedball with him.

You’re always down to try anything twice, so you shrug, watching slim and clumsy fingers put together the weed and coke before he passes it to you and you try it.

It’s not half bad, actually. You’re calm, but alert. You see why he mixes the two—up until you feel like you’re melting through the couch, slumping against it and groaning softly.

Leon built up a tolerance, watching you try to get your bearings as he sits straight on the couch, thick thighs spread and rubbing your ankle. “Poor baby.” He muses, tracing a thumbnail on the notch of your ankle bone.

You say nothing in response, scrubbing a palm over your face and checking your pulse because you can be a little paranoid at the end of the day.

Leon tuts, reaching over and pulling your hand away from your neck. “Jesus, you’re fine. I got narcan on me, anyway.”

Not like he’d call the cops, he has more than enough product to be thrown under the jail without a trial or anything.

You swipe at his hand irritatedly, brows furrowing like an angry kitten. Leon rolls his eyes, tugging you closer with the hand on your ankle and rubbing your shin. You groan as the room swims, shutting your eyes to fight the vertigo. “Stay with me, babydoll. You’re fine.”

You scoff. “Excuse me for being a novice to speedballing. Only time I’ve seen it is Breaking Bad.”

Of course. Leon finds himself smiling anyway, patting your knee. Your cotton shorts rode up when he pulled you over, exposing the dark green and white stripes of your underwear, Leon’s eyes stick to the sight and he swallows, mouth feeling dry and too wet at the same time.

You don’t protest when he gently maneuvers you into all fours, knees digging divots into the upholstery and shaky elbows holding you up. Leon shoves one hand up your shirt and pushes down his sweatpants with the other.

What a lucky day to be commando.

Leon sighs when he pushes in, pulling a pink lower lip between his teeth to muffle himself. It’s not like he has roommates, but he’s still shy about being noisy, especially around you. You seem to like it, but still.

You shudder, perky ass tucking in and back rounding out. Jesus, he’s not even all the way in yet and you’re acting up. He tuts, gently coaxing your back to straighten out with a hand on the curve of it pressing down. He thinks he hears your back crack. “That’s it, that’s my baby.”

You seem to dislike that, because you make a displeased groan. Doesn’t matter, your cunt speaks for you with the way you squeeze around him.

Leon counts to ten so this doesn’t end too early, God, that’s lame. He presses down again when your back fights to round up, his other hand on the nape of your neck pushing your top half down a little more.

You fight to stay upright, but the coke and weed made you a little too uncoordinated, your hand slipping off the couch and your other braced beneath you, left arm bent at an awkward angle.

Leon draws back with a soft hiss, the hand on your nape shifting to the curve of your waist. “Sorry, baby.”

He chortles quietly when you smack him in the thigh with a flail of your hand, rolling his hips to hear your muffled moan into the upholstery.

When your head turns, he sees a thin string of drool connecting your mouth to his couch, a little puddle beneath the corner.

He’s sure you’re a little too high to enjoy this as he thrusts steadily, an orgasm licking up his spine slowly. All the times you two have fucked, it’s been bombs, fireworks. Coke refined into crack. Head high, versus the little body high of right now.

He pushes up your baggy shirt, hands roaming slowly up and down the shape of you. He doesn’t even realize he’s speaking until he watches your eyes blink open. “You’re so—fuck, shit—you’re so fuckin’ sexy.”

You, in the speedball haze, recognize that he’s just blabbering because he’s pussy drunk. Again, common occurrence. Even so, you’re a little flattered.

He reaches down, fumbling with your slick clit and kissing the nape of your neck. Painted toes curl into the upholstery as your brows furrow, groaning gutturally, almost inaudible as you squeeze around him.

Leon curses and bites your shoulder as he comes, whimpering into your shirt and skin. He pulls out and lays back, catching his breath as you roll to the side.

See? He can be sweet, he gets up and cleans you gently, then the stain on the couch.

God, Leon’s pissing you off lately. He should have some damn respect for the woman he empties his balls into, and yet. You’re this close to just cutting and running as you angrily put on makeup in his bathroom.

Seriously, he forgets himself. Asking you who that man is in your phone (none of his fucking business), telling you not to wear that see-through top he first met you in, telling you what you can and can’t do, who you can’t and can’t fuck.

“It’s not like we’re together, Leon.” You tell him as you lean into the mirror, winging up your eyeliner pen. Fuck, you did that wrong. You grab a q-tip, stick it in your mouth, and use that to clean up the line.

You watch through the mirror as Leon rolls his eyes. “You know that we are, though. The only one I’m fucking lately is you.”

You scoff, cleaning up one eye and doing the other. “Maybe you should find some other bitches to put in your roster. Shit, maybe you should have a roster.”

Leon’s shoulders straighten, that little barb making its mark. “Don’t fucking say that.” Leon snaps, stepping a little closer and leaning against the wall, corded arms folding across his chest.

You snort and say nothing, focusing on getting your eyeliner even. Sisters, not twins.

“Don’t snort as if something’s fucking funny. It’s not.” Leon comes a little closer, arms unfolding.

“And what are you gonna do about it?” You goad, straightening up and capping the eyeliner pen. “Pussy.”

Your temple smacks into the wall and your vision wavers. You groan, one hand moving to clutch your head before Leon shoves you down, elbow and hip smacking on the tile. “You fucking bitch.” He hisses, crouching down. “See what you do to me?”

God, doesn’t that sound familiar, that’s his favorite line when you’re flirting with him in public and he puts your hand over his nonexistent bulge.

“Look at what you make me into.” He smacks you across the face hard enough to bring tears to your eyes. Leon grabs your jaw, hands shaking with rage. “Is this what you wanted? Happy, now?” He shakes you a little bit after the first question, pupils blown wide as he sneers down at you.

When you shake your head, your eyeliner and mascara smeared, he lets go, getting up and hauling you to your feet.

Leon sits you on the closed toilet lid, leaving and grabbing you an ice pack from the fridge. He holds it to your temple and watches a bruise bloom on your shoulder, sickeningly satisfied when you lean into him, one hand clutching his wrist.

“You ever put your fucking hands on me again, I’ll put you in the ground.”

Leon chuckles quietly, patting your cheek a little harder than usual. “Not if I do it first.”

You think he loves you the way a bruise loves a peach.

[insomniactic-daydream]

Father’s Daughter- Iida x Reader

Summary: Y/n Aizawa follows Iida to his internship in Hosu. During his fight with Stain, Iida learns the truth about where Y/n learned to fight.

(Might make into part 2)

“Don’t do it.”

Iida sighs closing the locker to his hero suit, case in hand. Ready for student hero internships.

“Y/n. Must I remind you that internships are mandatory. Regardless of how you feel about me going, you’ll have to bear it.” He says in a sickly sweet tone.

His smile never reaching his eyes.

Yours and Iida relationship started rocky. First interactions started with an argument on the best route for the villains vs hero assignment in the beginning of the year.

Although everyone appreciated the villain gimmick Iida played and staying safe, you wished for a more direct method.

After all, you know better than anyone that villains never sit still.

Nonetheless, respect for each other was still there. You even helped each during the attack on the USJ. Casually bickering throughout lunch, sometimes playful, other time not.

“You should know better to think I’m an idiot Iida.” You say with a frown and glare upon your face.

Iida finds your stoic personality frightening at times, and how it’s complete 360 from your quirk perceives you.

Long shimmering wings made of crystal give you a soft appearance, beautiful even, making people underestimate you at the sports festival. But Iida already knew better since his first team up with you.

You’re a killer- in a sense of hero work that is.

Your moves are effortless, as if you’ve been fighting amongst pros for years, having a stealth to your moves. Not to mention crystals are quite sharp when you’re wielding them.

He always thought his classmates and him looked like novices beside you.

Iida is just glad you weren’t a villain with those sense of skills. However he does wonder how you managed to know so much at a young age.

He also didn’t like lying to you, but he had to shake you off his trail somehow.

“I have zero clue what your insinuating, Y/n. Now it best you hurry. You know better than anyone that Mr. Aizawa doesn’t like to wait. It’s gracious enough he’s sending us off at the train station.” Iida says while closing the locker.

You sigh, knowing it was no use trying to get an answer outta him.

“I suppose you’re right.” You say while grabbing your gear from the locker beside him.

As much as Iida wanted to leave and avoid further discussion, there was still one thing he wanted answered.

“So who are you interning with? You were being very secretive about it for the past week.” He asks trailing beside you as you both walk towards the others waiting for the train station.

“I wouldn’t call being indecisive ‘secretive’, Iida. I’ve only made my decision two days ago. I’m glad Manual still wanted to take me on given the wait.” You say casually.

Iida stiffens. Looks like he won’t be unattended in Hosu.

“You’re interning with Manual too? Wouldn’t you want a more fulfilling internship. I’m sure your father can find you something.” He says chuckling nervously.

“Not much I need to learn that can’t be put on hold. Besides I can’t have my dad worrying about me too much, figured this would put him at ease.” You say staring up at him.

He knows the game you’re playing. But to be fair he started it first.

“But please enlighten me, Iida. If there anything I need to worry about in Hosu, I’m sure I can tell my dad about how dangerous it might be. And he’ll pull us both out of there.” You say with a penetrating stare.

Make no mistake.. Y/n Aizawa was no fool. Last thing he want is for his teacher to find out his intentions in Hosu.

Iida will just have to adjust to the circumstances.

You and your father share a striking resemblance, long black hair, but your eyes replaced his with red hue. You never mentioned your mother and yet you carry her quirk. But he always thought Aizawa was way too young for a teenage daughter.

“There nothing to be enlightened about, Y/n.” He says with a frown avoiding your gaze. His grip on his suitcase tightening

You let out a hum “Good.”

You both knew better than to know that was a lie.

“Villains appeared? Don’t worry I can head there right now.” Manual says into his coms and the fiery blaze rages over the city. You and Iida along side him waiting for his commands.

Manual turns his head to the both of you, but his body doesn’t turn away from the disaster in front of him. “You two, stay with me. We’re running.” He says before sprinting to the scene.

You both trail behind.

You thought Iida knew better than to lose sight of the mission. Thinking the weight of the catastrophe in front of him will help distract him from the familiar blood lust in his eyes.

But as soon as you lost sight of him as Manual commanded you to keep going, ensuring Iida can keep his own, you knew what Iida was set on doing. But the nomus attacking the city made it hard to focus on him.

“He’ll be fine, he probably aiding others. He can hold his own! He’ll be back” Manual says without a pause at fixing the scene in front of him. Afterall, one hero in training doesn’t trump (trigger word, sorry) a whole city of innocents.

“I wouldn’t be to sure about that.” You mutter under your breath, but you keep your pace. You wanted to be rational, but the heroes can hold there own right?

You pause your steps, remembering the last few minutes of when Iida could’ve disappeared. Before turning in the opposite direction to look for him.

It took you awhile to find him, searching wasn’t your strong suit. By the time you did, you witnessed Midoriya fighting the infamous hero killer. Iida paralyzed on the ground.

And by look of Stain licking his blade, Midoriya will meet the same fate as him.

You hold back, strategizing before making your move. You know his quirk all too well to know this won’t be easy. After all, you wield the same one.

But nonetheless you create a crystal blade form your body. Ready to meet your biological dad for the first time.

“You’re worthy enough to stay alive.” Stain says standing over Midoriya’s and Todoroki’s paralyzed body before turning around towards Iida’s.

“However I can’t say the same for them.”

Just before he was about to strike his sword into Iida you throw out shards of crystals his way.

Stains fast, reflexes unnatural as he manages to avoid some shards, getting nicked by a few. It’s no use though, you need to taste his blood for your other quirk to work.

Looks like you aren’t alone in this fight anymore.

“Now who keeps getting in my way-” Stain says before pausing as eyes land on you.

“Y/n” Iida musters on the ground. He didn’t want you here. You didn’t deserve to get hurt after all your warnings. Not one you deserved it.

“Y/n.” Stain mutters eyes widening at your name. Blades stay drawn for the both of you.

“I told you not to do irrational things, Iida.” You say landing on the ground beneath you, eyes kept on Stain.

“You look just like your mother. It’s good to see you in better hands my daughter. I’m glad you kept the name I gave you.” Stain says, his grip loosen on his blades.

The group tenses up at the news. The gears click in Iida’s head, realizing your resemblance.

Of course the girl he likes is not only the adoptive daughter of his teacher, but the daughter of the villain that hurt his brother. Funny how life works.

“I’m not your daughter. I didn’t know who you were till a few years ago. You have no right to say my name as if it means something to you.” You scoff throwing shards at him as he unguarded. He dodges.

“It does. After your mother died giving birth, I- I left you in the best hand I could find given the circumstances.” He says with a now firmer grip on his sword.

Seems like blood doesn’t stop him from his mission.

“You left me with other villains. Your words mean nothing to me.” You grit your teeth charging at him. He charges too, blades drawn. A sword fight ensues.

“I’m proud. You’re quick, your shots filled with intent. The people I left you with taught you well, and yet you’re here.” Stain says striking you on the shoulder. You take his blade and crystallize it before he can use it.

You stumble back at the hit, holding the wound tight.

“Smart move, but you’re no match for your creator. No one is.” Your vision turns red at those words.

“You don’t get to take credit for my success, not when I had to kill my own way to freedom.” You say standing up, not holding back.

The back and forth fighting lasts awhile after that. That until he strikes your side with his longer sword, and swiping another cut with his blade.

He licks his blade and you hit the ground.

“Lucks run out, kid” he says standing over you. You let out chuckle before looking up at him. You noticed the twitching in your classmates hands and feet. Midoriya stands ups.

“Not quite.”

Before you know it your three classmates are up, fighting the rest of the battle. Midoriya and Iida finally land a blow, and Stain eyes drop. He’s passed out and immobilized.

“Y/n! Are you okay?!” The group runs towards you.

“I’m fine. We need to tie him up” You cough and stand up while holding your side firmly.

“How are you already moving?!” Midoriya says while the other two stare. You eyes move towards Iida.

“I use my quirk on myself from time to time, it helps reduce the time effect.” You wince as Iida lends you his side to lean on.

The group tenses at the intense form of quirk training you mentioned. They all realized how much Y/n exceeds them and why. She grew up with villains.

There’s silence. You grit your teeth and grabs Iida’s arm roughly. Uncaring of his injuries, you know he’ll manage.

“I told-” you say, ready to chew Iida out.

“I know. I’m sorry. I was driven by anger to think clearly.” Iida says cutting you off, Midoriya tenses, taking it as a sign to find some rope to tie stain up, dragging Todoroki with him.

“And yet you came anyways. Knowing who I wanted gone.” He said. You bite the inside of your cheek as you feel his breath hit your cheek as he looks down at you. A bit flushed from proximity.

“Well of course I did. Couldn’t let you get yourself killed now could I class prez.” You say glaring up at him.

“Still. I made you confront someone you probably never wished on seeing, all because I was foolish.” He holds you closer, not even caring about the pain on his arm. His gaze make yours soften.

Something unspoken lingers between the two of you. Although you both won’t admit it, you guys care deeply for one another. Deeper than friends that is.

“You’re allowed to get angry Iida, we’re people after all. But don’t act on it. Not alone, that is.” You say with a sigh as you shuffle towards the other.

“I won’t, I promise. I’m deeply sorry” He says firmly.

“I already forgave you before this shit started. I’m not the one you should apologize to. You can save that for those two.” You say shrugging your head at your classmates tying up the man you resented all your life.

Iida chest warms at your words, how you forgiven him unconditionally. Even if others forgave him, it hit deeper coming from you.

“But don’t expect me to apologize when my dad gives you hell after this.” You say shrugging as Iida stiffens at your words.

You were never one for sugar coating. Neither was Mr.Aizawa. Iida mentally prepares for the battle a head.

“Right”

Really wanted to make this longer, but I got finals coming up. Just wanted to see if anyone like this idea before I write more. So if anyone wants a part 2 lmk!💜

[transingthoseformers]

https://www.tumblr.com/transingthoseformers/776401829643878400

Orion Pax who just came into a shitload of money through some new archival system or new translation of old texts and Megatronus who’s just suffered a debilitating injury that has put him out of gladiator work/mining (whether permanently or temporarily)

Orion jumps at the idea of helping his favorite gladiator/someone in need when they meet on a sugar daddy site (Orion doesn’t really know what to do with all this money so friend signed him up for kicks, probably joking that’s broke mechs out there who need a chance). Megatronus doesn’t quite know how to play as a sugarbaby, especially not when he’s not the typical bot for these kinds of situations (Apparently he’s supposed to be playing cute? He’s trying to research this stuff but this does not seem geared for bots like him.) Orion is also hilariously awkward about this stuff too (He’ll learn that he really likes being on the dominating side of things though! But first he’s going to fumble through it)

Together they’re two absolute novices to this kind of dynamic fumbling through it.

(Alternatively it’s a bit of a crack pair but TFA Bee and Ratchet. Bee got lucky on something and got into money, Ratchet is an old war vet who’s trying his best to stay afloat with running his own clinic and with some issues with his parts that he hasn’t been able to get checked out because he’s quietly pouring most of his funds into the clinic exclusively.)

I saw this and my first thought was mild hurt/heavy comfort with sooooo many getting to know each other scenes and them figuring out how to do things in a way that benefits both of them🥺

OUGHHHH I'M JUST IMAGINING THE PROFILE PICTURES ON THE SITE, *ESPECIALLY* ORION AND MEGATRONUS'S :)

I'm just imagining how Megatronus pops out to Orion, and what it's like when they start their rhythm

awwwww

The TFA idea to me has interesting dynamics to it, especially with Ratchet's clinic in the picture here

(what if Bumblebee and Bulkhead were never kicked out of boot camp??)

[animentality]

I've been learning to code at my new job and I work with a senior software engineer, who's a genius at this sort of thing.

But like an hour ago, he was in my office angrily murmuring, "what?! what?! what the hell?" over and over again as he furiously typed on my keyboard, trying to fix something in git.

and it's honestly very reassuring to know.

that whether you're a novice or an expert at coding... sometimes you just find yourself angrily swearing at the program for showing you the same error message a dozen times, asking why are you doing that, almost begging, really.

it was actually kinda funny, he sounded like he was about to start crying, which was literally me, two hours ago, when I initially asked him for help.

it's part of the human condition, I think, wrestling with computer programs and furiously typing in commands, only to be met with defiance.

[yannig]

I love the color coding in Koisenu Futari

Let it be said that I am a complete novice on anything regarding colors coding; but I've learned a few things from @respectthepetty and I have opinion on colors in Koisenu Futari.

Quick context just in case: Koisenu Futari is a Japanese show about two AroAce characters, Sakuko and Takahashi, trying to make a life together and navigate society's expectations.

First off: the contrasts between Sakuko and Takahashi

Takahashi is a blue boy (loyal, steady, and reliable but a bit passive and depressive) who also likes green a lot ; it's almost the only two colors he wears, beside neutrals.

The only warm color he wears is the store’s red apron, which is notably a uniform that he doesn’t choose to wear.

Sakuko is less strict about her colors. I’d argue the first thing you’re supposed to get from her clothing is that she's expressive and a bit eccentric: she wears patterns, bright colors, colorful jewelry, that kind of things.

Overall though, she’s a red rascal. She definitely is spontaneous (if not straight out impulsive), energetic and passionate, and she gets this beautiful red coat at the end of ep 3 that she wears every time she’s out afterwards.

It serves really well to contrast them with each other; it makes sens, they certainly have contrasting personalities. Sakuko is impulsive and demonstrative where Takahashi is more reserved and steady.

But it also makes them a perfect Purple Pair, which I'd argue is another romantic trope they float right through (just like they couldn't care less about the meet-cute they had in the first episode).

Kazu-kun

The first bit of color coding I actually noticed in this show was about Kazu-kun, and how he spends almost the entirety of ep 4 completely standing out in the decor.

Since they spent almost the whole episode in the house, neither Sakuko nor Takahashi wear their signature coat, and Takahashi being on bed rest means he can't wear his green apron either. They are striped of their colors like Kazu-kun is stripping them of their privacy and agency by imposing himself in their home.

And imposing he is. Beyond the fact that I want to punch him every time I watch this episode, even the camera doesn't like him being there. While Sakuko and Takahashi spends most of the ep in neutral colors, Kazu-kun never once loses his signature orange.

(Kazu-kun is, of course, a Yellow/Orange Oddity, optimistic and creative but impatient and careless with other's feelings.)

Which means he completely stands out in the decor.

He begins to stand out a bit less as the episode progress and he starts to learn; when he cooks diner, the decor warms up to him a bit, but Sakuko and Takahashi are still wearing neutrals.

And once he's learned his lesson and accepted Sakuko is AroAce and is never going to love him, that's when he stops standing out.

Here he is in ep 5 in neutral colors to match Sakuko and Takahashi inside of their home:

And then all 3 of them out on vacation a bit later in the same ep, this time all wearing their respective color:

Now that Kazu-kun has learnt his lesson, now that he understand them, he fits. He's stopped being an intruder.

I had other things to say, but this is long enough as is, and I need to go to sleep. So the rest will need to wait for another post!

In the mean-time, I've got other posts about this show!

[cadejos]

ON NANAMI'S POWER LEVEL, DOMAIN EXPANSIONS, DOMAIN COUNTERS, AND HOW JUJUTSU SOCIETY PLAYS A ROLE.

This analysis originally turned viral on twitter. I'm posting it here for archival.

Nanami treated sorcery like a job and Gojo treated sorcery like a lifestyle. I've thought long and hard about why Nanami does not have certain skills (DE, Simple Domain, etc) that'd easily bump him up in terms of power, as he's already very strong. The reason is two-fold:

He never set out to do more than what he absolutely had to do. ("Moderate effort where moderate effort suffices," etc)

Information about sorcery is very gatekept and compartmentalized, because Jujutsu society sucks.

For point number 1, we are to keep in mind that Nanami is a grade one sorcerer, very much the peak of what sorcery is supposed to be outside of Special Grade work. The purpose of sorcery, up until very recently, has been about killing curses, most of which are not special grade or intelligent. The disaster curses are anomalies, and battles with Domain users were very rare until they showed up. They vastly skewed the power system. Remember that not even Naobito Zenin, the head of one of the great clans, had a Domain expansion either, and it took the work of a Domain user (Megumi) and an experienced sorcerer killer (Toji) to properly counter Dagon in his domain.

If domain battles are truly so rare, I don't really blame Nanami for not going out of his way to work on developing one, especially since Domains require an element of self-assurance that Nanami, due to trauma and disposition, was never geared toward developing.

His soul was strong enough to protect against a novice Mahito subconsciously, which is a promising start, but once Mahito grew too strong he was way out of Nanami's scope (not to mention Gege deliberately tired him over the course of Shibuya) and Nanami was more inclined to take his loss gracefully than to force himself to craft an spontaneous Domain Expansion. It's not like he really had the energy to try, either.

Overall, developing a DE for the off chance that he stumbled upon a Domain user just doesn't sound like his style. And he wouldn't do it for fun, either, because jujutsu is not fun for him, and it never has been. It's just work.

Let's say he would want to at least develop a domain counter, though. That's where point number 2 steps in. The whole reason something as fundamental as a domain counter is so rare in jujutsu is purely because jujutsu society is inherently selfish and self-serving.

If I recall correctly, SD is not something you can teach due to a binding vow tied to the technique. It has to be something you learn on your own through observation and intuition, or by joining New Shadow Style. Up until UiUi's soul swapping, there wasn't a reliable work around for this conundrum. And the other domain counters? Old, not very well known, and gatekept by the clans.

Sometimes I'm inclined to believe jujutsu sorcerers learn sorcery not because of the school system but in spite of it. Unless you're already a genius, born gifted, or willing to go an extra -- ambiguously illicit -- mile (like Kusakabe), there's not much the average sorcerer can do, and not many tools for them to learn to begin with. Nanami is presented as the baseline of what modern day good sorcery looks like; what you can achieve if you're competent, and don't have the privilege of relying on very good mentors, obscure knowledge, or ancient techniques. Even then he had an expansion technique, not something every sorcerer has, and he was capable of achieving one of the pinnacles of Jujutsu, which is the black flash; precisely because of his attitude toward jujutsu and his ability to focus when things get serious.

Maybe if given enough time to heal from his psychological wounds, and given opportunities for more black flashes, as well as a strong enough incentive, he could have circumvented a lot of problems and enlightened his way toward a DE or other such jujutsu-relevelations.

But that's speculation and not really the point of his character.

Had he been a villain though? Gege probably would've made him stronger, if his Culling Games score in JJK's draft Jujutsu Sousen is anything to go by, which is amusing.

Supplementary reading:

In regards to black flashes: a post where I go over why I think Yuuji and Nanami are especially good at them, and why I think they require conditions that are in opposition to Domain expansions.

Measuring Nanami's critical hit power: where I use a statement to further analyze and evaluate the capabilities of the Ratio Technique.

[midnight---hollow]

Vee c reefs relationship chart and explanation!!

Vees character relationship sheet!! This one is alot less complex than roses. vees main goal on land is learning to be normal, make friends, and help azul so there isnt much drama in their character relationships. They try to make friends as much as they can and try not holding things against anyone because “students are friends not food”

—- 🐈‍⬛

They both are pretty neutral. Vee wants to be friends with him purely because they took azul saying “you should try making friends” way to literally and they have been trying to befriend every nrc student as a result. Grim doesnt care cus it means he gets extra food from either samples or stale pastries vee doesnt want going to waste

—- 🦋

Vee feels bad for how aggressive they became in the end of book 3 and wants to make it up to rose, rose doesnt care and has already forgiven them so they havent pushed vee away but also she isnt trying to be friends. They get along atleast

—-❤️

Vee: since vee grew up taking orders from powerful people in the sea they hold respect for people like that on land. They have a list of command in their head and while azul is the big boss, if someone gives them an order that doesnt go against his they will do their best to follow through. Because of this they have a high respect for riddle, he reminds them of some of their old bosses and they want to make people proud. Riddle on the otherhand while glad they follow his rules and orders, doesnt like how close they are with floyd and how they will join him in some of his bad habits. He thinks vee should do a better job at keeping floyd in check and thus is neutral towards them

—-☘️

Vee: baking buddies!! Treys offered them so many dental products their teeths never been this bright and shinny before. they came over to deliver some band notes to cater but got distracted when they saw trey baking. trey enjoys chatting with vee and getting their help, always willing to drop some nuggets of wisdom or baking advice since vee is a novice. I think try has a fascination with teeth esp sharp teeth so thats another thing they can talk about since vees trying to get the most friendly smile in town

—-♦️

Both are in pop music club and cater already worked with the mostrolounge on multiple occasions. I imagine they wrestle the closest to best friends on this list besides maybe lilia but i cant say they are best friends because of how despite them both being friendly and loud, they keeps people at arms length secretly. I do think people think they are best friends though. They hang out, vee doesnt understand magicam but they are always happy take help cater take photos or join him in them. They have a blast even if they arent super close

—-🃏

Not close, ace was scared of them at first and vee meant the nicest but 100% didnt help their case. Vee is still trying to befriend him but for now (and probably forever) they are neutral to kinda friends) i do think they would be hilarious in events together tho cus ace would create a stupid plan and vee would 100% believe the plan is flawless

—-♣️

They are both aggressively trying their best. I think they would have good chemistry in events but they have yet to really bond on the norm so i think they are both neutral to each other which a chance of being friends

—- 🦁

Vee does not fuck with this guy. They dont like him, they didnt mind him at first but at learning he destroyed azuls contracts it became hatred on sight. Vee could forgive everyone else for their parts in it but leona just did that for the fun of it and vee will never get behind that. Leona doesnt give two flying shots, if they want to fight they can fight but he aint gonna say sorry nor does he care that much to begin with. The beed is onesided but strong

—-🍩

Uh so… during book three they had a little accident. When the mark between vee and azul fades due to the contracts disappearing vee panicked and when they made it to the place the fight was about to go down in, they saw azul throwing his tantrum with those two off to the side and they snapped. They lunged at the closest one which just so happened to be ruggie and may or may not have broken his leg in the fight. Once everything was cleared over vee felt immense guilt because they promised they wouldnt hurt any students, they took ruggies work hours until he was healed and delivers him the pastries that are to stale to sell (azul lets it so he doesnt have to include the waste amounts in his paperwork. Something something taxes) ruggie forgives but doesnt forget and def holds it over vee but he isnt going to lose his job over it. Free food is free food and eventually they become friends like they where before book 3

—-🐺

They both respect their strength. Jack has to admit vee has a good “sleeper build” and it takes a certain kind of strength to not use your own power to get what you want, vee thinks jack is the smartest of the freshman and finds his strong morals admiring since they struggle with moral codes

—- 🐙

Azul!! Before book 3 vee and azul had a very unhealthy codependent relationship, vee views him and his family in an almost savior like role, and azul sees vee as the only person who knew him before he became how he is now (since they where friends before he went to school). The place they hold the other in their eyes is not healthy in the slightest but they didnt notice until post book three where vee calls him out for not informing anyone about how hes been feeling. Its not perfect after that but things start to get better and i think book 7 and azul finally admitting how tired he is of feeling this way (and vee having to realize the azul in their mind is who he really is) is what truly starts to bring them to a healthy point. I think i should mention throughout this they have yet to start dating, they are just really close “business” partners. I think azul confesses at the start of their third year or during summer break

In terms of how they act towards each other i think azul is softer to them than he is to jade and floyd, and vee is more true to themself around him in return. Vee wants to make him proud, they made it to nrc because of their contract and they want to prove he made the right call in trusting them. Azul wants to milk the opportunity of free labor to its fullest but he cant bring himself to take full advantage especially after the mishap when he gave vee the job of finding students who didn’t complete their payment. He doesnt say it but that side of vee he only recently learned of unnerves him, he expects it from the twins but not his childhood friend

—-🐬

Jade and vee have a complicated relationship. Vee spent most of their childhood being hired by the leech family to complete odd jobs so vee knew them when they where younger. Jade did not like vee, he didnt know what the job was that vee was doing but he could smell the coral reefs off them, he could feel their movements in the water telling him they where quite small, he could hear their meek voice. He viewed them as weak, truly weak. I headcannon that while jade views everyone as weaker than him, he has a special hate towards those truly weak and in his eyes vee was fragile and disappointing soft. I think this changed when they made it to ncr and he watched as vee took azuls orders to drag a student back to him to literally, when he saw the look in vees eyes for the first time as they beat that student up past lengths even he and floyd would normally go. It wasnt interesting to him, fascinating. He did research on them after word, watched their every move, looked up the organization they worked for and everything. How can someone so small and meek do so much damage, how could he have overlooked them. He starts to gain a genuine interest and care for them through taking the time to learn more about them

Vee doesnt really fuck with it tho!! Hey um maybe dont poison me thank you very much, please unlock the door that would be nice, no i dont want to look at your mushroom collection!!! Vee spent most of their time hanging out with floyd and jade staying away from jade they dont understand why he suddenly wants to get closer or why he has become so nice. They dont trust it and they dont buy it… atleast for the first two years of it, they cant help that they do start falling for it when it constantly happens and vee was never the best at mind games, eventually they start to give into his request and it genuinely surprises them how he doesnt do anything suspicious (atleast to what they are away of) they cant seem to compute that jade actually wanted to hang out with them in a dark alley away from prying eyes. They way they feel about each other is a way i cant describe with the colors provided on the promp-

—-👟

They match each others freak. One of them says the stupidest thing known to man kind and the other goes “exaccxttllyyyy.” Vee understands floyds moodswings and works with them not against them, if he doesnt want to cook something they will offer switching stations since they both primarily work on the kichen. If they are cleaning and he dosent want to anymore they will put some fun music on and let him dance while they work. If he drags them from studying so they can do parkour then that just a a free break! I just think they are goofy together, there isnt much more besides finding comfort in doing what they want wether that be staying in bed all day or vee listening to him ramble about a new spell he created

—-🐍

Vee and jamil are a bit tricky. Vee wants to be friends with him but jamil has a hard time liking them because they remind them of him and he hates how happy they are about what he hates. He sees them as azuls gaurd dog, he throws a bone and they chase for it, he cant stand how they are content in where they are in life. Vee doesnt get what the issue is because to them azul an escape from their normal life, from the gang violence and dangers of the sea. Jamil wants freedom, vee wants to be safe, so they both dont get each other. Vee still wants to be friends though, they think he is supper talented and wishes to see more of jamils real self even if hes meaner

—-💸💸💸

Same club buddies!!! I think they have a similar naivety even if its from very different reasons. Vee goes to alot of kalims parties and vee invites kalim to the lounge or to study (their asses can not study they get distracted immediately) i dont think vee clocks the toxic positivity kalim has that most people do, kalim tells them “oh i dont eat things unless jamil tries them first ha ha it might be poisoned 😝” and vee is like “:0!! Jamil come try the brownies i made :D” because yeah maybe it is poisoned and vee didnt realize jade snuck something in. We can try it together!! But yeah great friend combo but horrible for everyone else lse

—-🍎

Who? They dont know each other, they will probably meet in an event. Idk how they would interact though, maybe friends or neutral. I imagine epel looked down on vee a bit because vee looks physically weak and smaller esp since they are often around jade and floyd who are very much not that. Hed be caught up guard when vee body slams someone or runs away faster than anyone on the track team

—- 🏹

I genuinely cant grasp if they would be friends or if vee is scared of him. I think they are alot more similar than different, they are both hunters, chasers, stalkers(tho vee doesnt do this on campus unless azul tells them to) i just feel rook would do that to vee and vee would realize more often and not and feel weird because they havent worried about being pray since they where little. I do think they would get along but vee is very cautious around him

—-👑

Vee doesnt really know vil but they respect him because he is a housewarden and because if they do meet vee would just immediately clock he is someone deserving and demanding of said respect. I think they would have funny interactions in events because vee would def be a good henchman for vil

—-👻

Vee doesnt know to much about ortho but i think they are friends. Met first in boardgame club but i think they both want to make friends enough that they make friends with each other. Neither understands the others brain but they still have fun anyways

—-💀

A duo made by the power of gummy worms and junk food, azul is very displeased but thats just because he lost in uno. Idia thinks vee is a bit of a noob but as long as they are chatting about games and shows he is willing to hang out with them, its fun having an extra way to get a leg up on azul after all. Vee is very happy for the new friend even if they dont understand half of what he is talking about. Idia ortho and cater are the only reasons vee knows anything about the internet

—-🐊

They dont know each other but god if they meet in an event its going to be chaos, i dont even know how to describe it but we can not let them join forces its going to be so annoying and miserable for everyone else and probably them to

—-💤

Vee respects a knight doing his duty well, has had a few classes with him. Vee thinks he is always sleeping because of his strenuous training and work so they will just leave him a granola bar to wake up to. They dont talk much but mutual respect

—-🦇

Lilia is probably the person vee is closest to that isnt octotrio. Vee sees him like a parental figure and goes to him for alot of advice about trying to be human and being normal and just everything. Vee reminds lilia of himself in a way and tries to help, vee takes all his wisdom in stride even things that dont make sense. I debated putting platonic love on their line but i dont think either of them would clock it enough for it to be put on but i do think they are the closest to that. Lilia just knows the right things to say and vee is so earnest about what they want i think they get along and i think vee wishes they had someone like lilia growing up

—-🐉

Vee does not know malleus like at all. I imagine if they did they would treat him like they treat any other housewarden besides leona, with respect and an obedience to his orders, they just dont even know the prince of briar valley is at the school. I cant imagine how they would act in events

——🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🪸🪸🪸🪸

Mk thats it, changed the format because i was having a hard time writing how they felt separately. Prob yapped a bit to much in certain uh… fishy sections but if i did so then womp womp. Here is the close up to vee, i think i might redesign them because something feels off when i draw them but idk. If you have any suggestions or questions lmk ^^

[howtofightwrite]

Just a casual question: What lightsaber style do you prefer out of one-handed, two-handed, double-bladed or dual wielding?

We’ll leave out the Lightsaber Forms from the EU, because they are inconsistently defined between sources.

No, no, no. You ask me what my favorite lightsaber is, you get the answer whether you want it or not. The answer may surprise you. It’s (probably) considered the second dumbest lightsaber weapon ever invented in the extended universe with the exception of the lightsaber nunchaku.

Are you ready? Do you have your guesses?

The Lightwhip.

The chosen weapon of Dark Ladies of the Sith and the Nightsisters of Dathomir back when the Sisters weren’t all dark side practitioners and rode rancors.

(This is my favorite. For reference, Starke’s favorite is single blade Form IV: Ataru. He’s boring.)

Now, I agree with the general fandom that the lightwhip is a dumb, impractical weapon that’s more likely to dismember its wielder than it is their opponent. Only someone with a high level of skill, prescience, and telekinesis could make effective use of a lightwhip’s dismemberment murder frenzy without killing themselves. Fortunately, that’s exactly the base level of skills most Force sensitives possess. Probably most important, the lightwhip is the exact sort of dumb we see with real weapons in the real world. This includes the more wild examples like the urumi, the chain whip, and the three-section staff. And, it should be said, I have watched living black belts concuss themselves with the three-section staff while trying to figure out how to use it. All for the Rule of Cool. So, while I accept its impracticality, I refuse the argument that the lightwhip being any more unrealistic in use or invention than the rest of the lightsaber weapon family. Does it have a high skill floor? Absolutely. Is it a safe weapon compared to the rest of its very dangerous family? Absolutely not. Would a student potentially dismember or murder themselves learning to use it? Yes, and that’s why it’s fun. (I’ll add a small caveat that the average student could also dismember themselves with a normal lightsaber, so this isn’t just a danger posed by the lightwhip.)

The lightwhip is a weapon of the Dark Side. Its battle style would be (and should be) wild, chaotic, and nigh uncontrollable. There’s no way to use it safely and it belongs in the hands of a wielder who is straight up thrilled to cut down both their allies and enemies in equal measure. This is the weapon of a murderous lunatic in black leather, and gets even more wild when it switches to a Cat o’ Nine to bring on nine weaving laser tendrils instead of just one. The lightwhip is the sexy Catwoman reference that transcends its genre when we really start to think about how intimidating it’d be to see that thing on the battlefield in the hands of a novice and, especially, an expert.

The standard use for a whip in the real world is as a support tool for your primary weapon, such as a rapier. The whip doesn’t do much damage on its own, leaving only small, painful cuts and lacerations so it transitions into a means of harassment. The advantage of the whip is that it attacks at odd, circular angles which are difficult (if not impossible) to block and will curve into a strike around the opposing weapon. The rippling movement makes it difficult to see and even more difficult to predict. If kept in constant motion, this difficulty triples because the disparate movements blend together.

Now, take this setup and add the lightshow. Instead of a weapon that does light lacerations, we have a weapon that deals massive burns if it doesn’t straight up dismember. It will cut through everything and everyone. Conventional fighting styles fall apart against it. More importantly, because it is a burning plasma ribbon, it doesn’t need to follow the standard rules of physics. The lightwhip is beautiful in its raw, chaotic brutality, it’s high risk, high reward nature, and I love the way it hard counters the standard philosophy of lightsaber combat with a literal curveball. Any opponent who faces it is forced into new, creative approaches for their very survival.

Lastly, I love what the lightwhip says about its wielder as an expression of their vicious, ferocious, highly aggressive personality. This weapon requires commitment and dedication. It’s absolutely fair to say the person who wields a lightwhip has a fanatical, if not suicidal, bent. After all, they’d willingly risk death to master it. They love destruction. They don’t care about outside consequences or property destruction. They go it alone.

I’ll admit the lightwhip’s true potential is too violent for most of Star Wars and, like most Star Wars weapons, it very much lives on the Rule of Cool. One of the sadder aspects with the lightwhip is that, while I love the weapon and its potential, any discussion of it gets mired in sexism. Every appearance of the lightwhip comes with the sexy NSFW Dark Side Dominatrix bent and leads to the lightwhip not being given the consideration it’s potential deserves.

My favorite saber is Darth Maul’s saber staff from The Phantom Menace, because versatility allows for use of both one and two. My favorite lightsaber form (which should now surprise no one) is Form VII: Vaapad.

All that said, I do enjoy a good Dark Side Dominatrix as much as I enjoy a moody and hooded Dark Side Goth. And I genuinely love dumb and, seemingly, impractical weapons when the reward justifies their risk. If there’s a general writing advice takeaway here, always consider the practicality of an impractical but cool weapon, address i’s rewards as well as its risks, and pair it with a suitable personality. The lightwhip is not a weapon that belongs in the hands of a Jedi or, really, any individual who possesses any degree of restraint. It’s for a character who merrily expresses raw, raging power at every opportunity and willing to risk destroying themselves along with everyone else for victory.

There’s a weird angle with the Star Wars EU where they tried to establish the lightwhip as weaker than the lightsaber (*cough* woman’s weapon *cough*) with less cutting power even when it doesn’t use a physical cord, which makes absolutely no sense. The lightsaber is the more versatile weapon, while the lightwhip is more specialized and circumstantial. Which fits with the patterns of real world weapons technology.

This a long circle round to saying that the weapons we choose for our characters act as personality tells. Which is why it’s important to give a lot of thought and consideration to any weapon’s historic use and purpose before attaching it. Weapons communicate more than we might expect, both via their situational viability and associated cultural myths. It’s important to choose whether you’ll address this, especially if you’re not planning to intentionally communicate that message or make those personality traits part of the character’s identity. Weapons are tools and, like with all tools, different tools attract different personalities. In fiction, we the authors often decide this from an external perspective. Once a choice has been made, always give yourself a chance to think about it from a character’s internal perspective. Why did Character X choose this weapon? Why do they want to use it? What does this weapon do for them that another weapon doesn’t? Or, what makes that other weapon less attractive?

You might find yourself with an answer or story beat you hadn’t previously considered.

Food for thought.

-Michi

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[wyrddogs]

Nosework training update

Had nosework class tonight. We spent most of it talking about Zaku.

It's time to start easing Kermit and Luci back into trials. Kerm is trialing at Advanced and is ready to move into Excellent, but he needs to build more mental stamina before we put more pressure on him. Luci is trialing at Novice and is ready to move into Advanced, and she needs practice searching for multiple hides in a trial environment.

So my homework for both of them is the same: Alternate between searches with a single hide and searches with two hides. Make sure there isn't a pattern to it so they never know how many hides they'll be searching for. Continue doing long rewards for Kermit (open baby food container and let him slurp from it while I stroke his back for about 30 seconds) as he finds them highly motivating. We'll have to play with it in a trial environment to deal with the time crunch. Luci's reward of three cheese pieces and a body rub are perfect for her.

Now for Zaku.

Lol.

So I told her that Denise Fenzi had told me that Everything about Zaku comes from his pedigree, which she is intimately familiar with. Basically he's exactly the dog that she'd expect to see with the dogs behind him. In terms of my training, it means he is sloooooow to mature (lol), environmentally Aware (lol), and I have to work like hell for his engagement (lol). Which are all things I have run into constantly, so it's nice to know it's Not Me. He's just barely two years old, so he is still a Baby.

We talked about how when Zaku actually focuses he's actually excellent at nosework (and tracking), but getting the focus is the struggle. I've also, many times, watched him find and walk off odor. Then it's an ordeal to get him to go back to the odor so he can get his reward. He is absolutely better than he has been-- we've seen massive improvements!-- but we still have a long way to go before we're trial ready.

I told my trainer I'd like to train an indication behavior to (in theory) prevent him from just walking off. My original idea was to train a down because it's harder to break, but after playing with him tonight I might do a sit instead because he finds it easier. I'll need to look up how to train a snappy sit, put that on a cue (not my preexisting "sit"; I'll use "splat" for this), maybe try out clicker training for this. Then after that's solid in all environments, we can add it to odor as an indication.

So yeah my homework for Zaku is learn how to clicker train, and learn how to train a snappy sit. Which probably involves learning how to train a tuck sit.

The struggle to find a toy that a) Zaku really loves, and b) I can use in training, continues. Jolly Ball Bounce and Play is simply too large for me to easily train with, and I certainly can't use it in a trial environment. The Starmark Durafoam has been... fine. He doesn't love it. He prefers going for the rope, which tells me the ball is very mid. Going to try the Starmark Chew Ball next, since it's more easy to crush. He LOVES the Top Paw Spiky Ball but that doesn't seem to come on a rope. That would pretty much be the perfect training toy for him.

What he likes most of all is just grinding a ball into my hip while crushing it with his jaws. He's not super into tug, so I don't need a tug toy.

If anyone has toy ideas, or a good resource on clicker training, or how to train a real snappy sit (with clicker training is a bonus), I'd love suggestions.

Gotta learn new training techniques with each dog. But that's what dog training is for! To force the human to adapt and learn new things to help the dog learn new things.

[gumballavocadoharry]

Like riding a bike:

“Ready for your maiden voyage?” Harry asked, his British accent softening the question into something more akin to a friendly inquiry than a daunting challenge. He adjusted the bicycle seat, though it looked perfectly aligned already. Harry was like that – meticulously caring, right down to the infinitesimal adjustments of a bicycle seat.

Yn took a deep breath, the scent of freshly cut grass and blooming roses filling her lungs. “Ready as I’ll ever be, I think.”

She was, to put it mildly, a bicycle novice. Growing up, bikes hadn't been a common fixture. Life had been busy, school and work taking priority. Now, as an adult, the idea of the wind in her hair and the freedom of two wheels was incredibly appealing. Harry, ever the perceptive one, had picked up on this unspoken desire and, with his usual boundless enthusiasm, had declared it his mission to rectify the situation.

Harry was a whirlwind of optimistic energy. He was the kind of person who made rainy days feel like cosy opportunities and Mondays feel almost… bearable. His kindness radiated outwards, enveloping everyone around him in a comfortable warmth. Yn, who was herself naturally gentle and caring, found his affection and open-heartedness incredibly easy to be around.

“Right then,” Harry said, his hands hovering near the handlebars of the bike as if he were a protective knight guarding a fragile steed. “First things first, balance. We’ll start with you just walking alongside, getting a feel for it.”

Yn nodded, feeling a bit silly pushing the bike through the park like a child. A few kids whizzed past on scooters, their laughter echoing in the air, and Yn felt a pang of slight embarrassment. She was an adult, a capable, intelligent adult, and yet here she was, learning something that seemed so inherently simple to everyone else.

Harry, sensing her slight discomfort, squeezed her hand reassuringly. “Don’t you fret about a thing, love. Everyone starts somewhere. Besides,” he winked conspiratorially, “it’s much more fun learning with a handsome instructor.”

Yn chuckled, her nerves easing slightly. “I’ll concede to the handsome instructor part.”

They walked like this for a while, Harry chattering cheerfully about the park, pointing out a particularly fluffy squirrel burying nuts and a pair of geese waddling majestically towards the pond. He made everything feel light and easy, even the slightly awkward process of getting acquainted with a bicycle.

“Okay, now for the sitting bit,” Harry announced, once they were in a quieter, less populated part of the park, away from the scooter gangs and judging squirrel eyes. He held the bike steady as Yn cautiously swung her leg over the saddle and perched precariously.

“Whoa!” she gasped, wobbling alarmingly.

Harry’s hands, quick and steady, gripped the handlebars and her waist simultaneously. “Easy does it, my love. Just breathe. I’ve got you.”

His touch was warm and reassuring, and Yn straightened up, trying to find her centre of gravity. It felt like she was sitting on a very unstable see-saw, poised to tip over at any moment.

“Right, now we’re going to practice gliding,” Harry explained, his voice calm and encouraging. “Forget pedalling for now. Just focus on pushing off with your feet and balancing.”

Yn pushed off tentatively. The bike lurched forward, wobbled violently, and then threatened to veer directly into a rosebush. Yn shrieked, a sound that was halfway between surprise and genuine alarm.

Harry, with the agility of a seasoned bike instructor (which he probably wasn’t, but he was certainly selling the role), gently corrected her course. “Woah there, Rose-bush avoider! Gentle hands, Yn, gentle hands. Imagine you’re whispering sweet nothings to the handlebars, not wrestling a grumpy badger.”

Yn burst out laughing. “Sweet nothings to the handlebars?”

“Absolutely! Positive affirmations are key in bike riding. And badger wrestling is generally discouraged.” Harry grinned, his green eyes twinkling.

They tried again, and again, and again. Each attempt was a chaotic ballet of wobbles, near misses, and Yn’s increasingly loud squeals. Harry remained unfailingly patient and optimistic, offering a constant stream of encouraging words, gentle adjustments, and truly bizarre analogies.

“Think of it like dancing!” he declared after Yn nearly face-planted into the grass for the third time. “You’re leading and the bike is following. Except sometimes the bike has two left wheels and hasn't quite learned the tango yet.”

Yn giggled, brushing blades of grass from her trousers. “My bike has definitely got two left wheels. And possibly is actively trying to sabotage me.”

“Nonsense!” Harry insisted, hoisting the bike upright with cheerful ease. “Bikes are inherently good. This one is just… enthusiastically supportive of your learning process. It’s testing your reflexes, you see.”

“It’s testing my will to live, more like,” Yn muttered under her breath, though a smile was playing on her lips.

Hours seemed to melt away in a flurry of sunshine, laughter, and near-disasters. Harry’s initial gentleness morphed into a more playfully exasperated tone, though his kindness never wavered.

“Yn, my darling, are you sure you’re pushing off with your feet and not just… willing the bike to move with the sheer power of your mind?” he asked, after yet another wobbly start ended with Yn’s feet firmly planted on the ground like anchors.

“Maybe I am,” Yn retorted playfully. “Maybe my mind control powers are just a little rusty today.”

“Well, perhaps we need to activate the foot-pushing protocol then? It’s in the manual, section three, paragraph seven. Right after ‘How to avoid squirrels with nuts’ and before ‘Emergency dismount procedures’.”

Yn rolled her eyes, but she was laughing so hard her stomach hurt. Despite the repeated falls and the distinct lack of forward momentum, she was actually having fun. Harry had this incredible way of making even the most frustrating situations feel light-hearted and enjoyable.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity of wobbling and giggling, something clicked. Yn pushed off, and for a glorious, fleeting moment, she felt it. Balance. The bike wasn’t fighting her anymore. It was gliding, smooth and steady. A rush of exhilaration surged through her.

“Harry! I’m doing it! I’m actually doing it!” she yelled, her voice filled with pure, unadulterated joy.

Harry, who had been jogging alongside, beaming like a proud father watching his child take their first steps, whooped with delight. “That’s it, Yn! You’ve got it! Look at you go!”

Yn wobbled slightly, her heart pounding in her chest, but she kept going. She was actually riding a bike! On her own! The wind rushed past her face, and a wide grin stretched across her features. It was exhilarating, liberating, and utterly ridiculous all at once.

Then, naturally, disaster struck. Distracted by her own triumph and Harry’s cheerful encouragement, Yn steered slightly off course. She hadn't quite mastered the whole “steering” thing yet. The bike veered inexorably towards a small, innocently blooming patch of daffodils.

“Daffodils! Daffodils ahead!” Harry called out, his tone shifting back to mock-alarm. “Prepare for… floral impact!”

Yn squeezed her eyes shut, bracing for the inevitable. Instead of a crash, however, she felt Harry’s steadying hands on her shoulders again, gently guiding the bike back onto the path.

“Whoa there, flower power avoider,” Harry chuckled, his voice laced with amusement and relief. “Close call. Those daffodils looked particularly feisty.”

Yn opened her eyes, shaky but grinning. She had stopped, her feet firmly back on the ground, but for a moment, she had actually ridden a bike.

“I did it!” she exclaimed, her voice breathless with excitement. “I actually rode a bike!”

Harry enveloped her in a hug, his warmth radiating through her. “You were magnificent! Absolutely magnificent! I knew you could do it.”

“Even with the badger-wrestling handlebars and the two left wheels?” Yn teased, leaning into his embrace.

Harry chuckled, pulling back slightly to look at her, his green eyes alight with affection. “Especially with them. It just proves how incredibly talented you are.”

They stood there for a moment, basking in the golden afternoon sunshine and the shared triumph. Yn looked at the red bicycle, no longer intimidating, but now a symbol of her accomplishment, and the warmth of Harry's support.

“So,” Harry said, a mischievous glint in his eye. “Celebration ice cream? To commemorate your victory over the two-wheeled menace?”

Yn laughed, her heart full. “Absolutely. And maybe, just maybe, tomorrow… we tackle those daffodils again. But this time, on purpose.”

Harry grinned, his hand finding hers. “Now that’s the spirit! Though, perhaps we should invest in a helmet first. Just in case the daffodils decide to fight back.”

And as they walked hand-in-hand towards the ice cream van, Yn knew that even if learning to ride a bike was occasionally chaotic and comical, learning with Harry made it an adventure she wouldn't trade for the world. Even if it did involve whispering sweet nothings to handlebars and narrowly avoiding floral fatalities.

[byemambo]

For Novice Fourth

FYI: I'm also Buddhist (I'm Vietnamese born and raised in Southern USA aka within the Bible Belt) so I have plenty of conversations regarding my spiritual and religious beliefs for those who have grown up with differing experiences. My father passed away when I was eight years old due to chronic illness, so this year in December marks the 17th year of his passing but it truly feels like yesterday. My mother also ordained herself as a Buddhist nun almost two years ago, so I have so many thoughts from my conversation with my bsf about Fourth's father and the customs regarding Thai Buddhist beliefs, and it made me realize just how wonderful Fourth is not only as a son, but as a person.

When I first heard the news about Fourth's father along with the photos and videos taken from the funerary services, I was deeply moved by Fourth's highest degree of filial piety after the announcement of his ordination, but by many of those who participated alongside him such as Phuwin and Satang. Although I'm only familiar with Fourth when he acted as Li Ming in Moonlight Chicken, I could tell from stories regarding him and his family, such as him being a rainbow baby, there is lots of love embodied in this beautiful family.

Many people around me have been experiencing grief, whether directly or indirectly, and grief has found its way into my life from an early age so I became acquainted with it. In the Buddhist view, many of the Buddha's teachings revolve around the concept of impermanence, that our time is precious and limited, as well as our experiences. When I learned about saṅkhāra, aka "formations" when attending a Vipassana meditation retreat a few years ago, these formations can be experienced as the following:

A) line drawn in water that comes and goes (immediate arrival and departure)

B) line drawn on the beach in the sand, seen in the morning and gone in the evening (steady presence into absence)

C) line drawn in rock with a chisel and hammer (continual presence and eventual eradication)

One of our most important relationships in life is between parent and child, as we believe that our collective karma affects our affinity. When a child has a strong relationship with their parents, we grow up with a sense of duty in caring for our parents, leading to filial piety and familial pride. I know how it feels to witness the declining health of your parents, especially in a world where you're so young and have no clue what can or can't be done. With how busy Fourth has become with establishing himself as a public figure in Thailand, I can only imagine trying to spend that time with your family preciously as it comes far and wide.

Being a part of my Buddhist community and getting to learn so much about the Dharma from a young age, it's only natural for many non Buddhists to assume that this period of grieving should be private and that some of these customs come across inappropriately (I've seen people make rash critiques about many of those visiting Fourth at his father's funerary service for smiling in the photos). However, in the Buddhist view, death is only a natural part of the cycle of samsara where the deceased simply embarks on their newfound journey beyond this lifetime.

In a life where one suffers from physical illness as the body undergoes extended periods of pain and anguish, for many Buddhists, although wishing for there to be another way, knows that the deceased will be able to relinquish such pains once the body perishes. Although the physical body may be no more, the soul continues onto its next life, concluding this cycle and hopefully reincarnating into a more desirable realm. When we truly practice and value detachment, that also applies to our relationships with others as we all are born to eventually pass.

I know for many, such a thing sounds preposterous and outrageous, how dare you detach yourself from those you love so deeply? My personal answer is this: nothing lasts forever, but the love and adoration the deceased displayed in their lifetime never wanes, even when the physical body ultimately does. Even though it's nearing two decades since the passing of my own father, the weight in such an irreversible experience doesn't hold me back, but has pressed me forward in my life thus far. You learn to love deeply, you learn to cherish deeply, you learn to understand deeply, you learn to care deeply, you learn to value deeply, you learn to express deeply, you learn so many things about how fragile life is, but how wonderful it is to breathe and experience it for what it actually is.

In a time and society who still deals with challenges regarding mental health awareness, emotional regulation, and compassion/empathy, such moments as experiencing the loss of a loved one, it recontextualizes the world around you, it forces you to confront reality and disregard delusion/ignorance. It forces you to truly understand the presence of others, and one day, lack thereof.

When I was asked recently from my older cousin on what's appropriate to ask or do when someone is currently in a state of grieving, I expressed to her: everyone handles grief differently, and unfortunately, many people who haven't experienced their own period of grief may not have the right words to console the affected. From my perspective: when someone is in the real thick of it, ask them if there's anything you could do to make things easier for them to cope, even for just a brief moment.

Whether that's sitting with them, holding them, listening to them, distracting them, anything that can aid in lessening the strain on their heart, their mind, or their physical well being. But if it's someone who's moved on and no longer in such a dark place (although that doesn't mean they don't experience the pain that ultimately lasts for a lifetime): I tend to ask them what that person was like if it's appropriate.

Some people light up at the thought of remembering the deceased, especially if it's someone that deeply impacted their life. It gives them a moment to reminisce such an amazing person that was once present in their life, and gives them a chance to relish in those fond memories. My favorite memories of my own father have always been about how he taught me how to ride my bike without training wheels when I was little, and that ended up being one of my only memories I vividly remember in detail, and I know for sure that Fourth and his family have their own individual memories they'll cherish for the rest of their lives.

I know from the news as this mourning period is ongoing for the family, I know so many people are sadden, worried, and have all sorts of questions about what will happen next. I think as fans and supporters: keep him and his loved ones in your thoughts and prayers, that they're being properly accompanied by their own community and support systems, that they're given their respect as they grieve in their own right, in their own discernment. I know his fanclub and other supporters have expressed to refrain from posting content of him for the time being as he is ordained (it's been said that the typical period of ordination for novice monks ranges from 7 to 15 days but the exact period is up to the discretion of the novice).

As a closer, I'd like to highlight very important points from Fourth Squad, whose post is absolutely beautiful to read in full if you are unfamiliar with Buddhist practices and beliefs:

The ordination at the moment of หน้าไฟ (naa fai) carries a profound spiritual significance. In Thai Buddhist belief, the accumulation of บุญ (bun), or merit, is essential for one's journey beyond this life. Through the act of ทำบุญ (tham bun) by entering the monastic order, the son generates vast merit, which he then dedicates to his father through การให้บุญ (kaan hai bun). This sacred transfer is believed to illuminate the path of the departed soul (จิต, chit), easing its passage through the intermediate state and helping it find a more favorable rebirth. In this way, the son's ordination becomes not only an offering of gratitude but a true spiritual gift, one that transcends even death. At the threshold of life and death, in the solemn atmosphere of ordaining in front of the fire, the son stands as a bridge between the worlds of the living and the departed. The new robes he wears — symbolic of purity, renunciation, and the pursuit of awakening — bear witness to the truth of อนิจจัง (anicca), impermanence, a central pillar of the Buddha's teaching. To ordain at such a moment is to acknowledge with clarity and humility the fleeting nature of all things, to meet loss not with despair, but with the profound response of turning toward the Dhamma. There is also a deep symbolic meaning attached to the timing. By ordaining right before the cremation, the son walks the final journey with his father as a monk — embodying purity, discipline, and the Dhamma itself. It is as if the father is being accompanied into the next world under the protection and blessing of the Buddha’s path. In this way, the ordination acts as a spiritual shield and a final, profound offering. In Thai cultural terms, this is seen as the ultimate way to “send off” a parent — with dignity, compassion, and the blessings of the Sangha.

Death is the ultimate reminder that everything we hold dear will eventually change and pass away. By ordaining at the moment of his father's death, the son demonstrates an acceptance of this truth. He responds to loss not with despair, but with a reaffirmation of spiritual practice, temporarily stepping into the renounced life as a way to honor both his father and the reality of existence itself.

Thus, ordain is not merely a ceremony, but a sacred vow of remembrance, gratitude, and transcendence. It is a final offering to the father, a luminous beacon sent forth with love and compassion, guiding him onward, while reminding the living of the noble path that leads beyond sorrow.

My deepest condolences to Fourth and his loved ones. I'm praying for Novice Fourth and I know his father will receive his merit and be well prepared for his next step 🤍

[1whore1gang]

it’s the little things 🤍

Hi guys!! This is considered part 10B!

I’m hoping to get some questions answered within this chapter and the next and throw in a couple surprises hehe

Thank you all very dearly for your continued support after my hiatus. Love you all so so so much! :)

this is so short and i’m so sorry

Without further ado:

Warnings: Cussing, Mentions of violence, some sexual mentions but no smut

Taglist: @gaymistakeboi @batw3nch @thedevillovesflowers @almightywdm @ghostslittlegf @sketchyfandomgirl @under-the-dirt @clear-your-mind-and-dream @darkangel4121 @vreselia @llemessii @stargaliz @rockcollector3000 @nottrosaxx @azu21 @kaoyamamegami @vicktorfan @ghost-is-my-bbg @1234ilikecowsthanyoumore @salsasvault @itr-00

“Sure, why not?” You lazily wave your hand as you move aside to let her in. There’s nothing she can say to make your situation any worse anyways. You don’t sleep, you don’t eat and you’re in a constant state of disrepair. Anything that comes out of her mouth couldn’t possibly hurt you when you’re so numb.

She stands awkwardly fiddling with her fingers, nervous. “I just wanted to talk to you, but first, are you okay?”

“I’m here.” You shrug. “What did you wanna talk about?” You slink onto your bed, putting your elbows on your knees.

Tia takes in a big breath before letting it out all in one gust. “I know what you saw, and I know what you must be thinking. If I was in your shoes, I’d probably so furious I’d cut the man’s balls off.” She chuckles softly, “But making you wait this long for an explanation, let alone leaving you without one in the first place is simply cruel on my part and I cannot apologize enough.”

You don’t say anything, whatever explanation she’s trying to offer you, you don’t want it. Nothing can let what happened between her and Price be a write off.

“When I was hired, I kept in contact with John most of the time, and so when a problem arose, I had kind of a lapse of judgement. He was the only person I could think of that would help me.” You raise an eyebrow at this.

“Are you really trying to justify your affair with Price just because of a momentary lapse of judgement?” Your voice, albeit it quiet was cold with venom. “You’re kidding me right? If this is all you’re here for then you’re more than welcome to leave.” You go to stand but her hands shoot out in front of her.”

“Affair?! No! Wait! Just- please let me finish.” When you don’t respond, she takes it as permission. “Did John ever tell you how he found me?”

“No. I guess he never did.” The realization hits you like a brick. “Why?”

“He got me as a recommendation from Commander Frederick in Infantry. I’m his full time nanny in the summers. Therefore, I knew the 141 and who John and you were.” Your eyes widened as you sat up a bit straighter. “So when the job came up, I figured it was a good chance to ask John for some help. Boy, help.” She separated the last two words, as if she was almost ashamed.

“Boy help?” You quizzed her.

“Yeah, there’s a guy on this squad that I’ve always admired and I thought John would be able to help me with figuring out how to talk to him. I just never actually told him who the guy was. I figured he’d never let one of his men be distracted by a relationship.” She smiled a bit.

“So I saw you two almost kiss because he was ‘helping’ you learn how to talk to a guy?” You sounded almost sarcastic when you said it.

“It sounds stupid but you were 19 once, so maybe you’ll understand. I’ve never been in a relationship, never kissed anyone, let alone slept with anyone. The most I’ve got is holding hands with a boy on the playground in grade school. I needed all the advice I could get. I didn’t wanna look like a novice if I ever got a chance with this guy.”

“Who is this guy?” Forget everything else she said, you needed to know if the name she’d say was really someone on this team.

“I don’t know him really, I’ve just seen him about. I hear people call him Johnny?” You can’t help but let out a snort as she says his name.

“Mohawk? Staulky and tall? Scottish accent?” You giggled through the words, which was also the brightest you’ve felt in weeks.

“Yes!! You know him?!” Hope lights in her eyes.

“I do, but I’m sorry to say he’s not open to relationships anytime soon. He got burned by someone a while back and he’s still dealing with it.” Leaving out the part where he’s currently a baby, everything else you said was entirely true. You also left out the part where you were that someone.

“Oh, well that’s okay. At least I have an answer. Can you ever forgive me? I know I kinda blew up your entire thing with John.” She fiddles with her fingers again.

“I can forgive but I don’t know if I can forget. I’ve been to hell and back in the matter of 2 months and the one person I had left walked away from me.” You sigh and that crushing weight comes back again.

“Hey, don’t do that.” She squats down in front of you. “If there’s anything I know about John, it’s that you were the only thing he ever talked about. I know more about you than you would think. He loved you with his entire being. He didn’t walk away because he wanted to, it was because he thought he had to.” She smiles and grabs your hands. “I know my opinion means nothing, but I would talk to him. Just let him explain it to you.” You nod as she stands up.

“I’m really glad I got to talk this out though, it’s a weight lifted from my shoulders. I have to go catch a bus back home though, I hope things get better for you.” She smiles softly before heading out the door to your room.

What just happened? Price wasn’t having an affair? Tia wasn’t trying to seduce him?

You picked up your bag and didn’t even care about how you were dressed. Laswell had the boys, and you had a mission.

You were gonna get John back.

The car ride to his base was quiet, the first time in months your head has truly been calm. The radio was off and the sounds of the traffic around you was the only sound that reached your ears.

Your senses only came back to you when you pulled up to the gate and flashed your ID. You remembered the building Laswell told you John was staying in.

Pulling up, you froze. Both hands were still on the steering wheel, the AC still blowing cold air as it hit you. You’d been on auto pilot for so long, it was almost as if your body brought you here without your consent or control.

Reorientating yourself, you took in your surroundings and filled your lungs with air, taking the moment to regain your control. Then, you shut the car door, walked into the building and found John’s room.

You said a silent prayer that Laswell told you the right one as you knocked. Footsteps sounded on the other side after a minute, and when the door finally opened, there he was.

“Y/N?” You felt tears building behind your eyes, but you pushed them back as you stared at the man you loved. The man that you had so little trust in, that you’d assumed he had an affair with a 19 year old. John, the man who had shown you so much undying love in recent months, was right within your reach. “Are you okay?”

“We need to talk.”

“Come on in.”

————

After hours spent explaining what happened to you after he left the mission site, your talk with Tia and where you’ve been mentally, tears were streaming down your face. It felt good to finally let it all out to John, to clear the air after so much miscommunication.

“Why didn’t you talk to me sooner?” He reached over to grab your hand, giving it a squeeze. “I would’ve explained everything. I’m so sorry you’ve been going through this alone. I should’ve come to you instead of running away from the problem.”

You took a deep breath, steadying your voice. “I didn’t know at the time. My brain never let me think of that as a solution. I was grappling from Snyder did, what I saw with you and Tia, Soap being in the hospital-“ A shuddering breath left you as you continued. “I was so in over my head that my judgement was fogged. I felt so alone. Simon was the only one who halfway understood what I was going through.” You laughed softly, “If you count grunting and sleeping on my chest as understanding.” You shook your head as tears fell harder.

John closed his eyes as he sighed. “I’m stuck here for a few more months until I can request a transfer back. How about you let me take one of them. I can take Gaz, split the load? I talked to Laswell about it, it was her idea.”

Your eyes shot up to him. “Really? You’d do that?”

“Are you serious? We’ve been in this together from the start. I’ve left you drowning for months, it’s about time I start helping again. With limited room here, I can only help so much though.” Looking around, you cringed at how truly small the room was. It made you thankful for your suite back at the compound.

“I can have Laswell bring Gaz tomorrow morning. I have some paperwork that needs to be filed. Laswell wants me to sign a few things and give a full written report on the deployment start to finish.” John nodded.

“That’s fine, I’ll call her later this afternoon. Are you going to be okay driving back? I can follow you there?”

“It’s okay. I could use the alone time actually.” You smiled to reassure him.

He squeezed your hand again to return the sentiment. “Don’t ever be afraid to call. I know it’ll take some time for us to return to what we had, but I’m hoping we can start with baby steps.” You tried to hide your smile at that.

“No pun intended?” You laughed as he shook his head and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“I’m happy to see you smile.” John brought you in for a hug. “I’m serious though Y/N. I want you to ask for my help if you need it.”

“I will John. Thank you.” You backed up a little, looking at him. “I’m willing to take small steps towards healing us.”

“We’ll do it together. I’ve got to go do firewatch. I wish you could stay longer.” John ran his hand down your arm. “Please get back safely.”

“I will. I’ll let Laswell know you’ll be calling her about Gaz.” With that, you both bid your goodbyes.

Driving back to the compound was quieter than the drive to John. Something in you felt off, like something was wrong.

Your internal instincts were churning in your gut, but you couldn’t put your finger on it, so you brushed it off as left over adrenaline from working up the nerve to talk to John.

Arriving back at the compound, Laswell was nowhere to be found. All that was left of her was a note taped to your door saying ‘Left to run Gaz to Price early. The other two are down for a nap. They’ve only been alone 10 minutes by the time you arrive back.’

You go to open the door, but hear a crash like someone knocked over furniture. You reach for your concealed weapon in your boot, ready to kill whoever is in there with Soap and Simon. Quietly and slowly, you opened the door, getting into the mindset that you need to clear this room.

Looking around, you see Simon asleep in the playpen, which meant whoever this asshole was had Soap. “Whoever you are, you better come out and surrender that baby back or you’ll be dead on sight.” You called out into the room with authority.

“Y/N? Is that you?” You almost dropped your gun at the sound.

“Come out with your hands up!” Your voice was shaky as it came out. You kept telling yourself your mind was playing tricks on you.

“Please tell me what’s happening?” Your gun fell out of your hands and onto your mattress, luckily somehow not going off.

“You’re not real.” You shook your head, running to grab Simon and get the hell out of there.

“Out of everything going on, I’m- Y/N…what happened to you?” You felt like you were gonna be sick. “You look like you’ve been through hell.” The figure stepped closer, and as a hand came to rest on your face, you finally let their name slip out of your mouth.

“Johnny?”

[profoundbondfanfic]

Hello there!

Can you please recommend some of the angstiest, filled-with-pining, slowest burning destiel fics (91w-esque sort of)? I want to feel the pain and pining (and eventual happiness).

Thank you! Have a lovely day <3

Hey there! Here are a few:

I Wanna Get Outside (Of Me) by emwebb17 (Explicit, 142k words)

Dean is a novice in the dom/sub world asked by his employer as a desperate last resort to be a sub for his recluse of a brother, Castiel. Castiel is a diagnosed OCD suffering from PTSD and agoraphobia, mysophobia, and dystychiphobia. Needless to say—he’s a mess who hasn’t stepped out of his home in literally seven years. The only times Gabriel can see traces of the way his brother used to be is when he feels in control—specifically when he has control over a sub. However, due to his idiosyncrasies and paranoia, keeping a sub around has been impossible. Enter Dean, who’s not a very traditional submissive, to try his hand at subbing for the hermit.

For Evermore by casblackfeathers (Explicit, 110k words)

There's no place like home. This was a line Castiel used to know by heart when he was a kid, watching The Wizard of Oz and believing fairytales were real. At thirty-one years old, he isn't a kid anymore, and it has been twelve years since he has known what home feels like. Twelve years. That's when his world had come crashing down and he had left his hometown, Holly Springs, with the broken pieces of what he once was to build a new life in San Francisco. But as circumstances force him to come back to the only place he swore he would never return to, Castiel is finally forced to face everything he once knew and loved. Especially when said everything is made of spring-green eyes and a stardust of freckles, wrapped in all the memories Castiel was not able to erase from his heart. After twelve years, Dean is as mesmerizing as Castiel remembers, but the scars of what was broken still run as deeply as the marrow of his bones, and Castiel will do everything he can to protect himself. After all, his favorite movie also taught him that 'until hearts can be made unbreakable,' he can’t listen to his own.

Memories Bring Back Memories (Bring Back You) by sobsicles (Explicit, 66k words)

When he wakes, he has no idea who he is. Not his name, what he looks like, or why he’s flat on his back, staring up at the stars littering the night sky. The first thing he learns about himself is that he has shitty instincts, especially if his first one is to protect the blue-eyed man currently stabbing someone in the face. Or, the story where two strangers can’t agree on much and know even less, but they’re both fairly certain that they’re in love.

On The Other Side by crowleyhasfeels, QuillsAndInk (Explicit, 63k words)

While deployed in Afghanistan, Dean Winchester writes letters to a girl who he's certain isn't listening. By chance, they are found by Professor Castiel Novak who takes the time to reply. Thus begins the tale of a man dragged back from the brink of destruction by the shattered pieces of one person he doesn't know how to love. This is a story of brokenness, love and triumph. This is the story of Dean and Cas.

Out of the Deep by riseofthefallenone (Explicit, 488k words)

Stay away from the light-beds. Stay in the deep. It is the first thing hatchlings are taught the moment their fans unfurl and they can swim without their parents to buoy them along. It is the first rule, the first law. It is the beginning of every boogey-monster bedtime story told when they settle against the cliffs to sleep. Castiel should have listened better.

Pick It All Up by thepinupchemist (Explicit, 126k words)

Army veteran Castiel Novak is a wreck after his tour in Afghanistan, brought home to his brother’s apartment in Lawrence, Kansas with scars both mental and physical. He copes poorly, and during one night of bad decision making, meets somebody just as much of a disaster as he is – a prostitute named Dean Winchester. And suddenly, two damaged men might not be as irreparable as they believed.

Quarantension by everandanon (Explicit, 293k words)

In which Dean and Cas weather quarantine together like any Good Friends would — by developing outstanding skills in self-deception and providing all the casual affection and strictly platonic* orgasms the other could possibly need to make it through.**  *Really not platonic **Spoiler: They need a lot.

Redemption Road by Various (Explicit, 652k words)

With Castiel having set himself up as the new God, drunk on power and volatile as a nuclear reactor, Dean, Sam, and Bobby find themselves on the run from the jealous, capricious monster wearing the face of their friend. Desperate for protection and wary of his brother’s mental state since Castiel unlocked Sam’s memories of Hell, Dean knows Castiel must be defused before he can wreak further havoc in Heaven or on Earth. Although Bobby advocates for destroying Castiel by whatever means necessary, Dean is convinced the Cas he once knew still remains, buried somewhere beneath the mass of poisonous souls and calling out for help. Determined to save the angel who once rescued him from Hell and redefined his purpose in life, Dean himself must resist the allure of the false deity vying for his obedience, and come to terms with the knowledge, long-suppressed, that his feelings for Castiel run much deeper than brotherhood. It is this bond, and the dubious distinction of the Righteous Man, that will ultimately grant Dean access to where Castiel’s grace languishes in Purgatory. However, what Dean brings back with him is broken, angry, and only half-angel, certainly not the Castiel he remembers—and nor is it the only thing that returns to Earth with them…

So Says The Sword by komodobits (Explicit, 85k words)

The briefing was simple: ‘Stand guard over the Michael Sword until the battle is ready to commence. Await further instructions.’ Castiel doesn’t mind working security duty; he was briefed shortly after the initial salvation of the Sword from the pit, and again before taking up his position. He knows what to do. However, it’s easy to forget that the green room isn’t real. Time moves differently there, the space ever-changing to make a prison of mountains, cathedrals, salt flats, orchards, and whatever Castiel was led to believe about Heaven’s greatest weapon—Dean Winchester is something entirely unexpected.

Stay With Me, Sweetheart by MandalaRose (Explicit, 142k words)

“Alright Cas, here comes the hard part. We’re gonna get you out of here, but we’ve gotta take the roof off and while we do that, we’re gonna have to cover you with a sheet to protect you from the glass. I’ll be right here though. I’m not going anywhere.” As he starts to drift away, he suddenly feels the press of Dean’s forehead against his own through the rough fabric and hears that warm, sunlit voice murmer quietly in his ear, too low to be overheard by the firefighters currently working to remove the SUV’s roof, “Stay with me, Sweetheart.” A single moment’s distraction ends with a serious car accident that leaves Castiel trapped in his vehicle. Fortunately for him, fire fighter Dean Winchester is there, never leaving Castiel’s side as the rest of his company work to free him from the mangled remains of his SUV. When the two meet again in the ICU, Castiel finds himself just as drawn to and comforted by the handsome fireman as he was during his accident. Dean is certainly attractive, but single father Castiel doesn’t have time or space in his life for a romantic relationship. Then again, there’s no harm in making a new friend, is there?

The Sawdust Men by linoresearch (Explicit, 123k words)

Castiel Novak is an inmate at a labour camp. Life is brutal and no one ever gets out. Castiel’s only goal is to go unnoticed by the barbaric guards, and the violent inmates. Dean Winchester is a soldier without a purpose since the civil war ended. Dean accepts an assignment at a labour-camp, under the mentorship of Alistair, the Commander. From the start, Dean and Castiel are drawn to each other, and their relationship develops in a way that changes their lives. But Alistair has his own plans for Dean, and Castiel is a complication. When Alistair fails to separate them through threats and violence, he turns to manipulation; feeding Dean’s confusion about his feelings for Castiel, and goading him into a terrible act in order to break him. As Dean and Castiel try to fight back, they uncover secrets that are more far-reaching than they ever imagined. In such a dangerous world, can they ever be together? Can they even survive?

[howtotrainabraincell]

I was curious if you had any head canons pertaining to Malik Al-Sayf and him as a person? Let's forget that he is an assassin for a second and focus on him as an individual. Like is he comfortable with the loss of his left arm or is he embarrassed by it? What sparked his interest in maps and making them? Why was he so close with Kadar his baby brother? The more humanizing elements.

INDEED, I DO HAVE HEADCANNONS ABOUT THE DAI OF JERUSALEM! Ahem... But fr tho I do have a lot of head cannons about Malik as a person.

I don't know why...but he gives major "I'm abusive and angry toward the idiot novice but I'm actually really sweet" vibes. I think he's a total sweetie bear behind constantly humbling Altair lol

I think we ALL know that Altair's redemption arc wouldn't have been the same without Malik's verbal bashings and occasional scroll throwing.

About the loss of his left arm...

He was angry at first. Very angry. He had plans of how he wanted to help the Brotherhood and further their cause he so believes in, and then suddenly it was all taken away. He was told that he could no longer be in the field lest he be unnecessarily slain and then sent to Jerusalem. (This winds up fueling his spite and he became obsessed with mastering one armed swordsmanship...to the point where he could put two armed Altair on his ass lol)

Now he did go of his own free will, but he knew they put him in charge to soothe any battered ego he had. The man felt that it was a form of pity and emotional smothering. He had felt that Al Mualim had "requested" him to depart from Masyaf as a way to keep him from killing Altair... because he wanted to. He had felt...betrayed by what he believed in after it took so much from him and then it just swept him to the side like an old sandal. But being away and trying to focus on his responsibilities helped. Being alone also gave him time to cool down from his anger and focus on mourning his baby brother which he needed a lot of time to do.

He's not necessarily embarrassed by losing his arm, but he does feel inconvenienced by it from time to time. Forgetting that he no longer has a left hand to multitask and reach for things with. He was mad when he discovered that he couldn't carry as many books as he used to be able to, but he's smart so he found ways to get by (one of them including making a certain novice carry them lest he refuse and get bonked on his hooded coconut)

Malik can handle himself and you just KNOW that he mastered his f- you glare by giving the death stare to anyone who looked for too long ahaha. He does not appreciate staring AT ALL. He has eyes to make eye contact with hello. He also gets tired of explaining his sudden missing limb and of people expressing sympathy at the beginning because it just refreshes everything - plus he's Malik Al-Sayf OKAY he doesn't need BOTH ARMS to be a BADASSARINO.

He also feels vulnerable from time to time, and he doesn't like that one bit. He already lives a high alert lifestyle so losing his arm put him on peak "don't touch me or I won't hesitate" mode. The vulnerability wore on him for a while but eventually he became confident enough in his skills to protect himself again and his love helped too.

Though in a way he does appreciate the new awareness that losing his arm has brought him. It made him more reactions quicker and he became more responsive - such as a catching a falling book in the blink of an eye or blocking the cat from bapping his quill in the inkwell and knocking it over lol. (He has a cat in there with him and you CAN'T TELL ME OTHERWISE)

As for his interest in maps and making them...

We know that Malik was jealous of the way that Altair from a young age was "the favorite" of Al Mualim - so we can assume that he does in fact feel jealousy and it affects him on different levels. Whether it consists of the manifestation of saltiness toward the one he's jealous of, or it results in him learning a new skill. SO -

Malik was jealous of the eagles. Yes, the bird. He was always jealous of how they could fly so high up into the sky and see everything, everywhere, far and wide from multiple angles, and it made him wonder if such a thing was possible for him. When he could, he loved climbing up to high places - not to perform the Leap of Faith - to see the view from above. He loved it. And it made him think about other ways he could see everything from different perspectives.

Then he discovered Cartography. Needless to say, he was ecstatic lol. Map making for him was the perfect way to achieve what he wanted. He could have an Eagle Eye view of a large area from multiple perspectives and see everything just like he wanted. He could even make multiple versions of it from different angles! He could make a map of Masyaf from his POV in the mountains OR from the top of the Bureau.

I also think that him being so into cartography is a bit of a traumatic response. If he has a map and he knows the place intimately or can study it to see what it holds, he feels better about sending someone there or going himself. He didn't know what the Temple of Solomon held that day...and if he had he would have made Kadar stay home.

I even have a head cannon that Malik makes multiple versions of maps not just from different perspectives and to have backup copies, but to troll people haha. You telling me that this man wouldn't make a fake as hell map to fool Templars in case they stole them? I just KNOW he gave Altair multiple maps and told him to keep the true one on his person so if the enemy was successful in snatching the maps they'd get BAMBOOZLED ACK-

Finally, you wanted to know why I think he was so close with his baby brother Kadar...

I believe that he was so close with his baby brother Kadar because he's a family man, he's loyal, and he loves hard. They didn't really have their parents growing up so more oft than not he felt alone in the world. But no matter how alone he felt Kadar was always there for him, whether it was annoying him, joking with him, or just sitting with him. He fell into the role of big brother easily and got used to being the protective provider. Without Kadar he no longer had someone to care and look out for and Malik didn't know what to do with himself besides bury himself in his work.

It felt like a knife to heart when he lost the only family he had ever truly had because he knew that the Brotherhood was merely a figment of family - not the true family that he wanted. He had always dreamed of Kadar and him having their own families and bringing them both together to be one big happy family. But when Kadar was killed the reality of that dream never coming true...hit him hard.

Malik was also incredibly angry by the slaughtering of his brother Kadar because he was so young. He had so much potential and so much life to live - and it was taken like it had never even existed. He had imagined teasing Kadar about falling in love when the time came, the pride he would feel watching his baby brother one day become a Master Assassin as he had always dreamed of, the happiness he would feel on behalf of his little brother when he became a father. He had imagined what it would've been like to grow old and have Kadar crack jokes about aching bones and greying hair. Malik had imagined watching his little brother grow up the same way parents would anticipate watching their child grow.

Now, for the rest of his life he'll be tortured by "what ifs" and possibilities that will never happen. Malik felt robbed of the one true gift he had ever received in his life - especially as most people in his position don't get what he had. Family.